#i dedicated so much time to writing bc it brings me joy but like i havent gotten anywhere w it
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sometimes i forget that i have to physically look at my tag
#ive been on this website since 2011 dont look at me#the funniest thing is if you go on my archive#ingoring posts ive straight up privated or deleted bc i was younger and they embarassed me#i dont think ive ever actually not been on this website for more than a few weeks#like i had long LONG breaks from my lersonal where every six months id fill the q#post an odd gifset and abscond away somewhere#but if im not here im on an rp#and if im not on an rp im logged in here#and thats just been my cycle since 2013 or so#bc the first two years i would be on all ac#cts simutaneously and uhhhh thats how i deleted my original personal sO#if i didnt delete a lot pf#those rps to delete the memories which didnt eve. work#imagine how many years of complete tabble iād have rn#i actually saw a word count page i had made in like 2016 on here snd#i at one point wrote upwards of 50000 words a month just in rp replies#and now even just getting a thread started is so hard bc i plot w ppl post a thing and nothing happens lmao#and i dont blame anyone for that we all adults now n it hard but its also kind of sad yknow#i dedicated so much time to writing bc it brings me joy but like i havent gotten anywhere w it#and unfortunately i live in america so if i cant make my hobbies earn me money then#/shrug shrug#i also feel horrible anytime i ask for money tgo for anything so like lol#growing up a people pleaser what uppppp#jts almost 430 am no i have. not slept
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Hi! I was wondering about your Lost Guardian au from ages ago, do you think youāll ever plan on updating it and if not, could someone else take up the fic?
So heres the thing. If someone wants to write a fic *inspired* by The Lost Guardian, iām not gonna stop them, and iād probably feel super honored so long as the inspiration was correctly credited!
As for ātaking up the fic,ā the short answer is no.
I have active drafts and the rest of the story already planned out to its finish, notes, even a branch-off fic set post-story that will likely go up on my nsfw blog if i ever get around to editing it. The Lost Guardian hasnāt been abandoned, itās simply on hiatus. (And yes, i recognize 3 almost 4 years so far is a really fucking long hiatus. The Chapter 9 draft doc was made in december of 2020, and last edited in July 2022)
I started writing that fic whilst still in highschool, a time where I was 17 and didnt have to worry yet about getting my license or maintaining a part time job, i had an over abundance of freetime even partially to my detriment, the fandom was booming and I had plenty of feedback, and this fic was (and still *is*) a story im proud of.
But iām 22 now, working a full time job to pay rent and account for a number of minor ādisabilitiesā(best word i have for them atm) that I cant ignore or push to the side nor treat poorly, from the lasting effects on my body of stunted growth to celiac/glutent intolerance to adhere to that directly determines how easily my body functions for the week, to dealing with glasses i cannot afford to break and taking care of teeth i cannot afford to fix, taking care of my mental health and using the free time i have to do what brings me the most joy at that time.
The sanders sides fandom has heavily quieted down with the season finale hiatus and Iād like to think I did pretty well for going six long years dedicated solely to that without cracking under the silence, because *I knew* when I caved to something else itād be a long while before I had the drive to come back with any sort of resolution to my active works. Thats just how my hyper fixations work. I cannot focus on multiple at once, itās too much to process simultaneously and takes away my enjoyment bc I tend to watch/consume things repeatedly to catch every little detail i missed. And it doesnāt help when one loses steam because their content barely breaks 100 notes(80% of which are likes, 15% are reblogs with the occasional comment, and 5% are self-reblogs) when back in the height of it all, a few thousand notes was pretty average interaction. This blog still has about 11.5k followers, almost all of which came from the height of the fandom period. So for now iāve moved onto the FNAF DCA fandom, bc it is fresh and new to me.
I know you didnāt mean to poke the bear here, I get it, but like.. Cāmon. Any other fic of mine likely wouldnāt have gotten the same reaction in full but, still. Iāve had to answer this question a handful of times over the years at the point, which might be why this response feels so charged, and iām sorry.
I donāt mean to come off as snippy or rude, but it *is* kind of invasive to offer to finish oneās creative work when itās taking too long and theres very little payback for it. Iāve got adhd, delayed satisfaction isnāt a thing I experience. Just guilt that it wasnāt finished in a way for me to post it in time before I broke and lost all motivation to share it.
In my head, TLG has been long finished and held the ending for years, theres just been no energy to put in the effort of finish writing it for others to read. Iām still trying to get my life together to change that, donāt get me wrong, but the American economy is literally in shambles so who knows how or even if iāll manage that. Call me selfish for being content with only mentally having my creative storyās ending and a collection of rambles and notes to show for it, but at the end of the day, itās still my story, and i dont feel comfortable with people trying to ātake up the mantleā to finish it, when they donāt know how it ends.
Iām glad you like it enough to want to, though, I really *really* am. Iām just sorry I havenāt been able to finish it for you all. And i just donāt know when that will be, I just know that I *want* to do so, however long it takes.
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āāāā» Ā·āĀ· ā»āāā @riiese
š ā i love how you portray your muse(s) š ā i love your aesthetic / graphics āØ ā i love the way you write š« ā i enjoy writing with you š ā i enjoy talking to you š ā you seem like a genuinely nice person āļø ā your posts always bring me joy ā¤ļø ā you're one of my favorite blogs
š Ā * Ā ā Ā šŗš“šØš³š³ šŗšš“š©š¶š³šŗ š¶š š²š°šµš«šµš¬šŗšŗ.
;-- marker ! we've only interacted a few times, but in those few times, ive grown to appreciate your dedication to your ocs and writing in general. i can tell how strong your passion is, and it's kinda intoxicating ngl. i see you around my dash and ( yeah im nosey ) and read your posts here and there, and i wish i could put enough thought into my characters as much as you do bc holy heck ! sometimes i find myself re-reading your ocs bios bc they're just so good and i do get inspiration to better my own thinking process, especially when it comes to pandora, so i appreciate you a lot. and let's not forget the art you have of your ocs too ! ugh, i love them so much ( a lil jelly bc i got none for pandora yet kek ). here's hoping for more interactions in the future and to grow together in this silly rp world <3
#riiese#;ooc#;asks#š¢ ć»{ asks } Ź°įµįµŹ³ āæįµ įµįµā±Ė”.#:3c#i look up to you tbh#thank you for giving me a chance to interact with you !
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Hi there! I didn't know you had a tumblr. I've been reading most of your lu fics for the last couple of months. Love how you write Twilight and Warriors. They're such brothers the way you write them. I genuinely don't know how you write so much in such a short amount of time, but I've been enjoying it!
Thank you for reading!! it brings me so much joy to share my work <3 i love writing them so so much XD i really thought when i first started writing lu fic that i would focus on twi & wild or twi & time a lot more but twi & warriors have stolen my heart
the tumblr is new as i am a Dedicated Lurker so bare with me as i figure out this god forsaken website beyond likes/reblogs.
i have a bad habit of hobby fixating XD so this has been nearly all my free time outside of Responsibilities bc im having so much fun with it! seeing lovely people like you in the fandom and having people interact with my work is just *chefs kiss*. i am a glutton for praise <3
ive been writing creatively since i was 8 or so and over time have gotten into the habit of editing myself in real time. i call it the Fucking Send It philosophy (usually) bc I know if it hesitate that i'll never be content with my work
i also save time by refusing to plot/outline anything :D i do not recommend this as i am usually along for the ride as much as the reader or working off a vague mental sketch
ty so much for the ask bestie!! made my day <3
#fanfic#someranswers#somerwrites#warm fuzzies#srs yall are gonna make me cry being so sweet#less serious answer involves being depressed which im told i should not officially recommend#so drugs instead#and by drugs i mean ssris#take care of yourself yall#no alcoholic depressed writers#just writers in therapy remembering to drink water and sleep
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Letās spread the self-love š
Aww thanks for sending the ask! š I do not write fic (I believe Iāve written a total of oneš
), but I do make video edits. So if you donāt mind, here are some that Iām proud of:
Vanessa x Dennis - The Goes Wrong Show (This Will Be An Everlasting Love)
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This was intended to be a crack-ish/joke video since Vanessa and Dennis accidentally got engaged to each other in s2 of The Goes Wrong Show. But then I started to actually ship them as I worked on this video. And this was the first video where I went wait - this is actually good? Usually I nitpick my edits even after I publish them, but I like everything about this one. The clips chosen, the timing, the song - good job past me haha. Honestly, I am still waiting to make a video that gives me the same satisfication I had while making this one. Definitely a favorite that I always enjoy rewatching :)
The Ladies of Mischief Theatre - Wannabe (Spice Girls)
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A video celebrating the Mischief ladies of 2022! Proud of myself for managing to include all the women involved in Mischief shows that year - I was trying to figure out how to work in the stage shows. Very happy with how it turned out. My favorite moments are definitely the beginning where there is a little intro to each of the mmni ladies and the later section with the mmni Emmys :)
Olympia and Otis - Odd Squad MV (Friendship Song)
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Olympia and Otis are my favorite Odd Squad partners so I've been wanting to make a music video for them, and over 6 years later I finally managed to do so! When I came across this song, I knew it was the perfect song for these perfect partners haha. Quite happy with the timing (I tried to to make the high fives line up with the beat) and the parallels I added in. This was also one of the first times I tried adding voiceovers over different clips, and I think it worked out well. I enjoy rewatching this video bc seeing these two together brings me so much joy :)
Shut Up and Dance | Odd Squad Edition - Happy Birthday to Odd Squad! Odd Squad Dancing Montage
youtube
A dancing montage made to celebrate the 8th anniversary of Odd Squad last year!! This was definitely one of my more ambitious projects bc I literally went through each episode of s1 and 2 to grab every moment of dancing (I didnāt have access to s3 so I had to work with whatever clips I could find on youtube). So that was a lot of episodes and a lot of dancing haha. And then figuring out where each clip should go - I tried lining up the similar style dancing next to each other. Also I think this video had the most clips Iāve ever worked with. But I am very happy with how it turned. This video always brings a smile to my face - the dancing + the music are so fun!! :)
Lucy & George (Someone To You) - Lockwood and Co Netflix
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A video I made earlier this year dedicated to Lucyās and Georgeās friendship. I have loved the books for years, but the show came out earlier this year, and Lucyās and Georgeās friendship was one of my favorite parts of it. (Plus there was a lot of locklyle videos but a severe lack of videos dedicated to these two haha). This video uses the most voice overs to date, and this was the first time I experimented with cutting out the background noise/music in the clips to isolate the dialogue so that was a fun challenge to figure out. It is very stylistically different from the edits I usually make, but Iām extremely proud of it, and I think it showcases the evolution of their relationship very well. Literally the only thing that slightly bothers me is the coloring/lighting but that was a result of me trying to color the video bc omigod the dark scenes are dark. But like I said, Iām very proud of this. I like to think it showcases how far Iāve come as a video editor :)
#thanks for the ask!#I rewatched these videos and Iām honestly so proud of how far Iāve come???#yes I know these are not the best in the world#but I made these videos for my own enjoyment#and I still love watching them#self recs#my top 5 videos#edits in the palace#videos in the palace#rambles in the palace#the goes wrong show#mischief movie night in#mischief theatre#mischief comedy#vanessa x dennis#vanessa wilcock wynn carroway#dennis tyde#olympia and otis#odd squad#anna cathcart#odd squad pbs kids#lockwood and co#lockwood and co netflix#lucy and george#lucy carlyle#george karim#answering asks in the palace#firesoulstuff
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got a challenge for you, your moots as songs go!!
hmmm....
i have quite a few that i consider moots but for the sake of time since i have to go help my mom out, i'll do the people that i am closest to....
@talesofyuan - I know she is fond of Japanese songs and I too listen to them quite frequently, mainly because of anime lol. But Inuyasha has always been (still is) my number one favorite anime of all time, and this song holds a special place in my heart because i would listen to it all the time after watching the show. literally. it's very calming and the lyrics are very becoming of strength, moving forward, and building courage. love it. i think it does well to represent Yuanwon-ie.
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@iamliacamila - its a shame that this cover isn't on spotify, but for many reasons, i am dedicating THIS version of THIS song to the one and only Camila because i just know her love for Heeseung is strong....it is very strong. so when i hear this song (regardless which version) i think of her.
@nikstrange - My longtime heethan girl. Of course, when this track came out, I thought of heeseung with this one, and Ethan with chaconne. Doesn't matter which one i listen to, i'm going to think about her because i know just how much she loves heethan. the way she gets sooooo hyped up brings me up to the level of motivation i need, on days where i am so darn tired because i've been helping out the parents, or the weather is bad, and i just feel lazy, nikstrange has been my motivation to continue forth and produce content for yall. so thank her for like the timeliness of the postings. :)
@silcry - I like this song for silcry because, the lyrics and the beat is groovy (now mind you, based off the vlives, i am familiar with heeseung's choice of music, and i've listened to this song way before i discovered enhypen, but i think he would like this song) but also...i listen to this song quite a bit when i think about heethan for each chapter. and i know how much my silcry loves heethan with these wonderful asks i'm getting. keep it up! <3
@vampiregirl215 - so when i originally was drafting the teaser for SE7EN, i was listening to this song as i have alot of type O negative in my playlist and when i was drafting up Heelel's character, this song was literally just playing in the background and not so much the lyrics, but the beat of it just helped make me develop that deep and dark vibe of heelel...which i know my vamp-girl looooooves heelel. So everytime i listen to type O, especially this song, i think of heelel. I am dedicating this song to her because i love how she expresses her love for heelel. lol.
@jaehaki - my longtime supporter and reblogger, i have to use this song to reflect just how much this reader has lifted me by supporting me. literally an angel on earth! Muah! this song is for my jaehaki because, truly....they're an angel...and i love the way they always express their love or my works! so cute and funny!
@en-thralled or @angelsunoo - this beautiful person (pardon the tacky pun) but truly is a beautiful person inside and out because the moment they discovered my work, they have been such a joy and delight to interact with. i love the way they express their love for each chapter of SE7EN series, the message they sent where they were sooooooo delighted by one of the chapters they said "you little bitch!" and i loooooooved every single bit of it, it brought such a big smile on my face bc i knew they loved the chapter so much that they couldnt contain themselves. so beautiful!
@raishaii - My partner in crime! no matter what i write and what i warn people of, this person is truly a rose because they appreciate my work so much that they'll grin and bear through anything just to read my chapters and it tickles me and brings me joy. literally, when i think of roses, i think of Rai. Secret note, they dont know this but those banners i used in the recent SE7EN chapters, the ones with the red roses, I picked roses because i was thinking of raishaii since i was interacting with them through comments at the time about the latest chapters. <3
@stvrryhee - so i love this song ....sooooooo much and, i compare this song to my precious Stvrryhee because, whenever i read their comments on the latest chapters, it literally gives me the same rush of excitement and motivation that of a sugar rush, which brings me to this song. I love interacting with my readers and Stvrryhee is no exception, it's literally like a daily routine and i love it. i can't go on a day without my daily interactions with them. <3
@jinniespuppy - I love this song...ofc i love dua lipa and i also love elton john...so the two of them together is literally a masterpiece...just like this reader. she reaches out to me and expresses her love for my chapters in a very affectionate manner that just melts my heart. the love i have in reading her messages reminds me of the love i have for this song bc i truly do love it so much. <3
@lisaaannna - my little FrƤuĀ·lein! so one of my all time favorites from En- is this song...i just love this song, the up and catchy beat and not to mention, i do enjoy the choreography for it as well. I love this song so much just like i do with my lisanna. so smart and always so inquisitive, coming up with thoughts on heethan that inspires me to put some of the more sentimental moments in each chapter. so if you're looking to thank someone for the fluff and the very endearing moments of heethanxreaden, look no further, this girl had inspired the events for chapter 16 and 17 of HHP.
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20 Questions for Fic Writers
Thank you so much for the tag @justhallucinating!
1. How many works do you have on ao3?
currently i have 2 works! 1 completed and 1 wip
2. What's your total ao3 word count?
50,450 words (and counting!)
3. What fandoms do you write for?
as of right now i only plan to write for peaky fandom (shipping tommy with, like, every man in the show ever), but who knows!
4. Top five fics by kudos
i only have 2, so... it's daylight that gets the most kudos
5. Do you respond to comments?
oh if you comment on my fic not only will i respond but i also will be planning our spring AND fall wedding, as well as preparing our brand new house and farm by the countryside
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
no fic of mine will have angst ending bcs i take things too seriously sometimes so angst ending will absolutely traumatize me <3 no angst ending in this household !! (and also bcs like i write fics abt my comfort characters so i want them to always be happy and jolly)
7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
all of them!! guaranteed!!
8. Do you get hate on fics?
thank god i haven't got one! and pls refrain from leaving hate comments on any fics possible... it's okay to leave constructive criticism, but plain and borderline hate???? baby let's take some fresh air for a little bit shall we
9. Do you write smut?
i try to... :'D
10. Craziest crossover?
not like a whole crossover but i definitely plan on getting other characters from outside the peaky fandom (who were working in the same movie as tom hardy and/or cillian murphy) into my tofie fics... for example MAYBE i'd get someone blonde, British, great with cameras, loves physics, and whose name probably rhymes with gistopher molan to be one of tommy's exes... or i'd get someone brunette, slender, very into the concept of lucid dreaming, whose name rhymes with barthur to be alfie's love interest before tommy... who knows right... š¶
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
i haven't and let's keep it that way!!
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
nope, i don't even think my fics r worthy of such dedication :'')
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
no, but i'm open to do it!!
14. All time favorite ship?
tofie, definitely. but i also LOVE cherik (charles and erik from x-men). and i love every ship that has cillian murphy's character in it š¤·š»āāļø
15. What's a wip you want to finish but you doubt you ever will?
i'm the type of writer that HAS TO finish all WIPs before even picking up other ideas, so hopefully none! hopefully I'll get everything completed!
16. What are your writing strengths?
frankly speaking, i don't think i have any.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
i rush and i unintentionally create plot holes. i make mistakes with grammar too (i only write in English, and it is my third language). there are a lot of things that i need to work on :'D but I'm trying every day!
18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
i'm cool with it!
19. First fandom you wrote in?
ever? definitely one direction LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL but on my current ao3 account so far i wrote my first fic for peaky
20. Favorite fic you've written?
based on how much it's challenging me and how it brings me joy, daylight
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peopleās takes on fic stuff fucking baffles me. i see people going on and on about word counts and complaining when updates ātake too longā or refusing to read wips entirely bc theyāre too impatient and i justā¦ i cannot understand this shit.
i know that the majority of these people have had to write something for a class in school at some point. it took you weeks to write a five paragraph essay for a grade. most of the time, thatās less than 1k words.
thereās nanowrimo, where the usual goal is to write 50k words in one month. which is understood by participants as an incredibly challenging goal. itās hard. most people who start donāt complete it in time. it takes a lot of dedicated time. itās exhausting. and there are so many fics out there that are significantly longer than this - and you can read them for fucking free!!!
it breaks my brain how people donāt seem to understand how much effort and time it actually takes to write something.
itās even wilder to me that people will just skip over fics entirely based off of how many hits or kudos they have. why even bother searching by ship or tags or what have you if youāre just going to discount 90%+ of your search based off of how many people read it before you. the more common place that becomes, the less amazing fics will end up getting read in the first place. it takes hits to make hits.
all of this is just so wild to me i cannot wrap my brain around it. and i hate going into fic writing for this fandom knowing damn well that iām in a fandom where people who might genuinely enjoy something i spent hours of my time on will never even consider glancing at it because iām not āpopularā enough. i donāt publish fics for clout and approval, but thereās a reason why i share them in the first place. iāve written plenty of fics just for myself, or for a few friends to read. but if i take the time to publish and post something, itās because i want to share it! i put it out there hoping that other people might enjoy it like i do. because sharing that feels good. and it sucks to think that there are people who might have shared in that enjoyment with me, who will never see it because weāve started putting this weird standard on shit.
i donāt know about other writers, but thatās exactly what iām talking about when i say that fandom dynamics as of late are sucking the joy out of creating. i write because it brings me joy. i publish/post/share because seeing something i wrote bring someone else joy, brings me even more joy. and watching this whole shitstorm of people being shit to fic writers or completely discounting most fics for one reason or other, just cuts that down so much for me.
idk i have a lot of thoughts and feeling about this but at the end of the day it frustrating and, at times, a bit heartbreaking.
honestly you said it all. all of this.
one thing i wanna add is in regards to nanowrimo: 50k words in a month (1667 words a day btw) is incredibly hard and a lot of people don't manage it, but a common factor i've witnessed between those that have done it is that they went into it having fully planned out their stories. because writing isn't only putting down words on paper, you have to figure out what to write, if you want a great plot you usually have to plan for that, and even once you've written it all you still have to go over everything and edit it. there is even more time and effort that goes into writing that people don't see and just take for granted. it's absolutely a labor of love, and the labor part is strongly emphasised here, and still we offer it for free only for people to be bitchy about it
i just hope you keep the joy of it all, because the entire point of fandom should be that it's done for fun and with the purpose of bringing you fun...
sending you all the love there, at least we are enough people in this fandom who write and draw and cosplay and make edits and all the other things there are for creation that we can support each other through it all
#asks#gotta be honest i didnt even know you could send asks this long i thought there was a character limit of like tweet length...#giving you a hug rn#keep on writing#itll get better again eventually#it has to cause the only other alternative is that the fandom disappears completely
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im just gonna type this post out bc no one will see it (dante and olivia might) but I just need these thoughts to be expressed. online. into the screaming void of the internet which is of course not a screaming void but whatever whatever
sometimes I feel so like. unbalanced in love. Like. its interesting and also maybe terrible? Its like I get love in giant hits but never consistently. And its all different types of love too and never at the same time, so it never like. it never really feels like i'm FULL on love. Like theres that one piece of writing from a cql fanfic, fuck, wait, let me find it
"Wei Ying has always had a heart that could swallow the universe whole, that would teeter over the precipice dividing love and war and leap blindly. He had resigned himself to the likelihood that no one would ever quite feel for him as he felt for them." I think thats by afterwords by silkwings but im pretty sure they deleted their fic
I just feel greedy for it sometimes, I feel starving for love, I feel like scrabbling at scraps for love. And sometimes (not all the time, sometimes) I feel like "no one would ever feel for [me] as [i] feel for them"
at the same time though i'm NOT scrabbling at scraps of love, i'm NOT.
I'm given love pretty consistently. When olivia and I have our silly little talks about dr who or er or temeraire thats just. well thats just olivia and I. thats the love we have. we talk and I love it and we can talk about the stupidest things but its just. its just a chance to hear each others voice and to say "hey I love you. talk to me about something that matters to you and I will listen."
and the same goes for dante but I feel like I am not sharing an interest with him and i'm seriously considering getting into lego boats or something just so we can share that. not out of guilt or anything like obligation. i just love talking to dante. I love sharing interests with him. I love when he talks abt the things he likes. and dante always responds to me with so much empathy and understanding. Whenever I have a bad time dante is like yeah bud I get you. I honestly feel like a tiny bit bad that i'm not into boats bc I can just see how much joy that brings dante and like...I wanna get in on that.
And like. again I am given love. Best example is mumma messaging me recently and just basically saying "oh, yeah, my first book is dedicated to you. You didn't know that? of course it was."
but in a way, way nicer phrasing, and in little shared pieces of jargon just between us. I cried on the train home yesterday.
I'm so rich in love from these people.
and sometimes my coworker lena, who cracks my back and hums "damn that sucks" when I complain about my rotten family. Shes brilliant she really gives as much as she can to love me its just.
But who else do I have? yknow? I know there are orher people who love me but who do I TRUST to love me? Who can I even LET love me? Certainly not my biofam. They don't even know me. It's never enough it will never be enough.
As much as my Mumma will love every poem and every story ive ever written, and how she will shower me with praise, and be proud of me just for getting out of bed and staying alive, I want Sheila Monahan to apologize, fuck, I want her to BEG for my forgiveness for how she treated me.
just like in general:
(apologize for hitting me. Apologize for smacking a vaccuum cord around my knees when I was like. 10, idk. apologize for constantly calling me a bitch or a cunt when I was in high school. I deserve so, SO many apologies from her. apologize for the time you saw me do poetry in front of 4k people and asked "when can i leave?")
AND HEY, SHEILA, APOLOGIZE FOR HITTING AND CALLING ME A MEAN BITCH ON MY FIRST SLEIGH BELLS CONCERT. I've never been to a bells concert since them and my only memory of them is tainted by you calling me a cunt. Sheila. you suck.
but the apology I want the most is just. Sorry I never listened to your writing. I just want my biomom to tell me my writing is lovely. Bc its the thing im good at, i'm ALWAYS good at writing. And when I did yearbook she never even read it.
At least my dad read it. I still don't trust that man, I think he's a coward for allowing my mother to be terrible to me, but he read my words, and liked them.
yearbook was beautiful. yearbook was a work of art I will never replicate.
And the people that matter love it. Olivia and dante have seen it and read it and love it.
My biological father actually loves it very much. He says it's rockstar material. He was gonna show it to his coworkers.
But Sheila didnt even read it. She didnt even read the parts where i tried to commit suicie multiple times. bc if she did she might have cornered me.
But god. I just think.
what a horrible family I have that my father will allow my mother to ignore my attempts.
What awful people.
what deeply awful humans.
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Hi, I saw that you were taking requests for Eddie Munson and I am in desperate need for fluff. How about Eddie and a shy, nerdy (book smart), and quiet s/o? Like they haven't gotten together yet and it's literally them realizing that "oh hey those are feelings. wait-" when they start talking and realize they have things in common. Bonus points if s/o is Dustin's older sibling and if it'd be alright, could it be gender neutral?
pairing: eddie munson x henderson!gn!readerĀ
word count:Ā 3.3k
warnings/cw/tw: somewhat cutesy stuff. reader being a lil dense to eddieās advances tbh. pretty eddie bc we all need it rn <3Ā no pronouns were used with minimal petnames. if i slipped up somewhere, pls tell me and i'll correct it asap!
a/n: aaaa iām not really sure if this is exactly what you were asking for but i tried hhh š„ŗ god i was in desperate need of something cutesy rn so this was my best shot at the moment kjsdjkjf itās not as long as my other stuff, but it did bring me some joy writing this out for you cā: i hope itās kinda to your liking!
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how you and eddie āthe freakā munson became... somewhat friends was beyond you. well, actually, scratch that. you could probably pinpoint the direct cause as to why youāre friends now, after years of being in the same school, passing each other in the hallways, in the same proximity but never in the same inner circle.Ā
dustin.Ā
being the eldest henderson didnāt have the best perks, you see. for example, now that you were able to drive and have your own car, your mom expected you to drive him everywhere. to and from school, that, you could understand. sure, you could drive him to mike or lucasās house when they wanted to hang out. that didnāt bother you much, you supposed. that was usually during the weekend anyway, so itās not like it took up too much of your time (not that you were busy during the weekdays anyway, you didnāt have many friends and you werenāt really the type to hang out on the weekdays ā those days were dedicated to studying and studying only).Ā
but one thing that was, honestly, starting to annoy you a bit was having to pick him after his little āhellfire clubā. you knew it was something important for dustin ā you have never seen him so excited about something before. never like this. so you cut him some slack, putting your studying aside sometimes so you could pick him up.Ā
coincidentally, the first time you picked him up from āhellfireā was the first time you encountered eddie directly.
you wrapped your arms around yourself as you leaned against your car, your sneakers scruffing up against the pavement as you waited for your kid brother to come running out those double doors. you glanced around the (almost) empty parking lot, eyes lingering on the dingy van a few spots away from yours before a sigh ripped from your lips.
āwhatās taking you so long, dustin?ā you mumbled, an annoyed tone in your words. you had actually gotten there a little late, mind occupied with studying, wanting to do your best on that history exam you have the next day. when you realized you were already ten minutes past the original time dustin asked you to pick him up, you were scrambling off your bed, not bothering to change from your pajamas (just an old, oversized sweater and some sweatpants). you were worried that stubborn boy would have started walking home ā but imagine your surprise when you got to the school and there was nothing. no soul around. you were a little thrown off at howā¦ barren the school looked at night. you werenāt a scaredy-cat, but you really didnāt want to stay out here any longer than you had to.Ā
just as you were about to push yourself off your car and make your way into the building (because who knows? maybe dustinās club meeting or whatever really did end already and someone was able to give him a ride back home, is what you were hoping for), the double doors burst open, your kid brother in tow as he laughed along with the other guys that trailed out the school.Ā
you watched dustin for a second, before glancing over to the tall figure whose eyes were already set on your face, a small smirk gracing his (surprisingly) handsome face.Ā
āwell, well, well. and just who do we have here, huh, henderson?ā eddie munson came to a stop in front of you, his hands tucked safely inside his back pockets as he rocked on the heels of his boots, large, doe-like eyes staring into yours, before they briefly glanced down at your figure, amused at what youāre wearing.Ā
your cheeks flushed slightly, not only at the way he looked at you but also because you werenāt good when it comes to talking to people. you always stuck to yourself, hence why you barely have one, maybe two true friends, all throughout high school. you werenāt like eddie and his extroverted self, who called for your attention almost every single time during lunch, who demanded your eyes to never once stray away from him when he gave one of his usual performances of calling out the social groups in high school (aiming to piss off the jocks, more than anything else). your lips parted, a small āuhā¦ā coming from you before dustin came to your ārescueā.
āeddie, this is (y/n), my older sibling. (y/n), this is eddie, remember?ā dustin gave you a wide, lopsided grin, revealing his braces as they glinted slightly from the moonlight.Ā
you werenāt sure what to say so all you did was nod your head towards eddie, before awkwardly raising your hand and giving him a slight wave. yeah, dustin definitely got the better social skills in the family, something that you werenāt sure if you were grateful for, just yet.Ā
āhuh!ā eddie jumped back slightly, albeit a little dramatically, as he pointed between you and dustin, āyou two? siblings? henderson! how dare you keep this beautiful creature away from me for so long? you wound me!āĀ
dustin looked at eddie like a fish out of water, waving his hands as he tried to explain himself. you knew eddie was just messing with him, but you had to admit ā it made you giggle softly at how the man strung dustin along, feigning hurt and sadness as he gave him shit for āhiding you away from himā.Ā
it finally took dustin about five minutes for him to throw his hands up in frustration and stomp his way to your car, getting into the passenger side as he grumbled on and onĀ about eddie and the shit he puts him through ā (āhow was i suppose to know you didnāt know i had a sibling?! uh, we share the same last name, last i remember!ā āuh uh, not the point, henderson!ā). boys, really.Ā
with a shake of your head, you turned your back on eddie, hand grasping the handle already when he popped his head next to yours, a surprised squeak leaving your lips at the sudden intrusion of personal space, your faces inches away from each other. āsee ya around, pretty.ā he gave you a little wink before he was practically prancing ā bouncing? ā his way to his van.Ā
you werenāt even going to get into the way your heart fluttered when he called you āprettyā. he thought you were āprettyā?
ā(y/n)! uh, hellooooo?! we gotta get home now! are you even listening to me!ā dustinās shriek made you roll your eyes at the boy, quickly getting into your car and driving away, ignoring his insistent questions of āwhat did he say to you?!ā. god, were you the older sibling, or was he?
since that day, eddie munson has become a constant in your life. he was never around and all of the sudden, he was simply everywhere. poking you in the ribs in the hallways. scaring you by suddenly appearing right in your face when you close your locker. he even started getting into the habit of following you into the library, disrupting your studying time during lunch ā dustin has complained to you on more than one occasion about how eddie is following after you like a lost puppy. you knew that wasnāt true, but as the weeks started to roll by, you started thinking more about it. why is eddie munson all of the sudden taking an interest in you? with all of his teasings, and simply hanging out around you, you have hardly spoken to him. a couple of words here and there ā talking to others, especially men, wasnāt something that you were good at.Ā
when dustin became attached to steve harrington, it took you months to have a full-on conversation with him, and even then, it was something simple as asking if he could put a movie you wanted to see to the side, nothing really personal. so why was eddie still sticking by your side even though he was the one mainly talking? that had to be annoying or boring to him, right? once or twice, there was a guy who would try to pursue you, trying to talk you up, but soon enough, they would get aggravated at how much you didnātā¦ talk or contribute to the conversations that they just gave up. so really, eddie is probably going to get bored one way or the other, you were sure of it. except this time, you werenāt sure if you wanted that to happen. youā¦ liked his presence. you werenāt sure if you were ready for him to leave your side.
except, it didnāt end up like that.
it was just a normal day for you. tuesday. tuesdays were always boring, in a sense, but it was also the day that you had the pick dustin up from his āhellfireā club. normally, you would have gone home and used a couple of hours to study before ultimately making your way back to the school to pick him up.Ā
however, you wanted to do things a little differently this time. you received special permission from the schoolās librarian to stay after school hours in the library. she knew you werenāt the type to do anything stupid and she trusted you enough to leave you alone in the large, book-filled room for a couple of extra hours. for once, your quiet nature came in handy.Ā
so thatās how you found yourself, at almost six thirty in the afternoon, sitting near the front of the library with your back to the door, at one of the many empty tables there. you had binders spread all over, notes upon notes in front of you in neat stacks. dustin always said you went overboard, but you couldnāt help it. being smart was your thing. at least, you tried to make it your thing. you werenāt charismatic or witty or funny or charming. if you wanted to get into a good enough college after graduation, you needed to have the grades for it.Ā
you placed your head in your hands, eyes lazily glancing around the papers that seemed to have swarming words. you shut your eyes tightly, letting out a soft sigh. you were overdoing it. maybe a break wouldnāt be so badā¦
you reached inside your bookbag, pulling out your walkman. you slipped the headphones over your ears and pressed play, not really caring what you had on at the moment. few seconds in and the familiar guitar riff that came from the band iron maiden filled your ears. you felt your shoulders relax a bit, a lazy smile on your face. of course, you had forgotten all about this. you had just recently discovered iron maiden and they were, by far, your favorite artist to listen to at the moment. not exactly studying or relaxing music, but it calmed your nerves in a strange way.Ā
you pushed yourself away from the table and took your time just exploring the library, the stillness surrounding you pushing you further and further into your mind, aimlessly walking around the room, before somehow making your way out of the library. your fingers gently ran against the walls and lockers, a faint hum coming from your lips as you got into the music.Ā
a long while passed by, and before you knew it, the cassette arrived at the end and it was time for you to replay it again. however, you werenāt given the chance to.Ā
āiron maiden? iāll be damned, i didnāt take you as the type of person to listen to them, henderson.ā
āshit!ā you let out a loud curse, yanking the headphones away from your ears as you twirled around, finding a grinning eddie in front of you, leaning against the lockers with his arms crossed against his chest.Ā
āsorry, sweetheart. did i scare ya?ā he held his hands up in mock surrender, meaning no harm to you. imagine his surprise, after taking a quick bathroom break from his campaign (much to the member's annoyance), that he would end up bumping into the eldest henderson, oblivious to the entire world as they hummed along to iron maiden. oh, the things that did to his poor little heart.Ā
especially now, looking at the way your cheeks flush red. it was cute, really. he always thought you were cute, in an innocent way. but he wonāt lie ā your taste in music intrigued him. he wasnāt expecting that out of sweet, little ole nerdy henderson.Ā
āso? iron maiden?ā he pressed again after a few moments of silence, wondering if you would talk to him this time. it did frustrate him in the beginning when you wouldnāt talk back, would just smile or give him nonverbal responses to any of his questions ā kid henderson had to almost beat it into eddieās head that you werenāt good with talking, conversations, or anything like that ā so he calmed down a little, wanting to go at your pace, and just take what you were willing to give.Ā
you stared at the man in front of you for a few more seconds, pursing your lips slightly as you tried to prepare yourself, build yourself up for your next words.Ā
āyeahā¦ iron maiden. they areā¦ my favorite at the moment.ā your words were soft, weak ā as if it took a lot of you to say them.Ā
but it made eddie smile proudly at you. that was the first, complete sentence you had ever spoken to him. hearing your voice more clearly now made himā¦ excited? flustered? he wasnāt too sure.Ā
āsweet, henderson! ya know, i expected something like blondie or madonna from you, but iron maiden? now, thatās fucking hot,ā eddie cackled softly, pushing himself off the lockers and walking towards you, falling into step with you as you started to make your way back to the library, an embarrassed look on your face.Ā
āiā¦ like them too, but i guessā¦ iron maiden really caught my eye. they sound really goodā¦ā you twiddled with your headphones, trying to keep yourself busy to focus on anything else except the fact that you were actually talking to eddie munson right now ā without stumbling over your words!Ā
eddie nodded his head to your words, stuffing his hands in his pockets, āām more of a black sabbath guy, myself, but iron maiden has some good shit too. so, canāt blame ya, henderson. you got some good taste in you, huh?ā he teased you, gently nudging your ribs with his elbow, which made you giggle softly ā not your fault you were a ticklish person.Ā
āi suppose youāre rightā¦ do you suggest i listen toā¦ uh, black sabbath, too?ā you tried your best to keep the conversation going, eyes glancing over at his face briefly before looking away when you made eye contact. the way your chest squeezed is something that has been happening more and more the longer eddie kept on hanging out around you.Ā
āhm,ā eddie hummed softly, glancing up at the ceiling as he mulled over your question. āi say ā fuck yeah!ā he clapped his hands loudly at a sudden thought, jumping in front of you to stop you from walking, wagging a finger in your face, āhow about this, sweetheart. how about i make ya a mixtape of all the songs i recommend listening to? think about it, your very own eddie mixtape!ā he looked so excited ā almost like a puppy waiting for a treat, for something, anything. he searched your face, waiting for your response.
the more you stared at him, the more you realized you didnāt want that look to go away. he looked soā¦ happy, so excited. his smile was so pretty, you wanted him to smile at you all the time now. before you knew it, you were nodding your head in agreement with his words, the man clapping his hands in excitement before he bounced over to you, swinging an arm around your shoulders.Ā
āyou wonāt regret it, sweetheart! iāll recommend ya all the good shit!ā eddie laughed softly as he tugged you down the hallway, his hand casually rubbing against your bicep. the butterflies hadnāt stopped fluttering in your tummy yet. the casual skinship between you two was making your mind go into a frenzy. obviously, it meant nothing to him ā but it meant something to you. what that something was, you werenāt sure. you hardly even give dustin hugs at this point. what was so different about eddie that youād just let him hold you like this without so much as a protest? get your mind together, (y/n).Ā
before long, eddie had brought you back to the library, his hand still lingering on your bicep for a moment before he pulled away, looking over at you with a lazy grin. āhome sweet home, sweetheart,ā he waved his hand towards the libraryās door.Ā
he gave you a theatric bow but before he could leave, you blurted out, āwait, did you know i was here the whole time?ā
he blinked at you in surprise, a blotch of red forming on his cheeks as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, āuh, well, yeahā¦ kinda had to beat it out of your kid brother ā mentioned your name and something about you being in the school, but didnāt want to tell me. a little threat of canceling the campaign had him spilling his guts to me, though!ā he cackled at the end of his little rambling before he stopped abruptly, his cheeks flushing even redder as he stared into your equally wide eyes with his own, āshit, that was creepy, wasnāt it?ā
you werenāt sure what got into you when you shook your head, words tumbling out of your mouth in a hurry, ānoā¦ no, i mean ā that wasnāt creepy, itās okay, eddie!ā you all but squeaked out, still shaking your head.Ā
eddie continued to rub at the back of his neck before his fingers came forward to play with the end of his long hair, pressing it against his cheek and lips as he stared at you with almost a shy expression.Ā
āhey, listenā¦ā eddie began slowly, inching forward towards you, ādo you wanna, like, actually hang out one day? youāre a cool person, obviously have at least a decent taste in music,ā he shot you a teasing wink, āyou justā¦ seem like someone i wanna get to know better, in a place thatās not school,ā he emphasized towards the end, knowing how much school took over your social life ā if you could even call it that.Ā
you gulped slightly as you stared at eddie, your fingers gripping your headphones tightly as you tried to think over his proposition. it was nearing the end of the year, you were so close to graduating, you had the grades. hanging out with eddie munson is harmless. besides, deep down, you knew you really, really wanted to hang out with him. for longer. get to know this interesting person.Ā
it took you a bit, but you slowly nodded your head, giving eddie a soft smile as you mumbled out quietly, āyeahā¦ yeah, iād really like that, eddie. iā¦ wanna get to know you better, too.ā it took everything in you to not run away with the way the long-haired man was looking at you, his eyes so hopeful, so open.Ā
at your agreement, eddie whispered out a soft āfuck yeah!ā, pumping his fist up in the air before wrapping you in a tight hug. he pulled away quickly, though, before you could even respond, āshit, sorry! got a little too excited there!ā eddie laughed sheepishly, shaking his head at himself before starting to walk backwards down the hall, staring at you with a wide grin, āmaybe we can do something tomorrow? what do you say?ā
tomorrow? oh, god. this was actually happening. you steeled your nerves and nodded your head, cheeks still red and heart hammering against your chest as you spoke louder than you had before, āyeah! justā¦ just pick me up tomorrow. whatever you want to do tomorrow, iām okay with!āĀ
eddieās eyes widened at the volume of your voice before he chuckled and gave you a two-finger salute, finally turning around as he said, āgot it, sweetheart. itās a date then!āĀ
a date.
a date?
holy shit, you have a date with eddie munson.
dustin is so not going to be happy about this one.
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#eddie munson#eddie munson x y/n#eddie x reader#stranger things imagine#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson x you#eddie stranger things#eddie munson fanfic#eddie munson fluff
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(re: your post abt someone qrting your art with a shitty comment) not to be a creep or anything but this had me curious so i went and looked - that personās entire twitter is them being a hater qrting art (almost exclusively art w levi in it) with shitty comments, and just being mean for no reason.
iām not an artist so i donāt know how comments like that really feel, or how it can impact your drive to continue creating. i can only image that itās awful and disheartening and can wear down on you. itās terrible and iām so sorry you have to experience it :(
your art and writing are truly gifts to the world, and anyone would be a fool to disagree. donļæ½ļæ½ļæ½t let someone with hate in their heart (and complete inability to mind their own goddamn business) overshadow the joy you feel when creating art, or the joy your art brings to others.
(again im so so sorry if this is weird/creepy bc weāve never talked but people being shitty for no reason makes me so angry and i want to offer any words of support that i can) š¤
Hiya I actually looked at their Twitter too to see if they were doing it to other people but having other people pretty much confirm what my gut was telling me actually helped so thank you! Ffjdjdj I truly don't understand taking the time to leave such mean comments on art that has nothing to do with them let alone dedicating an entire account to do it. God I wish I had that kinda free time.
It's really discouraging to see rude shit like that like even if it's in another language there's literally a translate button right below the tweet so š ofc the translation won't always bee 100% accurate but honestly if anyone even comes off slightly rude I'm just gonna block them for my own sanity. It's this kinda behavior I hate on other sites bc its a lot more prevalent than here in my experience.
Ill be okay, I just hope other artists they were saying shit about don't feel too bad š nothing you said was weird or creepy at all I really appreciate this message, it amde me feel so much better so really, thank you ā¤ļø
#i wanted to do n.s.fw stuff on twt but tbh idk#i might juat keep it here or something im not sure yet#but tysm ur words meant a lot ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
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I love your Anko fanart! Tell me, what are your views/headcannons on Anko X Kazuku?
hThank you so much for the ask, finally I can answer it
here is my big thank you for the waitng
In a nutshell, the shipp was created by accident while me and my buddy were working on our first Naruto AU in 2019, where Kakuzu and Deidara survived their shitty plotholes end eventually ended up in Konoha
Yeah
so, the shippās birth date is july the 1, 2019
anything like classy, aristocracy kind of tension-filled passionate gothic romance with playful, psychological games & hurt/comfort vibes with slight scent of rivalry is KakuAnko
Basically, they are: a very, very old man with absolutely horrendous background whoās trying to finally have his mother*cking 10 or 30 years of peace, and a rather young lady with a rocky youth whoās being good & noble yet has very strong antihero tendencies
You know, I think they do have potential, since, in fact, they seem to be very similar, at the core
They are both very pragmatic realists, the people of logic and reason, yet if Kakuzuās irritability doesnāt affect him a tiny bit due to his ideal self-control, Ankoās can lead her to quite bad places, sometimes. They put their interests in the first place, and even though she tries to attach them to Konohaās, she still has āpersonalā things (Iāll write ābout it lower*). Their mindsets are so complicatedly organized that, at some point & way, it prevents them from having many close people, and makes them very hard to see through and predict
Both of them are very flexible & adaptive, independent individuals with similar outlooks on plenty of things and high intellectual level. They clearly can find plenty of traits that they would highly respect and adore in each other
Here I will speak mostly for āwhy and howā kind of things, bc both of them are terribly tricky to accurately figure out. But there will be some headcanons too
So, there are still some odds about them, due to the strong difference in their occupation, like, in plenty of cases they are really tricky to be brought together, because:
- Of the job
In original, Anko is a Konohaās special jounin, and she is very dedicated to serving the country. Independently of whether she likes her job or not (depends on the plot), she orienteers at the people, at societyās gain from her work. So, accordingly, in any other AU her job is somehow connected to civil service, whether itās something police-like, connected to science, or something like CCG in Tokyo Ghoul
Kakuzu, on the other hand, is a hitman and a persona non grata in literally all the five big countries, Konoha too (which makes it barely possible to bring them together in the original universe without hard complications or heavy drama. But still possible). He orienteers on his own gain alone, but, depending on the job, it can include othersā gain, too.
This detail makes him a saint once he holds supervising position in some company or any high position in the government (the better the working conditions of the staff now- the more money in the prospective), and the sheer nightmare once he has it on the opposite side of the law. Him as a mob boss is a complete different topic for discussion, but to get the point, in this case, the trouble isnāt him increasing the level of criminality (its rather vice-versa), but taking hold of too much control in the high and underground structures. Even as an ordinary hitman heās rather tricky, since everything depends on the case
In most of the stories, they come to some sort of compromise, and how hard it is to reach it depends on how shitty his job is and how attached they are to each other at the moment
Like, in the above mentioned Shippuden AU and Harry Potter AU (which I also wrote with my buddy) everything went like clockwork, because there they are both more or less on this side of the law, in Tokyo Ghoul AU (which I also wrote with my buddy) it is a bit more complicated, with her being in-law and him being very much outlaw, in the Avatar AU (which I also figured out with my buddy, but we never happened to write it) it is also pretty smooth, with both of them being outlaws and then jumping out to the glory after all the shit is done, but in another Shippuden AU of mine, this all would be just a motherfucking bloody disaster
- Kakuzu is actually a hard nut to get attached to anyone
He lived too long to be truly afraid of anything, though. Its mostly because he doesnāt really need to get attached to or become close with someone to satisfy his need for communication. The man can get along with anyone once he wishes to, he can have countless acquaintances and plenty of buddies, but he doesnāt have many comrades and barely can call anyone a friend. Because he is used to lose everything and everyone he ever had or happened to have, because of his inhumanly lengthened lifespan.
It requires time for him to get used to the person, and then, eventually, in some cases, spend plenty of it to get attached
Plus, for him, due to his profession, each close connection is a really great responsibility for him. In most cases, heād think twice of weather he is ready to take it or not
Though it of course has the personal factor, too
In Ankoās case, she has a grand privilege by being a very intelligent and keen woman, not just in cognitive plane, but in emotional, too. High emotional intellect is actually a rare trait, so she automatically stands out of the crowd for him. Even though it wonāt guarantee his alliance, it will grant her his high respect and some sort of sympathy
- Kakuzu is, technically, an asshole
He does have his moral compass, which includes a great amount of common social morality, but he also has that āI am workingā state
Even though Kakusu has a set of professional principles, and he still acts accordingly to what he thinks is right, one and the very same situation can be solved diametrically different once the context changes from working to casual and vice versa
This, and him being very independent and quite antisocial, makes the degree of assholeness depend on various factors
This can lead to major conflicts of interests, and if they are possible to have any compromise or not is strongly attached to the circumstances. After all, both are very, very prideful and dignified people
- In other words, the only major issue for them would be morality questions. Itās possible to make the case acceptable for Anko, since both of them aināt truly squeaky clean, along with Kakuzu being willing enough to watch his borders
- She is provident and doesnāt really need a lot of money on a daily basis, which is much of a joy to him lol
- *they both seek for the stable ground, first of all
Taking in consideration the life conditions Kakuzu had in his youth (despite war state, he still stably had family, friends, grand respect from everyone, home, warmth and food) and how terribly he was torn out of his secured social environment, I believe what he seeks through all his bounty hunt and other money-connected manipulations is stability. Sustainability he had back then. The only way to have it in the conditions of our existent world order is to have money (and a very good mind and luck)
Anko has indeed much more altruistic motives, yet itās still not that simple. It seems to be, on the first sight, yet considering the āOrochimaru related casesā and her very wayward behavior toward them, itās clear she keeps her own motives and needs in mind oh so well. The service she has is very well payed, it allows her to do what she likes or believes is right, and to have the living conditions she finds comfortable. And only here, relying on the made sustainable basis, she does what she does
- Thus, they both illustrate the principle āfirst help yourself, next help the otherā just right
- She knows she can keep an eye on him, yet itās clear for her that her influence isnāt borderless, as well as telling him off some stuff is kind of a not wise thing to do. So in the majority of cases, she never interferes
- This is not common, yet he can actually change some plans if the situation is serious and the compromise canāt be found. He is that kind of person who works on a further prospective, and in this context, this would be the relationship with his loved one
- While Kakuzu is quite conflicted and has very reserved controversial persona, Anko is both controversial, conflicted, and sort of two-faced, on top of that
She is a very sincere, cheerful and humbly honest human being, yet she has some darker natural traits of her character that became rather strong with age and traumatic experience. Cunningness, guile, ways-depend-on-the-case and a bit of ruthlessness, that is. Moreover, she has some unsolved personal issues, which makes her even more twisted.
Like, remember the time when she confronted Orochimaru during the exam? And Kabuto, on the war? Getting rid of them is indeed beneficial for Konoha, but itās clear that for her it is personal vendetta in the first place. She wouldnāt have tried to do this alone, otherwise, because these two are rather dangerous ones, to say the least.
She uses greater good to cover her real motives (even though it is not truly complete bullshit), and seems to have a terrible habit to keep silence about really important things, which makes her quite prone to lying, in some cases
And sometimes it very badly pisses Kakuzu off, since it makes her prone to doing useless but dangerous shit too
Yet this not any kind of separate hidden side, it is integrated into her personality, and coexists with her bright one. Thatās where her violent humour comes from, for example.
But Kakuzu, on the other side, is completely monolith individual, yet sometimes his mindset can create contradictions when it comes to something important to him. but it's another topic
And seeing these layered constructions, and motives, they can pretty finely predict each otherās behavior. Not super-neatly, but they for sure see the basis. This is what helps Kakuzu to prevent Anko from doing some stupid shit, sometimes
- Anko has a role of an indicator for the people who donāt understand and see the changes in Kakuzuās mood sometimes, since she usually reacts quite openly. Yet, when she has the same unreadable mask of cold, or one of guile, itās a nightmare for them
- They prefer the non-verbal way to show their feelings, even though Anko is obviously the more chatty one
- They donāt say things such as āI love youā, or other sensual stuff like that really often, believing it to be some sort of cherished words that shall not be spelled mindlessly
- Anko isnāt majorly into PDA, but she fancies it much more than Kakuzu does. She has her whole moments of studying something with her hands, whether itās a hand, scar or face. Heās more into passive display of affection, like wrapping an arm over her waist or leaning to her or something of this kind; they can allow themselves to (not sexually) kiss in public though
- She knows he doesnāt like to walk hand in hand due to considering it a youthful thing, so there are times when she intentionally walks holding on to his sleeve; generally they walk separately in order not to bother each other, but sometimes they walk arm in arm (like an old Victorian couple lol)
- Being older and wiser, Kakuzu eventually upholds some kind of mentoring position, yet he never considers himself any kind of a teacher or master to Anko, believing her to have a good head of her own. He is just insightful enough to break something through to her or give a word of advise
- This, combined with his highly powerful demeanor, also makes him have the leading position in their relationship
- Anko respects him much enough to fortify this, entrusting with plenty of life questions (like organizing the family budget), even though they make the majority of decisions together. Mostly because he is truly wise and highly experienced individual.
- This makes him one of the very few people Anko would actually listen to and take their opinion in consideration
- So basically they have equal relationship with some tendency to patriarchal order
- And it is, really, mostly economically-based disbalance, with him earning much more than she does
- Yet they never have any financial-based issues, since both of them keep in mind and respect the contributions of each
- There is major power play here, too. He has the absolute might, she has seduction. Anko loves how he makes her want to submit to him, let him have all the power, so she likes provoking him. And she knows he adores it, loves the subtle control she has over him
- They donāt have conflicts in their everyday life. Each knows how to avoid pissing one another off
- He cherishes her playful demeanor, her intellect. Combined with her cunningness, it allows her to rival him, in social sphere. The way she constructs her phrases, the way she speaks, mimics, moves, how bewitchingly it suits her feminine snaky features makes his blood boil and heart melt
- Both of them, actually, have rather specific kind of dry, dark humour. Kakuzuās is very cynical, satirical, quite often menacing and subtly demeaning; Ankoās is very sarcastic and quite dirty, even gruesome and rather violent
- Sometimes they āfightā verbally as a form of a play. In some circumstances they may sound pretty vile, so some unobservant people mistake this for display of hate
- In general, Anko is the one to heat things up with her playful demeanor, which can include provocation and rivalry, and Kakuzu is the one to keep this energy in borders, accumulating it up to much more intense states
- They both put the comfort in the first place when it comes to household. Everything must be cozy, useful, silent and super clean
- Yet they are both very unpretentious and modest, really
- She absolutely adores when he is showing his serious, severe side, or powerful demeanor. She finds it incredibly suitable for him. She also likes how his real age is sliding out in this or that way. Like, even though he has rather young face (that of 37-40 y.o.), his eyes give away that heāve seen oh so much more than it seems; the grumpy noises and grunts he makes, the lazy attitude in movements and the way how rapidly he finds a comfy pose once he has a chance to take a seat
- They are both rather patriotic, yet while in the most stories Ankoās feelings mostly lay towards the country she lives in, Kakuzuās more often lay towards some places, so called small motherland.
- Kakuzu actually could be a source of deep, strong admiration and delight for her, despite all of his bullshit. The unbreakable will he has, mighty burning heart, all the wisdom, talents and mind. Being sent to fight god damn Hashirama, clearly a genius of his times, financial & management genius at the least. And, still, after all the hard times heāve been through, he maintained the very strong sense of dignity and nobility, even though slightly twisted due to the profession and abnormal lifespan
- And the very same things can serve as the source for her chagrin: with all those traits, he could have been so much more rather than a criminal. With all the gifts heāve got, he could have been of great use to society. Heās much easier about this, since his prospective is much wider and embraces decades (and in some universes even centuries) instead of months & years, and he knows that heād be switching sides throughout his life, being on this and that side of the law, yet he still is a bit uncomfortable once itās brought up
- They are deeply into science, which makes them atheists. Heās into medicine and human biology, sheās into chemistry and reptilian biology; both of them are nuts for physics, history and psychology
- They solve complicated physical and mathematical problems together time to time. She is the first one to have tea-breaks due to losing her temper over it, he tries to figure things out right until you can sense the smoke coming off his head
- Actually, they do have a stumbling stone aside from job & morality complications. And this is Ankoās attitude towards Orochimaru
What she does is basically ruins her life very-very slowly, maintaining the issues she has and planning to make him pay for all heās done
Kakuzu knows exactly what is really going on with this attitude and why, but he canāt really do anything about it. Like, he knows he canāt make her change her mind or put something into her head
All he can do is really nothing but try to explain how those things are working, and even this option is basically a landmine field for him. At some level she does understand that he could probably be right, yet she just refuses to go back on her mind. And this is actually really dangerous, so at some moments they can fight quite badly about it
- Heās scared shitless to lose her, though; especially like that, even though he knows clearly that he will, anyway, sooner or later
- he knows that losing loved ones ends up with sheer disaster for him, yet he isnāt afraid to pay such a high price for those six, five or four decades of being with her. Because these decades are that of a paradise ones for him. Wife and family, as well as stable job, incomes and life conditions, are some sort of physical definitions of sustainability he craves. Especially family, yet itās far ahead to plan
- The fact that he will have to bury her one day makes her rather depressed, as well as the knowledge that the only thing she can really do about it is to try to bring him as much happiness and comfort as possible before she dies
thank you, i'd say more, but it's too much already
#my art#naruto#naruto shipuden#akatsuki#naruto akatsuki#akatsuki kakuzu#kakuzu#naruto anko#mitarashi anko#kakuanko#they are very entertaining disaster
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I originally gave this idea to someone else awhile ago but I canāt find it anywhere anymore but I do remember it was a nice idea lmao and bc I love your writing Iāll give it to you as well!
Bacon bits Dabi x Polar opposite reader. And I mean this in literally every way possible. Like heās all black leather, rough and tough and sheās all pink glitter, soft and sweet.
I love you!! - š±š
From Cindy: Hello š±anon!!! Thanks for requesting this fun idea. At first I thought this was going to turn out to be kind of goofy, but then it ended up being kind of... sweet? I donāt know. Let me know what you think! I hope you enjoy it!
Opposites Attract (Dabi x Polar Opposite! Fem!Reader)
ā ļøThis story contains some spoilers about Dabiās past ā ļø
Nobody was more confused about how Dabi had ended up dating someone like you, who was so completely opposite to his personality in every way, than Dabi himself. He knew very well that it made no sense, and logically, everything about you should have grated on his nerves. Somehow though, it didnāt. Somehow, you two worked.
If you were to ask anyone else in the League of Villains, theyād snicker behind their hand before telling you that Dabi had mommy issues. The way you doted on your boyfriend so sweetly would have been nauseating to all of them if it werenāt for the fact that you were just as kind to the rest of them too. You were always quick to rush to their aid whenever you saw one of them looking hurt or upset, while Dabi preferred to make fun of them or just ignore them altogether.
āAre you sure you should even be with Dabi?ā Spinner would ask while you checked the bump heād gotten on his head from driving like a maniac during one of their missions. āYou could do so much better.ā
Dabi hated whenever they tried to put ideas of leaving him in your head, and sometimes he worried there was truth behind their teasing. He wouldnāt go as far as to say he had āmommy issues,ā but your soft and gentle nature did remind him of some of the less terrible times heād had during his childhood with his sister and mother. That was as far as the similarities went though, and he knew none of the people in his biological family would ever go out wearing hot pink or carry a bedazzled phone case. The one thing he did agree with completely was that you could do better than him, but he was too selfish to ever bring that up.
āLook at this one, Dabi!ā you smile while tilting your phone toward him, the light from the screen reflecting off his staples. āItās so cute.ā
Normally, Dabi wouldnāt be caught dead cuddling up in bed while scrolling through Instagram pictures of baby animals and cute latte art, but hearing your excited gasps and giggles calmed him down and kept his mind from drowning itself in the bitter hatred he felt toward the rest of the world. Honestly, Dabi envied your ability to find joy and happiness in such simple things. He hardly cared about anything anymore aside from the burning need to ruin Endeavor and all of hero society in general, so forcing him to spend time doing anything frivolous like that actually helped to keep him grounded in the present.
When you had first started dating Dabi, youād tried to get him to expand his clothing style a bit to include more colors, but that didnāt work out very well. Heād gotten extremely annoyed when you started showing him some outfits youād bookmarked on your phone that you wanted him to try, and he had rejected every single one. To get revenge for irritating him, heād snatched up your phone and started looking up some outfits heād like to see you try on. Of course they were all black and a couple of them even made you blush in embarrassment, causing him to smirk victoriously.
Even though changing his clothing style ended up being a bust, you had still somehow found ways to spend time together doing something fun you could both enjoy. One of Dabiās favorite things to do together was dye each otherās hair. Heād been a little nervous at first, letting you in on the secret that his hair wasnāt naturally black, but now he really enjoyed letting you take care of hiding the bright white strands of his roots while he closed his eyes and relaxed under your touch. He returned the favor of course, and made sure to give you a heavenly scalp massage while working the color into your hair.
Another thing Dabi actually liked doing was painting your nails. It had surprised you because he was the one to suggest it first after hearing you make a comment about how difficult it was to paint with your non dominant hand, and how you always messed up the wet paint on the hand youād already finished. Dabi didnāt mind helping you because it was another thing you could do together that also served as a soothing task that kept his inner demons under control.
āDoes it always have to be pink?ā heād ask with a huff every single time.
āYep!ā Youād tell him cheerfully, ābut Iāll let you pick the decals this time!ā
Usually you made him choose from different types of glitter or rhinestones, but every once in a while youād let him decorate your nails with little skulls or, when he was feeling especially sassy, blue flame stickers that youād special ordered online to surprise him.
When Dabi really allowed himself to think about it, he knew exactly why he was dating someone so different from himself. It was because you were the first person to ever keep him around because you wanted him there, not because you needed him. The whole reason heād even been born was to fulfill his fatherās sick fantasy of surpassing All Might, and there was no way the League of Villains would put up with his dark, reclusive behavior if it werenāt for his powerful quirk and dedication to the cause.
At the end of the day, dating Dabi didnāt benefit you in any way. He was mean and grumpy, plus he was a villain which made it hard for him to support you the way a partner should. The only explanation he could think of for you keeping him around was that you truly wanted him to be there, and having someone who could validate his existence like that was something heād craved since before heād even been old enough to understand that concept. So, he would endure the snide remarks from other people and sit through as many ridiculous Korean boy band music videos as you wanted if it meant keeping you in his life.
#Dabi x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader#Dabi#Bnha dabi#bnha#mha#cindy's writing#writing requests#š±anon
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Pining After You [hc]
Just some Haikyuu!! head cannons about my favorites pining after the object of their affectionāyou. Iām gonna limit myself to only one Seijoh 3rd year >_> instead, Iām just gonna make Makkiās super long bc love.
I might turn these into one shots. Iām planning a special series to be released for the entire month of Mayālet me know what you guys think!
Hanamaki;
Ya know, with my last head cannon, I had such a hard time writing for Makki and now thatās all I wanna do.
Cause THIS BOI is too easy-going, too cool, to ever be blunt and up front about his feelings for you. He canāt ruin his image by stumbling over a confession.
Definitely has been in love with you since your guysā first yearāall thanks to your laugh.
Every time he hears you, even if said laugh is occasionally broken with a gentle, genuine snort, Makki feels every single electrical pulse being sent into his nerve endings.
It was a huge part of the reason that he had started owning the class clown trope, cracking jokes with his peers and even the teachers even though that definitely was not kosher. But his almost dry, sarcastic sense of humor always seemed to be rewarded with the angelic gift that was your laughter.
But he doesnāt know how to talk to you. At all.
He tries really hard not to stare at you, or at least tries not to make it super obvious and fails considering you sit on the opposite ends of the classroom
Makki always has lunch in Mattunās classroom just so he can freely talk about something you did in class that made him laugh or smile, even if it was something stupid like you dropped your pencil or you raised your hand to answer a question.
In your third year, Mattsun is tIRED of it all.
āJust go fucking confess your feelings, I swear to gOD, or Iāll tell her.ā
āDude no, I canāt sheās way outta my league.ā
Did I mention Mattsun is over it? So over it that one day, instead of waiting for his best friend to come to his classroom for lunch, he decides to pay yours a visit.
Makkiās freaking out because the fCK was Mattsun walking over to your desk?!
āSheās coming to our tournament this weekend, so bring your A game.ā Was all he said before leaving the poor wing spiker to drown in the blood rising up his neck.
You werenāt friends with anyone on the VBC, but you did actually end up at the tournament with a few friends.
Exhilarating was the only way to describe it, up until Seijohās loss to Karasuno.
After the team thanked the spectators for watching, you noticed all the third years crying, signifying the end of their careers.
āThank you for inviting me to watch, Matsukawa. It was really fun.ā You said politely, approaching them afterwards.
Mattsun shoves his best friend towards you, āactually, he wanted to invite you. He just didnāt know how.ā
Makki.exe has stopped working. Heās too busy spluttering because he literally has no idea what to say to you now. Cool boy? Not even close.
āIāve actually wanted to come to one of your matches for awhile. I just thought it was weird because Iām not friends with any of you.ā
Oh. O H.
āY-you couldāve asked me...ā
āI was hoping youād ask me. Why do you think I always laugh at your jokes, Hanamaki?ā
āWait, does that mean you donāt think Iām actually funny?ā ššš Rip.
āI do. Youāre funny, talented, handsome, and Iāve liked you since first year.ā
Makki.exe has stopped working.
Akaashi;
Akaashi has studied everything he could about you without ever having actually interacted with you.
He knew you were in Bokutoās class, he knew your name, and that the two of you interacted often, but never outside of the classroom.
He knew that you always carried your school bag over your left shoulder, and tucked your hair behind your right ear when you felt it was in your face.
Your energy somehow matched his best friendās while simultaneously calming the owl captain like a gentle wave. You reminded Akaashi of the sun rising over the ocean.
Bokuto, oblivious to nearly everything, never realized that his best friendās calculations went beyond analyzing the ace. One small section of his brain was dedicated to your ass.
Really, there wasnāt anything extraordinary about you, or at least thatās how you felt about yourself. But every time Akaashi swung by Bokutoās class to walk with him to practice, his eyes were immediately drawn to you for .067 seconds before heād look away, so as not to make you feel uncomfortable.
Once in a while, Bokuto would let small details about you slip, like how you were in the art club and that you had a showcase coming up displaying the portfolio you had built over the last three years.
He definitely didnāt ditch practice to be there for your showcase.
Showing up to the venue where the showcase was being held, he suddenly felt very under dressed seeing other third years and teachers adorning formal attire while he showed up in black jeans and a grey button up.
Wandering around the venue, Akaashi looked for you or your artwork, his breath held in his lungs when he saw the arsenal of works displayed on large black boards with your name written elegantly at the very top. Made with various mediums, he was stunned by different paintings and drawings of surreal, exquisite landscapes that could not possibly exist.
Then again, he didnāt think you were real either.
One particular painting invoked a strange emotion in himāa large, desecrated shipwreck amongst of field of bright flowers with the sun setting in the back. Titled āCrack The Skyā, the piece emanated joy and grief in one. It was almost as stunning as you were.
āThis oneās my favorite.ā You announced sheepishly from beside him and he realized he had never heard your voice before. The setter turned to look at you, drinking in your appearance up close for the first time. āYouāre Bokutoās friend, arenāt you? Akaashi?ā
He was kinda hurt to hear you mention Bokuto for reasons unknown to himself jealous much?
āYeah. Itās nice to meet you.ā He bows slightly, remember that no matter how infatuated he was with you, you were still his senpai.
He began walking with you as you explained the creation process of your different pieces. Not that he was actually paying attention, though heād never admit that. He just liked hearing you talk and he would definitely never admit that.
You excuse yourself as your phone rings, though you donāt walk away, allowing him to hear your end of the conversation. āYep, heās here. I owe you dinner. You wanna talk to him?ā Akaashi cocks a brow in your direction, staring at your cellphone that youāve now held over to him. Bokutoās name flashed on the screen.
āUh, hi?ā The setter asked, confused.
āI made a bet with her that you would ditch practice to go to her showcase because yOu LoVe HeR.ā
Aight, imma head out.
Before he could run away out of embarrassment, you grabbed his wrist though you were still on the phone with Bokuto.
āWould you like to join us for dinner? Seems kinda unfair for him to get dinner when youāre the one who made the effort to be here.ā
Akaashi graciously accepts to which you respond by telling Bokuto where you would meet him for the evening.
āSo you love me, huh?ā ššš If Akaashi could magically disappear, he would. Or even better, if his blush ran hot enough to melt the skin off his face, thatād be great too.
But you never let go of his wrist until now, opting to wrap an arm around his instead.
āI like you too. Why do you think Bokuto and I made a bet about you coming here, silly?ā
Kenma;
Poor Kenma. The worst part of his whole situation was actually being friends with you, knowing he would never get to have you.
Why would you want him, anyway? You were more fit for someone like Kurooāsomeone who was as boisterous and confident as you were. He anticipated the day you two announced your relationship and left him behind in your little trio.
Not even Kuroo knew that he was in love with you and maybe that was a mistake on his part but he could never tell his best friend that you were his entire world. It was too embarrassing for him.
It took entirely too much energy to even sort through his feelings alone, how much more exhausting would it be for him to run through every single thing he felt about you to someone else?
Like the way you would nearly skip out your home every morning when the boys came to fetch you to walk to school together.
Or the way you unabashedly asked almost too personal of questions, or questions that were just soooo left field of you were friends with a person. āHey Kuroo, how many brushes do you think you would break if you finally decided to brush your hair after 17 years?ā Was one of Kenmaās favorites.
The way you sing along to every song that plays on your iPod or even the radio, even if you didnāt know the song, you would try to sing along anyway.
Some days, Kenma would look out the window and see you practicing some form of a dance routine in your backyard. He would watch you for hours until you went inside, suddenly feeling shame for being so creepy.
Nearly every night, Kenma just wished he could turn his feelings off while simultaneously wishing you were next to him so he could hold you while he slept.
Your smile was his favorite. Seeing you smile every morning as the three of you walked to school together was what got him through his day. āHey, hey are you guys coming to my dance competition tomorrow?ā You asked in your typical, jovial lilt.
āOf course.ā Was all he was able to reply, while Kuroo enthusiastically responded about their attendance.
āGreat! I canāt wait to see you guys in the crowd!ā
The āCā word, was almost enough to make Kenna regret his decision to come. Even more so when he was surrounded by the masses, all waiting to watch their respective dance teams. But it was for you, and he would do anything for you.
Kuroo was right beside him, a small bouquet of roses in his hand to give to you after you competed. The blood red flowers made Kenna glower and glare in secret, or as secretive as he could be. āI got these for you.ā The captain says quietly, handing them over to his best friend.
āSorry, Kuroo, I canāt say I return your feelingsāā
āFor you to give to her, you idiot.ā š¤”š¤”š¤” āIām not that dumb, Kenma.ā The setter really wanted to argue and say that he was, but your schoolās dance team was up to perform so he opted to stay quiet.
Have I mentioned that Kenma loves watching you dance? There was a reason he would watch you practice in your backyard. You moved with elegance and grace that was foreign and so opposite to his own demeanor, it was no wonder he was always so captivated by you.
After you compete, thereās a bit of downtime between the other competitors and the awards ceremony, giving you the chance to hang out with your besties.
āThese are for you.ā The second year says quietly, handing you the bouquet with a blush dusting over his cheeks. The red rivaled that of the roses.
āAw, thank you, Kenma!ā You squeaked out before giving him a kiss on the cheek, his skin burning even hotter. Kurooās just over there laughing but ya know.
During the awards ceremony, youāre sitting in a circle with your team not too far from your friends while they announced that Nekoma had taken first. Everyone in the dance troupe began screaming and hugging each other, while you ran straight to your boys.
While still jumping, you were hugging Kuroo so tight, arms squeezing around his neck while sharing the joy. Which made Kenma just a little bit jealous.
Just a little.
Until youāve settled down from your jumping before wrapping your arms his neck as well. But rather than going for a hugā
Wait what is hAPOENING
You brought your lips to his briefly before burying your face into his neck out of embarrassment because wHY you had thought that was a good idea was beyond you.
Deciding you couldnāt just keep holding onto him, because he was probably embarrassed too, you stepped away, ready to run back to your team. But Kenma didnāt let go, his arms seated securely at your hips as he stared at you.
āI-Iām sorry, I-I donāt know w-wāā
āI love you.ā
Wanna see a specific character? Or a different head cannon? Want to see a whole story?
Send in requests!
#haikyuu!! imagine#haikyuu!!#hanamaki takahiro#hanamaki x reader#haikyuu hanamaki#pining#aoba johsai#akaashi x reader#akaashi keiji#fukurodani#mattsun#matsukawa issei#bokuto koutarou#kozume kenma#kenma x reader#hq kenma#kenma fluff#kuroo#kuroo tetsurou#artist!reader#dancer!reader
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you know, it's astounding how quickly watching two vaguely campy cdramas with imperfect plotting and gay censorship but dedication to giving a good, loved story has gone a long way to healing me from the utter letdown/mess/heartbreak/slow car crash that was watching the 100 for 5/6 years
not even talking about the last season in general but even just focusing on the ending jrot decided on and how it was utterly devoid of joy and hope and any lasting morals. the bleakness of the idea of the last of humanity living out their days on a random beach without any hope for the future or hope for humanity..i can't even begin to understand what message they thought they were trying to send but it makes me depressed just thinking about it
and on the other hand you have these two random almost gay cdramas i stumbled upon by a friend finally succeeding in catching my interest. they are both based on books where characters are just as morally grey and tragic and yet even though the tv adaptations have to cancel the gays getting their novel-based canonical happy ending, they still manage to stay true to characters and story and deliver an ending that might break your heart but Makes Sense.
even in the ultra campy one riddled with plot holes and terrible cgi, and the two main characters literally dying in the end, there's such hope and humanity in the ending that you're crying out of sadness and happiness. the characters' deaths are Meaningful and add so much to the story and development of their character, and it literally ends with a nod towards them reincarnating and meeting again. like you can still have tragedy with hope infused! it's possible!!
and in the untamed there's so much tragedy in that story it hurts like it really is so bleak at times and yet the ending is so beautiful while being slightly open-ended that people literally write fic in the universe with that ending as opposed to the novel's where they get married bc there's so much rich opportunity to develop on what's there, to see characters heal and grow and reunite and love again after so much hurt
i haven't seen a single fic using the 100's ending without changing some major aspect of it (ie bringing bellamy back) because it's just lifeless. dead. there's nothing to build on, no character development to continue, nothing. that show will fade into oblivion being nothing but a letdown for both sides of two armies invested in it and for what? idk it just makes me mad how much potential that show had and it was just so. so badly ended. like actively terrible.
anyway i barely read fics for t100 anymore and am not currently working on my fic and that makes me sad in a way, and maybe I'll come back to it but idk im just constantly thinking about how two shows strangled by the government into not getting the Main Couple together still made it work and then there's this show where everything was ripe for the taking and everyone (including the network, probably) would have preferred you to just work with the story you had instead of holding a middle finger up to your fans while the ship (lol) is sinking and they were m/f for fucks sake literally no government is stopping that from happening oh my god...
anyway can you tell i have anger
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ooh, top 5 moments you've had/witnessed as a DM? (please use this an excuse to hype yourself up if you want!!)
my players make dmāing beyond worth it, so i really have to give credit to them for the joy of what they bring to a lot of these scenes <3 (also this is all wandering isles bc itās been my most narratively satisfying and invested dm experience) Buckle Up itās a long one!!!
bonus: iām very proud of my individual character moments! throughout the campaign weāve had about four of these (the intro session scenes, two dream sequences for every pc, and a set of individual trial scenes). weāre a pretty big party so itās hard to narrow it down, but i just love writing and running those longer narrative moments bc i think itās a v interesting insight into each character and gives them each a separate moment to shine <3
5.Ā āpromise youāll come back to herā / burning of contingency letters
i put these moments together perhaps to cheat a little bit, but also because they deserve it. xarus, the partyās barbarian whose family was abandoned by his mother at a young age pulls theresa, a forge knitting cleric about to board the airship he is a quartermaster of in order to find a cure for her sick wife. he asks theresa to promise him one thing, that no matter what she will come back to her wife. along the way they write contingency letters to their loved ones in and outside of the party as their adventures grow more and more dangerous, and eventually, exhausted and worn, theresa and xarus find each other in the den of a safehouse to talk. recognizing each otherās willingness to self-sacrifice, their conversation ends with them burning the contingency letters theyāve written, committing to life. these scenes come together because it shows how far they have come together, and the theresa and xarus relationship will always be a highlight of the wandering isles to witness. sometimes the players do all the best work for you, and itās so wonderful to sit back and watch <3
4. miles is missing
damien returns to the university he works at after an unprecedented amount time away to check on his office before he heads back out on another adventure with the party. while there he moves to put a sticky note (canonically a magical item in the wandering isles universe) on his rival colleagueās (and gay lover/roommate of 20 years) door only to find it entirely emptied without a trace. despite their bickering, miles and damien are very close, and miles would never pack up his things and go without telling damien.
this was a more subtle cliff-hanger for the session, but it was made so much fun as a dm because the players were excited and joking the whole session about milesā second appearance (and only since the very first session) so his sudden disappearance was made much more severe based on everyoneās anticipation of meeting and having a light-hearted interaction with him.
3. the infamous sex rave
sometimes things go very right as a dm and sometimes things spiral out of control when a pc mislabels a situation which becomes a running joke of the campaign. either way i love being stubborn in my defense ofĀ āit isnāt a sex rave!!ā whenever they bring it up (and immediately playing an npc who also calls it a sex rave). basically the players had a heist encounter in which they were hired to break a group of pirate prisonerās out of a secret underground information center (where magical artifacts were also being held and studied, and there was pertinent information stored for the party to take a swipe at). the group split and one subset of party members were forced to hide from guards on the outskirts of a large, gladiatorial style ring within the compound, in which prisoners were competitively battling in order to test the abilities of certain unknown artifacts for the entertainment of anonymous nobles in masquerade getup. based on the magical lighting effects, the strangely dressed noble onlookers, and the,,,, Fighting Noises being some of the only things the pcās perceived from the level of the auditorium they hid at, it was unfortunately misnomerāed theĀ āweird sex raveā and has only been referred to it as that ever since.
2. mother abelās goodbye
hmmm am i making players cry again? yeah maybe. mother abel was an elder cleric of nosa crossing, the starting city of the campaign. sheād lived through its settlement, destruction, rebuilding, and given her all not only to the city but also to the jilted creed (a secret society dedicated to disrupting geline, a large and dangerously powerful island-state which is one of the campaignās greatest evils). in the last use of her strength she took on a role as a conduit for a powerful plane shift ritual to transport the residents of the city to safety in the feywild as nosa crossing began to be overrun by potent wild magics in the prime material plane. as a low-level cleric, the spell took its toll on her, and as the party arrived in the feywild via a similar ritual to find the inhabitants, they were led to her side. theresa, a native of nosa crossing now reunited with her wife yodean, went to abelās side with yodean. as yodean sat on the foot of the bed, theresa kneeled as though praying to hold abelās hand cleric to cleric, confessing her gratitude but admitting that she cannot give as freely as mother abel did, that she and yodean deserve to live for themselves as much as they choose everyday to live for other people. with her final words in a soft, weak message, mother abel comforted theresa in her decision. the scene as a whole was so wonderfully sad, and the best dm moment of something so raw as telling aj, theresaās player, that while there was no way to confirm it in any real capacity, something in theresa felt that perhaps mother abel held out a little while longer to make sure she was safe one last time and make sure sheād truly gotten everyone home.
1. rosaās betrayal / lianās resurrection
enough of that sad shit letās get mean babey!! aslkjglfk i will be riding the high of this session for an eternity, but itās quite a lot to break down. rosa rucksaw is the captain of the crew the party rescues in the heist sequence, who eventually reveals herself to in fact be xarusā mom who fully left to assume a new identity and is Pretty Horrible as a person. at the safehouse, the party is asked by the people they were hired if they would be willing to take the crew to a longer term safehouse island, and the decision is left to xarus. not wanting to be like his mom, xarus agrees to endure a little more time with them in order to them this service out of convenience and kindness. a few hours from their destination, rosa finds xarus on the deck and honestly? kinda begins to admit some amount of guilt for all the shit she did,,,, literally seconds before she reveals that when her and her crew were caught by geline, she struck a deal in order to keep them alive, saying to her biological sonĀ āout on the cloudsea your crew is your family, and son, believe me, iād do anything for my familyā before her crew on the deck anchored the ship to an invisible gelinish war vessel and we snapped to roll20 for combat. the look of horror and betrayal on everyoneās face as her monologue hit those final lines, ugh and the fact that no one was super suspicious made it even better!! sometimes it Really Works, and this was one of those times!
flash forward in the battle, and an npc (itās miles, the gay lover from a few numbers ago) being held hostage by the gelinish vessel is killed, as he is resurrected by two party members (damien and theresa) damien reaches for his soul, as theresa, who multi-classed into divination wizard after a pc named lian died (with failed attempts from theresa and xarus to hold her back) feels another presence in the grey, misty beyond. lian died in session four, and when i said her name to reference jackās character everyone lost it mostly out of confusion before i began to narrate lian feeling restless in the afterlife, eventually reaching out and forming a celestial warlock pact with miles through his connection to damien and being called upon by her goddess sune as theresa reached out, offering lian the chance to go back. theresa returning to that moment with both her clerical and divinatory abilities, with the blessing of sune, lian emerging on the battlefield, now a vengeance paladin instead of life cleric, with a flaming sword and celestial wings at her back was such an incredible highlight to set up and run,, i just, <333 very proud of myself (and very thankful jack was on board for her coming back) for this moment
thank you so so much!! this was a long ramble, but i hope it was somewhat interesting to people not in the wandering isles <33
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