#do you know the reason why I stop here?
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Let's see some of what they have sacrificed (a whole chapter lol I'm almost crying no I'm crying so hard rn I won't shut up about it) for that 'I want to be his friend' (my ass) scene! (I'm only choosing my favorite)
So, only after both of og lloyd and suho were on the train, before og lloyd got reincarnated btw âşď¸ so we will see. What we were robbed just for half of chapter.
"Seriously? Are you still sulking?" Lloyd lifted his brow. "..." "What? Why? What? Don't look at me like that. Speak." "..." Ghost frontera didn't speak. But its gaze at Lloyd was distinctly different from a while ago. There wasn't anger, resentment, frustration, or any of the negative emotions that played across its eyes as it blewoff steam at Lloyd. The corners of Lloyd's lips rose slightly. "Hey, you're grateful but embarrassed for getting angry at me earlier, right?" "..." "I can see you flinching in guilt." "Oh, tsk... Come on." "If you're thankful, just say it. Don't curse me out."
And what's more funny is how suho cares for og lloyd lmao this is the proof that shows us how good person he is. And. You know. Yeah I'd rather not talking about how they portray his character out like that I cannot shut up.
"Hey, tell me if you feel motion sick." "Why?" "I'll remove the trap. That way, you can stick your head out and vomit." "I might as well just kick you out of the trap," growled Ghost Frontera. "Did you forget already how i beat you up after you tried to do that?" "No, I didn't, bastard," huffed Ghost Frontera. "Then let's just go reincarnate like a good boy. Anyway, how do you feel? What does it feel like to be the passenger of this monumental train?" "Well, nothing much." Ghost Frontera roughly scratched its jaw. "I want to get a drink. It's been a while."
Man...the more I write, the more sad I become when these good things are replaced with something. I don't know, you thought it was boring so you changed it? Even if it's just an unnecessary conversation but you know what? That allows readers to get to know the characters more. Get to know the character's attitude more. And can also relate more to that character...but...sigh. just. Sigh.
So I'm going to share my views on og lloyd right here. Tbh, he's a trash. Yes, he's inherently bad. And some people are just that bad no matter how good their family is. But if you try to analyze it through lloyd's pov on his home and his family. It's another kind. He finds his place boring and he is always dissatisfied with it. But with the little information we've gotten about what he was like when he was very young, and things he's noticed, even he considers them very boring. Of course, even though this bitch is a trash lol I never forgive him for what he had done (like-hate relationship for me and him lol)
Okay so. Hear me out. He did care for his family (*ahem* JAVIER EXCLUDED!!!!) but instead of changing himself he chose to let it be....yeah ykwimđ¤ˇââď¸ As I've said before, he cares about his family and he knows he shouldn't have done that in the first place. But he was not the one to even say it because he thought he would do it in his next life. What makes you think that he'll do whatever tf he does in the webcomic? Lmao let me grab your collar and have some private discussion!!!
"You're heartless bastard. Don't you miss your family back there?" "No. My parents all passed away." Ghost Frontera paused for second before saying, "They say your family is always with you as long as they're in your heart. Cheer up, scumbag." "What are you saying?" Lloyd frowned with a smile. "Forget it. What about my parents? Are they well?" "Of course. They are as healthy as a horse." "Really?" "Yeah." Lloyd stared at Frontera. Then he continued in honesty, "Come to think of it, I'm relaying this news late. The Frontera family is no longer a barony." "What? What do you mean?" "It's county now." "Whaaat?" Ghost Frontera's eyes windened. "Surprising, right? I'm surprised too. Anyway, the count has resumed his hobby recently too." "Wood carving?" "Uh-huh. There are a bunch of wooden sculptures in the study already." "Then what about Mother's garden?" "It's still there. Oh, it has doubled in size. But I'm slightly worried about the count's back and knees." "What's up with that old man's back and knees?" "He's helping out with the gardening. He insists on crouching and giving a hand when he's not used to the work." "Tsk. I guess the man is still senseless as always." "Aren't you going to ask about Julian?" "Don't have to. He's a smart kid, so I'm sure he's doing well on his own."
And ;) they replaced these precious conversation with that. Changed long ass heartwarming conversation into 3 speech bubbles just to sped up the story and ooc'd literally every characters. I'm so okay sir. I'm completely okay.
This is just a part of chapter 243 you know TT you know how much we were robbed right? I am okay right now. It's not like I'm going to talk about how they manage to portray my king hellkaros like that too. Yeah I'm to tally okay with it!
Anyway, it's true that og lloyd cares about his family but, dumbass. he hated javier so much you know lee hyunmin-nim you already have read ch 408 how the hell did you manage to understand that 'wow this guy is actually a good person maybe he even wanted to be friends with javier too!' How????????????? He cared for his family, yes. And javier was there too? No. He's scumbag? Obviously. So he's a good person? NO DUMBASS. LOOK WHAT HE HAVE DONE TO EVERYONE AND TELL ME HOW.
Or are you just not good at writing complex characters? lol Not even mentioning what he was reincarnated as...
Qidjwkwiduiqoq I'm ; ;;; arugh. qidjqkqodk okay sir. well done.
I'll draw og lloyd and suho conversation soon ^^ watch me draw what it supposed to be soon! Watch me!!!!!!!
Also, how the hell again did you think he cared for his estate may i ask some simple question.
#tged#tged spoiler#ch 243#God I love Hell arc so much that I cried#og lloyd frontera#lloyd frontera#kim suho#do you know the reason why I stop here?#you guys...it's better to read the whole arc yourself it's so good^^#i am not dragging myself to talk about hellkaros here or else i'll going insane#i don't care who tf is webcomic hellkaros is now i'm done#the only good webcomic hellkaros has is he's fucking dilf and hot grown ass man that's all#which is i don't even want to think that this mf is my gorgeous hellkaros ofc#i'm totally fine okay??#lol guys read the webnovel please!
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eleven is fascinating to me because he came right off the back of tens horrible traumatic breakdown after he lost everything and he immediately tried to establish himself as the opposite of that. he is funny and goofy and almost childlike, and he bulldozes on in his adventures with amy like nothing happened at all. but then something happens and his masks slips and it's like oh! the core of this man is still anger. he is so so angry all of the time and this façade is the only thing stopping him from being consumed by it. he isn't over any of it and he hasn't moved on. he is wearing a fez and laughing but under that all that exists is age old anger and grief and it is going to consume him
#i do think that this pit of anger was eventually covered and soothed by the ponds#but he didn't adress it and he couldn't even look at it until he was twelve#when he stopped pushing back and repressing everything and finally allowed himself to exist as he was#but ok listen#its all layed out in the first 3 episodes of season 5 and in the way amy sees him#episode 1. here is the new doctor he is energetic and reeling and fun#episode 2. the space whale comparison. here is the new doctor. he is unthinkably ancient and almost godlike but he is so so kind#and patient and good. he is ancient and lonely but he can't stand to see children cry. so the doctor helps people#episode 3. daleks. the doctor is a soldier. these are his age old enemies. he wants them dead and he will stop at nothing#all logic and reason vanish. he is hitting the dalek with a pipe and yelling his head off while amy watches in horror#like obviously we know why but amy didnt#this is not a sane or rational man he is unstable and angry#and in that episode he was stripped back to what he largely is: hate#you would make a good dalek ect ect ect#anyway 3 episodes with 3 very distinct and equally definitely traits layed out like: here you go#i don't like elevens era much but those first 3 episodes were great#doctor who#eleven#amy#eleventh doctor#matt smith#dr who#dw#i mean idk this is what river literally had to spell out for him#eleven was careening completely out of control#how long til doctor means warrior indeed?#mine
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redrawing my favorite gba chain of memories scenes with my own interpretations part 1(?):
âYouâre thinking about me⌠Youâre afraid of the darkness I command.â
#beep boop you want fries with that#kingdom hearts#riku#ansem#GBA CHAIN OF MEMORIES IS SO GOOD. please play it over the remake im begging. it also plays a lot better too.#every ansem scene is better in gba com because i dont have to listen to richard epcar attempt to be intimidating#they altered so many scenes in the remake and a lot of the changes suck !! just straight up !! i will never forgive them for changing#this scene and the previous lexaeus scenes. like why did they have riku get possessed for a second only for the next cutscene to#literally be about riku trying not to get possessed. like that makes no sense. its just cheap shock value and just treating lexaeus#like shit. at least he mentioned zexion. ok if i knew how to do rom hacks i could literally change the dialogue myself to mention zexion.#ok sorry for complaining. uhhh#the composition is clearly ripped off from the owl house. sorry. season 1 belos scene.#and the background is just the original gba bg of the scene but blurred to look less pixelated#sorry the anatomy sucks. i know rikus arms shouldnt be that long but too late. kms.#this scene is so good because augh. this is the first time in this game we come face to face with the real ansem. not just diz pretending#to be him to just shove down âdarkness badâ down his throat. this is why mickey comes to save him in this scene. because riku is in#real danger here. thats also the reason why mickey sends his power again when riku is being dangled like a puppet BECAUSE ANSEM WAS THERE#FOR REAL THIS TIME. anyway yeah i know ansemâs sprite doesnât appear when he says that but the portrait is a silhouette so i went#weh. why not !!#anyway im obsessed w/ cryptid ansem. ghost inhabitanting a fallen kingdom. continuing the fucked up experiments like if they never stopped#OK IVE ALREADY RAMBLED ENOUGH AND THIS SHIT IS GOING INTO RE:KH TERRITORY. (hunter voice) BYEEEEEEE
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I'm sorry, I've been trying so hard to accept Izuku becoming a UA teacher but I just can't. I love Horikoshi for the happiness he and his story have brought me over the years, but Izuku being a teacher is just bugging me so hard. I know he'd be an incredible teacher, I'm not arguing against that. But beyond the fact that I think Izuku himself would want to at least stay in the hero industry, I don't think there's any chance Katsuki would've let him give up on being a hero.
I think that's why Horikoshi at least made it a point in canon to emphasize that Katsuki especially was behind funding Izuku's hero suit. Because he of all people could not let Deku go. He needed him to be a hero. And I appreciate that we at least see that much in canon. But honestly I think Katsuki would've stepped in sooner than 8 years later and never would have let Izuku give up on being a hero in the first place.
I don't know at what point Izuku gave up on being a pro hero and started looking at other career options, but whenever it happened, I just know he must have spoken to Katsuki about it. Izuku, unreliable narrator that he is, probably fooled even himself into thinking that he's okay with it. That he's blessed to have lived his dream as long as he did. That his time is over. But Katsuki would've shut that shit right down.
Kacchan Bakugou did not watch Izuku spend 10+ years wanting nothing more than to be a hero, while quirkless, just to then watch him give up on being a hero because he lost his quirk. He would've called bullshit on that immediately.
Katsuki knows Izuku intimately. He knows how badly Izuku needs to be a hero. Being quirkless never stopped Izuku from wanting to be a hero before. There's no reason it should stop him now. And he'd say as much. Ain't no way he'd let Izuku give up on being a hero just because he lost OFA.
#bnha manga spoilers#bakudeku#bkdk#bnha 430#Get out those fucking notebooks of yoursâ Izuku. I know you have plenty of shit written down about support items for a quirkless hero.#katsuki has seen Izuku be quirkless and still want to be a hero so he knows something's wrong here#why doesn't he want to be a hero anymore? what's stopping him?#is there guilt at play here? something to do with not being able to save shigaraki?#or did Izuku become so attached to OFA that he doesn't know who he is without it anymore? doesn't think he can be a hero without it?#he needs Katsuki to remind him of who he was before OFA. of the quirkless boy who wanted to be a hero.#i think what's bugging me so much is that izuku had never shown any interest in being a teacher#if he had wanted to be a teacher since before the war then yesâ I'd be happy for him and so so proud#good on him for deciding that he wants to help shape the next generation through teaching and whatnot.#maybe he realized that he can inspire others through ways not involving beating villains and stuff#but you cannot tell me he wouldve ended up a teacher had he kept OFA#the only reason he became a teacher is because he lost OFA. he never would've done it otherwise. he would've become a pro hero#that's why it feels like a loss to me. because it's a back up plan. not his true goal.
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Just to minimize my chances of being genuinely misunderstood OR deliberately misinterpreted, and crucified for something I don't think, How Dare You Say We Piss on the Poor website etc...I'm gonna say this right up top. I absolutely understand why people don't like Thessaly as a character, if anyone does completely unironically stan her as some kind of feminist hero who Did Nothing Wrong uwu, I personally see it as a bit of a red flag. I don't like terfs real or fictional. In a vacuum, I could even completely sympathize and agree with the people who want her cut.
HOWEVER.
It's really something to me to see people clamoring for her to be cut, because she carries and expressed an ugly indefensible prejudice (transphobia) in words towards (1) person. Meanwhile Hob fucking Gadling enacted one of the most violent forms of antiblack racism I can even think of against thousands no, millions of people, the ripple effects of which still affect billions more today. Just a little light idk, profiting off the fucking slave trade and had to be told by someone else that it was bad...and he's a fan favorite.
People are saying Thessally being Dream's love interest reflects badly on him or is somehow endorsement by the narrative (?!?!?!?!?!? Didn't she (SPOILER ALERT AS IF IT MATTERS BY NOW) help participate in his extended assisted suicide? She's not painted as a great person to me just another character what are y'all SMOKING whatever fine. It's fine this is fine.) But shipping Dream with Mr. Former Slaver is not only not verboten or frowned on widely in the fandom but its THEE most popular pairing by far. So...why the difference?
Like where are the same fans who are saying Thessaly shouldn't just be more clearly shown to be wrong, she shouldn't even be in the show at all when it comes to Hobert's crimes??? Yes, transphobia is indefensible. Isn't racism?
And I hear the cries of "it's fiction!!!" Already rallying (if anyone who needs to hear this even sees it lol) to which I say:
HORSESHIT. I KNOW you don't, deep down, really agree because if you did, why get upset about Thessaly being included??? Why does what she said to one person matter if it's Just Fiction You Guyze. Fictional characters are allowed to do bad things and fiction isn't reality sweaty....except when you only apply that standard to fictional racists you like and simp for, but fictional transphobes you don't are SO HARMFUL they shouldn't even be portrayed in fiction.
Like. Give me a big fat BREAK. This looks like bullshit, no? I'm sorry, but I'd love for someone to try and give any other explanation besides one personally offended you or hit home for you, and the other doesn't.
And if that bothers you or you feel like it says something negative about you...idk what you want me to say??? You can't control how other people perceive you and that's how people outside this majority-of-the-fandom bubble see it. You don't need to respond, I just wish and genuinely hope this gives you a moment to think about why fans who ARE bothered by both (and not just paying lip service to being bothered by the one but railing against the other) are so frustrated with people saying everyone is welcome but in practice only bending over backwards for the comfort and emotions of themselves, and people they can easily relate to.
You don't have to like Thessaly (I don't. I find her an interesting antagonist, I don't stan her. And frankly imo likability is not. the point of her character) but you'll pardon me for feeling more than a bit cynical and side eying people's motivations for what seems a...pretty obvious double standard, on what fictional crimes related to real world issues matter to y'all, and which clearly don't. Either actually bring the same energy to the table for fictional people who committed atrocities, even if against a group you're not part of and thus don't feel the need to empathize with, or just carry on, but accept that you don't have the SLIGHTEST room to talk about cutting characters who do immoral things. And you also need to accept that you look like a hypocrite when you do.
#thessaly#wanda the sandman#hob gadling#fandom racism#I could've cried sexism!!! Problematic Male vs Female Characters except 1) I don't actually think that's the main reason *here*#2) there are WAY better examples of that particular double standard in this fandom#also i can admit when I'm a bit of a hypocrite or was.#i used to dip my toes into the dreamling stuff too early on#but idk. It just got too sour seeing ppl whitewash (lol I know I'm a comedian)#what he did over and over. And I genuinely had started to wonder#if the show hadn't included that particular crime and I'd just imagined it from the comics because#my memory is shit sometimes and I guess I was naive. I *wanted* to believe someone would talk aboutit#if it had made it in. but ultimately i went back and checked and no#and seeing how the whole fandom behaving affected my non-white mutuals some of whom...#like these are my friends man or ppl I just respect and I can't just. Ignore their feelings and their pov#and act like they werent making points or it doesn't matter#like it's all just fun and games for everyone on the same terms. And seeing how easy it was#for everyone to ignore was so unsettling. I couldn't keep pretending it was just fiction and didn't affect anyone real#Call me a bully a t3rf apologist (fuck you and for the record. no)#a puritan or a Fancop (actually stop comparing#people disagreeing with you online to what cops do. For fucks sake you just make it look like nothing is really real to you outside fandom)#whatever man. Whatever helps you sleep. I'm just gonna block you#if you're clearly sticking your fingers in your ears. engaging with you is a waste of time and energy then#Hell I have sympathy for anyone who doesn't like thessaly#especially trans fans. Especially rn. But lbr that sympathy for a lot of the white trans/queer fans only goes one way!!!#never gets extended to anyone else's issues. Like THATSthe issue. And it's shitty!#(sorry this post is not about me in the confessional lol that's why I put this at the bottom#I just had feelings to get out and yes its my blog but i didn't want to clog the airways)
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The parallel between Sokka and Tenzin as their fathers' sons.
Sokka, left at 13 as his father and all the other men head off to war. Hakoda tells him "being a man is knowing where he's needed the most" and he needs to protect his sister, his home.
Tenzin is the second airbender. He is also half water tribe, he's a man. When Aang dies, he will be the last airbender. He understands what he needs to do.
Untold amount of pressure and responsibility have been thrust upon them by their fathers. Though, I believe it is not all intentional, but the unfortunate circumstance of being the fathers of sons who take responsibility incredibly seriously.
In Sokka's case, "protect your sister" is a vague instruction. It was meant to give him purpose, to help him feel okay about being left behind, He is too young for war, his father does not want to bring his child to slaughter. But Sokka will die with purpose. He will train the children of his tribe so they will be protected, he will face a fire nation ship until his last breath. He cannot go to war, but Hakoda did not see that war was all around them. In trying to give Sokka purpose, Hakoda put their world on his shoulders.
We do not get to see Aang be a father (in the TV shows), but we know he had hopes for the future. All his children were air nomads, and the air acolytes brought his culture back, but Tenzin could bend. This part of their culture is one ONLY they share. I do not think Aang would hide this, he is joyous that he gets to share his culture. When he feels respected, he always is, he taught the air acolytes after all. Off handedly, he could say, "I'm hopeful for a future where there are lots more air benders," and that, which feels mostly innocuous to him, is the nail in the coffin of Tenzin's fate. He is Avatar Aang's son, and the future of the air benders. It would not matter that Aang meant a future in generations. Tenzin sees the responsibility and it's his. He is his father's only air bending child, he knows what he needs to do.
Being a parent is not understanding the way the things you say harm your children. Even those things that feel innocuous in the moment can be life altering. Especially the more the child respects the parent. Purpose and Hope for those with a broader perspective, can be death sentences to a life that could have been when expressed to those who idolize the former.
#avatar the last airbender#avatar the legend of korra#atla sokka#sokka#tenzin#lok tenzin#aang#avatar aang#hakoda#atla#conspiracy lvl: text#i thought about talking about how my own mothers expectations for me broke me#they just felt like facts of life for her#just as like anecdotal evidence for my thought process#bc like we only know aang as a father from his frustrated adult children#but i REALLY REALLY dislike the takes that are like 'aang kept having kids until he got an airbender'#bc THAT doesnt feel like aang#like#if that were the case dont you think aang and katara would have had like A LOT more kids????#like if the goal was make airbender babies why stop at one???#but its because bumi kya and tenzin are reflections of sokka katara and aang#ive made a post about that#its about AANGS FAMILY#and he loves them#i think the favoritism is reasonable#makes me sad but thats cause my mom had obvious favorites (it wasnt me lmao)#another reason why i didnt wanna bring her up <- is doing it anyway how embarrassing#i ALSO thought about my dad though#but i cant talk about that here bc APPARENTLY tumblr only lets you add 30 tags now rip
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so has anyone figured out WHY there is the Need To Share our Artworks⢠or is it just the vibes and our Soul apparently
#ive been running on âtwo cakes. u aren't BOTHERING people by putting art on their feed they can scroll past it/if they dont they get âcakeââ#and we love âcakeâ#âcakeâ is picture on the internet in this case#like okay the contracts and transaction format is a me problem!! i need to get rid of the âutilitarian brain wormsâ bc they're boring#this is supposed to be a hobby and the âget a good grade in hobbyâ wolf in the brain is just crying bc that's how they understand the world#the âget a good grade in xâ wolf has valid pain but needs to stop controlling my life because they don't need to earn âenough value to liveâ#ect ect ect#and the life of minmaxxed utility is a life of trying to appeal to a âcorrectâ that doesn't exist yaddi yadda = boring#i love you wolf. also shut up. affectionate. concerned. you get it#ok so we remove tangible purpose from act of experience art because THAT'S not âthe pointâ#because âthe pointâ is the joy killer eccetera ecc#but then what? âhere check out this labor of love. i drew this fucker 15 times. no there's no story* there it's just a guyâ#*story in this case being an emotional engagement/a situation/a context in which to ponder/other#so it's just a Draw. no further analysis. what do others Get from that?#i know i deeply enjoy art because im a fan of the process of People Making Stuff. i love when there was nothing but now there's something!!!#THAT'S what's it all about!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to me!!!! right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#so it stands to reason that creation is purpose enough?? to be experienced???? to be known????????#idk!!#this is a nothing burger of a thought people have always liked picture on the internet stfu maiora there doesn't need to be a reason#this is just the brainworms talking!!! because god forbid âsomething not have a purposeâ??? blegh!!!!!!!!#sounds like unhealthy rationalizing instead of letting things be out of The Fearâ˘!!sounds like depraving urself from joy bc of BRAINWORMS!!!#so like!!!!! picture on the internet doesn't NEED inherent value. creation is enough!! (plus there's the Attachment to Character. also.)#but then why are YOU *points at you* here? gen q!!#i made an image you like and now you are reading my word babble in some tags!!! what's THAT all about???????????#it's INTERESTING!! do you see what im trying to get at??#is it empathy??? person made something other saw something other made- other2other connection???? intrigue????????#.......all this is probably explained in some book or yt essay somewhere. oh well.#in the meantime thank you for your time! we can pretend we were stuck in an elevator together and then i started rambling#i hope you have a great rest of your day thanks for stopping by!! <3#maiora garrulates
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I thought you kin kdj?
anon i hope this is a joke cause if this is a genuine question it is the singlemost scathing read i have ever recieved in my life đ bravo
#I WANT YOU TO KNOW IM LAUGHING THIS IS FUNNY REGARDLESS OF WHATEHR UR SERIOUS#not laughing At You tbc just the situation generally. genuinely not mad fhdkfdk#to answer ur question: no i dont bc i stopped kinning a bit before reading orv so the stars did not align#i think the me from when i used to kin definitely wouldve tho if thats any consolation#but yeah everyone i AM being truthful whenever i say i dont kin kdj#its just REALLY funny how much overlap there happens to be thats all#THIS HAS SURPASSED THE PERSON WHO TAGGED MY POST THINKING I WAS A KDJ ROLEPLAYER BTW. WHICH IS A HIGH BAR#inbox#EDIT: FRIEND HAS JUST NOTIFIED ME THERES A POST ON HERE WHERE I SAID I DID IN FACT KIN KDJ??? I DO NOT REMEMBER THIS. GENUINELY.#ANON YOU ARE JUSTIFIED SORRY FOR THE CONFUSION I HAVE DISSOCIATION AND MEMORY ISSUES LMAO??? whoever made that post was wilding#me the one typing this has no memories of kinning kdj so uh. SHRUG??? i wasnt lying on purpose at least#.....DO YOU SEE WHY THERES OVERLAP. THERES A REASON THE NUMBER 49 HAUNTS ME#edit2/update: they apparently distinctly remember me saying it in the tags of a post but nEITHER OF US CAN FIND IT#what is happening...hello....is anyone out there....#*knocks on my own skull* hello?? anyone home?! WHO DID THIS đ¤Łđ#EDIT/UPDATE 3: I FUCKING FOUND IT its from nearly 4 years ago holy shit#still dont remember posting that at all
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I will never make this because it would be for an audience of one (me) but ever since reading "If we Were Villains" (story about serious drama kids in college who perform shakespeare and deal with a murder) I have been entertaining the thought of a crack fic crossover with High School Musical The Musical The Series where the staff decides they will no longer put on shakespeare after the tragic accident that happened at Thanksgiving, because Shakespeare plays would only increase the tension and drama. So they hire Ms. Jen who decides their spring play will actually be High School Musical (which exists in the 90s in this universe) and it ruins the vibe so much that everyone gives up on being dark and mysterious because they're universally pissed at Ms Jen for making them learn choreoraphed basketball dancing.
#if we were villains is actually genuinely good and has actual literary worth and pulls from shakespeare in an intelligent meaningful way#but unfortunately all i can do is comedy so this is the only fan content i have to offer :(#THE THING IS iwwv is just hsmtmts if it hsmtmts was good and also they committed crimes#they utilize the same parallel of casting choices with real life drama which I love#umm so casting: Meredith would be Sharpay Obvi. I think it would be really funny if James was cast as Ryan bc they hate eachother and would#have to pretend to be siblings working together. And I think ashley tisdale and Lucas Gabreel actually didn't get along when filming#also i love the thought of Ms Jen looking at James and going âi know what you areâ#HOWEVER it would be more interesting if james was Chad to Oliver's Troy (which is really just reversing their Romeo and Juliet moment)#bc chad is like nooo don't do theater... stick with me and do basketball... but it would be Coded Subtextually#Unfortunately Wren would be typecast as Gabriella and I don't think that would cause drama bc I don't believe James actually liked her!#I think it was comp het bc she was very sweet and nonthreatening as opposed to Meredith's big flirting energy so she would be a âsafeâ crus#lets lean into that actually. this gives Wren a chance to have a personality (bc I enjoy this book but it is not good at fleshing out women#So oliver and Wren spend more time together and kind of talk about James a little and Wren is like yeah James is very sweet#and I like him but it feels so hard to get him to feel comfortable with me... i guess he's just closed off and doesn't talk much#we also get to see more of her personality and interests maybe she's like I relate to gabriella because I also like to Read :) feminism#and oliver is like Hmm That Is Not My Experience With Him perhaps our bond is deeper and James does like me Hm#And then Meredith can flirt with him as Sharpay and James gets pissed and in character gets very intense about how Troy can't join THEATER#that's why he's upset and sad bc sharpay represents theater and only that reason and nothing else and he isn't in love with oliver At All#Alexander can be Ryan now since James is Chad (and he's also Gay) and Filippa can be Kenzie bc they're both queer coded#Anyway at rehearsal one day Meredith and James and Oliver are having their fighting over troy moment and then Meredith stops and is like#wait guys. This musical is so freaking stupid. why are we even doing this#and their mutual frustration at their art being turned into a farce is enough to bond them together and they're like#we need to focus on our REAL enemy: ms Jen#and then they hatch a scheme and it's probably like. They dump a bucket of fake blood on her at opening night a la carrie#and then put on their own rebellious production... it still has to be a musical because i like musicals#families with children are in the audience and they're like OK FOLKS! HERE'S ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW!#if we were villains#iwwv#hsmtmts#high school musical the musical the series
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sorry for making yet another textpost but i came across that post saying they dislike transfem natsume because he "canonically hates being perceived as a girl and tries to erase all sorts of memories related to that" and also went on to shame genderbends of him aswell. So, as someone who not only draws genderbends of natsume but is myself someone who is nonbinary and hates being perceived as a woman, i thought id offer my two cents
first of all; i think its important to note that natsume does NOT hate his childhood. in fact, hes quite happy that he had such an unusual upbringing!
what natsume hates is being perceived as weak. thats why he was raised as a girl after all, it was his mother trying to protect him from evil spirits. he doesnt hate the whole "-chan" or "wearing dresses" thing because he has a hatred for womanhood, its because due to his upbringing hes now come to associate those things as being weak. he begs tsumugi to forget about it because that means tsumugi remembers natsume being weak, and natsume thinks tsumugi still referring to him as "natsume-chan" means he still sees natsume as weak. (iirc natsume did however once say that he is a little sad that he doesnt really know how to relate to young boys due to this in poltergeist, but i couldnt find the exact quote. either way that just adds to the complexity of natsumes relationship with his childhood, because while he is happy to be "abnormal" in that sense, it has left him lacking in some areas)
i have to ask though, should this conflict of his not be something we hope he overcomes? should we not want him to develop a healthy relationship with various gender expressions? should we not want natsume to overcome his belief that feminine things = weakness? i want natsume to reach a point where he can wear feminine clothing and not feel like some damsel in distress because of it. i want natsumes character to grow. i want him to develop a positive relationship with his gender because natsume DOES enjoy some more typically feminine things, like baking! he used to bake with his mom when he was little! and i want him to feel like he can indulge in that side of him without feeling insecure.....
i LOVE transmasc natsume, my primary hc for him is transmasc nonbinary after all, but with all these things considered, shouldnt people be allowed to headcanon him however they want? if they hear his story and negative relationship with femininity and how that resonates with them and they themselves are transfem, should they not be allowed to hc him as such too?
which brings me to my next point; my own personal relationship with gender and femininity. i was raised as a girl and i fucking DESPISED womanhood. i hated everything about it. i hated how i felt forced into a box i didnt want to be stuck in, and i hated how it felt like my whole life had already been planned out for me due to societal expectations, aswell as me needing to present a certain way. i was peak "tomboy" growing up, constantly wearing super baggy clothes and wouldnt even brush my hair alot of the time. but despite that i remained miserable. i frankly hated how i looked and would constantly dye my hair vibrant colors in an attempt to make me like myself a little more. it wasnt until i realized "wow, im actually not a girl at all" that i finally let go of believing i needed to look a certain way (and thus, defying it) and started to dress for myself. i started to dress in clothes that made me happy and feel pretty! alot of which leans feminine, but clothes doesnt have a gender, and how you dress doesnt define your gender either, but it can still be a bit scary yknow? especially since i dont want people to think of me as a girl, and drawing a bunch of femstars has really made me learn to love myself more in a funny way. i can put these characters in clothes i think are beautiful, i can explore the more feminine parts of me that i adore but dont want to express in public due to how i want others to perceive me, but it has also warmed me up to femininity even more. because femstars to me feels detached from the expectations of society because its not a real thing!! there are no canon femstars designs!!! i can do literally whatever the hell i want with it and its been so liberating to me!!
all this to say; i think it really sucks seeing the way this fandom treats transfem hcs and explicit genderbends, because like ive said before; they can truly be something so personal. you dont know why that person is drawing what theyre drawing, so its a little unwise to make assumptions based on ........ Well, whatever it may be. i know very well that women dressing the way society expects them to SUCKS, esp if you have personal ties to it, but you have to realize the issue isnt femininity, but misogyny.
#maybe ill delete this later idk but i just felt like i needed to say something#as i constantly see these things being spoken of yet never do these people actually reach out to femstarries#and ask Hey why are you doing this?#so instead they make bad faith assumptions and it really sucks.#and while im here;#trans hcs count as genderbends. Because you have changed the characters gender#*IF the org chara is a cisman and you make them a trans woman i should add#once again Stop treating trans and cis people as two separate things#if it was a cisbend itd be CALLED CISBEND#and the reason i tag genderbend is because i know some people dont like it#and thats valid!!! no one is forced to like this kind of stuff!!!#and some people who dont like genderbends might be new to enstars and dont know what femstars is#so should it not still be tagged for those people too?#should we not look out for the trans people who dont wish to see their favs be a different gender???#i dont get it. i really dont#this post probably wont even reach the right audience but wtv#nat rambles#nats enst posting
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you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.
i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.
#every time i try to reach out or talk to someone it goes nowhere. i dont have any social skills anymore and have no clue how to keep a#conversation going. half the time even when i do people stop replying to me. which is fine theydont owe me a reply but still feels likeshit#when i tried to make one new irl friend it just didn't work because they have better options for friends. we spoke occasionally but never#messaged online like ever and would only talk when we happened to be in the same place. i tried multiple times to organize a time to hangou#none of which came to pass. i dont understand why this one didn't work because i thought this person was interested in being my friend but#i guess i was wrong or thought they were more interested than they really were.#i have a problem with reaching out anyway which has been a problem i have had since i was like 11. reaching out to people first doesnt come#easily to me - in the beginning when i was a lot younger i didn't want to bother people with my presence & thought if i were to come to#someone first they would feel pressured into talking to me when they didn't want to. this is stupid of course. but has still not left me as#something i feel is very core to the way i act today. waiting for someone to come to me first feels like my only option because i do not#know how to reach out effectively (my evidence being i have failed every time i have tried) & i am convinced people dont like me in the#first place and do not want me to approach them.#i dont really even know who to reach out to in the first place. my world is extremely narrow. the number of people i know has shrunk#significantly and my standing in their eyes collectively has also shrunk significantly in the past few years. i feel like every person i#was once friends with wants nothing to do with me. i feel as if i have burned every bridge possible.#when it comes to the fact i complain all the time . which i know of course is annoying. its because i cant find any kind of joy in anything#i do or see or whatever. nothing makes me happy - i only see things to complain about. all stimulus seems grating and the world seems#specifically catered to make me miserable. all i can really do is complain. i treat this blog like a stream of consciousness and when most#of that consciousness is occupied with how much i hate being alive the blog will mostly be complaining. its a vicious cycle lol .#anyway . i guess the key theme is low self esteem begets low self esteem in many ways. mental illness begets mental illness.#i am not really saying this to anyone least of all to you anon. i just felt compelled to recount i guess for myself the reasons that came#to mind for why i am like this. i am talking to myself here
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#primal kyogre#is that what i should tag this as?? or should i say like⌠mega kyogre? i. um. i'm gonna leave it as primal for now. and just hope#that's right. anyway you know how this guy glows?? yeah it's baked into the textures on their model i guess. they just do that#all the time. and they cannot stop glowing. because they just Look Like That. for some reason. can't say it's a flattering look#especially with those teefers being barely fuckin visible. and the eyes being kinda washed out. it looks much better in game than here#but then again i played omegaruby as a kid. as opposed to alpha sapphire. so i never saw this i don't think#though i guess i think it might've happened in rtdx? for their boss fight there? not sure#i did that one waiting for my food at a steak 'n shake. that boss fight. i dunno why i remember that so specifically but that's. what i did
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hey man. i'm just saying. why would we put inexperienced teenagers with over-inflated egos and obvious emotional issues into combat classes and make them claw their way to the top of their dorms and expect things to just run smoothly. who actually thought this
#the reason rsa doesn't have overblots is because they understand the joy and whimsy of life and friendship btw#LIKE. why is there no school counselor?? do you know how much time & resources & effort & TRAUMA we could have saved the students &#school from if ANYONE had reached out to riddle and was like 'hey are you alright i heard xyz and i wanted to let you know...' ESPECIALLY#since TREY LITERALLY TELLS US 'oh well here's the lowdown on her trauma this is Probably what is causing this'#or if someone sat down to tell leona 'hey! i'm rooting for you in ur magift(?) game! you're my fav player!!' AND LET HIM FEEL NOTICED#or if someone approached azul as an Equal to try to stop his plans. as a friend even. BEYOND A BUSINESS TRANSACTION#or if ANYBODY BUT ESPECIALLY KALIM was like 'jamil i think you should follow your passions and do something you enjoy today!!' or AT LEAST#let him know he was appreciated as a person NOT JUST FOR HIS WORK#'i know you're doing a lot today but i just wanted to thank you for how much Effort you put into this and..' etc etc etc#ERM.. IF ANYONE TREATED VIL LIKE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CELEBRITY??? or even 'hey i loved you in this film i was wondering if we could#do a play together or something..!!' AND LET HER TRY A TYPE OF CHARACTER SHE NEVER GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE. and sing her praises.#if anyone reached out to idia beyond a 'hey the teacher said to come to class'/'get out of your bed and come to our housewarden meeting'#or even. IF ORTHO HIMSELF was like. 'you know it's not your fault... you didn't cause all of this. not really' OR SOMETHING#or if malleus ever got to experience a small firsthand loss AND WAS COMFORTED THROUGH IT. not just quick fix via magic. not replacing. just#GRIEVING SOMETHING??????? and wasn't feared by literally everyone#um. maybe the real twisted part is that all of this tragedy was easily preventable if we had a support system in place.#but idk. twst is a highschool. there's no support in real high school either. i'd probably overblot too if i could ajdjrjfinfdndjd#twst#chatter#LONG RAMBLE SORRY#yes overblots are essential to the plot. but also. do you know how frustrating it is watching the blot build up and sitting in silence.#I'M SORRY IK IF SOMETHING LIKE THIS WAS HAPPENING TO A GUY I JUST MET I WOULD PROBABLY NOT NOTICE.. but of it was my Friend or Housewarden..#I'D ASK BRO.... I'D ASK ... UGHHHHHUUUHHHH#not that anyone would notice if *I* was about to lose it tbh#speaks volumes about our society o think#OKAY NOW I'M DONE FOR REAL
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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.
Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.
#my characters#waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit#deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee#and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name#deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c#man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while#he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair#ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so#its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons#but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me#and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not#fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew#and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable#while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts#and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed#so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en#so you know maybe its that idk#and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now#and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it#and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad#that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal#and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it#the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer#anyway story time in the tags again#im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note#its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him#he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times#and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea#and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you
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sorry if you've already mentioned but what (re?)ignited your love of comics/x-men/cherik? curious because there are so many different adaptations of them
i think im gonna speak for a few (or a lot of) people when i say that TL;DR the wolverine x deadpool movie that came out this summer is what pulled me back into comics and i COULD leave it there but i will go into excruciating and unnecessary detail instead because i love an origin story and i love oversharing.
under the cut tho because im nice sometimes (there's also wxdp doodles in here. if you want to see that)
ironically (and probably commonly), growing up i was more of an avengers kid. Kinda. Loosely <- binge watched the cartoons and movies and read copious amounts of comics and fics and i am hoarding fanart in my old dresser as we speak ok 'loosely' is a modest lie.
embarrassingly i remember getting into discus cause of captain america LMAO so yeah needless to say i was a Humble Fan- me joining my school's comic class/club didnt help either (shoutout to my teach from that she was the realest one out there for. A Multitude of reasons). she definitely is was inspires me to even draw still and make comics and i often think bout the tips i learned from her class tbh she was great
back to the movies t and comics tho, i got into em because my brother would offer to take me and that's how we'd hang out (i rarely saw movies in theaters and i even more rarely went anywhere as a teenager. still kinda like that today tbh ooops) and yk. it just snowballed after that.
my brother and i have always liked comics- he just more than me for a while (though he still very much loves comics and As We Know From My Posts we still talk about them whenever i see him To An Exhausting Degree)
durin then i was really into stony and i have a few surviving doodles i made but those are between me and god. and anyone who asks tbh LOL
'snap can you make this related to x-men again this is long' ok so fast forward to This Summer again I Still Don't Really See Movies but my brother offered to take me and this was the first time i'd actually seen an x-men movie in full
as a kid i only remember seeing the 'perfection' scene between erik and raven in first class while i was channel surfing. pretty sure i changed the channel after seeing mystique naked cause i was scared my parents would get mad at me if they caught me watching it LOL
BUT MOVING ON As A Kid i think it's also natural you'll sometimes watch 92 if it's on And I Did though evidently it didn't stick too hard (i do remember really liking beast and gambit though.... still do really): my knowledge of x-men was. INCREDIBLY sparse. like diabolically so so i didnt have too much expectations (aside from the fact i vaguely liked deadpool beforehand).
tbh i dont know why my bro never took me to see any of the x-men movies. it's not like he doesn't Also like x-men (90% sure nightcrawler's his favorite but my brother will be caught dead saying he has absolute favorites like that)- he owns a bitch load of deadpool comics/omnibus sets too (of which ive read over the years and reread this year) but Shrug moving on
Much Like Most Of The Internet i fell down the rabbit hole that way. i have some doodles i made a couple days after seeing WxDP that i now have an excuse to throw at all of you Look And Perceive
and so. As I Do. i got curious and told myself i'd binge watch all the x-men movies the week before i went back to school And Then I Did ft. My Brother Sometimes and then i said i'd binge watch all of '92 and And I Did That ft. My Brother Sometimes But Less So and now we're here. currently watching Evolution...
once i got to school i realized i lived near a comic shop and started getting into the comics that way (the first ones i got since going down this rabbit hole was Magneto Was Right!, The Resurrection of Magneto, and The Trial of Magneto. if you were curious !!!!! clearly i didnt care too much about context i just needed to see My Guy jelvejlkvj i have no regrets and Evidently ive read more since)
i'm pretty sure what dragged me into cherik specifically was the fact i saw a clip of The Famous ending to 92 where erik's aghast at the notion jean even has to question his love for charles. i think that was what officially had me refocus my lens on them: not a single poolverine thought after that LOL (all the cherik posting i saw on twitter definitely helped too but that was the nail in the coffin for any other interests i had: i was locked into cherik and x-men in general now)
that clip specifically, i was surprised at the fact they- frequently even- have the x-men franchise say erik loves charles and vice versa so bluntly. even if it's not meant to be romantic, i fear im just a fan of how casually the word's thrown around with them two and i got tender bout it all. Then Yk. i just live for the drama. the hilarity even. the sincerity .... they make me sick if i think of them too long so im gonna end it here
before i go tho ironically enough, the first x-men issue i owned was This one (story a this is that while stuck in some wacko dimension charles accidentally gets himself trapped in logan's mind while utilizing his astral projection. if you were curious). pretty sure i got it for free with another comic set i got years ago since our old comic shop loved to do that, but it's poetic aint it. maybe ill doodle something referencing it..
i should probably look into finishing this arc someday im Dummy curious to even know how it started and how it ends.....
#snap chats#usually this onea them posts i ramble bout in the tags but i have photos and this is Long long so .. i use the main body for once ...#sorry i gave a biography but i never talk to people and i also love typing. im one of those party can-of-worms i fear#i feel like i could talk about this forever because x-men itself has never been super prominent in my childhood#it was just kinda there in the background BUT comics themselves have always been with me. theyre a keystone to me i think#but yeah. x-men definitely sticks a lot harder than avengers does now OOPS this is not me taking shots i am just SAYING#i have a lot of old marvel doodles tbh .. i found an old deadpool one i remember drawing with my bro during a car ride#kinda funny how much my bro and i bond i dont think of it much but I Guess thats another reason why comics are special to me#we dont bond much- i dont bond with my fam in general tbh we're kinda. Isolated in a way LOL so its cool we're tight at least#if you wanna go deeper bout Comics And My Family my dad really liked comics growing up- more dc tho maybe#apparently he used to draw hulk a lot but if he did those drawings are loooong gone.. at least i know who to blame for me drawing#he loves superman tho. i remember id get embarrassed watching superhero cartoons and superman was on screen when he was around#for some reason i thought id get in trouble if he caught me watching superman but when he did once he was real happy so. tf wrong with me#he loves to say hes superman a lot and id be like Dad... Stop... LMAO but in the cheesiest way possible he do be my hero so. accurate ig#but yeah thats my origin story for why i like comics again thank you for reading if you actually read all that#and sorry it got all sappy Unfortunately i be like that sometimes. i am very emotionally constipated and i over explain a lot#ok i fr gonna end it here im gonna keep going by accident if i thinka any longer and i have stuff i still have to do
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body hair is fine on other people OF COURSE :) but I hate it on myself for some reason :) such a mysterious mystery why I might feel that way :) I literally just totally randomly decided that I need to remove my body hair isn't that crazy ha ha! I'm so funny and weird. I can't possibly guess what could have led me to make that completely neutral decision that was not influenced by society in any way.
#listen nobody is going to hold a razor burning event here#although actually if you could find a way to do that without a horrible stench it would be kinda awesome... but I digress#THE POINT IS nobody is going to STOP YOU from removing your body hair I fucking promise ok#I am literally just asking you to not be completely dense!#it is simply not possible for a decision about shaving#especially as a woman#but tbh for anyone#to be made in a vacuum uninfluenced by modern beauty standards#if you do not like your body hair there is a VERY OBVIOUS REASON why that is#stop saying you don't know#you do know! OR you're REALLY fucking stupid
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