#every single song i either already loved or the show introduced it to me and now i love it
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starting a prayer circle to manifest house of wolves by mcr plays in yellowjackets during a hunt
#i know it came out in the 2000s but they used one that came out in 2019 in the wilderness timeline so there is still hope#i also would kill for back against the wall by cage the elephant during a hunt#i cannot wait to see what songs they use in s3 this show has the best soundtrack of any show ive ever watched its incredible#every single song i either already loved or the show introduced it to me and now i love it#i jumped outta my skin when they used cornflake girl i lost my mind i fucking love that song#yellowjackets
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apologies, i'm still angry abt TUA S4
so, if we take out all of the blatant issues with the season (character assassination, 'resolutions' that create more plotholes than they solve, rushed scenes that make no sense, side plots that go nowhere, raymond vanishing for no reason, etc etc), what are we left with? let's see:
fatphobia (multiple jokes made about 'chubby Diego', when David just looks hydrated and healthy)
SA played for jokes (it's clear that Klaus having sex while possessed is supposed to be funny, but he's being held hostage and forced to do this for money, when we already know he didn't even want his powers back??)
cheating
problematic / borderline problematic age gaps (either way you spin it, either Five is physically 20-26 while Lila is likely mid 40s, or Five is mentally 70s while Lila is mid 40s; Aidan was 19 while filming, and Ritu was 34)
waiting for the actor to come of age before introducing a romance (we already know what some fans can be like over Five/Aidan, this will not have helped; I would be horrified if I found out the show runners had planned a romance arc with a coworked 15 years older than me and then waited for me to turn legal age to execute it)
sexism (i was reluctant to call it that but i also don't know what else to call it - Lila basically had her agency stripped away to become the love interest two men fought over; Steve wanted Five to have a romance and didn't care who with - use Lila simply because she was there)
complete disregard of character trauma (Klaus being buried alive despite it having been mentioned in every prior season that he was locked in a mausoleum by Reginald, including literally being left to die)
possible overstepping of an actor's boundaries (i've not been able to verify this, but i've seen it said that robert sheehan has requested not to do sex scenes?) (still havent been able to prove this; wasn't an issue with other roles so... hesitant to leave it)
actors requests being ignored (David asked multiple times if the Lila cheating sideplot was required, but clearly it went ahead anyway)
bad cgi
that awful vomit montage
Reginald (im not quite calling it abuse forgiveness but uh. it's not far off tbh)
i don't even know what to call this, but basically told the Hargreeves the abuse they suffered was their fault because they shouldn't even exist??
what did i miss? (im sure there's something)
from the replies:
the song in the ep3 dance scene uses a slur for romani people (and is also about a man and an underage girl)
SA dismissal (it's literally never addressed that Allison SA'd Luther last season. like, at all. everything's just a-okay now!)
more sexism (Allison's arc was also reduced to serving men; there's a single line to explain that Ray left, with no mention of why (i could go OFF about this but this post isn't supposed to be about mishandling of characters); even after everything, all her bonding with Claire comes through Klaus's storyline. also, Sloane is just gone and nobody gives a shit - Luther has one line and that's it??)
so many issues with consent (all of the girls shown in the place Klaus works look drugged / Klaus doesn't want to be there and doing any of that, it's all against his wishes / they all get their powers back against their wishes - although they do tell Ben that wasn't his choice to make / Klaus gets his powers back against his will when Allison is pressured to do it to save his life)
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Underneath the Tree
Pairing: brother’s best friend!ellie williams x reader
Summary: you’re happy to be back in your hometown for christmas break, but that changes when an unexpected guest shows up at your house.
Author’s note: let’s pretend i posted this on time lmao anyways here’s some fluffy cliché and christmassy ellie content <3
• • • •
christmas had always been your favorite holiday. you loved everything about it; the food, buying presents, the decorations, the movies and every single tradition, but most importantly, the joy of it all and the coziness that time of year radiated.
you and your brother had just arrived home from college, so all you wanted to do was relax for a bit. you plopped down on one of the couches, letting out a big sigh.
“hey, i wanted to tell you that i invited a friend over to spend christmas with us,” your brother told you out of nowhere.
you frowned, confused, “oh, who?”
“her family went to visit one of her aunts, the one she hates, so i invited her here. mom and dad already know.”
“who is it?” you asked again.
“well—”
knock, knock.
you didn’t miss the weird glance he shot you before he went to open the door. you stayed on the couch, trying to heighten your hearing to figure out who it was.
the intrigued expression in your face morphed into a surprised one when you recognize the person’s voice. it belonged to none other than ellie williams, your brother’s best friend.
they met in orientation and immediately hit it off, yet you had never liked her. not when your brother first introduced you to her, not after the countless times she had been over at your apartment and certainly not now that she had crashed your favorite holiday.
she always found a way to mess with you, either by teasing you or doing stuff like using your favorite mug whenever she was over at your apartment or borrowing your hoodies without asking.
she really got on your nerves, and now she was at your house. you would’ve never imagined her standing in your living room and talking to your parents, but there she was.
you glanced up at her the moment her eyes fell on you, her characteristic cocky grin already making an appearance.
“hey.”
you just sent her a smile, one that only a blind person wouldn’t be able to tell was fake. after a short chit-chat, your parents left the room followed by your brother, who mouthed ‘be nice’ before leaving.
“happy to see me?” ellie asked once she checked you were alone.
“the happiest,” you replied, sarcasm violently dripping from your words.
ellie suppressed a laugh, clearly amused by how much her presence bothered you. “i promise you won’t even notice i’m here.”
you scoffed, “yeah, right,” you muttered before getting up from the couch and walking past her. “don’t go in my room,” you warned her before leaving her alone on the living room.
“you’re not gonna show me around?” she asked, raising her voice a little.
you heard her snicker and it was almost impossible for you not roll your eyes at the sound. fuming, you went to the kitchen in search of your brother.
“thanks for the warning, dumbass,” you scowled at him. he knew how you felt about ellie, but he didn’t care in the slightest.
he laughed, stuffing his mouth with multiple cookies. “you weren’t going to let me invite her if i told you.”
“exactly!”
“get over it. she’s cool, you’d like her if you actually gave her a chance.”
you huffed, “whatever.”
after that, you went to your room. you put on your favorite christmas playlist as you unpacked, but you were far too distracted to actually listen to the songs.
you wouldn’t go as far as calling ellie your enemy, but she was close to that. you just couldn’t stand her, that was why whenever she visited your brother at your apartment you stayed in your room or left, not wanting to be the victim of her constant teasing.
suddenly, the door swung open. your head shot up, alarmed. ellie was staring back at you just as surprised as you were.
“what are you doing?” you asked, annoyed.
“oh, i thought this was the guest room.”
“that’s the guest room,” you pointed to the door right across yours. “now, if you’ll excuse me—”
“you should come downstairs, i’m about to bake cookies.”
a laugh escaped your lips as you grabbed your phone to pause the music. “you are making cookies?”
ellie leaned on the doorframe, a small smile forming on her lips, “yeah, why?”
“you don’t seem like the type, that’s all.”
“yeah, well, i’m full of surprises. you’ll see.”
with that, she left. you stared at where she had been standing a second ago, completely unaware of the goofy smile on your lips. you went back to your task, too caught up in your mind to realize you hadn’t pressed play on the music.
a while later, you finished unpacking and straightening up your room in the process. the smell of freshly baked cookies made you practically float to the kitchen and you could almost hear them calling your name. trying your best to not make a sound, you stood on your tiptoes and went to grab one.
“those are for later,” ellie’s voice came out of nowhere, startling you for the second time of the day.
you immediately turned around, narrowing your eyes at her, “this is my house.”
“and those are my cookies,” she retorted, crossing her arms beneath her chest. “but fine, you can grab one.”
“just like that?”
“do you want to fight a duel over it or something?”
you rolled your eyes, reaching over to grab one of the cookies. you chose the one with the candy cane shape and took a bite just as you walked past her.
god, that’s good.
“how is it?” ellie asked, following you closely behind.
“there’s no way you made this,” you said before sitting down on the big couch.
“i did!”
“i’ll ask my mom.”
“fine, she made them. i only passed her the ingredients,” ellie admitted, rolling her eyes. she sat down next to you and watched as you turned on the tv. “what are we watching?”
“well, i was going to watch home alone.”
“cool, let’s.”
“only if you keep quiet.”
ellie layed back on the couch, nodding at your words, “i promise.”
surprisingly, she kept her word and didn’t utter a sound, but you were still fully aware of her company. ellie didn’t miss the quick glances you shot at her from time to time.
“what?” she asked, turning her head to you.
“huh?”
“you’re looking at me.”
“no, i’m not,” you furrowed your eyebrows and looked back at the tv, but you could still feel ellie’s stare on you. with a sigh, you gazed back at her. “are you going to watch the movie or not?”
“i could ask you the same thing,” ellie replied, eyes sparkling with amusement.
you looked away from her, “shut up.”
ellie just chuckled lightly at you, choosing not say anything else and pay attention to the movie. she didn’t tear her eyes away from the screen until forty minutes later, when a weight on her shoulder distracted her. confused, she looked to the side.
it surprised her to see you had fallen asleep on her. you were softly snoring away, looking as peaceful as she had ever seen you. it was the first time you were that close to her and she couldn’t help but think how horrified you’d be if you knew what you were doing.
ellie watched what was left of the movie sitting impossibly still, trying not to wake you up. once the credits rolled in, she catiously moved you off of her and left you in a comfortable position before standing up.
she watched what was left of the movie impossibly still on her spot, trying not to wake you up. once it ended, she catiously moved you off of her and left you in a comfortable position before standing up.
you woke up a while later, wrapped in a warm blanket that wasn’t there before. you were completely disoriented, not knowing where you were or what had happened when it suddenly hit you.
you sat up straight on the couch, looking around and seeing the tv turned off.
“god,” you whispered as you hid your face in your hands, embarrassed.
“go wake your sister up and tell her dinner’s ready,” you heard your mother say from the dining room.
“i’m up!” you shouted back, mentally preparing yourself to face ellie again.
everyone was already sitting at the table, looking at you with amused smiles.
“you should’ve woken me up sooner,” you groggily complained, taking a seat next to ellie.
“but you looked so adorable,” ellie said to you, leaning closer so only you could hear.
you weren’t a violent person, but all you wanted to do in that moment was to punch that stupid grin off her face.
“i’m not in the mood for jokes, ellie,” you glared at her before setting your gaze on your plate.
“who said i was joking?”
you looked back at her, but she had already engaged in another conversation with your brother.
you and ellie didn’t exchange any more words, but you got to know her a little bit better due to the million questions your parents asked her. you learned that she was actually not that bad and you certainly liked her better when she wasn’t constantly teasing you.
even though you had taken a nap, you were still incredibly tired so you went to your room after helping cleaning up. once you slipped into your favorite pajamas you were ready to sleep, but a knock on your door interrupted you.
you didn’t expect to see ellie standing on the other side.
“uh, something wrong?”
ellie shook her head, “no, we’re just about to watch a movie and i though i’d let you know in case you wanted to watch it with us.”
“oh, thanks, but i’m really tired so…”
“you’re going to sleep already? do you need me to lend you my shoulder again?”
the polite smile you had instantly disappeared and an annoyed expression taking took over your features at her taunting.
“goodnight,” you closed the door on her face, but that didn’t stop the sound of her laughter from reaching your ears.
you woke up the following morning with the sound of your family chattering downstairs, with the addition of ellie’s voice. you could’ve sworn she said your name but, having just woken up, you told yourself you had probably heard wrong.
ellie was enjoying her breakfast when she heard noises upstairs and, as a reflex, she looked up. your brother noticed, so he sent her an inquisitive look.
“what?” he asked her.
“i heard noises, i think she’s up.”
“yeah, i know. you just seem very aware of whatever my sister does,” he pointed out before taking a sip of his coffee.
“i’m just a very observant person, that’s all.”
“you, observant? you’re zoned out every time i try talk to you,” he said incredulously.
“that’s on purpose, i just don’t wanna talk to you.”
their little quarrel stopped once they saw you come in, staying suspiciously quiet. you narrowed your eyes at them as you sat down, their eyes following you.
“what?” you glanced at them.
“nothing,” ellie replied as she took a sip of her hot chocolate.
“hey, can you pass me the—” you suddenly went quiet when you noticed something that snapped the sleepiness out of you. “that’s my mug!”
ellie froze on her spot just as she was about take another sip, “uh…”
“let her use it, she’s a guest!” your mother told you. “she probably didn’t know it was yours when she grabbed it.”
“but she always does this—”
“she’s a guest,” your mother repeated.
you scoffed as your eyes fell on the girl in front of you. as expected, she was completely amused by the situation.
“i’m a guest,” ellie pronounced the words with that mocking tone that drove you crazy.
“you’re really annoying, you know that?”
your brother silently watched the scene unfold in front him. he noticed the way you were trying to hide a smile and how ellie was unable to do so. there was a huge grin on his friend face, one that only seemed to appear whenever you were around.
that was actually the first thing that made him pay more attention to your relationship’s dynamic. ellie became another version of herself with you, one that was unusually smiley and much more of a tease than she normally was.
“next time i’ll go to your house to use your favorite mug.”
“i don’t have a favorite mug.”
your family listened closely to your bickering, laughing to themselves as you and ellie kept fighting. you were like that for the rest of the day, making fun of each other and engaging in harmless and playful arguments.
that afternoon you decided to make gingerbread houses, but it soon turned into a deadly competition in which only you and ellie were participants.
it all started when ellie mocked the christmas traditions you loved so much, calling them dumb. you challenged her by saying she only thought that way because she wouldn’t be good at them. your words brought up ellie’s competitive side, so she bet that her gingerbread house would kick yours’ ass.
“oh, you’re going down,” the evil chuckle the came out of you would’ve made her laugh in another situation, but ellie was too focused on winning.
much to your dismay, ellie was weirdly artistic and, apparently, good at everything. her house ended up being much better than yours, so you had to listen to her bragging about it for what was left of the day.
christmas was getting closer and closer and, to your surprise, having ellie there wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. in fact, you actually enjoyed having her around.
she was nicer than you would’ve imagined, really funny and had many different interests, which were fun to learn about when they were explained by her. you still found her slightly annoying since her habit of making fun of you never went away, but you were definitely getting used to it.
“you’re heading out?”
you looked up at the sound of ellie’s voice. “yeah, christmas shopping,” you replied as you wrapped a big scarf around your neck.
“oh, cool. i’m coming with you.”
you let out a small laugh, “no, you’re not.”
“i have to buy presents for the kind family who let me spend christmas with them, that includes you, the kindest of them all.”
you rolled your eyes at her evident sarcasm, “why don’t you go with my brother?”
“i need your help on what to get him,” ellie tried to convince you, but you were still hesitant. suddenly, an idea came to her mind. “c’mon, where’s the christmas spirit?”
christmas spirit.
using that card on you was low, it was obvious you wouldn’t resist.
you let out a sigh, but immediately gave in, “fine, let’s go.”
“you’re so easy to convince.”
“don’t make me regret it.”
the drive to the mall consisted in you singing whatever song came on the radio and ellie looking at you through the corner of her eye while staying strangely quiet. she hadn’t even tried to make fun of you, not even once.
“what should i get your parents?”
“you don’t have to get them anything, ellie, really.”
the mall was packed with people doing last minute christmas shopping, but you couldn’t exactly complain considering you were doing the exact same thing.
ellie followed you closely, “if you don’t help me i’ll buy them whatever crap i see first.”
“okay, do that.”
ellie groaned, “oh, c’mon.”
she kept struggling to find a way to convince you, completely oblivious to the smile you had on your lips. you had decided to help her from the beginning, but seeing her in distress was very entertaining for you.
you wandered around for a while, going into every possible store. you bought presents for everyone, except for the girl beside you.
“stay here, i have to do something,” you told her.
“really? what’s that?”
“it’s private.”
ellie hummed, “how private?”
“what?”
“why can’t i go with you?” she questioned.
“because you can’t.”
“wait, are you going to buy me a present?”
you huffed, “no.”
“you don’t have to lie.” ellie leaned in closer to you, “i know santa isn’t real,” she whispered.
you pushed her away from you as she laughed. you began walking away, ellie hurriedly catching up to you.
“what are you going to get me?”
“nothing if you keep being a pain in the ass,” you dryly replied.
“fine, go. i guess i’ll just wait here,” she pointed to an empty bench. “don’t be long.”
“don’t tell me what to do.”
ellie watched you leave with a smile plastered on her face. she sighed, laying back on the bench as she impatiently waited for you to be back. she had already picked up a present for you in one of the many stores you visited. she didn’t know how she managed to pull it off, but she was insanely proud of herself. it was difficult for you not to notice something, you had eyes everywhere.
after what seemed an eternity for ellie, you went back to find her. you almost laughed at how tired she looked, maybe christmas shopping wasn’t as fun for others as it was for you.
“bored?” you asked, amused.
“i think i actually fell asleep at one point.”
“i’m sorry,” you chuckled. “but we’re done! let’s go.”
ellie laughed softly at the amount of energy you still had in you. she felt completely exhausted. shopping was one of the things she disliked the most, especially during the holidays. still, she had fun.
maybe she didn’t hate shopping as much as she thought, or maybe your company would make her enjoy literally anything.
“wait,” ellie grabbed your arm and pulled you down, making you sit next to her. “aren’t you tired?”
“not really,” you shrugged your shoulders. “but we can rest for a bit if you want.”
“great,” she replied, crossing her arms and laying back on the bench again.
you copied her action, looking around the mall and paying extra attention to the lovely christmas decorations. you threw your head back, noticing something hanging above you.
mistletoe.
your eyes widened as you sat up straight, catching ellie’s attention. she turned her head to you, furrowing her eyebrows.
“you okay there?”
“uh, yeah. why?”
“you’re looking a little tense, that’s all.”
“i’m not tense, i’m just cold.” you made the mistake of shooting a quick glance at the mistletoe. ellie noticed, of course.
she tried her best to suppress a smile, but she failed miserably, “ah, i see.”
the way she looked at you caused a strange flutter in your stomach, which made you shift uncomfortably in your place.
“i’m not kissing you, ellie.”
“why not?”
her almost immediate question took you by surprise, “what do you mean why not?”
“i mean, why not?”
“i don’t know. you’re you.”
“yeah, and you’re you. you love christmas traditions.”
“you don’t. you said they were dumb.”
“yeah, but i’m not, like, totally opposed to them.”
you stayed quiet, staring into those green eyes of hers. your gaze wandered down to her lips and it lingered there for a moment before something else caught your attention.
“you have freckles,” you pointed out.
her eyes darted from your lips to your eyes, “you didn’t know?”
“this is the closest i’ve ever been to you.”
ellie’s mouth curved into a smile, wanting you to be even closer. she noticed the way your eyes were back on her lips, so she took it as a sign that you wanted it just as much as her.
it felt impossible for you to look away, you were completely enthralled by her. there was something pulling you closer to her, you couldn’t control it.
“for christmas’ sake, y’know?”
“you can’t keep using christmas as a way to manipulate me,” you whispered.
ellie took the initiative and leaned in first. you instantly closed your eyes at the contact, eyebrows slightly burrowed as you melted into the soft, slow kiss. it didn’t last long, but the sensation stayed with you after pulling away.
“um…” was all that you could say, eyes a bit widened.
ellie sent you a nervous smile, “you gotta respect christmas traditions, right?”
“right.”
on the drive back home the tension was palpable, but neither of you dared to mention the kiss again and acted as if nothing had happened. you certainly wouldn’t be the one to bring it up, so you tried your best to forget about it and trick your own mind into thinking it had been just an hallucination.
on the other hand, ellie couldn’t and wouldn’t stop replying the moment in her head. she wasn’t exactly sure if she had done the right thing, but she knew she didn’t regret it. not one thought crossed her mind in that moment, she didn’t think about what would happen next or what would your brother do if he found out. she went for it because that was what she had been wanting to do for a while.
on christmas morning, the house was dead quiet. everyone was still asleep, except for you and ellie. after making yourselves more presentable, you stepped out on the hallway at the same time. you almost gasped when you opened the door and ellie was right across from you, there was a similar expression on her face.
things had been awkward between you two. you didn’t ignore each other, but you didn’t talk as much as before. she had stopped making fun of you and you treated her more politely than you had ever done.
“good morning,” you softly said.
“hey,” she greeted with a half smile. “merry christmas.”
your eyebrows rose a little when you realized you had forgotten what day it was.
“right, merry christmas,” you grinned, fiddling with your fingers. “do you want to have breakfast?”
“sure, yeah.”
you both went downstairs and walked towards the kitchen, but ellie stopped by the living room. you turned around and watched her go to the christmas tree. she looked back at you, pointing at the wall where five christmas stockings were hung up. next to the one with your initial, there was one with an embroidered letter ‘E’.
“you bought me a stocking.”
“how’d you know it was me?”
ellie tilted her head to the side, “seriously? you’re like christmas personified.”
her compliment earned a soft giggle from you. you missed the adoring look she gave you when you looked down. it was hard to make you shy, which is why ellie felt over the moon when she accomplished it.
“thank you,” ellie gave a sincere smile, which faltered a little once she saw you trying to avoid eye contact. it had been that way ever since the kiss happened and it was driving her crazy.
“you’re welcome,” you grinned, looking into her eyes.
oh, ellie wasn’t ready for that. she felt her heart rate pathetically increase and she tried her best to look unaffected.
“we’re okay, right?” she awkwardly asked you.
“yes, why wouldn’t we be?”
“it’s just… it’s been kind of weird since, y’know, the kiss. i’m sorry if it bothered you, we can just forget it happened—”
iin that moment, the sound of your brother coming downstairs stopped you. you sent her an apologetic look before he barged in, loud as he always was.
“you didn’t open any presents yet, did you?” your brother asked you, narrowing his eyes at you.
“uh, no. we— we were waiting for you, guys,” you said just as your parents appeared.
you watched your family open their presents and tell you to open yours, but you were too busy thinking about your previous conversation with ellie. you glanced at her, hoping she would be already looking at you, but she wasn’t.
with a sigh, you grabbed a box from underneath the tree, one that had ellie’s name on it. you walked over to her and took her by her hand before discreetly dragging her out of the room.
“i’m sorry i’ve been acting weird, i guess i just— well, i—” you struggled to put together an actual sentence under ellie’s stare. she tilted her head to the side, waiting for you to continue. “god, don’t look at me like that.”
“why? do i make you nervous?” she taunted, a teasing grin spreading over her lips.
“ellie,” you complained, throwing your head back.
she laughed, “i’m sorry, i’m sorry.”
“dumbass,” you muttered, frowning. “what i’m trying to say is, i’m sorry. i should’ve been more upfront.”
“more upfront with what, exactly?”
“with how i feel.”
ellie’s breath hitched in her throat, “and how do you feel?”
“i like you.”
“you do?”
“yeah,” you gave her a smile. “unless you don’t like me back, then i don’t.”
ellie chuckled lightly and, without hesitation, she gently grabbed your face with one hand and brought you closer to her, giving you the kiss she had been dreaming about ever since your lips left hers at the mall.
your mind went blank, nothing else mattered. not the possibility of your family seeing you or the fact that kissing ellie would’ve been the worst thing imaginable a week back.
things had drastically changed.
you didn’t know when or why it happened exactly, but you seriously liked her. maybe when you saw how well she treated your parents, or how much she cared for your brother. maybe it was the way she looked at you whenever she made a joke to see if you’d laugh, or the fact that you shared practically the same taste in music.
there were many, many reasons for you to like her, yet you still couldn’t believe it was actually happening.
all of a sudden, you pulled away, leaving ellie with her lips puckered, “open your present.”
you placed the perfectly wrapped gift in between her hands, bragging about having wrapped it yourself since the guy from the store wasn’t very good at it.
you watched as ellie tried her best not to rip the wrapping paper and open it carefully.
“it’s okay if you rip it,” you clarified.
“no, you wrapped it.”
once she finally opened it, a smile began spreading across her lips. on her hands, there was a mug. it was similar to the one you had on your apartment, with different little and delicate drawings of cats. the only difference was that yours had details in dark red and hers in deep blue. there was also a handwritten card that read ‘i hope this becomes your favorite one (just so i can use it)’.
a laugh escaped her lips, rolling her eyes as she brought you in for a hug. “thank you, i love it.”
“yeah?”
“yup. i’ll keep using yours, though.”
“it’s fine, i’ll use yours.”
#ellie williams x you#ellie williams fluff#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams tlou2#ellie williams imagine#ellie williams x female reader#ellie x fem reader#ellie williams x y/n#ellie williams#tlou2 fluff#ellie tlou2
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our beloved summer | jjk (07)
You made a vow to hate Jeon Jungkook ever since he packed up and left you without a single explanation, but when he shows up at your door after years of radio silence, it turns out that maybe your resolve isn’t as strong as you thought.
pairing: producer!jungkook x songwriter!reader genre/warnings: exes au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, swearing, mentions of oc's mother because we know girlie is hella traumatized, mentions of drinking, mentions of an almost physical fight, abandonment issues, jk forgets to practice safe driving for 2 seconds, and uhmmm kissing 🤫, anddd that cliffhanger? 👀 rating: 18+ (minors dni) word count: 10.8k note (1): this is the longest it has taken me to update obs and i do feel pretty guilty about that. but it's finally here now and this is one of the chapters that i'm the most nervous about posting. massive thanks to @daechwitatamic and @/wintaerbaer (edited 2024: crossed out but not removed bc even tho she plagiarized obs afterward, she did beta this for me so i guess i still gotta give her that lmfao) for beta-ing this for me or else i would've screamed cried thrown up and scrapped the whole thing, and to @jeonwiixard for being a wonderful cheerleader as i was writing this, and to everyone in my beloved obs discord server for always being so sweet and kind and putting a smile on my smile every day since the server was created. also to my sunshine ☀︎ for introducing me to the song mentioned below bc HELLO is it not just one of the most obs coded songs ever. love you all my babies <3
series masterpost / playlist ; moodboards ; taglist join our OBS discord server ✨
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Somewhere in the multiverse There's a me and you that works We never fuck it up We're out there still in love Somewhere in the multiverse Maybe that's enough
multiverse - Maya Manuele ft. PEMRBOKE
Sometimes, whenever you look up at the moon at night, you wonder if Jungkook is doing the same thing.
Even when you fall out of love with someone, it still hurts. It hurts because you once loved them so much it felt like the sky would collapse if you couldn’t be with them. It hurts because the love wasn’t taken from you, but rather it started slipping away on its own, more and more each day until you realize you’re holding onto nothing when there once was everything.
You can’t say that you’re too familiar with that kind of hurt though. You’ve never fallen out of love before.
You don’t think Jungkook is too familiar with it either, at least not when he left you.
You wonder if he thinks about you from time to time and gets sad. You think he does, because you know that he loved you. Something ended for him too. The memories that you shared were his memories too.
You hope that it’s painful for him whenever thoughts of you cross his mind, because that would mean that he cares. That a part of him still cares.
And if he still cares, then he might come back.
Despite the front that you try to parade around, there is a part of you that will always leave your heart vacant for him, regardless of whether or not he would return. It’s a scary thought, one that you would rather avoid at all costs, one that says there will be no one that you love more than you loved Jungkook. Maybe there can’t be another person that you will love at all.
You can come back quietly, like the wind slipping through the crack I leave in the window at night; or you can announce your return resoundingly like a sudden downpour quenching the summer heat. I don’t care. I kept your side of the bed empty and warm, waiting for you to come back. Hoping that you would come home.
[08:47] Yoongi: sure you don’t want me to drive you there? [08:48] Yoongi: i can pick you up in 30 [08:52] You: positive 🤧 i told you i already booked the train. it’s only 4 hours away [08:53] You: i’ll survive, yoongs [08:55] Yoongi: did you not watch Train To Busan? [08:56] You: ? [08:57] Yoongi: what if there’s a zombie apocalypse [09:00] You: yoongi if there’s a zombie apocalypse, how is your CONVERTIBLE supposed to keep me safe [09:01] Yoongi: i’ll put the roof up [09:02] You: stop talking [09:02] You: please stop talking. [09:03] Yoongi: 😡😡😡 [09:03] You: 😇 [09:03] You: gotta get dressed now though. i’ll see u when i get back? :) [09:05] Yoongi: fine [09:06] Yoongi: safe travels. text me when you get there :)
You plop onto your bed with a sigh, glancing at the bag that’s already packed and sitting near your wardrobe, lonely. You stay like that for a while, contemplating whether or not you should bail at the very last minute.
It was not on your bingo card that you’d be here, agonizing over your ex-boyfriend’s brother’s wedding. Nope. Absolutely no one saw it coming.
For fuck’s sake, why would they invite you to a wedding? A celebration of love? It feels like you’re being forced onto a prank show, just waiting for someone to jump out and scream in your face.
You learned that the wedding was for close friends and family only, so it would be a relatively small event, which makes it even more confusing why you were also asked to join. Maybe the world is changing too rapidly and you’re just a little old-fashioned for it, but you really don’t understand why your ex-boyfriend’s family would want you there.
Taehyung and Jimin were invited too; they’re Jungkook’s best friends after all. They’re practically an extension of the family, Jungkook’s brothers by choice. But Taehyung doesn’t come back from his work trip until the day of the wedding, and Jimin… Well, he just doesn’t want to go to a Busan wedding in the middle of winter.
So why are you even going?
You could’ve declined. Said you couldn’t attend because the invitation came in so late. Made up a work trip or a family emergency. There’s a plethora of excuses you could’ve used.
Or you could’ve simply said no. That would’ve been perfectly fine too. No one would even need to ask why.
But maybe it was because his mother had customized the invite with her own handwriting in the back. You would’ve missed it if you hadn’t spent hours meticulously studying the card like someone was going to quiz you. It wasn’t anything special - just We hope to see you there - but you think you’d feel really bad to decline after she’d made the extra effort to ask you to come.
When you told Yoongi that you would be attending Jungkook’s brother’s wedding, he didn’t seem upset. Still cool as a cucumber. Although if he was bothered by the announcement, you don’t think he would’ve let it show. It did take him a minute to take it in, but then he just pecked your cheek and asked if you could bring a plus-one. You both knew that you wouldn’t even if that was an option.
Pushing your body off the bed, you drag yourself to the bathroom to splash some water on your face. Then sunscreen. Then change into the clothes you’d already picked out last night. Your train doesn’t leave for another hour and fifteen minutes, but you want to be there at least twenty minutes early just in case. This is one of your only good habits.
You rub your eyes when you finally haul yourself outside, thinking you must still be dreaming because what is Jungkook’s car doing here?
You blink a few times, expecting the vehicle to disappear in a puff of white smoke.
Spoiler alert: It doesn’t.
The car is in front of you, but the man is nowhere to be found.
You stand there dumbfoundedly, contemplating whether you should wait it out for a little bit to see if he’s actually here. He comes running up to you a couple minutes later, holding two paper cups in his hands, one of them a chai latte. A memory you’d buried long ago comes rushing to the surface. It’s too early for you to be feeling.
“Hi,” he says, his warm breath coming out in a huff of smoke in the crisp morning air.
“Hi?” you mutter dumbly when he trades the bag in your hand for the drink. There’s a moment where you’re genuinely baffled, wondering if this is a memory reel playing right before your eyes. This is your Jungkook, wearing that same old smile whenever he used to come bounding up your dorm building so you could walk to the library together, where he would hang out with you during your shift if he didn’t have classes. “What are you doing here?”
You don’t remember telling him what time your train was, so he’d probably badgered it out of Taehyung or Jimin somehow.
“I thought I could drive us there,” he says. “I texted you about it.”
Well, that explains it. You don’t bother with his dozens of messages anymore. “Oh, uhm, I already booked the train.”
This doesn’t seem to faze him at all. “Free cancellation up to 15 minutes before departure.” Jungkook grins, clearly eager despite your obvious reluctance. It’s too early for this, whatever the hell this is.
When you told him that you had RSVP’d yes to the invitation, he was surprised that you even knew about the wedding. He even seemed nervous that day.
“What if I’d already left?” you ask.
He blinks, then stammers like a confused child. It’s cute, and you have to mentally slap yourself over the head for even thinking that.
“Then I’d go after you.”
How? you scoff internally. Unrealistic.
Regardless, not even an hour ago, you were declining Yoongi’s offer to drive you there. Now, you’re standing here, in front of your ex-boyfriend, contemplating whether or not you should go with him.
“Let’s go,” he says after a minute. “We don’t wanna be stuck in traffic.”
“I haven’t said yes.” Yet. “It’s a 4-hour drive.”
You don’t have to clarify what you mean. He understands it.
You both just stare at each other for a moment, the tension suddenly thickening with every passing second. Four hours on the road. Four hours alone in a car with Jungkook. That’s about two hundred minutes more than you think you can handle.
It’s like he can see right through you. “Don’t think about it,” he says, voice dropping lower. “It’s just a weekend. Everything will still be here for you to think about when we get back.”
In your head, it translates to: All of our shit will still be here when we get back. You can keep being mad at me then.
You hope that’s not true. You hope that when you get back, the things that keep you up at night will simply cease to exist. That in the two days you’ll be gone, a genie will materialize and solve all your problems for you.
Either way, it’s probably for the best that you aren’t mean to him this weekend. You’re stuck with him for the next 48 hours or so; it’ll only stress you out even more if you channel all of your energy into tormenting him. Besides, you’re already the ex girlfriend who has no place alongside his family. You don’t want to be the dark cloud raining on everyone’s parade too.
Maybe you’d already made up your mind when you let him take the bag from you.
For the first half of the drive, you were unconscious.
It’s a useless superpower that you have, the ability to fall asleep anywhere - literally anywhere, including in the passenger seat of your ex-boyfriend’s car while he escorts you to his hometown. Melatonin gummies manufacturers hate you.
You could’ve slept the whole drive, but around the second hour mark, you were startled awake when your body jostled forward, straining against your seatbelt uncomfortably. There was an arm trying to hold you back, despite the seatbelt having done its job well.
“Fuck,” Jungkook curses before he turns toward you, worry written all over his face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, are you okay?”
You blink, still half asleep. “I’m okay,” you say. The minivan that Jungkook almost rear-ended continues on its merry way, carrying what seems to be a family of five. “What happened?”
He sighs, his outstretched arm retreating back to his side. “I got a bit distracted, that’s all.”
You take in your surroundings then. There’s barely any other cars in sight, no tacky billboard that sticks out like a sore thumb to catch your attention. There’s just the freeway, stretching on empty for all you can see.
“By what?” you ask.
“Nothing,” he says. “Go back to sleep. I’ll wake you when we get there.”
See, you have the superpower of falling asleep anywhere and everywhere, but once you’ve been woken up, it’s not as easy to fall back asleep.
That, and the fact that you’re hungry as shit.
You open your mouth, about to say no, about to offer to drive the rest of the way if Jungkook is tired, but your stomach doesn’t let you get a word out. It growls, filling the space of the car, making you want to chuck yourself out the fucking window and run all the way back to the city. This wouldn’t have happened had you taken the train, because if you had, there would’ve been food services and no one would be subject to hearing your stomach sing like it’s chewing out a small puppy in there. Life is nothing but an endless pit of embarrassment and despair.
Your arms hold themselves tighter around your frame, practically squeezing into your abdomen as you will it to please, please, please be quiet. Jungkook stares at you, and you can tell by the teeny tiny quirk of his lips that he’s trying to bite back a smile. He’s relaxed, but there’s still something hesitant on his face. It takes him a minute before he finally throws the question out.
“Do you want to go to that guksu place that we used-” that we used to go to, “you know the place. The one that’s right off the freeway?”
The sun is out today. The sky unfolds endlessly just outside the window, coloring blue everything your eyes land on. There are strips of clouds scattered here and there, like delicate strokes of white paint on an azure canvas. Even the winter cold has to soften.You bite into your cheek. Don’t think, that’s what he had told you.
Not much about this quaint restaurant has changed. The quirky decorations are still where they used to be, the windows still the same unique stained glass that you never came across anywhere else. You remember the elderly woman who runs the place, even if she doesn’t have a single clue who you are. The golden retriever you used to fawn over every time you stopped by, sits quietly by the door and watches the cars pass by, his fur now graying as weariness begins to settle into those old bones.
You would’ve been displeased if the place had changed, because, well, you don’t like change. But then again, this familiarity is dangerous. It tricks you into thinking that everything is still the same, even you and him. Deludes you into believing that you’re still in love and that he’ll walk out of here holding your hand.
Regardless, the first spoonful has you biting back a smile.
“How is it?” Jungkook asks.
It makes you feel all warm inside, and then a little sad, nostalgic.
“Tastes just the same,” you tell him simply.
“Hmm.”
He lets you satisfy your hunger in peace. It’s the least he can do anyway.
There’s a wall near the back of the restaurant, where people could hang polaroids of themselves and cute handwritten notes. You think if you dig through the hundreds of photos scattered across the space, you might be able to find you and Jungkook there, if you two haven’t already been thrown out long ago to make room for new memories.
He pays for your food after you’re both finished, despite some protesting on your side. As you leave, you’re busy thinking that if you could have a moment to marvel at that far-back wall of memories, if you could find a photo of you and him there, you would probably sneak it into your coat pocket.
It’d be another thing to add to your pile of Jungkook memorabilia - the old clothes in the back of your closet, the stack of dusty polaroids at the bottom of your drawer. You wonder if he keeps anything of yours, maybe an old t-shirt that you forgot to take back. It’s probably unlikely, but a girl can hope.
You miss the way Jungkook glances back, thinking the exact same thing.
You survive the rest of the drive with more ease, probably because of the food. You spend most of the remaining 2 hours leaning against the window, humming to the radio, closing your eyes but not really sleeping. You even forget to be nervous about what is to come.
That is, until the car pulls up to the venue.
It’s absolutely gorgeous, and a lot bigger than you imagined - a modern beach house overlooking the waters. It’s not as extravagant as one would expect to see when they come to a wedding, but considering the small crowd in attendance, this is more than enough. You see people rush in and out of the place even from far away - planners, caterers, the bridesmaids and groomsmen, probably.
You feel a bit comforted just watching this. His family seems to be doing a lot better than before. It’s nice to know.
You barely make it out of the car before someone calls your name, and pulls you into a hug that knocks the wind out of you. Although, when you catch the scent of her hair, you instantly know who it is.
Parents usually have a scent that’s distinct to only their kids, a scent so cozy and homely that no perfume can ever mask. You can only describe your mom’s scent with a feeling, specifically the feeling of your chest tightening, tingling with a bittersweetness that you never found elsewhere.
Strangely enough, Jungkook’s mother has always made you feel the opposite. She makes you feel relieved to be in her embrace, like she accepts you for who you are even if all you are to her, at the end of the day, is a stranger.
You hug her back awkwardly, hesitantly, in front of Jungkook’s dad, his brother Junghyun, and a girl you don’t know. You assume that she’s the bride-to-be, the main character whom this weekend revolves around. Sooji, you remember that was the name on the wedding invitation.
You get choked up suddenly, eyes turning glassy though you quickly blink it away. You’re not sure if you’ve had someone be so happy to see you. Bypassers might even think that you just found the cure for cancer.
For a second there, you wonder if your mere presence has ever made your mother this overjoyed.
You look at Jungkook for help, silently asking him to rescue you. Who else are you supposed to turn to if not him?
He understands that look. “Okay, mom,” he says, entangling her arms from you with ease, “Y/N’s tired from the drive. Let’s let her rest, yeah? I’ll show her the room.”
She ignores her son. “Honey,” she says, brushing your hair away from your face so she could see you better. “Thank you for coming.” She used to insist that you call her “mom”, or at least by her first name because “Mrs. Jeon” was too formal for someone she considered family.
You now have to opt for the latter, because “mom” isn’t an option for you anymore.
“Thank you for inviting me, Mrs. Jeon,” you tell her with a smile. You’re not really sure what else to say, but it makes you a little sad just calling her that.
She opens her mouth before closing it again, seemingly about to jokingly scold you for the formality before she recognizes the bittersweet look in your eyes. She just smiles at you then. There’s not much to be done about it.
You don’t know if anyone else sees how the moment is weighed down. Probably not. Maybe it’s just you and her who share this sentiment.
Jungkook doesn’t wait for his mom anymore. Sons, typical. He wedges himself between the two of you like a bulldozer and leads you inside the house.
Even though all you have is an overnight bag, Jungkook carries it for you all the way up to your room, which is only down the hall from his. Then he disappears pretty quickly afterward, saying something about his best man duties and putting out fires. He seems apologetic as he tells you this, but it’s not like you’re expecting him to babysit you all weekend.
You bore yourself to death in your room for a while, before you remember you have to text Yoongi to let him know you got here safely. Though, you stop short of telling him that it was Jungkook who drove you here. It’s trivial enough, right? You don’t want Yoongi to feel bad over nothing. You do, however, inform Taehyung and Jimin when you text them about it, to which Jimin only responds with a preemptively disapproving ‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.’
When you get too stir-crazy, you wander outside, hoping to explore the beach before it gets dark and colder. You try to stay out of everyone’s way, because a good guest is a quiet guest. You seem to be doing a good job. No one notices you, not even Jungkook’s mom but that’s because she’s the person you actively want to avoid the most. You don’t know what you’d even say to her if she gets you alone.
Everything is hectic, as one can probably imagine when it comes to wedding preparations. You haven’t had anyone close to you get married yet, so it’s safe to say that you’re pretty much clueless about all of this. You wonder what it’ll be like when your big day comes around, if you even ever get married. You haven’t thought about it in a long time. Why would you? You don’t really have a reason to think about this. It’s much easier to picture Taehyung’s or Jimin’s wedding day than your own.
Your opinion on having kids still remains the same, and you were never one of those girls who daydreamed about having a big and extravagant wedding, but it’s not such a bad idea to ponder about. You still think marriage is a scary thing - it’s one of the biggest commitments a person could ever make - but you’re not entirely opposed to getting married.
Why are you even mulling over this? Your time might never even come.
When you round the corner to get the steps that would lead you down to the beach, you run into Sooji and a woman holding a thick binder - must be a wedding planner. You give Jungkook’s future sister-in-law an awkward smile in greeting, which she returns much more gracefully before she tells the woman that she’ll be with her in a minute.
So now you’re stuck here, about to make small talk with a person you have never met before, and will likely never see again. Great.
“Hi,” you say, extending a hand. “I haven’t had the chance to introduce myself. I’m Y/N.”
“I’m Sooji,” she replies warmly as she shakes your hand, and you have to stop yourself from being a little weirdo and thinking about how silky her hair looks up close. “You’re Jungkook’s… friend, right?”
You purse your lips before nodding with a chuckle. The pause tells you that she knows, and you wouldn’t be surprised if she’s uncomfortable having you here.
“I’m sorry if this is weird. You probably don’t want a complete stranger at your wedding.”
Sooji shakes her head instantly, waving her hands around to dismiss your apology. “Please, it’s totally fine. Junghyun’s mom talked to me about it before we sent out the invites. I wouldn’t have agreed if I was really bothered. Don’t worry about it, seriously.”
“Why did you agree?” you ask, trying to sound as polite as possible. “You don’t know who I am.”
“I guess I was curious.” She shrugs, before laughing lightly as she says, “I used to think you weren’t real.”
“Huh?”
“She talks about you constantly. Never in front of Jungkook, of course. But she’s really fond of you, and you probably already know that doesn’t happen very often. She really does see you like a daughter. She made you sound too good to be true.”
You’re not sure how to respond to that. His mom still thinks about you, still talks about you after all this time. You’re just his ex-girlfriend, but she considers you her family. You don’t know what to do with this information nor the way it pinches your heart.
“I-” You purse your lips, fumbling with the responses in your head. You settle on a light laugh, because Sooji can probably tell that you’re struggling with the words too. “I have to be honest. I don’t know what to say to that.”
“You don’t have to say anything. I just thought you should know that you’re still very much loved here.” She gives you a kind smile, and it looks like she wants to tell you something else but decides against it in the end. Sooji’s eyes land somewhere behind you before she points in that general direction. “I have to go take care of an issue with the flowers, but look, Jungkook is here. Why don’t you ask him to show you around?”
And then she’s already off. Overall, what a… strange interaction.
You turn around to see Jungkook standing near one of the entrances to the house. As you watch him talk to someone - a bridesmaid, you assume, or just one of the other guests - you try not to think about the fact that there’s a stirring sensation in your stomach, and that it only intensifies when she throws her head back in a pretty laugh, a perfectly manicured hand landing on his arm like he’s the most charming person she’s ever met.
You don’t give it a name, don’t label it green in color even though you’re blue and he’s golden sunshine. You don’t acknowledge that it’s a feeling, because doing so would make it real and there are certain truths that you’d rather delude yourself into thinking are lies.
When Jungkook’s eyes catch yours and he cuts off the woman mid-sentence with a curt excuse me, you don’t acknowledge that feeling either, but it’s warm and it blooms in your chest as he makes his way to you. It’s something victorious, something that tickles your ribs.
He comes to you like you’re a destination he’s been waiting all his life to reach, and you certainly, adamantly don’t acknowledge the spectacularly dizzying feeling that swallows you whole when he places a gentle hand on your arm, his voice soft as he says, “There you are. I was looking for you.”
The familiarity, it’s catastrophic.
“I was just walking around,” you tell him. “There’s not a lot to do here. I was bored.”
“You have me,” he says. Probably not in that way, but you’d like to think that’s how he means it. “I don’t have any more fires to put out. What do you want to do now?”
You glance over your surroundings, still set on your original plans. You wanted to go alone, but you suppose you can let him accompany you. You check the time on your phone before asking, “Can we go down to the beach? I wanna see if we can catch the sunset.”
You used to do this whenever you came here to visit - walk along the beach, hand in hand, sunlight in your hair and the cool breeze holding you tight in the afterglow.
The keyword here is “used to”. Now, you have to stuff your hands in your pockets just so you don’t reach for him every time you shiver.
It’s late enough in the afternoon for you to see the moon faintly shine against a blue and orange backdrop. Sun and moon, together in the same frame. It feels symbolic somehow. You’re not really sure.
“The moon looks like an egg,” Jungkook observes astutely, taking casual strides next to you. It makes you burst into easy laughter, which makes him laugh with you too. You stop walking when you reach what you think is a good spot to watch the sky.
“Let’s sit here for a bit,” you say. It’s not the greatest idea - sitting idly by would only make you colder - but you just want to stop and look at the sunset. Once you’re seated in the sand, you respond to his moon remark, “That’s true, y’know. NASA said so.”
“Yeah,” he says, settling down beside you, “you made me read that.”
You’d forgotten about it, and you didn’t think that he’d remember. It’s freezing cold and the moon looks like an egg, but you’re not thinking, and you feel safe. Nothing can hurt you here, or at least that’s what you’d like to tell yourself.
You wrap your arms around yourself to keep from shivering, but you still shiver anyways.
“Are you cold?” he asks.
“A little,” you admit. “I should’ve worn a thicker sweater. But it’s o-”
He doesn’t let you finish the sentence, just smoothly takes off his jacket to put it around your shoulders.
You put your hands atop his to stop him. When you touch him, there’s an electric tingle that almost makes you flinch. He feels warm, still resembling a human furnace.
“No, you don’t have t-”
“Take the jacket, Y/N,” he says. “It’s just a jacket.”
The jacket smells like him. It only makes you want to crawl further into the warmth.
He seems more self-assured here, that’s what you notice. More like the version of himself that he used to be. Confident, sometimes borderline cocky. Annoying but oddly endearing, you came to love that about him.
His relaxed demeanor is understandable. You’re merely a visitor here, while this is his homeground.
“I’m curious about something,” he says after a while.
“Okay.”
“What’s the deal with Wednesdays?” he asks.
“You know how they say bad things come in threes?” You purse your lips, thinking it over, feeling something bitter in your mouth as you recall the events that led to this. “My parents got divorced on a Wednesday. I moved out of mom’s house on a Wednesday. And…” You hold your knees close to your chest as you hesitate to utter this last part, “we broke up on a Wednesday.”
You see the exact moment Jungkook mentally slaps himself, paling a couple shades as he tongues his cheek, not expecting his question to inadvertently lead back to this. It wasn’t your intention to guilt trip him. It was true that he dumped you on a Wednesday, but you don’t want the mood to turn sour, to have to mull over this again. Like he said, it will still be there for you to worry about when you get back. You’re not looking forward to returning to a shitshow, but what you’d hate even more is to tarnish the memories of this place just because you can’t keep from being vindictive for not even a weekend.
“I was born on a Wednesday too, so I guess bad things come in fours sometimes,” you continue, chuckling to yourself humorlessly.
A frown appears on his face almost instantaneously. “What is that supposed to mean?”
You shrug. Jungkook turns his body toward you, which makes you spare him a glance before you return your gaze to the horizon. His face is so serious that it’s almost funny. “Y/N,” he presses. “Why would you say that?”
“C’mon, it’s a joke. I was just being self-deprecating. Lighten up.”
“Why are you talking like that?”
“Like what? Contrary to popular belief, I don’t walk around with a thundercloud over my head all the time,” you laugh lightly. “I figured if there was a day to be nice to you, it should be today. And tomorrow, I guess.”
“This is you being nice?”
Funny how just a few weeks ago, you were fighting with him and calling him a hypocrite. Now, you’re sitting together, watching the sun set, trying not to be mean to him.
“I’m not picking a fight with you,” you say. “This is nice enough.”
“It’s not even my wedding.”
“Okay.” You glance at him again, letting words flow without a single thought. “I’ll be even nicer to you on your wedding day then.”
You don’t know where that even came from, but something aches the very second the words leave your mouth. The thought of him getting married one day makes you just nauseous, even though you always knew that it was a possibility. It might even be inevitable.
You clear your throat, waving the sullen feeling away. Your body shivers then, even after the added warmth of his jacket. Maybe you’re not shivering because of the cold anymore.
He doesn’t say anything, but you can feel his eyes linger on the side of your face. The both of you keep tiptoeing around an elephant that follows you wherever you go.
You hug your knees close to your chest, watching the blue sky melt into the golden horizon, splattered with ribbons of cotton candy clouds.
You want to scooch closer to him and have him wrap his arm around your shoulders. This isn’t the spot where you used to draw your names in the sand, enveloped in a giant heart like two lovesick kids, but wouldn’t it be nice to imagine that it is?
“I was always really happy here,” you mumble to yourself.
You were, truly. This city was your pocket of hope, your piece of peace.
Being here brings back so many memories.
It’s the same feeling you get every time you pass by somewhere you used to live. The nostalgia of walking down the same road you used to walk every day until your shoes wore out. The familiarity of your surroundings. The bittersweetness of looking into a past you cannot hold anymore, of remembering the person you were at a certain period in your life, of knowing the things you do now that you didn’t back then.
You long for things you cannot change.
Nostalgia only grows stronger with time, you can always count on that.
He hums in agreement, before admitting quietly, “I miss you.” One pulls, the other pushes. The water wavers, like it’s touched by his words, simple but earnest. You’re touched too, somewhere in your heart, where you know you should be writing someone else’s name now.
Should?
“You’re pushing it,” you say softly.
“I know.”
You look at him. Maybe it’s because you’re back in the city that holds only good memories of you two. Maybe you’re hypnotized by the way the pink and purple hues kiss his side profile, making him feel like a fever dream and not someone you loved. Maybe it’s the cold, making you yearn for any source of warmth. But instead of returning his sentiment, you say, “It’ll pass.”
He meets your eyes. There’s something pleading in his gaze. All things pass eventually. Time moves forward, people move on. Bad things will pass sooner or later. Your worst heartbreak, your most arduous trials, your saddest moments, they will all pass.
And good things… good things will have to pass too, whether you like it or not.
Your fingers twitch from where they’re still holding onto your body. You itch to reach for his hand. You don’t tell him what he wants to hear, even though here’s a part of you that wants to say it back. In a better world, you would be telling him I love you too, instead of having to suppress an I miss you too.
“All things have to pass eventually. This will too.”
[20:05] Taebear 🐻: we could go to that bar near the gallery. Y/N likes the cocktails there [20:06] Mimi 🐥: kay kay [20:06] Mimi 🐥: soooooo next friday? [20:09] Mimi 🐥: why is y/n reading our messages. shouldn’t she be at dinner [20:09] You: i approve of the bar choice [20:11] You: if you didn’t want me reading your messages, you shouldn’t have sent them to the gc [20:11] You: and if you must know, i’m skipping dinner. i’m avoiding Jungkook’s mom [20:12] Mimi 🐥: understandable. i figured you would do that [20:13] Mimi 🐥: how’s it going? are we regretting going yet? i told you to just stay home and we could binge watch the office together [20:15] You: and EYE told you that you could be a good friend and go to this wedding with me but nooooo baby doesn’t like the cold [20:16] You: you could’ve visited your parents while you’re here you know. two birds with one stone [20:18] Mimi 🐥: babes my parents stayed with me for a whole month last month. i reached my quota for family face time [20:19] You: son and friend of the year 👏 [20:20] Mimi 🐥: 😎😎😎😘
[20:22] Taebear 🐻: hey [20:23] You: uh oh. am i in trouble? why is this not in the gc? [20:25] Taebear 🐻: lol shut up [20:26] Taebear 🐻: you okay? [20:28] You: feels like that could’ve been a perfectly good question to ask in the gc [20:29] Taebear 🐻: because it’s a serious question and we both know Jimin can’t be serious for one minute to save his life [20:32] You: why does it have to be a serious question? 🤪 [20:32] Taebear 🐻: 😕 [20:33] You: stop pouting. i’m fine [20:35] Taebear 🐻: are you? [20:36] You: i am! you don’t have to go all mama bear on me [20:39] Taebear 🐻: ha ha ha. you’re so funny [20:40] Taebear 🐻: want me to call you? [20:42] You: i said i’m fiiiiiine 🙄 [20:43] You: but also no because i told everyone i was tired and i’m pretending to be asleep in my room right now [20:43] Taebear 🐻: okay [20:43] Taebear 🐻: did you eat something at least? [20:44] You: i have a cup ramen in my room [20:45] Taebear 🐻: okay [20:46] Taebear 🐻: how was today? did JK make you wanna strangle him? [20:48] You: okay Kim Taehyung at least act like you have some faith in your friend lol [20:50] You: but mmmmmm it was ok. he was mostly behaving himself [20:51] Taebear 🐻: mostly? [20:54] You: we were down at the beach and he just told me he missed me out of the blue [20:55] You: Mimi is asking why no one is replying to him [20:57] Taebear 🐻: i can see that [20:58] Taebear 🐻: what did you tell JK? [21:01] You: i quoted fleabag to him [21:09] Taebear 🐻: i had to google that [21:10] Taebear 🐻: i still don’t know what that means [21:11] You: i know you don’t lol. you’re adorable [21:11] You: i’ll tell you when i get back. [21:13] You: ok bye i have to sleep early or i’ll look like ass in the morning [21:14] Taebear 🐻: oh. okay [21:15] Taebear 🐻: sleep tight. remember not to gorge yourself on booze tomorrow [21:17] You: thanks for the reminder. love you mom 🙄💕 [21:17] Taebear 🐻: :) [21:20] Taebear 🐻: you won’t look like ass btw
You clocked out right after you told Taehyung that you would. It wasn’t a peaceful sleep though. The anxiety simmering in your belly woke you up a few times throughout the night. You don’t even know why you were anxious. It’s not like you were the one who was about to walk down the aisle.
When morning finally came and you managed to untangle yourself from the surprising comfort of your familiar bed, you practically dragged your feet for the subsequent two hours, trying to get ready. As if that would actually slow down the passage of time.
You had to compartmentalize the things you needed to do in a mental checklist. Makeup. Hair. Dress. Stare at yourself in the mirror for half an hour and internally freak out while waiting for Jungkook to come get you from your room.
Now you’re sitting in the wedding hall, watching people filter into the room. It’s not even a lot of people, but you’re still overwhelmed regardless.
You feel so exposed, even though he’s the only one looking at you in this room of strangers. He’s been looking at you like that ever since he first saw you this morning, in a dress that you got just days before the wedding. You still don’t know if it’s entirely appropriate for your ex-boyfriend’s brother’s wedding - maybe a bit revealing - but it was the only one you could find on such short notice.
When you tried on the dress for Taehyung and Jimin a few days ago, Taehyung said you looked beautiful. Jimin said you looked decent, “six point five out of ten,” which translated to “pretty nice” in Jimin-lingo. That would’ve been enough if you were going to any other wedding, not one where Jungkook would also be attending.
You had wanted him to see you and regret ever leaving you.
It was a silly thought, just a tad adolescent.
You had wanted him to see you in your dress and be consumed with thoughts of you until he couldn’t even see straight. To be the only thing on his mind, you didn’t think it was a lot to ask for.
That was before he told you not to think about it and you’d been convinced to just go with the flow just for two days. It was before he actually did see you earlier today in your dress - a simple midnight blue satin cowl neck with a slit in the thigh - but you were the one rendered helpless and speechless. He had stared at you for a minute when he came to walk you down from your room, then he’d said, all breathless even though both of you were just standing there, “You’re beautiful.”
You’re beautiful, not You look beautiful.
You don’t know why, but you appreciated it.
It made your cheeks burn underneath your artificial rosy blush. Stupid, you thought to yourself when you two made your way to the main hall. Stupid for letting yourself get dizzy because of a single compliment from him.
You’re seated with his parents, which makes sense because you don’t know anybody here except for them. Well, maybe you know one of his cousins whose kid you and Jungkook used to babysit whenever their family was in the city, but you doubt that he even remembers you anymore.
When the ceremony begins, your heart instantly feels like it’s about to drop to the pit of your stomach.
You can’t lie to yourself. It stings.
It stings just sitting here next to his parents like a daughter-in-law, like a member of their family, watching his brother solidify his happy ending.
It stings that Jungkook is standing up there, looking as handsome as ever, but his eyes aren’t on the couple. They keep flickering to you no matter how much you try to pretend that they don’t.
It stings that even though you don’t think about marriage often - or maybe you just don’t allow yourself to - you can’t deny that the thought does cross your mind from time to time. Any time that you’d wander the corridors inside your head, you’d pass the doors that you keep unopened on purpose but there’s always that one door marked with a bright red X that you can never sidestep.
You watch Junghyun and Sooji with their teary smiles and shaky hands, shaky but happy. There’s a sudden clarity that this could’ve been you and him in another life. Forever is a lie, but you would’ve perjured yourself a thousand times for him. I do - you would’ve meant it.
You imagine yourself in Sooji’s place, and Jungkook, standing right on the other side, holding both your hands in his. A beautiful and radiant bride terrified of the altar. A dashing groom with a smile that could rival the sun and shoulders weighing heavier than he lets on.
It would’ve looked clumsy, but it could’ve been right.
You wonder if he’s wondering the same thing. Maybe he is. You hope he is.
When the ceremony ends with a kiss shared between the newlyweds, you wipe away the tears that well up in your eyes. The people around you do the same thing, but they’re doing it for the right reason, out of genuine joy for the happy couple. You don’t think you can say the same for yourself.
Some of the bridesmaids fawn over him. It’s reasonable, you suppose. One tends to do that in the presence of Jeon Jungkook.
You watch as they come up to him one by one to ask him to dance, watch as he politely declines until they’re all stalking away with similar pouts on their faces. You watch him until his eyes lock on you, sitting at a table near the back, nursing a glass of champagne.
He weaves himself with ease through the people making their way to the dance floor. When he’s in front of you, he holds out a hand.
“Dance with me?” he asks, his doe eyes working overtime to lure you in with their sparkles, though you’d rather stay here where you can easily go unnoticed until the night ends. “One song?”
“I don’t know how,” you say, even as you’re taking his hand and standing up.
“I showed you how, remember?”
“That was a long time ago.”
He squeezes you reassuringly. “Just follow my lead,” he says, walking the both of you to the floor. “C’mon.”
Once the music starts, your heels stomp on his feet at least three times before you start finding the beat to move along to. Muscle memory, or whatever, is bullshit. You remember absolutely nothing of what he showed you.
You’re grateful that the song is slow, because it makes it easier for you to follow the beat with your two left feet. He takes one of your hands in his, the other settling on the small of your back, guiding you to move in a steady rhythm.
You feel his mother’s eyes on the two of you, because she must be somewhere nearby, watching you like a hawk. You feel his gaze on your face while you keep yours on the knot of his tie, just trying to keep your composure and to not step on his feet with your heels.
The blur of white that you catch from the periphery of your vision makes you turn your head. Sooji and Junghyun are close by, swaying together slowly to the soft music, both of them glowing with happiness. She must sense your eyes on her, because she lifts her gaze up to meet yours. She smiles at the sight of you and Jungkook, and you smile back, because you don’t know how else to respond to that.
You don’t say it, but you do think it. Your fingers tighten around his hand ever so slightly.
Could that have been us?
If the answer is yes, then it would hurt.
If the answer is no, then it would hurt.
The point of your story is that it’s painful however you choose to look at it. There’s no other way to frame it. It’s just painful, because you’re never going to get any of it back.
You bite your lip, then turn away from the happy couple but you still don’t look at Jungkook. You look at your hand in his, and that’s when you see it.
“How’d you get that?” you ask, gently tracing the inch of slightly raised skin on his knuckles. You never noticed the scar until now.
“It was four years ago, I think? After Taehyung and I almost got into a fight, I went outside and… punched a wall,” he says, wincing as he recalls the memory.
His answer takes you aback. “You and Taehyung got into a fight?”
“Almost,” he corrects. “It was a long time ago. Didn’t they tell you?”
“No, they didn’t say anything. What happened?”
“Nothing happened.”
“If it was really nothing, you wouldn’t have punched a wall.” You frown. It makes you miss a few beats, but the song isn’t what’s important now, even if Jungkook is still trying to steer you back into the dance. “Taehyung isn’t violent. You aren’t violent.”
“I’m serious,” he says finally. “It’s nothing. We were just drunk and stupid.”
You know there must be more to it, that something must have happened or been said to trigger such a reaction from both of them. But you also know that you won’t probably get anything out of Jungkook if he doesn’t want to tell you.
You give up, for now. “Fine. If you say so.” You’ll just have to weasel it out of Jimin later.
The song comes to an end, before another one comes on. If Jungkook remembers that he only asked for one song, maybe he’s counting his blessings that you’re still here and dancing with him, because he doesn’t mention it.
For some reason, you pull your hand away from his, only to slide up his shoulder to lock both of your hands behind his neck. He seems surprised, but he does the same around your waist.
Jungkook’s gaze flickers to your lips briefly, then back to your eyes again. You find yourself doing the same and wonder what he tastes like after all the time you’ve been apart. Is he still as sweet as you remember? You used to tease that it was because of the excessive sugar he put in everything, but you knew it was really just him. The few inches between you are so inviting that it’s practically tempting you to close the gap. You could, easily in fact. Blame it on one too many glasses of champagne later if you want.
He looks younger like this, like the boy you loved, starry eyes and dimpled smile. His shoulders are always the most comfortable resting place, the crook of his neck your long lost home. This is nice, you think, to see him again even though it feels like a fever dream. Memories of your first date, your first kiss, come to life before your eyes so realistically that you could almost touch them.
Loved? That sounds funny to you.
The people you used to be, souls wrapped in innocence, when the world was nothing but the arms of the person you loved. You reach out, and the memories quickly fade from view. The only trace they leave behind is a speck of gold on your fingertips, a memento of charming naiveté for you to tuck neatly away in the corner of your mind, but also a reminder that ah, they only exist in the locket of your heart now. Because he has changed, and you think you must have too. Life, as they say, goes on.
“We made it. Kind of. That’s crazy,” you find yourself saying.
“Did we?”
“You don’t think so?” you chuckle. “We’re in a group chat with the Kim Seokjin who spams it with bad jokes on a daily basis. I’d call that a win.”
That makes him laugh. “If you put it like that, yeah, maybe. Sure.”
Other people might be fooled, but it doesn’t sound at all convincing to you. The light doesn’t really reach his eyes. You bite the inside of your cheek, thinking of how to translate the sudden poignant turn of the moment.
“It isn’t everything you hoped it’d be?” you ask.
His shoulders rise then fall quickly in a second-long shrug. “I thought it would make me feel more… fulfilled. But it doesn’t. Not really.”
The way he says it and the way he’s looking at you makes your heart dive. You understand what he means. You’re good at what you do, and you don’t need reassurance from anyone to recognize that. But sometimes, it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. Doesn’t feel like it’s real, like it’s validated.
When you landed your first big project, even before Yoongi, you were so proud of yourself. You were bursting with excitement but you weren’t happy, and you knew what the reason was. Something was missing that couldn’t be filled, not even with all your friends’ hundreds of messages of encouragement.
It’s beyond stupid, this feeling like your wins amount to nothing at all just because of one person. You wanted him there to celebrate every achievement with you and he wasn’t, and the milestones seemed incomplete without the presence of him. It doesn’t feel like you’ve accomplished anything because this always used to be a dream you thought you’d make come true together.
“It’s lonely,” he concludes.
It sounds like he feels the same way, like he wanted you to be there too.
He suddenly holds you tighter than you think he needs to, like he’s afraid to let go of you. You imagine that he doesn’t want to let go of you, and it makes you feel better for a second. But it doesn’t change the fact that he still did in the end. And he will have to when this ends.
What was the point of this? Why did he bring this upon yourselves when he seems to be as hurt as you are? All of this time, all of these years, lost to what? You could’ve been happy together but instead, you were both lost and miserable.
When the music stops - you lost count of how many songs it’s been - you pull away from him. He looks disappointed, maybe even a little hurt for some reason.
“I’m gonna get some air,” you say, already turning away from him.
“Y/N-”
“I need some air.” Then you’re weaving through the dancing couples despite Jungkook calling your name. How did he manage it? How did he not look back when you called out for him?
You hastily grab your coat on the way out. It’s not going to keep you warm, but that’s not something you’re even remotely concerned with.
It’s everywhere, you feel it down to your bones.
The wind wraps itself tightly around you, intertwining in your hair, slipping through the cracks of your fingers, caressing your face in a chilling touch. You greet the cold like a long lost sister, shivering violently with nostalgia. It was there for you more than your own flesh and blood.
Is that why you like the sea at night? Because it reminds you of mom?
It’s dark out here, barely anything is visible except for a lighthouse sending out light in the quiet of the night. You can’t see much, but you can certainly hear it. You’re not sure if the music is coming from inside the venue, or if it’s still ringing in your ears. It’s probably the latter; you’re too far away to be able to catch the music anyway. But regardless, the tune is quickly drowned out by the sea.
The waves crash violently against the shore like it’s out for blood. There’s a magnetic pull, as if it’s calling out for you. You want to go to it, to reach out and feel the cold outside of your body for once, but you stay there despite your legs itching to stand up and run straight ahead. Into the water and down under.
You could lie down and close your eyes for a moment. The sound of the water, as sharp and brutal as it is, nurtures a part of you somehow.
You just want to be alone. You don’t want to talk to Taehyung, or Jimin, or even Yoongi.
Oh.
Yoongi.
It’s a terrible feeling, knowing that you’re going to hurt Yoongi. Knowing that you’re going to kill this even before it has a chance to truly begin.
Truth be told, you can’t envision a future with Yoongi. There isn’t anything wrong with him, because he’s not the problem here. Yoongi is fun, he’s considerate, he keeps things light on purpose for you, until you’re ready to initiate something more serious. He’s good for you, even Taehyung thinks so.
But you can’t love Yoongi, not in the way that he wants you to. Not more than you love Jungkook.
There you go. Ruining things again.
Did you ruin Jungkook? Is that what happened?
The layers on you are no match for the sea at night. The wind hisses relentlessly, biting at any part of your skin that’s exposed.
It takes you back to that night. Almost everything does, actually.
Maybe that’s why you never even stopped to consider starting anything with anyone, because it always ends. If there’s a beginning, then there will be an inevitable ending. Love isn’t made to last and you aren’t meant to carry love with you. You’ve been abandoned twice. If it happens a third time, it’s a pattern, and then your hypothesis will only be proven. That the problem here is you.
You’d be lying if you said you haven’t wondered when it’ll finally be Taehyung’s turn to leave. He eventually will, right? That one’s gonna hurt.
Then, you’re startled when someone calls your name.
“What’s wrong?” Jungkook asks. The wind and the waves masked the sound of his footsteps walking up to you. When you turn around to face him, his eyes grow worried, almost panicked. “Why are you crying?”
You breathe out irritatedly before you hastily wipe at your cheeks. You didn’t even realize that you’d been crying. “Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine,” you say, though you both know it’s a lie. “I’m just tired. I’m going up to my room.”
He catches your wrist in a firm grip when you try to walk away. You wish he’d just leave you alone, but you knew he wouldn’t drop it just like that.
“I said I’m fine,” you insist.
“You were crying,” he says. “Did I do something wrong?”
He didn’t, at least not tonight.
God, you really don’t want to do this right now.
“Jungkook,” you warn. “Let go of me.”
You try to free yourself from his grip, hoping that he’ll get the hint and back off for now. Instead, he pulls you into his chest, where you struggle to escape from his hold until you realize your efforts are futile. He takes the wind’s place, wound tightly around you, so tightly that it’s nearly impossible for you to move.
You hiss out his name, but he doesn’t budge.
“Jungkook, can you just- Fuck!”
Damn him.
You realize he’s not giving up, which in turn makes you give up struggling, hoping that if you let this be a moment, then it’ll be something that can pass.
You’re just standing there, letting him hold you, letting yourself be held by the person who broke you in the first place. This feels exactly like where you’re supposed to be - in his arms, with your face hidden in the crook of his neck, his gentle fingers stroking your hair. There’s not a lot that you could do but lean into that feeling the same way you lean into him. One foot in the sand, one foot in the past. A hand on the doorknob of time, wondering if you should look back or look forward.
You want to be alone, but that never used to apply with him.
The wind stills, the sea calms. You remain unmoving too, locked in his embrace. You feel the faint rhythm of his heart, beating faster than you think it should. If you could, you would bottle this moment up and live there forever.
I miss you, you think.
I miss you.
I miss you.
I miss you.
Then your arms are around him too. It only makes him hold you tighter, and all you can think about is how much you miss him, how painful it is to miss him, how you feel like you’re being pulled apart at the seams from the weight of missing him.
Fuck.
Can you pretend that the last few years never happened? Is there a higher power that would allow you to go back to the night before that wretched Wednesday, when everything was still perfect? Hundreds of days of your life, can you pretend that it was just one long nightmare? When you wake up, you’ll be back in his humble apartment, tangled up together in his bed. Warm sunlight, your silken youth, and him. It was all you ever needed.
Again with the devastating familiarity. The city, the beach. His mother’s warmth that always made you reminisce about your own mother’s coldness. How Jungkook used to find you in moments like this and just stayed by your side until the dejection passed. He understood that he could never understand it the way you did.
You hear yourself sniffle, then you feel him press a kiss into your hair. Home is comforting.
Oh, you never want to leave.
You don’t want to leave, and that’s terrifying.
You allow yourself to stay there for one more second - one endless second - so you could commit to memory what it’s like to be with him. Back and forth. It’s always so easy to fall into him.
Jungkook releases you when he feels you loosen after a while, and you reluctantly meet his eyes as he tilts your head to face him. His fingers cradling your jaw, how warm and delicate they feel on your skin.
You swallow thickly, your mind going blank. He’s the only person you see, the only one that matters. His eyes flicker south, and even then you don’t make any move to run away, despite his loose grip on your waist telling you that you can if you want to.
You told him that it would pass, and maybe for him, it will. For him, it’s the city and the moment, making him feel like he’s caught up in a page that he’s turned over a long time ago. He was fine with leaving, and he’s been fine without you. It will pass for him, as much as it hurts you to admit it.
But not for you. For you, there’s only him. There’s nobody else but him. It’s always been him, no matter how hard you try to tell yourself that there will be another person you can love as much as you love Jungkook. You might only be a page, perhaps even a chapter, in the story of his life, but he’s your entire book. He’s volume after volume after volume, until he takes up the whole shelf and leaves no room for anything else, not even for yourself.
And now here he is - at the biggest turn in your career.
He’s a bad blood cell you can’t ever get rid of.
You’ll never be able to truly let go of him. How could you? When you truly love someone, those feelings will carry on forever. They’ll always have a piece of your heart despite an ending. When you look back on a certain period in your life, you’ll think to yourself, You’ll always be a part of me. I loved you then.
But Jungkook is a force of nature. He has your whole heart.
Years and years from now, when you look back on your life, you know you’ll see him everywhere. Even when you’re old and gray, and when faces all just blur together in a mosaic of broken memories and long lost youth, you know you’ll still remember him - the person you loved, the one whom you let slip through your fingers. The great love of your life when you were young.
Sometimes, you regret that day. You can’t help feeling like it was your fault too. Maybe you should’ve tried harder to keep him. You should’ve fought harder, should’ve held onto him instead of standing there and watching him leave.
He lit the match, and you let the house burn. It takes two to tango, two to break a heart.
You’re quick to let people leave. Oh, how you wish it could be that easy to let them go too.
It isn’t until your eyes mimic the flicker of his gaze that he leans in. You meet him halfway. For the first time in years, you feel like you could breathe, truly breathe. It’s achingly slow, like neither of you can believe that this is happening.
You sigh against his mouth when his tongue brushes your bottom lip, slips past the seal to devour you. It feels like a perfect dream. You could stay in this bubble with him forever, pretend that you’re the only two people who exist in the world and there’s nothing else, no one else, waiting for you in a city that seems so far away right now. The thought of him never left you, not even for a second. He’s always been with you everywhere you go, no matter what you do, always in the back of your mind.
He tastes like your youth, like remembrance. He kisses you like he’s still yours when deep down you know that you’re still his. The hand on your jaw is gentle but firm, and it makes you repeat a thought, I miss you.
Then a feeling, I love you.
Not then. Now.
I love you now.
I love you even when I shouldn’t. Even when it hurts. Even when you leave me. Even when you don’t love me more than I love you. If there comes a day where you love somebody else, I will still love you then. There will never be another person for me but you. My first and only love.
When he pulls away, you think it’s too quick, even though your lungs are grateful for the breath that you instantly inhale. You stare at his lips like you’re in a daze, mesmerized, wanting to chase them again. You don’t even know how you have it in yourself to utter these next words, but you hear your own voice saying them anyway.
You’re holding onto him now. Doesn’t that count?
“Let’s…” Your fingers tighten on the collar of his dress shirt. “Let’s go up to your room.”
note (2): so... what do we think?? will they?? won't they?? 😵 stay tuned for obs7.5 which will be dropping 29.09.2023! also i'm gonna pause obs muse asks for a little bit! 😬
all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted september 24, 2023]
#jungkook x reader#jungkook fluff#jungkook smut#jungkook angst#jungkook x you#jungkook fanfic#jungkook imagines#bts x reader#bts x you#bts fluff#bts smut#bts angst#bts scenarios#bts imagines#bangtanbathhouse#clubzerooclock#52hertz#fic: our beloved summer#obs spoilers#jungkook
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Now hear me out here… Miles Earth 42 x F!Reader dancing Bachata🤭 Orrr something like they are at a party and a family friend decides to dance a rather romantic song with us so Miles gets jealous. So many different scenarios with Bachata and dancing I wouldn’t mind fluff either where like they dance in the living room or smth I just love Bachata and romantic dancing ♥️😊
-J
Eres Mía ⭒ Miles Morales
Synopsis › Miles gets jealous and a nearly gets into a fight, so he makes it up to you by teaching you bachata.
Pairing › Earth-42! Miles Morales x Fem!Reader
Inspo › Request.
Includes › ATSV SPOILERS, tooth rotting fluff, swearing, bad Spanish, jealousy, pet names, a tiny bit suggestive
P.S. › Thank you for this ask! I had so much fun. A nice change from the angst. <33
P.S.S. › I am now making a taglist!!! Lemme know if you wanna be on it. I also think I want to find mutuals and get more involved in the community…
When Miles asked Y/n to be his plus one, she almost couldn’t believe it. His delivery was cool and casual as if he didn’t invite her to a party with all of his family and closest family friends in attendance. They had become official a little over a month ago (though Miles swears it’s been longer), so the first family gathering was a big deal, a huge milestone most couples put off until much later. When she tried to explain to her boyfriend the significance of this event, he didn’t understand. “Don’t start stressin’. It’s jus’ my abuela’s birthday party,�� she remembered him saying.
Abuela?
Abuela!
If his grandmother was anything like Rio Morales, Y/n would be walking into a lion’s den. Miles did nothing to placate her worries, making her do the exact thing he told her not to do: worry.
The weekend had arrived and so did the much anticipated birthday party. Y/n spent a considerable amount of time getting ready, choosing a tie front top with a cami underneath and satin skirt to combat the sweltering city heat. She double checked every angle in the mirror before leaving her apartment.
The corners of the gift envelope addressed in her elegant script were slightly bent from being clutched in her nervous hands all the way to Harlem. It was easy to find the building. Y/n simply followed the booming sound of music and laughter to the rooftop. The party was already in full swing. Half of New York showed up to celebrate Gloria Morales’ 70th birthday.
Y/n moved through the packed party-goers to the gift table, not seeing a single familiar face amongst them. She felt out of place. Does she introduce herself? Wait? Look for Miles? Certainly he wouldn’t leave her to brave his family alone. A tinge of panic settled in her stomach as she looked again.
“You lost, babygirl?” Y/n nearly jumped out of her skin hearing a strange voice beside her. The boy was taller than her and around her age or a little older. His feather duster of a mustache curved with his smirk as his leering eyes roved her head to toe slowly. Painfully slow.
She prickled, immediately raising her guard. “No, I’m just waiting for someone.” He glanced around, seeing everyone engrossed in their own conversations.
“I ain’ never seen you round here before. What’s your name?” Y/n hesitated to answer, but gave him a curt reply. “Thas cute. Real cute.” This was a party after all, the point was to mingle. And she didn’t want to seem rude. She had no idea who this guy was. He might’ve been a cousin, a family friend, someone who could easily say the wrong thing to the right person about her. “You know how to dance?” The night was starting to look very long.
Where was Miles?
⋆
Miles was very late. On his way, but late. His mother has surely noticed his absence by now. Abuela was definitely asking about him. And Y/n…she was probably already there. He cursed himself underneath his mask. That last job was pushing it. There was no time to go home, change, and take the subway like he originally planned. Luckily, he knew a shortcut through the skyscrapers and shadows of New York.
The window of his abuela’s apartment squeaked as it slid open. Miles rushed to shed his Prowler persona in the guest bedroom and stuff the suit in his bag. In a second, he appeared to be a normal teenage boy despite the forming bruises. He prepared himself to face the wrath of his mother, grandmother, and girlfriend. What he was not prepared for was seeing Y/n about to be pulled to the dance floor by another guy. They were close. Too close for his liking.
Something burned inside Miles, one he was reluctant to identify—jealousy. Dare he say doubt? He was new to the boyfriend thing. Sometimes he said the wrong thing, silent at the wrong times. But he tried. Was Y/n already fed up? There was no denying she was gorgeous. She could pull any guy she wanted.
He stalked closer, effortlessly weaving through the crowd. “Oh, come on! I’m not asking you to marry me. Just one song.” The guy tugged at her again. Miles recognized him. Eric and his family were friends, though Miles only endured his presence when they were forced to be in the same place. They’d never gotten along, finding each other to be a nuisance and a relationship beyond neutrality unnecessary. But that little understanding might just end right here, this was not about to fly on his watch.
“I told you I don’t want to dance,” Y/n separated herself out of his grip. The sheer expression of disgust on her amused Miles. She found him as annoying as he did.
Eric made the mistake of reaching towards her again. He had the chance to back off and it sounded like he had been warned more than once. This was not about to fly. Miles decided it was time to interfere. He swiftly placed himself at Y/n’s side, his footsteps soundless, a skill learned from his…side hobby. “La escuchaste, cabrón. Retrocede.” Venom laced his tone, an unspoken threat at the tip of his tongue. The air turned to ice around the three of them. You heard her, cabrón. Back off.
The confidence drained from Eric’s face. He knew good and well Miles was not to be messed with. There were rumors about him and his penchant for beating anyone who pissed him off into the ground. “Ella es tu chica, Morales?” He stepped up to him in a vain attempt to mask how intimidated he really was. Miles moved Y/n behind him. She watched the standoff silently, keeping a hand on Miles’ bicep in case it went south. She’s your girl, Morales?
Miles tilted his head, sneering down at the posturing fool. “Sí, ella es mía. Ahora déjala.” Yeah, she’s mine. Now leave her alone.
“No estaba tratando de hacer nada,” Eric scoffed. He turned his attention back to the pretty girl hidden behind Miles. “If you get tired of this asshole, come find me.” I wasn’t trying to do nothing.
Miles lunged, thankfully, with some supernatural girlfriend sense, Y/n was quicker and held him back. Eric flinched, his fear visible for that split second. Heads turned. “You need to calm down, Miles.” Her hand made its way into his, gently pulling him away. He backed away, never breaking his cold glare from Eric.
⋆
Together they left the party. Miles muttered curses in Spanish Y/n couldn’t catch as he stomped down the stairs. “Miles! Miles, baby, slow down!” She called his name again. “You not ‘bout to make me run after you in these shoes!” He stopped. His jaw was tight, eyebrows set low on his face, hands burrowed in his pockets to hide his balled up fists. Damn. Even seething he was gorgeous. “We talked about this. You gotta talk to me.”
He was silent for a few moments, he merely stared down at Y/n as she wrapped her arms around his middle. His heart pounded in his chest. (It was because of her. Miles refused to admit those lustrous eyes and her touch still had such an effect on him) “Ian like seein’ you wit him. Shit pissed me off. For a minute I thought…” She fixed his collar, avoiding his gaze to keep herself from smiling. “Nothin’.” Miles was jealous and willing to protect her by any means necessary.
Y/n heard the words left unspoken. Miles was a fortress locked up tight to keep the outside world out. But behind his many walls he was a boy with feelings and insecurities. “Miles, I’d never do that. I like you too much.”
“Yeah, I know, ma. Sorry for gettin’ all upset.”
“‘S fine. That’s not what I’m mad about.” She eyed the fresh bruises coloring his cheek and temple. “Where were you?” At this point, she was more concerned than angry. Miles wasn’t inclined to long conversations, but he was decent enough to send her a text. Although dry and vague it was something. Y/n would take what she could get.
Miles stiffened in her embrace. “I had to take care of some stuff. Don’t worry ‘bout it. Lemme make it up to you.”
“You owe me a dance.” Prying it out of him would get her nowhere. She decided to let it go. Just this once.
“A dance?” he asked. She grinned, happy to catch him off guard for once.
Y/n nodded. “Mrs. Morales told me you’re a wonderful dancer. Don’t be holdin’ out on me.”
His sigh was long and deep, directed towards the ceiling of the narrow hallway. Miles was in no place to refuse. He took her hand and started walking. “Alright, but we not goin’ to the roof.”
He led her to his grandma’s apartment. It was sizable and definitely decorated by an elderly woman. Y/n admired the photos sitting on the mantle. There was Rio and Jefferson Davis, dressed in white for their wedding day. She paused on a picture of an infant covered in paint, smiling from ear to ear with two teeth. She awed at Miles. He was so cute, so carefree without the shadows of the world dragging behind him.
“Ven aquí, mami.” He stood in the middle of the living room, hands outstretched, a song playing behind him from his phone. She peeked at the song as they joined hands. Come here, mami.
“Eres Mía” by Romeo Santos.
The song was unfamiliar to her. “What? You thought you was gonna to twerk and grind on me?” His low chuckle sent shivers through her. She didn’t answer. “Nah. We gon dance for real. Bachata.”
“Wait, Miles. I don’t how to—”
“Imma teach you. Two steps to the music. Thas all it is,” he showed her. Y/n mimicked him, each step hesitant and unsure, but Miles was encouraging and a surprisingly good teacher. “See? Easy.”
He raised his arms to spin her around and brought her closer. Y/n faltered. “Aye, come on, mami. I know you can move your hips better than that.” He repositioned, hands at her back and waist, his thigh between her legs, ruffling her skirt. Miles guided her across the floor, his fingers wandering to the trim of her cami, drawing a distracting trail of heat on her bare skin. Her own hands found their way to his nape, brushing his twin braids as they swayed to the beat. Soon she found her rhythm.
“There you go,” he praised, rolling his hips into hers. She followed. Her body trusted him. She trusted him wholeheartedly and fell into his lead.
They rocked together in silence, the song having long since ended. Miles nestled in the crook of her neck to breathe in the sweet scent of her perfume. “Thank you for helping me. I should have said so earlier,” Y/n said from above him.
“It’s my job, princesa.” Miles left the softness of her neck. “Eres mía.” You are mine. Y/n blinked while he returned to her warmth. She hoped he didn’t feel the way her temperature rose.
In three short months he made a place for himself in her life. He was the most unexpected surprise. She had a list of the ideal boyfriend and Miles Morales didn’t check off a single one. Yet everything never felt more perfect than in his arms, dancing to the distant sirens and traffic.
His phone buzzed from the end table. “Is that your mom?” He shrugged in response. “We should go.” Y/n suggested, but Miles’ grip only tightened.
“One more minute. They can wait.”
#iivri writes ˚·⊹ ⟢˖∿#iivri mail ·♡˖﹒ ₊˳#miles morales x reader#earth 42 miles x reader#miles morales#earth 42 miles fluff#miles morales x y/n#miles morales x you#miles g morales#miles morales prowler#prowler miles#atsv x you#astv miles#spider man: across the spider verse#miles spiderverse#fluff#marvel
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too sweet
two
eddie was in the crowd watching his girlfriend proudly. she’s an amazing performer. she was actually out of this world. eddie still couldn’t believe that he was dating one of the hottest female rappers out there. she gave him a chance.
he knows she’s too good for him. she deserves someone better than he could ever be but he’d never stop trying to show her how much he appreciates her.
once the show ends eddie heads backstage. he watches as she interacts with her fans before they all leave. he walks over to her and wraps his arms around her waist from behind.
“you looked so fucking good up there, baby.” eddie whispers in her ear. yn giggles like a school girl. she’d never felt so much love in her life by anyone she’s dated in the past. eddie was the perfect man.
“yeah? what was your favorite song?”
“i like the new one. what’s it called?” he whispers in her ear.
yn wasn’t shy when it came to her sex life. she had plenty of music for all the women out there to know their worth.men have been bragging about sex for centuries. she knows the world isn’t into women bragging about sex like a man does. yn didn’t give three fucks! she wasn’t shy in her music and she made other women feel better about their bodies and sexuality.
whenever she wrote a song she always made herself the prize, because in her eyes, she’s a fucking prize a thousand percent. she’s always believed that. sure sometimes she’s insecure. she feels like everyone has insecurities, but in the past whenever she’d been cheated on, she’d shrug it off, write, and ignored the pain. she’d pick herself back up, start dating again, and only hopes the next guy wouldn’t wound her. now, with eddie, he’s made it known she’s the prize.
eddie’s made her feel beautiful and sexy. she’d been nervous about giving him a chance. knowing his past, he wasn’t shy when it came to sex either. she’s heard their music plenty of times! corroded coffin wasn’t shy either.
when yn and eddie first had sex, it had been the best either of them ever had. yn has always been freaky and hasn’t found anyone to match her energy. not like eddie has!
eddie introduced yn to a whole new light and yn introduced eddie to her freaky side. they weren’t afraid to try anything at least once. if they’d liked it, they’d put it into their mental list and try it more.
yn still wrote music to inspire women and she’d still wrote music about her being the prize. it was no different with the newest song she just performed today. it was a little different though. she did compliment eddie a bit as well. ultimately letting the world know that eddie wasn’t going anywhere and she was very satisfied.
“you like? it’s coming out tomorrow.”
“mhm, i loved it, baby. and you’re absolutely have every right to laugh. ain’t nobody taking either of us away from one another, you hear me?” he smirks.
yn turns and kisses him passionately. eddie runs his hands all over her body. she yelps as he lifts her up and holds her tightly. yn moans silently as eddie squeezes her ass. when she pulls away he kisses her neck. the two forgetting about her team being right backstage. they didn’t really seem to care though when her manager clears her throat.
eddie continues to kiss her neck as she smiles and bites her bottom lip.
“yn!”
eddie groans as he pulls away. he glares at her manager as he gently sets her down. “sorry.” yn shrugs.
“you two need to get home before someone sees you. you’re lucky the fans didn’t see. don’t you want to keep this thing lowkey?”
“it’s fine viv. it’s not like that. we’re not keeping it a secret.” yn shrugs.
“i know that. the amount of paparazzi that follows you guys is crazy. and your pda is all over the place. it’s just—you two have been seeing one another for six months. i love you both dearly, but you don’t want people talking. they already think you’re just some stunt.”
eddie simply rolls his eyes. he didn’t really give a single fuck what anyone else thought about his relationship. they could think whatever the hell they want. eddie wasn’t going to let some rumors ruin what they have. he knew yn wouldn’t either.
“don’t care, viv. they can believe whatever they want. eds and i are serious.”
eddie hums in agreement. the couple soon hold onto each others hands as they head out to her car and drive off.
when they get to eddie’s, yn grabs him a beer and hands it to her boyfriend. she sits next to him on the couch as he cuddles up to her.
in the middle of watching some random show on the tv his phone rings. he laughs when he sees it’s eleven calling him.
“hey, what’s up belgium?” yn frowns whenever she sees her boyfriend stopped smiling. he sits up as he listens to the girl that was more like his sister.
“slow down, alright. i know, babe. remember what i told you, yeah? exactly! you’re gonna be alright. okay ill see you next week, yeah? i love you too babe.” eddie sighs as he ends the phone call. he runs his fingers through his hair. yn runs her hands up and down his back.
“what was that about? is eleven okay?”
eddie shakes his head. “mike and will are going apartment hunting. it’s just a lot for her. it sucks, you know?! i love mike and will too, but i don’t know, red and belgium have a special place in my heart. they’ve both been through too much.”
yn understood why. eleven hadn’t had much of a life. eleven was just three years old when her mom died in a house fire. she’d been staying with a friend of her moms while she’d work two jobs just to keep el well fed. unfortunately, before eleven’s mom was headed to pick her up the house caught on fire. for awhile she’d been tossed around from foster care to foster care. she’d been picked on and bullied. one foster parent even went as far as chopping her hair and the kids were so cruel they’d call her all kinds of names. At such a young age she’d skipped school, fell so far behind, she didn’t even know how to spell her name. she had given up on anyone ever loving her. that is until a special chief of police took interest in her. after jim’s own wife and daughter died, seeing eleven brought such joy in his life again. he’d end up fostering eleven before adopting her to be his own. el met mike and thought he was the cutest boy she’d ever seen. soon joyce and jim started dating and she gained two brothers. the girl finally felt love.
but she considered eddie more of her brother than will and jonathan. eddie protected her when she’d been younger, way before jim took her in. eddie saw kids his age picking on her when she had just been eight years old. he protected her from the losers who thought it was okay to be mean to a child. since then he’s been there for her. he even gave her a nickname when kids would call her shitty ones. she’d always loved waffles so he started calling her belgium.
max was a bit different. she moved to hawkins around the time eddie was on his first year of his senior year. she’d been a sweet kid but she’d been quiet. she wasn’t vocal around her step brother, billy. eddie found billy bulling max one day and got his ass kicked after defending her. he didn’t mind though, he was use to people throwing punches. he wasn’t one to fight back though. eddie was too kind for that. max had been timid and afraid to approach anyone. but she met four boys, and a really cool girl who didn’t give up. they all became friends soon after. billy had been a dick though! it wasn’t a surprise he was also a racist piece of shit. still, he knew billy still loved max, even if he had a shitty way of showing it. he had protected max one last time as he rushed into the burning mall just to get her out of there. ultimately he succeeded, he gone straight to the door, pushing max out, before the roof collapsed and he died in the fire.
max hadn’t been the same since. she struggled a lot after that and eddie was there to pick up the pieces. in a way, all the kids him and steve took on his wing had their own shit! but max and eleven were his sisters and he’d do absolutely anything for them both. maybe it’s because he saw a lot of himself in the both of them. all of them feeling unwanted, shunned, outcasted, freaks!
“i know. maybe—maybe when we go to hawkins we can spend a whole day with just max and el? we could take them anywhere they want to go. just the four of us!”
eddie looks at his girlfriend with hearts in his eyes. “you’d do that? you don’t even know them yet.”
yn shrugs. “eddie, they’re your sisters. i don’t know if ive ever told you,” yn playfully rolls her eyes before continuing. “but im not planning on going anywhere. that means they’re my sisters too. and id do anything for my family.”
eddie kisses her passionately. yn was a bit surprised but kisses back before pulling away to look him in the eyes. “what was that for?”
“just for being you, babe.” eddie whispers before the couple continues to watch tv.
so, it seems like this story is a bit of a hit. yes, im gonna continue it! im not quitting anytime soon. i appreciate the love, everyone. and if you like any of my stories, maybe you could spread the message!
i really love writing. not just for others but myself as well. i love the love i receive from everyone. thank you thank you thank you for supporting me. rather you comment, like, or reblog, it’s such a huge honor.
and please, do not hesitate to ask to be added to any taglist! i will gladly add you to anything i write. and if you wanna be added to a forever tag list, no matter if it’s for zayn, harry, aaron, eddie, or all of them, i will add you quickly!
i love you all and i hope you’d love me enough to support my writing. thank you xoxo
#jqhotchner#jqhotchner masterlist#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson#eddie munson x fem reader#eddie munson x reader fluff#eddie munson series#eddie munson x yn#eddie munson x fem!reader#rockstar eddie munson
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Sharing my first FFVII experiences for fun: (spoilers for a 25 year old game below)
-I have no idea when or how I learned who Sephiroth was. I just knew "oh yeah that's Cloud Strife and Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII". "Cloud has a big sword called the buster sword. Sephiroth has a big katana". Literally Cloud got into Smash and I'm like "Oh cool it's Cloud" But I knew NOTHING
-let me be clear, I haven't played a kingdom hearts game either. WHY I knew them both, I do not know.
-my brother introduced me to to One Winged Angel about a year after Cloud got onto smash. And I fell in love immediately. With the song. Yes, the song. He said "hey you should learn how to play this on piano". It took me 2 years to learn but that's besides the point. He showed me the Advent Children fight and I thought it was cool and all but it was really the SONG that got me.
-soon after he showed me Aerith's death. Why? There's this mash up of Spongebob's "stepping on the beach" and OWA and it WORKED?? But in the video they photoshop spongebob's face on Sephiroth when he kills Aerith. Then he kinda had no choice but to show me the actual scene (again, I had no context)
-So my brother bought me VII after he played it under the condition that I do not look anything up. No online walk through or anything, He was my only guide. He didn't want me spoiling myself with anything else that happened in the game, which was fair. Because he purchased VII for me, I listened. He was my only source of help.
-This lead to a few problems. Recruiting Yuffie without a guide is just AWFUL. I got lost and confused so many times. I never learned how to breed chocobos. I never got Knights of the Round. I didn't understand that stronger summons were just summons you got later, not a higher level materia. I didn't know about the single save point you can set in the Northern cave.
-Most inportantly: I never met Vincent.
-I had no idea how good of a healer Aerith was, so losing her abilities hurt. Yes her death still made me sad even though I knew it was coming. Ill argue it hurt the same amount because I watched every piece fall into place up to her death knowing what was at the end of the tunnel. But after it, I was so mad I had no good healers, I made Cloud my healer so I'd never lose them again.
-Two words: Black Materia. God I was not ready.
-Because I played it on a modern console, it had cheats like max health + limit breaks at all times, turning off random encounters, and triple speed. I did use triple speed a lot for farming sessions. And Though I made it through most of the game without the (basically) god mode, I did use them for the two robots in the elevator of Shinra Tower.
-I also used them through the entire Northern Crater because I didn't think the game was over yet. The third disk just started, I went straight down into the crater, and I didn't see a single save point. This couldn't be the end of the game, right?
-I literally did not acknowledge this was truly the end of the game until One Winged Angel began. I turned off cheats immediately and genuinely tried with what might possibly be the worst materia set up possible.
-I used Ramuh against Sephiroth. RAMUH. The man was doing so little damage it was pissing me off because "This materia is maxed out! Why isnt it doing more damage??"
-So after probably 10 Supernovas and at least 45 minutes, I turned cheats back on. I did not care anymore. NONE of my characters/materia were strong enough for this and I'd been playing for probably 4-5 hours straight at this point.
-anyway I had already seen and not understood any thing that happened in Advent children, so once I finished the game, I watched the movie again a few days later.
-Skip a few years and now we're here.
-oh I also never got that scene with Zack in the bottom of Shinra Manor.
-use a spoiler free strategy guide, kids.
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get to know the writer . . . hey there! —
what made you pick up the current muse(s) you have? i didn't know anything about final fantasy until a friend of mine who roleplayed in the fandom ( if you see this north... heeeey! ) recommended it to me. i didn't have a way to play the game myself at the time so i spent hours watching various gameplays on youtube and i wasn't surprised that my favorite character ended up being aerith. the majority of the muses i write on tumblr are characters who at their core are always full of hope despite all of the hardships they face. and that is the epitome of who aerith is. it's what she represents. i see a lot of myself in characters like that, and so, when introduced to aerith, i saw a version of me that i strive to be every single day. she's way cooler than me though. and i'm still not 100% sure that i write her well, but i enjoy doing it anyways.
is there anything you don't like to write? not trying to copy-cat ari here, but i've never written smut and probably never will. respect to those who can, but it's just not something i am comfortable with.
is there anything you really enjoy writing? i haven't written much on aerith but from what i have written... i really enjoy getting to delve into her past. aerith, although surprisingly outgoing, is pretty closed off when it comes to talking about what she's been through. when i write i have a tendency to tap into my muses internal monologue. i've never been good at world building, but i love the storytelling. getting to dive into aerith's past and seeing how she carries it with her in the present is always fun.
do you write in silence or do you play music? i write best with no distractions whatsoever. so, i usually don't have any music playing in the background. i can write with instrumentals playing, but if a song has words or is too loud, it can be extremely distracting for me. i can do both but i definitely prefer to write without.
do you plan your replies or wing them? i'm not used to plotting ( shy girl things lol ), so a lot of my threads start out as memes or come from starter calls. when i do replies i usually respond to threads that i have the most muse for first? and when i say the "most muse" i just mean the ones that i already have somewhat of a response in my head for. i don't force myself to write so i only write when i have the ability to do so.
do you enjoy shipping? yes! next question.
what's your alias/name? my alias is just the letter b and it's the first letter of my government name. some people know what it is and i really don't mind sharing it, but i just prefer going by b! i've gone by b for years now and it just feels weird to go by anything else lol.
age and birthday? twenty-four, may 9th 2000.
favorite food, color, and song? i am a sucker for hot wings!!! my favorite color is either a light/pale yellow or baby blue. i don't have a favorite song, but a song i've been listening to non-stop this week is history of men by maisie peters. annnnd favorite season would have to be spring/fall.
last movie and show you watched? my sister made me watch frequency (2000) and it was such a good film. even though it's been 2 years since my mom passed, we're still grieving. so movies like this are very healing for us lol. last show i watched was worst ex ever on netflix.
do you have a tumblr best friend? i consider myself close to everyone that i talk to on a daily basis. i don't like labeling friendships because all of the people i've met on here mean so much to me for different reasons! and i believe that i have many more friends to meet in the future. all of you are my besties. sorry not sorry.
tagged by: @onegil ( ty ari! ) tagging: @lightspeeds, @arachnidbit, @tragicale, @noblehcart, @controlsnature, @cloudvii
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How to do perfect staging: a lesson from Italy
I mentioned at some point I might actually make a post drooling over Italy's Måneskin performance and staging. I was kinda bored to be honest and decided against it but then all those trashy rumours that try to bring the winners down seemed so disgraceful and embarrassing to me that I decided again to do it. Now, the truth is that their performance was a little better in the semi-final introduction act. Perhaps this was due to the anxiety of the Grand Final. This is why I am going to use photos and gifs from that act and perhaps this will show to some that the perfect package might need a little bit of everything, and not just slap your language on the audience's ears with the expectation that this alone is always enough. *Did I make this too personal?*
Anyway, I digress. And I don’t mean that the Grand Final performance wasn’t still the best of the night, I just mean it wasn’t at the same God Tier level as the semifinal one.
Here's why the Italians took advantage of the Dutch stage until its very last millimeter and way more cleverly than any other country.
This is the only act that starts from the back of the stage, where the singer Damiano David waits for us alone.
Even with the rest of the 25 competing countries, this intro makes you forget that you are watching a contest with 26 countries as guests. Unlike anyone else, Italy looks like the host, like this place belongs to them and the frontman waits for you to show you around and possibly drag you to the world of Måneskin. In fact, you almost forget it’s Eurovision - this now looks like a Måneskin concert or, even better, a more private space of theirs with an ominous industrial feel. One of the most impactful things now is the lighting. Take a look at it. Almost all contestants throw all the lights on themselves or on some important prop they have prepared. The Italians are the only ones who chose to just light the stage itself. The simple white lights on the black stage give the impression of depth and it is the only act which shows emphatically the size of the stage. Why this? Well, we already established that in the first seconds the viewers feel they are in a new space belonging exclusively to Måneskin - the lights make us feel that their area is vast and dark and we are about to be drawn to its depths.
Damiano indeed guides us to the front as he sings, where the rest of the band are on the top of a platform. The other members won’t come down and join Damiano until he sings the appropriate verse “Buona sera, signore e signori” (=Good evening, ladies and gentlemen) and accompany it with a theatrical flamboyant bow (that feels very Italian). That’s when, technically introduced to the audience after the official greeting, bassist Victoria de Angelis and guitarist Thomas Raggi come off the platform and join Damiano.
There’s nothing excessive about the visual effects. Only the use of white lights that give the perception of depth and in the background the big shadows of the group’s silhouettes. They are in the front and they cast their shadows in the back; they create to you a feeling of being trapped by them but do you really want to escape?
When the second verse starts, Victoria and Thomas take the paths left and right of the stage and leave Damiano alone. They take even more advantage of the stage and in a typical classic rock band way. These two play with the side cameras but the focus is more on Damiano, whose verse sounds more like a tongue-twister. Since the cameras are rightfully on Damiano, I must now address the elephant in the room. Damiano is particularly attractive. In fact, the whole band is almost mind-bogglingly attractive and they clearly take a lot of care about how exactly they are going to look but Damiano, as the frontman, does especially so. So let’s talk about the outfit. They all have essentially the same outfit, however it is cut differently for each based on the person’s looks and personality. Isn’t it fantastic?
Damiano, who oozes confidence and sex appeal, has accordingly the most “provocative” outfit of the four. His chest and arms are bare so that his many tattoos can be seen. I’ll talk about the other outfits later as they all have their place in the... uh... white lights.
During the second chorus Victoria and Thomas return at the center and after the chorus it is time for the first solo; Victoria’s. The cameras are now on her but the lighting remains modest to accentuate the dark beat of her bass.
Victoria is the only girl of the group and the most dressed of them all - how refreshing! Her outfit is more similar to Thomas but she is buttoned up in the front. How does she wish to underscore her uniqueness as the woman of the band? But of course, with long flamboyant girly sleeves that come to delicious contrast with her aggressive stomping and her wide strides. Both her hairstyle and her outfit is inspired or basically just outright 70′s classic rock look.
It’s time for the bridge of the song right after her solo and Damiano has his attention on her and also draws the viewer’s attention to her some more. This part of the song is lower and softer - in relative terms - that’s why Damiano “chooses” her to sing it to. The lights now turn red, the intensity rises but there’s light flirtatiousness between them, with many smiles to each other and the camera that turns around them as they launch at each other playfully.
Then the song gets darker, more intense, the guitar stronger than the bass and Damiano’s voice turns to a scream. For this part, he turns to his bro, guitarist Thomas and he now draws the attention to him.
He grabs Thomas by the neck in an intense, intimate way (that doesn’t mean sexual, just intimate. His interaction with Victoria wasn’t sexual either). It is clear that through different ways Måneskin want to stress how good and close their relations are and that their singer, who is apparently a show stealer by birth, wants to ensure that they all get equal amount of attention from their audience. I love this.
True enough, nobody is left behind! The last chorus starts with a drums solo and Damiano goes up to the platform to now meet and introduce to us Ethan Torchio. Ethan stands up and his giant shadow is on the now blue background: this is the moment for the - so I hear - somewhat shy drummer to shine in his own aesthetic. The Italians leave none of their assets to fall down and Ethan’s impressive hair rightfully steals the show.
Just like Victoria and Thomas look alike, so do Ethan and Damiano, that’s why their costumes are the most similar. Ethan has a vest that covers him more than Damiano but leaves his arms bare. Because whose else the arms do you need to see if not the drummer’s?
This song has something peculiar because it was not a song originally written for Eurovision; it slows down in the end and does not end on some impressive note from the singer as usual but with the last solo we expect, that of the guitarist, because everything is fair in Måneskin! The focus has to leave Damiano, so now it’s the time for the visual effects to finally catch fire, literally, because nobody is allowed to take their eyes off them! Måneskin use a huge amount of pyro that however feels appropriate for the intense chorus and the ending guitar solo.
Thomas steps up for his solo and I forget we are in 2021. This is the most 70s thing I would ever hope to see.
In a hell of pyro, Thomas looks like he was tranferred right from a 70s rock ‘n roll concert. His outfit would be gladly taken by Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones. The unbuttoned jacket with this boho tie, such a classic 70s fashion touch. His haircut and even his FACE are the epitome of the 70s - what an ending sequence!
But hey we reached the end and this is Eurovision, the song slows down dangerously. Like I said, the Italians forbid us to get distracted. The attention must return to Damiano ASAP. Damiano says one last line and takes the audience with him to the very end with a death drop.
There you have it. Måneskin had me holding my breath for the full three minutes and I did not want to take my eyes off my TV. There are countless shows that are awesome - in this very Eurovision as well - but I was impressed by how they seemed to have found the perfect balance for everything in every single moment. They found the perfect stage concept for the song, they relied on visual effects only when they needed them and they stressed every twist and turn of their sound with a perfectly fitting move or interaction. They also all effortlessly could hold your attention and they made sure that they all would, with members often helping bring out other members. This performance was beautiful and, above all, clever which is why it was undoubtedly the worthiest of the win.
#eurovision#eurovision 2021#esc 2021#eurovision song contest#italy#italy 2021#maneskin#damiano david#victoria de angelis#ethan torchio#thomas raggi#music#songs#zitti e buoni#flashing tw#more
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Completely Random Agents of Shield Headcanons (Part 2)
Part 1
Daisy and Daniel's wedding anniversary is July 22nd. The day is the anniversary of Daniel's death in 1955. Daniel was actually the one who suggested that date. Daisy was very reluctant and confused, wondering why in the world he would want to choose his old death date, but Daniel convinced her with "You saved me that day." (Also it's the day 7x09 aired).
Despite the team not being in a formal work setting anymore (or very often), they all still pretty much call May, May, rather than Melinda. Phil is the only one who will call her that on a regular basis, and Mack and Elena will say it sometimes, but Fitzsimmons and Daisy still find it weird since they literally never called her Melinda before. In fact, there was a time when Daisy called her Melinda just to try it out. The two looked at each other, shook their heads, and laughed as they realized how weird it was, so she is just May, and May doesn't mind.
When really happy, Kora's body naturally emits warmth, and when she hugs people, they can feel this warmth radiate from her to them, and everyone pretty much loves it.
Also when Kora came back to 2019 with the team, she took 'Johnson' as her last name. Daisy was the one who suggested it given that Kora had said she actually didn't know what her last name was, so Daisy kinda just said, "You're my sister. Why shouldn't we have the same last name?"
Daisy visits Cal's veterinarian practice on a regular basis. He always has the biggest smile when she comes in, and everyone that works there knows her. Daisy always feels the sadness deep down within her, knowing that he doesn't truly remember their connection, but there are some moments that still make it feel like he's her father like when she first introduced Daniel to him. The happiest moment was when Daisy and Daniel decided it was time to finally adopt a dog, and they adopted a rescue from Cal's practice.
And the dog is either a golden retriever or a german shepherd (I might be biased towards german shepherds as my childhood dog was a german shepherd mix)
Each of the team members who have died at one point has their name on the Wall of Valor the number of times they had died during their seven years together. For example, May has gotten several students ask her, "Professor May, why is your name on the Wall of Valor twice?" This was Mack's idea.
Daisy will still sometimes use 'Skye' as a cover name for undercover work.
Polly Hinton invites May and Daisy to many of Robin's school functions (award ceremonies, holiday performances, festival nights, art shows, etc), and both of them make it a point to attend every single time. They even attend her high school graduation when that finally rolls around.
The team brought back their karaoke nights (it is canon that they had them in s2), and Mack made it a point to make "Don't You (Forget About Me)" a song they have to do every single time.
Alya's first word was 100% "Enoch", and Fitz is still pissed about it.
When/If the team starts having kids (excluding Alya), Mack and Elena are the first ones to have a kid (after already adopting Flint).
At some point, probably between seasons 1 and 2, Daisy got her GE Degree, and Coulson threw her a small party with the team and some of the new agents when she completed it.
This is more of a speculation than a headcanon, but what if Deke is not Alya's child? What if his mother is actually another daughter of Fitzsimmons? OR because the timeline changed, he may not even exist in the team's timeline at all anymore. Like Alya ends up pregnant and she actually has a girl, and Fitzsimmons are just like "Wait, what?" OR They have a son who has a son, and as the kid grows up, Fitzsimmons start to notice similarities and just go "Oh my god."
Coulson has taken all of the team's kids on joyrides in Lola at one point or another. Daniel nearly had a panic attack when he saw his and Daisy's tiny daughter in the passenger seat as Lola flew through the air.
Joey and Elena have lunch together very often. Mack and Flint tag along pretty often, and when she's free, Daisy is also invited as well and Daniel when he comes into the picture. They all also attend Joey and his boyfriend's wedding.
Daniel gets really into photography. After the typewriter, Daisy's next big gift is a polaroid camera. Eventually, he does own a more modern camera and he does have quite the portfolio on his smartphone, but he just loves his polaroid. He loves taking pictures of architecture and nature, but his favorite subject to photograph is, of course, Daisy. And once they have a kid, the kid is another favorite photography subject of his as they grow up.
One of the first things the team did after returning to 2019 after time traveling was going to a diner since their diner meal in s4 was cut short.
Alya and Davis' son actually become really good friends when they are older. (And if you think about it, Alya is actually older by like 2 or 3 years)
Every family takes turns hosting Christmas. After all the kids are born, May hosting and The Mackenzie-Rodriguez family hosting actually become the most anticipated Christmases
#agents of shield headcanons#aos headcanons#headcanons#agents of shield#aos#daisy johnson#kora#daniel sousa#melinda may#phil coulson#leo fitz#jemma simmons#alya fitzsimmons#robin hinton#alphonso mackenzie#dousy#mackelena#elena rodriguez
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happier | t.h.
tom holland x singer!reader
warnings: swearing and sad. fluff if you squint
summary: you wish tom the best with his new relationship in your new song. {listen to happier by olivia rodrigo (if you want)}
wc: 3.6k
'We broke up a month ago,'
"I've been thinking," your heart sunk at his words, "I'm always working." he grabbed both of your hands.
You locked your gaze in his. Sat in the living room of his shared flat. Inches apart yet you could already feel the separation between the two of you growing.
He avoided your eye contact, "I-I can't be in a relationship unless I can give one hundred percent of myself to the other person. A-and I know I haven't been doing that to you, which is c-completely unfair." he wiped away a tear from your cheek that you didn't know had fell, "You've been so, so good to me. I'm sorry I wasn't better, but I can't keep putting you through this." his voice was barely audible.
You finally tore your eyes away from his face. His tear soaked face. Choosing to stare at a spot over his shoulder instead. You took three deep breaths. In and out. Something about his words made you confused, but your pain overpowered it.
"Please say something. Anything." he whispered against your knuckles. Holding your hands to his lips.
You gently removed your hands from his grip, "Thank you for being mature and honest with me." you started with a sniffle, "Thank you for all of our memories and for showing me what love is," you cupped his face, "Thank you for everything, loser." your light laugh lacked any humour, but it still brought a slight smile to his face.
He held your hand that was resting on his jaw, "I love you more than life itself, darling." he kissed your palm and you felt your heart shatter. "Never hesitate to call, dummy."
You nodded with a sad smile. "I love you, too." You stood up and made your way out of the door. A year and a half down the drain within ten minutes.
'Your friends are mine, you know I know you moved on. Found someone new.'
"Do you guys wanna do something on Saturday? I don't have work. Maybe karaoke?" you asked the group without looking up from your phone.
Harrison made a confused noise, "Did you forget? We have Nadia's birthday par—" you heard a loud smack, "—Ow! What? Oh, shit."
You looked up to see Zendaya, Jacob, Harry, Sam and Tuwaine all glaring at Harrison.
"Absolute div." Tuwaine muttered.
You furrowed your eyebrows, "Who's Nadia?" you looked at all of them as they avoided eye contact. "Daya?"
She let out a long sigh before clearing her throat, "Um, Nadia is- Well she's kind of- you know, um—"
"—Tom's new girlfriend." Sam finished for her.
Your mouth formed an 'o' shape as you processed the information. His new girlfriend. It'd been a month and four days since he ended your relationship. And he had a new girlfriend.
It took him a month to move on. A month to be able to give a hundred percent of himself to someone.
You couldn't tell if you were more angry or sad. Maybe a mixture of both. Angry that your friends were hiding information from you, but at the same time you understood their intentions. Sad and upset because the boy who told you he wasn't ready to give a hundred percent of himself was already with someone new.
You slowly nodded, "Oh, okay. Well, I hope you guys have fun." you gave a tight lipped smile before looking back at your phone.
Everyone glanced at each other worriedly before allowing their gazes to fall on you again.
"How do you feel?" Jacob asked cautiously.
You locked your phone and set it on your lap, "I'm fine." you faked a smile, "I think I'm gonna head home, though. It's getting late and I have an early studio session. Bye." you quickly grabbed your purse and left with a small wave.
"Y/N! Wait—" the slamming of the front door cut Tuwaine off.
It was three p.m. and you weren't supposed to be in the studio until noon.
'One more girl who brings out the better in you,'
"Y/N/N. You need to talk about it sooner or later." Zendaya reminded you as she sat at the end of your bed with Harrison beside her.
You removed the covers from your face, revealing your tear stained cheeks, "Does she make him happy?"
There was silence from your two friends before they hesitantly nodded. Both weren't completely sure, but they assumed she did.
"Does she bring out the best version of him? Does she stroke his hair while they cuddle? Does she cook with him? Does she walk Tessa with him?"
Harrison sighed, "Y/N/N, we—"
"—Because that's what I did. I brought out the best side of him. I stroked his hair while we cuddled. I cooked with him. I walked Tessa with him. I did it all. Every single thing." your voice broke towards the end as you let the sobs rack through your body.
Harrison and Zendaya went to either side of you and held you. They just held you. Because even they didn't know what to do.
'And I thought my heart was detached from all the sunlight of our past,'
"Are you sure you're okay with this?" Zendaya asked as you walked towards Tom's front door.
You nodded and smoothed down your sundress, "Yeah. We ended on good terms. It's been two months or so. We're friends. Plus, I miss hanging out with all of us." you assured her.
She sighed before knocking on the door, "Alright."
A few moments later the door swung open revealing Tom. Dressed in black jeans and a white button-up. Sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Curls dangling over his forehead. A sweet smile on his lips.
You felt your stomach lurch. Air leaving your lungs involuntarily. Heart rate quickening. You could smell his cologne and every single memory with him clouded your mind.
"Hey! It's great to see you guys—"
"—Sorry. I-I think I left something in the car. One second." you rushed out the words before turning on your heel.
Zendaya let out a long sigh, "Fuck."
Tom frowned, "Did I do something wrong?"
'But she's so sweet, she's so pretty. Does she mean you forgot about me?'
"Y/N!" an unfamiliar voice called out to you from somewhere in the boys' backyard.
It was Harrison's annual barbecue get together. Nearly three months since your break up with Tom.
You turned towards the source of the noise and found a girl walking towards you. Brunette. Tight black dress with black heels. Body and face of a model.
"I've been dying to meet you! I'm such a huge fan. I basically live off of your music." she giggled as she hugged you.
You smiled, "Aw! Thank you! That means so much to me. You look amazing, by the way."
She laughed, "Thank you! But you're absolutely gorgeous! Sorry, I completely forgot to introduce myself. I'm Nadia, Tom's girlfriend."
Of fucking course.
You raised your eyebrows, but managed to keep a smile on your face, "Oh! I've heard so much about you! Well, Tom's one lucky guy," you chuckled, "I'd love to chat some more, but I need to use the washroom. Excuse me. It was a pleasure meeting you." you gave her a hoaxed smile before quickly walking away.
You were two feet away from the washroom when Zendaya grabbed your arm, "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost or something."
Your breaths were coming out in short puffs, "I just met Nadia?"
Her eyes widened before she dragged you towards Tuwaine's room, "Okay. Let's sit down."
'Oh, I hope you're happy, but not like how you were with me. I'm selfish, I know. I can't let you go,'
"You should move in here." Tom mumbled against your shirt.
You let out a small laugh, "You already have four roommates, love. One more might turn this into a barn."
He lifted his head off of your chest, "I'm serious. Driving from Manchester to Kingston all the time is such a hassle for you. We have recording studios here and it would make me the happiest man in the world if I could wake up to your gorgeousness everyday." he planted kisses on your forehead, nose and lips.
You chuckled at his boyish grin, "It's only a three hour drive and I'm sure the boys don't want me imposing on your time with them."
He quickly shook his head, "I already talked to them about it and they want you here, too."
You raised your eyebrows, "Well, if you're sure it'll make you the happiest man in the world, I'll think about it."
"You already make me the happiest man in the world, but I needed something to convince you." he rested his head on your chest again as you laughed.
'So find someone great, but don't find no one better. I hope you're happy, but don't be happier.'
"Are we ordering pizza?" Harrison yawned from beside you on the couch.
"Sushi?" you grinned hopefully.
Tuwaine shook his head, "We had sushi last night."
"Tom and I are making dinner for you guys!" Nadia reminded you from the kitchen.
Her arms wrapped around Tom's waist as he stirred whatever was in the pan he had on the stove.
You really hated their open floor layout at that moment since there wasn't a wall to block them from your view.
"Oh, yeah. What're you making?" Sam asked.
"Salmon with rice and steamed veggies." Tom answered without looking up from the pan.
Everyone made noises of realization as you turned to Harry, "Aliens or a tiger. Which do you think you could beat in a fight?" he asked.
You laughed before replying, "Hmm, depends. Are the aliens small or—"
"Tommy!" you heard a girly giggle and turned to see Tom with Nadia over his shoulder as they laughed and ran around the kitchen.
You quickly diverted your gaze to the coffee table. Forgetting about Harry's absurd question. All eyes were on you.
"What?" you asked when you finally looked up at your friends.
"Are you okay?" Harrison frowned from beside you before resting his head on your shoulder.
You let out a dry, quiet laugh, "Of course. As long as he's happy."
The looks of pity you received were almost as painful as the scene you witnessed moments ago.
'And do you tell her she's the most beautiful girl you've ever seen? An eternal love bullshit you know you'll never mean,'
"Premiere day!" Zendaya walked into your shared hotel room with a bright smile, Nadia following behind her.
You faked a smile as you applied another coat of mascara, "You girls look gorgeous."
Zendaya was in a red and black sequin gown. Hair down and heels on. Nadia was dressed in a maroon silk dress with a slit on the side. Black heels dawning her feet. Both had makeup and accessories on matching their attire.
You were in an emerald green gown with a slit running down your left leg. Silver heels and silver jewellery to match.
"So do you!" Nadia exclaimed as she sat on Zendaya's bed.
"Are the boys coming soo—" Zendaya got cut off by three loud knocks on the door.
"I'll get it!" Nadia jumped up and opened the door.
Tom was stood before her in a maroon suit. Matching her dress. Black dress shoes. Matching her heels. Glasses on and a bright smile.
You watched as Tom ran his eyes down Nadia's outfit, "Well, aren't you just the most beautiful girl in the world?" he planted a kiss on her lips as you witnessed with envy.
"Aw, Tommy. I love you."
"I love you more, darling." he grinned before looking behind her.
Heart wrenching pain struck you again.
You watched as his mouth fell open by the slightest bit. Eyes growing wider.
He quickly snapped out of his daze, placing a pearly white smile on, "You two look absolutely stunning."
You acknowledged his compliment with a curt nod.
Zendaya let out a laugh, "Yup. About to out do you at your own premiere."
'Remember when I believed you meant it when you said it first to me?'
"Green or white?" you held up both dresses against your body.
Tom looked up from his phone, "Both of them will look amazing on you, love."
You sighed, "I appreciate the compliment, but I am meeting Sebastian Stan tonight. Now is not the time for indecisiveness. One of them will make me look bad and I need to know which one."
The Infinity War premiere was in two hours and your anxiety was growing by the minute.
"C'mere." he motioned you towards him with a 'come hither' gesture as he sat on the edge of the hotel bed. You made your way towards him. Standing in between his legs as he wrapped his arms around your waist, "You are the most beautiful girl in the world. Absolutely gorgeous. You could make the ugliest dress look like something from a fairytale."
Your smile grew as he kissed your stomach, "Thank you, mi amor." you bent down and placed a peck on his forehead, leaning your head against his, you whispered, "Now, green or white?"
He chuckled and pecked your lips, "White."
You smiled before making your way to put on the white dress, "I love you."
"I love you more, darling."
'And now I'm picking her apart. Like cutting her down will make you miss my wretched heart. But she's beautiful, she looks kind. She probably gives you butterflies.'
"I don't like her." you murmured.
Zendaya chuckled, "Nadia? You barely know the girl."
You nodded, "And I don't like her. I don't like her giggles and her nickname for him. I don't like her hair."
You knew you were looking for things to dislike, but there weren't any. She was a fan of your music, she complimented you all the time. She was genuinely a great person.
She sighed, "No, you don't like the fact that she's dating Tom. If she wasn't, you wouldn't be saying any of this."
You rolled your eyes and glared at her, "Can you let me be angry?"
She laid herself down on your mattress, "Nope. If you wanna be angry, be angry at Tom. Nadia hasn't done anything to you. You're better than this."
"God, I hate your optimistic side sometimes." you threw a pillow at her.
She laughed, "One of us needs to be the optimist."
You sighed, "Do you think he misses me?"
"Yes." she replied without hesitation.
You sat up and furrowed your eyebrows, "What makes you say that?"
She let out a long breath, "You need to talk to him about that."
'I hope you're happy. I wish you all the best, really. Say you love her, baby. Just not like you loved me. And think of me fondly when your hands are on her. I hope you're happy, but don't be happier.'
"And you're dead." you dropped the controller on your lap as you defeated Harrison in Super Smash Bros again.
He huffed like a child, "Unfair. I taught you how to play, how'd you get better than me?"
"Actually, I taught her how to play. And I am ten times better than you." Tuwaine corrected him.
Harrison scoffed, "Whatever. Sweaty nerds, the both of you."
Nadia spoke up from Tom's lap, "Can I try?"
You nodded, "Who do you wanna go against?"
She chuckled, "I think I'll verse Harrison. Seeing as how Y/N just kicked your ass, I wanna at least have a chance."
Her comment made you laugh as you handed her the controller and watched them pick their characters. You watched as Tom set his phone down and focused on the screen where his girlfriend chose Pichu.
"Choose Kirby." Tom told her.
She furrowed her eyebrows, "Why? Pichu is so cute."
"Y/N always plays as Kirby and she always wins. With that stupid power absorbing ability." he chuckled as his eyes landed on you.
You felt your heart skip a beat at the small detail he remembered before you played it off with a light laugh, "Not my fault you thought Luigi could beat Kirby everytime we played."
'Ooo-ooo, ooo-ooo, ooo-ooo,'
You pressed on the keys of the piano in the boys' home. Singing your heart out. You still had your spare key and Harrison told you no one was home.
You were waiting for them to return from golfing so you could have your Sunday night dinners. It's been nearly four months since your breakup with Tom. Your album was due to be released on May twenty-first and you were letting the still evident pain fuel your lyrics.
"I hope you're happy, just not like how you were with me. I'm selfish, I know. I can't let you go. So find someone great, but don't find no one better. I hope you're happy, but don't be happier." you faded out the piano and pressed stop on the recording on your phone.
Writing down small notes about the song and things to tweak, your thoughts were quickly interrupted.
"I'm not."
Your head snapped up. Tom was leaning against the doorframe behind you. Tears escaping his eyes.
"T-Tom. I'm sorry. Haz told me the house was empty and I just started playing and- Wait. What did you say?" realization dawned on you.
He stepped closer and sat beside you on the piano bench, "I'm not happier. Hell, I'm not even happy." he gave a pathetic attempt at a laugh, staring straight at the black and white keys.
Your mind was trying to catch up with everything happening, trying to register his words, the state he was in. Grey sweats, black tee. Messy hair and red eyes.
"Why?"
He released a heavy sigh, "There's so many things you could be asking 'why' about. Why did I break up with you? Why am I with Nadia? Why am I not happy? Why the hell am I crying? Which one is it, Y/L/N?"
You blinked a few times, "All of them."
He sniffled and rubbed his face, "I felt like I was holding you back." he started, catching a glimpse of your confused expression, he continued, "You hadn't released any music in over year. There were so many articles saying that I was the reason that the biggest pop star in the world was quitting music. I didn't want to be the reason for that."
"You weren't and you aren't." you assured him.
He shrugged, "I just felt like you would do a lot better without me. And you are. Look at you, your fifth album is coming out next month." he nudged you with his shoulder, "I'm proud of you," he smiled.
"T-thank you."
He nodded, "Anyways, why am I with Nadia? Um, a few days after we broke up, I went to a friend's place to distract myself, as one does. She was there. She was a distraction. I never meant for it to get this far. You know, she actually asked me to be her boyfriend." he chuckled dryly to himself as you listened intently. "I guess, I thought it'd be easier to move on if I had something else to pour my love into?"
You nodded slowly, "Okay, I somewhat get that. So you really do love her?"
He quickly shook his head, "No, no, I don't. I mean, I can't. No one can truly love two people at once. And I think that answers the question of why I'm not happy." he paused and faced you completely, "I'm crying because hearing that song and hearing how evident your pain in it is, that will make anyone cry. I'm crying because I miss you and I miss us. I-I miss what we had and what we were. I miss your kisses and your stupid jokes that only you laugh at. I miss going on walks with you and Tess. I just miss you."
There was a long period of silence after his confession. You were trying to process all the information he was giving. He was cursing himself for being so straightforward. The longer it went without a response from you, the more anxious he got. He grabbed your hands, holding them to his lips.
"Please say something. Anything."
Déjà vu.
You swallowed, "You want honesty?" he nodded, "Okay, I was so mad at you. I-I was infuriated. Y-you told me you weren't ready to give a hundred percent of yourself and that you couldn't be in a relationship until you could give all of yourself to that person. Then a month later, you're with her. Making me feel like you just couldn't give yourself to me." you paused and shook your head, "You could've told me the truth. You should've told me the truth. We could've talked about it. We could've avoided months of awkward run ins and no communication." he nodded, still holding your hands in his, "I'm not gonna lie and say I don't miss you because I do, I miss you more than anything, but we shouldn't be doing this or saying these things while you're with her." you removed your hands from his.
He spent a moment looking down at his fingers. Releasing short breaths. "I don't want to be with her."
"But you are. And I don't want you to break up with her for me. Because that's not how things work, Tom. But you shouldn't stay with her either. Especially if this is how you're feeling. That's just unfair to her." you shook your head and felt your mind clear.
He nodded and met your gaze, "This is the end of us, huh?"
You shook your head, "I don't think there will ever be an end to us." you laughed dryly.
He agreed with a smile, "For forever and a day, remember?"
You nodded, "For forever and a day."
#tom holland#tom holland angst#tom holland fanfiction#tom holland fluff#tom holland smut#tom holland x actress!reader#tom holland x famous!reader#tom holland x osterfield!reader#tom holland x reader#tom holland x singer!reader#tom holland blurb#tom holland oneshot#tom holland x y/n#tom holland x you#tom holland fic#tom holland one shot#tom holland imagine#tom holland edit#tom holland series#tom holland and y/n#tom holland x fem#tom holland cute#tom holland headcanon#tom holland drabble#tom holland girlfriend#tom holland guitar#tom holland instagram#tom holland social media au#tom holland aesthetic
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wingman ~ yungblud
word count: 1476
request?: yes!
“can you do a one shot where colson sets up his little sister (the reader) with dom? like maybe she’s had a crush on him but he was with halsey and never wanted to get between that.”
description: who knew that your best wingman would be your own brother? and his main objective: setting you up with his best friend
pairing: yungblud x female!reader
warnings: swearing
masterlist (one, two)
The minute I walked into Colson’s house I knew something was going to happen. I didn’t know what exactly, but I just had a feeling that there was something going to happen. Call it sibling intuition or whatever.
It wasn’t uncommon for Colson to randomly invite me over to his place. We had always been close, so whenever he had time off he’d ask me to come visit him and Casie. I figured that’s what this invitation was for, but once I walked through the door, I wasn’t so sure.
“Colson?” I called.
Instead of my brother’s voice, a thick British accent responded, “(Y/N)!”
Dom came out from the living room and lifted me into his arms. I laughed through the shock I was feeling. I had no idea that Dom was even in town. I wondered if this was the weird feeling I was having.
“Good to see you, love!” Dom said. “I didn’t know you were coming today.”
“I didn’t know you were in town,” I responded.
“Yeah! I landed today actually. I haven’t been here long.”
“That’s awesome! Hey, let’s continue the catch up in a second. Is Colson here?”
My big brother was in the kitchen making sandwiches for himself and Dom. He looked up and smiled when I walked in. “Hey, you hungry?”
“I’m good, thanks. Did, um, did you invite me over because Dom is in town?”
“What? No, not at all.”
I raised an eyebrow at him. “You’re a terrible liar.”
He chuckled and walked away from me. I followed him out of the kitchen, realizing the conversation would be put on hold for now.
I sat next to Dom in the living room as he and Colson talked for a while. Every now and then he would ask me a question or two to catch up, but I was too awkward to really keep a conversation going.
As cliché as it is to say, I’ve had a crush on Dom for years. Ever since Colson introduced us, I’ve had some small feelings for him. Ironically, Colson was super supportive over these feelings. He always said how Dom was a great guy and that he thought we’d be a perfect match for one another. We did have the same type of energy, I had to agree with Colson there.
The big downside, though? Dom was in a relationship when we first met. With a friend of Colson’s, actually; Ashley, better known as Halsey.
So I just became one of those cliché, unrequited love stories. I tried to go on dates with other people to get rid of those feelings for Dom, but all my efforts proved to be void. There was just no one that made me feel the way that Dom did, which sucked because he wasn’t single.
After a bit of silence following another failed attempted to strike up a conversation, Colson looked at his phone and rose from his seat. “Oh, Emma just texted me asking if I could pick Casie up from school.”
“Oh, can I do it?” I asked, seeing a way to get out of this super awkward situation. “I feel like I haven’t seen Casie in forever.”
“I’d rather do it myself. I’ll bring her right back so she can see both of you.”
He left before I could protest anymore, leaving me alone with Dom. This was no doubt also a part of whatever plan he had in mind.
We were left in silence yet again. I tried to think of something to say to pick up the conversation but found myself at a loss for words. I never was good at talking to Dom when it was just the two of us.
“How long are you gonna be in town for?” I finally asked.
“A few weeks I think. Kells and I are gonna work on some new songs. We have like two or three already written, so we’re considering doing an entire album together, with Travis too.”
“Man, that would be the album of the year if you did. Everything you and Colson have done together has been absolute bangers.”
Dom chuckled. “So I’ve been told. I think he’s my favorite person to collaborate with, too. He just brings out a good side in me when it comes to writing songs.”
“I would’ve thought Ash would be your favorite person to collaborate with.”
I regretted it immediately after the words came out of my mouth, even though they were meant to be light hearted and in a joking manner.
Dom nodded, suddenly not as smiley as he had been before. “She was, but uh...we broke up a while ago so...no more collaborations I think.”
The news shocked me. I couldn’t believe I hadn’t heard it before now. Why hadn’t Colson told me? Or how hadn’t I seen the news online?
“Shit, I’m sorry,” I said. “I had no idea.”
“It’s alright. We kept the breakup pretty lowkey, actually. We weren’t even really public with our relationship, so we decided to keep the breakup the same way.”
How do I follow up from this? I wondered. Man, I’ve effectively killed this conversation.
“(Y/N), have you ever had a steady partner?” he asked suddenly. Before I could respond he added, “That sounds terrible now that I think about it. I don’t mean to say you bounce from person to person, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen you with anyone, or heard Colson talking about you dating anyone.”
“That’s because I haven’t really had a serious relationship,” I responded. “I’ve gone on numerous dates, but none of them have really worked out. I just don’t...feel a spark with anyone I’ve been with. I think...I think it’s because I have feelings for someone else.”
I tried not to look at Dom, as if he’d be able to decipher what that meant just by looking into my eyes.
“Why aren’t you with them, then?” he asked. “Don’t tell me whoever this daft bloke is turned you down.”
I chuckled and shook my head. “No, that’s not it. He’s a...friend of Colson’s, actually. He’s been in a relationship for a while and I don’t want to come between that. But it seems like my heart is set on him, so I’m having trouble trying to move on from those feelings.”
“That’s awful,” Dom said. “If this guy ever became single, do you think you’d try to tell him how you felt?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’d like to think I would, but then again he’s one of Colson’s best friends. I’d never want to fuck that over for either of them if the relationship didn’t work out.”
“You’re assuming there’s a high chance of that happening.”
“I’m assuming a firm 50/50 chance, as with all relationships. Besides, what if it doesn’t even reach that stage? What if I tell him and he doesn’t have feelings for me?”
“But what if he does? You’ll never know until you try.”
I looked at Dom and found myself caught in his eyes. He was looking at me so intently I was trying not to shift around in my seat, but I just couldn’t tear my eyes away from his.
“(Y/N)?” he said.
“Yeah Dom?”
His response came in the form of his lips against mine. I was shocked at first, pulling away just out of reflex. His face turned a bright shade of red almost immediately as he moved away from me.
“Sorry, I...I must’ve read the situation wrong. I thought - ”
Before he could finish his sentence, I quickly leaned forward and kissed him again. One of his hands cupped my cheek while were running through his messy mop of hair. I had dreamt of this moment many times, but nothing could’ve prepared me for the electricity I was feeling as I kissed Dom.
We were so lost in the kiss that neither one of us heard the door open, or heard Casie come running into the room. It was her voice exclaiming, “Oh, gross!” that brought the two of us out of our trance.
I quickly pulled away from Dom, sitting on the other side of the couch as I looked up to see Casie and Colson stood in the doorway of the living room. I tried to keep my embarrassment from showing, but the feeling of heat creeping up my neck informed me that that was going to be nearly impossible.
“I was coming to say hi and both of you guys are just sucking face!” Casie said. “That’s so gross!”
She raced up to her bedroom while Colson laughed at her reaction. The two of us waited for him to say something, anything, about what he had just walked into. Instead, he just smiled at us and said, “I guess my plan worked.”
#yungblud#yungblud imagine#yungblud x reader#dom harrison#dom harrison imagine#dom harrison x reader#dominic harrison#dominic harrison x reader#dominic harrison imagine#imagine#one shot#request#fanfiction#fanfic#fandom
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my ultimate guide to thiam fic !!
( as a new teen wolf stan )
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the classic post war, long ass (multi chapter) fic !!with great development that genuinely made me laugh out loud, they have the best friendship in this & i love it very much. ( like theo teaches liam to drive and i just *happy sobs* ) a fundamental in thiam fanfiction !! all stans have probably already read it but if you haven’t this is in fact a threat ,, go show this vv iconic story some love !!
Airplanes - Captainmintyfresh
Summary: After the Anuk-ite and the hunters are dealt with Liam needs a break. Cue Theo and a road trip that Liam should know better than to think will be peaceful.
Not Rated, No Archive Warnings Apply, Completed, 43/43 Chapters, Words: 236,875 (236k)
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okay okay so this one is also post 6B !! but ,, now we introduce fighting monroe & the hunters again ,, so we get the boys & a new mission !! so if you like an intresting plot 11/10 would recommend !! just to be clear this ISN’T complete ,, if that turns you off i understand but definitely give this one a read !! it litterally have theo doing crossword puzzles & fighting zombies
Vacancy Signs - LovelyLittleGrim
Summary: Theo and Liam are in Manhattan negotiating a pack allyship when the zombie apocalypse breaks out. Now, the two of them have to find their way back to Beacon Hills without getting eaten by zombies or killing one another.
Rated: Explicit, Graphic Description of Violence, Not Completed, 15/17 Chapters, Words: 89,605 (89k)
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Royalty AU !! I REPEAT ROYALTY AU !! a fantastic au where i stan their moms more than i stan them !! genuinely so good at the childhood rivals to lovers trope !! i’m genuinely obsessed with this one. has made me cry more than once ,, hurts in a good way <3 the ending is just *chefs kiss* also one of the tags is genuinely: # theo and liam make bad choices for over 130k straight !! if that doesn’t sound appealing i don’t know what does !!
Artificial Love - songbvrd
Summary: Prince Theo and Prince Liam are forced to spend every Summer together from age five onwards. They hate each other, and usually find ways to make each other miserable as much as possible in their six weeks together. But when they're reunited because of intended unions as adults, things change. They're both supposed to be married to noble women, but neither of them is as interested in anyone else as they are with their childhood rival.
Rated: Mature, No Archive Warnings Apply, Completed, Chapters: 32/32, Words: 172,935 (172k)
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so if you are in the mood for a crack fic that’s not explicitally a crack fic this is for you !! okay so i’m really hit or miss with AU’s ,, sometimes i feel like they don’t quite capture the characters right but this story have the BEST dramatic liam i have ever seen in my life !! basically they all live in the same apartment building & it’s fantastic !! i saw this one floating around a lot but the summary didn’t really unrest me until i have it a shot !! so go read it rn !! also nolan & brett are genuinely fantastic and make me wheeze ,, LIKE ACTUALLY VERBALLY LAUGHING !! all i’m gonna say is that my fav characters are scott & the beetles but that won’t make actual sense until you read it !!
The Neighbors Song - TheodoreR
Summary: “I always hear you singing on your balcony every morning, but suddenly you’ve stopped?”
Or the one where Theo annoys Liam every morning with his awful singing until he doesn’t anymore and Liam is even more annoyed. Liam hates every single thing about his mornings -the fact that they happen in the morning alone is enough. The thing Liam hates the most about his mornings though is the terrible voice of the guy who lives below him. He can’t sing for shit and Liam tried to politely let him understand that by throwing flour and water on his balcony, and also by shouting it to him, you can’t sing for shit!, and then by writing it into a note he proceeded to attach to his door, but this Raeken guy just keeps doing it, every single morning, like a fucking rooster. Liam did nothing to deserve this. He probably didn’t do anything to deserve better either to be fair, he doesn’t expect to open his window and be welcomed by some angelic voice singing him good morning, he’d just be happy with nothing. Silence. That’s something Liam can appreciate in mornings. Just some bark from his dog and the sound of his misery and that’s it. But no, god forbid the new guy lets him have that.
Rated: Explicit, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Wanrings, Completed, 8/8 Chapters, Words: 42,814 (42k)
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me: i’m not a big fan of AU’s ,, proceeds to talk about ANOTHER au… OKAY BUT THIS ONE !! it’s not complete but the author has been updating regularly ,, vv slow burn !! but in a REALLY intresting way !! i lOVE LIAM IN THIS SO MUCH ,, he is such a diaster of a person and it’s wonderful !! they have a great dynamic & i’m sucker for general puppy pack content ( and erica reyes being a badass ) !! also theo plays lacrosse in this & i really like it ahhhhh ,, also liam is just being an artic monkeys stan the whole time & theo is like *que confused repressed gay noises*
Inglorious Roommates - honeyscape
Summary: A roommate is defined as “a person with whom one shares a room.”
Theo would say a roommate was more along the lines of, “The person who's the bane of his existence. The weirdo that sleeps for days. The spaz that exercises at 3am. The guy with a revolving door of annoying friends. An insufferable human being that Theo has no control over living in his room.”
Example: Theo hates his roommate Liam.
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okay okay i hate myself but i have another WIP for y’all !! this one is jUST FANTASTIC. i’m genuinely so upset it’s most likely not going to updated again *incoherent screaming ensues*. for this story ,, it’s very theo-centric bUT thats bc it ends right before liam becomes a concrete member of the story !! ANYWAY: basic plot = theo & acquiring not one but two children ,, so #dad theo but he is still crusty & homeless and i love him very much. it’s just so GOOD !! just read if you want to experience my fav theo coming out story & him etching high school musical
Look who's talking - Captainmintyfresh
Summary: Theo had been labeled many things in his life. Evil, failure, monster. He'd never thought Father would be one of those things but as he looked across the table to a six year old with blue smears of bubble gum icecream across her face trying to coax the first words out of her sister. Finger jabbing towards Theo's face as she repeated 'Daddy' again and again he couldn't bring himself to dispute the label.
(Theo accidentally adopts two young werewolves)
Not Rated, Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings, Not Completed, Chapters: 16/?, Words: 48740 ( 48k )
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so here me out: post-canon ( poetry like angst ) summer get away !! just the boys doing cute little domestic things together whilst pining !! theo’s guilt in this is just so powerful & aGjffkgkkfkvkdlv !! i think it’s so interesting to see how they interact in this one, it’s just very heart warming !! and it features one of my favorite niche teen wolf tropes of theo being great with like seven year old girls- it’s just so good ,, very much a wonderful little one shot that just makes your heart happy.
(next time i see you you'll show me) a hundred different ways to say the same things - cherrysprite
Summary: “...You deserve good things,” Liam says eventually. He makes sure not to look at Theo even though he can feel his eyes turn on him. Somehow he can already tell that Theo doesn’t believe him.
Liam instantly makes that the goal of this summer - making Theo believe him.
Rating: Teen and Up, No Archive Warnings Apply, Chapters: 1/1, Words: 28875 ( 28k )
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okay so this next section of fic recs is a bit different !!
two of my favorite authors !! and a compilation of fics i’ve read by them both !!
for context: these two have written some genuinely gorgeous fics, like pure poetry, they explore the real gritty & scary side of our boys relationship in such a wonderful way. they’ve both used some of my favorite tropes & i love them very much !!
whenever i need something soothing but so genuinely intresting & enticing these are my go to !! ( also they both write a lot of good nolan angst & some vv good fics with hayden )
go check out:
eneiryu
as well as fallingforboys
here are some of my favorite fics by them ~
darling i want you here in my arms (kiss the pain away, i know you can) - fallingforboys
even before you touched me, i belonged to you (all you had to do was look at me) - fallingforboys
memories linger like tattoo scars (but your touch on my skin is just as permanent) - fallingforboys
skin, bones, a stolen heart, and an ugly creature lurking underneath -fallingforboys
i don't know how to breathe in the place i called home - fallingforboys
whisper your gossamer truths into the shadow, maybe you'll find the answers you're searching for - fallingforboys
between the mountains and the valley we built a monument to our regret - eneiryu
cracked the hinges of the cage and waited for you - eneiryu
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okay and finally: since i am a self centered whore
my own fic: an rendition of the # elevator scene
it’s basically my version of post canon if we did get the kiss in the elevator. we got a classic liam pov in which he is has 12/10 for extreme bi diaster energy even whilst being shot at !! so go him ig…
Fuck Off, Fuck This & Fuck It! - nefelibata_peach
Summary: Liam thought to himself heart rate climbing, they were bound to be dead by morning. So he thought with everything but his brain and he kissed him.
Where Liam Dunbar is very confused, slightly traumatized, and just a bit scared but hey, aren't they all! Bad decisions ensue as two boys fight in a war they never did sign up for.
Rating: Teen and Up, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Chapters: 1/1, Words: 3558 ( 3k )
#this took me so long#please go read these or i’ll cry#fan fiction#fan fic recs#teen wolf fic recs#thiam fanfiction#thiam fic recs#thiam#theo raeken#liam dunbar#theo x liam#teen wolf fandom#teen wolf gay#teen wolf#ao3#fuck you fuck this & fuck it#thiam fanfic rec#thiam fanfic#thiam is endgame
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europe - request
pairing: sebastian stan x singer!reader (seb!pov)
summary: singer!reader writes another song, this one is about seb
warnings: suggestive content (*wink wonk*), language, the works ya know
a/n: this took so long bc im not lyrically inclined and there isn’t even that many lyrics in here. i can’t even guys this was a nice break though. i liked the concept, i hope i lived up to your dreams. :)
p.s.: my requests and tag lists are both open loves!
check out my other writing on my full m.list
Sebastian was doing a press interview for his new movie. It was his first on television interview. First time being back in the studio for The Late Late Show with James Corden. First time since you and him had gotten together. He was eager to see what James had in store for him.
He was wearing a bright yellow shirt paired with a red leather jacket. His legs were clad with a different pair that he wanted to wear originally because you couldn’t get quite enough of his thighs. Had he worn the other pair, there would’ve been a prominent wet spot on one leg where you rode him to your own satisfaction. The memory made him bite his lip and adjust his pants to try to quell his oncoming boner.
“Good luck out there tonight, lovey. You’re gonna crush it.” Your voicemail warmed Sebastian’s heart. He missed you a lot, but you were currently on your own press junket. Your new album finally came out and your manager had been running you ragged. Sebastian was so proud of everything you’ve accomplished, and he wasn’t afraid to show it.
“Hi, Mr. Stan. You’re needed on deck in five minutes.” He nodded at the assistant producer who stuck her head in his dressing room. Sebastian ran his hands through his hair one more time before deciding enough was enough.
“Well, this is as good as it's gonna get.” He murmured to himself as he walked out of the dressing room. He rolled his shoulders, snuggling into the leather jacket encasing his back. Sebastian took a swig of a water bottle from the table backstage. He still got nervous when doing interviews, always worried that he’s going to say the wrong thing.
“And now I would like to introduce our next guest. You’ve seen him as Bucky Barnes in the Marvel Cinematic Universe for the last ten years. He’s played the borderline psychotic Jeff Gillooly in I, Tonya, and the corrupt Sheriff Bodecker from The Devil All The Time. It is my pleasure to introduce the one, the only, Sebastian Stan!”
James stood, clapping as Sebastian made his way to the main set area. He raised his right hand, his left remaining on his stomach. As he approached James, Sebastian switched hands, his left coming up as an offer for James to shake. Afterwards, James held his hand out to the chair beside his desk, waiting for Sebastian to sit down.
“Hi, Sebastian! It’s so good to have you back.” James’ accent broke Sebastian’s name up into three distinct syllables, bringing a smile to Seb’s face.
“It’s good to be back, man.” He grinned big, waiting for James to ask the first question. Once they got into it, the interview went smoothly. Sebastian was able to avoid giving out spoilers for his new project, leaving just enough to the imagination. James was in a fit of laughter after Sebastian had told a crazy story from being on set. James wiped tears away from his lower lashline, calming down just enough to catch his breath.
“Okay, so I want to move onto something else.” Sebastian sobered up quickly, unsure of where James was taking the conversation. “We want all the juicy details about your relationship with Y/N.” Sebastian’s brow raised as he pulled a face at James’ question. He laughed to himself for a minute before answering.
“Ya know, we really have you to thank for that.” Sebastian pointed at James, before bringing that same finger to rub his eye.
“Really?” The man’s voice pitched up, brows hitting his hairline.
“Oh yeah. We were only introduced because of your show.” Sebastian leaned back in his chair, remembering that night with you. The two of you had gone out for drinks, talking for hours at the bar and then even longer in his hotel room. He remembered waking up with you wrapped up in his arms. You didn’t have sex that night, but you definitely did the second night.
And oh god, if that second night wasn’t just as amazing as the first. The face you made whenever you climaxed danced it’s way to the forefront of Sebastian’s mind. Not good, definitely not good. He had to readjust himself in his pants again, crossing his legs to cover up his rather large problem.
“Yeah, we started dating that same week. Kept it quiet though.” Sebastian held his palm out in the air, bouncing it up and down.
“Right, right. And do you want to tell everyone how you did end up revealing that you and Y/N were an item?” Sebastian looked down at his lap, smirking to himself. “Or should we just play the clip?”
A clip played for the studio audience. It was Y/N doing her makeup for the Vogue Beauty Secrets Youtube video. Sebastian waltzed in the background of the shot. It then cuts to Sebastian kissing Y/N on the cheek, brandishing the hickey’s that she had sucked onto his cheek the night before. Mhm, I remember that night too.
Sebastian had surprised Y/N by coming to see her. He wasn’t doing anything and he missed you, so why waste a perfectly good opportunity. He spent the night there completely ravishing you until you begged him to stop. That night he proudly wore your thighs as earmuffs, burying his face in you. He really needed to stop reminiscing during an interview.
“How adorable. Was that planned at all? Or did you just do that because you could?” Sebastian shook his head, his right hand scratching at the stubble decorating his jaw.
“Oh, no. It definitely wasn’t planned. I honestly don’t remember if I knew Y/N was filming that morning, so I’m just glad I put on pants before I left the bedroom.” James laughed at Sebastian’s comment.
“Okay, so I’ve gotta ask your opinion on something though.” Sebastian made a hum of acknowledgement, signalling for James to continue. James leaned back, pulling out a cardstock of your new album. “So, this is Y/N’s new album, it just came out about three or four weeks ago?” The crowd clapped for you, and Sebastian cheered along with them.
“What do ya want my opinion on? If it’s the album, then I gotta tell ya, I loved it. Every single song on there is absolutely amazing.” James nodded, a smirk forming on his lips making Sebastian think he made a mistake.
“So you’re aware of the song Europe?” Sebastian smirked, nodding his head because he knew where this was going. “Would you like to tell us what that’s about?” James laughed as Sebastian stammered, looking for the right words. “I mean, let’s just read some of the lyrics.” James looked at the cards in his hands as Sebastian drifted into his thoughts again.
You had brought him into the studio before finalizing Europe. He remembers watching you twist your hands at your waist and continuously cracking your knuckles. Sebastian was curious because you hadn’t ever been like that when showing him a song before. Every question he had about your anxiety revolving around the song was thrown away when he heard it.
Europe was an ode to Sebastian, all of Sebastian. He couldn’t help pulling you down onto his lap by your waist as he listened. You were the only two in the studio, so the two of you were free to do whatever you wanted. The funny thing about that night was that there was a new track recording.
“Oh shit, Seb.” The dam broke afterwards, peels of laughter leaving your lips without explanation. Your right hand raised to your mouth, attempting (and failing) to quiet your giggles.
“Babe, why the ‘oh shit’?” You held up a finger to your lips, telling him to be quiet and listen. He strained his ears, waiting for his own ‘oh shit’ moment. Then, his own voice filtered into his ears, making him crease his brow in confusion. “What is that?”
“That’s the audio from when I first played you Europe.” Small giggles passed your lips again. “I was going to ask you if I could use, like, a sound byte from it for either the beginning or the end of the song.” Sebastian nodded, slightly amazed that you were so creative with your work. “But, I forgot to turn off the recording.” Sebastian’s eyes locked on your expression, waiting for him to connect the dots. He pulled a face and then,
“Oh shit.” His eyes widened, a huff of laughter escaping. “Wait, so it caught all of it?” Your lips rolled inwards, holding back laughs as you nodded your head. Sebastian raised a brow, his eyes flicking over your face. “Use it.” He had a few new hickeys after that night too, but not after decorating your body with a few of his own.
“Sebastian, I would like you to read a few lines from the song, please.” James handed Sebastian a card, a snort leaving Sebastian’s body involuntarily. He glanced at the cards, know the lyrics by heart already. He took a big breath, reading the lines that James chose. He threw him a look with his eyes, head tilting slightly toward the British man.
“Uh, okay, here we go.” Sebastian laughed to himself, blowing out a breath through clenched lips. He lifted the card again, “You know,” dropping his hand back to his lap while raising his other hand. “You know, she’s gonna make fun of me for this right?” James laughed, looking into the camera as if he was on The Office, then to the audience with a duh look on his face.
“Sebastian. We’re going to make fun of you.” The crowd didn’t hesitate to join in James’ amusement. Sebastian dropped his head into his hands, groaning loudly. “Do you need a little encouragement?” The audience began cheering and clapping for Sebastian.
“Fine, alright, alright.” He shook his head before starting. “Long nights with hickeys earned like a badge of honor. Teasing kisses, twisted sheets, all signs of true seduction.” Sebastian looked up from his hands, expecting James to say something. All James offered, though, was a wave of his hand for Sebastian to continue. “I never have to worry because all my sins are forgiven when I’m with you.” James held his hand up, stopping Sebastian from continuing.
“Okay, let’s dissect that, Mr. Stan.” James propped his elbow on his interview desk, placing his head at an angle in his palm. “What is this song about?” Sebastian’s lips curled inward, stopping himself from laughter.
“James,” Sebastian leaned forward against the arm of the couch. “I thought this was a family show.” The British man quirked a brow, sweeping both hands in front of his body gesturing to the studio.
“This is the Late Late Show, Sebastian.” He turned back to the audience, addressing them and the cameras. “And that is all the time we have tonight! Thank you to Sebastian for coming on the show with me tonight! And thank all of you for tuning in tonight. We’ll see you next time.” The producer beside the camera signaled that the show ended and Sebastian turned back to James.
“It’s a good song.” Sebastian smiled wide afterwards, saying his goodbyes to the crew. He was back in the safety of his dressing room when his phone started ringing.
“Hello?” He knew that it was you from the personally assigned ringtone you picked out when he wasn’t looking.
“The Internet is going to eat you alive.” Sebastian grinned as your peels of laughter trickled in through the speaker of his phone.
“Oh yeah, could you imagine if I told them that it wasn’t just random sounds at the end?” He could just imagine your smirk at his mention of your little addition to Europe.
“We’re gonna have to do that again.” Sebastian paused, waiting for you to explain. “Although I think next time we should do a visual along with the audio. You pickin’ up what I’m putting down Stan?” Sebastian smirked to himself, thinking about being able to watch himself bring you to the brink over and over again, even when you’re not together. His pants got tighter at the idea.
“I think we might have to look into that, Y/L/N.”
#sebastian stan x reader#sebastian stan x you#sebastian stan x y/n#sebastian stan imagine#sebastian stan fanfic#sebastian stan fan fiction#sebastian stan fan fic#sebastian stan#seb stan x reader#seb stan x you#seb stan x y/n#seb stan imagine#seb stan fanfic#seb stan fan fiction#seb stan fan fic#seb stan fanfiction#seb stan#seb stan x singer!reader#seb stan x singer!y/n#sebastian stan x singer!reader#sebastian stan x singer!y/n#sebastian stan x female reader#sebastian stan x f!reader#seb stan x f!reader#seb stan x female reader#seb stan x famous!y/n#seb stan x famous!reader#sebastian stan x famous!reader#sebastian stan x famous!y/n
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mother’s day. | harry styles.
summary: it’s mother’s day and harry makes you breakfast in bed, no thanks to your little baby’s help.
pairing: harry styles x fem!reader
wc: 2.4k words
warning(s): all fluffy like cotton candy <3
a/n: (disclaimer: gif belongs to @harrysimpact) happy mother’s day everyone! enjoy this fic about husband/dad!harry !! make sure to reblog and comment if you like it, consider donating to my ko-fi too if you like this or any of my other writings. all the love <3
The sun is just rising when Harry wakes up; even for him it’s very early and he’s usually a morning person. He rubs the sleep out of his eyes and stretches, feeling a pop between the muscles as he does so. He makes sure to switch off any alarms to ensure his wife doesn’t wake up soon. He even switches off the baby monitor next to her bedside table too, hoping their baby doesn't wake up so soon either, though it would be inevitable knowing she’ll cry for milk.
It’s mother’s day. What’s more exciting is that it is your first mother’s day as a mother.
Over the last year, you have found motherhood to be as challenging as you expected. It started off with the morning sickness and strange feeling of not bearing a certain smell. At that point, both you and Harry had already discussed having children. It’s something the both of you always wanted and you knew yourself that Harry would be an amazing father to your children. The thought of having a little human that was half of you and half of the person you love and adore, running and playing around the house as your husband playfully chases after them in your backyard while you watch with awe. It was a cute little dream in your heads that soon became a reality.
You both cried when you found out about your pregnancy. It was a momentous and exciting moment for you. Over the several months during your pregnancy, Harry had grown a bit overprotective about you and your little bub, yet you don’t really blame him for it and assumed it’s just his pre-fatherly instincts kicking in. Harry had always made sure to accommodate to your (weird and odd) needs and cravings. He’d happily wake up in the middle of the night and get you both some snacks, despite being tired himself.
Your favourite part though, is whenever Harry would talk to little bub. Even when you weren’t showing yet, he’d always talk to the baby girl in your belly, occasionally singing to her, telling her how much daddy and mommy loves her and that he’ll always be around to look after her. That makes you cry sometimes, because you knew already that he is the best dad to your baby.
Little Amy was soon born before you both know it. You still remember holding the little human of your own in your arms, all swaddled up in a fluffy blanket, her eyes wide open as she was introduced into this whole new world. She had captured both of your hearts and you both knew it. She was the most precious person you’ve laid your eyes on and you both love her immensely.
Harry for one could not believe that he was finally a father, considering he’s always dreamt of having a little family of his own. It was up until the delivery that he remembers how much you’ve given to carry Amy and how amazing you are to have carried and nurtured her for so long. He’s never loved anyone even more than he loves you and now with Amy.
Harry intentionally wakes up earlier than you today, despite his schedule begging for him to sleep again. He looks over you next to him, seeing that you’re still huddled up under your thick blankets and your face pressed against your pillow. He takes notice of your chest rising and falling from every breath you take and how pretty you look on this morning.
He leans over and plants a small kiss on your head, careful to not wake you as he gets out of bed. He pulls on a pair of sweatpants and walks out of your room, gently closing the door behind him.
He makes his way across the hall to where little Amy is sleeping in her nursery. He wouldn’t be surprised if she’s already up at this hour, probably so she could cry out for some food or comfort from her parents. Harry slowly opens the door, he can already hear the soft sounds of Amy moving around in her crib.
It’s almost as if she’s been waiting for him to come because her head perks as he leans over her crib. “Good morning, my little bub,” he says gently to her, already smiling so bright at the adorable little human looking up at him. Amy looks up at him with the same bright smile, her limbs flailing around in excitement as she sees her father.
“Da,” she says, giggling as he caresses her head lovingly. Her arms reach up, signalling that she wants to be carried like the little princess Harry says she is. He gladly picks her up, letting their noses nuzzle against each other before he kisses her head.
“Y’know what today is, bub?” Harry asks Amy. Amy merely stares at him, not understanding a single word, with the same green eyes she inherited from him. It still makes him choke up just thinking about it. Amy coos as her little hands trace over the swallow tattoos. “Today’s Mother’s Day,” he says in an excited voice, and he chuckles at the way her head perks up.
“Mama?” She asks, her green eyes staring innocently and adorably at him. He nods, bouncing her lightly in his arms as he carries her out from the room.
“That’s right, bubba. It’s mama’s day, and you’re gonna help me make her breakfast. Except you won’t really be doing anything but watching me and keeping me company. Let’s be honest, your cooking skills aren’t the most helpful yet, bubs,” he tells her as they enter the kitchen, setting Amy down in her high chair.
Amy giggles, seemingly finding whatever Harry said funny. He grins at his adorable little baby, sometimes all he wants to do is cuddle with her and smother her with all the love he has for her. “Yeah bubs? Gonna help me or sit here lookin’ cute and adorable while daddy cooks?” He asks as he leans down so his face is levelled with hers. Amy simply giggles and nods at his father, even though she tends to nod at nearly everything they both say to her.
Harry laughs and kisses her chubby cheeks. “Love you, my little bub,” he tells her. She babbles at him as her hands reach for his face. “Yeah, love me too? I think you do,” he says, kissing her little nose which makes her giggle again.
Harry begins to make breakfast as Amy sits and watches him, babbling and cooing at him as he does. He nods and talks back to her like they are having a simple conversation, him simply agreeing with whatever she says.
“Want a bite, bub?” He holds up a piece of strawberry in front of Amy and he grins widely as she tries to reach out for the red fruit. “Taking that as a ‘yes, please’,” he jokes as he bites off a tiny piece of the fruit for her to take. Amy hums in delight as she munches. He watches in awe of the little baby as he eats the rest of the fruit.
At one point, he heats up some milk as Amy starts to get fussy.
Harry doesn’t make much for breakfast, simply making some half boiled eggs, french toasts, some cut up fruits and coffee. He hums in the tune of one of his songs, Amy bobbing her head as she drinks her milk, enjoying this quality time with her father as he hums and sings to her. It is no doubt that she has grown familiar with the songs he sings to her. Harry’s convinced that she must’ve heard him even when she was still in your belly.
As he watches the oil sizzling around the bread, he feels two arms wrapped around his waist and a head on his shoulder. He grins at the familiar touch of his wife. It’s amazing how the both of you have grown familiar to each other’s touch through all the years.
He turns around, keeping a hand on the handle of the pan and the other arm wrapped around you, kissing your head. “Morning, my love,” he says, laying his head on hers. “Morning, baby,” you mumble out in a tired voice. “Bed was cold,” you pout as you stifle a yawn from your mouth.
He chuckles at your tired state, knowing how much you enjoy waking up next to him instead of an empty bed space. “Happy Mother’s day, lovie,” he tells you, smiling as he sees how your face lights up at his words. You couldn’t believe it yourself that you’re able to spend this special with your little family. “Thank you, bubs,” you beam at him, leaning up to kiss him. Harry hums into the kiss, his lips moving slowly against yours.
A baby’s babbling snaps you both from the kiss you shared, you could see your baby girl whining as she reaches out for you. You both laugh at this, breaking away as you walk over to her. “Hello, my little baby love,” you say as you kisses all over her face, eliciting giggles from Amy. “Mama,” she says, nuzzling her face into your neck.
“Have you been helping daddy cook?” You ask her as you brush through her soft curls. You hear Harry scoff behind you as you say this. “She hasn’t been helping at all, just bossing around in her little high chair,” he says jokingly, Amy laughs at his fake pouty expression directed at her.
“And you,” he says as he turns off the stove, walking over to you. “Should be in bed. Was gonna bring ya breakfast in bed as a surprise. All romantic and shit.” You slap a hand on his shoulder as he curses. Harry laughs at this as he wraps his arms around you. “Don’t swear around her,” you tell him with a fake angry tone.
Amy pays no attention to them, busying herself by finishing her little bottle of milk. You turn around to face him, hanging her arms around his shoulders. “Now, I feel bad. I could just run back up, pretend to be asleep until you come in,” you suggest, running your fingers through his curls. He sighs at the comforting feeling.
“Mmm. The surprise is kind of ruined now, so,” he shrugs as he says in a matter of fact. You roll your eyes at him. “Well, I still would love to have breakfast in bed with my baby and my handsome and loving, made by said husband,” you say cheekily at him.
Harry grins at you, resting his forehead on yours. “Handsome and loving husband, huh? Gotta be one lucky bloke to have married an amazing woman,” he teases, making you throw your head back laughing. “Alright then,” he says, patting your bum. “Go on then. Pretend you’re sleeping, give me an award-winning performance when I come up.”
You hum as you give him a quick peck on the lips. “See you in bed, my handsome husband!” You call out behind you as you make your way out of the kitchen. Amy puts down her finished bottle and frowns as her mother goes off. “Mama?” She pouts at her father.
Harry comforts her as he kisses her head. “We’ll join her in a bit, Amy. Gotta get breakfast ready.” She coos in response as she traces over the butterfly tattoo on his stomach.
Harry puts Amy in the baby sling they bought for her as he prepares the food on a tray. He coos at her as she cuddles up on his chest, loving the warmth he radiates. He slowly balances the food tray as they ascend up the stairs to your bedroom.
When he pushes the door open, he sees you in bed, seemingly asleep, although the hint of smile on your face would say otherwise. He gently sets the tray down on your bed. Amy is already reaching out for you as he sits next to you.
He shakes you gently. “Wake up, lovie.” Your eyes flutter open, smiling sweetly at your two loves. “Hello, my loves,” you say to them. You both laugh at the silliness as you lean up to kiss his lips. You take Amy out of the sling and set her on your lap.
“So, was my performance worthy of an award?” You tease him as you kiss all over Amy’s face, making her giggle.
“Oh yeah, definitely. Couldn’t tell you were acting,” he plays along.
You sniff in the delicious scent of food laid out in front of you. You moan in delight as you lay your head on his shoulder. “I love you. Thank you.”
“I love you too, honey.” He kisses your head. He kisses you again, long enough for the feel of his lips to linger on yours. “Happy Mother’s day,” he says lovingly, taking a piece of the french toast he made.
You beam at him as he entertains with Amy’s babbling. And you think to yourself, you would much rather just stay at home, order in food and watch movies in bed with them today. Perhaps Harry might be up to take a nice bubble bath when Amy has her usual afternoon naps.
Truthfully, you couldn’t wait to spend more Mother’s Days, as long as you are with your two loves. And hopefully, with more little ones in the future.
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#harry styles imagines#harry styles oneshot#harry styles fluff#dad!harry styles#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfiction#parkersroses writing#harry styles x reader
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"you're still blushing," x damon albarn
I haven't written something for damon in ages so here you all go <333
Pairing: 90s damon albarn x reader
Warnings: nothing :)
Word count: 2.214
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Having a roommate was always helpful for when you needed to cut the cost of rent, and to have company with someone that you got along with since you either were not far into relationships to be able to move in with a significant other, or you weren’t in a one - in which by having a roommate, made things less lonely. Me and Damon had known each other for quite some time now as Graham introduced us since Damon was looking for a flatmate at a time where, for some reason everybody seemed as though they were already occupied with people they were living with and sharing rent. Perhaps he was a little too late looking into it, but when Damon and I met, it was practically a match made in heaven. Though he wasn’t the first person I’d want to share a flat with, as I had no idea who he even was, just that he was best friends with somebody I was also friends with, he was perhaps, as oddly as it sounds, the best choice for a stranger to share a flat with. We had been living together since his band was working on their debut album, Leisure, and since then we had developed a very close relationship with one another. We both shared love for the same music, read the same books, and he had a personality which formed out of pure ardor and benevolence, which made it very easy to be able to form a strong bond together. It was very enjoyable living with him, as we wouldn’t avoid each other at all. Whenever both of us were present, there was nothing we would rather do than just spend time with one another. When nothing was going for us on weekends, we tended to just sit there on the couch in the living room, drinking warm, hot mugs of tea made by Damon at his advance, simply chatting about anything and everything. We would talk until the sun had gone down, until one of us had practically fallen asleep on the other, which was usually me, giving Damon the chore of putting me into bed, which I would constantly be thanking him for the following morning. At certain points in our friendship it was hard to distinguish whether we had feelings for each other, or if it was just a strong platonic relationship; other people had consistently pointed out our relationship together, and how we supposedly acted as if we were the happiest couple in the world.
After being asked whether me and him were together or not countless times, I had begun thinking about our relationship from an outsider's perspective, and over time I had realised that I was gaining feelings for Damon as I started to take notice of the little things that he would do. The warm smiles that he would give me; his plump, soft lips curving in a philanthropic manner, almost child-like, filled with pure love and adoration for you that you would instantly urge yourself to reciprocate. The unneeded care that would ensue once he realised that I was sick and needed a day off, bringing me a warm cup of tea in the morning, also mentioning that he wasn’t attending his band session later on in the day because I was his main priority, and that music could wait. The way he would rush into my room whilst I was organising my laundry, his lyric book gripped in his hand with a pen in the other, practically begging me to hear the new verse he had surprisingly conjured up in a couple of seconds - my opinion meaning so much to him that he would force me to read his finished songs, changing whatever I thought didn’t suit. And not to mention his features. His angelic, ocean-like orbs, where your eyes would get lost in them instantaneously; causing you to wonder what sort of resplendent alchemy went forth in creating such adoring pools of blue; his foolproof nose, sculpted in everlasting beauty, locked in the middle of his face, showing there was no flaw in his features, that he was the definition of true excellence, and though not a part of his face, the hair from his fringe that would coat over his forehead ever so softly, so elegantly, the strands, though roughly brushed through, looked as if they had been done professionally by his hairdresser. You were unable to pinpoint a flaw on him - he was the embodiment of elegance. You’d simply wonder whether this kind of beauty exists, and to have it living with me, was unequivocally something my heart was unable to handle.
Stepping into the flat that we both shared, I quickly took my shoes off before locking the door. As I wandered around the apartment, the aroma of smoke was easily identifiable, implying that Damon was inside, and smoking. Once I reached the living space, I saw Damon was sitting on the couch, flicking through the channels on the TV. “You alright?” I asked him, leaving the shopping bags on the countertops of the kitchen. He turned to look at me, a sweet smile painted on his lips before he took another drag from his cigarette. Oh, to be that cancer stick.
“I’m alright.” He replied, putting out his cigarette on the glass ashtray in front of him, then getting up to help me with the groceries. “How are you, love?”
“I’m okay. I managed to get everything we needed before we both died from starvation.” I laughed, folding up the now-empty bags that were once brimmed to the full of things we needed.
My gaze was fixed on him as he shut the fridge door as I leaned my tired body on the counter, him making his way after shutting the door to stand as close to me as he could. There was practically no empty space between us as he held me in an embrace, his face hidden into my neck as he played with strands of my hair gently. “I missed you,” He uttered, my heart now swelled in adoration for the man that was holding me, unaware if my body was able to handle more of his tauntings. Once he pulled out of the embrace, he clung onto my hands whilst staring deeply into my eyes. I couldn’t help but blush deeply as I looked into his eyes, getting lost in the essence of his handsomeness. I noticed his warm smile form into a cheeky grin as I realised that he knew I was going red. “You’re blushing.”
Slightly embarrassed, I scrunched my face together and looked down to the ground. There was no way out of it, one day he was going to find out just how much I had grown a liking for him. Instead of responding, I moved away from the situation and headed to sit on the couch, knowing that he would follow suit. Once we sat together, I grabbed the cigar pack that was left open on the table and put a cigarette between my lips, looking at Damon as a form of asking where the lighter was. He immediately grabbed the lighter from his pocket and pressed it, causing a flame to come out. I leaned closer to him to allow him to light the roll of tobacco, my eyes not daring to move away from the sight of the flame. I felt his eyes staring intently at my features, the tension in the air being more prominent than it had ever been before. When it was lit, I instantly inhaled, exhaling sharply to expose the smoke that had quickly built up in my throat.
“What did you do today, Dames?” I asked him, attempting to instigate a conversation. His eyes were still lingering on me whilst my eyes tried everything they could to avoid embarrassing myself again, with another blush.
“Well I went in to do some recording, today was mainly for Graham’s guitar solo so we finished up early,” he answered, walking to the fridge to grab himself a beer, then coming back to sit right next to me. “Graham tells me you’ve got a crush on someone.”
After almost choking on the smoke created in my lungs, I felt the blood rush to my cheeks yet again, the action moving so fast I could feel my cheeks begin to sting. “Ehm- He told you that?”
“So it’s true…” Damon began, placing his drink on the coffee table, a smirk evident on his features. “I thought he was lying, since we usually tell each other everything, but your face says otherwise.” He added, my heart panging slightly as I felt bad that he thought that I didn’t want to tell him. Oh if only he knew it was about him. If only he knew that what I haven’t been able to keep my mind off for weeks on end was him. If only he knew that he’s all that engulfs my mind.
“Who’s the guy?” He asked, as I felt his body shift ever so slightly closer to mine, wrapping an arm around my shoulder as he noticed my stiffness.
“You don’t know him.” I mumbled, staring down at my feet as I felt his breath fan my face slightly, the redness of my cheeks still prominent though I tried to ignore the heat radiating out of them.
“Describe him to me then.” He said, in a teasing manner. Part of me felt that Graham told Damon that it was him, and knowing Graham he probably would’ve done that since he was one of the many who believed that we would’ve been good together since we acted like it. But I wasn’t planning on jumping to any conclusions just yet.
“Uhh well…” I felt my cheeks heat up a bright red again as I looked in Damon’s direction, quickly snatching his beer off the coffee table and taking a sip of it to calm my nerves. “He’s got blond hair, blue eyes…” At this point I was staring deeply into Damon’s eyes, full-well knowing I was redder than ever, hell, I was a tomato. However, as I stared at him, I thought of all the possibilities and chances I would be able to mention to him that I developed feelings for him, and chances that would be handed to me easily. At most, I would probably be forced to go up to him and tell him myself that I liked him, which I had no courage in doing so in fear of absolute rejection. Though the fear of rejection still resonated in my mind deeply, there was definitely no way out of Damon and his questioning - he wanted to know everything, and he wanted to know it all now.
“Hmm… Sounds familiar,” he began, the smirk on his face not leaving any second. “Don’t suppose this crush has a name, does he?”
The next few seconds felt as if they had been stilled. Every single thought that I could have ever mustered in my mind joined themselves together, making my mind and body feel as if the moment we were living in was not real, at all. I felt breathless, ironic to the fact that I had been exhaling large clouds of smoke in the room, but I suppose even when breathing, you can still have your breath taken away from the sight before you. It felt as if I was in a haze, a drunken stupor, a lucid dream that felt far too realistic, but I had never thought that this moment would ever occur in mine and Damon’s time living together, or even in a child-like fantasy, or ever. Our faces were inches apart, my eyes constantly flicking through his bountiful orbs and smooth lips, his eyes fixated on mine, as if he was searching for something. Something to tell him that his suspicions were correct.
“It’s you for god’s sake.” I mumbled before eagerly conjoining my lips with his. I felt as if I rushed myself into it, the feeling enrapturing my mind, my body, and especially my heart. There was no other moment I had felt equated to this as our bodies embraced one another’s, the pair of us slowly allowing what was happening to melt into our minds. My heart was pounding as if my life had depended on it, my mind raced with thoughts so anxious but elated as both our bodies allowed our mouths to brush past one another’s until we were at a loss for breath. Love had never felt so strong, love had never carried this much emotion, this much integrity. I felt as if there was nothing else I had needed other than this moment to characterise its virtue, the intimacy shared overstimulated my emotions, for I felt like balling into tears at this juncture - not out of sadness, but out of pure admiration and alleviation that all this tension over the past couple months was real, that the love we had for each other was real, and not some fantasy that I invoked in my mind. Parting away from him, my eyes were fixated on his features - there was nobody else on this planet that could make me feel such emotion than him.
“You’re still blushing, love.”
#damon albarn x reader#damon albarn#blur#blur band#britpop#my writing#band imagines#90s#90s music#nineties#fluff
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