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ive had enough of the people in this house
#vent#vent post#tw suicide#tw graphic#my parents never beat me they hardly ever yelled they gave us some punishments#my sister turned out semi normal except whatever shes got going on with mom#we used to fight eachother physically and thered be tears and bruises#we stopped doing that completely about a year ago#im turning eighteen after new years#the family house has been gradually shrinking overtime with me and my sister growing but still sharing one room#having three cats that come in and out of the house as they please#and now also a dog that makes lots of noise and wanders around as it wants too#i feel im not mentally strong enough#for this reality#or to keep living like this#feeling jam packed in a house with my grandparents#little to no privacy since childhood#parents that technically did nothing wrong#but something still went wrong#and things are wrong#and i really want to leave this place and go live on my own#away from all of them#i feel insane#i feel i am Going insane#and i will hurt either myself or someone in this house#i have a deep dark desire to cause harm that i haven't satiated with anything#i wish i had a billion dollars from a lottery so i could run away to my new little apartment in the middle of the city with a friend or 2#and be happy#by not having to be around family that I've had enough of#venting
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I wish we could have met in some other way.
Lawlight Week Day 2: Soulmates
If you saw me repost and re-edit this several times uh No you didn't </3
Still frames/Individual gifs:
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If you know what every frame is from you get a free cookie. by the way
#death note#dn#light yagami#l lawliet#lawlight#oh god here we go#death note jdrama#death note 2015#death note 2006#death note musical#lctw#l change the world#dntm#lawlightweek2024#my art#collapses i am NEVER putting this much effort in one piece ever again /hj this was the Only one i had mostly prepared in advance#ironically the most painstaking part about making this entire thing was converting the images into an animated file#that wasn't either horrifically compressed or just. wouldn't loop. why do gifs have to look so BAD it's so inconvenient#and THEN i realized I had to forcibly Stitch the two animations together so they would actually be synced and it wouldn't look dumb#and the end result is STILL so compressed. because Tumblr. uhhh just don't click on it it'll look so scuffed LOL. anyways#this is what i get for watching Every Adaptation of Death Note. i am a death note multiverse truther#usually i'd have something clever to say in the tags but. this drained the life out of me just uh.#yeah. they're doomed in every universe. this is the only way they could've met. they are doomed by their own natures and the#circumstances that surround them. there is no universe where light tries to prevent L's death. and even in the cases where L Doesn't die#there is no universe where L can save light. there is no universe where he can truly “catch” Kira and make him see where he went wrong#(<- if you read LCTW you know. :) )#in every universe and adaptation L will call Light his first friend. in some universes they'll take that notion more seriously than others#no matter what one of them will die due to the other. its the only constant. it's the only way it can ever be. they are the others downfall
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V on a motorbike vroom vroom
#art#fanart#murder drones#md#murder drones fanart#murder drones v#md fanart#md v#FINALLY did some normal fanart of my fav#i lost motivation midway drawing it#and i had a diff idea at the start#but something went wrong#i have no idea how to draw bikes#could've done better but i'll live#still kinda like it
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#kingdom hearts dream drop distance#khddd#sora#riku#nightmare's end#mirage split#my gif#i was going to write up a whole thing in the tags about my thoughts on this keyblade#but i just know it'll be an incoherent essay because i can't properly articulate my thoughts#the x-blade must be forged through a clash of light and darkness#but i find it so highly significant that sora and riku can create their own keyblade which is so unheard of#this keyblade isn't created with a clash but rather through harmony and balance#not with conflict but with understanding and connection and love#and i always felt as though that's how the x-blade SHOULD be forged. that master xehanort went about it all wrong#because balance and connections are such important themes in these games#it has two handles and looks so regal when combined. all of the shapes feel reminiscent of the x-blade too#it shines so brilliantly with both sora and riku's symbols. the heart and crown which is the iconic logo for the entire series#also the way stained glass is always used to represent hearts. it's so significant!#and yeah the paupu fruit keychain is its own thing to unpack#okay so i ended up writing something anyway but there's still so much more#i just really hope we get to see more of this in future games because it would be shocking if it was nothing more than a cool combo attack
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can i ask for larry and kabu.... is it allowed......... if not i can ask for something else lol
Day 2 - Warm feelings
#My art#Requestober#Pokemon#Larry#Kabu#Firebland#There's so many ship names but that one's probably my favourite hehe - right to the heart of them!#Silverstreakshipping#Yes of course* you can ♪#*That's what the trade rule is there for! Hehe ♫#Obviously I had to read their fic - for research purposes of course <3 Hehehe ♪#They are cute! This is known haha#Had to have Larry with his signature Komala hug - I forgot while drawing but I'm gonna pretend it was on purpose lol#Give me a man in a suit and I'll give him a holdable waist that's just the rules around here#Although Kabu's not going for his waist is he hehehe#So - why Is Kabu's design Like That lol#Like don't get me wrong he's very cute at his base! But his clothes are so busy lol#So much so that for a bit I thought his fire-sleeves were hiragana pft - looks like らく from certain angles haha#So I opted to hide as much of him behind Larry as possible - didn't do all That much but it's something lol#But then it went too far! I wanted Larry's arm to be lower but the posing didn't work out so now you can't see his face properly! D:#He had a smirk in my sketch! Ah! Well you can still see it in his eyes but wahh cute smile#I also like how his smile line is generally portrayed on the one side lol - a true smirk line! Silly#I really don't draw crow's feet often enough they're so pretty#I had fun finagling Kabu's foot to the outside of Larry's as well - fully boxing him in in return? Staggered feet between? You decide :3
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georgie gives ekky some privacy — SJS vs UTA — 01.10.25
#sharks lb#hockey#sharks#san jose sharks#alexandar georgiev#william eklund#he is Truly Shielded from the cameras by the tender bulk of a goalie#perhaps the safest space a guy can be to get something shoved up a nostril to stem the blood pouring out of it#ETA I HAD THE WRONG GOALIE AT FIRST 😭#they all so kindly label themselves via their numbers on their masks#& still my brain just went 'goalie on the bench. must be the guy who wasn't in net' fully forgetting THAT THE NET WAS EMPTY#their eyes don't even look similar i just didn't clock it 😔#z:edit
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i made a strawberry kitty using @daftpatience 's pattern here!! this is the first time I've followed a pattern, and it didn't turn out super wonky! ಥ‿ಥ slowly I will gain more confidence in my ability to use a sewing machine...
#strawberry#fiber arts#cat art#sewing#i clipped every curve even ones that weren't in the pattern and the side neck seam is still quite pinchy ;_;#but i went through the reblogs and i didnt see anyone else with this issue so i mustve done something wrong#mine
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If you were thinking of buying the livestream ticket for Mamma Mia But Different, this is your sign!
This duet alone 😍 the harmonies were incredible.
(Full gif set)
#I'm literally at work and cannot concentrate because of this#Angela's voice went up so high 😯#angela giarratana#mariah rose faith casillas#smosh#starkid#team starkid#mamma mia but different#i still have to do the abbalachia one but this might have to be made first#too many pending projects 😭#smgifs#hfgifs#miscanggifs#something is wrong with the other post
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i meant to make some big well-written post abt it but unfortunately my brain was otherwise occupied experiencing The Horrors so instead, have some wordvomit
this past monday marked twenty years since i went on a field trip to the library and ran my hand along a bookshelf in the children's fiction section and found a book called So You Want To Be A Wizard* and brought it home and read it cover to cover in like. a day. and i couldn't even begin to explain how that day has shaped my life but i do just wanna acknowledge it and say that i'm so glad my friend let me borrow her library card (cause i didn't have my own yet) so i could bring the book home and i'm so glad my mum special ordered the rest of the series from the local independent bookstore almost immediately after i finished it and i'm so glad i discovered the forums and i'm so glad i found so many cousins on tumblr—including my best friend and platonic soulmate @astraldepths—and i'm so glad i got to help plan and execute crossingscon (twice!!) and that i got to meet so many of you in person—INCLUDING DD HERSELF—and i'm just. so glad i discovered this series
i have like twelve copies of SYW but i think my favourite is the twentieth anniversary edition (which is now, itself, twenty years old—wild), because it contains both the short story Uptown Local, which i adore, and an afterword by DD, which i have read entirely too many times. anyway, i wanna share a quote from that afterword, bc it seems fitting:
Wizardry, too, changes with the times, because its practitioners do...and indeed it must change, to keep up with the Lone Power, Itself never averse to using new means to Its old end. Even the Wizard's Oath will seem to change from time to time, altering its appearance according to species, age, cast of mind, and (sometimes) simply according to where you're standing, in time and space, when you examine it. But beyond that, as the series continues, I can promise that some things will always stay the same—the knowledge of a partner's dependable friendship; a shared go-for-broke determination to get it right when the Universe is watching; and the glad adrenaline rush caused by the sudden incursion of the unexpected...as when you run your hand down a row of books on a library shelf and one of them catches your finger.
so yeah. in lieu of a more coherent post abt it, i just wanna say. thank you @dduane. for everything 💚
#this has been an original post#personal spewage#young wizards#dying rirhait noise#*technically i discovered High Wizardry first and read the first page and was like ''i feel like i'm missing something'' lol#then i noticed it was the third book in a series so i went looking for the first#but anyway#my point still stands#also if you saw the version of this post where i tagged the wrong diane duane: no you didn't
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oh yeah destiny is a multiplayer game
#i still can only lfg about things i did before or i know i won't screw up#still feels bad when there's one small thing went wrong and the whole team instantly quit#should find some time to actually try solo nezarec or something#d2checkpoint my savior#getting all dark age set without beating warlord's ruin legit#destiny 2#destiny hunter#destiny 2 art#my art#ramble#(i mean it is tbh)
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i’m gonna say it.
i’m gonna say it…
okay…
………
tao xu saying ‘friends group’ to me is just morally wrong. it’s FRIEND group. WHY DOES HE SAY FRIENDS GROUP
#if this is an english thing i will get violent#as a scottish person know that it is friend group because i say so#like ok we say some things weird sure BUT FRIENDS GROUP IS JUST WRONG!!!!#WHY IS IT A PLURAL IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WORD#when he said it me and my friend literally both at the same time went ‘FRIENDS group????’#like suddenly we weren’t devastated over his film we were too caught up on Friends group#this is something i really care about ok#im kidding i swear im not being entirely serious#though i do still think it is weird. sorry#osemanverse#alice oseman#heartstopper#tao xu#hstv#heartstopper season 3#heartstopper s3#heartstopper tao xu#will gao
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#baldurs gate 3#bg3#shadowheart#bg3 spoilers#my gifs#i tried messing with the colors for like two hours and still just went with the original capture....#something is wrong with me#ok off to play oxenfree 🏃
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chat i think im gonna be sick
(Powers of X #6)
#xmen#xmen comics#powers of x#charles xavier#snap scans#snap chats#moira stronger than me like ik why we here we're gonna die if not and so that is why she is stronger than me she is committing#i woulda kissed him in this moment too tho she and i are family on that front im afraid i do find him very cute#also. SIDE TANGENT. i loved the art before this of charles slowly processing the horrors of moiras mind ...#EXCELLENT art i must eat it at once#the most devious part of this is after i finished reading i went to go to my brother to talk about What I Read#and the second i pulled up like 'his sad eyes Brother im gonna be sick' he immediately quoted this page I HATE IT HERE#thats why they had to put that dome over charles' eyes so no one could look at his sad eyes anymore#this is in fact something i love and always love seeing but it still hurts i will not LIIIEEE#cant wait to read bout how this all goes horribly wrong ....#while my bro and i were talkin we were talkin bout other in-between stories an i wanna check those out at some point ...#maybe ill check my comic shop sometime in the future idk. for now im gonna throw up !!!!!!!!!!#i will simply spend tomorrow watching the rest of 92 im almost done with it. relatively speaking i will feel healed then probably#i got like two seasons left which is basically the same length as season 3 and then its onto 97#thats just one season for now so ... should finish that quick ..#ok bye i have Being Sick to be
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compiled whatever this is (and I run out of tag space)
meh HoT gifs (3/?)
#alek gifs#ninjago#ninjago krux#ninjago acronix#hands of time#time twins#alternate title to this series is : stuff i noticed after watching this season 10 whole times#okay actually thats a lie. i realized this the 3rd time around#i think of acronix and how he barely makes any decisions for himself and i go crazy#ppl equate that with him feeling forced to do stuff.. uh hes always been a follower guys!!#cue him calling wu “master wu” even after the twins betrayal. him liking machia bc shes “mean” and bossy#he has no issue with following orders lol. prepare for a long acronix rant one day#contexts -> gif 1 barely counts i just wanted to include him looking at krux. he does this a lot during that fight#gif 2 is before they kill blunck and raggmunk (idk how to spell their names still ... sorry)#gif 3 is before they were going to kill wu in the golden hour legacy short. which is canon !!#gif 4 is before they sent themselves into the temporal vortex#that one post that was like “are we still doing revenge? yeah? cool” bc thats basically acronix#there is something fundamentally wrong with these two's brains but idk how to describe it#krux who literally lost his mind after losing his brother to the point he adopted an entire identity#“he just needed to go undercover!!” counter point as soon as acronix came back he was unable to pretend to be saunders. he acted super weird#like when kai was in the museum he couldnt pretend to be this person he wasnt. acronix was back !!! so was he. krux was 100% going to kill#the smith sibs if maya and ray didnt comply. also.. canonly they knew him when they worked as teachers back in s3. he watched them grow up#and pretended all was well meanwhile their parents were being forced to work and slave away to build the iron doom. he is not normal#then you have acronix who thrives off of violence and is described as throwing himself into battle like a blunt object. has no regard#for himself as a person and just takes (almost) everything his brother says as gospel. s7 couldve done smthn really cool with how#the only thing the twins ever really disagreed on was technology. also ive went on a semirant about how krux's hatred for tech was misplaced#hatred for losing acronix. wanted to travel to the pre modern era? okay well whyd he pick 40 years ago specifically. also NOTE that they#went back after their past selves had lost. they wouldve faired better if they went and helped their past selves. also the reversal blade#had already fallen so when the twins went back in time there was two kruxes. he literally went back to when he had been all alone for the#for the first time. he went back to when his life was ruined and his brother was gone!! but he had nix with him this time . ughdhf
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wanted to say I appreciate your nuanced takes on MW and especially Curly. i don't get the claim that the fandom is full of Curly apologists when majority (esp yt and tiktok) say he's worse than Jimmy. Yes there's commentary about bro culture defending people, he def messed up in trying to placate Jimmy (tbh "we'll fix this" sounded more like trying to keep someone prone to outbursts like Jim calm and not hurt Anya/himself) but I don't think he did nothing to help Anya, since she continued to confide in him and he had less than a week to resolve it before the crash (I also don't get everyone saying he knew for ages when it seems like Anya told him that same week). I get Jimmy's a pos but saying stuff like Curly should've known he'd crash the ship or that Jim had a criminal record he ignored, reducing them to obviously horrible villain and willfully ignorant sidekick feels like a disservice to the game. If your best friend turned out to be horrible, what would you do in a confined space in the span of a few days to respond? I'd say some of the horror comes from trying to do good but ultimately failing, Curly's state after the crash is meant to be tragic horror not revenge/punishment
Thank you and this is what I want to get across.
A lot of information we have to supplement when it comes to how long things have been happening on this current ship. I think people try to add on to the horror and negligence by making things more obvious so it can feel like it was easier to avoid when, true to life, its not. Jimmy clearly didn't deserve or appreciate what Curly did for him in getting him the job, but do you think if Jimmy was that big of a menace on Earth he would've given him a position where he could have that level of power over people's lives? There's something in the fact he specifically chose to pick a position so close to himself where he could watch Jimmy.
I hate the bro code argument because that is a whole can of worms people really don't get. That sort of mentality is born from the general respect and preference of male matter over female ones. Curly is clearly not that guy, he is absent minded about the issue and inadvertently dismissive but he clearly believes Anya, he just can't understand what she's going through. It's an onslaught of information that no one really reacts right to. Additonally, the entire discussion of her assualt plays to heavy into the idea that there is fault outside of the perpertratior when it comes to SA. It's too close if she only did this or if Curly had protected her better but the fact of the matter is Jimmy did what he did. He did it before any of the conversations with Anya about it and it's why her behavior seemed to change so drastically in those last two days.
He has other conflicting thought and while his role as a Captain should've taken over, people act like it's not a very human thing to have such a toxic presence cloud your judgement. It is never easy to separate friend from coworker once that connection is formed, you want to help them, especially if they were friend first and for a long while like in this case. It's not right, but people act like it would be easy when the game clearly points out that no choice is easy to make, especially when you have to make it for more than one person. You have the weigh the consequences, look at all the options and make a plan. People can headcanon and decide how long things where happening, but if we look at what we were presented through the characters eyes, the only person given time to do that was Jimmy.
He waited two months after the crash to appoint himself Captain. Every time a problem was brought up he immediately took action and refused to sit on it and find a better solution. I think it's important to look at the warped way Jimmy takes initiative where Curly didn't as it works as a good contrast of why you don't just run in to "fix" things. The quickest and easiest option may not be the safest or most beneficial. I think some thoughts on the game suffer from the black and white thinking the game doesn't operate on along with us being voyeurs. We see what exactly led to what but the characters don't. They don't have the hindsight and foresight we do and even ours is scrambled by the non-linear story telling.
Like it's hard to talk abuou those grey zones without sounding like an apologist because you're explaining why taking responsibility isn't easy. It's not and it's weird to act like it would be in a scenerio that led up to the events of the game knowing what we know. We see all these characters in such isolated moments with various things before, in between, after and even during we aren't privy too. The idea that Jimmy is worse than Curly heavily banks on the words Jimmy was saying to Jimmy before he crashed the ship. That whatever happened on the ship was his responsibility to bare, which is true due to his position. But, are they not still not responsible for taking the actions Curly then must bare?
Like i feel like people think that these are situation that become easier with age or when you are in a postion of authority and they aren't. You don't lose your biases or gain some sudden knowledge that makes it easier. It just becomes more tiring as you keep dealing with it. I would be first in line to say Curly fucked up and should've done more but the idea he knew how bad it could get or he really saw the worst in the people around him and ignored it pretty much ignores a huge aspect of his character and the game.
#i do believe Anya was a victum to Jimmy more than once before the crash but the game plays wit the sort of fear of waiting and stagnation#i believe the reason she decided to tell him was becasuse she finally broke down and tested to see if she was pregnant after one too many#signs and its why she went to hide the gun because she knew now that there was proof of what Jimmy did and was he would do anything to#cover it up and while she also didn't want the baby there was no sure fire way to safely induce a miscarriage or abortion cause shes smart#enough to know that hence her reading the illusion of choice and taking measures to protect herself#but in the hypothetical it was a one time occurence I think Jimmy would act like one single mistake shouldn't define him and Anya thinks#that if she did something sooner or said something sooner than she or Curly could've stopped all of it but that the hard thing taking actio#its so hard to be preventative to a person like they also have the autonomy to do things and no one on the ship is okay with actively takin#that away outside of Jimmy that its just a delicate issue and people act like it was a conscious choice not to help when he just helped#wrong he did wrong by not immediately punishing Jimmy but at the same time did he even fully get it yet? Jimmy immediately got into his hea#after like the sound design right before he confront him is telling like every track sort of gives you the feeling of the characters where#we cant see their thoughts because again the only two characters pov we get are Jimmy's and Curly's and even then we only get Curly's thru#the responsibilites he has to take like he is always tasked with something because thats his role but we rarely see him do something off hi#own volition cause hes a metaphorical cog in many of the machines the games comments on but he's not actively pulling a switch#also i think people latch on to the we can both be heros things too much when analyzing Curly because Curly very much is not happy being th#leader and current “hero” of the Tulpar he just wants out in a way that doesn't hurt and while he is still responsible for not doing more#the idea he could've easily nipped this in the butt acts like Jimmy was not a beast of his own and that he made Jimmy into the person he wa#vs the fact that Jimmy is a person on his own right that makes these choices others are forced to take responsibility for when he simply c#couldve not done evil shit like at the end of the day Curly is not perfect but not nearly or remotely as bad as Jimmy because for that hed#have to not care hed have to not have tried hed have to not try to take responsibility and he did just not in the right way but thats#subjective to the person and you can only realize you did fuck up after the results are before you and its tragic like this game is a#a tragedy no matter how you try and spin it. There's lessosn to be learnt but at the end of the day it telling the worst moments of peoples#lives and the certain inevitabilities that come with it#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse anya#anya mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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when you watch promising young woman for the first time and see the ending, and as a woman your BRAIN SCREAMS, 'why do woman have to die to get justice?????'
and then you take deep breaths and realise.... that's the point...that women HAVE to die get justice. they won't believe you until you are fucking dead in a ditch and they have no choice but to believe you.
the ending this cold harsh reminder that oh, you thought this was a feminist revenge fantasy, where everything will work out.
well, here's the cold harsh truth. that the man you might love will be complicit in your worst nightmare. and he will show no remorse unless his career is at stake.
that the men will KILL you and burn your body and enjoy their weddings and escape because they CAN. because the world is built to protect them.
you thought this movie will find escapism here, that oh I Can Win.
well, no. no you can't. they won't let you.
#promising young woman#i still have alot of weird complaints about how she went about the women involved#it's not wrong completely but it is a nuanced thing#something to say that the only one who shows regret is a man??#while the woman don't#hmmm#also bo Burnham CAN GET IT#always been on his hype train
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