#being unsettling today
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
For me it's that weird sickening green like these prepared animals in jars, that water has this color and for me it's also a little bit of red that stinks like blood in different variants of rotting and a little bit of yellowish artificial light. The whole palette of blue-gray shades of night and day; The color of the soil, a color that follows us all the time and gets stuck somewhere in the back of our heads, but not warm, fresh, scented with hope and life but that frozen and covered with dust.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/5c4231b0bccaef3db751e0e75d5431f5/78d3e45246a15d01-93/s540x810/4fc6e9463c6d473b4801a9d53652c796e30505f3.jpg)
Here goes a little photo of mine that I wanted to squeeze here :) not really related but you can take a look?
Almost forgot, the color of the monastery walls, cold as the ones of a cave but adapted to living between them.
Okay weird question but what color is like minds to y'all??
Like for me it's black, green, blue, and a bit of yellow
I don't know how to describe it but my brain associates those colors with it so🤷
#like minds#babbling#profesional yapper#someone asked so I answear🔥#like minds aesthetic#murderous intent#color palette#being unsettling today
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
crazy seeing rightwing people calling the barbie movie anti-men considering i’m pretty sure the “i’m just ken” song did more good for men’s mental health than any number of their shitty little incel forums combined
#not su /#genuine banger telling men not to define their worth by having a gf or trying to dominate others#and they still can’t handle the movie quipping about the state of gender relations by saying kens will one day be as important in society#as women today (which is an excellent prompt for people to realize how unequal the world still is and be unsettled but people still don’t#get it) and it’s just. So revealing that you can’t handle being treated like you’re not the center of the world for 5 seconds#barbie movie#barbie#barbie 2023
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
When all of this is over, will you come to wake me up?
Do you promise?
... I'll be waiting.
closeup under cut
#Legend of Zelda#loz#legend of zelda skyward sword#loz ss#zelda#skyward sword#staring tw#my art#something something divinity watching your every move expectantly even before you're aware enough to ask why#(with a dash of unsettling connotation for fun)#struggled for like 30 billion years drawing 20% of this#and then today i just made a mad dash coloring rendering etc and finished it in one#shout out to adhd for being like that#also i changed the style of her dress collar just slightly for fun
754 notes
·
View notes
Text
The Dandy with his Hand on his chest
I wanted to do a big piece before the month ended and I had been thinking on drawing a study of "The Nobleman with his Hand on his Chest" by El Greco with Slayer for a good while, because I adore that painting and believe it fits him, since it has a mysterious yet noble aura to me. Very dandy!
I love Slayer's Rev2 Color 4, so I got really happy when it returned as Color 10 in Strive, now with a very stylish nail polish, too.
#ok I'm attempting to keep my kilometric rambles in the tags instead of the post to not scare away people so keep reading if you want#slayer#guilty gear#guilty gear strive#guilty gear fanart#art tag2b named#before this painting I wouldn't have counted the og painting as one of my favs but now I do#I remember first seeing it in an artbook as a kid in which it was described as dismal and that actually scared me lol. It impacted me a lot#for a painting.. nowadays I feel it's awesome but again I still find it to have a bit of a mysterious aura. I hope this doesn't come off as#me going “I don't get this artwork so oooh it's scary!” but me thinking it has an aura that captivates your imagination#that being said I DID want MY version to be a bit unnerving or spooky because. color 10 slayer come on! I hope it worked#tried to do proper more complex lighting this time. I learnt a lot.. I def made the face's more dramatic but couldn't get the rest to look#the same plus I kinda like the face's contrasting with the rest of the lighting. also I do enjoy the end result of the body lighting#slayer's face is so tough.. that alone took me three days#idk what was going on w the background. it's a bit similar to my hos/ab.a pic's but fair enough#one day I'll learn to make complex detailed backgrounds. not today. it kind of came out like sm64d.s character portraits which could be a#bit unsettling for young me so it just works#sorry I enjoyed drawing this a lot so I have a lot of thoughts about it. thank you if you read. hope you enjoy the drawing :)#eye contact
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8411655892c480567d0435215d3357d8/39e1596ecb9c1ca1-b2/s540x810/2344a4411fd145bda4ef9e1d8120b42973476efe.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4072389e442e7752c38b2de7c1df5a8a/39e1596ecb9c1ca1-53/s540x810/bb0dfa71ef82b683b46d62ece1c85b8923c79045.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/67babb7787b83ac234094e2320df09ed/39e1596ecb9c1ca1-65/s540x810/c932ed4c0c2c129c77723e979c66491c21bcccb9.jpg)
I have found a beautiful perfect humble rock specimen that is light yellow with a weird dark yellowy brown lining, somewhat resembling a chunk of smoked gouda cheese... effervescent
#I am still very into trash collecting at the moment and even went out and got one of those grabby sticks for cheap and a little#bucket I can carry around and put trash in. so I am going on walks in nature a bit more (not really to enjoy nature but more to play the#very fun Real Life Hidden Object Point And Click Game that is 'hunt for bottle caps and cans' .. but eh.. whatever gets me out of the#house lol).. anyway.. some nature places near water will have cool rocks#Which I know you're not supposed to take them and I MOSTLY dont.. but every once in a while it's like... when else will I ever find a#gouda rock... I have cleaned up 4 buckets of trash today.. I have helped the environment.. mayhaps.. i could take a One Single Rocke as a#treate... ANYWAY. but yeah. I don't know the names of rocks but there's a rock that's a matte muted marigold yellow sort of#color and I call them 'cheese rock'. I'm pretty sure this one is of the 'cheese rock' species but it just has weird brown coloration#like maybe it got stained or something on one side of it. Most of the other cheese rocks have no markings. though sometimes there will be a#auburn reddish sort of hue on a corner or something.. hrmm.. curious. I also got a Beginner's Hobby rock tumbler and some supplies#so I might try polishing some of the rocks from my enormous rock collection. even though they're all street rocks I picked up from sidewalk#and stuff. I saw a video where someone put random gravel and stuff in a rock tumbler and none of them were Stunning Gems or whatver#but some still turned out cool enough that I would be pleased with the result... OUgh.. I want to post more I need to like do costumes and#sculptures and stuff and be Active On Social Media and think about my Future and Career and how it always benefits artists to keep an#active social media or etc. but I just feel so tired and bad lately. I think the summer heat waves have really exhausted me. I also have#been trying to make new friends + on a weird schedule so I've been socializing and also watching media too much. I notice I always start#to feel this kind of unsettled stress of not making any forward progress in my life if I do that for too long. like 'Okay this week I've#done nothing but meet up with two friends & watch like 10 episodes of tv and only worked on a few projects on the side.. this is HORRIBLE!'#(ppl who follow me here that I talk to on discord: this isn't about you! Im specifically just referencing being tired of introductory talks#with a new round of random strangers during my Friend Hunt. Just clarifying so it couldn't be misinterpreted as vaguepost implying that I'm#secretly bothered by talking to you or etc. lol.. anyway) . Which I know to MOST people 'I talked to a lot of friends and watched some cool#stuff!' sounds like a GOOD relaxing time but.. to me it is not ghhj.. Those are 'external' focuses on things outside myself which bothers#me if not moderated. Like.. i MUST retreat internally to work on my worldbuilding and my own thoughts and etc. at very regular intervals or#it will really start to bear on me too much. Brain Mandated Hermit Isolation lol. Just being too detached from my world and stuff for#too long feels increasingly bad. PLUS. every day I don't make tangible progress towards my goals is a day wasted that I could have been#investing in my future by working on novels/games/sculptures/actual career relevant stuff. Not even in a Capitalism way i just genuinely#enjoy Completing Tasks & feel miserable if I don't for too long. EVEN the media I'm watching I turn into A Task since I rank in a detailed#google doc list after viewing lol.. Like EW movie too boring on it's own. NEED to turn it into something I can categorize and analyze ghghj#LOVE to make things more complicated than they need to be. like YAAAY organizational tasks! yaay meticulous sorting!! BOO ''mindless fun''!
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
(upon realizing just how bloodshot the lower half and inner corners of my eyes really are after being sick with the stomach bug this weekend)
the logical part of me: oh. my god. that is horrifying. should I be concerned? that is like. the result of so many blood vessels being burst
the part of me that has to cope with stressful and unpleasant situations with indulgent ideas and find the humor in things otherwise I will just cry: haha hey look me and Julian are twins now
#dumb#ellie rambles#the good news is I'm feeling better!#in an attempt to make myself feel less miserable while sick. I tried to cope by pretending I was dramatically poisoned by a jealous rival#with my f/os doting on and protecting me while I was vulnerable#however. due to constantly being on edge and hyperaware of my body the whole time. this idea was not easily maintained.#did not notice the bloodshot eyes thing until today and WOW. unsettling. and my muscles are still a bit sore. but otherwise I am fine.
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
my headcanon is that pre-avatar Jonathan doesn't like eye contact (hahhaa). not in an uwu shy way, it just makes him uncomfortable. his usual methods of avoiding it being rolling his eyes, glaring slightly to the left or right of someone while they're speaking to him, or taking his glasses off to clean them
#yeah that's the random headcanon I have for today#I just think then there's the potential of it being more unsettling when he starts like. making direct eye contact with people#all like tell me your secrets 👁#echo rambles#the magnus archives#jonathan sims#yes probably autistic jonathan headcanon#I just get sick of autistic = uwu innocent baby. so apologies if I seemed like a little hater there. not my intent
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
..
#the way I’m so used to everything just being chaotic and awful all the time#when things feel good I just feel crazy and unsettled#almost as if I’m having a manic episode#but like sometimes I can’t tell if I’m manic or if I’m just not feeling like everything is falling apart???#idk we’re feeling a lil weird today but like not terrible?#mine#text post
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Anyone else see The Spider at the ass crack of dawn every morning but only when opening your right eye or is that just me?
#this is a joke i know it's a hallucination#i just. need to say something where people can laugh with me instead of being concerned#it only happens when i wake up between like 5 and 6am and it varies from tiny to huge#this morning it looked ai generated and it's ass was yellow and almost bejeweled in how it looked#it's always a weird experience#cause like i know it's not real and i try to touch it to make sure#and I'm not unsettled like i am by a real one#and if i took the spiritual part of my pagan practice more seriously i might take it as a sign#but i know psychosis runs in my family and I've had hallucinations since i was a child#including ones induced by religion#so like I'm skeptical#it's really annoying and stupid though so i want to post where someone might laugh instead of telling me i have to tell my psych right away#like I'll tell her at my next appointment (the end of this month) but she's never been concerned about my hallucinations#i think that's cause i don't get command voices#i just get hallucinations that scare me or keep me awake#idk#i just felt like posting about my hallucinations today#they're always small things so it's not a big deal#anyway#drink water you heathens
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
good news: therapy finally scheduled friday morning. bad news: holy shit i am really spiralling aren't i
#ppl following are like yes obviously but like. sincerely. i think classes are keeping me sane#and all of my friends who i adore and love are completely fucking with me#like today i was at a social event and its the first time ini a while i was like organically socializing with strangers#and seeing my friends do that. and it freaked me the fuck out#i didn't like seeing my friends interacting with people that wasn't our group it genuinely on a bone deep level unsettled me#and now i have like. severe paranoia about one of my best friends. which is making everything like a nightmare for me#i hate that my mental illness has drifted from being a hypothetical to now being like a constant#i hate that my parents pay so much for therapy so i try to go every two weeks and that fucking shatters me#and i really really really hate the circumstances i'm in right now even though if i was a better person this would be the happiest-#-time of my fucking life
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
I was pretty proud of myself for getting through this day so well (first time one of our cats had to have surgery), BUT it's 4am and it's really hitting me now 🙃
#feel like I would be sobbing if my anxiety meds didn't make that.. not harder exactly just. less likely#and I also remembered that I did take lorazepam before going to bed last night specifically because I knew I'd be a mess otherwise...#but yeaaah I just wanna cry now#it's been so hard. the cat is fine. but he's got 20 fewer teeth now and it feels bad#he's in pain and he's grumpy because he doesn't understand why we did that to him and also his brother wouldn't stop hissing at him all day#because he smells wrong and that's been stupidly hard on me#like. those are my babies. they can't be mad at each other??? it scares me. it's not the way it is. it's wrong and I don't like it#also... if I'm being honest I was also quite unsettled by how different he smells so I can understand that. I don't like it but I get it#that's still your brother though you big dumb guy 😭 be nice to him he has barely any teeth left 😭😭😭#I don't liiiike this#I hope they'll get along better again tomorrow bc seriously I can't take this. it's breaking my heart#well I wasn't a mess today but now I definitely am#AND I've got a fucking doctors appointment tomorrow 😭 so I can't even stay on the couch mindlessly watching YouTube all day#life is too hard and I am a big baby and I can't handle it#personal
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
I gotta be less hard on myself. Annoyingly i know that my best work comes from when i am hard on myself. But i keep stopping myself from doing things i want to due to perfectionism. Annoying.
#atm i feel like im just chasing interest after interest after interest#ive been working on my mimecraft base a lot but i have. complex feelings about the base atm#im happy with it and its paradise.#its too paradise that it makes me unsettled#which is nonsense its my place and my build#but i feel a lot of pressure to make it perfect#even though I and vee are the only ones who go there and i dont really care about the likes on my posts anymore#it still makes me feel. odd.#i love the work though i love the style and i love using it as a means to imagine a better world#atm im really enjoying just spending time on the server hanging out with vee#but i get into my own head a lot about the base#its not even just the base im talking about everything but the base is the example#i built a bit of a weird interior today i just went crazy with the terracotta and the plants and a pool of water#and i keep thinking on if it was the 'right' thing to do#and if i will be able to complete it properly to a high enough standard#it also doesnt help that ive improved over the course of the last 2 years in building#so now my house looks off and weird and theres trees that need to be taken down and paths that are over textured#but i find the process of doing it and the feeling of completion really deep and important#i dont know. i feel like im constantly in a battle of pushing myself to be better but limiting myself at the same time by having fun or sthn#i feel like i should be making youtube videos or at least prepping to#but i havent because i cant figure out how to organise mods and its freaking me out. theres just loads of excuses stopping me#i dont know.#the annoying thing is pushing myself creatively has resulted in massive benefits for me lately creatively#partly i think why im feeling odd with the base atm is because ive suddenly gone for being barely able to play an hour a night to having all#the time in the world so its created a sudden influx in development#idk. this is rambly#fish talks#i want to download a minec@ft map and remove the suburban housing to replace with higher density properties becsuse ive been watching too#much socialist urban planning videos again and c1t1es skyl1nes just isnt cutting the cheese rn#thats the wrong saying. fandoms censored to avoid crosstagging
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
haate handling lots of cash. guy gave me a $100 bill for a ten dolar purchase & ik i did the change correctly but im like still mildly terrified i handed him an extra 20 or something -_-
#gonna have 2 triple check when i close tonight... bluhhhh.#txt#anyway HI how r we all. im so tireddd & grumpy u would not believe!#also apparently my unsettling dreams about being extrajudicially executed via shot to the back of the head last night continue to leave#their gross unsettling dream residue all over my day today... who would have guessed -_-
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#i knew going into this petsitting situation i would have two days alone and the days have been okay but the nights#i am so unsettled#i am at this house every week babysitting its my sister's house for fucks sake#but i just feel so uncomfortable and havent been sleeping well#i already took klonopin today and i could technically take another but i dont want to#i just!!!!!#i also feel bad for the dogs csuse one has to be in a crate over night and the other i was sleepjng with but he kept me up#so im hoping i sleep better but im in bed now#cause i couldnt handle being downstairs a moment longer#idk#i just!!!!!!!! im doing the best i can i have to remember that#the dogs are fine#if they make a mess overnight i will clean it up#it will be fine
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Messaging my group asking to reschedule our meeting we were planning for tonight bc I got a cog knocked loose and I think any more fucking socializing today will just about drive me insane.
#speculation nation#negative/#me being like 'well i could In Theory but pushing myself when im already unsettled will not have good results'#i think. i want to knock a few shots back. cook some hamburger helper. and do some dishes.#and maybe even change out the cat litter. if im feeling motivated enough.#the alcohol is Integral to this equation. bc i need to get out of my fucking head for a bit.#i think im having an extended mental breakdown. at Least for the past few days & likely for over a week#but today was just. idfk i just got a cog knocked loose. it happens.#ive been obsessively listening to 'nothing but thieves' which probably is not helping with the extended mental breakdown#like. all things considered.#but im vibing to it. so whether it is just spurring me on or making me have fun with it. who's to say?#anyways i am home and covered in white powder. and i am alive. which is a success in my books 👍#alcohol ment/
0 notes
Text
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d357f153443356b54654f6a57a962e97/f2bc5675dd99f8a2-dc/s540x810/190df4343f8ac30cf4a0cef79cf317cb4f29cb5c.jpg)
do you think the kids of today find websites that haven’t loaded in correctly, so you can see their strange bones, to be as… fundamentally unnerving as turning the tv to static was to us? Or when you somehow cracked a game open to a way it was never supposed to function, and the Wrongness of it got to you? Or even just if a menu was formatted Wrong somehow, and you couldn't explain it, it was just off. This sort of thing is not loud, like the static was, or particularly sudden (you see glimpses of a website’s bones as it loads in), but does the starkness still leave a sense of unease?
#my posts#Or alternatively i was a strange kid for being afraid of the static. The glitches. The strange stark moments of this is Incorrect and that#can absolutely hurt you#in my defense the television i grew up gaming on had a short circuit. It felt alive#It’s a delicious fear that goes down to my bones. If this is a thing that unsettles the kids today then… i suppose ive grown out of it#In some sort of sense. It doesnt hit the same. But its the same idea#and that’s sort of sad. But i wish the next generation a very please make some rocking ass creepypasta about it
1 note
·
View note