#yall had your fun but i dont want a post this big

[finedinereception]

“lilith got charlie in the divorce” “lucifer got charlie in the divorce” actually alastor got her

[nieceeee]

"MATTERS OF THE HEART"

P/S credited to @wttcsms

"pro athlete character who gets featured on a tiktok for the team where the social media manager asks to see what’s in the players’ lockers. he opens up his and everyone is shocked to see stick figure drawings from y’alls kids & printed out selfies of him, you, and your kids. the domestic display is so different from his in-game personality that it almost feels like a prank, but when questioned further, he just tells the viewers, “my locker is full of reminders for who im playing and winning for."

I saw this and the story automatically popped into my head I hope you dont mind!

PAIRING: footballplayer!ony x reader.

A/N: So much fluff it will make your teeth rot! Sweet sweet Ony! This one came to my head to fast! I hope yall like it!

Being the social media manager of a football team kept you on your toes. You were used to all the antics: trash talking, flexing, the hype. It was like second nature for these guys. Your goal has always been simple, keep the fun and relatability. With this new trend, you were sure that this was going to be the perfect opportunity to showcase some of star players. 

Especially Ony.

Onyankapon AKA Ony AKA The Beast always carried a different level of mystery. Literally known as “The Beast” to his opponents. Ony was a quiet storm. Through all the post-game interviews, fan interactions, and behind the scene content, Ony normally kept to himself. He was reserved, leaning more in the background instead of the spotlight. The way he saw it, the field was his stage. Ony was the ghost outside of his highlights and the people wanted more. 

“Where is Ony?”

“Why is Ony never apart of the videos?”

“We need Ony on the screen!”

Week after week, the fans were restless. They wanted to see the beast outside of his natural habitat. And today was the day, little did you know, that it was going to happen. And not only that but it was going to break the internet in a way you never knew possible. 

You had pitched the idea for this part of the series a few months ago. The “Get to know us” playlist you had created on the team page had gained a lot of traction and the next video up was the “What’s In Your Locker?” trend. A TikTok video where the players give their fans a peek into their personal lockers to get a glimpse at their personality and lifestyle outside of the field. “It's not going to be anything too crazy. Just the basic snacks, routines, lucky charms, etc.” you explained in the meeting. 

It was going to be a piece of cake. 

Little did you know what Ony had in store for you and for the fans. 

You walked into the locker room, camera crew right behind you. They had the lighting set up and ready to go for the series. The team had finished another practice and they were doing their daily shenanigans, joking and messing around. “Okay boys! Cameras are about to start rolling!” you call out, giving them time to settle down before the red button popped up, indicating you were rolling. You grabbed the mic and started your rounds. This series would be a little bit different since it was live so everything had to flow well.

You start off slow walking over to Reiner, his southern slang and calm demeanor always setting a good tone for the videos. Chats start rolling in of women cooing over him. “Okay big Rei, my sweet guy. What’s in your locker?” you start. “Hey there darling.” He greets you. Hearts fill up the chat. He opens his locker door.  Everything is neat and organized. Clothes folded and tucked away. There was a small Texas magnet in the door holding a picture up of a young Reiner and his “nana” as he called her. Clean cut and to the point just like he was, “Sorry it's not all fancy. I’m a simple man sweetheart with simple taste.” his southern drawl croons out. 

Comments erupt in the chat “Raw. Next Question”

“Can he be anymore perfect?”

“Ain't nothing like a good ole southern man.”

“Thank you Rei.” you give him a smile and move to the next one. Your next player was Connie. He smiled big at you, legs bouncing with excitement as you approach. “Oh Lord here we go.” you giggle. “Connie Springer, do I want to know what’s in your locker today?” you ask him as you approach. “Come ooon, don't do me like that mamacita. I got some good stuff in here.” He bounces over to the door and swings the door open. If Reiner was all things order, Connie was everything chaos. 

His locker was packed to the brim, clothes stuffed into the corners. “And you wonder why you can never find anything for practice.” Jean said from across the room. Laughs echo across the locker room as Connie smacks his lips. “Whatever man. Your locker sucks. Mamacita, mira.” he turns your attention back to him. His locker door held chains with different charms, one holding the number 13. A horseshoe hung on the other side. “Y estas aquí son mis milagros. My charms from mi abuela y my tio. Son las cosas más importantes para mí.” he explained showing each charm to the camera. Again comments roll in.

“I don't know what he said but yes.”

“Can I have him please?” 

“BOOMSHAKALAKA YES LAWD!”

“Thank you C Springz. That's beautiful.” you say to him. You continue through several other players who give you different glimpses of themselves. Eren showing you his collection of skull jewelry to Armin sharing his favorite reads. You were just about to wrap up when your eyes landed on Ony. He leaned back against the bench watching you work the room. Your heartbeat thrummed in your chest as you did you best to keep your composure. His massive frame stretched out, relaxing and a small glint in his eyes. You took an unsteady step closer to him. “You can come over here. I won't bite.” his deep voice rang in your ears. 

“What I wouldn't give to be her right now!”

“OH MY GOD IS HE GOING TO DO A VIDEO!?”

“I’m so glad I didn’t scroll.”

“God, it's me again.” 

Comments scroll so fast it was hard to keep up with them. “Whoa, look who’s being a team player today.” Connie lets out. Other players try not to be so obvious with their shock but they mask it poorly. “Okay. Looks like we get a special treat today. The Beast himself is coming out of hiding.” you say softly. A small smirk curves at the corner of his lips. “Care to share what you’re hiding in there?” you ask nodding your head towards his locker. “Bet.” he says, standing and walking to his locker door, effortlessly drawing attention to himself. 

The door of his locker opens with a clank and squeaks open and the room was silent. 

The camera zooms in and widened eyes fill the room, no one expecting what they were seeing. Bright wonky stick figures drawn on white printer paper with old crayons littered the door. Scribbled names of “me and daddy” and “our family” written on the bottoms of each little masterpiece. Handmade “#teamony” craft magnets holding them together. 

“OMG ARE THOSE KID DRAWINGS?!”

“DOES HE HAVE CHILDREN?!”

“ONY WHY YOU CHEATING ON ME?”

Comments blur the screen at rapid speed. But when the camera zooms in closer, there is an eruption of energy underneath your skin. Because right underneath the lens of the live footage, pictures of his most kept secret were revealed. Images of him with a little boy holding a tiny football, selfies with a brown skin girl with slick back puffs, and then there they were. Pictures of Ony with his arms wrapped around none other than…you.

Printed selfies of you and him decorated the door. Selfies of you from date nights to casual Sundays at home during the offseason. Your face was plastered all over his locker room door. Beautifully captured domestic life shots of you, your kids, and your husband were being revealed across social media. Your cheeks heat up and skin tingled at the moment. The view count tripling. 

The locker rooms was dead silent. 

The revelation was jaw dropping. The sweet energetic social media manager they’ve grown to love and their number one player they respected and adored. Together? “W-wait…so y’all are…” Connie tries to find the words but for once was rendered speechless. “This.” Ony speaks up. “Is my motivation. These people right here. My kids Ocean and Oryan, and my beautiful wife Y/N. That's who I’m playing for.” His eyes find yours.  “Every Sunday, I put my all on the field but my heart is forever theirs.” Your chest rises and falls and you have to will the tears away. The man they knew as the beast, a tough no nonsense type of player revealing a piece of him he held so dear to his heart.

“So this is not like…a prank or anything? This is real life. Y/N is your wife?” Eren speaks out, trying to wrap his mind around the truth. Ony’s gaze stays locked on yours, pride and admiration sparkle in his irises. “Nope. This is who I play for. Who I win for.” he emphasizes walking closer to you. You try to keep the butterflies in your stomach at bay as he nears. His teammates look at you both in awe, a blanket of tension building between the two of you on camera. The views continued to sky rocket, reaching the highest the social media team has ever seen but the only thing you were focused on was your husband. The man formerly known as the beast, a feared titan amongst men, was no beast at all. He was a father, a partner, a simple being behind all the physical prowess. 

“Damn O, you been hiding a whole family from us. That’s crazy.” Jean called out. The live content that was mean to be used for snippets later slowly shifted from a what’s in my locker to all things Ony and the followers were eating it up. Comments ablaze with questions about this newfound discovery. 

“How long she been with my man?”

“How old are the babies?” 

“Chat, is this real?”

“So, what’s up? How long has this been going on?” Eren asked. “Yeah, and have we met your kids? CAN WE MEET YOUR KIDS?” Connie jumps up and walks closer. Ony chuckles to himself. “If that's okay with wifey,” he says walking up to you and wrapping an arm around your waist, pulling you into him. “Then y’all came meet them after the next game.” He looks down in your eyes. “That fine with you beautiful?” he asks softly. “Y-yes. That's okay.” you respond. Gone was the gung ho attitude from before replaced with a bashful softness only your husband normally sees.

His teammates stood there taking in the moment. Seeing a new side of Ony was something they weren’t expecting but in their hearts, they felt a shift. The leader of the team whose tough exterior stepped in the room before he did was revealing a deeper side of him resonating not only with his teammates but with every follower that was on the live.

THE LIVE!

Your mind was so wrapped up in your man that you didn't even register that you all were still rolling. You quickly turned towards the camera. “Well I hope y’all enjoyed this segment and we will catch you all in the next video.” you start to end it. Comments rushing in to tell you to keep it rolling but you knew that  you needed to wrap up and do it quickly. “TEAMNAME Signing off. See yall next week.” Ony finishes it off for you, arm tossed around your shoulder.

As the video finished, you tell the team to cut off the cameras but the energy in the room still buzzed around, still vibrating off your skin. Ony let you go and closed his locker door softly. He tosses his bag over his shoulder and walks back to you, planting a gentle kiss to your forehead. “So…that was unexpected.” you say meeting his gaze. “What can I say? Got to keep things interesting. Don't want you to get bored of me.” he smirks at you. “I could never get bored with you.” you say softly, your lips pressing against his. 

Connie walks up behind you clearing his throat. “A-aye Ony man.” he starts. “I just wanted to say eres una inspiración big bro. We all go out and do what we gotta do on the field. But this,” he swipes his hand out gesturing towards you. “This is real shit amigo." “I appreciate lil bro. Forreal.” Ony daps him up and pulls him into a hug. You bite back your smile at the overwhelming love he was receiving. Being a football player’s wife was not easy but things like this made it all worth while. 

For the first time in a long time, your husband allowed himself to be truly seen and it made your heart swell with joy. Slowly the room starts to settle down and people begin to head home. You wait for Ony to finish packing his bag so that you could leave together. “Oh shoot my phone.” you say to him. As he waits for you, you rush into your office to get your phone from the desk. The minute you picked it up, your screen was flooded with notifications.

The video had went viral. Shares, comments, and memes overtook your feed. People had found your personal page from the video and were following you. Comments about brand opportunities and business along with outpourings of love filled your inbox. You stood there for a moment to take it all in. Several sports pages showcasing headlines about

“The Real Ony” 

“Ony’s Family Revealed”

“Onyankopon and Y/N: The Beauty Behind the Beast.”

That one made a laugh escape your chest. Major sports networks were sharing all about this small encounter. “Hey, you good baby girl? I lost you in here?” Ony’s head peeked around the corner of your office. You slip your phone in your pocket and meet him at the door. “Nope. Right here with you baby.” you say to him.

Later that evening, after tucking your kids into bed, you lay up under your husband and clear out more notifications. “This is going to be a field day trying to get through.” you mumble, mind already working overtime. Blogs wanted inside scoops about everything, your relationship, your kids, etc. Everyone wanted to know the story. “Uh uh. No working in bed.” he says snatching the phone from your hand and putting it on his nightstand. “But…” you start to argue but he pulls you close and kisses the disagreement from your lips. “No buts. We handle it tomorrow. Together.” he reassures you. You cuddle in close to him. “I still can't believe you did that, you know? I thought you were okay with keeping it quiet. What made you change your mind?” You ask laying on his chest. 

He was quiet for a moment. 

“It was about time I showed everyone my heart.” he shrugs, puling you closer. 

And as you lay there, listening to the gentle beating of his heart you settled with one thing. No one. And you mean no one would ever forget this. The day Ony, the beast who played for his family, showed that his heart was as big as his game.

[kaisfruit]

Hello love! I love your posts so much and I was wondering if I could request a Cole smut one shot? I mean, I saw your head canons and you said you could go on for longer, girl please do!??

Starved | Cole x Fem!Reader

A/N; I DONT KNOW U TWO, BUT U TWO ANONS MWAH !!! I LOVE U GUYS! i wanted to go so in depth w cole cuz i am unbelievably attrracted to that man i aint afraid to admit it. also, neither of yall specified BUT! im going w fem!reader since u both came from the fem!reader hcs <3

warnings; nsfw under the cut <3, cunnilingus, size kink, pussy drunk cole, unprotected p in v (pls wrap it b4 u tap it yall), probably some typos/grammar mistakes cuz i am way too scared to ask anyone to read this beforehand, and uhh i think that's it!

word count; 4.4k (i may have gotten a bit carried away im sorry yall)

Dinner was a favorite time amongst the ninja. It was time to unwind, to have fun, and enjoy each other's company. You had been chatting idly to Lloyd, who sat to your right, for a majority of the time. He was a bit quieter compared to some of the others (full shade to Jay, Kai, Cole, and Nya) and it seemed as if the mundane practice of just a normal conversation was a great relaxer for the green ninja, so he was definitely one of your preferred dinner companions. That didn’t mean there wasn’t chaos going on around you guys. Jay, who was to your left, seemed to be in a full shouting argument with Kai who sat directly across from the blue ninja. The topic of their angry musings was unknown to you, but Lloyd kept making commentary on it every now and again which you would happily add onto.

Across from you sat Cole, then to his left was Nya, and the head of the table was occupied by Zane while opposite him on the other end sat Pixal. Zane seemed content to exist in the company of all of you, only chiming in when he felt like it was needed, but he and Nya were definitely whispering jokes to each other every now again between bites of their food. Pixal, you noticed, was actually jokingly joining in on Kai and Jay’s argument. She would add in one point that was completely absurd and it would cause the other two to blow up again. That robot could be devious when she really wanted to be.

Then there was Cole. You were surprised that he wasn’t also a part of the argument, but you suppose the topic of…maybe devil worship? You weren’t sure, but still, whatever it was didn’t seem to interest the earth ninja. To be fair, you knew the other was prone to getting entranced into whatever he was eating at the moment and Zane had done wonderfully with tonight’s dinner (as he always did) so it was understandable really. 

“And, yeah, I don’t know. I just don’t really understand why I’ve always got to be doing something.” Lloyd finished his story up and you nodded along, having listened intently the entire time. 

“I don’t know either man,” you shrugged as you took a sip of your water, “your shit is always getting rocked one way or another.” That caused a slight snort of amusement to exit the green ninja. “I mean, I would’ve already changed my government name and gone into hiding if I were in your shoes.”

Lloyd let out a sigh. “That’s the dream. I don’t know if I could do all of that. Couldn’t leave you guys behind at all. That’d suck big time. Ninjago should just get its shit together so we can have some slice of life anime lives.” You nodded enthusiastically at that idea.

“Ooo yeah. And then we could have like fun drama like…what outfit am I going to wear tomorrow or oh no my hair is so bad!” 

“Yes! You’re getting it.” Lloyd grinned. “I think I should get a cat.” His mind wandered constantly, so you were only slightly jarred by the sudden conversation change. “I’ve heard that their purrs do some sort of healing and I could for sure use some of that.”

“I think we’d all like having a cat around.” You added on. “They’re sort of independent, so it would be a good pet for our lifestyle.”

Lloyd was about to respond to you, y’know how conversations work, when all of a sudden Jay slammed his palms onto the table as the “argument” had escalated. It caused the table to shake and before you could stop it your water glass had fallen down and drenched your shirt. You let out a loud gasp which quickly caught the attention of everyone.

“Oh my God, [name], I’m so sorry!” Jay began profusely apologizing, scrambling about the table to find some napkins. Kai was howling with laughter just happy to not be the one who fucked something up. Lloyd was a bit in shock, Zane and Nya had both gotten up to grab some towels from the kitchen with Pixal not far behind, and Cole seemed to be frozen. You were too caught up in the water seeping through your clothes to notice, but the ninja sat opposite you seemed to have his eyes locked onto you, his body tense.

“Jay, it’s fine.” You quickly reassured as you stood up, Cole’s eyes following the movement carefully, “I’ll just go get changed. It’s no big deal.” You tried giving the blue ninja a comforting smile, but you could tell the guilt was already eating him alive and it’d be hard to get him out of that state for a while. You’d try again later, you decided.

Letting those who had left to the kitchen know where you were going, you made your way to your room with your arms held awkwardly in the air so that the weird feeling of the wet fabric wouldn’t be sticking to your skin too bad. Before you could forget, you made a quick stop by the bathroom in order to grab a towel from the cabinet.

Finally having made it to your room, you were quick to tug your shirt off and throw it somewhere on the floor. A sigh of relief left your lips as you began to dry off your top half with the previously acquired towel. With a frown, you removed your bra as well since the water had made it to that garment too and once you were sure your skin felt dry you dropped the towel onto your bed and you made your way to your closet.

You were bent over getting into your dresser looking for a new bra when you heard a knock on the door.

“Who is it?” You called over your shoulder, still digging around in the dresser. 

“Uhhh Cole! Is it okay if I come in?”

“I’m sort of changing right now!”

“I won’t look!”

You huffed out a laugh at that. It was sort of indecent to let him in when you were like that, but he did promise not to look. But what if he did? That thought caused your cheeks to heat up a bit. To be completely honest, you were almost entirely head over heels for the earth ninja. The only reason you didn’t choose to spend every dinner chatting to him is because you knew part of you would slip up and embarrass yourself in one way or another. Not to say he didn’t do his fair share of embarrassing himself, but you found that endearing. He’d probably think you were weird and off putting if you were to just slip up randomly. 

“Fiiinneeee!” You agreed against your better judgment. “No peeking!”

You could hear a chuckle rumble from the man as the faint sound of the door clicking open hit your ears. Chancing a glance behind you, you smiled fondly at the sight of Cole with his hands over his eyes as he shut the door behind him. He stood completely still after that too scared to make his way to a place to sit with him completely blind like that.

“Soooo, what’s up?” You finally asked, trying to not get irritated at the fact that you couldn’t seem to find another bra in your dresser.

“I just wanted to check in on you.” Cole answered, his voice strained. “I’ll gladly beat Jay up for you. Swear.” That had you giggling.

“You’d beat Jay up over anything.” You rolled your eyes. “You’re just looking for an excuse to.”

“Nuh uh.”

“You can take a seat, y’know.” You changed the topic, about damn near close to giving up and just going braless (you wouldn’t actually. It sounded comfortable, but you didn’t want to expose yourself like that.)

Cole cleared his throat slightly. “No way! I’d totally bump into like a shelf or something!! All of your shit would be broken and then I’d have to beat myself up after beating up Jay!”

Another laugh escaped you at that. Was all of it made funnier by the fact that it was Cole? Maybe. Afterwards, you went silent as your mind began racing. This could be your chance? Would he think it’s weird?

“Hey, I,” you bit your lip in a pause, “I don’t mind if you open your eyes…” You finally spoke, getting ready to just laugh it off like it was just a joke. What a prankster you are!

Cole seemed to go oddly silent after you said that and you were sweating bullets. The tension that filled the room was suffocating. Quickly, you snapped up with your back still to Cole. That action was followed by the sound of footsteps almost as if the other ninja had begun walking closer.

You were about ready to apologize profusely when Cole’s low voice broke the silence, “can I ask you something, [name]?”

“Anything…” You murmured, still facing the other way.

“Can I…” There was a pause, an eerily similar pause to the one you had earlier. He was hesitant as he seemed to be fighting some inner battle.

Without thinking, you quickly turned around not caring about your current topless situation and you pulled Cole down in order to plant a fierce kiss to his lips. You were about to apologize for your impulsivity and how you should’ve asked first and not assumed, but Cole’s hands came to rest on your waist and he let out a low groan as he melted into the kiss.

You weren’t small by any means, but it was making your knees weak at the feeling of his hands just absolutely dwarfing your waist. Those hands pulled you closer to where your chest was pressed against him and the feeling of the bulge in his pants against your hips caused you to gasp which he took advantage of and slipped his tongue into your mouth. You let out a small whine at the action, but quickly reciprocated even if you let him have control of the kiss.

Eventually, the need for air arose and you reluctantly parted with him, a string of saliva connecting the two of you. His eyes searched yours, as if something in your gaze held the answer to every question he had ever asked, as his hands slowly wandered to the area beneath your ass. After a bit of panting between the two of you, the kiss quickly resumed and he lifted you up easily causing your stomach to do flips. You wrapped both of your legs around his back and took appreciation in the new angle as it was much easier than having him lean down as much as he was.

The kiss broke as his lips began trailing downward. A shiver ran down your spine at the sensation of his lips on your neck and your breath hitched as he lightly nipped and sucked at the skin there.

“You’re gorgeous…” He breathed against your neck.

Between your harsh intakes of breath, you eventually got out, “Cole, I need you.” Which caused another low groan to escape him.

“You don’t know how many times I’ve thought about hearing that come from your lips.” Cole had begun walking over to your bed and gently sat you down atop it as he crawled on top of you. He had barely even done anything, but you already felt like your brain was turning into mush. The sight of his body hovering over yours is something you’ve only ever dreamed about and you subconsciously rubbed your thighs together. That movement caught his attention, but he had to pace himself. Make sure everything was alright with you. You were operating at hyperspeed, however, and began reaching to the hem of his shirt. That didn’t go unnoticed by him either and he was quick to yank the material up and over his head. He flung the shirt onto the floor of your room as you laid there, stunned, at the sight of his body.

Cole was, well you knew he was big, but he was beefy. Clearly, he was muscular, but he had some chubbiness going for him as well and, God, you don’t know if you’ve ever needed anyone more. He was perfect. You started to sit up so that you could absolutely just feel him up, but he didn’t let you get up. Instead, he ran his hands down your stomach towards your shorts. You looked at him confused and he just leaned in close, his breath fanning across your ear.

“I want to make this about you.” His hands had successfully unbuttoned and zipped down your shorts. “Call me selfish, but I need to make you feel good. What kind of man would I be if I didn’t treat you like the finest piece of cake in the damn bakery?” To many, that’d be a cause for laughter, but knowing Cole, that meant everything. He slowly pulled away from your ear and you couldn’t help but look at him with the purest look of adoration after that. Even in a situation as intimate as this, he still managed to get the butterflies in your stomach to go haywire.

Cole slowly slid your shorts down your legs and off of your body. They probably ended up somewhere near where his shirt did. His eyes were transfixed at the wet spot that had formed on your underwear and he found himself subconsciously licking his lips. You, on the other hand, were staring at him with anticipation wondering what his next move would be. Gingerly, his hands came to rest on your waist and you shivered. His thumbs hooked into the last garment you had on, but he paused to look up at you. His eyes were searching yours once more.

“Is this okay?” He finally asked, his voice soft. Your enthusiastic nod put him into action and he quickly slid your panties off of your legs.

Cole could’ve sworn he was fucking salivating at the sight of your core fully exposed to him. He placed his hands underneath your knees and used that position to spread your legs open for ease of access. Knowing he still had his pants on, you were curious to what his current plan was until your eyes widened as you watched his head lower to rest between your thighs. Your face was flushed red and you could feel yourself trembling slightly. What he was about to do was just so…intimate? It felt more like a once the relationship has officially started activity, but it seems he wasn’t even kidding when he said he’d treat you like cake. Was he trying to ruin you for anyone else? (As if you’d want anyone else.)

The breath was knocked out of you as he took one small lick of you. You could’ve sworn you heard a noise escape him as well, but you weren’t given time to even think as he instantly dove back in. He had started eating you out like a man starved. His tongue moved along your pussy masterfully, making careful movements along your clit which caused punctuated whines to escape your mouth. You couldn’t help but reach a hand down to rest on the back of his head which he seemed to enjoy. Cole then made his tongue flatten out in order to lap up as much of your juices as possible. As if this wasn’t enough to get his fill, his tongue finally plunged into your hole and a gasp left your lips that slowly morphed into a low moan. This man was eating you up and you’re pretty sure your mind was completely gone by this point. What was your name? Who cares? Cole was giving you pleasure you had never experienced before and that’s literally all that mattered at this point. If your head wasn’t so far up in the clouds, you probably would’ve noticed that Cole was grinding up against the bed as he ate you out. 

Your grip tightened in Cole’s hair and a moan left his lips which seemed to vibrate along your cunt. 

“C-Cole–” His name was but a mere whimper along your lips and it only encouraged him to move his mouth against you faster. You felt the knot in your stomach twist up as your peak approached. You were practically grinding up against his tongue which Cole enjoyed immensely. He could not get enough and it rewarded him as you practically exploded all over his tongue. He was licking up as much of your climax as he could as you were still shaking in post-orgasmic bliss. Your vision felt blurry at the continued stimulation that carried you down from your high and you were faintly aware of the moans and whimpers making their way out of your throat.

Honestly, you had expected him to stop, but even one orgasm wasn’t enough to satisfy him. Cole was still lost in the taste of your pussy. You felt a bit of pain flare up at the overstimulation and you were trying to gently pull at his hair.

“Cole,” you whimpered, “h…hurts.” That fell on deaf ears as he just continued on. You thought he hadn’t heard you, but a shit eating look was sent your way and you knew he was trying to work you up. 

“Just one more.” He growled along your folds as he moved up to suck on your clit which caused a jolt to travel through your body. It seems as if he had enough of your trembles as his arms came up to rest on your thighs. The position still keeping your legs spread, but his strength kept your lower half still as he continued his ‘feast’. Your moans and whines had definitely picked up in pace at this moment as the pain began to border on pleasure.

Your second orgasm came much faster.

He licked it up just as enthusiastically as he did the first time. You think he probably would’ve tried to keep going for a third time if you didn’t forcefully pull him up this time. There was a sheen of your slick that shined around Cole’s mouth and you looked away slightly in embarrassment. Cole, meanwhile, was licking around his mouth trying to get whatever he had missed. 

Your chest rose and fell rapidly as you attempted to catch your breath after all of that. The shifting of Cole’s body was what finally caught your attention. The ninja was moving himself from above your body to your side and it looked as if he was moving to lay down next to you. All signs of lethargy left your body as you quickly sat up and rested a hand on his chest. Cole stared at you with a tilt of his head, the confusion bubbling within him evident.

“What about you?” You asked, still breathing a bit heavy.

“What about me?” Cole replied a bit dumbly.

“You know…” You muttered, a tad bit embarrassed, but you rested a hand over his painfully hard bulge in his pants. The feeling caused him to shiver and he looked down, realization dawning on him.

“Oh, it’s okay.” He said, picking your hand up and removing it from his crotch. “I said I just wanted to take care of you, right?”

“Yeah you did,” you started, “but I said I need you, didn’t I?” Cole nodded slowly, but a small frown was still on his face.

“Aren’t you tired?”

A sigh left your mouth. “A little, BUT.” You emphasized, noticing how he had opened his mouth to speak after you said that. “God damnit Cole. No way am I going to finally get you into my bed just to have you not dick me down. I don’t care how sensitive I am, I need you to fuck me.” You could barely believe what you had just said, but it got the job done. Albeit a bit slowly.

“...Are you sure? I don’t wanna hurt you…”

“I have never been more fucking sure in my life.”

Seeing as he wasn’t moving, you lunged over to him to begin slipping his basketball shorts down. Noticing your haste, Cole finally started taking initiative. If it’s what you wanted then he just had to give it. With a better method, Cole slipped off his shorts and boxers off together in one swift motion. And, boy, did he not disappoint. EVERY part of him was big, you had just found out. Saliva pooled up in your mouth at the sight of his cock as you couldn’t take your size off of it. If you weren’t so needy, you probably would’ve taken him into your mouth right then and there, but Cole already had a hand on your shoulder forcing you to lay back down as he positioned himself right above you again.

Your pussy was definitely still slick from the mix of your own arousal and Cole’s saliva and he ran a finger between your folds before shoving it into you. His tongue hadn’t been as thick as his finger, but it still wasn’t much to adjust to. The second finger proved to be more filling and your breath was once again escaping in huffs. 

It took a bit until Cole had either thought you ready or just gotten impatient, but he pulled his fingers out of you and lined his dick up with your entrance. A pause. You were about ready to complain until the breath was taken swiftly from your lungs as he slowly pushed in. As he slid in further and further, the more your breaths turned into short moans. It felt as if he filled absolutely every part of you and it was addicting. The stretch hurt, but it was so deliciously overpowered by the pleasure of him finally being inside you. Though, Cole still didn’t even attempt to move until you gave him the go ahead.

From there, he started at a slow but deep pace. It was a sensual experience. Above you, Cole was letting out little huffs and groans at the feeling of your walls around his member. He could explode right then and there if he wanted to. But, he continued at this pace of almost completely removing himself from your hole before pushing balls deep back in. It was excruciating.

“F..fa…faster.” You panted at him. And who would he be if he denied you this request?

The sound of skin slapping skin echoed around the room as Cole slowly began picking up the pace. His hips were pistoning in and out of you at a rapid pace, and you think you finally understood the phrasing of “being fucked stupid.”

Every push in had you moaning loudly. It was either moans or a broken moan of Cole’s name which made him go in a bit harder every time you did that. His head hung low until it was resting in the crook of your neck. The groans and low moans that were leaving the man only turned you on more and you about screamed his name when he bit into your neck. There were no thoughts of anyone here at the monastery hearing you two, as far as you cared, you and Cole were the only people in Ninjago at this point. All of your senses seemed to be completely filled by the man anyways.

The feeling of his licking, sucking, and biting along your neck combined with his rough abuse of your pussy brought you close to your third climax of the night which might be a record for you.

“C-Cole, I’m-I’m close.” You whined, your voice barely audible over the sound of him fucking you.

“God, me too.” He moaned against your neck. Cole was determined to not let go until you had, so he reached a hand down to start playing with your clit as he continued fucking into you. That absolutely sent you over the edge and you screamed as you came all over Cole’s cock. He continued thrusting into you throughout your orgasm which only made it feel that much better. His hips began stuttering in their movements and he was quick to pull himself out of the vice grip your pussy had on him. Cole wrapped a hand around his cock and jerked himself off the rest of the way until his cum started landing on your stomach. He let out tiny grunts as he fucked into his hand a bit before letting go.

You made sure he was looking at you when you scooped up some of his release and licked it off your fingers. He really had to save that image for the next time he masterbated.

Before he even allowed himself to lay down next to you, Cole carefully got up and reached for the towel you had used earlier to dry yourself off and used it to wipe his release off of your stomach, a small ‘sorry’ leaving his mouth as he did so. He was cute. 

Finally, his body dropped harshly at your side and you giggled tiredly at him. Cole rolled over to look at you and you held your arms open, a silent question for him to come cuddle you. 

His strong arms wrapped around your body and you rested your head on his chest, listening to his calming heartbeat. Cole found where your covers started and threw them over the both of you which only made you snuggle in even closer to him.

You two sat there in silence for so long, just catching your breaths, that you nearly fell asleep.

“Hey, [name].” You startled at the sound of his voice. A non-committal ‘hm?’ is what you hummed in response and he just rested his nose on the top of your head in your hair. “Do you want to go on a date with me?”

A content sigh left your lips and you sleepily looked up, causing him to remove his head from its place. “Of course, Cole.” One of your hands slipped out from under the covers and cradled one of his cheeks. You leaned up and placed a gentle kiss on the other cheek. 

“Now, let’s get some sleep. We can talk about the details later.” You said through a yawn and he just smiled at you fondly. You both returned to your previous positions and slowly drifted off, and for once, neither of you felt fear or dread for what was to come in the future.

[burntb4bydoll]

BAE I NEED MORE 2023 BILL STUFF 😭😭😭 PRETTY PLEASE POOKIE 😫

YOU GOT IT BAE🤭🫡

ALSO IM SORRY IF U DONT LIKE THIS!! YOU DIDNT REALLY SPECIFY WHAT YOU WANTED SO I JUST DID THIS IDEA IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT

@ilovebill-and-gustav

2023 Bill Kaulitz x reader whos a member of Tokio Hotel

•yall probably had a super duper sweet childhood friends to lovers type relationship

•he loved you ever since you joined the band but both of you were too young and awkward to realize 😭

•as you grew up, neither of you could hold back your feelings anymore and eventually got together. Everyone was so relieved that you guys FINALLY got together, they were so sick of your obliviousness 💀

•going on tour with him is SO GREAT

•obviously Bill is very fun and energetic, so hanging out with him is always a good time

•he makes you make tiktoks with him😭 also makes you take SO many instagram pictures for him. He also takes a ton of you but you never need to ask him to do it, he already takes them without you asking him

•and ofc you guys share hotel rooms and also share a bed on the tour bus

•everyone likes to joke about how you guys are never seen without each other and both of you always deny it. Butttt literally every time the paparazzi takes pictures of you, he is standing right there too. And you are almost always in every picture he posts

•GETS MATCHING CONCERT OUTFITS WITH YOU

•and he wears his big ass platforms so he gets you some too so that the height difference isnt too much💀

•one time you almost tripped and ate shit while on stage and he laughed for about 5 minutes straight. Like yall had to take a break so that he could get himself together 😭 you were just rolling your eyes the whole time while trying to be mad at him, but it was so funny that you couldn’t help but laugh too

•gives you a kiss between every song🤭 he just gets so excited and filled with adrenaline that he cant help but give you a couple of smooches 😇

•post concert sex is 100% a frequent thing for you two

•and the rest of the band complains the next day because they can hear you through the hotel walls, and yall go on for hours😭

•OMFG YK HOW HE POSTED ABOUT HIS VACATION AFTER THE TOUR? WELL OFC U WERE THERE TOO!!

•he loved spending that alone time with you in such a beautiful place. And he definitely whines when its time to go home because he was having so much fun with you and he didn’t want it to end

•overall yall have such a cute and healthy relationship and hes the best bf ever

[princessanonymous]

omg i just read your vampire story and it’s sooo good😩😩 i had to rewatch interview with a vampire after i read that masterpiece. i do wonder though, what happens to them in the modern age? do they still live in the mansion? do they relocate? does the reader have more permission to go outside? thank youuu <3333

𝓐𝓶𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓼𝓽 ����𝓱𝓮 𝓛𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓰 (Ask)

When Night Comes asks Platonic Yandere Vampire Story Chapter list

So sorry for taking so long!! I was busy with life and when I finally found the time to sit down and write it down, I didn't have the proper time to correct it bcuz of exams... I have one tomorrow but I really just wanted to finally post this. Another ask is probably coming soon but i can't really promise anything since i have a physics exam followed by one in chemistry 3 days later and one in math coming soon too. Life really isn't on my side now!

Still, here it is!

(Also some of yall might have noticed but I like putting these answers into little situation instead of telling it outright. Hope yall dont mind)

(+ This takes place during the cold war. I found it to be fitting.)

┉┈◈◉◈┈┉

“I can’t believe I accepted to stay in this dreadful place,” muttered her father as they walked into the new house they had bought. “This house is too small.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” quipped her dad while shaking his head, “this is what mortal Americans settle with. And they do it quite easily; this is the biggest house in the neighborhood.”

“That is the problem,” groaned her father while they walked through the already furnished house. It was a good thing her parents had paid people to do this tedious task. “We have never lived in a neighborhood before. There is no space! We don’t even have our own forest!”

“You agreed to let the little one choose our next home,” he reminded the other with a sigh. “That is her choice.”

The blond frown in distaste and looked around the living room. “Well I didn’t expect her to choose such a mediocre manor. This is utterly ridiculous.” He pinched the bridge of his noise in annoyance and exasperation as he settled in one of the satin armchairs in the room.

The girl puffed her cheeks, vexed by these words. Yes, it was true the house was smaller than the three other homes they had inhabited in America, it was definitely something she would need to get used to, but that didn’t make it less fun. Ever since they had left their motherland for the new world due to the constant attacks and bombings during the war, her existence had been filled with a neverending kaleidoscope of information and new things to see. America was nothing like England: everything was bigger and people acted so differently. 

She had indeed chosen this manor in Pennsylvania for a reason. It was gloomy and often cloudy there, just like they all preferred it. Additionally, while it was not the size her father was used to, she knew it was big enough for him to not outright refuse her request; they wouldn’t remain here very long though, but she could accept that. 

Most importantly… neighborhoods were filled with other children, and that was really the only thing that really mattered to her. The idea of interacting with others, even if they were mortals, made her giddy. If her father knew the real reason for her insistence on this estate, the girl knew he would refuse instantly, but what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him – or (Y/n).

—---

It took a week before she finally was able to meet people. The day was gloomy and clouds were in the sky, indicating incoming rain. Two boys passed by the house as she was swinging on the swing her parents had ordered installed for her. She watched as they came and went multiple times, playing with their blue ball and almost cackled in glee when one of the boys, the younger one, a boy with red messy hairs and freckles, who looked to be nine years old, threw the ball too far away and it landed close to her. She stood from her swing quickly to pick up the ball and stood–

“Careful!” warned the older, a boy with dark skin and brown eyes, who only looked slightly older than she did. The girl suspected he might be thirteen or fourteen.

It was too late, because not even a second later, she felt the seat of the swing collide with her back and she fell on the floor. The two boys ran to her; the youngest holding the swing as the older one helped her stand up. She winced, hoping her father hadn’t heard the commotion; she knew he would be mad if learned she was interacting with mortals. She didn’t want to be confined to her room for a year like he had done before.

The girl shuddered at the memory. Maybe trying this wasn’t a good idea; if he found out, he would surely do worse, he had promised it last time. She didn’t want to leave, she didn’t want to remain confined again.

She hated how cold and lonely and empty her room felt when it was the only thing she saw for months, she–

“You alright there?” Asked the oldest with his brows furrowed, unaware of the fact that he had snapped her out of her spiraling thoughts.

She nodded, still dazed and gave them their ball. They thanked her and the other mortal asked, “Are you living here? Nobody’s seen the new inhabitants yet. Mom says it’s impolite to not even greet anybody after moving in. Mom said only communists would do such an impolite thing.”

(Y/n) squirmed, embarrassed by these words. She didn’t know anything about neighborly etiquette. Should she have researched the subject before? She doubted her father was informed on that matter, but perhaps her dad knew more; he had always been more aware of mortal things than they were. 

The older glared at the youngest and lightly slapped the back of his head. “Rem, you can't just say that!”

“You heard her say it too!” Protested the redhead in outrage, ready to defend his statement.

The older one sighed and shook his head before rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment. “Excuse my step-brother, Jeremy; he doesn’t know what he’s saying. I’m Kenneth. We live just across from here.”

A smile graced her features again. "My name is (Y/n)," she introduced herself with a graceful tilt of her head, her voice carrying a controlled and melodic cadence, "how do you do? I live here with my fathers." She had to make a good impression.

Jeremy narrowed his eyes. “You have an accent,” he noted in fascination. “Where are you from? You're not a communist, are you? Mom said we can't speak to those.”

(Y/n) sensed some mistrust coming from him, and she quickly used her empath abilities to soothe him before his words registered in her mind. (Y/n)'s expression faltered for a moment, a hint of confusion clouding her features before she shook her head lightly. “I don’t have an accent,” she denied while pointing at him, “You do have an American accent though.”

The redhead shook his head in disbelief, crossing his arms over his chest in a gesture of defiance. “Americans don’t have accents, silly,” he retorted with a grin, his eyes alight with amusement.

But (Y/n) wasn't about to let the matter go so easily. She protested adamantly, insisting that she could clearly hear the distinct nuances in his speech. Back and forth they bantered, neither willing to concede their stance on the matter  before eventually realizing they wouldn’t agree on that matter. 

"But where are you from?" he asked, his tone gentle yet insistent, "You're not from here, are you?"

She shook her head. "No, I was born in England,” she revealed, her voice carrying a faint trace of longing for her homeland. She still missed England dearly. She knew vampires typically never spent more than a century in the same country, but she had still been devastated when her parents had decided to leave; even more when they sailed to a different continent altogether. 

Jeremy looked starstruck, their small innocuous disagreement already far behind in his mind, thanks to her abilities. "Really? Did you ever meet the queen?" he asked eagerly, his imagination already running wild with visions of royal encounters and grand palaces. 

She giggled at that, then tilted her head, contemplating the question. After a brief moment of contemplation, she realized that he was likely referring to Queen Elizabeth II, rather than Queen Victoria. "No, never," she replied with a casual shrug, noting the slight disappointment that flickered across Jeremy's face at her response.

"Hey, wanna join us tomorrow at two o'clock? We'll be down this street with all the neighborhood kids. Probably going to play Hide-and-seek.”

(Y/n) smiled warmly at the invitation, her curiosity piqued by the prospect of joining in with the neighborhood kids. "Sure, I'd love to!" she replied eagerly, the thought of meeting new mortals outweighing any concerns she might have had about the unfamiliar game they mentioned.

Although she had never heard of Hide-and-seek before, (Y/n) was undeterred. As she agreed to meet them the following day at two o'clock, her mind was already buzzing with anticipation. (Y/n) knew she would have to find a way to sneak out without her fathers noticing, but she was determined not to let that stop her from joining in on the fun. With a mischievous glint in her eye, she began plotting a way to sneak out, confident that she could pull it off.

[shreddeddescent]

OKAY!!!!

okay. so. i want to share this for anyone who is like.... cool about this worst case scenario bullshit i keep talking about. i think im writing it kinda good or at least in a compelling way, and honestlyyyy i just wanna post shit to be like hey. im having fun with it, and i think its really interesting to see how it all turns out. i think its been fun every other time ive posted about it, you guys seem to like it, but this is the part that will come off the most weird. if you dont know, ive tagged all previous things in this timeline as #wcs (worst case scenario)

so i think yall get this is like. the fucked up timeline. but like that its the going to be okay timeline too.

to explain more about it if you dont know, lets just say like. shredder did the fucked up thing he wanted. i think ive made that clear in previous posts about this. shredders dead now. they had to deal with the consequences of what he did to them. if the implications of that squick you out its totally fine. if youre not sure what i mean, im sorry. you DO NOT need to read further. but theres nothing specific about it here, this is just alllll the result of that. the results will be made clear by the end.

they went to big mama's hotel to get help from her with said consequences. its been dealt with. theyre now just recovering, being normal kids, still going to therapy. they're coping. but big mama's help always comes with a cost, but they havent figured out what that cost was yet.

so like. its been fun to explore in writing. IF YOURE WILLING to hear me out about all the fucked up shit turning out okay, feel free to read further. even if it sounds weird. i hope everyone can just be like.... respectful.

this doesnt have to be canon to the rest of my au, but if youve enjoyed it when ive talked about it....this is a big reveal shit for that timeline. if you are cool about everything im implying so far.

if youre not, again, you dont have to read forward. this isnt mature rated or anything, its just the implications of what the characters have been through are dark.

but the characters are going to be okay. and this right here is the reason they will be.

okay? okay. please be fucking nice.

missing context would be: raph saw someone in their room the night before, but he thinks he made it up. donnie also saw what he thinks was a ghost.

they went out for breakfast, and raph saw a turtle yokai he couldnt help but chase to the elevator who said her name was jennika, but she really wouldnt look him in the eye. and then they all discussed whether shredder had another experiment done before they existed.

questioning their origins, donnie and mikey scout the pool for recon as leo and raph come back from their joint therapy session with big mama.

--

The elevator door opened and they stepped out into the pool area. It seemed to be a rooftop pool, but the elevator had felt like it was going down. The view was the highest they’d seen, and yet the air was warmer than it had been in their room. And there was no wind, unlike their room.

They looked around and spotted their brothers, Donnie was sitting on the edge of the pool with his feet in, looking at his phone, while Mikey was doing laps.

Leo grabbed Raph’s arm and the two of them wandered over.

“Hey guys.” He said. “How’s the mission going?”

Donnie looked up and looked around. “No other turtles spotted here.”

Mikey jumped out of the water with a splash. “Yeah, just old people really. I don’t think they liked us.”

“You were doing cannonballs, that's why.”

Raph wandered over to the edge of the roof, resting his hands on the railing and staring out at the city. It was so high. Higher than fathers tower was. In fact he could see Foot Tower in the distance, dwarfed by this view.

He was above it. He was beyond it. But god were they ever high.

He felt Leo walk up behind him. “I hate this view.”

He sighed and nodded. “I’m surprised I don’t feel sick. I hate heights.”

He felt him step beside him and press his shoulder against his. “I know what you mean… it’s like it’s not a real height. There’s none of that wind whipping in your face. Like a big realistic dome with a view.”

Raph nodded, squinting out at the view. “The feeling of the window was freezing.. like ice. And here there’s no wind at all.”

“Me and Slash got Big Mama to tell us there’s some kind of cross dimensional portals between the floors.. that there’s protection magic around the floors. I wonder if something broke the one by our window.”

Raph tapped his fingers against the railing.

“Maybe…”

“You okay..?”

He looked up at him nervously.

“I’m… scared, honestly.. and I’m not sure why.”

Leo smiled down at him. “We’re gonna be okay. We got this, partner.” He held out his fist for a bump.

Raph ignored it to give him a tight hug.

Leo rubbed his back lightly and looked back over at the twins.

“Should we get the raisins out of here? Or do you want more recon?”

Raph sighed and let go. “I think I’d like to stay out of the room for a while. Try and relax.”

“Didn’t bring a bathing suit. Mikeys got those shorts, but you’re wearing jeans.”

Raph shook his head and looked around at what other yokai were wearing. Some were in bathing suits, others looked more naked from what he could tell.

He wasn’t sure if he was comfortable being naked though, shell or not.

“Maybe I’ll just sit.” He said as he spotted a lounge chair to the side.

Leo walked past him to go talk to the twins again and he watched them. He felt like a mom again. Out with her kids. At least he didn’t look like Splinter this time. Bathrobe and all.

It was about noon and the sun was shining, so it was getting busier the longer they stayed out here. But he just sat in the warm sun and let himself feel calm, he watched Mikey try and splash Donnie to coax him in, watched Leo strip down to his sweatpants to wrestle with their baby brother in the pool.

At some point Donnie wandered over to hand him his electronics and he smiled at him.

“You wanna get in?” Raph asked him, surprised.

He shrugged. “Might as well live in the moment for once. It is a nice day, and we’re not too weird here.”

“You want me to help you with your braces?”

“Nah, I’ll need them. I don’t care if they get wet.” He pulled his hoodie off and Raph stared at him. He never went anywhere without something on his chest.

He was surprised how weird it felt to see him like that in public. Donnie was somewhat round like Raph, but had more masculine features, for a turtle. But no muscle definition. Even in the cage he’d been wearing his hoodie. But he was feeling more free right now. Maybe this place was good for them.

Donnie pointed at his phone and headphones.

“If you don’t wanna join, you can like... Read or listen to music. There’s free wifi here.”

Raph hummed and put the headphones on.

“Thanks Donnie…”

He shrugged and made his way into the pool to try doing laps. Which for him was holding the edge the whole time.

Raph eyed the phone and looked through his music. Not much he recognized. He found Queen though, and decided to play that and close his eyes. Letting himself be a turtle basking in the sunlight for about 20 minutes.

He sensed someone sit near him and opened his eyes.

A tall furry lion Yokai was in his sunlight, looking down at him.

And suddenly he felt uncomfortable.

They seemed to be talking to him so he pulled the headphones off.

“Huh?”

“I said kinda a weird look for the pool. The jeans.”

Raph looked down at himself and back up.

“Yeah. Wasn’t planning on coming to the pool.”

He gestured over to his brothers with his head.

“Those your kids?”

Raph furrowed his brows and looked over at his brothers. They seemed to be having fun splashing each other.

“Kinda, yeah?”

“Huh. That one your… husband?”

Raph felt his face flush as he looked over at Leo.

“No, that’s my brother.”

He raised his brows and smirked. “So you’re a single mom?”

‘Female female female!’

His body felt cold despite the heat from the sun.

“Sorry, bet they dragged you out here without a bathing suit. Shame, you look like you’ve got a good figure…”

‘You’re going to get assaulted again!’

His heart was pounding in his chest. He looked in Leo’s direction desperately, needing someone to help him.

“Hey kid.” A deep familiar voice behind him said as he felt a hand on his shoulder.

The lion looked over him nervously.

Raph watched as the backside of a tall muscular turtle stepped into view, shielding him from the Lion’s gaze. They were wearing flowery swim trunks.

“That’s my son you’re talking to. He’s 17. Do I need to call security?” The voice said angrily. “Or are you gonna fuck off?”

Raph tried to quiet his beating heart. He felt like he might throw up. He felt like Slash might jump out.

And yet… This turtle made him feel safe.

“U-uh no problem man! My bad!” The lion quickly rose up and left. And the turtle took the chair and sat down beside him.

Raph looked at him nervously.

Broad shouldered and maybe 30 years old, his skin was a dull light green, his plastron wide and pointier than Raph had ever seen. Thick legs and strong arms. He looked tired but smiled warmly at him with wide, kind eyes.

“Are you okay?”

Raph stared at him nervously, pressing his hand to his chest.

“I-I might be having a panic attack…” he said softly.

The turtle reached out to offer his hand.

“You want me to count for breathing?”

Raph nodded quickly, taking his hand.

“In one two three four… out one two three four...”

He closed his eyes and followed the turtle's instructions. After a few minutes he felt okay again and stared down at the hand in his.

Two fingers. Their hands were so similar, but his were much larger.

He looked up at his face. He’d seen those eyes.

In the dark.

“It’s.. it’s you.”

He grunted softly in affirmation.

“You keep trying to get into trouble.”

Raph stared at him hard. He wanted to look away but he was terrified the man would disappear.

“What.. What's your name?”

“Kirby.”

“W-why are you following me? Why were you…”

“I just said you keep getting into trouble.”

Raph felt his eyes water as he stared at him.

“I-I’m not trying to, I thought I could just… be out in public, but I guess I’m too much of a s-slut…”

Kirby winced and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and holding Raph's hand in both of his, staring at him so kindly.

“You’re not. People always want to take advantage of you. I’m sorry, it’s not fair.”

“W-why do you know that..? W-who are you..?”

He shook his head. “Just someone who cares.”

“D-do you know Jennika..?”

He laughed. A familiar laugh. “Yeah. We know each other.”

“Why… why did she cry when she looked at me?”

He shrugged. “She’s got complicated feelings. Hard to explain.”

“I-I’m not scared of you. I should be, I don’t know you…”

“You kinda know me though.” He said, a weird glint in his eye.

Raph grunted and stared at him frustrated. “Why are you so vague and annoying?”

He laughed and shook his head. “I don’t know. Ah. Leo’s noticed. You should be fine now.” He pulled away from his grasped hand.

“Hey!” They heard Leo yell from the edge of the pool.

Raph didn’t turn. He watched Kirby bolt up and give him a salute before disappearing into the crowd, he presumed to the elevator.

Raph just stared blankly at the space he’d been.

Leo sat in front of him, dripping wet and waving his hand in front of his face.

“Are you okay?! Did he hurt you?!”

Raph looked up at him and shook his head slowly. “No… h-he… uh, saved me..? There was.. a guy trying to…” he closed his eyes and winced. “He saved me.” He looked back at Leo, who looked worried.

“What did he say? Did you get anything out of him?”

Raph rolled onto his back and stared at the pool.

“His name’s Kirby. He says I keep getting into trouble. He pretended he was my dad to make a guy leave… I.. I felt really safe.”

Leo groaned and lay back on the chair. “What the hell is going on…?”

“I-I didn’t want him to leave..” he whispered and held himself. His heart hurt.

Leo looked at him sadly. “Raph..?”

“I-I knew him… h-he said I knew him…”

Leo frowned and rubbed his neck. “Maybe it’s like.. You said he pretended to be your dad. Maybe it’s not pretend. Maybe he’s our real dad. Maybe he’s our dad, and Jennika’s our mom and that’s where we really came from.”

Raph looked up at him. “Jennika wasn’t female… she.. she had a plastron like you, not me. Her tail was long. A-and dad.. dad was so clear our human stuff is his… They couldn’t have made us.”

He sighed. “Let’s just imagine we get to come from somewhere better though, yeah..?”

He looked up at him sadly and nodded.

“O-okay…”

“Do you want to go back to the room..? Cuz we can go…”

He looked over at the twins and saw they were just splashing each other. It looked fun.

“I.. I wanna join, but…” he looked down at himself. He couldn’t swim in these jeans. It was naked or nothing. And he couldn’t do naked.

Leo smiled and bumped his shoulder.

“Trade pants. These are fine.”

Raph blinked and shook his head.

“Then you’ll be in wet jeans…”

“Eh, it’ll dry.” He picked up a rolled towel from a rack nearby and held it up in front of Raph as a privacy barrier.

“C'mon, you go have fun for a minute.”

He groaned and relented, unzipping his jeans and pulling them off. Leo dropped the towel on his lap for privacy and quickly undid his wet sweatpants and passed them to him. Raph put them on, they were a little snug and too long but it was stretchier than the jeans. Leo put the jeans on and smiled.

“See? Easy. I’ll watch the stuff, you go swim.”

Raph eyed him nervously and unzipped his hoodie.

He wondered if Yokai had weird gender rules even without nipples.

He tried not to let it bother him, Leo was being nice and it would be a waste to make him do all that and then just chicken out.

He tossed the hoodie on the pile and decided to jump in.

He let himself float on his stomach for a while, feeling the refreshing water and the sun on his back. He probably looked like a corpse.

He felt someone jump on him and whipped around, seeing Mikey had decided to clamber on his back.

“Raph’s here!” He cheered and hugged him.

Raph laughed a little and shoved him off. “Careful, I’m not that strong a swimmer.”

He looked around. Leo waved at him from the lounge chair.

Someone splashed him and he turned, seeing Donnie holding on to the side of the pool.

Raph beamed. “Oh? We’re doing a splash off now?”

Donnie yelped and started swimming away.

Raph laughed and chased after him, Mikey was cheering from the center of the pool.

“You can escape Donnie! Kick those legs!”

Raph caught up and waved his arm at him, causing a big splash to hit him in the face.

“Nooooo!” He cried dramatically and pretended to sink.

Raph laughed and dove under water, grabbing him around his middle and standing up straight in the shallow end to carry him over his shoulder.

“I caught you!”

Donnie shrieked and laughed, pounding on the back of his shell. “Stoooop!”

“I’ll save you!” Mikey rammed into Raph who dramatically threw Donnie into the deep end.”

And then Donnie didn’t come back up for too long.

“Shit.” Raph dove down and saw him sinking, he grabbed his arm and swam up, dragging him back to the shallow end of the pool and stood holding him up.

He was sputtering and struggling to breathe.

Raph held him against his chest and climbed out of the pool with him and patted him on his back.

“Cough it up, you’re okay.” Raph tried. He was trying not to freak out and placed him on the ground to sit.

He was still wheezing

Someone touched his shoulder and he turned to see a sweet turtle face smiling sadly at him. “I can help.” She said as she pushed him out of the way and waved her hand in front of Donnie’s chest.

She was gaunt. Her arms and knees were wrapped in some kind of bandages, and she was wearing a strange one piece swimsuit on top that fit around her shell. The shell looked too big for her body, slightly off center.

She waved her two fingered hand from chest up to his nose, and a floating bubble of water came out of Donnie’s mouth and then dissipated on the ground.

Donnie stared at her in awe. “W-water bending?” He was panting and taking croaky breaths.

She laughed a little and smiled, confused.

“I don’t know what that means. Simple magic. Are you okay?”

Donnie was clapping himself on the plastron, trying to breathe without croaking. She rubbed his shoulder.

Raph looked between them. Their skin was the same deep blue green. She looked like she could be his older sister.

“I-I think I’m okay…” he glared up at Raph. “Why would you throw me in the deep end?!”

He kept staring at the woman.

She turned to look at him and gave him a sad smile. “His knees aren’t strong enough to keep himself afloat. Maybe with some practice.”

He kept staring at her. She was his height, and much thinner. But she had the same flat plastron and short tail.

“…how do you know that?” He asked.

She laughed sadly and looked down at her own limbs. “Experience.”

Raph looked down and realized that her feet weren’t actually on the ground. She was hovering 2 inches above it.

Donnie seemed to follow his gaze and his eyes went wide.

“Are.. you the ghost?” He asked quietly.

She turned to look down at him and rolled her eyes. “Do I look like a ghost? I’m quite corporeal.”

Donnie looked up at her frustratedly. “You know what I’m talking about.”

She tapped her chin in thought. “Do I?”

He groaned.

Raph put his hand on her arm gently.

“I.. I know you…” he said quietly.

She turned to look back at him with sad eyes.

“We’ve never met. I’m Venus.”

“I’ve… never met another female turtle…” he couldn’t help but say.

She tilted her head sadly. “No.. I guess you haven’t.”

“I-I’m sorry…” he said suddenly.

He didn’t know why he was sorry.

She laughed a little. “You don’t have to be sorry, it’s not bad to be female.” Then her eyes got sad. “But I guess that’s to be expected…”

Donnie shot up and stepped between them.

“How are you floating? Is that like something you were born with or can you learn? Does it help with weight distribution? Is that why you do it? If I could do that I bet it would help. Oh but then you wouldn’t be exercising your knees…”

She blinked and sighed playfully, placing a hand on her hip. “You are too inquisitive.”

Raph stared between them. They had the same snout. The same smug look on their faces.

“Venus…” he said softly.

She turned to look at him. She saw something in his eye and winced, looking away.

“Anyway, I’m glad you’re okay, kid. Don’t go swimming where you can’t stand up, and keep a brother with you at all times in the water!” She saluted and seemed to float away.

Raph wanted to chase her but he just… let her go.

Donnie groaned and looked at him funny. “She could have taught me magic! Bones don’t hurt magic!”

Raph looked down at him sadly, he knew there were tears in his eyes and Donnie’s expression confirmed it.

“Raph what’s wrong..?”

“Sh-she looked just like you…”

He scoffed and folded his arms. “Hardly. She was thin and agile.”

He shook his head and reached out to touch Donnie’s snout. “She had your snout.. your skin.”

Donnie was looking more nervous as Raph looked at him. He pushed Raph’s hand off him. “She can’t have been my mother. Shredder would have seen her as useless damaged goods. Maybe there’s just.. turtle yokai out there who come in such variety that she somewhat looked like me.”

Raph rubbed his arm. He was right, if she was chronically in pain like Donnie, and small and female like Raph… she would have been dead to their father.

“You’re not sure though…” Raph said. Donnie was making a face.

He sighed. “Hereditary illnesses are a thing, I suppose. But I don’t think she was old enough… unless she was… you know, younger than us when it happened.”

“Which Shredder would never have done, obviously..” Raph rolled his eyes and hugged his arms, turning away.

“Sorry…” Donnie mumbled.

He sighed and looked over. “I’m sorry I threw you in the deep end, I wasn’t thinking about that. I was thinking ‘don’t let him crack his head’ more than I was thinking ‘he needs to hold on to the edge to stay up’.”

Donnie shrugged and leaned against him. “I get it. We’re not used to pools and stuff. Thanks for jumping in after me.”

Raph smiled and rubbed his back. “I mean it would be shitty of me to let you drown don’t you think?”

Donnie grunted and nodded. “Extremely shitty cuz it would have been your fault yeah. Still. Thank you.”

“Are you as done with pool time as I am?”

“Yeeees..” He whined. “Need to recharge.”

Raph laughed and nodded, giving his head a kiss. “Okay.”

They wandered back over to Leo and towelled themselves off, Leo stared up at them questioningly. “How did the recon go? I hope that was what the FAKE drowning was?”

Donnie rolled his eyes as he was letting Raph rub his back dry so he could put his hoodie back on.

“Unfortunately that was a real almost drowning. I am fine, thank you for asking.”

Leo winced and stood up. “Shit, sorry. Are you okay?”

“Fine. She literally water bended the pool water out of my throat. And she was FLOATING! Did you see that?” He couldn’t contain his excitement.

Raph pat his shoulder and decided he should collect Mikey while Donnie got him up to speed.

He turned to the pool and didn’t see him.

Mama turtle went in overdrive.

“Mikey?” He called out, darting between people in the crowd.

The more he looked the more worried he got.

‘Idiot, you almost kill ONE brother and LOSE the other?’

He groaned and smacked his head. “Shut up Slash.”

That was new but he couldn’t blame him.

He did a lap around the pool and saw the backside of a turtle behind the bar to the side. He rushed over and realized this turtle was bigger than him.

“Jennika.” He breathed.

She turned in surprise and he could see Mikey behind her, smiling up at him.

“Oh, hi Raph!”

He whimpered and rushed forward, ignoring her to grab him around his shoulders.

“Where did you go! I was worried!”

He grabbed his arms and pushed him back.

“I’m fine! I made a friend, see?” He held his hand out to Jennika, who was standing awkwardly beside them. She was wearing a big white t shirt and baggy trunks.

“Sorry, you… guys were distracted and I wanted to make sure he was safe somewhere…” she barely looked at him.

That hurt for some reason.

“Thanks…” he stood back up, keeping his hand on Mikey’s shoulder to make sure he knew where he was. “I.. sorry, I shouldn’t.. assume things but. You’re… not female like me, are you..?”

She blinked and shook her head. “Uh… no. I used to be… sad. About that.”

A new emotion came over him and he gave her a look of awe.

“Are you… trans..?”

She gave him a surprised look. “Is that… okay?”

Raph could feel his eyes water but he smiled big. “I… I’ve never met a.. I mean, you’re a turtle like me, and you’re.. trans too! A-and that.. makes me happy, I-I don’t know.. sorry, I’m not… not trying to be weird.”

She smiled and shook her head, her eyes were wet too.

“No, it’s not weird, I really get it…” she rubbed her arm. “I didn’t know uh…” she coughed and shook her head. “No, I guess I’d always hoped you were. I didn’t understand myself.”

Raph was confused by her words but kept smiling at her.

“You’re beautiful.” He told her. He didn’t know why he felt the need to tell her that. It was overwhelming seeing someone like him out in the world.

She stared at him with a shocked smile. Tears were rolling down her cheeks.

“O-oh…” she sniffed and then laughed, rubbing her eyes. “F-fuck, can I hug you? Th-this is a lot but..”

Raph reached in instantly to wrap his arms around her. He just wanted to make her feel as happy as he felt seeing her. She was taller than him and thicker up top, but she was just a beautiful turtle girl to him.

She seemed to be crying above him as she held him back.

Mikey wandered over and smiled up at her. “See, she’s a friend Raph!”

The two of them parted and Jennika got down on her knee to idly punch his shoulder.

“You’re a good judge of character, but you still shouldn’t run off with people. Not here. There’s bad guys here. Only trust turtles, got that little man?”

He made a determined face and nodded. “Got it.”

Jennika then leaned in to hug Mikey. It looked like a bone crushing hug. Mikey just took it and tried to hug her back just as strongly.

Raph looked between them. They looked.. so similar. She looked like if Mikey had been well loved as a child and grown up strong.

The idea was making him cry again.

“Jennika!” They heard a voice call out.

Raph looked over and saw Kirby again. He was standing by the elevator and waving her over, he looked frustrated to see Raph again, and maybe a little sad.

Jennika looked up and wiped her eyes. “Shit. That’s my brother, he’s gonna give me a talking to…” She muttered slightly annoyed.

Raphs eyes snapped up at her. “Kirby’s your brother?”

She winced and rubbed her neck. “Uh, it’s been nice talking!”

She shuffled away.

Raph was shaking suddenly.

“W-wait!” He started to run but they both looked at him inside the elevator with a sorrowful look and then disappeared.

And he dropped to his knees.

Mikey put his hands on his shoulders. “Raph? What’s wrong? Is it the voices again?”

But his head was silent, save for a ringing in his ears. He stared at the elevator blankly. It opened again and they weren’t there anymore.

He wasn’t sure how long he was staring, he knew Donnie and Leo had wandered up holding all of their stuff, and it took the three of them to lift him off the ground.

“What happened, Raph?” Leo asked gently as they walked his body towards the elevator.

He just stared inside. He hoped to god they’d just reappear and let him ask the burning question on his mind.

He couldn’t say this out loud until he knew.

The elevator door closed and it was just him and his brothers again.

‘You’re right.’

He whipped his head around to look, but realized the voice was Slash again.

“W-what do you mean I’m right?!”

His brothers looked at him funny but he paid them no mind.

‘You know who they are. And you’re right. Big Mama told me the first time you let me out, she wasn’t gonna crush the eggs. She said we’d never see them again. She lied.’

“B-but that makes no sense Slash! Th-they’re too old! I-it’s been a week!”

‘I don’t know. But you know that’s who they are.’

Raph slammed his head against the wall and shook it hard.

“N-no!”

Leo grabbed his shoulder and looked him in the eye. “Raph. Talk to me. What happened?”

Raph looked around the elevator in a panic. Mikey and Donnie looked scared of him, scared of what was happening.

“I-I… not here… I-in the room..”

He didn’t want anyone's secret eyes on him right now. He couldn’t trust Big Mama. Leo was right. Why had they bothered to talk to her at all today? They were better off on their own!

The door opened on their floor and they quickly rushed back inside their freshly cleaned room. Raph checked every room, every cranny. The windows were closed and no one was hiding in the corners.

After his panicked rushing he sat on the freshly cleaned sofa and tried to calm his breathing.

His brothers all stood in front of him in the conversation pit. None of them wanted him out of sight.

“Raph.” Leo said sternly. He looked up and saw them all staring at him with worried eyes.

He looked between them. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “It won’t make sense. But nothing here does. There’s.. magic and portals and dimensional travel…”

“At this point no theory is too out there.” Donnie said.

He opened his eyes and looked at them all seriously.

“They’re our kids.”

[robintherobiner]

Thoughts, explanations, and all that shit i had while writing my latest oneshot

Stand up comedians do NOT make good kidnappers - Robin_The_Robiner - Batman - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

SO first up the name. Where did it come from? God knows. I started this fic like ages ago, wrote Steph's first section, and then promptly forgot about it for three months only to come back and scribble the rest out. I dont remember how i came up with the name, but i still think its hilarious so,,

Who is Cassowary? This universes Robin, duh! Since Damian was the first, i thought he'd go for a more intimidating bird. These birds have really sharp claws, and leave wounds similar to those of a blade. Huh. Who do we know who is really good with a sword? Exactly 😎

Writing Steph was hard because I don't know her very well, so I may have projected onto her a little bit (hence the excessive death jokes 😅). I hope it came across that Steph is a detective, like Bruce, but that she's doesn't lazer-focus on that stuff like him. Thats why she focuses on describing Junior at first, not the room she's in or the fact she's chained up. She knows these things, but she only brings them up when relevant. What good is wallowing over being chained up when you could be making fun of your kidnapper, huh?

I'm a bit worried that i didn't make it obvious enough that there is time between Steph's and Bruce's sections. Thats why when we finish Steph's third bit, she's shitting on Junior for dressing like the Joker, but then in the final bit, she's aware that it's Tim. The parts aren't happening at the same time, or right after the other. I hope that was obvious, but im not sure.

BRUCE'S BIT!!! I saw a post once saying that Bruce separates his personas very hard, and i really liked that. When he's talking about Batman, it's only referred to as Batman. When he's having more emotional thoughts, it's Bruce. And, of course, when he's dealing with Crystal (who i don't know very well so probably wasn't well written MY BAD YALL), he's Brucie. The guilt is in all of them, though. Fun stuff!

A big part of Stephanie and Bruce's relationship in canon is, from what i can tell, tense because of the way he treated her when he first met her. BUT in this fic, it's a bit lessened because Steph chalks his shittyness to the fact that he recently lost a son. Also, i think in canon a big part of why Bruce refused to get close to Steph was because of how she reminded him of Jason, which obviously isn't a problem in this universe. Bruce and Steph are still tense, but this time she has the eldest kid on her side pretty easily, cuz Damian feels guilt over Tim LOL

The death!! It's not overly explained, but I do have Tim's death all planned out and shit. It's a mix of the Joker Junior scene from Batman Beyond : Return of The Joker, and then also a little bit of canon. Instead of Bruce being out of Gotham, like in the film, it's that they have an argument. Similar to Jason and Garzonas situation, in how Bruce is angry at the thought of his partner killing, but more so using the Boomerang arc from canon (Tim wanting to kill his Dad's murderer)

Junior's mental state is wild. I'm not writing him with any particular mental illness, mostly because I'm not at all knowledgeable enough to portray something correctly. Instead I'm basing him off of Joker Junior's intro scene, and also me during some of my darkest moments! It's not Pit Rage (i don't lie how much the fandom pushes that onto Jason, similar to the Tim-Doesn't-Sleep idea in which it wasn't canon but then it got popular and was made so, i think) and instead just a extremely traumatised 17 year old!

The teaparty scene was put in there because I wanted Tim to have a hobby that he could share with his mom (because god knows everyone hates Janet because they mess up her character and only look at fanon) and that also can be used to show his mental state. Hence, collecting figurines, and playing with them! Yippee! Thanks to my pal Leo over on discord for suggesting this hobby!! (it was originally stuffed animals but I thought Batburger toys would work better)

Damian and Duke both were the first kids, instead of Dick and Barbara. Instead of Batgirl, we have Batkid, and then instead of Oracle, we have Signal. Damian is Shrike, because that is the most common hero name I see for him and I couldn't think of another. I may go back and change it to Nightwing, because I like the meaning of the name, but it would come from Superboy (Jon) instead of Superman in this universe, so maybe it comes later on? Not sure. need to think on that!!

Drake Manor was, in canon, only bought after Jack woke up from the coma. But, i decided to take the fandom route in which the Drakes always lived there, simply because timeline wise it works better for me. Also in canon, Jack doesn't need the wheelchair by the end, but for my fic, he's not out of the coma long enough for that. I also added a fun basement which defo doesn't exist in canon, so just turn a blind eye to that!

If you saw the original post, you'd know that Bruce was supposed to find Steph through a series of taunting clues. I changed my mind though, because I'm not good at clues, mysteries, or cases. So, a gift with the address is sort of dissapointing, but who cares?

Steph's feelings about Tim are sort of iffy. A really popular headcanon is that Jason was Tim's robin, and thats not true. I'm pretty sure Tim just,, didn't care about Jason? Idk exactly how he felt, but whatever. Steph doesn't hate Tim, in this fic, she just sort of hates how he was as Cassowary. Bruce is full of guilt and won't say a bad word about him, but has plenty of criticism for Steph, which leads to a sort of resentment. He was Cassowary though, so there is also some adoration in her heart. Basically, she switches how she feels about him depending on the situation.

Jack and Robin. In this universe, Jack doesn't know Tim is a superhero. Tim does still take a break, but it's to spend time with his dad after he awakens, not because he's threatened. Dana also (unfortunately) isn't around in this fic, so Jack has more time to spend with Tim. It's sort of a win-lose situation though. More time with Tim so they get closer, but without Dana to calm him, Jack's little bouts of fury are stronger (remember how he fucking ripped out a TV??) so their relationship is more strained, which is why Tim does go back to being Cassowary, just for a bit, before his dad dies.

Hints are sprinkled in Steph's bits that tell on Tim's identity. Not many, because I'm really bad at hints and subtlety, but there are a few. Mentions of shock burns (the electrocution duh), Zesti instead of tea (which is Tim's canon favourite drink, not coffee!!), and his wish that Steph stops being a hero.

Tims motivations are a reverse of Jasons canon ones. Jason forgives Bruce for not saving him, but is mad he wasn't avenged. Tim forgives Bruce for not avenging him, but is mad he wasn't saved. Aint that fun? Thats why instead of beating her up, Tim kidnaps Steph for three days to resemble the three weeks he was held captive before he died. Yippee, allegories! (i think that word isn't right, but i can't think of the right one??!! english is HARD)

WOW i had a lot of thoughts and explanations and shit for that oneshot, huh? 🤭

[bonescribes]

muse dynamic wishlist .

for you to pop into my dms and be like "bones we should do this with [YOUR MUSE HERE]!!!"

chilchuck: - parent + child. let chil parent your muse

fai: - mentor + mentee. honestly i'd love to explore post-canon fai a bit more... fai as a healed man mentoring your muse...in life? in magic? all of the above? - sunshine + grumpy. please please PLEASE throw your grumpies at fai, he will annoy the hell out of them with his childish whimsy

falin: - sunshine + grumpy. different from the fai kind in that falin is so gentle and patient, she's very much ideal for muses who need a little bit (or a lot) of that sort of personality to open up. - gal pals. /srs i want falin to have a bestie. just soft friendship where they can open up to each other and have fun and. yeah :) - gal pals. /j i love shipping falin

fleki: - sun + moon. fleki is a creature of pure chaos and a calming presence beside her is always appreciated. - emotionally mature + the exact opposite. on that note, fleki is incredibly emotionally immature. pairing her up with someone who is entirely the opposite could lead to some interesting development for her. or a horrible time for the other muse. or both! - two freaks of nature. yall wanna do elf drugs?

ukitake: - mentor + mentee. grandpa/dad figure. let him parent you and teach you the ways of the world and how to fight and philosophy and - sun + star. ukitake is a gentle sort of bright -- an excited, sunny muse to bounce off his positive energy is 10/10, even if he can't always match that energy. - this guy needs an enemy. preferably one he can shmooze onto the good side after a fair amount of spicy conflict, but a tragic ending is always fun too. :3

kurama: - vicious demon + the human he's terribly fond of. basically any kurama relationship, really, but im a big fan of him getting to protect his favorite creatures in increasingly horrifying ways. (i swear kurama isnt evil and i dont write him that way. i swear) - vicious demon + the equally vicious indivudal he cant stand. being the way he is, kurama doesnt have a whole lot of enemies, much less ones that can actually stand up to him. we should change this.

light: - two traumatized weirdos healing together. lets go on a healing journey...together. and probably fuck it up a lot and often. - (puts your muse in the nonary games) (puts your muse in the nonary games) (p - sender + receiver. what if ur muse suddenly had a lowkey psychic mindlink with light. what if - rivals. light is a vain motherfucker. i have no concepts for this, but him having a rival is so funny to me. he is never not the smartest guy in the room he would lose his mind

simon: - toxic yaoi. pha.ntomq.uill is a favorite ship of mine, i will not be accepting questions at this time - sunshine + grumpy. simon is the grumpy. - prisoners. just imagine it. your muse is in jail, my muse is in jail....the possibilities are endless. - enemies. less in a literal sense (unless...?) and more in a "two haters who should not be allowed in the same room" kind of sense. - childhood friends. a banger trope made even more banger by simon's transformation from Polite Little Guy to Pretends To Be A Villain Mastermind And Hasnt Slept In 7 Years. - found family. just...all of it. let simon be your big brother. come be simon's dad. whatever. i fuck with this so heavy

[maukiki1-but-cringefail]

i swear to fucking god im not a hater but if i see another fucking badly-made thumbnail boring neurotypical straight guy with lame monotone voice talking over buncha mfb clips video of the worst metal fight beyblade takes ive ever seen with the unfunniest jokes im gonna rearrange the DNA sequence of the closest person to me to that of a Doto greenamyeri nudibranch because i swear to god just shut the fuck up.

how the fuck do you meatheads base how much you like a character over powerscaling and win ratio. would you prefer a wild bear over your own mother because the bear is stronger than her? thats how you fuckin sound like. i gotta rant this shit out because i had enough if i hear another fucking "ryūga da goat🥶🐐" "beyblade really is that serious🤣" "This show is so acoustic😵" "did you know that moses split the sea with a be-" WE FUCKING KNOW THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS AT THIS POINT. ALSO IF YOU DEADASS USE AUTISM AS AN INSULT LET ALONE USE THE WORD ACOUSTIC OR ARTISTIC FOR IT STAY 7 KILOMETERS AWAY FROM ME AND ALSO DONT WATCH METAL FIGHT BEYBLADE EVERYONE IS GAY AND AUTISTIC YOU KNOW WHY⁉️ which cishet neurotypical out there makin spinning tops fight with neon green or blue whateverthefuck hair half the cast looks like they been hiding in closet before their debut episode.

PRIME example of these bad takes is , because of powerscaling again the hate on masamune ? i thought people hated him because they thought he was annoying (like how i did when i first watched it when i was little) (FOUR YRS OLD) and like id get that as in he talks alot or whatever but people hate him because. fucking. "he has a low win ratio and claims to be the number one blader" BITCH THATS A 15 YR OLD. or like around that age somewhere you get the point. so what if the taco doritos colour palette guy a little confident in himself bitch you hate fun you hate sillyness. people also use him as like a tool to praise kenta? constantly i see takes like "kenta is like masamune if masamune didnt suck" or something as in they both try to rise to the top and get stronger but one of them doesnt talk shit like did you know you can praise a character without putting down the other one motherfucker. another one is "masamune isnt a legendary blader because he talks shit but cant actually back it up" Hey my brother in Allah lets play a little game. which one of the fucking legendary bladers talks big about himself. you have ten seconds. 10...9...8....KING. KING IS RIGHT THERE .

also saw someone say damian shouldve been a legendary blader⁉️⁉️mf that boy was on rearrangement stereoids the effects of that wouldve already worn off by the time of metal fury how does that even WORKK😭😭 he was probably off with 3 big fucking pet dogs to eat custard pudding or sumn idk .Ryūga dickriding has been a thing for for ever but right now for some reason people decided they didnt talk about that guy enough. theres so many videos on him guys there are other characters to talk about i can write a three billion word essay on damian but i dont think i can say anything about ryūga that hasnt been said at this point. also the people who claim hes alive BECAUSE hes alive in the manga is crazy like yall cant see those as two different universes? im not saying wether if i think hes alive or not this isnt about that dont miss the point. i wanted to make text posts about mfb for forever but i was embarrased for god knows why so i just posted my mfb fanart on my main but i cant take it anymore (eatina burger with no honey mustard) must speak this time im afraid

also sorry if this is hard to read im not good at ending sentences where i should punctuation jumpscare. powerscaling mfs will hear u say u like a character like for example tsubasa or sumn and immediately bring up ryūga like shut the fuck up this shit happened on twitter i dont even use twitter i opened the app for 000.1 seconds. you just jelaous ryūga will never serve like did mf also im not a ryūga hater anyways i reached the character limit fuck

[kennysboxergf]

Attractiveness scale

Im trying to sleep at the moment but the sleep just ain’t coming ya know so im gonna post this and dip but I wanted to rate the Beta Squad members and a few of the guests by attractiveness for fun 🤷‍♀️

this is personal so like not who’s conventionally attractive but who is to me 🤭

the ten ppl I will be ranking are Sharky, Kenny, Chunkz, AJ, Niko (obvs) and then Darkest, Filly, Gib, HP and Johnny Carey cus i cant remember no one else

also no one talk about the spelling mistakes in this it’s late and i dont wanna spell check rn

Coming in on Number Ten its

10 - Harry Pinero

his hairlines reached the base of his skull at this point and he’s just never really been my fav guest so he gets last place unfortunately 😕😕 i think this is only bcus he violates my faves and I stand up against bullying thank you very much

9 - Yung Filly

ok yall gonna get mad at me for this one but he’s very bf material i cant lie just not very attractive for me? There’s some vids and photos where he’s like FINNEEE but then most of the time he’s mad funny and cute just not that attractive ya know and he looks like he’s 4’3”, like I KNOW he’s taller but he dresses and the way he moves idk he moves short af

8 - AnesonGib

ok so I had him 6th originally but I acc looked at pics of him and changed my mind, I have not seen a single Gib vid like from his own channel, ive seen gib in the Mafia vid, some old Chunkz vids and ive seen his fights but he’s so FINE and underrated as fuck like?? Appreciate this man?? And he seems mad kind. I <3 Gib. I do not know anything about him tho but I recently saw a vid of Chunkz from like 6 years ago with him in it and Young gib? Mad fine but also he looks almost child entertainer ish so do with that what you will

7 - Chunkz

aight ya ok, my BAD, im SORRY but like he’s just not it for me, he’s leng i wont lie but like he’s so authoritative and i cant with that ya know? Like I need a chill man for me im somehow worried this man gonna slap my neck if I talk back and im not tryna get treated like toddler im tryna be your girl? calm ur ass down and we talk

6 - AJ

ok SO I know, I know, im going to get absolutely dragged and maybe even jumped for how low this is but like once again he’s very aggressive and sh and I cnat deal with that, he MAD fine tho he’s so Hahrhdhhfbdnsk but like I rate the others better he is taller then me tho so he can have that

5 - Johnny Carey

YALL SLEEP ON THIS MAN, YALL ARE SNORING AND DROLLING AND EVERYHTING CUS THIS MAN IS SO FINE like I cnat deal with him he’s so fine to me? Like yeah he looks a little wonky and asymmetrical but like? Have you seen the wya he looks at people? Omgmgmmgmg

4 - Kenny

considerably low considering my username but ive developed as a person dont judge me but he mad mad good looking, when he boxes?? 10/10 in a track suit?? 10/10 this entire man is one big SMASH like ❤️

3 - Niko

this man is so cute but also hot its weird to believe he exists like?? I want to climb him like a tree, nuff said and maybe he IS a little lanky but he’s MY sorta lanky (ive always been this way, the nickname for my crush in middle school was lanky tree like taht legit what he called him and looking back he WAS lanky af)

2 - Sharky

Sharky, Sharky, Sharky where do I even start? I think the Sharky girlies on here have said enough for me, he’s hot, he’s cute, he’s nice, he’s funny what more do you even want? And he dresses so NICE and his smile is so SWEET and he’s CARING like omg I might fall in luv and his Hands. Thats it. Look at his hands my Lordy lord.

1 - Darkest Man

my bae, my love, I will defend his bald head for life, Aaliyah has SPOILED me by mentioning how fine he was cus now i cant Stop watching every video ever with him in it, ive watched FootAsylum, his own channel, Chunkz Channel, Sharky’s Channel, even JD sports just to watch him on my screen like he’s so funny I’m cracking up every other second and he looks good doing it too and the faces he makes and HIS HANDS omg dont even get me started heiwkwkskfb I cnat even he’s my no. 1 🫶🫶

Done

ok so taht was my list and now im gonna nominate my mutuals to do this too, you can go for the same guests or choose your own its entirely up to you but I wann see some more opinions so please do it 🫶🫶

Taglist- @b4tasquad @allygatcr @shuuuuush @vctrvn-ls

Sadly that is all my moots, I thought I had more but thats it I guess, I hope yall can find time to do this otherwise its fine 😭🫶

[slamdunkhcs]

Hello!!! Just wanted to say I love all your posts and dissections on the characters, I'm getting a lottt of sd brain rot and hopefully I can start writing for it soon!! Thank you for keeping the Fandom alive <3

ps. Top 3 characters?

Thank you so much, it makes me really happy hearing this. I haven’t been very active for a while but i will try responding to more requests. I’m not good at ranking characters but i will list out some of my favorites and why i like them

my favorite slam dunk characters

ayako

Okay I haven’t made many posts with her included (which im gonna do 😂) but I LOVE Ayako

She’s very beautiful and i think in a way that’s unconventional compared to many mangas. Curly haired female characters are really uncommon in manga, so seeing a girl like ayako was really surprising. I think her features overall make her look really realistic. Like she looks morrocan or dominican, and the fact that she’s portrayed to be canonically beautiful makes it so that her features are portrayed in a positive light

Also she’s literally the backbone of the team? Part of why Miyagi stayed for hs basketball was because she encouraged the team so well. She’s been there since before the team was good, like how akagi and kogure were. And throughout the series, she gave the boys ALOT of support. Like girl was literally the one who taught Sakuragi the basics??

sawakita

If you don’t alr know, I love this boy sm. Like that’s my man right there

Sawakita is also very different from other sports manga rivals. I mean he gets made fun of by his own team, mf cries SM. He has fangirls and I think he treats them well (shown by how he wore a t shirt one of them gifted).

He’s not a bad person either, he even helped Rukawa up when he fell down. He was very encouraging towards his teammates too when he was benched. DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS PARENTS?? He’s so respectful to them, boy was out there thanking them for everything when he was drunk on a plane. Plus from his backstory, i think it shows he really loves his dad. Some yall mfs could never LMAOOO

I think his dynamic with Rukawa and Sakuragi too. He was funny asl with Sakuragi. And I like that Sawakita was part of what pushed Rukawa to improving as a player (as well as Sendoh). ALL THAT AND HES GOOD LOOKING???

kiyota

He grew on me BIG time

Mf is funny asl?? Like his interactions with Sakuragi, especially when they went on that trip together?? I just know that mf is the class clown. I feel like he’s hella popular too because of how goofy he is

I feel like he’d treat a girl mad good too. Like he would be the type to make his gf’s sides hurt from laughing LMAO. And i think hed be really sweet and talk about his girl to everybody and get her gifts. He’d love me lets be fr

I like that he’s chaotic too. LIKE he gives me black airforce menace energy

sendoh

This boy is so cute and sweet i just know it

I like that he was a chill rival too. Like he was just so down to earth, he wasn’t an asshole to NOBODY (except maybe the fish). He aint insulted nobody, not rukawa, not sakuragi. He just minded his business and played basketball

His appearance had a big glow up through the series too. People like rukawa were always drawn as good looking ecen in the beginning but sendoh was drawn to be ugly?? Like he did NOT look good. But towards the end of the series, dude was honestly stunning asl. Like he needs to put me on to whoever threaded his eyebrows

Honestly he seems like such a chill person to be friends with?? He seems so open minded, i fr cant see him as the type to judge anybody or treat anybody badly. I think at his school everyone likes him for how down to earth he is (and his looks LOLLL)

Also, I really like Miyagi, Minami, Mitsui, Maki, Fukuda, Rukawa, and Haruko too, I’m not sure ill do a pt 2 tho

[vide0n4sty]

i just read the whole issues with forcemasc scenes and while im agreeing with it, i wanna add my points into it: the scene is heavily white and eurocentric standards focused. like its always about "cutting your hair", not knowing in some cultures, like native american, its a masculine standards to keep a man's hair long. the whole ideas of masculinity has to be rough and shit. you have to have a beard, you have to have fat on, you have to wear this and that. and i remember there were some posts making fun of transmascs wanna be a "twink". like yes i know the existence of conventional beauty standards are harmful, but as long as it made said people happy about their choice and they don't force it into other people, what's the odd? plus this lowkey implying the idea of "you will regret when transition" radfems saying even and it made me cringe. and what about transmasc already had that type of body i thought yall agree on not bodyshame anyone?

do i like forcemasc and the idea of it? yes! but do i like how the community practicing it? i dont. tbh, the only forcemasc post i ever liked is like, something about letting your hair grow and you can wear a dress, you would still be a man

btw you are the only one i trust writing this kink lol no other people could do this justice

i appreciate that a lot, and yeah, i think there are definitely criticisms to be made about how forcemasc positions itself as like. the clean kink as opposed to forcefem, and yet falls back on eurocentric/white centric ideals of masculinity in service of its goal of gender affirmation as opposed to titillation. like if you're going to go into 'shave your head, be a bear' etc., commit to the bit, ya know?

i read this very good essay/post about why forcemasc is largely an obsolete fetish which references "disidentification" (codified by a queer person of colour) as a driving force behind forcefem;

forcefem kind of WORKS because it's a survival tactic, which the original text also connects to being a queer person of colour, taking these absurdly misogynistic and shameful fantasies where Woman is abject, the Othered object of desire (as women so often are in a patriarchal society), and reinterpreting into sexual gratification, gender affirmation, comfort, security, freedom

forcemasc doesn't scratch that same itch because Man (and wanting to be a man) simply is not abject in a patriarchal society, Man is not Othered, Man is not shameful.

and i think the forcemasc boys kind of KNOW THAT, so they have to push it further and lean into. like. eurocentric ideals of masculinity for their lame tboy poetry, as opposed to having a fetish about injecting T and getting a big cock and ooooo you wanna jerk off five times a day, you dumb gross boy, which i think is a little more generic but also a lot more overtly sexual too lmao

IDK!!! FORCEMASC IS A SEX THING. LET'S KEEP IT THAT WAY, LOVES AND LAUGHS XOXO

[sugar-omi]

Hiiii! We're moots but I'm shy lol

I just wanted to tell you that I've been following you for nearly a year now and your writing has improved SO MUCH. It was always good, you definitely have a talent! But you're building the skill too and it's so fun to watch. I always get so excited when I see you've posted a little story and I hope you post so many more :)

Thank you for your service to this fandom, you are irreplaceable to us <3

OMG HIII <3 don't be shy, i promise i don't bite lol so feel free to msg me anytime <33

but thank you so muchhh, you made me so happy i could CRY. you're so sweet. and i so agree with you omg, it had been years since i wrote for fun and even though i wrote many good fics for my creative writing class, i could see such a big difference in my writing when i first started this blog but i knew i just had to keep writing n i'd get to where i wanted to be.

so seeing people like or reblog my older work is kinda embarrassing because i know it's not as good as what i write now, and i always go "oh god. please dont let that be the FIRST thing you read from me" or "omg may i interest you in this less cringy work" LMAO, but im happy you all enjoy it anyway 😂🫶

honestly you're making me tear up LOL i dunno about 'irreplaceable' but i'm so glad i get to write for this fandom, this is the most fun i've had in fandom like ever, n yall are so kind and very supportive.

thank you so much for reading this long, and thank you to the new people reading too. yall are too sweet. i will try to write more, so that way yall have many good, quality fics to read, and we can keep having fun together <3

[kaiserkisser]

mutuals appreciation post <333

hello, everyone. this is my end of year mutuals appreciation post to thank each and every one of you here, who has put up with me enough to be friends with me. I simply can't put it into words how much I love yall and how much im grateful to all of you for being here, but I'll still try. I wish all of you a very very happy new year ❤

@delusina kaz, thank you. thank u sm for everything. you were my first mutual and i love you sm for that. almost all the friends i have right now, they're thanks to you. i still remember sending you cat pics every week in the beginning (im sorry i forgot to continue that 😭) and you and vi are the reason ✿❀ anon exists <3 ilysmm <333

@floraldresvi VIVI. ILYSM. ik ive already sent you a new year ask but still i can never express my appreciation for you enough <3 thank you sm vi for literally always being there for me, and i hope i can return the favor whenever you need :) i lovelovelove seeing you in my notifs :)) also baivi rules <333

@chosokisser mai my bbg my love /p again, ive already mesaaged you, but still, im so glad i have you in my life. if you need absolutely anything, if you just wanna talk to smn, or anything, ill always be here. in fact, we can even commit arson together if you want :DD and remember that me and choso adore you to heaven and back <333

@haithamvoid again, thank you sm for being friends with me. <33 im literally so glad for the day i opened tumblr to find mai forcing us to socialize XD we seem to have a bunch of shared interests and i remember the times we sent each other a bunch of kaiser (and gojo??) pics ehehe (also if you play genshin then on which server-)

@damyoujackson uhm thank u sm for being my irl bestie. I mean it. honestly i dont think ive actually had a friend i clicked with as much as i did with you in a long time. ik its probably not easy putting up with someone weird like me so erm tysm.. in all seriousness im really glad we're friends <33 ( we do NOT talk abt this in school OKAY.) (<- me being awkward)

@noomon you are an absolutely amazing, warm and pleasant person to be around! (And i love your aesthetic too omg) anyways you're very caring and nice and i always perk up whenever i see you in my notifs or inbox <33

@mikacynth mikaaa its been agesss i hope you're doing alright and uni is treating you well </3 again, one of my first mutuals that i interacted with bc you were a 'mutual in law' of mine hehe :) you're also an awesome and fun person to be around, so remember that me and kaeya love u <333

@yinyinggie yingg! You're such a big blog, so thank you sm for interacting with me! you're totally wonderful, and im so glad i got to participate in the ebg hosted by you hehe that was SO much fun <333(and it hurt my heart too but nvm-) anyways ilysmm <33

@alexisomnias aaah alexisss we dont interact much these days but still, i love you so so much, you are someone i always love seeing on my dash or in my notifs <3 and i adore alekav too its so cutee <333

@kitorin omg yes soutaa you're another person who shows up on my dash often and i love that you do <3 i hope you dont mind all the times ive tagged you in smth ahshshdhb i also always smile whenever i see u in my notifs so thank u smm for being moots with me <33

also to @ilyuu @m1shapanda @supernova25 @chooodles @camvrin @meidnightrain we havent interacted much this year, but ive loved seeing you guys often on my dash so i hope we interact more this next year <333 please dont mind me tagging you dhshsh

Happy New Year to all of you!!!! I hope you all have all the joys of the world and that all your wishes get fulfilled, because you guys totally deserve it 💕

I found a little something too here that i wanted to share with all of you since i thought you guys might like it <333

[astraydestiny]

Daily Writing Complete‼️

Homestly, not really. I wrote 505, IM GOING BACK TO 505, sorry, words on my main story… BUTTT i wrote a bunch of notes and stuff that has to equate to like 700 words??? But thats for my main story, I finished one of the CW!!!

That’ll be out to you guys tomorrow. Im pretty pround of it! Especially for 1.5k! But… I feel like its a bit rushed, and in some places it feels a bit exposition heavy? But i do like the emotion and symbolism in the story. It turnes out pretty good I think! I cant wait for you guys to see this because then you guys can actually get a grip for how I write and stuff, and not judge my writing off these stupid blurbs and stuff! Yk, if you guys like the one tomorrow, I’ll give yall a Thousand Fireflies to eat up too! Just- dont copy it alright? Its not free-use work!!! In fact- i should probably put that in my bio and stuff. But anyways… IM PROUD OF MYSELF! I feel like I was blocked on my main story, because I had a fun time writing this side project! I just that goes to show how important it is to take breaks from main projects in favor for smaller ones, just so you dont burn yourself out by accident! Because burning yourself out is… NOT GOOD! Not good to sya the least… but yah. I feel like i got multiple questions wrong on my science quiz today and istgoodness… IT WAS EZ I SWEAR TO GOODNESS. I just tripped up during it… Also guys I realized that I should really start yapping more irl because… Im look at these posts and thinking- wow. This person must have no friends if they have THIS many thoughts and no one to tell them to. AND THEN I REALIZE IM TALKING ABT MYSELF. Like sometimes I either dont speak because i dont want to interrupt someone- but the times I do speak… PEOPLE INTERRUPT ME! AND THE TIMES WHEN I FEEL LIKE I CAN ACTUALLY SPEAK- I INTERRUPT SOMEONE ELSE! Of course this doesnt happen that often, to be honest Im too busy wriitng during my lunch break to talk, but you know. PRIORITIES!!!

I LOVE PINTEREST SO MUCH. GOING CRAZY WITH IDIA SHROUD IN THE BACKGROUND 😍😍😍 i love idia sheoud i relate to him sm (not really) tbh I feel like i relate to him- but at the same time I dont??? Bec he gets prideful and arrogant sometimes and I dont get like that (HEH NOT TO FLEX OR ANYTHING 😼😼🤗🤗)

I feel like if I related to anyone, it would probably be leona. Not because hes like super fit or anything- LIKE IM THE FURTHEST AWAY FROM HIM PERSONALITY. Its just that like, him being the second and stuff, doomed to never be the first, the best, really resonates with me. Especially since Im surrounded by people who self-proclaim themselves as ‘first places’ everyday, kinda gets on my nerves… WRITING IDEA!!!!

Like im not saying having a big ego is wrong, nor am I saying that those peoples achievements are bad BECAUSE they are so amazing. i think they should be proud of that, and they dont owe humility to anyone because they worked hard for it, (AHEM AHEM VIL SCHOENHEIT MY KING). But its when they see people that are trying to reach for those ambitions and they flaunt how they could do better. THATS when I start doubting their ability. Because you could be the best in the world, but if your too busy running your mouth about how your the best, you’ll be left in the dust- and youll find that all those people who were under you before… Appeared triumphant.

IDK DAILY WORDS OF WISDOM ADDED HERE TOO. Vil Schoenheit my KINGGGGG I LOVE HIM SO MUCH I WANT TO BE LIKE HIM. When i become rlly good at writing, I want to be able to act like him!! Because he is confident in himself, doesnt owe humility to anyone (but of course still expresses it from time to time), and is respectful about it (we dont talk about book 5). I love Vil Schoenheit, such a misunderstoid character fr. OH YEAH

If your not a twisted wonderland fan, these are the characters I mentioned in this post!!!

^ Idia Shroud in the middle, next to his lil’ bro Ortho Shroud!!

^ Vil Shoenheit in the middle, to the right is Rook Hunt, and to his left is Epel Felmier (the short one!)

^ Leona Kingscholar!!

ALRIGHT GUYS!!! Now, I have math hw. SO I NEEDA BOUNCE! SEE YOU ALL TOMORROW AND STUFF!!!

Daily music rec is Sponsored by this guy !!!@unmotivatedartistry PRETTY GOOD SONG!!!

Here are some snacks for the road: 🍔🍔🌭🌯🥙🥪🥪🍕🌯🥗🥙🍔🥪🌯 (taco bell burritos proceed with caution)

BYEEEEEEEEE

-Kani

[skips-is-asleep]

What Your Favorite Sollux Ship Says About You

I swear ive been working so hard on Space Solkat, but ive had this idea in my head for well over a year and just decided i might as well make a post about it

This is all in good fun and jokes, but if you dont want your fav ship being critisized pls dont read this, just click off lmao

AraSol: You’ve been in the fandom for a very long time and/or you love relationships that just seamlessly work together, ships that Make Sense and are right there with no subtext and you love both of these characters and want them to be happy. This is a very classic ship and they are literally perfect for each other whether you read it pale or flushed

SolTav: You love nerdy boys, you love ships with characters that have similar interests but near opposite personalities, and you also love crack shipping

Solkat: This is no hate to arasol truthers, but if you prefer mlm ships, this is the sollux ship that makes the most sense/is the best. it has the most feel good potential. You understand/love both the characters very well, but you also love the spice that their dynamic brings

SolNep: You like opposites attract and you also like ships that have a gimmick. She lays on his keyboard and chews his wires, and also brightens his day and cracks at his grumpy boy exterior. Maybe you like Nepkat but don’t like the canon baggage where he’s mean to her

SolKan: There’s a very high likelihood that you ship them pale (correct) and like ships that have really good banter potential. You also want Sollux to dress up fancy but need an logical excuse for it. If you don’t ship them pale, youre a lesbophobe

SolRezi: Very similar to solkan, you likely ship them pale and you likely love their chemistry with each other, the wit they both have bounces off each other seamlessly and they are excellent at creating bits with each other that go too far. The big difference here is that you like when shit goes CRAZY

SolVris: You’re either a contrarian/crack shipper just for the sake of, you like fixer-upper relationships with angst, or youre a lesbophobe

Solquius: You’ve been in this fandom for a long time, you really really like pitch ships. or youre an equius apologist, or all three. Either way, you love looking into things that are supposed to not be taken seriously and reading too deeply

SolGam: You like opposites attract, and you prefer mlm ships, you could not get more opposite than with this two, and you think it would be really funny if they loved each other actually

Erisol: You’re a veteran homestuck, you used to/still like yaoi or youre an eridan apologist (I say this as all three)

SolFef: You love the ships that the canon gives you, you love sunshine girl and grumpy boy pairings, and im willing to bet that either youre straight, or you think one of them is straight (wrong)

JuneSol: You love crack shipping, but also you love over-analzying canon text

DaveSol: You really really like dave and want him to date a version of himself from the mirror dimension, and im also willing to bet that you only really ship this to make an OT3 with karkat work

RoseSol: I’m willing to bet this is pale again, and im gonna be real, this is davesol but better, yall are sleeping on this ship

JadeSol: You love ships with potential, and also really really want the hc that Sollux likes girls with long hair to be true/believe wholeheartedly that it is true

SolRox: You love ships with gimmicks, they are tech buddies! (I do not know the first thing about roxy ill be honest)

DIrkSol: You like dirk, and don’t really like the other ships he’s in, Sollux skates by because, of the people to ship dirk with, Sollux is probably the meanest and wittiest in that roster. No one would fight with Dirk the way Sollux would, wake up

If you ship JaneSol or JakeSol, you like crackshipping, or you read really really deep into the dialogue jake has with erisolsprite