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Move To A Darker Place
This is a story of Man Vs. Machine.
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Last March, my father attempted to file his Taxes.
My beloved father is a Boomer. Unlike most Boomers, my father is rather handy with technology because he was one of the people that had a not-insignificant hand in Developing a hell of a lot of it. He was studying Computer Science at Cal Poly before the computer science degree existed. I have many fond childhood memories of skipping through the aisles of various electronic and computer part warehouses while Dad described something that either terrified the staff or made them worship him as a God.Ā He taught himself how to use his smartphone.Ā Internationally.
So when he saw the option to file digitally with the IRS through the āID.meā program, he leapt at the chance to celebrate the Federal Government finally entering the Digital Age.
It was all going swimmingly for about six hours, until he was ready to file and the system told him that it needed to verify his identity.Ā
āVery Well.ā said my father, a man unafraid of talking to himself and getting something out of the conversation. āIt wouldnāt do for me to get someone elseās return.ā
The System told him that it needed him to take a āDigital Image IDā.
a.k.a: A Selfie.
āA-ha!ā Dad beams. Dad is very good at taking selfies. He immediately pulled out his phone, snapped one, and tried to upload it.
Please log into your Id.me Account and use the provided app to submit your Digital Image ID. The System clarified.
āOh. You should have said so.āĀ Dad pouted, but used his phone to log onto the ID.me account, do the six security verification steps and double-checked that the filing looked the same as it did on the desktop, gave the IRS like nine permissions on his phone, and held up the camera to take his Federal Privacy Invasion Selfie.
Please align your face to the indicated grid. Said The System, pulling up a futuristic green-web-of-polygons approximation.
āOoh, very Star Trek. Gene Roddenberry would HATE this!ā Dad said cheerfully, aligning his face to the grid.Ā My father is a bitā¦ cavalier, when it comes to matters of personal information and federal government, because heās been on FBI watchlists since the late 60ās when he was protesting The Vietnam War and Ronald Regan before heād broken containment. Alas.
Anyway, there is very little information the federal government does not have on him already, but heās as good at stalking the FBI as they are at stalking him, and had worked out a solution:Ā He has something approaching a friendship with the local Federal Agent (Some guy named āLarryā. Allegedly), and got Larry hooked on Alternative Histories and Dadās collection of carefully-researched āthere is very likely buried treasure hereā stories, and Larry is loath to bother his favorite Historical Fanfiction author too much.
But I digress.
After thinking for a minute, The System came back with an Error Message. Please remove glasses or other facial obstructions.
And here is where the real trouble began.
See, my father wears glasses that do substantially warp the appearance of his face, because he is so nearsighted that he is legally blind without them. His natural focal point is about 4 inches in front of his nose.Ā While Dad can still take a selfie because he (approximately) knows where his phone is if itās in his hand, he cannot see the alignment grid.
He should ask someone to take it for him! I hear the audience say. Yes, that would be the sane and reasonable thing to do, but Dad was attempting to do taxes at his residence in Fort Collins, while his immediate family was respectively in Denver, Texas and Canada.Ā He tried calling our neighbors, who turned out to be in Uganda.
He looked down at the dog, Arwen, and her little criminal paws that can open doorknobs, but not operate cell phones.
She looked back at him, and farted.
āWell, Iāll give it a try, but if it gives me too much trouble, Iāll call Larry, and Larry can call the IRS about it.ā Dad told her.Ā
She continued to watch him. Arwen is an Australian Kelpie (a type of cattle-herding dog), going on 14 years old, deaf as a post and suffering from canine dementia now, but she still retains her natural instinct to Micromanage. She was also trained as a therapy dog, and even if she canāt hear my dad, still recognizes the body language of a man setting himself up for catastrophe.
So, squinting in the late afternoon light next to the back door, Dad attempted to line his face up with a grid he could only sort-of see, and took A Federal Selfie.
The System thought about it for a few moments.
Image Capture Failed: Insufficient Contrast. The System replied. Please move to a darker place.
ā...Huh.ā Dad frowned. āAlright.ā
He moved to the middle of his office, away from the back door, lit only by the house lighting and indirect sunlight, and tried again.
Image Capture Failed. Please move to a darker place.
āWhat?ā Dad asked the universe in general.
āWhuff.ā Arwen warned him against sunk costs.
Dad ignored her and went into the bathroom, the natural habitat of the selfie. Surely, only being lit by a light fixture that hadnāt been changed since Dad was attempting to warn everyone about Regan would be suitably insufficient lighting for The System.Ā It took some negotiating, because that bathroom is āStanding Room Onlyā not āStanding And Holding Your Arms Out In Front Of You Roomā.Ā He ended up taking the selfie in the shower stall.
As The System mulled over the latest attempt, Arwen shuffled over and kicked open the door to watch.
Image Capture Failed. Please Move to a Darker Place.
āDo you mean Spiritually?ā Dad demanded.
āWhuff.ā Arwen cautioned him again.
Determined to succeed, or at least get a different error message that may give him more information, Dad entered The Downstairs Guest Room.Ā It is the darkest room in the house, as it is in the basement, and only has one legally-mandated-fire-escape window, which has blinds.Ā Dad drew those blinds, turned off the lights and tried AGAIN.
Image Capture Failed. Please Move To A Darker Place.
āDO YOU WANT ME TO PHOTOGRAPH MYSELF INSIDE OF A CAVE??ā Dad howled.Ā
āWHUFF!ā Arwen reprimanded him from under the pull-out bed in the room. Itās where she attempts to herd everyone when itās thundering outside, so the space is called her āSafety Caveā.
Dad frowned at the large blurry shape that was The Safety Cave.
āWhy not?ā he asked, the prelude to many a Terrible Plan.Ā With no small amount of spiteful and manic glee, Dad got down onto the floor, and army-crawled under the bed with Arwen to try One Last Time. Now in near-total darkness, he rolled on his side to be able to stretch his arms out, Arwen slobber-panting in his ear, and waited for the vague green blob of the Facial grid to appear.
This time, when he tapped the button, the flash cctivated.
āGOD DAMN IT!ā Dad shouted, dropping the phone and rubbing his eyes and cursing to alleviate the pain of accidentally flash-banging himself. Arwen shuffled away from him under the bed, huffing sarcastically at him.
Image Capture Failed. Please move to a darker place.
āMOTHERFU- hang on.ā Dad squinted.Ā The System sounded strange. Distant and slightly muffled.
Dad squinted really hard, and saw the movement of Arwen crawling out from under the bed along the phoneās last known trajectory.
āARWEN!ā Dad shouted, awkwardly reverse-army crawling out from under the bed, using it to get to his feet and searching for his glasses, which had fallen out of his pocket under the bed, so by the time he was sighted again, Arwen had had ample time to remove The Offending Device.
He found her out in the middle of the back yard, the satisfied look of a Job Well Done on her face. She did not have the phone.Ā
āArwen.ā Dad glared. Itās a very good glare. Dad was a teacher for many years and used it to keep his class in order with sheer telepathically induced embarrassment, and his father once glared a peach tree into fecundity.Ā Ā
Arwen regarded him with the casual interest a hurricane might regard a sailboat tumbling out of its wake. She is a force of nature unto herself and not about to be intimidated by a half-blind house ape.Ā She also has cataracts and might not be able to make out the glare.
āI GIVE UP!ā Dad shouted, throwing his hands in the air and returning to the office to write to the IRS that their selfie software sucks ass. Pleased that she had gotten her desired result, Arwen followed him in.
To Dadās immense surprise, the computer cheerfully informed him that his Federally Secure Selfie had been accepted, and that they had received and were now processing his return!
āWhat the FUCK?ā Dad glared. āOh well. If Iāve screwed it up, Larry can call me.ā
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I bring this up because recently, Dad received an interesting piece of mail.
It was a letter from the IRS, addressed to him, a nerve-wracking thing to recessive at the best of times.Ā Instead of a complaint about Dadās Selfie Skills, it was a letter congratulating him on using the new ID.me System.Ā It thanked him for his help and expressed hopes he would use it again next year, and included the selfie that The System had finally decided to accept.
āYou know, my dad used to complain about automation.ā Dad sighed, staring at the image. āIncidentals my boy!Ā My secretary saves the state of California millions of dollars a year catching small errors before they become massive ones! Heād say. Fought the human resources board about her pay every year.Ā I used to think he was overestimating how bad machines were and underestimating human error, but you know? He was right.ā
He handed me the image.
My father was, technically, in the image.Ā A significant amount of the bottom right corner is taken up by the top of his forehead and silver hair.Ā Most of the image, the part with the facial-recognition markers on it, was composed of Arwenās Alarmed and Disgusted Doggy face.
āOh no!ā I cackled. āCrap, does this mean you have to call the IRS and tell them youāre not a dog?ā
āProbably.ā Dad sighed. āI know who Iām gonna bother first though.ā he said, taking out his phone (Dad did find his phone a few hours after Arwen absconded with it when mom called and the early spinach started ringing).Ā
āHey Larry!ā Dad announced to the local federal agent. āYouāre never gonna believe this. My dog filed my taxes!ā
Larry considered this for a moment. āIs this the dog that stole my sandwich? Out of my lockedĀ car?ā he asked suspiciously.
āThe very same.ā Dad grinned.
āHm. Clever Girl.ā Federal Agent Larry sighed. āI figured it was only a matter of time before she got into tax fraud.ā
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I'm a disabled artist making my living writing these stories. If you enjoy my stories, please consider supporting me on Ko-fi or Pre-ordering my Family Lore Book on Patreon. Thank you!
#Family Lore#Dogs#arwen#Arwen the Crime Dog#Taxes#Ronald Regan mention (derogatory)#long post under the cut#this one is funny this time#I could really use some extra tip money this month
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having good & true friends will literally save and protect you in a million unfathomable ways. like okay we have written so many times about lovers. but the way a platonic friend laughs and cries with you. the way they hold your hand at 14 years old and at 34. the way they keep a little silver tie to you, touching base over and over and over. how you can go years without talking, only to re-meet and discover: oh shit! you're still cool!
there are people who have been in my life for more than half of it, and i have loved every version of them. do you know how fucking beautiful that is. yeah love will save the world. but the way friends love you is gonna save the you.
#and before one of u is like '' i have no friends :(" i used to be there too actually#abusive partner cut me off from ALL of 'em. i didn't think i was lovable#it made me EXCEPTIONALLY shy. i still am actually!!!!#i just ... started saying ''yes.''#i would take pictures of flyers in my library and go to whatever events they had#i started taking community classes#if someone mentioned like ''i am gonna start x group'' i actually took a deep breath#and approached them to be like . okay i want in.#i started making the first move with new people - a small compliment#a smile or a little joke. just to share the space with them.#i have MASSIVE social anxiety. bad parent and bad relationship will do that to ya.#but i just... kept going. and going. and going. to each of these little things. and then...#like. .... idk i just am very blessed. i have a STUPID number of friends#a lot of which i reconnected with. bc it turns out love is never wasted. adult life just.#like. gets in the way. but also... i loved u as a weird little kid. i love u now as a weird big adult.#i promise i PROMISE ur friends are out there. u just have 2 find them. and btw#i didn't make friends with everyone. but i did get a lot of people to smile or laugh.#aint that something.#this process took me something like 2 years. it was HARD!!!!!!!!!!#i love u!!! hard things are often worth it!!!
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"I'll show you every day that choosing to live was worth it"
some of my favourite scenes from @hijinks-n-lowjinks' fic things i would miss from the other side . this fic tore my heart out fr but like in a good way and i wanted to pay it homage the only way i know how <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#I LOVE PLOTTING AND ALSO SCHEMING#listen i have a lot of feelings and i needed 2 process them and i do that by making art 2 target my mutuals directly#read my about it's there it's in the fineprint if we talk You Are Not Safe smile#i just . BITING BITING BITING this fic#the domesticity the grief the casual yet unfathomably deep soulmatism.......im ruined i tell u Ruined#so naturally i dropped everything#remember how i said lefts/rights r my enemy my beloathed my nemesis. MIRRORS MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE FHGDSAJFGJS I WANTED DEATH#i was like this is incorrect. no this is correct. flips them around in my head. no im wrong again actually#purgatory tbh but we got there (watch me be wrong again tho if i am wrong again i think i will Cry)#anyway!!! i don't have much else to say except pls read the fic and show jinx some love they 1000% deserve it this fic 1000% deserves it#i could only draw so many scenes but i would draw all of it if i could#fr i ws so paranoid abt accuracy lmao cut 2 footage of me looking up rice cooker models and wtf the colour 'carnelian' was#i hope i got everything right i hope i did it justice :'>#also if any1 mentions how megumi's arm in 3 is at an awkward angle. look me in the eye and tell me youve comfortably cuddled with someone#i will call u a liar
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Part 1!
..of an episode that reveals that if something looks like a space horror and sounds like a space horror, maybe it is a space horror.
Who would've guessed?~
Previous Next
Masterpost
#marble sky#marble sky comic#oscar#ward#Sculptor#Alcor#i feel like there should be some tw tags but I donāt know which ones :1#tw violence#maybe?#ah okay i got it#tw dissection#tw vivisection#no one is cut on the screen but they are mentioning it#tw blood
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Michael Aftonās awkward family reunion in FNAF 3,,
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#michael afton#springtrap#william afton#fnaf#fnaf 3#fazbear frights#five nights at freddy's#spiderverse#itsv#Yknow how crazy fnaf 3 is in retrospect#just a dad and his son meeting up again face to face after X number of years#Michael has not been called his og name in forever so cut him some slack here#just so funny thinking springtrap jumpscaring himself#when recognizing the night guard is his son#tbh probably make him want to end him more š#spiderverse mentioned š„
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au where asriel comes home early
#this came to me in a dream but i dont remember the rest#i just think it would be pretty interesting if asriel comes home since im assuming the game#takes place over a series of days until he comes back from college#i havent kept up with deltarune since chapter 2 came out so i dont remember much abt the theories around asriel#esp what ralsei is supposed to be- im kinda suspicious of ralsei actually since he didnt mention the roaring until#the end of chapter 2. plus we dont know why hes able to go between dark worlds without freezing so im a little sus#plus noelle points out that he looks like asriel so it makes me wonder if ralsei knows abt that or ow he would react to that information#and when noelle points it out she gets cut off because she says ralsei turned to face them as she was thinking that. hmmmm#im also curious if we actually get to see asriel and what he looks like so im looking forward to that#my art#myart#doodles#utdr#deltarune#ralsei#asriel dreemurr#deltarune asriel#kris dreemurr#deltarune kris#deltarune fanart#au#i dont think id actually call it an au its more of a one off but if anyone wants to take this and run go for it ^_^#its probably already been done at some point anyway lol
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Making a post compiling some of my thoughts on the new Pristine Cut music broken down by chapter because I have. many thoughts and thought maybe people might find them interesting!
The Cage's whole sound was so instantly memorable to me. I love all the different metallic percussion used: perfectly in-theme for a world envelloped in chains
There's soft yet eerie metallophones like the mock birdsong of chains, clanging bells like a death knell
It's mixed with shrill strings: reminscent of the scraping sound that plays in All Eyes On Me as the Prisoner cuts her head off, but quiet and distant, like a haunting memory that repeats itself in your mind
I also love the way the sound echoes - giving the impression of the emptiness of the woods & cabin
An Open Door pulls at my heart: the soft piano and drawn out sound stands in contrast to everything leading up to it
It plays whether you break the pattern by leaving or perpetuate the pattern and watch your dance, so the contrast of it feels representitive to me of a shift in perspective (either the Princess realizing her own control, or you realizing your lack of it)
Our Happy Ending is so damn evocative I need to break it down
It's so. drawn. out. Every note drags, with every instrument coming in at slightly different times
It has a really hollow sound to it: where Damsel's tracks have piano, strings, and woodwinds, Our Happy Ending is reduced to only the strings. There's a lot of full and rich music out there written for strings, but this (intentionally) isn't one of them.
Instead of playing every note in each chord, the instruments frequently double the same notes (just in different octaves) and omit other notes, making the sound even emptier
The arpeggio of the Princess' motif (which is prominent in Damsel's tracks) does appear around 1:30 in, but for a lot of the track the melody is very static, mostly stepping between a few nearby notes, as if it's too exhausted to do anything more complicated
It doesn't even loop smoothly in-game: there's a record scratch and a few seconds of silence before it continues, like it's forcing itself to keep going through the motions
It all sounds serene when the chapter begins but the more you listen the more deeply lethargic it becomes. It did so much to make this chapter even more viscerally uncomfortable for me
And then there's I Meant It. What is there to say. (Actually I do have some things to say)
It's noticeably in 3 (which I think is unique to this track), giving it an appropriately dance-like feeling
While it starts beautifully simple, the embellishments added to the theme as it goes on bring a sense of playfulness, reflecting the energy that grows in your dance the longer it goes on
The Princess & The Dragon!!! I speculated about this one when it was teased a few months back and it was so gratifying to hear it in context! I was very wrong about the route it plays in but I absolutely caught onto how it's an inversion of the typical setup!
The biggest example of this is how the main melody of the theme is the same as The Princess' main theme, but played in reverse! (and with a different rhythm)
The piano also plays descending lines, as opposed to the ascending lines usually heard in other tracks in this game (a good example is in The Unknown Together)
This all reflects how the chapter itself reverses the setup of the game by putting the player in the perspective of the Princess (maybe this is the melody she's used to hearing?)
The call and response nature between the humming (done by Amelia aka the Shifting Mound vocalist!!!) & flute invokes the Princess & Dragon themselves: the melody would be incomplete without both parts
It's such a warm theme too - where The Princess has a quiet somberness to it, The Princess and The Dragon feels rich and vibrant - it feels right
The Life-Taker takes the new motif from The Princess and The Dragon and puts it in the minor key of the World-Ender (I also really like the way the names of these tracks parallel each other)
Like World-Ender it's tense and uneasy, but it plays at a slower tempo, with plenty of long pauses and empty space in the melody: it feels appropriate for the silent, staring body standing in front of you
It also feels more static to me than World-Ender does with its constantly moving piano, which is reflective of how little power you have in the scenario. As TLQ, you have to make the decisions, but as the Princess, the most you can do is watch and wait in suspense
Also this is more of an audio editing thing but I ADORE the way World-Ender cuts in when you switch back mid-chord - really hammers in how your perspective is being forcibly shifted right in the middle of the action
The reversed motif returning when you leave with the Princess or merge with her again is also very sweet: whether you're sharing a body anymore the connection and understanding you've gained remained :)
I love all the new Fury tracks! They're so gritty
I'm happy they kept a similar sound to The Fury's track in the base game because it has such a cool and unique vibe and I was mildly worried that the process of being unwound would just lead the droning sounds of TLQ (still cool, just less unique)
I like how the music still cuts out when you get initially unwound, leaving just faint buzzing - it keeps the shock of that moment from the base game but keeps you grounded in the present by denying you the silence of death. Where in the base game Fury denying you death barely mattered, now you can feel it down to the unwound yet still present soundtrack
I like how Hand In Claw (which plays when escaping the tunnel with Den) introduces this growling sort of guitar sound, rumbling like the sound of caving rocks
It keeps the fast, driving percussive elements of the other Den tracks but gives it a more obvious melodic shape, as you realize that there's more to her after all
It sounds totally distinct from the other Den tracks in general, and that makes sense since its respective path is also unique among the many, many variants of the chapter
The live rendition of The Apotheosis was a fun surprise - I heard it play and just went "...that's different right?"
I still love the way the theme begins as the Apotheosis herself unfurls from the cabin: it's just as breathtaking as it was the first time
I was wondering before release how this track could be expanded on when it felt like such a transcendent and insurpassable theme (it's also used for The Shifting Mound after all) - but the game actually doesn't build on it, just letting it play, only cutting from it in extreme moments. I think that's kind of nice: the power and awe of the track speaks for itself
Meanwhile A Tapestry Undone is essentially The Apotheosis without the piano, orchestra, or any of the instrumentals that give it its sense of power
The vocals sound hollow and distant - she seems farther away, her influence less overwhelming, whether due to dissociative pain or because in that moment you're compelled to lash out at her in spite of whatever godlike power she might have had over you
In-game, the drones of TLQ are also faintly audible, which makes sense since the Apotheosis is tearing at the walls of the construct (ie. you)
#og post#music#stp#tpc#slay the princess#the pristine cut#the cage#happily ever after#the princess and the dragon#the fury#the den#the apotheosis#the pristine cut spoilers#slay the princess spoilers#stp spoilers#tpc spoilers#<- hope that covers all the spoiler tags ppl are using#i had much more to say for some tracks than others but still wanted to mention all the routes bc i like them all :)#i desperately want the reversed princess motif in p&d to become common knowledge bc it's so goddamn cool#i will keep talking about it if that's what it takes#this is a threat
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Another thing I really have to give TF One credit for is the sheer amount of violence they got away with by virtue of all their characters being robots. Like, where else could our deuteragonist-turned-final-boss literally rip the villain in half on-screen and walk away with a PG rating?
#not to mention like. everything else#bee cutting people in half#d16 choking out starscream#sentinel carving the brand onto d's chest#megatron shooting *through* orion#this is not to say this is *bad* of course I love robogore as much as anyone but damn. *damn*#tf#tfone#transformers#transformers one#maccadam
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Maurice girlies (gender-neutral) it's my duty to inform you that a Vietnamese LGBT movie channel have made a fan reconstruction of the 1987 movie, by adding all deleted scenes (which include establishing wayyyy earlier that Alec works at Durham's, establishing Alec's bisexuality, Maurice's beautiful ending monologue to Clive, and many more) resulting in a movie that's almost 3 hours long, and uploaded it to youtube (with English subtitles!) here!
#EDIT: this is not an official version! per someone's request in the replies i feel the need to mention this is NOT official lmao#the 2h20mins is the director's cut#EDIT 2: I DID NOT MAKE THIS WTF LMAO#maurice 1914#maurice 1987#Maurice#clive durham#maurice hall#alec scudder#e. m. forster#my posting#3rd degree failpost#mauriceposting
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glados saying "once testing starts, im required by protocol to keep interaction with you to a minimum. this will be our only chance to talk." during the beginning of portal 2 only to immediately talk to chell during every single test is funny on its own but that along with the cut scene where she stops the elevator between tests to ask if there's "anything you'd like to say to me? anything at all?"...she's so lonely and desperate </3
#another line i wish wasn't cut was ''you really are doing great... chell <3'' like she sounds SO HAPPY. ...š„ŗš„ŗ#i also REALLY enjoy:#''did you ever stop to think that eventually there's a point where your name gets mentioned for the very last time? well here it is.#im going to kill you.. chell :-)''#i get why it was cut but. something about it.#chelldos#portal#ok to rb!!!!#it would be so fun if i had two popular chelldos textposts#oroeginals
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xelqua's evo form, also known as grian's twin form, hes still clingy !
#no mention of selfslash or shipping pls thank u#my art#sketching#grian#xelqua#grian would taunt xelqua with memories he cant remember. ''whos blanket is this ?'' ''yours when youre ~teeny tiny.''#grian cuts his fruit without thinking abt it <- like aether did-
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the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.
capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.
now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.
and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.
and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.
and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".
it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"
#this was much longer i had to cut it down for legibility#but i do want to say i am aware this post doesnt touch on human rights violations as a result of fast fashion#that is because it deserves its own post with a completely different tone#i am an environmental educator#so that's what i know the most about. it wouldn't be appropriate of me to mention off-hand the real and legitimate suffering#that people are going through#without doing my research and providing real ways to help#this is a vent post about a thing i'm watching happen; not a call to action. it would be INCREDIBLY demeaning#to all those affected by the fast fashion industry to pretend that a post like this could speak to their suffering#unfortunately one of the horrible things about latestage capitalism as an activist is that SO many things are linked to this#and i WANT to talk about all of them but it would be a book in its own right. in fact there ARE books about each level of this#and i encourage you to seek them out and read them!!! i am not an expert on that i am just a person on tumblr doing my favorite activity#(complaining)#and it's like - this is the individual versus the industry problem again right because im blaming myself#for being an expert on environmental disaster (which is fucking important) but not knowing EVERYTHING about fast fashion#i'm blaming myself for not covering the many layers of this incredibly complicated problem im pointing out#rather than being like. yeah so actually the fault here lies with the billion dollar industries actually.#my failure to be able to condense an incredibly immense problem that is BOOK-LENGTH into a single text post that i post for free#is not in ANY fucking way the same amount of harm as. you know. the ACTUAL COMPANIES doing this ACTUAL THING for ACTUAL MONEY.#anyway im gonna go donate money while i'm thinking about it. maybe you can too. we can both just agree - well i fuckin tried didn't i#which is more than their CEOs can say
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jiang fengmian#yu ziyuan#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#Almost axed this comic but then I remembered I cut the previous argument between them and I guess they can have this.#and by 'this' I mean their toxic arranged marriage verbal battles.#As I previously mentioned in a comic I have chosen to see them as mlm and wlw in an unfulfilled relationship.#The yearning is for companionship. I think they do care for each other it's just something deeply complicated. And bitter.#I truly feel for JC and WWX in this scene because while it's implied YZY really pushes the limit...it's apparent this isn't new.#And it's so petty! Anyone who lived through a parent pitting you against a sibling can tell you that this stuff messed them up#regardless of what side you were on (the golden one or the fuck up).#It doesn't matter what is said. It matters that it was said at all. That you can't shake the concept once it was spoken.#The Jiang household is so much more miserable the deeper you examine what's going on and how they cope with it.#Knowing that a parent does not like you is just awful. I wish everyone who's been through it all the best. You didn't deserve that.#Next update is back to the jokes! Remember jokes? It jingled merrily...How I miss the sound of those bells...
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De-aged and injured Danny
Danny is found out by his parents. They don't take it well.
Clockwork is very upset about this, because he'd gambled on almost-certain odds of them being chill about it. So now he has to run damage-control before this very unlikely time-line goes even further off the deep end.
Unfortunately, Danny needs to be in the living world, not the Infinite Realms. Which means that Clockwork needs to put Danny somewhere safe. Somewhere where nobody will find him.
And double-unfortunately, the only place that remotely fits this bill is to contact Lady Gotham.
City-spirits aren't... super-reliable. They're Neverborns who very very rarely consider "humanoid shapes" worth figuring out. So they just kind of... exist. An ectoplasmic presence that's undeniable, but also extremely difficult to have a conversation with.
Thankfully, Lady Gotham is (for all of her... quirks) generally very hero-aligned. Which is why she's the best one to ask for sanctuary for Danny.
Danny who Clockwork de-aged as a way to "limit his injuries" of being vivisected.
Lady Gotham agrees, but she only has one "safe place" to put him. And her Knight is a little bit too paranoid for her to just dump an injured child in his lair, without causing more trouble than it's worth.
But it's hardly a difficult thing, to arrange a few things, and place Danny in a spot where his injuries will cause her Knight to hurry to his aid.
Such as... in a room filled with medical equipment, right next door to where Joker has just lost a fight with Batman.
Things escalate somewhat when Batman finds him and makes some assumptions about what Joker has been up to. Tempers run a bit high, someone loses a few extra teeth, someone else has to physically drag Bruce off Joker's body before he beats him to death, and the Joker considers the whole thing a grand old laugh (he has no idea what's going on, but it sure pissed off Batty, and that's always a treat).
Of course, the Batfam has to actually investigate the scene, evacuate Danny, give Danny medical aid, and then also ask Danny about what happened.
Danny wakes up and is very confused about a lot of things.
He's no longer being vivisected. Great. Love that part.
He's somewhere he doesn't recognize (the Batcave). Could be good, could be bad. At least the bed is pretty nice?
He's very small. This feels like a personal attack. He might not have gotten a good growth-spurt yet, but taking away what he had is cruel and unusual.
And there's a weirdo in an... armored bat-costume? Who isn't setting off his ghost-sense? What the hell kind of "normal" person wears something like that?
Still, Danny does answer the questions that Batman asks him, because... well, there's a green post-it-note in his pocket that says he shouldn't lie.
So Danny tells Batman about his parents cutting him up "for science". And Batman hears that the Joker somehow managed to hire two mad scientists who (upon the tiniest bit of suggestion from the Joker, who'd definitely seen the similarities between Danny and Jason and thought it would be a "funny prank") had leapt at the opportunity to vivisect their own son.
This is definitely worrying, because from the phrasing, they'd been "wanting to do it for a long time". And considering Danny's slow heartbeat and low body-temperature? They'd been wanting to do it because he was a meta.
So, somewhere out there (the Bats had found no trace of the two) were two deranged lunatics who wanted to cut open metas to "see how they worked".
Batman does the very reasonable thing and actually contacts the rest of the Justice League with their descriptions, just in case they'd managed to leave Gotham before the Bats had tracked them down.
#danny might mention the anti-ecto acts. which would lead them to the GIW which would lead them to Amity Park and to the Fentons.#and would likely stir up a LOT of outrage for a bunch of politicians effectively creating a loophole in a very clear-cut humanitarian law#(the meta-protection acts). and those politicians would probably be very nervous about having gotten caught.#(think about all the cool ecto-tech they could use to make tons and tons of money. as long as ecto-entities don't have any rights)#also also. upon investigating amity park in person? jazz would probably witness against her parents on the spot. no questions asked.#like. she comes home. and danny is gone? her parents are talking about ghost-kidnapping? and now someone official is asking questions?#yes. please. please arrest my parents and tell me where my little brother is. tell me he's safe. tell me he isn't buried somewhere.#jazz is very aware of the risks of her parents ''reacting badly'' to the phantom-reveal. which is why she's been covering for him.#but yes. this is mostly written out as a ''and here is de-aged and traumatized danny in batfam-custody''-setting idea.#bcs involving LadyGotham is fine. but having her TALK to her bats? communicate clearly? make her presence known?#never. she'd refuse on principle. she'd rather stage an arkham-breakout and indirectly murder thousands.#it's her love-language. you wouldn't understand.#laughing#my writing#danny phantom#dc comics#batman#stories
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ch 5 is coming in twsten ch5 is coming in twsten ch5 is coming in twsten (we gon die it's been a YEAR since I saw some clips and I have not emotionally recovered from the incredible deliveries by Silver's seiyuu because holy fuck) EGOOOOO ARE YOU READY TO SEE EVERYONE DESCENDING INTO MADNESS AGAIN (and a pool of tears??? MINE SPECIFICALLY)
YESSSSSS I AM SO EXCITED FOR EVERYONE ON ENG, chapter 5 is some of the most PEAK Diafamily content imo. š¤ it's definitely my favorite part of episode 7 so far! (though 6 is pretty close...)
some (mostly) non-spoilery advice: on the hex maps, check out the non-required story cells, especially in the later parts! some are basically just throwaways, but there's some real good scenes hidden in there too that are potentially missable. š„ (it shows which cells you've cleared on previous attempts, so if you're low on resources and/or super impatient like me, do just the required ones to get through it, then when you're ready go back and restart as necessary to get to the others. enjoy! >:)
#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 5 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 5 spoilers#i know i said non-spoilery and yet i'm tagging it anyway#we are a study in contrasts tonight#i will take this opportunity to mention some spoilers though#because it turns out i really do love silver having a good ol breakdown#loved it in the early days of 7 when he was talking to malleus at the statues#loved it even more when he got stuck in the funk and proceeded to just lose it completely#man barely emotes for 6.5 episodes and then next thing you know he's full-on screaming at a baby#and i'm mcloving every mcsecond of it#toto š#(disclaimer that i'm just assuming the chapters are lining up with how it was released in jp)#(i THINK that's how it's been going so far but. crucially. i am very bad at paying attention)#(this is my apology in advance if they cut it off at like...7-74 or something)#(surprise! by chapter 5 they meant 5 chapters!)
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Chilchuckās wife and family - Facts, theories and headcanons
I want to keep this as a sort of masterpost on Chilās family situation if I can, but if we get a lot of information on it (in the additional content that Kui is gonna make) that renders this more or less useless I probably wonāt update this anymore. If you find other crumbs of information or I've said anything factually incorrect please do tell me! I'm planning to edit this as we go since I want to compile most if not all of the information and pages we get about this topic on here, and if I just wait to post it perfection paralysis will nip this in the bud. It focuses a lot on Chilchuck and Chilchuck's wife relationships, but the daughters and Chilchuck's own parents and siblings are talked about as well.
CW/disclaimer: This post talks about messy family dynamics and such, thereās no outright abuse Iām implying anywhere, but alcoholism and neglect are mentioned and discussed. Iām not here to demonize anyone! I love every character involved and I just want to theorize about the topic as a layered issue that involves complex characters. Also, I try to use very transparent language as to when Iām citing or analyzing canon information and when Iām giving a personal interpretation or headcanoning.
Abbreviated table of content:
Timeline and circumstances
Possible strains on the marriage
The hair question. Confirmation on what his wife looks like?
Other family dynamic & post-canon theories & headcanons
Parenting style + misc in a reblog addition (new)
Letās start with the facts, shall we?
Timeline and circumstances
So, we see that Chilchuck and his wife are childhood friends, and they married at 13 years old and had two children in that same year. Since half-foots reach the age of maturity at 14, they seem to be what we'd call teen parents. It's a bit debatable though, since Laios says the age of maturity for tallmen (humans) is 16 instead of 18 or even 21, so what's considered to be the age of maturity is a cultural thing and isn't fully reliable when we want to compare to our irl understanding and what developmental stage it perfectly aligns with. Also, during the succubus chapter Chichuck says that his daughters were all now of age to be independent, and Chilchuck's wife leaves to live with Flertom, which would mean that Puckpatti was independent at age 10 and lived away from home as well (since she's the third/last daughter). Ah yes another interesting thing to note is that we donāt know the pregnancy periods for the races, since Meijack and Flertom were born the same year. It could be tight timing or it could be something else, but I donāt think theyāre twins, they keep talking about them being the oldest and the middle child, them being twins is definitely the sort of thing that would get mentioned.
Him starting working on the island notably happens just one year before his wife leaves him. I don't remember the other instances of him mentioning it though I feel like it happened, but since he started working at the Island's dungeon, working as a dungeon diver and then forming the half-foot guild, that probably means he started being away for longer periods of time and having a less reliable schedule on when he'd be coming back home. It is said that he went back home somewhat regularly iirc, though he usually ends up sleeping at the half-foot guild quarters. I'm not sure if Kahka Brud is also where he lived with his family, or just since he rented someplace new after she left him. He and his timeline state that he was born in a small village "northeast of the island", which he left at 14 one year after being married, but it isnāt stated where they go after so itās unsure how far his home was from the island if it wasnāt in Kahka Brud. We donāt know when his father died so if that factors in to him leaving his village we have no clue.
Chil also says that he hasnāt seen or spoken with his wife nor daughters since the incident, which would mean he's gone 4 years without contact with his family during the events of canon. I don't remember if Chilchuck is said to exchange letters with his daughters, beyond the initial one from Flertom saying her mother was with her, so I've been assuming he hasn't.
He also says "For about ten years Iāve been travelling to dungeons in various areas and doing work" which considering heās turning 29 that year would mean he started around 19 years old? The panel also gives details what sort of work heās been doing. Either way itās confirmed that Chilchuck travels for his work a lot.
In addition, since Chilchuck has the seal of approval of the bicorn + says so himself, he has always stayed faithful to his wife. So that means that unless he's had previous adventures before he was 14 and got married, he's never dated anyone else in his life, nor had romantic or sexual encounters/experiences with others in his 16 years of marriage right up to canon (year 514). I feel itās safe to say that itās implied that during all these years starting from when they were married, Chilchuck's wife was a housewife whose main job was taking care of the kids and the house.
Marcille's take on what happened is unreliable, as Kui even takes the time to directly say so in the Adventurer's Bible, so I don't want to use it as a baseline even if it offers some insight on what could have happened (her feeling out of place, leaving to test his love, etc etc).
What Chilchuck says seems to be accurate though since it pertains to his perspective of the events! Unlike how Marcille's theory flows, Chilchuck was aware that something was off before she left since she "suddenly fell into a bad mood".
Piecing everything together, my theory: Chilchuck and his wife were childhood friends and have always always sort of danced around of each other, the classic movie love story with childhood sweethearts, until they ultimately confessed and got together. While dating, Chilchuck's wife becomes pregnant and they're both unequiped to deal with the situation but decide to marry, either a bit forced in order to cover it up or hopeful to make the best of it. They make it work as they can and Chilchuck works to provide for the family while she takes care of the home and the kids, which means that even though he's not a deadbeat father (he cares, he was at least a bit involved in their lives and raising them since for example he knows how to braid hair after all) he ends up being rather absent from home. It only gets worse over the years, especially when Chilchuck starts working further and further away from home and coming home less often, and since Puckpatti left home Chilchuck's wife is alone at home most of the time, never knowing when Chilchuck would be coming and if to prepare the table for two instead of one, or even if he'd be coming back at all since his work is dangerous. The humdrum and lifestyle would get to her, they've grown into different people in these 10 years of marriage and she doesn't feel the spark or feels valued & seen anymore, so she leaves. He feels confused and betrayed which turns into anger so he doesnāt try to reach out and mend things, and with the way he says theyāre estranged and he moves away I think heās avoiding his family somewhat.
Possible strains on the marriage
Tfw all your daughters are independent and your husband is gone to work almost all the time and he barely even tells you that he loves you, is there even a reason to stay together anymore? Every day itās just you and an empty house and chores to do, wondering if you have to cook for one or for two today.
Alright itās analysis and theorizing time! Although there are more facts down in this post if you care about Chilchuck's wife's appearajce, Chilchuck's parents & siblings or the kids, the essential facts so to speak were all in the first part.
We don't see Chilchuck showing any discontent with his wife through the manga so I'm assuming that he was content in his marriage, happy with his wife, and with how he stayed faithful to her even in the 4 years after she left (and never stopped calling her his wife. Which also shows a weird stubborn attitude since he wasnāt planning on reaching out to her and mend things but Iāll put aside the possible entitlement/coping mechanism for another time) I think he truly loved her and still does. Since she left him and not the reverse, I'm putting a lot of emphasis on his wife's side of things. Especially since we do see how Chilchuck is at work quite a bit but never see how he is at home. Iāll be sounding harsh towards Chil on this but heās pretty much the only party we can criticize since we donāt know her, I still side with Chil on the leaving issue though, heās justifiably pissed if she left without a word what the hell even.
Alcoholism and health
Chilchuckās favorite food as listed in the Adventurerās Bible is beer, and itās shown that heās prone to drinking until drunk whenever he gets the opportunity to. A cheerful drunk is still a drunk. (Extra reading: if interested here's a oneshot FMA fanfic by a friend that goes in depth about this very topic that really illustrates what sort of family dynamic that can bring about. Itās not dunmeshi but itās a good read.) Chilchuck is also canonically underweight, starving himself for a strict weight management diet (Extra reading: you can look at a short compilation post about that here). Did you know under eating makes one irritable? And this is on top of Chilchuck sometimes/regularly coming back home with "horrible injuries", since Marcille guesses it and he acts like sheās dead right on everything that far.
Itās rough seeing someone you love mistreat themselves, not being able to shake them out of that and having to stay to see them wasting away. Itās rough seeing them put their work above their own health. Putting their work even above their family. Putting alcohol over family time. It's not that simple, but there's always that element when asking someone you love to tone it down with things like alcohol or such, that if they refuse, then it feels like they value that thing more than they value your feelings or opinions. That they love alcohol more than they love you.
You know how thereās often this thing of "Well Iām providing everything for this family, so whatever else that I do you donāt get to complain." I do think that itās something theyād have argued over a little bit, not that heād say it that way, but the essence of it. "Chilchuck, youāre drinking a lot of alcohol often, Iām worried maybe you should ease up on it." "This is what I want to do in my free time, give me a break.", "Dear, your mood gets worse when youāre hungry, I really think you should stop dieting-" "Would you rather I die in a trap because I was too heavy?", "Honey I donāt like when you work so far away from home for so long" "Well what else can I do, do you have any better idea?". That sort of thing. Even if not being passive agressive or snappy, or even spoken upon, these situations can cause tension, or a feeling of powerlessness or imbalance in the relationship. Although I personally feel like they were both rather passive in their relationship (thus having little arguments), which itself can be a problem since yes they let each other live but they grew more distant and less communicative as a result, more on that later. Content and tolerating, rather than happy and fulfilled.
Workaholism and long distance
Spending a lot (or even a majority?) of time away from home for years and years obviously can strain relationships in many ways. Besides becoming more distant, both with his wife and his daughters, there's just that side that maybe you grow apart or you end up not knowing them all that well. Like the fictional dialogue excerpts I wrote just above, the way Chilchuck puts work above most things can by itself be the source of a lot of unhealthy habits and strains that could not only hurt himself but his relationships too. Devoted doesnāt mean attentive, even if Chilchuck 100% devotes himself to only her romantically and works in the goal to support her that doesnāt transfer into being there for her, even when he physically is.
An absent father isn't necessarily a deadbeat father, but an absent father is absent. And alright, we donāt know what his schedule was like exactly, but he was busy and traveled around, I think itās fair to assume that if we were to make comparisons itād be like parents irl who are often on work trips. We don't know what Chilchuck's wife's social circle is like, but regardless of how big or small or supportive it is it would be easy to get lonely I think. Besides raising the kids undoubtedly falling more onto her shoulders as well. Managing a household can be very hard and tiring even when not alone, I can imagine she felt like she missed the support of Chilchuck either as help or comfort oftentimes. We know very little about her, but I don't get the impression that she'd build up resentment over it except maybe her āfalling into a bad moodā, but exhaustion? Absolutely.
Itās also implied imo, even beyond Chil not often being at home, that they rarely go out together. And that could very well be part of why she was mad after the outing. In Marcilleās theory she says that her wife felt out of place amongst all the cool adventurer coworkers, and if itās a rare time that they go out together and it was supposed to be about her meeting his coworkersā¦ I feel like what could have happened was that she felt out of place yes, and even moreso if she ended up not participating in conversations much because of it and no one really seemed to care, and the evening was all Chilchuck and his coworkers chatting it up as always and she was an outsider, if she sort of just faded into the background, if it felt like nothing would have changed wether she was there or not... If she felt like her presence didnāt matter on this special outing that rarely happened, it could have been the straw that broke the camelās back for her to want to leave, definitely. He finally comes back after a long work travel and they finally go out and this is what their quality time is like? The outing that was supposed to be about her & them both ended up being all about him, and once more she was supposed to just orbit around him and his life without complaint or her own selfish wants like a devoted wife. With how Chil said that she got mad "all of a sudden" on the way home and he didnāt know why, plus that he was probably drunk (which may very well have made the whole thing worse), I feel like it supports that he didnāt pay her much attention during the evening, not that Iām assigning him ill intent at all, Iām sure that for him, it was a casual and fun night out and he didnāt think it'd been unpleasant or alienating for her.
That night
And all of this speculation in order to try and figureā¦ What happened? Why did she leave? I've already gone into it a fair bit, but this is where I discuss it fully in depth.
We canāt rely on Marcilleās theory. Neither in the why she felt so out of place enough to want to leave, nor if her intention when leaving was to "test" him. I definitely agree that the reason why she left is layered and that the night/outing was the straw that broke the camelās back more than the cause perse, but besides that itās hard to say how much of it was impulsive and how much was because nothing else had worked to fix their relationship, or how long she'd been thinking of maybe leaving him.
Personally my favorite interpretation isn't that she found herself to be boring surrounded with Chilchuck's adventurer coworkers, or her reason for leaving is super centered around insecurity and if Chilchuck even loves her anymore, but that she sees how rich and eventful Chilchuck's life is and at the same time realizes how stagnant her own life has been. Chilchuck has adventurers for coworkers and they go out to bars and spend evenings together chatting it up, while she always does the same house chores every day and waits, and wonders, uncertain about when her huband would come back, and waits some more. She has a sort of passive role in her own life that gets pulled in one way or another by the people around her at their whims and needs, which is also a recurring theme in the manga: having a passive role in your own life, or a role that's devoted to others. Like with Falin who's always following her parents' directives or following Laios around, being the party's healer and eventually sacrificing herself for Laios and Marcille (she also doesn't seem to think much of marriage, as seen with Shuro proposing to her and her not having answered yet, which fits with how she was supposed to have an arranged marriage in her hometown too; a loveless marriage isn't something alarming to her). Izutsumi too, whose whole arc is about her gaining freedom and figuring out how to use this empowerment for herself and what she wants.
So she'd sit there, not knowing anyone except Chilchuck and not being able to follow their conversations about dungeons, and think about how this is a world she's totally apart from. How she knows so little of the world compared to him. She'd realize that while she's always waiting for Chilchuck to come home, dedicated to him and their family, Chilchuck's world doesn't stop and end at where and when he sees her, that while she's waiting he's living and experiencing things and being self-fulfilled. She's so passive and devoted and her tasks seem almost senseless now that the house is empty except for her, and in that time he's formed half-foot unions and she understands so little of what his life has become outside of her sight. This isn't a diss on Chilchuck or his attitude, I just think that it'd make her ponder about happiness and lifestyles, what's worth it and if she's content with her life. I think she'd find that her and Chilchuck aren't on the same page anymore, and probably they don't communicate much or even that they don't know how to communicate with each other anymore.
Other factors
They really do seem to be on different pages and not know how to communicate with each other well, since for example Chilchuck thinks that on the way back home she "suddenly" fell into a bad mood and seemingly left it alone, or otherwise they didn't talk until he knew what was wrong. Or like how she left and Chilchuck never reached out to her to talk or mend things, just like she never reached out either. According to Marcille it could be that she wanted to "test his love" and see if he'd even care if she was gone, but Chilchuck just got angry that she left like that and never reached out to her, so if that's true they definitely have incompatible expectations or ways to deal with things like that. Maybe she thought of leaving as something he should react to by trying to win her back, but Chilchuck did nothing and let her do her thing, and tbh if that were me I'd also have waited on her to reach out because I figure out that if someone leaves me they want space from me idk. He seems to be rather passive when it comes to interpersonal relationships and how they can mess up, made an analysis post here that talks about it, so the way he reacted by not reacting doesn't feel surprising, maybe she didn't know/remember that part of him, or wanted to shake him out of that tendency. He has no clue why she left, and there are just so many misunderstandings here that it's impossible to know what happened and how she felt and what she wanted for the future.
Also, weāre shown that younger Chilchuck, when he started dungeon crawling, is much more "innocent" and optimistic, less closed off on himself and bitter, and maybe he hasn't even developed his famous "sarcastic retorts" and "abusive remarks" yet as is plastered on all his character introductions and stats. Chilchuck has definitely changed a lot over the years, and some would argue not for the better. Staying with someone for so long has implications that they'll change and be different of course, but signing up for marriage with someone can still leave you questioning that choice decades down the line when they're so different
We get to see his freckles fade in sync with his corruption arc /j
Tfw when you canāt recognize the man you fell in love with.
The hair question
Edit 1/13/2024 leak!!!! Things arenāt officially confirmed but this is a safe bet. You can still read this section to see my reasoning to thinking she had black hair prior to this tho haha
It's not all that important rationally, but the community's been split on the topic: is Chilchuck's wife blonde or not?
Kui highlights Chilchuck being attracted to blondes a grand total of three times, and many assume that his wife is blonde due to this. However, the only vision we see of Chilchuck's wife is Marcille imagining herself as a halfling, so it's up for debate! Flertom has black hair, and that's mostly been the key clue that has people arguing.
I'm not an expert in genetics but black hair is a dominant gene, but it also doesn't mean a black haired parent can't have a brown haired kid, or that two brown haired parents can't have a kid with black hair. As long as one of the parents have it in their genetic code from somewhere in their family tree, it's possible, if not maybe unlikely.
People have been taking Flertom having black hair as evidence that Chilchuck's wife has black hair, but it could be Chilchuck that has the gene and could pass it on. Although...
That seems unlikely. We don't know what Chilchuck's elder brother's hair color was, and his elder sister does have a darker brown hair color, but in the case their parents had black hair or the gene for it, it seems highly unlikely if not impossible for the dominant black hair gene to miss this many amount of time in the gene russian roulette game.
And so I shall now call a witness to the stand, and you reader shall be the judgeā¦ Dandan.
You know, this guy? He makes appearances throughout the whole manga, but only has one spoken line in an easy to brush over flashback iirc. He's most often seen hanging out around Chilchuck and other half-foots, but it's unsure how far back he and Chilchuck go.
Now. Remember how Chilchuck and his wife are childhood friends? What if, and hear me out, what if Dandan is related to her. A cousin, or a sibling. Or maybe he's Chilchuck's cousin, even, if we go the reverse route.
The chapter cover
Look at the chapter cover below! We see each member of the main party at a table that's meaningful to them and their history, mostly showing themes of family, community and routine. Laios and Falin sharing a meal by themselves, Marcille at a meal in the cafeteria at the magic academy, Senshi by himself cooking in the dungeon, Izutsumi with Inutade at the Nakamoto household, and... Chilchuck, surrounded by much more mysterious and unknown characters and surroundings.
The only face we see besides the infant is a young one on the left which strikes me as looking a ton like Chilchuck! I doubt it's Meijack or Puckpatti, or someone else, especially since Chilchuck left his hometown pretty early which must make family gatherings harder (and routine is implied with the othersā panels). If it were Meijack I think Kui would have drawn it to more closely match her too, and have her usual freckles. I also don't think it's just Chilchuck and his own family, since if that's Chilchuck the only sibling with black hair he could have is his elder brother and the infant in the middle is clearly, well an infant.
My thoughts are that the table is shared with family friends, or at least members of the community. The elderly person implies that either there's extended family or itās a gathering, especially if Chilchuck's grandparents don't live with them. Community is implied to be very important with half-foots imo, and if Chilchuck is from a small hometown like he says that would surprise me even less. Childhood friends are often brought together as friends because of circumstances, such as proximity or their families being friends! Doesn't that kid almost off-panel on the right, with a Flertom-like hairstyle and black hair, look to be the same age as the Chilchuck on the left? š
Alsoā¦ Notice the dragon plush sheās holding?
Passed down from mom to daughter? The "most likely belonged to his daughters" is interesting too
If he is related, Dandan could be the infant. I suppose he doesn't end up mattering all that much in the end if you theorize that the Flertom-like kid is his wife on its own though haha. But wether or not you think that this is convincing enough, it's all we have on the topic for now.
Ah yes! Lastly, I've seen the sentiment around that his wife should be blonde, that Chilchuck's taste for blondes, if not the thing that brought them together, should be an acquired taste from loving his wife. That if that's not the case, then Chilchuck's type being blondes is either out of place or insuting or unromantic, etc etc. I can't help but disagree! I think, especially with how Chilchuck and his wife are domestic and all about knowing each from a young age, familiarity etc etc, that it would be so sweet if she wasn't his type! Loving someone so deeply, even if they aren't an idealized type... Which is a common theme/story & character beat in Dungeon Meshi.
Family dynamic theories
Meijack is the most capable, takes after her father the most, seems to have her own business as a locksmith but has a stable steady life. Flertom is the most social, she works at a tavern which seems stable and is ambitious with marriage plans, she has a caring side to her since she sent her dad a handmade gift. Puckpatti is the most upbeat, though she has the most unstable lifestyle, seemingly doing odd jobs.
His daughters do seem well adjusted, which encourages me in that their family seems amicable on the whole and (at the very least) decently functional. We donāt hear what they think of Chilchuck but presumably none of them are on bad terms with him or each other. Flertom does say that "half-foot men are stingy" which, gee, I wonder what half-foot man would have made taught her that- though it does also seem to be a racial stereotype in general, with how for example Namari also says to "steer clear from stores with half-foot clerks".
Flertom seems to be the only one who reached out after their mother left (the only one who's mentioned to have done so at least), and it's because she was the one who took in her mother. Itās not implied that they exchange letters regularly too iirc, it possibly was the only letter they've exchanged since then. I wonder if the daughters even know the full story, if their mother told them all about it or very little. Maybe some are pretty out of the loop, or more distant.
It strikes me that they don't seem to be very close. We're not shown anything that leads us to believe they don't like their father, but I think they're so used to him being absent for work that such distance is normal for them and they don't really long for a deeper relationship or to see him often. They were already out of the house and it seems like they didn't see each other much at that time either so for them it would be just a bit less than the regular amount of Dad time. It's been 4 years Chilchuck what are you doing... But yeah! From what we see they seem mostly unaffected, almost indifferent, not that we can truly tell. I imagine Flertom is the one most attached to Chilchuck with how she sent him a handmade cowl, and I think he rubbed off the most on Meijack teachings wise (besides her attitude, sheās also the one who still wears braids, and we see that Chilchuck braids hair). It makes sense, since they're oldest, and on the contrary I think Puckpatti is the one that knows her father the least. It'd fit the timeline with him working away more while she grew up imo.
Wouldn't it be interesting then that she's the one that Chilchuck says is carefree, in the official translation "doesn't treat life real seriously"? That she's the most optimistic, the most go-with-the-flow, out of the bunch? To me that sounds like a result from her being the youngest and Chil being the most often at work, thus her getting raised by her mother without as much involvement from Chil. Far be it from me to say Chilchuck would raise his daughters to be unhappy btw, not at all, we just all know what down-to-earth values he wants others to have so he doesn't have to worry about them.
Althoughā¦ Puckpatti spotted?? Seems like he wants to stop her from buying something? His heart meter for her is full <3 (Note: Iāve seen it be argued that this could be his wife. I disagree, since the "stop them" and way that the long haired one is off-center compared to everyone else gives the sense that itās many of his daughters, and the fact that itās styled after a dating sim doesnāt mean itās romantic love as we see with the others. Otherwise imagine being her wife and he tells you not to buy stuff when you go shopping together rip)
Headcanons time:
When naming the daughters, together they choose a pool of names theyād like but only one has the final say, and they alternate between who that is. Chilchuck sticks around more near the end of her pregnancies, and he hasnāt missed any of their births. I donāt have any opinions on who named who right now, but there could be some interesting stuff to theorize with Puckpatti, like them taking extra care picking the name together because they settled on her being their last daughter for fluff, or it was supposed to be Chilchuck but he was so busy that he ended up not picking in time and she was the one to name her for angst.
Actually scratch that I have a new theory : What if itās actually customary for each parent to pick one half of their half-foot kidās name? So then each would have chosen half of each girlās nameā¦ And this could be why Chil calls Puckpatti Patti instead of Puck which is her first name, because heās stubborn since Patti was his pick lmaoooo. Pattipuck doesnāt have the same ring to it alas, his wife was so right
Chilchuck liked to do activities with the girls when they were young. He's not opposed to relaxing at home with them perse, but he likes to do workshops with stuff like arts & crafts to develop their agility some. I don't think they'd do much outings to places like restaurants or theatres for money reason, and I don't think Chilchuck is much of an outdoors type, but he could accompany them to nice fields to play in, or in winter places to play in snow and sled, and organize some activities at home. He's not home very often so when he is he likes to take it easy as a break from work and values the time he gets with his family.
Chilchuck would sometimes work from home as a locksmith, say, unlocking a chest for a customer. In those times, Meijack would take interest and watch him work, even handing him the tools he needs as he goes. In this way, Chilchuck taught her a lot about the work of a locksmith over time. He's also the one that would oil door hinges or do renovation around the house- when he's available.
Like the plushies under his table in his home that we see in illustrations, Chilchuck has a lot of mementos from his daughter (and his wife) he keeps around. Sometimes they take a bothersome amount of place, but throwing anything out isn't something he's seriously willing to consider. Flertom's the most artistic and she used to help with sewing clothes back together, so he has a cheap ceramic mug painted by her when she was really young and small embroideries around.
Imo Meijack would be the most distant in the present. Flertom makes efforts for her parents and is pretty involved, and Puckpatti's distance is more out of being a bit airheaded and being busy + not having a great grasp on time or what's a normal amount of family contact, but Meijack's the one who knowingly and intentionally keeps some distance. I think sheād be the least optimistic about their family situation, and although sheād be hopeful when Chilchuck reached out to them again sheād be a but hesitant. I think Meijack would hold some grudges, being the one most critical of their parenting, both grateful to her dad for working so hard for them and saddened that he wasn't in their life more. Since Flertom was born in the same year I think itās possible that Meijack was pushed aside a bit to take care of the younger baby more, out of necessity rather than lack of love. Her mom probably needed a lot of help around the house too. Flertom wasnāt blind either, and she cared about & noticed her momās emotional states, but sheās on the whole more hopeful and forgiving.
This is my most far fetched one but it is a hc after all, but I think it'd be interesting if one of them had food hoarding tendencies/stress. I like to think it's Flertom, because she's the middle child and would get told that her older sister and younger sister are "growing and need the food" so she wouldn't be allowed to take as much refill or such, add that to them not having much money to frivolously spend on food and that makes a kid who's worried about not eating to her hunger and tends to be possessive over food (I'm projecting). Differential treatment is inevitable in families with many siblings, and it can manifest in small or big ways, maybe they realize it maybe they don't. Working in a tavern has helped eased that tendency of her though, and while she does diet a bit she always leaves a meal feeling satisfied.
When they were younger, Flertom was a real firecracker, loud and spirited with some troublemaking tendencies! She was the daughter that got in trouble & got scolded the most. You can still see slivers of it now that sheās an adult, but sheās much more poised and diligent. She has much more acquaintances than friends, but she has a couple of best friends and usually gets along well with most people. Puckpatti was always a bit head in the cloud, very kind if not gullible, and tended to make friends somewhat easily but didnāt keep them for long, preferring to keep meeting new people and not keeping in touch well. She isnāt super talkative but tends to ramble when she does. Meijack is very introverted, she has more trouble making friends, she has a good handful though they donāt meet up often, her friendships tend to last and sheās close to them. Sheās grown more confident over the years, less repressed and more quiet. Meijack as the big sister tended to be the listener for her younger sisters who had more social mishaps. Flertom has dated once before and it only cemented to her that she was going to have very high standards from then on.
Meijack wears thigh-high boots because she hates when sand, dirt or snow gets in her shoes. She wears practical clothing but avoids anything frilly or flashy. Puckpatti also dresses practically, but she does enjoy pretty clothes, itās more out of necessity and due to not having enough money to indulge. Flertom has a social stable job and she loves prettying herself up (especially as sheās in search of a husband) so sheās the one who gets the most and nicest fashionable clothes and accessories.
Chilchuck is hinted to have had a rather dysfunctional family himself (alcoholic father, distant siblings, etc). So he doesnāt really have the best model on how to raise someone and such. I imagine it was a sort of neglectful home situation, where the kids are encouraged to be independent. If they didnāt have to work or help around much, then free range parenting sort of thing. We do see how the family has full and warm feasts, where someone cleans his mouth with a rag, so itās not like he didnāt have a caring circle or a tragic childhood though! I donāt remember if itās explicitely stated, but heās heavily implied to having grown up poor, as most half-foots, and I just think it's the hardened hardworking family type of childhood where just like he does with others they instill somewhat harsh life lessons in him, which in turn encourages him to indulge in the simple pleasures of life like alcohol and sex, or at least womenās beauty and crass jokes. We do see he seems more optimistic when he's younger in flashbacks, so a bunch of his harsh view on the world is still likely learned and earned rather than taught. I still think he inherited many flawed views from how his father acted, like his attitude about excessive drinking not being a big deal and worth it. That work hard play hard, enjoy life die young mentality he has, shown mostly in the "alcohol" section of his Adventurer's Bible profile, could very well be partly a result of the general poverty half-foot communities are that he grew in as well, like how he doesn't hope for things to be as best as they could be and contends with good enough. As far as I remember, his mother is never mentioned, but I doubt it implies she was out of the picture. She was probably a regular sort of mother that took care of the home as well and was still around when his father died. It looks like thereās a good age gap between one sibling to the next, that could be interesting to dig into too.
A part of Chilchuckās character is that he takes responsibility for safety and actions of people around him and is very often looking out for them to not do faux-pas wether socially or literally with stepping onto traps. The way he says "Iāve got three people to think of here" makes me think thatās also how heād think about having to provide for his family, and that could be a source of stress and insecurity for him. Caring for others is a pretty integral part of his character and we see time and time again that his family is very important to him, in any case.
Post-canon
This pic has so much to say!! Itās the āthank you for readingā double page spread where theyāre going to a big dining table at the castle with Laios and the main gang. First family gathering in 4 years perhaps?! Iāll say, not feeling very hopeful that his wife isnāt in this, not even implied to be just off-panel with a hand or anythingā¦ I imagine before this he still talked to them at least a bit and figured their family situation out, but I think this is still in the early stages of reconnecting. Haha imagine being one of them and receiving a letter saying "Hi itās been a whileā¦ I want to introduce you to my ex-coworker the king and his friends, you up for that?" I donāt want to reconsider all my hcs for this yet, but this pic does seemingly show an eagerness from all the daughters to reunite and reconnect! Meijackās could be seen as more hesitant, but I think itās just awkwardness from meeting so many new people, of high status no less. Chilchuck does seem awkward and somewhat self-conscious though, and while that could be just from say Marcille and the others meeting his daughters and him not knowing how to act, I think that also shows that Chilchuck is unsure how to act around his daughters too. Canāt blame him, Iād be stressed too. Anyways, the daughters are all dressed up! Puckpatti even brought flowers! And I doubt itās just for Senshi, or just to be in with the king. Oh also also, Puckpatti chides Meijack here, seemingly on manners?, so that implies new/different family dynamics there~
We know with the succubus chapter that he does plan on reaching out to his wife again and shooting his shot, and when Marcille was dungeon lord he told her she could help think of a plan to make up with her together at which point Marcille showered him in gifts and flowers intended for her and his daughters. So we do know that whatever happens and however it happens, Chilchuck definitely will at least reach out to her to win her back or worse case scenario get closure on the situation.
-
These are his plans before itās revealed that the Island isā¦ Well, not an island but the golden kingdom, so the news that Laios is king and that might have changed them a bit, but I think heās still gonna stick around to help with the half-foot guild for a while.
My personal ideal post-canon Chilchuck life is that after around a year or two of helping around in the golden kingdom, especially regarding half-foot working rights, he gets his shop and finally settles down. He prioritized the whole half-foot guild because there are changes to attend to and people to help, but also used that to procrastinate a bit on getting in touch with his wife again. He does send a letter though, and when she replies they then meet face to face. They explain how it was like on their end, their grievances and their feelings, and they do reconcile. Butā¦ Itās been 4 years and his wife has frankly moved on. Sheād rather they stay as friends, and Chilchuck has mixed feelings on it but is ultimately fine with it. He was halfway resigned to not reconciling with his wife in canon after all. But no longer do they have cut contact! They get together with the girls for the holidays and the ambiance is nice! He starts exchanging letters more regularly. He also gets a second family of clingy asses with Izutsumi and the main gang and so though he lives alone in his shop heās well surrounded and well loved, and his daughters visit to check up on him every so often.
I really like theā¦ Maturity of Chilchuckās plotline, if that makes sense? To me the ending that fits the most is him and his wife reconciling, but not getting back together. I like that they could still be adults about it and at least amicable even after divorce, and that that wouldnāt be treated as a tragic ending. In the end, they were childhood friends and teenage parents, they rushed things a bit and I genuinely think theyāre just not that compatible. If not then, at least having it be a gradual process, getting back together and making it work until theyāre truly comforatble with each other. Destroy the relationship to better build it again stronger!
Although, his arc in the manga is to allow himself to form connections and be optimistic, which would fit well with him and his wife getting back together. I def think Chil would get healthier post-canon which could fix the issues they had in their relationship though. Like for one he starts eating more, which improves mood & irritability & health, and also after the whole half-foot guild he plans to settle down with a shop so it wouldnāt be long distance or unstable anymore which would definitely give his wife some peace of mind. If they still do some long distance at first while he gets the half-foot guild stable, itād be really cute if he sent pressed flowers with his letters to herā¦ That could make a nice fic concept, like over time all the pressed flowers and exchanged letters hehe (oh shit thatās a nice title)
My post-canon timeline is Chilchuck lives a nice life living alone in his house except his friends all visit him and care and even tho he likes living alone itās also bittersweet and every corner of his life is haunted by mementos of the ones he loves and the moments he had with them. But then itās also like the shared duty of everyone to pass by his shop when they can and keep the old man company and sometimes that means many people come at the same time like if both Meijack and Marcille came the same day~ Cozy life, no regrets except a lil regrets still. Thatās it thatās all I want.
Misc
I didnāt know where to put this, so new category time! Family truly is a central theme of Chilchuckās character. His reaction to learning more about how life gets made is so awed by the wonder of the world. Life indeedā¦
The implication of this page is that Chil didnāt know about the science side of how procreation works, though of course he did know about the practical side of it. This is speculation, and we have no clue how widespread the information of how reproduction scientifically works lol, but I think itās fair to think that half-footsā education especially in smaller communities is handled by the parent, school of life style, or if there are schools then the education is very general and it probably ends early. I think this is supported by how for example half-footsā jobs weāve seen are based on experience rather than knowledge, like being a locksmith. Of course any job has its fair share of specialized knowledge to learn, but jobs you learn on the fly pretty well. This sort of dynamic contrasts a lot against elves many tallmen communities, like with the magic academy, where education and knowledge are valued almost above experience, this is what the mandrake chapter was all about after all. Poorer communities tend to have poorer education systems as well irl, itās a whole issue.
So I already said my piece about his wife not being blonde and it being nice and romantic because literally you donāt need someone to be a beauty ideal to love them and thatās fine and normal and even more romantic imo. But!! I do have an headcanon, now that his wifeās appearance is all but explicitly confirmed. While their hair is blonde, yes their hair is wavy and the āmainā one has deep-set eyes, not unlike his wife! Now this is a āwhich came first the egg or the chickenā question, but while most people seem to be assuming that he got with his wife because she was his type, since theyāre childhood friends I feel like itās his love for his wife that shaped his preferences in that deparment. Like ok he loves golden hair and hers is black, but isnāt it so much more romantic that he has so much love and devotion for his wife and has stared lovingly at it so much over the years, that itād become his ideal? He loves her eyes <3
Conclusion
Reminder that Iāve got more observations and tidbits compiled in a reblog addition now.
More stuff I should workshop for the masterpost:
Compile more info on Chilchuck's father and his other family. Edit: I compiled all I had pretty neatly here in a speculation post, but thereās no other concrete piece of info other than what Iāve covered here sadly. Same with stuff like Chilchuckās past work schedule and exchanged letters, there seems to be no other bits of evidence, exceptā¦
On the chapter cover and extra where heās in his basement room we can see one letter and a few papers across his desk. Maybe family letters? Wether his daughters or relatives. Seems too few to me, could just as well be job descriptions, but truly who knows, itās hopeful.
Excellent analysis on half-foot culture here by a friend that I should read and incorporate the good info into my own meta~
And thus I leave you with a lil web weaving I made about Chil & his wifeās relationship~ And this is where Iād put panels of Chilchuckās wifeā¦ IF THERE WERE ANY
Should we even call Chilchuck's wife Mrs. Tims... We don't know dunmeshi marrital traditions though, and half-foot already have somewhat complex naming conventions... I hate that we don't really know if the daughters' last names are Chils or Chilz. Although that seems to be a japanese to english translation issue, since japanese used the suffix zu and not su, likely to imitate the english S sound at the end of a word. Oh yeah the last names change each generation, thatās odd right? But in english it sounds like saying Chilās, like, [father]ās, so I think this also supports how half-foots communities tend to be tightly knit and live in the present, for them to be like "Ooh so youāre [father]ās little one eh? I know who that is and this is insightful as to who your family is to me!". Icelandās a place where last names are like this, though I donāt know about pros and cons of it in that context. Itās called a patronymic.
Ah and I have a bittersweet spotify playlist about her and Chil too, here if ya want. Thatās it the post is over
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#spoilers#chilchuck tims#delicious in dungeon#chilchuckās wife#chilchuckās family#Tims family#puckpatti#meijack#flertom#Analysis#Meta#Despite my best tries I am not omnipresent it's always fun when piecing together these topics is a community effort!!#please do build upon this if you have anything to add#but yeah editing is up in the air. I'll probably be adding stuff maybe even cutting stuff out#this is a giant post i am slightly overwhelmed#Kui puts so much importance in details it's incredible. It truly feels worthwhile to get into the weeds#We support chilchuckās wife on this blog#I covered how stressful her life could have been a bit in my Grind Me Down Sweetly fic funnily enough if ya want to give it a read. It has#Daughters mentions too hehe. And my post-canon marchil take#Oh also if thereās already theory and compilation posts out there about this iām down to link them in or smth. I havenāt seen it done but#If itās been then iām very interested in reading & seeing#Apparently chilchuck being an absent dad is a heated debated topic. Oops#Pls do not murder meā¦ Peace and love in the dungeon meshi fandom? Heās my second fave have mercy on this humble stan#This is 7k words btw. Pls do pick and choose what youāre interested in or skim or take breaks or anything
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