#disk horse thoughts

[drakesvalley]

The wildest part about being a system and having known you are a system for a while (6+ years for us) HAS to be seeing people who are just figuring it out fall into holes that you've long left behind.

Like. Yeah. We also thought we needed to keep tabs on everyone to increase communication. In the end it became too unwieldy. Especially since DID evolves with what you experience all the time.

Microlabels are cool and I fully support anyone who uses them, but figuring out what to call every single structure in your system isn't for us anymore.

Another thing we notice is people who try their best to know who is fronting at all given times. A lot of that comes naturally to us nowadays, but it's also... OK not to know. Especially if you're not focusing on anything system related at the time.

I guess a lot of this boils down to, it's okay not to care. It's okay to go with the flow of things and figure out at your own pace. Identity is fluid, especially if you have a dissociative disorder. You don't HAVE to have everything figured out 100% of the time.

It's okay to take it slow. It's okay to not know. It's okay to just exist for a bit. It's okay to live and experience things beyond being a system.

To all the people who are just starting to comprehend this. You do not need to know and label exactly what is happening in your head all the time. Fuck, we sure don't. And we're happier for it.

It's okay to just be you.

[bucksboobs]

The single meanest thing I’ll say about Oliver is that I think he seems a little upset that Buck has a love interest a good portion of the audience likes and he’s not used to sharing the spotlight in that way.

[gay-otlc]

When people say they struggle with keeping track of all the tone tags (the ones like /j or /gen), everyone who disregards that by responding "it's just memorizing some abbreviations/acronyms, it's not that hard, stop complaining" is ableist and a fucking hypocrite. If you're going to advocate for accessibility, advocate for accessibility for all of us.

You can't claim to be an ally to neurodivergent and disabled people and then shit on us for our symptoms. If you actually care about helping us, why aren't you listening when we say we struggle with something? It's never okay to tell disabled people they should be able to do something they can't, that it's not that hard, but it's especially not okay if you do so while pretending to support disabled people.

Also, in addition to the "it's not that hard" statement being ableist, it's utter bullshit. There are so many tone tags to keep track of and memorize. I did a quick google search and one of my top results had ninety one tone tags. That's a lot. That's probably a lot even for a neurotypical person, and I'm not a neurotypical person. I struggle to remember a lot of basic, necessary tasks, so I really can't memorize ninety one tone tags.

Especially when some of them are incredibly ambiguous- only one letter? Acronyms or abbreviations at least give you some clues, one letter tone tags are so incredibly confusing. Like, what does /t mean? There are a lot of words that start with T! (This is a rhetorical question. I know /t means "teasing," but I only know the answer because figuring that out was a memorably frustrating experience.)

And /t is just one example of a tone tag I learned because I kept seeing it in conversation and not understanding and being really confused and frustrated. I can't tell you the number of times I've been messaging someone on discord, and they say something with a tone tag I don't recognize, and I just open a new tab to google the meaning, which is where I find lists like the one above. I usually rely on google instead of asking the person what they meant, because I feel stupid and embarrassed for not knowing this code that everyone else seemingly gets.

Which is exactly how it feels when I don't understand someone's tone in real life! Confused and frustrated and ashamed. And tone tags were supposed to help neurodivergent and disabled people not feel that way, so I don't know how we reached a point where they cause those feelings in many of us.

I can't deny that tone tags are a useful accessibility tool for some. If you find them helpful, it's genuinely good that you have that resource. But they're not accessible for all of us. It's incorrect to act like tone tags are a perfect way to communicate, and it's ableist to disregard our struggles with them and tell us to just try harder.

Either listen to those of us who say they have trouble understanding tone tags, or stop pretending you actually give a shit about accessibility.

[cupcraft]

I think if you havent seen it yet, you should watch Niki talk about misogyny in the mcyt community/her experience in the DSMP and her experience with cc's not speaking out about it. I just saw the clips myself and heres the twitter link to the clips.

From my own experiences and perspective watching Niki and other women cc's, it is abhorrent how much misogyny they face over absolutely nothing and I think it's important as a watcher of cc men in mcyt that you're continuously aware. I'll never forget the hate Niki got during MCC's whereas her male coworkers would get love and support for "doing badly", for example. It's vile how much this stuff still occurs to the cc's on a large scale and thus it also impacts people within cc communities who are affected by the misogynistic rhetoric too.

Please feel free to add on <3.

[bougiebutchbinch]

friends, are we Safely and Decently shipping Stizzy in this chillis tonight

[b4kuch1n]

the king shunned, the lion dead, the knight lost, the princess absent. but the wizard lives.

[cdroloisms]

also, (sorry to soapbox, i promise this will be the last of it), as an added note to the little conversation from yesterday about dreblr--i have to say that there's been ,,, uh, a slightly concerning amount of "us versus them" rhetoric especially about c!tommy apologists recently, as far as i've observed. and look, i get how the fandom's history plays into this, but dreblr isn't some separate special "better" version of the dsmp fandom. we're just dsmp fans who tend positive towards c!dream, which is a valid way of enjoying the story, but you know, so's hating c!dream's guts, lmao. people aren't unable to have valid opinions on the story or on c!dream just because they're negative about him and positive about c!tommy, which is like, literally just normal too, lmao, c!tommy is the generally good-aligned character we follow for most of the story and c!dream is the generally evil-aligned character that hurts him? being an analyst in dreblr doesn't automatically equal being "more correct" just because it's dreblr, and dismissing others' opinions just because they're a c!tommy apologist or whoever apologist isn't exactly a helpful way of approaching meta, either.

obviously no one is obligated to interact with anyone in this fandom that they don't want to interact with--we're here to have fun, it's not actually a professional field of analysis and debate. that being said, there is nothing about liking c!dream that is inherently superior to other dsmp fans. i know i've made a lot of general posts about dreblr versus "the greater fandom" which probably haven't helped with this feeling -- they're largely generalizations based on my experience in this fandom, and i don't want to come off as meaning that bad analysis is something that is Only found outside of dreblr (i've definitely been guilty of shit analysis more than a few times, lol) or that there's nothing that the rest of the fandom outside of c!dream apologist spaces has to offer. when it comes to individual enjoyment of the fandom and the characters, the point im making isn't that everyone has to do outreach to communicate with a c!tommy apologist or anything, lmao -- just that, you know, the general shady comments about how much better we are at analysis than those darn c!tommy apologists when they're not really relevant don't reeeeeally have to be as common as they are.

[rosesradio]

”silverusso is such a dark and toxic ship !!1! 😡”

silverusso fans:

that’s what makes it interesting?? you don’t have to like it, but it’s the equivalent of saying murder is wrong so murder mysteries shouldn’t exist 🧍

[spyroz]

Being non dysphoric trans at least for me is more of a political statement than a description of literal reality. It says "I'm for bodily autonomy in all circumstances and without explanation" but it does also say "I love my trans body"

Every person in the world would likely become 'dysphoric' if described or gendered or viewed in a way antithetical to their self image, trans or otherwise. So pulling the "erm technically you do have dysphoria" response just isn't necessary. We already know this. It depends on how you define the word "dysphoria", but idgaf about semantics like that, my goal is simply to send a message and describe myself in the *closest possible way* to the truth. But nothing is ever *entirely* true

People posting about how "non dysphoric trans people aren't really non dysphoric" are missing the point because dysphoric or nondysphoric was never a binary in the first place. These are made up words and I'm using the one closest to my experience, doesn't mean it has to fit 10000% of the time. It isn't so black and white, nothing is.

[orange-orchard-system]

What's with the influx of people blazing posts recently...? Am I just Blazed Post George, somehow getting hit with an above average number of blazed posts on my dash? Every time I scroll it feels like there's five new people putting random shit on my dash... and for what? 9 times out of 10 you're getting blocked for being so intrusive. I can understand when it's small businesses but it's usually just random posts. Where the hell is this coming from? Is blazing posts suddenly the hot new thing (well after it was added as a new feature)?

(These are rhetorical questions but feel free to reblog + add on)

[how-queerious]

been seein lot of posts calling the cast weird for the way they/their characters are being with the whole "destined" aspect of callowmoore but like consider who does and does not seem to outwardly ship it that way.

maybe there are things and dynamics i've been missing but to me there is a clear division between which characters (not actors) are pushing it and which are not; The main people seeming to push for it are FCG, Imogen, Laudna, and Fearne. The main people just watching and not really swaying either way are Orym, Chet, and Ash. Here's my thoughts on the possible motivations for that from a character perspective. With that in mind, I have focused on the PCs here; I have all the love in the world for matt as a DM, but to untangle the intricacies of his character work in literally even just one episode at a time is a whole other post. Accidental essay below the cut y'all.

broad strokes are that the camps are divided primarily* by who has and hasn't had extensive adult romantic relationships. Laudna, Imogen, and FCG are all experiencing what seem to be their first real adult relationships, and have had notably, explicitly little experience with romance at all beyond that. Fearne herself, despite her age, also seems to have had very little experience with romance and love (remembering that casual or platonic sex is not romance). They have all been starry-eyed and naive about love in prior episodes, and Laudna in particular has a childlike view of it. To compound this, Fearne has been lonely the vast majority of her life, just her, her nana, and their companions of questionable sentience and willingness. Exhibited in some of the darker episodes, and stated by ashley (at some point), she is literally just learning how to feel as mortals do in the prime material plane. Many of us as young shippers were drawn to the allure of the "Soulmate AU" for a lot of the same reasons.

On the other side of the coin, we have the three opposed or neutral. Chet and Orym, unlike any of the others, have both experienced long-term mature romantic relationships. Though Chet often focuses on the sex, and Orym tends not to focus on anything if he can help it, both have shown in their character choices and interactions with people from their past that they have the understanding of mature and healthy(ish) romance. As a contrast to their knowledgability, Ashton has only ever been burned by what should have been love in the past, and has not experienced romance. They have spent their whole life fighting fate, and will continue to do so for at least the time being. He is just learning to let themself love platonically, of course they don't want to follow "fate" to a romantic relationship with someone as chaotic and beautiful and terrifying as Fearne. They'll do the cool combos with her, and he'll flirt and tease, but anything else is unknown territory in a field already littered with the casualties of their past attempts to trust.

Though they may seem to be pushing for this fated dynamic in a way that feels very off for CR, there are genuine and realistic character motivations for them to do so. Perhaps I'm putting too much thought and faith behind it, but I think the specificity of who is or isn't pushing speaks great volumes to the fact that these are all people who have a wealth of theatric and improvisation experience and knowledge behind them. They are all actors with more than my lifetime of hard work behind this "silly game" they play, and I think we ought to consider that.

[bucksboobs]

To be honest, supposedly progressive people deciding they can be as homophobic as they like as soon as a gay man stops fitting their ideals is a pretty time honored pattern. I remember how this site and the worse blue site acted with Pete Buttigieg.

[theywontletmebeprincipal]

how about instead of immediately assuming bad faith n snapping back when someone misinterprets your post as a reference to media you just say "I am aware that the thing I'm talking about shares a name and/or premise with (thing you that think I am referencing), however I am now clarifying that I'm talking specifically about the real life phenomenon" I think it would save everyone involved a lot of time n insults

[silassstingy]

okay so i have been on vacation for the last week but!!

when i AM on here i have seen so many of my friends and muts having to defend their enjoyment of tommy/bucktommy to soo many annoying ass anons

and i see a lot of people saying back to them, "why can't we enjoy tommy for now???" or "no matter how long he's around, can't we just have fun???"

and FUCK THAT tbh

i am tired of us having to settle on the "even if this relationship only lasts a season or two" like, NAH. i want endgame (even tho i kinda hate the word-LOL)!!! i want buck moving in with tommy!!! i want marriage!!! babies!! buck's gonna be sooo fucking happy tbfh!!

tired of being "well buddie might still happen" or "whatever happens happens".... i can still ship buddie in whatever way i want to and still think of/want the above for bucktommy.

[gnometa233]

This whole thing about people being so defensive about "lesbians can have sex with men" is just...so pointless

Like yeah, nothing is stopping someone from fucking men and calling themselves a lesbian. But it's still fucking stupid and most people (including allies with a basic grasp of lgbt+ politics) will say that.

Not to mention like yeah, it certain situations it can happen (surrogacy if they dont have money for IVF, sex work, having sex with men before they find out they're lesbians) but those are exceptions. If you identify as a lesbian and actively go out of your way to have sex with men AND ENJOY IT (this one's the key), you're not a lesbian. Plain and simple. This isn't gatekeeping, and just because its exclusionary doesn't mean it's a bad thing. There are plenty of other labels for you to use that can include you. Just leave lesbians alone. Your actions don't exist in a vacuum

[baptism-inblood]

"What if what if what if" bitch shut up oh my GOD THERE ARE A MILLION POSSIBILITIES OF WHAT IF'S THAT COULD HAPPEN YR JUST CHOOSING THE ONE THAT JUSTIFIES YOUR ABLEISM LMAO GOD