#dumb fuck shit

[dumbnotstupidfuck]

HOOOOMYGOD

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

i would say that, mentally speaking, i'm in a good place right now! physically of course, the crows continue their chanting,

[vonspe]

”I always choose my words carefully.”

[ahahnopenope]

here's the picture i couldn't get out of my head

[incredubious]

way to give a man a heart attack...

[saiintofawe]

you know what it's never too late for a third assassination attempt. they say three's the charm

[the-gnomish-bastard]

Some of you didn’t seem to understand how magic works in the sense of how you can access it. I’ll explain again.

If you gain magical power from making a deal with a more powerful being, you are a warlock. Sneaky lawyer.

If you gain magical power through teachings and studies, you are a wizard/artificer. (Artificers usually gain power through experimentation.)

If you gain magical power by pledging yourself to a cause, being, or idea, you are a paladin. Pretentious bitch.

If you gain magical power by praising a higher deity (and not making a deal), you are a cleric. Heal someone.

If you have magical power and you didn’t do anything to gain it, you are a sorcerer. Fuck you. Seriously, fuck you. The rest of us had to work for our shit.

If you gain magical power by protecting nature and caring for plants and animals, you are a Druid. Fucking hippie.

If you gain magical power from your desire to entertain and also fuck, you are a bard. Stop trying to seduce my dad.

[pinyatapix]

how i imagine Minecraft Alex's personality to be like vs how i imagine Minecraft Steve's personality. duality of minecraft

[curlytsunamiart]

murder

(lineart only ver.)

[dumbnotstupidfuck]

all of my top ships are the same dynamic

person a: dirtbag, annoying and/or would yell at you for breathing wrong, scares children, just a guy that everyone thinks sucks to be around

person b: the embodiment of beauty and charisma, anyone who doesn’t want to be them wants to fuck them, just the prettiest, most gentle person you’ve ever met

[captainmaxatx]

I think Deadpool and Wolverine 2 should start with them beating the shit out eachother in some nondescript field, just going full tilt completely mauling eachother

And then we see colossus come out the mansions back doors and he starts yelling about them ruining the lawn

[aliensfuckmeup]

You heard of cat Siffrin. What if it was cat Loop, and they were a huge dick?

Inspired by discord convo with @murkyskull

[cynicallyneutral]

「coward」

[rosemarytrash]

this is so needlessly chaotic but so is act 4 so really if you think about it i'm imbibing the spirit of it all into a lot of gaussian blurring

[xochimillilili]

Awwww puppy, just look at youu~ So fucking adorable how worked up you are honey, you like how good I feel inside? You like how I clench n squeeze your pretty cock inside me while I ride you baby?

Fuck your little puppy whines are so cute~ Such a good slut you are for me baby, letting me ride your cock, I'm so proud of youuu, taking your new toy like a good dog. You like my nails on your chest love? You like the scratches and bruises I'm leaving on you honey? Awwww good puppy~

See darling? I told you gettin a nice new toy for us would feel good. Both of us getting our fuck holes stretched out, taking all the slaps and pinches and scratches I give you like a good pup~

Awwww is it getting too much for you lil pup? Look at you... drooling and moaning while I fuck us, don't think I don't notice you staring at my leaking cock baby. Don't worry love, I'll keep fucking your ass with your new toy while stuffing your cute little cunt with my cum soon enough baby~

You're a good puppy after all~ And good pups like you deserve to be fucked and have all their little holes filled and stretched until you're just a cockdrunk fuzzy headed pet~

[the-gnomish-bastard]

You’re wanted for tax fraud. I’m wanted for flying a dragon into an archwizard’s tower during his 900th birthday, killing 47. We are not the same.