#for Barbara

[knight-in-sour-armor]

[ultimate-marysue]

It's raining nonstop where I am so I'm just picturing the Batfam during a flood.

Red Robin uploads a TikTok from the safety of a roof saying "watch him go!" As Red Hood keeps trying to drive his bike against the current. A big wave comes by and he's slowly dragged downhill. The caption reads "don't drive during floods".

Batman and Robin are on the ground helping civilians out of cars when the intensity doubles and in minutes Damian goes from wading knee deep in the water to swimming. The emergency batfloaties get triggered and he floats away as Bruce fails to grab him by half an inch. "Robin serenely drifting in the current" becomes a meme.

Someone takes a picture of a very flustered spoiler trying to squeeze the water out of her cape. The second she lets go the weight of the water makes her fall ass over backwards. Black Bat ends up giving her her waterproof cape.

Signal makes mirages of sharks in the water to scare the shit out of any criminals. Oracle uploads the recordings with Benny hill as background music. Bludhaven escapes the worst of the storm and Nightwing sends pictures to the group chat patting the barely wet concrete just to rub it in. He still slips on a puddle and eats shit, Barbara sends that to the group chat.

[incorrectbatfamandfriends]

Headcanon that since Jason can’t go out with his family publicly, what he does instead is show up in random disguises.

Bruce is chatting up some socialites at a gala, talking about the joys of fatherhood and how rewarding it is. Meanwhile he made eye contact with Jason disguised as a waiter twenty minutes ago, and is currently trying to stop his eye from twitching.

Dick is speaking to a third grade class as a part of the Bludhaven Police department outreach program, except when he walks in Jason is sitting behind the teachers desk, playing the role of substitute.

Babs can’t help but stare when Jason hands her a coffee from behind the counter of her favorite coffee shop. (His name tag reads Peter, and for a second she thinks she’s actually lost it).

Tim walks into Wayne Towers one day and on his way in, he waves to his secretary- lo and behold Marjorie has been replaced by Jason. It takes him three hours to notice.

Cass walks into ballet class to discover her teacher had to take a sick day- his replacement is Jason in a beret who talks in a terrible French accent the entire class, only to drop it at the very end to talk in a thick New Jersey accent. Her entire class talks about it for weeks.

Stephanie hails a cab on her way home one night, only to find Jason driving. She’s not sure how he pulled it off or how he got a cab, but her mind is effectively blown.

Duke is on a school trip to the natural history museum, and when the tour guide introduces himself, Duke can’t help but role his eyes. Jason gives a surprisingly good tour, even throwing in some tidbits about a robbery that went down just last week that the Signal stopped.

Damian’s encounter happens when he’s with Jon in metropolis. He’s watching Jon play baseball, and when Jon steps up to bat, he can’t help but notice a the umpire looks a little familiar.

[eroticlamb]

Geena Davis posing with a bug for a promotional shoot of "Beetlejuice", featured in Prevue magazine, 1988 ♡

[sedlex]

I'm not the biggest fan of hoops but... look at Barbara Domingos' routine. Just look at it.

[iggy-gotthisaccountunderduress]

listen having a favourite character is just embarrassing sometimes. yeah that’s my specialest little blorbo. yeah I’ve read every word of their stuff. yeah I think about them 24/7. yeah I project all my issues onto them and write fanfiction about them and have multiple playlists dedicated to them. And I’m here on your dash to once again tell you that I am still thinking about them bc I thought you needed to know that. you can just shoot me now.

[singswan-springswan]

In a happy world where Jason is legally resurrected and gets to go to college like he's always dreamed of

[robinhuntr]

Gothamites waking up to the loud ass Batmobile racing down the street at 3 am bc the local murder clown thought it would be funny to try something

[incorrectbatfam]

Alfred gets sick of Bruce breaking and losing stuff on patrol so he gets a label maker and starts naming items after the kids

Alfred: I got you a new phone, just like you asked. Its name is Jason. Try not to let it die.

Bruce, tearing up: Why would you say that—

[waveoftheocean]

wahoo finished this in time for superbat week day 5: tired dads!!

[galaxymagitech]

Batfamily Nickname Headcanons

Dick and Jason sometimes went by Dickie and Jay when they were younger. Bruce, Dick, Barbara, and Jason, who were around for this period, will occasionally use those nicknames. The younger Bats will not, because “it just feels weird.”

The first time Damian used Tim’s first name, he called him Timothy. Tim, who was incredibly sleep-deprived and in the middle of a League of Assassins case, thought it was Ra’s and reacted poorly (that is to say, he attempted to slash him across the face with his surprise bo staff knife, but Damian was saved by the fact that he’s over a foot shorter than his grandfather). Damian believed that Tim took offense and returned to calling him Drake. Tim filed the incident as a hallucination in his memories. This misunderstanding took an inordinately long time to clear up.

The nickname “B” was coined by an eight-year-old Dick after he accidentally called Bruce “Batman” following a civilian kidnapping. Thankfully, his words were slurred, so Bruce convinced the police he was saying “bad man” about the kidnappers. To avoid this mistake happening again, Dick started using “B” in situations where he wasn’t paying much attention to his words or was uncertain. As he grew older, he didn’t need the crutch anymore due to his compartmentalization skills, but he kept it as an affectionate nickname.

After Dick got into an argument with Bruce and Jason accidentally interfered in Dick’s work, Dick called Jason something in Tamaranean a couple times which basically equates to our understanding of “little shit”. Jason decided it sounded awesome. A couple months later, Jason asked Dick what it meant. Dick, who felt really bad, didn’t want to hurt Jason’s feelings and told him it meant “little brother”. Jason now calls his little brothers that word when talking to Starfire. She never corrects him, because she figures he has the correct translation and knows what he’s saying—Tim and Damian are indeed little shits.

[video320]

I drew the bat family

[amorkuku]

Damian tormenting Richard as a hobby 🧐

[incorrect-batfam-quotes-mostly]

Bruce: *Posts a super low-quality image to the family group chat*

Dick: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents

Jason: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

Barbara: Actually I did the math, Dick would have $225, not $0.15.

Steph: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)

Dick: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please

Steph: Sorry I only have a dollar

Dick: :(

Barbara: correction, Dick would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent

Steph: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

Damian: You can buy anything you want with $22,500

Jason: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice

Dick: Apply juice to what

Steph: Directly to the forehead

Tim: Great chat everyone

[demonicsuffrage]

Jason definitely tries his best to keep his siblings out of crime alley but they just. Don't listen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tim, arriving into crime alley while Jason's injured, to solve a case that Jason had stopped him from meddling in: Finally, He's not here

Jason, standing directly behind Tim, with a punctured lung and a gun full of horse tranquilisers: Boo

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jason, putting up a barricade in front of the alley: Stop coming into my territory already!

Dick, backflipping over the barricade and into Crime Alley: It's payback for when you cosplayed Nightwing and came into Bludhaven.

Jason: ...Fine

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damian, at family dinner: Todd, I demand that you allow me entrance to the alley-

Jason, spraying him with water like a misbehaving cat: no.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Steph, wearing camo print and openly walking into crime alley: You can't see me right now, so you can't kick me out

Jason:

Jason: Good one. You can come in for ten minutes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Barbara, trying to fly a drone over crime alley because Bruce wanted reports: This is foolproof

Jason, sniping down the drone: No.

Barbara: I jinxed it

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Duke just waltzes in and out because he works during the day and Jason doesn't. Cass also waltzes in and out because she blends so well with the shadows and he never spots her.