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cressidagrey · 2 days ago
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Such A Mystery - Part 9
Pairing: Max Verstappen x Colette Leclerc (Original Character)
Summary:
Max Verstappen fell in love at the ripe old age of 12 and never looked back.
Colette Leclerc really regrets posting that particular Taylor Swift Lyric to her private Instagram account, because it made George Russell go insane.  
The rest of the world has absolutely no idea that the Dutch Lion and Charles Leclerc’s twin sister have been a couple for 15 years and are expecting a baby. 
Warnings: 
Pregnancy, Mention of multiple miscarriages, Pregnancy complications, George Russell Bashing (he's probably really nice in real life but in this, he's the bad guy, sorry), Jos Verstappen, We have apparently now reached the time where I also bash Ferrari. I am sure they are super nice in real life too. They are not in this.
Author Notes: Huge thanks to @llirawolf for holding my hand through this. Chapter 8 of...who knows.
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It felt like forever. He knew it wasn't. It must have been minutes until the car door was ripped open and Charles slipped in right next to him.
It wasn’t until the doors were slammed shut behind Charles that Max dared to look at the Monégasque.
His heart skipped a beat at the sight. Charles was still in his racing suit just as him, the suit itself streaked with sweat.
The moment the car door closed, the car started riving.
"Merde," Charles cursed. Max could only agree. "I am sorry, that it took this long."
Max gave a sharp, jerky shake of his head. "You don’t have to apologize," he somehow managed to get the words out. "I��m just..." he trailed off, a shaky exhale escaping him. "How could you make it here so fast?" he asked, casting a quick glance in his friend’s direction.
Charles snorted. "Your press officer had a shouting match with Ferrari's,“ he said simply.
If Max wasn’t so focused on not completely losing it, he might’ve been amused with the mental image. But at the moment, he could only shake his head.
Next to him, Charles let out a sigh. "Are you alright?" he asked quietly.
"No. You?" he gave back.
"I don't have a bad feeling," Charles said quietly. “Not worse than it has been for days at least.”
Twin Telepathy was apparently a thing as far as Charles and Colette were concerned. 
Quite frankly, till this day, it still weirded Max out. They just seemed to know when the other one wasn't feeling well. 95% of the time, they got sick at the same time. They communicated more easily with each other than with anyone else, and regardless of what game they played...they needed to be put on opposite teams, because otherwise nobody had a chance against them.
Max was well aware of Colette and Charles' strange connection. Even if he didn’t fully understand it. They both had some sort of sixth sense when it came to the other one, and it sometimes felt like they were talking in secret code.
"What’s it telling you right now?" he asked, his voice barely above a rough whisper.
Charles turned to him fully at that, and Max saw the way his eyes swept over him, taking in every aspect of his appearance.
Max could only imagine what Charles was seeing. He felt like a walking wreck, and there was no doubt his appearance was mirroring that.
"Colette is in pain," Charles finally said, his voice strangely quiet. "She’s scared."
That answer felt like somebody shoved a knife into Max’s stomach. He inhaled sharply, the breath catching in his throat. “Of course, she is,” he hissed through clenched teeth.
Charles seemed to sense what he was thinking, even without being telepathically connected through whatever the hell Colette and him had going on. The Monégasque reached out and took a firmer hold of his hand, the grip almost crushing.
"Don’t," Charles said firmly, his voice leaving no room for arguments. "Don’t go there. We’re gonna get to her as fast as we can."
There was a brief moment of silence, as Max tried to collect himself. He focused all his attention on the pressure of Charles' hand on his, and somehow, it actually helped.
"I feel so goddamn useless," he finally admitted, his voice rough with emotion. "I want to be with her."
"You want to try calling her before we are in the air?" Charles suggested.
That was not a bad idea, not at all. Max let out a low and slightly shaky exhale, swallowing hard. “Yeah,” he nodded. “Yeah, I…” he had to stop and clear his throat. “Yeah, I’ll try to call her.”
His hands were shaking when he pulled out his phone out of the backpack that somebody had handed off to him, already packed. Regardless of all the drama that had gone on in the RedBull garage during the year… if it really mattered, the people in there pulled off minor miracles.
Within minutes, his entire day - hell, his entire week - had been packed for him, with all the essentials of clothes and everything else he would need.
He had almost forgotten about the phone in his shaking hands, but now he just stared at the screen for a moment. His fingers were trembling so badly that just unlocking the phone was a challenge in itself.
Jimmy and Sassy were on his lockscreen...a picture that Colette had once sent him when he had been away for one of his races...the two of them laying on top of her on their couch...
Every other time Max saw the photo, it made his heart do a little funny jump. Now though, it made his chest ache. It felt like a sharp stabbing pain, and for a moment, he just sat there and stared at the picture.
Then he called her.
It rang. And it rang, and it rang again. With each passing second, that horrible knot in his stomach tightened a little more. With every ring of the bell, it got harder to breathe.
Finally, to Max’s immense and enormous relief, the line connected.
"Hey, Maxie. I put you on speaker," Victoria's voice came over the phone, sounding surprisingly calm.
A shiver of something resembling dread ran through Max, at the sound of Victoria’s voice. But he pushed past the feeling.
His thoughts were once again running wild - was it a bad sign that Colette wasn’t the one speaking to him? Or was he just overreacting..?
“Hey,” he forced the word out past the lump in his throat. "How are you feeling?" he asked, pleading for Colette's voice. Was it selfish that he just wanted to hear her tell him that everything was going to be okay?
"Better now," Colette's voice came, sounding slightly hoarse.
The words were like a shot of adrenaline, and for a moment, Max actually felt a little lightheaded. “Liefje.” He closed his eyes, just hearing her voice sending another wave of relief through him. “Are you okay? How is Bébé?”
"Bébé has decided that they would rather be born today, so I would suggest you hurry up," Victoria said drily.
"Seems like the kid already inherited Max's need for speed," Charles quipped. "How are you doing, Coco?"
"I'm good," Colette's voice replied, and Max could only imagine the eye-roll that was currently happening. He knew his girlfriend, and he had no doubt that she had been glaring at Victoria ever since the phone was put on speaker.
"Where are you?" she asked, her voice suddenly turning much softer. "You're coming, right?"
"Coming," he assured her, his heart aching. "We're coming, I promise."
"I know. I’m not worried." She sounded like she meant it, but Max could easily imagine the anxiety in her eyes.
"You'd better not worry," Charles said, and then added, "I’m keeping him from doing anything dumb."
Max shot Charles a dirty look at that, bt he swallowed down the annoyed protest and focused back on Colette instead. “Just…hold on a little longer, okay?”
"It's not like I can go anywhere else," Colette replied, her voice slightly amused. "I’ll keep our little speed demon in there a little lo...." She broke off and let out a quiet hiss of pain, her voice once again cut off by what Max suspected to be a particularly painful contraction.
“Colette,” he said sharply, all kinds of emotions washing over him, one by one. “Liefje, just…just breathe through it, okay?”
There was a second of panting, then, he heard her take a deep breath. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay,” she finally said. “Just…hurts like hell.”
He swallowed and clenched his free hand tightly into a fist, fighting against the urge to just jump out of the car and start running towards the airport.
Colette being in pain was not something he could deal with.
He heard her take a few more deep breaths, and he just sat there, waiting and listening and feeling absolutely useless.
"How long until you get here?" she asked after a moment, her voice breathless. He could see her in his mind, his sweet girl, sitting on the bed and clutching her belly as another contraction hit her.
"We're not even at the airport yet," he told her, and damn it, why were his eyes suddenly burning. "We’ll get there as soon as we can, okay? Just...hold on a little longer."
"What your dad said..." Colette said with a shaky voice.
"I know," he said simply, the grief raw in his voice. Neither of them were ever really going to get over the two babies they had lost. They had learnt to live with the pain, they had dealt with the heartbreak an grief...but it was always going to be scar for them.
"Max, if something…" she began, her voice a little wobbly. He could tell that she was crying, by the way her breathing got a little more hitched and ragged.
But she suddenly cut off and gasped, letting out an even breath. Another contraction..."Hey, nothing is gonna happen," he quickly said, trying to soothe her. "Nothing. I'll be there soon. I'll be there before you know, and our child will meet their parents. We will be fine, we will get through this. You, and me. Together."
"If something happens," Colette continues. "If..."
"No," he cut her off, the word coming out as a growl. "Nothing is gonna happen. You will not talk that way. You’re going to deliver a gorgeous and healthy baby, and I won’t hear anything else."
"Max..." she protested, but Max wasn’t having it.
"You’re not going anywhere," he said firmly, putting as much steel in his voice as he could. "You will be fine. Our baby will be fine, and I will be there soon and I will hold your hand and you can threaten to geld me and all of it will be okay. Just breathe.” 
He could hear the sound of her breathing, deep and even. She was trying to steady it, and Max gripped his phone tighter. He didn’t know if he was trying to hold himself together, or if he was trying to hold on to the sound of her voice.
The seconds ticked by, and then another contraction hit, and he heard her gasp out another ragged breath. Max felt like he was going to crawl out of his own skin. The idea of her in pain was like an invisible knife twisting a little deeper in his gut, each time.
"We need to go," Charles said suddenly. "We need to get into the plane." The car slowed down at that moment. "Coco, listen to me. I am going to be absolutely fucking furious with you if something happens to you," Charles told her fiercely. 
"Trust me," Colette’s voice said, sounding slightly tired. "I am very, very motivated to stay alive."
That was good. That was a good sign. If she was still being sarcastic and even a little bit cheeky…it was good.
"Just hold on," he told her again, the familiar feeling of helplessness seeping into his bones. "Just keep hanging on, for me. I love you."
“I love you too,” the words were as immediate and as fast as the sunrise each morning. "Hurry up, dammit."
"I’m trying," he replied, his voice hoarse. "I’m trying. We’re at the airport now. We’ll get there as fast as we can-" he had to stop, when he heard her let out another pained gasping sound, as another contraction clearly hit her hard.
“Goddamn,” he exclaimed, all of his muscles tense with the urge to do something. He wanted to help her, he wanted to be there to comfort her…but more than anything,  he was terrified of losing her. "Liefje, just keep breathing, okay? Breathe and stay calm."
"I’m trying to," her voice was breathless, and he knew that she was probably trying hard to fight the urge to cry out. Oh God, he hated that. He hated seeing her in pain, he loathed feeling this utterly useless.
"Go. Love you," she told him.
"I love you," he told her emphatically, wanting to say something more, but then Charles impatiently gestured at him to hurry up and get out of the car. "I...I’ll see you soon, okay? Just hang on, okay?"
"Yeah," he could tell that she was trying even harder to control her voice, trying to put on a calm and steady front for his benefit. "Just..." she cut off and let out a gasp, another contraction evidently hitting her hard. "...just hurry up before this baby decides to make their way out before you arrive, okay?"
"I will," he promised through gritted teeth. "I will, goddammit, I will, just…hang on."
He heard Colette’s pained panting, and each of her breaths was like a stab in the gut.He hated having to hang up on her
Everything in him rebelled at that. How could he, how could he possibly abandon her like that, how could he let her take on this pain and fear all by herself, without him there to hold her hand...but goddamnit, he had no choice.
He took a shuddering breath and pushed past the urge to scream, to slam his fist into something, anything. His mind was a whirlwind of emotions, ranging from the desperate need to get to her, to overwhelming panic, to anger at the universe for forcing them apart and for putting her through this pain.
Into the plane they went…it was probably the shortest amount of time between entering a plane and taking off Max had ever experienced. 
Before too long they were up in the air, flying towards Nice.
The minutes ticked by, each one passing by like a century. Max would sit in restless agitation at his seat, his mind racing back and forth. Every thought and memory came back to Colette. He just wanted to be at her side, he just wanted everything to be okay…
And instead he would be stuck on this plane for 6 hours.
He would be stuck on this goddamn plane for six hours. Six hours, each one of them filled with the knowledge that the love of his life was giving birth to their child, and he was not there to support her, to hold her hand and reassure her that everything was okay.
It was driving him absolutely insane. He couldn’t take it, he just wanted to be there, with her. He could vividly picture her, sitting in the hospital bed and gripping the rails, her face screwed up in pain as she fought through another contraction. And he was not there to comfort her.
"Maman is with her. Your sister is with her. Lorenzo and Arthur too." Charles said at that moment. “We aren't there but everybody else is."
"How can you be this calm?" Max asked him, dragging a hand through sweat damp hair.
"Don't mistake calm for not being worried," Charles said evenly, his eyes tracking Max's restless pacing of the plane. "I am worried. For her, for you and for the little one. But freaking out isn't gonna do anyone any favours right now."
"I know,” Max said, his voice still strangled tight with stress. He just couldn't get any of the images out of his mind - her struggling and fighting her way through the pain, looking more vulnerable and pale than he had ever seen her...and he was not there.
“Besides, I shouted at Ferrari’s PR and got it out of my system, so currently, I am feeling quite calm.” Charles said darkly. “I imagine that’s going to change again when I am sure that Colette and the baby are alright.”
Max just stared at him. Charles had done what?
If there was a religion that Charles Leclerc believed in then it was Ferrari.
Charles Leclerc was their golden boy. Their Il Predestinato. There was no good-natured fobbing to be had about Ferrari regardless of what issues there had been had through the years, and there had been a lot.
Charles worshipped Ferrari like a malevolent goddess. He didn’t want to hear any criticism of his team and Max had given up on that a very long time ago. 
Charles and Colette both could be the most stubborn people Max had ever match. The only one who could match their stubbornness were each other. 
"You did what?" Max stared at him, utterly flabbergasted. Charles was an absolute Ferrari fan and loyal to the very core…why the hell would he yell at the PR people?
"Why...? What did they do?"
"They weren't even going to tell me that something was wrong with Colette," Charles said darkly. "I knew it. I knew that something was off. But they didn't say anything. It was one of Red Bull's PR Staff that got me out of the cooldown room. Ferrari wouldn't have said anything to me. Ferrari didn't want me to leave either. They wanted to debrief, they wanted me to give interviews,"
Max had to resist the urge to swear. He had been so focused on the fact that he was not with Colette that he hadn't even processed the fact that Ferrari had actually kept her labour a secret from Charles, simply to make him stay and do his goddamn job for them.
"You know that that is not normal, right?" he asked him drily. "I am not telling you that everything is perfect at Red Bull but Christian would never fucking stand for that."
"You know I never expected it," Charles told him, his mouth a thin hard line. "We are the drivers. We are the stars. But we come second. First and foremost, we are assets to the team. What Ferrari wants, Ferrari gets. We drive, we get podiums, we hold the trophies, and we smile for the cameras. Everything else comes second. It doesn’t matter to them. To them, only the trophies matter. "
"That's what they want," Max told him, anger seeping into his voice. "But that's not how it should be. Ferrari is wrong. If something is wrong with your loved ones, they have no right to keep it from you like that. Especially not for the sake of a goddamn interview."
"I know," Charles said, his lips thin with bitterness. "But there's not much I can do about it, is there? We may be the top drivers on the grid, but we drive the car that the teams give us. There's only so much that we can do when the team has power over pretty much every aspect of our career. And believe me, I am going to pay a fucking price for doing what I did. I just don't care at all. It's Colette," he said sharply. "I love all my siblings. I do. I love Lorenzo and Arthur. I would do everything for them. But they aren't my twin. They aren't the second half of me," Charles said simply. "Ferrari be damned."
Max hadn't thought that he was ever going to hear these words out of Charles' mouth but here they were.
"What the fuck did Jos say by the way? What did Coco mean?" Charles demanded.
"He gave an interview to Sky Sports," Max said, fury still embering deep in his gut.
"Of course he did." Charles said, not sounding surprised at all. "What did he say?"
"Confirmed the relationship...and the pregnancy," Max said clenching his teeth. "And if that wasn't enough...he made a...comment about how it had taken us long enough to have a baby."
There was a sharp indrawn breath as Charles absorbed that. "...What?" Charles said after a moment, his voice strangled. "...he made that comment in public? Are - are you serious?"
"I never told him about the two...miscarriages," Max said quietly. "I couldn't deal with whatever well meant advice he was going to have...but I...We lost two babies," Max said weakly. "My father went out there and confirmed our relationship and the pregnancy without talking to either of us. He just made that decision because it's "ridiculous" that we kept it a secret for so long. An it’s making me furious. This wasn't his decision to make. This was ours."
"Yes," Charles said, his jaw clenching. "It was. Your decision. Nobody else’s. He had absolutely no right to do that. Goddamn it, I have never liked that man, but I've never had the urge to punch him as much as I do this very moment."
"You and me both," Max said. The anger he was feeling would have been burning through him like a damn inferno if he hadn't been so worried about Colette.
"This should have come from us," Max repeated quietly. "Not from anybody else."
"It still can come from you," Charles said.
Max paused, looking up at him. "Are you saying we should..." he began uncertainly.
"You want to tell the entire world that you love my sister and that she is having your baby? You have an Instagram account and a phone with an internet connection," Charles said drily. "Tell them the truth. Your truth."
Max opened his mouth and then closed it again. Charles had a point. It was obvious what the news was going to be now if people had seen Jos's interview.
But he wanted to be the one to tell the world. He wanted it to be on his terms. He wanted it to be public but on his public terms. Not his father's.
"Are you ever going to ask my sister to marry you?" Charles asked him suddenly.
The question caught him completely off guard. "...What?" He said blankly, stunned by the change of the conversation.
"You gave her a ring when you were both 18 that you both insisted was only a promise ring," Charles said drily. "Are you ever going to replace it with the real thing?"
He thought back to that ring that still sat on Colette's finger to this day. A simply gold band with a tiny heart-shaped diamond.
He had given it to her in 2016, after his very first Grand Prix win in Spain. He had gone out and bought it that very same day to be exact.
He had bought Victoira a handbag the first time he had scored his championship points...but the first time he had won...he had bought Colette that ring.
"Apparently the baby is only going to have your surname too, because you have an agreement," Charles continued. "Do I actually want to know what that agreement was?"
"We were 18. Both our father's would have probably killed us, if we came to them and told them that we were engaged," Max said with a sigh. The Leclerc's had always been supportive of their relationship but Hervè Leclerc had very much thought that both Colette and him were far too young to get married. 
Jos on the other hand...Max didn't even want to imagine that screaming fit.  "So I gave her that ring and we agreed that..."
"You agreed that..." Charles repeated slowly, silently urging him to continue.
Max let out a deep sigh and dragged a hand through his already messy hair, mussing it up even more. "We agreed that we didn't really need a piece of paper to tell us what we already knew," he said simply. "Colette and I had been together for 6 years at that point, we already knew and accepted that we were going to be together for the rest of our lives. It was just a matter of when. So we decided that we didn't need a damn piece of paper to know that we were committed to each other. We already knew that, without a doubt," Max said simply. "It was a promise ring. To love and to cherish, till death us do part. One day we would do it properly, but till then...that ring was a promise."
Charles stared at him. "Let me get this straight. You have been married to my sister for 10 years?" he asked him sharply.
Max winced. Okay. Put like that, it sounded kinda bad. "We never had the actual wedding," he said sheepishly. "We both know it wasn't necessary for us, so...we kinda just...never got around to it."
"I mean, I did ask your father for her hand in marriage when it was clear that he wasn't going to be there...when we eventually did it properly...but...for us that ring was… It was more than enough," Max said quietly. "I knew damn well that I would be with her for the rest of my life. She knew it. We both knew it. And that ring was a symbol between us that sealed the deal. We both knew that it was going to be for forever and always. It was a promise. A promise to always stay by each other’s side. No matter how badly things fell apart around us. No matter how much the world wanted to tear us to apart. We were going to stay together, come hell or high water. We didn't need a paper to prove that to us or the rest of the world," Max said firmly.
Charles stared at him for a couple of long moments, processing this. Max was well aware that, from an outside perspective, it might sound weird. That they had been so young, but so utterly certain that they were going to spend their lives together.
But he and Colette had been together for years. And he had seen how strongly they had bonded over the years, seen what they had been able to deal with as a team, as one, and how they had come through every single thing that the life had thrown at them together.
"You two are utterly ridiculous," Charles finally said drily. "You didn't get engaged because as far as you two were concerned you already got married years ago."
Max winced a little bit and couldn't really refute it. If he were to be honest, he'd have admit it did sound utterly ridiculous, when Charles spelled it out like that.
But that just...that was how badly they had known right from the very beginning that this was it for them. They didn't need a piece of paper to tell them what they already knew.
"I'll ask her properly," he promised Charles. "I already got the ring. But Colette doesn't want to overshadow Lorenzo and Charlotte and I knew that she wasn't going to want to have a big party while pregnant so I figured I would just wait."
Charles was slightly taken aback by his words, before he gave a small smile. "She'll definitely say yes, you know," he said, the corner of his eyes crinkling with affection.
Max smiled in return. His heart ached with the thought of her. "I hope so," he said quietly, feeling like there was a hole in his chest where his heart was supposed to be. "I really, really hope so."
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helianthus-tarot · 3 days ago
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FUTURE SPOUSE: Challenges to overcome or events to experience before meeting them
As written in the title. I posted the extended version on my Patreon which includes at what stage of life will you meet 👀❤️ There are also other 90+ readings on Patreon so definitely check it out, pick a card reading is posted every week plus extra mini pac every month! 🎉
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Instructions: Focus on the topic and ask yourself the question. Choose a number/picture that you feel the most drawn to or that you can’t stop looking at. Trust your intuition. May the message resonate. Let me know which pile you choose! Feedback is appreciated!
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PILE 1 
Challenges to overcome or events to experience in your life before meeting them: 2 of Swords, Wheel of Fortune, 7 of Pentacles, Knight of Swords, 8 of Cups. 
I think it’s got something to do with a change in your life path; things in your life moving in a direction that is unexpected, or that is different from what you initially visualised your life to be. There may be some external events that will be contributing to this development, that will be nudging you in this direction, or that will make you aware of this path. For some of you, it will involve a change in fortune; meaning that, if you take this new path that is being presented to you, you may feel like there’s a possibility that you can change your fortune. For others of you, this path will come to the surface the further you work in the direction that you think you are going. It’s like, let’s say you are currently working on X, but the more you work on X, the more Life directs you to Y path, or the more Y path becomes visible to you. X and Y may be related, they may be logical outcomes of each other. Like, pursuing a film major and wanting to work at X company, but then instead of going to X, you are presented a choice to go to Y organisation instead which will take you to a place you didn’t consider before. It’s that kind of event. 
Whatever it will be, you will have to make a decision, and this decision may cause some internal conflicts; you won’t know what you should choose. For many of you, this decision may involve you leaving something behind; this could be a place, an old idea of how you think your life should develop, it could be a project or skill you’ve been working on, or it could also be a relationship, if you’re in a relationship. For the latter, it feels like the typical event in films where one character has to break things off with their partner because they are asked to move, or they want to take on a project somewhere else and they can’t make the relationship work. This change of events may also highlight what isn’t working out in this relationship, path or place.  
You may also be asked to assertively solve your problems; the solutions may be presented to you by Life itself, and you may come to a standstill where you have to make that decision. In order to progress, in order to reap your hard work, you may need to be more assertive or direct in pursuing certain things, and this will lead to a change in fortune. So yeah, there will be introspection, inner conflicts, not knowing which decision to make—your heart and your mind will be pulled in different directions, or you’ll feel like there are many things that make it difficult for you to make a decision. But I think, at the same time, the answer will be clear to you. There may be a change of perspective, or Life may show you something which will make it clearer to you, and you may choose to move on from whatever it is in the past, in search for something better for you, in the direction of what you believe will help you progress and change your fortune. 
Advice for you is to stay centred in yourself, maintain that emotional balance and maturity, and be patient with yourself. I think the answer will be obvious, but the process of coming into the answer may require you to be confident in your ability to make decisions, it may require you to sit in your feelings and hear yourself out, it may require you to have a mature outlook instead of just following purely feelings or purely logic. For some of you, you may also need to believe that if you’re destined for a relationship, it’s not going to miss you. If you’re destined to be with someone, your relationship isn’t going to fail. There may need to be some reliance in the Universe with regard to your relationships, and about your emotional fulfilment. To remain strong in yourself, and trust that whatever wish or hope you send out to the Universe will not miss you even if you suddenly change your direction. I do feel like there’s a strong message that you will take this new path or that you will follow the direction that Life shows you; whether or not you’ll leave behind your current relationship (for those of you who are in a relationship). 
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! At what stage of life will you meet them? What will be going on in your life at that time? Will it happen when you are living your dreams, or when you get a new job, etc? Find out here! 😘❤️
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PILE 2 
Challenges to overcome or events to experience in your life before meeting them: The Lovers, 9 of Cups, 6 of Cups, The World, Wheel of Fortune. 
I think you will be pursuing your passion here, or dream, especially something that is related to your past or childhood passion. For some of you, you will do this just for fun; it’s just one of the things that you’ll do because it brings you enjoyment, and it makes you get closer to yourself. It feels like a desire to express the highest form of yourself, or to be in that joyful and dreamer energy; this dream, passion, path will feel achievable to you. For others of you, you may have a bigger goal; you will have imagined that pursuing your passion or doing this thing will eventually lead you to something bigger, like you could move to a bigger stage, you could go global or international—there's something with the external world, I’m talking about something big, something that will feel like destiny to you. You may have imagined this for yourself, and because of this, you’ll pursue whatever path this is.  
Regardless of what your goal will be, you will reach it and you will live that experience; it will feel expansive, it will feel lucky, it will feel like you’ve achieved your dream or wish, it will feel like this is one of your highest accomplishments—especially one that represents who you are, your talents, your soul. It will make you feel like you are on the track of self-actualisation, or you have done something that has a spiritual meaning to you. Something will reach an end (this is not negative) and reward will come, and you will enjoy it. So you will have done something here related to what I’ve just mentioned—possibly passion, wish, etc—and you will feel on top of the world, you will feel achieved and things in your life will feel like it’s moving in an interesting direction, a bit unpredictable but it will feel expansive. For some of you, you’ll meet your person either during that stage (after the end / achievement has just come to be) or after this stage entirely; but for others of you, the message will be in the next section. 
This may involve you meeting someone from your past, especially past lovers or partners. I’m not sure if you will get into a relationship with them again (some of you might, and they might be your future spouse). But either way, you will feel positive about this past encounter—or this past encounter will lead to you getting in touch with yourself and pursuing what brings you the highest enjoyment, which will eventually lead you to your person. Of course, like I mentioned before, for some of you, this is you reconnecting with your childhood memory, passion or dream, and you will do something about it that will lead to a sense of achievement and accumulation of experience, and it will feel lucky. This may also involve getting in touch with many people—there could be many emotional interactions or connections here—especially with the general public. For others of you, this may be talking about people online, people abroad, people from different countries. I think your life at this point may also make so much sense; there are a lot of circles in the cards, so it feels like something that started in the past and will reach the point where it connects back to where it begins—so it becomes whole. You will feel whole too. This will generally be a positive experience. 
Advice for you; keep working on yourself, your path, your skills or whatever it is that you’ve got your eye on. Constant learning, constant improvement (but with curiosity and light-heartedness of a child, instead of stress and jadedness of an adult) and constant movement towards what you feel called to—these will eventually lead you to your person. Your progress and movement do not have to be fast; they just have to be consistent. You are advised to hold on to that optimism, the belief that can you do amazing things. You are also advised to connect with the society, community, the world around you—what I meant by connect is not necessarily socialising; it’s more about your emotional connection with the world outside yourself. Connect that to the work that you are doing. For some of you, this may feel a bit exhausting sometimes, so take your breaks, but always come back to that hopefulness and that diligence, and put in the effort to reach the stars. 
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! At what stage of life will you meet them? What will be going on in your life at that time? Will it happen when you are living your dreams, or when you get a new job, etc? Find out here! 😘❤️
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PILE 3 
Challenges to overcome or events to experience in your life before meeting them: 7 of Pentacles Rx, Justice Rx, 3 of Swords Rx, 5 of Swords, The Fool. 
Yeah, this will be a challenge. For some of you, this challenge has been brewing under the surface, so it will come out and you will realise it or you will be made to realise it—you can’t pretend it’s not there anymore, or you can’t try to hold on to it anymore, you can’t try to prolong the heartache anymore. For others of you, certain events will be obvious but some events may be quite hidden, so at first you may not understand what’s truly going on (what forces are at play), or what you are supposed to do. And when you do realise it, you may try to suppress or hold off your emotional reaction to it, not sure why. It could be that you will try to hold on to something here, something you’ve been putting effort into or investing yourself in, something that you are emotionally attached to—anything like that. 
I feel like for many of you, this challenge will involve people. There may be misunderstandings, arguments, or disagreements, or people misjudging you / your intention and words. For a few of you, it may feel like bullying; I’m not sure if it is, but it may feel that way. It’s like within a friend group, something happens, and people take sides and you feel like you are standing alone. Something like that. For some of you, it may feel like you’re trying to manage multiple perspectives, or juggle different sides / opinions to the point that it’s hurting you. For others of you, it will be a battle of some kind, it could be related to law—I'm not seeing anything super big or significant though so this may be something like contract issue or small dispute. There will be a feeling of being treated unfairly though, like there will be unfairness somewhere, some kind of injustice and imbalance. You may also feel like you can’t freely express your hurt about the situation; because for some of you, the unfairness or injustice may be hidden. Like you will be able to feel it but it may not be addressed out in the open. Some of you will hurt some people’s feelings or you will get your feelings hurt when you defend yourself or argue your case. 
Whatever the event may be, it may put a halt to or make you have to abandon the previous thing that you’ve been working on. You have been building something here; this could be anything like a path, project, job, programme, skill, investment—something that you put effort into because it’s getting you somewhere, because you want to progress. But because of the conflict, you may not be able to continue, or your effort may feel like a waste. It’s probably not really a waste though. Whatever it will be, you will start anew; you may take a new path, and it will feel more liberating and exciting than whatever these restrained energies are. For others of you, it’s precisely because you will be taking a new path that this conflict happens, almost like your new path disturbs or goes against some people; in this case, I think you will still proceed with that new path, but the progress may experience some kind of delay, until you overcome this conflict, so this will be like, a blockage. You will end up learning from this experience.  
Advice for you; don’t be too accommodating or kind. King of Cups in reverse fell on top of Justice in reverse, and when I took it, I kinda accidentally dragged the Justice. So I think both cards are related in some way. I think one of the contributing factors to that imbalance may be your tendency to understand the other parties, to accommodate them, to want things to work—but this can only work well for you if they do the same thing. But if they don’t, it can become unbalanced, and you may be treated unfairly as a result. Don’t think too kindly of people; I mean, don’t start being suspicious of everyone, but if people have shown negative traits to you, don’t explain and give positive meanings to those traits to yourself. If you have a tendency to give yourself to others too much, maybe restrain that a bit more. You’ve got to support yourself first before you do it for other people.  
Some of you are a bit too nurturing that people take advantage of that. You may also have a strong sense of responsibility, so you give yourself too much sometimes. Remain centred in who you are, your beliefs and your values—regardless who will be questioning you or starting issues with you here. Be mature, don’t add to the fire, but have confidence that you know what you are doing and you are doing the best for yourself here. Don’t settle for less—for example, if you get involved in some kind of dispute, make sure you get your fair share / compensation because you deserve it. So there needs to be that feeling of ‘I deserve to ask for this, or to be treated this way, or to hold this position without being disturbed’, because it’s a basic thing to ask for.   
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! At what stage of life will you meet them? What will be going on in your life at that time? Will it happen when you are living your dreams, or when you get a new job, etc? Find out here! 😘❤️
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PILE 4 
Challenges to overcome in your life before meeting them: 4 of Pentacles, 6 of Wands, 10 of Swords, The World, Page of Cups (Ace of Pentacles). 
I feel like there will be several, and these things may be different from one another. You’ve got multiple energies here, and I asked how these things connected to one another, you got Ace of Pentacles. So it’s either one event leading to another event and to another event—or multiple things happening at the same time and they’ll just end up leading you somewhere new. It is also possible for some of you, that these events, although they may look different, all of them will be related to material opportunities. For example, in order to pursue those opportunities, you may experience these events. Or experiencing these events will eventually open up material and financial opportunities for you. 
Now what are the events. There will be something with regard to your home life, most likely your house, or your physical location. I feel like it’s been or it will feel quite difficult to live there, or something won’t be that satisfying, or you will feel like you’re storming through difficulties or inconveniences, or you’ve got to hold on to this place for whatever reason (like a lease) before you can move on to the next one. So it will feel that way. It won’t be that unpleasant, I mean, you will still have your stability but you may feel like you need to hold on or deal with some things.  
Now, another thing that you may experience is a victory; you will feel on top of the world. Some of you will feel achieved; some of you will feel celebrated, as in, people paying attention to you, people recognising you, people admiring or respecting you—this could be people abroad, or more than just one or two people. You may have been working on something, and that thing may reach an end and you will get the reward. This victory may come with some downsides for some of you. Since it will involve people, sometimes it may feel like a burden, or it may make you stressed out for some reason; some people will feel too passionately or emotional about what you are doing and they may start causing some scenes. This could be the reason for 10 of Swords.  
For others of you though, 10 of Swords is a separate matter. You will experience a mental and emotional hardship. It will be either something that has started long before that ending happens, or it will feel like you have got to move on—because things are ending and stressing you out and you can’t do anything about it anymore. It’s related to a heartache; I got 3 of Swords when I asked for a clarification. It may be related to a breakup, or a relationship ending. The odd thing is, I’m not getting a strong negative energy from 10 of Swords. Some of you may experience the heavier version of it, because this is a general reading, but for some of you, this may be like... an accumulation of stress that has been burdening you and so you will finally be pushed to the end of it, and realise that you can’t take it anymore, you don’t want to think or feel hurt about the same thing anymore. It can simply be mental or emotional exhaustion from having putting in a lot of work / effort.  
I did mention achievement; so whatever that will happen here, whether it’s positive or not, you will feel like a stage of your life is completing. It feels positive though. Some of you will be graduating, completing a program, a contract, project. Some of you may go abroad, or relocate; some of you will connect with people abroad, people from different countries, or simply people online through this achievement. You may also feel more connected to the world, and wiser through this experience, like you can see how the world works and what is connected to what—having a mature understanding of the world and the interconnectedness of it all. This could also be related to your passion, heart desires, creativity, or the part of you that is drawn to the arts—so you may be led to explore your idealism, your artistic inclination, a hobby that you’ve been wanting to explore because it speaks to your emotions and soul. It feels very soft and genuine and like opening a box containing parts of your soul as a child. It will feel joyful but in a quiet way; you will feel content with what you have at that time and what you want to do. I think this will be the light that you will follow, which will lead you to more material opportunities, which may lead you to your person.     
EXTENDED VERSION IS ON PATREON! At what stage of life will you meet them? What will be going on in your life at that time? Will it happen when you are living your dreams, or when you get a new job, etc? Find out here! 😘❤️
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bonbonly · 2 days ago
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𝐓𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧
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𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: heavily inspired by hannibal - after hearing tons of praise in regards to psychiatrist!max verstappen, you decide to test your luck and see what his true colors are 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: this is a dark fic! you have been warned! do not read if you're not comfortable with dark fics or any of the following in this fic: dubcon, drugging/aphrodisiac, knife play, cunnilingus, p in v, character death, reader is not a good person, blood/gore, slapping 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 5k 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: i want to give a special shoutout to @gokyrts because look at the abomination she's made me write, oh my god...
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"mr. verstappen's skills knows no bounds, but the only ones being bound under his spell are the countless patients he must've paid to spread his work as if it were a gospel," you echoed the words that you wrote onto your laptop, the rough draft being filled with small notes on the side of the document to remind you of any criticism of the man that you might've missed the first time. your fingers drummed against the keys of your laptop, your brows furrowed as you tried to find another sentence to add. to spite him. to inform him that he had to be a greedy, money hungry hoax. your friends always told you that his appointments were so relaxing, they were very helpful but you saw through his lies. you knew that something had to be up. working as a forensic scientist for the BAU, and secretly organizing a crime blog under a pseudonym, you've racked up enough credentials to be under verstappen's radar. perhaps he was the only one that knew about the blog, and it irked you.
he mentioned once after you stopped by his office to request his presence in the lab. direct orders from your boss, you stated, making it very clear with your tone that you didn't ask for it. you'd rather die than have him near the corpse, stealing all the credit that should rightfully go to you. the depths you went to find the real perpetrator days later was overshadowed by the single fact that verstappen had walked in and saw a petal of a rose just underneath the right calf of the corpse. a careless mistake, he told your boss, but one that could be easily tweaked if you had just scheduled an appointment with him so he could discuss parts of your childhood that you locked away, buried underneath your heels so that every time you stomped around, you imagined it to be the throat of your parents. you were told to accompany the psychiatrist back to his office, and when you dropped him off he merely smiled at you, his dutch accent infiltrating your ears, "you always miss the details, which is surprising because you never seem to do it under your blog, caroli- i mean, ms. (l/n)."
your blood ran cold at his words, and you stumbled out of his office with a hardened glare. he was reading your blog, and had somehow directed it to you. how did he know? there was no possible way for him to know. you worked for the fbi, for peter's sake, you knew how to tidy up evidence, to be careful when lurking through unclear waters. how did the bastard know about this? so, when you typed up the new article criticizing his work and suggesting that he might be behind the disappearance of a few colleagues of yours, you knew he would read it. with full confidence, you wanted him to read it and storm into your office ready to snap your neck.
but he never did. in fact, he never even looked at you at all the next day. or the day after. or the week after. he smiled at your associates, then locked himself in his room, welcoming in patients and booking appointments for the ones too timid to ask him for one. during a lunch break, you walked past his hallway and pressed your ear against his door to listen in to an appointment he had with your friend. the shattering of glass, a muffled scream, the sound of a bullet, metal cracking against her skull, any sound would do for you. you just needed one piece of evidence, but you received none. your friend walked out unscathed, a happy smile on her face as she greeted you back in the lab. your eyes cast down to your hands, a feeling of momentary guilt rising in your gut. you wanted to forge your hands into the fire for writing that article and painting him in a bad light; no favorable colors, no accurate brush strokes, a half-assed attempt where the paint bled through the canvas, seeping through the lines that you carefully concocted. it didn't make sense, you were so sure of it! all the victims -charles, lewis, carlos, daniel - your good friends who were missing had one thing in common: they had booked appointments with verstappen before their disappearance. they also were in contention to get a promotion, daniel had also been a psychiatrist, eagerly waiting for his new life to become the head of the department one day. it was a risky move, but you figured that if you pushed his buttons enough, he'd slip up. he'd expose himself, he'd make a mistake and then you'd have him trapped. the entire BAU would understand that they had a criminal right under their noses this entire time.
for this entire plan to succeed, you had to do a few things. your first plan was to write more articles on your secret blog. while the BAU was scratching their heads about how their confidential cases were being exposed so easily, you were dropping bombshell after bombshell on your blog, your finger always pointing to the psychiatrist that would now look at you across the room with a deadly glint in his eyes. his lips were always in a thin line, and occasionally you caught him smirking whenever you'd miss a detail during analysis. you were predictable to him, and you needed to find a way to defeat him at his own game. there was a reason as to why he hadn't exposed you yet, perhaps the lack of evidence but you realized that there was something about you that made him keep quiet. you had power over him, the thought of it made you giggle uncontrollably at your desk one day, spinning around your chair like a little school girl. the second plan was to use his own tricks against him, which meant finally noticing the smaller details, being smarter than the rest of the team and most importantly, being incredibly fast. whether it be responding to your boss, showing up to a meeting, scavenging a crime scene to find clues or evidence, you had to be first. this entire time the team thought of him as reliable because he was the first one present at all times. you had to change that, had to show the team that the tide was turning to your favor. you noticed the way he'd bite the inside of his cheek, the light illuminating from the side would highlight his cheekbones, the dent a shadow amongst the very little light on his face.
and then finally, the third part of your plan. book the appointment with him. this one hurt your ego the most, but in order to catch him you had to stoop down to his level. making him think that you were willing to open up to him should give him the opportunity to do the same with you, and once vulnerable you could easily coax the truth out of him. you sat across from him on a velvet chair, legs crossed as your eyes traveled around the room, memorizing the layout of his office and the objects that were on display.
"lots of cars i see here," you pointed towards one large model of an RB19 on his shelf. he buried his hands in his pockets, teetering on his toes as he let out a small chuckle,
"i like things that are fast. things that fly, speed through... run," the last word sent shivers down your spine, but you swallowed the bile that threatened to rise and forced a smile at him.
"care for a drink? i got some wine if you'd like?" he walked over to the stand of champagne bottles on display. the glass sparkled under the light, its contents swishing around with each step that he took closer. it reminded you of your guts wanting to spill out and as he grabbed the bottle's neck, you gulped and felt the ghost of his hands tightening around yours. with a cough, you shook your head but he rolled his shoulders in a way of disbelief and stalked over to you with a wine glass in his hand, "please, i think you need it. it's ok, it'll help you relax."
the liquid pooled down your throat, but you kept your eyes open in fear that he might take advantage of you like this. you couldn't let your guard down, not like this. you watched as he settles down on the couch directly across from you, his legs spread out giving you an ample view of what you assumed to be his cock fighting to be restrained in his pants but with a firm snap of his fingers, your eyes flicker up to his face and then you saw the smallest hint of a smile on his face. you hadn't seen one in weeks.
"so why exactly did you book this appointment?" he asked, tilting his head. his hands clasped together, the forefingers coming up to touch his lips. you shrugged in response, before quickly shaking your head. shit, you needed to follow along with the plan you made!
"just... just been having some bad nightmares about my past," you responded. the topic of your parents was sensitive, one that you kept hidden for many years after you graduated high school. their death was their own doing, but somehow you felt that you had a part in it. had the murderer been you, it would've made no difference because the guilt remained. the bystander was far worse than the actual criminal. your mother's head rolling down the hill as your father watched with a twisted back. you winced at the memories, the glass slipping from your hands, "fuck!"
max watched your reactions carefully. his eyes were drawn to the way your fingers hovered over the glass, almost afraid that it would grab you. you paid no mind to the wine stain, but the countless apologies that spilled from your lips was music to his ears. he wanted to hear you say them, but in a very different circumstance. he read every article you wrote, he noticed your shift in behavior around him. he was a psychiatrist; if you wanted to play mind games with him, he was already ten steps ahead. while guiding you to stand near the shelf of cars, he went over to his closet to grab the broom and dustpan. he took off his coat, rolling the sleeves of his shirt before crouching down to gently grab the large pieces of glass. he dragged his finger onto the pool of wine on the floor and licked a long stripe, "such a shame. i always hate seeing my appetite go to waste."
the appointment was cut short much to your chagrin. your carelessness, you thought to yourself, you just didn't understand why you kept making small mistakes like this. you had to train your mind to be better. you sighed and gave one last glance to the RB19 model when you noticed the initials D.R. in italics on the edge of the car. before you could step closer, you felt strong arms grab onto your shoulders, guiding you out the door, "ms. (l/n), i am so sorry about what happened here. i would love to hear more about your past, but perhaps in a setting that might not scare you too much. dinner at my house, maybe? would that be an offer you're willing to take up?"
you frowned at his words, wriggling away from his touch, "you invite all your patients to your house for dinner?"
"only the ones i believe i have a strong connection with," he responded, licking his lips as he leant against the doorframe. you tapped your heels a couple times, thinking the offer over. if you declined, you'd have to come back to his stupid office. but... but if you accepted, you'd be able to catch him in his environment - and while he had the advantage of home ground - he definitely had to be hiding things there.
"you mind if i bring a friend over?" you asked, and he smiled,
"the more the merrier, but i don't think we can talk about your history then."
"it's ok. we can talk about my life later."
"6:30 at my place, i'll send the address down to you shortly."
"oh, mr. verstappen, dinner is very lovely! did you make this all by yourself?" your friend asked while taking a bite of the lasagna. her words are tuned out as you shifted through your food with a fork. the darkness of the dining room did little to ease any of your fears. you had walked in feeling confident, ready to tackle the monster down with your bare hands, but his kindness. his professionalism. his unwavering stare. they all made you feel as if you were being suffocated. you didn't have much energy in you to continue with the fake conversations. excusing yourself to use the bathroom to then explore his mansion would be too cliche, he'd be waiting for you to do it anyway. being too predictable would bore him, which would mean the chances of you being killed would be higher.
"not liking the food, ms. (l/n)?" max asked, his eyes flickering down to the food he cooked being tossed around like a bird amongst hyenas.
"no, i'm just... not very hungry, unfortunately," you responded, grabbing the wine to drink.
"a bite wouldn't hurt. just one bite, i spent hours cooking for tonight," he chuckled, and your friend kicked your leg under the table, her eyes narrowing at you to take a bite. you could already hear what she was saying in her mind. the poor man went out of his way for dinner and here you are, being a rude guest! with a very reluctant sigh, you grab hold of the fork and let your teeth sink onto the lasagna, the flavor melting into your tastebuds as you let out a slow hum of approval. it tasted nice, very nice actually. so you took another bite, and then another. her appetite's back, your friend laughed and max nodded his head, smiling at you.
but when dessert rolled in, you felt uneasy. your insides felt empty, as if craving for something that you couldn't quite place. your thighs clenched together as your gripped onto the arms of the chair. you couldn't make out whatever max was saying. he was asking you if you were alright, but his eyes asked a different question. you hadn't noticed how big his eyes were before, or the fact that his pupils were so dilated. how did you miss that detail before? was he always like this? you quickly excused yourself, running to the bathroom but each brush of your thigh under the thigh made you choke on air, your mind hazy. upon locking yourself inside, you immediately collapsed onto the ground, your head in your hands. you felt strong pair of hands around your waist, groping at your tits that spilled out of your dress - or was it be ripped off of you? your pussy bare against the cold dampness of the room, your mouth propped open with fingers as the sweet taste of an apple made its way. your jaw was sore at how your teeth delved into the fruit and stood rooted there as your arms were bound above your head. was that the woody scent of a candle, or the fireplace that was underneath you? where was that burning sensation? under you... or inside you? your legs were being spread apart, the itchy rope curling around your limbs to make sure you wouldn't move. you opened your eyes lazily to see a figure with dirty blonde hair at the end of the table, his shiny teeth visible amongst the evil grin you saw.
"my favorite meal... all to myself." he whispered, letting his tongue rake over your glistening folds. your strangled moans are swallowed by the apple in your mouth, your body aching for more as his nose nudges your clit. his teeth nip at your labia, tongue invading your womanhood as you can't do anything but scream out loud, drooling from the corners of your mouth. his tongue rolls your clit around, lapping at any juice that seeps from your cunt. he wants to ensure your taste is on his tongue forever. the sweetest dessert that one would ask for. his fingers spread your mound to get a good look at his masterpiece and he lets his saliva stalk down to your pussy before harshly rubbing your clit. when you finally look past your tits to see who this figure was: your heart stopped at the sight of max staring down at you with a predatory look.
you screamed as you woke up in your bed, cold sweat dripping down your forehead. you glanced down to your hands, your feet, your clothes that covered your body. you looked around your room, unsure as to how you were back in your bedroom. it felt real... was it real? you couldn't tell. you pulled the waistband of your panties down, check to see if you were still a wet mess. nothing. laying back down on your bed, you placed a hand on your heaving chest and ran your free hand down your face. what just happened? what was going on? you had to find out, you had to get to the bottom of this.
which meant having to go back to his house. on guard, and once again with someone. you decided to bring a colleague that you despised, but it would be better to sacrifice her than your friend.
you sat across the dining table, and despite how predictable it was, you excused yourself to the bathroom, keeping note as to how his eyes focused on your ass. never miss the details, you thought to yourself. you headed to the bathroom, opening the door to turn the lights on before shutting the door. with a few fake thuds just outside the bathroom door, you took your heels off and carefully took them with you around the staircase. with the layout of the house, the dining room wouldn't give clear access to the left side of the kitchen. which meant that the pantry could be entered carefully without him noticing. your colleague was busy entertaining him about her vacation in milan, her loud voice thunderous enough to rattle the house... and enough to mask the creaking of the pantry door as you slipped inside. it was cold, almost like entering the arctic as you pulled out a tiny flashlight to guide you through the foreign place. the meat hung forlornly from the hooks, the torse of a pig on display. you frowned at the ink patterns on the meat, and you hesitantly turned it around. you'd seen these marks before somewhere. a vacation trip with your friends that you planned one evening. someone had dragged you into the pool as a prank and when you floated to the surface, spluttering out the chlorine water, your hands found the shoulders of a man inked with tattoos on his back. it was lewis. your flashlight slipped out of your hands and clattered onto the metal railings.
"fuck, fuck, fuck!" you hissed, scrambling to grab the small material. you were delighted that your suspicions were correct, that this entire time you were right about verstappen. but you needed to get out. you could see the shadow of footsteps underneath the pantry door. there was a back entrance to the pantry, and you stumbled towards it. from the corner of your eye you noticed a bottle of liquid and you uncapped it with your teeth, chugging the liquid down. you really needed some wine to calm your nerves down at the moment. letting the bottle roll back onto the metal table, you ran out the door into the open woods. you'd have to go around the path to get back to your car in the front of the house. the more minutes you stood to think about a plan, the more time was being wasted. from the distance, you could hear the back entrance of his house being opened and you whined out loud, pushing your feet to continue running. you didn't want to die, not like this... no, not now, not ever!
and yet with each step that you took, you felt a strong pain inside you. that pain you felt when you had dinner for the first time at his house. you were craving for something, you didn't know. was it his tongue again? no, what? why were you thinking about that awful nightmare? you remembered the outline of his cock during your first appointment, oh it looked delectable. you could've gotten on your knees then and sucked him as payment for the appointment! as your mind was reeling with uncontrolled desire, your knees buckled and your leg caught onto a root from a tree. crashing forward with a loud groan, you struggled to get back up on your feet when you felt the underside of a boot press gently against your neck, pushing your face onto the ground.
"i told you before i liked things that run. at this point, you're just teasing me," a familiar dutch voice rang from above you. the boot nudged you over onto your back, causing you to hold back a whimper at the sensation. you were sensitive to everything, your skin on fire as he trailed his foot down your body and right below your heat. right below where your desire was burning.
"y-you killed them. i was right, you killed them all," you weakly laughed, "i was right this entire fucking time."
"round of applause for you, ms. (l/n), oh wait..." he paused, looking around the empty woods before he glanced down to you, "no one's here." he rubbed the toe-box of his boot against your clothed cunt, enjoying the way your back arched, squealing at the way your clit was being dragged along your damp panties.
"tsk tsk tsk," he circled to stand right in front of you between your legs, "you always missed the details. you could've made it, you know? you could've gotten to your car and made it back to your house, schatje. but it's your carelessness... what did you drink before you came out here?"
"w-w-wine?" you responded, tilting your head. you let out another moan as the boot dug deeper onto your mound.
"wine mixed into the aphrodisiac. which would've been my last resort if you had properly rescheduled the appointment that we never finished. details, ms. (l/n), always look at the details," he knelt down, letting his hand replace his boot. the warmth of his fingers made you whine, begging him to end your suffering. your mind was purely empty - save the thought of having him satisfy your primal needs. he bunched up your panties, tugging them up to see your pussy coat the fabric with more of your juices, "fuck... you're so wet. it must hurt doesn't it? you wish you had someone to help you, schat?"
"yes, yes, yes please... please!" you cried, bucking your hips up. max laughed, seeing the way your pussy was grinding against your panties. he ripped them off of you, throwing them over his shoulder as he picked you up into his arms, carrying you as if you were his bride.
"i think a change of environment will put you in your place." he mumbled, and while you didn't catch onto it at first, when he tossed you onto the metal table in his pantry, you felt fear course through your body. "such a nice suit i had on today, and now you made me ruin it."
he slips off his coat and vest, rolling the sleeves of his shirt that hugged his biceps. he searched around the pantry for a while before grabbing an apron, tying it around his slim waist. he gazed up at you as his chin tucked into his neck and he let out a dry laugh, "you know... if you had just stuck to your job, this wouldn't have been a problem. always wanting to be the hero, when you're the villain yourself."
he grabbed the butcher knife, tossing it in the air a couple times, "i used to keep him with a bunch of other knives, all neatly organized just like i love. had to use him so often these days that he gets his own special spot. what do you think? he's beautiful isn't he?" he holds the knife up to your hooded eyes, and when you don't respond, he uses the butt of the utensil to slap your face, beckoning you to respond.
"i-it's nice," you mumbled, and he nods his appreciatively, letting the sharp edge of the object gently kiss your skin before he cut away at your dress and bra, exposing all of you to him. he saw the lump in your throat when you swallowed, and he brought the edge of the knife to your neck, watching you crane around to avoid the sharp edge. he tossed the knife in the air once again, which caused you to shriek out loud in fear that it'll slice you but he caught it and tapped the butt of the knife on your lips.
"suck," he commanded, and still clouded by the aphrodisiac, you do what he asked and twirled your tongue around the tip before opening your mouth wider and letting it fully devour your throat. you caught your reflection in the metal, and you can't even believe how blinded you must be. the details, the details, the details. the body of daniel hanging above you, staring at you with closed eyes and parted lips should have you screaming as you rolled your eyes back, but instead you're feeling yourself growing wetter, eager to please max. the weapon hits your teeth as max trailed your saliva down the valley of your tits, over your navel and to your cunt that's been so desperate this entire time. he pursed his lips as if he was deep in thought and then brought his free hand to spread your legs wider, shoving the butt of the knife into you. the feeling of being stretched out, of finally being filled - even if only a little - had your back escape the confines of the metal table, your tits out in the air as you're sobbing in joy. max saw the way you're mewling, body contorting in pleasure and he left your cunt empty once again before slamming the butcher knife right beside your head. your breath hitched in your throat, the fear once again settling but it made your heart race in excitement. there was a small thrill present, maybe he was right earlier. you were the villain all along. you were worse than him. he took off the apron, unbuckling his belt and he snickered,
"you could've grabbed the knife and stabbed me by now, but you didn't... too desperate to get fucked, isn't that right, liefje?"
he let his cock spring free from the confines that tormented him since the day he saw you at the BAU. head held high, a haughty gleam in your eyes. the arrogance as you talked down to him, acted as if you were superior. he was waiting all along for this moment. his cock slid against your folds and when he pushed in, the tears that flowed from your eyes combined with the guttural moan made him smile. something was missing though, something that could make this so much more better for him. and as he began to thrust, he glanced up to see another corpse from a previous victim hanging to the side. a cruel idea formed in his mind and he grinned down at you,
"schatje, i don't think i could bring myself to hurt you... not when you're being such a good slut for me," he cooed, "but... but a man can't help but imagine..."
he grabbed hold of the butcher knife, slicing the corpse and letting the blood splatter onto the top half of your body. it trickled onto the table beneath you, the tiled floor now the canvas of a new twisted desire. he laughed out loud at the sight of half of your face covered in blood, and he brought the coated knife to your neck, continuing to thrust his aching cock into you as you screamed out loud in a horrid mix of fear and desire. you could feel your cunt clamp onto his cock, so close to cumming as his thrusts became more erratic.
"i knew you'd like this... you came all this way here to see if you could understand me. schat, but do you even know who you are?" he questioned, letting the edge of the knife kiss your neck. and as you came undone with a scream, your vision blurring at the intensity, you realized he was right all along. the details, you missed all the details. your parents death wasn't because of some man that had swerved the car late at night. it was you. you swung the sledgehammer at the car while they were driving down the highway, drunk out of your mind out of anguish from all the abuse you faced as a child. the man stopped to see the commotion and you sent his body flying down the hill. you'd done it, you were a murderer. you were twisted, you were... you were as bad as him. you glanced up to see max still bullying your cunt, pushing you to another orgasm before you could process the toll your body was taking in the process.
"your scent always drove me wild," he whispered, leaning down to bite your nipple, "fuck, schatje... i'll give you a deal." he lifted his head slightly to meet your gaze, "we can work together, you know? with your skill and this cunt of yours, i could keep you around. no harm to you at all, unless of course you'd like it."
"t-the blog... no, no, i can't... i'm better than you. i'm not you, i'm not fucked up like - oh fuck, don't stop!" your argument melts away with each snap of his hips,
"you have no other choice here. there's two ways this can go. you keep coming to my office, be my personal slut, trained completely to take my cock and i'll let you live... with the added benefit of working and helping me. and if you don't," the butcher knife digs a bit deeper into your neck, "i think you understand what i mean, right schatje?"
you nod your head, throwing your head back as you let out another visceral scream as your second orgasm rips through your body. he captures your lips in a bruising kiss, murmuring praises at how perfect you'd be, how you were always destined for this, no matter how much your ego told you differently.
and yet as you laid beside him on his bed that night, well-cleaned and taken care of as his new trophy, you secretly uploaded the photos of his pantry to your blog and slipped out of his house, past your dead colleague in the living room. he'd come after you, that was for sure. but he liked to hunt, and you've learned to run.
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splonk-fox · 2 days ago
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So, this was pointed out to me by someone on Discord and I have not been able to stop thinking about it.
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In the first scene showing Chosen and Dark's rampage on the internet in Flashback, Chosen is seen destroying an article titled "The most dangerous cities in America". This seems like an inconspicuous detail on paper, but really think about what this is implying.
Chosen's first instinct upon going to this site is destroying an article talking about dangerous cities, almost like he wants to destroy anything that is considered dangerous. Now think about the next shot.
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Chosen and Dark are raiding Angry Birds, and what is Chosen shooting fire at? The structure housing the pigs, keep in mind that they are the bad guys in the Angry Birds series.
These may seem small but really think about what this says for Chosen's character. That he is.
Averse to dangerous places, hence why he destroyed the article talking about dangerous cities.
During their internet rampage, Chosen was directing his attacks towards the "bad guys"
Now what does this tell us? Well it tells us that even at the beginning, Chosen was directing his attacks towards things that are generally considered bad. He is trying to eliminate the bad things that exist across the internet.
Even from the very beginning, before Chosen began to rethink his actions, his nature to protect and be safe have always been at the forefront of his mind. When you consider that preventing bad things from existing is in his nature, it makes a lot more sense why he would be against destroying Stickpage and Newgrounds. Because they aren't protecting anyone. Chosen's first instinct is to protect and that's not what they're doing.
Chosen was never a bad guy, he just didn't realize it yet and likely assumed he was made for destruction because that was the first thing he did upon being created.
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youhavethesun · 2 days ago
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saw a tiktok on pinterest (because I don’t have tiktok lol) about how annoyed someone was that Rory had given up all her hopes and dreams ‘because of one comment from a man’. and I know this was meant as a joke but honestly I wonder if this is how a lot of people view this plot line. I’ve seen so many people talking about Rory’s ‘downfall’ and how she was so unable to handle criticism/that she fell apart from a single comment etc.. and I just honestly can’t see how people continue to view it this way.
I think there are honestly a lot of factors that influenced Rory’s breakdown after Mitchum’s comment, but first of all I quickly want to say that (I know this is controversial but I genuinely do not care) I don’t think her leaving Yale was a bad thing!!! It was treated as this ultimate sin, (maybe this is for another post idk) but honestly I think Rory made the right decision. I don’t think the right decision was obviously her giving in to the lifestyle Emily wanted for her/joining the dar and so on, but actually taking a break from formal education I think could have been positive, all through season 4 we see how much of a toll college is taking on Rory, and I think taking a year out if she knew she was going back and using that year to rest and learn more about herself could have been really beneficial.
anyway sorry for the tangent, okay so the first thing is that a lot of people seem to view Rory’s conversation with Mitchum as a single interaction which caused her ‘downfall’, and everything was a domino effect from then on, instead of looking at it as the straw that broke the camels back. like I said, Rory was not in a good place at Yale even during s4, she had a terrible breakdown when she was slipping in her grades, and the impact of having to drop a single class was huge for her, she was desperately anxious about disappointing especially her grandfather’s expectations, but she was also at risk of at least somewhat disappointing all her immediate family. In season 2 (in my beloved car scene in teach me tonight) we can see hints of it too! Jess is just chatting casually when he says he didn’t expect her to dream about becoming an overseas correspondent, but this immediately rattles Rory, with direct dialogue being:
“well, it's not a little too rough for me. I hope it's not a little too rough for me, I've been talking about this forever. I mean, I don't even know what I would do if –-“
and this is in response to a comment from a friend.
the prospect of failing at her goal but also very importantly what Rory has ‘talked about forever’ is incredibly frightening. I think it’s so interesting that she doesn’t say ‘I’ve wanted this forever’, but rather implies that the expectations of those who have watched her grow up, who have heard her talk about this for so long, would be shattered because she has shared this with them. so much of Rory as a character is someone who is afraid to disappoint in every way possible, I think that is such a core element of her personality, and as the child prodigy who was (to some extent) raised to achieve what lorelai couldn’t, the pressure she is under not to disappoint is massive.
anyway, back to Mitchum. I think honestly to some degree it could have been anyone to criticise Rory’s capability and she would be considerably affected, seen not just when talking to Jess but even in season 1 after getting lower grades when she transferred to Chilton - Rory immediately questions whether she is even good enough to be at private school, whether she could just be disappointing those around her if she stays.
The fact that it’s Mitchum Huntzberger who says she ‘doesn’t have it’ in my opinion is kind of just the icing on the cake. Whether or not Rory had even taken the internship I think the pressure of it all would have led to a larger breakdown at some point or other, this was really just the final straw for what Rory could take at the time. Imagine one of the most successful people in the world in your chosen field telling you that everything you’ve worked for isn’t enough, that in three short words every expectation you’ve set for yourself (and more importantly every expectation everyone around you has held you accountable to) has been torn apart. Imagine believing you had let down everyone who had sacrificed something for you, who had put their faith in you, and tell me you could just bounce back from that.
Anyway the tiktok was not that serious but my thoughts just kind of spun out from there so if you read all of this I love you <3 and also I love you later season Rory you’re flawed and you’re lovely<33
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flower-boi16 · 2 days ago
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A Reason For Why Blitzo May Love Stolas
Blitzo has a fear of being alone. That is something that firmly is established in Truth Seekers' acid trip sequence, and as Moxxie says here:
" I believe your subconscious is trying to tell you that you simply cannot fathom proper intimacy, but... also crave it as well. It's rather unfortunate, sir, considering it's often how you treat those who stand by you... such as myself"
Blitzo wants closeness and intimacy. He wants a close reletionship and is afraid of lossing anymore people around him due to his past truama and the fact he already screwed over all his past reletionships with Fizz, Barbie, and Verosika.
He wants someone to be close to him, someone to give any kind of close reletionship, he doesn't want to end up alone...even if he has to be chained to that person to be close to them.
The hallucination that Truth Seeker shows that Blitzo is drawn to Stolas but feels chained to him as well, that he's shackled to Stolas due to the deal, while Moxxie says that line I showed earlier about Blitzo not being able to fathom proper intimacy but also craving it as well.
Meaning that, until the show gives any other reason, Blitzo fell in love with Stolas due to his past truama and fears of being alone, so he can cling onto the close reletionship that he has and not be alone, to have some form of intimacy even if he is frequently dehumanized and treated as sex object by Stolas and made uncomfortable around him constantly and even gets coerced by him.
Despite that all, he still has an attacthment to Stolas because he's one of the few things to a close relationship he has now, because he doesn't want to end up alone. Even Stolas is abusing him....he still wants to stay...because he doesn't want to end up alone.
So basically, Blitzo fell in an unhealthly love with Stolas due to his craving of wanting a real relationship born from his truama. It's a reason but...it's not a particularly healthy one, nor do I think it's a reason that the show wants you to think.
The healthy reason the show wants you to believe is that Stolas offers Blitzo real, genuine affection...but we've never seen that dynamic. Sure, Stolas does love Blitz, but most of their interactions throughout the first season are of Stolas making sexual remarks to Blitzo and Blitz being uncomfortable with it, there is no healthy reason for why Blitz would fall in love with someone who treats him that way even if it was unintional.
The show provides so little reason to believe why Blitz has feelings for Stolas that interpretations that suggest that Blitz just gained Stockholm syndrome are honestly not that far-fetched. If you go into later episodes with this interpretation I just layed out in mind then a lot of the scenes regarding Blitz showing affection to Stolas get painted in a far more negative and unhealthly light.
There is direct evidince for this interpretation based on what Blitz's character is established to be and what the imagery Truth Seekers presents to us is. So Blitzo's love for Stolas is born out of an desire that came from his truama, and based on how Stolas treats Blitz...it's not a healthly one.
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Random Headcanons (18+)
BTTS!Donatello x reader
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A/N: My Back To The Sewers boys need some more attention, so I’m just gonna add this💜
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All characters are aged up.
Warnings: Sex as a distraction, riding, mentioning of soft sex, mentioning of rough sex, sex on the internet.
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After Donnie and his brothers returned from the future, things were not how they used to be between the two of you. One would be forgiven to think that it was because a whole year had passed since you last saw each other, but it didn’t take long for anybody to realise it was because of what had happened to Splinter. He was too busy blaming himself, doing everything in his power to find a way to bring his father and sensei back from the deep web, rarely leaving his new lab.
It took quite some time before you were able to get him out of the lab, helping him to his bedroom so he could relax for once since he came home. It was here that you and Donnie had your first time since he came home, with you riding him, bouncing up and down his member, allowing him to moan, whimper and groan beneath you, unwinding at the pleasure you provided him.
You became a much stabling factor in Donnie’s life (just like you had been before he and his brothers went to 2105), as he did everything he could, so he and his brothers could bring their father home, you made sure to get Donnie out of his lab every night, so he at least could get some sleep. Part of that was to help Donnie get his mind off things, and sort of distract him.
These distractions actually proved quite beneficial to both of you, as neither of you really knew what direction any of them could go in. One night it could lead to soft love making, and the next it could lead to hard and rough sex, almost so loud that it woke Donnie’s brothers up.
But sometimes, you didn’t even manage to get to the bedroom, before Donnie would jump on you. It wasn’t often, but sometimes it did happen, that Donnie found himself so frustrated from his perceived lack of progress, and then he just needed an outlet. That outlet then becoming you, moaning and whimpering beneath him, either on the floor of the lab, the table or his chair, begging him to let you cum.
Did the internet also suddenly take a much larger role in you and Donnie’s sex life, with Donnie’s new and much stronger access to the internet, becoming a way for the two of you to experiment in new and much different ways? Indeed it did. And let’s just say that you and Donnie can now say that you have had actual sex on the internet. Not mutual masturbation, but actual sex.
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mulderscully · 14 hours ago
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can i be honest? i feel like people need to get realistic about the timeline for the rwrb sequel. they announced the sequel really early because they already had plans to make one while filming and because people kept asking, and there was no press tour for the first movie. that was the press tour. it wasn't a promise that there would be another movie immediately. both matthew and casey said that they last thing they want to do is put out a rushed project and this is a good thing. sequels have a reputation of being bad, they need to get it right. as of now (jan 2025) all that we know is that they said recently that they are almost done writing the script. the scripts then need to be revised and edited, then the movie goes into pre-production. matthew is also set to direct a remake of the body guard which still hasn't been cast. casey is writing another book. nick may or may not (both are fine) want to de-bulk after masters of the universe to look in character as henry. taylor has said he has projects in the works he can't talk about yet. the rest of the casts schedule also has to be taken into consideration, not just nick and/or taylor. they probably are not going to film in 2025, and if they do it'll be late in the year. after filming (which takes 2/3 months) they will then go into post production and THEN we'll eventually get a release date. i would not be suprised if we don't see this movie until late 2026 or even 2027. and that's okay. remember, once it starts it's the beginning of the end again. enjoy this anticipatory phase and knowing there is more to come, read fic and support creators in the fandom. the time will pass anyway.
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venus-ratt · 2 days ago
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Can we take a moment to appreciate how genuinely kind Pomni is?
Most interpretations of her often focus more on the anxious side of her personality, forgetting this part of her character.
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In ep 4 she notices that Gangle isn’t doing ok and does her best to help, despite having only like one interaction with her up to that point.
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Some people found this specific line rude, but I actually think it’s just meant as a meta-joke about the show’s formula, where Pomni has a heart-to-heart with a specific character at some point in previous episodes.
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There’s also the fact that, at least to me, comforting others doesn’t come naturally to her. In this scene, and even back in episode 2, she sounds unsure of herself, taking long pauses like she’s trying to find the right words. She’s awkward, but you can tell she really means well. It’s clear she genuinely wants to help and is doing her best. I also think she doesn’t see herself as someone qualified to give advice, which is probably why she suggests Gangle talk to Ragatha instead.
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Then there’s this scene. If she had only comforted Gangle earlier because she happened to find her crying, she wouldn’t have gone out of her way to do this. She doesn’t push Gangle to open up, she knows that won't help. She just sees her struggling and chooses to help, showing through her actions that she cares. Honestly, it’s not a stretch to say Pomni might be the reason Gangle is still there, but you probably already know that.
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It’s also worth mentioning that Gangle wasn’t exactly nice to Pomni earlier. She had at least some idea of how important Gummigoo was to Pomni (she saw her reaction to his death) but still got upset with her for trying to talk to him. Of course, that wasn’t gangle being mean for the sake of being mean. She was afraid of losing the authority she had finally achieved after being walked all over for so long. I think Pomni realized it wasn’t personal and that her reaction was related to Gangle’s own issues, which is why she didn't brought up the interaction later.
That’s something I’ve noticed about Pomni, she’s really compassionate and doesn’t hold grudges.
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You can also see this in episode 3. Kinger was the reason she got dragged into the scariest adventure after explicitly saying she can't handle horror well. But she never blamed him for it. She was clearly terrified and miserable the whole time, but she didn't get mad at Kinger for putting her in that situation. Instead, she redirected her frustration at Caine and the adventure itself. The closest she came to blaming Kinger was just not denying he was the reason they ended up there when he pointed it out.
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Honestly, Pomni being so nice was such a pleasant surprise. Before episode 2, I thought her character would go in a completely different direction. I’m so glad I was wrong.
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utilitycaster · 3 days ago
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So something you’ve mentioned in a previous ask about how some of the players have decided to play characters that are more go-with-the-flow or designed to specifically take a step back, and I’m curious if you think that the fact that those players (Travis, Marisha, Liam) taking on a sort of sideline role, has also sort of affected the party’s decisiveness and by extension of the campaign because of it? Not to say that they shouldn’t try that different kinds of characters because they should and they have the liberty to try it out for themselves, but with no one else to really step up, it leaves the party in kind of a mess.
From previous campaigns, Travis and Liam have always been hard drivers of decisions and direction, in part of the characters they play having clear goals or strong personalities in knowing what they want (Marisha I think this applies to more for c2 since it was something Keyleth had to grow into as a leader over the course of c1). In contrast, Laura and Ashley tend to be players who tends to be indecisive in the face of a decision because they don’t want to make the wrong one. This has been a through line since Laura as far back as c1 because I distinctly remember a Talks Machina episode where Laura talked about how for a moment she thought she made the “wrong” choice with Saundor, but then later on came to the conclusion that she made the “right” one.
With Laura and Ashley playing characters that are spotlighted so heavily in the plot of this campaign, this indecision weighs as heavily because they play characters are the hard drivers while the others (outside of Ashton) are reactive rather than proactive or for Oyrm’s case, specifically and deliberately by Orym’s own choice, more quiet snd sidelined. I think Travis has had Chetney to try and take center stage to push a couple times throughout the campaign, and I think Travis did it with Grog too in c1 when the party took too long to come to a conclusion and he would decide something to get the party moving, but there’s a lot of empty time and space on that stage in c3 where in previous campaigns someone would pretty consistently take that spotlight.
I think some players are generally more inclined than others to lead or be in the driver’s seat and some players who don’t want that position majority of the time, and that’s perfectly okay. It’s just a matter of experimenting with what works and what doesn’t, and I think for BH, it doesn’t. And I don’t think it should be a requirement from some players to play a specific role all the time, but I think it’s important to at least acknowledge it and comprise, allowing players to play to their stengths and cover others’ weaknesses to make the table and story flow and work
oh definitely. I think you said this well, and I think Keyleth actually did do a lot of pushing the plot in C1 specifically because she was in game terrified of doing the wrong thing and explored that. Keyleth was, even before they officially began dating, someone whose calls Vax trusted, and she in turn supported him, and that led to (for example) Vox Machina choosing not to ally with the Clasp (which a number of party members supported or were neutral towards) and going after Raishan immediately following Thordak, despite the risk. Keyleth was terrified of making the wrong decision, but crucially, she had a very clear idea of what she wanted to do - she just didn't always believe what she wanted was good, and that conflict is what tripped her up. She was extremely willing to go to the mat over such topics as, for example, pragmatic alliances with dubious people (Raishan); it's just that sometimes this resulted in her being overruled and having to put up with said alliance, and struggling with that.
I don't think it's bad to be a player who wants to go with the flow and explore personal relationships without being a major decision maker. I tend towards being a decisive player, but I do not think it's the only way to be. But this does become an issue when the DM assigns you the role of Decider, and it becomes more of an issue when other players, quite reasonably, had chosen to step back. And I will personally admit - I've repeatedly tried to play laid-back/chaotic characters in D&D and it simply fucking fails. I lack the patience to fuck around endlessly. This is also, frankly, why I don't personally dump intelligence: playing as a character who is not curious and constantly trying to learn about the world simply isn't fun for me. If I were at a table that was going through endless debates with zero progress or resolution like Bells Hells, I have to admit I'd have long since said "hey. Is this...fun for anyone? Because I hate it." and I do not presume to know what the CR Cast thinks of it, and I really believe that "it's our game" means "don't make that presumption" but I can say it's been pretty widely panned among viewers, and it is valid to say "you can do what makes you happy in your game but wow this sucks as a story." And so yes the fact that the people who usually cut that kind of discussion short have stepped back, and the people who are reluctant to cut that type of discussion short are the ones who ultimately must make the decisions is, undeniably, a factor here.
Honestly, I and others have called this the third character dip or similar things and I think it's fair to say that a lot of cast members are, or were, in this campaign, either playing to their weak spot or avoiding a party-carrying personal strength. Players like Liam, Travis, or Marisha (or, to give a few other well-known examples, Emily Axford, Aabria Iyengar, and Lou Wilson) are in my experience less common in the same way that DMs are less common than players. It's more work, more responsibility, and people are more likely to blame you if something goes wrong. And I get that it can feel like you are steamrolling quieter players, and I do think talk away from the game table is important to ensure you aren't, but much of the time, when I've talked to people, they've been like "no, I would like to play someone who is a huge dumbass who can go off and goof around [paraphrased, and I mean this affectionately; I am thinking specifically of my brother's sweet summer INT 8 half-orc monk-barbarian] and I appreciate that you are filling a role that I would not pesonally find fun" (I also specifically like playing healers/support and DON'T like playing burst damage).
I do want to note, and I did this elsewhere: this hesitancy is nowhere to be found when I've seen Ashley and Laura (and various other players who are at times less bold - Sam being an obvious example) play in shorter form works. Arlo Black is a standout in Candela; both Tris and Emhira were fantastic. This is part of why I think an extended short-form only break would be good after this campaign ends. I do think it is ultimately a flaw of the campaign for forcing Fearne and Imogen into these positions when I do not think it's what the players really wanted for the characters (again, speculative); but like, they are in those positions, and the time to have said something was a while ago. I mean if that's the theme - that it's unfair and unkind you shouldn't have to be the one who makes the choice - that's fine, but the thematically apt thing to do is to make the choice anyway, with intent.
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dazzle-expandism · 3 days ago
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It’s honestly disheartening to see so much hate directed at Liko from Pokémon Horizons simply because she’s the new protagonist. Just because Liko is stepping into a new chapter of the Pokémon world doesn't mean she deserves any of the cruelty she’s been subjected to. We’ve had years of Ash, and while change can be tough, it’s important to remember that this is a new generation of fans, and Liko is her own character with her unique journey.
Let’s be clear: sending hateful messages, especially to a voice actor who is just doing their job, is beyond immature. The voice actor is a person, too, and they deserve respect. No one deserves to hear things like "Go f**k yourself" over a fictional character, let alone someone who has worked hard to bring that character to life.
Instead of attacking, how about we give Liko a chance? Every character in Pokémon has contributed to its legacy, and it's unfair to treat someone with disrespect just because they don’t fit into the mold of the past. Liko deserves to be celebrated for her individuality and the new adventures she brings to the series.
Let's show kindness, maturity, and respect for all the hard work that goes into making a beloved franchise like Pokémon thrive for future generations.
It just pisses me off how immature these Liko haters are to making art of her getting killed. You need to grow up and learn how to accept new protagonists. Just imagine being Liko's voice actor, waking up, checking your phone to see dms from Liko haters telling you to kill yourself. Absolutely NOBODY wants that in their dms.
You guys would do anything to get Ash back even to the point where you send Liko's voice actor DEATH THREATS. I can't stand these haters. They're everywhere. And I don't mean to call out anyone for making posts of Liko getting killed like **AHEM** -R- for example. But you can't hate a character for just existing.
In all honesty, you should stop hating her for being the new Pokémon protagonist.
💚Sending love to Minori Suzuki💚
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ponkydraws · 2 days ago
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Johnlock rant pt 2
You thought I was only gonna write Sherlock’s perspective? No. Anyway. John.
Spoilers + suggestive themes ahead.
You have been warned.
John is introduced as a character who has trust issues and is wary of the world, partially because of his PTSD. He is a retired soldier. He has seen it all. But as Mycroft remarks, “you’re not haunted by the war. You miss it.”
There is a very obvious difference in John’s reaction to Sherlock’s deduction and Mycroft’s deduction. He’s star struck when Sherlock does it, but when Mycroft does the same thing he glares at him and asks “who the hell are you?” Yes, the circumstances of the scenes obviously affect his reactions, but even with a dead woman on the ground in front of him he can’t help but praise Sherlock’s intellect, so clearly discomfort isn’t much of a factor. You could argue that John is being defensive on account of being scared, but Mycroft outwardly tells John “you don’t seem very afraid” and John simply says “you don’t seem very frightening”.
And to add onto this, Mycroft clearly has suspicions about their relationship and outwardly says so. John simply says “I barely know him, I met him…yesterday” and Mycroft says “Mm, and since yesterday you’ve moved in with him and now you’re solving crimes together. Might we expect a happy announcement by the end of the week?” John doesn’t respond nor acknowledge the question, but asks “who are you?”. Mycroft simply assumes that the man Sherlock is living with is a romantic and/or sexual partner, meaning he’s not surprised at all by the idea that Sherlock would be in a relationship with a man.
When John asks what he wants he says that he wants information about Sherlock, but quickly adds “nothing indiscreet. Nothing you’d feel…uncomfortable with. Just tell me what he’s up to.” Which does sound like a polite way of saying that he doesn’t want nor need to know about what he gets up to behind closed doors (presumably with John, since he says nothing that JOHN would be uncomfortable with telling, not Sherlock), he just wants to check on how his brother is doing. The definition for indiscreet also is “having, showing, or proceeding from too great a readiness to reveal things that should remain private or secret” so I think it speaks for itself what he’s implying. He’s just an older brother who wants to make sure his younger brother is okay, but makes sure to inform John that he’s not interested in hearing about Sherlock’s sex life.
Other than that, Mycroft seems to genuinely like and respect John. He bids him farewell when leaving, asks him about his life, even if it’s just “what’s it like living with Sherlock?” And Mycroft clearly knows how much John means to Sherlock. They have this semi-brother in law situation going on
John has on multiple occasions risked his own life to save Sherlock’s. When Moriarty is threatening Sherlock, he throws himself at Moriarty and tells Sherlock to run. This is despite the knowledge that this would get himself killed & “if your sniper pulls that trigger, Mr Moriarty, then we both go up” and Moriarty mainly shows amusement, but still tells Sherlock “isn’t he sweet? I can tell why you like having him around.”
In the final problem, John agrees quite quickly that Sherlock should shoot him instead of Mycroft and takes it with stride. He does not fight it. He accepts that he has to die in order for Sherlock to live.
In the very first episode - I repeat - the very first episode, John shoots a man to death because Sherlock was in danger. What’s so interesting about this whole scene is that Sherlock was not under direct threat, he was choosing to take one of the pills but John shot the man anyway.
- Sherlock also realizes halfway through his deduction to the police that John is the one who shot the cabbie, and immediately takes back what he said about the murderer to keep John out of trouble. He does not care about John killing a man, he’s more worried about John’s well being. He even compliments him on the aim and the two of them walk away from the crime scene giggling like 12 year old girls.
John dates a string of women throughout the show although they always end up in some kind of bad ending. As stated in the previous rant, John’s girlfriends are sick of being less important than Sherlock. And if you’re really keen on details (which, you’re watching Sherlock, of course you are) you’ll find that one of the women he dates wears a coat that resembles Sherlock’s, and she pulls her collar up in the same way Sherlock does. Subconscious attraction? Neither does he actually find a long term relationship until he believes that Sherlock is DEAD, and it takes him 2 whole years to even try to move on with his life (but only needed 2 months for Mary’s passing?)
Now, John is a jealous and protective man. Even more outwardly so than Sherlock is. Mycroft even comments on it when they meet for the very first time - “you are VERY loyal, VERY quickly.” he notes as he makes a face that implies even he is surprised about how sure John is of his decision. When faced with a naked Irene Adler and Sherlock in the same room, he actively interrupts their conversation to get in the way. He passively aggressively tells Irene to put some clothes on and then remains skeptical of her for the entire episode. When they’re talking another time he also interrupts and making an unamused joke about baby names.
He displays a sense of protective behavior when he meets Irene again after Sherlock’s alleged “heartbreak” and gets outright mad at her for treating him like that. He even shouts at her despite Irene not showing any aggressive behavior “WHAT DO YOU NORMALLY SAY? YOU’VE TEXTED HIM A LOT”. Speaking of the texts from Irene, John not only is the only one to point out the text notification noise but also admits to actively counting the amount of messages Sherlock has received, which, yeah a handful would’ve been acceptable but this man kept track of 57 NOTIFICATIONS on a phone that’s not his. (This isn’t really a real point but someone joked about how Sherlock asks John “what noise?” When John addresses the moaning text notifications despite knowing very well what noise he’s talking about, as if he’s expecting him to repeat it or something. Not really relevant but it made me laugh)
In this conversation with Irene, he admits to having no clue what Sherlock’s sexuality is, quote: “who the hell knows about Sherlock Holmes, but, for the record, if anyone out there still cares, I’m not actually gay”. Irene responds with “well I am. Look at us both”. Which earns a defeated scoff from John. Irene asks John if he’s jealous about her texting Sherlock so much, John does not answer the question but tells her “we’re not a couple” to which Irene immediately says “yes you are” without even looking up at him. John does not fight back, but makes a vague nod and leaves it at that.
John repeatedly tells various characters that he is not gay - but only that. He never says that he’s not attracted to men, he’s not attracted to Sherlock or anything like that. No. He just says he’s not gay. Bisexuality is a thing. He could very well be a closeted bisexual who struggles a little with accepting it. It’s possible that his lesbian sister wasn’t treated with respect by the family and that has caused some inner turmoil, but that’s a fan theory we’re not going to get into right now
John also seems to be the only one thinking about how gay they look in certain situations. After saving John’s life, John says “I’m glad nobody saw that. You…ripping my clothes off in a darkened swimming pool, people might talk.” As if he didn’t almost just literally explode. A near death experience leaving him weak in the knees and he’s thinking about how people will think he and Sherlock were getting it on in a darkened swimming pool? Okay, buddy. This also goes for when they’re running from the police handcuffed to each other and Sherlock tells John “take my hand!” To which John says “now they’ll definitely talk.” I would argue that if you are constantly thinking about how gay certain things you do with your best friend are and how people will talk, maybe people aren’t the ones who should reevaluate themselves, maybe you are, seeing as you’re having gay thoughts even when fearing for your own life.
Oh and we haven’t even gotten into the pool scene. I don’t know if it was accidental but when Sherlock undoes John’s jacket to get rid of the bombs, he gets on his knees in front of John - who leans his head backwards as Sherlock looks up at him. Then afterward he’s so visibly weak in the knees he has to sit down to even talk. All of this is filmed from behind Sherlock. They could’ve filmed it in any other way. But that’s what they chose? Okay. Totally doesn’t remind me of anything else or anything.
When Sherlock is pretending to be dating Janine, John seems so genuinely out of it. He watches Sherlock and Janine make out with widened eyes, before turning around to stare at the wall with a disgusted and horrified expression on his face. He can’t even pretend to not be shocked, he barely manages to keep himself together and is outwardly very awkward when talking to them. Janine offers that they should have dinner together sometime soon and John just goes “yeah, great. Dinner. Yeah.” With a halfassed smile on his face as if he can’t bring himself to even mimic regular conversation. Once Janine has left, Sherlock starts talking to John about a case. John is not listening. When Sherlock stops talking John just goes “…you have a girlfriend?” And Sherlock seems surprised and confused by the question, since he had already moved on from that conversation. Sherlock confirms that yes, he does have a girlfriend. John still can’t properly process the information and asks again “right, yeah, but…you…you are in a relationship?” Despite already being told the answer.
When Sherlock proposes to Janine, John looks shocked. But it morphs into something else. He looks at Sherlock with a horrified expression, his eyebrows furrowed together in disbelief and his mouth hanging slightly open. This is not the face of someone who is shocked in a good way. It’s the face of someone who just got a metaphorical gut punch. The camera even shifts focus from the ring to John staring at it with a hardened expression, then to staring at Sherlock with a shocked and mildly pleading look.
He also punches an officer in the face for calling Sherlock a “weirdo”. When Sherlock hands him an itemized list of Mary’s enemies he doesn’t even look twice but one vague insult to Sherlock and he gives the man a bloody nose and gets arrested as well - Sherlock taunts him a little with his “joining me?” Comment but seems genuinely a little impressed when he finds out why John is also being taken into custody.
When getting drunk together (which, Sherlock was the only one who John spent his bachelor party with), they get wasted and start to play a game of Who Am I? They’re weirdly gentle and soft with each other, making playful jabs and breaking down into laughter at each other’s statements. Sherlock, who has a note on his forehead that says “Sherlock Holmes”, asks John “am I important?” To which John responds “uh, to some people” and smiles. Sherlock asks “do people like me?” And John says “uh, no, they don’t. You tend to rub them up the wrong way.” And then rests his head on his hand while he lovingly gazes at Sherlock and chuckles at his own statement with a look of love that looks like one you’d give a lover when they’re being cute. John asks Sherlock “am I pretty?” And then follows up with “this” and points to the note on his forehead. Basically this is John asking if he’s pretty, then having to specify that he meant the person Sherlock picked, and not actually himself, as if he was expecting Sherlock to call him pretty without understanding the question was meant for the game. Sherlock does not answer the question, but rather goes on a drunken mini rant about how beauty is a social construct based on culture and John interrupts him saying “yeah, but, am I a pretty lady?”
Sherlock remains quiet, squints at John’s note and then admits “I have no idea who you’re supposed to be”. John rolls his eyes and tells him “you chose the name!” But isn’t genuinely upset, just amused. With his drunken stumbling, he also loses his balance when shifting his sitting position and grabs onto Sherlock’s leg for support. Sherlock doesn’t react. The two of them later fall asleep next to each other on the bottom of the stairs, babbling about nonsense. Mind you, John couldn’t sleep comfortably in a warm bed next to Mary, but had no trouble finding peace when laying down on the fucking stairs next to Sherlock.
During this same evening, John has to interfere and physically drag Sherlock away from a drunk fight at the pub. Same goes for when Sherlock is drugged by Irene, where John comes into the room and promptly grabs ahold of Sherlock and pushes him back onto the bed telling him “I’ll be in the next room if you need me” Sherlock groggily replies with “why would I need you?” And John simply says “no reason” and shuts the door.
Oh also John and Sherlock got locked up together in the same drunk tank. How cute is that?
And oh my god the fucking sexual tension between these two makes me feel like I’m interrupting something intimate. Even in the first episode, Sherlock asks John if he’d seen a lot of violent death. John goes “yeah, plenty. Far too much. For a lifetime.” And when Sherlock then asks “would you like to see some more?” John replies with a breathless “oh god, yes.” The same tone can be detected in the 1800s episode an exchange between Sherlock and John, where John tells Sherlock “ah, ah, ah, Holmes, you have misdiagnosed”. Sherlock lowly says “then correct me, doctor” and gives him such obvious “fuck me” eyes that I felt embarrassed watching the scene with my dad. The episode also includes John asking about Sherlock’s libido - no - I am not joking. And here’s the kicker. None of this is real, it’s all happening inside of Sherlock’s subconscious. So my question is, why does Sherlock’s subconscious make up scenes where his platonic best friend is asking him about certain urges and speaking to him with a flirty tone?
John also has a habit of letting his eyes drop to Sherlock’s lips when talking to him, or straight up licking his lips when Sherlock reveals he’s single (in the pilot). They look into each other’s eyes for just a littleeee too long for it to feel friendly.
This is just me being a little bit of an annoying fan who misinterprets everything but Eurus asks Sherlock to play the violin for her. He does, but she stops him saying “no, not Bach. Play you.” And Sherlock starts playing another tune. She blurts out “oh! Have you had sex?” And Sherlock simply goes “why do you ask?” Again, not answering the question. Obviously that question is a bit strange to ask your older brother when you haven’t even seen him since the two of you were little kids and he doesn’t remember you exist, but, once again he doesn’t feel the need to confirm or deny. I see a lot of people saying this is a hint to Irene, and it probably is, but I personally find it more likely he’d hypothetically find time to get into…adult contact…with someone he lives with. But that’s sidetracking. Anyway.
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wisteria-lodge · 8 hours ago
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About the gender in hp thing: I know JKR wrote the books wanting the patriarchy to have minimal impact on the world but even through a couple of the metas you wrote you can see that that’s not the case. In your character crying post there’s a clear implication that showing that kind of emotion is a weakness but also that it is not masculine. Equating strength with masculinity is foundational for cultures with strong patriarchies, and this idea infests every other aspect of their lives. Idk because of that and many other reasons I have a very hard time of writing the wizarding world as anything other than a patriarchy
This is a watsonian analysis vs doylist analysis issue.
I 100% do think that JKR went out of her way to really, really downplay the importance of gender in her worldbuilding - and this contributes a lot to the specific feel of the world. You could genderflip, idk. Neville. Snape. Draco. Hermione. McGonagall. and almost no plot elements or character dynamics would change. (Maybe James would bully Severus slightly differently? Idk. He honestly might not.)
Compare HP to something like His Dark Materials, another British fantasy series released at the same time, marketed to the same demographic... in which gender politics are REALLY important. Lyra conforming or not conforming to specific gender norms hugely impacts the way a lot of other characters treat her. So much of Mrs. Coulter's character has to do with how she's navigated the back ways and side avenues into power, because the patriarchy that runs *that* world is extremely explicit and plot relevant, and there's a lot she just can't do.
Now is JKR *good* at writing a gender-blind world? Not really no. So she's stripped out the importance of gender in a fairly surface way, while leaving evidence of the foundations intact. Everyone's a het couple, women take the husband's last name, Molly and Petunia are at home while their husbands work and there's no inverse of that situation, Fleur's father walks her down the aisle at her wedding, it's important that Hermione be able to tame her hair when she wants to, but for Harry it doesn't matter...
There is ALSO the narrative voice poking through and putting its own spin on everything. This is where we start getting judgment (for example) directed both at girls who are too feminine, and at girls who aren't feminine enough. Or sexual assault not really "sticking" if it's directed at boys. We don't have a character talking, in-universe, about how it's wrong for a woman not to want children. We just have a book where the only women who don't have kids (or take care of kids) are villains. Same thing with masculinity = strength = no crying. That's something the narrative framing / bias of the author brings to the table, but it's kept out of the mechanics of the magical world. I guess you could say Harry and Draco equate crying/fainting with weakness (but not explicitly anti-masculinity)... but then Lupin goes out of his way to separate 'fainting' from 'weakness' anyway.
Interestingly, gender is much more baked into the muggle worldbuilding. (Part of why I think leaving that aspect out of the wizarding world was a deliberate choice.) Smeltings is an all-boys school, so is St Brutus.' Dudley teases Harry about his "boyfriend" Cedric, Vernon sizes up Arthur and Mad-Eye by how masculine they are. At the beginning of Book 4, Dudley's diet is this very gendered conflict between Vernon and Petunia, where Vernon doesn't want a "little nancy boy for a son" - and that is one of the only truly gendered insults in the whole series. "Crybaby" almost counts... but the Slytherins tease Hermione for crying too, so idk. They tend to go for pretty gender-neutral insults, like "poor" "unimportant parents" "looks like a chipmunk" ... etc.
Like... I'm trying to imagine a scene were Lucius lays into Draco for not being masculine enough, and I can't. I think that in a canon-compliant fic, a scene like that would feel odd. The conflict would need to be framed more like a "you disgrace the name of Malfoy with your weakness" or "never tell anyone outside the family what you're thinking" or "your believe yourself to be more intelligent than you truly are." Not "you need to man up."
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wyvernspirit · 3 days ago
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So after watching all of Jentry Chau Vs The Underworld in the past 2 days I've quite a bit to say
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This show needed to be two seasons long, I feel half my critiques would probably not exist if it got the runtime it deserved
Kit had the most interesting character arc and was done the most dirty of everyone by the lack of runtime later in the season and also the characters around him??? Can everyone stop treating Kit like shit for two seconds please??
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I at multiple points went "God this feels like arcane levels of Greek tragedy" so it has that going for it
If it has ended as a season 1 on episode 9 (I think? The episode where she's out on the field and Cheng revived his daughter then the portals are opened) it could have been a really solid set up for a season 2, but unfortunately the next final episodes feel incredibly jam-packed and rushed with no room to breathe
The music and fight scenes were arguably the best part of the show, there was some really interesting "camera" work too
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I didn't like how Michael basically played with 3 girls feelings for the whole show, particularly sorry to girl from the last episode who doesn't even get a name as far as I can tell
(also the way he went "and Kit did you love him too??" as some kind of snap back to Jentry like HE DIDNT LITERALLY JUST DIE MICHAEL CAN YOU STFU FOR TWO SECONDS NOT THE TIME)
Michael kinda just sucked? Like I wanted to like him but he's very meh to me and I'm sorry but the reveal of him actually being really bad at the flute just, threw me off completely especially because instruments are expensive!! He didn't buy it on a whim, the whole thing is he's supposed to have this deep passion for music but like it's not really reflected at all?? There's not even any conversations between him and Jentry about music outside band tryouts
And him having powers I guess could have been set up for a season 2 but we end this season really conclusively? All the plot threads and character arcs wrapped up. Like if anything I could see a spin off with him maybe but- like I don't want one, I just could see that happening
Actually to go back a paragraph for a second, that's something the show does a few times where it drops these very sudden interests of the characters and pretends they had them all along?? Like Jentry and baton twirling, like come on wouldn't it have made more sense if she got sought out by the school dance team or something?? Or just have her main spirit fighting weapon be a baton!! Show her having genuine interest in that aspect of spirit fighting and then have it reflect later in school? Like why did these girls see a video of Jentry dancing and go "Hey she could probably baton twirl!" that makes no sense!
The animation was really great! More than that even, I love the art style and art direction this show has, it really gave me some major inspiration! I want to draw some fanart really badly!!
Okay this a major IN MY OPINION, low-key I think the show might have been more interesting if it was just set in Seoul for the whole time, I preferred Jentrys friends there, I much preferred the environments and the colours the art direction had in the setting of Seoul
I didn't really care for Texas in the show and It made the feelings of her later questioning if she should return or not be hollow to me the viewer, because I was like OF COURSE SHE SHOULD
Stella is a character I have complicated feelings on! I really did not care for the minuet of Michael's introduction at school her getting weighed down as just "the girlfriend" character and how Jentry wasn't allowed form a meaningful connection to her until after Michael and her broke up, hell Stella basically gets forgotten by the plot until the last 4ish episodes, and IN THOSE she's a REALLY fun and strong character! I love how she started learning seals and was such a a big part of them winning that final fight at the school, which frankly I don't think she gets enough credit for
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And while I find her blushing at Jentrys other friend cute it just makes me sigh because now I realize the show totally could have just done a "Fuck the boys" Jentry x Stella ship and I would have been totally down
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Actually low-key I think my ideal is Kit and their Girlfriend Jentry and Jentrys Girlfriend Stella ((and I guess maybe Stella's boyfriend Michael if he got written better, but meh don't expect me to include him in the polycule if I ever write Fics/draw art for this show))
Also speaking of Kit god I would love them to be genderfluid or I guess it to be acknowledged? As queer and not just, because their a skin walker. Like you can read them that way because of them being a skin walker demon but like if it was acknowledged in the show after making Jentry's skin he experimented a little with how he looked as Kit and his sense of fashion and style!!
Idk I would have loved it, I have some strong feelings on how this show had hints of queerness but never actually acknowledged that queerness besides I guess Jentrys fake parents being like "So do you have a boyfriend?? ..or a girlfriend??" Which I mean, I guess, diversity win the cat spirits pretending to be your dead parents don't care if your gay!
I was very invested in the mysteries of the Chau family for the whole run I just wish that they had time to breathe, we went from one revelation to the next and each one hit just that little bit less because there was no down time given between them.
Okay overall though, it's going to be rotating in my mind like a microwave for the next two weeks I can tell
I don't know if it's strong enough to stick around as a major fixation but maybe a minor one where I occasionally get drawn back over the characters who had so much potential to me
I'd say a solid like 8/10
Yeah I know I just did all that whining and complaining
But I did genuinely enjoy most of the viewing experience and the ideas behind it
It was good, I think other people should give it a try, it deserves a lot more love and attention for sure
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hollowed-theory-hall · 5 hours ago
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What are your thoughts on the possibility of Petunia redeeming herself or atoning for her abuse of Harry? This is more ramblings and musing then coherent ask, sorry.
You mentioned in a previous post that while she might not love him, she is concerned for her nephew’s safety - as well as that her emotions towards Harry are quite complex (similarly to her emotions towards and relationship with Lily, post-magic revelation).
There are many fics where Petunia does eventually break the cycle of abuse she and Vernon perpetuate on Harry (but usually this is the result of either divorcing Vernon or her husband outright dying), but I’m kind of curious as to what you think in your analysis of her character.
Petunia is a tough nut to crack for me when it comes to fics where she is redeemed.
At the very least, the extreme neglect and enforced silence that Harry is raised in just…it’s terrible when you look at it more deeply than the early books intend.
Which is made worse still by later on, when she swings a frying pan at his head (Chamber of Secrets, I think?).
In the first books, I get that as the target audience was young kids, not much gravitas was placed in Harry’s treatment in the hands of the Dursley’s - they were the bad family he escaped into the magical world from, the anti-thesis to the Weasley family later, meant to seem more caricature and buffoonish.
If that frying pan had hit Harry, though? Depending on how hard Petunia swung it, no matter that she was concerned for Dudley (after Harry didn’t even use magic, just pretended to), that could have killed him.
We know Dudley beat Harry quite often with his friends, and Vernon at the very least threatened to do so (and from some of Harry’s lines, likely went through with said threats at times), but little about Petunia’s abuse of Harry is mentioned except in the very early books - her shaving his hair except for his bangs for example, leaving him to go to school mortified - so there’s no indication that she regularly threatened him physically over the emotional abuse, but still.
Not to mention the potential for neglect/abuse that Petunia herself went through, Lily being their parent’s favored child over her, how that in turn also affected her relationship with her sister, and then how that is turned on to Harry…
Petunia’s character, and redemption/atonement for Harry’s abuse is such an interesting concept.
Personally, I was never interested in a Petunia redemption arc. I think she's just as bad, if not worse than Vernon. So I'm going to have to disagree with you.
It's not that Petunia's sitting there feeling bad about how she and Vernon treat Harry and wish she could stop it — she doesn't. It's very clear throughout the books that she isn't remorseful at all.
Her feelings about Harry are complex because Harry is Lily's son. And as bitter and jealous as Petunia is, I think, she used to love her sister. Used to even be protective of her. So, deep down, I don't think she wants Harry dead or seriously hurt (to her standard), but at the same time, she feels justified in hurting him and treating him as subhuman.
See, Vernon truly does hate wizards. He fears magic, he loves normalcy, and he despises the "freaks" that essentially represent everything he hates. He's straightforward and completely honest in his approach.
The reason I sometimes consider Petunia worse, is becouse she isn't honest, she's a fucking hypocrite.
She wanted to be a witch. She wanted to be special and go to wizard school like Lily. She was jealous of Lily that she got to do magic and go to Hogwarts.
Petunia started calling wizards freaks and latched onto normalcy as a way to cope with not being special. I mean, she was told that magic exists, that there's a whole special world of magic out there, but that she isn't special enough to become part of it.
So young Petunia coped by going in the opposite direction. She became as normal as can be. Started claiming anyone special was a "freak" even when deep down she fucking knows that if she got a chance she'd leave and go to Hogwarts in a heartbeat. That deep down she wants to be special.
She transferred that jealousness and bitterness, then toward the wizarding world as a whole onto Harry personally, which is so unfair. Like, I find it disgusting, I find it disgusting how righteous she feels treating him the way they do. She is very similar to Snape in this regard (projecting her problems with Harry's parent onto Harry), just without any of the redeeming qualities since she isn't even all that smart, and she wouldn't give a shit if all her neighbors died one day (Snape would). And Snape was better to Harry than Petunia, let's be real, being an ass to a kid is not the same as starving a kid and locking him in a cupboard.
But I do want to point out, that she doesn't have the excuse of a cycle of abuse (I'm saying excuse because that's what it is. Tragic backstory can be used to explain characters' actions but it doesn't absolve them) becouse Petunia wasn't abused or particularly neglected. We have no indication she was, and I think it's more likey she was treated well.
We're told their parents loved having a witch in the house by Petunia in PS, but when we see Snape's memories, apparently their parents urged a pre-Hogwarts Lily not to do magic. They feared it until it was explained to them. Petunia is biased in what she says. Because while they were supportive of Lily once they understood, I don't believe they ever mistreated Petunia, and I don't think she is meant to be read as neglected.
I mean, Lily wasn't even home most of the year, Petunia was getting all of their parents' attention year-round, and during the breaks, they probably dotted on Lily because they hadn't seen her in months. This isn't neglect or abuse. This is Petunia being a petulant child who didn't get to be showered in attention all the time because her parents wanted to hear from the daughter they only got to see, like, 3 months a year.
I don't think either Lily or Petunia were abused or neglected, and I find it somewhat silly to try and justify Petunia by giving her a tragic backstory when the books make her reasons to hate Harry very clear. These being jealousy and pettiness.
So, I'm not interested in a redemption arc or atonement arc for Petunia or Vernon for that matter. I think neither of them deserves it and the only atonement I'd be interested in for them is a prison sentence for child abuse and neglect.
Yes, Petunia may not beat Harry physically as often as Vernon or Dudley, but she lets them. She watched him be chased by Marge's dog and laughed. She approved of Vernon's and Dudley's treatment of Harry because if she didn't, she wouldn't have let it happen. She stopped Vernon from throwing Harry out of the house when Dumbledore sent a threatening letter to her in OotP; if she cared to stop the abuse she didn't actively participate in herself, she had the power to do so, but didn't. Becouse she thought Harry deserved it. She mistreated him just as much. Looking at him with disgust and scorn and calling him a freak is abuse. Starving and locking him up is abuse. She isn't any better than Vernon.
The only Dursley I can see redeemed is Dudley. He started his journey in the books (btw, in that scene, Petunia thinks Dudley is "too sweet" for telling Harry he isn't a waste of space) and he actually was a child, like Harry. He did what his parents did like every child does. But he shows signs of improvement after Harry saves him from the dementors. He realizes his parents are full of shit.
So, yeah, Dudley is the only Dursley I'm interested in a redemption for. Petunia and Vernon deserve a prison sentence.
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annihilatorz · 2 days ago
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When you say Andre was a misogynist prick, where do you get this from? I'm not trying to argue lol, I just don't remember him saying anything sexist in the film. but I also haven't watched it in a while. I think I remember him calling people bitches, though I don't think that's sexist. I am just interested in your POV!
ANDRE KRIEGMAN AND MISOGYNY
This is all a really over the top and unnecessary analysis of Andre as a character, understand that it’s all my personal perspective of him. Sorry for the confusion on that one post lol.
And yes you are right, Andre doesn’t directly make misogynistic remarks, BUT he has internalised misogyny.
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In my eyes Andre comes across as internally misogynistic or at the very least, arrogantly dismissive of women.
Andre and vulnerability:
Andre mentions being “tormented” by people at school, this tells us others see him as vulnerable and weak, an easy target.
We see in the tapes that feelings of vulnerability (a stereotypical feminine feeling) seems to drive Andre to perpetuate some aggression, he gets riled up and seems to feel the need to convince himself that he is “going to be God”, he is not weak.
He has a strong discomfort with vulnerability and a near obsession with being seen as a God, a dictator, a man of power are all signs of his misogynistic tendencies.
Rachael and Cal’s conversation:
Rachael’s conversation with Cal in the graveyard is where she mentioned that she sees Andre as “the leader” of the two guys which I assume is likely because of the tough, “hyper masculine” persona he projects.
His aggression or dismissiveness toward people that Rachael tells Cal about may serve as a possible defence mechanism against the traits he fears most, emotional expression or perceived weakness.
I will keep repeating it.
Andre does not want to be weak.
He is sick of being seen weak and being treated as weak.
This attitude definitely stems from a form of self-loathing tied to his internal belief that traits of emotional (and physical) weakness are undesirable or inferior.
Rachael describes Andre as “offbeat” and “strange,” and her discomfort around him may stem from, yes, the internalised misogyny.
Jc Penney shirt:
I wanted to add this as a way to show Andre’s masculinity was definitely challenged, giving an explanation for his internalised misogyny.
The slur is used weaponise and undermine a person’s masculinity, this has clearly deeply affected him as he still remembers it and is still riled up about it.
This could have been a starting point for when he started to build up his macho facade.
She also notes his anger and hatred, which could easily be interpreted as having misogynistic undertones, particularly when directed at her.
I also want to bring this up:
Cal’s joke about filming “girls’ asses,” for Andre while funny, is lowkey a deeper issue of objectification, suggesting that Andre (and perhaps Cal as well) reduces women to mere objects of desire.
It’s worth remembering that Andre’s character is partially inspired by Eric Harris, a very misogynistic person 👍
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