I’m liking Guarded overall so far, but I have mixed feelings about the writing for Ash. On one hand, I actually like how stoic and serious about his job he is. He’s basically everything they tried to make Agent Gray from TPA out to be, but (unintentionally) funnier and sexier. Like I didn’t even need a chapter from his POV to know that he’s lowkey into MC.
On the other hand though, they’re pushing the “I need to protect MC at all costs” thing way too hard. He’s not even her personal bodyguard yet, so some of the things he was saying/doing/thinking just ended up making him almost sound like the stalker to me. And then him constantly thinking about how he can’t pursue her was just annoying. Like we get it, it would be unprofessional and you have some mysterious bad experience from the past. Let’s move on 🙄
I feel like the dual perspectives thing could be really good in this book, but PB has got to learn how to write internal conflict and show instead of tell. They also need to give these characters things to focus on outside of each other
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I'm never gonna recover from mr d going 'yeah but i COULD be peter johnson's dad' and chiron going 'yes, but are you?'
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I’m rereading Po3 and despite its flaws I really enjoyed the introduction to the three. Jaykit isn’t mentioned to be blind in the first few chapters and instead they chose to show how much MORE capable he is compared to his littermates; until at the end of chapter 3, he brings up his blindness on his own. It makes forcing him to be a medicine cat SO much more frustrating because it really feels like they’re setting him up to be a warrior and choose his own fate (note i haven’t finished the reread this is just my first impression)
I like how you seem to take that path in BB regardless! It makes his arc so much more enjoyable
His arc in canon is super frustrating because he's such an independent character who clearly wants to make his own decisions in life, but then he just gets shoved into the medcat den. I LIKE that he ultimately goes there and that he enjoys it; but it was still really fucked up that they stripped away his autonomy in the process.
Re: they are not real, they are writing choices. Taking away the choices a disabled character can make over their own life, forcing them into a celibate nun role, and then going "awwwww dont worry see? he likes it! This was the best thing for him :)" was fucked up.
And imo it didn't have to be that way! You wouldn't have to go the FULL route I did with big changes, he could just be more involved in the descision to stop being a warrior apprentice and it would be fine. Minor change that would make a world of difference.
I do also have to interject to say though... blindness should really not be an extremely severe impairment for a ThunderClan cat.
I'm dead serious.
Whiskers are built-in sensors that tell you the exact position of everything within several inches of your head, ears swerve to pick up sound, and the jacobson's organ provides a sense of smell so keen that I have an entire Clanmew expansion draft because I needed to make WORDS describing the power of this sense that humans do not have. I cannot stress enough how delicate their other senses are, felines do not rely on their sight like primates do
ThunderClan lives in a mixed-oak woodland, where sight is already often obscured by foliage, objects are close together (for whiskers to feel), and nearly every movement makes noise against the leaf litter. RiverClan and (moor-running) WindClan cats would have a harder time with this disability than Thunder or Shadow.
Cat sight SUCKS to begin with. It sucks BADDD. They don't have color vision, they're significantly nearsighted, and they can't track up-and-down movements well. WC doesn't write realistic cats (more like small fuzzy people really) and I also work with more humanesque eyesight, but the only thing Jay should really lose is an ability to rapidly track a small animal swerving fast. Blind cats are often still excellent hunters in spite of that!
So it's an extra big waste that they railroaded him into a position he didn't choose, saying he couldn't be a warrior. This is the perfect disability to write, if you want to explore how ableism can impact the characters in this society who ARE legitimately still capable of nearly full independence, but still need to find accommodations for what they can't do.
In the same arc they're doing the dumb Cinder Reincarnation Plotline, no less!! Where SHE is also feeling like she has no choice over her "destiny," and gets a conflict over a potentially disabling injury
"Oh nooo if cinderpaw breaks her leg she wont be a warrior!"
"What the f-- Im Jaypaw and im reporting live from the scene where a Category 1 Idiot Moment is taking place. Woman breaks leg, suddenly everyone believes she is a horse, more at 11."
One of these days I should really make "herb guides" just covering how various sensory disabilities impact the lives of Clan cats and some tips for writing them as warriors, especially between Clans. Stuff you wouldn't usually consider, like how much noise deaf cats tend to make, how RiverClan would get a ton of sinus infections and lose their sense of smell, being blind in Sky vs Thunder, etc.
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Michonne doesn’t mince words or rush moments. When she says I love you to her husband it’ll be at the exact right moment. I have a strong feeling it’ll also be said when Rick is finally out of that black uniform. So far, in every scene Richonne has had together he’s been in his CRM gear. I think removing the uniform will be symbolic of him shedding the broken soldier he’s become now and beginning to return to who he really is - not ‘Sergeant Major Grimes’ but Rick - the Rick that Michonne knows, loves, and won’t ever stop fighting for. He’s still in there and she knows it.
The search for Rick didn’t end during their first reunion in those woods, but when she finds him, really finds him, I just know we’ll hear a very beautiful I love you exchange. She’s already said it with her eyes, she’s said it with her actions, and at the right time Michonne will say I love you in words, where Rick can fully grasp that she never stopped loving him and always will. He tried to pull the ‘if you love me, you’ll go’ thing but I know Michonne is going to let Rick know there is no ‘if,’ which is why she won’t go without him. She’s madly in love with him just like he’s madly in love with her, and I love these crazy soulmates 🤍
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