#but today was just. idfk i just got a cog knocked loose. it happens.
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Messaging my group asking to reschedule our meeting we were planning for tonight bc I got a cog knocked loose and I think any more fucking socializing today will just about drive me insane.
#speculation nation#negative/#me being like 'well i could In Theory but pushing myself when im already unsettled will not have good results'#i think. i want to knock a few shots back. cook some hamburger helper. and do some dishes.#and maybe even change out the cat litter. if im feeling motivated enough.#the alcohol is Integral to this equation. bc i need to get out of my fucking head for a bit.#i think im having an extended mental breakdown. at Least for the past few days & likely for over a week#but today was just. idfk i just got a cog knocked loose. it happens.#ive been obsessively listening to 'nothing but thieves' which probably is not helping with the extended mental breakdown#like. all things considered.#but im vibing to it. so whether it is just spurring me on or making me have fun with it. who's to say?#anyways i am home and covered in white powder. and i am alive. which is a success in my books ๐#alcohol ment/
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