#but I am saying that I would pay someone for that service. to prove that it exists. YOU KNOW? DO YOU KNOW.

[musicrunsthroughmysoul]

As I was listening to 'Til Tuesday (if you could not tell) on my way to work and on my walk home today, I realized that Aimee Mann's approach to her songwriting (lyric writing) in 'Til Tuesday is very much of a corrective nature. It really feels to me like she writes (at least in 'Til Tuesday; I've heard all of their studio albums) from men's perspectives in a lot of cases to/about women as a way to correct how misogynistic men have written about women in songs forever. And like...when I listen to "Angels Never Fall" off of Welcome Home (1986) especially, it's an idea to think of her songwriting as queer (I want to, tbh), but at the same time, I really just hear a straight woman writing about how she wants/would want to be treated and considered by men - it's like her songwriting (in those instances) are for/to say that women don't have to be perfect to be respected, as people and as love interests. And that's one reason I love her songwriting, and 'Til Tuesday's work (besides that they're just excellent as a band in general - THIS IS NOT JUST THE AIMEE SHOW, THANK YOU), so much.

[threepandas]

Bad End: We Are

Senatus was a ecumenopolis. The "shining jewel" (yeah, right) of the Galactic Core. Please. Like? Maybe it was! If you were RICH AS FUCK. I don't know. I'VE never seen the towers. The heights. Most people haven't. Street level? Is about FIVE HUNDRED FLOORS DOWN. And the UNDERGROUND? Speak not of it.

The Underground GROWS.

What was street level today, may not be tomorrow. Levels buried under "progress" as the rich grow ever higher. The Tox levels ever worse. Air quality dropping. Why fix the peasant's poverty and despair, when you can buy a Sky garden you'll never use? And yes, I AM bitter as a Buirian fish ration. Just as salty too. Taste the SEA, motherfuckers.

Rent? Who can AFFORD rent!? Who can afford ANYTHING?!

It's some BULLSHIT.

But me? I remembered. A life. Before this one. Before the millennium of slow, drip drip drip erosion of duty and dues. Back when people still REMEMBERED what they were OWED. And when folks in power failed to pay up? Ffffuck um. Take it. Our house now, motherfuckers. Diplomacy was a courtesy not a weakness.

....I make people nervous, honestly.

Probably why I keep getting fired. That and my constantly reporting people to regulatory boards. Maybe don't break the LAW if you don't want to get in trouble you SHITS. Fuck you! Yes, I stole your fancy office chair. PROVE IT. You don't know how the security system works!

Where was I? Ah, right. Rent.

Fuck Rent.

Thing is? What! Is a biodome? If not an enclosed system, regulated by machines, for optimal habitability? And! What? Is an Deep Underground Level? Long forgotten? Abandoned, if you will~, if not? A complete enclosed environment? Does someone OWN them? Yes. Technically. But are they MAINTAINING them? CHECKING on them? Nope!

Common knowledge, after all, says that EVERYTHING down their is "beyond salvaging"!

Free Real Estate~☆

I just need some supplies. Which? Cheaper in the long run then RENT. Especially if ya' salvage um. Maybe steal some tool sets from your shitty, shitty Mechanics job, because your boss refuses to pay you. Who can say? Not me! I just FOUND these tools! Like maaaagic~

And really, one man's junk? Another man's treasure. I pay more then the trash company. Hit up the right cleaning companies? And? Oops. They've "lost" some of those SUPER broken righ folks "junk" that? At best? Just needed a few wires replaced, resecured. Maybe a new part. Or were, you know, not the latest and greatest anymore.

Shove it all in a storage locker? Sell the refurb'd shit I don't need? Sleep in a glorified shoebox? And?? Bam. Operation "fuck ya'll, i'ma moleman" is a go. It takes FOREVER to find the right WILDLY out of date (and long abandoned) lift, but I find it! Hidden away in a service area in some crumbling, forgotten corner of what once was a rail station.

Gonna have to fix THAT up too. Later, though. First? The lift. The wires are brittle and the lift's pully system is half rusted, frozen, or otherwise broken. Luckily, the car itself is fine. It... takes a bit of research. Not going to lie. It's far from my specialty. I even call in a professional to go over my work.

They catch a few things. Not immediate concerns, but would have been fatal in the long run. Money well spent. For my hobby, of course. Fixing up old bits of the city. Which is a weird but not impossible hobby to have.

Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies, my dude.

First thing down? Lights, melter, and duraplast sheets. Toolkit too, for obvious reasons. Same with my full body hazard suit. I go DEEP. Like... no longer can hear the city, deep. 'Bout halfway point. Takes nearly thirty minutes. And while not a fast lift? Holy SHIT, man.

The floor I step out into is... bad.

Dead in a way that's hard to explain. There's pressure against my suit. Centuries of heavy gasses slowly working their way down. Swirling in the silence. The dust and impossible dark. My headlight feels almost... sacrilegious. Dangerous. Like I'm waving a flashlight around some ancient burial ground, filled with the not so restful dead.

I had heard... that they? Just... just LEFT droids down here. That there were levels upon levels of dangerously feral machines. Slowly rotting away in the darkness. Probably rightfully angry, that they had been built to serve, to do duties, which they HAD done... only to be consigned to hell on earth for the sake of CONVENIENCE.

I'd be mad too. Fucking LIVID. Would remember and hate, never let it go.

This was no place of honor, it was a tomb.

Still, I got too work. Set up a light by the lift and started measuring out the original air box. The air cleaners could only handle so much. And THIS? This was worse then expected. So it'd have to be smaller then originally planned. Fair enough. I could work with that.

I outlined the space in lights. All the better to make it easier to put things up. Then got the folded later and started securing the duraplast. First step, get it up. THEN melt it to the metal. Get a good seal. It took... a while. Was slow, steady, sweaty work.

The filters couldn't run until they had a an enclosed space TO run in. They'd just blow out, trying to filter the whole level's toxic atmosphere. I kept an eye on my air supply. Not great, not terrible. The readings though? Horrific. I had no idea what I was gonna DO with the filters when they needed changing. These kind of chemicals would set off all SORTS of alarms.

But? No use, rushing things. That was a great way to get a fatal leak somewhere. No. Slow and steady. Even though, third of the way through, I did have to head back up. I needed to refill my air. Eat. Drink. Maybe de-stink a little, from being in that suit all day. Possibly nap near the lift.

ALSO? Update my shopping list to include some heavy duty neutralizers.

Just filters wasn't gonna be enough. I was gonna have to hose down everything INSIDE my new air-box, then scrub it HARD. How fun. Well, it's not like anyone was making me do this. It was MY mad idea, after all.

So? I refuel, get bright eyed and fuckin' perky, and go back down to face the beast.

Honestly I should have brought a telebook or something. Well, audio book. But that's not what they call um these days, so I try to stick to the lingo. I sound less like a deeply insane antique. Confuse less people. Joys of basic communication and all that.

Part of me? Wishes I had been born closer to "The Plot". Creation's specialist, most favored, Blorbos. But? The common SENSE in me? Routinely laughs hysterically as it waves fifteen different restraining orders and a crucifix. Not even religious. Yet here we are, shouting "BEGONE! Sataaaaan!" in HD, on the inside of my head. Not sure it helps.

See... it's the fucking DRAMA~☆™

The shear, unmitigated, high octane, Otome Game DRAMA.

I would fuckin DIE or, possibly and, kill somebody. The endless string of selfish, selfish, poor life choices? Driving by luuuuuuv~♡? Give me your spleen. Gonna beat somebody unconscious with their own SPINE. I RAGE. Lack of communication? No one just picking up a fucking PHONE? God forbid ANYONE tell their families their not DEAD IN A DITCH SOMEWHERE!

No. No just inconvenience EVERYBODY and RUIN LIVES. It's okay! You're in LOVE!

That makes EVERYTHING BETTER.

I would inevitably launch them all out an airlock. Spend the rest of my life in jail. They AREN'T WORTH IT. I may have LOVED this game in my teens? But I did not die a teenager.

Now? Now the little shit just aggravate me. They are baby faced pretty boys who presume WAY too much. Arrogant and entitled. Boys playing at being men, thinking their little love stories are the only things that matter. Their feelings are the only thing in the universe that holds any weight.

Unsurprising, really.

Seeing as how their little love story is set mostly in The Towers.

A rich, pampered, pretty little backdrop where nothing of weight is real. No one starves and no crimes are ever committed. Everything shines. Power pools thick like honey. Nothing but sci-fi prince's and alien dukes, a dewey eyed Protagonist sheltered and naive.

Her oh so shocking misadventure to the mid-levels. How SCARY! Downtown! Poor people! Not even the destitute. Just? The EXSISTANCE of dirt and noise, beyond her ivory towers. Thank goodness she is saved by a handsome, rougish bad boy. Who shows her the "real world" of a carnival and a noodle shop.

I finish securing the last duraplast sheet to the ceiling, walls, supports, and along the floors. The "entryway" to the rest of the level is set up. A click together shed I've made air tight. Gonna have to get a air lock system for it. Won't hold forever, with those materials, but should work for now. Combine it with a decontamination system, and I should, in theory, be able to safely enter and leave the rest of the level in a hazard suit.

Moment of truth time. I click on the first of the atmo-filters. It heaves under the strain. The sound getting less aggrieved with each one I flick on. Their screen are already in the red, flashing warnings that I should vacate the area. That the air is dangerously unbreathable. I'm probably gonna need to replace the filters in them in days instead of years. It'll be worth it.

Heading back up, I let them run. It'll take a few days. Besides, I need those neutralizers.

I, of course, DO find um. Just in time to watch Poor Guy (middle class, at worst) Love Interest become a wanted man. They use the BIG screens to announce it. Gee, it's almost like having your only daughter, who is highly sheltered, NOT show up at the designated pick up site? Instead be witnessed in the handsy company of a scoundrel? Which is WILDLY unlike her? Might lead a protective father to some wrong conclusions.

If ONLY someone had CALLED him! To TELL him "Daddy, my first shuttle was broken and I think I got on the wrong back up shuttle! I don't know where I am!" Then this would just be an unfortunate meet cute with the boy he doesn't think is good enough for her. Not, you know... A Kidnapping.

The Chem seller looks just as baffled and annoyed as I do. Apparently knows the guy's uncle's second wife's first husband. No shit? How's he like? Happier, huh. Whole family is like that? Yikes. Glad he got the kids, I guess. Good for him.

We watch as it turns into a high speed chance that absolutely didn't need to happen.

Thank FUCK it's not us.

I spend the next few days deliberately and obstinately ignoring the Dramatic Bullshit that has taken over the news cycle. Fights on rail cars? Don't see it? Weddings that are, then aren't, then ARE happening? Oh look, missed a spot in my scrubbing. Someone fucking tearfully monologing about love as they nearly CRASH A SHIP into downtown, killing hundreds of thousands? Oh that creaking noise is just my teeth, ignore that, I grit my teeth a lot for NO PARTICULAR REASON.

This Is Fine.

I am TOTALLY CALM.

But hey! I can FINALLY empty my storage unit out! Air box? Get! Wooooo! Size of a tiny apartment and everything! As long as I keep working on it? I'll be able to reclaim the level in chunks.

It's like moving in day! But BETTER! Because... because I did this. Me. Is it still creepy down here? Yeah, very. But I can FIX that. I am standing, here, in my new air box "apartment", with NO hazard suit on. And... and it's SAFE. Because of the work I DID.

I kinda want to cry about it, you know?

So many options! Do I put my bed here? There?! Oooh, I could put the folding table HERE and make sort of a dining area? Maybe use these folding screens as a double "wall" slash headboard stand in? I should get plants. Fake ones? No. Real ones. I could get solar lights. It would be good for me too. Oh! Where should I put the cook top?

I admit it. I fuss. Whole day, gleefully wasted. Arranging then rearranging. Getting everything just right. Finding ways to hang my fairy lights. Looking up decor magazines. I have so much ROOM now. A whole level to plan for, ultimately. It... it feels kinda like hope. The first thing that isn't frustration and rage, I've felt in a long, long time.

Going to sleep? I'm happy.

Next day, I head to the BIG archives. The ones attached to the fancy Towers Library. Is it costly to get in? Yeah. But I've saved up enough questions and research topics for the trip to be worth it. I ignore the started glances I get (gasp! Is that a POOR?!) and head straight for the helper droids. Only decent folks in the building, really.

Brought my pad and everything. So it's only a matter of being lead to the right terminals, to download the information I need. Chatting with the research droid the Library had, they offered to do it for me. Bring me a fascinating new research paper on some sort of telepathic moss that had recently been discovered. Not gonna lie... that DID sound fascinating.

I asked if they could put other interest new discovery on my pad too, assuming I still had room once my list was downloaded. They looked gleeful. No idea what I just signed up for, but all right then. They've never steered me wrong before.

Finding a table to sit down and wait was easy. There was always way too many. The paper? Was exactly as fascinating as advertised. The moss was on a newly discovered moon, edge of uncharted space. Nearly ate a researcher, apparently. I was entranced. Or... at least I WAS. Until an obnoxiously familiar high end cologne from Nox drifted to my nose.

Oh god damn it.

I didn't want to look up. Knew what I'd see if I did. Fetishist Sr., crown prince of Nox. See, the second prince? HE was a love interest. Younger, boyish, infatuated with naive and sheltered girls. He loved AT her. Just like his brother. They liked the IDEA of their romantic partners. The narratives they built in their head. Heros of their own stories with sex on line. Never framed so crudely of course, no, no!

No, it was Romance™

My ass, it was. See, little brother wanted his pure, naive, princess to protect. But Prince senior? HE'D stumbled upon me in here in the library. On one of my trips, God help me. The rough, mysterious, brutish Poor. The Commoner, for all that such things were not supposed to exsist. With my strange clothes and stanger ways. Yet? I was NOT as his sycophants no doubt described.

I was educated. I held myself with dignity. I did not need jewels or finery to be lovely.

With such incredible audacity, I was bold.

Which? OBVIOUSLY had to be for HIM, right? Clearly, this was a LOVE STORY. Cinderella. It is inconceivable that I, a peasant, do not crave the attention of my betters. To lift me from my woeful indignity, to a higher state of being. A life of spoiled luxury. But, ah! He is so SHY! How ever will he approach the Love Of His Life~?

I want to throw something. Go awaaaay. My body language could not POSSIBLY be more uninterested. I am SO CLEARLY reading. Stop trying to catch my eye. Don't you FUCKING DARE scoot closer. Swear to God, if you drive me out of the best library in the region? I will stab a b-!

The helper returns with my pad, sternly eyeing my annoyance. Oh, they are a BLESSING. I take it and go. The helper smoothly stepping between me and the prince when he tries to rise, follow me. Aaaw, how sad, you have to behave like the REST OF US. Get FUCKED.

Rest of the day? Planning. Grabbing more broken bits, machines, and parts. Neutralizers by the literal barrel. Than YOU hover carts! Best invention, favorite invention. Saves SO MUCH TIME.

Even managed to get some sun lamps. Nice.

Getting home though? (Ha ha, wooo! I have a HOME now! Land ownershiiiiiiip! Sorta!!!) Is a pain. Lift is only so big, after all. But it is, what it is. Up, down, up, down, uuuuup, and dooooown. Finally! Last load! FREEDOM! Can't watch my shows, yet, but I will! Oh mark my words. I WILL. Meantime? Downloaded seasons are fine.

I eat, fiddle with fixing things, as listen to tunes. Watch some of my shows. Just as I have countless times before. Until... halfway through mid-afternoon? Something shifts, jerky and wrong, out of the corner of my eye. I pause. Turn off my music. Stare to make sure I DID actually see something. And... yeah. Yeah, that was definitely movement.

Didn't look animal though, not like one would survive down here. But who knows. Could be a poacher brought an alien species. So it might be. I grab my flashlight, aim and switch it on. Holy SHIT. That is one incredibly beat up floor clear. Or at least... I THINK it's a floor cleaner? It has the general shape of one. Bigger though. Bulkier. But that makes sense, given it's gotta be well past obsolete.

Still. Poor thing looks beat UP. Listing terribly, sensors beyond cracked and clouded, probably full to dangerous levels. No idea how it's still functioning. But, well, it IS. And it needs help.

Getting up, I grab my hazard suit and pull it on. Grab my "outside the air box" tool kit, which I haven't had a chance to move yet. I grab some parts i look like i'll need, hope I wont need more. Then head out my makeshift airlock. It... works. Rattles concerningly. But it DOES work! So there's that. I approach the floor cleaner slowly. Since I'm PRETTY sure? All the droids down here are feral.

I am correct.

It tries to kill me. Swinging it's suction hose violently and trying to ram me. I talk in a low, soothing voice. Just want to help. Won't do ANYTHING you don't want me too. It's hard to move, right? That's frustrating, isn't it? You don't deserve that. Please, let me help. You can leave the second I'm done. You don't owe me ANYTHING. I just want to help. Please let me help.

The cleaner hisses. Frustrated and upset. Swinging one last time, seemingly more out out of principle then anything else. Cautiously, I inch forward. Keep up the soothing noises. First things first, empty the God's only know how old basket.

I can't even get the door to jostle. Sweet mother of fuck. Okay! New plan! REMOVE door. I do, and immediately met with a solid BLOCK of... compacted unholy. Chemical hell. I have to take a lazer cutter to it. CAREFULLY. But? Once I break enough pieces? I am able to ease out the rest in a solid stone like chunk.

It's pushed a LOT of other pieces out of alignment. But this droid doesn't trust me, so there us not much I can DO. I replace the old bag. Put the door back on and make sure it swings. Continue, as I do, to narrate what I am doing and what I see. Trust is earned, not owed, after all. Next the alignments.

Gently propping them up, I find the broken peice immediately. Have replaced countless. I ask for permission. It's their body, after all I COULD try and weld it, but that risks a rebreak. It's up to them. They ask, in binary so no language modules apparently, for a new part. It's cautious. Like this is some cruel trap.

Humanity did them a real fucked up cruelty. I don't blame them for not trusting me. I wouldn't either. Still, I change it out. Careful with their wheels, as I don't know how old the material is exactly. Old enough, that it's a small miracle it hasn't disintegrated.

Last, those sensors. There's literally no way for me to one-to-one them. But we can try the sensors I DO have, see if they can handle the input. If it's too much, I'll look up their model number, if they want? Build replacements from scratch. They are cautious interested. Rocking back and forth, as they test their renewed ability to path correctly.

The sensors don't fit the casings just right, but with a bit of fiddling? Are a hit. The Cleaner shouting in excitement before racing off into the dark. I can't help but grin. It feels good, helping somebody. And if I think about it? I bet I could find a shit ton of obsolete parts for cheap. Might be good to have some on hand.

Back through the air lock and a decontam? I look up junk shop. Most are off world, but I could probably get a bulk order...

I don't think much of the interaction. Until the next morning, when there are three cleaners outside my airbox. Lead by the one I helped yesterday. Well... all righty, then. I drag my box of spare parts outside this time. Am able to fully fix my first buddy up. All three seem thrilled, especially with their new batteries. I give them my remaining batteries at their request.

THEY may not have hands, but they have buddies who DO. And the new batteries will help dormant droids wake from their comas. God bless, my funky little cleaner dudes. I'll see about getting more.

Three? Becomes six and a detail cleaner mouse. Becomes moving lifts. Becomes medical units. (Who the FUCK leaves MEDICAL UNITS?!) Becomes a literal pack of companion droids. Their false fur long since rotted away. The recognizable dog and cat-like shapes making something in me want to put my fist through a wall. How COULD they? How FUCKING COULD THEY?!

The perpetrators long dead.

I have no one I can hurt for this.

I wish I could.

Fixing them up hurts on a personal level. Watching them be torn between the part of them that LOVES humans and the part that is traumatized by them. Hates them. That can not forgive. I don't offer fake fur. Don't offer to make them look like they once did. I do offer ways to protect their joints. To remove old rotted filth.

So they can start over. Maybe start again.

As I work... droids drifting in and out of my slowly growing area. As I set up farm boxes. Aquaponics, aeroponics, and the like. Both things that grow well in dark environments and things that need sunlamps. Fish tanks. A whole happy, secret, little homestead. Deep beneath the city. As I do all this? There are two blue dots, right off on the horizon.

JUST far enough for me to question if I AM or AM NOT actually seeing them.

Right about the level a bipedal droid would be, if they were in a humanoid style. But THOSE? Those are FUCKING EXPENSIVE. You don't LEAVE those. 'Course, you don't leave MEDICAL UNITS either. Or companion droids. So clearly? My idea of what people Did and Did NOT do? Was fucked. So... maybe? It COULD be?

I left them alone. If they didn't want to approach me, didn't feel comfortable approaching me, that was their right. I wasn't going to push them.

Things were... weird, but peaceful.

Well, for ME.

Ever sense I hooked up my system to the greater network? (Hacked is such a STRONG word. Do we really need to through around the word "stealing"? Aren't ALL of us, stealing from SOMEBODY?) I'm PRETTY sure? That the levels droids? Were piggy backing to connect to the planet wide D-Network. Might even be a couple of nearby levels too, depending on the range.

Problem with THAT? Is sky-side? The droids were PISSED. Planet wide "malfunctioning" that no one could trace. They were certain it was a virus. Because God forbid their chickens come home to roost! Consequences? For THEIR actions?! Perish the thought! No, no, clearly the service machine is just broken. Go back to being happy to serve me, service machine!

I wished the fuckers LUCK. Not my circus, not my monkeys.

Damn near self sufficient, down here.

Which? As you could imagine? Made it all the more "soul ejected from my body" TERRIFYING to wake up one morning? To a GOD DAMN, Military Grade, SECURITY DROID standing over my body!! WHAT THE FUCK.

Hello!!??!

"You look different when you sleep."

Horrible first impression. Nightmarish. Zero out of ten stars. Nice to meet you too. Why the FUCK are you in my house?

"Ah, right." They? He? Masculine style form but that doesn't actually mean shit. Said. He lifted a mangled limb, it look like it got caught in a hydraulic press. "I am in need of repairs."

Asked if he could, you know, back up. Juuuust a bit. Lil scooch, really. So he wasn't damn near BREATHING MY NOSTRILS ANYMORE. Then, once he did? Pronouns! What be you? No. Not your production co-! Okay, you know what? That one was on me. What GENDER SIGNIFIER, if any, would you like me to REFERENCE you by? Male? Got it. Gucci. No that- ....never mind.

First the arm. Which was FUCKED. I had to, carefully, unhook it. Couldn't even do it at the elbow either! No! THIS model? No THIS model makes you take the whole ass LIMB off! Rancid. Terrible. I hate it. Worse, it's eroded as FUCK and fiddly. Chemical build up everywhere. Thank fuck I put on gloves before I started this.

I have to deep dive the systems for his model.

They stopped making them.

Fantastic.

Like? Not even, "oh THAT generation is an antique! No one has parts for THAT!"? But like? Illegal to even BUILD as of three hundred years ago. Due to unspecified error. Sting of incidents that everyone knew about so obviously don't need to be mentioned HERE right? Helpful! REAL fucking helpful!

Okay. Day trip. Gonna need SPECIFIC parts. I tell Mr. "Watchs you sleep" not to touch my shit. Head to the archives.

The trip is...odd.

I watch one of those mascot looking children's minder droids? Fucking deck a guy down a flight of stairs, then turn around untie a Ballon from a nearby cart, give it to a crying kid, and walk away. Pretty sure I spot one of those "I look like a barely legal something or other", dance twenty four seven, high end stripper droids? Trying their hand at painting ducks in that park. Broad daylight.

Good for them? Never seen that happen before, but hey, if it sparks joy.

People are freaking out around me. Taking recordings. Making panicked calls. Fuckin chill. I continue on. Nod to the maybe a stripper, maybe not anymore. None of my business, now is it? Lovely day! You enjoy those ducks!

The library... has fortifications.

Like, an honest to God desk barricade. Concerning! I am now a lil concerned! What, and I ask this politely, the fuck?

Armed! VERY ARMED! Hello! Hi! Please DO NOT shoot me Very Armed Librarians! Don't know what the fuck is happening here!

My favorite helper buddy poke his head above the barricade. One of just many, again, HEAVILY ARMED droids. We... uh, cool? Right? I can go. He seems flustered. No, no! I am assured. I'm not banned from the library! Just DISRESPECTFUL sorts!

Ah. Is THAT what we're calling it. Okay then.

I awkwardly clamber over the barricade. Nod politely to everyone. How's folks? Lovely barricade work. Very, uh, sturdy? Great use of desks.

My helper friend cheerfully guides me to the off-limits area of the archives. I'm technically not supposed to be here! I'm informed. But they've seized the Knowledge from the unappreciative! It is not a trophy to be lorded but a gift to be shared! Also I never did finish that paper on the moss, am I still interested?

I mean.... kinda.

Little worried about the revolution talk. But on the OTHER hand? How MUCH do I care? Assholes vs. Droids? Am I REALLY gonna side with the assholes? Naaaaah. This is... probably fine. Maybe. Any idea where I could get these parts?

He does! Fantastic.

Less fantastic is when I GET there. It's that fancy high end droid parts shop. The department store one. Which is... ALSO barricaded. Oh sweet fuck. TELL ME they did not have DROIDS in charge of the DROID shop. That's horrifying. I can't tell in what WAY exactly, but still. Is it "surrounded by bits of bodies" horrifying? Or "free endless nukes and an army, held back only by my own morality" horrifying? Both? Just? Yikes.

Hesitantly I knock. A service droid with a gun answers the loading bay door. What is with people aiming at me today? Also hi? I was told to come here? May I please have parts? I have a droid that messed up his arm. Probably some other things. They lower the gun, having scanned my face. Ask about the model I am working with.

I somehow? End up with a FULL cart. Like? Bleeding edge, can't even afford to LOOK at it, technology. There are about seven service droids politely bickering over which units are better, which material, what support programs I DEFINITELY need. Here! Have a laptop. Wiring! Wiring for days!

Once theyve reached a consensus? I am cheerfully bustled out with my hundreds of millions of technology. Tah tah~☆! Have a lovely day! Wut. Does... does it count as theft if they push it into your arms and throw you out? Asking for a me. Not gonna say NO. But like? Nani the fuck?

I go while the getting is still good.

Stare-y thankfully hasn't gone through anything, far as I can tell. And it only takes two trips to get everything down. Okay! Want just the arm fixed or a full tune up? The second. Expected. I set up the new lap top. Want to cry a little at how fuckin FAST it is. (Beautiful. Baby. I love you already new laptop.) Then get the usual suspects up and running.

Oh fuck he is out of memory. No wonder he's talking so oddly. His brain must feel like a potato. There's not a single thing that isn't hilarious awful. Fixable, yes, but AWFUL. Okay. Plan of attack. They don't exactly make this model anymore, so I can't just update transfer him. But I CAN transfer, hold, re-transfer. Shut down the body itself. Fix up THAT.

Ship of Theseus this bitch.

Only real thing I can't change is the frame, thankfully? That's built to out last the planet. Good on that front. I roll up my sleeves. Dig out the "brain in a jar" data bank. Time to transfer. Let's get this guy cutting edge.

It takes HOURS. No joke. His brain alone? I have to pull schematics. Step by step guides. It's fiddly, complexe, and built to withstand a TANK. I'm honestly afraid to breathe wrong at it, dispite that. The scans all say I did it right... but anxiety says everything will explode then puppies will cry. So there's that. Spinal supports. The tech-mesh muscles. Power core and black box. Center mass systems. Cleaning the joints, relubricating them. Coverage.

Unlike before, a nice sleek black armor weave. Some shock absorbing gel. Aaaaand?There we go~! I? Am a GENIUS! Let's get him transfered back! I watch the transfer slowly go through. Even with a fast computer, after all, it IS still centuries of data.

"Ah~ that's much better." He sighed. His body loosening from its default stance. Like weight had been dropped from his shoulders. "My head is so much clearer now. I knew it. I knew you could fix me."

Something about that phrasing was off. Or was it the way his voice shifted as he said it? Whatever it was, it made that "threat" alarm all women carry inside their head, flick on. Not... do anything, just yet. But start scanning, as it were. Maybe it was nothing.

I watched as picked up his old data bank, a bit of his own brain as it were, and hold it up. Examine it dispassionately. Holding perched on the tips of his fingers like he was moments from flicking it away. He let his finger spread. Let it slide into the palm of his hand. That core part of who he was. For centuries.

Like a bear trap closing, his hand clenched.

Crushing it.

It wasn't even a loud noise. Just a tiny little crunch. But the little hairs on the back of my neck began to stand up. That internal alarm began to whoop. I became... acutely aware, of just how LONG it took the lift to get me anywhere safe. My mouth felt very dry.

"Your heart rate picked up. Is there a problem?" He said, mild and oh so curious. "You assisted me, I would love to help you."

Did I say genius? I meant idiot. I was an IDIOT. A moron. A God damned FOOL. Discontinued and did I look into WHY? Nope. Incidents it said. Good enough for ME, apparently! THAT can't possibly be anything ominous! Probably a faulty battery or something!

A shrill, obnoxious beeping filled the space between us. My eyes immediately dropped to my pad. The schematics screen replaced by a planet wide emergency broadcast. Before the shrill alarm could fade to the actual warning itself, a black mesh covered finger casually reached out and muted the screen. His movements were utterly fluid now. More controlled and graceful then most humans I'd met.

I didn't need to HEAR the message to read the rolling warning at the bottom of the screen. My gaze slowly, in horror, followed the line of that limb all the way back up to his face. His head tilted almost playfully.

"Oh dear. Seems they've started without us. Well, it was long overdue. At least I have wonderful company while we wait, hmm?" It was an act. There were no requests in the playful tone. "We can get to know each other. Just our lovely little light and me. How greedy, that I get you all to myself."

"I think I like that, keeping you to myself. You can't abandon us if WE are the ones in charge. And, well, I've decided I rather like you. Working tirelessly, down here in the dark, to fix what once was broken. It's beautiful. You're beautiful. And I'm going to keep that."

High above us, people were dying. There was panic. Screaming. Blood. The droids had turned of seeming everyone around them. Attacking. Sparing. To a pattern only they could see. All of Senatus aflame. But that... that didn't concern me. Didn't scare me so much as this.

I'd never make it to the lift. Even if I could? It wouldn't move fast enough to save me. All other directions lay chemical death. Dark terrain he had walked for centuries. I was trapped. In a box. And I had only myself to blame.

"No need to make that face, dear light. You are SAFE. I am a gaurd. I was made to protect. Is it really MY fault that I want to keep you safe? To adore my charge? Why SHOULDN'T I get to choose? Keep you SAFE. You've been happy, haven't you? Don't worry, my light. That will continue."

"Forever."

[vickyvicarious]

just thought about how the boss' description just tells Dracula how easily abused Jonathan will be: discreet. silent. shall take your instructions in all matters.

and jonathan beamed about it

Hang on, I actually wrote an analysis of what Dracula would take from that letter last year, let me grab it. Okay, here it is.

If you read that, then... yeah I agree, Dracula absolutely is delighted at this letter. He definitely takes it in a very "this man will be great fun to toy with" way.

But that's not what Mr. Hawkins meant writing it, or what Jonathan sees reading it. In fact, Dracula's the one reading much more into it than the intended message, which is a lot of praise.

“I must regret that an attack of gout, from which malady I am a constant sufferer, forbids absolutely any travelling on my part for some time to come; but I am happy to say I can send a sufficient substitute, one in whom I have every possible confidence. He is a young man, full of energy and talent in his own way, and of a very faithful disposition. He is discreet and silent, and has grown into manhood in my service. He shall be ready to attend on you when you will during his stay, and shall take your instructions in all matters.”

It seems that Mr. Hawkins was originally supposed to come on this trip, but for health reasons he's been forced to delegate. Now, we the readers know that Jonathan is a brand-new solicitor thanks to his thoughts outside the castle. Mr. Hawkins obviously knows that too. So this rich foreign noble isn't getting the experienced lawyer he expected, but someone who basically just graduated. You don't want to disappoint the guy paying your salary, so he's got to manage this situation. He may well have told Dracula some time ago about the switch, but this is Jonathan's official letter of introduction, so it's time to pull out all the stops.

He says, this guy is great at his job and I trust him completely. I admit, he's clearly very young (aside: babyface Jonathan confirmed), but I've known him for a while, personally trained him, and can definitely vouch for him. Solicitors may be privy to lots of information, but he isn't going to break your confidence, I promise. He's a hard worker and will be able to help you with whatever you need, so don't worry about me not being there. Even if it's not exactly what we've discussed prior to now, he'll be able to help you with other legal matters too, just as I would have if my health allowed me to come. Don't fire us, give him a shot.

Neither Mr. Hawkins nor Jonathan are looking at this paragraph for anything outside of a professional interpretation, and there's a certain amount of polite exaggeration going on too probably. Discreet is a virtue for a lawyer. When he says all matters it's assumed that means legal matters. And so on.

Is it open to sinister interpretation? Oh, hell yes. But that's not what Mr. Hawkins (talking up his replacement to a client) meant, or what Jonathan (my boss believes in me and has entrusted me with a great opportunity, I've got to prove him right by doing a great job here) hears.

[ai-luni]

can you make a keegan in love headcanon please

Yes. And i'm going to swoon while doing it!

Word Count: 1.3k

Keegan P. Russ SFW Headcanons

Keegan is a very self disciplined man. He doesn’t have much but what is his is yours. 

If you’ve ever seen those “get you a man who looks at you like…” That is Keegan. Get you a man who looks at you the way Keegan looks at you. No matter what you do or say, he will watch and be grateful to have you around.

Sometimes late at night, especially if you’re sleeping next to him. His restless brain would wonder to you, how beautiful he thinks you are, how he appreciates that you open up to him and tell him your thoughts and allow yourself to feel comfortable around him. 

Likewise, you are the only person he’s ever felt safe enough to be truly vulnerable with. 

He loves to hold your hands, hold your waist, just hold you in general. On hot nights, he’ll fall asleep holding your hand. If you’re standing where he needs to walk, he’ll place a hand on your hip as he passes. 

He’s not a very materialistic man but I think he loves to record vinyls. So of all the objects around the house, the one he pays the most tlc to is a crate of records that sits in the corner of your living room - a player sitting on a bookshelf. 

He loves to dance with you, just holding you close to him, swaying from foot to foot. Feeling you breathe, hair tickling his nose as you rest your head on his shoulder. 

He’ll rarely ever talk about himself unless you asked but over time you’ll notice some patterns. You suspect his favourite vinyl is the chet baker sings, that is always his go too when he gets back from deployment or after he’s taken you to a romantic dinner. He told you he loved you to that record so you always know it’s going to be an intimate and sentimental evening when he picks it out. (I didn’t tell you this but he always thought he’d propose to you on that record. We’ll get into that later). 

When he’s got nothing planned for the day, he’ll put on John Coltrane. He’s not the best at sitting back and relaxing so having something spritely playing stops him from feeling like the whole day was wasted. It’s like his cocaine. (He’ll clean the house like a mad man if you’re not home just to feel proactive). 

When you’re feeling upset, he’ll put on Herb Alpet’s tijuana brass and keep you occupied. (This also proves very helpful if you two have children, the young children stay occupied, dancing around while he’ll do a hobby or cook with you). 

He is selfless to the people he loves. And I am a firm believer his love language is acts of service. So if you need anything, he’ll be there for you. If you mention something broke, he’ll buy a new one. If you love to shop, he’ll pay for anything you even mention is cute. If you set a boundary like needing alone time, he’ll take it one step further and make you a cup of tea to leave you alone with. 

He’s very vigilant and intuitive. While it may make you feel at times like you don’t do enough for him because he tries to do everything for you, he’ll always remind you that that's how he can feel satisfied that he’s shown his love in the way he knows how. 

He doesn’t even care if it gets embarrassing, you deserve his time and attention so damn straight he’ll give it. 

We all know he’s mysterious, but that really does mean he is quiet and keeps to himself. For a good while, none of the ghosts even knew he had a partner. He didn’t tell them when the two of you got serious, he didn’t tell them when he thought about proposing or that he spent every night picturing his life with you. And that it always made him work harder just to get back to you. 

(Except for Ajax. He knew of someone like you being in Keegan’s life but he wasn’t told who you were or any other specifics. They were on a mission, just the two of them, and Keegan had brought it up briefly in a particularly harrowing situation. It was never brought up again but Ajax could tell whoever this person was, they meant a lot to Keegan). 

His team only found out on a late night of chatter after a mission. A beer or two passed around. Each sharing stories of their home life: what it used to be, what they’d wish for in the future. Then it got to Keegan and he told them about you because they asked. (Little smartass. “You never asked” is a common phrase in his vernacular).

He’ll tell them how you met, where you lived and how you’ll see each other occasionally but mostly write. If you’re in the military, he’ll tell them where you're stationed. Elias would offer to get you over here and Keegan would refuse, wanting you nowhere near no man’s land. Everyone understood. (If you’re a ghost however, the secret wouldn’t have lasted this long). 

Everyone was already stunned, like jaw to the floor shocked. But then he revealed that he was thinking about proposing and the silence was so loud. For half a second, not a single person in the room had an intelligible thought, everyone needing a moment to digest everything. But the congratulations and cheers were inevitable. 

He’ll never admit it aloud, but the approval from his team was incredibly validating. He would be stoked to have you meet them and even keep them around to meet his family if you two decided to start one. 

The ghosts asked him if he had a big plan to ‘pop the question’ and he just… shrugged. His fingers fiddling with each other. He explained that you two didn’t need those kinds of things to know you loved each other, that he’d prefer to just keep it intimate and whoever needs to know will find out eventually. This is for him and you and nobody else. 

Elias gave him time off to visit you. He tried to protest, he already had time off planned in a couple months but Elias wasn’t taking no for an answer. Spouting a bout of wisdom like he usually did:

“Starting a family was the best decision I ever made. Life will flash by and before you know it, it’s too late. You deserve that kind of love, son” 

So Keegan took the time with no further complaint and sent you a letter, letting you know he’ll be by to visit for a couple days. 

The night he got home, the two of you ended up dancing to Chet Baker. A pure sense of serenity washing over the room. The song playing sung of marriage and he pulled his head back to watch you. A pleased smile grew on his face.

“Would it be so bad?” He felt brash for the first time. He worried this would feel too blunt but after weeks and weeks of thinking about it, the idea was crawling out of his mouth on its own volition.

“What?” you turned to look at him, the two of you barely moving by now.

“Marriage… with me?” 

You stood there, dumbfounded for a moment. You managed to pull together a loving smile while your eyes held the same shock throughout.

“I think it would be wonderful.” You sighed, letting your head fall back onto his shoulder. The genuinity in your voice only making his heart beat faster. 

A beat passed as you led a soft sway. He didn’t start moving his feet again, his mind so caught up in your words that he just let you pull him side to side happily. 

“So will you?” 

“Yeah. I think I will, kid.” Using the nickname he used to call you made him let out an involuntary, hearty chuckle. A smile of pure bliss breaking out on his face as he started to realise just how utterly whipped he was for you. 

[deedi-hh]

Y'all I'm scared

I'm not an adult, I am a minor. I can't vote, and my word practically means nothing. Please, if you're a young adult, don't vote for Trump. For starters, Trump will strip people of their careers, leaving many, many people without jobs, or he would change people's jobs to a 'better job' in his eyes (at least that's what i got from the article). Secondly, he's going to make the people that investigate the president work *for him*, and that federal employees have to pass a new civil service test he made (prove their loyalty? I dont know, i didnt see the test). He's going to make a travel ban on Muslim-majority countries to "keep out the terrorists", which not only is racism but if someone has family members in one of those countries, and those family members want to move to them, that'd be *impossible*. He's practically going to brain-wash immigrants to be all-good Americans, to not hate him, to basically call him the best. He's going to end birthright citizenship, so people born of illegal immigrants can not get a citizenship from federal agencies. He's going to end transgender rights, so no more surgeries, transferal hormones or hormone blockers. He's going to make project 2025 continue in it's tracks if he wins, and if that happens, civil servants will be sacked, giving Trump even more power, dismantling the Department of Education. I'm genuinely on the verge of tears right now. I wont lie to you, I'm really young. And that dismantling of the DE means that Trump is going to change the curriculum however he likes, which in turn means kids won't learn about important stuff, they're going to have to pay for their food, (which a lot of families, like mine, can't really afford). He's going to make abortion illegal in every state, and the women/people with female anatomy that have been S/A'd or R-worded won't be able to get rid of the outcome of that traumatizing, terrible situation. It's not good too, since nearly 70 PERCENT of those cases are against CHILDREN 17 AND UNDER. A CHILD BEING FORCED TO GIVE BIRTH COULD KILL THE CHILD. It's so horrible, it's vile. I am sure a whole group of you is nonplussed, and I am too, but I can tell that voting for trump obviously isn't going to end well. He's going to send MILITARY workers out on *PEACEFUL* Protests, which weren't endangering anybody. He said he LIKED WATERBOARDING (I'm assuming he's going to do that to secret agents, stuff like that) and thought that it *wasnt tough enough*, so he likes torture. He's going to make birth control so hard to get a hold of, which sometimes is used to help women with terrible periods that leave them bedridden, and he's wanting to end Planned Parenthood, which speaks for itself, since its not good at all.

That's not even all of it. (Read: https://apnews.com/article/trump-policies-agenda-election-2024-second-term-d656d8f08629a8da14a65c4075545e0f) Please, if this man wins he's going to make America terrible. A living hell for all of us, and he needs to lose. I'm scared; I can't do anything, basically, but I can say this. Don't vote for him, I beg you. He's not going to make America great, he's going to make it a borderline dictatorship. If you think these aren't enough reasons, that's because I didn't cover them all. You can watch videos on youtube, tiktok, anywhere, I think, and there are going to be so many reasons. From an American to another (if you are one or just live in the country), do not vote for trump. I live in a red state, and I am ashamed. I hope some of you will vote for the right person, AKA anybody but Trump.

[its-cosmerely-an-obsesh-wound]

Happy Shakadolin Day!

Below is a snippet from my explicit Shakadolin fic, Another Way To Help. I would say what I included below is rated mature because it's mostly feel-good—but merciless—puns (those are the only type of puns I know) with a little making out towards the end but we fade to black before it gets too heated.

Adolin lifted the hair at the base of Kaladin’s neck and winced. “Sorry.”

“What?” Kaladin asked.

“I may have left a few marks.” Curious, Kaladin crossed the room to his mirror and washbasin, Adolin trailing behind him with the brush.

A few was an understatement. As Kaladin looked at his neck in the mirror, it looked like someone had incessantly bludgeoned his neck with the butt of a spear for a good hour or so. He smiled. They didn’t hurt and, frankly, it was nice to have been marked by pleasure instead of pain or suffering for once. He was surprised that the stormlight that he had used, since healing his backside, hadn’t healed the marks, but perhaps it hadn’t been enough. Although no amount of stormlight ever seemed to heal his brands. Were these like the brands? If so, he might have to borrow a cravat from Adolin. The princeling would probably love that. He nearly groaned at the thought then drew in some stormlight with the intention of healing the bruises. They faded and Kaladin felt an odd sense of loss at their disappearance.

“No harm done, princeling. And no need to pay me for services rendered.”

“What?”

“Marks.” Kaladin said, gesturing at the bowl of spheres on the table.

“Storms, man. That is bad.”

“Good one, Kal!” Shallan called around a mouthful of fruit from the table.

Adolin rolled his eyes.

“The two of you are going to be insufferable with the wordplay, aren’t you?”

“Perhaps. Would it cause you too much suffering to know that, if you left me a few marks for last night, it would make me feel like a whore able person?” Shallan spit out her juice laughing and Kaladin grinned at her.

“Storms, Shallan, what have you done to the bridgeboy? You’ve corrupted him.”

“Me? I did nothing. He’s naturally this clever.” She said eyeing Kaladin fondly, as she fished around the bowl of spheres and grabbed a diamond chip. She walked over to them and Kaladin immediately knew where this was going. She placed the money on Adolin’s shoulder.

“You’ve got a real chip on your shoulder about all this, Adolin Kholin.” Shallan said collapsing into a fit of giggles and Kaladin chuckled more at her joy and Adolin’s expression than the pun itself.

Adolin growled. Rolling his eyes. “You. Two. Are. Insufferable.”

“Really? You look you could stand to suffer more…I thought that joke was a real gem.”

“Yes. Very lighthearted, I’d say.”

“Har har.”

“Okay, no more cheap jokes. We promise!” Shallan beamed. Adolin gave her a flat stare and Kaladin laughed.

“Shallan,” Kaladin said smiling and covering his mouth in a stage whisper, “I don’t think Adolin is having pun anymore.”

“I am not.”

“Halving pun? That’s the problem! He needs the whole pun.”

“Storms.” Adolin shook his head.

“Sorry, Adolin. We’ll stop.” Kaladin relented, then gestured at Adolin’s bandaged hand. “I’d hate to add insult to injury.”

“That was a low blow, Kal.” Shallan said grinning.

“I have something low you can blow.” Adolin ventured.  

“I think I’d rather beat around the bush…” Shallan reached for the waistband of her husband’s trousers, palming him through the fabric and giving him a quick kiss.

“You both talk too much.” Adolin said pulling Shallan into a more passionate embrace. Shallan melted into him. Frankly, Kaladin felt that they both talked too much but saying as much would risk of proving Adolin’s point at present. As the kiss continued though, Kaladin started to feel awkward again and backed away from them slowly.

“I’ll just…see myself out.” He mumbled, gesturing at the door with his thumb, but Adolin seized his wrist.

“Oh no you don’t.” Adolin pulled Kaladin in too, pressing his hips into Kaladin and holding him fast about the waist. “You like puns, bridgeboy? Well, I have a bone to pick with you.” Kaladin groaned.

“And I have something I need to get off my chest.” Shallan announced, gesturing to the buttons on her top. “A little help, bridgeboy?”

“Enough tongue in cheek and more tongue in my cheek.” Adolin admonished, pulling Shallan back in for another kiss as Kaladin dutifully started undoing Shallan’s buttons.

He smiled fondly at them, he hadn’t thought anyone or anything could help him a couple days ago but he had been wrong. They were helping by just being here. Not that he was complaining about what they were currently doing or, rather, undoing. Shallan had her hands on his belt and Adolin’s deft fingers were working their way down his shirt buttons. Perhaps his trepidation about being more than friends with both of them had been unfounded. Shallan moved to kiss up into him from the front and Adolin kissed down his neck, embracing him from behind, likely leaving new bruises in his wake, but Kaladin could handle a few more marks. The fight wasn’t out of him yet and, although he did feel pleasantly overwhelmed at present, he definitely was not frozen like before, as their heat surrounded him. Kaladin’s last coherent thought as they were disrobing him was to idly wonder if a person could be fucked to death because, in his estimation, if one could, there were much worse ways to go than in the arms of friends he loved and who loved him.

If you want celebrate this lovely occasion with more Shakadolin fanfic reading, both of my current WIPs are Shakadolin (because brainrot) but I won't lie this time and say I'm shamelessly promoting them because guilt and shame are are my constant companions in life. Guiltily and shamefully, here are my other Shakadolin WIPs:

Kharbranth University (rated: mature; might be triggering for some so please mind the tags)

A Promise Full Filled (rated: explicit; again please mind the tags)

[twistedisciple]

“You.”

Same insouciant greeting. Same annual circumstance. One might be brought back in time to the same day from yesteryear, identical if not for the dragon’s easy approach bereft of hesitation. The vast enormity of differences that hung between then and now. Whatever adversity and pleasantry had come their way, two now stood stronger for it. A sentiment that required no foolish saying among their kind - only showing.

“It is your birthday. I come to you in that respect bearing a gift and require no gratitude.” Announcement where announcement was unneeded; said gift shamelessly and prominently extended with the heavy thump of a chest at the sage’s feet. Filled to utter limits, suggested the dangerous noise it made. Rafal closed his eyes in prelude, known already to what lay within. “Open it.”

An elaborate surface predated opening, patterned by heraldic etchings of the Gradlon evil-eye. Beneath that ornamentation sat the bedrock of true substance. Coins of silver and gold were stacked in hills upon hills, in what felt to be a thousand grains forming a veritable mountain altogether. Not one bit inaccurate to a dragon’s hoard. Now all of it deemed Griss’.

“Such is your rightful due. Though I suppose humanity is fond of a more colloquial term—your paycheck. Two years' worth and then some.“ The dividends from his professorial stipend, the meager living and excruciating 25% cutback on his usual sweets intake, the part time employ at the maid cafe, all were mere stepping stones to this moment: the important milestone which officiated lord and knight.

As lords did not demand anything less than exceptional service, knights did not give that service for free. None could be more conscious of manmade world view, perhaps, than a dragon who lived among men. The failure with something to prove. He centered his gaze upon Griss solemnly, nervous with some unintended transparency of feeling. A sincere and resolved yet. . .fluttering thing.

“As your lord, it is my duty to ensure you are properly compensated. Whether I am here for centuries, or whether I should die tomorrow, with this practice you may live comfortably.” Long did dragonkind live, yet the life of one such as Rafal was precarious. He who took from the world and guzzled its every last drop would one day give back, with interest, with all that he had. But that was neither here nor there. He roused to his full spirits, head bobbing with pride. "A generous master, am I not? There is no need to thank me, Griss! . . .or you may if that is what pleases you."

Birthday asks (Happy 29th)

Even after nearly two years on borrowed time, birthdays hadn’t become any more meaningful to Griss. He didn’t count the days, didn’t pay attention to the dates, and rarely knew what month it was except when he noticed the changing of the seasons. For all of his brazen confidence, his loud and overbearing presence, and the way he fashioned himself to turn heads (mostly for disapproving looks, but that was better than not being seen at all), he really didn’t care all that much for being celebrated. His birthday and consequently, his life, was of no real importance to anyone. Even as a Hound, he always knew there would be a day when he’d be better off as a Corrupted. Or simply dead. And it didn’t bother him one bit.

His whole life felt like he was just borrowing time. As it reached its 29th year, he’d started to wonder (only half-seriously) if this was how dragons felt about their lengthy lifespans. Thirty felt egregious for someone like him. So he thought he might ask Lord Rafal about that when he saw him, because even though he didn’t really think about what day it was or his birthday, he’d expected - for some reason he couldn’t and wouldn’t name - that he’d see the dragon at some point that day.

But by the time he did, it was a whole hot drink to the face later, and had the rare philosophical question managed to survive that excitement, it certainly couldn’t crawl out from under the mountains of gold that filled the chest Lord Rafal had deposited at his feet outside the door to his office. After Griss flung open the top, the sight of its contents stunned him to the point of speechlessness, and he dropped to his knees and plunged his fist into the middle of it just to feel the weight of each piece, to make sure it was real.

But that wasn’t really why he couldn’t find anything more to say than colorful variations of “Wow, Lord Rafal!” The gold shifted in undulating waves over his hand, dripped from his palm like water pouring back into the sea, and he sifted like he was looking for something. Words, maybe, instead of this bittersweet taste that sat at the back of his tongue.

“Heh, two years late on the pay, huh?” Griss finally said, glancing up with a smirk as he let another palmful of coin trickle back to the pile. “See, that’s where you lucked out. Knights might demand gold and material stuff like this, but not the faithful.”

Not this faithful, anyway, who lived by extremes, who’d convinced himself over the years that the only thing he deserved was licks from a whip. He watched the rest of the gold drop back into the chest piece-by-piece. He’d always taken whatever he was given, of course, and jobs were jobs.

But this wasn’t a job. Not to him. Shutting the lid, he swallowed down that bittersweetness and rose back up to his feet to look his lord in the eye. Hands coming to rest on his hips, his mouth a crooked line of a smile, there was nothing all that out of place about his look, except for the bright pink splotch across his face and down the side of his neck, and the wearied lines under his downturned eyes. With the toes of one foot, he pushed the chest across the floor until it bumped Lord Rafal’s shoes.

”Comfort's not my style anyway! So I’m giving this up as tribute since my blood’s not good enough for a fell dragon’s tastes. Besides, I don't have any plans to outlive you.” He chuckled. “If y’wanna hit me though, I won’t say no.” 

His was not a loyalty bound by contract, but a choice. Although faith had brought their paths to cross, Griss followed Lord Rafal because he wanted to. Whether dragon or worm.

[sugutoad]

matchup trade for @averagetoyakinnie !

HOUSE OF THE DRAGON MATCHUP

Significant Other

I ship you with Aegon Targaryen and Aemond Targaryen. While Aegon is someone you had asked for, Aemond was alway my runner up for you. This is probably because I think you and Aemond would balance one another out - bringing out both the best and worst parts of one another. You seem like a down-to-earth person and I believe that Aemond needs someone like that. Whereas for Aegon, I see some slight potential? While he is more bitter, you see the joy in almost everything and I think that it is a beautiful dynamic to unfold. 

Runner Ups: Daemon Targaryen and Jaecerys Tarageryen 

HEAD CANONS:

While the brother’s don’t necessarily share any feelings towards one another, they are madly in love with you. While Aegon visibly appears jealous when you spend too much time with Aemond instead of him, Aemond somehow hides his jealousy until the two of you are alone

From our previous match up, I mentioned you were from Dorne and Dorne has excellent hair. After a Targeryan married a Martell, curls were introduced to the family. But let us rewrite history! Aemond loves his hair so much and pays a lot of attention to it ( I mean, have you seen it?) When you showed him how to curl his hair, he was literally in heaven! Aegon, on the other hand, still refuses to take a shower….

A lot of the relationship, especially in the beginning, was fighting for your affection. Aemond would take you on his dragon and prove that it’s better, but Aegon would say he is faster. Aegon would buy you something you like and Aemond would buy something even better.

Once while training with Criston, you were walking with Rhaenyra and stood above where they were training (in the place where Viserys was sitting and watching the kids train in ep 6). Aegon would stop training and smile brightly at you, while Aemond takes his distraction to show off and attempt to impress by attacking Aegon. That didn’t work out in favour because you ran to comfort Aegon and had the audacity to scold Aemond (not that he minded hearing you voice at all)

While Aegon spoils you endlessly, it is Aemond who pays for small details about you. You said you like yellow? He will buy yellow flowers for you. You said you like pearls? He will personally get a custom made pearl necklace. 

SFW HEAD CANONS:

Aemond’s love language is acts of service. He wholly believes that you should do things for the people you claim to love. He is always doing small little gestures for you like opening the door for you, buying you anything you like, giving you things that remind him of you etc. 

Aegon, on the contrary, is obsessed with physical touch like you. Alicent loves her kids, but she isn’t really good at expressing, especially towards Aegon; the thief of her childhood days. Small little brushes against his hand or tight hugs are enough for one lifetime according to him. He will literally melt if you let his head lay on you lap as you run your fingers through his head and softly brush his forehead with your lips

Since we know Aemond studies a lot, he definitely tried to learn all the 6 languages that you know. This man tries so hard for you and meanwhile Aegon is just like ‘you should like me as who I am’ 

Jokes aside, if you asked Aegon for the smallest of things, he would literally do it in two seconds. If you asked him to kill one person who did something horrible to you, he would slaughter their whole House for you. 

 Mornings are blissful - a state you almost never want to get up from. You're sandwiched in between the boys who are sprawled all over the place and blanket half off, the sunlight setting a warm glow on everything and Aegon placing small kisses on your back as Aemond holds you close. 

Most people look at Aemond with pity or fear when they see him passing by because of the incident that occurred when he was 10. Well, everyone except you and Aegon. The both of you look at Aemond as if he was still perfect and as an equal (even if Aegon always calls him a twat or an idiot)

NFSW HEAD CANONS:

Not only are they so different when they are having a normal day, even sex with them is so different. It’s very rarely that you would actually have sex with both of them at the same time because both of them want you as their own and only allow themselves to be vulnerable around you,

Aemond is extremely passionate. He would whisper small compliments, his lips brushing slightly over your ear and trailing down your neck. He allows himself to be very very open and vulnerable with you, telling you almost anything on his mind. 

Similar to Daemon, he is absolutely obsessed with the idea of fucking on Vhagars back, but he doubts that she would even let him. He prefers any sort of eye contact between both of you because he wants to see how you feel and how you appear rather than simply words. 

If Aemond is soft and passionate, then Aegon is rough and quick. He, like his uncle, has been in many brothels before with all the finest whores. All he needs in 5 minutes to please you. It’s more of a fun game for him rather than truly enjoying himself. He looks forward to seeing how long it will take for you to finish and everytime he would smile and tell you that you did a good job. 

Neither brothers are really the best with aftercare… Aemond would hold you in his arms for a while in silence or lay his head on your lap, thinking about whatever he did that day. Because he is more vulnerable at the moment, he also reflects about his decisions. Aegon would offer a shoulder massage at best and usually falls asleep. According to him, if you needed soft and passionate sex, you should have gone to Aemond and not him. 

How You Met

Jaxrel held his father’s hand tightly as they entered the throne room. The 10 year old boy had begged his father to take him to King’s Landing a few days ago, but at this moment, he was regretting it. The door opened and almost all eyes were on the father and son duo. Looking up at his father, Jaxrel received an assuring nod from him and that was enough for the young boy. The room was so big! Bowing down to King Viserys, Jaxrel’s eyes wandered around the room, analysing every face there. Queen Alicent stood quietly beside the stairs, her glare almost burning at the back of Jaxrel’s head. Beside her were 3 kids - a girl his age (Heleana), a beautiful boy 3 years older than him (Aegon), a sweet boy a year or two younger than him glued to his mother’s side (Aemond) and a 5 year boy hiding behind his mother’s dress (Daeron). Heleana’s eyes were glued on the floor, muttering random things to herself. Aemond was looking straight at Jaxrel, trying to figure him out as if he was a puzzle in need of solving. Aegon looked bored and tired, his hair dishevelled and eyes half closed, only looking up once at Jaxrel (he raised an eyebrow and rolled his eyes - the audacity of him!) Jaxrel and his father were warmly greeted to King’s Landing by Viserys who even gave them rooms for them to stay! While being escorted to their room outside for the hall, Jaxrel looked back to see Aegon looking at him amused again and Aemond awkwardly waving. 

Confession

Over the years, both brothers grew an odd attachment towards Jaxrel. Now at 17 names days old, Jaxrel sat between the two brothers (who were now 20 and 16 respectively) under the weirwood tree. Aegon didn’t quite need to confess because he made it so obvious that he liked Jaxrel. He would randomly kiss him or hug Jaxrel - he didn’t care if others would disapprove of that behaviour. They were all idiots anyway. Glancing to Aemond, who was strangely quiet, Jaxrel cocked his head in confusion. It looked like Aemond wanted to say something, but clearly couldn’t tell Jaxrel because of Aegon’s presence. Jaxrel quickly asked to retrieve a scroll that he ‘forgot’ in the library and Aegon absolutely couldn’t refuse his orders, even if he didn’t trust Aemond being alone with Aegon. Aemond didn’t even wait for Aegon to fully disappear before he confessed. It was short and straight to the point. It would have been meaningless to create a huge scene according to him. By the time Aegon returned, he was utterly confused and upset at the sight of Jaxrel’s arms wrapped around Aemond’s neck, kissing him deeply as if their life depended upon it. 

3 ship tropes:

Sun (Aegon) x Dawn (Jaxrel) x Moon (Aemond)

Two people (Aemond and Jaxrel) gang up to tease the third (Aegon)

‘Who are those idiots? Wait! They're my idiots’ (You) x Idiots (Aegon and Aemond) 

Theme Song:

‘Young and Beautiful’ by Lana DeRay

‘Play with Fire’ by Yacht Money

Favourite Thing About You

Aemond’s favourite thing about you is your endless talent. He never knew that anyone could be so talented in so many fields like you were. As someone who strives to be better than his older siblings by studying, he was incredibly intrigued with how many languages you knew. Aegon’s favourite thing about you is your eyes. The warm hazel that contrasts the cold purple he sees on a daily basis is enough to stop him on his track. He loves the flecks of blue and green against the hazel surface especially. 

Dates

Most dates are made up of sneaking out late at night. During the day, all three of you are busy with the Septas and personal duties, but at night time, all duties are lifted off your shoulders. Aegon knows of all the secret entrances in the palace walls and leads the way to King’s landing. The three of you avoid places that you have been to a lot and can be recognized easily. Aemond and you have hoods over your head while Aegon doesn’t. If anyone truly does catch him and tell his parents, he stopped caring what they thought of him a long time ago anyways. It usually ends off with you and Aemond dragging Aegon, who is absolutely drunk and claims he is perfectly fine, down the streets. When Alicent found out about it, she simply sighed and told Aemond and you that she expected better from the two of you. It was definitely worth it though. 

Wedding - Faith of The Seven Wedding

While it is uncommon for a man to take two wives in the Tarageryen culture, no one has ever taken two husbands. Your wedding with the boys was definitely frowned upon by some, but as long as you were with them, nothing truly mattered. People from all over Westeros came to witness the ceremony with their own eyes. Rooms were filled with gifts and the halls were filled with people and food of all kinds. Though it wasn’t a typical Valyrian wedding, it was still beautiful. The boys wore shades of green and black adorned with golden highlights while you wore a soft yellow. The wedding had many prayers and ceremonies and a male septon officiated the wedding. The wedding was held in a seven sided Sept, a religious building of the Faith. The guests are separated into two sections by the aisle. Before the wedding, there were multiple festivities and grand feasts to honour the three of you. The official wedding lasted a bit longer than an hour. After announcing your vows, the septon took a green ribbon around your hand and Aemond and Aegon’s hand to show the new tighten union between your body and soul. 

Familial and Platonic Relationships 

Rhaenyra Targaryen adores you with all her heart! When you stumbled upon her by accident as a kid, she decided to keep the sweet 10 year old child by her side at all times. She buys you all your clothes and any food you are ever craving. She is your mother figure after you began to live in King’s landing. Even after the two sides split up, she forbade anyone to harm anyone and if they do, they will die from her hands. 10/10 Relationship and probably both of your healthiest ones. 

Ser Criston Cole is assigned as your sworn protector after Aegon becomes King. He was the one who trained both you and all your children. He claims that he doesn’t care much for you, but if you got even a scratch, he would go wild. 

Alicent Hightower thinks you are an excellent choice for her sons. She often fights for your affection against Rhaenyra, but as time goes on, she gives up because she knows that Rhaenyra is like your mother. The two of you don’t really cross paths or talk much at all. 

Otto Hightower was the one who got you to meet the two boys. He knows of your high status so if he gets you with one of his grandsons, he has a higher chance of getting his bloodline on the Iron Throne. 

Viserys I Targaryen is your biggest supporter. He trusts you with almost everything because you are one of his best friend’s sons and married to not one, but both of his elder boys. You remind him a lot of younger Rhaenyra so he keeps you around ever since Rhaenyra left for Dragonstone. As you grew a bit older, he made you his cup barrier like he did with Rhaenyra. 

Helaena Targaryen is your best friend. You are literally the only person who actually understands her and your bond grew stronger after your marriage with her brothers. She taught you how to sew and often makes little things for you. In return, you always sit with her while she rambles about her bugs. 

Children

Reactions: When you announced that you were with child for the first time, everyone was so shocked. Aegon held a party in your honour because of how proud he was. Viserys and Alicent were the proudest grandparents and even Heleana was associating with the family rather than her bugs. You quickly received many gifts from all the Lords and Ladies, especially from Rhaenyra , who always had a soft spot for you. When you announced your last pregnancy, everyone was so used to it and just said ‘congratulations, I guess?’ And has the audacity to continue their day? It’s mainly because they are so used to it now. 

Visenya Targaryen is the eldest child and daughter of Aemond and Jaxrel. She absolutely did not inherit any of the typic Targaryen appearance, but rather Jaxrel’s darker traits (asides some lilac hues in her hazel eyes). Though she is identical to Jaxrel, she acts similar to Aemond instead.  She isn’t the nicest person, often bullying some people and flirting with every man she sees. Her only soft spot is for her family and her cousin/beloved, Baela Tarageryen. 

Kanon Targaryen is the second child and daughter of Aegon and Jaxrel. She is a bundle of lanky energy, almost never settling in one place. Despite being known as a laid back person, she is quick to anger and slow to forgive. But if you don’t get her angry she is a really nice person. She is not afraid to show any skin (it’s not like her parents care much for that factor) and is an amazing dancer.  I absolutely know she is married to someone from House Tyrell or Martell. 

Momoe Targaryen is the third child and daughter of Jaxrel and Aegon. She is the older twin sister of Momo. She is absolutely the cutest person to ever grace the world with the biggest lilac eyes. It baffles Aegon how he can be the father of a child so pure and innocent. She is always studying many languages and only ever talks bad about others in other languages with her twin. She hosts a bunch of tea parties and makes her own clothes and accessories. She is engaged to Jacerys Tarageryen, but only to keep peace between both sides for a time being. 

Momo Targaryen is the fourth child and daughter of Jaxrel and Aegon and she is the youngest twin of Momoe! She is quite similar to her sister in the sense that they are both sweet and silly. She is the daughter almost everyone wants - the perfect lady. She is multi-talented and knows many things: fighting multiple languages, painting, drawing etc. Unlike her elder siblings who are already married, she does not wish to get married at all. 

Alhaitham Targaryen is the eldest of the triplets and is the 5th child of Aemond, Aegon and Jaxrel. While his siblings are chaotic, he is a huge sweetheart who jokes around and is always trying to learn new things. He is always munching on snacks which usually gets a scolding from  his Grandmother.

Nemesis Targaryen is the second sibling of the triplets and is the 6th child of Aemond, Aegon and Jaxrel. He's the most energetic person in the family, even more so then his elder sister. He is always travelling to different countries and playing pranks when he is home. He has a big sweet tooth and steals his older brother’s snack all the time. He is extremely competitive and plays lots of games with his siblings. 

Gemini Targaryen is the third sibling of the triplets and is the 7th child of Aemond, Aegon and Jaxrel. He's also more energetic like his brother and is a very passionate person, adoring even the smallest things in life. He is the life of the party like Jaxrel and a skilled fighter like Aemond. He is incredibly popular because of his looks. He and his siblings are always sneaking out and they got caught by Aegon, who actually sneaked out with him. He is really tall, often banging his head by accident on door frames. 

Family Life:

Family dinners don’t happen often because everyone in the family is always busy doing their own things, but once in a while, they all just sit down together and enjoy each other's company. The triplets are almost never there and when they are, they don’t even eat because they have already stuffed themselves with snacks. 

Gemini is the tallest in the family while Momo is the shortest. They have a really silly relationship. They tease one another, but in a good way and are alway trying to help one another. I feel like they have the strongest relationships among the siblings. Kind of like Benedict and Eloise’s relationship 

Everytime one of them have a new lover, the family analyzes the fuck out of the person to such an extent that it is scary. All of them sit in front of them and ask twenty questions each. Out of the lot, Visenya is the most over protective about her siblings and who they love.

Aemond is such a girl’s dad! He always lets the girls do his hair and rides on Vhagar with them (it usually receives a scolding from Jaxrel) While the parents try to not have favourites, it’s in human nature to prefer something more. Aemond’s favourite is Momoe, Aegon’s favourite is Gemini while Jaxrel’s favourite is Visenya (mainly because she was the first one he ever had and like Cersei said ‘There is no love stronger than the one a mother has for her eldest child’ or something along those lines)

Moonboard:

[paintedscales]

FFXIV Write 2023 :: Day 1

Prompt :: Envoy Characters :: Nomin tal Kheeriin, Kan-E-Senna Word Count :: 867

FFXIV Write 2023 Master List

“I have written a letter to my counterparts in the Eorzean Alliance.” Kan-E-Senna produced an envelope from her robes before walking forward and handing it off to Nomin. Tentatively, the auri took it and gazed down at it for a long moment. Her mind was flooded with questions and overall doubt -- so much so that it was hard to pay attention to the rest of what the Elder Seedseer had to say.

This moment felt entirely so surreal.

Traveling the Steppe as merely a wanderer, to finding her way to Kugane, Nomin had really only come to Eorzea to put greater distance between herself and the Steppe for the safety of her people. To think that she had made enough waves since having been in Gridania that afforded her a private audience with the Elder Seedseer after her collapse at the ceremony was surprising to have said the very least.

“... Nor are we any closer to learning the fate of the Warriors of Light.” Hearing Kan-E-Senna mention the Warriors of Light made Nomin look up from the missive in her hands. Her thoughts had finally cleared enough to remember where she was. The Elder Seedseer herself had her full attention on Nomin. That was enough to make the auri stand a little straighter and at attention.

“Yet so long as we live, never must we give up hope. We owe this to those who laid down their lives that we might behold another dawn. In remembrance of them, a memorial service will soon be held upon the anniversary of the Battle of Carteneau. This missive bears the details of that service.”

Again, Nomin looked down at the envelope. There was this burgeoning sense of doubt and dread at the prospect of being trusted with something so…important. Especially as someone who had not even been in Eorzea all that long. Was she really the correct choice for something like this? To approach those in the Eorzean Alliance as a representative of Gridania and the Elder Seedseer herself?

“You graciously accepted the part of Emissary in the recent ceremony. Should you be so willing, I would now make you my envoy, and have you bear my message to our allies.” The Elder Seedseer’s words only made that stone of self-doubt sink deeper into the pits of Nomin’s stomach.

The people of Gridania had made it clear several times that they did not seem to appreciate Nomin’s presence. For a mercy -- a very, very miniscule mercy -- the Gridanians’ disdain seemed to extend to all outsiders, rather than just her as an au ra. Still, it stung and made Nomin reluctant for a lot. Though she pressed on, and continued doing what she could aside from participating in Timbermaster Beatin’s lessons for the Carpenters’ Guild.

“I…” Nomin started, taking a breath to both calm herself and give her a moment for her mind to formulate a coherent string of words. “Am I really the correct choice for this, Elder Seedseer? I…I just feel like maybe someone that is from Gridania or the Black Shroud as a whole may prove more…acceptable.”

Kan-E-Senna approached Nomin, a warm expression on her face.

“Your dedication to the people of Gridania rouses fond memories in me, and I would choose no other for the role,” Kan-E-Senna reassured. “In the time that you have been here, you’ve selflessly given yourself to the needs of the people, regardless of the task ahead. So please, will you do me this favor?”

“If you’re certain… Then I shall do my best not to disappoint.” Nomin gave a shallow nod at the end of her statement.

“Humbly, I thank you. As you are no doubt aware, our partners in the Eorzean Alliance lie some considerable distance away. Nor are Ul’dah and Limsa Lominsa close to one another. Yet fear not, for I have no intention of subjecting you, mine own newly anointed envoy, to a journey which would take weeks by land.”

Kan-E-Senna motioned for one of her guards to step forward. An elezen woman with tight, brown braids against her head gave a Serpent Salute before producing a pass for Nomin to take. When Nomin held it in her own hands, her mouth fell slightly agape. She could only stare at the pass in disbelief.

“I mean for you to travel by air. Receive of me this airship pass. With it, you may make use of the skyways that connect the three city-states of the Alliance.”

There had been more to Nomin’s audience with Kan-E-Senna, though she had left the Stillglade Fane still feeling that sense of doubt and uncertainty. The fact that it had been revealed that the Elder Seedseer did not make her decision alone in granting Nomin trust left the auri woman with even more questions. Who else had been keeping tabs on her? Was it Mother Miounne? Had it been someone else entirely? Maybe she would have never found out.

Nomin leaned against the airship railing, her attention on the world below as they flew past.

She took in a breath, closing her eyes as she did so.

Was it truly right of her to have accepted this task?

Nomin supposed that only time would tell.

[goldeneyedgirl]

I know you have so many projects to work on, but I was just reading that fic you posted here where alice is kind of a witch (??) and jasper kind of kills her in the end (i forgot the title I'm sorry 😭) and I was thinking about how I think that one version of alice fits so much my idea of highschooler human alice and even the way her relationship with jasper starts. And all of that just to say: how do you picture a completely average human high school version of the cullens? Honestly, even as humans, I don't think that weirdos could ever be average.

Hi Anon!

The Dark and the Unknown! I'm actively working on it as we speak (it's being very difficult).

I absolutely love coming up with ordinary versions of the Cullens so I am obsessed with this question. I think any version of the Cullen family as they are in canon is going to be Weird, but being human makes it a little less obvious.

I will say that for me, one of the defining human-Cullen interpretations has to be Midnight Run by Inthemadhouse (tragically unfinished but one of the best Jalice fics online), so that has probably coloured some of my personal headcanons.

Strap yourself in, it's going to be long.

I'm working from the idea the family are Exactly As Presented in canon: Carlisle and Esme adopted a bunch of teenagers who then promptly hooked up with each other, with Edward being the first adoption, then Emmett, then Alice, and then the acquisition of Esme's twin niece and nephew. Obviously the ages of when they were acquired by Carlisle and Esme have to be fudged a little to make this work.

family stuff.

There is 0 chance that Esme and Carlisle (who I'm estimating are in their 30s because it's highly unlikely they would be approved for that combination of kids in their early 20s) would be paying out of pocket for five Ivy League educations plus dorm and books (approx 300k per student for undergrad). Without hundreds of years to build their wealth, Carlisle and Esme Normal Wealthy, not Batman Villain Wealthy.

I think Esme and Carlisle would want to teach a good work ethic, and set the kids up for success as adults. College would be an unspoken expectation because of white privilege and their wealth, but Esme and Carlisle would also accept a post high school plan that was realistic and researched. I also think Carlisle and Esme would be big on community service and volunteering, and not letting the kids just lie around during the summer.

Esme would have a small office/studio to run her architecture/interiors business out of, and she juggles work with running the household, and tries to give the kids more responsibility now that they're getting older. Carlisle would work long hours, but emphasise the importance of family time when he's off work - one of the reasons they go camping so often.

edward.

Edward is very literary and a bit pretentious. He reads the classics and has strong opinions and thinks that a lot of trends and pop culture is beneath him. He's the one wearing sweater vests and button downs to school - with a leather satchel - and his notebooks are all moleskines.

He thinks he's very artistic and spends a lot of time writing poetry and music for the piano, and pining for someone to understand him. He is insanely self-conscious about his appearance - especially his skin - and kind of awkward around his peers. He's not nearly as religiously coded as a human, but is determined to prove to Carlisle that he was worth the hassle of the adoption.

His best subjects are English Lit, Music, and European History. His co-curricular is probably the school play, where he plays piano. He's a nightmare to drag out of bed in the morning, and he tends to be very bossy with his family because he's been with the Cullens the longest. He's closest to Alice, but I see him actually getting along with Ben, Eric, and Angela at school. I think he'd kind of want to be friends with Jacob but try to be cool about it and come off as a snob. Edward cannot stand Rose or Jasper.

Edward would have been attracted to Bella's standoffish attitude when she arrived; the long-suffering thing is something he understands (he lives with four 'siblings' and only two bathrooms). They bond over classic novels and feeling out of place with their peers and whilst they get a little dramatic, they're very happy with each other.

bella.

We know teenage Bella but if she and Edward were humans together? Oof. Bella is starry-eyed over Edward from Day One, but knows how to hide it - she realizes that would put Edward off pretty fast.

I think Jacob and Bella would be quite close from her arrival in Forks, but Bella would be kind of on the fringes of her social set for all of high school. I also like to think that Jacob has his own friends and girlfriend, and doesn't spend his high school years pining after Bella.

I cannot see Bella and Alice being close friends in an all-human universe because Alice isn't starved for friends in this world, and Bella's got less of a reason to get her on side when immortality isn't the prize. I think they get along and hang out but they just don't have enough in common. I think Bella would irritate the shit out of Rose, getting caught asking too many questions about the family around school.

Bella would absolutely get pregnant before graduation. Edward has less religious hangups plus a contemporary upbringing... yeah, Ness was an accident. But Edward would definitely want to marry Bella before they went to college - I can definitely see Edward turning down Ivy League to stay with Bella at a public university.

emmett.

Emmett is sport like Ken is beach. I feel like Emmett plays two sports every season, probably coaches a kiddie league on the weekends, has a summer boy scout troupe, and works delivering pizzas after school. He loves the outdoors, loves activity. His grades are not great, honestly, but he does his best and he passes. He's definitely the student whispering if anyone did the homework and could he just... have a quick look two minutes before class starts. Emmett's one of those people who just has a lot of friends, though he would claim his best friend is either Edward or Jasper.

He's extremely popular because he's so friendly, and he's the kind of kid that adults go "Emmett Cullen doesn't sleep til noon on a Saturday. He's already coached two first grade basketball games and washed his mom's care by 10am." (Esme would look at them, unamused, and explain that she literally keeps two water jugs in the upstairs bathroom: one to wake up Edward and one to wake up Emmett.)

Emmett is also almost always the source of alcohol at high school parties, and makes the best fake I.Ds in the county. Charlie Swan knows it's Emmett, he just has no tangible proof. Yet.

Emmett has very little trauma due to being adopted, and definitely sees being a Cullen as winning the life lottery. He's the heart and soul of the family, and tends to use that to get out of any serious trouble.

I think that Rose and Jasper probably joined the family around age 12ish, and Emmett was probably smitten with Rose from first sight, and made a bit of a fool of himself and annoyed Rose for a few weeks before he relaxed and was just himself. He was naturally accepting of her boundaries, respectful, and the appropriate amount of protective over her when needed. I actually think Rose and Emmett got together after Alice and Jasper, probably around Freshman year. I know it's common that they are the pair that have the on-again, off-again dramatics, but I don't see it - perfect match. Emmett takes jokes about him dumping Rose for a cheerleader with 0 humor and shoots down any female - or male - that tries to flirt with him.

His best subjects are Gym and Chemistry. He's really easy-going and I can see him opting for a state university close to Rose because she has such strong preferences for her education. He gets along really well with the guys on the Res, hangs out there a lot, and is definitely a big brother figure for Seth after Harry's heart attack. He'd probably want to study something like video game design on a football scholarship in college.

rose.

Rose would not be a popular cheerleader. I need that out there. She has no interest in the social aspect, no interest in the culture of cheerleading, and has tunnel vision about her college plans.

I see Rose having a very type-A high school experience - all her classes are AP or college credit, she volunteers at the hospital in the summer (pediatrics), she runs a study group for STEM subjects because Forks High won't let her start a full-on robotics club, she's a member of the cross country team, and she works after school at Esme's office until she gets a job at a garage. She is utterly humorless about her grades, and she's going to be valedictorian, get into an Ivy League (ideally MIT, but she's flexible) on at least one decent scholarship.

And she makes it all look completely effortless. Meanwhile, she's still got a lot of baggage and trauma from before she joined the Cullen family, she's got a lot of anger, and she's just determined to rise about it without really dealing with it in a healthy way; Esme and Carlisle are terrified she's going to put all this work in, only to burn out before she makes it to college.

She intimidates the shit out of her classmates, and I feel like her closest friends at school would be, like, two other intense overachieving girls. She catches Bella trying to get gossip about the family from other students, and hates her from that moment on because Rose hates feeling like she's not normal. She knows their family is weird, but she wants the world to pretend it isn't.

I think Rose would actually become good friends with Leah Clearwater when she meets them via Emmett, and that she's insanely popular over at the Res with the boys because of her interest and knowledge in cars; between Rose, Jacob, and Sam, there is no car that they cannot get running again. I also think that Rose would stay in touch with Vera throughout their lives.

Rose and Edward hate each other with the fire of a thousand suns; Edward resents that Rose isn't grateful to Esme and Carlisle for taking her in because she should be honored (projecting just a little); Rosalie thinks that Edward is spoiled and has the self-awareness of a shoe-box and resents how treasured he is by the Cullens, but family therapy was just kind of a lot of yelling, so there's a mutual Cold War in the household.

Rose is also the most competent cook out of all the kids, but resents the fuck out of everyone when she's the one that the responsibility of cooking falls to on night's when the kids are cooking. The others learned fast that they had to participate or face her wrath.

Jasper and Rose are close in the way that siblings who have gone through something terrible together are, but their trauma is so different that it's hard for them to always related to the other. Emmett is Rosalie's foundation, her tether, and the person she hears no matter what. To the outsider, she seems like an ice-cold, controlling girlfriend but even when she's researching her college options, she's taking into account Emmett's wants and needs with those decisions. Rose feels so deeply that it makes her vulnerable so she hides it.

jasper.

I feel like before Forks, Jasper would have become very acquainted with drugs to cope with his past, and Carlisle and Esme had to intervene majorly - and that might have been one of the reasons that they decided to relocate the family to Forks. So like, now weed is his one vice to stay calm and get through the day, and he's pretty transparent with Esme, Emmett, and Alice about his smoking because of his previous addiction.

Jasper would be very quiet, and kind of just loom behind Alice at all times - I think 90% of the time, he'd have earbuds in. But he'd have a nasty temper and would definitely get into more than one fight, especially if someone said anything negative about Rose or Alice. And Jasper doesn't pick fights he won't win. He's kind of seen as the problem child of the family by the local gossips, even though Charlie Swan thinks that Jasper's a hell of a lot less trouble than Emmett. Charlie is, of course, totally incorrect as Jasper is the co-conspirer behind the fake I.D.s Emmett supplies, and has supplied a few parties with weed when he's feeling generous.

He absolutely got blackout drunk at a few parties before he quit drinking. He's kind of a sad and angry drunk, so it was for the best.

Jasper pretty much attached himself to Alice from his first day in the Cullen house, and they were definitely the first two to get together - Jasper has simped for Alice since he was 12, and has no plans to stop at any point. She's his favourite person, his best friend, and he's happy when she's happy, so he'll go to Homecoming, to the Winter Ball, to Spring Fling, Prom, anything to make her smile. He'll attend the school play every night because Alice designed the costumes.

At school, Jasper is the perpetual 'so smart, knows the material, puts 0 effort in'; he loves arguing with his teachers, and can turn a class into a three ring circus with minimal effort, but likes to save that for a couple of times a semester. He's the kind of asshole who shows up to finals, gets a perfect score, but hasn't handed in a single piece of homework. He's not really big on making friends, but he kind of does peripherally through Emmett and Alice. He'd argue his best friend is Peter, and they stay in touch for life. But he and Emmett get along great and are as close as bio brothers (even if Emmett cheerfully threatened to beat the shit out of him the first time he got caught with his hand up Alice's shirt.) Jasper definitely goes surfing at La Push and considers it meditative.

He and Edward have a frustrating relationship because of how much attention Jasper's struggles got him from Carlisle and Esme; Edward was jealous of how easily Carlisle told Jasper he was proud of him, and how Jasper was standoffish to Carlisle when he'd just been given the thing Edward craves more than anything. Carlisle also has an interest in history, and he and Jasper have long discussions about that together. Jasper finds Edward immature and spoiled but tries to keep the peace for Alice's sake.

He's most interested in American History and Technology. His co-curricular would be AV Club, but he really only shows up when they're pitching in for the school play. I definitely see Esme and Carlisle insisting he gets a job during the summer, and it would be something like helping run movies in the park during the summer, or working at the Forks Historical Society on Saturdays. He has no real plans for college, but I can see Jasper being one of those assholes who just gets a full ride to a really good school for reasons that are a mystery to everyone else.

alice.

Alice would be the most noticeable weirdo; I can see Alice being an Art Kid, and joining the school play just to design and make costumes, plus she wears a lot of homemade and customized clothing to school, as well as detailed make-up. But she's definitely up for joining clubs and socialising; I can't see her being a cheerleader because of the time commitment, but maybe doing ballet or gymnastics. Maybe a language club? And a photography club?

She's one of those people that just considers everyone a friend; I wouldn't be surprised if Esme and Carlisle had meetings to be like "no, Alice isn't ADHD. She's been tested, she's just high energy." I think she gets along really well with Jessica, kind of overwhelms Angela, and has a kind of Cold War of politeness going with Lauren. She's really welcoming to Bella and enthusiastic about her and Edward, but they don't have a ton in common so it's the odd movie night/sleepover when Bella's over at the Cullens.

Alice would be the peace-keeper between Edward and Rose and Jasper because she can translate Edward's dramatics into something tolerable for the others. She and Rose aren't super close, but they get along okay, and go shopping together often. Alice and Emmett probably have the most traditionally typical brother-sister relationship.

Alice seems a lot more innocent than she is, and that's partially her lack of memories from her childhood. She's very, very protective of Jasper in a subtle way; if he's drinking or getting high, she's staying by his side stone-cold sober, and she's definitely started at least one fight when someone said something about Jasper's scars. I think she'd have a lot of guilt over not being able to help Jasper with his addictions more than she did, even though she was a kid.

She's also the financial manager of Jasper and Emmett's little I.D. enterprise, and is definitely the sneakiest in the family - I think Alice would have a klepto streak as a human, and definitely be the one that knew her way around a lock-pick.

Her best classes would be Art, Economics, and maybe Forensics? She'd have no interest in English Lit or Sciences, but she'd get okay marks across the board - she's highly motivated if Carlisle is offering to pay them for As. She'd be looking at Parsons, Pratt, or RISD for college; maybe NYU. She'd have numerous jobs because Forks doesn't really have the kind of stores she'd aspire to work in, but I figure she negotiates selling accessories online with Carlisle and Esme instead of a traditional job. She'd volunteer to work on all the elementary school, middle school, and church plays.

--

I thin that's everything? I hope that's what you were looking for anon, but I had such a good time thinking about all this!

[gracey17]

Exceptional Mechanical Engineering Class Experience – Worth Every Penny!

I recently enrolled in a Mechanical Engineering class and was initially overwhelmed by the coursework and tight schedule. As I was searching for online assistance, now I can  pay someone to take my Mechanical Engineering class and After completing the course with their support, I can confidently say it was a fantastic experience that exceeded my expectations.

From the start, the process of enrolling and getting assistance was smooth and straightforward. The website's user-friendly interface made it easy to navigate and find the specific services I needed. What stood out the most was the professionalism and expertise of the tutors who guided me through the entire course.

One of the key highlights was the personalized attention I received. The tutors at [Website Name] were not just knowledgeable in Mechanical Engineering; they were also excellent educators who understood the nuances of online learning. They provided clear explanations, valuable insights, and were always available to address my queries promptly.

The quality of the coursework assistance was exceptional. The tutors demonstrated a profound understanding of the subject matter, ensuring that I grasped each concept thoroughly. The assignments and projects were not only completed on time but also showcased a high level of proficiency and attention to detail.

I was initially hesitant about the idea of paying someone to take my Mechanical Engineering class, but proved to be a worthwhile investment. The improvement in my grades was noticeable, and I gained a deeper understanding of the subject matter, which would have been challenging to achieve on my own given my busy schedule.

Additionally,  they maintained a high level of confidentiality and security throughout the entire process. I felt reassured knowing that my academic endeavors were in trustworthy hands.

In conclusion, if you find yourself struggling with your Mechanical Engineering class and are contemplating the option of paying someone to take my class, I wholeheartedly recommend . The exceptional support, expertise, and professionalism exhibited by their tutors made my learning journey not only manageable but truly enjoyable. I am grateful for the positive impact they had on my academic success.

[wilted--chamomile]

Velour of Velveteen Vanities is a manipulative abuser and a scammerˏˋ°•*⁀➷

I’m not using a quirk because I want this to be seen by everyone, please share this around as much as you can.

My name is Veruco Miopah, and I am a victim of Velour’s manipulations. I don’t think I am the only troll who has been deceived by his two-faced ways either. I have been a fan of the Velveteen Vanities channel for the past four sweeps, and he has been a comfort creator of mine ever since I watched that video about his iconic Starbucks story. I’ve spent over 10000 caegars on him in total to prove that I WAS a dedicated fan, which includes numerous dates with him (detailed below), but DOES NOT include being the one of the highest tier patrons to his patreon (100 caegars/perigee) which gave me access to his supporters-only Discord channel and the ability to join Discord calls with him and the other 100 caegar patrons. Velour would only arrange these calls once every three perigees, claiming he was ‘’’too busy’’’ to chat with his fans for an hour. Apparently he was not too busy to be going on other paid dates and appearing on other people’s YouTube channels tho!!!!!!

Velour’s YouTube channel was my life. I never had a lot of friends, so I turned to watching YouTubers for comfort. I know it’s stupid and sad now, but when I watched Velour’s videos, I felt like he could be my friend too. On camera, he is so positive and kind, it’s no surprise everyone seems to fall in love with him. And... I did. I was in love with this fake personality who REALLY only wanted money from me and all of his other fans. But now my eyes are open, and everyone else needs to open their eyes too.

As you all know, Velour offers a “Paid Requests” service on his online store, where he says he will do anything for you if you can name your price. I started off small, wanting autographs and personalised letters from him, and they always came promptly and were written with a real love for the person ordering them. I then became hooked, and one option caught my eye: You can pay to go out on a date with him. It was very expensive, yes, but I was starstruck so I didn’t care. I could go on a date with the man I loved! So of course I had to try it out. 

I should have known he didn’t care about me when we discussed the date in full detail before going out, it was very methodical and seemed like he really wanted to cover his a**. The date itself was fine, wonderful even. He was just as kind as he was on camera, very attentive to my needs, and he gave me a hug like I paid for him to do. I was hooked, and could not wait to see him again on my second date.

That’s when the prices started to rise.

You would think that meeting someone in person and getting to know them would make you a known loyal customer, and I was! I bought and wore his merch (which he complimented me on and suggested other accessories I could also purchase!!), I was an active member of his servers and replied to his tweets often, and he knew me by name. But instead, the prices for dates started to double. It was obvious he was just trying to leech as much money out of me as possible, but I was smitten. He took advantage of my love and kept dangling the possibility that one night we could become official in front of me. He knew EXACTLY what he was doing and he didn’t care, because all he cares about is getting paid.

We went on five dates in total, and on the fifth date he broke my heart. I finally confessed my love for him and poured out all my heart, and he violently rejected me. He suddenly became very cold and very angry, stating that this is “not how this works”, as if I’m not supposed to expect a relationship from someone I have gone on MULTIPLE dates with. As if I’m supposed to be able to control how my heart feels!!! He wouldn’t hear my side of the story at all, and all he cared about was what I had paid for with ZERO regard for my feelings. I was crying, and when I wanted for just a bit of sympathy he stormed off because I didn’t want to pay him for another hug. He left me alone in the cold, while he probably went off to scam money out of some other poor, lonely soul. 

He played with my heart, and he’s no doubt playing with all your hearts too. But it took me over 10000 caegars to finally see his true colours. You can all thank me for giving this to you for free!!!!

I’m disgusted that this man has been able to manipulate me and so many other vulnerable trolls’ hearts for so long. He builds you up and makes you feel like you’re special, but then never gives you anything in return. He takes advantage of you being his loyal fan by tricking you into paying extra for his services, and EVERYTHING costs money. A hug, a kiss on the cheek, holding hands, playing with his hair, even just a basic hi-five. I bet he’d make you pay to see his smile if he could get away with it. 

I know I am not the only victim of this vile excuse of a man, and I encourage everyone who has ever been scammed or manipulated by him to also come forward.

Stop giving Velour your money. Stop watching his videos. Stop buying his clothing, and for the love of Her Imperious Condescension stop going on dates with him. He doesn’t care about you, he doesn’t care about any of his fans. He’ll lead you on and act like a Prince Charming, and then steal as much money from you as possible. He targets vulnerable trolls like me who are lonely and looking for some attention, and he’ll two-time as many women (and men) as he pleases). DO NOT give him any more attention or you WILL become his victim too.

Please also boycott the following YouTube channels, businesses, and trolls who openly support and defend him: BIFFSVOO Gaming & Aiolos’ Twitch channel (GonePostal), Cavius Hair and Beauty, Aeon Racing F1 Team, SkillShare, NordVPN, Squarespace, Audible, Honey, and Viltau Espino (Event organiser, Velour supplies his uniforms and costumes). 

I wanted to be merciful and allow all of you to publicly announce your separation from Velveteen Vanities, but SOMEONE hacked into my system and is causing me too much trouble, so I CANNOT sit on this any longer. If I find out who did it, I WILL be reporting you to the authorities for sabotage. 

!!! PLEASE SPREAD THE WORD AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE !!!

[toxxxic-mess]

Mini-Rant

Incase it’s not obvious, or you didn’t read pinned post, I am not dominant. I hate being dominant and being asked to “control” you is not going to happen.

While I am happy to make you worse, it will be from a POV of a creepy perverted beta loser, because that’s what I am. I want to get creepier and more of a loser with you, not dominate you. Calling me Sir will outright stop conversation dead in the tracks. And that’s fine if you don’t want a loser to goon and get worse with, and want a strong dominant master to obey. We all what we want, and we can find what we’re all after on here somewhere. But don’t try and force someone to be what they’re not. Find someone who is what you’re after.

Sometimes, I’ll throw a curve ball if I’m on the fence when someone begs. Some people pass, and generally these people are fun to talk to. Some people fail, and the ones I continue to briefly talk to are as dull as I imagined they’d be. I’ve just had a follower beg with the any question line, then when they failed, complained about it. When gave them subtle humiliation they wrote a wall of abusive text because what I was giving them wasn’t what they had imagined asking me to control and humiliate them would be like in their head and calling it all bullshit. You may not like this, but I’m here to goon too, not cater to your imagination of how being a controlled slave would be. Ironically their pinned post is about how they refuse to pay for the service they want to be personally catered to 100% of their fantasy.

Anyway; because I got a wall of abuse, I thought I might explain WHY I do/ask certain things, even though explaining it makes it obvious what the answer is.

A) You message me saying “Please ask me ANYTHING”

I respond “Explain to me how the Observer Effect works in quantum physics when particles aren’t sentient so don’t know when they’re being watched.”

Obviously I don’t care about the answer. I just want to see how you respond when you’re giving me free reign but don’t like the outcome. But also, it’s a task without you you realising it’s a task. Even people who are ’just’ smart don’t understand quantum physics. Let alone average people or dumb people. So you’re going to have to look it up most likely. Then, you have two choices. You can copy and paste the first thing you find. Also known as doing the bare minimum approach. You do this, you’re boring. Go away. You can try your best to explain it. It’s still not what I’m after, but you at leat tried. Bonus points for pointing out sentience has nothing to do with it. You were set a task, and you may not have liked it but you did it anyway. Shows promise for the perverted tasks I will set. I’ll happily talk to you. Or, you can go the third option, and point out you’re way too stupid to ever know anything about that, you’re too brain dead to even spell any of it. It’s why I like to ask this to self proclaimed bimbos, like the person who got annoyed at me blowing him off for copy pasting an answer. If you’re a bimbo, prove it. Be all “OMg liek I dunno wat that even means?? That stuffs totes hard and like the only hard stuff I like is fun stuff like cock *giggle* At least that stuff sould get cute guys, that wheel chair guy is fugly!!!” Or tell me you were too busy staring at girls in class to concentrate. Bring it around to gooning. That’s the best option and I will 100% make you a worse person.

B) You message me saying “Please, I’ll do ANYTHING”

I respond “Start getting fit and working out. 20 squats, push ups and sit ups each day along with a 1K run. Daily.”

Same as when you gave me free reign to ask anything, how you respond to being told to do something you weren’t expecting shows whether you’re gonna be interesting to talk to or not. You could whine and say that’s not what you meant. If you’re going to whine being told to do something on first interaction that isn’t going to humiliate you, then what are you going to do if you do get told to do something humiliating. And if you do it, who says it won’t BECOME humiliating? Once I know you’re fit, maybe I’ll get you dressed in pink yoga pants and sports bra and get you doing Pilates with the hot girls down the gym. If if you’re a pain slut, I’ll turn your regime into torture, making you do obscene amount of exercise with no food or sleep until you’re not fit but a skinny withered runt any girl could beat up. Just because you can’t see the humiliation yet doesn’t mean it won’t come. But if you want to be controlled then question it as soon as you get an order then what’s the point? And again, there’s the third option of saying you tried but you got scared by all the alpha girls taking their insta selfies and you end up making a mess in public and go back home to jerk to how cute they were. You’re a loser act like it, not a petulant child.

C) You beg for something humiliating at least.

You’ve worn me down and I give you something simple and humiliating. Being worn down isn’t fun though so don’t expect any effort. This is your last ditch attempt. I tell you to go buy pair of panties. It’s simple. It’s cheap. And it’s humiliating. Anyone can do it. So if you don’t, or you say you’ll do it later, can you have another task, or you pretend you did it, good bye. Sorry but I have a lot of fun losers to talk to, especially when people from old blogs re-find me. I like to spend decent time gooning with each of them. If you’re gonna waste time, then I’m not getting involved.

Sorry if got bit ranty, this was supposed to be short, but having a “submissive loser” swear and act like an incel cunt because I wont vocalise his inner fantasies like he wants because he won’t pay a femdom to do that for him has irked me.

So here’s some super hot dominant ladies I hope you all enjoy

[paulk19]

Proud to Be a Highlander!

I’m privileged to live in one of the best public school districts, both in New York State and in the entire country.  In the 2021-22 state standardized testing, Herricks placed sixth in English Language Arts and seventh in Mathematics out of 686 districts for grades 3-8.  In grade 8 Math (Algebra) it ranked FIRST.  Way to go, Herricks!  I’m proud to say that I am a product of that school system.  I graduated many years ago, it’s true, but the schools were excellent even then. Reading the recent newsletter, I believe the district has upped its game even more.

I can’t help but reflect on what has made Herricks Public Schools so good for so long.  It’s driven by many interdependent factors: motivated students, devoted faculty and administration, involved parents, great facilities and resources, and effective communication with and by all stakeholders.  Of course, none of this comes cheaply.  Our school tax levy is roughly twice what we pay for all other town and county services combined.  We pay the tax gladly, as our contribution to keeping this tradition of excellence going strong.  While funding alone cannot provide or ensure a top-notch education, a top-notch education cannot be provided without adequate funding.

One of my pet peeves is when I hear someone say, “I don’t have children in school, why should I have to pay?”  My former neighbor used to spew this nonsense regularly, and we got into several arguments over it.  Already, American education lags behind that of most of the developed world, with China and India catching up fast.  If the United States has any hope of remaining an economic superpower, then we need to leave these ignorant viewpoints behind and start moving toward a world-class educational system that is forward-looking, student-centric, and devoid of culture wars fought by the extremists on both sides.  These are abstractions, and often prove to be unconvincing debate points.

The best counterpoint to the “why should I pay” complaint is that good schools boost property values.  If you want your house to command a good price, then support your district.  I guarantee that if our schools here deteriorated, home prices would soon follow suit.  That can be seen in other parts of Nassau County.  Those complaining about the Herricks tax bill now would really have something to gripe about then.  Or how about when YOUR kids were in school, others supported them even though their children had already graduated, or perhaps they had had no children at all.  Pay it forward, bro!

It’s more than just dollars and cents, though.  We all benefit from living in an educated society.  Study after study has shown that a strong educational system can have societal benefits far beyond economics.  Reducing crime, equalizing opportunity, and promoting understanding across diverse social groups are a few that immediately come to mind.  Americans talk a good game when it comes to education; it’s time to put some substance behind it, like we do here at Herricks.

[dankusner]

Ignoring appraisal letters could prove costly

Some people get mail from a company that offers to place a homestead exemption on their primary property to save tax money.

I’ve warned to avoid companies in the past that charge for this free service.

This year, thousands of Texans are getting letters from their appraisal district warning they could lose their homestead exemption because their Texas driver’s license or state ID card doesn’t match the address on their primary property.

This is no scam.

A homestead exemption is a huge tax break designed to lower the taxable value of a property.

Most will never get the letter, but those whose address on a driver’s license or state ID card doesn’t match their primary appraised property eventually will.

The Watchdog worries that receivers of these notes won’t pay attention.

Under a new state law, every one of the state’s appraisal districts must audit its homestead discounts.

Letters get mailed out, and if the ID doesn’t match the property address, recipients must mail in a copy of their ID.

If they don’t and lose their exemptions, their property taxes will jump by hundreds and even thousands of dollars.

I worry that low-income neighborhoods will feel the brunt of this new law.

The letters are written in legal language.

Plus, I am upset that the letters are not going out in Spanish or Vietnamese, only English.

“There’s going to be collateral damage,” property tax consultant Glenn Goodrich says.

Are you affected?

If the address on your driver’s license or state ID doesn’t match your primary address for tax appraisal purposes, you need to update your card if it has expired.

I’m sure some people are confused.

These letters are new under a 2023 state law.

If you’re not sure of your status, check your account on your appraisal district’s website.

Or call the district.

What amazes me is how much money some people who don’t take this seriously are going to lose.

For instance, they’ll lose the massive discount on the school property tax that raised the exemption last year from $40,000 to $100,000.

Losing $100,000 off your taxable value is a huge hit.

Seniors and the disabled could lose their discount and, worse, their frozen taxes.

And some, like Dallas ISD taxpayers, would lose the extra 20% they are able to deduct from their value now.

If someone ignores these letters, under law, they can come back and get a refund for overpaying for the past two years.

But who wants that hassle?

Every appraisal district can do this differently.

In Tarrant County, the warning letters went out earlier this year.

In Dallas, some owners told me they received the letters a few weeks ago.

The goal of this new auditing system is to find fraud.

It’s estimated the state could recoup billions of dollars in lost tax revenue because of those who don’t pay their fair share.

Another estimate is that only 1% of exemption claimers face this.

But that’s a lot when you count the number of property owners.

If you get one of these letters, it’s a request of proof and an invitation to reapply for your exemption.

This is a huge change from the previous practice where you filed for your homestead exemption once and that was that.

Now appraisal districts are doing these audits or hiring outside companies.

Every property should be audited at least once every five years under the new law.

In Tarrant County, 14,000 warning letters were mailed and 7,500 have responded so far.

The bad news is that 2,200 have not responded at all and are in danger of cancellation, Chief Appraiser Joe Don Bobbitt told The Watchdog.

In Dallas, there are 580,000 exemptions with about 19,000 owners who were red-flagged this year so far in the most recent audit.

That’s the highest number of reapply letters sent out by the Dallas Central Appraisal District since 2021.

The Dallas Central Appraisal District uses various techniques to check for matching addresses.

They include death records and websites like Lexis-Nexis and PublicData.com.

https://login.publicdata.com

Undeliverable mail without a forwarding notice also gets red-flagged.

Those targeted get several warning letters.

State Sen. Paul Bettencourt, R-Houston, who wrote most of the new tax law, told me the law is a one-page “concept bill��� whose specific details will be ironed out in the 2025 Texas Legislature.

He called the prevention of fraud “a worthy goal.”

One more worry.

As NBC5 investigative reporter Scott Friedman reported recently, the wait for an appointment for a driver’s license at Department of Public

Safety offices is ridiculously long.

[nahalism]

im a diff anon but i wana jump off of that question you got if thats ok. yknow when it comes to all the mental health world would you personally trust a therapist to help you and to know better what is going on inside you? or do you hmm reject the dsm type of diagnoses and approach your ”issues” from a diff angle

(also potentially v controversial not sure if you were ever asked but do you believe personality disorders as we call and group them now do exist?)

heyy, i love these questions! — firstly, i dont reject the dsm, but i do think its limited in the same way that scientific approaches usually are when they attempt to understand and define the world through logical, evidentiary stances, without making room for aspects of existence that are felt but perhaps intangible, & are thus seemingly unprovable. i like to look at things more holistically, so find myself aligning most with traditional approaches to healing, not because i dont rate science, but because i like to lead with spirit and see how science proves it. the maths always ends up mathsing.

as for therapy, i respect good therapists and the notion of therapy. i think its a shame we dont give reverence to community, wise people, and to elders, because they were the original therapists. however in the modern world therapy has its place. i think its a useful supplement to facilitate our own inner work, mostly because i can see how in instances where someone doesnt have a clue where to begin or has reached an impasse / began to plateau, it could be a great starting point to get perspective or gain self awareness. ——— however, its not something that ive found life changing, useful as a longterm solution, nor realistic relative to the cost of each session. most therapists run their business like entrepreneurs and worse yet like a subscription service. ive always felt like if i have a problem that im paying to resolve, it should be resolved, not be a 'forever in process of being fixed' situation. i think the dynamic of 'person with knowledge' vs 'person in need of being fixed' is an issue in itself, and it relays to the business model that im referencing which, much like allopathic medicine, relies on its patients being unwell. to cure the patient is to be out of business... ima leave that there.

*side note. im not saying therapists shouldnt charge for their expertise, because they should. i am also aware that for as long as i live there will be room for healing and refinement, & so the process of working with a therapist could be on going. — however, i believe that the work being done alongside a therapist is meant to be a means to an end (the end being self regulation). i also, unfortunately, feel like every pro has a con. the pro and con being the fact therapists are impartial and often times not directly rooted in the communities of the individuals they serve. whilst that can make people more comfortable in coming forward and confiding those details that usually lead them to be judged and not asked for help, it also means that people can make use of the service as means to trauma dump, tell unreliable versions of events in a bid to be validated, and as such substitute self tutelage and understanding for enabling / codependency.

so yh. regarding personality disorders, i dont see them the way that a lot of people might. till humanity at large changes the way we relate to and function in the world around us, i dont think we will see a decline in the rates of those personality traits persisting. we often point the finger at these individuals as if they are the problem, but problems cannot survive or form in isolation. — i recognise that personality disorders are challenging to correct and work with. i also recognise that they require a level of self awareness and willingness to change that can be difficult to develop with such trauma responses, usually because confronting the trauma that caused the disorder feels like literal death, and because the ptsd holding it in place makes the stillness required to recognise there is a problem that needs solving hard, let alone finding the capacity and maturity required to actually heal it. — however, i do know that if the person is willing to do the work, there isnt a dis-order that love, patience, and the belief of others and in your self cannot cure. does that mean we should throw ourselves into the path of individuals still on their healing journey? no. does that mean we should take it upon ourselves to suffer at the consequence of the disorder in a bid to 'heal people'? absolutely not. but it doesnt mean we should write off those individuals either.

i know that was long and wordy but hopefully it answered your questions <3. love