#cant get more embarassing than that

[leoleolovesdc]

When you finally get to the part of the fic where at least one side of ur otp is pining but theyre incredibly cringe about it and you just cant bring urself to read it so you have to take hour long breaks between paragraphs

[puppyeared]

man ok so you know the spiciness scale on menus that show you how spicy a dish is so you can order based on your tolerance. can we have that for sauces too please

[francy-sketches]

people will say literally anything to hate on hotd for no reason I just saw someone say the dragons in got were better. bitch they look like burnt vegetables

[ebbpettier]

my love for simon snow and baz pitch is the "would it be too much to commission someone for body-pillow designs of them and get them physically printed on cases" kind

[abimee]

like i personally dont care if a video game has hardcore sex as a mechanic or not because admittedly ive gone past finding fictional characters sexually exciting so if i want my little oc to have sex i can just draw it myself. i dont need to see their polygon tatas bouncing around free nipple in the woods talking about taking a guy to pound town USA i just wanna be able to go on some of the cool enviromental buildings that are off in the distance. like this cliffside in thavnair

[nomairuins]

i just fucking hate having ptsd all of it. so many stupid fucking things send me into fucking hysterics it sucks and i hate it and i dont want itttt anymore i dont want it.

[gommyworm]

:^/

[miikaarinn]

woke up on friday to a msg from my ex partner/fp and i have been struggling with what to do ever since. also who the fuck sends somwone a tiktok at 1am when as fair as he's concerned you hate him and then expect him to gladly have a conversation with you at 11 (he has his own life surprisingly)

[gibbearish]

hey question when did spencer's get dope as fuck

[milo-is-rambling]

I LOVE YOU PAST MILO -current Milo nauseas head in a sparkling clean toilet I cleaned literally a half hour ago and then got too high while celebrating how clean it looked and feel sick now😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[bittwitchy]

sometimes i forget that i have to physically look at my tag

[nomairuins]

i mean like idt ill bump into anyone but whatever

[simplyvyn]

NO ONE LIKE YOU.

You and Kaiser had a pretty rough breakup. Well, for him. You knew he'd be back on the hook. There's plenty of fish in the sea, he says. Guess you're a dolphin.

M. Kaiser x reader - 1.1k wc

Warnings: exes to lovers, very ooc Kaiser but in a good way i promise, german! reader

꒷꒦⋆⑅˚₊┈ • ┈ ・ʚɞ ・ ┈ • ┈₊˚⑅⋆꒷꒦⋆⑅˚₊┈ • ┈ ・ʚɞ꒷꒦

"Stop being so damn petty. You're not THAT special anyways!" Kaiser yelled.

"Is asking for a little bit of proof that you DO love me, that hard? I barely even see you because you've been so focused up with Isagi, praying for his downfall and shit." You replied back. You kept your tone low, not wanting any of the people at your hotel hear you both.

"You don't have to see me all day! Y/N, we've been together for at least a year and a half! You can't handle living without me?"

"I can! But you just don't show that we have been together these days!"

"Alright, i'll make things easier for you. Lets not be together then. Leave. I can find someone who's not petty and clingy as you." He said.

You scoff. "Me? Clingy? Okay, I'll admit i do have clingy feelings but you cannot find anyone like me. Someone who can last long with your attitude. I'd like to see you try." You are as competitive as your boyf- ex. Boyfriend. But you wanted to see. A little challenge wont mind right?

"Pfft. Theres plenty of fish in the sea. Watch and learn." He said.

That's how your little relationship ended. It's been at least 8 months, 2 weeks and 6 days approximately since your break up with him. Your in your couch, sitting idly scrolling through the channels of your TV. your phone was beside you, it was 11:41 PM when a notification popped up on your phone. From an unknown number.

??: You win.

You: hm?

??: No damn fish can compare to you, liebes.

You grin with victory. You already knew who it was as you sigh and put your phone down on the couch, letting him do the action. It was just minutes later until you heard banging on the door. You jump from it and walk to the door, you were hesitating wether you should open it. You already knew it was him, why were you hesitating? Heat flew through your cheeks and the air seems hotter than usual, your thoughts were immediately shut off when someone spoke from the other side of the door.

"I know your on the other side of the door Schatz, open up." He spoke which made you immediately open the door.

"Yet you still have an ego to talk to me like that. Better yet, to even talk to me. Why are you here, König?" You held on your door knob while tilting your head.

"I want to talk to you." You already knew. You sighed, your chest arising then dropping as you did. "Get inside."

You went to your kitchen to grab water and you didn't notice Kaiser following you. Like a helpless dog.

"Why are you following me?" You ask as you turn around. "I said i wanted to talk to you. Of course i need to see you."

You drank on the cup of your water and turned to him once again and you leaned on your kitchen counter.

"Okay... speak."

He was in a white button-up shirt with black pants and a watch on his wrist. He seemed quite shy. Embarassed? Something like that. He put his hand behind his neck and averted your gaze. "Look, i don't wanna admit this but I'll go straight to the point.. you we're right."

Your head tilting in confusion. Well, not really, you were just pretending. "On what?"

He sighed before look at you. "That.. i cant find anyone... like you..." You definitely heard that. But you just need him to say it a bit louder.

"Hmm?"

"I said.. I can't find anyone like you...."

"Speak up Liebling.. What did you say?" You slightly leaned closer to him tilting your head and putting a hand to your ear, pretending that you need to hear him more clear. Of course, he noticed that.

The next thing you will know, he pulled you by the wrist, pushing you to the counter behind you to pin you. Leaning closer to your ear, you can feel his hot breath in your ear as he whispered;

"I won't repeat this again. For the past ten months that i have dated other people other than you, has been pain. No one can keep up with my egoistic personality as much as you can, hübsch.." You can feel him smirk on your ear. even though you can't see it, it sent heat waves through your face. Simple words from him made you so flustered.

With his hand holding your wrist, the other hand of his went up to your face, holding your chin and looked down on you.

"Well, of course no one was more prettier than you that's why I came here to see you, Mein liebe."

"Hah! Yeah, for calling me clingy, it won't be easy getting me back Kaiser. And I especially won't make it easier for you." You said.

But it only really takes you to seal away to him was just a simple kiss. He put a peck in your lips, then your temples and your neck. He picked you up and sat you on the kitchen counter and continued kissing your lips, it was more intimate now, he was closer, chest to chest. Why would he be worried about anything? Your kissing him back, it was already obvious to him that you want him back. Hish hands we're on your hand holding it, the other was on your hip to keep you in place.

It seems liked he doesn't want you to let go, well you don't plan to either way, its been so long since you felt like this in 10 months. You've been definitely missing out these past months with doing nothing about your love life. And thanks to Kaiser, it doesn't seem like it anymore.

The first one to pull away was you. Panting out of breath, as you look down but he was only looking at you so addictingly. Did he really miss you even the times he dated other people? He didn't know he misses you that much. He kissed you on your cheek, forehead and a little peck on the lips, his grip on your waist tightened as you held on his shoulder.

"Kommst du zu mir zurück, Liebling?" He asked.

"I told you, It'll probably take the same time as how you wanted to find someone that can keep up with you."

He frowned a bit looking down, but you cup his face.

"Wenn Sie mich morgen zum Mittagessen einladen, ist die Zeit vielleicht kürzer"

And he nodded eagerly, "Anything for my queen."

Translations: Liebes (dear) / Schatz (sweetheart) / Konig (king) / Liebling (darling) / hübsch (pretty) / Mein Liebe (My love) / Kommst du zu mir zurück, Liebling? (Will you come back to me, darling?) / Wenn Sie mich morgen zum Mittagessen einladen, ist die Zeit vielleicht kürzer (If you invite me to lunch tomorrow, maybe the time will be shorter)

A/N: its finally finished.. some translations might be wrong guys mbmb, lmk if there is rqs r open btw mwamwa! kinda wanna write for kageyama nut idk what prompt lol. lmk if u guys have any idea ><

[crowlyne]

Cant stop thinking about emperor sy au...

Thanks to sy's modern knowledge of historical palace dramas and encyclopedic knowledge of pidw along with him having max stats on luck and charisma he survived the succession war (and somehow becomes an emperor? He is still confused on how he got it. Its not that he cut down his fellow princes nor did he scheme to get the emperor position but hes the only legitimate option left). SY doesnt have any experience on ruling kingdoms however (or anything really) but thankfully SY got an economics degree in his past life so hes not a fish out of the water.

Although the imperial rule doesn't affect the cultivation world directly, they're still impacted in the form of trade and manpower. The power to empower and cripple sects is in his hands. Ever since SY declaring SJ as his long lost brother CQM received a lot of lucrative trade. SQH is appreciative but hello?? He didnt write any long lost family members on SJ! So he got curious and begged the sect leader to send him instead of SJ to meet the emperor for trade discussion, and thats how he met his fellow transmigrator.

SY made him cough up all of his authorial knowledge and found out about OPM and HHP, although its already too late to save SXY as LBH has been born. Needless to say, HHP's coffers are running thin these days. With them having less money their manpower and support from noble families are slowly diminishing, the maintenance and security of the seals fell to disrepair, and SY (in disguise) with SQH's cultivation expertise managed to free TLJ. A few brief expositions later, TLJ and ZZL thanked both of them and slipped back go the demon realm. News of their freedom got out and HHP is scrutinized and support dropped even further than before.

SY did manage to visit QJP regularly to visit his brother and consequently, meeting LBH a number of times (making LBH absolutely smitten with him and considering joining the nonexistent imperial harem). With SJ more assured in his position (also maybe SY's promise of him always having a place in the palace and his family and less people being hostile towards him had an impact) SJ had less frustrations and projections to subject LBH and his students to. He still doesnt like the beast but his stupid brother (an emperor!) doted on him like a favored child so he tried his best to ignore him instead.

Things were going well until the immortal conference where instead of SQH orchestrating the attack, its TLJ and ZZL trying to get a hit on HHP's OPM and dragging LBH back to demon realm kicking and screaming. LBH is presumed dead.

SY found out of course but he didnt know the details (SJ remains tight lipped and insists that hes dead and thats all he should know) and thought LBH fell into the abyss and SJ pushed him like the original plot and grew depressed of thinking of his brother that he grew fond of turn into human stick. Also considering LBH's going to merge the realms and conquer the human kingdoms under one rule he might not have long either, he is, after all, a human male which by the novel's rules itself, a cannon fodder.

Years passed and the demon army, under the demon emperor LBH, conquered other human kingdoms and eventually showed up on SY's kingdom's doorstep but not for the reason SY's thinking of.

SY found himself still alive (!!!) and married (???) with LBH for alliance. CQM stays unmolested and unburned for years to come. SJ, however, remains a sour pickle with this whole arrangement, but at least hes left in peace.

Bonus :

LBH loves to roleplay as a concubine whenever he dropped by SY's palace. When SY visited the demon realm however, LBH loves to show him off that the demons thought of him as a concubine instead (much to SY's embarassment)

[dolliestfairy]

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ TW: Noncon, Housewife kink, Masturbation, threesome, nonconsexual kissing, breeding kink, jealousy, Double penetration(?), and a little pervert-y. lmk if i miss anything. chubby reader fics with no skintone of reader mentioned.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Word count : 2,2K

imagine having a duo who have a housewife kink.. like everytime they see you doing literally anything -- theres always this dirty unholy thoughts of them about you in the back of their mind, and the fact that they actually know it each other but never actually opened up to you. they always masturbate with themself, while thinking about your plump bellies swelling with their kids, having their babies, making them foods before and after they work, giving them kisses on their cheeks when they just got home, and then get pregnant again at the end of the night. one of the duos cant even see you straight in the face just because this thoughts really really devouring them. the one other can cover it better than their other ones but still.. they're still flustered as well.

this all will be out of the window when one of them start kissing you in the lips without your concern at all. the other one who witness all of it becomes heavy-jelly until they start to meet their lips on yours while the other ones just seeing both of you exchange each others saliva. and only a minute after that, the one that seeing both of you exchange each other saliva start to open your skirt up and take down your lower clothes, making you panic. you try to push the ones that has been swallowing your lips this whole moments but you forget both of them were strong. more strong enough to hold you down within it. when you finally get strip to naked, and they start to put their fingers into you, at this rate your emotions are mixed up. theres horny, angry, dissapointed, embarassed, and just.. want it to be over. you close your eyes to protect yourself from seeing those hornyble experiences, until one of them start slapping your cheeks, making you scream but the other ones who is pounding into you quickly shoved their hands into your mouth to shut down your screams. one of them starts begging the other ones to speed it up because they want to feel the feelings of fucking you too! but the one that was fucking you right there and then cant just get enough of you! i mean how could they? you're just so.. delicious, so delicate and.. plump, begged for their creams. its just a matter of time before the other ones start to be really really impatient until they cant take it anymore as they strip their own self naked and start to pound you in a different hole. at this rate.. you dont know what to do. all you can do is just.. stay there and wait until its over.. you dont even know which holes both of them pounding at. what matters is now that, you're doomed. and you're really really doomed to be their housewife. they dont really gave a shit about the fact if they can really impregnate you or not, but they do gave a shit about the fact that giving you a kid -- adopted or not, will tied you to both of them, together and forever.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ The Duos that i'm talking about are ;

SATORU & SUGURU [Jjk] MIYA ATSUMU & MIYA OSAMU [Hq] Rindou Haitani & Ran Haitani [tokyo revengers] Itoshi Sae & Itoshi Rin [blue lock] BOKUTO & AKAASHI [Hq] Tendou & Ushijima [Hq] Akiteru Tsukishima & Kei Tsukishima [Hq] HAWKS & DABI [Mha] SUKUNA & YUUJI [Jjk] Jiraiya & Orochimaru [naruto] KAEYA & DILUC [genshin impact] Stu Macher & Billy Loomis [Scream].

did i forget anyone!? insert ur fav!

[electraslight]

fave bevin headcanons ??? ik u probably have answered this and dgaf but I love them and love hearing ur ideas and opinions they're always so great ☹️❤️‍🔥( im a lurker so I apologize for the lack of interaction !!!!! )

hiii taking a break in my no tumblr run to prosteleytize abt bevin, here are some loose headcannons

-kevin had a running joke going for a bit where he would not let ben out of the car until he gave him a kiss on the cheek aka Kiss Tax especially when people who weren't ben gwen and kevin were also in the car. he thinks the way ben gets mad about it is very funny, but it kind of backfires on him because ben stops getting mad and just does it and now every time he drives ben somewhere he gets a kiss. hes considering making the ride tax something more embarassing, like kissing with tongue.

-kevin sleeps with such a wide berth that he will somehow be on top of someone during any nap, even if the person is sitting feet away. the only one who's ok with being snored and drooled on is ben, because he is constantly cold and appreciates a bro snuggle

-ben and kevin do that scoobly do shit when theyre scared (a la jumping into each others arms n high pitched screaming)

-u may at this point be like 'hey these aren't bevin headcannons this is just them doing mildly gay best friend stuff' and to this i raise u this: i feel like, if ben and kevin were to ever aknowlege their feelings for each other, they wouldn't be the type of ppl to 'date'. theyre kind of beyond dating at this point, arent they? their relationship isnt really defined by human terms, as theyre both distanced from a lot of human social norms (kind of teetering on the brink of human and alien) and also theyve been through so much shit it would be weird to suddenly go through the human rituals of 'hold hands and go to resturants and introduce him to the parents blah blah blah'. they're more than that, and the way they go about being in love is kind of the same way they're friends, still joined at the hip and ragging on each other, still getting into fights and willing to kill and die for each other. its like being best friends and being 30 year married people at once. theyre sure theres some alien word for it, but they dont really care. ben is kevins and kevin is bens, and thats how they roll. and they make out with tongue. duh.

(clarifying for ppl w no reading comprehension: they are in gay homo love but they dont put labels like 'boyfriend' or 'dating' on it bc once youve held another boys hand and made the choice to destroy your body to save him twice + your lover learned what it meant to be a hero from u and you are a symbol of hope for him and he is for u you cant really just be like 'heres my bae' now can you. relationship anarchy win.)