#best movie series
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inbabylontheywept · 5 months ago
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i once accidentally dated someone for a few months. its very difficult to explain how this happened, but the gist is that i thought we were hanging out, and she thought we were on dates, and it was just a very painfully highschool thing.
she was a little bit confused that i hadnt tried to pull any moves, at all, even a little. like, didnt even try holding hands because, and i cannot emphasize this enough, i did not know we were dating.
so, halloween rolled around, and she thought, you know, why wait for destiny, when you can grab it? so she hit me with a clue by four.
babylon, she said. babylon. my mom's gonna be out of town on halloween, and im gonna have the house to myself, and it's going to be kind of lonely. would you like to come to my house and watch scary movies with me?
you know, kind of a netflix and chill thing. except, and i cannot emphasize this enough, i did not know we were dating. also autism. so i took it at face value and said: oh! yeah! thatd be fun! and she thought she got her point across, but she didnt and it was a mess.
skip forward to halloween: my family has a block party every year, right? and at that point i was too old to really trick or treat, but we still wore costumes for our role in the block party, which in my case, was handing out cotton candy. so i took the first shift, and my costume was this homemade abomination minion thing. i had full yellow body paint, and goggles, and a bald cap, and overalls. the kids who saw it were like, uh, hm. overly realistic minion. and adults were like, oh, some kind of hills have eyes hillbilly with jaundice. very scary.
(it was not my best costume.)
my little brother swapped me out for second shift, and i was getting ready to change out to head to her house when i was like: no, she'll get a real kick out of this. this is one of the worst things i have ever worn. so i kept it on and just brought a change of clothes thinking i could shower real quick and change at her place after she saw my nightmare getup.
so i left after that, got there, knocked on her door, and she said come on in. so i went in, and there was this very long hall with an abrupt right turn into her living room where the tv was, and i went down the hall, and i made the turn, and my field of view went from beige drywal to her, on the couch, naked. naked in the paint me like one of your french girls pose. super naked.
i panicked. this was my first time seeing a real person like, full on sex naked,which is a totally different beast from other kinds of naked. you see one kind of naked and you think yeah, im ready for all the kinds of naked, but you arent. i wasnt at least. i really wasn't.
so my brain crashed to BIOS. she also crashed to BIOS, but for different reasons. of all the ways this could have turned me, having me show up in yellow body paint and overalls was pretty pretty low down the list.
so we sat there a while, and you know, she wasn't getting any less naked, which really wasn't helping me get my brain sorted out. it really wasnt much of a surprise when she got her bearings first and started asking questions.
"babylon," she said. "babylon. what are you wearing?"
and i was like, kind of rebooted, but i was nowhere near full functionality, so symbolic language wasnt loaded in yet. i had nothing running but my trusty autism.exe, so i said
"overalls"
and she looked at me like i was the dumbest person in the entire world, and i looked at her like she was the first naked person i had seen in real life who got naked specifically for me, and my upper level cognitive process went: "listen man, we are not going to get our shit together as long as 80% of your brain power is devoted to not blinking. you gotta get out of here."
and if id communicated that, maybe things would have been less of a mess, but instead i just kind of turned around and walked back to my car. i figured i could drive a few loops around the block, get my brain in order, and figure out what the hell we were gonna do.
the only thing i had said to her since arriving was, again, overalls.
first loop around, i was like: oh god fucking damnit. oh shit. oh shit. shes gonna get like, an eating disorder from this. oh no.
second loop around i was like: oh NOOOOO oh WHAT THE FUCK oh SWEET JESUS PLEASE. i dont wanna go back man. i just wanna bury this and forget about it. please. please. let this bitter cup pass from my lips.
and after my third loop, i went and i knocked on her door again.
she answered it this time, and i counted my lucky stars that she'd changed into some pajamas. she was all teary eyed which was the saddest thing ever, and we sat down in her kitchen and talked. it was pretty bad - i figured out we'd been dating, and she figured out that trying to jump from home plate to 3rd base is considered ballsy in baseball, least of all dating. no real winners there. and i can remember after all that, we sat there a bit a bit longer, just steadying ourselves, and i was like "well, im actually really glad we figured that out. guess i'll see you at school tomorow' and she said "WAIT. wait."
"lets watch shrek 2."
so we did and it was horrible. we did not look at each other. we did not say a word. we just sat in stony silence, while shrek 2 played in the background, and when it was done we shook hands. i think we might have been able to salvage that as a friendship if it hadnt been for shrek. as it was she turned white as a sheet and ran away every time she even got a glimpse of me at school, and that summer she moved to a new state to live with her dad. all her friends said she moved just so she wouldn't have to go to school with me anymore, and i dont actually think they were lying.
every time i hear relationship counselors talk about how important communication is, and i'm tempted to roll my eyes, i look back and go, alright. alright. theres probably some poor bastard, somewhere in the world, who doesnt even know that hes married.
and god help him when he figures it out.
other bad dating story here.
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verified-villain-fxcker · 3 months ago
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This might be the last time we see Tom Hardy Venom on screen so I just wanna say, from the bottom of my monster fucker heart, it has been an absolute pleasure to go through this series with you all these last 6 years.
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atomicfoxx · 5 months ago
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Your Honor I love him‼️
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httpdramas · 13 days ago
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I'm Still Here (2024)
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transmasculinizing · 3 months ago
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i am open to criticism (but u have to be nice about it)
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wwillywonka · 5 months ago
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Hell of a time to ask.
Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
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purple-iris · 4 months ago
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I'll never get over the fact that since SNW, we now know they are the two crew members of the TOS Enterprise who have known each other for the longest time-
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How did Uhura feel when her best friend died in TWOK now I wonder...
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mooxsully · 7 months ago
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"She gets hurt. She dies. She catches a fever. She's taken out by a walker. She gets hit by lightning. Anything. Anything happens to her, I'll kill you."
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Daryl Dixon, the man that you are😵‍💫🙇🏻‍♀️
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megamixsmania · 9 months ago
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The knuckles paramount show is so fun when you don't have a bitch in your ear telling you it sucks ☝🏻☝🏻
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to-all-the-boys · 6 months ago
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'to all the boys i've loved before' is absolute perfection. i can't believe i'm saying this but oh my gosh i forgot just quite how good it is. my sister just put it on and of course i insisted i rewatch it with her and wow. the colour grading, the direction, the palpable chemistry between the leads, and sweetness and innocent joy that permeates the film...oh that movie is absolutely everything to me. all time banger
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thesharktist · 7 months ago
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"Statement of Vanessa Shelly regarding the strange occurrences at Freddy Fazbear's Pizzeria. Statement taken from subject on ##########. Statement begins."
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v4lta01 · 4 months ago
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Excuse me, I just found out Loki only has one hour and seventeen minutes of screentime in the movies! It feels like he has so much more! And he got us all to fall for him he's that amazing.
(Idk how much screentime if you added in the series)
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fanofspooky · 7 months ago
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An everyday feeling…
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rinabirgul · 9 months ago
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i am not a obsessive person
sent from my iphone
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loki-0bsessed · 1 month ago
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His smile
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connabeth · 1 year ago
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friendly but stern reminder for those of you excited to watch the premiere of the pjo tv show:
DO NOT stream it on disney+ if you have a subscription (& cancel that subscription while you’re at it).
disney has notoriously funded isnotreal’s war crimes and gen*cide in palestine with millions in donations. riordan took a “neutral” stance on the genocide, pledging support for both isnotreal and palestine, which is nonsensical at its core and completely avoids the history and gravity of the issue at hand.
DO NOT give these people your money if you have even an ounce of humanity in you. there are SO many free online p*rating sites, of which i’m sure you all have your favorites—i’ll put some of mine in the tags. episodes will be uploaded onto them almost instantly in HD quality, as they are with any show released on big streaming platforms (even if there was a greater “inconvenience” that came with pirating, it shouldn’t really affect your decision to funnel less of your money to gen*cide because this show is SO trivial in comparison).
anyway, decolonize palestine 🍉
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