#wizard problems

[softandwigglybones]

*reblog for a more universal wizard tower*

Edit: it's supposed to say purposeless area,

[8ball-wizard]

ugh, i hate this, i'm gonna- *remembers that, even if i'm personally not affected by suicide jokes, i'm not the only one online and seeing them can be distressing for a number of reasons* send someone to the Infinite Spiders Dimension

[the-gnomish-bastard]

“The pen is mightier than the sword.” Bullshit. Never have I seen someone get killed by a pen, but I have seen people get decapitated by the sword. Also, when you say “The pen is” you’re spelling out “the penis” so you lose twice!

[theworldisadumpster]

Imagining Gale and Tara having a very civil, passive aggressive argument about why Tara should not be eating plastic

[wizard-of-defenestration]

Where to find hot single wizards?

Oh fuckith this be not Woogle (wizard google)

[potatoisasnake]

Apprentice mage felines for saddened wizards

Gaze upon the enchanted creatures

🧙‍♂️I dont own these images🧙‍♂️

[swagbatical]

*I flop bleeding into the tavern, weak and pathetic. Groaning like the damned*

Tavern patron: "You're half dead! What happened, were you robbed?"

Me wearily: "No. I was . . ."

I pause for a moment considering the possible future impacts that disclosing my new sport "exploding knife ball" to the public, while the idea is still in its' infancy could have on the longevity and adoption of it.

". . . Ambushed. By bears. Twelve of them. Conjoined twins. Full body ones. All of them. They knew martial arts. And had guns. Big ones. The really loud kind. I'm amazed you didn't hear it."

I sigh as I go limp like the wilting flowers upon autumn's dawn

[wizardmaxxing]

Next fucker in the council to steal my glitter I’m spawning 100 gooning gnomes in their room.

[brewerssupplies]

I, Valthrimbo, dark conjurer of the Ninth Gate, sorcerous master of the Chaos Realm, have suffered many fates worse than imprisonment in the Flayed Pits and much more tortuous than even the soul flames of Arg which burn away even the most resolute mind.

But nothing has been more taxing upon my mind or testing of my will than the AT&T Customer Support Line.

[malforius-ponderings]

Has this happened to you? 🤔🤔🤔

[mersinia]

Got work but hi wizard Tumblr. Again. With the tag list. Again. Jesus fuck I'm going to die with the amount of applications!

Quick note, this won't be finished before Halloween, this will take me more then 10 days, I already have to make the canvas bigger to fit everyone. But it will still be a Halloween party, so just imagine the picture took a while to be sent to you!

So, question, I now have part of the kitchen, I have a table with pumpkins and I have a fireplace with a rug, what else would you like to see happening?

And question number 2, since I have to do a canvas increase I can probably rework where everyone is, so let me know what you want to be doing as well! And with who!

Ready for the tag list? Haha, me neither, but here it is (now in alphabetical order)

@a-mushroom-wizard

@aileaxthevoidien

@aroace-wizard

@ashen-the-tiefling

@awizardsdisaster

@combustion-wizard

@draco-the-chaos-quetzal

@drew-bard-for-hire

@extra-ace-wizard

@f4y3w00d5

@forgettable-dumbass

@gnomishgimmy

@goblinchief

@greyhound-with-a-mega-wizard-hat

@gwblwbwlwbl

@irlactualwizard

@magical-bear-dubin

@monsterfucker-research-wizard

@panem-crustus

@profeshinul-wizurd

@ray-of-midnight-storm

@siley-the-wizard

@slutty-wizard-council

@slymewitch

@softandwigglybones

@terrencetheshark14

@thatgayforkcrow

@the-gnomest-bastard

@the-moth-wizard-of-mayhem

@the-shrimp-that-fried-rice

@username-not-registered

@verylegalwizard

@wizard-island-trading-co

@wizard-wylin-wylerian

@wizardothesea

If you see this and I forgot you, let me know!

[softandwigglybones]

Actually, wizards should be allowed to cast any spells they like

[8ball-wizard]

confession: a couple lives ago i went to a beach, got blotted out of my fucking gourd, and put a weird spell on some rocks so that they'd make people old.

[the-gnomish-bastard]

You’re wanted for tax fraud. I’m wanted for flying a dragon into an archwizard’s tower during his 900th birthday, killing 47. We are not the same.

[igorlevchenko-blog]

A word on Constant Effect Enchantments

We've had occasion before now to reflect how constant Illusion enchantments are detrimental to one's mental health. @theseventhoffrostfall has aptly dubbed it "the dunmer version of lead-based makeup" which also underscores how it became a kind of fashion statement, to cloak oneself in, say, cumulative Chameleon enchantments, in civil setting. The harmful effects of illusion magic ranges from insidious to truly devastating: as is the case with Sanctuary spell, shown to be the main driver of disassociative disorders—conditions that involve experiencing a loss of connection between thoughts, memories, feelings, surroundings, behavior and identity. Under these circumstances, one can imagine how even the lowliest Light spell—if made into a constant effect—would be further exasperating these symptoms.

Here I refer you to my monograph: "On pathology of indirect Light spells", Black Horse Courier Press, Imperial city.

While Reflect and Detect spells (of Mysticism school) may work towards eroding one's circumspection—the ethereality, the ghostliness of Sanctuary is an assault on faculties most fundamental.

So once again I ask you to call upon your local Council-members to vote on banning this magical mal-practice!

[primordialsoupvendor]

Hey man i’ve been supplying soup arcanum to some wizard businesses you wanna become a client

is your soup arcanum locally sourced and humanely slaughtered?