#classism and way he treats his friends

[questionablequeeries]

Jesus Christ, Lucas on the Line makes it tough to support Lucas. He’s so incredibly judgmental of D&D as well as Eddie, who’s actively done nothing to him, and the hypocrisy boggles the mind.

[sincerlyus]

Reverse Falls!!

Soo this is my take on Reverse Falls!! I don't really know which are the original designs or which are the new personalities that each character adapts, so I made my own headcanons!! :3

It should be noted that there are characters who do not change personalities with anyone, but rather their personalities are more exaggerated or are opposite to the originals. Or (in the case of McGucket) their relationships are different so they change their way of being progressively.

EXPLANATION TIME:

This is quite long, I'm going to explain the personalities of each one and how they relate to various characters. Credits to: hours of daydreaming and Google Translate  (TW: child abuse, emotional and physical abuse, homophobia, classism. I don't know if there's anything else, just in case)

Pacifica Northwest: Outgoing and very expressive. She didn't know Gideon very well until her parents sent her to Reverse Falls. She likes to knit, draw, and has a lot of stuffed animals. She has a lot of hair, and likes to do different hairstyles every day ("to be innovative"), cries when she has to cut it. She is very affectionate with Gideon and tries to get him out of his shell. She is a little insecure, but likes to see the positive side of things. She gets along very well with Bud, although sometimes she feels he is a little weird. Symbol: Llama (on her sweater)

Gideon Gleefull: Insecure, has little self-confidence, very skittish and anxious. Has a habit of chewing when he is thinking, like OG!Dipper (chewing on pens, his shirt, etc.). He didn't really know how to talk to Paz at first since the first time they met they were very little, what was she going to say?, was a "Hello" enough?, a handshake?, a complicated handshake?, was she going to ignore him? Paz simply gave him a big hug when she got off the bus (+ gave him a sweater she made on the way). Symbol: Telepathy star (in his hat)

Bud Gleefull: Ultimate scammer. Very friendly and funny, although sometimes a little intimidating. Bye Hawaiian shirts. Very patient with Gideon. He is basically the “cool uncle/dad”. He put Paz to work the day she arrived, although he became attached very quickly and gave her family privileges (he does the same with Gideon).

Mason “Dipper” Pines: He is still very insecure but is able to feign confidence when standing on stage with his sister. He still has a lot of passion for science, he is not very affectionate, he holds back his emotions as he does not want to look vulnerable, especially in front of Stanford. He has a lot of respect for Ford (or rather, fear), being his apprentice he sees him more as a teacher, a superior figure than as an uncle; however he has very little respect for Stan, threatening him and making fun of him. He does not usually use his amulet much, only to practice tricks or in his shows. He has a very distant relationship with his sister, similar to that of the Stan twins. They have many disagreements, but they still have each other's back, especially when Ford is aggressive with one of them. The most sincere relationship he has is with F, although he still treats him like an employee, knowing that he was one of the brilliant minds behind the portal he respects him. Sometimes he discusses theories and shares discoveries with him (although he is embarrassed to think that his only "friend" is an employee of his uncle). Once he met Gideon and Paz, he was able to show his more fragile side and be himself, although he doesn't consider them completely friends (that changes post-weirdmageddon). Symbol: Pine tree (a small pin)

Mabel Pines: A spoiled brat, basically. She's very charming and friendly on stage and with guests at the Pines' many parties, but she's very whiny and selfish behind the scenes. She's not at all affectionate, to the point that she hates physical contact, especially if it's from townspeople. She resents her brother a lot for being Ford's "favorite" (he doesn't really have favorites, he's just less strict with Dipper because he's useful to him). She's Stan's spoiled child, giving her what she wants when she wants it (they have a nice relationship actually, Stan being one of the only ones who comforts her when she's sad). Instead of knitting, she likes to design her own dresses and accessories for shows and parties (her guilty pleasure is arts & crafts, since it's a very "childish" activity for a Pines). Obsessed with Paz, but learns to respect her limits throughout the story. Symbol: Shooting Star (a small pin)

Stanley Pines: He basically swaps personalities with Bud, runs the Telepathy Tent, is very friendly, and is scared of his brother and the twins. He never gets involved in Ford's experiments, having a very tense relationship with him. He loves the twins very much but knowing the power they have with those amulets he prefers to go along with them and not question too much what they ask (he knows when to be firm but the one who really has an impact on them and can make them see reason is Ford). Symbol: Oyster(?? (on a necklace)

Stanford F. Pines: Did you think OG! Ford was a jerk? Well now he's twice as much! He doesn't have an ounce of empathy in him, he's very narcissistic and only cares about his projects and his image. He doesn't care at all about the twins, only seeing them as a way to make money, demanding the most out of them, and he doesn't hesitate to use violence if any of them get out of line. He's very distant with Stanley, speaking to him very dryly (or rather, barely speaking to him at all). He's almost a hermit, living in his laboratory, not letting the townspeople get to know him; although unlike OG! Ford, he cares a lot about how he presents himself in front of the public, taking care of his image and clothing. He's very demanding with Mabel, as he feels she's nothing more than a spoiled child, the image of the Telepathy Tent along with her brother. He is a bit kinder to Dipper, as he realizes that he has a brilliant mind for his age (though not more so than his own), so he includes him in many of his experiments and research if he proves useful; but excluding that, he is just as insensitive as he is with his twin, mistreating him if he does not comply with what is due. His relationship with McGucket is kinda weird: although they were friends in college, the power that Bill/Will offered him completely consumed him, being abusive to F, forcing him to work long nights, keeping him awake by force. He only sees him for his use: his great skill with mechanics (which Ford does not have, although he hates to mention it). Although he was in love with F while he was at Backupsmore, he currently has no romantic feelings towards him, considering him an employee, his assistant, nothing more. He has internalized homophobia (a gift from Filbrick) and classism, so he hates to remember when his relationship with F was one of equals, friends. It disgusts him to think about when he would get so emotional around him. Symbol: Six Fingered Hand (the diaries)

Fiddleford H. McGucket: He is still the brilliant mind he was in his youth, but stress eats him alive. He started to age very quickly thanks to it. He invented the memory gun to try to forget all the horrible things he witnessed or that Ford made him suffer, but his boss doesn't allow him to use it too much since it can damage his mental health and erase knowledge, making him less efficient and useful. He doesn't have a very deep relationship with Stanley, since he practically lives in the lab where Ford forces him to work, but they are able to talk whenever F has a break (almost never). He can't stand the twins too much, not only because he feels that they are very annoying, but because the simple presence of children in his day to day life reminds him a lot of Tate, with whom he no longer has contact. Everyone knows about the abusive relationship he has with Stanford, they are not indifferent to it but they try not to mention it or get involved in his affairs (practically out of fear of Ford).  Throughout his stay with Stanford he started developing an emotional dependence on him: not only did he make him feel that he was useless without him, but he uses violence on him when he is not fulfilling his duty, causing F to blame himself when this happens (What did he do wrong? What can he do to improve?). This got to the point where he started to hurt himself when he did not do something right. Ex: hitting himself when he noticed that his leg was bouncing in front of his anxiety (something that bothers Ford a lot), pulling out clumps of hair in front of the stress of not being able to achieve something, biting his nails, scratching himself, hitting his head (imagine Dobby from HP). Such actions and the mixed feelings he had towards Ford, made him develop masochism, enjoying when he inflicts pain on himself and when he is the victim of Ford's physical and psychological abuse, he clearly hid this for a while since it would look very unprofessional on his part.  Eventually his boss found out and used this to his advantage, being quite sadist himself (he enjoys watching or inflicting pain and/or humiliation on others, in this case, he gets sexual pleasure). So every time Ford needs to let off some steam, vent his frustrations (or is just horny), he uses Fiddleford to fulfill his fantasies, making F's wishes come true as well. He basically uses him as a sex toy, and F doesn't complain, having suffered so much emotional manipulation, he even considers himself lucky that his boss wants to be with him like this, even if it's NOT healthy. Symbol: Spectacles

Bill Cipher: I don't like the idea of ​​changing his name, so Bill stays. He's still the same chaotic demon as in the original series, but this time he's been tricked by Ford into working for him and doing his bidding. He's also forced to do the twins' bidding. We already know that Bill can change his shape and color, so I think all of his shame and self-pity manifests itself in his appearance, turning blue over time (any strong emotion makes him change his appearance). He manipulates Gideon and Paz, making them feel sorry for him so they'll do his bidding (it doesn't work, clearly). The people he has the most contact with are Ford and Fiddleford, as they spend most of their time in the basement where he's locked up.

So that's it. I don't really know how this timeline would work, considering the portal and the journals, but I just wanted to have fun with the character designs and relationships (I feel like the weirdmageddon would happen sooner than in the original timeline). If you want me to go deeper into certain relationships or characters, let me know!!(≧▽≦) I'll see if I can go deeper into the relationship between Ford and Fiddleford that you guys liked so much (you guys really like toxic yaoi, huh??). I'm thinking of making a fanfic or smt to explain their day to day life in the lab and how Ford invited F to work with him (SPOILER: it didn't go well...).

That's it ig, LIKE AND SUSCRIBE!!!1!!1!Σ(°ロ°)

[fortunafavours]

Welcome to Fortuna, Kingdom of Splendor!

demo • FAQs • bsky

You are the bastard child of the king’s cousin, you’ve never been anyone special. The Crown made sure of that. Taken in by your father after the death of your mother, you were never allowed to speak of your parentage under threat of being sent to an orphanage, so you took on the role of servant to your father's house. Now, just before your thirtieth birthday, you’ve begun having a strange, recurring dream: something beneath the mountains knows your name—something ancient—and it wants you to find it. But the stone isn’t the only thing after you. According to your oldest friend, an elite team of sorcerers from a group known as SCEPTRE are interested in speaking with you—by order of the king. And that's nothing to say of the rumblings of discontent in the streets, led by someone known only as the Crow. Apparently, they've got eyes on you, too. Why have you suddenly become the centre of attention? You’re nobody special. …Aren’t you?

Fortuna Favours the Bold is a low fantasy, high stakes, romance forward tale about self-discovery and buried secrets. Unearth the truth of what waits under the mountain, find out who you really are, and try not to get yourself blown up along the way!

It draws inspiration from media like Dragon Age: Origins, House of the Dragon, the Elder Scrolls series, as well as a myriad of Dungeons & Dragons campaigns I've been a part of, and other similar stories. If you like any of those, you might like Fortuna!

Fortuna is currently a WIP and, as always, is subject to change!

Play as male, female, or non-binary; gay, straight, lesbian, or bisexual!

Get caught up in a government conspiracy, or expose the corruption within!

Choose from six characters to romance: a chivalrous blacksmith, a charming physician, a socialite lawyer, the captain of the guard, the soft-spoken acolyte, or your mage friend from childhood!

Determine the ultimate fate of the kingdom! Will you lead it to ruin, or improve the state of affairs? Will you be a hero of the people, or a pawn in someone else's game?

Protect yourself, protect your loved ones, protect the city - or don't!

But above all, remember to keep the peace. The Crown thanks you for your cooperation.

Fortuna is rated 18+ for explicit language, sexual content, alcohol and drug use, violence, morally questionable behaviour, and more.

For a full list of content warnings, please see below the cut.

CONTENT WARNINGS: sexual situations (optionally explicit), abuse of power, sexism, misogyny, (occasionally graphic) depictions of violence, elements of horror, unreality, mentions of suicide, classism, alcohol and drug use, mentions of upsetting situations regarding pregnancy (abortions, miscarriages, stillborns, infertility, and birthing complications), confined and dark spaces, and death.

There may be some I've missed, but I've listed all the ones that I know for certain off the top of my head. Please reach out if there's something you've noticed that isn't listed here!

Please note that the MC is 29, almost 30; the most significant age gap is 9 years. Please do not message me about this. Everyone involved in the story is a consenting adult and is treated as such. If the gap in age bothers you, don't feel compelled to read it. I won't be upset.

I, myself, am 30 years old, and am fine with all listed age differences (obviously. I created these characters lol).

Now that that's out of the way, meet the ROs!:

Malcolm Ashford, 36 [M]

The primary blacksmith for the Crown ever since they took over his forge, though he's not exactly happy about it. Malcolm is a good, honourable sort; kindhearted and genuine, he's easy to approach and talk to. He is also the biggest hopeless romantic - a fact that Cyril never lets him forget. He can primarily be found at the forge in the centre of the courtyard marketplace.

Malcolm is 6'4" (193 cm), broad shouldered, muscular, and usually covered in some sort of soot. He has fair skin (but is usually sporting an intense farmer's tan), shoulder length light brown hair, a light beard, dark grey eyes, and a beauty mark just above his upper left lip.

His face claim is Eoin Macken.

Cyril Trevelyan, 34 [M]

An old friend of Malcolm's. If anyone asks, Cyril is a "non-practicing" physician. Previously a member of the Royal Physician's Guild, he has since left and now operates an illegal clinic in the lower quarters of the capital, where he can primarily be found, though he has been known to frequent a local tavern and can occasionally be spotted harassing Malcolm at the forge. Cyril is charming, outgoing, and would love to get to know you. Just don't expect him to be very forthcoming about himself.

Cyril is 6'2" (187 cm), with an athletic build. He has tan skin, short, cropped black hair, stubble, and hazel eyes. He has a small scar across his left eyebrow and another small scar through his upper lip.

His face claim is Miguel Ángel Silvestre.

Dominic / Dominica Trevelyan, 38 [M/F]

Cyril's older sibling and the current Commandant of the King's Army. They care about the citizens of Requiem, but are less idealistic than Cyril about how to go about bringing change. They generally mean well and try to make things as easy as possible for the masses, but it isn't always seen as enough. Their relationship with Cyril is... tense. To say the least. They are taciturn and serious, and could probably do with some lightening up.

D is 6'4" (193 cm) (M) / 6'1" (185 cm) (F). They are broad shouldered and a little paunchy, but muscular, strong, and a force to be reckoned with in battle. They have tan skin like their brother, short, black hair that they keep slicked back from their face, and light brown eyes.

Their face claims are Keon Alexander and Rosa Gilmore.

James Johnathan / Jane Josephine 'J.J.' St. James, 28 [M/F]

JJ is a notable lawyer from the noble St. James household, though they aren't typically the first one that comes to mind when the St. James name is brought up. No, that luxury would go to just about anyone else in their family, given JJ is the only one without magic. They're a hard worker, extremely diligent, but have just a teensy tiny chip on their shoulder. They're a bit smarmy, but there is a good heart in there. Somewhere.

JJ is 5'10" (177 cm) (M) / 5'8" (173 cm) (F). They have a lean, athletic build, pale skin, light blue eyes, and copper-brown hair.

Their face claims are Richard Madden and Philipine Urvois.

Amaryllis / Amaranthus Calyx, 30 [F/M]*

One of the royal twins, but also an acolyte to the Divine Valentine, goddess of mercy. They have chosen to dedicate their time to the Temple of the Divines, honing their healing magic and providing succor to those in need, emulating all the virtues Valentine embodies. They are soft spoken and kind, but sheltered and naive. They want to help, but have an impressive lack of self-awareness and preservation, and are more likely to get themselves into trouble unintentionally. Hopefully, you won't have to babysit them too much.

A is 5'10" (177 cm) (F) / 6'0" (183 cm) (M). Amaryllis has a slight, willowy build, shoulder length, dark brown hair that she wears in a bob, a small dusting of freckles across the nose, and dark brown eyes that (like most members of the royal family) are ringed with gold. Amaranthus has a lean, athletic build, short, dark brown hair kept neat and styled back from his face, and the same dark brown gold-ringed eyes as his sister. He also wears glasses, though he's constantly forgetting where he put them.

Their face claims are Adeline Rudolph and Kenta Sakurai.

*Unlike the other gender selectable ROs, A's gender setting determines which of the two twins you end up encountering as opposed to deciding the gender for one character. The other will appear in the story regardless, but will not be romanceable if you select the opposite gender. The other twin has a separate job, position, and demeanour and an entirely different personality from the chosen romanceable one, which will be determined by who you select as RO.

Elliott 'Eli' / Eleanor 'Ellie' Rosefinch, 30 [M/F]

Your oldest friend and most trusted confidant, they've known you since you were twelve and you've been thick as thieves since. They're one of the very few magic users in the capital, and have been recruited into SCEPTRE, the kingdom's elite training program for budding sorcerers. They're down to earth and easygoing, grounded, and calm under fire. They tend towards being the far more rational of the two of you.

E is 5'11" (180 cm), with a dancer's build. They have brown skin, short, curly black hair, brown eyes, and sparse freckling.

Their face claims are Dev Patel and Nikita Chadha.

[chaifootsteps]

does the 'we're only halfway through' squad realize that half of a show is more than enough time to expect actual character development to happen? because it hasn't and I suspect it won't, because Viv is terrible at actually making character changes stick

Blitzo - he's fared the best of everyone but it's still not much to look at - he's still an impulsive jerk who's mean to Moxxie. He's decided to stop butting in on M&M not because he respects either of their boundaries more now but because he's pining for Stolas for no adequately explained reason. His relationship with Loona hasn't changed, he's still a bit overbearing and overprotective. He's made up with Fizz but it doesn't really feel like he's changed meaningfully to become a person who wouldn't make the same mistake again because the first mistake was just an accident he couldn't have foreseen. Regressed in some ways because Stolas has totally wrecked his confidence and made him behave out of character by making Loona, his beloved daughter, burn taxidermy owls and neglected to pay his employees i.e. hurt the people who should matter to pine over his abuser.

On his end he's treated rephrensibly by the people who are supposed to love him - Stolas obviously, but also treated poorly by Fizz, M&M and Loona as not one of them think how Stolas treated him is messed up. IMP in particular are actively aware of Stolas being the meal ticket and assume it's fine to pimp out their boss since he's not complaining about it?

Moxxie - learns he needs to be confident in his own skills. Repeatedly. Occasionally calls Blitzo by first name but still uses 'sir' often, so he hasn't really changed there. No relationship to speak of with Loona. Mostly happy together with Millie

Millie - her only plots are helping the men get their shit together. Stopped calling Loona hellhound for no explained reason

Loona - made a friend in Tex, kind of. No change in most of her relationships with the cast because she barely has one

Via - repeating the same 'why does dad keep neglecting me' arc until she cuts him off, at which point he'll probably win her back in five minutes (then go right back to ignoring her)

Stolas - developed to learn the deal was wrong but not really since he's ending it principally because Blitzo wouldn't date him at the same time as Stolas was sexually extorting him. Still treats Blitzo like an object whose feelings inconvenience him. Still neglects his daughter. Learnt to stand up to Stella out of nowhere, so there's that I guess. Regressed harder than anyone else in terms of development since he's incapable of ever admitting when he's done wrong - it's not cheating since he says so, and gives lip service to the idea he's hurt Blitzo before being Shocked and Appalled whenever Blitzo confirms outright 'you hurt me'. Still talks down to imps. Has yet to acknowledge any of the members of IMP by name or show gratitude for them saving his life. A waste of flesh and screentime

Fizz - changed from a chaotic sassy king to a scared abused woobie. Managed to get free of Mammon in the space of one episode. Made up with Blitzo. Feels bad about not being equal to Ozzie but we're going to sweep that under the rug since classism storylines are a problem for making stol1tz happen

Striker - went from a legitimately scary antagonist who had a point, tempted Blitzo with great chemistry to a laughing stock who not only always loses but is called a supremacist despite only having ever pointed out the rich have all the power and mistreat the poor (a thing the show has proven him right about time and again). Goes from smooth seductor to joke with a hygiene problem

like, we can admit this is a tiny amount of development for two whole seasons and 50% of the entire show, right?

You can really tell the people in this fandom who actually watch other forms of media from the ones who don't, and by that I mean "haters expecting everything to be revealed in episode one." Shows don't reveal or even necessarily plan everything from day one, but I can't think of another cartoon that wobbles around as much as HB does.

[aspoonofsugar]

Some Millie and IMP Thoughts

I love Helluva Boss's new episode for all the reasons everyone else does! In particular, my favorite part is Millie getting fleshed out more.

I have always liked Millie and I disagree with people saying she is badly written. That said, the focus she got this episode adds a ton of depth to both her, her role in the series and the dynamics within IMP.

BLITZ AND IMP

Blitz is the titular character and protagonist of the series. He is the boss in Helluva Boss. As a result, everyone else is in the story for his sake. In particular, IMP is Blitz's found family:

Blitzo: Look, the point is, Loona is a valued member of our family, and we don't get rid of family. Moxxie: We aren't a family, sir! You are the boss! We are the employees!

Through them (and Stolas) Blitz gets to explore his ghosts and to heal. How is that so?

Loona and Moxxie seem to me two sides of the same coin:

-Loona is like Blitz, as she is told by the world she has no real value:

Adoption Center Lady: Oh, her? That's just Loona. What a nightmare. Serious attitude problems. She'll be out of our hair next month when she ages out. Good riddance, if you ask me. She'll never amount to anything much.

So, Blitz latches on her and adopts her. He showers her with the love he never got from his father.

-Moxxie is like Blitz, as he is abused by his father and loses his mother. As a result, he grows up unsure of himself and in need of love and approval:

Blitzo: Well, I'm glad everything ended up okay. Good to know we both have daddy issues, Mox.

However, Blitz often treats him poorly, downplays his abilities and mocks him.

So, Loona and Moxxie are Blitz's mirrors, as he projects on them in opposite ways. He treats Loona like he wishes his father treated him. He treats Moxxie similarly to how his father treated him. Obviously, Blitz isn't an abuser like Buckzo. He loves Moxxie and more importantly he is not his father. However, he and Moxxie do have a mentor-mentee dynamic and it is clear as day Moxxie wants Blitz's approval:

Blitzo: Gonna be honest, Moxxie- Not too bad for your first solo mission. Moxxie: Reeeeeally, siiiir? Blitzo: Nooo, no, not really. You're a fucking disgrace.

Still, Blitz is often unable to give it to him, despite the fact he clearly cares. This is also why Loona and Moxxie get often on each other's nerves:

Loona: How am I supposed to smell anything in this city? Moxxie: Can't you even do one thing right? Loona: Can't you finally do something about how fat you are?

Moxxie is the most critical of Blitz's favoritism towards Loona and is the one insisting Blitz calls her out on her poor attitude towards clients. This is not by chance. They are just like bickering siblings :''')

In a sense, this episode even subtly confirms this foiling:

Blitz: Loonie's perfect, and Moxxie's… probably got some good traits too and I'm sure we'll figure them out eventually.

Loona is perfect and Moxxie has no good traits. What about seeing the world in black and white?

So, where does Millie fit in all of this?

Blitzo: So I'm your best friend, huh? Millie: What do you think? Blitzo: I think…I- I've never had a real friend that I didn't wanna fuck.

She is the only one Blitz does not project over, so they grow into genuine friends. They are equals, value each other and love each other. So, Millie freely states what Loona and Moxxie also think, but can't properly convey:

Millie: He (Blitz) gave me so much…A career, a husband, a future. And now…He's my best friend. Blitzo: You… you don't hate me? Millie: Naw, never.

Blitz gave her, Moxxie and Loona a better future. He is their precious boss and a treasured family member.

MILLIE'S THEME

Helluva Boss has two main themes:

Relationships

Classism

Moxxie is linked to Blitz's unhealthy way to build relationships. Their bond is a complicated mix of friendship, family love, professional interest and a little bit of possessiveness on Blitz's part. That's why it is so complicated and contradictive. Millie ties into this as Moxxie's wife, since M&M's relationship is Blitz's ideal one.

Still, this episode makes clear Millie's true thematic relevance is for the topic of classism:

Millie: We… heh. We don't deserve this. We're just Wrathians, Blitzo. Muscle. It's all we're good for, all I'm good for. It's why you hired me. Any demon good at making a buck is welcome in Lust or Greed, but here? Demons like us ain't cut out for this.

Classism permeates Hell, which is built on a strong hierarchy. All characters have suffered the consequences of this, while being influenced by it at the same time. For example:

Blitz is an imp, who has been looked down and victimized by society. However, he also embraces classist prejudices and uses them as an excuse to push Stolas away.

Stolas is a Goetia, who has been a prisoner of his family's expectations and of his role in society. However, he is also unconsciously discriminating towards imps. He has no ill will towards them, but he calls them silly names and belittles them

Millie is the same. She is a wrathian imp of humble origins. In a sense, she is a stereotypical imp. She is incredibly strong, was born and lived the majority of her life in Wrath, aka imps' original ring. She fits the expectations of both her family and society. However, she deep down wishes for more, which is why she leaves the family ranch to become an assassin. This choice is already seen as subversive by her family, who expected her to stay home, so she could help with the family business. However, Millie herself has no high expectations for her future:

Millie: Bullshit! Who sent you? Millie: Who are you working for?! Blitzo: What? You don't believe me? Millie: Imps don't work for themselves, asshole.

She still sees herself stuck in Wrath. She will be one of many underpaid goons, who work for higher ranking demons. A life a little bit more adventurous than the one at the farm. Still, nothing extraordinary. Then, she meets Blitz:

Millie: Who's that? Your boss? Hah! Blitzo: HA he fucking wishes. No, I work for myself, lady.

Blitz is the first one, who recognizes her potential and who believes she can become more than what she is. He gives her the chance to explore the world outside the Wrath Ring and brings her up to Pride. When Millie doubts herself and her role in society, he is the one to reassure her:

Blitzo: Millie, I have spent too much of my time, energy, and holes into setting this up for us to entertain your bullshit. I brought you into this company for a reason, okay? You're tougher, smarter, and frankly more capable than anyone I've ever met in any ring.

Blitz gives Millie a new life, where she is free to be herself and to choose a husband she would have never chosen, if she had stayed home with her family.

Thanks to Blitz and her work at IMP she is by this point a different person than the one she was. She does not completely fit in Wrath anymore:

Sallie May: Heh, yeah, I mean, with so many exciting things here, it's no wonder you never make your way back home. SHIT! That slipped out. Millie: ..What? Sallie May: You know… the Wrath Ring, all that dirt and rust and boring nothingness. Not much of a thriving club scene down there, why visit that, right?

Which is why she is now slowly overcoming her prejudices:

Millie: Oh yeah! Y'all haven't met my boss Blitzo! And his hellhound! Loona: I'm not just his hellhound.

It is not by chance Millie is the one calling Loona Blitz's Hellbound, as if she were a pet. Moreover, it is not by chance she does so, while talking with her family. It is probably normal for wrathian imps to see hellbounds as property. So, when she visits home, she goes back to a familiar language and mindset, without even realizing how offensive it is. That is why it is relevant this episode has Millie share a bonding moment with Loona, where she calls her by name:

Millie: Thanks. Loona.

She is not only overcoming her self-insecurities, but she is also starting to see other demons differently. She is growing not only more happy, but also more open minded. All thanks to Blitz's impact on her life:

Millie: Most of my life I bought into the idea that all I could ever be was a simple farm girl. Or best an underpaid goon. Until I met some knucklehead who never gave a fuck about what anyone else said he could or couldn't be. He made me believe he could be anything. And that made me feel like I could be anything, too.

CHARLIE AND BLITZ

Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss are twin series. They are complementary stories, with different focuses and a shared heart. This is shown in Charlie and Blitz, their respective protagonists. They are opposites.

Charlie is a royal demon, a young rich girl, who is optimistic and idealistic. She is obsessed with seeing the good in others. Blitz is instead a humble imp, an adult man, who is cynical and genre-savy. He sees only the worst in people to protect himself. However, both disrupt the status quo:

Charlie decides to completely change the hierarchy between hell and heaven. She is breaking the system the world is built on and re-writing the laws of the universe.

Blitz changes things in little ways. He is not trying to reform society, but he still acts in ways society does not expect, so he subverts hierarchies and transforms people around him.

That's something that comes up several times:

Striker: Boss, huh…? Ohhh, so YOU'RE the bold imp to start his own killing biz? Blitzo: Yeah, well if you're good at somethin', you should probably capitalize. Striker: Not many Imps start businesses on their own. That's pretty impressive, sir.

Crimson: Oh, I'm sure. You got to be Blitz, with the silent "o", right? I've heard a lot of good things about you and your work. Blitzo: Really? What kind of shit has Moxxie been spreading about me? I'll fucking kill you Moxxie, don't you fucking test me! Crimson: No, no! From all over. Looks like you're building a bit of a name for yourself here, kid.

Both Striker and Crimson comment on Blitz's business, in two moments that are to be seen as parallels:

-Striker says so, as the group visits Millie's family. Millie's family is a relatively happy one, as they all clearly love each other. However, it is an economically struggling one:

Joe: We lost our old farm hand to one of them terrors last week.

Millie's parents are loving, but traditionalists and stuck in the old ways.

-Crimson says so, as the group meets him and discovers he is Moxxie's father. Crimson is an imp, who built an empire. Moreover, he is not scared to go against the hierarchy and to challenge even the deadly sins:

Crimson: You probably just asked if I know who I'm dealing with. And, oh yes, I know. The weakest and most non-threatening of the Sins. The king who will do whatever it takes to save the worst-kept secret in all of Hell. We both know you won't risk anything happening to the clown. So be a good little bitch boy, and do the thing. My lawyers will be over shortly with the contract of demands. You have until the witching hour to sign it. Hueheheheheheheh!

Still, he sacrifices everything else to greed. In order to climb up, he destroys everyone around him. He killed his wife and abused Moxxie, so his son leaves him the first chance he gets.

In other words, Blitz offers Millie the opportunity to social climb and he offers Moxxie true friendship and comraderie. He gives them what they miss and want.

STRIKER

Finally, this episode indirectly adds a new layer to Striker's character and his role in the series. So, Striker is clearly everyone's dark foil.

Specifically, he is Blitz's jungian shadow aka what Blitz represses:

Striker: Blitzo, come on. You know, the two of us are superior than most of our kind. And you were so above suckin' on a disgusting, rich, pompous Goetia, only to sneak topside for scraps and work for bitter sinners, who could care less who you are, when you could be slaying Overlords.

He embodies Blitz's darkest side and tempts him to give in to it. For example, he backs Blitz up in his fight with Fizz over Royal Demons:

Striker: As far as I'm concerned, you two are BOTH embarrassments to our kind for meddlin' with blue-bloods to begin with. But at least loud-mouth here has the sense to only fuck his rich bitch, instead of bein' a little purse dog. Blitzo: Oh, great. The fuckin' supremacist is on my side, wonderful. Fizzarolli: Neither of you filth bags know what you're even talkin' about. If you think you're superior to ANYONE, then you're no better than any royal— Striker: DON'T. You. Dare… Finish that sentence, clown…

And let's say it is not by chance Striker is burnt and probably gets some scars the same episode it is revealed Blitz accidentally set his family circus on fire:

He is clearly meant to embody the anti-theme, both when it comes to relationships and classism. He is who Blitz might become, if he gave in to his worst instincts. That is why he is the character physically threatening Stolas's life and calling him out on his privilege at the same time:

Striker: YOU. Don't get to talk over me! I don't have to listen to your bullshit! All you royals ever do is try to talk over us!

He challenges Stolas to see the darkness in Blitz he keeps ignoring. Moreover, Striker's attempt on Stolas only works because Blitz himself does not warn Stolas, believing that with his powers the goetia can easily survive an imp's attack:

Blitzo: Stolas got what? How?… He can get hurt?

In short, Striker is a key character for both Blitz and Stolas. That said, he does foil also Moxxie and Millie. (Which is why they get to fight him twice, just like Blitz - they lose the first time and win the second).

In his debut episode, he is openly juxtaposed to Moxxie. He is the ideal imp, the one Millie's parents would have liked their daughter to marry. He is a great farmer and an even better fighter. He is strong and charming and easily defeats Moxxie at everything, even music. That said, it turns out Moxxie is a far better person and husband and gets to call out Millie's parents on it, gaining their respect in the process:

Moxxie: Y'know, she protected me. And maybe I'm not a strong beefy dickhead, but Millie has the strength enough for both of us! You two are getting on her case about being hurt by a psychopath you hired?! Shaaaaame on you!

Ghostf***ckers instead makes Striker and Millie's foiling obvious. Both are wrathian assassins, who work as goons for others:

Millie: Not exactly a shortage of imp assassins in Wrath. Reputation is everything.

Here lies Striker's contradiction. He keeps saying he hates the hierarchy, but in the end he acts exactly as society expects him to:

Stolas: Well, you seem to be forgetting; you are working for a royal right now!

He hates royals, but takes orders from them. Even when he decides to leave Wrath, he goes to Greed, so exactly where "imps able to make a buck are welcome", according to Millie:

Crimson: HEY! Hick-for-hire! I said watch 'em, not fuck 'em. Keep ya hands off the merchandise!

See? Striker acts like some big shot, but in the end he operates within the system, rather than subverting it. Both Fizz and Blitz are far more successful at overcoming the hierarchy than he is. Fizz does not take orders from royals, but becomes a romantic and business partner to one. Blitz does not resort depending on royals or imps for his job. Rather, he takes orders only from himself and invents a new business.

Striker says not everyone gets the chance to live in Pride:

Striker: Look. Not every ring is some fancy-ass city, with some fancy-ass mansion, that only fancy-ass royals get to live in. Some of us have hard lives to live.

And yet, he is offered it by Blitz, just like Millie:

Blitzo: Isn't this guy great? It's gonna be nice workin' with him. Yeaaaah! I asked him if he wants to join I.M.P.

If he had joined IMP, he could have found a family, a strong business partner and could have embraced a new life. He did not and became IMP's enemy instead. On the contrary, Millie did and is now a happier and better person.

WHAT ABOUT LOONA?

Personally, I think Loona is gonna be key in Blitz's development, as both her past, arc and relationship with her dad are very well set up. If Moxxie focuses on relationships, whereas Millie on classism, Loona will probably offer a synthesis of both themes:

Loona is Blitz's adoptive daughter and the first member of his new found family.

Loona is a hellbound, so a demon even lower than imps.

I am very curious to see how her story develops and I am looking forward to discover more about her past and to see if her foiling with Bee gets explored more. After this episode I am more curious than ever!

[maxdibert]

The sad thing is that we don’t even get to see any uncomplicatedly happy memories of his innocent childhood friendship with Lily. There’s this pervasive sense from the start of that chapter that JKR thinks that even 9 year old Lily was too good for him (the horrid judgemental use of the word ‘greedy’ and that quote she once gave where she said Snape’s tragedy was that he was drawn to but couldn’t emulate Lily’s innate goodness makes me hurl - what was so innately different about them aged 9 other than her good looks and middle class parents?) and so every single scene is her chastising him for something or other. Like she couldn’t allow saintly Lily to be seen as genuinely choosing and enjoying the company of someone as prickly and offputting as Snape, so she time skips 5 years and just tells us instead of showing us that they’re best friends. Unfortunately by failing to show any gentle, unspoiled moments the whole thing comes off like Lily sees him as a charity case she condescends to hang out with on occasion, while Severus fails to get the picture that clinging hard to someone who doesn’t want that is always going to end in a toxic place for both parties. Sorry for the super long post! It’s just rare to find someone who doesn’t buy into JKR’s intended reading of the Potter parents.

This is quite an interesting topic because even years ago, when I re-read the series at 19 or 20 and was quite involved in political groups and unions at university, I got the impression that Rowling creates a world where classism is constantly justified unless you are on the side of the bad guys. That is to say, Draco being a classist is wrong because he’s Draco, and he’s bad, and he’s Slytherin. But then you have quite a few characters who have clear classist attitudes and nothing happens because they are part of the heroes of the story, and so we’re going to completely overlook it. For example, Sirius is a classist; he always has been and even has nothing against slavery and treats his house-elf like rubbish. He doesn’t even consider him a conscious and independent living being; he’s just a bug to him. The Weasleys have a clear class resentment; they are humble and are sold to us as open-minded and tolerant people, but the reality is that if someone doesn’t fit into their narrow standards of “goodness,” they shut down and are just as petty and prejudiced as any blood supremacist. The best example of this is how the Weasley women treat Fleur simply because, instead of being a humble pick-me girl, she’s posh. But the fact is that Fleur has done absolutely nothing wrong for Ginny and Molly to treat her that way; her only sin is being beautiful and feminine, end of story. It’s supposed to be a story to learn that prejudices are wrong, but Hermione spends her life labelling other girls like the Patils or Lavender (before Lavender gets involved with Ron) as frivolous because they like doing things that are traditionally classified as feminine, which reveals that Rowling has quite a few prejudices against certain groups of women and their attitudes, stemming from a clear internalised misogyny that is present throughout the novel. You only have to look at how she glorifies motherhood as the pinnacle of female fulfilment and the real way to become a moral and brave example within the saga (Lily and Molly, Narcissa being redeemed ONLY because she loves her son) compared to the female characters who either haven’t seen motherhood as a dream come true (Merope Gaunt) or who have no children (Bellatrix), who are portrayed as little less than the worst of the worst in the story.

What I mean by this is that Rowling has quite a significant cognitive dissonance when it comes to establishing the moral values of the story. Because this is not A Song of Ice and Fire; it’s not a multi-voiced story with various perspectives from which you can develop your own complex criteria. It’s a story told from a single point of view where the dichotomy between good and evil is a central point of conflict, but is often blurred by quite a few contradictions that have no explanation, not even theoretically. I mean, the social themes in this story are terribly mismanaged and portrayed in a very superficial way. In the end, the conclusion you draw is that Gryffindor’s mission, the Order, or Harry’s is basically to defeat Voldemort to continue preserving the same status quo in which the magical world has always been immersed, with no intention of going to the root of the problems and taking action for real change. But well, we’re talking about a story written by a woman who turns her protagonist into the magical equivalent of a cop. I mean, LOL. I mean, ACAB, what can I say.

I say all this because when we talk about James and Lily, all of this applies in the same way. James and Lily make no sense. James and Lily are an example of what should NOT be done when writing a script, for instance. In screenwriting, the premise is always show, don't tell. But Lily and James are purely the tell. Lily and James are known for what other characters tell us about them, totally subjective characters, especially those who were friends with the couple. They are presented as great heroes when the reality in canon is that they did nothing. They joined the Order, were in it for a year, and then spent a year and a half holed up at home with their child, then they died, and that’s it. They can be treated as something tragic, but heroic? I wouldn’t say so.

They are also shown as paradigms of "the good ones," of the "correct morality," especially Lily, who is basically the Virgin Mary of this story and seems to have no flaws at all. But the reality is that if we go to canon, everything Lily does is a constant failure. Lily is condescending to Severus from the very beginning, probably because he is poorer than she is. Then she treats him as a charity case, which is already annoying her because he’s too geeky, odd, and marginal, causing her problems in her social circles. Then she half-smiles at his abuser while he is mistreating and humiliating him in front of the entire school. And then she marries that abuser. You can tell me whatever you want about Lily Potter, but what you’re showing me is rubbish, and if you show me rubbish but tell me wonderful things, there’s something that doesn’t add up, and for me, that’s the greatest failure of all.

If I have to be honest, I go back to what I mentioned before: for me, Lily had a huge inferiority complex. She felt inferior in the Muggle world because perhaps she wasn’t poor, but her family didn’t live in a good area either; they were probably lower middle class, without status or a promising future. At Hogwarts, she felt inferior for being the daughter of Muggles, so throughout her life, she secretly wanted to be part of the elite, to stand out, to be popular, to be seen as something important. That a boy like James Potter—handsome, wealthy, popular, with pure-blood status—would take an interest in her never displeased her. Deep down, she liked it; it was what she wanted. In the end, she gave in and married him, and she was probably very happy with her decision because that way, she ended up at the pinnacle of the social ladder. Of course, she liked James deep down for a long time; as Rowling once said. She liked what James represented, what he could mean for her. She would no longer just be the good student, pretty, nice, and popular; she would also have one of the most popular boys in school as a partner, who was also rich and of pure blood. I think that deep down, she and Petunia are quite similar in that regard, both seeking social ascent, each in their own way. After all, they were sisters.

[herbofgraceandpeace]

Re: Flavian’s outburst to Christopher about how he (Christopher) has been an unfeeling, stuck-up brat—Flavian’s not exactly right or wrong here. I think Jones is demonstrating that Christopher is so caught up in his (very real) powerlessness to control his situation, he doesn’t realize that he DOES have the power to really and truly hurt others. He’s so caught up in his own misery that he (selfishly) forgets that others might be miserable too.

This is part of growing up! Christopher hasn’t really been taught empathy, and he hasn’t really had it modeled for him either, outside of Tacroy caring for him, but that doesn’t excuse his behavior. He’s so focused on how the people at the castle aren’t caring for his conscious wants that he entirely ignores the ways they ARE intentionally and deliberately attempting to care for him (I think at least a little classism privilege is at play in him ignoring the maids—he’s only ever known his parents’ mistreatment of servants, but presumably he should have been paying attention to how the castle folk treat the maids differently)

However, I think the adults at Chrestomanci Castle are guilty of the exact same kind of blindness and self-focus as Christopher. They HAVEN’T been meeting his needs emotionally (which has led to their inability to physically protect him either), and whatever their intentions throughout his stay, they did not try to get to know or understand Christopher as a person at his arrival, and they’re paying for that first impression. He’s a CHILD. a child from an unloving and neglectful home, who’s just been ripped away from his friends and his home at school, a child’s just DIED for the second time, and he’s a child with hopes and dreams and self-will, all of which have just been casually, thoughtlessly stripped from him. The castle folk are so focused on their OWN need of a successor for Gabriel that they treat Christopher as an object to be formed to meet their needs instead of a person with needs of his own. They’re so focused on their search for the Wraith and the hell he’s wreaking on others that they miss the very real hell they’re imposing on Christopher. All of their attempts at care are based solely on their perception of what he SHOULD need and want because! They never! Ask him! What he needs or wants!!!!!

What’s that post about how some people act like “if you don’t give me the respect I think I deserve as an authority figure, I won’t give you the respect you deserve as a person”? I think that’s basically how the otherwise decent and well-meaning adults of Chrestomanci Castle treat little Christopher Chant. Confident in their own virtue, they presume that of course this boy who doesn’t know them will trust them immediately. Confident in their work for the greater good, they are indifferent to the suffering of the individual before them. It’s clear that they care about him and his well-being, but without treating him like a real person at all, and it’s never more obvious than in the scene where Gabriel takes his spare life away. They are taking tangible, drastic steps to protect him because they are very worried on his behalf, but throughout the whole process they have no real knowledge of the horror and terror he is experiencing because they are too busy making choices for him to ask him why he’s making the choices he does (and again, Christopher doesn’t TRUST them. But they never empathize with him enough to realize that.) Another example is how Miss Rosalie and the others keep chasing Throgmorton away from Christopher when he’s laid up. They’re so focused on how uncomfortable Throgmorton makes them feel that they don’t care at all they’re isolating Christopher and depriving him of his only companionship.

But none of their bad conduct exonerates Christopher of Flavian’s charges of being rude and unfeeling towards them, even though Flavian is STILL presuming to know and understand Christopher’s motivations and choices despite being completely in the dark about them. The very personhood Christopher wants the others to acknowledge in him is the reason that Christopher is responsible for his own actions towards the castle folk.

And that’s the tea on human responsibility in The Lives of Christopher Chant. (thanks for coming to my ted talk)

[cupofteainme]

So many weird choises with the social media plot. It didn't work for me for three reasons.

First: It's stupid

The royal court left Simon and Wille completely alone to deal with the media. The court with a massive PR-team relies on the troubled 16-year-old prince to keep his boyfriend's social media behavior in check. Okay. I guess everyone in the court were busy trying to bring some life into Ludvig while Kristina was too sad and no-one thought to give her pills before episode six 🥲 (good thing that hearing how bad parent she is cured her depression)

I read a theory that leaving Wille to handle Simon's social media was intentional on the court's part to drive a wedge between Wille and Simon. It's a good theory if you believe in the evil monarchy (I guess Lisa does). I didn't see any indication about it in the show though. In episode 3 after Simon posts the First of May photo, Farima tells Wilhelm, "Talk to him. Or we will." This makes me think that it was Wilhelm and Simon in the first place who denied the court to have any contact with Simon. That I can believe at some level.

Simon would want his autonomy, but I don't understand his naivety concerning social media, especially since he recently was a victim of a grave online violation and got unwanted attention because of it. I assumed that he was already laying low in regards to social media after the sex video.

Wille was trying to talk to Simon about not posting with sensitivity and he apologises that Simon must do accomodations because of his Crown Prince status. Why didn't Simon listen at all?

Second: It doesn't fit the narrative

I have a hard time understanding why Simon felt so erased after deleting his social media. It was never established in YR universe that social media meant so much to Simon unlike in the case of Felice, for whom it played a big part in season one. She used it to create a version of herself that she felt other people wanted to see. In YR posting on social media has often been about conveying an image: Felice at the stables despite not wanting to ride, August posing at the gym while suffering from eating disorder. It didn't fit the show's use of social media that an authentic person like Simon would feel so sad about deleting his account.

I got the impression that Simon used little social media. It was implied that it was for example his first song that he posted (he got a comment that was surprised he could sing). So social media hadn't been an outlet where he commonly shared his creativity. Simon seemed to be sorry to delete pictures of people he saw all the time anyway, family and close friends. It's not good storytelling that we didn't see any foreshadowing about Simon's feelings towards social media earlier in the show. 

Third: It breaks my heart

The part that actually makes me cry is that it was established in season one that Wille and Simon truly see each other despite their differences. Wille was the first one in Hillerska to treat Simon friendly and be interested in him and it made Simon feel special and seen. In the same way Simon saw Wilhelm as a person first rather than a prince. Isn't that a big part why we fell in love with their love? Isn't Wille the person that makes Simon feel seen and not strangers in his social media? 😭

There where so many things that created or could have created drama between them; the drugs, August, Micke, their different backgrounds, homophobia, classism. I don't think that Simon posting was a needed storyline in the show.

Sorry to be a complete romantic, but the way Simon looks at Wille from season one—I thought he'd happily toss his phone to the lake to finally be with this boy.

[spineless-lobster]

In lieu of @motions1ckn3ss ‘s absolutely WONDERFUL essay about ellwood’s relationship with poetry, I’ve been inspired to post my history essay that analyzes the way WWI is shown in In Memoriam! (Strap in this will be long lol)

Nothing Is Worth This: How In Memoriam Portrays WWI

Alice Winn’s debut novel In Memoriam is a hidden gem amongst the growing popularity of historical fiction. Published in 2023, the novel follows the lives of English schoolboys Henry Gaunt and Sidney Ellwood. As the First World War breaks out in 1914, they face two battles; the Western Front and their growing feelings for each other. Together they watch as friends die around them, and as the war changes their lives forever.

The novel explores tumultuous conditions soldiers faced in the trenches, such as mud, poor rations, and gas attacks. Classism, social dynamics during WWI, attitudes towards homosexuality, and trauma are also touched on.

When one thinks of trenches, the first image that comes to mind is likely muddy, rat-infested mazes that snake around a war-torn No Man’s Land. Winn perfectly portrays the horrors of trench warfare throughout the novel, one notable interaction is from a letter Gaunt sends to Ellwood when he reaches the front:

“I throw myself to the ground, and the mud is foul. It’s not like mud, Elly, it’s cursed. It’s– Like everything else, I can’t explain” (Winn, 35).

There is no greater example of the terror of mud in the Western Front than the fields of Passchendaele. In August of 1917, Belgium saw unprecedented amounts of rain which led to treacherous conditions. Bombardier JW Palmer, 26 Brigade Royal Field Artillery, writes in his account:

“It was mud, mud, everywhere: mud in the trenches, mud in front of the trenches, mud behind the trenches. Every shell hole was a sea of filthy oozing mud. I suppose there is a limit to everything but the mud of Passchendaele – to see men keep on sinking into the slime, dying in the slime – I think it absolutely finished me off” (Battersby).

One of the most dreaded side effects of mud was trench foot, an infection that ravaged soldiers. It is caused by prolonged exposure in cold, damp and unsanitary conditions. Symptoms include swelling, numbness, blotchy skin, and if it develops enough, blisters and dying skin tissue (CDC).

When not on the battlefield, men were treated to daily food rations. Rations in the trenches consisted of corned beef, bread, plum and apple jam, tea, whiskey and rum. Water was often disinfected with chlorine and had a chemical aftertaste. The novel discusses food supply on both the British and German sides, and even touches on food shortages throughout the rest of Europe. A scene where Ellwood and Gaunt’s sister, Maud, eat at a cafe details the pitiable amount of butter on their scones. At the front, flies and rats infested everything, eating the men’s rations and spreading disease. British infantryman Victor Silvester wrote in his diary:

“That night I had been asleep in a dugout [for] about three hours when I woke up feeling something biting my hip. I put my hand down and my fingers closed on a big rat. It had nibbled through my haversack, my tunic and pleated kilt to get at my flesh. With a cry of horror I threw it from me.” (Hamilton, 18).

A few passages in the novel are dedicated to the conditions of the food. Often it is writtens in a way that a reader may interpret as gallows humour.

“The flies plagued them, feasting on the dead and then coming to sit amicably on the men’s rations. They got stuck in the jam, which was always plum and apple […] As to apples, the sour, fly-covered substance that they ate with bread at five each evening had as little relation to them as the ‘meat cutlets’ had to meat” (Winn, 91).

“‘D’you want a cup of tea?’

‘Will it taste of disinfectant?’

‘’Fraid so.’

‘Well, better have it all the same’” (Winn, 95).

It is often described that soldiers had two emotions at the front: boredom and terror. One of the harbingers of terror included poison gas. First used at the Second Battle of Ypres on 22 April 1915, the Allies were devastated by the chlorine gas that was unleashed in unprecedented quantities by the Germans.

The British then managed to use gas at the Battle of Loos, prompting both sides to develop protections against gas attacks. These defences started out as cotton pads covering their mouths, soaked in chemicals–or in desperate situations, urine–and goggles to protect their eyes. Throughout the war the makeshift masks developed into more sophisticated gas masks.

The brutality of poison gas in warfare was so acute that it was outlawed by the Geneva Protocol in 1925. Just ten years after its initial use. Renowned poet Wilfred Owen captures the trauma of gas in his famous poem Dulce Et Decorum Est.

“Gas! GAS! Quick, boys!—An ecstasy of fumbling/Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time,/But someone still was yelling out and stumbling/And flound’ring like a man in fire or lime.—/Dim through the misty panes and thick green light,/As under a green sea, I saw him drowning” (Owen, 9-14).

A similarly moving passage is found within the novel, when Gaunt is faced with Algerian soldiers fleeing from gas at Ypres.

“More Algerians came flooding by. Some were only choking, but others were coughing up scrambled bits of lung, their lungs were melting inside them and drowning them” (Winn, 75).

Gaunt continues to reflect on the effect colonialism has on war and the useless attempts to try and make war ‘civilised’ by using laws such as the Hague Convention, which are so easily ignored.

“We swarmed through Africa and America because we were better than they, of course we were, we were making war humane, and now it has broken down and they are dragged into hell with us. We have doomed the world with our advancements, with our democracy that is so much better than whatever they thought of, with our technology that will so improve their lives, and now Algerian men must choke to death on their own melted insides in wet Belgian trenches” (Winn, 75).

Empires such as Britain invaded countless countries, stealing their resources and enslaving people. They exploited those countries so they had to rely on their economy, and used it to justify their ownership. All because they believed that they were more civilised than everyone else; despite the ungodly circumstances modern warfare put soldiers in.

Winn captures the grime, fear and misery that comes with living in the trenches. From vivid descriptions of shellfire and gas, to the bland and occasionally humorous details regarding a soldier’s diet. Undoubtedly, one can imagine themselves slogging through the muddied land of war-torn Belgium with each turn of a page.

Moreover, one theme that is prevalently explored throughout the novel is classism and how it affects soldiers during the war. Gaunt and Ellwood come from privileged backgrounds, going to a public school called Preshute and immediately receiving their commission when they enlisted. When writing to Gaunt, Ellwood discussed how he was even able to choose his own regiment.

“When we next meet I shall be a second lieutenant in the Royal Kennet Fusiliers, Third Battalion. I’m glad I was able to pick my regiment! (It’s all about who you know)” (Winn, 80).

Having connections with the higher class means receiving certain privileges that others don’t have access to. Officers frequented the same upper class social circles, due to there being so few prestigious universities in England. Favours for friends or family members was extremely common and gave commissioned officers opportunities that weren’t available to the working class.

By contrast, they meet a fellow junior officer Lieutenant David Hayes, who did not come from a rich background. Throughout the book his uniform is described as poorly fitting, due to his inability to afford a proper tailor. Hayes quickly becomes friends with Gaunt but is wary of Ellwood, the stark contrast between their socioeconomic positions leading to a strained relationship.

“‘I say, is it really true he was a factory worker before all this?’

‘He’s awfully sharp, isn’t he?’

‘Do you think he’d take offence if I recommended him a new tailor?’

‘Yes,’ said Ellwood, flatly” (Winn, 269).

“‘Said it’s a stone ginger.’

‘...Translate,” Gaunt said to Hayes, as they climbed into the train carriage. Hayes understood Cockney and trench slang far better than the public school officers did” (Winn, 120).

“I’ve been made captain. Seems a well-tailored uniform and the right accent make me a better candidate than Hayes, despite his years of experience” (Winn, 77).

Additionally, Gaunt writes in a letter that one of their schoolmates would hypothetically refer to Hayes as a “temporary gentleman.” This phrase was used throughout WWI and continued into the interwar period and WWII. The phrase refers to non-commissioned officers who gained a temporary commission for the duration of the war, especially if they came from outside the upper class.

“He’s what someone like Burgoyne would call a ‘temporary gentleman’ (disgusting term), that is to say, he was a factory worker in Lewisham before he joined the War” (Winn, 40).

Gaunt continues further, noting that lower-class officers related more to the men, and were more effective on the battlefield. While both Gaunt and Ellwood know that Hayes is a more than capable officer, Hayes recognizes that due to his class, it is unlikely he will ever be promoted to captain.

Life in the trenches caused a mixing of race, class, religions, etc. Before the war, commissioned officers were upperclassmen who were educated in public schools and universities, sometimes coming from previous military backgrounds. The ideal “officer material” of the time was more akin to the “perfect gentleman” than a skilled soldier. When the war started, junior officers had an extremely high mortality rate. Officer training schools could not keep up with the demand, so soldiers and NCOs were promoted and received commissions (Root, 3-4).

English poet Robert Graves wrote about his wartime experiences in his autobiography Goodbye To All That. He details that certain social manners and behaviours among officers were more relaxed than in civilian life. Graves was also an instructor at an Officer Cadet Battalion in 1916, in order to train new officers. All recruits were treated and trained equally, and though he disparages that many men lacked the proper manners; he understands that this new way of training was considerably more effective (Root, 5).

“Their greater efficiency in action amply compensated for their deficiency in

manners” (Root, 5).

Another famous war poet from the time, Siegfried Sassoon, had a similar view. However, he held greater scorn for the lower class officers. In May of 1916 he wrote in his diary:

“Of all the officers having dinner, I saw no face with any touch of distinction in it. They were either utterly commonplace or self-satisfied, or else tired-looking, feeble, goggle-eyed, or otherwise deficient. Why does one see so few proper-looking officers?” (Root, 6).

But he also found that some commissioned officers had acute character flaws. Such as an interaction he had with an officer who was constantly drunk and “quite irresponsible and not trustworthy.” Thus, we can see how life on the frontline can blur the lines between classes. Men judged each other on their personal merit rather than their alma mater.

With much more relaxed ideas of social responsibility being so prevalent amongst soldiers, it allowed for more men to engage in relationships that were heavily frowned upon at the time.

In Memoriam is a love story first. Gaunt and Ellwood spend a large amount of the novel pining for one another, understanding the great amount of risk that comes with pursuing such a relationship. Ellwood is more outwards with his homosexuality, he is revered throughout the school and is able to get away with more risky behaviours. This is opposed to Gaunt who keeps any sort of interaction of that nature a secret. The politics of homosexuality in public schools at the time are explored in the novel and are indeed quite interesting, but it differs from attitudes in the trenches.

During the early 1900s, homosexuality was at the forefront of moral panic. Public trials from previous years such as that of Oscar Wilde and the Eulenburg Affair brought a topic that was usually brushed aside into the spotlight. Homosexuality was punished with jail time and years of hard labour under the Gross Indecency Law. Alongside that was social discrimination and the loss of reputation amongst family and loved ones.

In the late 1800s, Germany had a large scandal known as the Eulenburg Affair. Members of Kaiser Wilhelm II’s cabinet were outed for being gay, resulting in several trials and court-martials. As a result of this public scandal, the British found homosexual acts to be ‘unpatriotic’ and associated with German sympathies (McGhee).

Within the British army, punishments for homosexuality included court martialing, loss of rank, and imprisonment. “Cashiering” was a humiliation ritual that was performed when an officer was dismissed for scandalous misconduct. It involved ripping off insignias, badges and other symbols in front of other officers (Bronskill). This concern is portrayed in the novel by characters such as John Maitland, who warns Gaunt about his letters between Ellwood, and Hayes who warns Ellwood about his behaviour with a lower ranking soldier.

“‘Shut up. I’m not reporting you. I’m trying to help. Can’t you see that if you let Sidney write this sort of letter, you’ll get him imprisoned?’” (Winn, 66).

“‘Do you know what would happen if someone caught you and him? They’d say he assaulted you. That it was all his fault. He’d be court-martialed and shot so fast for daring to besmirch his precious public school captain—’ Ellwood stared at Hayes. It hadn’t occurred to him, any of it” (Winn, 192-3).

Despite all of this, the trenches fostered a culture of male affection that was able to be masked within the realm of hyper-masculinity and the guise of being bonded by war. Figures such as Robert Graves, Siegfried Sassoon (who were the inspirations for Gaunt and Ellwood), E.M. Forster, Ethel Mary Smyth and Wilfred Owen all served in WWI and are widely understood to be a part of the LGBTQ+ community. Attitudes towards homosexuality on the front varied. In rare cases some men were able to come out to their comrades, being met with acceptance. But generally it was frowned upon.

The very foundation of an effective army is camaraderie, and when men are facing constant traumas together a kind of brotherhood is formed. These homosocial behaviours allowed for more physically affectionate relationships. Even heterosexual men found these special friendships to be a relief from the stresses of war.

“Thomas Kühne has argued, men celebrated the “softer” side of comradeship, including bonds of love and friendship that sustained them in the other-worldly environment of the trenches” (Crouthamel).

Within these bonds, homosexual men were able to find an avenue for building lasting romantic and sexual relationships with other men under the guise of it being platonic. The novel delves into these kinds of relationships in passages such as a scene in the officer’s train carriage. We see it again in a discussion between Gaunt and Ellwood about using a sexual relationship to distract them from the war.

“Ellwood’s head drooped onto Gaunt’s shoulder. Gaunt stiffened, but when he looked around the carriage, he saw that the other officers were all in physical contact with one another. Huxton had his feet in Hayes’ lap. Hayes rested his head against the arm of an officer from C Company. Men sprawled all over each other. In the hyper-masculine atmosphere of war, they were not overly concerned with manliness” (Winn, 120).

“‘Did it help you forget about the War?’ pressed Ellwood. Gaunt nodded once, jerkily.

‘Well, then.’

‘And after the War? asked Gaunt.

‘It’ll be as if it never happened. I promise.’

‘You promise, do you?’

‘Yes. It doesn’t mean anything, Henry. Only that we want to forget things, once in a while” (Winn, 108).

Letters were another way for men to bond with one another, though it was a hazardous form of communication. Officers would read through letters and censor them before they were sent. If any illegal actions were mentioned the sender or recipient was at risk of being reported. Wilfred Owen’s letter to his cousin in 1918 reflects this anxiety:

“There are two French girls in my billet…Naturally I talk to them a good deal; so much so that the jealousy of other officers resulted in a Subalterns' Court Martial being held on me! The dramatic irony was too killing, considering certain other things, not possible to tell in a letter” (The Week).

A particularly striking scene in In Memoriam touches on this topic.

“He lifted the cover and looked at the first sheet of paper, instantly recognizing Gaunt’s neat blue handwriting: My dearest, darling Sidney,” (Winn, 189).

After the war, Germany had a spark in their gay rights movement. Many men felt that they had fought the war for nothing, with gay men knowing that they fought for a country that did not allow them rights as citizens (Marhoefer). Men used their military service as a reason to be accepted into society, showing it as proof of their patriotism and dedication to their country.

Magnus Hirschfeld opened his Institut für Sexualwissenschaft (Institute for Sexual Science), which pushed for the rights of LGBTQ+ individuals and was one of the pioneers of gender-affirming surgery. The Scientific Humanitarian Committee was one of the leading gay rights groups in the world during that time. This progress continued throughout the interwar period, with Weimar Germany becoming a hotspot for LGBTQ+ individuals. Berlin’s nightlife thrived with gay clubs before the Nazi party rose to power.

Near the end of the novel, Gaunt’s sister Maud explains how she is moving to Berlin to study at the Scientific Humanitarian Committee and encourages Gaunt and Ellwood to visit. She even mentions Paragraph 175, which was a law criminalising homosexuality in Germany. Paragraph 175 wouldn’t be abolished until 1994.

“The Weimar Republic is more open to progress than the governments of Englnd and France. I know you miss Europe. I hope you miss me. I cannot say whether Paragraph 175 will be revoked this year, or this decade, but I can tell you that there is a world for you and Sidney here. There has never been a movement like this before” (Winn, 371).

As previously mentioned, men used close intimate connections to deal with the trauma of war, but the rest of the world was less kind to those relationships. Similarly, those struggling with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder also faced social ridicule. PTSD, formerly known by many names such as shellshock, war neurosis and combat fatigue, was seen as a new phenomenon amongst men returning from war. Despite this view, soldiers from across history had suffered from the psychological effects of warfare. About 80 000 British soldiers suffered from shellshock after the First World War. There is a wide variety of symptoms but prominent ones include tremors, nightmares, insomnia, anxiety, flashbacks, amnesia and paralysis (Jewell). The effects of trauma are heavily explored in the novel, with Gaunt suffering from vivid nightmares and insomnia and Ellwood undergoing a complete change in personality after the war.

“Gaunt never seemed to sleep. Sometimes Ellwood would return to the dugout to find him lying on his wire bench, candlelight glinting in his bloodshot eyes” (Winn, 93).

“Ellwood did not say anything. He could not explain why that drop of blood on his mother’s finger had so appalled him, when he had seen West’s brain pulse with his last heartbeats and felt nothing except dispassionate curiosity” (Winn, 181).

Charles Myers, one of the first to write about shellshock, theorised that exposure to explosive blasts caused a form of brain trauma that aligned with the symptoms. After various tests, his ideas were disproven. As PTSD became less linked with physical injury, it became closer associated with cowardice (McDonald et al.).

At the time, a large ideal men strived for, especially amongst the upper class, was fulfilling the idea of bravery. The widows of men who were executed for cowardice often weren’t financially compensated. The ideal soldier at the time was one who would fight ‘for King and Country’ and a large amount of shame was put on those who, quite naturally, fled during the line of fire.

Cowardice is shown on multiple occasions in the novel. One officer by the name of Carrington suffers from severe PTSD, being shown screaming in the faces of other soldiers and having bouts of paralysis. He’s ashamed of his unwanted behaviour and confesses to Ellwood through tears about his cowardice.

“Ellwood threatened to shoot him if he didn’t get up. Carringon tried and collapsed again. Ellwood trained his pistol at his head.

‘You’d better do it.’ said Carrington. ‘I’m a dreadful coward. I know I am.’

[...]

‘There’s nothing wrong with his legs, he just wants to go home!’

‘I do,’ said Carrington, miserably. ‘I do want to go home. I know that’s shameful.’

[...]

Carrington was taken away, whispering ‘I’m a dreadful coward!’ in between spasms” (Winn, 187).

“Don’t know if you heard that Lantham was shot by firing squad. Anyone could see he had neurasthenia; it’s a scandal, but he didn’t go over the top on July 1st, so General Haig signed off” (Winn, 323).

Due to misconceptions at the time, doctors tried many different ineffective and harmful treatments for shellshock. One famous treatment is electroshock therapy. Electroshock therapy was used for a variety of mental disorders throughout the 20th century. Painful electric shocks were administered to the head and neck, in hopes of treating symptoms. These treatments were undergone without any anaesthetic, and often it did not relieve all of the symptoms (McDonald et al.).

Today we have electroconvulsive therapy, which uses controlled shocks on certain parts of the brain to induce seizures in order to treat mental illnesses such as severe depression and bipolar disorder (Psychiatry.org). These treatments are done under anaesthetic and in controlled environments, with studies proving it to be effective.

More often than not, soldiers would self-medicate their symptoms, leading to alcoholism and substance abuse. Alcohol was already offered to soldiers, and drugs such as morphine and cocaine were used during treatments or to boost morale and performance (Kamieński).

“‘Bring out the whiskey,’ said Gaunt, as he did at every meal. Daniels twisted his hands.

‘There’s only one more bottle, sir.’

‘What’s happened to them all? Have you been at them?’

‘No, sir! There were seven, and six have been drunk, sir.’

‘By whom?’ demanded Gaunt.

‘Well, sir, there was the one you had on our first day, and two the day Lieutenant Ellwood arrived—’

‘All right, all right, no need to enumerate them like crimes. Fetch the last one, and we’ll have rum tomorrow.’

‘Yes, sir.’ Daniels hurried away” (Winn, 93-94).

Luckily, not all treatments were dangerous or ineffective. An army physician by the name of Arthur Hurst developed talking therapies after the war. His treatments included using films and simulations to reconstruct soldier’s experiences in order to talk them through the traumatic memories. His treatments boasted vastly higher success rates and his focus on treating cognitive and behavioural symptoms was the blueprint for modern PTSD therapy (Butterworth).

In the modern day, there are many effective treatments for PTSD and trauma, but there is still an underlying stigma that prevents people from seeking out proper care for their mental health.

Although In Memoriam is a fictional retelling of real historical events, there is no doubt that Winn put extensive amounts of research into her novel. Her vivid writing style captures the inhumanity of the First World War and its effects on the psyche of characters and the greater world around them. The novel shows us the love between friends, comrades, family and lovers while tackling topics such as classism, trauma, and LGBTQ+ rights through the lense of our schoolboy protagonists; giving us a glimpse into history while telling a compelling story of love, death, and heartbreak.

Works Cited

“An army marches on its stomach.” National Army Museum.

Battersby, Eileen. “Passchendaele: A killing field of mud – The Irish Times.” The Irish Times.

Bronskill, Jim. “WWI: Study details punishment for soldiers' sexuality.” CTV News.

Butterworth, Benjamin Russell. “What World War I taught us about PTSD.” The Conversation.

McGhee, Beth. “Homosexuality in the First World War - WW1 East Sussex.” East Sussex WW1.

Crouthamel, Jason. “Sexuality, Sexual Relations, Homosexuality | International Encyclopedia of the First World War (WW1).” International Encyclopedia of the First World War.

Dwyer, Kassandre. “Trench Warfare in World War I: Rot, Rats, Ruin.” The Collector.

Freedman, Russell. The War To End All Wars: World War I. Clarion Books, 2010.

Hamilton, John. Trench Fighting Of World War I. ABDO & Daughters, 2004.

Kamieński, Łukasz. “Drugs | International Encyclopedia of the First World War (WW1).” International Encyclopedia of the First World War.

Marhoefer, Laurie. “How WWI Sparked the Gay Rights Movement.” Smithsonian Magazine.

McDonald, MaryCatherine, et al. “From shell-shock to PTSD, a century of invisible war trauma.” The Conversation.

Owen, Wilfred, et al. “Dulce et Decorum Est by Wilfred Owen.” Poetry Foundation.

“Psychiatry.org - What is Electroconvulsive Therapy (ECT)?” American Psychiatric Association.

Root, Laura. “Temporary Gentlemen” on the Western Front: Class Consciousness and the British Army Officer, 1914-1918.” UNF Digital Commons.

“Second Battle of Ypres 22 April – 25 May 1915.” Imperial War Museums.

“The secret history of the gay soldiers who served in the First World War.” The Week.

“Trench Foot or Immersion Foot|Natural Disasters and Severe Weather.” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Washington, Nicole. “Shell Shock and PTSD: Connections, Symptoms, Support, More.” Healthline.

Winn, Alice. In Memoriam: A Novel. Alfred A. Knopf, 2023.

[fun-k-board]

How people are treating Hobie Brown, and British punks / people as a whole, reeks of classism, privilege and plain ignorance. It's so painfully obvious when somebody who has no clue about punk history, or even the basic idea of poverty in Britain, writes about or speaks about Hobie and his universe.

Let's also discuss the way people immediately assume Hobie is a thief who has no hygiene, and how that's a god damn issue. There is NO mention in the comics or movie of him not washing himself or being a kleptomaniac, not only that, but aren't wicks hard to maintain? It's obvious he doesn't use 3 in 1.

This assumption of Hobie is racism and that much is obvious, but is also rooted in classist beliefs and common stereotypes about punks used to demonise the movement. People also threw around this 'headcanon' in the first movie with Miles, it's a CLEAR pattern.

Don't even get me started on cishet people in this fandom and how heteronormative / homophobic people are in regards to Hobie. 'B-But Hobies universe is the 70's 🥺🥺 he'd hate gay and trans people...👉👈' Do your god damn research?? The punk and LGBTQ+ movements have always been closely intertwined. I have seen a comic panel where Hobie literally kisses Captain Anarchy, but even if that isn't real and was edited, he is still friends with Captain Anarchy, who's a confirmed gay man.

All in all, please, for the love of god, just treat Hobie Brown like you treat Peter Parker. Treat him like the well written character that he is. He's not some racist, classist stereotype you can push your bigoted beliefs onto.

Just wait until I get onto how misogynistic this fandom is toward Spiderbyte and Spidergwen, don't get me started because I will make another post.

[still-a-morosexual-help]

this is quite ramble tbh but this thought has been sitting in my head for so long. as a poc obey me player i have this little self indulgent scenario where my mc is talking w the brothers and they ask about how mc dealt w all the bs the other demons were giving them about being a human. and my mc is like “racism exists in the human world too??” and it made me think about how out of touch the brothers are from the human world. like do they know anything from the last 500 years of human world?

The funniest thing to me is like yeah there's classism and racism (though I would argue it's more classism than racism) within the demons of the Devildom but it seems to be mostly based on "how able am i to kick your ass" hence the more magically and physically powerful demons end up in higher positions (and this makes much more sense when you learn that the Devildom had no laws until Diavolo's grandfather so it would have very literally been "survival of the fittest")

However if you take out the magical/physical strength factor: demons, as we see in the game, come in all shapes and sizes and from different cultures and are never treated differently based on that eg: the ant sized demons and the nightlantern people

So all I can imagine is demons being like:

Humans discriminate each other based on *rapidly check notes* skin...colour????? and where you come from and what you believe in???? Not on who can knock out the most teeth????????????????

Just absolutely bamboozled by it

Also about knowing what the human world is like, we find out in S3 that at least Mammon has a pretty good idea what the human world is like because of how often he visits it due to running errands for Lucifer, paying debts to the witches, visiting his kid - to the point that he blends in pretty easily unlike some people *cough*Satan*cough*

ALSO ALSO

It's not human world racism but Nightbringer shows that the 7 brothers have a pretty good idea of what racism actually is, given the way they're initially treated by civilians of the Devildom (eg: how they're kicked out of shops) and how they still seem to be treated by the nobility. "Fallen Angel" also seems to be a slur or something similar which I will never get over

We also get to see a lot of racism from the angels towards the demons in S1-4 and vice versa in Nightbringer. Also, of course, keep in mind that the Devildom and the Celestial Realm aren't actually Hell and Heaven and it's not a story of Evil vs. Good, so like Mammon and MC say in Nightbringer there's no actual difference between being an angel or a demon other than living in a strict society vs living in a free/chaotic society

And going on a tangent here because this interests me:

About the Sins vs Nobility and how they treat lesser demons

We never see the Sins, or Diavolo for that matter, treating lesser demons badly despite being some of the most high ranking demons in the realm:

• With Diavolo of course it'd go against his personality to treat them differently

• The second Dames event shows that the Sins seem to have more of a problem with the nobility than anything else

• Which is supported by how against them the nobility are in Nightbringer

• Through Mephisto, in the current time, we see that though this attitude has mellowed out it hasn't completely left

• Despite the Sins and the Nobility generally being in a similar station of power there's a huge difference between their attitudes towards the lesser demons

• Mephisto for instance is so rich that not only is Belphie shocked by it but Mephisto has also never eaten a burger before which is insane

• Meanwhile, all the Sins have frequently held working class jobs, either because they're genuinely trying to earn some money or because they're covering a shift for a friend

• In Nightbringer, despite thinking MC is a lesser demon they're never really treated differently by the Sins. If they are ordered around (which again is very rarely) it's because they're literally working for the Sins and if MC doesn't want to do what they're ordered to they just... don't and they face no consequences. The Sins also acknowledge and respect MC's competence and opinion.

• Meanwhile, in Nightrbringer we see Mephisto (who is literally and narratively a representative of the House of Lords and Nobility) thinking MC's a lesser demon; ignore MC, dismiss their opinion and expect to be shown out of RAD by them without even being asked which heavily implies that due to their perceived difference in position this is MC's duty even if they don't work for Mephisto/Diavolo/RAD

• The Sins seem to see more of themselves in the lesser demons than in the Nobility which makes sense when you consider how they came to the Devildom with nothing, had to rely on Diavolo to survive, still live in what is essentially a RAD dormitory and have to actually work and earn money to buy the things they want

• Whereas, the Nobility are probably demons who had to fight their way to the top long before Diavolo's grandfather introduced the laws and then spent generations at the top, amassing wealth and getting more than used to their set status quo

[frequentderealizationcore]

You asked for jason opinions so rant incoming:

I hatehatehateHATE the bastardization of Jason's robin both in universe and out of it.

How Alfred says"[Jason] was determined to disobey [Bruce]" before jason is even buried??? How Bruce takes Cass to Jason's grave and proceeds to absolutely shit on Jason's memory? The victimblaming??? And how dc resorted to it because otherwise ppl would be like "hey why the FUCK is batman taking on more child soldierssidekicks when the last one died??" So they answered "well jason brought it all on himself. He was reckless and violent and impulsive and disobedient-" LIKE SHUT UPP. Stop it. Why are you soo obsessed w shittalking a dead 14 year old???? Not to mention the CLASSISM. "I adopted Jason to stop him from becoming a criminal" bitch??? A) vigilantism is a crime you dumbfuck. B) Jason had morals long before you came along. He literally says he doesn't want to be a crook and that he steals only what he needs to when he first meets Bruce. But bruce is so convinced that crime=immoral (despite the vigilanitsm) that he latches onto the first impression he had of Jason (some punk STEALING his tires) that hes like "oh jason was always destined to be evil :( red hood proves it :( there was nothing i could have done" makes my blood boil. And then ppl are like "oh bruce is such a good father! Why can't jason see that he loves him smh" like are u fr??? Bruce legit slit jasons neck to save jokers life+ was/is a classist piece of shit to jason+ constantly blamed him for his death (tho this is more editorial but still) sir wtf are you smoking.

You're so right like the way dc had to justify their decisions with jason and they just started victim blaming a fictional child. Like huh?

I hate the way he basically had nothing when he was robin, barely any friends, no team, and no support system. And on top of that like you mentioned, the way they treated his death and memory is so awful, making other characters talk shit about him just because again, they had to justify their decisions with him. When people complain about fanon jason and tim interacting and how tim absolutely hated jason and thought he was a failure I'm like yeah, it's true, and just maybe it's because dc had to prove that this robin is totally different from the past one guys he's so much better his hero was Dick Grayson and he's way more competent than the violent reckless poor jason todd. Not going to talk about the classism because oh boy does that one deserve its own post.

[mothgardens]

i crave a sastiel royalty au.

cause like UGH it could go two ways:

It would be one of those stereotypical balls meant for the princes to meet a court-able companion:

1. Royal Angels!! Princes: Michael, Luke (called Lucifer behind his back for his cruelty), Gabriel, Raphael, and the youngest, Castiel. With unmarried egotistical narcissist King Chuck and his sister Amara in command of the Shurley Kingdom.

In this one, the Royal Family hold a ball for the nearest elite families to join in and mingle with the five heirs to the thrown. But, the Winchester boys, Sam and Dean, who come from a family living in poverty, sneak into the royal party in the fanciest attire they could scrounge up. Castiel takes a liking to the quiet and clumsy boy he finds in the crowd, Sam. Curious because the young prince should know all the families attending, and yet, he doesn’t recognize the handsome attendee in front of him.

Potential Characteristics and Tags: Not slow burn nor fast burn, a steady middle burn. Lots of Pining and Fluffy Flirting. Angst as well <3 Stereotypical Homophobia, Classism, and more :)

2. Royal Winchesters!! Tough and cunning Prince Dean, Knowledgeable and atypical Prince Samuel (commonly called crude names behind his back for his oddity and stubbornness), and youngest, admirable Prince Adam. With King John ruling the Winchester Kingdom.

Similar to the first idea, the Winchesters are also throwing a ball for their heirs to find a suitable girl to be their princess. The goal is to have elite and elegant attendees meet with the princes who are wondering the crowd. Samuel finds himself enthralled with a fellow in a long beige coat across the room. He has never seen this man and he knows better than to show interest in him. So he allows himself to watch the man move about the crowd. He notes his awkward yet endearing tendencies and the absolute pleasure that fills his face when he eats the party treats. Sam falls harder and harder until the man’s friend spots him staring and points straight at him. The beige coat spins as the man follows his friend’s finger and makes eye contact with Sam (oh no, he’s hot). As the two begin to trek through the crowd towards Samuel, he makes a run for it. Guilt and regret follows him through the next few weeks until the next ball where he sees the men again.

Potential Characteristics and Tags: Slow burn and angsty: John and Sam squabbles, Sam feeling outcasted and different. He wants a normal life, not to be royal. Internalized Homophobia, Stereotypical Homophobia (John), maybe some secret nonconformity from Sam gender wise.

[doomalade]

Idk what point exactly I’m going for here but uhhh fuck you Viv

CW: SA, racism, classism, and mentions of suicide

Blitzø:

-Admittedly an asshole at times yes

-single father who cares deeply for his daughter

-lives in a worn down apartment with basically only one room, and he sleeps on the couch so said daughter can have a room to herself

-once more, Loona was about to be kicked out and left to fend for herself due to growing too old in the prison where the most oppressed race in Hell is basically sold off into slavery through “adoption”, but Blitzø did it out of the kindness of his heart so Loona didn’t have to feel the pain that he goes through.

-Put Loona as first priority when it came to her healthcare which is extremely difficult for lower classes to get access to

-Started up his own small business at a great risk all to provide for Loona and his employees that he cares for deeply

-Admittedly a creep and an asshole to the M’s yes

-was basically sold into slavery by his father for like $5, a paper clip, and a wad of gum to Stolas when he was younger

-had feelings for his best friend Fizz growing up before tragically and accidentally causing a fire that destroyed his family’s circus, scarred him and his sister, greatly injured Fizz, and supposedly killed his mother

-had to try and sneak in and steal a Goetia’s Grimmoire at great personal risk of potential death so his company could function and he could provide for those he cared for most

-Got caught and cornered by Stolas, only had sex with Stolas because he was pushed to do it and once more at the risk of being killed and not getting the book

-Constantly belittled and sexually harassed by Stolas and clearly showed extreme frustration and discomfort from it

-Only agreed to the sex deal during a time when he was literally almost about to die (notice a pattern yet?)

-Was humiliated at Ozzie’s and still treated like a little fantasy by Stolas

-still never showed any signs of romantic interest in Stolas

-Panics when Stolas says that he has to return the book, breaks down begging and pleading to do anything if it means he can keep his lively hood going

-Rightfully calls Stolas out on his bullshit when Stolas starts yapping about romance

-Has to deal with a party hosted by an extremely popular pop star that has piñatas of him being hanged and shirts that say “KYS Blitzø”

Meanwhile…

Stolas:

-Born into a rich and wealthy family

-Daddy issues yes

-Forced into a marriage, not even considering how Stella feels about all of it

-Has a daughter, neglects her

-Constantly sexually harasses and belittles Blitzø with comments like “Blitzy” and “my little impish plaything”

-Clearly treats Blitzø not as a person but as a way to get away with a fucked up fetish

-Pays more attention to Blitzø than Octavia

-plays victim, A LOT

-tries gaslighting Blitzø into feeling bad for him

-lies and manipulates Blitzø pretending that he never sexualized him for being an Imp

-“I never looked down on you”, first meeting since they were kids, he literally looks down upon Blitzø

-Still ignores Octavia and goes through with divorcing Stella without caring for the consequences it brings to Stella or Octavia

TLDR:

Blitzø is a hardworking and caring man who loves his daughter and those closest to him and while flawed, always is trying to do what is right.

Stolas: Rich asshole who neglects his daughter, only thinks about himself, and is a manipulative rapist.

Fuck this show, fuck this ship, and fuck you Viv

[cleoluvrr]

The Last Days of Summer XVIII (Rafe Cameron x Heyward!OC)

Warnings: violence, underage drinking, drug use, verbal abuse, jealousy, forbidden relationship, enemies to lovers, kidnapping, gaslighting + manipulation

Synopsis: Stuck in a situation she never dreamed of, Neriah Heyward blurs the line between Kook and Pogue; Rafe Cameron a witness.

masterlist

word count: 5.5k+

↠━ღ◆ღ━↞

“...your little pogue brother and his friends don’t know how to butt out.” 

“I’m sorry about your brother, but he was just collateral damage.”

“You’re really pretty for a stuck up, pogue, bitch, y’know.”

“Poor little Pogue girl can’t remember her place and needs someone to remind her…”

As the hot water rains over my skin and rinses the evidence of the previous days away, I can’t help but to think about all of the times Rafe openly talked about his disdain for the other side of Kildare. I already knew about it, it was impossible not to. He wasn’t the only one like that, however, so I never gave it much weight. 

When you go to school with Kooks, when you run in the same circles as them and hang out at the same spots as them, when you befriend them, you tend to take the casual classism on the chin. You shouldn’t have to do that, but it’s what one does to live a decently pleasant life on Figure-8. 

However, when you make a Kook, the Kook, your boyfriend, you shouldn’t have to do that. You would think that he would accept the fact that you’re not rich, that you live on the other side of the island. You’d think that your Pogue status would be an absolute non-issue, because why else would he make you his girlfriend? You shouldn’t have to take any of the constant quips about your place in the hierarchy of Kildare that you hear from your peers.

And yet, I do.

I think I let myself get too used to it, let my mind become clouded with Rafe’s change in behavior. I let myself believe that he was genuinely trying to become a good person, that he wanted to change for the better. The rose-colored glasses were strapped on tight.

It was hard to let myself think logically about everything when things were moving so fast. He never gave me time to think about what I really wanted to do, but at the end of the day, it was ultimately my choice whether or not I wanted to give Rafe a chance. It was my decision to look past the way he treated me because he gave sweet kisses and promises backed by nothing. The way he treated my brother and his friends.

I think back to a conversation we had when we first began dating, one that should’ve been much more of a red flag than I treated it then.

“I’m also a Pogue.” I point out. He shakes his head again and reaches to twirl the ends of my braids with his finger. “You can pretend that I’m not, but you see what side of town you’re on. And I am also friends with John B in some capacity.”

“You aren’t like them.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” I say scoffing.

“You’re better than them. You’re smart, and kind, and not a criminal.” He explains. “You’re even better than I am, and I love that about you.”

“That doesn’t make me not a Pogue, Rafe.”

“I know that, but you are more than just that.” He places a hand on my cheek softly, thumb caressing the skin beneath it. “So many of them are just that and nothing else. They have nothing going for them. Being born a Pogue isn’t their fault, but they don’t even try to change anything for the better. But you? You want to get the hell off this island and make a life for yourself, and that makes you different.”

I should’ve known by the way he tried his damndest to separate me from the identity of Pogue that it was a bad idea to give him the time of day.

He didn’t like me for me, he liked the idea of me. He picked out the parts of me that he liked the most and decided that was the girl he wanted. 

I felt so stupid for falling for him so quickly. I should’ve been smarter than that, I am smarter than that, but I let my feelings cloud my judgment. The feelings of frustration and anger with my brother for choosing his friends over his blood, the feelings of being doted on in a way that I’ve never experienced. 

I’m not even sure if the moments of vulnerability he shared with me were even real anymore. If he truly wanted to be open with me, or if it was just a manipulation tactic. It’s not like he wasn’t smart enough to do that, he may be mentally unwell but he wasn’t incapable of using my empathetic heart and mind to his advantage.

The betrayal I can take. I can take the manhandling and the yelling, having my autonomy taken away. Crazily enough, I can handle being taken to a remote island against my will to fulfill whatever sick fantasy of a happy family Rafe has dragged me into. The criminal aspect of it all didn’t make me flinch as much as I thought it would.

What I couldn’t take? Watching my brother drive off with his friends and leaving me in the hands of a man on the borderline. That betrayal was something that hurt me almost more than anything else, but I couldn’t even be that mad about it. I betrayed Pope just as much for choosing to even be with Rafe. The situation was complicated.

Rafe’s blatant disregard for the lives of innocent teenagers was the one thing that hurt me more than that. Listening to him brush off the possible death of my brother and his friends, of his own sister, and treat it like it was nothing serious made my stomach churn.

Sighing heavily, I shut off the water in the now lukewarm shower. My skin felt clean but my brain was weighed down by a plethora of thoughts that only brought down my already poor mood.

Rafe wasn’t on the bed when I exited the bathroom, nor was he downstairs when I went to go find something to eat. I hadn’t touched food or water in days and my body was beginning to feel the effects of it, but I didn’t trust that family to throw me a cracker if I were starving to death.

I stole a few days worth of food from the pantries to take back to the room so that I could avoid contact with them for as long as possible. 

I hadn’t left the room more than a handful of times in about a week, not that I could really count the days, and the only contact I had with the outside world was Rafe coming back to shower or sleep. Whenever he did those things I would make my way to the balcony overlooking the yard, avoiding any effort Rafe would make to speak to me.

I’m sure it was beginning to drive both of us crazy. Me because I hadn’t had human contact in possibly over a week and I had nothing to keep me occupied outside of staring out the window for hours or reading the book I packed in my bag over and over. The white walls of the room were beginning to feel less like prison and more and more like an insane asylum.

Rafe, however, was going crazy for a much different reason.

He hated nothing more than when I ignored him, and going a week without my attention while being in the same room as him was starting to have some effects. He would slam every door he used, became short with Wheezie anytime he spoke to her, and he barely treated Rose like a respectable human being anymore. Not that she was, anyway.

I think he spends most of his time at home in his dad’s room. I walked past the room a couple times on my short journeys around the house, the door wide open as he sat next to the unconscious man just watching him. 

It’s hard for me to not feel sad for him. He lost his dad once, though he was alive the whole time, and he might lose him again. If Ward were to never wake up, it would not make my life any worse, but it would probably destroy Rafe. I shouldn’t care about him after everything he did to me, but I do. I wish I was telling the truth when I told him I hate him on that ship, but I wasn’t. 

In the days that I spend alone I often think about what I’d be doing if I hadn't given into Rafe that night. If I told him I couldn’t come over, if I slept in my own bed and woke up the next day in my own room. If I would be eating lunch with my best friends right now, if my parents would yell at me to stop slacking off while working Heyward’s.

I wonder if Rafe and I would have lasted back home. If he never revealed his true self to me, if I would still be head over heels for him. 

I am snapped out of my thoughts by the sound of footsteps thundering through the house. The familiar sound of Rafe’s footsteps stomping up the stairs disturbs my peace as it does a least twice a day.

Rafe left earlier in the day to run off to some mysterious place once again. I’m sure he told me before he went out, but I can never find the energy to listen to him for longer than three seconds before drowning out his voice with my own thoughts. 

The door bangs open suddenly, the loud sound of the knob slamming against the wall making me flinch. My head turns to Rafe annoyedly at the disturbance, but the sight leaves my eyes wide and jaw resting in my lap. I can’t help but to gawk at the blonde, his appearance eliciting a feeling in me I hadn’t experienced in a long time.

“What the fuck?” I say quite loudly. The sound of my voice captures his attention almost immediately, neck nearly snapping to face me completely.

In front of me is a very bald Rafe Cameron, atop his head a fresh buzzcut that was not there this morning. 

“Neriah.” Rafe sounds surprised that I spoke in his presence, as if the sound of my voice is unfamiliar to him.

The strong features of his face are emphasized by his cropped hair, jaw sharp and cheekbones high. He looks much more mature with the haircut, the length of it suits him better than the usual state of his blonde locks. His blue eyes look lighter without his hair overshadowing his face, two perfectly shaped eyebrows framing the sockets they sit in.

Dressed in a pair of vineyard vines shorts and a short-sleeved t-shirt, his tanned arms looked even more bronze than before. The natural tan of his skin brought out from the bright island sun and his long days out of the house. 

I stop my eyes from wandering any further and bring my gaze back up to his face. 

“What the fuck did you do?” 

“I…cut my hair?” He answers, unsure of if that’s the response I was looking for. He closes the door behind him and steps into the room further. My eyes follow him as he approaches the bed cautiously, body tense as if I’m going to lash out and attack him.

“Why?” I study his face again, drawing my lip into my mouth to chew on subconsciously. He stands by his side of the mattress and looks down at my questioning figure, a well-read book resting open in my lap as I lean against the headboard.

He shrugs, eyebrows pulling together in confusion. He reads my face too, well aware of my unmasked ogling. I don’t bother to stop, the part of my brain that instructs me to have some shame long gone. 

“I can’t cut my hair when I want to or something?”

I release my lip from my mouth and purse them together instead. Nodding my head, I drop my eyes back to the book in my lap and pretend to read the page that I had been stuck on for the past thirty minutes. I flip to the next page loudly, the sound of the paper filling the air as it faces the abuse from my irritated fingers.

“I forgot I’m not allowed to speak, sorry.” I say shortly. 

Rafe sighs heavily and runs a hand over his semi-bald head. I feel his eyes on me, his heated gaze leaving my body feeling warm and vulnerable under his watch. Shaking his head, he ignores my comments and walks around the bed to disappear into the bathroom. 

I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Rafe for days. 

My usual daydreams of home had begun to become mixed with flashes of him and his new appearance. I was truly starting to feel just as crazy as him, the once plain, four white walls of the bedroom that I would stare at blankly for hours became blank slate for me to imagine his face plastered all over them. My book was no longer entertaining to me, the words on the off-white pages becoming unrecognizable as they were slowly replaced by Rafe’s name in my unwell mind.

When he would come into the room for a brief shower or a few hours of sleep, I could barely control the urge to keep my eyes off of him. I’m sure he could feel the tension in the air when he exited the bathroom, chest still damp and warm from the shower with a towel draped around his waist. Only when he would enter the closet to dress himself did I allow myself to outwardly react, hands for the nearest pillow to smother myself with silently.

I should have more shame, really. The man abducted me and told me in so many words that he’s glad my brother and his friends might be dead. But he was my boyfriend only a week ago, I can’t pretend I don’t find him attractive. The butterflies that took home in my stomach didn’t just die off because he was no longer in my good graces.

Was my boyfriend…Did we ever technically break up? Sure, I told him I hate him, but we both knew I was lying. No, I don’t particularly care for him right now, but it’s not like my feelings for him just went away.

God, I’m so pathetic.

After that week of silence that I punished Rafe with, I would never know peace again. I was forced to eat at the dining table with everyone else, my self-isolating behavior no longer being tolerated to the extent that I took it. I didn’t mind Wheezie’s presence, and Rose I could ignore like it was my job. 

However, I hated the heat that rose to my face when I would raise my eyes from my dinner plate and catch Rafe already staring at me. I couldn’t focus on anything when his eyes were on me, appetite disappearing immediately when I noticed the feeling of his eyes on me. And it wasn’t only at the dinner table.

While I could just barely keep myself from ogling the eldest Cameron child, he had absolutely no shame. The feeling of someone watching me never went away if we were in the same room.

Like right now, for example. 

I feel Rafe’s burning gaze on the top of my head as he watches me skin over my book for the hundredth time that week. His towering frame leaning against the railing of the balcony on the opposite side of the room, his view of me unobstructed. Every time I lifted my head, I would catch him staring shamelessly, expression stoic as his crossed arms flexed against his chest. I could feel his frustration from here, my blatant refusal to interact with him willingly finally starting to make him crack. 

Tearing my eyes away from my book, I make eye contact with the blonde once again. His stare was unwavering, and it was making it terribly hard to focus on anything else. All I could focus on was keeping my breath steady to mask how nervous his watchful gaze was making me.

“Can I help you?” I say, finally breaking the silence. I shut my book and set it on the nightstand before locking my fingers together, hands resting tensely in my lap. 

“Hm?” Rafe hums. His face doesn’t move, the sound leaving his throat lifelessly.

“Can I help you with something?” I repeated to him. “You’ve been sitting there staring at me like you have a problem.”

Rafe shrugs in response and tilts his head to the side. The wet, pink muscle of his tongue slips out of his mouth to moisten his lips as his eyes rake over my face once again.

“I can’t look at my girlfriend now?”

My head jerks back at the G word, the mention of our relationship leaving me puzzled. Rafe looks at me expectantly, not so patiently waiting for an answer to a question that was clearly rhetorical.

“Girlfriend?” I raise my eyebrows far into my hairline. “I wasn’t aware we were still together.”

“I wasn’t aware we ever broke up.”

Rafe steps into the room from the balcony and shuts the double doors behind him. It was a beautiful day, the mid-afternoon sun was sitting high in the sky and casting a warm light on the house. The white room practically glowed from all of the sun shining through the windows. 

He looked so intensely handsome.

“Well...you kidnapped me, for one.” I point out obviously, tongue poking through my cheek as I squint my eyes at him. He slowly approaches until he reaches the end of the mattress, legs pressing up against the foot of the bed. 

“I didn’t kidnap you.” The blonde rolls his eyes at the claim. He was either delusional or in denial of how I ended up here.

“Okay.” I say shortly, not willing to argue with him about it right now. “I definitely told you in very simple terms that I hate you. Multiple times, in fact, you stormed out of the room right after. I think that qualifies as a breakup.”

Rafe folds his lips into his mouth and tilts his head again. His eyes squint in a way that mirrors mine as he shakes his head no at me in disagreement. He releases his lips with a from the confines before he starts tsking at me as if I’ve said something incorrect.

“We aren’t done until I say we’re done, and I never said we were.” He sounds like a typical control freak, and it makes my head hurt. “And we both know you were lying, so don’t–don’t even do that right now, okay?”

“Do you know how mental you sound right now? Not that it’s out of the ordinary for you.”

Rafe scoffs at me and runs his hand over his semi-bald head. He really has no room to feel offended at all, it’s not like it was a lie. Sure, maybe it was a low blow, but it was deserved. The blonde hits himself on the side of his head with the heels of his hands like he’s trying to beat the thoughts out of it. It was something he did when he was too frustrated to form a proper sentence, when he couldn’t think.

“Please…Neriah.” Rafe says. Putting his hand to his mouth, he briefly chews on his thumb nail before dropping it back to his side. He takes a deep breath before continuing to speak. “Don’t, don’t make me mad right now. I–I don’t want to get mad at you, you know that. You know that right?”

“I don’t even know how you can be so delusional, Rafe. Really, I don’t.” I continued on. I knew that I was going to strike a nerve by implying that he’s crazy, it was something he hated to hear. “I think you were more sane when you were a drug addict-”

“Shut up. Shut the fuck up!” Rafe interrupts angrily. He takes a few long-legged strides to reach my side of the bed, the speed in which he appeared beside me inhuman. His hand flies out from the side of his body and snatches up my face, strong, tan fingers digging into the flesh of my cheeks.

It was an aching pain, the feeling of his thumb pressing deep into the bone of my mandible. His eyes held a burning, blue fire. A special anger that could only be triggered by questioning his sanity. 

He forces my head back to raise my eyes to head, the rough motion straining my neck uncomfortably. He lowers his face to meet mine and our breaths mingle together. My jaw clenches down on nothing, eyes burning just as hot as his.

Being this close to him was hard. I felt weak when his skin was on mine, when his lips were so close to mine. I hated being able to breathe in his scent so easily, I hated the way it made me feel. I hated the hammering of my heart; it only reminded me that I feel something for him that I know I shouldn’t.

“You don’t talk to me like that. Ever.” Rafe says lowly. He speaks through gritted teeth, voice rough and teetering on the edge of sounding dangerous. “I’ve been very nice to you, very…very respectful. But I’m not gonna let you walk all over me like I’m a little bitch. Is that what you think I am?”

I don’t verbalize an answer, letting the silence speak for me. I guess that wasn’t acceptable enough for him.

“Huh? You think I’m a little bitch, Neriah?” He repeats, the pads of his fingers gripping my face even tighter. I wince in pain for a second, but it looks more like a sneer than evidence of my discomfort.

I feel gross for the way it makes my body tingle when he looks at me like that, when he speaks to me like that. The longer I’m stuck here with him, the sicker I become. I don’t know why his manhandling suddenly makes me giddy, why I purposefully provoke him just to see what happens. It made my brain feel like it was going to combust.

I would never let him find that out, however. I don’t know what would happen if that became known. If it would ruin the fantasy of me being his perfect little doll and put me in more danger than I may be already.

“I don’t think you want me to answer that.” The sentence is slurred together as it leaves my mouth due to the lack of mobility in my jaw, the hinge of it held prisoner by Rafe’s hand. 

“You think you’re funny?” He says, eyebrows pulling together in faux curiosity. 

A smile plants itself on my lips, a dry laugh itching to climb up my throat and right throw itself into Rafe’s face. I’m not sure what will happen if I laugh directly in his face, and I don’t care to find out while he’s so unstable, so I settle for the small grin that has found home on my face.

The smile is short lived, the expression wiped clean off my face when he opens his mouth.

“Do you like acting like such a fucking cunt?” He says, hand pushing my face away roughly. The vulgar language leaving his mouth makes my jaw drop in shock. 

Instinctively my hand shot up from my lap, the sharp sound of skin on skin echoing off the walls. Rafe’s head snaps to the side at the violent contact, the force of the slap producing a pink mark on the side of his face. My own palm stung from the impact, the sensitive skin tingling with a continuous stinging pain.

Rafe doesn’t move for a few seconds, shock rendering him completely frozen. Slowly his head turns back to face me once again, the movement reminding me of an owl. Eerie and unnatural.

His jaw is clenched tightly, the muscles stretched over his mandible flexing tightly. His hand reaches up towards his own to wipe at the spot where I struck him. He pulls it away to examine his fingers, digits rubbing together as if there was residue left behind.

My heart pounds against my chest, instant regret filling my body. It was a rare occasion that I was genuinely afraid of Rafe, and this was one of those moments. Swallowing dryly, I watch Rafe closely as he looms over me silently. 

Nodding his head a few times, his gaze finally lands on me. 

“Because I’m a nice guy, I’m going to give you a chance to apologize.” Rafe says calmly. I rip my eyes away from the reddening print on his cheek to meet his eyes. He was very obviously furious, moments away from snapping if I said the wrong thing.

I care more for my pride than my safety in moments like this. 

“Are you gonna apologize for calling me a cunt?” Is what I choose to say instead. I can still feel the ghost of his fingers pressing into my face though they are long gone.

“No.” He doesn’t explain himself any further, leaving me with a single word answer.

I shrug my shoulders at the response and cross my arms against my chest. Rafe looks down at me expectantly as he awaits my apology.

“Then you deserved it.” I say boldly. Swinging my legs off of the bed, I push myself into a standing position directly in front of Rafe. Though my stomach was churning I wouldn't allow him to know that I was all but terrified of what his retaliation may be. “You deserve a lot more than that, actually. You wanted a Pogue girl, so you’re gonna get a Pogue girl.”

Pushing past him I enter the walk-in closet, the mirror at the very back of the small room showing Rafe’s still back facing me. I searched through my side for a change of clothes, the shower sounding like a perfect escape from the ominous blonde just a few feet away.

I brush past him once again to enter the bathroom, the feeling of his eyes hot against my back as I move silently throughout the room.

It’s when I enter the bathroom that I finally hear him move. His feet lead him into the bathroom with me, eyes weighing heavy on my back as I adjust the temperature of the shower. After a minute of pretending to wait for the shower to heat up to my liking, I turn to face Rafe with exasperation covering my features.

“Can I help you?” I make my annoyance clear, not letting my voice waver despite feeling quite apprehensive. “You see I’m trying to do something.”

He says nothing in response. Instead, he fully enters the bathroom, the door shutting behind him loudly as he shoves it closed. I flinched from the loud sound, the force of the door shutting gently shaking the room. 

He advances quickly, cornering me against the glass of the shower door and leaving me with no clear escape route. I swear in my head as my back presses up against the cold glass, Rafe showing no signs of stopping as he travels in long strides. Our toes touch as he presses himself up against me, the material of his boots firm against my bare feet.

“You’re so ungrateful.” Rafe says with a pout. I eye him warily as he brings his hand up towards my face. He runs the back of his fingers over my cheek softly, something he always does when he’s trying to intimidate me. “I do so much for you, I’d do anything for you, and this is how you think I deserve to be treated?”

“I’ve never asked you to do anything for me, Rafe. I never wanted any of this!”

“Stop!” He shouts directly in my face, anger finally boiling over. “I’m talking now! It’s not about what you want, it’s about what's good for you. If it wasn’t for me, you’d still be in the cut with–with a bunch of fucking drug dealers and low lives.”

“You mean your drug dealer?” I knock his hand away from my face, the feeling of his skin on mine making my heart race faster. “Y’know, Rafe, maybe I like the cut! At least I can do whatever the hell I want instead of sitting in here all day like I’m living in a dollhouse! What do I have to be grateful for?”

“I buy you nice things, I take you nice places, I treat you like a fucking princess, Neriah!” He exclaims. “You asked me to stop doing drugs, I did that. You wanted me to leave your brother alone, I did that! Anything you want, I do. But-but what do I get in return? You treat me like I’m some piece of shit! Like-like what I do means nothing to you. All I ask is that you listen to me, that you behave. That’s it, that’s all I want!”

“I’m not some docile, little fifties housewife that you can order around, Rafe! You can’t dose me up with barbiturates, and–and give me fancy things in exchange for my obedience. I’m a human being.” I push him away from me roughly, the lack of space between us and the steam building up in the closed-off bathroom beginning to clog my mind. 

I look down at the tiara-shaped ring adorning my hand, the stones glinting in the white light of the bathroom. I rip it off my hand and throw the jewelry at Rafe’s feet, the ring sliding across the tile floor and stopping abruptly by the toe of his boot. He looks like an angry cartoon bull, nostrils flaring wide at the sound of the metal clattering against the floor and invisible steam blowing out of his ears.

“And you know what…Here, Rafe! Take your fucking ring back!” I yelled. I’m sure Wheezie was eavesdropping, something she was notorious for, but I didn’t care. I was angry. “I don’t wanna be your ‘princess’ anymore. I never wanted any of this shit! Matter of fact, take this fucking necklace too.”

Before my hand gets too far up my neck to yank the chain off, Rafe rushes me. He presses me up against the now warm shower door again and smacks my hand away from my neck. His hand flies up to my neck faster than I can blink, the warmth of his fingers engulfing my whole throat rather firmly. 

The new necklace sits a thousand pounds heavier than the diamond one resting between my collarbones. 

I gasp quite loudly, the contact far too sudden for me to be prepared for it. I’m sure Rafe can feel me gulp against his palm, the blood pumping through my jugular pulsing against his fingers. 

“Don’t you ever take that off.” He whispers harshly. 

The churning of my stomach has turned into a tingly feeling, the butterflies that take residence fighting to fly out of my mouth to a world of peace away from Rafe.

“You ignore me for days, you can hit me, you–you can call me names, I don’t care.” His hand drops down to the piece of jewelry, the pendant of his initials embraced tightly by his fingers. “But this? You don’t touch it.”

I have no response, voice stuck in my throat when his gaze catches mine. His eyes are stormy, as they always are, the color of the ocean just outside this house. My chest rises and falls intensely against his hand, our closeness and the thickness of the foggy air rendering me speechless.

Swallowing thickly, I push him away from me again for a second time, eager to make some space. 

“Get out.” Is all I can find the strength to say.

He stands there for a long moment, just watching. His hand runs over his face roughly, the movement breaking the staring contest between us. Finally he turns around and heads for the door, the white wood slamming shut behind him.

I release a breath I didn’t know I was holding, hand shooting up to cover my mouth.

I felt sick.

I was allowing myself to feel anything but disgust when Rafe touched me, feeling everything but disgust, while my brother could be out there dead somewhere. I wanted to lobotomize myself.

My body takes me to the mirror on its own, and the girl I saw in the reflection looked every bit dazed and confused. Reaching up towards the diamond encrusted RC, I hesitantly graze it with cautious fingers. 

“You were mine a long time ago, I’m just glad you finally realized it.” 

I’m reminded of the moment in my room back home as I watch myself play with the necklace, the words meaning something more now than they did then.

[hermiones-amortentia]

I've seen your post about Ron's positive/underrated traits, one of them being kindness and how if he was a girl, he would be characterised as a caretaker. However, that trait is overlooked by most of the fandom. Do you think the fact that Ron is a boy has something to do with it (since kindness and being caring are generally considered "feminine" virtues and men with "feminine" traits are either overlooked or looked down upon)? If he was a girl, would his love and devotion be appreciated more?

Its a mix. Mostly they are being ignored bcz people don't remember them. Why? Bcz they watch movies/read out of character fanfics more than they read books.

Ron helps Harry to put his pajama on in COS.

Ron wants to make Hagrid tea when Hagrid is upset bcz that's what his mom does.

Ron forces Hermione to eat a decent meal when she is ignoring her dinner for study.

Ron cuts bacons and puts them on Harry's plate when he is hurting from Umbridge's scar.

Now. People don't remember them. Partly bcz they don't read books. Partly bcz they DON'T want to like him. They focus on what they want to see and exaggerate those ten times. They only remember how much abusive he is to Hermione and how he 'betrayed' Harry.

It's same with Ron and Hermione. Its always 'oH hOw mUcH tHeY fIgHt' but never how many times Ron jumps into her defence, how much times she spends time with Ron without Harry, how Hermione apologises to him, him apologises to her, how Hermione stands up against twins for him, how she kisses on his cheek to distract him from the song Malfoy wrote, how she is absolutely devastated when he isn't with her in DH. (They do focus on that scene though. Very much. Just in a different way. They use it to say he 'abandoned' them) how much happy she is when He isn't with lavender anymore, how many times he consoles her effortlessly, how many times he calls her amazing and brillaint. Etc etc

People don't want to love Ron. Bcz

1. He is red head, poor, comes from a working class family, wears hand me down stuff. West romanticizes/sympathizes with the rich. Not with the poor. There's HEAVY classism in the Harry Potter fandom.

2. Most Men see themselves as Harry. Most Women see themselves as Hermione. And they don't exactly want friends of Harry. They want followers. Who would bindly worship and follow him. They want someone who would worship the ground Hermione walks on. Needless to say Ron doesn't do either of those two things. Lmao

3. Women want to bang whatever character they personally fancy and use Hermione as a SI blank slate. So they cant digest Ron as he 'comes in the way' of their fap material fanfics.

4. Ron doesn't have anyone defending him. Whenever Hermione messes up, Hagrid, Luna, the narrative are there to defend her. Heck even Harry defends her once in HBP. When Harry messes up he has the abused orphan card. Plus narrative support and Hermione. Whenever Ron messes up who is there to defend him? If anything narrative doubles down to bash him.

5. Ron's flaws hit home much harder than Harry or Hermione's. Each and everyone atleast once feels jealousy, envy, insecurities in their life. But if you are white, will you understand Malfoy's racism? Or if you aren't an orphan can you understand Harry being self centred? These are superficial flaws. Ron's are REAL flaws. Peoole don't want to be reminded of their flaws.

Ron gets very much injustice from this fandom. People don't value him. Forget about treating him as 1/3rd of the main characters, they don't even give him the minimum respect. Ron's EVERY positive thing is underrated. Each and every. Not only kindness. His flaws are exaggerated, he is bashed, ridiculed, maligned, annihilated. Fandom Ron is an OC. just like fandom Malfoy is an OC.

If he was a girl he would have got Ginny treatment. Ginny gets maligned for coming in the way of Harry ships. Ron would have been treated the same way.