#but thats not really plural you is it
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i love seeing mutuals posts we’re like ships passing through the night . you know who you (plural) are
#i wish#english had a plural you#i mean theres yall#but thats not really plural you is it#like it is but it isnt#speaking of english i have been procrastinating studying german for days now i feel insane like i need to do it but I Dont Want To#ANYWAYS ABOUT THE POST#love my mutuals#who i have never had a conversation with#i see you and im like omg love that person#love is a strong word but like#its like hey i know who that is#like seeing a bird in the same place every day and youre like hey i know that guy#this is getting very parasocial i dont mean it that way#im just gonna assume you know what i mean#maybe you can#sense my brain waves through this post#telepathy#my post 🔮#laurence says things 🌌
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furina and foçalors from genshin!! and tartaglia from genshin too
Rating: somewhat plural !!
Rating: one quick look at his lore and you can spot the signs immediately, Guards, This Man is Plural as hell !! (bonus points; Whale! bc i think whales are neat :3)
#(not gonna say 100% that the hydro archon is plural bc focalors did literally Create Furina#and you cant Create a headmate#but they're close to plurality!!)#furina didnt really have a childhood to be traumatized in tho he* Is traumatized as hell its not quite system-coded#*transman furina i cannot let go of it im so sorry also look at focalors' dress thats flat as hell !! thats a man ! anyways#didosdd#tartaglia genshin impact#furina genshin impact#focalors genshin impact#complex dissociative disorder#did headmate#actually osdd#actually did#did system#did osdd#did community#osdd system#osddid#osdd#did#endos dni#plural rating
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To the person who made "the future is plural!".
yaYayay!
#name twin do you think that “the future is female” is a call for forcefemming?#that “the future is queer” is grooming children to be lgbtq?#that “the future is disabled” is wanting to saw off people's limbs?#because if thats your logic then you really need to rethink things#lol.exe#blackout poetry#pro endo#endo safe#endo friendly#anti rq#radqueers fuck off#the future is plural
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We are going to finally go and try to chart out / document our system / known parts for our old/current therapist and since we make a lot of organized sheets and stuff for fun I'm sharing a copy of a template for alter information ^^ Feel free to use / make a copy and use on your own and modify and all.
Its BASK + Extra stuff that we find relevant to our system
#alter: riku#actuallydid#dissociative identity disorder#did#osdd#did osdd#system#plural#actuallyosdd#cdd#endos and all can use this if this helps them cause honestly I dont really care#tulpas fuck off though#Still firm on that <3#willogenic or whatever you are good to use just people who use the term tulpa ^^#not anti or pro endo#just pro 'hey i made a resource thats not in limited quantity and would rather people use things that help them than promote discourse'#aka mysterious third thing
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Yearly reminder that even though we highly prefer medical terminology for our system, we are very pro-plurals doing whatever the fuck they want. Medical language always has made us specifically very comfortable and have no plans to stop using the terms that help us function, but we also have zero plans to apply these terms to anyone who doesn't want to use them or to tell any plural how they "should" be functioning. We unconditionally support all plurals of all origins and we don't support fakeclaiming or medicalizing those who don't want to be medicalized.
#pro endo#plural system#pluralgang#plurality#We've seen a lot of pro-endos say that seeing people use medical language makes them assume that theyre inherently an anti endo#and that makes me really sad because like. we're very pro endo as well as mixed origins.#but medical terminology makes us feel safe. it makes us feel in charge of how we take care of our system#and it makes it easier for us to know whats going on behind the scenes and to understand ourselves better#and if they dont do that for you thats fine. and if other terms do the same for you thats awesome ill use them!#but please try to be open minded. not everyone with a medical view of their own system medicalizes everyone. i promise.
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DO NOT get me wrong i fucking love jekyll & hyde its genuinely a really good story . but i Need you all to understand the things that it has done to the publics view on personality disorders and plurality disorders is fucking awful
#[ren]#i love that book!! its a really good book with an interesting story and characters!!! BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT BOOK HAS BROUGHT -#- DECADES OF DEMONIZATION AND FEARMONGERING INTO THE PUBLIC EYE ABOUT PERSONALITY/PLURALITY DISORDERS#this isnt to say you cant enjoy the book . but please i need you to Not look at it from a plurality / personality disorder pov . please.#im begging you. thats not what this book was about. im begging you please
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Fictive culture is being bullied off of sites/online spaces because you can’t control who you are/what your source is :(
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#thats really crummy! im sorry you have had to deal with that but felt -motions towards dsmp fictive-#actually plural#culture is#fictive#fictive culture#fictive culture is#endo safe#plural#plural culture#plural culture is
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noooo you can let me describe the doctors body trust me i totally wont be weird about it this time
#me explaining why the doctor is hot: well theyre old enough to be my messiah so jot that down#also a body thats died many times#me opening the powerpoint: so before we begin hands up how many of you have spent more time than you should thinking abt jesus' body#church was like and this is body of christ and me being 7 and autistic took that in every way they DIDNT mean#anyway sorry yaz not sure what exactly the sin is here but im pretty sure uhhh it is one#its usually the master doing this#but yaz is taking the masters place in this fic so#that tracks i guess#gonna have to figure out how to take the pronouns out of this too#also look at the third person/second person flipflopping#i do that kind of a lot but i realised in this paragraph maybe thats because..........there isnt a third person imperative uhh mode?#is that a mode we call that idk#there ISNT a third person imperative right? thats just second person?#i think so#but its interesting bc thats like the main way my narration flipflops#idk if thats like bad. bad writer habit or whatever#if it is i dont really care#it doesnt bother ME so#idk if it bothers anyone else#one time i had a fun paragraph in the doctors pov where it went from its standard 3rd to 2nd to 1st. 1st plural i think#and then Back to 3rd distance yourself from yourself dont get too close#anyway
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one time i tried that "mentally ask yourself if anyone else is in there" thing & i didn't get a Direct response but the song stuck in my head (which i Do Not control) would change and the new repeating lyric would function as a response to whatever question i asked. so that was kind of fucked up & i don't know if i'm supposed to do anything about it. it just kinda sounds ridiculous to say "there are entities in my head attempting to communicate with me via song lyrics"... i realize now i don't actually have a specific question i just wanted to tell someone about this sorry
THAT'S. HOW IT GOES SOMETIMES... yeah i have no idea what's up with that either brains are weird
#answered#evil words#+ while i get why it sounds ridiculous that IS like . entirely possible thats whats going on#to be clear im not saying this to say it is or isnt plurality specifically (thats up to you to figure out and decide)#im more trying to make the point that it sounding ridiculous doesnt make it less possible if that makes sense#plurality as a whole is weird and weird stuff like that happens all the time#+ tbh there isn't really anything you're inherently *supposed* to do? what to do is a case by case sorta deal if that makes sense#but if you want my advice i'd recommend seriously trying to talk even if it feels silly and going from there#wont neccessarily for sure get any useful information but hey. maybe you will.#it *is* also fine if u don't end up figuring out whats going on. sometimes u just simply *are*#shit can be hard to figure out especially with how much grey area there is. so you don't really *have* to figure it out#in hindsight i do think my og post lacked nuance in this regard which i do apologize for ^^;;#anyway i dunno whatevers going on and whatever happens i hope youre doing well and having a nice day. thumbs up#yknow i couldve put this shit in the actual post... tags are a game and i'm either winning or losing depending on your definition
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Zasr? Zadr? Zatr? Is it not enough to be a gay little bug
#this is a shitpost about how im tired of za*r dnis like. im sorry lol#in reality i dont really ship anyone crom the show bc they're all kinda self centered assholes doomed by the narrative and built to hate-#each other but like. im a fictive and i. dont care. i had the relationships i had with the beings i knew and thats all it is#me and dib had something. me and skooge had something. me and tak and (other) Zim are together in this life.#also its. made up. sillies. fictions. there is fighting! over sillies!#domt come at me ik theres real and good reasons to have dni for those ships and its fine like pls set ur boundaries#but literally im so exhausted this is my source like why is the fandom im from so aggro and mean.#“why is the mean aggro nihlist cartoon fandom so aggro mean and nihlistic” you know what im here for shiny colors and silly autistic bug bo#ys#zims stink#actually plural#invader zim#zadr#zatr#zasr#dni#discourse#? like. idk please be nice to me im so so so tired i literally dont even ship in this fandom i just exist#other fandoms tho. like bbc sherlock bro come at me ill kill you
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(Out of nowhere, you are approached by a familiar lightbulb-headed Cog.)
Ah, it's you, cat. Thinking you're oh-so-slick. Muttering and whispering under those raggedy whiskers of yours... Thinking I am unable to hear it all...
Well, you've simply underestimated my fantastic hearing. You probably want to know the reason why I'm here, taking a 'break' from my incredibly important scientific breakthroughs? It's quite simple, really!
(She gets close, and squints her eyes.)
I know what you are.
Farewell, now!
(She then leaves the way she came from.)
(Spam giggles immensely, covering her face... it always seems like she's giggling, isn't she? This lasts... at least thirty seconds. Longer than usual.)
And I know what I am too, Sparky! You broke through something, that's for sure. Really, broke through...
(She looks down, continuing to laugh nervously.)
You know, I find it odd you Havent tried to bulb blast me into the stratosphere by now. I mean knowing how you acted with Frostbite. Is there something peculiar about me that you perhaps can't quite track? Something about me that you... don't know what I am?
I know, I know, I'm talking to nobody again. But you were there when I had a moment today with the one the only Frostbite The Bravecog. You may be remaining. Lurking in the shadows. Knowing about these thoughts that I'm thinking.
(The giggling resumes, lasting far shorter this time.)
Your brother's a piece of fucking barp, by the way
(She braces for impact for a few seconds, wincing while smiling, before comically looking around to realize nobody's there. She sighs.)
Wow, okay maybe toony superhero show logic doesn't apply in this situation. Cool.
WAIT I JUST FUCKING REALIZED WHAT SHE MEANT but like. Dude if she meant that then what's the point I mean the whole ahh sellbot department barping knows unless you're Really low on the ladder. Heheh... maybe she did mean what I thought she meant.
Oh i'm so fucking screwed. What kind of bitch gets filament fever
#bright spark#<- for finding this again later. haha i called her sparky#the way she talks fucking tickles my brain so much im so . ohguohguohoghog SHE#SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG you see i was in the mindset that i would do this one little thing and then i would do my work which uh.#that leads to so so SO much procrastination. including on fun things! oh so fun things.#today was an event.#i also spent quite a bit of time ruminating i “would she really say that” is worse when shes literally you#to clarify. she is spam's aunt by like. building standards. not really in her found family. so its fucked up but as i said in discord this#is like. a “your mom's kinda hot” level crush. you know. also sorry i really wanted to say filament fever its been eating at me okay#nothing SERIOUS the way my f/os (and spam's f/os (plural now?? i guess?? if today was a canon event)) are#honestly mark still feels like the only real one with her to me but damn it. if spam's reflecting My Changes then she's Reflecting My Chang#spam in toontown unlike my other sonas is the most “its just you again” out of all of them and thats partially because her main#cog connection... is frostbite. they bounce off each other like we literally bounce off each other and damn it shes been so stagnant on her#own because of it. mark happened and she mirrored that because i kept fucking talking about him while we were in character and ideally#i should TRY to fix her. but also man because i'm not doing Serious lore stuff with her i dont. even know if i want to.#i kinda brushed it over the rug by saying that she relies on her constant entertainment so readily because she herself still doesnt feel#like she has a place outside of cogs only. sure she's in high roller backstage sure she's in allan's family now but shes not Doing anything#with herself the way that her friends are. mole's a ranger. frostbite cohosts. wishes... has chip. and something she doesn't have--#living and fully growing as a toon. rather than being haphazardly slapped into a world. and in some respects she's envious of frostbite#finding themselves so quickly because she distracts herself because she's still kinda struggling with it. despite everything. yes she lives#happy and carefree a lot of the time but she keeps buying those dumb phones because when she's truly alone... her mind starts to wander.#that's what mark is for. so that spam can dream of a world where she has a purpose. even if its fake and fragile and just nothing compared#to the great friends that she already has. where she feels like its worth it doing something when she doesn't have anyone. and in that#respect. with the goons ma allan parallels in sonboy the spam cathal parallels shine. seeking tv (and to a lesser extent games) as a#method of escapism. even when one's life is already pretty good. because there's nothing else worth doing without friends or family.#the internet isn't just cool. it gives her something to be when it seems like everyone is something but her. and maybe thats a lazy#excuse for why it seems like she doesnt HAVE anything to call her own but that but damn it i'm trying my best to twist it around.#spam has such a HISTORY yknow? even if it feels like i havent established her much.#spam is the hearts to frostbite's spades not just because they're the duo of all time but because spam's fake stupid love keeps her going#sorry i just started rambling in the tags of this post about spam it. happens. she loves her friends so much i need to reiterate that okay
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iceman from megaman powered up! i dont think the whole soldier/commander persona thing was ever intended to be read as a system but it really resonated w us before we knew about DID/OSDD ^^
!!
" In Mega Man Powered Up, Ice Man appears to have two personae, referring to himself as a soldier (in the first person) and as a commander (in the third person). He is often scared when others show up, prompting his commander persona to have him attack. "
Rating: there's a teeny tiny bit of plurality in this one !!
#mod 🦉#the reason im going the Tiny route is bc 1) this is a silly lil guy!! and 2) a lot of common media do this sort of thing#so we're not saying No its Not plural but we are saying you do have to kinda stretch a bit to really see it#but we're glad you resonated with him when you were younger!! thats really heartwarming#and also why i dont wanna say no bc if you related to him then surely theres some more plural-coding i might not be seeing#so he Is plural coded just not quite.. plural. if that makes sense?#didosdd#did#osdd#osdd system#endos dni#anti endo#plural#plurality#plural system#did system#actually dissociative#complex dissociative disorder#dissociative identity disorder#actually did#actually osdd#did osdd#osddid#plural rating
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imo ur sibling killing the dni listography is funny... was there another reason besides "i was embarassed by my 17 y/o self"
we thought it would be funny yeah! so glad to see people agree with that. but to quote my brother xe says "listing dni criteria is a bit silly and everyone should become best friends with the block button"
#thats really the best way to make sure you follow the right ppl! dont be afraid to block! its your space and u should be comfortable in it#but yes also. we just wanted it to be funny after its gone forever and all ^_^#idk why im talking in plural sorry i just feel like her manager or something rn lol
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If i had a better relationship with my mother/she wasn't highkey homophobic, I would ask her to translate @insecateur french fics so i can understand the tu/vous obsession better but I do not want her to know I read gay fanfic about French men fucking
#i get the gist of tu/vous#bc spanish/italian had something similar with formal you/casual you#but italian didnt have a proper one? it was just the 3rd person pronouns#so it was like loro for voui??? i sat here for like 5 minutes#5 minutes bc i forgot we you (plural)#anyway... like i get it? but also italian isnt AS formal as french#like we dont really... use the formal case a lot?#like we use it for *verbs* but not the pronouns?#so va instead vai#vanno instead of andate etc#but its always used with tu/voui (if thats even the right pronoun)#so... this is interesting to hear#i need to learn french honestly
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one of my friends from school (notably NOT my formal "school friend") yesterday called me "blu" in class.... and i cant really stop thinking about it. we met each other literally this year a few months ago and like we follow each other on instagram and artfight and all and hes cool and i call him by his chosen name (he is trans) but like... not even my school friend (the formal one) calls me blu. because thats not how we ROLL. im like HALF CLOSETED. and so really no one calls me blu irl unless its my friends and were hanging out in the real lifes. so... its really jarring and scary.... to have someone youve met for about 3 months call you by your internet name.
i couldnt even really process it in the moment. i was looking out the window (it was raining) and we were looking at some little birds. and he tried to get my attention and he said "blu" while holding out his phone to show me something and i turned cus thats me. why is this so confusing for me? so jarring? thats my name. thats what i say my name is online. he knows me online kind of. why was i shocked? hello?
ive always had kind of a weird relationship with my name.... i do want to change it but i feel like nothing matches my physical form as much as my given name you know? blu is the thing in my brain. its not ME in real life. how can i merge the two? how can i find a fitting name to merge the two? ive never felt like i truly look like how im supposed to look. ive never felt like im really "me." and this could be dissociation or it could be just general body dysmorphia but... i dont know... im too afraid of change to change something as crucial as my NAME. but i want to. because i dont like either of my names all that much. nothing feels like it fits and its driving me nuts........ i guess thats all i really wanted to talk about
#me#lamentings.........#i never understand how anyone finds their name. though i also realize that most people feel like they are themself#meanwhile i.... do not....#ive always had a struggle with my identity. i dont know if ill ever find it. maybe in college#its not even really like.... cus a lot of plural people have kind of a made-up visual representation of themself?#if youre an alter in a system you can usually tell oh im a cat and i ahve this color hair or im like big. you know?#even if its not a SET design like you can draw you can usually tell... general characteristics. you can tell how you feel like.#but i never... really got that.... im nothing at all. im just a color. even my cat thing isnt quite me#its like a hyper dramatized representation of me. its not really ME. its like fursonas#how could i possibly separate myself from the name “blu” if thats all i am? a color? if thats all ive based myself on since i was 10?#sorry this is kind of a vent. oh well
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I would not describe myself as plural or, dissociative in a, constant sense. But I do have moments where I can tell the boundaries between my body, the pilot of my body, and on occasion the 'thought havers' of my mind.
It's rare, but I've had a cold recently and it was quite distinctive with the mild fever disrupting the 'control'.
I am aware in those moments that the 'thinker' has changed from myself in the past, that who I was is no longer with me in a, 'making decisions' sense. I was sort of asking this question to my newest 'headmate' (who i have drawn but only posted in my latest art, its name is Morpho i think) and while I definitely don't have any kind of amnesia between identities or very much 'switching' , it was apparent that those memories are, stored away, accessed secondhand. And well... My memory is so shit, even when I feel completely single they are distant and almost impersonal, and very fragmented.
(air quotes isnt like a doubt thing I just want to clarify I do not believe I experience it, and so feel inadequate to use the terminology confidently)
I think this was something I was progressing towards in my childhood, having to act very differently around my father, my mom, siblings, friends, strangers.
But I think I was taken out of that environment at just the right time to 'reintegrate' myself.
However I had a lot of, in hindsight, dissociative episodes, in school, mostly due to, again in hindsight being very autistic and ADHD, and depressed from the age of, what, 14? And I would say that kept me from, for lack of a better phrase, healing entirely.
I am still compartmentalised, but there are no borders, just... doors that are usually locked. Sometimes theyre open but no one is there, sometimes theyre locked but I feel a presence, and on very rare occasion I see glimpses of them or, as with my fever state, can actually interact with and distinguish them from 'myself'.
I still feel silly saying I'm a traumatised person, since, well, I forgot pretty much all of the really bad stuff, and a lot of it I was of course shielded from.
(Domestic violence warning)
Instead of memories of... I think my dad threw an ashtray at my mom? Or threatened her with a knife?
My only memory of that event is infodumping to a police officer about how many pokemon I could name. It was not a scary experience (copaganda tho. And im white. And autistic so I never clocked that this was Not Normal. Police came to us / our neighbors allllll the time. Wild.)
But nonetheless I bear some form of trauma from it. I got tense approaching Dublin (Ireland) for the first few times because the red bricks remind me of England. It amuses me but it speaks to shallow but definitely present scars.
Is that the source of this? Was it my disocciating in school? I have nooo idea. Maybe it's just The 'Tism.
My uncle has schizophrenia so it's not impossible it's some sort of latent psychosis, but if anything I think I was more 'symptomatic' in my youth, but unable to recognise it, as I had never encountered genuine or nonmedicalised discussions of DID and plurality.
Should I, encourage this? I have no idea. This is definitely part of why I prefer it/they pronouns, it especially. That disconnect, while subtle usually, is and has been a big part of who 'I' am. But I still have my boy days, and girl days. I am just a sort of thing or creature primarily.
If you're still reading, uhhhh. Idk. Hi. If you knew me a long time ago I still care about you but I feel like I've never met you. Maybe I want to but it's hard. Idk who you are but I remember you.
Infinite Metamorphosis.
#drakepost#cw domestic violence#cw dissociation#?#Im doing much better recently at least#antidepressants arent really working but thats okay#i love you plural peoples and systems#having words and others experiences to bounce off of and compare to mine is very helpful#even if I dont think I am currently experiencing them fully or at all
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