#broccoli is the BEST VEGGIE
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effervescentdragon · 6 months ago
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Akira I temd to support your opinions but what is this broccoli apologist bullshit on my dashboard?! broccoli is not it and the youth deserve to know!! 🚫🥦
JAY?!?!?! YOU'VE FALLEN TO THE PROPAGANDA NOOOOOO
when i eat broccoli i pretend i am a giant dragon and im eating little trees and i feel better immediately
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stealingyourbones · 4 months ago
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Never will I stop with the steadfast notion that folks in the DPXDC fandom should interact with at least some form of canon DC media.
There are comics, tv shows, radio dramas both old and new, podcasts, movies, magazines, so much shit that intentionally avoiding the media is simply preventing yourself from spawning new ideas and gaining a new appreciation for a fandom that you’re already in.
The Superman Radio Show has episodes 11 minutes long. A lot of the TV shows don’t have episodes that surpass 30 minutes and most are nearly fully clipped on the official DC YouTube channel. The amount of fan made motion comics is astounding. The amount of fanmade animations is equally as incredible.
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machinegrl · 8 months ago
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house upgrade ✔ broccolis !? + snail !! 🥦🐌 trash hat acquired ✔
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instantezra · 5 months ago
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so upsetting to hear that Dan Avidan needs to be cancelled Again 😔😔😔 (he hates my favorite vegetable)
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thecryptidwizard · 1 year ago
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waiting for my peppercorn cauliflower to finish baking ^-^
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birds eye veggies I LOVVEEE YEEWWWWWWWW
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every time i eat broccoli it’s like i’m discovering it for the first time like damn i’m lovin it can’t get enough of this
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thelastspeecher · 2 years ago
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btw tonight the roommate and I made ratatouille soup and by gum was it worth seeking out the Fancy Canned Tomatoes and also waiting for the Hy-Vee staff to restock the eggplant
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narutomaki · 2 months ago
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only problem with cooking from the heart is I will make something new and will like it sooooooo so so fucking much and know I will get it wrong the next time and disappoint only myself
#i got an immersion blender from a friend and made Green Slop (boiled broccoli cauliflower bok choy and green cabbage)#flavoured it with dill salt garlic powder and some seasame thai salad dressing and oh my gooooood it was so good#it was also like. 2 servings if veggies in 1/2 cup lmao. my math could be off bcus i onky measured out. 1 cup. of. veggies.#the rest was my Hand. could have been anywhete from 2 cups to 3 in that pot bcus it fits like. up to 8 cups of water and i could barely stir#any way. best gift ever.#i struggle to cook actually nutrient dense meals because like. oh my god the effort into making frozen vegtabkes taste good.#and the fucling cost of fresh ones?#and i despise the texture of most boiled and steamed veggies unless theyre to the point where it may as well be mush ANY WAY#and at the poiny its unappetizing bcus its mush ykwim?#any way. Green Slop is much more appealing to me then Green Much#bcus as a kid wed have slop for dinner (leftover meat and veggies from the week reheated in the oven tossed in a bowl of fresh mashed#potatoes and packaged gravy. it was GOOD. GOD. ESPECIALLY AROUND THE HOLIDAYS. WHEN THERE WAS STUFFING ON THE SIDE OR IN THERE IF#IF YOU WERE A FREAK (ME)#what a wild thing to miss. any way. my mum called it slop bcus my grandma called it slop bcus my grandma was raised on a pig farm.#afaik...#or as far as i remember i should say. 🤔 it may have been a different grand or great granparent#not my grandfather tho.#any way. family history tome is over. i have to shower.
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starb0n3 · 2 months ago
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TEEN IN A TIM BURTON MOVIE DIET 🦴🌫️
(inspired by @honeysugarfree)
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.˚⊹.🎃₊˚𖦹⋆
You wake up with one thing on your mind: going out for a walk in the woods. But you can’t. You’re a teenager who has school, and your parents would kill you if you skipped school.
It’s too early to eat anything. Pass the time playing with your cat or simply reading by the window as the sun rises.
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School is so boring when all you’re craving is a nice cup of warm soup or hot chocolate prepared by your mum. Whatever, you’ll suffer in silence and snack on whatever fruits you threw into your bag this morning.✧˖°.☾
For lunch, you’ll have leftovers from yesterday. roasted/baked/boiled veggies accompanied by rice or wheat. you don’t eat it all; it’s cold, and not that nice at all… Maybe your parents packed you a sandwich instead? make sure you don’t eat the crusts, though. they’re the worst part.
If you’re lucky, you might’ve even added one of your bakes as dessert (low cal pastry/cookie), or a small yoghurt. if you didn’t, don’t fret. your parent didn’t forget to include a fruit or veggie for health.
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(¬ ´ཀ` )¬
Back home at last — not before you went on a small walk, though. your parents were worried about where you’d gone off too again, and you’re greeted by a warm broth/soup, or some more baked veggies.
you don’t finish your plate unless your walk was very tiring. you’re too eager to finish that book you started!
Once in a while, you might be allowed a piece of cake or some hot chocolate. not everyday, though. that would be bad for your teeth!
End the day with a cup of tea, reading under a warm blanket with a piece of your favourite chocolate or sweet. 🍂☕️����‍⬛
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MEAL IDEAS I LOVE:
Chickpeas in tomato sauce with rice
Whole bread sandwich without the crust: tomato, cheese and cucumber (ham if you want, i’m vegetarian c:)
Ratatouille or Shakshuka with wheat/bulgur
Apple sauce cookies (i can share a good recipe if you want)
Pasta/zucchini gratin
Lasagna (spinach or veggies with tomato sauce - or mince, once again, i’m vegetarian)
potatoes (sweet is even better) with broccoli
Mushrooms with bread
Tomato salad (vinegar, herbs, olive oil)
Lentil/corn cakes with cream cheese
Pumpkin pie
Vegetable broth (or chicken) with vegetable dices
Potato soup
Tomato orzo soup
Mashed potatoes with lentils
Lentil soup
Beetroot (it’s so good even on it own)
REMEMBER!
You always prefer ‘halloween’ themed pastries — involving apples, pumpkin, carrots…
Eating isn’t a bother, you’re just a slow eater. don’t hesitate to share your love for sweets, while keeping consummation low.
You get tired of veggies so much! never finish a meal you don’t like.
Your favourite candy is liquorice, and most halloween themed ones like acorn or hard candy
Keep the chocolate low. it’s too heavy and nauseating!
If you must, have a piece of nutella/peanut butter and jelly toast, oats, or milk with fruits in the morning. i promise it’s much better than those ‘healthy’ alternatives (makes you satisfies and low calorie if you only have one)
No crisps — they’re too oily and dirty your books. Pop corn is so much better (and lower in cols) — caramel or pumpkin spice is a staple!
Cinnamon on apples… the best treat!
If you ever eat out with family, eat only a third of the meal and get the rest to pack. it’s so good you want to make it last!!
Bake and cook as much as you can! This will make your parents understand what you like, and not push to make you eat those gross overly fat foods.
Try to stay under 1,000 kcals, but don’t count calories obsessively. keep portions small and always leave a third of your plate.
Have fun!
(i’ll make a moodboard with meals etc, i hope you enjoy!)
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luveline · 2 months ago
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anything with roan and eddie pls 🙏🙏 whatever you want to write about them!! i miss them 🥺🥺
thanks for requesting!! fem
Baking tray, beef cuts laid out flat. Eddie works in silence, dressing the beef with garlic honey, sesame seeds, and a big pinch of salt. He’d like to add some ginger, some paprika, but Roan doesn’t like when things taste smoky. 
He saran wraps the tray and puts it in the fridge. He makes everyone’s veggies —you like different stuff to Eddie, who likes different stuff to Roan, so he makes a garden’s worth of greens and douses them in olive oil, flaky salt, and a little dash of lemon and pepper. He puts that atop the beef in the fridge and tries to think of a side. He was planning on making pasta tonight, before he realised the beef was gonna go bad soon. Maybe he’ll make a pan of crispy mac and cheese to go with it. 
Yeah. He smiles to himself. That looks good on his head, two roasted ribs, a fist of mac and cheese, and a half a plate of roasted veggies. 
He cuts a little cilantro ‘cos Roan loves it, adds some lemon juice to that too, and sets it aside in the fridge. He makes a quick mac and cheese on the stove and tips it into a baking tray, covers a third of it in bacon bits for the youngster, and puts that in the oven. 
Then he sits at the table and sighs. Scratches two hands through his hair, lets the tight achy small of his back decompress as he leans forward. 
When Eddie started working at the shop with Wayne, he figured it would get easier over time. Part time table-bussing wasn’t going to pay for a trailer or his brand new baby, and for months it’s not like he could work anyhow. He lived solely off of his Uncle Wayne as he learned to change diapers, and calm colic, and be a new dad. It was depressing and frustrating all of the time. He felt like shit because he’d just fucking landed Wayne with another mouth to feed and diapers were so, so expensive, and so was formula, and baby clothes, and the guilt worsened when he realised he loved her. Loved Roan. He loved her pretty much the moment he laid eyes on her, but he had no idea if he could be a father, just knew he couldn’t let his kid fall into the system. 
But loving her had been second to panic for weeks. Then one day he was washing her tummy in the bath and he swore blind that she smiled at him, whether babies her age could smile or not. He tumbled out of the bathroom with her in a towel poncho to brag, and that night at dinner, Wayne gave a frowny Eddie the option: start working alternate shifts at the shop. Wayne would have her in the evenings while Eddie worked, they’d sorted everything out, he could start next week. It wasn’t half as scary as being a new dad, so Eddie said yes. 
Anyways, he expected it to get easier. He knows more about parenting and cars than he ever imagined at twenty, but it’s still hard. He’s exhausted. 
Good thing he knows exactly why he does it. 
The door to the living room opens with a creak. Small feet pad around the stair bannister and down the hallway that leads to the kitchen. Roan stops walking when she notices him behind the table. She smiles. She looks like him, less as she gets older, but enough to have given an appreciation for his own features. What’s more beautiful than seeing your smile on someone else’s lips?
“Hey, daddy.” 
“Hi, munchkin.” 
Truthfully, Roan has been his best friend for years. There’s something intangibly close about a single parent and their only child, especially when they’d lived alone. Day after day together, seeing all the gross bits and all the love. It’s given her a vast depth of emotional intelligence. She’s smarter now as a kid than Eddie was at 18. 
“You okay?” she asks, holding her hands up. He picks her up, plonking her on the table in front of him. “You look tired, daddy. And you smell like pepper.” 
“I just finished making ribs, babe.” 
“Yum!” Her nose moves when she talks, “For dinner?” 
“Mm-hm.” He finds her hand. Holds it gently. “Mac and cheese and roasted broccoli, too.” 
Roan smiles again. “Dad, you’re a good chef.” 
“I know I am! But it took so much practice. When you were born, you know what I was eating for dinner every night? I was eating chicken pot pie you put in the microwave.” She wrinkles her nose. “I know. I didn’t care about being good to my body. I definitely didn’t listen to my tummy.”
He likes this part about being a dad. He’s never found it awkward. He just drops his voice into softness and talks to her on her level. 
“But you learned.” 
“I did learn. I wanted to make sure you were eating everything you need. That’s why we eat all that broccoli.” 
She pokes him in the torso with her socked foot. “Maybe less broccoli for my tummy.” 
“I got potatoes and stuff too, don’t worry.” Eddie reaches for her hair in its after school mess, raking it away from her face. “You know I love you, right?” 
“Well, duh.” 
“I know, but really. I love you more than anything.” 
“More than Y/N?” 
“No,” he says quickly, then laughs. “Yeah, but just a little bit. It’s a different kind of love, okay? I love you both like crazy, but you’re my baby. Even though you’re not a baby anymore.” 
“I could be a baby,” she whispers, grinning, “I can be small again, and you can carry me everywhere, and give me a bottle.” 
He laughs roughly. “Yeah? You want a bottle? You barely like milk.” 
“Well, you can still carry me.” 
“I do carry you. I’m surprised these feet work,” he says, squeezing her toes in both hands. 
“Dad, don’t!”
“Sorry, sorry,” he presses his thumb between her foot and her toes and then drops them altogether. “I remember when your foot was the size of my thumb.” 
“I don’t.” 
He laughs more loudly than he means to and scoops her up for a rough and tumble hug. “God, I love you. I really do, bubby.” He presses his nose to her head and blames how tired he is for what he says next. “You are everything to me, you know that? You’re my everything.” 
“You’re my everything.” 
He tips her back to see her. Beams at her, touches his nose to hers. “You and Y/N, you make my life perfect.” 
“I’m glad,” she says, which has him laughing all over again, a childish giggle. 
When you get home a half hour later, you find them in weird places. Eddie’s sitting on the kitchen floor watching the ribs cook in the oven, and Roan’s under the table building a marble run with his approval. “Here?” she asks. 
“And the orange piece. We need more pieces, it’s not long enough.” Eddie smiles at you as you enter, but leans back, opening the cupboard under the sink to grab a saucepan, the sieve, and plastic jug. “We can use these.” 
“What’s up, my Munsons?” you ask. 
Roan smacks her forehead against the edge of the table in her excitement. “Ouch!” she says, crawling from under it to crowd your legs. 
“Ouch!” you echo, face morphed with concern as your handbag slides down your arm. You drop it to the floor and take her cheeks into your hands. “Did that hurt? I’m sorry, I feel like that was all my fault.” 
She shakes her head, curls bouncing this way and that. “It was an accident.” 
“I know, I know, but I didn’t mean to startle you.” You brush her hair back gently and hover. “Can I kiss it better?” 
“Don’t kiss it, it stings!” Roan says, veering away from you with a frown. 
“Sorry!” 
Roan twists away from you to fall into Eddie’s lap. 
“Sorry,” Eddie mouths. 
You pout. It’s with extreme beautifulness —is that a word? Eddie’s pretty sure it’s a word— you slip out of your little heels and sit down on your knees, stockings dark and perfect on legs he adores. You don’t question why they’re on the floor. That’s how you all fit, his smart working girl and your shared grumpy daughter, because nobody asked Eddie why he sat down by the oven. 
“Sorry, baby,” you say softly.
Roan’s frown worsens, but she says, “No, I’m sorry. My head hurts. I missed you.”
“I missed you too, big girl.” 
“Big girl?” she asks. 
“You sounded very grown up, is all.” 
Eddie has to agree. “You’re just that smart.” 
You hold his ankle. “So, how was work? How was school? Fill me in.” 
“How was your day?” Eddie asks. 
“Super usual and boring. We had some people from the Brussels branch come to visit and Jess kept telling me to stop being so awkward, and I asked her what she meant and she said I was smiling like somebody was holding me hostage.” 
Eddie loves when you smile like that. When you’d first met, you used to smile that way all the time. He loves all your smiles, obviously, but your excited–scared combo isn’t one he sees much anymore. 
You shrug. “But work paid for lunch, and I had this amazing mango passionfruit cake roll, I snook you some.” 
“You did?” Roan asks eagerly.
“I did! It’s in my purse, but it has a price.” 
“What’s the price?” Roan asks. 
You put your head in your hand. “I wanna know what you guys have been up to today.” 
When Eddie plates dinner that evening, it’s with a distinct sense of pride and content mashed together. It’s a damn good-looking meal, dense with nutrition and flavour alike, and you and Roan both seem similarly awed. Eddie wanted ribs and he got them, but almost as pleasurable as eating them is the way you both tuck in. You compliment his roasted veggies, telling him you could eat them for every meal, and Roan’s face is plastered in sticky honey garlic in minutes, a macaroni elbow in her hair. 
“Know what dad told me earlier?” she asks you. 
You snort and rescue her hair. “What did he tell you, baby?” 
“That we make his life perfect.” 
Eddie chokes on his coke. “That was a secret,” he says, throat burning, “between you and me?” 
“You didn’t tell me that,” Roan says.  
“Don’t be embarrassed, Eds.” Your eyes turn to hearts, staring at him over the steaming tray of macaroni and cheese. “You guys make my life perfect, too. My babe and my personal chef.” 
He dodges your cheek pinch, grabbing your hand to hold instead. 
“Just wish somebody would make me dinner every once in a while,” he says.
“Whatever,” you say. 
“Dad, I can make you dinner.” 
“I don’t trust you ‘round the kitchen.” 
Roan guides a forkful of cheesy macaroni to her lips. “Okay, good. I can’t make pasta like you,” she says. Eddie won’t mind making dinner again tomorrow. 
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biromantic-nerd · 2 years ago
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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 months ago
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Follow You Anywhere 10
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, obsession, controlling behavoiour, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: You’re online existence threatens to leak into your real life.
Characters: Captain Syverson
Note: back to work but still hurting.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Asking for more or putting ‘part 2?’ is not feedback.
Love you all. You are appreciated and your are worthy. Treat yourself with care. 💖
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You’re grateful only for the reprieve of Sy’s shower. He spends at least an hour in the bathroom but it’s not nearly enough time to figure this out. He’s not going anywhere and you have no way of changing that. And with how things are going, it won’t be long before you’re entirely trapped with him. 
The helplessness suffocates you. You slowly get up, needing to do something, anything to keep your thoughts from spiralling further. Or him. 
You go to the kitchen and pull out some chicken. Even with your recent shop, what you have won’t last. Not with two people. You marinate the tender breast as you pull out the jasmine rice and your mini rice cooker. Everything you have is built for one, it’s another reminder that he’s invaded your life. 
The bathroom door opens and you stay hidden in the kitchen. It’s only as he calls your name that you poke your head out. You don’t want him to think you’ve tried to escape again. Imagine that, escaping your own life. 
“Here,” you squeak and your mouth hangs open. He stands in only a towel. It’s low enough that the trail of hair along his stomach grows thicker just above the knot. Your lashes flick and you cough, “just starting dinner. Jerk chicken and... and rice.” 
“Sounds delicious,” he grins and runs his fingers through his beard. “Much better than field rations, eh, Aika?” 
He whistles at the dog and she perks her ears up. Sy sighs and drops his arms, smiling at you dreamily. Your eyes wander to the scars all over his body; a thick raised one along his ribs and smaller ones flecked along his shoulder and a line on his lower stomach. 
“I’ll get dressed,” he rubs his hands together, “can’t be eatin’ in my towel, huh?” 
“Sure, uh, I... I’ll be in here.” 
You go back into the kitchen and stare at the rice maker. You see the reflection of his scarred mind in his body. Again you can’t help the rent in your heart. That sympathy that underlines your fear. He’s a tortured soul but not one you can soothe. You don't know where to begin. 
You put the chicken in the oven and set the rice to cook. Next you look for a veggie. Broccoli. Standard. You’ll add a bit of seasoning. You’re not very hungry, even as the aromas rise in the air. 
“God, it’s hot in here,” Sy growls as he appears in the doorway that opens to the dining space.  
“It’s the oven,” you say as rinse the head of broccoli, “sorry.” 
“Ah, you know, it’s not half so bad as the desert,” he chuckles, “Aika knows. The way the sand gets all in your mouth and—and everywhere else.” 
“I can’t imagine,” you murmur, “wouldn’t be a day at the beach, I’m sure.” 
“Mm, no,” he agrees as he leans on the wall, “not a bad idea. I could take ya down for a beach day. We could get some good pictures. A few videos.” 
“Maybe, I don’t know,” you focus on your task. You put the broccoli on the cutting board and pull out a knife. 
“You want me to get that, sweetie? Don’t wanna cut yourself now,” he pushes away from the wall. 
“No, I got it,” you line up the knife and chop the head in half. He winces. 
“It’s dangerous, you got a smaller one?” 
“Really, Sy, I’m fine,” you insist as he looms closer, “let me just get dinner ready and you can sit--” you hiss as you pull your finger back at the sudden slip. 
“I told ya,” he accuses as he grabs your hand and examines it. His grip is iron and you don’t resist. There’s no blood. 
“It was just my nail,” you wiggle the top of your finger, “please--” 
“Let me do it,” he insists and reaches for your other hand, “give me the knife, sweetie.” 
You hesitate but hand it over. You’re not sure why he’s so nervous about it. Still, there’s no sense fighting over sharp objects. 
“We gotta work together, don’t we?” He says as he chops.  
“Sure,” you agree thinly. 
You turn to get a sheet pan for the broccoli. You’ll dress in oil and some spices, maybe a bit of lemon juice. As you lay parchment paper over it, he drops the knife in the sink. 
He remains, crowding you as he watches you work. You spread out the little branches and drizzle them over. You put them in beside the chicken and rinse off your hands. You dry off and glance over at Sy. He's watching you. 
“You really don’t have to stay out here,” you say. 
“I like being around you,” he grins, “still can’t believe it’s real.” 
Me neither, you think. 
“Well, all that’s left is the waiting,” you set a timer, “so...” 
“Ah, well, s��pose we can do that on the couch.” 
“Oh, well, I was gonna get the laundry together,” you say, the excuse popping up spontaneously. 
“Why don’t you wait ‘til tomorrow?” 
“Right, uh, I wanted to get it done. I need to get back to my commissions tomorrow.” 
“Mmm,” he hums flatly, “you work too hard.” 
You withhold a mean thought. He hasn’t mentioned work since he showed up. What about that desk he was talking about? You know better than to challenge him. You’ll keep the peace as long as you have to. Get through dinner then worry about the real test; bedtime. 
“Alright, let’s sit,” you relent and reach for his large hand.  
It’s not an affectionate gesture, merely appeasing. You can still hear his voice booming and the thump his skull made on the wall. Not to mention the state of his face and the dent in your wall. You can’t forget what he’s capable of. You can’t deny that you’re lucky he only hurt himself. 
He lets you guide him out of the kitchen and you try not to show your reticence. You won’t think of what happened on the couch last time. Besides, you can’t leave the food to burn. 
💗
You eat at the table. It’s an excuse for some space. As you waited for the timer to save you, you were trapped in his embrace. His constant touching and cooing. You should be flattered when someone tells you you’re pretty and perfect but he just makes you want to combust. 
You can hardly stay still. You clear the table and tidy up what mess is left in the kitchen. You can hear him prowling in the other room. You wipe down the table and peek up as he stops to watch you. 
“Almost done?” He asks. 
“Sure, uh, I’ll finish and get washed up for the night.” 
“Washed up?” He echoes. 
“Brush my teeth, wash my face, all that,” you explain. 
“Oh, yeah, makes sense.” 
“What about Aika? She need to go out?” 
He stops and looks at the dog, still laying at the door. 
“She should,” he intones grimly, “I’ll take her then.” 
He disappears into the bedroom as you let out a breath. It’s not much. You know you’re just putting off the inevitable. He reemerges with the jangle of keys and you see your phone case peeking out of a pocket in his cargo shorts. He might seem scattered but there’s something about him that assures you he’s just as calculated. 
“I’ll be back,” he assures and stops just by the door, “sure you don’t wanna come with us?” 
You rinse off the cloth and shake it out. 
“I’ll be fine.” 
“You should come...” he mumbles. 
“Sy,” you go to the doorway parallel to the apartment door, “I promise, I won’t go anywhere.” 
You have nowhere to go. 
He stares at you. His looks pale and drawn. He cracks his neck as he tilts his head one way then the other. He lets out a long exhale as he sets his head straight and he steps closer. Aika stands, her paws scuffing on the hardwood. You gulp as he makes himself bigger and glares down at you. 
“I know you won’t,” he says quietly, “because you know I’ll follow you anywhere, don’t you, sweetie?” 
You bat your lashes and gulp. You nod, “yes, captain.” 
His lips curve and he reaches to grab you, cradling the back of your head as he pulls you close and kisses your forehead, “good girl. Get nice and fresh for me.” 
He lets you go with a growl and you stand frozen between the counters. Aika watches him with her doleful eyes as he steps into his boots. He opens the door and points her out, not bothering to take the leash with him. She looks at you, wiggling her nose, before she goes. 
The door snaps shut behind Sy and jolt you. You can’t shake the grit in his voice. The subliminal threats laced into his proclamation of devotion. He found you and he’ll find you again, so why bother trying to run? 
You shut off the kitchen light and flit into the bedroom. You gather up a set of pajamas. A white tee and short pairing with little sliced oranges stamped into the fabric. You lock yourself in the bathroom and face yourself in the mirror. You look just as afraid as you feel. 
You lay out the pajamas to one side of the sink and put on the fluffy headband that keeps your hair out of the way. You start your usual routine, the familiarity the only comfort you have left. Brushing flossing, exfoliating, moisturizing, and toning. It’s the little things you started to make yourself feel better but they just aren’t working this time. 
You hear him return as you button up the pajama top. You stare at the door with dread and gather up your shirt and skirt, along with your panties and bra. You teeter on the balls of your feet, trying to find whatever you might call courage. He gets there first. 
The knock makes you jump. You quickly go to the door and flip back the lock. He opens the door from the other side before you can. 
“Everything okay?” He asks. 
“Yes,” you answer dumbly as you hug your armful of clothes. 
“Oh, you look... nice. Refreshed.” 
“Um, yeah,” you say as you waver. There’s no room to get around him. 
He steps back and waves you out. You carry the clothing into the bedroom to dump in the hamper and turn to find him looming in the doorway. Great. 
“You smell good,” he purrs as he peels off his shirt. 
“Did you lock the door?” You ask. 
“Don’t worry ‘bout that. You got me here to take care of ya,” he scoffs and hurls the shirt so it just barely clings to the side of the hamper. “Those are some cute jammies.” 
“Oh, uh, thanks,” you look down and pinch the sides of the shorts. 
“Long day,” he stretches and drops his arms, unbuttoning his shorts shamelessly. 
“Yep,” you agree, “be nice to sleep.” 
You go to the edge of the bed and slip beneath the duvet. You tuck your chin down as you hug yourself beneath the fluffy cover and keep your back to him. He flips the light off and you nearly whimper. The bed dips behind you and cool air flows under the blanket as he climbs in behind you. 
You’re not surprised when he swathes you in his thick arm. He pulls you against him, his furry chest flush to you as he purrs. You grasp his forearm and squirm as his heat surrounds you. He nuzzles your hair and plumes hot breath over your scalp. 
“Ain’t this nice? I could spend every night like this,” he growls as he keeps you curled up in one arm as his other hand trails down your side. “Never slept much over in the s—over there.” 
You squeak and stare into the static darkness. You tremble and force out a yawn. Maybe he’ll get the hint. For once. 
“I’m tired too, sweetie,” he toys with the bottom button on your shirt, “I know I’ll sleep all nice and cozy with you.”  
His fingers tickle your lower stomach and crawl beneath the cotton. You go rigid as he creeps up your soft flesh and you latch onto him as you try to stop him. He presses his lips to your crown. 
“Don’t be bad,” he warns in a gristle. 
You let him go with a babble. He brings his hand to cover one side of your chest. He squeezes and lets out a raspy groan. He rolls his hips and you feel he’s in need again. You close your eyes and brace yourself. It’s worse than the couch. You’ve laid yourself down in his trap. 
“You’re so soft, sweetie,” he fondles you, swirling his rough fingertips around your nipple, “so warm...” he inhales your scent and snarls, “you got me hurtin’ so bad.” 
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onepiece-fics · 1 year ago
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Sanji x picky eater!Reader
Description: Reader is a picky eater and doesn’t dare to tell Sanji. The chef, however, needs to get to the bottom of why you’re giving Luffy all your shrimp. Gender-neutral reader.
Word Count: 1187 
Warnings: Slight angst (mostly fluff though), Sanji is very flirty, mentions of difficult food habits.
Requested by anon<3
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You feel bad about it, but as you sit by the dinner table you can’t help but pick at some of the food on your plate. Dinner for tonight was shrimp paella, cooked by the amazing chef himself. Of course, anyone who knew of Sanji knew how amazing he was at cooking, there was no question about it, but having been born a picky eater you felt immense guilt with how you felt about some of his food. You hadn’t even told him the things that you can’t bring yourself to eat, scared that he would take offense, or maybe even try to force you to eat it like so many other people had tried in the past. 
You tried to pick away the shrimp on your plate and focus on the rice and vegetables instead, but of course, knowing that it had touched the shrimp was enough to put you off. 
“Ah? Y/N? Are you not having your shrimp? Can I have it?” the enthusiastic captain asks you from across the table. You nod and with a blush on your face, you shovel off the shrimp from your plate to his. You notice Sanji looking at the two of you from afar, and not being able to read his face makes you nervous. Is he taking offense? Do you look silly? Is he gonna think you’re being childish? You sigh and continue trying to eat the rice and veggies on your plate. 
When dinner was done Sanji came to pick up everyone’s plates like he usually did but when he came over to you he gave you a look.
“Could you please stay for a while Y/N? I’d like to talk to you for a minute” he says, a slight smile on his lip but a confusing look in his eyes. You nod and stay in your chair as everyone else leaves. When you notice he’s moving to wash the dishes you rush up and silently offer him your help. He starts handing you the wet dishes to dry off and stack neatly. 
“Do you not like shrimp?” he says suddenly, breaking the silence between you. You tense up a little, unsure what to say.
“Uhm, yeah, sorry, I’m not really that big on seafood in general…” you say quietly. He stops what he’s doing and looks at you, eyebrows raised.
“Why haven't you told me, Y/N? I don't want to make you food that you won’t enjoy… I’ll happily modify your dinner for your tastes!” he gives you a big smile and your face heats up. “Wait… Do you also not like eggs? And… Broccoli? Oh, and the spinach!” he says, his fist hitting his palm like he finally understood something. Your face is fully flushed and it’s so warm you swear Sanji could actually cook a full meal on it at this point.
“I- I’m so sorry Sanji. I know I should’ve told you a while ago but-! I can be really picky with food sometimes and it’s like super embarrassing and I don’t want to be rude or insult your cooking- and I don’t want you to think I’m childish or something either. It’s just how my tastebuds work! I can’t help it but I’m really so sorry, I’ll try to learn to eat those things, I promise!” You ramble suddenly, catching the chef off-guard. He looks at you with big eyes and moves to put his hand on your shoulder.
“Y/N…” he starts. “You don’t have to worry my dear, I know you would never intentionally be rude or anything. I have been worrying for a while that maybe my cooking skills had gone downhill… But this explains it all!” his hand moves from your shoulder to cup your cheek.
“Don’t worry sweetheart, everyone’s tastebuds are different and I totally get that. We all have things that we can’t stand to eat, if you just write me a list of things you don’t like I promise to make you the best food you can imagine, alright?” he smiles at you. You just stare at him in shock, a single teardrop falling from your eye which he quickly catches with his thumb. 
“S-Sanji… Are you sure it’s alright?” you ask him and he chuckles. 
“I’d much rather cook you food that you genuinely enjoy than keep feeding you things you just hand off to Luffy” he teases you. He pulls you in for a hug and kisses the top of your head. “I could never judge you Y/N, you’re way too kind to me for that” he whispers as you put your arms around him. 
Your emotions suddenly sweep over you and before you know it, you’re staining his suit with your tears. Even though you knew how kind Sanji was, a part of you thought that he was going to react the same way people had in the past. Far from everyone is kind to those who struggle with picky eating, no matter the reason for it happening in the first place. The fact that he was even offering to cook you your own personalized meals… You pull away from him, cringing as you see the wet spot on his shoulder from your tears.
“I’m sorry about that…” you sniffle and it makes him laugh. The sound of it brings you to a smile and you giggle with him. He takes one of your hands in his and raises your chin with the other one. 
“Now. No more being shy about food habits, alright?” his smile is dazzling and it leaves you breathless. You nod for a response and he smiles and leans closer to you. “I really mean it Y/N. If I get to cook extra food for such a beauty as you… It only brings me joy” he whispers. You bite your lip when you realize the position you’re both in. You leaning against the kitchen counter with him in front of you, leaning into you more and more. A blush spreads across your cheeks again and you gulp. You’re just about to lean up when– 
“Y/N!!!!” Chopper barges into the kitchen, opening the door wide open, scaring both you and Sanji shitless. He jumps off of you, hastily moving to do the dishes once again. “Usopp needs you! He’s convincing Luffy not to prank call the Marines! Please help us!” Chopper begs you. With your hand covering your blush the best you can, you look back at Sanji, a blush spread over his cheeks too, before giving a nod to the doctor.
“I- I’ll be right there Chopper! Steal the den den mushi if you have to!” you tell him. Chopper nods and runs back to wherever the captain is.
You look back at Sanji who’s shaking with laughter as he’s rinsing out a plate. 
“I’m expecting a note with all your least favorite foods by tomorrow” he tells you and winks. You nod and awkwardly move to leave the kitchen.
“Oh, and that note better include your favorite foods too, by the way. I want to make you only your favorite meals from now”. 
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z3rinn · 1 year ago
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# #. GROCERY STORE !! pt. 2
a part 2 to my grocery store post !! This time it contains scarabia - diasomania ! ahem- going grocery shopping is usually a mundane task, boring and usual. that is until the twst boys want to join you in your outing. you just hoped nothing would go wrong this time… for once…
Sorry this took so long to get out !! I hope you all enjoy !! ♡
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# #. KALIM AL-ASIM
Going grocery shopping with Kailm is definitely an experience. Its basically like bringing a kid to a candy store. He is ogling at everything around him. That's when you realize he's probably never even been to a grocery store-
By the way he's running around and pointing at everything- putting as many things in the cart as possible- (which you would not be able to pay for) you would like to place him in the baby seat of the cart, but alas he can't fit. So you just settle for placing him in the cart instead. Its at times like this you can imagine where Jamil is coming from. But its ok because he's a cutie patootie and i love him w all my heart- Oh! And just know that he finds the ride absolutely delightful.
Kalim tries to take turns with you when riding the cart, pushing you around the store while laughing happily. He walks into aisles youve never even seen before, showing off weird things that are fascinating to the both of you. Like that self washing cup! Or those lava lamps that costs well over 5000 thamarks !! But he could easily pay for them. You never thought grocery shopping could be so fun- and so you can't help but smile back at his amusement, joining along as the two of you ran around target.
9/10 it's a little overwhelming at first, yet going with him just makes you happy beyond words. Plus he pays!
# #. JAMIL VIPER
Jamil is obviously one of the best people to go grocery shopping with. He's a food expert, and he knows exactly what to get and do while there. Plus, he is most likely tagging along with you to get some things for the Scarabian kitchens.
As I said, Jamil's a food expert, and he knows just what to buy and get while out. Like I said in my previous post, Ruggie knows how to haggle with grocery store managers- and I think Jamil does too. He knows what products are the best, yet are also the cheapest, it's not like he's paying with Kalim's money. (Although he did offer to give you his card!) Jamil is also the type to not get distracted while out, so whenever you try to but something you definitely don't need, he'll snap you back in place.
While out with him make sure not to buy any frozen food, as it'll make him think your prefer that over his fresh and healthier food. And he'll give you a judging look due to it. Oh! And he's gonna cling to you the entire time. This is one of the only moments he'll be able to hang out with you without having to worry about any of his duties and Kalim. So don't question it if he holds on to you or if he's pressed up against you the entire time.
10/10, I'd go with him any day of the week. It doesn't even have to be to the grocery store smh.
# #. VIL SCHOENHEIT
Vil is taking you to some fancy ass grocery store. Like whole foods or sprouts, maybe even the mall. Or whatever the twst equivalent is. As if he'll you just go to some random grocery store- And with him- it's not gonna be all fun and games -_-
He immediately takes you to the veggie and fruits section, piling on good enough amounts of spinach, broccoli, tomatoes. He also buys fruit for his homeade smoothies, those will make your skin glow for days afterwards. It's annoying- you just want your chips- but you cant because of the preservatives. You just want some cookies. Yet you cant. Honestly you were this close to just falling to the floor and crying your heart out like a frenchman. "I JUST WANT MY JUNK FOOD" Shopping with him just seems like a chore instead of something fun tbh.
He's right in front of the cart, dropping only the necessities into it. You were this close to running him over the cart if he slapped your hand one more time for trying to reach out to the chips. He gives you a glare, and tries to resist your puppy eyes. With a click of his tounge he eventually does calm down, dropping a bag of Cheshire Chips into the cart. He might allow it if you come over to Pomefiore to do some face masks with him.
5/10. It's like going shopping with a mom or like a weight trainer or smth. You understand why he's doing this of course- But theres no funny business with him. Zero. Sigh. Well he pays at least. I LOVE HIM I SWEAR-
# #. ROOK HUNT
When Rook notices you walking out of the broken down building you were staying in, from the tree right above your house, he obviously offered to accompany you on your endeavor! Even when you told him you were just going to the grocery store a part of him just couldn't help but be overjoyed. Oh how he just loved being out with you!
Rook is notorious for loving the smallest of details- the simplest things in life. So going to a grocery store and seeing all the beautiful people surrounding him- along with the gorgeous displays of food made his heart practically smile. You watch as he holds an apple in his hands, raising it up to the sky with a glorious smile on his face. (You're this close to just walking away-) He's humming in joy as he recites a poem of the luscious, juicy, red apple to you. Very fun !!
Meanwhile- when Rook is not being a hopeless romantic for apples, the huntsman is all fun and games !! He's straight up singing in the store, admiring anything and everything. He watches as you shop for groceries, a smile on his face. Rook lets you sit in the cart whenever you get tired, pushing you across the store while humming to himself lightly. Just don't say you're getting tired while going back. He'll carry you all the way back.
8/10- he's a bit over bearing at times. But its Rook so like what can you say about it? I love Rook yall.
# #. EPEL FELMIER
Epel is tagging along for two very important reasons! Firstly, his family has branched out to stores all across twisted wonderland- and he obviously has to make sure the quality and presentation were absolutely perfect! Secondly, he gets to hang out with you!
Epel makes his way to the fruits aisle first, dragging you along with a bright smile. His excitement is slowly seeping into you, causing you to laugh yourself. The two of you make your way to the fruits section, the both of you gawking and jumping up and down happily. After that little moment its basically a normal shopping spree. He has experience in going out to the grocery store with his family- so he helps out with practically everything!
He tries to show off as much as he can. He'll help out with the water packets, and baskets carrying them if your hands get tired. He will jump up to grab the snacks you need- that might be too high for you reach. Speaking of snacks - Being out with you lets Epel get junk food and snacks that Vil would NEVER allow- so maybe the two of you can sneak them in the middle of the night.
10/10 !! One of the best to go with! He doesn't bother you whatsover and is very helpful. Guys I love Epel so much KDHDVFTSSKS
# #. IDIA SHROUD
Uhhh- your more likely going to a electronics store- and then maybe stopping at the grocery store on the way back. There's NO way Idia would ever go out to a grocery store on his own. Especially if Doordash exists. But if you stop by an electronics store first, and you need a handsome firey head boy to show you around the store. How could he ever refuse??
He felt like a prince, leading you through his castle while showing off all his prized possessions. While in reality he was just walking through Best Buy or something, and was being an unemployed clerk. He probably pays for your electronics- or maybe he says he'll just make them for you! His designs are 100 times better obviously. However on your way out, he doesn't expect you to point out the whole foods or twst version is across the street.
He basically just sticks to you like a shadow while out. The poor dormleader can't help but be scared that people are gonna judge him for being blue all over. That is until you tell him this was your little shojou moment. Walking out in a supermarket together, inspecting what brand of eggs or milk you should get. It's the whole package! Well obviously now he can't complain. But now he might be just a bit too excited to be here.
6/10 Honestly if you needed groceries that badly you could've just asked him to order from online. Doordash is sooo much easier that doing it the plain (and scary) way.
# #. ORTHO SHROUD
Ortho probably tagged along to experience the "real" life. He's seen families on TV before- and he can't help but crave that domestic lifestyle. So when you ask if he wants to tag along- how could he ever refuse?
He's buzzing with excitement! Hovering around the grocery store with stars in his eyes. Usually he orders groceries from the comfort of his brother's dorm- it's a lot easier that way- but going outside is just so fun !! Ortho might even switch to his P.E form, as it'll make it easier for him to walk around the store like you! Although, he does want to try riding in the cart, it's something that everyone wants at least once in their lives- so how could you say no?
He's very helpful too, it's common courtesy since you took him out in the first place. He's able to reach high places and doesn't have trouble carrying the heavy things. Another plus is if your shy (like his brother) he's able to scan the store and find whatever you're looking for- without asking any employees for help! Sweetie pie fr.
10/10. He's one of the best to go with! Plus no complaints here (like his older brother)
# #. MALLEUS DRACONIA
Malleus? Why does he go??? He just wants to hang out with you. And maybe see how human grocery stores are nowadays. But its mainly the first one. Perhaps when the two of you are out on one of your nightly walks- you suddenly remember that, "Oh no! You forgot to get groceries!!" And now you have to take a menacing dragon man out with you.
Like others, Malleus tags along behind you, inspecting the many products and items in the aisles. He asks questions about products he finds interesting, he'll inspect all the different kinds of fruits (dragon fruits especially), and he'll find different products to try out. He'll always ask you for help too, asking if something is good enough to get. Like that tamagotchi in the corner !! He should get a bunch of friends for Roaring Drago...
He's so oblivious and confused it's kind of funny. Just imagine being a little kid and seeing a giant- like a literal GIANT- standing in the ice cream aisle inspecting the icecream sandwiches. Kinda silly ngl. Wait- what this- your phone is buzzing now? Who? Sebek? Wondering where Waka-sama is? Uh oh.
7/10! It's like going out w a kid whose never been to the outside world- but in a fun way. It would be higher if he told Lilia or Sebek he was tagging along tho... hopefully you don't go deaf from sebek yelling !
# #. LILIA VANROUGE
Did you bring him along? No! Of course not! Should you have noticed he was trailing behind you? Yes! But you didn't because he's an old fae that has experience? Right again! Does that excuse you? No. Obviously not. It's a rule by almost everyone in the dorm. Never bring Lilia grocery shopping. But your dumbass still did.
Well as long as he didn't feed you the food it was fine- right? So you'll let him tag along i guess. Lilia is the type to sit in the cart as you drag him around the store, and he only really gets out when he needs something. You guys probably stop by the spices aisle like 10 times- you feel bad for those in diasomania who are eating that mush. He tells you about the stores in Briar Valley and how he would take silver out when he was but a boy.
It's nice to listen to him as he drops another (that's 15) box of noodles into your hands- again, you feel bad for the people who are going to eat this. You guys probably bulk up on food while there- I mean it's totally not like Lilia has a butt load of money from being an old ass general right? And of course hes not gonna spoil you because your the best right? Yeah of course nottt. Just be careful at the end of your trip. As compensation for taking him with you he might offer to make you something.... and it might be a bit rude to say no....
9/10 ! It's nice listening to him talk- but uhm like many before this- you won't make it through his ...amazing... cooking skills.
# #. SILVER
Silver had spent most of his life living with fae and not many humans. Briar Valley doesnt have many grocery stores- instead being filled with various farmer markets and merchant's. Meaning he'd never been to a grocery store!! So obviously you had to invite him.
Silver is straight up just following you. He's wandering silently like a little cat, trailing from behind. He's looking around with a hint of curiosity. The store was very different from Sam’s- bigger and more luminous. It had a certain vibe to it. He liked it though, it was oddly comforting. Silver usually sticks to himself, but you can tell when something is confusing him. Take the dragon fruit for example, when he saw it a slight chuckle escaped his lips. It looked so different compared to the dragons and longs he’d met before. You couldn't help but laugh yourself- It’s fun watching him experience something new.
Silver is a very reliable man, if you ever need any help he won’t hesitate to jump in. He will help with the cart, the heavy groceries, the water jugs that weigh a mountain load. As you all know- Silver gets tired (and omg he's so pretty thats not fair) and wont hestiate to fall alseep on you if he ever gets tired. So easy solution: just put him in the cart and bury him in food. It’s easier to drag him that way. (instead of him sprawling on top of you)
10/10. Love him. I love HIM. HIIIMMMM. I LOVVVEEEEE HIM. RAAAAAAHHHH-
# #. SEBEK ZIGVOLT
There's no way in wonderland Sebek would ever go with you! He has duties to attend to! He has a beautiful, mystical, enchanting prince to protect!! Malleus was of the upmost importance, why would he ever go with a dumb human like you? You didnt matter compared to his leige-- Lilia is making him accompany you.
At first Sebek will grumble to himself, upset he couldn't stay with the majestic Malleus. Yet he soon remembers (you reminded him) that Lilia was the one to tell him to accompany you. So he immediately assumes this is a type of training for him !! Oh and now he's bragging that he got to join you on this trip instead of Silver- oh boy-
Like others, Sebek will help. Uhm. But like- loudly. As he carries the bags he will ask if you notice how strong and capable he is, a smirk on his face. And then he goes on a rant about Malleus. Whenever you need something you can't reach he will help, with a "human" comment on the tip of his tounge. And then he goes on about Malleus. It's kind of funny though not gonna lie- seeking a giant man boasting while getting groceries of all things. Very fun!
3/10. But a nine in my heart. He's so silly. Anyway. GRAAAHHH- I WANNA PULL HIS HAIR OUT (in a loving way !!)
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starryeyeesworld · 8 months ago
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Veggies mealspø moodboard 🥦✨️
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(As per the results from the poll I made 💚 I'm not sure this turned out the way I wanted it but it's cute so here you go)
Recipes
1) Just having plain uncooked veggies as snack is so nice (especially crunchy vegetables). Even if you add a simple dip it doesn't add too many c@ls!
Recipe for tztziki
You add in a bowl low fat greek yoghurt, grated cucumber, diced dill, diced garlic, a bit of olive oil and salt and you mix it (you can add mint too)
(A recipe for hummus is a bit harder but if you want it dm me and I'll try my best to explain)
2) Cucumbers or tomatoes on a rice cake with a little bit of light cream cheese 😋
3) vegetable soup
Veggie soup is actually pretty easy to make. Just cut veggies of your choice (carrots, onions, broccoli, celery, green beans). Lightly soute the veggies in a little bit of oil (its good to add them one by one starting from the one that needs to cook for longer to othe once that need less cooking). Then add some veggie broth (if possible low sodium one) and boil until ready.
4) Salad
Literally so easy but delicious and so filling. I usually just put a little bit of olive oil, salt, and lemon juice and it's soo good. Leafy greens, tomato, cucumber, and raw onion 😋 (you can add a few cubes of low fat feta cheese as well)
5) boiled or souted veggies (Brocoli, carrots) on top of rice is so nice as well, and so quick to prepare and easy to meal prep!
I hope this is somewhat helpful to at least one person~ 💚
I'm not sure how this post turned out but I tried my best~
If something in my explanation is unclear, you could always dm me or ask in the comments!!
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xanasaurusrex · 11 months ago
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Bonjour! May I ask, my dear, for Dionysus cabin? Amazing therapists, I think they’d be. Not sure though. Thank you so much hand, obviously, feel free to decline!
⇢ ˗ˏˋ dionysus cabin headcanons ࿐ྂ
bonjour my dear! thank you so much for requesting! mr. d is one of my favorite characters, so i'm really excited to do these.
i think the first and biggest thing i should mention about dionysus kids is: they know how to party.
i mean, their dad is literally the god of wine
of course they're gonna be the definition of party animals
wherever there's a party, they're always the life of it
they're rarely ever the ones to start the party because they tend to be rather scatterbrained and don't have the attention span to plan a party, but they love attending them
they love attending parties
dionysus kids are the definition of heavyweights
it takes a lot to get them drunk
like they can get buzzed and tipsy or whatever but it takes a lot for them to become actually drunk
they know how to have fun sober, though, trust me
dionysus kids are very festive souls
they love holidays, any holidays, and go above and beyond decorating for them and getting everyone and themselves in the real feel of the holiday
they love halloween because you can go all out for decorations
they love christmas for the same reason
a random thing to note; dionysus kids have a special affinity for grape flavored things
grape flavored candy, grape flavored drinks, you name it, and dionysus kids are all over it
they also love fruit
their dad is the god of fruit and orchards, so they're a big fan of it
of course, grapes are their favorite
dionysus kids really love raisins, too
they're just dried grapes, so they find the flavor pleasant enough
there are definitely dionysus kids who don't love raisins, but most dionysus kids will eat them if there's nothing else to snack on
this is one of those things that everybody else in camp judges them for, but they get to enjoy raisins with each other so it's okay
dionysus is also the god of vegetation, so dionysus kids also tend to like veggies more than the average kid
dionysus kids like veggies as toddlers, which is a big sign to them being a dionysus kid
like, they'll even devour broccoli
anyways
another thing about dionysus kids is that they generally have a pretty good relationship with their dad
he is the camp director, so they see him a lot more than the average half-blood sees their godly parent, but dionysus also generally builds relationships with his kids, so they get close, and they have good relationships
dionysus also doesn't like having lots of kids, he doesn't like being too outnumbered, so there's never too many dionysus kids in the cabin at once
this makes it easier for him to create lasting relationships and makes it easier to bond with them individually
i know mr. d was kinda an asshole to percy but i do headcanon him as a pretty good dad
because there's not usually an abundance of dionysus kids that also means that they get really close with each other
dionysus kids are each other's ride or dies
they consider each other their best friends
there's never usually more than 4 in the cabin at once so it's like a little friend group, except you all have the same dad!
so fun fact
dionysus is also the god of insanity and ritual madness
this does come across in dionysus kids, unfortunately
dionysus kids can go fucking insane sometimes
please, please please please, i beg of you
never cheat on a dionysus kid
think carrie underwood, but like times a thousand
all dionysus kids know before he cheats by heart because they've sung it at the top of their lungs in their cars after getting cheated on for the first time
and then they've gotten revenge
it's never pretty
i can't legally go into the details (aka i'm too tired to come up with the details) but please never do it
if not for the sake of the dionysus kid heart you're breaking but for your own
dionysus kids are also generally really gifted actors
dionysus is the god of theatre, and since he has a passion for it, he likes to pass that passion down to his kids
there's a sort of drama club within camp half-blood
(founded by dionysus kids and heavily supported by the camp director of course)
they like to put on shakespeare because it's very greek tragedy-esque, but usually without the actual greek tragedy
also whenever there's a sword fight, it's easy to perform and choreograph because they're already being trained in swordsmanship, so they already have that skill (or at least know how to handle a sword without decapitating themselves)
dionysus kids like to think shakespeare was a dionysus kid
mr. d will neither confirm nor deny
(but the glint in his eyes whenever you bring it up leans more towards the affirmative)
randomly going back to them being heavyweights thing, even if they do get drunk, it's rare for a dionysus kid to get a hangover
which is something they endlessly brag about to other campers
"oh, it's weird that i eat raisins? well, i don't get hangovers so suck it"
dionysus kids also have a hilarious sense of humor
like these kids are really funny
their sense of humor consists of a lot of sarcasm and teasing and stuff like that
they can be really annoying as older siblings and younger siblings
a lot of "why are you hitting yourself? why are you hitting yourself?" copying, and other stuff like that
basically, dionysus kids are super cool and crazy and chaotic, but they're hard not to love
it's also pretty nice being friends with a dionysus kid because they can get you out of trouble with their dad if what you did was pretty mild and they ask really nicely
they're also just so freaking fun at parties that it's so nice having them around
consider yourself lucky if you're a friend of a dionysus kid
so it's 2:30 am and i have to be up at 9 but i got inspired by this and i want to start pumping these out faster, so here you are! dionysus cabin headcanons. i hope you liked them, i had so much freaking fun writing these! thank you so much for reading, please reblog, i love you all so much! muah!!
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