#big rip for me
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Heads up -
I’m gonna be away from home for a while , and since the wi-fi in this other place is pretty terrible I’m not sure how active I’ll manage to be in the next few days , most importantly drawing wise :I
Hopefully it won’t be too long !
#fictionalsillies blog#mann … can’t wait to go back#being trapped in a minuscule space with my parents ain’t the best ;—;#big rip for me
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Payneland²
#payneland#edwin x charles#dbda#dead boy detectives#doom patrol#anon who asked for the doom patrol crossover this one is for you... hope you're still around#thanks for introducing me to this particular version of the boys they are MESSY#rip dp edwin he's not ready to have this conversation#also i considered including dp crystal but there was already a lot going on#also i was gonna make a charles vs charles kinda thing because this town ain't big enough for two of them#and then they decide to ask the edwins and they're just like “obviously charles is the best” and both charles are happy for a second#because they assume they're talking about him
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“lilith got charlie in the divorce” “lucifer got charlie in the divorce” actually alastor got her
#update:#yall had your fun but i dont want a post this big#RIP MY ACTIVITY FEED FR#I DONT EVEN LIKE THIS SHOW LIKE ITS NOT EVEN GOOD#HE DIESNT EVEN LIKE KIDS??? HELP. IMAGINE GOING TO HELL FOR SERIAL MURDER AND NOW YOURE JUST BEING PETTY LIKE THAT#like i have a LOT of criticisms for this show but this one joke really got me holy shit.
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His little TEEFIES
#he do a big chomp#rip Venus flytrap#obey me shall we date#obey me premium picture#obey me beelzebub#om beelzebub#omswd beelzebub
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orca statue sketch painting!! drew a thumbnail of it in class like two weeks ago then i was like :O i have to try to render this!! gemstone hard to draw d:
#wings of fire#wings of fire seawing#seawing#wof seawing#this took like seven hours#was messing around with a bunch of stuff#tumblr did not let me post the big picture :(#said i had to compress it rip
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do you think that mugman cosplays as any popular video game princess, like Rosalina or Zelda? ^^
Idk if Ive ever mentioned how much mugman and Luigi have in common but I think mugman should dress up as princess peach so that’d give them one more shared experience
#sometimes I forgot they’re in the 30s rip cuphead and mugman you would’ve loved video games#but seriously they are both the little brother in a pair of twins. the quieter more relaxed one of the two. red big brother. big nose#scared of ghosts. same shoes even. both have worn dresses. (they are also both genderfluid to me)#mugman#such a strange and specific post but this was all I could see the minute I read this ask
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Honestly, it’s exhausting running a positivity blog. There is so much negativity on my posts. Sometimes aggressive, or people saying “this doesn’t apply to me” or “this doesn’t apply in this situation though”. And it’s tiring. It’s tiring to read through my activity feed. Sometimes I’m trying so hard to be positive and offer supportive words and the negativity hits me a lot harder when I’m in a depressive episode. I genuinely feel exhausted by a lot of the comments people leave.
I’m not saying this for sympathy or even to whine but I kind of want to talk about it because I don’t think most people do this intentionally and maybe there’s a chance that when they realize the negative effects their comments can have might think twice? It’s not just me that finds this draining. I see it everywhere.
Someone posts a video of their popular dog and there are comments “oh my god, I’m going to be so sad when the dog dies” and I’ve seen owners politely asking people not to leave comments like that because it’s upsetting to think about. But they’re endless. I get so heartbroken thinking about the day my dog dies, and I know it’s inevitable but if I had people reminding me on all my posts about my dog, I’d be so upset.
I’ll see someone share a video of a happy moment with their family and the comments are full of people talking about how “it must be nice. My family isn’t like that”. And your feelings are so valid. You deserve to be able to talk about it. I’m just asking that maybe you think about where you’re talking about it.
I make a post that says something like “be gentle with your past self” and there will be dozens of comments and asks I receive that say “no fuck that bitch.” Like you’re so allowed to feel that way, but it’s tiring to get asks about it.
I know there will be people who go on about “it’s a public platform. You sign up for this”. But whether that’s true or not, I still think it’s worth saying because it might open someone’s eyes.
There will also be people who say “if you can’t handle it, stay off the internet”. Me venting about it, or saying that it’s frustrating doesn’t mean I can’t handle it. It just means I’m coping by talking about my feelings. That’s all.
#April vents#this got so long#I’m having big feelings today#I have had 6 hours sleep in three days#and I’m in a depressive#so rip to me I guess#but my venting tag#is a great tag to block if you’ don’t want to see my complaining lol
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we should make Nico more fucked up, actually. enough woobifying him. that boy should be covered in blood and viscera
#pjo#riordanverse#nico di angelo#we've done ''nico ships where his partner coddles and takes care of him while he heals from the innumerable trauma''#now let's do more ''nico ships where his partner helps him move past his trauma and enables him to be gay do crime''#more nico ships where nico is having his big 3 kid force-of-nature moments and his boyfriend goes ''HOT''#whatever happened to ''Will and Nico's first date was killing a man together. also Michael was there''#even stuff like. [tsats spoilers] getting all your negative attributes physically ripped out of you and turned into immortal creatures#that perhaps could leave you Changed! give me Nico who had the darkness taken from him#and it leaves him just a little unsettlingly bright and empty like a partial husk of himself#give me Nico whose cacodaemons can reabsorb back into him like he's their walking nest to hide in and emerge from whenever they please#he's just left an unsettling host for shadow monsters of pain and trauma#that's just one avenue. Nico's the spooky guy let him be spooky!#im constantly rotating just normal Nico operating on underworld laws/logic/mortality in my brain#make him WEIRDER
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The gayest sketch ever
My brain did a thing. Now both of em are two women. Enjoy genderbent gayness. Soon more gender bent.
Reblogs are essential :3
#voltron#lance mcclain#lance my beloved#voltron au#klance#keith kogane#klance au#denalicous#lance genderbent#Keith genderbent#female lance mcclain#female Keith#gay panic#Keith would love lesbians#rip lance he would love to be a woman#big spoon little spoon#big spoon lance supremacy#we all know Keith is on the bottom bunk#battle me on this#the gayer the lower they go… not in hell but like in the …yk what maybe I’m going to hell.
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Continuation of my other post here, the autobots have come close to figuring out that Optimus is the sire but Optimus is way too moral to spark up an subordinate so they don’t look into it more
Skywarp stole the evidence, Ratchet doesn’t notice cause he and Optimus are too busy with the baby for any fun private parties
#Skyfire: hey guys lately sometimes I feel like someone is glaring at me#Ratchet is considering just telling everyone before Optimus goes insane that his special ops team can’t figure this out#any weaker mech would go feral with these protocols plus the matrix but Optimus is Optimus so he’s holding up pretty well#wheeljack put bumblebee in place of where he thinks people would place him#hes not putting himself on the list lmao rip bumblebee though at least the sparkling is too big for people to believe it#me shoving my rare pairs in here#Thundercracker guessing bumblebee cause they interfaced before and got he a pregnancy scare#he was less worried about the sparkling and more worried about Starscream knowing he bottomed#to bumblebee#Skyfire messaged Starscream about Wheeljack but don’t ask STARSCREAM for dating advice he sucks at that#I wanted to have Starscream say something about starfire getting his old teacher pregnant but he’s already yapping a lot#off topic but some of my WIPS in my Ratchet folder went missing rippp#milk comic I will finish you even if god doesn’t want me too#transformers#ratchet#optimus prime#transformers fanart#optiratch#Starscream#thundercracker#skywarp#megatron#command trine#prowl#wheeljack#this is stupid#I LEARNED HOW TO HYPERLINK ON MOBILE#transformers g1
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it's hard loving yourself
#i can't keep lying to myself#how do you love something that is so unlovable#i'm poison. i come from poison. i have poison inside me and i destroy everything i touch. that's my legacy.#i pour alcohol into the gaping hole inside my chest. it does not heal. not today. maybe tomorrow. maybe it wont heal ever#smoke fills my chest . empty it can be#yet so full of your absence#im nothing but an empty husk of what I once was#and a big part of me was already forcefully ripped away from me when you left#hello hi im back with ghoap angst#can you believe its been a whole week since i drew them#anyways#gummmyart#doodle#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#soapghost#ghostsoap#angst#implied mcd
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mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.
now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.
He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.
(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)
The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.
The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.
And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.
(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)
The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.
anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)
#mxtx svsss#svsss au#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#disciple shen yuan#scum villain#svsss#*points at SQQ/SY* i want him to go nuts. as a treat. let him crumble just a little over the stress of his fate and the stress of survival#and the stress of having a lack of autonomy over a handful of his decisions. starry craves angst and she craves a very specific SQQ angst#he was a number 1 hater back in the day and lbr being a hater takes energyyyy. ive heard that this man was the BIGGEST hater i wanna#see him rip a man to shreds with nothing but his tongue and a voice that could cut marble clean in half. skin a man alive sqq you deserve i#*mortal kombat voice* FINISH HIM#i love without-a-cure but unfortunately i dont think SQQ would be able to have WAC and also survive in the abyss.#the succubi nest that adopted him tried seducing him at first. it didn't work. but he did somehow charm them with his cringefail ways#so now they have a brand new mortal big/little brother to dote on. SQQ is frankly delighted to learn all about succubi culture that doesnt#revolve around sex. he makes quite a few friends/allies in the abyss because of his pure fascination and unbiased desire to learn about#demonic culture and all the different niches and nuances of it across species. he's still going insane tho. like that's not stopping.#there's a single LBH pov chapter in the fic and its frankly so unhinged it was fantastic. he's so possessive. he straight up goes:#'oh SQQ isnt gonna be the next peak lord. he's ascending to heaven with me when i do :)' when Sha Hualing (also peak lord) told him that he#couldn't keep his disciple in the bamboo house all the time. what was SQQ gonna do when LBH ascends and he becomes the new peak lord?#gosh that first chapter is rotating around in my mind so bad. LBH was SO unwell. like losing his actual shit over SQQ near the edge.#i so want to write a oneshot abt this where SQQ is also in hysterics (albeit over slightly diff reasons) and tells LBH on his knees:#'this disciple deeply apologizes to his shizun. for he will not be ascending to the heavens with him.' right before he falls into the abyss#this au being disciple SY is for shits and giggles but i can also see it happening for regular SQQ bc 'fuck it im a dead man either way'#frothing at the mouth at this idea also being a SY-is-SJ au too. for the extra angst of SQQ trying to bear the weight of multiple lives on#his shoulders and trying to figure out what is real and what isn't and if he's meant to suffer in all of his lives no matter what he does.#not once in his life has he ever been free to do what he likes has he? self-hatred to the max. he's going mad. poor boy :]
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drawing your favorite guys being silly is very effective at keeping The Horrors at bay
bonus doc from a different canvas:
#back to the future#bttf#bttf fanart#marty mcfly#doc brown#emmett brown#kit does an art#yeah i have ten million other things i should probably be drawing instead (rip askbox left to dry...) but#sometimes you just need to draw your favorite guys giving each other physical affection. actual health benefits from this. would recommend#was feeling The Horror beforehand and then i drew them hugging and suddenly The Horror was gone! scientifically proven [citation needed]#the one where doc picks him up and spins him around makes me unreasonably happy i love being an artist!!!!#some of the other little doodles were just bc i still had the doodle bug but didn't want to commit to another big drawing haha#when in doubt give them the dotdotdot expression#the first drawing is based off of this gifset i saw of mjf jumping into other people's arms#good gifset. will need to look for it again. that man can jump#it's also a redraw! i drew the same thing when i first fell into this fandom hole#but that was before i knew how to draw them 100% so i never posted it haha#i love their stupid antennae. especially docs. he can go ! and ? and sometimes <3 it's so funny to me i love that thing#the one where he's sending radio waves to marty is soo stupid i keep laughing when i look at it#'marty. do not listen to that guy call you a chicken. stay calm' 'shit the signal's weak he didn't get my message'#tag as ship and a plague of locusts will be upon ye.#and yes. they are invasive and WILL wreak havoc on your local native wildlife
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needles <333
#i imagine he was wearing a big fluffy coat that he dramatically ripped off revealing all the needles before hugging that guy#he’s just a big needle bush to me#tmagp#tmagp fanart#tmagp 6#the magnus protocol#needles tmagp#needles tw#jaspers art
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[ID in alt]
hi hey hello. you should go check out @u3pxx 's piece for the mea culpa zine I just made a fun and silly continuation of it because im normal about it <3
more fun and silly shenanigans under the cut
[ID in alt]
#ashenart#aa4 spoilers#apollo justice#trucy wright#phoenix wright#clay terran#apollo justice ace attorney spoilers#weh weh weh 👍proud of myself for getting this done in like. 3 days. sorry to the art asks in my inbox im almost done with yall too#anyways posting this scared style hope everyone likes#<- actually wait no im gonna ramble REALLY FUN TIME WITH THE COLORS ON THIS ONE kinda heart of the cards-ing it#ive been also working on an oc comic for the past couple of months and that + this i think im getting better at servicable backgrounds#I think this is the first big piece ive done w/o lineart and instead just drawing over the sketch i really like how its came out#there was also a scrapped 5th page that was dropped just bc trucy finding the body fitted better for an ending RIP beanix jumping over the#couch you will be missed. by me
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Dreamling can be dads together, as a treat
#dreamling#hob gadling#dream of the endless#death of the endless#matthew the raven#the sandman netflix#death finally managing to convince her brother to take his shoes off#im baby crazy rn and need to project it onto literally anything but me#did i accidentally let a sketch on a tiny canvas get out of control#yes#which is why there is no big hq version of this rip#my art
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