#god I hate those things so fucking much
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just got trapped in the bathroom by a spider for like 20 minutes. stood on the edge of the bathtub for most of that bc I was so scared, then eventually realised with how bad I was shaking it was pretty likely that I'd fall and hit my head so i used a broom to open the door & yelled until my husband woke up and killed the spider. I'm free now, technically, but the spider won (I can't stop shaking and thinking about all the other big disgusting spiders that are probably all around me and I just can't see them)
#I have taken my emergency anxiety medication... there have been similar Spider Incidents that fucked me up for months#so like. I'm not risking that this time... if I stop being able to sleep in the dark again that would not be fun#because now I can hardly sleep just in general so I can not deal with that too#there's no spiders anywhere. zero spiders in this room. two cats though. they'd totally catch any spiders.#nope they wouldn't. they're useless. but they'd meow very obnoxiously until I kill the spider for them so. that's something?#spider alarm system#lol#I come back here when I have really important things to say#like. spider things#god I hate those things so fucking much#😭😭😭#tw spiders#personal
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english translation book 5 baby we are in the ‘people assuming kid form hua cheng is xie lian’s son’ era 🔥🔥🔥 / follow for more hualian silliness
#so the part of the book where kid hua cheng suddenly sits bolt upright#because he senses something in the room#and this 7 year old is just 👁️👁️ and radiating immense killing intent#hes so fucking funny 😭#i love him being weird and strange and offputting#‘dianxia why does the high schooler that hangs around your house sometimes have glowing red eyes and know things he definitely shouldnt#and crush things into dust with his bare hands and seem to hate the sun an-‘ mind your own fucking business#drawing baby hc was so much fun i hope i do it again soon#the secret is that xie lian is JUST as deeply weird as his husband but in a less obvious and threatening manner.#guy who has to keep his internal monologue internal because he is thinking things like “wouldnt wanna get choked by those hands!”#out of every god character he is the one who seems to have changed the most from immortality#dying presumably hundreds of times and being alone for hundreds of years does something to your brain#“xiao hua why does your cultivator talk weird and wear the same clothes and eat the same food and-” HE IS AUTISTIC!!!! AND JADED BY THE#PASSAGE OF CENTURIES!!! YOULL NEVER KNOW WHICH IS WHICH!!#my art#tgcf#tian guan ci fu#hualian#hua cheng#xie lian#art#tgcf meme#mxtx#天官赐福#lmao#hob#heaven official's blessing#the people have spoken...
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CHARLIE MAGNE from HAZBIN HOTEL (2019): Pilot - "That's Entertainment" ↳ "So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through... redemption?"
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel edit#hazbin charlie#charlie magne#hazbin edit#requested#hazbin hotel pilot#that's entertainment#charlie#my gifs#god ain't she the cutest little thing!#not gonna lie i get a bit emotional seeing her do The Pose during ''wonderful fantastic new hotel''#it's the same pose she does in the S1 poster :')#okay actually im back here to say some things in the tags:#holy almighty LORD these gave me so much grief to color in a way i thought looked nice#specifically the one of her in the news chair. sorry i was NOT gonna let that hideous highlighter green color assault all your eyeballs.#did i lose nearly two hours of sleep getting it right because i still have no idea what i'm doing? yes. worth it? YES. ohh yes.#i liked the seafoam look so i made the cloud sequence match :] or at least tried to#there WAS supposed to be another one of her in the news room but i just hated how it kept turning out so i scrapped it.#coloring the main series was one thing to learn but the PILOT? never has it been so obvious to me just how much more bright and vibrant#the colors got during the progression of the world design. also. if by any chance one of those cool and experienced#gif makers happens to see these tags and wants a good laugh: i've been doing this for how many months now? and just last NIGHT figured out#how to use the fucking eraser in photoshop....... thing is... i also draw. i KNOW what program tools look like. i KNOW ppl draw in PS.#i'm just a really silly fuckin goose!! TEEHEE FUCKING HEE I GUESS!#so for months i've been like ''god i wish i could just erase this part from the layer'' and looking at the eraser tool and just being like#''nah it's probably different and weird i'll just stick to what i know'' -> said boo boo the FOOL#see i could be in the club but i'd rather be aggressively neurodivergent about the silly queer demon cartoon that altered my brain chemical
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I know that Clover's gender is up to interpretation (the devs DID say so themselves) but I still feel weird when people make them exclusively male or female LOL Like it's TECHNICALLY fine??? but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth.
more in tags as usual because I am a yapper. i am so sorry for having strong opinions about gender and representation. i am usually more fun than this 🥲🥲🥲🥲
#whenever ppl talk about clover being male it feels like they are unconsciously reinforcing gender roles???#vague sexist vibes yknow#this is such an innocent thing to complain about but i dont care!! i am a HATER!!!!!!#I think it bothers me so much because it reminds me of how Kris was treated and is STILL being treated. “well in my headcanon he is a boy”#again its technically fine!!! the devs said its cool and i wont hate anyone for it. but its still so weird yknow#especially cus most ppl reason them to be a boy because “well he likes guns and thats a boy thing!!!!!!”#“his design looks like a boy but his animations are like a girl”#“he is a cowBOY and he looks masculine so-” shut up i will stick your head down a toilet#many people think its an obvious fact that they are male.#whenever the cast calls Clover by he or a boy in fan content I can feel my entire face shrivel up#“THEY WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT!!!” aka the curse that keeps me from enjoying anything thats just made for fun#i think its a case of self-insertiritis... even though clover is their own separate person as is UTDR's tradition#bonus points if they make them a boy so they can ship them with kanako without being gay 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨#🤨🤨🤨🤨bonus points if they make them female so they can ship them with flowey without being gay 🤨🤨🤨🤨#female clover is actually rare and not nearly as problematic. i can tolerate female clover because luckypatch is such a rare ship anyhow#this does not even mention the weird ships with martlet and ceroba. yeah its the monster girls only. and in those theyre also a boy#never starlo or dalv which thank god but. guess why. go figure#ive had people headcanon martlet knowing clover as a kid and dating them later? i do not need to explain why thats grooming LOL#the undertale yellow fandom on reddit. is so bad. god. do not go there#i know its filled to the brim with teens who have the media literacy skills of a wet piece of paper and their minds in the gutters 24/7 but#cmon.#the things they have done to ceroba and martlet. the curse of being women. girlypops i am SO sorry you do not deserve it#undertale#undertale yellow#uty#clover#ceroba#martlet
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i've been thinking about lesbian scott summers because the other day i made a jeanscott drawing where scott was a girl and like. how would it affect her, as a character, and how would it affect her relationship with other people (namely jean)?
scott's already canonically 'nervous' when it comes to his attraction to women. he's always like, "is this safe? it's not, it's not safe" until actively proven otherwise and EVEN THEN he's still like that (whyyy), and sure it might be because of his deadly eyes but add the lesbian into it. this shit takes place in the 60s, 70s, add the lesbian into it
#there is something about how society shapes people and how people shape society that is so hard to correctly show in media#in ways that aren't ooc. uncanny x-men begins in the 60s. bobby has been in the closet since the 60s#they already struggle because of how much the world hates mutants. add the fucking lesbian into it#there is something about the idea of xavier having repressed bobby's sexuality or smth like that because the ppl would hate them more#if they were queer. that i think would be fun to add into the jeanscott (+ xavier and perhaps bobby) dynamic#nothing can keep those two apart. so even if their sexuality was repressed. they still wouldn't be apart yk what i'm saying??#but.... society.......#smth about--#they can't help the fact that they're mutants so maybe queer people can't help the fact that they're queer#but it's the 60s#and they're lesbians#in the 60s#their love would still be the same i believe#but the way they might act upon it. the nature of their relationship. how much they show to the public. etc#all of that would change#the thing is. how it would change#the way society views people and the way people view society can affect how they show themselves to others#i'm not explaining myself correctly but please jst think about it#lesbian jeanscott... my beloved...#marvel comics#x-men comics#jeanscott#scott summers#jean grey#and GOD this isn't even talking about how the writers would. write them yk#like if scott was a girl we can know for a fact that they would not have been canon back then#so we can at least assume they wouldn't be together#until very recently#man this is so complicated#avis' post
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#I'm sorry I'm behind on asks I feel like it never fucking ends#can't talk to family about it. they worry too much. cant talk to friends about it. they just start giving unwarranted (well meaning) advice#and plus they basically live with me atp with how often they're over helping me fuck do I do?? bother them more??#dude it's embaressing even if it's not chronic shit it's just unlucky shit like how u gonna have an allergic reaction & then seizure same d#idk about therapy therapists scare me. it's not a therapy issue though I'm just tired and in pain all the fucking time#one more person says “same omg” or “well have you tried-” i will start cutting peoples throat and eating their livers#you do NOT know what it's like having to write your own will before 30 like this shit aint right shit aint fair#makes me petty and shit too people who are healthy like can you just fucking suffer why do you get that freedom but not me#it just never ends#like I really fucking hate it when people say “oh you have so much to live for” because no I don't#Not so sound like a right winger gosh dang god fearer but like deadass people focus so heavily on “mental health!!” they don't#realize even if you feel better and get therapy or shit that's not gonna be realistically helpful for anything physical going on in sm#it's a cycle even if you manage 1 thing - the medications cause a 2nd thing#and that's alongside all the OTHER things you take medications for which cause all those other things#it's like multiplying and makes your body slowly deplete but like never quite die. like I know realistically I can just die anyday#and yeah it is getting worse but it's no different because it's not about that#when you're sick it's not just “OMG DYING!!!” it's like. everything else in your life dies.#you can't cook for yourself. you can't clean. you can't move. you can't hang out with people anymore. you can barely work LMFAO.#I'm REALLY close to quitting it's not even funny lmao. cant put clothes on without struggling.#do people not know it's. physically impossible. to even eat sometimes. just vomit it all up or seize.#yeah it does make me petty#rant
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i think if you think someone is a bad person simply because they view/portray a character differently than you do, you need to take your ass outside and talk to real people. this is ESPECIALLY true when yall know that you're almost entirely projecting who YOU are as in individual onto these characters. you cannot expect people to portray a character as you with better hair-- none of us know each other. we're all strangers. your story- the one you use to try and force parallels with your fave- is nonexistent as far as the next person is concerned.
im not saying there's anything wrong with projecting on to your faves. TONS of people do it-- which is why, you're not always going to find people who view the character the exact same way you want them to. because their projection looks different from your projection.
if you want a character to be portrayed exactly like you want them to, if you want a character that shares your likeness (whatever that means to you) create your own original character. no one can "take that away from you" because it's your own creation and you dictate what's true or not.
everything else is all entirely up to the individual's interpretation that's consuming the media, same as you.
#i get so tired of people arguing about HEADCANONS#they're headcanons for a reason#idk when fandom became this thing where if you decide you don't like canon you can completely disregard it#then argue people down or shade fellow fans when they dont follow suit.#it's esp crazy when your headcanons are so niche that it's almost entirely unique to you and you're out for blood bc it's not widespread#that's like me believing for the last 3 years that aizawa gave up smokin when he was younger then picked up a bad sweets habit in it's plac#then me seeing someone write a fic or draw a comic where he's smoking a cigarette and turns his nose up at cake#or me getting mad because other fans dont headcanon him as half-brazilian#fuck i look like harassing people because they don't follow MY MADE UP LORE????#he's NOT my character!#i dont care how attached i am to him and how much time i've spent developing him as a character on my own#i can however dictate the facts about kenji or arika or maria or hiro or edna and so on#because those ARE my characters#god... i bet i would've hated having to play in the sandbox with some of yall as kids
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#just needed to vent for a sec but oh god am i tired of people#'friends' both irl and online got me fucked up lately#mental healths been in the shitter almost nonstop this year#familys always got me up the wall#i just feel like I'm constantly treading water and i am *tired*. like so fucking TIRED#it's never enough; it's too much; no not like that; but not that either; it's all wrong wRoNg WrOnG#ik im sleep deprived and possibly pms-y and that is most certainly not helping things rn but...#gods i see less and less of a reason to get out of bed and bother with anything ever again#wtf is the purpose#i can't keep friends to save my life bc im apparently a fuckin doormat and interesting as unflavored rice or smth#how hard is it to feel like you maybe sorta kinda matter and aren't an unlovable worthless piece of shit#years of therapy; trying meds; everything under the sun.... and nothing. lows and highs and dips of every kind and yet ..nothing#and maybe im just very much in my feelings rn and just yelling into the void.. but it hurts and im tired of pretending it doesn't.#i hate how hard it is to make friends as an adult especially irl. and how gossipy and cliquey and gross and mean ppl can be#of getting called childish and naive and boring for wanting to be a decent person and having interests outside of partying#(not attacking those traits but tired of getting attacked for *not* being 'fun' enough or 'social' enuf or 'sensitive' for having feelings)#enough*#i just want to go eat drywall and stand in the rain and let it help me pretend im not crying blood rn.#like every cell in my body isn't trying to spontaneously combust.#'it gets better' ..yeah? when. when i was 14? when i was 23? when im 37? when im 55? 82? WHEN.. bc im so sick and tired#and no this isn't me writing a final note or whatever it sounds like; i just wanted to word vomit bc ive never been good w sadness#and ive got such an overwhelming amount of it rn i can't even turn it into anger & spite & use that for productivity... i just want to rot#to lie down and be covered by plants as i sleep and just slowly fade into a cloud or smth like it's a ghibli movie or wtv.#im like shaking from how stupidly emotional i feel rn. the lack of empathy these days is fuckin astounding#common sense & empathy are lacking in absolutely droves these days. some days i hate the internet & tech for its irreparable damages sm#but here we are and here it shall remain. long after us; and *long* after us ..... *sigh*#anyway ima go try to take a nap or smth. I'll see ya when i see ya. take care my lovelies#if u read all this i prob owe you a cookie lol
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omg hold on i just realized something!!!
the Blackbeak Matron is the ONLY one who knew about Manon's bloodline, like-- Manon is an actual fucking queen by birthright and the Matron is the only person who knew it because Manon never learned about this.
so remember when Asterin was telling Manon what happened to her with her hunter and witchling? The Matron warned Vesta and Sorrel not to bring it up to Manon or there will be dire consequences.
Now hear me out: Manon fucking loves Asterin. If she knew what her grandmother had done, she would have probably done something like take the Thirteen and just leave or something like that.
We all know how the Matron loved threatening Manon that she'd replace her, but while it worked on Manon, her grandmother never really intended to do that.
It's the same reason why she wanted Vesta and Sorrel to remain quiet: she has a literal fucking queen at her beck and call. Manon is ready to do anything for her grandmother just to get some praise, and the Matron isn't going to let go of that. It's why she needed Manon loyal to her (through fear because Manon didn't really trust her but she fears what she'd do)
So at the end of the day, the Matron was after more power. She kept Manon by her side through unorthodox tactics because she loved having so much control over her. And also because of Manon's royal blood, she can have so much.
I think it's also why she wasn't fully against Erawan showing interest in Manon. Because with that union, she will reign supreme.
It's just-- the way she played Manon for her whole life for no other reason than being a shitty person is what irks me the most. She literally used everything that is Manon and twisted it, turning it into something ugly.
I'm sorry but when Manon just killed Rhiannon without even questioning it? Just blindly obeying her grandmother because it's what she's been conditioned to do???
Later on, we see Manon really struggling between doing what is right and doing exactly what her grandmother wants even when she doesn't agree with it. Every time, her grandmother wins (until the part where she was about to execute Asterin) and I honestly think that the Matron was happy with how she has the actual Queen of Witches under her command.
#booklr#books and reading#throne of glass#manon blackbeak#tog#asterin blackbeak#empire of storms#kingdom of ash#queen of shadows#spoilers#hello i was just talking to myself about manon and I suddenly realized this???#the matron fucking orchestrated the whole thing#starting by killing her daughter and unleashing hell on her granddaughter#it's why she hates asterin#because she's probably the only person who can have power over manon#because manon actually loves her#and this whole thing irks the matron because she's anti feelings and she hates how despite all she did manon was still capable of loving#asterin (although she's terrible at showing this love but asterin bless her knows and she loves manon just the same)#anyway is there is a limit to how evil this woman is? probably not#she hurt manon so deeply-- starting with killing her parents then making her kill her sister without her even knowing it#constantly using asterin and the thirteen against her??#saying and doing everything that she said and done???#and my poor manon endured this for over a century like don't you get tired of this bullshit??? leave the girl alone for a change???#but no she she needed to torment her like this because that was how she controlled her#she's all about power and control and will stop at NOTHING to achieve this#this is why i say that manon is emotionally fragile#she's not aware of it because she never was allowed to feel it let alone name it and (god forbid) express it. like underneath it all she ha#so much hidden deep inside. i also feel like yrene will be the one to help her navigate those emotions and just... acknowledge them and#actually feel them. but this won't be easy at all because for over a hundred years it was drilled into her that this display is forbidden s#when those feelings come to the surface she'd try to push them down because it's a trauma response. she was never safe to feel or express
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hard work being a single Motha
#nina speaks#keep my boys on me at all times#like a GLOCK#sorry guys hard work raising two beautiful boys#and this hideous tumor in my head#slay!#god i love when the pinterest is updated tho#i lied no the fuck it’s not nina lmao#but that shit takes me hours so im taking a break#when im depressed i just sit in the jk and rs boards#and sigh deeply and twirl my hair#kings truly also mechanic stan wheeeew#love u rural colorado normie lumberjacked probably autistic KING#whoever asked me abt ikes friend group#hold on boss i gotta get my NOTES out#yes i am insane#also i do look kind of insane#but tfw so much happened to ur body#and face that u can…no longer look at urself in the mirror#i had a stannic attack and had to do my makeup out of the corner of my eye#but u know self care jump scare same difference yeah#i hate being ILL i want to answer october spooky time asks#here’s to hoping#here’s to coping#also the college moodboards don’t talk to me like THEYRE HAPPY???#JK WEARING COLORS?? FOR THE CHILDREN??? ;-;;#RAVENSTANS LIL READING GLASSES#tfw u clown ur sbf everyday and call him cuatros ojos and he realizes uve never been to an optometrist#and u keep squinting at things when u read them but not in a dyslexic way#in a those letters are blurry and idk what they are but that’s normal right everyone’s letters look like that HUH??? HUUUH NO BABY
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i know its been said before but it truly is absolutely fucking crazy to me that saying that the genocide in palestine is bad is like.. a radical and controversial take. i cannot believe that more usamericans arent fucking furious that their tax money is being spent on committing genocide. why does no one give a shit. i feel like im losing it for real
#i still think abt palestine like every day and i know a lot of people on tumblr do too but i feel the rest of the world has moved on#its so. infuriating to think that nothing abt this will change if kamala gets elected like#idk i know she will be better than trump but will she do anything to help palestinians? it seems like the answer is a huge 'no'.#i cant be enthusiastic abt her at all when thats the case. im so fucking sick of american politics I just don't even care anymore#american politics is just. things get worse or things stay the same. those are the two options#this time around it appears it will be more of the same#which is supposed to be acceptable i guess bc at least it wont get worse#but im getting so fucking sick of this cycle. it feels like nothing will ever improve and america will just keep doing horrible things#and people will continue to not care bc its not happening to us. so whatever right?#god.#im actually sorry for fucking election posting bc I hate election posting but ive been thinking abt all of this so much recently i had#to just get it off my chest#us politics#meow!!
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now it is incredibly late to be saying this but god the month-long hiring process has sucked kjsdf turns out thats the perfect amount of time for the excitement-anxiety to wear off and then the hopeful responsible problem-solving forward-thinking optimism to wear off and then the "fuck it" dissociation to wear off and whatever other defensive layers i had up between me and "huh maybe itd be easier if i died than to get a new job to do badly at" to wear off lol whoops. please. please. please. its literally gonna be fine once i actually get started and get in the swing of it. i JUST have to survive a few more miserable days <- NOT IN DANGER. just fucking miserable
#ILL WANT TO BE ALIVE IN LIKE A MONTH KSJHFG i promise i promise i promise.#bwahhhhh. compounding factors: i still have very few details about important things. see which of those i can solve on monday.#and. i will have one coworker lol. and ill be with her fulltime while im Getting Oriented. just me and her in a small office for#eight hour shifts. thats so much time i can make someone hate me right out the gate. thats also a temporary problem kjsfg#please. god. the actual work of this job is fucking easy street im looking forward to that so much. please dont let me fail at the#starting hurdle just due to the autism and the depression.#and please dont let me fuck up in front of nice older country southern ladies.
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Why is it that Oscar season is the worst time for me as a film fan? It's like being a thrift store shopper on Halloween and a bunch of sorority girls come in an make fun of the clothes for a half hour and then leave to go buy a sexy penguin costume at the Spirit Halloween store...
#I just hate all the rancid takes#I hate the speculation#I hate oscar parties#I hate the show itself so so much I haven't watched it in a decade#except when mark was nominated...god that sucked for me#the only good thing about it is showing a few more classic films on streaming services because of oscars#but even that is like pffft I could just go watch those somewhere else#honestly hate when people at work try to engage in water cooler oscar talk with me#bitch I know you're slumming doing this fuck off your opinion on X movie is less than nothing to me...
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Ok so these designs are cute as hell, the Internet is just mean
I have too many thoughts about a game I still need to watch
#goodbye volcano high#i dont have the money to buy it but god i need to watch a playthrough when i have time it's so interesting to me#like; the theme of 'yeah we're going die but that doesn't mean we can enjoy what time we have left' sounds amazing to me love that#its so funny i was actually watching a review of it that was basically 'this game sucks and here's why'#and then it just started listing off shit like- 'the characters designs are pastel they're nonbinary you die no matter what'#and then my neurons just went off and went '👁️👁️ oh! sounds amazing i want to see more'#fuck yeah pastel nonbinary dinosaurs lets go#well i think its just fang thats nonbinary and then two other trans characters#i saw a cutscene! and it was about the experiences of being an apart of a family as sec-gen immigrant and trans-#and i thought that was cool as hell dont recall ever seeing that in any of thr arts ive seen before (but there's lots of art out there!)#heard it got some glitches tho (havent looked in depth of what those glitches are) hopefully it got patched out#also im so fucking pissed i saw the gator game before i saw this 😮💨 (context; apparently made by people who made a fangame where they#the mc of this game a datable side character and they only have a happy ending if they detransition? which fucking yikes😬)#i saw people say 'oh but they did it empathetically' like how the fuck is taking a canon nb character and making them only happy through#detransitioning empathetic that sounds super fucking shitty and gross#i think a character that detransitions can be done and would be interesting to see- but this just reeks of people being transphobic for real#oh also purple dino has a slug or worm or something apparently! seems cute! just a lil thing#apparently its a rhythm game; listened to some of the songs and it sounded good! sadly i suck at rhythm games#but apparently failing doesn't affect the story? kinda wish it would but honestly better for me lol-#pink one and fang end up dating i believe- from what i saw pink is like- soft spoken artist? dunno if accurate but she's cute#all the characters are cute just look at them!!! awesome#also they have to just continue school like normal before they die and honestly thats so real#also saw people dislike the fact you dont see the characters actual die or the meteor#which is ??? dunno i just think some things are better left implied than shown-#anyways man i keep trying to find neat stuff about the game and all i see is people bitchin about it or praising the shit fan on instead 😔#man if i had two nickles for a time i grew to become obsessed with a media only for loads of people to hate id have two nickles#first nickle is kat elliot she's such a cool character Internet wasn't ready for her#also yes i saw obsessed i can just tell this is something ill go bonkers for#i mean god look how much text is in my tags for this already! and i still need to see the game in it's fullness!#im sure there's other cool shit
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thinking really hard about logging into my old tumblr acc after being gone for like a year and a half cause i stumbled upon a post that led me to my old mutuals and i teared up a lil </3 but also i feel so ashamed i left without saying a word to anyone aaaa
#like i genuinely feel so bad for simply disappearing from people's lives :c#i used to talk to some of them daily and like even had plans to see one of them on holiday to another country?? like that level of close#and then well my mental health went to shit i took a semester off uni and disappeared from my irl friends' lives too for a good 6 months#some of my mutuals had my ig and we followed each other but i also haven't really been there much since dissappearing last year so#but i just snooped into some of their accounts and seeeing what they're up to made me want to talk to them sooo bad#everyone was so cool and kind and i miss them so much it's just i feel so guilty and also don't even know if i'm able to mantain constant#contact and conversations with people now. like it's been even hard for me to stay in touch with my irl friends aaa#why must my brain hate me so much and not let me socialize !! i used to be such an extroverted person what the fuck happened!!#i know some of them messaged me worried and i felt so guilty for not responding but i saw those dms when i was very much deppressed#so i never answered and now i feel like it's too late GOD!!#anyways at least it was nice snooping and seeing how they're doing i genuinely wish them only good things they're fucking great#maybe i just need to suck it up and just go back and talk to people again but i get so overwhelmed just thinking about it!!#okay it's like 4 am i'm posting this and maybe deleting it in the morning sorry for the rant i just am feeling a lot !!
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...the "nothing happened" scene has caused my brain to latch on to zoro with a vice grip. send help.
#this pathetic commited hard shell hiding inner softness little cunt! i hate him i hate him so much im so mad im so fucking just. just.#he does not believe in anything above his goals. until he believes in his crew that is. and people are fragile things and they mean#SO much to him it makes me sick he makes me sick fucking moss-head little bitch.#& like the way it recontextualizes zoro's priorities makes his behaviour in the previous saga hit so much harder... losing my mind.#absolutley losing my mind.#... fuck i think i'm a little in love with him.#AND HE DIDN'T LET SANJI DO IT! HE COULD HAVE! you could bring up honour but zoro only cares about that as a SWORDSMAN.#& like tbh thematically speaking it's reductive to say it pertains to whether sanji would be “strong enough” especially when considering ho#much op decries needlessly given sacrifice wholesale. it wasn't about that. these are people zoro cares about & he doesn't want to lose#them. he won't sellout luffy for the crew & he won't let anyone else make that choice & he won't let luffy know he did it. he's#committed to being the world's greatest swordsman but first & foremost he is committed to his CREW. to the group of strays he loves!#& just the throughlines of fear & commitment w zoro... & the forced question of what is strength when faced with the loss of those you love#hands are fucking shaking absolutley fucking losing my mind.#this stupid fucking lug of meat.#HE MADE ME FUCKING CRY.#oh god the way it reframes him swearing to luffy to never lose again after the duel w mihawk... the subtle character development. cryin..#roronoa zoro#grey's one piece tag
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