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Genderbender of the two main HotD divas—Otto and Daemon 😁💙

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LOSING MY SHIT WE'RE GETTING HARVEY BACK

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#She Fell First But He Definitely Fell Harder

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you ever look at a girl n think how the fuck are you that pretty

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since im on a roll about tragedies:

i am sick to death of fourth wall breaks that are funny. i want fourth wall breaks that make me want to cry.

give me hamlet looking up during his monologue to see the audience and plead with them for help. give me orpheus, on the road back up from the underworld begging us to make sure eurydice is there, to tell him she is safe. give me orpheus turning when the audience stays silent.

give me someone, bloody and full of tears monologuing to the camera when the narrative has wound itself so tight that they can't escape it anymore.

"youre just watching me. help me. im dying and im rotting and im losing myself and you wont do a thing."

i want the tragedy to be the performance. i want the tragedy to be, truly, in the eyes of the beholder.

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WEDDINGS

So I collated some info on Westerosi Weddings for all your fanfic needs :) note: fanfic is a creative writing you can do as you please!

Faith of the Seven

Officiated by a Septon (Standing between statues of the Mother and Father) and typically held in a Sept.

The ceremony begins with the Septon reciting some prayers/sermon(s) from the Seven Pointed Star.

Then the Bride is led into the Sept and down the aisle typically by a male relative and silently presented to the Groom.

 "You may now cloak the bride and bring her under your protection." 

The Groom then removes the Brides ‘Maidens Cloak’ bearing the sigil of her birth house and is replaced by a cloak’ of the Groom’s house signifying the Groom taking over the protection of the Bride.

 "My lords, my ladies, we stand here in the sight of gods and men to witness the union of man and wife. One flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever."

The couple holds hands as the Septon ties a ribbon in a knot around their hands whilst saying:

"Let it be known that [Names and Houses of the bride and groom] are one heart, one flesh, one soul. Cursed be he who would seek to tear them asunder." 

The Septon then announces: 

"In the sight of the Seven, I hereby seal these two souls, binding them as one for eternity."

The Septon then unties the ribbon.

"Look upon each other and say the words"

The couple then simultaneously recite the Seven: 

“Father, Smith, Warrior, Mother, Maiden, Crone, Stranger. I am his/her and he/she is Mine. From this day until the end of my days.”

Following the the Groom says:

“With this kiss, I pledge my love”

The Groom kisses the Bride and they then turn to face the congregation.

Old Gods

A much shorter ceremony than that of the Seven, it usually takes place at night before a Weirwood tree so the wedding can be seen by the gods.

The Bride is led to the Groom waiting before the Weirwood by a male relative. The ceremony is officiated by the Head of the Grooms house ( It is unclear if it is only male heads of houses can officiate however there is no clergy for the Old Gods )

I am going to show the vows in a loose transcript format; please note whom is speaking when.

Officiator (O): Who comes before the Old Gods this night?

Male relative of the Bride (MB):  X of the House X,comes here to be wed. A woman grown,trueborn and noble. She comes to beg the blessing of the Gods. Who comes to claim her?

Groom (G): Y of the House Y. (insert inheritance here if relevant) Who gives her?

MB: Z of the House Z, Statement of relativity to the Bride e.g. Father

O: X, Will you take this man?

Bride (B): I take this man.

The couple then join hands and kneel before the Weirwood in momentary silent prayer.

Valyrian

It is much harder to find any information on Valyrian Weddings however we can kinda piece it together. It can be officiated by anyone however I believe the officiant must have some Valyrian blood. The rites from the show are said simultaneously to the Bride and Groom using a blade (probably Dragonglass/Obsidian however I imagine Valyrian steel is also viable) to first cut each others bottom lips and then they use the blood to draw the symbols of ‘Fire’ or ‘Blood’ on their foreheads. They then cut each other’s palm and let the blood flow into a chalice and then they both drink from it.

The rites are as follows in Valyrian with English translation: 

Hen lantoti ānogar/Blood of two

Va sȳndroti vāedroma/Joined as one

Mēro perzot gīhoti/Ghostly flame

Elēdroma iārza sīr/And song of shadows

Izulī ampā perzī/Two hearts as embers

Prūmī lanti sēteksi/Forged in Fourteen fires

Hen jenȳ māzīlarion/A future promised in glass

Qēnlossa ozūndessi/The stars stand as witness

Sȳndroro ōñō jēdo/The vow spoken through time

Rȳ kīva mazvestraksi/Of darkness and light

Bedding Ceremony

The bedding ceremony is seen throughout Westeros as a cultural tradition not limited to a certain faith. Many couples do not perform this; I haven’t  found evidence this was used in Royal Marriages. Sometimes a bloodied sheet will be presented the morning after the wedding however it is common knowledge that women can bleed from horse riding and so is not traditional.

The bedding ceremony if performed happens at the end of the wedding feast in which male guests will escort the bride to the marital chambers whilst stripping her and making crude jokes, the same is done to the groom with female guests.

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Targ stans who go on and on about "The blood of Old Valyria" and "filthy Andal blood and traditions" always manage to baffle me when they start talking about religion in Westeros.

Like, High Valyrians with their Valyrian Gods partaked in human sacrifice, human experiments, unimaginable types of torture, slavery, eugenics, all types of familial incest and were basically fantasy nazis in their society built upon the enslavement and forced hard labor of the races they saw as "lesser" but clearly, the evilest religion is the one where people pray to the humanoid aspects of their God and read their bejeweled little book.

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Crowns of the Targaryen Dynasty

By Jota Saraiva

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septa rhaena & baelor inspired by st. catherine of siena at the wound of christ

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I truly am my parents' child.

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( <= green bean

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maybe the real accurate adaption of pjo was and ever will be the intricately planned out movies we imagined and directed in our heads while reading the books......

and maybe that's the only adaptation we'll ever need....