#getting lost trying not die you know
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totk actually kicking my ass!!
#I am running around Hyrule I am running around [redacted] I am running around the Sky#Am I avoiding Goron City?? yes✌ It's too hot and I need more Rupees so I don't burn to a crisp💕💕#in the mean time I am completing side adventures#getting lost trying not die you know#saw spoiler out of context so now I'm 😭🤨🤨#anyway why are these shrines so hard😭#sealingknight.txt.ramble#totk
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Jennifer nearly jumped into the water / and she was tired like no one's ever been tired
#myart#wesley crusher#jennifer is on her way home. then she remembers her life is like a nightmare!!!!#geniunelyyyy thinking about the post-first duty years of wesleys life is so miserable.#he killed his best friend and ruined his friendship with everyone else and lost picards respect (the only thing he ever cared about)#and then you just. dont hear about him at all for 2 years.#trying to capture the extremely specific existential dread of knowing something is deeply wrong in your life but not being able to change.#JUST THE LOOK OF A YOUNG MAN WHOS PROFOUNDLY UNHAPPY AND DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHY!!!#the quote from that novel. where he says “jaxa knew better than the rest of us the only way to escape this thing was to die”. ITS SICK!!#like leaving starfleet was not even on his radar until journeys end. he didnt even consider that as an option. so what could he do.#man. theres a reason for the prominently placed golden gate bridge. jennifer nearly jumped into the water.... cuz she got no way to get out#the photos in the bg are him and picard. jack. two of joshie (the ski tripppppp) him and bev and the entire nova squadron up top#do i think he would have his room this nicely decorated while horribly depressed NO!!! it was just for the compostion of the piece#like trying so hard to keep up appearances. being surrounded by pictures of all the people who love him and still not able to get out.#some of the papers lying around the desk are like. intended to be letters to bev that he just gave up on writing.#OKAY sorry i just wanted to finish this before i leave tomorrow. i spent such a stupid amount of time on this. never again#you people should always talk to me forever about my friend wesley . im soooo normal. lies facedown on floor#OH AND THE VERY SPECIFIC. EMOTION. LYING ON BED IN FULL UNIFORM. WE'VE ALLLL BEEN THERE.
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zionists don't realise it but saying 'this is the most jewish thing ever!' and 'people hate when jews do something clever' and and reporting it as 'innovative methods which carried out a precise military operation' and joking about ongoing attacks using everyday technology to injure thousands of civilians is not. good
#sadly i don't know how to describe the feeling but#the depravity of cheering for 'men losing their testicles' in gaza and lebanon/syria is something i have seen multiple times now#it's recurring#something which has stood out multiple times over the recent months not just with devices blowing up#bottom surgery jokes when people have lost their eyes and fingers and chunks of their stomach#cheering on death as if it means nothing#calling children terrorists who deserved to die#killing civilians and causing mass disabling events in multiple countries does not prove you're winning#that's not a military win in any form#watching anyone celebrate the death of children and regular people regardless of where there from is not normal#that's not normal behaviour#it's not good#how that can be seen as a positive thing for Zionists who are then advertising Zionism as Jewishness i don't know#Palestine#Lebanon#Syria#try to stay offline if in the region#stay safe everyone#fight oppressors where you can#don't praise the 'strategy' of 'precisely' targeting civilians and kids that will all get labeled as evil active fighters#👍#none of it's a surprise considering the history but it still surprises me sometimes the way it doesn't register to them#that maybe associating killing civilians and being gleeful about child murder with Being Jewish is. not good#like that's not a good look for PR you'd think there would at least be some pretense or pretend but no
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I was thinking on when Steve lost Bucky for the 3rd time (1st when he was drafted, 2nd when he was told he was MIA, 3rd when he fell) he tried to get drunk to forget, right? If he did that then...
What did he do when he lost him for the 6th time? (4th when he escaped, 5th when Bucky was in cryo, 6th the snap)
I mean technically Bucky died twice, but Steve lost him six times already.
And of he tried to get blind drunk once of those times- did he self-harm in other ways too?
To dull the pain? He can't get drunk, he heals quickly, he can't die easily either, so what did he do?
He wouldn't want to die when he knows for a fact that Bucky is alive ofc, but I can't see him acting normally or without a little bit of reckless energy.
To dull the pain and disappoinment (he can't feel like that, that's Bucky's choice -Cryo-. But how it hurts him tho).
(unrelated to this line of thought but it is relevant to the idea regardless)
That's why I can't fathom the idea of Steve abandoning Bucky in endgame.
He lost him 6 six (6) times already and he just... Went away? To a woman he only kissed once? After all he did for him, the pain and loss?
Even if you don't ship them, you have to think that to be really ooc on Steve's part. Everything in his character arc in the MCU is related to Bucky (and loss). Yes he liked Peggy, but he didn't suffer nor mourn her the same way he mourned Bucky (She was alive, but had dementia and was also very old, and had her own life).
His feelings for Peggy were more a "what if" and lost possibilities than anything.
She was an idea, a fantasy (that's why Wanda used that when fighting with him, right?). Not something real.
He wanted to be with her, but he didn't really knew her or love her (at least I don't think so).
She was the first woman that saw him for him after all. Before everything. But that's it.
He liked her for that (and her strong personality too) but did he love her? He didn't try to get on dates after he was defrosted because he knew people would only see Captain America, not Steve Rogers. He needed to represent an ideal and knew no one would understand (the pain, loss) and have the patience to be with him. That’s why he also highlighted the shared life experience thing.
So she was comforting, reassuring in a toxic and unhealthy kind of way (memories and fantasy aren't healthy when used like that). But still a what if and lost opportunity. He had to let her go at one point. And he did(!) But they had to fuck it up…
I mean... it's the same thing when you're still hung up on an ex. You want to think of the possibilities, the what ifs, the "what could have been" But when you go back to them nothing is like you remembered, nothing is like you wanted and you are dissatisfied and disappointed.
(Because all of that was in your head, it wasn't real).
And besides, he knew she had a life of her own (a fulfilling one at that) so what, he was selfish enough to fuck that up too? Without helping HIM? Without saving HIM? Abandoning HIM? After just being brought to life? After grieving him for another five years? Bucky was his best friend, his companion, his best pal…
He wouldn't do that to him. He would die before hurting Bucky (as they already stablished for most of the fucking movies) He even was like “You don’t understand” when Peggy talked to him in the bars ruins.
I think in canon (not ooc/EG)Steve would entertain the idea, but would decide to just keep it as that: An idea, a fantasy. And move on like he already did before.
Also the idea that it was a Peggy from an alternative universe is flawed because he abandoned HIS Bucky, even if in the other universe he helped or whatever.
In HIS UNIVERSE he abandoned his best friend? Not believable. And the logic of “oh it didn’t change their timeline because it was another one” is also stupid.
They already fucked up with Steve fighting 2012!Steve and also telling him about Bucky (creating another universe more than likely). And they were supposed to be undetected. Not create new universes. Thats also why I’m so keen on the idea of Steve being in a prison or something. He already fucked up once, twice if you think he went to the past to stay.
How can he be free while fucking up the timelines? Yeah, nah.
Also… they implied Steve can’t age in a movie if I remember correctly…. How did he become old?
And the idea that he went to Peggy because “Tony told him to have a life outside of captain america” is fucked up. So what? He relates his Bucky’s existence with work? FUCK OFF. Endgame Steve is fucked up and the worst character assassination I’ve ever seen.
They were just too annoyed with the fans because we ship Stucky (even tho they used that to promote the movies in panels and stuff, hypocrites -I remember clearly the producers? of the movie talk about gay characters and the actors talk about Stucky in those panels for then…be one of the russos in like 1 second and have that shit ass, fuck ass ending for Steve and Bucky. That shit was vile-).
im also annoyed with some people that now shit on Steve when umh… did you see the movies? The other movies? Not only Endgame? (Btw the only one that got a “good ending” was Tony because he died as a hero in front of everyone -even tho he didn’t want to help at first because he had a good life, the ONLY ONE OF THEM might I add-, everyone else got worse, is dead or they’re neglected and treated as haha funny character or haha funny moment)
Im all for ships and ideas and headcanons (even when I hate them with passion, you do you) but don’t try and use this character assassination as an excuse to shit on Steve. If you NEED to shit on a character for your ship to work, then you’re not doing a good job at it or your ship sucks. Idk what to tell you.
#steve rogers#im rambling about Captain America and the stupidity of Endgame#anti endgame#mcu#marvel mcu#ramblings#im rambling bc Im pissed off#i wrote this on twt originally#but I expanded it on here#stucky#endgame isnt canon in this house#Tbh im also mad at the idea of Tnoy being selfless or a hero for dying#he didn’t want to help bc HIS life was good#and of course he had to get the only good ending out of everyone lmao#even Natasha was neglected#endgame is so fucked up man#I fucking hate the ending so bad#you dont understand#also I dislike Tony because they always always try to make him more likeble by omitting info (like in the accords)#or putting a kid in front of him and saying see he’s doing it for the kids benefit!#like no the accords would have fucked up with Peters life too#and Morgan was only there to make them not go back in time bc the fucker abandoned his kid anyway#by dying but you know#he needed to die a hero#gimme a break and now RDJ is back in the mcu#idk Im really not a hater of Tony but I dislike when they try too hard to make him likeble#hes an asshole deal with it#dislexia hates me rlly bad and im not going to correct the tags but you get the idea#i had to edit this bc I realized that Steve actually lost bucky 6 times#i mean technically
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the odyssey and subnautica are narrative parallels. btw
#subnautica#the odyssey#YOU ARE ODYSSEUS LOST AT SEA DESPERATELY TRYING TO GET HOME#THE PRECURSORS ARE POSEIDON RULERS OF THE SEA SHOOTING DOWN EVERY WAY YOU CAN ESCAPE#THE EMPEROR IS ATHENA HER TRUST IS EARNED THROUGH RESPECT. HER TRUST THAT BRINGS YOU HOME#(the emperor is also argos the dog bc she flat-out refuses to die until she knows her loved ones are safe)
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CAUSE THIS IS THRILLER (bark), THRILLER (bark) NIGHT
Usopp's outfit is so funny for reals
He got the whole squad laughing
Luffy enablers at it again.... (Robin.... I know.....)
The humor panels so far have been so good!!! God this arc is so funny
HE SAID IT‼️‼️
They look like birds 😭😭
It's just too good... luffy taking cerberus and zombies what can't he do
It's just banger after banger what can I say
Franky feeling for other people because of his guilt complex and sanji lying through his teeth and pulling out the women excuse to seem unaffected... yeah
Look at them.... look how they ate
Omg joyboy reference?? (No)
Sanji is rubbing off on usopp.... also chopper noticing that is sogeking's weapon akdhaksjak
ANOTHER SLAY!!!!!
Their priorities: I'm not strong enough, there isn't enough food, and nami isn't here
Franky going from wanting to kill brook for his jokes to making a joke like his after he hears his backstory... exactly (Robin was already enabling him before the backstory even fdagjsfha)
Sanji is altering his body and actually being on fire to communicate to us how fucking mad he is..... I need more of him going insane I do I do
My god what is he doing ALDJALAJALA
AHSAHAHQHAH THEY ARE THE SAME!!! naaah sanji wouldn't force a woman to be his wife
You cant see me but I am nodding my head in agreement over and over
You don't understand he altered his body to communicate to us how mad he is. He inploded himself and then reconstituted again. Those germa 66 genes are insane
You tell em usopp!!!! The first of many girls you've scared into defeat!!! Akdjqknql
Zoro zombie regressed to not trusting robin akdjaks he's still in there
ROBI-CHO SUPLEX??? HELL YEAAAAAH
There is zosa- [GUNSHOT GUNSHOT GUNSHOT GUNSHOT]
Super frapper gong.... he is doing combo shots with frobin... omg.... parents....
Everything is so fun I'm having such a good time reading.... and then zosan angst like damn I am being fed well here
#in the anime the guys didn't say they wanted to die aldjlajala for the kids luffy just wants to turn into a clam#thriller bark is so funny.... 'worst arc' my ass.... it's funny as hell and then we get zosan angst. best thing ever#same with skypiea but there we got really nice relationships betwen characters and nolan x calgara homoeroticism for the ages#and LORE for the ages. not like the kuma incident won't be talked about in the history books but yeah#everyone calling absalom perv salom... yeah#sanji in that fucking penguin never gets old.... also HELLO LOLA#moira fought against kaido and lost akdjsksnks is that why he became a warlord? just like whitebeard defeated crocodile?? out of spite??#also what is the land of ice where moira got oars? he also mentioned it before too... i thot he was referring to ryuma so it was wano but n#the legend of the continent puller who built a nation of villains.... okay okay oars....#oars was killed 500 years ago.... ✍️✍️ this somehow feels important bc of its closeness to the void century etc#zombie luffy oars wanting sanjis food.... 🚬🚬🚬 of course.....#oars luffy maintaining his dream... yeah yeah. also namis outfits for this arc are so sickening.... i miss them already#the zombie generals being at absalom's wedding... thats so funny..#luffy oars is so funny aldjslsn just making himself a hat and steering his giant ship... of course#you guys think they are going to make sanji mad about the clear clear fruit in the opla or completely ignore it bc his reasoning is bad#like it makes sense with the wci backstory it does but that would be spoilers lmao. so its either he wants to peep on women or nothing#i love the greek chorus of the two zombies telling the audience how they are both as bad in that regard. amazing#did ryuma use french for his attack.... there is zosan everywhere for tho-[GUNSHOTS]#zombie ryuma's design is also cool as hell.... his blood is literally fire.... come on now....#also zoro says he wants to act like this fight didnt happen... is that why he says fuck all in wano to hiyori? damn. he said i put shame#in you and your country but i will keep it quiet bc you gave me a cool sword and fight and i am actually so honorable. thats him yeah...#zombie zoro and sanji remaining tfait being that they hate (love fighting) each other... there is zosa-[GUNSHOT GUNSHOT GUNSHOT]#i forgot how much oars destroyed them... after enies lobby they seem untouchable but without their captain there... the gears are turning..#also btw i cannot believe im gonna get an answer about why the skypieans and the shandians have wings. thats insane#i am enjoying luffy oars so much it is so fun. trying to enjoy it bc i know i won't be laughing anymore once sabaody kicks in.... fuck me..#usopp and franky wanting to wait for luffy to beat oars down but zoro and sanji know... and they will KNOW soon enough....#i forgor kuma asked about ace to nami... what is going on. kuma coming from the warlord meeting too.... did he want to warn him??#he wanted to inform moria about balckbeard becoming a warlord omg here we go.... also moria being racist towards kuma hello???#and he strictly follows the government.... until here bc he lets luffy go.... christ.... he asks about ace bc he knew what blackbeard did..#reading one piece
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A wild thing happened today
I was out with friends and their 6-month-old baby, and we drove to a park to go for a walk. As we were getting ready to leave the car my friend is suddenly like "Oh my god there's a bee in the car right near the baby!"
And I'm like, oh, I'm not afraid of bees. I'll deal with this
So I get out and open the door next to the baby's car seat, and my friend points out the insect in question.
That is not a bee. That is a wasp.
But, you know, in for a penny, in for a pound
So I put my hand in front of where the wasp is crawling and, without thinking, I start talking to it like
"C'mere buddy, climb up on my finger, I'm not gonna hurt you"
And it fucking DID
It CLIMBED ONTO MY FINGER
I slowly backed away from the car and the wasp flew off outside harmlessly and as it did I got the hugest adrenaline rush because
I AM FUCKING ALLERGIC TO WASPS WHAT THE FUCK WAS I DOING
#the wasp was super chill and not aggressive at all THANK GOD#but understandably my friend didn't want a stinging insect near her baby when we have no way of knowing if the kid has allergies or whatev#and even if there's no allergy you don't want your baby to be stung!!! because ow!!!#poor thing is going through teething she doesn't need more pain on top of that#anyway. another step in my journey of trying to be less afraid of bugs#i was downright giddy after#btw my allergy is not deadly but i get a lot of swelling/adema and it is extremely unpleasant#i guess if i was stabbed in the face or throat i might die? but that was unlikely in this situation#still! pretty scary!!#and pretty cool that the wasp was chill and was like 'oh is this how i leave the car? thanks i was lost' ykwim#mod post#bugs#insects#wasps#i am still a little scared of them TuT
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🗡 mad cowboy disease....
#‡ ooc#high noon tbt.#thinking of Them while walking to the shops... on my own little quest...#there may be typos but ignore them#listened through mars hn yone playlist i loved watching the 2 hr movie in my head#listening through my hn playlost now maybe ill make tals a spotofy thing too for easier listening....#got so many little scenes in my head#talon munching any lil bug/lizard critter they catch. whether they actually Need to eat is unspecified#but you know. probably. anyway thinking evilly at how i can describe their meals as either tantalising or DISGusting#talon being afraid of ending up an almalgam of feathers and sludge but ove talked abt that before#need to write more talon monologues or story times#reminiscing now. will add more later#talon trying their best to get through a Normal Human interaction on a bar or smth tryong to hide what they are and keep their hat low but-#and theres always a but- someone either catches a glimpse of theor face n compliments them or gets in theor way like 'hey-' or they catch#a glance at feathers or brimstone....#talon getting chased to be put in one of those carnie 'strange encounters' shows... they either do get caught or...#get rid of their would-be captors#time for more thoughts. i need to design talons demonic form and maybe even what their gradual corruption looked like 🤔#i also need to decide on a few factors abt how im treating their cape as tendrils instead... like if they naturally had 5 or lost one...#and how much control over individual segments they have#thinkin abt talon getting in trouble but not like. threat of death danger maybe a malevolent third party who wants them for something else#be it their blood or feathers or smth like that. maybe even after REDACTED and they get a bounty set by the sulfur king for REDACTED reason#to be brought back alive and hunters go after em......#oh. who can a demon slash half angel turn to in these trying times... 🥺😔 not that they want to rely on anyone#talon would rather die than rely on another creature for help. im kidding. :] or am i#thinking abt the thing i said to mars like. after their travels together talon tries to keep their distance from rell and yone but.#fate or something worse keeps bringing them back together. i said it better beforehand but anyway.#if its during this time of being hunted and they cross ways i can imagine talon not staying long at all or just turning 180 at the sight#part the fear the other two will join this hunt as well. the other part is that theyll be in danger if talon asks for help...#nor do they want to owe a debt to these two ough 😒
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU
#rambling#surprisingly this is not about jakob.. im just really consistent about my favorite character archetypes 😭😭#WARNING THE NOTES ON THIS ARE REALLY LONG I STARTED RAMBLING#“ouhh i have a headache i'll just lie down and rotate my blorbos in no general direction for a while until it goes away” and then boom.#serious plot considerations. 2 questions answered 24million new questions raised. this is specifically Not what i asked for.#so now im sitting here STILL dizzy running mental calculations on how i can get this bitch out of peril without reworking everything#but they literally keep dying in every timeline 😭😭 every single plausible road leads to them running off and screwing themself over#“character who doesn't realize they want to live until it's way too late to look back” VS#“character who is forced to live and handle the things they never though they'd survive long enough to deal with” FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.#fucking hell i have never had this much trouble writing a character as i have with them#they genuinely do just run off and do shit without my permission and then i have to pace for an hour or two wondering#“ok they wOULD do that. but should they. do i feel like i can confidently write that.”#im like constantly in this tug of war trying to get them to CHILL#but also they are absolutely my favorite character from the entire project. but like. FUCK GET BACK HERE#is death the most satisfying end to this arc? is someone who was Set on dying then NOT dying the most satisfying end to the arc?#how many bridges can you burn until you irreparably set yourself aflame too?#would ghost or revival plotline work?? would it make sense with the worldbuilding??#do i just Like Them enough to want them to not die?? where do i draw the line between personal bias and a good arc?#is death not feeling as impactful as survival solely because i've been writing for so long that it's lost the initial impact?#and other such plot considerations...#im gonna have such an easy time writing another character though 😭😭 because THAT character's dynamic in the second act#is to stare at character 1 and be like “why are you like this. i mean i know Why but can you chill. please.” and like damn bro me too#actually wait no i think kaey.a is the hardest character i've ever written i take it back#had to worry about his 20million facades AND his Actual feelings AND canon compliance. shit is hard#i still havent finished the k/aeya fic i started back when the chasm first released which is uhh. two years ago. oops.#i think i struggle writing emotionally repressed liars i think thats what this is 😭😭 anyways.#(voice of guy who has been obsessed with nonlinear narratives and tragedies for several years):#“is it too much to kill this character in a nonlinear exploration game with tragic elements”#like bitch what are you talking about 😭😭 YOU'RE the target audience here figure it out#sorry the notes on this are just my writing journal now apparently
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looking through dsmp characters' wiki pages and looking at the statuses of their pets and seeing "dead" "dead" "dead" "missing" "dead" "alive" "missing" "dead" vs. looking through qsmp characters' pets and seeing "alive" "alive" "alive" "alive" "alive" like god. server wracked with constant war and destruction vs island full of friends and family and love. hellmurder smp vs love and communication island. i don't know where i'm going with this it just makes me want 2 lay down and stare at the ceiling for a few hours
#qsmp#dsmp#like. man#dsmp constantly filled with danger at every turn and still people kept trying to love. they kept getting pets and making friends#knowing that at some point they would likely die somehow in some brutal manner in a war or used as blackmail etc etc etc#they kept trying. they kept trying to care and love and for some people that tendency was beaten out of them#but for others they kept it. and kept trying to keep things to love.#quesadilla island is not perfect but they are ALLOWED to love. they all CARE. they protect each other and their beloved pets#the only thing that might try to wrench that away from them is the federation but ther are many characters who hate the feds#and are just WAITING for a chance to jump at them to protect the people and things they care about#the dsmp characters fought to love and most of the time they lost. they gave up.#the qsmp characters have fought for love. they are still fighting for it and will continue to for as long as it takes for love to prevail#ARE YOU HEARING ME#whiskeys word soup
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*sips tea*
I want *him* to lose it. Again. I want grief to consume him and turn him unhinged...
First time? He screamed him to wake up, and cried when he lost her.
Second time? He got scarily angry, but still under control.
Third time is the charm they say...
(in tags some spoilers and more analisis)
#you know who im talking about...or at least homie does#still not over the differences he had with each character like omfg#one is trying to reach him after a breach happened in hopes for him to come back like s brother would look after#second person: the grief falls ON HIM he blames himself he blames him for not being there to keep her safe to protect her#he told her he would return only for him to return and out no one was waiting for him anymore not that person with his lighter who trusted#still not over the fact after those 2 incidents he lost hope in his mind he lost both...he wanted to die!#second event not person: the blame was on the system on the enemy they took his protege away from him#and he wanted BLOOD he starts getting angry ane bloodlust#is a good paralelism with him unlocking his god powers since Gods in that realm#arent supposed to have emotions and yet here he gets MAD#him using the railgun mode on the rifle was scary as fuck#NOW I WANT HIM TO GO FULL UNHINGED#choco speaks#choco rambles#choco rambles about tenkuu shinpan
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insane about lucina today
#tactician's log#awakening#imagine. you’re the ONE PERSON with the power to end the nightmare your world is living through#(technically one of two or three people but the others are your younger sibling and cousin and you won’t put that on them)#you grow up knowing this. your mother and aunt and the other adults in your life try to protect you from it for as long as they can#but already the sword is in your hands and the weight is on your shoulders#over and over you watch your father’s friends die just to buy time for you to grow up enough to do what he failed to#(all because he trusted his best friend too deeply)#and when you get to the end you find that it was all hopeless anyway. one of the gemstones is gone and there’s nothing you can do about it#and there’s no other way to fix things. your timeline is lost#but because you can’t stomach the thought of all of it being in vain you decide to go back in time to try and prevent it#just so there can be ONE timeline where the apocalypse never happens. where some version of you and your friends can grow up happy and safe#it makes me INSANE man#number 1 eldest daughter syndrome haver in the world i love her so much
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also. they are human. to be clear. they’re also just “not from around here” (earth)
#far future human companion babyyyyyy#they’ve never actually set foot on a planet before they meet the doctor. it’s a whole thing (<- is making this up as they type it)#deep space exploration. the kind of technology to Get You There but not fast enough that the people who started the journey will end it.#forgotten of course when that technology arrives. still drifting to their destination where humans have already made it.#because it cost more to go get them then to just let them coast to another galaxy.#born on a ship to die on a ship. and maybe the doctor arrives because something went Horribly Wrong. and that’s the only way they’ll ever#go anywhere else in their life.#knowing that they can’t go back. not for the usual ‘oh ill travel with you forever’ reasons but for more practical ones.#they will not be adjusted to the life that ship requires anymore. they would bring back diseases their fellow shipmates have lost immunity#to over generations. they will not be able to live on the same rations or the same limited air or the same awkward gravity.#the first week on the TARDIS is hell because they’re trying to recalibrate their body to Not Die the minute they touch down anywhere#let the doctor do some doctoring.#idk you see what im getting at here?#dw oc
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Incredibly frustrated by how condescendingly jaded my uncle can be but I’m being so brave about it <- not blowing him up with my mind even though I want to
#ra speaks#personal#I love him. but my dude. bruh.#made a comment abt how I should try working/volunteering w the homeless#after I commented on his tirade abt homeless ppl ‘gaming the system’ by getting arrested in the winter#to have somewhere warm w food to stay like ‘why are we not talking about how fucked it is that the homeless will fucking die if they don’t?#like sir. buddy. you do remember that I grew up on food stamp right? I have gone to a food bank as a recipient before.#I’ve volunteered at shelters and soup kitchens before. I know addicts and homeless people in town.#this isn’t some naive wide eyed college socialist ‘those poor homeless people are saints’ schitck#this is a tired university food pantry anarchist ‘aren’t you fucking tired of being cruel to people who make the best o thr circumstances?’#sorry you can no longer see the divine value of every human life and must endure the tragedy#of considering everyone not to your standard a lost cause.#some of us see the work to be done and will be doing it instead of wallowing in hate and pity.#shut up and get to work like the rest of us if you hate it so much.#it’s just like *strangled him* you see me twice a year dude I DO WORK AT A SOUP KITCHEN YOU IDIOT#I just don’t talk abt it because it’s just something I do sorry I thought making acts of charity your whole personality#was vain and frowned upon in christian society???#this makes my plans to ditch academia and go into fulltime aid work feel all the more. idk vindicated???#that’s not the right word but you get it. uncle t I love you but you know fuck all and have hardened your heart to the world.#god break that heart of stone you have and bless you with love for your fellow man. or whatever.#for context this convo happened like two years ago but I saw him last week and in light of recent personal revelations I’ve remembered it#core memory locked in ‘are you for fucking real uncle t?’#vocational woes
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merry krismas
#i really wanted to provide an id for this but i literally couldn't because not even i know what's going on here#but if anyone would like to attempt it i would appreciate it#anyway happy christmas!! sorry this is the only think i could make anything else I tried to do fell apart#it started with that suselle drawing that didn't save#and then a fanfic i had spent three hours writing on my PAPERWHITE KINDLE#just to get to the last fucking sentence and my kindle to just die out of no where with no warning because the battery is fucking jank#and lost all of my work apart from the first two paragraphs#so naturally i cried for half an hour and cursed to god because it was quarter past two#y'know as you do#so I might try and finish that again today? I still remember most of the story#but i might not be motivated enough sorry#i might publish the first two paragraphs because they're kind of ok but they're isn't much point#anyway sorry for rambling on my 'kris eats a video game' shitpost#robindoodles#robinrambles#robindoesntevenknow#kris dreemurr#kris deltarune#kris#berdly deltarune#berdly#krerdly#if you want it to be#it is implied in the last bit of the second panel but i cut it off with kris's dialogue on purpose#deltarune#deltarune fanart#fanart#comic#deltarune comic#undescribed
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