#completely helpless

[arrowmaker15]

(discussing fashion)

Jason: I have the best aesthetic. Hell, my first appearance terrified criminals. A red helmet strikes fear into people.

Dick: Maybe your first outfit, sure. But when I was Batman? That pill helmet and go-go boots wasn't scaring anyone. All of mine were cool and flashy.

Jason: Oh, sure. But what, Discowing sucked.

Dick, gasping: You take that back! That suit was amazing.

Jason: It was garbage-

Dick: If I was Batman-

Cass: Boys.

*they both look at her*

Cass: My Batgirl suit.

Jason:

Dick:

Jason: She has a point-

Dick: That suit is terrifying-

Cass: *smiles*

[black-fairy3]

guy’s i’m such an idiot…there’s this really cute white boy that works at the mall in my area and i see him like almost every time i go in there and this time i felt like the vibes were there and we were kinda talking but i’m just so ughh. i don’t know how to flirt and be cute and i just felt like i was just so fucking stupid ughhhhggh and i swore he was going to ask for my number or something or even my name but he didn’t and i left just disappointed. i know i could have asked him for his but i was around my family and i’m just an awkward ass persons i literally just don’t know how ughhhhg!!!!!!!

[pactw]

"i didn't expect the eggs to be such a big deal!" paraphrasing, but like. quackity. how. how??

the server said, "okay, here's a baby. no, really, an actual baby: fragile, new to the world, and alone. not only that, it's your baby. they're hungry, they're stumbling, they're trying so hard to live against all the impossible odds. and since they're your baby, you are the only one who can keep them alive. if you don't care for them, they'll die. it will be of neglect, plain and simple, because they're a baby.

oh, and they love you back, by the way. this is your baby and they toddle by your heels and babble at you (with signs) as they try, usually, to do what you tell them to do. they do this because you're their parent, it's clear that they love you. eventually, they start talking and they call you apa, abuelo, mama, dada -- and then they tell you, to your face, that they love you.

you fed them, played with them, protected them, tucked them into bed in a room in your home. you sang them to sleep, bathed them, dressed them, taught them skills and morals. you can see yourself reflected in their personality, their interests, and even how they look (leo's red hat/chayanne in the skull 'fit). they're your baby."

...and then he expected a series of (vaguely) sane people in their 20s/30s not to immediately become sick with devotion?? to be in tears over the silly little eggs?? like, no joke, if that had actually been the outcome i would have thrown every psychological and anthropological text i own in the trash in a fit of disbelief 💀

[chaoswarfare]

dp x dc prompt #36

i’ve seen a lot of prompts about de-aged danny running around gotham from the GIW, and one of the bats find him and practically adopt him on the spot.

what i want to see is a very self sufficient four year old danny that has already been successfully escaping for a while with just some minor help from gotham, and is only found because he’s doing something stupid while running away from someone.

i want danny getting chased by the GIW through the city, and the bats only notice when he tarzan swings by them with laxer fire chasing him.

[aspen-charminghearts]

“Chloe fell first, Red fell harder” “No Red fell first and Chloe fell harder” “No! Chloe fell first and fell harder” “Nope! Red fell first and harder!”

No! Hear me out please.

They BOTH fell at the same time! BOTH were horribly fallen for one another but BOTH were absolutely clueless in different ways, and BOTH are horribly obsessed with each other and can’t bear to spend a second without the other. Chloe was clueless in comphet denial and Red was clueless in “I don’t get love, why is my heart palpitating immensely every time I look at Chloe? Am I dying? [Gasp] Did someone put a curse on me for every time I look at Chloe I almost get a heart attack and my body temperature increases in my face?”

This leads to a lot of horrible situations where one desperately tries to tell the other but the other just doesn’t get it and they’re stuck in this horrible loop until one of them has enough and they pull the other in the kiss.

[qiu-yan]

lbr if fanon portrayals differing wildly from canon characterization is enough to warrant the existence of a "canon [character]" tag, then we desperately need a "canon wei wuxian" tag.

[unhetalia]

I think Nations are generally stronger than the average human. If an adult male can carry up to 80kgs without too much difficulty, a fully grown Nation can do around 3x that amount, no matter their gender.

Alfred is an abberation in that he could carry animals that weigh at LEAST 400kg as a child. This has nothing to do with the US' status as a superpower because it's been that way since he was a child (and also because my headcanon doesn't connect the Nations with their countries in that way).

Without delving too deep as to why, I've always liked the idea of Alfred's increased strength coming with a few caveats -

1) As he's gotten older, his strength has acquired limitations it never had when he was a child - the main one being that using it requires energy. If he wants to be able to lift a car, he absolutely can, but he needs to eat a lot, otherwise his blood sugar will crash. Alfred eats a lot and constantly, and this is part of the reason (the other part is that food is delicious).

2) Alfred is so used to relying on his strength, it's become his weakness without him even realising it.

Alfred views exercise the same way most modern humans view it: he exercises to stay healthy. He hikes, he bikes, he plays sports, and if he thinks he's gained weight he promises himself he'll go to the gym (he doesn't).

Nations like Arthur, Ivan, Erzsebet and Gilbert - to name a few - who don't have super strength, hone their bodies into weapons with purpose. I love to imagine (for many reasons) a sweaty Arthur, hands wrapped in boxing gauze and wearing a tank top ... erm. Punching stuff. I distracted myself there. ANYWAY. They're incredibly disciplined about maintaining their skills and fitness.

Alfred is reliant on his super strength. If it disappears one day, he's actually a lot less capable of defending himself than he thinks.

[guardian-of-da-gay]

inspired by this post cuz the only thing I love more than my OP blorbo losing it and going apeshit is my OP blorbo losing control completely

also this is my first Sonic fanart yay

[enbyfrogz]

“I’m now becoming my own self-fulfilling prophecy…”

[luluxa]

since we're on the subject - these tiny soothing gestures between them, so intimate and sweet 😭

(I don't remember whose video it is - let me know and I'll link it!)

[thepunkpanther]

3.08 / 3.12 / 4.03 / 4.10 

[emma-d-klutz]

I wish Batman would fuck with the Joker more. I know he can't. Scratch, I know an important piece of their core dynamic is that he is above it, which opens the way to great contrasts when other characters (ie icon Terry Bats) do. But come on, it would be so easy. It would be free.

During a teamup in Gotham, Bats could dreamily remark that he likes Superman because he makes him laugh. What options does the clownfucker have now? Try to jealously kill fucking Superman or simply dive backwards into the Hudson River. The whole thing would take ten seconds of work, and I don't think there'd be collateral damage. Superman's already there.

[calcifiedcadaver]

Look past the facade and see it for what it really is....

See them for what they really are.

(Or, what if Ink could see the creators and totally isn't maybe still a little resentful over being abandoned, haha, what made you think that?)

[sarafangirlart]

I lied, put your clothes back on we’re gonna talk about how modern discourse and rewrites on the ‘damsel in distress’ trope are actually low key victim blame-y and don’t actually give the damsel in question more agency but rather make her “‘strong’”’ in a masculine sense.

[mamawasatesttube]

i accepted im not finishing the timkon vday fic today and instead launched into yet another new wip instead. i present to you: a snippet of kon vs his deeply repressed medical trauma, featuring core four and what is gonna be some gratuitous kon & clark fambly focus...

The voices are still talking, too loud and too fast to understand. Kon tries to breathe harder, his heart racing—the beeping doesn’t help—and looks around frantically. Where’s the exit? He just came through a door, but he doesn’t know where it went—

A gloved hand settles on his arm, and a cold wipe that smells of alcohol scrubs over his skin. Kon tilts his head to see what’s happening.

A needle glints in the doctor’s other hand. They’re prepping his arm for intravenous injection.

“NO!” He jerks away, terror flaring through his stomach. It’s so poignant it almost drowns out the agony. His TTK flares, too, and the doctor and the needle in their hand fly across the room, far away. A flash of light and a person with chestnut hair catches them, so they’re not hurt.

Good. Kon didn’t mean to hurt anyone. He just—he just wants them to stay away.

He’s safe for the moment. Kon sobs for breath—

“Kon!” The person from before, the one lying and saying it’d be okay, appears again. They grab Kon’s hand and squeeze it. “Kon, she was only trying to help! You’re safe, I swear—”

Kon jerks away. “Don’t—don’t lie to me—” he manages. He needs to get up. He needs to get out of here. He needs… he needs…

When he tries to sit up, pure agony lances through his entire body. It radiates out from his gut and spears up through his chest like lightning, so sharp he can’t breathe and stars sparkle across his blurry vision.

What did they do to him?!

He isn’t safe here, he needs to get out of here! It’s only gonna get worse the longer he stays; they’ll get another doctor, another needle—he has to sit up, he needs to move—

Strong hands clamp onto his shoulders and hold him down. Despite all his strength, they hold him down. Kon cries out, a new wave of ice-cold terror spearing through him. “No! No, no let me go!”

“Cassie, you’re scaring him!” the other voice says, tugging at the new person’s wrists, completely ineffectively. “We need to calm him down, not—"

The new person, Cassie, ignores them. “Kon, listen to me.”

Kon shakes his head, terrified. “No no no no no!”

“Kon, you can’t hurt the doctors. They’re trying to help, okay? You’re badly hurt, and they’re trying to help, but you need to let them do their jobs!”

Another person in surgical scrubs approaches. Kon barely hears what they say over all the roaring in his ears, but it doesn’t matter. He knows how Cadmus operates.

“…you restrain him until we can administer anesthesia?” he overhears. It’s enough. He hyperventilates, sobs for breath, shoves ineffectively at the strong arms holding him down. Desperate, he shoves at Cassie with TTK. Thankfully, that has some effect: she yelps as he shoves himself a few inches off the bed, but then sharp, white-hot pain sears through his entire body, and his vision blacks out.

When he comes to, Cassie is over him again, and—and—

Glowing, golden ropes wind tight around his shoulders, his wrists, his thighs, his legs. He’s completely pinned to the bed. One end of the ropes is wrapped around Cassie’s hands.

He can’t move.

He can’t escape.

No. No no no no this can’t happen again, they’re going to hurt him and he needs to get out but he can’t—he can’t—oh, god, this is happening again and he’s just gonna have to take it, and—and it already hurts so much, he can’t take it—

Kon chokes on another sob. “Please,” he begs. “Please please please please—”

Cassie looks anguished. “I’m sorry, Kon,” she says, but she’s not sorry enough to let him go, so it doesn’t matter. “It’s for your own good, I swear.”

He can’t move. He can’t move and it hurts and he can’t move and it hurts and no matter how hard he struggles, he’s pinned, and it hurts it hurts it hurts so so so bad, and oh, god, he’s trapped. He’s trapped, he can’t—he can’t—

Terrified, Kon does the only thing he can think of.

“SUPERMAN!” he screams. “Kal! Kal-El! Please, please—help me, help me, don’t—don’t let them do this to me again, Kal, Kal—”

There’s a pinch in his arm.

The needle.

Kon falls silent.

It’s… it’s really happening again, isn’t it? No matter how much he fights and screams and pleads. They’re gonna cut him open and hurt him and put him back in the tube. They’re gonna make him just another slab of tissue. An experiment and not a person. It’s happening again. And he can’t stop it. He can’t escape.

He can’t escape.

His chest hurts. A single tear rolls down the side of his face into his hair.

The door slams open. Kon’s gaze snaps over.

“What is going on here?”

Superman stands in the doorway, resplendent in all his glory. He’s an even more welcome sight than the sun, and even though Kon can’t move thanks to the golden ropes, he whimpers, fingers twitching as he yearns to reach for him.

He looks furious.

[elloras]

Ted Lasso: Carol of the Bells