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#being confident in those deep and meaningful relationships
cyberclouddream · 2 days
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How to Spot: Water Signs Edition
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Cancer Rising
- emotionally reactive and take everything personally; their sensitivity is off the charts so they approach new people cautiously
- appear maternal, caring, and empathetic but their mood swings are noticeable; if you make them feel disrespected or unsafe they withdraw and shut down
- expensive spenders, investing in flashy things to feel better about themselves; their need to appear wealthy can lead to financial stability, as their self-worth is tied to how much they have
- constantly worry that they’re being misunderstood or that they’re words are imperfect; their siblings or neighbors might feel like they’re overly analytical or nitpicky
- obsessed with creating the perfect home, and their need for balance can cause them to avoid confrontation at home, leading to passive-aggression there
- easily jealous and need to feel emotionally secure in romantic relationships, and tend to take their desires too far
- hate being tied down to schedules, craving flexibility so much in their day-to-day life that can lead to a chaotic lifestyle l
- tend to attract partners who are older or more established, drawn to those who are stable and dependable
- distant yet controlling, justifying it by saying they’re just being responsible
- intellectualize things too much when it comes to intimacy and deep emotional transformations, avoiding getting too emotional
- come off spacey or unrealistic when they discuss their beliefs or travel plans, rarely committing to concepts or places
- bold and assertive in their career but may rub people the wrong way; they push hard for the top but their impatience can sabotage them
- social life is usually built around people they’ve known for years, and they don’t adapt well to changes in social dynamics; they have a knack for getting in with the right people
- emotional escapist, intellectualizing their emotions in an almost clinical way but the emotional truth remains untouched
- fill their head with noise and distractions to avoid dealing with the raw emotional pain, which can cause them to be prisoners of their own mind; this can lead to insomnia and anxiety
Scorpio Rising
- magnetic and intimidating at the same time, drawing people in with an impenetrable boundary
- often go through major life upheavals, handling it with an icy resolve
- their moral compass is shaped by experience and their gut instincts rather than tradition
- aren’t afraid to task risks with their finances, usually because they believe they will always bounce back
- people may find them too intense or driven, but they’re on a mission to win, even in mundane areas of life
- they hate idle gossip or shallow talk and would rether have deep, meaningful conversations; they prefer to have control over thoughts and words, wanting to be understood on their own terms
- often feel alienated at home, even if it’s self-imposed; they prioritize mental freedom over family ties
- attract odd living situations or have an abnormal family dynamic
- get lost in their creative pursuits and when they fall in love with someone, it’s all-consuming
- at work they’re fiercely competitive, even if they don’t make it obvious; if you’re slacking at work they may call you out mercilessly
- often push themselves to the point of burnout, and may expect the same intensity from others
- can be possessive and overly demanding in love, preferring those who offers stability without making them feel vulnerable; jealousy is always lurking underneath the surface
- ask a lot of questions in sensitive topics, but don’t expect them to answer any in return
- retreat into their shell if their beliefs are challenged or if they feel insecure about their knowledge
- often obtain high positions or become well-known in their field; their career success is frequently linked to their ability to project confidence and control
- have a small, tight-knit group of friends who serve specific roles or purposes
- they want their inner world to be aesthetically-pleasing and orderly, which can cause them to face challenges with reconciling their idealistic and emotional needs with reality
Pisces Rising
- they have a vague, dreamy demeanor and a tendency to blend in rather than stand out; they’ll end up being whatever you want them to be without realizing it
- people either feel drawn to their seemingly compassionate nature or find them frustratingly inconsistent
- they act fast to make money but just as quickly blow through it; they may struggle with jobs that require any real focus or consistency
- they prefer slow, comfortable conversations that don’t rock the boat, withdrawing when things get too deep or challenging for their idealistic world
- they’re not the most articulate, preferring to convey emotions through art, music, or some indirect form of communication
- likely to live in several places over their lifetime, since they can’t settle one what an open and free home feels like
- they are sentimental and often romanticize the past, partners, or projects, which can lead to melodrama and disappointment
- prone to neglecting themselves until a dramatic situation forced them to pay attention; desire to be the center of attention without putting in real effort in their routines
- attract partners who want to “fix” them, which can feel patronizing or irritating; they may end up in codependent relationships where their partner micromanages them
- prefer to avoid responsibility in financial or intimate matters; they can feel dependent or even resentful in shared financial matters
- end up with complex, unspoken beliefs that are hard to share with anyone, and they can get lost in the quest for these hidden truths
- they may inspire others with their idealism but struggle with consistency and discipline; they just want their work to feel meaningful and expansive
- they carefully choose friendships that benefit them on the long-run, and may came off cold or distant when maintaining these relationships
- may idealize being a “lone wolf” but won’t admit it outright, even to themselves
- they’re chaotic and detached from emotional expectations, prone to sudden and erratic shifts in their mental state that makes them hard to understand
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vulpinesaint · 4 days
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man. that anxious attachment style can preoccupied
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esotericalchemist · 1 month
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Darakaraka - Your Spouse
Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)
In Vedic Astrology, Darakaraka is a term that represents your future spouse or partner. It is found by looking at the planet with the lowest degree in your birth chart. This special planet gives insight into the personality and qualities of your significant other and the nature of your relationship. Essentially, Darakaraka helps you understand more about who you might end up with and what your marriage could be like.
HOW TO FIND IT?
Darakaraka is found by looking at the planet with the lowest degree in your birth chart. The planets that can be your Darakaraka are: The Sun, Moon, Mars, Mercury, Jupiter, Venus, and Saturn. Rahu and Ketu are NOT considered.
Step 1: Convert the birth chart to Vedic/Sidereal.
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Step 2: Find the planet with the lowest degree
Now that we have converted the birth chart to the sidereal system, we can identify the planet with the lowest degree. Remember, only the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn are involved. In the birth chart above, the planet with the lowest degree is Venus.
NOW THAT YOU HAVE FOUND YOUR DARAKARAKA, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE MEANING!
☉︎ - Sun as Darakaraka
When the Sun is your Darakaraka, it indicates that your future spouse will embody qualities of confidence, leadership, and a strong sense of identity. The Sun represents authority, vitality, and self-expression, so your partner is likely to be someone who naturally takes on a leadership role and shines brightly in whatever they do.
This person is likely to have a powerful presence, someone who stands out and commands attention. They are confident and self-assured, often knowing exactly what they want in life and how to achieve it. Their sense of purpose is clear, and they are driven by a desire to succeed and make a meaningful impact. They may hold a position of authority or be well-respected in their field, with a natural ability to inspire and lead others.
In your relationship, a Sun Darakaraka partner will bring a sense of vibrancy and dynamism. They are likely to seek a relationship where both partners can thrive, supporting each other's ambitions and growing together. They value mutual respect and are drawn to a partner who can match their energy and enthusiasm for life. While they may sometimes appear dominant or strong-willed, this comes from a place of deep care and a desire to create a successful and fulfilling life together.
This person is also likely to have a strong moral compass, valuing integrity and truth in themselves and others. They appreciate honesty and expect the same in their relationships, often striving to build a connection that is based on mutual trust and understanding. Their passionate nature means they will be deeply committed to their partner, always working to keep the relationship vibrant and alive.
However, their strong personality can sometimes come across as overwhelming, especially if they feel that their leadership is being challenged. It's important to understand that their desire to take charge is rooted in their natural inclination to protect and guide those they love.
With a Sun Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is full of energy, ambition, and mutual respect. This partnership will likely be characterized by a shared vision for the future, a strong commitment to each other's growth, and a deep, vibrant connection that encourages both partners to shine in their own unique ways.
☽︎ - Moon as Darakaraka
When the Moon is your Darakaraka, it indicates that your future spouse will be someone who is deeply emotional, nurturing, and intuitive. The Moon is associated with feelings, inner life, and the subconscious, so your partner is likely to have a gentle and caring nature, with a strong emphasis on emotional connection and understanding.
This person is highly sensitive and attuned to the emotions of others. They have a natural ability to empathize and often find themselves in roles where they provide comfort and support to those around them. Their nurturing nature means they prioritize the well-being of their loved ones, often putting the needs of others before their own. This makes them a deeply caring and considerate partner, someone who seeks to create a safe and harmonious environment in the relationship.
In your relationship, a Moon Darakaraka partner will bring a deep emotional connection. They will seek a relationship that is intimate and emotionally fulfilling, where both partners can be open and vulnerable with each other. They value security and stability, and they are likely to work hard to ensure that the relationship is a source of comfort and refuge for both of you.
This person is also likely to be very intuitive, often understanding your needs and feelings without you having to express them. They appreciate a partner who is sensitive to their emotions and who can reciprocate the level of care and attention they provide. Their affectionate nature means they will often show love through small, thoughtful gestures, creating a warm and loving atmosphere in the relationship.
However, their sensitivity can sometimes make them prone to mood swings or emotional ups and downs. It is important to offer them understanding and patience during these times, as they are deeply affected by the emotional dynamics around them.
With a Moon Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is rich in emotional depth, nurturing, and focused on creating a strong, supportive bond. This partnership will likely be characterized by mutual care, emotional intimacy, and a deep sense of belonging, where both partners feel truly understood and cherished.
☿ - Mercury as Darakaraka
When Mercury is your Darakaraka, it suggests that your future spouse will be someone who is intellectually curious, communicative, and quick-witted. Mercury is associated with communication, intellect, and adaptability, so your partner is likely to be someone who values mental connection and enjoys engaging in stimulating conversations.
This person is naturally inquisitive, always eager to learn and share knowledge. They are likely to be versatile, with a wide range of interests and a talent for navigating different situations with ease. Their ability to articulate ideas clearly and persuasively makes them excellent communicators, and they often thrive in environments where they can interact with others and exchange ideas.
In your relationship, a Mercury Darakaraka partner will seek a strong mental connection. They will value a partner who can engage in lively discussions, share their intellectual interests, and keep up with their dynamic and often playful nature. Communication is key for them, and they will appreciate open and honest exchanges of thoughts and feelings.
This person is also likely to be adaptable and flexible, enjoying variety and change in their life. They might be drawn to new experiences and enjoy exploring different perspectives, which can bring a sense of freshness and excitement to the relationship. While they can sometimes be restless or easily distracted, their curiosity and enthusiasm are what drive them to continually grow and evolve.
With a Mercury Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is mentally stimulating, filled with communication, and characterized by a shared love of learning and discovery. This partnership is likely to be lively and engaging, with both partners supporting each other's intellectual and personal growth.
♀ - Venus as Darakaraka
When Venus is your Darakaraka, it indicates that your future spouse will embody the qualities of love, beauty, and harmony. Venus is the planet associated with affection, art, and sensuality, so your partner is likely to be someone who deeply values relationships, aesthetics, and the pleasures of life.
This person is naturally loving, charming, and romantic, with a strong desire to create a life filled with beauty and joy. They are likely to have a refined sense of taste, appreciating art, music, and all forms of beauty. Their warm and affectionate nature makes them a loving and attentive partner, someone who is deeply invested in the emotional and physical aspects of the relationship.
In your relationship, a Venus Darakaraka partner will seek to build a connection that is filled with love, harmony, and mutual appreciation. They value romance and will likely go out of their way to make you feel cherished and adored. They are also highly attuned to the emotional needs of their partner and strive to create a relationship that is balanced, supportive, and deeply fulfilling.
This person may have a strong aesthetic sense and may enjoy surrounding themselves with beauty, whether in their environment, the way they dress, or in their approach to life. They are likely to be very sensual, enjoying the physical aspects of love and connection, and they will seek a partner who shares these values and desires.
While they may sometimes be idealistic or overly focused on creating the "perfect" relationship, their intentions are rooted in a genuine desire for love and harmony. With a Venus Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is rich in affection, romance, and a shared appreciation for the finer things in life. This partnership will likely be characterized by a deep emotional connection, a strong focus on mutual satisfaction, and a harmonious, loving bond.
♂ - Mars as Darakaraka
When Mars is your Darakaraka, it suggests that your future spouse will embody the qualities of passion, drive, and assertiveness. Mars is the planet associated with energy, action, and determination, so your partner is likely to be someone who is dynamic, courageous, and highly motivated.
This person is naturally assertive and has a strong sense of purpose. They are not afraid to take risks and are often seen as a go-getter, someone who actively pursues their goals with determination and intensity. Their approach to life is bold and direct, and they value honesty and straightforwardness in themselves and others.
In your relationship, a Mars Darakaraka partner will bring a great deal of passion and energy. They are likely to seek a relationship that is exciting and full of vitality, where both partners are actively engaged in pursuing their goals together. They appreciate a partner who is equally passionate and who can match their intensity, whether in the pursuit of shared ambitions or in the emotional and physical aspects of the relationship.
This person is also likely to be protective and loyal, with a strong instinct to stand up for their loved ones. They value strength and independence in a partner and are drawn to relationships that are dynamic and mutually empowering. However, their assertiveness can sometimes come across as impatience or a tendency to be overly competitive, so it's important for them to find balance and ensure that their drive does not overshadow the needs of the relationship.
With a Mars Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is full of passion, energy, and action. This partnership will likely be characterized by a strong sense of adventure, mutual support in pursuing goals, and a deep, fiery connection that keeps the relationship vibrant and alive.
♃ - Jupiter as Darakaraka
When Jupiter is your Darakaraka, it indicates that your future spouse will embody the qualities of wisdom, optimism, and expansiveness. Jupiter is the planet associated with growth, knowledge, and abundance, so your partner is likely to be someone who is naturally positive, generous, and deeply interested in personal and spiritual growth.
This person is likely to have a strong sense of purpose and a broad perspective on life. They are often seen as wise and philosophical, with a natural inclination towards teaching, guiding, or mentoring others. Their optimism is contagious, and they are skilled at seeing the bigger picture, often encouraging those around them to aim higher and reach their fullest potential.
In your relationship, a Jupiter Darakaraka partner will bring a sense of expansiveness and joy. They will seek a relationship that is based on mutual growth, where both partners are encouraged to explore new ideas, experiences, and philosophies. They value honesty, trust, and a strong moral foundation in a relationship, often aiming to create a partnership that is not only loving but also enriching on a deeper level.
This person is also likely to be generous and supportive, always ready to lend a helping hand or offer encouragement. They appreciate a partner who shares their enthusiasm for learning and growing together, whether through travel, education, or spiritual pursuits. Their love for exploration and expansion might lead them to seek out new adventures, making your relationship dynamic and full of opportunities for mutual development.
While their expansive nature is a strength, it can sometimes lead them to be overly idealistic or to set expectations that are difficult to meet. However, their intentions are always rooted in a desire for mutual upliftment and a vision of a bright, abundant future together.
With a Jupiter Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is optimistic, growth-oriented, and deeply fulfilling. This partnership will likely be characterized by a strong sense of shared purpose, intellectual and spiritual connection, and a joyful, expansive approach to life together.
♄ - Saturn as Darakaraka
When Saturn is your Darakaraka, it indicates that your future spouse will embody qualities of discipline, responsibility, and stability. Saturn is the planet associated with structure, hard work, and wisdom gained through experience, so your partner is likely to be someone who is serious, reliable, and committed.
This person is likely to have a strong sense of duty and a deep understanding of life's challenges. They may have faced significant hardships or responsibilities early in life, which have shaped them into someone who values perseverance and resilience. They are often seen as mature beyond their years, with a cautious and thoughtful approach to life. Their presence brings a sense of security and grounding, making them someone you can rely on in any situation.
In your relationship, a Saturn Darakaraka partner will bring a sense of stability and long-term commitment. They are not likely to rush into anything, preferring to build a solid foundation based on mutual respect, trust, and shared values. They value loyalty and are deeply committed to the people they care about, often willing to put in the hard work necessary to maintain and strengthen the relationship over time.
This person is also likely to be very patient and practical, often taking a measured and strategic approach to both life and love. They appreciate a partner who shares their sense of responsibility and who is willing to work together to build a secure and lasting future. While they may sometimes come across as reserved or overly serious, this is because they take their commitments very seriously and want to ensure that they are making the right choices.
However, their cautious nature can sometimes lead to a tendency to be overly rigid or pessimistic, especially if they feel that things are not progressing as planned. It is important to understand that their carefulness stems from a deep desire to protect and nurture what they have built.
With a Saturn Darakaraka partner, you can expect a relationship that is stable, enduring, and built on a strong foundation of trust and mutual respect. This partnership will likely be characterized by a deep sense of commitment, a shared dedication to long-term goals, and a mutual understanding of the importance of patience and perseverance in building a lasting and meaningful connection.
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literatureloverx · 27 days
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N A K A H A R A C H U U Y A
mild NSFW headcanons
Mdni, ideal type! fem!reader, slightly lovesick Chuuya, dom!Chuuya, switch!Chuuya, switch!reader, sub!reader.
I’m so excited about this. I hope it doesn’t disappoint anyone!🧡
Headcanons under the pictures. Enjoy.
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Chuuya exudes the confidence of a man who is active in his sexual life, with a strong reputation among women—he excels at whatever he does.
With his mastery of the art of "living in the moment," it's easy to imagine that he's incredibly skilled in bed, to the point where women practically throw themselves at his feet.
As a mafia executive, however, he must be cautious.
I envision him only engaging in sexual relationships with individuals who have ties to the mafia themselves (not his colleagues, but rather civilians connected to the underworld—he has standards).
l don't see him as someone who sleeps around casually (that would be more like Dazai, Imao-just joking), but rather as someone selective with his partners and highly aware of his sexuality.
Despite his caution, I believe he's very experienced.
He likely has a degradation kink, which surfaces whenever he feels the need to blow off steam.
I see him as exclusively dominant with people he's not very close to—or rather, with those he has no emotional connection to.
Given his busy lifestyle, he barely has time to form meaningful, romantic relationships, so sex is probably just a way for him to relax and assert control.
He would prefer positions where he maintains 100% control and doesn't feel vulnerable with his partner, such as doggy style, standing behind, prone bone, the flatiron, over the edge, face down-ass up, or kneeling behind.
He would definitely be the type to insist on using condoms, not trusting the other person with protection.
However, all of this changes with... you, his ideal type.
With you, his beloved princess, his demeanor softens significantly.
He truly wants to spoil you, especially if you're a virgin. If you're not-well, it doesn't change anything, because it doesn't matter to him.
He will spoil you sexually, no matter what.
I see Chuuya as a service dom, someone who prioritizes your pleasure and well-being, but who can also take on a more submissive role if his dear princess desires.
This dynamic makes him a switch, though he clearly prefers dominating you. When he's with you, Chuuya would trust you completely, making love to you deeply and sensually.
The experience would be incredibly intimate for both of you, as he wants you to feel all of his love, just as he wishes to feel yours in return through the act.
Chuuya would love to see your face while making love, so he would naturally gravitate towards positions that keep you close and allow for deep eye contact.
He would cherish moments where he can hold you in his arms, whether it's in a classic missionary position with your legs wrapped around him, or when you're on top in cowgirl, where he allows you to take the lead and dominate him.
A modified missionary, with your chests pressed together, would also be a favorite for the intimacy it brings.
Additionally, Chuuya would enjoy other positions that allow him to stay close to you, like the butterfly position, where you're lying on the edge of the bed with him between your legs, or the lotus position, where you're wrapped around each other, face to face.
He might also relish the intensity of the captive position, where he can see every reaction on your face, or making love up against the wall, where you can share deep, passionate eye contact.
In all these moments, his focus would be entirely on you, ensuring that you both feel an intense, loving connection.
If you're a virgin, Chuuya's demeanor would become even softer and sweeter, mixed with a touch of nervousness as he aims to ensure that nothing goes wrong or upsets you during the act.
He would start with the classic missionary position to gently ease you into the moment and your first experience.
His chest would swell with pride, knowing that you have chosen him and that he is the one privileged to guide you through this new experience.
Throughout the encounter, he would be highly protective of you, a protectiveness that borders on possessiveness and territorial behavior.
As he makes love to you, he might growl and moan softly against your skin, marking you thoroughly as if he were a predator claiming his territory.
This blend of tenderness and dominance would ensure that you feel both cherished and secure in his embrace.
Note: call him filthy names and you won’t be able to walk for two weeks straight.
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desperate-gay · 1 year
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can i request you write a leah fic based on the song constellations by jade lemac
Constellations
Leah Williamson x fem!reader
SMUT 18+
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Leah Williamson has a reputation for sleeping around. People use more harsh terms to describe her, but that feels wrong since you know her. Well, you don’t know her; you play alongside her for the England national team and Arsenal. Once in a while, you both have a conversation, but nothing too deep.
Although, recently, the blonde has been approaching you more and more. Whether it was on the pitch during training, in the locker room, or even at team get-togethers.
You’d think she’d want to get to know more about you before flirting with you constantly, but hey, she’s got that reputation for a reason. She sees what she wants, and she goes for what she wants, and most of the time, she gets what she wants.
Now, of course, you find Leah attractive; anyone with eyes should. That doesn’t mean you’re just going to bend over for her. You never liked the idea of having one-night stands with one of your teammates and going back to training the next day like nothing happened. You also never liked the idea of sleeping around with anyone. It’s exhausting to invite someone into your bed just so they can fuck you and leave the same night.
You have always wanted a meaningful, loving relationship. Sure, you had your fair share in the past, but those obviously all ended up in the dump. None of which made you feel exhilarated. And the fact that the player on the team now wants to get into your pants is quite annoying.
Keira and Lucy always warn Leah to stay away from you. You’re the sunshine of the group that never fails to make someone smile. They didn’t want her to take that spark away from you. Alessia and Ella always glare at the defender’s attempts to flirt with you. You three are considered the gigglers of the lionesses. You guys are usually never seen without one another unless you are with your favorite person in the whole world, Esme Morgan.
If you aren’t with Tooney or Lessi, you are most definitely with the smiley gal. The two of you have the brightest smiles and most infectious laughs ever. Both are the kindest beings anyone could meet on this earth, plus, to mention, you two basically grew up together.
So when Esme found out what was happening, her usual chippy personality turned bitter. She knows Leah’s intentions, and she doesn’t want that anywhere near you. People may call her particularly protective over you, but she just doesn’t want to see you hurt is all.
When you noticed her attitude switch whenever the flirtatious blonde approached you, you assured her there was nothing to worry about.
Practice has just ended, so everyone is getting changed in the locker room. You are pulling your shirt over your head when you hear someone approaching you.
“You looked quite fit out there, darling.”
You whip around and see the one person who has enough confidence to say something like that with no hesitation.
“Thank you.” You say, looking down bashfully, never really knowing how to take compliments. The taller girl notices the red that starts to appear at the tip of your ears and smirks to herself.
She places her right hand on your hip before leaning in close to your ear. “You always look fit, my dear.” She whispers before moving your body to the side to walk past you. Your eyes follow her path with your mouth slightly open.
Ella, Alessia, Lucy, and Esme all watch the interaction happen with clenched jaws and piercing eyes. Keira doesn’t have the heart to be angry at her best friend, but she does sigh and look down to continue packing her kit. Leah can feel multiple eyes trailing her, but she doesn’t let it bother her. Overall, it’s your choice what happens between you two, not theirs.
Once you’re done with changing, Esme offers you a ride home so she can hang out and steal your ice cream. You, of course, accept her offer, wanting to spend more time with your best friend. When you get into her car, you plug in your phone to the aux cord and play your guy’s playlist in the background.
“Besides stealing all of my food, what do you plan on doing when we get to my home?”
She hums as a sign she’s trying to think of an answer. “I’m not sure yet; I haven’t gotten that far.” You scoff at her teasing smile and quickly return it.
As you pull into the parking space in front of your loft, you notice a man standing on concrete with a bouquet of multiple different flowers, looking confused. You and Esme step out of the car, and you make your way towards the stranger.
“Excuse me, sir. Do you need help with anything?” The young man gives a clumsy smile and nods his head.
“You don’t by chance know a ughh, Y/n Y/l/n around here, do you?”
"Umm, that, ironically, would be me.” Your face scrunches up in confusion, while Esme’s does the same. The man gently hands you the flowers, saying someone sent them to you.
“You just have to sign here, please, to let the company know you’ve received your flowers in perfect condition.” He exaggerates as you fake solute, asking the blonde next to you to hold the flowers. You sign the paper and say a quick goodbye before moving up a few steps to your front door to unlock it.
“Who in the world sent flowers to you?” She teases, taking her shoes off and handing you the flowers. You place your nose right over the flowers to smell them.
“Your guess is as good as mine.” All you do is shrug your shoulders before moving around to look for a vase. You set the flowers in the center of the table and go to join Esme on the sofa. She grabs the remote and puts on Modern Family. You look over and notice a sour expression on her face. Reaching over, you poke her cheek to make her look over at you. “What’s up, Ez?”
“I bet I know who sent the flowers.” She grumbles with her arms crossed, still looking at the television. After thinking about it briefly, you finally understand who she’s referring to. She wouldn’t have that familiar scowl for just anybody.
“Hey, even if it was her, there’s no need to worry about anything. She sleeps around, and that’s something I don’t like, remember?” She turns her head towards you and has a semi-sad expression.
“I just don’t want to see you get hurt. I see the way you blush around her.” Her voice is soft, along with her facial features. You reach over and grab her hand to squeeze it.
“I know you don’t, and I love that about you. Yes, I find Leah attractive, but she doesn’t want anything serious, and I’m not putting myself in that situation.” Esme nods in understanding, and you both turn your attention back to the show in comfortable silence.
“Did you see the gift I sent you?”
You’re on the pitch stretching before training starts when Leah comes over to you. You sigh and stand up to turn towards her. "Yes, I did; they were beautiful, but I’m still trying to figure out why I got them.”
“Because a beautiful girl deserves beautiful things.” She smiles without breaking eye contact. You playfully roll your eyes at her and bend down to touch your toes.
“I bet you say that to all the girls.”
It’s silent for a minute before the taller girl blurts, “Go on a date with me tonight.”
You quickly straighten your posture and give her all your attention. Your eyebrows furrowed at the demand. “Pardon?”
“Let me take you out tonight. I know just the place.” She notices your hesitation, so she places a hand on your waist. “C’mon, dinner and maybe some sex?”
You scoff at her forward statement and start to walk away. “No.”
“Fine, just sex.” She follows after you. No one is near you two, so no one can hear what’s happening. You stop and turn around.
“How about just dinner?”
“Ehhhh.”
“Then no.”
You move to continue to walk away before her hand reaches out to grip your wrist. “Okay, okay. Just dinner.”
It turns out you and Leah only live about two blocks from one another, so when it’s time to pick you up, she decides to walk over. The place she has made reservations for is right across the street from your place. Leah let you know beforehand that the place you’ll be eating at isn’t too fancy, so just dress casually.
You’re finishing up the last minor touches on your makeup when you hear a knock at your door. Quickly, you grab your purse, phone, and keys and rush to open the door. Leah looks over, smiling, and offers you her hand to take once you lock the door. She’s wearing a white dress shirt along with tan baggy jeans, while you wear black leggings with a light blue tank top.
The date overall goes great. When you get seated, Leah being the gentlewoman she is, pulls out your seat for you and pushes you in. You both get to know each other better and laugh at the random stories you tell each other.
Your arm is hooked on Leah’s as you both laugh and walk towards your home. You stop right before you reach your stairs and look at her with a smile. “I had a lot of fun tonight, thank you.” The keys dangle in your hand, and then Leah reaches and steals them for you.
“Let me help you with your flowers.” She smiles smugly, keeping the keys behind her shoulder.
“No, we just met tonight.”
“We have known each other for years. We play for the same teams.” Your faces are close together as you giggle.
“We might play together, but that doesn’t mean we know each other. Tonight was our first step in actually getting to know one another.”
“C’mon.” She leans even closer, trying to tempt you. Your eyes wander at her face before you pull back slightly.
“You can’t come up.” You say with all the willpower you have left. She sure knows how to get a girl to swoon. “You have to woo me first.”
You dramatically flip your hair, making the taller girl laugh at your antics. Her laughter dies down, and she places her hand on the small of your back to pull you closer. “I can definitely woo you if you let me up.”
You laugh again and press your hands to her chest. “I don’t want this to be a one-night thing.” You whisper while looking her in the eyes. Pecking her cheek, you take quick action to grab your keys and run up the stairs. Once you unlock your door, you turn your attention to the starstruck girl. “Goodnight, Leah.”
Surprisingly, Leah asks you on a second date the day after. Esme doesn’t like the sound of it, but she can’t control what you do, so she just accepts it.
Once again, Leah picks you up from your house, and you both walk to the unknown destination of your date. She said it’s about a 20-minute walk before getting you. On arrival, you see a bright neon sign saying arcade.
“You didn’t.” You excitedly say and smile at the blonde.
“Are you ready to get your butt beat?”
Through the date, you both challenge each other in multiple games like air hockey, racing games, etc. So when it comes down to your tiebreaker, Leah challenges you in one last game of basketball. You both put the tokens in and press the button to play against each other and once the buzzer tells you to go, you both start making shots left and right. Leah looks over and grabs one of your basketballs to palm it and hold it in the air.
“Hey! That’s cheating!” You look at the score and see she has a few more points than you. The taller girl smirks as you try to reach for the ball that's in her hand. With her other free hand, she pushes against your back to pull you closer to her, and she leans down, pressing her lips against yours. You’re shocked at the quick action, but you stop trying for the ball that’s above your head and wrap your arms around her neck.
You pull away when the whistle signals the game is done. Both of your guy’s eyes remain on the other’s lips, still a little hazed from the kiss.
“I win.” She whispers, making you wonder if she's talking about the game or you.
The next date is a simple stroll downtown, visiting all the little stores. Your hands stay interlocked while walking up and down the streets.
In one of the buildings you go into, you see a photo booth and beg Leah to go with you. After a few seconds of you pleading, she finally says yes and lets you drag her to the curtain-covered box. The first photo you take is just one of you guys smiling at the camera. The second one is both of you sticking your tongues out and crossing your eyes. The third is a little blurry because of the two of you laughing and moving to hunch over. Then the fourth and final photo contains both of you gazing at each other with loving looks in your eyes. Soon after the last photo is taken, you both lean in for a feverish kiss.
You grab the photo strip from the outside of the booth and smile at the photos. You start to complain that there’s only one strip, but she insists you take it, knowing you want it the most.
After an hour or two more of exploring the town, she walks you up your stairs to your front door. Your hands softly grab the back of her neck and pull her in for a sweet kiss. When you pull away, she chases after your lips with a whine, causing you to giggle. You place one final peck on her lips and whisper, “Goodnight, Leah.”
Looking in the mirror, you put on your earrings and step back to look at your dress. It’s a scarlet red dress that hugs your body just right. The back of it cuts low to the lower part of your back, and the front shows the perfect amount of cleavage. The necklace that hangs from your neck fits perfectly with it. Smoothing out the fabric, you hear the familiar rhythm of the knock on your door.
Leah stands there in all her glory in a gray, sleeveless pantsuit. The outfit shows off her toned arms and collarbones perfectly. You let out a breath you don’t know you’re holding, and take her awaiting hand. She presses a kiss to your fingertips and says, “You look beautiful, sweetheart.”
You blush at the name and also compliment her back. She walks you towards an unfamiliar car and opens the passenger door for you.
“I figured we should drive this time. I’m sure it won’t be comfortable walking in those shoes.” She points at your short heels. It makes you realize that for all of your dates, you always walked to your destination. You smile at her consideration for your comfort and get in the car. While she drives, she places her hand on your knee and rubs her thumb up and down.
When she pulls up to the fancy restaurant, she rushes to your side of the car and opens the door for you, holding her other hand out for you to grab to help you get out. Walking in, you hear soft orchestral music playing through the building, along with people’s conversations merging and the echoing of silverware clinking together. It wasn’t loud; it was quite relaxing. Leah and you approach the podium with a girl standing behind it with a smile on her face. Leah’s hand stays at the small of your back to guide you and also just to feel you.
“Hello, what can I help you with tonight?” The host asks in a sweet tone.
“Hi, I made a reservation.”
“Sure! Under what name would that be?” The girl taps on the touch screen in front of her to check for the name.
“Leah Williamson.” The blonde nods softly at the host.
“Great! Now if you’d like to follow me, I’ll show you to your seats.” Leah smiles and keeps her hand on your back as you follow the girl. She pulls out your chair for you, just like she did on your first date. “The waiter will be here to take your orders shortly.” The host smiles at the two of you and makes her way back to the front.
You both ordered your desired dishes along with some dessert to share. You’re both laughing when a random girl comes over and places her hand on Leah’s shoulder, making you frown at the action. The blonde turns over and sees a semi-familiar face.
“Hey Leah, I haven’t seen you since that crazy night at the club.” The random girl continues to rub one of her hands up and down Leah’s shoulder as if you weren’t there. Leah just politely smiles and greets her. The girl tries to continue a conversation when you pick up two of your empty dishes and hand them to her.
“Thank you so much; the food was amazing.” Leah turns her head at you with a smile as the random girl gives you a strange look, but walks away with the dishes anyway. You grab your glass of wine and slowly sip it while staring at the walking figure, but you’re interrupted by the laughter coming from across the table.
“What was that?” She chuckles, and you give her a knowing look. She shakes her head with a soft smile displayed on her lips.
Once Leah pulls up to the sidewalk of your home, she walks you up to your door and pulls you in for a kiss. It’s not very long, but she backs away and places a kiss on your knuckles. The blonde moves down one stair and turns to walk away, but gets stopped by your hand continuing to grip hers. Her eyes meet yours as you nod your head towards the house.
“Why don’t you come in for a drink? Their wine wasn’t all that good.” Leah nods her head and smiles while you drag her inside.
You both were already tipsy from the restaurant, so adding more alcohol to your systems is like adding fuel to a fire. Hands are roaming each other’s bodies whenever you can, and you both feel just as fuzzy-headed. Music plays on your surround system around the house while both of you find comfortable positions across from each other on the couch, and Leah leans over and brushes a string of hair behind your ear.
“You look absolutely stunnin’ right now. Cheeks all rosy, hair a little messy. So beautiful.” She whispers toward the end because she’s too busy leaning in. Her lips lightly brush against yours, allowing you to pull away if needed. You maneuver yourself forward, pressing your lips together with more force, which makes the blonde smile slightly. Hands fall to your waist and start to pull you in even closer.
“You’re really good at that.” You breathlessly whisper, keeping your hands on her shoulders as she keeps hers on your hips. Your eyes flutter close when the defender moves her nose to touch yours, teasing her lips at the side of your mouth.
“I know I am.” That cocky personality comes back stronger than ever, so before you can scold her, she slams her lips back on yours and glides her tongue into your mouth, causing you to gasp, which allows her to push her tongue even further. She bites down on your bottom lip and pulls it, tugging it toward her before letting it go with a pop. You kiss down her jawline, eventually even further to her neck. Her hands find a place on your ass and guide you to start rocking your hips a little, encouraging you to keep sucking at her sweet spot.
She abruptly stands up with her hands remaining in their initial place, holding you up with her with your legs wrapped around her waist. “Where’s your bedroom?” She asks, breath ghosting of your face.
“Down the hall, last door on the right.”
You attach your lips back to hers as she blindly makes her way to your bedroom, trying not to crash into anything. Once she steps foot into the room, her foot kicks your door closed, and she pins you against it. The music can still be heard from the speakers, making the mood even hotter. The taste of wine can still be found in both of your mouths as you make out against the wooden door.
“How are you so good-looking all the time?” Leah mutters, moving over to your bed and placing you on the soft sheets.
“How are you so good-looking all the time?” You counter back, sitting up so you're face-to-face with the other girl. Her finger slips under one of the straps of your dress, slowly pulling it down while peppering kisses down your shoulder. She repeats the action on the opposite side and drags your dress down your body, still trailing kisses along with it. Once it’s off, she throws it somewhere on the floor and takes quick action to unclip your strapless bra. “It’s unfair that you’re still dressed and I’m not.”
“Well, you’re the one who’s about to get fucked into this mattress.” She rasps, plunging her lips to your neck to start sucking and biting at the flesh. Your hips buck into hers when she finds the perfect spot and nibbles on it. Her hands make work of your breasts, making you jump at the cold feeling of her rings on your warmed-up skin.
Finally, her fingers make it to the waistband of your pants, and she pulls them down as her lips kiss right above the fabric as it’s getting dragged away. Your breath hitches in anticipation as she flings the fabric to meet your dress on the floor.
“Let me take this off, at least.” Your fingers fiddle with the buttons on her top and begin to undo them. Her eyes gaze at yours as you look up at her.
“You look so good under me, baby.” Her voice lowers almost to the point where you can’t hear her. She shrugs off her top and steps out of her pants, so she is only in her underwear. The palms of her hands meet the inner of your thighs, spreading them so she can get a better look. “You’re soaking wet. Did I do this to you?”
You nod your head with a whine, wanting the blonde to do something to relieve your needs.
“Words, doll.”
“Yes, yes, you did this to me, and I need you to do something about it. Please.”
She chuckles at your desperation and kisses your stomach, then your thighs, and finally the place you need her the most. Her tongue draws a line up your slit before sucking on your clit. Your hips buck subconsciously, but Leah puts an end to it when her hands reach your waist and force you down onto the bed. You bite your lip so you don’t make a sound. This makes the blonde stop and raise her head.
“Don’t bite your lip. I want to hear exactly how I make you feel.” She states seductively, returning to her position, lapping up your arousal, and sucking on your bud. The sound of your moans bouncing off the walls, along with music from the living room, sparks the girl up more. Your hand digs into her hair, and your hips start to rock against her face when she moves faster, allowing the buildup in the pit of your stomach to get bigger. Your moans become more frequent and a little louder, showing Leah that you’re close. She pulls away for a split second to whisper, “Cum for me, doll.”
Your back arches further and further off the bed the closer you get; eventually, the coil snaps, making your body shutter and muscles tense, allowing your body to return to its first resting position. Leah’s tongue slowly continues to place soft licks, helping you get all the way through your orgasm. Your hand makes its way to her cheek and urges her to move up by you. Her chin glistens in your arousal, and she drags her thumb over it to wipe it off, then places her thumb in her mouth.
“You taste so sweet.” Your arms wrap around her neck to pull her down and kiss her. As her tongue makes its way into your mouth, you can taste the mixture of alcohol and you.
Right away, her fingertips drag down your stomach and then down to your heat. Testing the waters, she rubs her fingers over your clit which causes your legs to twitch since you’re still a little sensitive.
“Are you going to continue being my good girl?”
“Yes.”
Her smirk widens at your obedience, and as a reward, her fingers dip into your dripping hole, making you gasp at the sensation. Without warning, she plunges two digits into you, chuckling at your whimpers and moans. Her lips make their way back to yours, swallowing all of your little noises.
After a minute or two, her fingers brush against your g-spot and her lips start sucking on your pulse point, leaving a hickey. Your moans grow louder at the repeating strokes that hit your spot perfectly. Compared to your orgasm, this one feels way more intense.
“I can feel you tighten around my fingers, darling. You’re already gonna cum again?”
This time you can’t respond; you’re too breathless, and the whines spilling out of your mouth constantly don’t give you any time to answer her. Your vision becomes spotty, and you feel wetness covering the insides of your thighs. Your orgasm crashes over you but lasts longer than anyone you’ve ever had.
Without your knowledge, Leah pulls away and looks at you with her jaw hanging open. When you finally come down from your high, you meet her gaze with a questioning look. A smug smile takes over her features, which makes you even more confused.
“You soaked the sheets and my arm, doll.”
Your eyes trail down, and you see a big wet patch on the mattress and the blonde's arm soaked. Feeling embarrassed, you cover your face with your hands and fall back against the pillows with a groan. Leah wipes her arm against the sheet you will definitely be washing later.
Leah lays beside you and grabs your wrists to move them from your face. She leans over and pecks your forehead, your chin, both of your cheeks, your nose, and then finally, your lips. Her eyes light up when she sees you smile at her gesture. You’re both lying together for a few minutes before Leah stands up and grabs her shirt.
“What are you doing?” You sit up with your arms holding you.
“Uhh, I’ve got a couple of errands to run in the morning, so I’ve gotta get home.” Her fingers work at one of the buttons of her shirt, and she keeps her head down.
You sigh before saying, “I know you have a reputation for sleeping around, and I know it’s a mess, but you don’t need to hide. You can let me in. So you can either get into bed at the count of three or you can walk out that door and never talk to me again.”
Her fingers stop buttoning up her shirt, and she finally looks at you.
“Three.”
Still in the same spot.
“Two.”
Only moves one step forward.
“One.” You pull your comforter down, patting the spot she was previously in. She quickly takes her top off and lays down next to you. You turn to your side so Leah can wrap her arms around you. Her nose nuzzles into your neck, and she hears you mumble, “I knew you had a soft side.”
The taller girl realizes she enjoys having a body next to her, especially one she’s grown to really like, but then it hits her. She’s never done this. This isn’t who she is. Multiple thoughts race through her head while you sleep soundly right next to her. She slowly removes her arms, making sure you don’t stir, which, luckily for her, you don’t. Quickly, she stands up, gets dressed, and rushes out the door.
The sun peeks through the curtains, waking you up. You smile and turn around, only to be met with empty sheets. Sitting up, you look on the ground and see all of Leah’s clothes missing.
The feeling of embarrassment floods your veins as you pull your blanket up to cover your chest. You feel stupid that you actually believed Leah would fall for you. You feel used, as if she just took you on those dates just to have sex with you. And you feel ashamed. Ashamed, you didn’t listen to any of the warnings thrown your way by your best friends.
Tears begin to trail down your cheeks before you even realize it. I guess you’re just not lovable for the Leah Williamson.
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bitchy-craft · 1 year
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What Crystal Describes Your Future Spouse | Pick A Pile
Hello and welcome to this Pick A Pile! In here you'll find out what crystal describes your future spouse. I hope you guys enjoy and find this useful. Do make sure to leave comments down below on your experience! I do want to remind you all that this is a General Pick A Pile which means this is for a lot of people; therefore keep what resonates and leave what doesn't.
Masterlist > Questions > Paid Readings
Pick A Pile!
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Pile 1:
The Amethyst is a violet to purple quartz crystal with a transparent to translucent appearance. It often forms in geodes or clusters and can have variations in colour intensity. This crystal is associated with spiritual awareness, inner peace, and transformation. It is believed to enhance intuition, promote clarity of thought, and aid in meditation and spiritual growth. Amethyst is commonly used for meditation, promoting restful sleep, and fostering a calm and balanced mind. It is also considered a protective crystal against negative energies.
Your future spouse, who resonates with amethyst tends to be introspective, intuitive, and have a deep spiritual connection. They seek balance in their lives and have a strong desire to understand their inner selves.
Pile 2:
Citrine is a yellow to golden-brown variety of quartz. It often has a bright and vibrant colour, resembling sunlight or honey. This crystal is associated with abundance, creativity, and positive energy. It is believed to enhance self-confidence, attract success, and promote a joyful and optimistic outlook. Citrine is used to manifest abundance and prosperity, boost confidence, and dispel negative energies. It's also considered a stone of motivation and clarity.
Your future spouse, who resonates with citrine is an outgoing, cheerful, and motivated individual. They have a natural sense of enthusiasm and a knack for turning challenges into opportunities. They radiate positivity and are drawn to creative pursuits.
Pile 3:
Rose quartz is a pale pink to rosy-coloured crystal with a translucent appearance. It's often found in various shapes, from tumbled stones to carved figurines. This crystal is known as the stone of unconditional love and compassion. It is associated with healing emotional wounds, fostering self-love, and nurturing relationships. Rose quartz is used to promote love and harmony in relationships, encourage self-care, and heal emotional trauma. It's also believed to open the heart chakra.
Your future spouse, who resonates with rose quartz is gentle, empathetic, and nurturing. They have a natural ability to create and maintain meaningful connections and often prioritize the well-being of others. They are also in touch with their emotions and seek to bring healing to themselves and those around them.
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primaviva · 1 year
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WASTED SUMMERS
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PAIRINGS: gwen stacy x fem!reader, gwen stacy x miles morales (platonic)
SYNOPSIS: one minute you were fighting the vulture, the next you were caring for gwen stacy. she hated you at first and thought you were just another person taking pity on her. as the two of you became closer, gwen realized she needed you. maybe as a friend or maybe as something more. but that all changed once miles came back. two months later, you were dropped. just like that. was everything between you two just all in your head? she said it herself, you were just a waste of time.
WARNINGS: heavy angst, mentions of blood / injury, misunderstandings trope, gwen bein in her own world as always, jealousy and big arguments, as well as super long and not proof read ?? that’s all
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as the sun stretched its golden rays across the landscape, a gentle warmth enveloped the city, signaling the arrival of summer.
being a normal kid was never in the cards for you. after all, you possessed incredible spider powers that set you apart from the rest. you longed for someone who could relate to the exhilaration, the struggles, and the responsibility that came with being spiderwoman. while others could confide in friends or family about their daily lives, you carried the weight of your powers silently, unable to share the truth with anyone.
but then, everything changed when the events of kingpin's collider unfolded. in that moment, you crossed paths with numerous individuals who were just like you spider people from their own dimensions. finally, you found people who shared your struggles, faced similar challenges, and could truly empathize with what you were going through.
however, you didn't spend much time with them. being new to the mantle, you were still coming out of your shell a little. you still made bonds back then, don’t get yourself wrong. those relationships just weren’t as deep as others like miles and peter or miles and… her.
but things were different now. since then, you've undergone such a transformation.
seeing all of them made you feel normal, not just that you found people who understood you completely. it brought you back to the feeling of when you were a regular teen girl with friends to always hang out with and little crushes. there was a sense of normalcy.
you thought you’d never see them again, until you did.
some time ago, a spider-man named miguel o'hara from a different dimension came forward, boldly claiming his identity as a fellow spider-powered hero. he had taken it upon himself to establish a spider society and extended an invitation for you to join. according to him, he sought someone level-headed like you, someone who could contribute in a meaningful way to the group. at first, it was strange how miguel seemed to possess an uncanny knowledge of your existence. he was well-versed in the details of your encounters, from the kingpin's collider incident to significant moments in your reality that held personal significance for you. he skillfully employed this knowledge to persuade you to make a decision.
despite your initial skepticism, you ultimately said yes, and that marked the beginning of a profound journey. it was through this experience that you delved into the enigmatic concept of the “arachno-humanoid-polymultiverse.” the intricate web of realities, the existence of canon events, and the watches that held the power of multiversal travel. it was akin to schrödinger's cat, where the multiverse and quantum mechanics transformed into theories or knowledge.
but miguel had this factual certainty in his beliefs, and his conviction remained steadfast. you couldn't shake the feeling that there were inherent flaws in his belief system. despite your reservations though, you decided to join. after all, there was no harm in aiding these "anomalies" in finding their way back to their rightful dimensions, was there?
and so, within this newfound spider society, you found yourself reunited with familiar faces like peter, peni, and even new people like hobie, london's very own spider-man.
you thought it was over and your life would continue as normal until miguel called you in.
“(y/n)? get to hq right now, i need you to prepare for another anomaly to be sent back!” he yelled through your watch suddenly.
he sounded out of breath, almost like he was mid running while calling you.
“señor o’hara? the hell, what work are you putting in right now? it sounds like you’re screaming at me from underwater,” you teased as you began to open a portal back to the society.
“now’s not the time for your jokes,” he groaned and you could visibly imagine the look of annoyance on his face. “jessica and i are on our way back with the vulture.”
before you could respond, he abruptly ended the call, leaving you hanging. a few minutes passed as you readied a secure enclosure using the advanced technology provided by the spider society. the vulture, regardless of the variant, always had a penchant for escape, making it crucial to have proper containment measures in place.
lost in your thoughts, you were startled when an imposing figure, resembling an ancient bird, materialized before you, bound in handcuffs. miguel, handling the vulture, swiftly placed him in the designated "jail" alongside the other detained anomalies
"thanks," he whispered, acknowledging your assistance.
you hummed in response as you leaned against the wall. “where’s jessica?” you asked.
miguel muttered under his breath, "with the new recruit," prompting you to raise an eyebrow.
"a new recruit? funny how you conveniently forgot to mention that while you were harassing me over a watch," you remarked playfully.
"i didn't want to," miguel retorted, turning to face you. "but jessica convinced me."
nodding, you stepped closer to him, ready to delve deeper into the matter. however, before you could continue, heavy footsteps approached, and your eyes widened in disbelief.
it was gwen.
"gwen?" you uttered, your voice barely above a whisper, your shock evident.
her eyes widened, but she remained silent and looked down at her feet.
jessica shot you a meaningful look, silently conveying that gwen had been through something difficult and needed space. respecting her unspoken request, you held your questions, allowing gwen the time she needed to process whatever she had experienced.
that was the most that could be said about your initial encounter. you didn't blame her at first for preferring to be alone herself. jessica gave you a brief summary of what happened when her father learned of her identity. she shared no specifics, but all she said was that it went horribly wrong and that she would be staying with the spider society for the time being. it was up till miguel gave her a watch and assigned you the job of assisting her in settling in to make it official.
with gentle care, you grasped gwen's wrist, making sure the watch fit properly on her arm.
“i know miguel probably told you a bunch of word vomit about the watch already,” you began, releasing your grip on the timepiece and gesturing to the buttons. “but just so you don’t get confused, here is the button that activates the watch, while the one below deactivates it. and the actual purpose of the watch, these dials, they're for inputting the assigned dimension number when you're traveling."
gwen responded with a soft hum, her gaze avoiding yours as you looked up. it was evident that she still struggled to find her place, feeling like an outsider. gwen noticed you staring up at her and redirected her focus to you, raising an eyebrow in response.
“are you okay?” you asked her.
she almost rolled her eyes a little. she didn’t want you to take pity on her, nor did she want the attention.
“do i look okay?” she snapped back.
gwen just wanted to be alone, wishing she could retreat into a sanctuary where she could escape the guilt and betrayal that weighed heavily on her heart.
you exhaled a sigh, understanding her irritation and how she desired to keep to herself for now.
“sorry for wanting to know if you were doing better,” you replied with a bit of an attitude. “i know this can be a lot, and i heard about what happened with your dad… just know it’s not your fault. we can talk whenever, if you want to. but i get it, right now you just want space.”
with those words, you turned to walk away, intending to respect gwen's wishes. but before you could step away completely, gwen reached out, gripping your shoulder and gently turning you around. in an unexpected moment, she embraced you tightly.
as you felt a slight dampness on your neck, you realized that gwen's tears were streaming down her cheeks.
“thanks,” her voice came out muffled against your suit. “i’m sorry for acting like a jerk. it really is nice to see you, (y/n). i just have so much going on in my head right now. it’s nice to know that someone understands.”
“you don’t have to thank me for this,” you assured her in a gentle whisper as you rubbed circles into her back.
reluctantly, gwen pulled away, swiftly wiping beneath her eyes and revealing a toothy grin, her endearing gap peeking through.
you swear you felt your heart skip a beat.
it was a little rocky at first. gwen struggled to fully accept your unwavering support, leading to occasional conflicts and disagreements. however, as time passed, she gradually eased into the dynamic between you, recognizing that you genuinely cared for her. with each passing day, gwen's guard began to lower, and she started sharing what happened with her dad, details about her life like how she played with her band, the mary janes, and more.
gradually, gwen found herself seeking refuge at your place more often, drawn to the comfort and solace it provided. drawn to you, even. it’s to the point where she doesn’t even crash at hobie’s anymore. the space you two shared became a sanctuary for gwen, where she could truly be herself, unburdened by the weight of her past.
you two had become close friends, best friends even, but there was something that unsettled your mind about it. whenever she was around, a mixture of nervousness and excitement coursed through your veins as the blood in your body rushed to your cheeks. her presence had a way of making you feel giddy, and you found a joy you weren’t used to in her company.
however, everything began to change when miles returned.
the incident involving the spot was an utter mess. to make a stupid story short, what miguel had defined as an anomaly turned out to be untrue. the canon events were not set in stone but rather common traits among the spider people from different dimensions. the notion of a dimension being "destroyed" was debunked, as dimensions lost in the spiderverse would reset and begin anew beyond the confines of the connected spider universes.
at first, her visit to his universe surprised you. instead of tracking down the spot, she chose to spend time with him, even meeting his parents. you knew they had a deep connection from the first time they met, but witnessing their reunion made it apparent just how close they had become. the way she became so engrossed in him made you feel a pang of jealousy, seeing how effortlessly he captured her attention.
you realized that you hadn't spent much time with her lately, which only heightened your anticipation for the day you had planned to hang out.
again, it was summer. this was the time to hang out with friends, be out late, just do things just for the memories.
as you swung home on your webs you smiled as you took in the world around you.
the sunset blanketed the streets as skyscrapers stood tall, casting long shadows that provided a respite from the heat. bodies of water nearby offered a refreshing breeze to those caught outside in their sweat. the city's iconic landmarks, from the statue of liberty to the empire state building, glisten in the sunlight, their grandeur amplified by the orange and purple skies above. the aroma of street vendors' delicacies fills the air as you jump from building to building, enticing passersby with the sizzle of hot dogs, the tangy zest of pretzels, and the sweet smell of snow cones being sold around the corner. the laughter of children on playgrounds, the strumming of guitars by buskers, and the rhythmic beat of joggers' footsteps became music to your ears.
a broad smile illuminated your face as your eyes fell upon your beloved apartment. with a nimble grace, you hopped onto the fire escape, effortlessly maneuvering your way through the open window. there, on your bed, was gwen, nestled comfortably amidst the pillows. she had been staying at your place for the week, adding an extra touch of warmth to the familiar surroundings.
"whatchu doing, hobo?" you playfully quipped, unable to contain your amusement as you made your presence known.
gwen responded with a good-natured smirk, her eyes sparkling with a hint of mischief. "well, hello to you too," she replied, the faintest resistance to rolling her eyes evident in her tone.
stepping further into the room, you shrugged off your bag and placed it gently on your desk, allowing the weight of the day to slip away. the room seemed to exhale, embracing you in its familiar embrace.
curiosity sparked in your eyes as you observed gwen's relaxed state. "so, what did you do today?" you inquired, a genuine interest in her activities evident in your voice.
gwen shifted, propping herself up against the pillows, a contented smile gracing her lips. "well, miguel called me in a few times, but eventually i wasn't needed anymore, so i decided to spend the rest of the day here," she explained. "and you? how about you, my friendly neighborhood web-slinger? did you have any exciting adventures?"
the playful smile that adorned gwen's face mirrored your own, both of you relishing in the simplicity of these moments where you could just be two friends engaged in casual conversation.
"yeah, i did some stuff, but it seems villains nowadays want to take summer vacations," you joked, playfully stepping away from your desk and making your way toward her. "and now i have to change my clothes, so uh, leave," you said, adopting a faux-stern tone while placing your hands on your hips.
despite the fact that there was a perfectly fine extra room available, gwen had a penchant for invading your space, making your room her own. it had reached a point where it was hard to find your own belongings amidst her things, but you didn't mind. you cherished her company, understanding that she was still adjusting to living with her dad again, even after he had discovered her secret and grown to accept her.
"no thanks, i'm too comfortable now," gwen declared, shaking her head with a determined expression, refusing to budge.
you arched an eyebrow, your brow furrowing slightly as you licked your teeth. "fine."
turning away from gwen, you began to remove your shoes, followed by your gloves, setting them aside as you prepared to change.
as gwen noticed your actions, confusion flickered across her features, causing her to tilt her head slightly. "wait a minute, what are you doing?" she asked, raising her eyebrows curiously.
"well, i did say i was gonna change, but since you're too lazy to leave my bed," you replied, extending your arm behind you, "this is me, changing."
with a firm grip on the zipper, you slowly pulled it downward, revealing your bare back as you opened the closet door and stepped behind it, concealing your figure from gwen's gaze.
gwen scoffed at your teasing remark, her cheeks flushing with a hint of embarrassment. "hey, just because i enjoy some relaxation time doesn't mean i'm lazy," she protested, attempting to maintain her composure but failing in the face of your playful banter.
"better not peek or i'li put you out on the street," you warned.
"oh, please i’d like to see you try," gwen jested. she knew you were teasing, and she couldn't help but play along with you. "you wouldn't be able to, i'm too charming."
as you disappeared behind the closed closet doors, gwen's curiosity got the better of her, though she tried her best not to reveal her intrigue. unbeknownst to you, she leaned to the side, attempting to catch a glimpse of your face through the crack in the doors.
"gwen," you called out, your tone stern.
her reverie shattered, gwen snapped back to reality, quickly retreating to her corner.
"ehmm, i'm not peeking," she mumbled, her face flushing a deeper shade of red. her gaze remained fixed on the small opening between the closet doors, but she did her best to prevent you from noticing.
"it's my superhero instinct to be super observant and all that," gwen explained, trying to justify her actions. "nothing sketchy going on here.”
with a piercing glare, you continued to observe her.
"o-okay, fine, i'm sorry," she conceded, her voice softening as she averted her gaze.
meanwhile, you proceeded to slide your spider suit down to your feet, kicking it off onto the floor before selecting a fresh set of clothes to wear. closing the closet doors, you turned to face gwen.
"i hate you," you retorted, referencing her playful intrusion during your changing process.
gwen rolled her eyes, her mischievous nature still present as she couldn't resist a bit of teasing.
"i love you too," she responded, offering a sly wink and a smirk. "don't worry, i didn't see anything. just your face. it was still a nice view."
her comment caught you off guard, widening your eyes and leaving your mouth slightly agape.
"a nice view?" you repeated, more as a question, deciding to switch the topic. "you're not even the superhero of this earth, but yeah, i'm totally your damsel in distress. definitely not like i have powers of my own or anything," you replied sarcastically.
gwen's mischievous expression persisted as she focused her gaze on you, her eyes trailing over your body.
"yeah, well, i'm always spider-woman, fulfilling my duties as a superhero, which includes making sure to keep everyone safe, including a really pretty damsel like yourself," gwen responded with a playful tone.
you felt a warmth spread across your cheeks at her compliment, quickly turning away to hide your reaction. "so, gonna get ready now or what?" you asked, trying to steer the conversation in a different direction.
gwen raised an eyebrow, a hint of confusion in her expression. "ready for... what?" she asked.
"you literally don't remember us saying we were gonna go bowling?" you replied, slightly exasperated.
"what are you talking about? and doesn't that place open at 6?" gwen questioned, feeling she had missed a chapter on what was going on.
"gwen, it's 6:15," you informed her, hoping it would jog her memory.
her eyes widened in realization, and she quickly sprang into action, putting on her shoes and searching for her jacket.
"shit, shit, shit. i made plans with miles, i'm gonna be late. he's probably mad right now that i haven't shown up yet!" gwen spoke frantically, her mind racing and forgetting about your prior arrangement.
you furrowed your brow in annoyance and a tinge of anger. "gwen, what do you mean you made plans with miles when you said we'd do something today?" you blurted out, feeling a sense of disappointment.
gwen looked at you with a blank expression, scratching her head as she tried to recall what you were talking about. suddenly, her eyes widened in surprise as she realized her mistake.
"bowling? oh god, i completely forgot," gwen exclaimed, still searching for her jacket and watch. "my time management is so bad."
you crossed your arms as you felt your lips pout, feeling a mix of frustration and hurt. "gwen, you always do this. you cancel plans on me, and we don't even hang out anymore besides when you're using my bed to sleep. it's always miles this and miles that. it's getting tiring," you expressed with a bitter tone.
gwen's expression shifted to one of hurt, and she fell silent for a moment, taking in your words.
"hey, i'm sorry... i know it might seem like i don't care when i cancel on you, but that's not true," she said, her voice softening. "i just get caught up in all my superhero stuff... miles and i are really close, you know? like a team."
"yeah, a team," you repeated, pressing your tongue against your cheek as you handed gwen her jacket. "then don't keep him waiting because of me," you said, walking towards the bedroom door.
"hey, hey, hey, take a chill pill," gwen retorted, her voice reflecting her own irritation. "i didn't cancel our plans on purpose. yes, it's true that i do spend more time with miles than you. but he's the reason why i'm able to be the hero that i am today! you should be grateful for that."
gwen turned around, facing you directly, her expression firm and strict. "and by the way, you're the one who always volunteers to let me stay at your place. don't act like a victim now."
you looked at her, a mix of shock and anger coursing through you. "gwen, i am not the one," you declared, pointing a finger up at her. "so trust me when i say you don't want to start with me."
gwen's anger flared, but she made an effort to regain her composure, even though it was clear she was on the verge of losing it.
"hey, don't point your finger at me like that!" she snapped back.
you could see how agitated she is. her lips were slightly curled and her chin jutted out as she narrowed her eyes.
"really? is this how this conversation is going to go?" gwen asked in a hushed tone, her expression shifting to a more saddened one. "you know what? fine. i'll go."
"yeah, i think you should," you agreed, watching her dial the numbers 1610 to miles' dimension.
gwen looked at you as if she wanted to argue further but realized it wasn't worth it. she swiftly opened the portal, ready to leave.
she gave you a sharp nod. "okay then, if that's how you want it," gwen stated, keeping her tone as neutral as possible, although it was evident you had affected her.
after a few seconds of tense silence, she stepped through the portal, disappearing from the room. maybe spending some time in a different dimension with miles would help clear her mind.
hours had passed since your fight with gwen, and the tension still lingered in the air. restlessness had settled deep within you, making it impossible to find solace in sleep. as the late hour ticked away, hunger gnawed at your stomach, prompting you to abandon the confines of your covers. retrieving your phone to check the time, you couldn't help but be shocked by the display.
"ay, is it really only 12?" you asked yourself, shocked as it felt like you have been losing the wrestling match of sleep for hours.
making your way to the kitchen, you sought refuge in the act of preparing a mug brownie, a familiar and comforting midnight snack. the process was quick, taking only a couple of minutes and requiring simple ingredients like brown sugar and the usual components of a microwaveable treat.
a sigh escaped your lips as you reached for the brown sugar from the cabinet, your mind drifting into introspection. the summer had been a tumultuous mix of highs and lows, with moments where tears seemed to dominate your days. juggling the responsibilities of the spider society and your personal commitments has left little time for the company of friends, leaving you longing for more meaningful connections. and when you did manage to spend time with friends, it often revolved around the spider society, missions, and the likes of hobie, margo, and gwen.
"gwen," you murmured aloud, her name rolling off your tongue as thoughts of her flooded your mind.
she had an undeniable hold on you, like a game of cat and mouse that seemed to stretch throughout the entire summer. she consumed your time, yet offered so little in return. it felt as if she knew you better than anyone, even yourself, effortlessly providing comfort and care. however, those moments of intimacy were fleeting, slipping through your fingers before you could fully grasp them.
the idyllic picture of the perfect summer played out in your mind—a montage of beach days, rooftop nights, and the presence of everyone you longed to be with. while you did experience some of those moments, basking in the warmth of the sun with friends, engaging in sleepovers filled with hobie's terrifying tales borrowed from reddit, and swinging across rooftops while gazing at the stars, something essential felt missing. and even now, that void remains unfilled.
that something is gwen, you now realize.
despite her being so close, she always seemed just out of reach. whether it was strolling along the shoreline with miles at the beach, sharing secretive giggles under the covers while the rest of the group debated movie choices during sleepovers, or simply being in the same space, gwen was always by miles' side.
you had tried to stand by her, to be there for her and enjoy her presence, but it seemed as though you could never make it stick.
the sudden eruption of vibrant colors and a jarring electric sound snapped you out of your reverie. your heart skipped a beat as you recognized it for what it was—a portal. and you knew exactly who had just arrived.
preparing yourself mentally, you squeezed your eyes shut, stirring the mixture with a spoon before hastily popping it into the microwave.
when gwen appeared in the kitchen, she looked a bit tired and drained, even though a little excitement was still radiating from her body. she had her hands in her pockets as she walked into the kitchen, her usual confident and cheeky attitude nowhere to be seen. gwen was a bit nervous, not knowing what to expect. as soon as her eyes caught a glimpse of you, she froze in her tracks, her eyes getting wide as they darted all over you, looking for any sign that you were mad at her. it took a while for her to summon the courage to break the silence.
"i um- i'm sorry," gwen finally began, her voice soft, her gaze lowered. even in the dim light, you could discern the sincerity in her eyes. "what i said earlier and how i treated you… i shouldn't have."
rather than responding verbally, you nodded, acknowledging her apology while allowing a moment of silence to pass. the sound of her footsteps growing louder indicated her gradual approach.
"what are you doing up so late?" she inquired, raising an eyebrow. "it's almost midnight. shouldn't you be getting some rest?"
a sigh escaped your lips, her presence a stark reminder of the reason behind your sleeplessness.
"couldn't sleep, so i'm having a snack," you replied in a monotone voice.
gwen tilted her head to the side. "okay, i'ii take that at face value for now," she replied, a small smirk appearing on her face before quickly fading as she walked closer to you.
after a long pause, she finally spoke up. "look. i know that we had a bit of an argument earlier," she stated, voice barley above a whisper. "i just want you to know that i didn't mean anything i said,'' gwen added.
"didn't mean it, or didn't mean to say it?" you questioned, finally turning around to face her directly, allowing her to see your expression instead of just your back.
"both," gwen muttered, feeling like she was digging herself a deeper hole with each word.
you remained silent, giving her the space to continue.
"look, i'm sorry, okay?" she implored, raising her eyebrows. her tone sounded desperate, as if she was really hoping that you would just forgive her. but she knew that you weren't the type to just forget what had happened.
"but i... i'm still your friend. whether you like it or not," she added with a faint chuckle.
arching an eyebrow at her hesitant delivery, you maintained your silence, allowing her to take the lead in the conversation.
"it's not like i was on a date with him or anything like that. i just forgot about our plans. i didn't mean to prioritize him over you. it's just- i owe him a lot. he's special to me, you know," gwen explained, her voice tinged with a touch of regret as you turned away again, biting your lip.
jealousy churned within you as her words filled the air, the mention of miles leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. it felt as though your heart twisted with each passing moment.
"i'm really, really sorry. i promise it won't happen again, okay?" gwen pleaded, her voice dripping with sincerity, even as you maintained your facade of indifference.
"i know how you see miles, you don't have to explain your feelings to me. even if it was a date, why would i care? hope you two had fun," you assured her, disregarding her promise not to bail on you again.
gwen looked genuinely upset when you turned your back to her and shrugged her words away. she didn't want you to feel like you'd been put on the shelf in favor of miles.
"i had fun, yeah," she eventually replied, not sure if you were genuinely interested in hearing about her time with miles.
gwen really did want to make up with you, but to her, it seemed like you were still angry.
you emitted a small hum in response, and the microwave dinged, indicating that the mug brownie was ready.
she took another step closer and placed her hands on your shoulders, trying to catch your attention. her expression was filled with concern.
"hey, is something wrong?" gwen asked you, her eyebrows moving up together to form a small frown.
for at least a few minutes, there was no sound; the only thing breaking the silence was the occasional gust of wind coming from the open window and the sound of you opening the utensil draw for a spoon and eating away at your dessert.
“nothing, i feel fine,” you replied dryly.
the silence and your straight face didn't exactly give gwen anything to work with. it was obvious that something was wrong, but you refused to admit it. you were a very stubborn person, after all.
"you're so full of crap, you know that, right?" gwen replied, turning you around so that you had to look at her.
she wasn't mad at you. well, she certainly was a couple of hours ago, but right at this moment, she was mostly worried about you. you seemed so distant, almost as if you wanted her to leave.
she tightened her grip on your shoulders, not trying to hurt you, but to make it clear that she meant what she was saying. even though your face remained expressionless, gwen could read you like a book. she didn't let go of your shoulders and just kept looking at you, the concern on her face growing.
you gasped, taken aback by how she turned you around
"gwen, literally what do you want me to say to you?" you asked, annoyance seeping into your voice.
"you can say the truth, for starters," she stated.
"well to start, for you to say i'm the one full of crap is hilarious. i said i feel fine, now let go of me," you added, attempting but failing to escape her firm grasp.
gwen felt her expression changing as she heard your words, the look of worry slowly turning into one of annoyance. a part of her wanted to snap back at you, but she remained silent once again.
"no," gwen replied, "no, you're not fine, and you know it."
she took a deep breath and looked straight into your eyes, trying to make you listen to her.
"miles means a lot to me— i'd even say he's one of the most important people in my life. but that doesn't mean that he comes before my other friends, and you're definitely one of my friends. i shouldn't have canceled our plans, but..."
gwen looked at you to study your face for any signs that you were hearing her out, but all she was left with was this grim and dark look in your eye as your lips faintly quivered.
she shook her head. "you know what? just forget it. i don't want to keep talking about it. i'ii leave you alone now."
"gwen, i'm not doing this with you right now. goodnight," you declared, placing the cup aside and attempting to walk past her.
gwen was stunned for a few moments as she looked at you, visibly disappointed. for a moment, she was about to protest, but then changed her mind.
she wanted to say something, but she realized that you didn't want to hear it anyway. her grip slowly tightened as her eyes narrowed, but then a deep breath escaped her and she let go.
gwen watched as you left the room, her face filled with confusion and slight frustration. but after everything that had happened tonight, she decided that it was best to leave you alone instead of forcing a conversation you clearly didn't want to have right now.
you woke up feeling a bit hazy after the events of the previous night. as the sun peeked through your curtains, momentarily blinding you, you blinked your eyes a few times to adjust. the silence in the house felt unsettling as you sat up, trying to shake off the remnants of sleep.
making your way through the hallway, you treaded lightly, not wanting to disturb anyone in the house. you headed towards the guest bedroom, hoping to find gwen there. opening the door, you called out her name, but the room was empty. not only was she not in bed, but her belongings were also gone.
a sense of disappointment washed over you as you closed the door, realizing that gwen had left. uncertain of the reason behind her sudden departure, you let out a deep breath and decided to focus on your responsibilities as a hero. it was time to suit up and check on the city before heading to headquarters for the day.
that's exactly what you did. you patrolled the streets of new york, swinging through the familiar cityscape, keeping an eye out for any signs of trouble. along the way, you checked in with miguel to see if he needed any assistance. however, he seemed preoccupied with his own tasks, so you respectfully left him to his work.
feeling the need for some solitude, you made your way to the top of the spider society structure—a tall, unique building that provided a secluded spot away from prying eyes. as you stood at the pinnacle, overlooking the sprawling city, a sense of calm washed over you. the blue skies and gentle breeze offered a momentary respite from the chaos of your thoughts.
using your web-slingers, you effortlessly stuck to the side of the building, skillfully weaving a silk hammock for yourself. nestling into the cozy cocoon, you took a deep breath, savoring the natural scents that filled the air. the peacefulness of the moment enveloped you as you gazed at the breathtaking landscape before you, allowing yourself to unwind and find solace in the stillness.
“(y/n), yer out here?” you heard a voice call out for you.
you let out an audible groan. of course, hobie of all people would come looking for you.
“imma take that as a yes,” he yelled out, swinging down and landing on the hammock next to me with ease.
"oh, hey hobie, what's good?" you asked him, your voice weak and strained from everything going on.
there was so much on your mind it made your brain feel like mush and you didn't know what to do. you just wanted to bury myself in your bed back home and rot away until the day reset. but you knew that wasn’t the healthy thing to do.
hobie’s brow raised at your sad expression, his smirk disappearing. "i dunno if anything is good. you don't look too hot," he commented. his voice was surprisingly calm and caring, contrasting the punk rocker persona. "are ya alright, bruv?"
you looked at him, leaning your head on your palm as you gave him a soft smile.
“it’s… really nothing,” you whispered.
it's clear you're not being entirely honest with him. in fact, you can see his eyes narrow and his forehead crease, as if he can read right through your response like a book.
“i don’t buy it,” hobie sighs as he puts his hands in his pocket and leans back to make himself comfortable. “there's nobody around us, you can talk to me."
you contemplate confiding in him, but ultimately his infectious energy wins you over.
“well, if you really care to listen. i got into a fight with gwen and when i woke up she was gone," you explained. "but now, when i check her location she's always at miles universe or her own...i think she's crashing with him now too. and that's what she used to do with me. the thing is, i don't even hate miles but just when she mentions her name i get this feeling i cabt explain,” you confess.
"oof." hobie frowns. he hates hearing that people aren't doing too great, and it seems to bother him how you don't even know how you feel.
he could do with some insight on these subjects as well. "that's rough, mate. y'do know she's not doing that to avoid ya, right?"
you couldn’t help but let out a dry laugh.
“i honestly don’t know, and i don’t even think it matters anymore,” you admitted. “but it’s like when i’m near her, i get this warm feeling? i don’t know how to describe it. we’re best friends, well, were at this point. every time i got near her tho, she made me feel all giddy and nervous. maybe i was excited to have someone like her in my life or something.”
he looks at you with a knowing look, like he seems to have the answer.
"y're in love with her? because that kinda sounds like it to me," hobie states.
he's straight forward. no sense dancing about these things type of attitude.
"what?" you yelled out of nowhere, almost choking on your own saliva. that was the last thing you expected him to say.
“hobie, you move a lil’ too fast. love is a real strong word,” you mumble, covering your face with your hands from embarrassment.
he laughs, and nudges your shoulder a bit. "i can see it on your face, (y/n). ain't got a lotta experience myself, but you're crushing on her real hard."
you hesitantly move your hands from your face and meet his gaze.
'hey, you don't gotta deny it,” he teased, enjoying how flushed your face looked. "you like her, don'tcha?"
"i do, but we haven't talked in weeks and i'm starting to think that she likes miles," you admit. "she just sees me as a best friend that helped her through a bad time. but miles and her are the same. they have a special connection, she even said so herself to me." you sigh in defeat.
hobie can tell that you're hurting, and he doesn't want to see you so down over her. there's a moment of silence, before the guy nudges you again.
"aye, but that's all the more reason to tell her how you feel,” hobie gives his advice matter-of-factually. "tell her how you feel. if she says she likes miles, it'll be a bit awkward. but you'll be glad you got it off your chest. and if she feels the same as you, what have you got to lose?"
"okay. you're right. i don't know when tho, since we haven't talked since our fight. but if we aren't even on speaking terms… might as well say how i feel," you state, moved my his advice.
"atta girl. i believe in ya,” hobie hypes you up. "now, let's get you home cus those bags under yer eyes makin you look like a racoon. you've already had a hard week. you need a break."
you smile, about to respond until you see miles coming up from the distance as hobie gives him an inviting wave.
"hey guys! uh, miguel sent me to get you two since g- never mind actually, it’s not important. he said something about a mandatory meeting," he stated.
"mandatory? the hell's that supposed to mean?" hobie questioned, the spider-punk's tone skeptical as always.
you really wanted to go home for once and not deal with bullshit, but you might not have a choice.
“ight so i guess this is happening now,” you sulk. it isn't much of a surprise. you weren't expecting miles to be the one to walk up to you both, though, especially since miguel of all people sent him. “whatever, let’s get this over with.”
you, hobie, and miles entered the headquarters, exchanging greetings with your fellow spider people as you made your way towards the boardroom. there was a mix of anticipation and apprehension in the air as you stepped into the room, scanning the space until your gaze landed on gwen. your eyes widened involuntarily, a rush of emotions flooding over you at the sight of her. the tension between you had created a tangled web of nervousness and anxiety, leaving you unsure of how to navigate the encounter. however, before you could dwell on these feelings, miguel wasted no time and commenced the meeting, diverting your attention.
gwen, positioned in a quiet corner of the room, watched you as you entered. the moment you spotted her, she looked away, avoiding your gaze.
gwen sat across the large conference table from you. she couldn't help but notice the look on your face when you spotted her. was that relief or anxiety? sadnesses, even. perhaps it was a little bit of everything. as your eyes locked with hers, she couldn't help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, you were feeling the same as she was. she hoped she wasn't projecting her own feelings onto you, but seeing you after not talking for so long brought up some complicated emotions in her heart.
as the meeting began, her expression remained neutral, but her mind was filled with a myriad of thoughts. she was wondering what could happen after this meeting with you.
while miguel led the discussion, you tried to focus on him, but a nagging sensation tugged at the corner of your vision. your face instinctively turned towards the source, and there, you met with a familiar watercolor blue.
gwen felt a chill run down her spine as her body tensed up, realizing that you caught her staring at you. as she turned her head towards miguel, her thoughts kept wandering back to you. it was also obvious that something was bothering her, as she constantly shifted in her seat.
she was still trying to think about how to approach you after so long. the situation was incredibly awkward and tense, but all she wanted was to make things right between you both again.
however, even as her attention seemed to shift elsewhere, you couldn't resist staring back at gwen. your gaze lingered on her, studying the intricate details that made up her unique appearance—from her eyebrow piercing to her dyed pink tips and her tousled blonde hair. unafraid to acknowledge her presence, you made sure she noticed your unwavering gaze.
embarrassment flooded gwen's face as she felt your eyes locked on her from across the room. despite her attempts to steal glimpses of you, she couldn't help but feel a knot of nervousness twisting in her stomach. her cheeks flushed with warmth, and her hands anxiously fiddled with the hem of her jacket.
the magnetic pull between you both was undeniable, and gwen couldn't resist the urge to turn her head in your direction. it felt as if the air had been sucked out of the room, leaving her breathless. her body seemed to melt, her heart threatening to burst with the weight of emotions she struggled to comprehend. doubts crept into her mind, questioning whether her feelings were simply illusions, born out of a desperate desire for connection.
she tried to ignore you. tried to make herself remember all the negative things about you, and all the reasons why you two shouldn't be friends again, but it was so hard. she felt like she was back to square one, right at the start when you talked for the first time.
the constant glances and stares made gwen feel all kinds of things she couldn't quite describe. it felt as though you were engaged in a silent battle, yet at the same time, a bond between you through the unspoken language of your eyes.
as gwen's mouth grew dry, she experienced a sensation she hadn't felt in quite some time. it was a mix of nerves and excitement that made her feel like a typical teenager, caught up in the throes of uncertainty and anticipation.
she felt as if you were the only person in this room right now.
despite her attempts to ignore you and focus on miguel's words, gwen found it increasingly challenging to follow the meeting. and then, once again, she felt the weight of your gaze on her. turning her head, she realized that you had shifted your attention away from miguel, fully directing it towards her.
"(y/n), can you share with the others the observation you made the other day?" miguel's voice pierced through the air, jolting you back to the reality of the meeting. the sound of his words broke the spell, prompting you to refocus your attention on the task at hand.
gwen breathed a sigh of relief as miguel called for you to speak up, but she still couldn't take her eyes off you for even a second. she tried to listen to your speech, but it was pretty hard to focus on anything other than you.
she felt you turn your gaze away from her, but she couldn't stop herself from sneaking her eyes back towards you a moment later. your face looked so serious and professional, but at the same time, there was a spark in your eyes that she couldn't miss.
she watched as you addressed miguel with confidence and conviction, all the while feeling her heart beat faster and faster.
finally, after what felt like an eternity, the meeting came to a close, drawing collective sighs of relief from the attendees. miguel couldn't resist making a snarky comment about the length of the meeting, eliciting a tired chuckle from the group. the weight of the intense atmosphere lifted, if only momentarily, allowing for a brief respite from the emotional tension that had filled the room.
gwen waited for everyone to leave, and then approached you as you were already halfway out of the room.
'hey," she called out to you quietly, almost as if she didn't want to disturb the silence. "can i talk to you for a sec?"
you turned back from facing hobie as he gave you a knowing look. slowly, you shifted back to gwen.
“yeah, sure,” you replied dryly.
hobie let out a deep hum. “see ya both,” he told the two of you as he dropped his shoulders and strutted away.
gwen watched as hobie walked away, waiting until he was out of sight before looking back at you, her expression serious. taking a small breath, she attempted to collect her thoughts, knowing that she had so much to say but fearing the possibility of stumbling over her words once again.
"i know we haven't talked in a while which is my fault," she began, "but i want to apologize for... well, everything."
her eyes locked with yours, searching for any sign of your reaction. but before delving further, she felt the need to make one thing abundantly clear.
"i still consider you to be one of my closest friends," she uttered softly, hoping her words would reach you.
in response, you offered gwen a comforting smile, even if it didn't entirely reflect your true emotions.
"gwen, it's alright. you've already apologized, and i don't need to hear it again," you reassured her.
her smile widened at your response, yet she couldn't help but detect a subtle nuance in your tone.
"i know you don't need to hear it again," gwen replied awkwardly, unable to fully hide the excitement that was starting to creep into her voice. "but i need to say it myself. i do care about you. a lot."
"thanks," you replied, your arms welcoming her as you opened them wide. "it's alright, okay? friends?" you asked, your aura radiating a warmth to it.
yeah, you weren't completely happy about the fight or how it seemed to have no real resolution. but seeing gwen so torn up about it made you want to just reconcile as you kept hobie’s advice echoed in the back of your head. she seemed genuine in not making the same mistakes again, so what’s the harm in second chances?
a small smile graced gwen's face as she stepped forward, her arms encircling your waist as she finally felt the embrace she had long yearned for. the sensation of your skin on her fingertips and the familiar scent that enveloped her brought a sense of comfort she had sorely missed. she buried her face in your shoulder, an electric tingle coursing through her body. for some reason, this hug was different from all the ones that she shared with you in the past. maybe it was because she was aware of how she felt right now. or maybe it was because of this overwhelming feeling of just wanting to be close to you again.
"friends," she said, nodding vigorously, "friends."
a flush of warmth spread across your face as gwen's hands made contact with you—a sensation you hadn't experienced in quite some time. slowly, you pulled back from the embrace, gazing up at her with a renewed sense of excitement.
"wanna swing around?" you suggested, eager to make up for lost time and create new memories together.
gwen's response was immediate, her enthusiasm palpable. "yes, please!" she exclaimed, her eagerness shining through. the destination didn't matter as long as it was just the two of you.
a smile never left gwen's face as she replied, "yes!" her voice exuded genuine joy. "i mean, yeah, i'd love to. it's been so long!"
caught off guard by her unabashed enthusiasm, you met her gaze with a teasing look.
"did i make my answer too obvious?" she asked, her expression tinged with a hint of embarrassment.
you couldn't help but let out a loud cackle, a sound that had been absent during your time apart. god, you had missed her.
"nah, not at all. i didn't even think you wanted to come with me," you teased, a playful sparkle in your eyes.
gwen's promises had proven to be short-lived, falling far short of expectations. as the summer neared its end and the seasons began to shift, you couldn't help but notice a change in gwen's behavior. what once were hangouts with others gradually transformed into solitary encounters, until eventually, the two of you stopped hanging out altogether, once again.
sitting atop the brooklyn bridge during lunchtime, you glanced at your watch, a gift from hobie. the vendor had generously given you a hot dog on the house, but your mind wandered, and curiosity got the better of you. you decided to check gwen's location on the watch, only to discover she was on earth 1610.
"i can't catch a break at this point," you muttered to yourself, realizing she seemed to be with mikes again.
feeling a sense of boredom, you decided to check hobie's location on the watch as well. however, your brows furrowed in confusion as you noticed he, too, was on earth 1610.
sitting up abruptly, your attention was caught off guard when you saw margo and pavitr's locations aligning with earth 1610 as well. it was an unexpected revelation. before you could process it fully, a call came in from miguel.
"(y/n), report to earth 1610. an anomaly from earth 65 has materialized," he urgently explained before abruptly hanging up, leaving no time for further explanations.
without hesitation, you dialed earth 1610 and activated the portal. as you jumped through, you were instantly transported to earth 1610, only to be greeted by a scene of utter chaos. your eyes widened in shock at the sight of a massive floating head terrorizing brooklyn.
swiftly swinging through the chaos, your gaze scanned the area until you spotted miles, gwen, and margo. pavitr and hobie were engaged in assisting with citizen control.
"what the hell is going on here?" you exclaimed, addressing the bewildered trio. before they could respond, the colossal floating head turned to face the three of you. a realization hit you like a ton of bricks.
"is that... is that fucking donald trump?" you blurted out, incredulous at the sight before you.
suddenly, everything fell into place. donald trump, ironically enough, appeared to be the m.o.d.o.k. variant in gwen's universe, and somehow, he had glitched into miles' reality.
"does anyone have a plan?" you urgently asked, realizing the gravity of the situation and the need for immediate action.
you were completely right: it was, indeed, donald trump. but he looked nothing like the president from your timeline. he looked... deformed.
“i think i know a way to stop him!" gwen shouted, immediately swinging over to miles.
you couldn't help but feel baffled and frustrated by gwen's apparent disregard for your presence. as she went off searching for miles, you swung after her, annoyed by her dismissive attitude.
"hey, don't you want to stick with the rest of us?" you asked, irritation lacing your words. you had lost sight of miles and margo while evading m.o.d.o.k.'s attacks, and it was crucial to regroup.
"oh, sorry!" gwen quickly replied, finally noticing that you had followed her. her focus had been solely on finding miles and stopping the giant-headed donald trump monstrosity.
after locating miles and catching his attention, gwen wasted no time in sharing her plan, hoping it would be enough to neutralize the colossal floating threat.
"we need to find the panel at the back of his armor and shut it down," she explained, her voice resolute.
you walked over to join them, your annoyance evident as you stomped over. "gwen, you can't be serious with that plan," you told her, hands on your hips. "it's way too risky, even for you. look at what's happening around here!"
gwen looked at you, defending her plan while meeting your gaze. "what else do we have?" she retorted. "the longer we take, the more damage trump might do to this universe! we have to act fast, and we can't afford to waste time searching for alternatives!"
though confusion flickered across miles' face, gwen had faith that he would support her plan.
"we have to do this," she asserted, her voice firm.
"gwen, listen. if you're feeling guilty about trump being here, now is not the time," you yelled in frustration. "i understand you want to help miles, but respectfully, this is the dumbest plan i've ever heard from you! it's close combat, which poses a significant risk. he's too massive and unpredictable. just look at the path of destruction he's leaving behind with his flailing legs. jumping on him could endanger innocent bystanders, including yourself!"
however, judging by the expression on gwen's face, it was clear she wasn't buying your reasoning.
"what do you expect us to do otherwise?” gwen snapped, her frustration now boiling over. "if we don't tackle this head-on, this donald trump will bring complete destruction to this earth! can't you see what's happening here?"
she gestured to the chaos surrounding them, emphasizing the dire situation.
"you have a better plan?" gwen challenged. "please, enlighten us! come up with something new, because time is running out."
before you could offer an alternative, gwen grabbed miles' arm and swung off with him. you let out an aggravated yell, following closely behind, but by the time you caught up with them, they had already set their plan in motion.
gwen quickly assessed her surroundings, searching for anything that could aid them in the battle against m.o.d.a.a.k. her gaze landed on a nearby construction crane, and she swung next to it, her mind working swiftly.
turning to miles, she spoke calmly, "can you throw me up as high as possible? with enough speed, i might be able to knock him off balance."
the sight was disheartening. miles and gwen struggled in their attempts to combat the floating head, who grew more frustrated by their relentless presence. suddenly, he started spinning frantically after miles accidentally touched a component apart from his tech suit. it sparked an idea in your mind on how to neutralize him.
however, your attention shifted as you noticed pavitr in harm's way, with the airborne m.o.d.a.a.k. hurtling towards him.
gwen swiftly recognized the imminent danger and reacted in a split second. she shot a web at m.o.d.a.a.k., specifically targeting an area of his body that wasn't shielded by his armor. the web hit its mark, sending him flying backward, crashing into a nearby building.
the building happened to be under construction, which meant there were no people inside, providing a sense of relief. yet, your eyes widened as you realized the structure couldn't withstand the weight of the massive m.o.d.a.a.k. the building crumbled and collapsed into the water.
everyone swung over to the site, landing on the debris of the fallen building.
"pavitr, you alright?" you asked, giving him a friendly shoulder nudge.
"you know it," he replied with his usual cheery demeanor.
suddenly, all eyes turned to the water as it began bubbling before abruptly stopping.
"electronics don't do too well in water, so... we should be good, right?" miles nervously asked, his voice laced with uncertainty. you turned your head to face him, giving him a blank look. "yeah, i didn't think so either," he admitted weakly.
bravely, you approached the edge where the water met the debris, peering down cautiously.
"be careful!" margo called out from behind you.
you gazed into the seemingly empty depths.
"soooo, is the big guy down or what?" hobie asked, breaking the silence as you remained silent, observing the sea.
before you could respond, an enraged m.o.d.a.a.k. emerged from the water, more aggressive and determined than ever. the battle was far from over.
"ummm... guys?" she asked, turning back to look at you, miles, hobie, margo, and pavitr. "i think we might have a problem..."
suddenly, the m.o.d.a.a.k. unleashed a violent wave of water towards the group, knocking them all down. gwen felt herself being pulled away by the force of the water, but managed to reach for one of her spider-webs and quickly shoot it towards the trump variant.
you swiftly shot out a web and grabbed onto a rusted pole nearby, pulling yourself up to a vantage point where you could assess the area.
"i've had enough of this," you muttered to yourself as you dialed margo's number on your watch.
"margo, are you hurt?" you asked, concern evident in your voice.
she chuckled dryly in response. "you think i'm gonna be taken down by an orange big baby bigot? you've got another thing coming."
you laughed, appreciating margo's indomitable spirit. "listen, i need you to see if you can compromise his software. try to hack into it and disrupt his flight control," you instructed.
"you got it," margo replied sharply, her determination palpable. you ended the call and proceeded to contact the rest of the team.
"listen up, new plan," you announced, ensuring everyone was on the line. "margo is going to hack into the software m.o.d.a. a. k. is using to control his flight. meanwhile, the rest of us will lead him to a more remote area, away from the general public. once margo can disable his flight, we'll surround him and weave a web cocoon to immobilize him. understood?"
you received agreements from everyone except gwen, who seemed lost in her thoughts. miles tapped her on the shoulder to get her attention.
"gwen, you good?" he asked, concern in his voice. "you haven't said anything this whole time."
"oh, right!" gwen replied, sounding distracted. "yeah, i'm in."
with the plan set, everyone sprang into action.
margo skillfully hacked into his software without detection. "get ready," she warned, as she began manipulating his flight controls.
m.o.d.a. a.k. started moving erratically, flying upward, downward, and in multiple directions, resembling a sickening spectacle. then suddenly, he went limp and began descending toward the ground.
"now!" you yelled, signaling the team to surround him. together, you spun thick webs that enveloped his body, forming a sturdy silk cocoon.
after securing m.o.d.a. a. k. in place, you all worked together to create a stable landing spot made entirely of spider-webs, ensuring the safety of both m.o.d.a.k. and the surrounding area.
as citizens gathered around, witnessing the strange sight, they began applauding. you and your team exchanged small waves, acknowledging their appreciation.
"thank god..." miles exclaimed, wiping the sweat off his forehead. "nice job, everyone."
you all let out tired huffs and puffs, drained from the rush of adrenaline and the physical exertion. however, the relief of the battle's conclusion was short-lived as miguel arrived in an aircraft from headquarters, seemingly to transport m.o.d.a. a. k. away. lab personnel from the spider society surrounded the scene, evacuating nearby civilians from the cocooned monstrosity in the middle of the street.
as everyone else dispersed, miles made his way to the chief of police to provide an explanation of what had transpired. meanwhile, you found yourself engaged in a conversation with miguel, providing him with a detailed report of the events. from a distance, you spotted gwen standing alone in front of the m.o.d.a.a.k. cocoon, piquing your curiosity.
after concluding your conversation with miguel, you approached gwen, calling out to get her attention. however, she didn't respond, deep in her own thoughts.
frustration welled up within you, and you couldn't hold it in any longer. "gwen, what the hell is your problem with me?" you pressed, your voice rising.
gwen was startled by your sudden outburst, turning to face you with a confused expression. "hm? what are you talking about?" she asked, her eyes narrowing as she tried to comprehend your question. "why would i have a problem with you?"
just as the argument between you and gwen began to escalate, miles returned after speaking with the chief of police, sensing the tension in the air. he decided to intervene and find out what was happening.
"what's going on?" miles asked, his voice tinged with concern.
annoyance etched across your face, you directed your frustration towards miles. "nothing's wrong, except for the fact that you and gwen were acting like damn idiots out there!" you snapped, taking a step closer to him. "do you realize how many people could've gotten hurt? do you understand the damage you caused, the buildings that were destroyed?"
your anger was evident, fueled by gwen's apparent neglect of your friendship and her persistent focus on miles. it seemed they always wanted to take matters into their own hands, disregarding any collaborative efforts. their plan had been flawed.
miles took a step back, his expression a mix of surprise and defensiveness. "look, i understand that you're mad. but we had to do whatever we could to stop that freak," he replied calmly, trying to maintain composure. "we had to act quickly, you know that. and you can call me an idiot all you want, but in the end, didn't we succeed?"
"we? we didn't do much, you know," you mocked, pointing a finger towards the trapped m.o.d.a.a.k. cocoon and then back to your face. "modak is trapped because of me! while you two were off doing whatever the hell you pleased, i came up with the plan to capture him. you needed to listen to me, but no! you two lovebirds were lost in your own world," you spat out, frustration evident in your words.
gwen felt her heart sink as your anger turned towards her, accompanied by an intense glare. you accused miles and her of being irresponsible during the battle, highlighting the near catastrophe caused by miles' actions.
"hey, wait a minute," gwen replied, her irritation growing as you hurled insults at her and miles. "miles and i did our best, okay? we helped stop that m.o.d.a.a.k., remember?" she looked you in the eye, defending both herself and miles. "why can't you ever acknowledge our efforts?"
you scoffed at gwen's comment, unable to fathom her perspective. "have you ever thought of doing stand-up comedy, gwen? because you're a literal joke if you think you helped. does provoking him to the point where he nearly caused a mini tsunami in brooklyn not ring a bell? because that shit just happened! and how the hell do you expect me to acknowledge your efforts when you don't even acknowledge me?" you shouted, your frustration boiling over.
the argument had clearly escalated from a disagreement about the mission to a more personal confrontation. miles, feeling the tension, awkwardly decided to retreat from the conversation. "um... you two... i should... i'll just... go," he mumbled, attempting to diffuse the situation and give both of you some space.
you two turned your gaze back to each other, the weight of the argument hanging heavily in the air. the tension between you was palpable as you stood there, hurt and frustrated.
"okay, fine, maybe i don't acknowledge you enough," gwen replied, her voice tinged with a mixture of defensiveness and honesty. "but that doesn't change the fact that we're friends. we're on a team, dammit. i thought that we trusted each other."
you crossed your arms, your frustration still evident. "gwen, how can i trust you when you can't even follow through on simple promises?"
gwen looked at you, her brows furrowing in confusion as she crossed her arms in return. "what promises?" she asked, genuinely puzzled.
you let out a sigh, running your hands through your hair in frustration. "this whole summer, you've barely spent any time with me. and after our fight, you said you wouldn't bail on plans anymore, but you just did it again. it feels like you don't care to make an effort or you simply don't want to see me. do you even realize how much it hurts? all i've wanted is to be around you, but every time we do, it feels like you're running away, like you're scared. i just wanted to hold your hand, to feel close to you. but instead, i feel like i've been chasing after you tryna cling to you like a fucking leech, and it's exhausting. it makes me question if it was all a waste of time. so tell me, am i a waste of time to you?" you confessed, your voice filled with a mix of anger and vulnerability.
gwen's initial defensive stance softened as your words sank in. deep down, she was scared of commitment, afraid of the responsibilities and stress that come with close relationships. but now she realized the impact her actions were having on you.
a flicker of regret crossed gwen's face as she realized the pain she had caused. "yes, you are a waste of time," she had blurted out, but the moment the words left her mouth, she wished she could take them back.
shock and hurt washed over you, your voice trembling as you struggled to process her response. "are you for real? after everything... just like that?" tears welled up in your eyes, your emotions overwhelming you.
you placed a hand over your chest, feeling your heartbeat pounding like an aggressive drum. the pain of gwen's words cut deep, and you couldn't bear it any longer. "you know what, gwen? fuck you," you said, the words laced with pain and anger, as tears streamed down your face.
gwen's stomach twisted with remorse, realizing the weight of her thoughtless words. she desperately wanted to take them back, to make things right, but she could see that you were too hurt to listen or care.
turning away, you withdrew from gwen's reach, not wanting to face her in that moment. overwhelmed by a mix of emotions, you massaged your temples, trying to calm the storm brewing inside you.
gwen understood that you needed space, but she couldn't bear the thought of leaving things unresolved. she had to fix this. "i'm so, so sorry! i didn't mean what i said, i really didn't," she pleaded, her voice frantic. "i was just mad, okay? i didn't think before i spoke. please, give me a chance to explain."
as gwen spoke, her voice started fading away, and you felt a tingling sensation intensify in your head. suddenly, you realized what it was—it was your spider sense.
turning towards the m.o.d.a.a.k. cocoon, time seemed to slow down as you saw him slice a slit in the silk, preparing to launch an attack. without hesitation, you pushed gwen to the floor, your instincts taking over to protect her.
chaos ensued as other spider people rushed to contain the situation. in the midst of the commotion, you felt a sharp, stabbing pain in your side. instinctively, you reached down to grip the source of the pain, only to have your hand come away wet with blood. you had taken the blow intended for gwen.
m.o.d.a.a.k. had shot you.
your vision grew hazy as the pain intensified, and you realized the gravity of the situation. in that moment, all the hurt and anger faded away, replaced by a deep concern for your own well-being. as everything faded to darkness, you couldn't help but wonder if gwen would realize the depth of her feelings before it was too late.
"(y/n), are you okay?" gwen yelled out, her instincts kicking in as she rushed to your side, her voice filled with urgency.
her eyes widened as she took in the sight of you, blood pouring from your wounds. a wave of worry washed over her, and her stomach twisted with fear. "hey, stay with me," she pleaded.
weakly, you managed to ask, "gwen, are you okay?"
her heart ached at the sound of your weakened voice. "stay with me, please," she repeated, her tone softer this time, her own fear causing her mouth to go dry.
desperately, gwen reached out to you, her hand trembling as she brushed against your arm, wanting to offer some form of comfort. but in the face of such a dire situation, she felt utterly helpless. the pool of blood around you was expanding rapidly, and the gravity of the situation weighed heavily on her. doubts and fears raced through her mind, fearing that she might lose you.
"shhh, just relax. breathe," you whispered, your voice filled with a mixture of pain and reassurance. gwen listened attentively, doing as you instructed, taking deep breaths in an attempt to calm herself.
as you felt her tension ease, a faint smile tugged at the corners of your lips. despite your own condition, you wanted to provide her with some comfort.
gwen felt a glimmer of relief as she saw you momentarily relax. your bloody hand rested on her chest, seeking solace in her touch as she held you tightly in her arms.
but as time passed, your eyelids grew heavier, and your consciousness slipped in and out. the world around you faded into darkness as you succumbed to the overwhelming blood loss, and you passed out.
"no, no, no..." gwen whispered to herself, her voice filled with a mix of anguish and determination.
with tears welling up in her eyes, gwen carefully lifted your limp body, cradling you in her arms. she refused to let despair consume her. with every ounce of strength she could summon, she reassured you, whispering that everything would be alright.
in a display of unwavering resolve, gwen carried you, her steps steady but her heart heavy, as she made her way towards help. the weight of her emotions—fear, worry, concern, anxiety, and regret—pressed upon her, but she took a deep breath, determined to stay strong for your sake.
as she gently placed you onto a gurney, the tension in her body was evident.
a day had passed since the incident, and you had undergone surgery. surprisingly, you fared better than expected, and as you sat up, you realized you were in the emergency care department of the headquarters. clad in a hospital gown, you slowly lifted it, revealing the bandages wrapped around your wounds.
confusion clouded your mind until you noticed gwen entering the room, dressed in her normal attire. her eyes widened upon seeing you awake, a mix of relief and worry evident on her face.
"you're awake!" she exclaimed, a big smile forming on her face.
gwen approached you cautiously, her gaze fixed on the bandages and hospital gown that concealed your injuries.
"how do you feel?" she asked.
she stepped closer before taking a seat on your bedside, unable to contain her emotions, and quickly wrapped her arms around you in a strong embrace. your body tensed in pain from your abdomen as you let out a small gasp, but her presence provided a sense of comfort.
"what the hell happened?" you asked, sitting up, your bewilderment evident.
as you posed the question, gwen's face turned nervous, her voice slightly trembling. "that m.o.d.a.a.k. shot you," she replied, the words catching in her throat. "you took the bullet for me."
her gratitude spilled forth as her eyes studied your form. "thank you," she added, her voice filled with a mix of appreciation and remorse.
taken aback by her words, you felt a flood of memories rush back, the events of the fight and her hurtful remark resurfacing in your mind like a turbulent wave.
"yeah, i remember," you recalled, rubbing your head as a headache set in. "that happened after..."
the words caught in your throat as you couldn't bring yourself to say it, the memory of gwen calling you a waste of time after you had confessed your feelings still fresh in your mind.
sensing the tension in the air, gwen acknowledged the weight of the past events. "yeah... that fight," she replied softly, her voice tinged with regret.
the realization that you were now in a better state and on the path to recovery prompted gwen to address the lingering issue. determination flickered in her eyes as she mustered the courage to explain herself.
"yeah, um, i wanted to talk about that," gwen began. "what i said... i didn't mean any of it, okay? i was just angry."
as gwen placed her hands on your arm to stop you from rubbing your head, you pulled your arm away, a hint of skepticism in your voice. "you keep saying that, gwen," you commented. "really, don't force yourself to be around me. especially if you don't feel the way i do. just because i took a hit for you doesn't mean you owe me this," you explained, your words laced with a mix of resignation and self-preservation.
gwen frowned and looked away, a mixture of hurt and determination flickering in her eyes. "it's not about you taking a bullet for me," she replied, her voice soft but earnest. "it's about me hurting you with those comments i made. i didn't mean a single word of what i said. and i'm not forcing myself to do anything... i love being around you, (y/n)."
she spoke with sincerity, her words carrying the weight of remorse. "i said those things because i was an idiot, not because i think you're a waste of time. because you aren't."
you couldn't help but feel a surge of confusion as you searched her eyes for answers. "if it's not that, then what's your problem?" you asked, your tone a mix of frustration and curiosity.
gwen fell silent for a few moments, her gaze fixed on the floor as she grappled with her emotions. "fear," she finally answered, her voice barely above a whisper.
her confession hung in the air, and she continued, her voice gaining strength. "fear of getting too attached, fear of hurting you by accident, fear of falling in love..." her vulnerability was clear as she admitted her feelings openly. "i just don't want to mess things up, okay? it's been a struggle for me to feel comfortable with... commitment. it's complicated."
moved by her honesty, you reached out and gently took her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "gwen, you can talk to me," you assured, your voice filled with empathy.
taking a deep breath, gwen met your gaze directly, her eyes filled with a mix of relief and nervousness. "you're right," she replied, her voice steadier now. "i've been avoiding you because i was scared. scared that..."
she paused, gathering her thoughts before continuing. "i have always liked you more than a friend," she stated, her words blunt and honest. "but i was worried that i might ruin our friendship if i admitted it to you. so i ended up pushing you away. i'm sorry."
the shock was evident on your face as you processed her words. "you like me back?" you asked, your voice filled with surprise. "so the whole time you were avoiding me... you were scared?"
gwen nodded quietly, a tinge of embarrassment coloring her cheeks. "i- yeah," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. "but i was nervous to spend time with just the two of us. it felt like something changed between us. and i guess i didn’t want my feelings to be confirmed, even tho being away from you did the exact opposite.”
she looked down, feeling a mix of nervousness and shame. "i can't believe i was acting like this toward someone i like. how stupid am i?" her voice trailed off, her self-criticism evident.
placing a hand on her cheek, you gently turned her face to meet your gaze. "hey, hey," you spoke softly, your thumb stroking her cheek. "that's all in the past now. i know it's hard to be vulnerable, but you can do it."
gwen's heart fluttered at your touch, a warmth filling her. your words resonated deeply within her, and she felt a newfound determination take hold. "you're right," she replied, her voice more confident. "i can do it. and that's what i want to do—to be vulnerable with you."
you grinned at her as the gentle touch of your thumb on her cheek stirred something within her. with a surge of courage, gwen leaned in, meeting your lips in a tender, heartfelt kiss.
gwen's lips met yours in a tender, passionate kiss, her weight pressing against you slightly as you instinctively put both hands up to cup her cheek. closing your eyes, you surrendered to the moment, savoring the feeling of her lips against yours.
the sensation of gwen's kiss was like a dream come true, an intoxicating blend of passion and love that left you breathless. she continued to kiss you, her lips moving with a fervent energy that sent tingles of excitement throughout your entire body. in that moment, all worries and nerves faded away, replaced by the sheer intensity of the connection between you.
as you pulled back slightly, your eyes locked with gwen's, a joyful giggle escaping your lips. a broad smile spread across your face, reflecting the happiness that filled your heart.
gwen's heart raced, her stomach aflutter as she met your gaze. it was a sensation she had never experienced before, but one she embraced fully. "you have no idea how long i've been wanting to do that," she confessed, her voice slightly breathless. "thank you for being so understanding," she added, her smile radiant.
taking a moment to readjust herself, gwen mirrored your earlier gesture, placing her hand gently on your cheek. the weight of her touch felt light, yet it conveyed a profound sense of happiness and contentment.
"of course, i'll always understand you," you reassured her, your voice filled with sincerity. you chuckled at her remark. "well, we don't have to wait around anymore, do we?" you playfully remarked, leaning in for another kiss. in that moment, it felt like everything was falling into place.
gwen wrapped her arms around your neck, drawing herself even closer to you, her body moving in sync with yours. the taste of your mouth was both sweet and comforting, fueling a strength within her.
she wished this moment could last forever, but she knew that reality would eventually intrude, bringing an end to this blissful interlude.
so, gwen allowed herself to fully immerse in the joy of the present, cherishing every second of this special kiss, knowing deep down that it would become one of the most cherished memories of this unforgettable summer.
© 2023 primaviva — likes, replies, and reblogs are appreciated!
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lunarlianna · 1 year
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Ceres asteroid
Ceres, originally an asteroid and now considered a Dwarf Planet by astronomers, plays a pivotal role in astrology. Often associated with nurturing, attachment, and self-care, Ceres sheds light on our relationships and well-being. This celestial body's placement in your birth chart unveils how you express love, seek support, and approach finances, offering valuable insights into your personal growth and nurturing style. Ceres symbolizes the natural world, the ever-changing rhythms of the seasons, womanhood, fertility, parenting, and reproduction. Ceres, also known as Demeter in Greek mythology, is the goddess of agriculture and motherly relationships. The myth centers around her daughter, Persephone in Greek Mythology.  While often relevant within a 1-3º orb with Natal Planets, Ceres provides insights based on House and Sign placement, addressing key aspects of our relationships and well-being.
Ceres in signs
Ceres in Aries: you possess a strong sense of self-sufficiency and independence, often relying on your inner drive to support both yourself and those around you. You tend to seize opportunities with enthusiasm and speed. However, it's important to approach impulsiveness and anger with mindfulness, as they can occasionally affect your self-care. Sports and competition boost your well-being. In relationships, you seek partners who empower you and ignite your fearless spirit.
Ceres in Taurus: you're the dependable and stable force in your loved ones' lives, working hard to create a comfortable future for them. You seek partners who can provide abundance and completeness. Nurturing, for you, is all about physical touch and creating a cozy environment. With Ceres feeling right at home in Taurus, you excel at building long-lasting abundance and using resources wisely. You may find joy in supporting others materially and have a deep connection to the physical world, your senses, and the pleasures of life, especially through food and nature.
Ceres in Gemini: you're drawn to a partner who can intellectually stimulate and inspire your growth through meaningful communication and learning. Nurturing your mind is essential, and you may find joy in acquiring knowledge, mastering various subjects, or simply using your mental energy wisely. However, remember not to push yourself too hard to prevent burnout. You excel at providing mental support, especially to younger individuals, and your natural gift for teaching and effective communication shines through.
Ceres in Cancer: taking care of your emotional well-being is crucial, and having a strong support system is key to feeling fulfilled. While you may have physical comforts, they can feel empty without sufficient emotional fulfillment. You tend to be exceptionally supportive of others emotionally, sometimes giving more than receiving, which should be balanced. A stable home and family life are vital for your personal growth. You prioritize creature comforts like being at home and cooking, focusing on stability and connections in life.
Ceres in Leo: you're a motivated go-getter who pursues your desires with determination. You're attracted to bold and confident partners who earn your respect and admiration, providing you with a sense of confidence. Your creative side is a source of self-nurturing, and it offers opportunities for the attention you crave. Supporting and encouraging children, whether your own or others, brings you fulfillment, and your hobbies provide solace and support. It's essential to address any issues related to your need for attention, as self-expression, recognition, and love are fundamental to your growth and success.
Ceres in Virgo: you embody devotion and nurturing, using your intellect and practicality to create a caring environment for loved ones. In relationships, you're loyal and go to great lengths for your partner, seeking empowerment, avoid any situations where you might be taken for granted. Your path to growth involves competence, self-discipline, and a quest for excellence. You find comfort in well-organized settings, and maintaining daily routines plays a vital role in nurturing yourself. You express support through subtle acts of kindness. However, it's essential to address any tendencies towards perfectionism and self-criticism, as they can sometimes affect your self-confidence.
Ceres in Libra: you bring patience and nurturing to your relationships, cherishing the importance of love and care. You seek partners who inspire your independence. Beauty, grace, and cooperation are your guiding principles, and you find deep fulfillment in meaningful connections with people you profoundly respect. It's vital for you to maintain a balance in giving and receiving support. Your strong suits include negotiation, compromise, and mediation, which play a significant role in fostering harmony in your relationships.
Ceres in Scorpio: you possess a natural gift for nurturing and empowering those around you, uplifting them and making them recognize their self-worth. In relationships, you seek loyalty and trust, as these qualities are essential for your sense of strength and security. Your path to growth centers on deep, intimate connections with others, emphasizing self-empowerment. However, remember to reserve some for yourself and maintain a balance in giving and receiving. Intimacy plays a crucial role in boosting your confidence, and you thrive in relationships marked by strong physical and emotional bonds.
Ceres in Sagittarius: Your journey to growth and success involves the freedom to expand your horizons and explore the philosophies, religions, laws, and cultures of the world, fostering a deep connection to the world's diverse perspectives. Your nurturing style can vary; you may either find it challenging to provide support due to your desire for personal space or offer substantial support to others, often excelling as a mentor or through effective communication. In relationships, you seek someone who can ignite your passion for exploration and provide you with knowledge, empowering you to stand up for your beliefs.
Ceres in Capricorn: in relationships, you seek a partner who supports your goals and ambitions, providing stability and encouragement to help you achieve success. Your sense of nourishment often comes from pursuing your goals, and while you may not have felt fully supported in your younger years, you tend to amass resources and security as you grow older. Nonetheless, it's crucial to strike a balance and avoid overburdening yourself with excessive responsibilities, especially in supporting others. Remember to care for yourself along the way.
Ceres in Aquarius: you're here to champion change and support the collective good. In your relationships, you seek partners who share your vision of making positive contributions to society, and their unwavering support fuels your drive for revolution. Your personal growth path centers on nurturing your uniqueness and embracing your individuality. Your friends are a crucial source of support, and your involvement in meaningful causes empowers you to impact the lives of others positively. However, you might need to work on connecting more deeply with your emotions and reducing any tendencies toward emotional detachment to strengthen your relationships.
Ceres in Pisces: that's you – the empathetic soul. You've walked in others' shoes, and your love fiercely shields your dear ones from life's harshness. In love, you seek someone who can keep you grounded, as you tend to escape into a vibrant world to evade the darkness of reality. For you, growth and success come from your wellspring of compassion, unwavering faith, and trust. You're the ultimate caregiver, often putting others' needs before your own. Remember, it's okay to prioritize yourself and embrace self-care.
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maladaptiveobsession · 6 months
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yandere adam headcanons
contains: brief dubcon mention, manipulation, emotional/mental abuse, degradation
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yandere adam
who, under all the false bravado, is insecure. cuckolded twice—and by the same man no less—how could he not be? the overwhelming anxiety of losing you haunts him. try as he might, loud vulgarities make terrible compensation for confidence.
who sabotages any meaningful relationships. what do you mean you’re lonely? this is heaven; you’re surrounded by others! the company you keep never satisfies your desire for connection, seemingly close yet just out of reach. despite your best efforts, you couldn’t seem to form any deep attachments. the mental isolation will wear you down and warp your thoughts. were you even worth keeping around? distraught and rejected, adam will pull you out of the depths of your despair. who needs those stains? they don’t appreciate you like he does; don’t care for you like he does. you can see it now, can’t you? he’s the only one for you.
who openly tears you down with stinging criticism, finding fault in all that you do. his denigrations are no more than projected insecurities. though he casts a confident image, he is doubtful and hesitant. his harassment is subtle; any concerns you bring up brushed off and met with admonishment. don’t be so sensitive! that’s just how he is! you must be misunderstanding him. adam himself hardly recognizes his arraignment, sending crude remarks your way merely out of habit. he’s never meant any of it, often leaving himself wondering why he pressures you so much. it’s not that he takes pleasure in your dejection, but rather that he subconsciously recognizes his own faults. he knows he’s no good for you and that you deserve better. so he tears you down as he does himself, hoping that if you have no confidence in yourself, you’ll settle for him. though he means none of what he says, don’t expect any apologies. he’s convinced himself he’s above apologies, above you.
who takes what he wants, always pushing your boundaries, never asking for permission. it’s only natural; you belong to him. i mean, who asks their toys for consent to play? things would be so much simpler if you just cooperated. who cares if he plays a little rough? you can take it. that being said, adam views you less as an object and more as an extension of him.
who’s never far. what do you mean you’re going out? don’t go anywhere just yet; he’s coming with. no matter the destination or occasion, he’ll be there. what if you never come back? what if you leave him?
who’s entitled. he was the first soul to enter heaven; he’s earned this! you think you’re too good for him or something? you should be happy that he chose you! he has plenty of sluts lined up to ride the original dick; he could easily replace you. empty threats, yet stinging all the same.
who craves your worship. paradoxical as it is, he is annoyingly conceited yet also self-deprecating. having been divorced twice, he often worries he’s inadequate. so he overcompensates confidence to the point of arrogance. his doubt in your faithfulness connects to his past trauma, so compliment his features, praise his accomplishments, and let him know just how much you appreciate and enjoy being around him. he may not say thank you, but you can tell just how much he values your opinions.
who demands your attention. evading him is nearly impossible. he’ll take offense, of course, but ultimately see it as a challenge. clearly you were ignoring him because you wanted his attention! why else would you avoid him? no worries, babe! he’s all yours! isn’t he so generous?
who shows you off, proudly announcing your relation to everyone you meet. all of heaven, perhaps even some of hell, will know of you. whether you’re with adam or not, crowds will whisper, point, and goggle as you wander. you’re his bitch, hot stuff! get used to it! he wants everyone to see just how out of reach you are. you’re his, only his
who derives no pleasure from hurting you. adam will never physically harm you. underneath that crude exterior, he truly does care for you. he can give you everything, anything! just don’t abandon him. to keep you by his side, nothing is above him.
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liliomme · 1 year
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✩ Solar Return Chart Observation [Part 2] .𖥔 ݁ ˖
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Take this with a grain of salt.
⭑ Scorpio Rising
With Scorpio rising in the solar return chart, the upcoming year is likely to be marked by intense personal growth, emotional depth, and transformative experiences. You may find yourself drawn to introspection and self-discovery, seeking to understand hidden aspects of yourself and your motivations. Emotional intensity and passion will play a significant role in your relationships and endeavors, and you may encounter opportunities for profound transformation and empowerment. Embracing the transformative energies of Scorpio can lead to a year of powerful growth and self-awareness, but it's essential to face emotional challenges with courage and self-awareness to make the most of this transformative period.
⭑ Libra Rising
With Libra rising in the solar return chart, a "glow-up" is likely to manifest as a period of positive transformation in appearance, charm, and social grace during the upcoming year. Individuals with this influence may find themselves paying more attention to their style and grooming, exuding a refined and sophisticated aura. Their enhanced social skills and diplomatic approach to interactions can attract new friendships and networking opportunities. Embracing Libra's appreciation for beauty, they may also invest in creating a more aesthetically pleasing living space, leading to increased confidence and fulfillment in various aspects of their life.
⭑ Venus in 11th House
With Venus in the 11th house of your solar return chart, the upcoming year is likely to be marked by a strong focus on friendships, social connections, and the pursuit of shared goals and aspirations. The 11th house represents community, social circles, and the fulfillment of long-term objectives. With Venus in this house, you may find yourself drawn to social events, group activities, and collaborations with like-minded individuals. Your interactions with friends and acquaintances are likely to be harmonious and enjoyable, and you may have opportunities to form new friendships or strengthen existing bonds. This placement encourages you to prioritize cooperation and teamwork, as well as to support and celebrate the achievements of those in your social network. Additionally, your appreciation for beauty and aesthetics may influence your involvement in artistic or creative group projects, further enhancing your sense of fulfillment and joy within your social circles.
Venus in the 11th house can also indicate a favorable period for pursuing humanitarian causes and participating in activities that contribute to the greater good. You may feel more compassionate and inclined to support the well-being of others in your community or in broader social spheres. This placement encourages you to be open-minded and receptive to diverse perspectives, fostering a sense of inclusivity and fairness within your social interactions. Embracing the energies of Venus in the 11th house can lead to a fulfilling and harmonious year, where your involvement in meaningful social connections and shared objectives brings joy, personal growth, and a sense of purpose.
⭑ Venus in Pisces
Venus in Pisces indicates that during the upcoming year, your focus may be on fostering deep emotional connections and exploring the more spiritual and compassionate aspects of love. This placement can bring a sense of idealism and a desire for transcendent experiences in your relationships. It encourages you to embrace your artistic and creative side, allowing your imagination and empathy to play a significant role in your interactions with others. Your year is likely to be marked by a heightened sensitivity to beauty and a desire to bring harmony and understanding into your social interactions and romantic endeavors.
⭑ Venus in Leo
With Venus in Leo in your solar return chart, the upcoming year is likely to be filled with passion, creativity, and a desire for recognition and appreciation in your relationships and endeavors. Venus in Leo brings a sense of confidence and flair to your romantic interactions, making you more expressive and dramatic in expressing your affections. You may seek attention and admiration from others, and your charm and magnetic presence can draw admirers and potential romantic interests into your life.
This placement also encourages you to express your creativity and indulge in activities that bring you joy and pleasure. You may feel more inspired to pursue artistic endeavors or engage in hobbies that allow you to showcase your talents and individuality. Your ability to radiate warmth and generosity can enhance your social interactions and strengthen your friendships.
⭑ Venus Conjuct Mars
Venus conjunct Mars in a solar return chart brings a potent blend of passion, desire, and creativity to the forefront during the upcoming year. This alignment suggests a heightened sense of attraction and magnetism, making you more assertive in pursuing romantic interests and expressing your affections. Your relationships are likely to be infused with a fiery and dynamic energy, leading to intense and exciting encounters. This conjunction also enhances your creative drive, inspiring you to channel this passionate energy into artistic pursuits or projects that allow you to showcase your unique talents and express yourself creatively.
However, the intensity of Venus conjunct Mars can also bring challenges if not handled with care. The strong desires and assertiveness may lead to conflicts or impulsive actions, so it's essential to be mindful of communication and emotional awareness in your interactions. Embracing the passionate energies of Venus conjunct Mars can lead to a year of thrilling experiences in love and creativity, but balance and open communication are key to navigating the potential pitfalls and making the most of this transformative period.
⭑ Mars in Virgo
Mars in Virgo in a solar return chart indicates that the upcoming year will be characterized by a focus on practicality, efficiency, and attention to detail. With Mars, the planet of action and energy, in the analytical and precise sign of Virgo, you are likely to approach tasks and challenges with a methodical and disciplined mindset. This placement can enhance your ability to handle daily routines, work-related tasks, and health matters with precision and determination. You may feel a strong urge to organize your life and set clear goals, working diligently to achieve them. While this position can bring a heightened sense of productivity and a desire to improve various aspects of your life, it's essential to guard against tendencies towards perfectionism or overcritical self-assessment. By embracing the constructive and practical energies of Mars in Virgo, you can make significant strides in your pursuits and enhance your overall well-being during the year.
⭑ Lilith in 12th House
With Lilith in the 12th house of your solar return chart, the upcoming year may involve a deep exploration of your subconscious, hidden desires, and spiritual aspects of your being. This placement can bring intense emotions and a desire to break free from societal constraints, leading to personal growth and a stronger connection to your inner self.
⭑ Cancer Midheaven
With the Midheaven (MC) in Cancer in your solar return chart, the upcoming year is likely to be focused on matters related to your home, family, and emotional well-being. Cancer is a nurturing and domestic sign, and having it at the Midheaven suggests that you may be drawn towards creating a secure and comforting environment for yourself and your loved ones. During this period, your career goals and aspirations may be intertwined with your personal life, and you may seek a work-life balance that allows you to prioritize your emotional needs and the well-being of your family. Your nurturing qualities and sensitivity to others' emotions can be assets in your professional endeavors, enabling you to connect with others on a deeper level and provide support and care in your chosen field. Embracing the energies of Cancer at the Midheaven can lead to a year where you find fulfillment in nurturing both your career ambitions and the emotional bonds with those you hold dear.
⭑ Neptune in 6th House
During this period, you may find yourself seeking work that allows you to express your creativity and imagination. Your intuition and empathy may be heightened, making you more sensitive to the needs of others in your workplace or in your daily interactions. It's important to be mindful of potential escapism or a tendency to become overly idealistic about your work or health routines. Strive to maintain practicality and groundedness while embracing Neptune's positive influence of fostering a more compassionate and spiritually fulfilling approach to your daily life.
Neptune's energy can also encourage you to explore alternative healing modalities or spiritual practices to support your well-being. Pay attention to your intuition and inner guidance during this time, as Neptune's presence in the 6th house may bring valuable insights and revelations about your work, health, and overall sense of purpose. Embracing the energies of Neptune in the 6th house can lead to a year where you find new ways to integrate spirituality, compassion, and creativity into your daily life, enhancing your overall sense of fulfillment and well-being.
⭑ Asteroid Nymph in 3rd House
The presence of the Nymph asteroid in the 3rd house of your solar return chart suggests that during the upcoming year, your communication and mental activities will be influenced by themes related to beauty, charm, and artistic expression. The 3rd house represents communication, learning, and the way you express yourself on a daily basis. With the Nymph asteroid in this house, you may find yourself drawn to more creative and artistic forms of communication, such as writing poetry, engaging in storytelling, or expressing yourself through various forms of art.
Your conversations may be marked by a more graceful and charming tone, and you may have a natural ability to captivate others with your words and ideas. You may also find yourself more interested in exploring various subjects that are aesthetically pleasing or that connect to mythical or romantic themes. This placement encourages you to embrace your individuality and unique style of expression, allowing your creativity and charm to shine through in your interactions with others.
It's essential to be mindful of the potential for daydreaming or becoming lost in fantasies during this time. While the Nymph asteroid can bring a touch of enchantment and elegance to your communication, it's important to maintain focus and clarity in your daily tasks and learning endeavors. Embracing the energies of the Nymph in the 3rd house can lead to a year where you find joy in creative expression and enchant others with your charming and unique way of communicating your thoughts and ideas.
⭑ Stellium in 2nd House
A stellium in the second house of your solar return chart indicates that the upcoming year will be heavily focused on financial matters, self-worth, and values. This potent clustering of planets in this house intensifies the significance of material possessions, income, and how you perceive your own value and worth. You may experience significant changes or opportunities in your financial life, prompting you to reevaluate your priorities and delve deeper into understanding your relationship with money and possessions. This period offers a chance for personal growth and self-discovery as you work towards achieving greater financial stability and aligning your actions with your core values.
If the planets in the stellium have positive aspects to other planets, it could indicate increased opportunities for financial growth, successful investments, or improved financial stability. This could be seen as a period of financial luck or positive financial developments. Conversely, if the planets in the stellium have challenging aspects to other planets, it may indicate financial obstacles, unexpected expenses, or difficulties in managing money. This could be interpreted as a period of money problems or challenges in your financial life. (Check aspects for more info)
౨ৎ, Liliomme.
[note]
I’m considering creating a Solar Return series focused on the 7th house? more on love encounters for that year. should i proceed with this idea?
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colebabey888 · 7 days
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Networking Like an IT Girl | IT GIRL DIARIES
In today’s world, making good connections with people can be tough. Whether it’s meeting new friends or building professional relationships, it’s important to leave a good impression. Having a good circle and being able to network well with people is crucial during your IT Girl Journey. Here are some tips and tricks to help you stand out
1. Take Care of Yourself When you feel good, you look good, and confidence shines through. Healthy habits like drinking lemon water in the morning, eating lots of greens, and exercising regularly make you feel more energetic and ready to meet new people. When you feel your best, it’s easier to connect with others and make a lasting impression.
2. Be Real and Honest People appreciate honesty and being real. When you meet someone new, just be yourself. Show interest in what they have to say, ask questions, and really listen. Being genuine helps build trust, which is the foundation for meaningful friendships and professional connections.
3. Focus on a Few Good Relationships It’s better to have a few strong friendships than many shallow ones. Spend time building deep connections with people who share your values and inspire you. These relationships are more meaningful and last longer, both in your social life and in your career.
4. Show Your Personality While being professional is important, don’t be afraid to let your personality shine. Whether you’re at work or meeting new people in a social setting, showing your true self makes you more relatable and memorable. People connect with those who are genuine and open.
5. Share Your Healthy Habits Your healthy lifestyle can be a great conversation starter. Talking about things like your daily green juice, or how magnesium helps you sleep, can lead to interesting conversations and help you find people with similar interests. Plus, sharing wellness tips makes you stand out as someone who is mindful and health-conscious.
6. Keep in Touch Building strong connections takes time, so stay in touch with people. Whether it’s following up after meeting someone new or checking in with friends regularly, consistency is key. Social media can help, but personal interactions—like meeting for coffee—go a long way in keeping relationships strong.
By being yourself, taking care of your health, and staying consistent, you can build lasting connections that make you stand out in any social or professional setting. Networking like an IT Girl means showing up as your best self and nurturing relationships with kindness and care.
_____
your daily talk with @colebabey888 🎀
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novlr · 1 year
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How should I go about describing a character who goes through a lot, becoming more disheveled and desperate as the plot goes on?
Desperation is the emotion that drives characters to their limits, leading to their most intense and extreme behaviours.
By showing how characters become more desperate as your plot progresses, you can create characters that are interesting, dynamic, and relatable.
Here are some ways you can show desperation in your characters. As the plot moves forward, these elements can get worse, showing their decline.
How do they behave?
Obsessive and/or compulsive
Repetitive actions like hand wringing, or overuse of stock phrases
Self-destructive and risk-seeking
Enhanced aggression
Avoidant and isolationist
Manipulative
Exploitative
Short-tempered
Impulsive decision-making
Unrelenting pursuit of something
What physical signs do they show?
Heart palpitations and short, rapid breathing
Sweating profusely
Shaking or trembling
Sudden onset of nausea
Feeling weak or dizzy
Muscle tension
Headaches
Insomnia caused by worry and stress
Feelings of fatigue
Stomach pain and cramping
How do they interact?
Begging or pleading with others
Manipulating others to get what they want
Increasing paranoia and questioning other's motives
Pushing away loved ones
Becoming overly clingy
Either an inability to trust or being too quick to trust others
Self-sabotage
Single-focus conversations
What do they look like?
Unkempt hair and poor hygiene
Rumpled, slept-in clothing
Nervous tics, like fidgeting, pacing, or picking at nails
Extreme and unexplained weight loss
A haunted, faraway, or panicked look
Dark-rimmed, bruised eyes from lack of sleep or exhaustion
A constant sheen of sweat and clammy skin
Unusual clothing choices
What body language do they display?
Hunching over, as if trying to protect themselves
Fidgeting or pacing
Avoiding eye contact
Clenching fists or grinding teeth
Sweating or shaking
Staring intently at something
Repeatedly touching hair or face
Darting eyes and biting lips
Meek and under-confident stance
Pleading look
What is their attitude?
Feeling hopelessness
Sad and dejected
Becoming increasingly irrational
A loss of faith in themselves and others
Obsession to the point of resorting to extreme measures
A sense of helplessness
Blaming others
Feeling powerless
A sense of urgency
What are some positive things that can come out of desperation?
Increased motivation to achieve their goals or solve their problems
Resilience and adaptability in the face of adversity
Heightened creativity and resourcefulness
The ability to form deep and meaningful connections with those who share their struggles
Catharsis or character growth through their struggles
What are some negative things that can come out of desperation?
A tendency to become self-destructive or engage in risky behaviour
Difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships
Increased isolation or loneliness
Chronic stress and physical health problems
A tendency to make impulsive or irrational decisions
Prone to depression and anxiety
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chirpsythismorning · 10 months
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This got me thinking.
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You’ll notice Mike is sitting on the couch, literally in the same spot he was sitting almost a year earlier when Will confided in him for the first time about the mindflayer. Will also asked that Mike not tell the others because they wouldn’t understand.
And here we are again. Nothing's changed.
Except it has.
Now, instead of Will being right beside Mike, with them on the same level both sharing something that is weighing down on them, we have Mike sitting next to Lucas, while Will is sitting higher up above all of them. It’s only now after several signs of the mindflayer, and with everyone present, that Will is deciding to come clean about what he’s been seeing. Not one on one with Mike like before.
Just makes me wonder what Mike could have been thinking at this moment, in this exact spot.
I wonder why Will lied to me about being okay that first time at Day of the Dead? Did he really think it wasn’t a big deal? Or was something else stopping him from opening up to me like he normally would when I asked if he was okay?
Then he’s suddenly thinking about the second time it happened, at the field, which is when he ran off with El. Obviously Will wouldn’t have been able to tell him then. And then the final time at castle Byers after their rain fight… yeah that's when Will finally told them, but look what brought them here?
This also makes the ending of s3 hit a bit harder. 
I guess I’ve been feeling distant from you. Like, you’re pulling away from me or something.
While Mike has his own battle he’s dealing with when it comes to choosing El over Will and the party at times, I think this realization that this played a role in Will distancing himself instead of confiding in Mike like he did before, is such an interesting concept.
I was worrying too much about El and… I don’t know. Maybe I feel like I lost you or something…
It's as if Mike has already outright told us why he latched onto El in the first place and how it directly correlated with why he felt like he lost Will (lost exclusive best friend perks? idk dude is dramatic).
That it was about worry for him when it came to El. Concern. Care.
What he feels for El is deep and meaningful, but it also comes with a dose of obligation and responsibility. Mike feels extremely indebted to El after everything she has does for them. Not only has she had to endure so much because of those around her expecting things from her, but that also includes Mike. His worry for her is fairly warranted.
Mike's attempt in s3 to be as normal as possible, while simultaneously trying to juggle his care for El and his relationship with Will and his other friends... it's just interesting seeing how it plays out and where it all leads to.
In s3, but especially s4, there is this distinction that Mike makes, where he separates Will from their other friends. He also then compares his relationship with El to theirs and how it's negatively impacted them because of his feelings and behavior...
If it was really platonic between him and Will, why in the hell is he making these distinctions at all? Why is he separating Will from the category with his friends and putting him into a category with his gf...?
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crystalsenergy · 1 year
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Juno in signs ✨🤝✨ (unraveling asteroids #3)
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Juno is an asteroid strongly related to commitment, agreements, long-lasting relationships established through some form of partnership.
Because of this, we can look to Juno both to understand
our ideal partnership style for business
and for serious, long-term romantic relationships.
This is because I see Venus as the love that is built, our actions , ways, when it comes to demonstrating and living love. Juno, in my view, represents the solid relationship we want to achieve. Therefore, it doesn't represent as much our expressions within the relationship but rather how we want the relationship to be. Any doubts, please ask, and I'll respond!
Below, I've brought Juno in each of the signs in the context of partnerships.
Juno in Aries: Those with this placement seek partnerships with independence, with individuals who value initiative, the importance of trying, individuals with courage. They tend to have a tendency toward independence in their most solid partnerships.
Juno in Taurus: Here, there's no rush; it's expected that each person acts and lives at their own pace, enjoying the rhythm and steps being taken. Those with this placement seek partnerships that bring stability, calm, security, and often have a keen sense of aesthetics and attachment.
Juno in Gemini: Those with this placement seek partnerships that bring movement, especially mental stimulation, and a certain air of intellectualism and variability. They seek partnerships that are highly adaptable and communicative individuals who are curious.
Juno in Cancer: Those with this placement seek relationships with emotional security, where they can share their inner life. They will only feel secure and comfortable with individuals who bring this emotional security. Partnerships need to be primarily emotional; emotional connection is very important.
Juno in Leo: Those with this placement seek partnerships that express more of their inner desires, what's in their hearts and egos. They aspire to partnerships with protagonism, self-confidence, and expression of inner life.
Juno in Virgo: Individuals with this placement seek partnerships that have a strong sense of organization, problem-solving, and an understanding of the importance of commitment and logic. They seek adaptable partnerships but ones that keep their feet firmly on the ground.
Juno in Libra: Those with this placement prefer partnerships with diplomatic, kind individuals who seek harmony and balance, are sophisticated in some way, always looking for a middle ground rather than extremes. They appreciate people who listen to more than one opinion before making decisions.
Juno in Scorpio: Those with this placement seek deep, sometimes intense, transformative partnerships with individuals who can somehow provide that. They seek all-or-nothing partnerships with loyalty and a readiness to delve into deeper matters without fear.
Juno in Sagittarius: Those with this placement seek expansive, optimistic, sincere partnerships that are somewhat philosophical or interested in seeking the meaning of life. These are partnerships that aim to expand, grow, and find something meaningful.
Juno in Capricorn: Those with this placement seek partnerships with responsible, solid individuals who bring some form of stability, especially on a material level. These are individuals who are strongly inclined to seek partnerships with traditional, conservative values.
Juno in Aquarius: In contrast, those with this placement seek partnerships with original, innovative, rational, open-minded individuals who have a greater social empathy and altruism and are focused on social issues. Aquarius can also manifest through a tendency toward technology.
Juno in Pisces: Those with this placement seek emotionally deep partnerships with connections, empathy, and vulnerability. They prefer sensitive, empathetic, adaptable, and creative individuals to establish solid relationships and partnerships.
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astrologged · 1 year
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Psyche in the signs
Psyche (16) represents the soul and its journey of evolution, growth, and healing. It is associated with past lives and the karmic lessons that we carry with us from one lifetime to another. The placement of Psyche can reveal our deepest wounds and the areas where we need to heal and grow.
Psyche in Aries: You have a strong desire for independence and self-expression. You are a self-starter and often take the initiative in relationships and projects. In a past life, you may have been impulsive and prone to taking risks without considering the consequences. You likely had to learn how to control your anger and channel your energy in a constructive way. You may have also been involved in physical or athletic pursuits, or leadership roles that required courage and confidence. Overall, your soul's journey may involve learning how to balance your assertiveness with sensitivity to others' needs.
Psyche in Taurus: In a past life, you had to learn about the value of material possessions and the importance of financial security. You may have been involved in some form of artistic expression or had a talent for music, painting, or sculpture. You had to learn how to appreciate the beauty of the physical world and find stability in it. You may have also struggled with being possessive or overly attached to material things, and had to learn how to let go of attachments and find inner peace. In this life, you may have a strong desire for financial stability and a comfortable home environment. You also have a talent for creating beauty in the physical world and appreciate the finer things in life.
Psyche in Gemini: Your soul's journey involves learning how to communicate effectively and express yourself clearly. You have a natural curiosity and a love for learning, and you’re drawn to fields such as teaching, writing, or public speaking. In a past life, you may have been a messenger or a diplomat, and you had to learn how to use your words wisely and avoid misunderstandings. Your challenge in this lifetime may involve developing the ability to focus and pay attention to details, as you tend to get distracted easily or scatter your energy. You also need to learn how to listen more effectively and be present in your interactions with others, rather than constantly thinking about what to say next. By developing your communication skills and learning how to express your thoughts clearly and concisely, you can fulfill your soul's purpose and contribute to the world in a meaningful way.
Psyche in Cancer: The soul's journey involves emotional healing and nurturing. In past lives, you may have experienced deep emotional pain or trauma, which has led to a need for emotional security and protection in this lifetime. You have a strong desire to care for and protect others, and you are highly sensitive to the emotional needs of those around you. You may have had a past life as a caregiver, healer, or in some form of nurturing role. You have a natural ability to connect with others on a deep emotional level and may be drawn to work in fields such as psychology or counseling. However, you also have a tendency to take on the emotional burdens of others and struggle with setting healthy boundaries. Learning to care for yourself as well as others is an important lesson for you in this lifetime. By working on your own emotional healing, you can become a source of comfort and support for those around you.
Psyche in Leo: The soul's journey involves learning how to express oneself creatively and confidently. You have a strong desire to be recognized and appreciated for your talents and unique qualities. However, in a past life, you may have struggled with being too focused on yourself and your own ego. You may have been involved in leadership roles, the arts, or entertainment in your past life. Your challenge is to find a healthy balance between expressing your creativity and shining your light while also being mindful of others' needs and emotions. You may also need to learn to receive praise and recognition gracefully and without becoming too attached to it. Overall, with Psyche in Leo, your soul's journey involves learning to express your true self in a confident and authentic way while also recognizing and honoring the worth and value of others.
Psyche in Virgo: in your natal chart, it suggests that in a past life, you had to learn how to be of service to others and pay attention to the details. You may have had a strong urge to help and heal others, and they were likely involved in some form of service work. You may have also been very analytical and detail-oriented, and you had to learn how to balance this with their desire to help others. You were probably a perfectionist and had to learn how to accept imperfections in yourself and others. In this lifetime, they you feel fulfilled by working in fields such as healthcare, counseling, or education where you can use your skills to help others. You also find inner fulfillment through practicing self-care and maintaining a healthy routine.
Psyche in Libra: Your soul's journey is focused on finding balance and harmony in your relationships with others. You have a deep desire for fairness and justice, and you strive to create harmonious relationships with those around you. In a past life, you may have been involved in law or diplomacy, where you had to negotiate and mediate between different parties. You may also have been involved in artistic pursuits, as Libra is associated with beauty and aesthetics. Your soul's journey may involve learning to make decisions based on your own needs, rather than constantly seeking the approval of others. You also need to work on setting healthy boundaries and standing up for yourself when necessary, while still maintaining harmony and balance in your relationships. Overall, Psyche in Libra indicates a strong focus on relationships and creating harmony in your interactions with others, both in this life and in past lives.
Psyche in Scorpio: Your soul's journey of evolution and growth involves facing your deepest fears and desires and transforming your shadow self. You may have intense emotional experiences and may be drawn to the mysterious and occult. You may have a deep interest in sexuality and the unconscious mind. In a past life, you may have been involved in deep spiritual or healing practices, or you may have had experiences that led you to confront your shadow side. Your soul may have chosen to incarnate with Psyche in Scorpio to continue this journey of transformation and evolution. You may also have a strong psychic or intuitive ability, and you may be able to sense things that are hidden or not easily visible to others. You have a tendency towards being secretive or keeping things hidden, but you also have a powerful urge to bring what is hidden into the light. You also have a deep desire to merge with others on a soul level, but you need to learn healthy boundaries and discernment in relationships.
Psyche in Sagittarius: Your soul's journey involves seeking higher truths and expanding your horizons. You have a deep desire to explore the world and gain knowledge through experiences. In a past life, you may have been involved in philosophy, religion, or travel, and you have a natural affinity for these areas in your current life as well. You are optimistic and idealistic, and you have a strong sense of faith in the universe and its workings. Your soul's purpose is to find meaning in life and to inspire others to do the same. However, you also struggle with restlessness and a tendency to wander, and you need to learn how to focus your energy and commit to a path that aligns with your true purpose.
Psyche in Capricorn: You may have a strong sense of responsibility and a desire for success and achievement. In a past life, you may have learned the importance of discipline, hard work, and perseverance. You may have had to overcome obstacles and challenges to achieve your goals. You also have a strong desire to be respected and admired by others. However, there may also be a tendency to take on too much responsibility and to be overly self-critical. Youneed to learn to balance your desire for achievement with self-care and relaxation. You also need to work on developing healthy boundaries and learning to delegate tasks to others. On a deeper level, it may indicate a past life where you were involved in business or government, and you had to learn about the importance of responsibility, authority, and leadership. You may have had to overcome challenges and setbacks to achieve your goals, but you ultimately learned important lessons about hard work and perseverance.
Psyche in Aquarius: You have a strong desire to be part of something bigger than yourself and to contribute to society in a meaningful way. You are attracted to social causes and are passionate about bringing about positive change in the world. You are highly idealistic and may have a vision for the future that is ahead of its time. In a past life, you may have been involved in some form of activism or social work. You were likely ahead of your time in terms of your ideas and may have faced opposition or persecution for your beliefs. You may have been involved in progressive movements or been part of a group or community that was pushing for change. You have a unique and innovative approach to problem-solving, and you are not afraid to think outside the box. You value freedom and independence and may have a rebellious streak. However, you also have a strong sense of social responsibility and may feel a sense of duty to use your talents and abilities to make a positive impact on the world.
Psyche in Pisces: Your soul journey involves exploring the deeper spiritual and emotional realms. You have a strong intuition and a natural connection to the collective unconscious. You may have past life experiences of being involved in spiritual practices or healing, and may feel a strong sense of compassion and empathy towards others. However, you may also struggle with boundaries and may need to learn how to protect yourself from becoming overwhelmed by other people's emotions. Your soul's purpose in this life may involve exploring your own spirituality and helping others to connect with their spiritual selves. You may also need to learn how to balance your sensitivity with practicality in order to achieve your goals.
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fourtified-au · 2 months
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Take me as I am, take my life
I would give it all, I would sacrifice
Quick sketch that I did yesterday morning. It isn't very clean in terms of perspective and anatomy. I did want to draw up something with these two regardless to disclose how deep their relationship goes. Hopefully, I depicted that alright.
I'm still not entirely open about the depths of this AU. I've been dealing with a major mental block for nearly a year now that's been causing me not to draw and write as often. So my confidence is scarce. I do believe the piece speaks for itself. Though I am aware that I occasionally hand these pieces over without too much context. Sometimes, there isn't even any in the first place. Which is why questions are encouraged even if I take a bit to get to them.
Despite all that, I still do very much enjoy expressing my artistic abilities to the Eddsworld community. As hectic as the fandom can be, I find joy in being able to share a project that I'm proud of. Some of the storyline is currently in the reworks. Other information is private for my own comfort (nothing bad, just specific topics that I'd rather not get into as of right now). But even if I am a lil shy of posting more consequential art such as this, I still do strive to deliver meaningful portraits that represent life. I, with all my heart, really do appreciate the frequent support flying in. It motivates me to continue onward.
Hoping for better days. <3
(Do note for this specific piece that not every person shares the same exact symptoms when it comes to disorders and illnesses. I do not intend to draw these pieces out of malice. This is entirely based off of personal research and conversing with those close to me who have GI/IBD issues. If I do happen to portray something wrongly, you're free to reach out in an approachable matter.)
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