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sinner-sunflower · 7 months ago

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P.2 HH Lucifer-centric AU 13/?

STORY 1, PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 12, PART 14, PART 14.5, PART 15, PART 16, PART 17, PART 18, PART 19, PART 20, PART 21, PART 22, PART 23, PART 24, PART 25, PART 26

Luci is the older sib among the Sins but he's the youngest among the Archangels.

I guess technically, he's the suffering middle child.

If y'all see a mention baby bro or little brother in the Prequel, pretend like you didn't see it ;laksldakl;

-----------------------------------------------

Perhaps Lucifer should've requested a 1 visitor per visit rule just like he should've expected that he's going to get tackled and suffocated in physical affection by the Sins and Charlie as soon as Belphegor opened the door.

Not that he doesn't like the hugs but he's just one tiny guy and he's pretty sure he's about to be buried alive under these giants.

Thank fuck for Belphegor for prying them off of him before he actually suffocated.

Belphegor: What did I say?! What did I just say?! What are you all? Children?!

A gasp and a coughing fit later, he finally calmed down enough to get his breathing steady. He thanks Alastor for the water, taking huge sips to fix his throat.

'Not to self: don't get buried alive. It's not a fun experience.'

He looks over at the now kneeling Charlie and Sins, head bowed as the Sin of Sloth relentlessly scolds them.

Belphegor: -powers in Hell and you can't follow one simple rule? May I remind you all what happens if I'm disobeyed while I'm treating someone?

All: Visiting rights will be stripped off.

Belphegor: That's right. And I am not above putting a ward on any of you to make it stay that way.

Never mess with Dr. Belphegor. As much as Lucifer is amused, he takes pity on his kids (his kids!) and speaks up to save them from the doctor's wrath.

Lucifer: I think they get it, Bel.

The kneeling demons cower as Belphegor sends them one last glare before huffing and went to typing something in her tablet again.

Beelzebub: Sorry for getting carried away, babe. We just got scared.

Asmodeus: Charlie's call really scared us. Did something happen in Heaven?

Satan: Tell me if that bastard Michael did this, I'll go to Heaven myself and beat his ass! In fact, I'm going over there right now. Open a portal.

Leviathan: Christ, Satan. Can you do one minute without thinking of doing something impulsive?

Satan: Don't say that name here! And fuck you! You're one to talk. Which one of us almost obliterated their ring in anger earlier, huh??

Lucifer: Wha- Levi??

Leviathan: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Mammon: Wait, is that why the elevator took so fuckin long to work? I thought I was gonna be stuck there foreva!

Charlie: At least you're all here now!

Charlie's wholesome sentiment made her aunts and uncles coo, wholeheartedly agreeing with her.

Lucifer: My duckie is right. Even though I said I was fine, you all still came for me. I'm starting to feel bad about making you all rush here every time I get hurt.

Satan: Don't you dare. No one is forcing us to be here.

Beelzebub: Right! Plus you always did the same for us.

He remembers those moments. When the rings formed and the Sins grew enough to move and handle them on their own, he was pretty lonely. Sure, he had Lilith, but children brought a different kind of joy with their company.

Plus, he loved indulging in others and all the children wanted was his attention, which he was always so happy to give.

The last person he would've thought to call him for help first was, believe it or not, Leviathan.

Levi had always presented himself as independent, acting like he's not as young as he was. Lucifer saw the aquatic demon's admiration for him, often mimicking how he talks, walks, and even dresses.

Lilith says it's envy (Because what else could it be, Luci? Isn't he the Sin of Envy?) but Lucifer knows better. He knows that Leviathan only looks at him in admiration. He looks at him like he hung the stars. Like Lucifer means something. Like he deserves to be looked at that way.

He doesn't but he's not going to tell young Leviathan that.

Anyway, Levi couldn't get the raging storms of Envy under control despite trying so hard. He was crying, begging Lucifer to believe that he did everything he could but nothing was working.

So he did what every good sibling/pseudo-father wouldo.

He drops everything and headed straight to Envy. In fact, he ran so fast he forgot to tell Lilith he was leaving.

Instead of fixing the situation himself, Lucifer chose that moment to teach Leviathan. He stayed in Envy until the other got it and not once did he berate Levi for not knowing something that wasn't even taught. It was his fault after all that Levi couldn't control it as he should've known that it doesn't come to everyone that easily.

The little scolding he got from Lilith when he came home super late was worth seeing a proud face on little Levi.

Lucifer: And I always will.

When it doesn't look like they're leaving him anytime soon, he figures he could just tell them now. He sat up a little straighter and internally braces himself for the expected uproar.

Lucifer: Heaven is on the verge of a civil war.

He winces. 'Way to rip off the bandaid, Lucifer.'

The room halted. They stared at him as they try to comprehend what he said just said. Then all at once, everyone bursts into screaming and panic, asking questions at him, at each other, at no one, at everyone. It was chaos and Lucifer can feel something rumble inside him. He figures Roo is enjoying all this unfold.

To be fair, he should've thought better than to say something like that out of the blue.

Lucifer: Sorry from dropping a bomb like that suddenly.

Satan: A bomb???

Mammon: Mate, that's a fuckin' nuclear one if I know one! The fuck you mean a war??

Lucifer: A civil war.

Charlie: What? How are we roped in it?? It's not because of the last extermination right?

Belphegor: You couldn't have told us this the moment you arrived?

Satan: Are we involved? Is that why Michael shot a freakin' laser through the sky??

Lucifer: No but-

Beelzebub: Oh god.

Lucifer: Guys, if you just-

Leviathan: Ozzie, how is our forces? Do you think we have enough manpower?

Lucifer: Guys-

Asmodeus: If it's only our fighting forces, then no. I'm sure a lot of demons would be willing to fight. Plus we have the firepower.

Lucifer: I-

Belphegor: Do we even know if angelic weapons would harm a higher ranked angel?

Oh for fucks-

Lucifer: Ê̵̡̟͔͉̱͓͓̪̝̫͙͇̞͛̓͐͒͒̎͒̋͘Ǹ̶̛͙̲̮͓͈̳̗̟̣̊̍͋́̇̀̋̐́̚̕͜O̷͇͔̒̇͋́͋́̓́͂́͆͋̅͘U̴̡̙̫͕̞̩͎̭̤̤͙̠̓̐̊̚͜G̵͖͇̘̘̩̟̗̠̬̐̈́͛́̾̈́̾̍́̈́̏͠͝H̶̢̬͉̯̞͇̯͈͙̜̬͚̟͙̊̈́͋͂̂̾̒̅̈́̆͊͗͂̚͝.̷̧͇͔͖̜̳̲̪̤͇̇͊͑̋͛̾̓͜͜

The room rattles from his voice. He stop his horns and halo from coming out. Lucifer can't see it but everyone else is staring at him in abject horror as his skin turned into a dark, glitchy mess.

He calms himself by taking in deep breathes until the fire in his mouth extinguishes.

Lucifer: Can I speak now?

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skyeblue8 · 1 year ago

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Ⳑσσƙട ɬιƙҽ 𝜏ԋҽ Լᥙട𝜏 Ꭱιɳց ιട ᥙρ ɳҽχ𝜏 ~ 💋💖

–> So this was honestly a bit tricky at first as, originally, and as much as I criticize her other works within Helluva Boss, I thought Vivzie's overall portrayal of the Lust Ring was pretty on point as it exhibited an environment similar to what I would expect to see in a Red Light District. Then I started the think more about practicality, other-worldly originality, and the fact we only really see Lust at night and have no idea what it's like in the day, so, in the end, this is what I've got...

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

Lust's Environment:

♥︎♡ Now, while the whole neon light/Red Light District aesthetic Viv was going for is all well and good, I think that it's also both impractical and kinda boring as A) There's no way the lights would look good in the daytime (especially considering we only see Lust at night) and B) It's kinda boring considering we see this exact thing within the Pride Ring.

♡♥︎ On top of that, I'm not a fan of the whole blue/dark blue thing for the ring, or for Asmodeus in general.

♡♥︎ I mean, yeah, it looks good within the club, but outside of it, it just doesn't suit the lustful prince at all or his citizens as they don't coincide with each other at all.

♥︎♡ Because of this, I wanted to distinguish the ring and it's environment from other places in Hell, so I headcanon that Lust's hues would be pink, hot pink, fuschia, light purple, a hint of red, and white (day) and black (night). Overall, the environment would have a dual nature to it depending on day or night, which I'll explain more in a little bit. The color pallete and general environmental feel of Lust would be similar to that of Spring Broken's.

♥︎♡ Moreover, similar to the canon Sloth Ring, the whole ring would have a wistful cloudy environment, kinda like non-stop aphrodisiacs pumping into the atmosphere, combined with lovecore vibe that frequently toes the line between cutesy and outright raunchy.

♡♥︎ Of course, the whole place will have a general heart motif in skies, the buildings, most of the flora and fauna, the fashion, and especially the people. Because of this, I think Lust would, ironically, give off a sort of faux innocence/Heaven-like vibe as it looks wholesome at first glance but is, in fact, anything but.

♥︎♡ This, of course, brings me to the duality vibe I mentioned earlier. During the daytime, the Lust Ring is arguably a more tame in its hypersexual themes (though admittedly not by much) as, while it's still openly lewd, it's more casual and common since it is the norm for those living there. Also because of the fact that, despite it being Hell, people still have shit to do and can't always spend their time focusing on sex acts (on less, of course, it's their job).

♥︎♡ Also, At night, though, this is where the Red Lights District aspect comes into play. The light pink aphrodisiac environment becomes more bold and vibrant, transforming into hues of hot pink and red that just tempt you and lure you in. The suggestive neon signs begin to shine bright and, overall, everyone is a lot more insatiablly freaky.

♡♥︎ In terms of any thematic layouts in the buildings and the properties themselves, I headcanon that any residential building will likely just be heart-shaped while actual businesses, food centers, whatever, will be some sort of sex-based shape, probably phallic more often than not, if we're being honest here.

♥︎♡ In short, I like to think of the ring as one big 'ol giant sex pun reminiscent of those frequently seen in Panty & Stocking (hense the people's behaviors). Hell, even the most mundane things like restrooms, coffee shops, and even plants will relate to something sexual in some way, because there, that's just normal. 🤷🏾‍♀️

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

Lust's Residents:

• Hellborns: Succubi, Incubi, and Satyrs (Ancient Greek Horndogs)

–> Indentification: Vibrant skin tones (Hot Pink, Fuschia, Pinkish-red all w/ Black highlights); Frequent heart-shaped markings on wings, horns, and bodies; heart-shaped tails, Lust-related abilities [See Abilities]

• Sinners: Any one else who doesn't look like the aforementioned Hellborns, but have a similar heart motif w/ lighter skin tone & white pattern

• (Hellborn) Abilites: Aphrodisiacs, Life-draining of others through sexual acts, shape-shifting, etc.

♡♥︎ Caste System: There is none. Well, no definitive caste system, anyway, though the people here do generally frown upon those who value commitment and romantic relationships as they see it as a waste of time and a boring inconvenience.

♥︎♡ Outside of the Lust Ring, while not as low as an imp or shark, the natives don't really get a lot of respect from others, especially from sinners due to being "easy sluts" in their eyes. Unless they have a substantial amount of wealth, are entertainers (i.e. Verosika), or are connected with royals or overlords in some personal way via concubine, business association, friendship, relationship (rare), then the status quo often won't change.

♡♥︎ Lifestyle: Since sex is easily the norme here, it's incorporated in everything from clothes, to food, to even the people's language in casual innuendos, so much so that they don't even realize it they're doing it nor do they care. The same can be said for hellborn children too, though (thankfully) they're far too young to understand it as "sexual" so much as "normal". The understanding steadily becomes more apparent the older they get, but they're not strongly affected by this.

♥︎♡ Also, going back to the "life-force draining ability", draining a soul via succubus sex, is one of the (many) ways sinners can physically wither away in Hell, toeing the horrific line between afterlife and true death. They become a literal blackened husk of their former souls, unable to feel the sweet release of death, exterminated or otherwise, and unable to quit their vices until then.

♡♥︎ Hellborn demons have more of a resilience to the "Sexy Soul-Sucking" method, as we'll call it, but if they go too hard they, unlike a sinner, will eventually succumb to a semi-quick death. The natives here generally go for Sinners when hungry, though, as they have sinful souls that are long-lasting and, thus, have more to offer.

♥︎♡ Now, you'd think that would ease some of the tension off the overpopulation issue if not for the fact that those who feed often tend to get pregnant immediately after, and healthcare in Hell is both near impossible and (as you'll see in the future) dangerous.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

《This procreation is possible in the event that a hellborn possesses a womb for the sinner's essence to procreate, but not the other way around, btw.》☝️🤓

•°○°•

Cast your votes, please! 😊

#helluva boss critical #vivziepop critical #helluva boss critique #helluva boss criticism #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #hazbin hotel critique #helluva critical #helluva boss rewrite #Skye Blue's 7 Sins

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kuiperblog · 1 month ago

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Running from the past

The pronghorn (known colloquially as the "American antelope" or "prairie antelope") is the fastest land mammal in North America, capable of reaching speeds of up to 55 miles per hour.

This makes it the world's second fastest land mammal, number 2 right behind the cheetah, which can surpass 60 miles per hour. But the cheetah is an ocean away in Africa: the pronghorn is #1 in North America, and by a long shot, placing far ahead of North American's second-place straggler, the coyote (which maxes out at around 40 mph.)

The pronghorn isn't just fast; it's needlessly fast. So why did it evolve a body capable of running 55 mph when there are no predators that come anywhere close to that speed?

The answer, it turns out, is that the pronghorn adapted to outrun a predator that no longer exists.

The Miracinonyx, colloquially known as the "American cheetah," is believed to have gone extinct around 12,000 years ago, near the end of the last Ice Age. The "American cheetah" died out in the same extinction event that's believed to have also killed off the woolly mammoth, saber-toothed cat, dire wolf, and giant ground sloth.

We can't know for certain how fast the American cheetah was, but it's widely speculated that it could reach speeds comparable to those of the present-day cheetah that we see in Africa.

The pronghorn's top speed of 55 mph was the culmination of an evolutionary journey that spans tens of millions of years, with the real push for speed coming in the last few million years during the Ice Age, when North America was home to faster predators.

The American cheetah and American antelope were part of an evolutionary arms race, with each doing its best to stay ahead of the other. And, with the need for speed, selection pressure forced both species to make tradeoffs: while the pronghorn is fast, and is great at running in straight lines, it's not agile. Part of this is basic physics and momentum, but part of it is also biological: the pronghorn has a muscle distribution which is concentrated in the parts of the hindquarters that generate forward propulsion, but not the parts that would allow for more lateral movement. The pronghorn also has a more rigid spine compared to other prey animals, like the white-tailed deer.

While animals like deer can't run faster than around 30 mph, they have a more "spring-like" anatomy that makes it easier for them to make rapid changes in direction.

And the speedy longhorn, like the cheetah, has a big problem with endurance. It has a high top speed, but can only maintain it for short bursts.

In short, the pronghorn is paying a lot of costs for a biological advantage that is no longer relevant. It evolved to outrun a threat that no longer exists.

I think that there is perhaps a metaphor in that.

There's a scene in American Gods that could perhaps be seen as a meditation on why prison has such a high recidivism rate:

Johnnie Larch had got to the airport, and he handed his ticket to the woman on the counter, and she asked to see his driver's license. He showed it to her. It had expired a couple of years earlier. She told him it was not valid as ID. He told her it might not be valid as a driver's license, but it sure as hell was fine identification, and it had a photo of him on it, and his height and his weight, and damn it, who else did she think he was, if he wasn't him? She said she'd thank him to keep his voice down. He told her to give him a f---ing boarding pass, or she was going to regret it, and that he wasn't going to be disrespected. You don't let people disrespect you in prison. Then she pressed a button, and a few moments later the airport security showed up, and they tried to persuade Johnnie Larch to leave the airport quietly, and he did not wish to leave, and there was something of an altercation.

The conclusion that his fellow inmate comes to based on this anecdote is that the "kinds of behavior that work in a specialized environment, such as a prison, can fail to work and in fact become harmful when used outside such an environment."

This generalizes beyond prisons, of course: there are behaviors that someone might develop to survive in a abusive household, or academic setting, or a toxic workplace, or a Pleistocene Ice Age. Those survival strategies might be useful or even necessary to survive in that environment.

But years pass, and later in life, those survival strategies might end up outliving their usefulness, persisting into the present even though they were developed years ago to outrun a threat that no longer exists.

#retro journal #evolutionary biology #biology #pronghorn

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alexeeeeeeeeeee · 9 months ago

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Lesson One | Welcome to Devildom!

| 1 | Royal Academy of Diavolo

'Where am I...?'

…

In a dream.

Because there was no other reasonable explanation for the fact that Goh was currently standing dumbfounded in a huge medieval-looking courtroom, being stared at by several men claiming to be demons.

'Demons. Ha.'

Was this a joke? Was he high? Even though he didn’t remember ever taking that kind of substance in his short life, maybe the stifling air of his small room in the university residence had made him dizzy enough to hallucinate things...

''... though we just call it RAD. You're standing inside the assembly hall, the very heart of RAD. This is where we officers of the student council hold our meetings and conduct our business.''

'Officers of... the student council? Is this a school?'

Goh had barely registered one piece of information that ten others popped up and assailed him with nonsense. A demon realm? A prince? What was his name again? Diavolo? One of the other men present explaining to him that Goh had been summoned into the Devildom as an exchange student aiming to complete an exchange program between a Celestial Realm and the human world? A man who actually happened to be Lucifer, Avatar of Pride?

'What the... Wait no, don't come any closer!... Stop talking already... A YEAR!?'

Oh, and now Lucifer (?) was handing him what looked an awful lot like an iPhone − a... D.D.D.? − and was informing him that it would be used to communicate with them and to invoke magic cards via a magic virtual book that would allow him to fight against other demons to strengthen his soul.

'Please, Goh, just wake up already... all this seems way to lucid for me to be reassured that nothing's real.'

...

Looked after by the Avatar of Greed, Lucifer's (?) brother?

Why didn't it sound promising?...

| 2 | The Seven Brothers

''So, what business does a human got with THE Mammon?''

''You'll... apparently be in charge of me from now on.''

''No way! There's nothin' in it for me.''

Great.

So one of the little brothers of Lucifer (?) had already some beef against him because his older brother obliged him to take care of the human.

The three other men in the courtroom were apparently also siblings of Lucifer (?), the gorgeous champagne-haired being the Avatar of Lust, Asmodeus (?); the passive-aggressive blond, the Avatar of Wrath, Satan (?); the giant and hungry redhead, the Avatar of Gluttony, Beelzebub (?).

'Aren’t Lucifer and Satan supposed to be the same being? Also, those Avatar Lords seem to embody the seven deadly sins, which means there must be two other brothers for envy and sloth…'

Goh had a really hard time trying to correctly understand the situation, and he was still not completly sure whether all this circus was reality, but since taking the phone − the D.D.D. −, he had this uncomfortable feeling that he might not be dreaming.

After all, the device felt pretty real to him.

Heavy, even.

As the presence of the five men (?) around him. He didn't feel extremely safe with them near him, even though Diavolo said that the brothers were going to protect him of potential demons disagreeing with the prince who might try something against him to screw things up.

Thus, Goh would have to live with them in the House of Lamentation.

And thus, Goh needed to collect as much informations as he could. Because if this interdimensional exchange program was his new life − for a whole year −, he needed to be prepared.

Had to be prepared.

Otherwise, there was a possibility that he could never be able to return to his normal life.

And maybe that the courtroom door presently opening would be one of the first danger that he would need to be aware of.

| 3 | Mammon, Avatar of Greed

Goh was so screwed.

He was definitely not dreaming.

The rush of fear that he felt as Mammon approched him and grabbed his shirt before ordering to give him all his money was way to real to only be a construction of his imagination.

Goh tried hard not to show any emotion, like he'd been doing since he'd become aware of his surroundings, as the tan-skinned and silver-haired demon was threatening to eat him right in front of his face, but it was a bit difficult when a fiery blue-green gaze and a hot breath were assailing him.

He got even more convinced that all what was happening was reality when Lucifer hit Mammon hard enough to let go and to cause him and the human he has been holding to stumble a few steps from the shock of the impact.

At this, Goh couldn't help but surreptitiously widen his eyes, momentarily stunned by the raw strength the demon was capable of displaying.

'I'm going to die. Protected? Hell, those brothers will be the cause of my death!'

Even though he had just been kind of attacked − technically, the demon hadn’t touch him −, the human felt a little confused when Satan revealed that Mammon really only cared about the money of someone, not the someone in question, because the bad feeling that was swarming tirelessly in the depths of his gut seemed to lighten a little when Goh's shaken mind had witnessed Mammon's reaction to Asmodeus' derogatory remark : the Avatar of Greed hadn't respond by making use of this threatening aura that Lucifer and Satan had released a little earlier when the latter was presented.

Even though the silver-haired demon obviously cared a lot about money − Satan called it ''grimm'', right? −, the human was able to perceive that he was also capable of restraint.

From the way Mammon's brothers − minus Beelzebub − insulted him without flinching, Goh deduced that this was the usual way of treating the second eldest.

Second eldest who, if one followed a logic of power scale, must have been the second strongest of the siblings, just after Lucifer.

At second glance, Mammon appeared to be a free spirit, thus explaining why he didn't look eager to personally take care of Goh during his stay in the Devildom, but maybe he was really not the worst protector that could be.

'I guess he looks more reasonable and sincere than Satan, Asmodeus or Lucifer... As for Beelzebub, I think that if I don't touch his food, he should leave me alone. Maybe I can survive this... I just have to not get involved in things that don't concern me and I should be fine. I think... I hope.'

''Alright, human, listen up. As much as I don't want to look after you, I've got no choice. So in return, you better make sure you don't cause me any trouble, got it?''

A bit calmer than five minutes ago, Goh took a few seconds to size up his interlocutor, the demon's blue-green eyes glinting mostly with annoyance and resignation, but also with a spark that he could describe as curiosity.

Relaxing his imperturbable expression a little, Goh nodded, thus sealing their future collaboration.

| 4 | Good Luck

''Humans, angels, demons, I imagine a universe where each accepts the other. Where we are brought together as friends. This is my dream, and I'm asking you to be the foundation for it.''

'Talking about an utopia...'

It wasn't like Goh was mad at them for kidnapping him without any warning only to throw him into this whole new and dangerous world, no : he was just internally furious and worried and so, so lost.

He was just a random university student, with common short and messy brown hair and even more common chocolate brown eyes. He wasn't tall, nor was he small, he wasn't particularly fit − just the right healthy shape to make his body work.

He was a nobody amongst nobodies.

Not even thirty minutes ago, he had been in his campus dorm, reading an anthropology book while trying to not suffocate from the late summer heat − nothing that was most normal and banal in his eyes.

But now...

The human let out a soft, tired sigh, a certain weight hunching his shoulders forward as Mammon guided him out of the room.

Even when he was little, Hugo Yatsurugi had never been the type of boy who believed in fairy tales or monsters under the bed. No, he had always been a down-to-earth, very curious child.

The mysteries of the world had fascinated him for a long time now, and it was human beings that had particularly caught his attention.

After all, what a strange creature this abstract life form was. Coming from the hominid family, humans had progressed from primate to the modern individual that they now boast of having reached in approximately seven million years. A lot of work and transformations to proclaim themselves master of the Earth.

Younger, the brunette had always wondered how the human mind developed and how it was really made. It was his curiosity about psychology and anthropological behavior that led him to study history and observe people. This was how he discovered his ''passion''.

Analyze, decode, then try to help if he could.

Neither Goh nor those around him understood why he had fallen for such a hobby. After all, as a kid, he hadn't been the most sociable of the classes he had been through, content to stay away.

But he seemed to always have had a soft spot for human beings in general. Even though the young man knew full well that the world he lived in was doomed to destruction because of human impetuosity and stupidity, he wanted to be able to relieve his specie of the scourge with which it had burdened itself.

As a human himself, Goh had come to believe that nothing and no one could dethrone the superpredator that they were. Obviously, he'd been wrong all along. Angels and demons now had to be added to the balance.

And this reversal of forces changed absolutely everything.

Especially for someone as realist as Goh.

As the human was crossing a paved street, he took advantage of the fact that Mammon was walking a few steps ahead grumbling under his breath, to allow genuine surprise to appear on his face when a bracelet adorned with a pendant representing Capricorn came to life with a will of his own and wanted to follow him, simply held back by the turnstile on which it was attached.

When the brunette was suddenly called − summoned? − to the council room of RAD, he felt immensely scared and confused, thinking he was going crazy.

Now, he just felt concerned, anxious.

And the fact that he only felt like that not even an hour after this whole traumatic experience and discovery destabilised him even more.

Taking his eyes off the rustic decor of the shops and restaurants − taverns? − of the Devildom, Goh let his blunt gaze land on the demon before him and frowned softly as his heart skipped an uneasy beat.

'Why does it feel like a... déjà-vu?'

| 5 | The House of Lamentation

Goh expected that the residence of the seven brothers would be able to accommodate him and them, but he didn't think that the house would actually be a mansion.

Huge, noble and austere, the old building seemed to have two floors, although the human managed to distinguish a third which must served as an attic. Several lights were on, informing the brunette of the presence of someone inside. Probably the two brothers who had not been present during the small welcome assembly.

''That rotten bastard... Does he really think he can scare me into doin' whatever he wants?''

'Ah, so he was complaining all along...'

Mammon suddenly turned around, almost making the young man who was following him trip.

''Just so we're clear... it's not like I can't say no to Lucifer, okay? I only agreed to babysit you because, um... Well you know, because... uh...''

'Because...?'

''Anyway, it doesn't matter! Just don't go thinking that I'm scared of Lucifer or anything! Because I'm not!''

''I know.''

It wasn't the first time the student had faced people like the Avatar of Greed, those who turned a blind eye and said the complete opposite of what they thought to keep face. The best way to ensure that a conversation went well with this type of person was to go their way.

Delighted that their interlocutor was of the same opinion, they would automatically be more at ease.

''... Oh. Okay then, as long as we've got that straight.''

Goh was treated to a discreet glance that he could have missed if he hadn't been so attentive and observant by nature. Just after, Mammon turned around and pulled down the handle of the large double doors.

''... Ugh, whatever. Let's move on.''

An imperceptible smile stretched Goh's lips for the first time since he was in the Devildom. He was happy to have managed to understand part of the behavior of his protector in such a short time.

It could be useful to him later.

Following the demon and leaving the darkness of the night for the light of the residence, astonishment quickly took place on the young man's face as the entrance hall presented itself to him.

Listening absently to Mammon while detailing the place, he learned that the House of Lamentation was actually a dormitory reserved for members of the student council − minus Diavolo, who had his own castle − and that others like it existed all around RAD. From what the human understood, the student council acted as a sort of Congress.

As to whether the power of Diavolo and the brothers extended beyond the academy, the brunette suspected that it was the case, if only with the title of crown prince of Diavolo.

'Which means that these guys are really big shots here...'

''Hey, don't just stand there with you jaw open. Hurry up, or I'm gonna leave ya behind.''

The student noticed with surprise that his inspection of the entrance hall had absorbed him more than he would have expected, Mammon having had time to start taking the corridor which led to the rest of the ground floor.

It's while joining him at a small trot that Goh's chocolate eyes were attracted by a bulletin board where several sheets of part-time job offers were pinned.

''If there's something you wanna ask me, you'd best do it now.''

''What are your hobbies?''

The young man wanted to see if the question would destabilize him. Testing his reactions was a good way to establish the limits that should not be crossed to avoid really annoying him by accident. In addition, it would allow him to better understand the character who would serve as his bodyguard for the coming year.

''Hobbies? Pff, I don't have any... Wait, how about this : I like taking it easy, laughing, and having fun! That's my hobby! Eh, though I guess that's more like a 'lifestyle' than a hobby, huh?''

Maybe it was because of his cooperative reactions, but the human didn't expected the tan-skinned demon to be this easy to talk to.

At first glance, the brunette only saw the snappish character of the Avatar Lord − the fact that his first gesture was to grab him by the collar perhaps had something to do with it −, but when Mammon appeared comfortable in a situation, it seemed easier for him to express his true feelings.

''Anyway, I was actually asking if you had questions about life here at the dorm. I don't get why you wanna talk about me...''

'I don't know when I'll be able to know more about you, or if I'll be able to. I can learn about the Devildom whenever I want.'

''But I'm gonna give you a piece of advice, so listen up.''

The silver-haired stopped moving forward and Goh had all the difficulty in the world to stop to avoid hitting him. His chocolate irises were suddenly anchored in the blue-green eyes of his interlocutor and the serious and harsh look that the demon gave him made him swallow in spite of himself.

Their involuntary proximity already made him insecure, and the fact that Mammon began to tap his chest with his index finger, as one did when one wanted to threaten someone, did not help to calm his growing anxiety.

''If you wanna survive even a day here in the Devildom, you'd better listen real close to what I'm about to say. If it ever looks like a demon is about to attack you... run away.''

Lowering his arm, the Avatar of Greed turned again to resume walking, apparently not noticing the stress he had just put the human through.

''Either that, or die.''

Slightly frowning, the brunette couldn't help but think that this advice was worth gold.

Of course, here, he was just a weak human at the mercy of an entire country filled with seemingly man-eating demons.

No way he would do otherwise.

''How about this? I vote for you to die, Mammon.''

'... Huh?'

| 6 | Leviathan, Avatar of Envy

COMING SOON...

| 7 | The Tale of the Seven Lords

COMING SOON...

__________________ 🕯 __________________

#obey me #obey me devildom #obey me mammon #obey me lucifer #obey me diavolo #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me beelzebub #obey me leviathan #original character #season 1

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mittensmorgul · 1 year ago

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so today is my kid’s 23rd birthday, so we went down to dc to see the sights and take in a few museums (kid’s choice). this was probably our first mistake. it was over 100f out there today. meltin’ weather!

we went right for the air and space museum because we love that place, but it’s still having major renovations done and we didn’t realize you need a TIMED ADMISSION PASS to get in right now. they were all gone for today. so we didn’t go in.

so we went across the mall to the national gallery of art. which is also undergoing extensive renovations and it would’ve been nice to know the main entrance was closed before we hiked down there only to find we had to hike back to the opposite end of the massive building in the 100 degree heat. but we made it. i got to see dali’s sacrament of the last supper, hieronymus bosch’s death and the miser, assorted rembrandts, and the only painting by leonardo da vinci in north america. always fun! but we were hungry, and in our hunger half our group was confused about our plans. this led to miscommunication that led to half our group not realizing we’d gone for lunch. oops. eventually everyone ate, and we decided collectively to head toward the natural history museum.

the natural history museum was... really crowded. as expected. but it was also getting on everyone’s last nerves. so we decided to skip the american history museum and just start for home and relaxation.

so we hiked back to the metro, waited for the train, made it about halfway back when they started holding us for an extra two minutes at every stop. fine, weird, but not too bad yet.

and then we hit the Medical Center station between NIH and the Naval Hospital... i used to work there, and forgot how long that escalator is lol, but i got a refresher on it today. Because they stopped the train and were like OKAY EVERYONE OUT WE CAN’T GO ANY FURTHER BECAUSE THE TRACK IS ON FIRE AHEAD.

THE TRACK. WAS ON FIRE.

this is how hot it was today.

like you could smell the weird burning smell in the station tunnel. this led (with a full early rush-hour crowd on the train) to Mass Confusion. Wait why are we getting off here? Where do we go now? Apparently where we went was onto busses that ferried us two train stations further up the line where we could get on a train again.

And those busses were running through... DC rush hour traffic! which meant the two station jaunt that would’ve taken 5 minutes on the train took half an hour! but again, i got to see the old stomping grounds a bit, so annoying as it was, it wasn’t horrific.

We finally got off, found our car, and headed into the final leg of our journey home. Through rush hour traffic! And a thunderstorm that apparently knocked down some trees! and an accident that closed all but one lane on the expressway!

but at least it’s now 30 degrees cooler, and i’m finally home again. i didn’t even get a new picture of myself with my favorite giant ground sloth skeleton. :(

But i had a delicious quiche lorraine in the sculpture garden cafe and got a really superb photo of mr mittens eating a sandwich, so have that i guess :’D

hopefully i won’t have to leave the house at all tomorrow...

#my life as a muppet #story time

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helluva-world-innit · 9 months ago

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Late to the party but finally making an entrance is Envy Ring!

I'm sure you can see similarities between it and Greed which Levi is less than pleased about. Mammon swears he's just trying to give Hell's denizens a lively, entertaining place to spend their Souls/jewels and exploit their Sinners, not copying Envy's bright and alluring aesthetic. To be fair to him, Envy's light is largely bioluminescence whereas Greed must rely on the soul energy that flows into and around Hell from Sloth Ring (we'll get to that house of horrors when we get there). As such, Envy and Wrath Rings are the only ones to have natural light (biolum and lava). Go figure. Green is the main color here though it's not allowing me to photograph it properly. The windows in the palace are actually light green, not white. My gel pens did not want to cooperate and I think I gave up at that point too. Anyhoo, coral reefs were defs an inspiration for this place. As well as the deep sea and fish just being fish.

As is the case in the open Earth ocean...everything in Envy can and will fucking kill you (yes, that is a giant crab). From the flora to the fauna to the fucking ROCKS to the crushing pressure and scathing shade thrown by the Ringmaster or their Overseers, Delta and Ray, everything is designed to leave you bleeding for the sharks here. Even the few landmasses that dot the massive Ring aren't safe. Above the waves live horse-sized creatures that look like pelicans under an x-ray machine. The bone skimmers, as they are known, are notorious for attacking and eating any demons that come too far up to the surface. The rare tourist spot or transport station above the water have to have hounds patrolling around the clock to keep the hellish birds at bay. Naturally, everything is more expensive in Envy proper, where only those who can breathe the sulfuric water of Hell may dwell for any length of time. It is a place of privilege, beauty, and attitude. All of which has been cultivated by its Ringmaster, Leviathan (that big ol' tentacled thing by the palace? that's him playing peekaboo; like an iceberg, we just see the tip).

There is a natural current of soul energy that courses through Envy (crevice, bottom left-ish). Here is where many of the higher echelon of Envy live and work since it's a well-spring of power and very bright here. Named the Ring of Influence, it runs around the entire Ring like a smaller separate ring of Hell itself. The Ars Goetia who live here may as well be gods the lower hellborn are always vying for the attention of and Sinners know no peace if they happen to become entangled in the tendrils of this privileged and isolated kingdom. They form an entirely unique enslaved underclass here and Envy is the biggest generator of Broken Sinners in Hell as a result (we'll get to the Broken later too). The housing and such you can see in the background up there are where the middle-class worker bees live mostly. Also the occasional poor Hellborn or Sinner that would rather die (again?) than fall into the Ring of Influence where life could very well be worse for them depending who gobbles them up. It's like whalefall, I guess.

Now, the tubes. So Hell's got these elevators, right? Hell-evators, if you will. Well, most Rings hide or blend them in to the environment. Not Envy Ring. Demons can see exactly what part of Envy Ring they're traveling to or through thanks to the reinforced glass of the Hell-evators here. Naughty demons even break them sometimes as illustrated above. They have the tech to build a new one and do so, no problem. The general mindset here is 'yeah, we know you want what we have but you could never pull it off like us so die mad' even if every Envy citizen is a literal fish out of water in any other Ring they might travel to. Sure, they're someone that matters there, but would anyone in Gluttony give a shit? Or Pride? Hard to say.

Leviathan is cold, calculating and about the only being stronger than Lucifer in Hell. What stops these two from coming to blows like how Satan and Luci did all those millennia ago to decide who would rule Hell is Levi likes being behind the scenes. Anything that keeps God's attention off them and the prophecy to kill them and serve them up like sashimi to humanity is *chef's kiss*. While they question the decisions their king makes, they still have a frightful amount of respect and love for Lucifer and Satan...just not really anyone else. Including Charlie. Especially not Asmodeus, who is the youngest of the Sins by far.

Notable characters from this Ring are Nifty, Chaz and his family, Verosika, Alessio/the majority of Crimson's gang still, and Baxter. The Overseers of this Ring are the aforementioned eel twins, Delta and Ray. Also planning on doing a map view of this Ring later so I can paint a better picture of where everything is in relation to each other.

Up Next (though who knows when): Sloth Ring!

#hazbin hotel critical #hazbin redesign #helluva boss critical #helluva redesign #jack is wording again #7 levels of wtf #animals

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commenter2 · 1 year ago

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“Queen Bee” review

After a long delay, we finally get to watch the last episode of Helluva Boss season 1. Let’s see what happens.

No warning disclaimer! I wonder if this means the episode will be less inappropriate…XD

The episode IS in the Gluttony ring. That makes 6 rings we have seen so far in the series, 5.5 if you don't count the Sloth ring's first appearance. The only ring left is Envy and I personally can’t think of a reason for the Helluva Boss cast to go there, unless Crimson has a base of operations, or safe house there since he does hire a lot of sharks. It's likely we’ll see it during Hazbin Hotel when we see the von Eldritch family. I can imagine an episode cutting to their house where Helsa thinks of a new plan to annoy Charlie.

I like how the sky has the hexagon pattern making the whole place seem like a giant beehive, it’s pretty cool.

That Dalmatian Hellhound looks familiar. Is this another Disney reference, and why it took so long for this episode to come out?

I’m hoping that rude Hellhound isn’t Tex’s girlfriend, as I got another idea for his girlfriend.

After double checking something on the wiki, I now notice that the Dalmation and the one next to her look like Vaggie and Velvette! Heck I think the red Hellhound has a bit of Mrs. Mayberry's human form in her design. I mean I can see Mayberry wearing a similar outfit like that.

If bitch is a bad word to say to Hellhounds, does that mean its bad for my OC to call Fredrick and Bethesda "Squidward" and "Ursula"? I mean he hates them anyway but still.

THATS Beelzebub?!?! I was NOT expecting her to be a hellhound with insect traits, which admittedly is kind of interesting. I also like how she looks like Jay Jay, one Vivzie’s oldest characters.

I don’t think that’s normal cotton candy, and as the song went on I saw as it looks like those that eat her food look like they are under some kind of control. Maybe that’s how she gets “drones” for her hive and she gets them to get her “honey”.

2nd Disney reference, and after all this times I realize that's its odd seeing this be done by a canine instead of a feline. Still cool.

Was Beelzebub’s statement supposed to be a “Inside every demon is a rainbow” joke?

Along with confirming that Belphegor is female, we find out she is a good source of drugs and after seeing all the doctors in the Sloth Ring, its likely cause she is a doctor with a drug habit.

Originally I had this headcanon of Leviathan being the young, immature one of the sins but now I feel like Bee (as I'll call her) might fit that role as she is giving off that vibe. Luckily I have a backup personality for Leviathan of him being a Hulk/animalistic like person.

Not the biggest fan of Bee being Tex’s girlfriend. I was kind of hoping for that pink poodle hellhound Vivzie posted some time ago as I like the idea of Tex being with someone that is the opposite of Loona. Now with what Bee said about Satan, its likely they will break up so who knows, though I’m not that big of a fan of Tex and Loona. Thinking about it more, I do like how it’s another relationship similar to Blitzo and Stolas and Ozzie and Fizz, heck maybe later in the series she will support their relationships and maybe help Ozzie realize they are perfect together after he and Fizz got into some drama, same with Blitzo and Stolas later on.

Ignoring the NSFW stuff, it does seem like the sins treat each other like a kind of family. Going back to the NSFW stuff, if Bee felt that way for Satan then my sub-headcanon about Ozzie and Satan having romantic history is one step closer of actually becoming a real thing.

Seeing that dog with a X eyepatch makes me wonder if that’s just a popular eyepatch style in Hell, like demons and sinners who wear it are mocking the Exorcist. I’d be okay if that was true but please let Vaggie be an exception, as I still like the idea of her being a former Exorcist.

(sees sad Blitzo look at phone and immediately goes to get Loona) now that’s a man who would do anything for his daughter.

That Imp being nice to Blitzo seem to show that there are people out there besides the main cast that do care for him, but he just doesn’t notice. Then again with people like Fizz and Barbie hating you, I think love of friends isn’t enough for Blitzo. It also strangely kind of reminds me of that scene/meme from Meet the Robinsons.

Hell is the only place where having your parent attend the same party that you are also attending can actually be a good thing.

It’s interesting seeing a sin show respect for an Imp, especially Blitzo. I wonder if it’s related to how Hellhounds and Imps are in the same spot of Hell’s hierarchy, and since Bee is the queen of Hellhounds is why she respects both races.

That face Bee made can’t be good.

I recall there being rehab centers in Hell, and after seeing Bee showing concerned about Blitzo, seems to confirm that she is likely behind them. It is nice seeing that though she is a party girl, she does see the downsides to that lifestyle and is willing to help other with those destructive tendencies. I wonder if it would be the same with Satan helping those with anger problems, as that’s another headcanon of mine.

Though I don’t think we saw the full transformation, I’m kind of disappointed that Bee’s demon form isn’t an actual Bee.

I think I see a new pic of Barbie on the wall at Blitzo’s place. Like the others Blitzo is marked out of it.

Of course when Loona calls Blitzo’s dad, he doesn’t respond.

This was a really good Loona centered episode, and a much better ending to season 1 compared to episode 7.

Like always I liked the world building and the character development and interactions, heck Beelzebub became much more rounded as the episode went on which I loved and now I hope to see her again soon somehow.

The only problem I have with the episode is Beelzebub not being an actual Bee as I had some fun ideas about that, both related to the series and for fun pics which I probably won’t post for some now given the new info but who knows.

Again this was a great episode that was worth the wait, and I’m also glad that the next episode is also coming out soon, hopefully next weekend.

What were your thoughts on the episode?

#hazbin hotel #helluva boss #helluva boss loona #vivziepop #helluva boss tex #helluva boss blitzo #helluva boss beelzebub

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the-firebird69 · 6 months ago

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Thor vs The Frost Giants - Battle of Jotunheim (Scene) - Thor (2011) Mov...

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And they come back after he tells him he knows and they come back over and over and they blew it and they got sick and mean for one reason or the other they did the job and they can go away now they forced our son into it was very evil intent for our people we don't want to hear from you. This battle looks horrible but it's really not. Only few of them get killed the rest of them get hit by something recovered it's probably like two of them that got killed and one from the fall and one from hitting the head by the hammer and the rest recover but the point is that they find out where they are and what they're up to and they're both there are modus operandi and did they had tech and more some kind of monster it looks like a giant sloth and looks like the max we're using them is there blue and they're in the cold and they're son is the analogy 2 hours is some sort of massively powerful giant sloth and it's an oxymoron and it's not worth putting up but that's what they do this is mostly Wills side andThey get devastated by these idiots and those two are rebels and these people are idiots we don't want them around here they don't work with people who are rebels they're just these rogue idiots and they ruin those two too it pestering them and bothering her son with them. And now they just want stuff threatening her son those two guys and the two jackasses here they're somehow addicted and Bill got stupid. Our son's mom is deteriorating and it's pretty soon she will be absolutely useless. These people were helping your son and now they can't help themselves and are obsessing and doing things are evil to him and we would like afford it we won't allow it. I said it too whatever this sphere fleet is it's not supporting him and that means it's not supporting Biden or Camilla either and these people are at him and it's disgusting and we have to do some work.

Big Joe is a huge a****** and still is and was harassing ken and it doesn't get it I mean these people are now stupid people. He does the engineering is pretty good so does Preston the macs started protecting them and they should be then they're screwed they're really hardly protecting their son and all. Hey listen to crap a long time ago and you know it they know it and the max are approaching it they're getting sick and it's going to be us against them shortly and it'll be easier to pick them off and I'm going to act like these wrestlers they're nuts.

-we're going to see what happens to Big Joe but up there Preston has his forces in this center the other ones are getting defeated in combat and for some reason you're using hand to hand practically usually means there's something explosive nearby

I'm happy to see them go it's been a long time putting up with them and they're whining and complaining and begging and threats little babies and they should have been Parents. I've seen our son and daughter do things that are more adult than those two every day of their lives all day and fantastically huge things and that are massively adult. Then the wrong side and then they're evil and now they're spent an evil and threading your son only and society we don't need that

Good riddance to you both

Thor Freya

And now you'll die thankfully it's sick of you it's good of you to notice our son is going to help somehow get out of some trouble and we know what you're talking about you don't know anything about Giants you should but your idiots now. You see him getting out of something and you're going to pay you're such a jerks to him you're such jerks he says you could have gotten so much out of doing something that the other way just for one day like ken instead you chose to die. He has a future he sees it everywhere and you have none both of you chose to just leave a whole bunch of the family decided that what we say is good reasons just so useless to begin with and then you're in the family and you want to be massively useless okay so people are doing it and that's not true

You live the special life people treated both you well and your abusive as hell on our son and we don't want to take it anymore you're going away and you're staying away and Bill is already away he's out doesn't even care it's a moron checked out didn't care his dad checked out and didn't care

On his death bed he says don't give him anything

Any meant because he's a selfish pig and he's mean. And I said it would have been easy to bring you back you're just a selfish pig. He looks as I mean it and she says no you're a fool and you're sick and he says you're sick and it needs to be rescued and you won't allow it she said this to him you're leaving me cuz you're mean but when you're not sick you're not mean. He pulled a little closer and says I'm always mean you just don't know it. This is not true you're accidentally because of these losers and he says this I've always made to you too it looks like I'm quiet cuz I'm nice but I'm not just nobody has to be like right inside or next to someone all the time and friendly as hell you like to be distant from everybody that's your deal we won't say that to Mom cuz you're lying that's something mom and says I love you anyways I can't help it I don't feel good she cries and says I know he's a good boy and they saw him die. His anxiety says I don't want to do this anymore you got to help him. He says what do you say it says you're going to this little ball thing and people are fighting over you forever and you just entombed. And he says this that sort of makes sense and she wasn't angry because she said you know I should be angry because you're going to take a break and he started to laugh a little so he had a plan to escape and from the incinerator and you can see it might have works he's a statue of these guys do that. But we know it really happened he didn't make it and we held them for a long time and it was too long. He's always threatening your boy has too much and there's too many people doing it and he couldn't stand it and dee knew it that he died. My son said to her one day in space he didn't die he was killed he's made to let go and give up a little really had no choice they all forced him out and it's all a bunch pigs and you're useless and it was most of the max. These people know what their status and situation is they just react badly like he would do to me constantly they're doing it to you that's what they do to people are normal or valuable so his mom gets scared I said what are you telling me he didn't die he was murdered he didn't want to lose you to feel the time if he died he did not want to leave you and she smiled and said that's it then and that's what you wanted to say so she went around for a few days confused about it no she know what you meant. He left angry with who is who wouldn't. He was threatening him all the time he was sick and couldn't get healed we didn't have to stop and he wouldn't leave and he wouldn't take a break like these idiots and it needs to be called off now Big Joe is going to be called off and we're going to show that

Zig Zag

He said was the top part but then I said this huge part of the bottom I know he didn't fall asleep I thought this has been very annoying to us and those two were horrendous at the house it was you who turned it around and we know it and you said I'm going to use them cuz they won't stop abusing me and it went from this cheap threat and I found themselves at the top of the whole thing pushing huge crowds around and you were doing it and they're going to get hit for it cuz they know what you're talking about and what we're talking about

Thor Freya

Olympus

#Youtube

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arminreindl · 7 months ago

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So this one was an absolute blast (and sometimes pain) to research in preparation for the stream and I love how Josch's piece came out.

And so that all that info isn't just hidden away I'll break this one down beyond the croc stuff. Big part of this was defining what would be used, which brings the often overlooked but important distinction between the Pebas Megawetlands as a whole and the Pebas Formation in particular. Obviously the latter was used for this piece, which largely removed other fossil localities like Fitzcarrald and most importantly La Venta of the Honda Group from the resource pool (La Venta being well known for its mammal fossils), but despite this there was still a lot of ground to cover.

Starting with the crocs, the Pebas Formation might just be the formation with the single highest Cenozoic croc diversity. Sure in total theres more taxa in places like Urumaco, but in that case they are spread out across very different biomes. Meanwhile, all 7 Pebas crocodilians are known from the same localities. Of those 7, 4 are featured in the piece, covering most of the different morphotypes. The ones left out were Paleosuchus sp. (an extinct species of dwarf caiman), Kuttanacaiman and Caiman wannlangstoni (the latter two being ecologically too similar to one that is featured).

Images by Joschua Knüppe, Wann Langston, Andrzej Wolniewicz and yours truly.

The first one that obviously had to be included was Purussaurus neivensis. I wager most are familiar with Purussaurus at least by hearsay, generally as "one of the biggest crocodilians" and all those estimates upwards of 10 meter in length. Purussaurus neivensis however is the oldest species in this genus and as such as nowhere near as big and has a notably less boxy head. It was still big mind you, when I scaled it some years ago I still got a size of 6 to 7 meters, though a paper published after that proposed a more modest 5 to 4 meters. Multiple localities have yielded bones of this thing and the locality of Na 069 has sloth fossils that bear bitemarks likely attributed to P. neivensis.

Images by Josch, yours truly and Salas-Gismondi R. et al.

The second largest animal featured here is Gryposuchus pachakamue. Now as with Purussaurus, Gryposuchus is probably best known from its giant relatives like G. croizeti. Again the species encounted within the Pebas Formation is smaller and has some major anatomical differences, namely the fact that the eyes aren't telescoped. Quick context, if you look up the skull of modern gharials and derived Gryposuchus, you'll find that the rims of their eyes are raised, which elevetes the eyes. That's telescoping and not present in G. pachakamue. This might factor into habitat preferences and ecology. Telescope-eyed Gryposuchus are present in the Pebas Megawetlands, but do appear to stick to the edges and areas with flowing waters, like rivers, whereas G. pachakamue was found deeper in the oxygen-poor swamps. Another cool thing about this guy is that its the only crocodilian from the formation thats not a caiman, but a gharial. Long story short, gharials briefly colonized South America, thrived but sadly went extinct. Tho its possible that todays Indian Gharials are descendents of this South American radiation.

Artwork by Josch, skull reconstructions by Wann Langston, size comparisson by me

Third on our list is Mourasuchus atopus, which, I mean look at it. Mourasuchus takes us back to the caiman subfamily and it might just be the weirdest of the bunch. A flattened surfboard like head, highly telescoped eyes, lots of small teeth. These things are an enigma. Again the species present in this piece is on the smaller end of the spectrum and in general these animals are often way oversized in artwork and popular literature. The more interesting thing tho is their diet, which we still don't quite get. Theres been multiple hypothesis, including that it was a herbivore or that it waited with open jaws for fish to pass by. The hypothesis that has recieved the most attention is "filter feeding", tho the term is probably missleading as I'll explain. The idea is that Mourasuchus may have fed on small prey that could have hid in substrate or appeared in large numbers. Accordingly, it has often been depicted with a gullar pouch or similar to whales, largely based on a hypothesis erected for the unrelated Stomatosuchus, tho said hypothesis is not well supported either. Given that it lacks any obvious filter apparatus and may not have actually filtered anything, its perhaps more apt to describe it as a gulp feeder as used by Cidade et al. in their study. Which nicely leads into the name gulper caiman thats occasionally floated around.

Images by Joschua, Kevin Montalbán-Rivera and me

The final croc featured in this piece is Gnatusuchus (Nose Crocodile), the smallest of this selection at only around 1.5 meters long but not the smallest overall (that honour goes to the unnamed Paleosuchus species). Gnatusuchus represents the crusher morphotype. Basically, during this time period the wetlands had an incredibly diverse mollusc fauna with plenty of shellfish. These shellfish became prey to a variety of caimans that had blunt, globular teeth and generally shorter snouts. The afforementioned Kuttanacaiman and Caiman wannlangstoni both fall into this camp, but Gnatusuchus was probably the most extreme with its shovel-like skull and very round teeth. It is thought that they were the main predator of clams in the oxygen poor swamps, given that as air-breathers they didn't take issue to the water conditions in the same way that fish did.

Live reconstructions by Joschua, Paradracaena skull by Matt Borths, Pebasiconcha size by Ta-tea-two-te-to

Crocs out of the way lets move on to other reptiles with Paradracaena and its would-be prey that I'll just cover here for simplicity. Now Paradracaena is an extinct relative of today's Caiman lizards and tegus and a good example of where La Venta really comes to help. The skull featured above is from La Venta for example, but we do have less complete fossils of this animal from the Pebas Formation, after all they are located within the same wetland system. Paradracaena was large, larger than modern caiman lizards and tegus, yet this one overestimates just how big its prey is. Pebasiconcha is among the largest known terrestrial snails with a size of possibly up to 30 cm (25 at the least of it), larger than even today's giant african land snails.

More hidden is this one, Colombophis, a relative of today's false coral snake. Now problem is, I know little to none about this animal so I'm afraid I cannot provide that much information on it other than that it was widespread across the megawetlands and its successor systems during the Miocene.

Joschua Knüppe and the University of California Museum of Paleontology

The final reptile to be covered is this guy, Chelus colombiana aka the Giant Mata Mata. This is another one that I know less about than I like and its been on my list to research and write about for a while, but to keep it brief Chelus colombiana is a relative of the modern mata mata turtle that reached a shell length of upwards of 70 centimeter. Given that Mata Matas have stupidly long necks, the full animal would probably exceed a meter in length. If I get around to it I'll go on a deep dive in the future, but I'll make no promises.

People who follow my blog should be familiar with this animal, given I've written a summary on it shortly after it was described (shameless plug here). Several cool things about this guy come to mind. Not only is Pebanista the largest river dolphin we know (at least of those that are described), measuring 3.5 meters in length, but its also entirely unrelated to the river dolphins that inhabit the Amazon today. Instead, as one might guess from the name, Pebanista is most closely related to the genus Platanista, which includes the Ganges and Indus river dolphins of South Asia. This family used to be a lot more common during the Oligocene prior to the rise of orcas, sperm whales and real dolphins, and both our modern ones and Pebanista seem to have fled competition into areas further inland. In the back you can also see manatees. Better known from other regions of the wetlands, manatees are known from the Pebas Formation itself through ribs and teeth.

Moving on to the remaining mammal fauna. Again this is far from my expertise so I'll have to keep things relatively brief. First and most obvious we got the ground sloth, Magdalenabradys. Remember when I mentioned that we have caiman bite marks on some fossil remains, yeah its this guy. Which makes it all the better that in Josch's illustration the latter seems to sneak up on the former. Now when said bitemarks were described the sloth was identified as Pseudoprepotherium, but some digging by the other members of Paleostream has found that the Pebas specimens were later moved to the genus Magdalenabradys (hell the name of the type species even references how common this confusion is). Next to it you'll find Potamarchus, relatives of today's Pacarana and Josephoartigasia, the largest rodent ever. A more distant cousin to these guys is seen in the background next to Mourasuchus, Neoepiblema. THe morphology of the hindlimbs and pelvis suggest that they could have been digging or swimming animals, the latter seeming quite likely given the types of environments inhabited by them. And finally there's the glyptodont, specifically, bear with me, Parapropalaehoplophorus. Not making this up. Now a consistent theme with the Pebas Formation mammals is how little we know of them. Again, La Venta is easily the superior formation when it comes to mammal fossils, wheras the Pebas Formation proper mostly preserves fragments of taxa found in the former.

Fish I'll just keep to a quick footnote, having reached another area where I just know little about these animals to the point where I feel like without doing a proper deepdive I might just accidentally get something wrong. The most interesting might be the cow-nosed rays and the sawfish. Sawfish of course still inhabit the Amazon to this day, so perhaps this ones not so surprising. The cow-nosed ray stands out more, but several papers indicate the presence of either Myliobatis (the eagle ray) or Rhinoptera (the cownose ray). The latter ended up being chosen due to the work of Chabain et al., who also named three different species of Potamotrygon (bottom left next to Purussaurus), which are your typical South American river rays. The rest of the fish fauna here falls into your typical modern Amazonian fauna (Pacus, Plecos, Piranhas, Cichlids and various catfish) with Pogonias being the one outlier featured, as its closest kin are found in the Atlantic Ocean (tho they do occasionally venture into freshwater from what I could gather). In general there are some fossil fish from the formation that are either offshoots of lineages that are still marine to this day or early offshoots of groups that would eventually become fully freshwater, highlighting how these fish, much like the dolphins, took the opportunity presented by these enormous wetlands to expand into new habitats.

And thats all I have to say, thankfully I somehow managed to keep this under Tumblrs 30 picture limit.

Result from the Pebas formation #paleostream!

Not as diverse as some other places he have hit and yet, we weren't even able to put in all the crocs.

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ultraericthered · 1 year ago

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Anime Update V2 51

Tokyo Magnitude 8.0 - Have seen the next two episodes, and I’m noticing that Yuki getting lost from Mirai and Mirai having to call out his name seems to be a once an episode trend now, as are the aftershocks and tremors causing more random destruction and casualties, and the newscaster lady giving a report after every credits that clues you in on what’s to come in the next episode. Episode 4 was particularly notable, with Mirai’s petulant stubbornness giving me serious cringe (just use the portable disposable toilet already, girl!) as well as her continuing to be a terrible big sister to Yuki, a really gutwrenching scene with her and Yuki both sobbing over missing their home and parents, and oh yeah, Tokyo Tower falling down!

Hunter x Hunter - At last, the end of Greed Island. I was glad for Gon, Killua and Biscuit that they were able to achieve the win, am going to miss Biscuit if she’s really going to be away for a while, and damn, every new thing I hear about Ging really makes him come off more like a jerk. Getting a guy’s name wrong for a more convenient game title and not retracting it ‘cause you find it funny? Major dick!

Fruits Basket - Another solid episode for Yuki’s character growth. We found out that Machi is actually the younger half-sister of Kakeru and that she struggles with having independence. Yuki also got locked in a closet for a bit and had to conquer more painful memories of Akito’s abuse in that time. But by far the episode’s most important development is that Cinderella has been chosen as the play for the upcoming school festival, with the roles cast as such: Saki as Cinderella, Kyo as the Prince, Minami as the evil stepmother, Tohru as the evil stepsister, and Yuki as the Fairy Godmother. I. can’t. wait!

Re:ZERO - This is no doubt going to be an unpopular opinion but, aside from Subaru’s continuing character arc of mental and moral degradation, I’m not particularly liking this arc compared to the ones before it. It had such promise at the very start, but rather than maintain focus on what it started with - the different campaign camps of the Royal Selection - it’s veering in a different direction that seems intent on throwing as much bleak, miserable, mean-spirited and edgy shit at you as it can. And if it was working dramatically, I’d be more forgiving of it...but I didn’t get “drama” from this episode, I got unintentional comedy gold. The Witch’s Cult shows up and we meet a character named Betelgeuse (yes, like Beetlejuice) and not only is he just about the most Extra psychotic weirdo I’ve ever seen in anime, but how he’s set up in the plot as Subaru’s new arch enemy comes out of nowhere. He kills Rem and torments Subaru about his “sloth!” (and Rem’s sloth too since she’s gratuitously in love with Subaru but hasn’t really acted upon those feelings) sending Subaru into a mental breakdown where he’s all “RAAAWR I’LLKILLYOU, I’LLKILLYOU, I’LLFUCKINGKILLYOU!” and even screams his name: “BETEEEELGEUUUUUSE!” There’s just no way I could take this seriously. The actually effectively creepy part was the very end with all the snow and the outline of giant monster Puck appearing, and then the evil, furious look on Subaru after time has looped back.

Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Blade Works - Once again the part of the story where Shirou, Saber, Rin, and Archer face off against Ilya and Berseker for the first time, but this time with more details that the Deen anime left out such as Rin combating Ilya directly at one point, and there was even a scene of Kirei talking to Gilgamesh. Oh yes!

Symphogear GX - Another new start with another new enemy showing itself, this one being some creepy witch girl and her doll-like underlings who are after something from someone because they want to destroy the world. It’s not really clear yet, but I just loved seeing everyone again, especially with Kirika and Shirabe hanging with the main heroines now, and Maria doing her community service.

Eureka Seven - Finally got started on this, it’s been so long since I last saw any of this series, but Dai Sato, the head writer on it, is also the head writer of the currently running Pokemon Horizons, so the timing was serendipitous. Episode 1 spends a lot of time around Renton Thurston, a whiny 14 year old boy living in a small village who bitches about how much stuff in his life “sucks” but is also the son of a famed hero and who’s voiced in a very Tom Holland-ish sort of way by Johnny Yong Bosch (ironic since Holland is the first name of his idol), and some conflict with his grouchy old grandpa. It all changes when the Nirvash Type 0 shows up, piloted by a really weird girl with green hair and purple eyes named Eureka (pronounced EHUH-REK-UH), followed by Holland Novak’s crew in Gekko State and an assault from the United Federaton Military (which includes the cruel Captain Juergans and twerpy intel officer Dominic Sorel). So much is established within these two episodes I can’t recall it all off the top of my head, but damn does Sato’s strong writing make it fun!

Gintama - This episode took Gintoki and Katsura away from any of the other main characters as they’re roped into a temporary job that requires they crossdress and pass themselves off as women under new feminine identities. Yeah, one of those episodes, and easily the weakest to come out of this show at this point, though not without enjoyable moments. The plot with the ashamed son of the bigender owner of the place trying to prove himself a man led to something I had not been anticipating, and that in turn led to a laugh-out-loud ending joke. But for a cours concluder, they could’ve picked better.

AND

Oshi No Ko - For whatever reason, this anime was allowed to lead with a goddamn movie, one that despite its length is recommended viewing for determining whether or not this series is for you. And for me, it’d be a “nope!” Not because it was bad, I actually was quite engaged in it a good deal. But for a story with a premise this batshit crazy and totally ungrounded from the reality it’s depicting on-screen, it can only work if A: it’s a comedy, and B: Ai remains in the picture, as she’s the main selling point and the character with the most intrigue to her. Well, guess what happens at the end? It suddenly goes full “deep” and dramatic and serious, and it does so by having Ai get murdered at her home in front of her children by some rando stalker who may or may not have been brought there by the kids’ unknown father. Leading to a last minute swerve where Aquamarine vows to scour the entertainment industry for their father and whoever else might’ve had a hand in AI’s death, and get revenge! Yeah no, I think I’ll pass. I can see myself maybe checking back in with this every rare once in a while, but it’s not something I could get into.

#Anime Update V2 #Anime Update

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roonyxx · 2 years ago

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Winter Cabin (Y/n Pov)

By Jay-and-dean and Roonyxx

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Summary: Dean is tired and grumpy lately, maybe the magic of a winter cabin and love can make him relax ?

Warnings: Fluff and Smut. A hint of angst and adult language.

Note: this is our third collaboration

This is how it works:

We wrote the same story, and we did it together. I wrote Y/n’s Pov and @jay-and-dean wrote Dean’s Pov

We both worked as much on this story and it’s the result of both our brains but also both our hearts.

Please, if you want to show love for this story, don’t forget we were together in this.

Wordcount: 5089

READ DEAN’S POV HERE

Jay’s Masterlist

Roonyxx Masterlist

Y/N’S POV

When you asked Dean to get in the car you could see the hesitation about leaving his home in his eyes. You knew all he wanted was to lay down in his bed and rest, but you wanted to take him away from here and from all of it. You wanted to make him let go of everything for a while, and in a bunker filled with lore and laptops ready to ping at a new hunt that is impossible. But he agreed and got in the car with a tired frown.

Since then, he is grumpy. He has every right to be. The last few hunts were hard on him. That’s exactly why you planned this surprise, he will love it. His mood won’t bring yours down.

In the few hours you have been driving north, you can’t help but notice his watery eyes from all the yawning.

“You know I could have driven, Dean, right ?” You say as you bent a little forward to see his face.

“And risking damages on baby ?” a groan accentuated his words “No thank you.”

You let the snarky remark wash over you, but it still stings a little. It’s not like you have never driven the impala before but when Dean is grumpy, he tends to push you away a little. It’s all worth it, you’re going to smother him with love once you reach your destination.

“I do have my driving license” you say with a little smile to break the tension.

“Yes but the road is frozen, and she only listens to me” he says with a small smile, his way of trying to say sorry for his earlier remark.

Dean can be hard at times but he loves you uncontrollably, and he’ll never hurt you on purpose.

“Turn left” you say as you point towards the road on the left.

“I know my right and left” he grunts again, pushing your hand away.

“Maybe, but you have the reflexes of a sloth today” you mock him, his grumpy mood starting to pull on yours a little, you just really don’t want to drive the wrong way and risk getting lost, that would only worsen his already dampened mood. “So I prefer making sure.”

You won’t let him be mean to you, you can get really impressive when you’re angry. But you know Dean, you know him better then himself, you know a few ways to untie his panties.

After he turns left you start getting excited.

“We’re almost there” you look around the snowy landscape, everything sounds so much softer, the snow functioning as an isolation for the screams of the world. “Look at those giant pine trees covered in snow !” when you were little you always thought it looked like the trees had put on their winter coat.

You turn your head to the other side as you hear his monotone “Mh”

“Look at this lake !” it is huge and completely frozen, it’s beautiful, so beautiful it almost asks to be touched. “It’s like a giant mirror.”

Another gloomy “Mh” leaves his lips.

You know it is just because he is tired. But you are getting so close now, not even his uninterested grunts can ruin your mood.

You sit up on your knees on the bench seat, sometimes taking his face in your hands to show him something or to just give him a kiss on his temple in a protective way. You try to pull him into your enthusiasm, and whether it works or not, you will keep trying. You will keep giving all you have in you to make him smile again.

“Yes ! It’s there. Look !” You nearly scream when the cabin appears in the middle of the Tongass National Forest. Some old friends of yours own it and you asked them if you could ‘borrow’ it for a while. You were so happy when they agreed.

“Finally !” he breaths out as he parks the Impala in front of it.

You both take your bags out of the trunk, make your way inside and switch on the light. The atmosphere in the cabin is a lot warmer than the outside.

The cabin isn’t that big, it exists out of a living room, a small kitchen to the right side, one bedroom and bathroom upstairs, but you don’t need much space anyway.

Because of its smaller size it holds a cozy vibe. The cabin is entirely made out of wood with an exception to the stone fireplace. There is a smooth carpet where three large sofas are placed around the fireplace, you can count at least three, no four fluffy blankets spread around the couches with numerous pillows. The lights cast a soft amber color on everything, a harsh contrast from the stark white snow outside.

“Oh wow, where did you find this place ?” Dean wonders out loud.

“I have connections” you grin as you take his hand to pull him upstairs to unpack.

The bedroom is fairly small, the big bed takes up most of the space. But it has the fluffiest blankets and a ton of pillows to cuddle in. A string of fairy lights is connected to the ceiling.

Dean half moans at the sight of the bed and let himself drop in it. Your boyfriend is a big guy but even he looks tiny in this king size bed ! You laugh and drop next to him, putting your hand on his chest as you turn on your side and lean up on your elbow to watch the man you love.

“Do you like it ?” you ask him, stroking his broad chest.

“Yes, it’s cute” he says as his hand grasps yours on his chest and lifts it up to his mouth to kiss your knuckles. “Thank you, baby. I Think we both really needed a break” he says with a huffed breath.

“Yeah we did, we’re both tired, you more than me because you always insist on doing most of the work” you cup his cheek, your fingers enjoying the scratch from his scruff.

It has been a while since he shaved and you don’t mind it one bit, he looks even more handsome now.

“You go change into something comfier baby, I packed your robe and your hotdog pants, I’ll get the cocoa heated up downstairs, okay ?” You sit up and turn to him, his face lights up like a child on Christmas.

“You’re the best” he says with a smile “I’ll be right down to help you” he sits too and takes his bag to search for his clothes.

“No need, baby, I got it under control” you kiss his forehead and leave the room to go to the fridge.

Your friend told you to send a grocery list so she could fill up the fridge for you, she truly is an angel.

You are taking out the ingredients you need for your cocoa deluxe when you feel two strong arms wrap around your waist and a face nuzzle in your neck, giving you those sweet open mouth kisses only he has the secret.

“You didn’t have to do all of this baby, but still thank you. I already feel a little more relaxed” he whispers sweetly in your ear.

You arch one arm back to run your fingers through his soft hair.

“I know I didn’t have to but I wanted to do it” you say as you keep stirring the cocoa milk in the pot “Do you want marshmallows, cinnamon, whipped cream or sprinkles on yours ?” you turn your head to see a mischievous glint in his eyes that says exactly what he wants.

“Okay all of them it is” you chuckle as you stroke the arm around your waist “Get comfy on the sofa, I put a bag with Dr. Sexy MD DVD’s on the floor by the tv, you can choose which one you want to watch.”

He lets you go with one last kiss to your cheek.

“God I love you” he says making his way to the tv.

You pour the hot beverage in two enormous mugs, add the ingredients Dean wants and the same on yours. You put it on a tray with numerous snacks, walk towards the tv and put it on the little table.

Dean has just put in one of the disks as he sits down on one of the couches. You take a huge blanket and drape it over him, making sure you tuck the blanket under his feet and legs before handing him his hot cocoa. You take yours and carefully slip beneath the blanket and snuggle up to him.

“Are you comfy ?” you ask him.

“Very comfy baby” he wraps his arm around your shoulders and pulls you closer into him, then takes a sip from his drink.

When he looks up at you in a hum, you can’t hold in your laugh.

“What ?” he asks with a frown.

“You’ve got whipped cream on your nose” you say with a giggle.

At that, he turns both his eyes to his nose which only makes you laugh harder.

“Wait, let me help” you sit up a little higher to kiss the cream of his nose. “Mhh delicious.”

He’s chuckling softly when his eyes fall on the snack tray.

“Oh you got twizzlers !” He gasps “When I was little Sam and I used to do a competition of who could push it the furthest in their nose” he laughs.

“Oh my God, and you ate it afterwards ?” you ask him, he nods while laughing “Oh that’s disgusting!” you chuckle.

“Hey! You try to keep a seven years old entertained 24/7, you come up with some weird stuff!” he says with a smile.

You know Dean never had an easy childhood, he never got to be a child. At age four he was robbed from his innocence. He had to be a mother and a father for his little brother because his dad was being too busy with everything except his kids, you would never forgive John for doing that to Dean.

That’s why you often take him to go do silly things, like mini golf, or laser shooting, you bake pies with him and always start a food fight. You wanted to give him little pieces of childhood he never had…

Now, you look out the window and a new childish idea struck your mind.

You stand up and take his mug from his hands, putting it down on the table as you pull him up from the couch.

“Come on !” you say as you tug him to the back door.

“What are we doing ?” he asks but you don’t answer him already putting on your jacket, gloves and shoes, motioning to Dean to do the same.

Once you are both dressed you push him out the door, he stands there in the middle of the snow, his long robe peeking from under his jacket, he looks so cute.

“Why are we outsi-“ his sentence is cut off when you hit him with a snowball on his chest.

His face is priceless, somewhere between surprised and a faint smile. And your laugh echoes through the trees.

“Oh you’re in for it now !” he yells as he makes a snowball of his own and throws it at you.

Of course the skilled hunter hit his target : your boob. Your hand covers it.

“Hey! No booby shots!” you yell at him as he can’t stop laughing.

You make a new snowball and aim for his crotch. His hands cover his precious jewels quickly as he sees you aiming for it.

“Oh no need to get nasty sweetheart, you’ll be needing this body part later on” he says with a cocky grin.

“Okay, you’re right” you say and throw the snowball right in his face.

The snow is still pretty soft so you know it wouldn’t hurt.

He blinks rapidly, his eyelashes long enough to catch the snow beautifully. He wipes his face and runs at high speed towards you, the dangerous warrior he also is suddenly showing. You start to run but you are no match for his long powerful legs…

He catches you and throws you over his shoulder, his hand spanking your butt. You’re laughing uncontrollably on his shoulder.

“Hahahaha ! And you always say I can’t throw !” you say in between laughs, now and then yelping when his hand connects with your ass cheek.

He walks toward a snow covered tree and turns with his back to it to rub you between the branches of the tree, making all the snow tumble down.

“Aaaahh Deaaaaan !” you shriek as the snow falls on you, you reach with your hands forward to catch some snow and rub it all over his head. “Karma !” you yell when he jumps away from the tree and puts you down.

“It got in my coat !” he chuckles loudly, shaking his body and arching his back to try avoid the cold from the snow.

You shake your own coat too and feel a lump snow slip in your collar.

“AH oh me too! Abort mission! Go inside !” you are laughing hard.

You run back with Dean inside the cabin, taking off your coats, gloves and shoes. You shiver and rub your own arms up and down.

“I’ll get the fire started baby, take off your wet clothes if you wanna speed up the process” He winks as he makes his way to the fireplace. You follow him and throw a blanket over his shoulders.

You check the mugs you left before on the little table, smiling when you find them still pretty hot.

“The mugs are still hot” you say as Dean gets the fire started.

Taking his mug, you hand it to him, watching as he downs the hot beverage almost completely in one go.

As he turns back to the fire you lose your wet shirt and replace it by a grey sweater you stole long ago from him, even from before you started dating. It was after a nasty hunt and you wanted him close to chase away the nightmares, you have slept with it every night back then.

“Underwear it is” he mumbles after noticing his pants are wet from the melted snow.

“Come here, Dean” you state, watching his big body shake.

You take several blankets while he takes off his robe.

“Let me burrito you” you say with a smile.

“Burrito me ?” he chuckles as he walks closer to you, accepting your offer despite his amused smirk.

You wrap the blankets completely around him, pushing his arms down next to his body, take several more to cover his giant body into a cute burrito, wrapping it so tight he can barely move.

“My arms are stuck” he says with a smile when you’re tugging at the last blankets on his back to create a hood to make sure his ears and wet head stay warm.

“Burritos have no arms, baby” you cup his face to kiss him. “Your nose is all red, my poor Deanie.”

His lips puck and aim for yours but you kiss his cute red little nose instead to warm it.

“I’m not a poor Deanie’ he says with a deep voice that’s anything but ‘poor’ “I’m a hunter. I’m a warrior!”

Any other day you would completely agree. But now ? He is like a huge soft sausage, you can’t help but chuckle at how ridiculously cute he looks.

“I need to take a pic, you’re incredibly cute like this” you state, reaching for your phone as you see him wiggle in protest, which only makes him look cuter.

“No no. don’t keep ridiculous photos of me” he whines.

You still take a picture, this is an opportunity you can’t miss. His grumpy face on the pic makes you laugh harder, this is one of the personal photos you will cherish forever. You put your phone on the little wooden table and snuggle next to him, trying to wrap your arms around your burrito boyfriend.

“My baby… You’re not ridiculous” you reassure him. “Seeing you like this makes me happy.”

You chuckle as you can see his wiggly toes peeking out from all the covers, you truly got your Winchester trapped.

You snuggle for a while in the comfortable silence.

After a few minutes he moves his head backward to push the hood back, you can feel the covers grow hot with his body heat, but that’s not the only thing you feel… he’s getting tense, his otherwise soft stomach gets harder, his breath seems to lose the slow rhythm and it comes out heavier.

“Dean you’re tensing again” you say as you move your hand to his stomach.

“I’m sorry” he sighs, his eyes on the ceiling,his Adam’s apple going up and down.

You stare at his worried form for a moment.

“You know you can talk to me right ?” you trace slow circles over his stomach, your head resting on his shoulder.

Dean has a habit of keeping everything in, now and then you try to softly coax him to let go. It’s hard for him, you know that, and that’s why you never push him to talk, but he always ends up coming to you thanks to that deep trust between the two of you. You however remind him that you are always there for him.

“I’m not over Mary’s death” he exhaled, his words carrying a heavy weight to them and you feel your heart tighten painfully.

You lift your head to look at him, pushing his covers down so you can put your hand over his heart. Letting him feel you’re here for him.

“I know, baby. No one asks you to be over your mother’s death so soon, or ever” you say.

“I’m just… so angry” his eyes fill with tears and hear him swallow hard to try hold them back.

It hurts you to see him try to stay strong in every circumstance, he really doesn’t always have to be.

“You have every right to be angry, Dean. Furious even. It is unfair. She was given back to just be taken again.”

“Why ?” he says as his dam starts to break, your own heart breaking a little at seeing the tear roll down his cheek. “F-first dad has to leave again after only one day and now…”

You close your eyes at the hurt and sorrow in his voice, your strong warrior is taking off his harness for you, and it is nothing but brave. You stroke his hair, needing to comfort him.

“I… I just have so much anger” he repeats “I feel responsible, I feel h-helpless and…and… abandoned.”

His voice breaks at the last word, and you know how vulnerable he is when it comes to his parents. He always takes too much on his own, blames himself. You’ll do anything to help him realize he’s not responsible and not abandoned…

“You’re not” You say as you wipe your own tears, you heart aching for him, but this isn’t about your tears.

You open the covers and slip in next to him, the heat surrounding you two. He nuzzles his face in your neck, your skin getting wet from his tears.

“It’s okay to be angry” you put your hand over his head, holding him close to you, trying to protect him from all the hurting. “It’s okay to be sad. It’s not your fault, Dean. It was cruel to make them come back only to take them again, but you’re not abandoned. I’m here, Sam is here, Cas too…”

“You’re here” he whispers, his arms tighten around you. “Yes, you’re always here.”

“Look outside” You say.

It is snowing heavily, just as planned. He looks toward the small window with his reddened eyes making the green if it seems lighter. You use your hand to wipe his tears.

“There is nowhere we can go for now. Sam is safe and Cas promised to stay in the bunker to keep an eye on everything. No hunt planned, just the snow and me.”

His head turns towards you, his bright eyes searching for something on your face.

“You had checked the weather, right ?” he asks, his eyes looking around our little cabin.

“I did…” you admit, you needed a plan B for in case he would want to leave, getting snowed in was an ideal option. “Just to be sure you would have no regret to be here, because now you can’t leave anyway. But you’re not locked forever !” you chuckle. “I’m not a psycho. The snow will only fall like that tonight, and if we really want to leave tomorrow, we can. But the place is ours for a week…” You said hopeful, you aren’t ready to leave this comfy cocoon yet, but if he wants to go, you’ll follow him.

Relief washes through you as he confirms he wants to stay.

“Now Dean” you peck his lips, happy to have more one-on-one time with him. “We have all this time to talk about anything, or binge Dr. Sexy MD, we have nothing else to do than relax. No one is waiting for you.”

He grabs your thigh to pull you over his lap, making you straddle him. He’s looking at you, his hand on your thighs and a soft smile on his lips. His eyes are still a little red from crying earlier, he’s so beautiful, his face is a work of art you could stare at forever. The feelings you have for this man are intense, sometimes you even have trouble breathing because it can be very overwhelming, but one touch from him and you immediately calm down.

He’s your everything.

“How do we do that ?” he asks, breaking the silence between you and you frown a little.” How do we enjoy winter ?”

You smile wide, winter is your specialty.

“It’s all about laziness” you say out of experience. “About being warm when it’s so cold outside, about doing silly things, eating like kids and never looking at your watch. Anything that makes us feel comfy actually.”

His features and body are relaxing a little already, he takes some candies from the tray when he asks :

“Can we watch an animated movie ?”

“Yup” you nod, reaching to the ground to take the bag with DVDs, looking at what you brought with you. “I have Big Hero 6, The Lion King, of course, Madagascar, Totoro, Hotel Transylvania and uhm… Kung Fu panda !”

“You packed all that ?” he smiles up at you.

“Of course, I took a little of everything.”

You like to have many options. He pecks your lips, his lips pulling a hum from you.

His fingers dive in the bag of gummy bears, the bag ripping a little at the size of his enormous hand compared to the little candies.

“Whoops” he says when a few bears escape his grasp and fall to the floor, he bends to catch them but your reflexes are faster and catch most of them.

“So” you say as you stuff the candy in your mouth. “Besides getting diabetes while watching animated movies ? Do you have plans ?”

“Yeah” he smiles, taking the bag from the tray to put it on his lap between you two and take another handful in his mouth. “Broiling marshmallows in the fireplace.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s in the diabetes category, baby” you nod.

“Building a pillow fort definitely, and cuddling” he adds. You smile wide, two of your favorite things ever ! “Come up with a new mac and cheese recipe. Making love everywhere and sleeping, I obviously need sleep. But I’m struggling to rest lately…” he says with a frown.

You smile mischievously.

“Maybe if I tire you enough…” You lick your lips. “Then you will fall asleep more easily.”

“I like the way you think” he groans as he puts the candy bag to the side.

His hands move up your sides as you put your hands on his shoulders and lean down to capture his lips.

His warm hands wrap around your lower back to pull you into his body, your hips start rolling into his hips. You can feel his soft cock growing through your sweats and his underwear.

His body reacts so quickly to yours… You tug with your teeth at his bottom lip, your hands moving up to run your fingers through his hair.

“You’re perfect Dean” you sit up and reach for the hem of his shirt to pull it over his head. Once he is free, you start kissing down his chest, you worship this man.

When you circle your tongue around his nipple you can feel his cock twitch and his breath hitch, he had always loved that.

His hand tangles into your hair, moaning your name.

“Fuck Y/n baby… I need to see you” he sighs from deep in his chest.

You take off your big sweater, a smile on your face as you see his eyes darken at your bare chest, you like to wear it with nothing underneath.

His lips connect with your nipple, sucking it into his mouth, humming around it. Electricity roams your already burning body.

“F-fuck Dean” you let your head fall back, your hand fists in his hair.

Your hips roll harder into his now hard cock, heat pooling into the crotch of your sweatpants, no doubt soaking his underwear. He tugs at the little cord of your pants, untying and pushing it down.

“I need to come home baby… please” he licks up your neck, sucking his mark onto your skin.

“Y-yes Dean… t-take me” you beg him.

He growls and turns to push you back on the couch gently, he follows so that now you’re the one on your back and he is on top of you.

He takes your pants completely off, and licks his lips.

“Fuck… you soaked me through your pants baby” his fingers stroke your folds, making you gasp loudly. “So wet for me.”

“A-always” you pant, he pushes two fingers inside of you, looking deep into your eyes with a grin on his face.

He slowly starts pumping his fingers, a little too slow. You grab his wrist and whine.

“What baby ? You want something ?” he husks into your ear, his burning breath caressing your neck.

“M-more, p-please Dean” you moan, eyes rolling back as he pushes his fingers deeper into you, pumping faster.

“F-fuck yes…” you spread you legs more, giving him more room to work, letting his wrist go to grasp your own breast.

“I’m gonna come, Dean” you moan.

His fingers move faster only making you moan louder as the burning feeling spreads quickly all over your body, thighs shaking a little at the overwhelming waves coming from the spots he’s magically touching. You feel sweat break through your sensitive skin.

“Yes baby, come for me, clench my fingers” he pant against your lips, kissing you hard as you clench his fingers inside you, groaning into his mouth as you come hard.

“D-DEAN YES”

He sweetly kisses your face, humming he retracts his fingers, putting them in his mouth.

“You taste so good, baby.”

You grab his neck and pull him down to kiss him hard, your other hand pushing on his lower back.

“Take me Dean. Come home” you beg.

He takes off his underwear and sits between your thighs. You cup his face as you both look down how he guides his cock home, making your breath tremble in anticipation.

After the first inch his eyes connect with your, you tug him closer making him lean down on his elbows.

“I love you Dean” you say as he bottoms out, the stretch of his cock giving you endless pleasure.

“I love you too, Y/n” he grinds his hips into yours, making your eyes flutter before he starts slowly thrusting in and out of you.

You put your feet flat on the couch to be able to push your hips into his, meeting him thrust for thrust.

“Feel so good, baby” he groans, burying his sweaty forehead in your neck to pant against your skin as his hips snap a little harder into you.

You moan loudly and wrap your arms around his back.

“Yes ! L-Let go Dean… Take me !”

He groans hard as his hips start to pound into you. His open mouth sucking another mark on your shoulder as you cling to his back. Your body moving up with every hard thrust, his pelvis slapping against your clit in a deliciously rough way. You wrap your legs around him to push him deeper into you with your calves.

Your walls clench around him as you grow closer to climax. You’re lost in his body, lost in your own feelings and sensations.

“Yes yes yes yes yes yes !” you chant with every thrust, his head coming up from your head to look into your eyes.

“C-come Y/n. Come on my cock.”

Your nails scratch down his back as you fall over the edge, milking his cock for his cum, you need it… need it to feel complete and full. You gasp, arching your back into his chest, screaming his name.

“DEAN ! YES!”

His hips snap hard into you one last time as he fills you up with his cum, you watch as his eyes clench shut and feel his thighs tremble against you.

“FUCK Y/N ! GRAAH !” he buries his face in your neck, groaning against you.

Panting fills the room as he falls limp on you, your fingers run through his sweaty hair.

“I love you so much Y/n” he says as his powerful arms move under your back to hold you closer.

“I love you too Dean. So so much.”

He looks up at you, his sweaty skin gleaming with the flames of the fireplace.

“I want to stay the whole week” he says with a small smile.

“Then we stay a whole week, baby” you keep stroking his hair, loving the feel of his soft locks beneath your fingertips. He hums at your touch.

“Thank you baby, for everything” his lips meet yours in a tender kiss.

You smile against his lips.

“Everything for you, baby.”

FEEDBACK IS GOLD

#winter cabin #y/n pov #dean x reader #roonyxx #collab #jay and dean #dean smut #dean fluff #supernatural fanfic #spn #supernatural #smut

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still-a-morosexual-help · 3 years ago

Note

ok this has been in my head rent free for like the past week but from your expert analysis, what element do you think the brothers are? also you got me curious on what fire related powers mammon has now lmao

Oh oh okay!

So Mammon & Beel (and MC) use wind magic pretty easily too so I kinda HC that they can use all kinds of elemental magic pretty easily but there's usually one that you have an affinity for

Lucifer - Lightning

-> You know that little crackly ball of lighting when Lucifer gets really mad? (The others do it too but not as frequently as Lucifer)

-> Sharp and dangerous and deadly

-> atla called lightning "the cold blooded fire" and I can't stop thinking about that because I think it somehow fits Lucifer really well. It also links him with Mammon, and shows their similarities and differences

2023 Update:

-> Lucifer uses lightning as his attack in the NB rhythm game

-> In Lucifer's devilgram where they basically have little magical familiar's/basically pokemon that are supposed to match them (eg: Levi's has water powers) Lucifer's one uses lightning powers

(I called this shit 2 years ago fuck yeah!)

Mammon - Fire

-> (lots of) Evidence from canon here

Levi - Water

-> I mean...

Satan - Energy

-> He was created from pure energy

-> Explosive anger like Satan's just feels like something that needs a lot of energy

-> He constantly pushes down his anger letting it all build up until he explodes

-> Waves of pure energy that when he gets pissed will plow through anything and anyone that stands in his way

Asmo - Wind

-> I always see Asmo as being kind of flighty and airy and floaty

-> He has no permanent attachments to his numerous lovers

-> He can also be extremely dangerous and cruel and cutting

-> He can use it to spread his pheromones to get more people to fall for him

Beel - Earth.

-> He summons a giant humanoid rock creature in S3 the same way Levi summons Lotan

-> Also earth is associated with being strong and somewhat defensive and Beel's strong but takes on a defensive position when fighting (according to what he said in S3)

Belphie - Darkness/Shadows

-> This is obviously not an element but I have some vague memory of Belphie summoning some darkness/shadow creature in S3 (might have to check it again)

-> Could he manipulate other peoples shadows? To tether them to a place or weigh them down and force them to indulge in Sloth?

-> He'd also be able to put people to sleep and manipulate their dreams

About powers I have no concrete idea but anime and atla have given me so many thoughts and possibilities that are just bouncing around in my head???

For now, though, with what little canon evidence we have:

• In S3 MC uses fire to attack a man, making it spread through the circus tent without actually burning anyone or anything but still strong enough to melt a speeding bullet so something along those lines would be probable

• With Mammon's association with dragons and his onesie being able to breathe fire I'd say breathing fire would also be a possibility

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marvelettesassemblenow · 3 years ago

Text

Steve, Duke & You

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Summary: Steve literally stole your dog when you moved into the compound and these two connected. The pictures you got when you were on a mission just added to the jealousy you felt towards your own dog.

Word Count: 1.6k

A/N: This is Chris Evans fault for posting these precious pictures with Dodger! Also I said drabble, right? Jokes on me...

There once had been a time when you had a dog named Duke. When you had lived in your old apartment you had taken him out for your old neighbor a lot. And when the neighbor passed away and there seemed to be no one taking care of the dog you took him in. How could you have said no to those eyes?

There was no way that you would have known that these eyes would get competition. That was before you moved into the Avengers compound and met no other than Captain America. He should be glad that the nation didn’t know that he mastered the art of puppy eyes.

You should be glad that someone was looking after Duke when you were away on a mission. But now it just felt like you didn’t have a dog anymore and that Steve gained a new companion. You were looking at the screen on your phone where a picture popped up. Steve was holding Duke in his arms, Dukes paws in the air while both of them had their faces turned towards each other and looking content. There was a slight sting in your chest looking at it and you wondered who had taken that picture.

Who would have guessed that your dog had a better love story than you? It seemed like the moment Duke and Steve met the world stood still for a second. They had looked at each other until Duke had sprinted forwards and jumped up at Steves impressive body and liked his face while his tail didn’t stop wiggling. You tried to introduce yourself and apologized for the untypical behavior of your dog, but Steve didn’t seem to mind. It took a while until he stopped scratching the fur and petted the head so he could shake your hand. It just got worse after you moved in and Duke didn’t seem to leave the captain's side.

A notification plopped up on the photo showing you got another picture of Steve. It was captioned The Outtake and showed Steve squinting his eyes so he had wrinkles all around the eyes while Duke’s tongue was covering half of his face as he was liking it when the picture was taken.

“What are you looking at?” Natasha asked and looked over your shoulder. “Oh, you might need to talk about custody with him.”

“As if I didn’t know,” you scoffed. Another message arrived.

He misses you.

We miss you.

“Or maybe you don’t.”

“Hey, stop reading my messages,” you turned off the screen and put it away. You couldn’t wait to go back home and cuddle with your dog. If you could pry him from Steve that is, although joining them wouldn’t be so bad. But while you and Steve were kind of friends most of your talks surrounded the pet and while you were glad about that you couldn’t help but wish for more.

“Hey pal, that’s your moms. You’re not supposed to play with it.” Steve tried to grab the giant sloth toy that Duke was bringing into his room. There was already drool on it and Steve quickly gave up as he didn’t want the stuffed animal to rip. Duke seemed happy and jumped on the bed placing the sloth and curling around it. He lifted his head and looked at Steve. “Oh, you’re just missing her. But be careful with it,” he said and stroked the dogs fur. He snapped another picture for you. The last ones were seen but you hadn’t responded.

He just hoped that you were okay. Most of the time you’d reply when you had seen the photos at least with an emoji. “Guess there’s nothing we can do except waiting.” He laid down next to the animal and turned on the TV. His nose was filled with the smell of your shampoo and he couldn’t help to wonder if the sloth really slept in your bed the days Duke would stay at his side. Bucky had gifted it to you as a joke, but maybe it wasn’t a joke to you.

He felt bad about stealing your dog, but you assured him it was okay. He didn’t mean for the dog to steal his heart, but when they had looked at each other he couldn’t help himself. And when he heard your voice and looked up and saw your face while you were telling him that Duke was more trained usually, he couldn’t help but think that you could steal his heart too. Not that Steve would ever admit that out loud! Especially not since you just did that.

But it was way easier to connect over a dog than talk about his feelings.

“Dude, now it’s just embarrassing. Stealing her plushie?” a voice interrupted his thoughts.

“I didn’t steal anything. Duke just,” Steve started to defend himself to Bucky.

“Sure, blame the poor dog,” Bucky interrupted. “How many pictures have you sent her today?”

“I’m just letting her know that Duke is okay and cared for. There's nothing wrong with it,” Steve voice got a little louder causing Duke to raise his ears.

“Then why are you getting so defensive? How many?” Bucky pestered.

“Four,” Steve mumbled.

“And how many had you in it?”

“Three,” Steve’s voice got even quieter.

“Just talk to her about your feelings.”

“What, like you’re the expert suddenly?”

“I got more action than you,” Bucky had the audacity to wink at him and left the room before Steve could throw anything at him. Jerk, he thought.

“Where’s your welcoming committee?” Natasha asked once the two of you stepped into the compound. Usually Steve and Duke would wait for you at the hanger but you couldn’t spot them. When the spy and you walked further into the compound and closer to the living quarters you met Clint who greeted the two of you and he and Nat went their own way, already discussing what had happened these last four days.

You stepped into the living room, expecting to see them cuddling on the couch. When you didn’t spot them there you went to Steves room. The door was open and you looked inside but there was also no sight of them.

“They’re not here,” a voice behind you said and scared you. “They’re on a walk, should be back soon,” Bucky commented once you turned towards him.

“Do me a favor and just help me out. Ask the old man out. He won’t do it and you not responding to his photos that he only did so you could see your dog is taken care of,” he made quotes in the air with his hands, “had him moping around. Actually, he and your dog had the same expression now that I think about it.”

“Aren’t you older than Steve?” you asked with raised eyebrows.

“Oh sure, that is what you pick up on. Just ask him out. You like him, he likes you. Easy as that.”

You crossed your arms in front of you. “And since when are you an expert?”

“See, you even match,” he grunted before he walked away.

You put your stuff into your room and decided to take a shower. When you were showered and changed you opened your door just to be met with Duke sitting in front of your door next to Steve who stood in front of it.

As soon as Duke saw you, he jumped up and pushed his nose against your legs and you crouched down and smothered him in love. Okay, maybe your dog missed you too.

“Are you okay?” Steve asked once Duke had calmed down and you started to get up.

“Yeah, everything's okay. Thanks for taking care of this rascal,” you said and smiled at him which cause him to beam at you.

“Always, you know that.”

“Do you,” you cleared your throat and started over. “I wanted to watch a movie. Do you might want to join me?”

“Yes,” Steves reply came so fast it startled him and you. “Have you eaten anything yet? If not, I could do something real quick.” You told him that would be nice and fifteen minutes later Steve carried some snacks into your room.

You were already sitting on your bed and patted the place next to you which caused Steve and Duke to walk towards you and you to laugh. “I think the bed is big enough for the three of us,” you chuckled.

After you had finished the snacks it ended with Dukes head on your stomach while his body was between your and Steve’s legs and your head on Steve’s chest while he was stroking your arm. “If I wouldn’t be afraid to move I would take a picture. I’d rather have a cute one of the three of us as a background than the one I have of you and Duke,” you mumbled sleepily.

“We’re your lock screen?” Steve asked shocked.

“Of course. What do I think I make with these pictures you sent me? These are just too precious.” You didn’t know how he made it, but Steves long arm was suddenly stretched out, his phone in his hand and he took a picture with the three of you in it. “You have to send it to me. And that reminds me: Where is my sloth?” But as you were slowly falling asleep and your voice was barely audible Steve could avoid telling you that it was still laying in his bed because it smelled like you.

Masterlist

divider by @fireflygraphics

#steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #avengers x reader #steve rogers oneshot #steve rogers x you #steve x you #captain america x you #steve x y/n #steve rogers x y/n #marvelettesassemblenow #fluff

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sneezefiction · 4 years ago

Text

my turn

atsumu x reader

desc: you get a back massage from a gremlin your fiancé

a/n: @gahdam-beb hollz, thank you bunches for this cuteness! he absolutely would give good back massages. may or may not have gotten super carried away here – i meant for this to be like,, 200 words. not proofread & it’s all lowercase :,)

warnings: language, mentions marriage, mentions stabbing (i promise this entire fic is pure fluff though)

wc: 1.3k

—

so maybe the couch isn’t the best place to sprawl out on.

but you could hardly make it through the apartment door, much less all the way to your bedroom.

a leg dangles limply off the side of the worn-down sofa while the rest of your body merges with the cushion. the smell of pizza from last night’s takeout lingers on the soft material. an air conditioner unit whirs on and a chill streams across your skin, making your hairs stand on end.

unfortunately, all the throw blankets are either in the dryer or on your bed. and your fiancé? well, Atsumu is nowhere to be seen.

you sigh into a pillow.

it’s not every day you feel deprived of his presence. the blond is a lot to handle and he has a habit of bringing chaos with him wherever he goes, whether it’s a quick jaunt to the kitchen or across the country at a volleyball game.

but you can’t help but miss Atsumu, his chaos included. you’re quite endeared to him, actually.

i mean, there’s certainly a reason you’re wearing that silver engagement ring.

but right now it’s not just him that you’re missing. it’s those warm hands of his.

they tickle and prod and they’re not the softest things in the world... but they sure make for a back’s best friend. if you could wish for anything right now, it would be a back massage — for someone to rub and smooth away the tension of another long day.

but he’s not supposed to be back for another hour.

you shut your eyes, choosing to nap until he eventually walks through the door... but a tapping outside keeps your ears perked at attention.

the steps grow heavier in the corridor and, alongside that noise, your heart starts to thrumb louder too. you got off work early and your neighbors don’t typically come home til late... so you’re definitely not expecting anyone.

soon you realize the footsteps are just outside your door.

your heart jumps as the door clicks open and, from it, a rather refreshed-looking Atsumu emerges.

you thank the couch gods that it’s just him.

you would’ve rather been stabbed than defend yourself — you’re too tired to deal with that bullshit. but you’re glad that the universe hadn’t sealed your fate just yet.

“i’m home,” he calls, drawling out the words, “did ya miss me?”

you acknowledge him with a pitiful groan into the couch. it was an attempt at saying “yes” but even you aren’t sure of the unholy sound you just made.

“i don’t speak gremlin,” he chuckles.

you lift your head, shooting him a look.

“that’s unfortunate since you pretty much are one,” you say, dryly.

his jaw drops.

“i’m gonna tell ‘Samu you said that. we have the same face, y’know.”

okay, maybe you should be a little nicer if you want him to put his hands all over you... in a nonsexual way... at least for right now.

you don’t respond to him.

but that doesn’t stop him from talking.

“did somebody have a bad day?” his voice is high and he juts a lip out, taunting you.

you frown violently (if that’s at all possible). yes, he’s joking, but his face looks a fraction more slappable now.

“not particularly,” is your somewhat honest answer.

he shrugs off his jacket, the fabric tussling as he tosses it onto a wooden coat rack. there’s a clink of keys and the plop of a wallet on the countertop.

soon, those heavy steps you heard from outside are treading in your direction until he reaches the corner of the couch – right where your face is. without any hesitation, he sinks into a squat until you’re at eye-level with the giant.

you don’t move an inch, but even though you’re irritated, you kind of wanna kiss him.

“you’re home early,” you mumble, instead of grabbing his face and crashing your lips into his.

Atsumu tilts his head, “i wanted to surprise ya ‘cus i knew you’d be off early.”

he looks annoyingly attractive under the dingy living-room light. where are his dark circles? why are there no wrinkles on his forehead?

you, on the otherhand, probably look like a sloth on its last leg... arm? sloth appendages are confusing and you’d rather not think about that right now.

“is there anything i can do for ya?” he asks, softening at your grumpy expression.

yes.

“no.”

why are you making this difficult for yourself? it’s obvious you’re not doing too hot... and you really want that back massage – your muscles are practically screaming at you for relief.

he leans in closer, brushing his knuckles across your exposed cheek. they’re gentle on your skin.

“are ya sure?” he asks, his voice just above a whisper.

okay, sometimes he’s sweet. but only sometimes.

“can... you give me a massage?” you mumble through pouting lips.

a gentle smile forms on his lips, “yeah.”

he stands, long legs replacing the space where his face once was. Atsumu then shuffles to your side, but it takes him a moment to get situated.

the couch dips as he places a knee on either side of you, straddling your hips. Atsumu makes ass-to-ass contact. the most romantic of positions.

you squeal as he crushes you beneath him.

“oh, c’mon i’m not that heavy,” Atsumu snorts.

“says the guy who’s not actively being squashed into a couch.”

although you’d rather this than the burning ache under your skin.

he grumbles under his breath, but you choose to ignore it. suddenly, fingers are pressing deeply into your upper back and grazing your shoulder blades.

a quick gasp escapes your lips and you instantly regret it.

his deep chuckle shakes his body and, in turn, yours too. thankfully, his lips stay sealed.

you wish you could see that little smirk of his, as much as it bugs you, while he works his magic on your tight shoulders. there’s something so charming about that lopsided grin – it’s part of why you love him so much.

he adjusts again, accidentally kneeing you in the side.

“shit! be careful,” you jolt, warning him.

he smooths a hand down your hip and mutters out a genuine “sorry,” atoning in both word and deed.

in doing so, a metallic coolness brushes against an exposed patch of skin, making you shiver. you peek over your shoulder to see what it is.

it’s the ring on his finger...

and suddenly you can’t fuss at him anymore.

instead, warmth travels steadily throughout your body and his palms burn against your skin.

how can you be marrying him and still flush over the silliest things? in your defense, the ring is a relatively new thing in your relationship. it throws you for a loop anytime you catch sight of it.

Atsumu kneads firmly into the tissues, loosing stubborn knots and waking up your tired skin. his hands are large and stable; like a potter to unshaped clay, the digits mould and shape and indent.

slowly, but surely, your body relaxes and your mood lifts. a soft, virtually undetectable smile is on your lips.

Atsumu could be hellish and rude and a brat about the oddest things. he’s pretty gross and always tries to hug you when he’s dripping sweat. you’re also certain, positive, without a shadow of a doubt sure that he’s the more disagreeable twin.

but you’re probably the only person who can put up with him.

and he, you.

it’s a good thing you found each other... and even better that you can both give great back massages. it’s likely that’s what’s preserving your relationship.

hopefully, that same tactic works in marriage too.

you hum to yourself and your eyes, already drooping, finally close. Atsumu softens his touch, tracing the curves and contours of your body, lulling you into a hazy state.

Atsumu, rough and tumble as he is, could be gentle when he wanted to be — a side of him that easily made you see stars and super novas where only golden eyes and blond strands exist.

at some point, you think you feel a ghost of a breath against your skin.

maybe even a pair of lips pressing to your neck? you’re a little too out of it to tell.

but as soon as you find yourself drifting off, his hands peel away from you. it’s like you just lost a piece of yourself because you’re desperately searching for that missing warmth.

you whine in protest, turning to face the cruel man. after such a long fucking week, he chose to stop. and you were almost asleep too.

but that bastard.

that disgustingly adorable bastard.

he’s smiling as wide and bright as the milky way. there’s not even a hint of guilt.

“my turn,” he directs through a waggish grin.

alright, he’s slappable again.

—

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #atsumu x reader #atsumu miya #atsumu #ass-to-ass contact #amen am i right #i'm a genius #(this is sarcasm)#anyway sorry for what you just read #i typed this in an hour #let me know if u think i could make atsumu even /more/ annoying #because i think i can #the number of times i wrote ‘couch’#is too many

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