#bc she really seemed to know how to work around obstacles and more often than not getting what she wanted

[ducavalentinos]

In the 3rd season of Borgia Faith & Fear, Della Rovere tells Lucrezia "of all the Borgias, I think you are the most dangerous", I find it funny bc I don't remember Lucrezia was being especially threatening to DR there. Do you think this phrase could be applied to Lucrezia? In which cases could she (always seen as tragic & passive)have been more "dangerous" or influential than the almighty Rodrigo and the energetic Cesare? Perhaps in things related to diplomacy and behind-the-scenes maneuvering?

Oh, this scene! it was a good one. And no, she wasn’t being especially threatening to DR there, not in an obvious, male way, which tends to be more overt, but she was kinda being it in a female way, which tends to be more covert, and which can be more dangerous at times because you don’t see it coming, and that I believe, was the point of the scene. DR clearly saw the threat in Rodrigo and Cesare, but he never saw it in Lucrezia, until that moment. That was when he realized that behind her mask of beauty, charm and piety, laid an very intelligent and diplomatic woman, who knew how to use her feminine charms to get what she wanted, and that indeed made her more dangerous than her male relatives, who in Fontana’s version, are uncharacteristically unstable, obvious in their plans, and openly and stupidly confrontational with their enemies. In this world, Della Rovere was used to that, but he wasn’t used to the tactics Lucrezia was employing there, so he was definitely like: hmmm, I need to be careful here, more than ever before djsdjdsjdsj. And yes, anon, I do think this phrase could be applied to historical Lucrezia, despite the insistence of Borgian scholars to keep fallaciously reducing her to a tragic, passive figure, who was only a victim of "patriarchy" and "the terrible, ambitious men" in her family, looool. Much like it happens with Cesare, Lucrezia's historical material, her actions, do not support the majority of the claims made about her and the overall presentation of her historical figure, on the contrary, it constantly heavily points towards different conclusions about her character, her life, and most of all: her family dynamics with her beloved father and brothers. I think it must be understood that Lucrezia seems to have had a preference for the incognito way of doing politics, and to not treat it as a lesser form of doing politics, because in truth, it is very wise, also. She was as intelligent, politically cunning, ambitious and pragmatic as her family, and other noblewomen of her times, but she does not seem to have wanted to broadcast that to the world, she doesn't seem to have had any desire to let others perceive her as a political player, perhaps because she was aware it brought more disadvantages than advantages, man or woman, once you were perceived by others as a political threat, it made you an easy target for violence, and it added an extra difficulty in making political moves without being noticed, (and the element of suprise, of secrecy, is one of the key factors of successsful policies or of achieving a certain political goal) Lucrezia witnessed that first hand, with Juan being murdered, Rodrigo and Cesare having various murder attempts to their person over the years they were in power, and with their every move constantly being watched, their words and actions scrutinized by their contemporaries. Lucrezia had no need for that, so the lack of records about her private life (even Gregorovius in the end admits nothing is known about her private life while she was in Rome) and of her political side does look like it was partly like her own doing. A deliberate effort into making herself as unnoticeable as possible where political affairs were concerned, simultaneously always taking great care in her appearance in public, from her dressings, to her hair, to her walk, to her speech. She always presented herself as the beautiful, graceful, fashionable, joyful, and pious daughter of the Pope. This presentation does contain a certain political tactic, or dissimulation to it, much like the one made by Cesare to Machiavelli, or Rodrigo to the Venetian orators and ambassadors, with his seemingly honest talk with them, like they were close friends, when that was far from being the case. And here's the thing: it is quite obvious this presentation worked to her advantage, according to the historical records, most people who met her, especially men, fell for it, (even her biographers to this day do) and they all appear to have never seen it past what she presented to them, in that way, she could,

and did, obtain what she wished from them: eulogies praising her virtues (a good and necessary PR the rest of her family should probably have paid as close attention to as she seems to have done tsc tsc), beautiful love poems, and of course valuable information and people who felt so attached to her person they were willing to help her in her political and romantic intrigues.

This all can be observed in various occasions during her lifetime: The writings of Ariosto and other intellectuals about her, the passionate love poems and letters of Bembo, the documented actions of both the Marquis of Mantua, and Ercole Strozzi concerning her. And we have the very interesting words of one of spies of Isabella d'Este, known as il Prete, whom she sent to Rome with the precise task of him learning every detail about Lucrezia, but when he met with her, he ended up disclosing more about his mistress to her than of actually learning anything significant about her, and in one of his reports to Isabella he says: "She[Lucrezia] is a lady of keen intelligence and perspicacity...” and in another one he writes: “one had to have one’s wits about one when speaking with her..." And as far as influence goes, there is certainly material indicating she did had a strong influence with her father, and it can only be speculated with her brothers, (although I think she did to a certain extent, I think it is undeniable that her contemporaries were aware she was the darling of the family, and to offend her in any way would immediately put them in disfavour with Rodrigo, Cesare and Juan, they spoiled her a lot, and were very protective of her) but it is noted Lucrezia was the constant recipient of petitions to Rodrigo, of various sorts, which implies they saw her as the best intermediary between them and the Pope, in order for them to get their wishes granted. Not Cesare, not Juan. So within the family, her influence can be supported by the evidence, and outside the family the evidence is way more limited, but considering all this, I don't think it would be far-fetched to say that not only it does seem she played a bigger role in the politics than it is usually conceded to her, but that she very well could have been more dangerous, more influential at times than Rodrigo and Cesare, only behind the scenes, as it really does appear to have been her MO. For all of the excellent diplomacy and political skills Rodrigo and Cesare had, they were still men, men at the front stage of power nonetheless, which caused other men to be more guarded in their presence, even if they felt dazzled by Cesare or Rodrigo's strong allure, however, with Lucrezia, I think it was a different story. She had the same mental and political capabilities they had, in fact, I'd argue there is much indicating she learned a lot from them, but all of that came under, was deliberately hidden by her, by the feminine cover, which both made these traits and her being perceived as a threat a lot harder, if not impossible, to detect. Which naturally, as seen above, prompted men, perhaps also women (although Isabella d'Este would not be included in this list jdsjdsj, for I think apart from her personal prejudices against Lucrezia and her family, she also recognized from the get-go the political shrewdness in Lucrezia since she was also a shrewed political woman herself), to lower their guards around her, and speak more freely, and here I believe, Lucrezia had a bigger room to be influential with them, engaging in diplomatic conversations, suggesting ideas about a particular political situation, asking something from them, and that being more well received than it would have been if it had been otherwise proposed or offered by her father and brother, and perhaps even her husbands.

[phoebehalliwell]

how would you rank the seasons from least to most favourite?

alright okay right off the bat worst season season 7. for starters i think this season has no staying power i mean like since i’ve been running this blog 4 so long now my knowledge of charmed is encyclopedic and insanely vast more than like it ever need be but for the longest time. i could not remember season 7. like wtf even happened there?? evidently leo became human??? cole returned? the avatars??? like all of it was just. it’s not even necessarily forgettable it’s just i straight up could not remember it for the longest time. and i’ve said it before the concept of utopia was way to advanced for a show like charmed to tackle i am not watching charmed for moral philosophy i am watching bc i love these girls ♥ hee hee hoo hoo magic adventure ✨ tho if i am to offer a single comment on utopia: it’s awfully rich for a show to go on about destiny and fate and then take a stand against utopia in the name of free will. but w/e. i don’t like leo in the avatars i don’t like his dynamic with piper in this season i don’t like whatever phoebe’s doing this season there’s like leslie?? maybe there’s someone else? boring & flavorless they should have been setting up her endgame instead of puttering around. and kyle. zoo wee mama. could have been a great antihero. morally gray. duplicitous. self serving. but no. they gave him all those traits and called him hero/love interest. s7 left a lot to be desired out of the characters and their relationships also gave us phat L’s such as the charmed ones are werewolves don’t worry about it and feminism peaked with naked women. shout out to zankou: demon, dilf, dub & the noir episode.

you know what? fuck it i’ll say it second worse season 5 genuinely fuck season five. this is probably a Very Specific beef 2 me But. i hate what they did to the charmed universe. this was the season that marked the transition of charmed from supernatural drama to campy soap which like. i love camp! i do! but fr. fuck this season and what it did to the worldbuilding. the early season have Such A Vibe to them man with warlocks and witches and just a couple niche monsters from assorted lore that the show took and made their own. season five opens with mermaids goes directly into fairytales then gives us superheros whatever the fuck was going on in that mummy episode the sandman leprechauns and nymphs. and i hate it for that. it takes away from this urban fantasy things that go bump in the night what lurks in the shadows of the back alleys of san francisco in favor of the ugliest cinderella dress ever put to television and an onslaught of horrible irish accents for a full episode. other issues with season five: cole’s still here? why? they don’t know and neither will you! we’re not redeeming him! phoebe’s not getting back together with him! yes he died we just refuse to let him go! the cherry on top of course being a cole-centric 100th episode. shout out to. hmm. lemme think about what i actually liked about this season. i like jason dean as a love interest i don’t remember what he did in s5 but i know he was there. the season finale i’ve talked about how stupid & shitty it was but idc i still love that episode and then shout out to bacarra the only original villain this season that was a proper serve. the crone gets second place.

next on this come on we all saw it coming season 8. it’s a bad season! and i get bts there was a whole lot happening budget cuts missing actor etc. but it goes beyond that. it was a bad season. billie and christie were bad. and i’ve said this before but billie in herself is not an inherently bad character. she was just the literal worst for the show. she was a dollar store buffy blonde confident cocky skilled and ready 2 fight evil But. we are not following her like we followed buffy we are following her mentors. it’s like if we had a show called giles that aired for seven seasons And Then buffy showed up. billie was insanely irritating to watch from our perspective and in general wasn’t like. well written. attempts to humanize her / give her more depth often fell flat. and then christy. oh nelly. oh my god. barely a character. not well acted but hey it would have been a miracle if she was. negatives include dumain who was a mess omg bringing back the triad bringing back the source billie & christy obvi and also involving homeland security. which is season 7′s fault which is why it’s the worst. dubs on the other hand include both coop and henry i really liked them the shoehorned love interests weren’t great but i like their characters i though the way the got rid of leo to save on the budget was really creative and gave us a great piper episode and of course the sugary sweet finale i love it i do what can i say.

yet another controversial choice aptly coming in fourth is season 4. i respect what season 4 set out to do. i think it was a good idea. long form narratives, keeping a darker tone, focusing on character-driven drama and growth. too bad it fucking failed miserably at all of this. cole as the source and phoebe as the queen of hell was just so so botched. they had a very unique opportunity following the death of prue to explore these characters and what it means to them to be charmed, to be witches. they saved the world but the cost is insanely high. they’ve lost an older sister. they’ve gained a new sister. how do you even begin to cope with all this? episodes such as hell hath no fury and brain drain fuck so hard because they work with exactly that. had the whole season been like those episode season four would sit at number one with flying colors absolutely no competition. but alas. we can’t have nice things. the show got so bogged down with phoebe & cole, in a way that was just so, so messy. for starters, whether you loved cole or hated him before, we can all agree source!cole sucked. he was such a strong 180 from what we had seen that the show had to make the source some type of possession to justify half the shit they were trying to pull. and then to pit phoebe and paige against one another over a man was just. disgusting. and the ending of course felt rushed because it was! they wrapped up that entire issue in a nice little bow much faster than they reasonably should have been able to. it could have been a great season. it was definitely not. shout out to the seer an iconic mastermind on barbas levels, as previously stated brain drain and hell hath no fury Specific shout out to piper’s scene at prue’s grave shout out to paige as a character i like what they did with her and um. yeah that’s it.

okay we’re exiting the shit tier in favorite of the good tier welcome to the upper half. kicking us off is season 6. season 6 did what season 4 could not in that it gave us a long form plot that still left plenty of room for like. normal demon of the week episodes. i love phoebe early in this season with her faboo haircut her brand new empathy power and her relationship with jason dean. obvious strikes against for whatever the fuck that baby crazy stint was and also the mata hari episode. yikes. i love paige’s hair color in this season nothing paige as a character necessarily stands out to me however i like how they seem to have hit the blend of work-magic with paige where she wants a life and career outside of magic however she still loves the craft and embraces is with an open heart and mind. season six also gives us chris who was a very fun male lead imo we really didn’t have many like him he’s bitchy. he whines and bitches a lot he’s got an agenda he’s a bit secretive but at the end of the day he just wants a family i like him. i like the character growth we see out of piper i like seeing her try to move on from leo i love seeing her get back together with leo i like her dynamic with chris and her fears about motherhood. i also liked richard but that one takes a lot of justification. L’s are witchstock hyde school reunion used karma off the top of my head also the paige/richard/addiction plotline was so tone deaf. also the girls were mean to darryl : ( he deserved so much better. dubs were chris as a character, tbh the episode little monsters, phoebe with empathy specifically saying i love you too to jason i could write a dissertation on that line alone also the courtship of wyatt’s father and i thought the reveals of evil wyatt and chris being piper and leo’s son were both fun and interesting plot twists.

coming in third is actually season 2 a season i really do love it’s just. it lacks structure. imo there is a lot to love about season 2 morality bites and pardon my past are both delightful time travel episodes we get jack sheridan and bane jessup two of my personal favorite prue love interests we get p3 h2o and a great prue plotline regarding the death of patty we get the super cute cupid episode it’s a great. collection of episodes. it’s not a great season. there’s just imo not a strong enough thread connecting the stories together it’s mainly held together by having the same characters in it over and over again i really liked dan personally but like. i knew we were wasting time there. he was just an obstacle. a super cute loving and caring obstacle who’s great with kids but lbr piper and leo were always endgame. wasting our time on dan was stupid. i do love the sister dynamics in season two “gotta hand it to those pesky little demons they sure have brought us closer together” but again. this season could have benefitted from a rex and hannah type or even like a cole or zankou. this season is less of a season and more of just like a handful of episodes, and while there are some fat dubs, there are also some definite swings & misses. shout out to the time travel episodes the prue centric episodes phoebe’s character growth and maturity throughout this season (e.g. her going back to college) and i also think the fashion got a lot more fun this season.

second place i’m saying season one season one was a really strong start and gave us these really compelling characters with interesting relationships between one another But. a lot of it just kinda falls flat. and credit where credit is due it was a brand new show getting its feet under it but the fourth sister feats of clay which prue is it anyway they just simply aren’t dubs imo. also i don’t like that 70′s episode bc again i am an asshole concerned about The Lore i can’t believe one bitch ass warlock caused the Charmed Ones to grow up without powers. it just really bugs me. all in all the plots as a whole like aren’t great imo they’re nothing to write home about (save for from fear to eternity) it’s really the characters that make this season so goddamn good.

first place congratulations to the one the only season three. this is just because it kinda hits all my requirements in that it has some banger one offs (e.g. all halliwell’s eve, the good, the bad, and the cursed) it has an overarching plot at the exact same time as the source becomes more prominent and obvi cole is also there with murderous intent i like the character growth we see especially from prue i like piper and leo finally get married overall i really like the aesthetic of this season that blends a darker urban fantasy tone with still some charmed fashion and whimsy. strikes against tbh phoebe and cole’s relationship i am insanely picky with my enemies to lovers and the do not come remotely close to cutting the mustard in fact they are almost immediately disqualified however from afar i can see and respect The Drama. shout out to recasting victor prue with pistols death as a character and shannen directing episodes

[prose-for-hire]

Ats headcanons

I enjoyed doing the btvs characters, so I thought I would do some hcs for working in a store they frequent and meeting Angel characters, perhaps an obstacle to your relationship and how things would develop thereafter. 

[Yes, there is some overlap with some of the characters that I did for the btvs hcs but it’s different stores and scenarios and a lot of the characters have had a bit of development since then!]

Warning: Spoilers for probably every season. Sex reference (only in one or two). Reader is cheated on by someone else in one hc.

I feel like these are slightly darker themes in some just cos the show is a little more like that than btvs. Some are so long I might as well have written out a fic but I like doing lots of different characters at once.

Feel free to request Hcs for any buffyverse characters I enjoy doing these !! 💖

Angel:

- Independent book store - He likes to go and buy from independent stores, he doesn’t trust buying from the internet - You are always extra helpful and you don’t mind that he’s usually quiet apart from thanking you - You often tell him if you’ve read one of the books and you liked it, or you tell him to tell you if its any good - You only ever see him in the dark or by the glow of the dimly lit store - He seems lonely to you, insular - You always enjoy that first Sunday evening of the month, because he pretty much comes in regularly - He really enjoys hearing you talk, you have lots of opinions on literature and the characters and some of them, he had never heard not in the centuries he had been around - You interested him and he liked that you didn’t know anything about demons, it meant he could feel almost human for the first time in a long time - You were his secret, none of his friends knew that he now exclusively shopped there because it meant he could see you, he had started talking just as much as you did - Sometimes, he cleared his whole evening and he would find himself caught in such an interesting conversation with you that time would fly by and you were supposed to have closed the store hours ago - He offers to drive you home, you accept happily and you really get on he might even invite you in and allow you to stay over if it gets too late (he would 100% take the couch no arguments srry) - So someone either barges in that morning or they insist they need to go to the bookstore with him next time he goes - I’m guessing Wes or Cordy - Both would sense the familiarity between you straight away and squint at him, checking if he’s gone evil because his face is actually contorted into a… pleasant smile - Either way they’ll start running their mouth about demons and angel will panic and pull them away leaving you confused - He’ll have to hurry away to take care of some demon, neither of you can stop thinking of the other for the full week - He’ll come in, sheepish, having to explain himself. Demons, all that. Probably feel guilty if he didn’t tell you he was a vampire too (cue an explanation of the curse) - You’ll surprise him, shrug, and ask if he wants to get a drink after your shift - First date of many, you might even join angel investigations after a while (not just bc you’re now in a very committed relationship with the boss)

Spike:

- You work in an electronics store. - His PlayStation stopped working (he threw it out of the window when he lost) so he’s demanding you fix it - You tell him it’s a write off. But you show him some good deals on a new one. - He smiles, thinking you were flirting, but it’s something you are supposed to do for your job - He pays with a debit card, that says it belongs to ‘Angel investigations’ - You presume he’s the named Angel, and say ‘Thanks Angel’ as he leaves - He turns back, starting to scowl, but then realises what’s happened. He keeps up the pretence so that Angel doesn’t figure out he’s taken the company card - He’s pretty lonely, so when he’s not swearing at his PlayStation, he’s thinking about the brief interaction with you at the store - He comes in a few more times, asking about accessories or extras he may need to make him win better - He sticks around for slow evenings sometimes. You start to chat to him, getting to know him, always giving him the warmest smile - Your hands probably brush against each other when you’re showing him something and he cannot stop smiling – it’s been the best thing that’s happened since he became corporeal again. Human touch. Your touch - Finally asks you out, you decide you’d love to spend time with him - There’s only one problem - You think his name’s Angel. So, he spends most of the evening telling you wild and very obviously made up stories about being an investigator and then becoming a CEO. - You go into a bar together and who should interrupt but the real Angel and he keeps calling your Angel by the name Spike. - You frown, having had enough and he’s caught up in some demon killing so he can’t come after you - He is too embarrassed for a while to talk to you again, but eventually waits for you after work - He explains everything, you roll your eyes and smile. The times you actually liked him had been when he was himself at the store. He would come in making you laugh and insulting customers under his breath to make you smile - You agree to have a do-over, introducing yourself again and smiling softly as he holds your hand under the counter before he continues to mutter his insults towards the customers.

Cordelia:

- You work for a temp agency, Angel investigations takes you on in their busy period (LA demons don’t listen to the curse of Halloween so it can get busy) - Real busy - So you are drafted in temporarily to help pick up calls - You have experience and you know all about demons (you used to live on a Hellmouth) - Cordy doesn’t get on with you at first, thinking you’re too perfect taking over her job - She wants her wage and its stretched thinner with a new employee - You reorganise the filing, make detailed notes and are really good on calls to potential clients - And you’re really friendly with her and she finds herself enjoying your company but she still gets suspicious of how good you are at her job - aka she gets a little jealous and it boils over one evening and she starts to ask Angel how long it’ll be until you leave - You overhear, ofc, and Angel’s eyes widen making Cordy turn and see your hurt face - And she feels really guilty when she sees she’s upset you - You just walk past her, pass Angel the files you had finished, and took your jacket to leave - Angel and Wes talk to Cordy, hinting that a lot of her attention has been on you recently – maybe she should think about why that is - You call in sick the next few days, thinking about checking if you can change your contract and be transferred somewhere else. She can’t stop thinking about you - When you’re finally back in, you start the day off in silence, trying to keep up your usual cheery phone voice - Cordelia comes straight in and apologises, handing you a hot drink exactly the way you like it - She hangs the call up that you were on, clicking the button in, losing you a client but this is more important - She tells you that she really likes you and she didn’t realise until she hurt you how much you meant to her in such a short time - She wants to know if she can make it up to you with maybe a dinner date? Say, tonight at that new place - Angel knows someone and helped her get reservations and you agree that it’s the least she could do which makes her smile

Wesley: 

(sorry this isn’t in the best moment of his character arc)

- Hardware store - You get suspicious when he’s buying a list of things that makes you think he might be doing something he shouldn’t - You honestly don’t get paid enough for this, but you had to confront him in the car park for your own moral conscience - He has purchased a bucket, some rope, heavy-duty chains and a large mallet - So you shout, ‘Hey! Are you planning on killing someone?’ (you’re not great with tact) - He whips around so fast and stalks towards you it honestly scares you - He has a certain level of menace, like the English villains in cartoons - “That, would be none of your business” he mutters, realising he would have to go back in and buy more if he wanted to keep you in his closet too - “You know, if it’s something supernatural you might need more than a mallet” you offer, you can tell when someone’s seen something supernatural. Something behind their eyes - He just shakes his head and leaves, but all the while he’s apart from you he can’t stop thinking about you - He glares at the woman he has held hostage, wishing she would just give up her information do he could find Angel - He finds himself walking back to the hardware store - Some dithering excuse about the strength of the chains or wanting you to show him some alternative rope - Gets into a conversation with you about either how you know about demons or why you thought he was gonna kill people - You tell him very obviously he is at least holding a hostage, it makes him crumble slightly - He’s been through a lot, what with the almost dying. Twice - He tells you to follow him and you shrug, chucking your apron at your friend on shift, asking him to cover you - You spoke in the shadows, not able to see each others faces. He told you everything, like everything since he had moved to the U.S, Sunnydale, everything. - He could tell there was something about you, I mean asking him if he was gonna kill someone? You were intelligent, perceptive and to him: better than the job you were in - You then told him of your own darkest moments - Bonded through this, you parted ways, but your minds never left that spot. Never left each other - You met up regularly after this, you hinting that he should probably let the woman go now. Maybe there could be another way to find his boss - Then one day she was gone, his mood lifted and he pulled you into him and landed a kiss - You start dating, helping him sort through everything and you probably eventually join Angel Investigations, Wesley thinks you’re better suited with him anyway

Gunn:

- You serve coffee at a local diner 24 hour diner.

- He comes in every Friday, but he’ll start coming in more regularly when he spots you behind the counter

- After his shifts, before his shifts for a morning coffee even if he’s late into the office

- Finds himself spending more money than is feasible on eating out just because you’re there

-  Decides he had better ask you out. So he does.

- Very cool, very collected

- you can’t help smiling at the way he’s leaning ever-so-cool across the counter

- You’re so pleased he likes you, he had definitely caught your eye, and you jump at the chance to go on a date with him

- There’s only one problem: he finds out you’re half demon and you have a big hatred for a certain mystical law firm that had ruined your family

- He’s cool with the half-demon thing, but it does mean he’s lying about where he works now

- He likes you too much to ruin it over anything like a job

- But one day, after dating a few months, you find out. You were summoned to a meeting at the top floor of the building, the only one that could translate as you passed for human

- There was some misunderstanding over the sacrificial killings being presumed murder by the CEO and his team

- You walked in to find your boyfriend shuffling his papers waiting for this translator he didn’t want to have to deal with

- This results in an argument in front of the whole team and your extended family who don’t really get what’s going on

- You storm away and Angel lets your family off due to the bad publicity he’s informed will take place if they do anything else

- Gunn lets you cool off but eventually can’t stay away and comes into your work and you try to ignore him

- he follows you into the back, apologising over your boss who is shouting at him for coming into the employee-only area

- he takes your shoulders, looks into your eyes and promises he’s working there for the right reasons, telling you that he’s on the right side of this but if you asked he could see about looking for different employment

- he wouldn’t stop saving the world, but he could transfer to some kind of ‘consultancy’ status

- you smile, appreciating the gesture but insist that he shouldn’t lose his job for you. You accept his apology and start to make things work - promising to be honest from then on

- he kisses you, cupping your cheek and moving your head towards him, the verbal promise sealed with the kiss you shared

Fred:

-  you’re a barista in a coffee shop

- she’s always in early mornings and late nights, sometimes you open a little later knowing she’ll want her coffee with extra cream and sugar

- she always bashfully thanks you, insisting you shouldn’t have waited, so you have to admit seeing her is often the highlight of your day

- she’ll blush and shake her head, sipping slowly on her drink. She’ll grin and say it’s exactly how she likes it (you had it waiting for her, she didn’t have to order)

-  you get to know her over the months she’ll pop in, becoming a really close friend of hers.

- which soon leads into more, both of you being very affectionate. It comes so naturally         

- problem is that the tension in her office could be cut with a knife. Almost everyone had a crush on her, whether she was aware of it or not

- you became very insecure, distancing yourself from her after you noticed

- thinking maybe she would be better off with one of the others. she was so upset, her brow furrowing and her work not being her best

- she felt alone again, like she had when she was trapped on Pylea. she just wanted to speak to you about it but she couldn’t. she didn’t get why you were being so cold

- One day you notice one of the men in the lab harassing her at work when you pop in (your coffee store does deliveries now) and you cuss him out

- she smiles, grateful. Her nose scrunching as she smiled. You nod awkwardly, handing her drink and leaving which makes her deflate a little (she wanted you to stay)

- finally, she comes in on her day off - which is odd cos it’s so far from her apartment. she tells you she wants to spend time with you and she wants to know why you suddenly stopped seeing her

- you explain everything, on your break. She shakes her head and smiles fondly at your explanation. 

- she promises the only one she has eyes for is you. You grin and she insists you should have spoken to her about it sooner

- you mysteriously come down with an ‘illness’ after your break and ask to take the rest of the day off and spend it in bed with Fred

Lorne:

- you work in an exclusive theatre, work in the ticket office for premiers

- You see Lorne a lot and always give him a winning smile

- He knows you by name straight away, he’s a people person

- But it was so more than that, he was absolutely entranced by you but you couldn’t tell - he was always around celebrity types what with his job so you felt like he wouldn’t want to look at you twice

- he always stopped to talk to you, savouring the moment you had together

- he was thinking of asking you to dinner, or to accompany him to a premier one time instead of you mostly staying in the ticket office

- however one time, before he had chance to ask, he brought a friend with him. Wesley

- he talked to you, Lorne visibly tense at the way he took a shine to you

- you start to date Wesley on and off after that evening,  

- Lorne gets annoyed at the way he treats you, dropping you any time that Fred so much as gave him a second glance

- you felt lonely and sad, the only person able to cheer you up being Lorne

- he kept you company a lot, growing so close to the point you trusted him more than anyone. You were so comfortable with him, in the way 

- he desperately wants to hold you in his arms, take care of you the way that you deserve

- one evening you say that you had better leave, Wes was supposed to be taking you out

- you walk to his office and find Wes kissing Fred. You scream, shout and then storm away

- Lorne hears the commotion, following you out and scooping you up and holding you into him 

- the warmest embrace one you didn’t ever want to move from

- he stayed with you for months, building you back up for entirely selfless reasons. 

- one day, way after everything that happened with Wes, he looks at you and his feelings let slip

 - you smile, shocked. You hadn’t realised he felt that way - you had thought you would never have a chance with someone like him. You tell him this and and pulls you close

- you kiss, the passion that has been building since the day you met finally pouring between you. You both smile at each other and you pull him in again for another kiss

Doyle:

- You work the register in a liquor store

-  He came in fairly often, the hard stuff the only thing that would help with the visions

- you like his humour, and his accent, and he always has a smile for you even if he’s had a crap day

- he really likes you but he doesn’t know how to tell you

- won’t shut up about you to Angel. So much so that even Angel was gonna march him over to your store and demand he ask you to put him out of his misery

- but luckily, you took a shine to him so you were the one doing the asking. Or, more hinting that you would be getting off your shift soon and that you could share one of his fine bottles of cheap liquor if he wanted company

- almost choked on his words in his enthusiasm, so he just nods and waits for you to grab your stuff

- you spend a lot of time just talking, sharing intimate details and connecting

- his irish lilt was music to your ears and he smiled in that boyish way he does when you tell him this

- You finish a bottle and since that night, he’s addicted. He wants to spend all of his time with you

- He keeps the visions secret at first, but eventually one night he has a bad one – needs to see Angel and you tell him he needs to rest

- You worry, but he’s insistent

- So you come with him and find out about the demons that you had never quite managed to notice before

-  He shares, explains about everything while he’s holding you in his arms. Only thing is he manages to avoid the fact that he’s half demon himself.

- You become closer, noticing Angel and Cordelia (you were friends with them both now kind of) seemed to be hinting he needed to tell you something

- You only caught whispers, the end of conversations but you decided to ask him

- He avoided the question, he didn’t feel good enough. He didn’t want to lose you, you were too important to him – he thought you finding out he was demon would make you run a mile

- And then, one evening he had left to help at Angel Investigations when there was a knock at the door. It was a spiky green demon, apparently a distant relative of your guy

- You invited the demon in, making sure to be the perfect host(/ess)

-  Doyle eventually came in, eyes wide and panicked when he saw the relative. You continued to pour the tea, offering him a cup which he declined and went straight for the hard stuff

- The relative stayed the night, at your insistence, and when you and Doyle went into his room to sleep you asked him to show you that part of him

- He reluctantly did, incredibly embarrassed. But you just kissed him softly and slipped into bed, patting the other side for him to join you

- He grinned, thanking his lucky stars and your relationship only grew from there

Harmony:

- You serve at a Demon bar.

- You make drinks and various cocktails of slime and blood

- Starts as a fling, she doesn’t expect it to be anything more

- Sometimes she’ll talk down to you or start nibbling on your neck. You get on at her to stop, she knew you were human to begin with

- She tries to use sex to distract you, but you want the romance too

- She isn’t used to people wanting a romantic relationship, so she expects you just want sex like her past relationships

- When she realises how soft you can be and how much she enjoys it, things change

- Harmony slowly starts moving her stuff in, suggesting brunch and calling you cheesy pet names that you find adorable.

- You find yourself excited about this, she appears well-meaning and she’s very sweet with you. A little bit fang-happy sometimes but you can let that slide

- You treat her with kindness that she isn’t accustomed to in relationships, she decides because of this its true love. Like in a romance novel.

- Absolutely not used to such kindness.

- You’re happy with her excitement, not because she was treated so bad, but because she feels for you like you feel for her.

- When she double-crosses the people she was supposed to be loyal to, you have a big argument

- You love her, but she relies on the ‘I’m a vampire’ excuse and won’t take responsibility

- There’s a rough patch and both of you are so upset without the other

- But she comes back to the home you shared one evening, calling you the sweetest pet-names and apologising in her own way

-  You accept, continuing to date and explore a healthy relationship, trying to help her with her own self-worth too

Lindsey:

-  Gas station

- You have served him both on his way in and out of town, the many times he has left and come back

- You don’t usually remember customers, but you do remember customers that have the seeming ability to grow back hands

- You were always kind to him, maybe a little extra friendly but he never usually stayed to chat

- He had been in a bad mood the last time you saw him, but he had nodded at you before he left

- He was coming back into town again this time, stopping for gas and you hadn’t thought you would see him again

- It had been such a long time, you figured he had finally moved away for good. You liked making up stories about the customers that stopped by, it made time go a little faster on slow nights

- Tonight you were on your break when he rolled up in his truck, looking pleased with himself

-  You were outside, catching some fresh air and he struck up conversation. He had a glint in his eye, some purpose he was coming back for

- He smiled, actually started sweet-talking you. It appeared that he had you in his memory too

- He asked if you wanted to see each other, now he was moving back to LA

- You have nothing to lose so you say yes agreeing to drinks to see where things went

- Things start out good, for a while. Until he asks you to quit your job and get a job and infiltrate a formerly evil law firm

- You have no experience, no anything but he manages to swing it for you. He just wants you to watch them, for now

- You realise you feel like you’re being used, there’s more to the plan than you realise

- You come home one night, a black eye after Angel ‘asks’ you if you know anything about the amulet – some girl that’s supposed to be dead said you weren’t the real liaison with the senior partners

- Lindsey apologises, gets mad at them for being cruel to you. Tells you everything, his plans, his reasoning. Says he wants to hurt them more now they’ve done this to you.

- He cant stop apologising while he holds you close to him in bed

- He loves you, he tells you and you choose to trust him. feeling it so intimately

-  He looks out for you and he’s protective of you if you come with him to Wolfram and Hart ever

- Instead of getting caught up on the fight he catches your eye and decides, for the last time, to leave LA this time – he wants to take you with him

Lilah:

- Hotel check in. you’re a receptionist who basically runs the place

- Lilah’s having sex with someone senior for information that will get her a promotion

- You’re always nice to her, she’s always short with you

- One day you snap, asking why she’s such a bitch. You weren’t usually like this, but you had a bad day and it suddenly came out

- She smiled, arching an eyebrow and just turned to leave satisfied that nobody is as nice as you had been pretending to be

- She had been pushing your buttons on purpose, seeing how long it would be until you snapped

- It had surprised her and been a couple of months of her being rude to you

- she smiled, saying her door would be open if you wanted to do something about it

- It of course, started off with an angry passion, sex just because you could. for convenience and just to get frustrations out (from both of your jobs)

- It was easy for both of you, but suddenly after a while of your arrangement you let something slip in the throws of passion

- The ‘L’ word

- Boy was she mad at you for saying it. Shoving you almost off the bed, snatching up her clothes and calling you pathetic before she stormed away

- she refused to answer you calls after this, for a while. You didn’t realise she was scared of her won feelings that surfaced when you said what you did

- You came to her work, she threatened to call security but you mentioned a few confidential cases she had left around the hotel room that you managed to cast a glance over

- she agreed to let you into her office so you could talk

- and surprisingly, you did. She tried her best to keep you at arms length but the promise of someone to actually care about her with no ulterior motives was too much

- she agreed to meet you that night, the first tentative feeling of a relationship coursing through you, hopefully you could convince her to take a chance on you

[evergreen-dryad]

time capsules

3 - soulmate AU

the one where whatever you write to them is bound to find their way to them, one way or another —

so Nene’s letters make its way to Amane in 1969.

Amane finds a note scrawled in loopy handwriting one day in his capsule. I wonder if my soulmate will ever read this.

Huh? His mind at a blank. He's never seen this sort of variation in any of the papers that come flushing out, disappointingly, instead of a more interesting product.

He pockets it without a word, heart in his throat, hands sweating

And it looks real. Really written. Just a thumb over it and he can feel the indents of graphite, from a deliberate hand inking it straight in.

Perhaps from repeated etching. His index finger curls around it, scrunching it slightly. He breathes, and looks out of the corner of his eye.

Tsukasa hasn't noticed a thing. He's pouting at the machine, wide yellow eyes round and baleful as he jiggles it with careful, measured motions, aiming for the yellow capsule on the bottom most left.

Amane exhales shallowly, and loosens his hands. This is the weekly capsule he often finds himself idly spinning for while wandering back home, tagging slowly after Tsukasa to keep an eye on him. And Tsukasa almost always meanders to the sweetshop.

The granny who runs it is perhaps the kindest adult around to them, who doesn’t just shirk her eyes away when she sees them, as if afraid of catching an infectious disease. But then again, the granny is quite getting on in years — her bottle-cap glasses are thick and rounded, and Amane isn’t quite sure he’s ever seen her eyes widen beyond the perpetual squint.

Still. It is a good place, and while Tsukasa may play rough with the shop’s cat, the cat is no-nonsense enough to not tolerate him if he gets up to one of his nasty ideas.

Often, Amane has caught the cat hissing at Tsukasa, his arms put up placatingly, while its entire body fizzes up into a bottle-brush.

Today, Tsukasa spins his third capsule, unable to stop. “Third time’s the charm, right, right, Amane?”

That’s what you say for any number, Amane thinks to himself, resigned to waiting. He knows Tsukasa will not leave until his attention has spun its cycle.

He sits there under the flowering tree, sunning his face through the cracks of the late afternoon. It’s a clear day — perhaps it’ll keep for the night, and Amane can track Orion’s progress.

“Hey, hey, what did you get, Amane?”

“A piece of paper.” He shrugs one shoulder.

“Aww… it’s one of those ‘Try Again’s huh… I hate those! I think I’ve got…” He counts rapidly on his fingers. “103 of them.”

“You’ve got them all labeled as usual then?” He humours. No, Tsukasa is the one who makes him count them with him. Tsukasa’s first reaction is usually to rip it into shreds or find a much more creative use for it. It pains him, but he lets it because they’re too small to be truly useful.

He wonders what he’ll do about this note. Too small, and the writing encompasses almost the entire strip. It looks like a line from an exercise book.

(Maybe they’re trying to do some schoolgirl love letter joke product.)

It nags at him, after they've gone through dinner and their mother's inquisition and are up in their room again, obediently folding their clothes for the next day.

Tsukasa does his sloppily all while humming the theme song from the radio, and peppering Amane with questions about what possible stars they'll see tonight.

Slowly, Amane smuggles the little note from the pocket of his trousers into the sleeve of his pyjamas, where it settles against his skin for the night

*

He finds the next one the same way: this time, it’s I dream of you everyday.

A little heart next to it, and a strange doodle. Amane thinks it might be a face, but he can't stare too long to find out. He casually slips it into his pocket again, with hopefully not too much of a beat in his movement.

Surely this is a prank. A not-very-funny one at that. It's a coincidence, nothing more than that. He rolled the dice and rolled this capsule out with a piece of paper with fortune nonsense on it, not his cosmic fate.

*

One two three four five, and Amane still hasn't answered. Yet he cradles these slips of paper close to heart, nestled together with the moon stone in his everyday pocket.

(He doesn’t know why. But he feels better about keeping them close on him, in a place he can reach out to touch for comfort.)

Little slips of paper through the capsules. Doodles unfurl in the corners of his notebooks, like his soulmate’s letting him in on secrets. He can almost hear the voice of the girl (it seems like a girl?) singing as she daydreams her way across the straight black lines with colourful pens. Highlighters of a shade he's never even imagined before.

(He finds himself liking the soft purple one best.)

*

And then the cat from the shop arrives with a letter round its collar.

.

// from this list of prompts here for August. this has been sitting in my drafts since Feb as well I think. It’s gotten really messy over time (*screams*), and frankly my main excuse for writing this is to include Showa Candy Shop 3 in it, and explore what Amane’s life was like back then.

Also: I thought it would be really, really embarrassing if whoever you dreamily doodled about could see them too. Once I panicked bcs I thought a crush might have seen what I’d written oh god

-did emoji exist back in the day i don’t think so boomer gen are extremely unlikely to understand kaomoji at first glance -Amane is a tactile bean look at canon Hanako -the shop still exists in Nene’s time, and it’s a descendant of the cat she entrusts her letters to. -losing them makes it easier for them to go where they need to go -post office works too when she can’t find the cat, though it’s much slower -guess amane gets to collect modern era stamps now -yep it’s a move away from capsules hmm -hand and notebook ‘texting’! -mild fix-it in some areas of Amane’s life? (the later parts of the draft have been about home life oof) -...I need to think about the time-travel consequences and what it changes

Obstacles include: Amane’s characterisation, and thus Tsukasa’s (now when I review over what I wrote, I feel like Amane avoids him too much? And sounds almost dead when he talks? hdajaj)

-changes in motivations (Amane)/timeline - what finally makes him respond? a) please stop doodling flowers over my very important star notebook pls and tq, b) tsukasa finds out/nearly with the cat Who knows what, how much do either of them know about what’s possible

-will there ever be any Nene POV. Include sparsely/flashback for poignancy?

[ofbloodmagick]

ROSE ARABELLA GORE

pronouns: SHE & HER + THEY & THEM

age: TWENTY - FIVE

sexuality: PANSEXUAL * DEMIROMANTIC * MONOGAMOUS

astrological signs: GEMINI SUN * SCORPIO MOON + ARIES RISING

occupation: BARTENDER @ DUTCH’S + MULTIPLE SIDE HUSTLES

+ traits: PERSUASIVE. ARTISTIC. RESILIENT. FASCINATING. ORIGINAL. RESOURCEFUL. WISE. ADVENTUROUS. BOLD.

-- traits: ECCENTRIC ( CREEPY ). SECRETIVE. DAMAGED. RESTLESS. TWO-FACED. JUDGMENTAL. RECKLESS. IMPULSIVE.

faceclaim: BILLIE LOURD

soul sounds: PLAYLIST !

aesthetic: ( TW: BLOOD ) BOARD !

YO YO YOU YO — it’s lydia here with my lil blood witch arabella , i have yet to get the chance to  r e a l l y  play her and i’m super excited for the chance bc i love them so very much. i have headcanon after headcanon for them , so hit me up if you want to do something bc i am ready to do some shit. anyway , LYDIA ( nary , nettle , snottie , etc. ) here again and i love a good name change , i’m twenty-five years old , a pansexual demigirl ( she / her * they / them ) like arabella themselves , and i reside in the central timezone ( FLORIDA IS HELL ). continue reading to learn all about ARABELLA GORE — the intense , mysterious clever little powerhouse that loves to be number one. 

PERSONALITY

RULING PLANETS: pluto — planet of power & regeneration * mercury — planet of communication * mars — planet of war & energy BODY PART: crotch * reproductive organs * shoulders * hands * head * face GOOD MOOD: resilient , magnetic , passionate , loyal , protective , artistic , brave , fascinating , original , resourceful , wise , adventurous , unstoppable , bold , devoted  BAD MOOD: obsessive , possessive , jealous , secretive , vengeful , manipulative , eccentric ( creepy ) , restless , two-faced , judgmental , proud , self-centered , impulsive , bossy , stubborn , reckless  ( SOME ) FAVORITE THINGS: obscure underground music , spicy food , an air of danger , one of a kind objects , organic ingredients , vinyl , magic , the color black , horror films , blood , fast cars , guitars , new clothes , road trips ( in fast red cars ) , expressing themselves through stunning verbal and physical feats ( SOME ) THINGS SHE HATES: simple small-minded people , insincere flattery , personal questions , living at someone else’s house , mornings , dress codes , authority figures , silence   SECRET WISHES: to have complete and total control +  to have all the answers + to be number one HOW TO SPOT THEM: intense eyes , hawk like gaze , smooth movements , dry blood/bruises/cuts/scars on pale skin , silver hair , big black bow , mischievous twinkle in their eyes , talking with their hands , focused or manic energy , aggressive stance WHERE TO FIND THEM: listening to bauhaus in her dark room , sitting at the corner table of a shitty underground bar smoking a cigarette , selling her magic and / or blood in some dimly lit room  KEYWORDS: intimacy , secrecy , power , intensity , obsession , cleverness , wittiness , inventiveness ,  ingenuity , willpower , initiative , determination , passion , self-belief

arabella’s mind and mouth are busy machines , always moving at warp speed. this witch is one of the most curious and cutting-edge individuals you will meet. there are at least two personalities inside of her at all times. adventurous , she can change her mind faster than the weather and is constantly flipping between moods. 

a true pioneer and trailblazer they’re the first to initiate things , fight for their beliefs and fearlessly put themselves out there. headstrong and determined , ella’s energy can be stubborn and willful a lot of the time. she does have a tendency to dig in her heels , stand her ground and absolutely refuses to be pushed around. 

they will butt their own metaphorical horns against the same obstacle until they break it down — often with sheer force of will. extremely confident , she believes in herself and will on occasion champion others she deems worthy.

she does love to chatter and has a million great ideas , always keeping a notebook handy to jot down her thoughts and ideas at any time. at times , their energy can circulate in a quick and frenetic way , the silver haired wiccan is known to inspireswitty wordplay and dynamic dialogue. 

when she applies herself , arabella is great at brainstorming and socializing. she also craves her “ twin flame ” and kindred spirit’s energy , always up for an intellectual meeting of the minds. 

under the influence , they find themselves with the gift of gab; talking and conversing with others for hours , hopping from pop culture trends to deep political topics. beware “ gossip girl ” ella though , they can crank up the rumor mill sometimes unknowingly. as renowned dr. bernie siegel says , “ [ we ] have the ability to cure with either ‘ words ’ or kill with ‘ swords. ' ” 

powerful and sensual arabella is perhaps one the most misunderstood and mysterious person you could ever meet though. secretive by nature , this southern witch tends to linger in shadowy and hidden places that most wouldn’t usually have the courage to face.

she believes strongly in life , death and resurrection and arabella embraces these life cycles. she is continually transforming and reinventing herself. there are actually more like four sides of arabella and it really just depends how she feels about you.

the first is venomous and possessive like a scorpion ; the second as slippery , charming and deadly as a snake ; the third like a soaring eagle whose piercing gaze sharply observes the landscape ( and its prey ) below ; and the fourth side ever burning and all seeing as a phoenix that rises up from the ashes into eternal rebirth.

your muse may find themselves dealing with an intense individual with lots of energy. she has been known to hole herself up late at night to process complex emotions or channel her overwhelming feelings into focused work and creativity.

the essence of arabella’s personality is magnetic , fascinating , original , passionate , loyal , protective , trendsetting , controlling , unstoppable , bold , powerful , resourceful , wise , adventurous , focused , bond oriented and brave. on the flip side though , she can also be obsessive , possessive , jealous , prideful , self-centered , impulsive , bossy , stubborn , reckless , competitive , two-faced , judgmental , overwhelmed , secretive , vengeful , to even cruel , calculating and manipulative. 

she channels her intuitive tides into a forceful stream of psychic and healing energy. arabella excels in exploring the darker , unexamined sides of life. it has given her excellent research and sleuthing skills , helping her plumb the depths and peer below the surface. this witch likes a challenge , but she does have to really try hard not to fall into being selfish and domineering.

she will without question help out in the darkest hours; this witch bitch is not afraid to go into the murky waters of the emotional and spiritual unknown. intense feelings surface around her closest ties , but around those she isn’t close to ella has a wall up.

believes strongly in merging , bonding and sharing resources. she may get obsessive about a passion project or lover ( forrest ) , even becoming jealous or insecure. this mysterious demigirl wants to hide all of their vulnerabilities. yet , those raw and unprocessed feelings are often their access to power.

arabella can be tricky to understand. with her reserved persona , she seldom starts a conversation or expresses interest in others openly — unless she feels out the situation first.

once you get her to open up , however , you’ll feel her scorching passion for whatever topics fascinate her. be warned: arabella can focus on one subject to an extreme , so you may be in for a deeper dive than you or your muse expect — or want lol

her natural charisma can quickly pique someone else’s interest in the topic too though. 

another way to spot the witch ? look for her piercing gaze , which is hawk like at times narrowing in on her “ prey ”. if you happen to be the focus of that look , watch out.  you will feel read as easily as a children’s book as arabella seems to just KNOW all your secrets , soft spots and fears.

their focused attention can be addictive , even painful when pulled away. be careful how quickly you fall down their rabbit hole — it’s not as easy to crawl back up once you do. when you befriend them , you are likely entering into a power couple or formidable alliance. while she doesn’t give up loyalty and trust easily , once she does she’ll stick with you through thick and thin.

don’t even think about double crossing her tho bc she WILL unleash her fury on you , divulging secrets and airing dirty laundry or worse. revenge is her favorite dish to serve and it’s ice cold. on a positive note , arabella’s like the perfect person to help explore darker emotions or sexuality , happy to guide most through fifty plus shades of irresistible and soul communing experiences.

arabella can come across as clever and quick-witted , but part of the fun ( and curse ) of interacting with the witch is that you’re never quite sure which personality you’re going to experience. will it be the vivacious jokester or the snarky , mean-spirited critic ? 

although they may crave complete and utter control over everything , they secretly yearn for the very thing they fear: true intimacy with others. it takes a lot for ella to reveal her vulnerability , so guard that privilege with the utmost care. as she opens up and learns to show her shadow side , she can heal in ways that are truly profound.

highly impatient and competitive , they have the fighting spirit. ella were born to be number one , a star who steals the spotlight and inspires with her confidence. yeah , they can be impatient , even a little bossy , especially when they don’t get their way. she need lots of attention and can throw quite the tantrum when she doesn’t get it. fortunately , arabella rarely has a problem turning heads.

others love to follow as they take the lead on the latest adventure. she has to be reminded to make sure and let other people be the boss every now and then too , because she has a tendency to alienate potential allies. when they focus their competitive streak into a diva-worthy goal and delegate , they will always rise to the top !

they have a lot of energy , which they apply to everything from tackling supersized projects to unleashing their lusty libidos with forrest. this confident demigirl is known to leap before looking , diving into each new experience with a zest for life that few others can muster. 

they love to be number one and can be a bit of a trendsetter. she has been described before as ‘ a true original who inspires the rest. ‘ with all of their fire power and can-do attitude , there’s nothing arabella can’t ( or won’t ) take on. at times , ella can be selfish or overly focused on herself and it can be a “ blind spot ” for them , they may need a gentle reminder from time to time to share. 

she likes to shatter glass ceilings but can also be off-putting to people in extreme doses. this go-getter can come across as abrasive or overly aggressive , however; arabella will never back down from a challenge and can take on being the champion of those in distress when need be.

BACKGROUND

( TW: child abandonment ) so arabella doesn’t know her parents are but she does know that they ended up in some small southern town called suspiria , located in virgina of all places. her mother was really into the surface level southern gothic aesthetic suspiria offered and the unlikely couple settled there until arabella was born. her parents didn’t keep her very long though seeing as their shotgun wedding was never built to last and after she was born they both returned to where they came from or at least that’s as far as the story goes if you ask anyone in suspiria. 

( TW: military ment. , death ) her parents actually went their separate ways , her mother returned to her wealthy family and comfortable life never to seek out the unnamed child she’d left behind in some no name town. her father went on to join the military and was lost in the line of duty with no one to even pass that knowledge on. 

the infant rose , as they were first called back then , was left on the doorstep of an orphanage and that was where they would spend their childhood. it was not a pleasant place to grow up at all , but she was incredibly lucky in finding her twin flame in a sad , lonely young boy also growing up there.

little ella was never once adopted and she made damn sure to change the minds of anyone who so much as looked in her direction or asked her name. they grew an unhealthy attachment to forrest almost the minute they laid eyes on him , but they are connected very deeply and even as children arabella was acutely aware. 

growing up ( maybe even to this day ) they were considered a loner , an outsider , the weirdo , a creepy kid , etc. and the bullying only got worse. the people in the shitty children’s home and the tiny backwoods town in virginia ? they didn’t really respond too well to the two strange kids that collected animal bones and hunted for ghosts. 

in their early teen years ella started practicing satanism , but that was really just a gateway religion into wicca and her true passion , witchcraft. forrest took to it just as quickly as they did and soon the two had formed their own little coven , something that didn’t stay secret very long.

forrest , being the more scholarly of the two , found himself working for the governor on his campaign and eventually recruited arabella to do the same , but she worked more closely with the governor’s wife and the children. it only took a week , two tops , for the power hungry woman’s true intentions to came to light — dark magic.

( TW: cheating , infidelity )it’s true that ella helped with the gardening , the children , the cleaning , the cooking , all the usual suspects but she also did a number of spells involving blood and shadows. the items they created most for the governor’s wife was their own recipes for love potions and anti-aging blood serums. the woman was extremely suspicious of her husband having affairs with younger women , pretty self explanatory as to why she was seeking help from a known magic user. 

( TW: blood ment. , devil ment. ) it was something of a hot topic in suspiria , the governor and his family hiring the two freaky orphans and why. not long after , a photo was leaked of the governor’s wife as arabella painted her face in the bright crimson blood serum they had concocted themselves. it was common knowledge by then that the two practiced witchcraft and suddenly every headline was about the governor and his wife being ‘ corrupted by the evil devil worshipers the kind family had taken pity on. ‘ 

( TW: assault ment. , death , arson , house fire ) the town ? literally ready to burn them at the freaking stake and the two couldn’t go anywhere without fear of assault of some sort or worse. to make matters all the worse , the governor’s wife and children perished suddenly in a terrible house fire and who was the easiest target to pin it on ? arabella and forrest , the two town rejects , which is exactly what the governor did. they were treated as murderers , hunted like criminals , which is why as soon as they found out about the raging fire they left town. 

( TW: death ) for the next four years arabella and forrest were on the run from the governor and his goons , not stopping in any one place for very long for fear of being caught up to. over a year ago they finally got word that the governor had kicked the bucket and that anyone still looking for them likely had stopped by now. not long after , arabella came across a beautiful , vintage gothic home far more expensive than it was priced , but luckily for them the home had a rather grisly history and had been on the market for so long that the owners had cut the asking price tremendously.

( TW: scamming ) arabella was convinced that it was a sign from the universe letting them know it was okay to settle down for good now and once she’s convinced there’s no real changing her mind. so , by halloween of 2019 they were moving into the beautiful gothic home of the witch’s dreams and not long after they had rooms in their ‘ haunted home ‘ listed on every website possible to lure in dark tourists everywhere. how true everything is ? well , the two did take quite a few creative liberties and the occasional diehard , truly experienced fan of the paranormal would ( possibly have ) call them con artists. 

( TW: scamming ) not only do they rent out rooms , but they also have the occasional ‘ murder tour ‘ of their ‘ serial killer ‘ house. what it really boils down to is arabella has been hustling their whole ass life and it’s never going to stop. there is quite a bit of truth to their stories , but though both ella and forrest have encountered the paranormal multiple times in their lives , not just in pleasance either , they’ve never had any real activity that could count as reliable proof. everything involving the businesses run out of the house are little more than sideshow entertainment for pleasance dark tourists.

( TW: blood ) the witch also has a part time job working for jules at dutch’s , her official title would be a bartender but she really just does what is asked of her. you probably guessed it already , but she does also have a side operation selling her blood magic from underneath the bar at dutch’s and they’re hopeful that their boss is none the wiser.

ETC.

she does still have a slight accent because she is from such a small town where everybody had a drawl or twang. she doesn’t have a good education by typical societal standards , because she had such shitty public education growing up as an orphan and no one who enforced her learning or attending. they are , however;  incredibly street smart and by no means stupid. they have since taught themselves how to learn in a way best for them and are always devouring book upon book in order to teach themselves things otherwise she may never know. 

( TW: blood ) ella is a blood witch and often uses her own blood , animal blood , someone else’s blood , pretty much if there’s blood in any form she’s set. she 100% sells her magic to anyone who wants it and does dabble in the shadow side. it might not actually work all the time , but that’s not entirely her fault. 

( TW: bruising / injury ment. , blood , scar ment. , self harm ) a pretty big feminist , used to be in an all femme band called the hex girls ( come for me ) , goth and proud ??? a really big horror movie fan , pansexual demigirl representinggg ! always has bruises and cuts , dried blood covers their skin a lot where they miss it or just don’t care to hide it , also has quite a few scars from where she’s cut too deep ( some maybe on accident , some maybe on purpose ).

( TW: blood ) ella’s very creative ! they like to read , write , make art — out of blood lol she uses blood of all types to create a lot of art. she takes blood baths ( animal blood ) occasionally on the full moon , drinks animal blood during certain rituals , etc. also super into bone and taxidermy , you can definitely find her at deblanc’s. they also like to haunt the cemetery and creep around spotlight cinema , film is a big passion of hers. 

( TW: drugs & alcohol ment. , blood ) DOES imbibe lol a partaker of alcohol ( prefers animal blood with red wine or vodka ) and certain drugs. ella definitely smokes weed & cigarettes , they enjoy partying just like the rest but she’s more reserved and likes to people watch.

okay so it’s getting late and i can’t believe how long this intro actually took me to finish tweaking , but if you want to plot with me pls pls pls hit me up bc i’d love to do some stuff !! my tumblr DMs are always open and you can always hmu on discord too !! i also write bryce winslow ( milo ventimiglia FC ) but you likely know that lol. i’m sure there’s more i could say about arabella honestly , but if you have any specific things you’d like to know or it seems like i left something out or need to take a second look at something i’d appreciate any / all feedback. can’t wait to get some replies out , but that might have to wait until the morning. @phqextras​

[gamerwoo]

Kihyun: Comfort

Anonymous asked: when u mentioned deaf mate i immediately thought about kihyun lol for some reason ... bc he has a really nice voice, that maybe a lot of ppl fall for that, but his mate couldnt so yeah.... but it would be maybe a pity if his mate couldnt hear him lol ignore me

Characters: Kihyun x deaf!female reader (featuring Monsta X and ofc)

Genre/warnings: werewolf au, college au, angst, fluff

Word count: 3,547

Summary: Kihyun’s used to people falling for his voice. He’s used to men, women, and everything in between and outside gathering around him when he sings around campus. You, however, can’t hear anything. After an accident as a child, your world has gone silent. But Kihyun always makes it work, and even finds a way to make you hear him.

a/n: things in bold are in sign language (and I’m really sorry if anything is inaccurate because I didn’t have anybody to ask for reference so pls know I did my best and I’m sorry if I somehow offended anybody hard of hearing ok thank you) ((and I’m also sorry for any spelling errors lmao)) 

You’d never stopped to hear the boy with the angelic voice sing outside by the bistro. He always watched you walk by, his eyes glued to you while his mouth formed the words from memory. Despite music being something he loved, Kihyun already loved you more. You were his mate, after all -- you just were unaware of it.

Meanwhile, you never stopped to listen to him because you didn’t hear his singing. You couldn’t hear his beautiful voice flow through the air as effortlessly as the wind, nor could you hear the people who clapped when he was done. In fact, you couldn’t hear anything. The world was silent to you, so you didn’t notice a lot of things, actually. 

That was why it took so long for you to actually meet Kihyun.

There was something Kihyun didn’t notice about you, though: you were deaf. He’d never seen anybody sign to you, and he never realized he’d never seen you talk to anybody. 

“Hey,” Kihyun got the attention of Changkyun and Minhyuk beside him as you walked into the cafe for lunch. He nodded his head toward you. “Do you know who that is?”

“Nope,” Minhyuk replied simply.

“Kinda,” Changkyun shrugged, “why?”

“She always walks by when I’m playing, but she never stops to listen,” Kihyun sulked, resting his chin on his fists as his contact-covered eyes watched you walk over to an empty table and set your things down. “She doesn’t even look at me.”

Changkyun scoffed, “Well, I’d say there’s a pretty good reason for that.”

Kihyun’s head darted to the side to look at Changkyun, “What’s the reason?

“Wait,” Minhyuk spoke up, looking at his brother with wide eyes as he lowered his voice, “did you imprint?”

Kihyun ignored his question, gripping the youngest pack member’s shoulders, “What the reason, Changkyun?”

Changkyun gave his brother a strange look, “Sh-she’s deaf, hyung. Now let me go.”

Kihyun released his grip as everything in his head suddenly clicked. Why you weren’t entranced by his voice like everyone else; why you never spared him a single glance. It wasn’t that you were ignoring him, it was that you couldn’t hear him -- or anything, for that matter.

But that realization hit, and he stared at you across the room as it sunk in that his mate was deaf. You couldn’t and would never be able to hear him, and he would have to find other means of communication. You probably did things different than he would, and he’d have to accommodate for that.

But it was okay, because Kihyun would do anything for you, even if you didn’t even know he existed.

Flash forward however many months later, and you were inseparable from Kihyun. He rushed to become fluent in sign language, he was always patient with you, and he always found a way around obstacles in your friendship-turned-relationship -- despite how romantic it sounded, the story of the two of you finally dating was really quite boring. You were just glad you had Kihyun now.

There was always one thing that upset you, especially when you found out it meant a lot to Kihyun.

While in the kitchen watching Kihyun help make dinner, you noticed his lips moving while he cut vegetables. It was something he seemed to do a lot -- talk to himself. Even though you knew there were other people in the kitchen, you had turned to see if maybe he was having a conversation, but Hyungwon was on his phone and paying no attention while Changkyun was playing a game on his laptop with his headphones on.

You tapped your mate’s arm lightly to get his attention. Why do you talk to yourself?

Kihyun chuckled at your question before replying. I’m not talking to myself, I’m singing.

You cocked your head to one side. You sing?

He just nodded with a smile.

Hyungwon looked up when he heard Kihyun laugh, catching onto the conversation. He sighed, saying to himself, “A little too often...”

Do you like singing?

Kihyun nodded quickly. A lot.

You frowned, looking back at the counter with furrowed brows. You never knew Kihyun liked singing, you just thought he was talking to himself this whole time. But you were upset because you couldn’t hear him sing. Your mate clearly enjoyed it and you couldn’t even enjoy it with him or encourage him. You just wanted to hear him sing for yourself.

Kihyun put a finger under your chin, making you meet his worried eyes. What’s wrong?

You just shook your head, not wanting to upset him because you were upset. Nothing, don’t worry.

But even if you told him not to worry, Kihyun would worry until he figured out what was bugging you.

-

You couldn’t stop thinking about the singing thing for two weeks. You didn’t let it show, but whenever you saw Kihyun ‘talking to himself’ you’d frown a little and wish that you could hear. Sure, you didn’t need to hear his voice to love him -- you loved him for everything else -- but you just wanted to love everything about him. It never bothered you that you couldn’t hear his normal voice, but singing was something he loved. You wanted to be able to witness and enjoy something he loved for yourself. It almost made you feel like a bad mate for not being able to support him.

Changkyun’s hand waved in front of your face, making you blink and get dragged back to reality: class.

Changkyun sat beside you at the table, looking at you expectantly. You okay?

You just nodded. I’m alright. Sorry.

Can I ask you something?

I guess.

Have you been okay lately?

Changkyun wasn’t normally the one to check up on you. Changkyun was more like the goofy friend that you could go to for jokes and to dick around, but he was never really serious about anything. If you wanted somebody to check in on you, you could rely more on Kihyun, Shownu or Wonho. So the fact that Changkyun of all people was asking if you were okay meant you must not have been hiding your feelings very well.

Why do you ask?

Kihyun started singing when he was walking us to class, and you were frowning the whole time -- you’ve actually been frowning a lot lately when hyung sings. Do you not like it?

You wished you could know if you liked it or not -- though you were sure you’d like it just because it was Kihyun and you’d want him to sing to you even if he ended up sounding like a dying toad. But instead of answering Changkyun’s question, you asked one of your own -- one you’d wondered for a long time.

Does Kihyun sing well?

Changkyun gave you a puzzled look.

Does Kihyun’s voice sound pretty?

Chankgyun shrugged. Yeah. I guess so. Why?

What does it sound like?

Changkyun just shrugged, making some kind of ‘I don’t know’ noise that you obviously didn’t hear. Why are you asking weird questions?

You shook your head, turning back to your open notebook. It’s nothing. I was just curious.

Changkyun wasn’t stupid. He figured Kihyun’s singing must’ve had to do with it. Were you upset you couldn’t hear it? Is that why you were asking about it? Is that why you frowned when he started to sing? He kept those questions in his head even after class when he brought up the topic again, not wanting to let it go until he got to the bottom of what was wrong.

You frowned when he stopped you from leaving the room to sign the questions to you. The professor was gone and so were the students but you wanted to just leave and go have your hour break in the library alone.

Please just let it go. It’s not a big deal.

Kihyun knows you’re down about it and you know he’ll worry either way. You might as well let me help you.

No offense, but you’re almost dead last on the list of people I’d ask for advice -- especially relationship related.

Changkyun frowned. Harsh.

You rolled your eyes, letting out a sigh through your nose. I don’t like that I can’t enjoy something that he loves. He loves singing and I can’t even hear it. He can’t sing to me or anything.

He gave you a sad look, guessing where this was going. So what’re you saying?

You hesitated, feeling silly admitting your deepest fear.

What if I’m not good enough for Kihyun? He deserves somebody who can hear him and enjoy the thing he’s good at and loves to do, and that’s not me.

You could see that Changkyun definitely felt bad that you felt that way, but you could also see that he didn’t know how to convince you otherwise. The only person that he thought might be able to help was Kihyun, but you clearly didn’t want to tell him about your insecurities.

Before Changkyun could even gather his thoughts to form any kind of reply, you were moving your hands again. I’ll get over it, don’t worry. I’ll see you later.

With that, you gathered your things and left the classroom.

-

You were starting to forget about what was upsetting you. Since Kihyun could tell you were bummed out about something lately, he was doing everything he could to cheer you up, and it was working. It was very effectively taking your mind off of things, and he wasn’t ‘talking to himself’ as often because he was often too busy with you.

But then somebody was added to the pack.

“...What?” Minhyuk asked with narrowed eyes and a confused expression as he looked at Wonho’s love struck expression.

“I found a lost dog, and it just happened to belong to my mate,” he shrugged, still grinning like nobody found this sudden. “We spent the whole morning talking -- she made me tea and offered me breakfast and she’s really amazing. She’s into fitness, too, y’know!”

“Wow, great, just what we needed,” Hyungwon grumbled, “a second Wonho...”

It was only a couple days before she was invited to the house and introduced to everybody. You said hello to her even though you didn’t like using your voice -- you were afraid of sounding ‘weird��� but Kihyun always told you how much he loved when you spoke to him -- but from the quizzical look she gave you, you could tell she didn’t quite understand why you sounded a little different. And judging by the looks of the other wolves, she had said something that they seemed to find...not right.

“She’s deaf,” Shownu had explained when Arielle wondered why you sounded the way you did. “She won’t reply to you, but she’s still nice to everybody.”

“She’s deaf?” Arielle repeated, looking at her mate now in confusion. “But if imprinting works how you said...why is _____ perfect for Kihyun when she can’t even hear him?”

From her tone of voice, they could tell she didn’t mean it has awful as it sounded. She was just curious as to why fate would put a werewolf with a human who clearly had a big ‘flaw’ -- at least, that’s how they were seen to society -- but it came out a lot more rude than the harmless question she had in her mind.

Kihyun refused to tell you why the pack was looking at her like that. He simply educated her, accepted her apology, and moved on.

But beside that, Arielle seemed sweet. She clearly adored Wonho as much as he adored her, and that was nice to see. But the sight of them being so happy and in love also left a weird feeling inside you and you weren’t sure why at first. You thought seeing your brother being in love and happy would be nice, but it made you wonder if that’s how you and Kihyun seemed from the outside.

What you were used to was seeing your relationship from the inside, which was silent conversations, facing each other to speak with your hands, and having to drop everything if your hands were full just to have a conversation. But with Wonho and Arielle, it was so much more...more. She’d sit in his lap with her back to his chest and they would just talk and laugh like it was nothing. They could do their own thing while they had conversations, and they could even do their homework and study without having to stop just to ask a simple question. They seemed to happy and easy going, and you started to think back to your doubts from before. You tried to keep them down but how could you when the perfect relationship was right in front of you and it wasn’t even yours?

And being at school only made it worse.

It wasn’t a surprise that Kihyun was popular, specifically among women. He was a good-looking guy that could sing like it was his job, and tons of girls wanted to be where you were: by his side. They wanted to be able to say they belonged to him and he belonged to them, but only you could. Of course girls hated that and were jealous of you, but there was one girl that really hated it.

She was some exchange student, that’s all you knew. You didn’t know where she was from and you didn’t really care because you knew she was hitting on Kihyun any chance she got. Whenever Kihyun was singing on campus to earn a little extra cash, she was always sitting front and center, listening intently the whole time. She fell for his voice like so many other people so you couldn’t blame her, but it didn’t mean that Kihyun wasn’t off limits.

So when this girl found out that he had a girlfriend -- you -- she was less than happy about it.

A couple weeks after Arielle started coming around, you had a piece of paper slid in front of you. You looked up at the familiar girl, though she was glaring at you before she turned sharply on her heel and walked away, leaving the folded paper in front of you. You’d never said a word to her so you weren’t sure why she was handing this paper off to you, but you would’ve been lying if you said you weren’t curious.

She was told all about you. How the girlfriend of Yoo Kihyun was deaf and couldn’t enjoy his singing like everybody else could. How the one thing Kihyun was known for, you had never experienced it. She thought it was a pity -- a stupid, silly pity.

Setting aside your work, you reached forward and grabbed the paper, unfolding it before your eyes scanned her handwriting. You felt your heart sink when you read the harsh words about how you didn’t deserve Kihyun, nor were you good enough for him. Kihyun was born to be a singer and you couldn’t even encourage him or cheer him on because you didn’t even know what he sounded like. You were all but worthless to Kihyun, at least that’s what the note said.

You looked up, wanting to know if the girl had left, but she was stopped by the doors to the library. You felt your breath catch in your throat when you saw your mate standing with her, smiling as his mouth moved while he spoke to her. She was laughing, touching his arm as she said something to him. He grinned wider, giving a slight bow as you recognized ‘thank you’ form on his lips. You could only assume she was complimenting him -- probably on his singing which you couldn’t hear and never would.

The note on top of seeing Ariell and Wonho, on top of how you already felt after you found out Kihyun liked to sing -- you wanted to cry. Tears were already forming in your eyes behind your glasses as you looked away from the scene before you and packed up your belongings. You had been studying well after your classes were over and you couldn’t concentrate anymore anyway. You just wanted to go home and hide in bed and hope Kihyun wouldn’t get off campus until you’d already cried yourself to sleep.

You left through the back exit, hoping Kihyun didn’t see you or sense anything was wrong.

-

Kihyun frowned when he got home. The sun had already set but he knew you would’ve been in the kitchen making food for him like you always did on his late nights. However, you were nowhere to be found, and he was pretty sure he heard faint sniffling from upstairs.

“Where’s _____?” he wondered as he entered the living room where Wonho and Arielle were curled up together on the couch.

Wonho just shrugged, “She came in and went straight to her room.”

Jooheon glanced up from his chair where he was watching TV, “I saw her come in with tears in her eyes and go straight to the bedroom. When I went up to check on her, she wouldn’t come out from under the blanket. Changkyun said he knew what was wrong but couldn’t tell me.”

“What, why?”

“Because he knew I’d tell you and he said she said you can’t know.”

Kihyun groaned before he swiftly left and took the stairs two at a time to get to the bedroom quicker. He silently opened the door before shutting it just as quietly, but you still somehow sensed he was there. You tried to be as quiet as possible as his soft footsteps got closer, but it was hard keeping your sniffles quiet.

The bed beside you dipped before the blanket by your head was being slowly pulled back. You quickly held it closer to keep him from looking at your tear-stained face, pulling a sigh from him. He couldn’t talk to you if you couldn’t see it so how was he supposed to lure you out?

He decided not to get you to come out. Instead, he went around to his side of the bed and got under the blanket himself. He laid on his side, facing your back before he managed to roll you over. You could just barely see him from the little bit of light that came in from parts of the blanket that didn’t touch the bed.

Kihyun frowned, looking worried when he took in how red and swollen your eyes were. You might not have been able to see him well, but with his eyesight, he saw you like you were in direct light.

Baby, what happened?

Instead of signing, the words just tumbled from your mouth as you started sobbing again, hiding your face behind your hands so Kihyun wouldn’t see you cry.

“I can’t hear you sing which is something you love, and then I got a mean note about how I’m not good enough for you, and I already didn’t feel good enough because I can’t hear anything much less anything from you, and I just wish you got a different mate so you could be happy but you’re stuck with me instead!”

He wasn’t sure how to reply other than by wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to his chest. You buried your face into his body, clinging to his shirt like he would agree with your words and leave you. But he held you close, hushing you even though you couldn’t hear him while he rubbed your back soothingly.

In this position, Kihyun couldn’t talk to you. Even then, he wasn’t sure what he’d say anyway. So he just naturally did the only thing he could think of to do to calm someone: sing. He knew you wouldn’t hear it, but it wouldn’t hurt, either.

You could feel soft vibrations from his chest as he sang. They had a pattern to them, like a rhythm, and it started to soothe you and stop your crying. Kihyun definitely noticed, your sobs being reduced to sniffles and whimpers, and then just sniffles as you tried to get your nose to stop running. The patterns would change, the vibrations getting more intense and more soft at different times sometimes, but you’d get used to those patterns before they changed again. Sometimes there were pauses between the sets, but they would always pick back up.

Eventually, your eyes closed and you drifted off to sleep like that. As you were on the verge of unconsciousness, it hit you that Kihyun wasn’t just making random noise or something -- he was singing to you. It was why there was almost a rhythm to the vibrations in his chest and why he would pause between them. He was thinking up songs to sing to you to calm you down.

He smiled softly to himself, realizing that you couldn’t hear him sing, but you could still enjoy his singing in your own way.

“You’re perfect for me, _____,” he whispered when he heard your breathing even out, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, “and I love you more than anything.”

He knew you didn’t hear him, but he could tell you properly tomorrow.

[in-tua-deep]

Thinking some more about the sort of training that the siblings would have gone through,,, Going to put this under a read more since it’s gon get LONG

LUTHER: Luther is deceptively the easiest one with the simplest and more straightforward power in my opinion? His powers are super strength and durability. So of course there would be general strength training, weights, etc. But endurance would have been a fucker. Having Luther hold massive weights for long periods of time until Luther physically couldn’t anymore. You can’t tell me that old Reggie would have been a good spotter, especially for the sort of weights Luther would have been on, so either Grace is stronger than she looks and helped out (possible) or Reggie just had Luther train without a spotter (depressingly likely). How often did Luther get hurt during his straining? Strain muscles? Drop weight or other objects on himself when he couldn’t hold it up anymore under the disappointed eyes of his father? Of course, I’m sure there would be shotput esque training. Luther hurls a bad guy out of a bank window, after all. He’s no Diego but I’m sure Reggie would have thrown in some throwing accuracy training for efficiency. And of course his power of durability - which I am actually afraid to theorize about? Are his bones more durable? I’m going to have to assume his muscles and bones are more durable due to the weights and shit he’s capable of lifting. Does he bruise? What sort of force is required to injure him? These are questions I am sure Reginald Hargreeves has written somewhere in that notebook of his but I am afraid to know how he found them out. DIEGO: Diego obviously has the power to throw things with incredible accuracy, curving them mid air and capable of manipulating their path. I’ve seen some things floating around regarding him being forced to practice with someone, usually Grace, as the target and having to throw the knives as close to her as possible. Which is, of course, unbelievably shitty considering how much Diego obviously cares for Grace. His training would probably also involve strength training? Though not to the same extent of Luther. But logically the stronger he is the more force he can put behind an object and the larger an object he would be able to throw to manipulate.  I can also see Diego having to do it blindfolded, having to rely on his memory of a room to throw knives at targets and having to do that repeatedly until he could bullseye every one to Reginald’s satisfaction. This would help him out in situations like when Luther was in his room and he tossed a knife through the crack in the door, relying on his memory of the room’s obstacles to curve the knives around to (almost) hit his brother. Also testing the general extent of his ability? Does he have to put the motion behind the knife himself in order to manipulate it (a la throwing) or would be be able to, say, drop a knife off a building where it isn’t him but gravity exerting the force on it?  I know in the comics(?) Diego has the ability to hold his breath pretty much forever but honestly the idea of Reginald Hargreeves testing and training that is really depressing for me and all I can think is him putting Diego in a water tank like he’s a glorified aquarium pet and then I get mad. ALLISON: Oh man, Allison’s power would be rough to train because it’s more about figuring out the limits of it than it is about training it to get stronger. On a related note, how did they even find out about her power which has a specific set of trigger words? Were they all just being little kids and teasing each other and it just happened? What was her first rumor? Okay anyway. SO because I think Reginald would have absolutely and expressly forbidden Allison from rumoring him (and I dread to think about what must have been the one time it did happen, because you know kids and pushing boundaries), I think Reginald either a) brought in strangers to have Allison use her powers on/took Allison out to have her use her powers (the former more likely bc controlled environment, at least at first) or b) have her test her powers on her siblings (depressingly likely). Personally I think both happened, I think she probably started out rumoring her siblings (it would have been fun at first, a game, like Simon Says) making one of the others do jumping jacks or dance. Then mood altering things (I heard a rumor you’re really happy today! I heard a rumor you think Klaus’s prank is stupid. I heard a rumor you want to play with me!) where she starts changing opinions and Reginald wants to see how long they last for, if she rumors for someone to forget something, will they ever be able to recover the memory? Do her powers have a time limit? Then, of course, she rumors Vanya into thinking she’s ordinary. Then I think for Actually Dangerous Things Reginald wouldn’t have wanted to damage the goods, so to speak, and would have started importing people for Allison to rumor. I feel like Reggie is That kind of asshole, so they were probably people no one would miss. Addicts, homeless people, criminals, etc. And then he’d have Allison rumor them to do things. He’d want to test to see if basic human survival instinct would overrule Allison’s rumors, right? Or maybe rumoring someone into doing something they’re so against they reject Allison’s rumors? Violence is something she was clearly comfortable of using her rumors for as a child. The first time we see her as a kid use her powers in the bank robbery, she smiles and tells the guy to shoot his friend in the foot. She doesn’t even blink at hurting someone, or using someone as a vehicle to hurt someone. And then in general, testing whether she would have to be face to face with someone to rumor them. Can she rumor people over intercoms? Over the phone? If she had a megaphone, would she be able to project her voice further to affect someone who wouldn’t be able to hear her without it? Can she rumor deaf individuals? If someone can’t understand the rumor (language barrier) will it still work? If someone is blocking out her voice with noise cancelling headphones, would it still work? Can Allison rumor people in other languages? If so, would sign language fall under that? I have a Lot of Questions, hello. KLAUS: My poor boy, my son. Okay, so clearly his ability is speaking with the dead and summoning spirits which really makes me question why the fuck Klaus was out running about on missions when his powers aren’t very offensively capable (barring when he manifests Ben to help out, which he Very Much Could Not Do when Ben was alive and kicking or literally anytime before that moment). Like, what the fuck Reggie? Was he the eternal lookout? Anyway, from what we can see in the show, Reggie’s focus seemed to be for Klaus to get over his fear of ghosts in order to access his abilities more. To be fair, Klaus’s power is a fucking difficult one to train for anyone without the powers. Klaus could deny until the cows come home that any spirits were present without Reggie being any the wiser, even if there were actually spirits present. Which is probably why fucking Reggie ended up tossing Klaus into the mausoleum and locking him in there, because he assumed that spirits would manifest in there for Klaus to see since it’s a house of the dead. Who let this man have children, again? Because surprise surprise, tossing children in with their greatest fear without any assistance or help and expecting them to get over it in fact traumatizes them even more! Before that though I think Reginald would take Klaus places and demand he commune with the dead and relay information to him. Or specifically take Klaus to like, a grave or something and try and make him purposefully conjure up a specific spirit idk. It probably wouldn’t work too well since, you know, Klaus is scared of the dead, but Reggie wouldn’t have cared. Hey, maybe he asked Klaus to summon up the people Allison presumably killed either via rumoring them to kill themself or rumoring someone else to kill them, two training with one stone amiright. Yeah, fuck Reginald Hargreeves for fucking up my son so badly. I wonder how many times Klaus fed him absolute bullshit answers or looking up murder stories and pretended to summon their victims and gave Reggie details that could be backed up just to get the old man off his back FIVE: Okay I have a lot of feelings about Five’s training bc,, he’s my fav sorry not sorry. First of all: his jumps. How far he can go, how many jumps he can make, whether distance is also a factor with how many jumps he can make (can he make fewer jumps if he increases the distance he is jumping). I definitely imagine that Reginald ordered Five to chain jump until he couldn’t anymore, and then tried to get Five to push through the block to jump even more. Did Five have set limits, or would training actually increase his spatial jump stamina? I also discussed in a fic about Five’s limits regarding movement and jumping. I think that ‘spatial jumps’ implies movement, and so if Five was immobilized and tied down I don’t think he’d be able to use his jumps to escape. Though if, say, it was just his hands tied together I think he’d still be able to move forward and jump he’d just take the restraints with him tbh. So I think as training, Reginald would probably try and figure out the limits of what conditions Five would be able to jump in. Can Five jump spatially in materials other than air? Aka, would Five be able to jump if he was in a body of water? Can he jump INTO objects other than air such as water? I’m assuming he has something that prevents him from jumping into solid objects and splicing himself (god or at least I hope he does) but would that extend to liquids etc.? Then I believe he was also trained in precision micro-jumps. Essentially, when having an object thrown at him he would be able to jump just a little bit to the side or in front of the object to avoid it hitting him without jumping across the room or something. Handy in tight quarters. In a fic I theorized that Reginald would essentially swing a cane at him to have Five jump to the other side of the cane before it hit him, and I stand by that. Then in general other testing, what can Five bring with him when he spatially jumps? What is the limitation of his ability? The size of an object? The mass? Composition? Five’s clothes clearly travel with him, but the only time we see him attempt to take a person with him that I can remember is when he tries to time travel with them, not spatially jump. Was he tested with animals before an attempt to jump with a human occurred? Could he jump with say, a hamster in his pocket? Does he have to be aware of what he’s taking with him or if something was slipping in his pocket would it travel with? Does he have to know where he’s jumping in order to do it? Does not knowing risk him splicing with a solid object? Would be be able to jump from a locked room into an unfamiliar second room, without seeing what or who might be inside? I have QUESTIONS. BEN: I feel like Ben’s power would just be straight up difficult to train tbh. Work on those core muscles man, get a regiment going. It caNNOT be easy to keep upright with a bunch of flailing tentacles coming from your person, I can barely keep my balance when one (1) small child attempts to climb my person. That shit has to be HEAVY unless there’s somehow no weight due to being otherworldly or something idk. They seem solid enough when they’re stabbing people, so I’m going to assume they have some heft to them. Ben must have abs of steel and the balance of the literal fae god damn.  So yeah I figure the only way to train that is?? To just do it? In a closed environment? Maybe getting rid of some of the people from Allison’s training? Try and control the other dimensional tentacles Ben and kill these people in a specific order or something! If you can order them to pick up that couch and throw it across the room then you get a treat! Literally I do not know. Presumably it is a very difficult power to control at least at first since Ben goes in a separate room to kill those bank guys without any of his siblings following him. They just wait until he’s done. Then as he trains he gets some more control until he dies? Bc he doesn’t kill any of his siblings at the theater there’s that, though idk if that’s because he’s dead or what - can Klaus aim Ben’s powers at people? Can he make Ben only corporeal to the bad guys to kill them and make him just go through the rest of them? But yeah idk how Ben trains smh VANYA: we see the tuning fork thing in the show, which presumably was pretty much the only training Reggie really managed to think of for Vanya to control her powers? I don’t know when their powers manifested but I’m assuming he didn’t know what they were from birth or anything. Allison’s at the very least requires speech. Diego’s requires throwing things which I’m pretty sure is a developmental milestone, being able to throw things. Can you even imagine a teleporting baby? Fucking anarchy for those poor nannies. So I’m choosing to assume they didn’t get their powers until they were at the very least toddlers with the vague ability to reason with them, because can you fucking IMAGINE Vanya weaponizing crying baby screams?? Grace would have been created a whole lot earlier lemme tell you that. Overall after he makes Allison fuck her up, Vanya seems to participate in training as an observer and recorder. He seems to care about her intellectual prowess at least and?? I don’t know, maybe was trying to fashion her into a sort of handler/trainer for the rest of her siblings? Maybe he gave her some of his data on the other siblings’ training to analyze. Maybe that’s what they were so angry about being in the book, idk. At least she had her violin as an escape amiright. That’s all I got for now lads, I haven’t read the comics or even looked at them so you know, I have no idea what that’s about, and I referenced exactly nothing besides the Wikipedia page idk how accurate that is so if there’s an answer to one of these questions hmu!!

[tenacityblitz]

all the numbers u haven't done

roleplaying habits questions.

1. what’s a grammar rule you find yourself breaking or ignoring a lot?

Offhand I can’t really think of anything?? English is my first language so I don’t knowingly break any grammar rules anyway. Unless possible excessive use of commas counts bc I use commas a lot.

2. are there any languages besides english in which you think you could comfortably roleplay?

Unless Gibberish counts bc I learned that stupid crack language back when I was a kid but good lord I would not have the patience to actually type out a reply like that. 

3. how often do you reach for a synonym dictionary when writing? how about mentally?

Sometimes but not too frequently. Depends on how flowery I’m trying to write something or if I’m thinking of a word but I don’t like the first descriptive word that came to mind for what I’m trying to express.

4. how often do you need to translate your own or the other’s writing with a dictionary or google when writing and reading replies?

Never tbh. Especially since I don’t RP in any other languages, all my RP partners have a good enough grasp on English that I can always tell what they were at least trying to say in their reply.

5. do you listen to music while your write?

I used to need music playing in the background to help me focus on doing drafts, but nowadays I need more silence than anything to help focus and produce what I think is a quality response to a longer thread. Short one or two liner things idc what’s in the background. 

6. do you have ideal writing circumstances when you can do a lot of drafts or tackle really long ones very easily?

I can fluctuate with when I best write. Typically I write better at night when the house is quiet and any noise happening in the house is a noise I make, but I’ve had writing inspiration hit me at any time of the day before.

7. are you a morning, day, evening, or night writer?

Bold of you to assume I’m awake during morning hours that don’t include 5 AM bc I’m still awake haha. When I’m not swamped with commissions to do I typically write better during the day or at night when I’m the only person awake in the house and I don’t have any outside distractions from a person IRL.

8. how does tiredness affect your writing?

Not overly so sometimes, I know there’ve been times in the past where I powered through replies even though I wanted to go to bed just because I was riding the motivation train and I didn’t want to lose it and not get to those last replies for who knows how long. But on Discord at least I often have reply to Discord threads be one of the last things I do before I go to sleep so I go to bed knowing I don’t owe anyone a reply on there.

9. have you ever written a serious reply intoxicated?

Not a serious reply anyway. I’ve been on the dashboard before while intoxicated (ColossalCon East was a prime example haha) but I’ve never really RP’d while that intoxicated

10. how much do you proof-read as you are writing vs. proof-read at the end?

I’ll proof read as I go but also give it one last read before I actually hit publish.

11. when you are writing a reply, how much ahead in the thread do you plan?

Entirely depends on the thread. I could write it on the fly or I could have days to think about it from external factors keeping me from getting to the reply as soon as it comes back to me.

12. is there ever been a time when you’ve had to drop a roleplaying partner because you’ve found their writing style exhausting?

Yes actually, gather round for RP horror storytime haha. Flash back to 2013 while I was still in the Black Butler fandom. I stupidly decided to give writing Sebastian a try at the request of a Ciel I’d made friends with (probably through my old Alois or Lizzie blog). She was a nice enough girl, close enough to my age so she seemed plenty mature, and had been what I thought was a good enough writer to warrant trying my hand at a muse I wouldn’t have otherwise thought to try. Legit within days of me making the Sebastian blog she was getting super clingy in her IC posts making Ciel a whiny baby missing Sebastian, would try and guilt me in IC posts to get on and write with her, and I dealt with it for about two weeks before I deleted Sebastian’s blog without warning and deleted the girl off Skype. To this day it’s the only blog I think I’ve ever consciously deleted.

13. does writing roleplay things in public spaces make you uncomfortable?

Not really? I wouldn’t be crazy about a stranger reading over my shoulder while I was writing bc that’s just weird, but I’ve gone to Starbucks or one of the local malls before on my off days (back when I was still at my last job) and I’d do RP stuff there just to get out of the house.

14. how often do you need to change the icon in your reply while or after writing the reply?

Typically I don’t put in icons until I’m done writing the reply unless I go into the reply knowing exactly which one I want to use, or think of a good one while I’m writing it out.

15. do you first get in the “zone” when writing, or do you start writing and “enter” it that way?

Nowadays I just start writing and then get into the zone after I get the first reply done. Discord replies I can chug out any time of day without difficulty, but for whatever reason Tumblr I have to be in the right mindset for. 

16. what is your biggest obstacle to writing every day, if time doesn’t count?

Back when I was at my last job, it would be getting a lot of writing muse while I was busy at work and unable to get on my own laptop or sneak onto Tumblr on an office computer and at least type out the bulk of a reply (yes I was employee of the month many times haha), and by the time I was able to get to my own computer or be safe enough to get on a work computer, that writing muse would be gone.

17. what’s your inbox count currently? what did you do to get it so high/low?

Right now I have 15 IC asks. I won’t lie, two of them are from last years Valentine’s Day bc I was away at Katsucon at the time of receiving them and by the time I got home I still just never got around to answering the asks, but I didn’t want to delete them either so I just kept them for posterity. Some are from this past Christmas that I was terrible and haven’t answered yet bc I’ve been so swamped with commissions, some are from other random meme’s I’ve reblogged and gotten an ask or two for and also just never got around to. I’m horrible at replying to asks most of the time and I know it but I always appreciate whenever people take the time to send me an IC one.

18. how many drafts is a paralysing amount?

I’d guess I’d say over 15 like para thread replies would make me be like -insert meme song- ‘how could this happen to meeeee’. I’m not quite at that point yet but I’ll get there eventually if I’m not careful lol.

19. if you are writing a wrong reply that’s not working out, do you save what you have to be continued at another date, or do you scrap it and rewrite?

Usually I would just draft what I have and go back to it. I can’t remember the last time I scrapepd an unfinished draft and completely rewrote it.

20. longest reply you’ve ever writen on mobile?

N/A because I don’t do replies on mobile. I’ll send asks on mobile but I never reply to actual IC things while on my phone unless it’s something stupid and cracky or one-liner-ish.

21. does the total amount of threads you have going on matter to you, or just how many you owe?

Doesn’t really matter. I can have one thread with one person, I could have five threads with one person. @shinvcho is an example of the latter lol

22. what’s your thought process when you format? any unspoken rules you follow?

I’ve kept to the same formatting for years and years tbh. I’m too lazy to do excessive formatting beyond italicizing and/or bolding specific words for emphasis and spacing out the start of a new paragraph. Anything more than that to me is just tedious and unnecessary; I don’t want to make it difficult for my partners to read.

23. how does your follower count affect your mood?

Anyone who says they don’t appreciate or enjoy even a small spike in followers is a liar, because we live in an age where validation is held in high regard and it feels good to get the validation of seeing more people enjoy what we do on our blogs enough to put us on their dashboards. But it also doesn’t really matter to me when I lose followers because I have a mutual checker so I can unfollow a mutual back if they did so first so I don’t feel uncomfy still following someone who no longer wanted me on their dash lol.

[okietokiee]

The Song of Achilles/Metalocalypse AU

ahh !! I commissioned a friend of mine (who is an incredible artist and specializes in custom/DnD art!! If you’re interested in her work her etsy is MadisonNicoleArt) and she helped me finally create an AU I’ve been obsessed with for a while!

Ok this is going to be pretty long, so bear with me !!

If you’re not familiar with The Song of Achilles it’s basically a retelling of The Iliad by Homer, but from the perspective of Patroclus, the right-hand man of Achilles. It’s a beautiful, magical tale and if you’re familiar with The Iliad the ending is (spoiler)  gut-wrenching and heartbreaking. You spend the whole story knowing what’s coming, and you almost get lost in the enchanting beauty of Achilles’ and Patroclus’ relationship with each other. 

Now when I first got into the Mtl fandom I was surprised there weren’t any Iliad AUs (BUT CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG AND SEND THAT SHIT MY WAY), because Achilles was a beautiful, golden demi-God (sKWIsGAar in a nutshell LOL) and Patroclus his stong, toned, gorgeous (im extrapolating here but...) right-hand-man/partner/lover/soulmate/other half who, though never prophesied by the Gods for greatness, had his own strengths and made his own name for himself following his heart (Achilles ;))

Here are just some ideas I’ve had about this:

Skwisgaar

- Serveta being a promiscuous Queen who has a one night-stand with a lower level God that left immediately. The God’s seed was so strong that after birthing Skwisgaar his mother became incapable of having any more children and she resents him for this. 

- However, Skwisgaar was prophesied by the Gods to become the greatest/quickest warrier of his time with potential to become one of the Gods. His step-father (gentle Tyr) married Serveta and he loves her dearly, though she constantly cheats on him and neglects her only son. 

- Tyr does his best to make it up to Skwisgaar, but obvious damage has been done.

- Skwisgaar’s real father is never revealed and it’s quite popular in town to make theories about which gorgeous God Skwisgaar is the bastard of. (Adonis is a popular choice)

Toki

- Toki being the only son of the cruel King Aslaug, a malevolent leader of a deteriorating village. Toki is a small/weak boy for his age and is constantly beaten, belittled, and humiliated by his father, and therefore has no respect from the village people despite being the rightful heir. 

- He ends up accidentally killing a young bully his age (son of a noble man) in blind rage because he has certain freak episodes (episodes that likely led to his parents fearing/hating him??). (This is almost exactly what happened to Patroclus in TSOA) 

- He’ s exiled from his home, loses his family name, and is sent to be a ward of King Tyr and lives with various other abandoned orphans/exiled princes in Skwisgaar’s father’s rich, plentiful kingdom. 

NOW the fantastic slow-burn begins. Because Toki can’t seem to fit in with the other boys and there are constant rumors about how he beat a kid to death for such petty reasons and the rest of the kids are scared of him and keep their distance. 

aLL BUT SKWISGAAR! (and fuck i keep almost writing Achilles)

Who finds the new foreign boy utterly fascinating and is inexplicably drawn to him. 

Skwisgaar is obviously popular with the fellow boys for he is a tall, strong child destined for greatness, and he basks in this fact. 

Now I see Skwisgaar skipping training/class to wander off and play with a golden lyre in some hidden spot in the nearby woods.

The same spot Toki escapes to to avoid the blatant stares and loneliness. He’s shocked for a moment to see the golden prince lounging serenely on his favorite spot surrounded by flowers. But he’s stopped in his tracks after hearing Skwisgaar’s masterful Lyre playing and is absorbed in the music. He remember how, during his cold lonely years back home, an old wooden lyre was his favorite escape. 

Skwisgaar spots him and is not surprised to see how this young boy is amazed by his playing because everyone is. He’s a Lyre God. But he is surprised when the young boy timidly asks, 

“Cans I tries it?”

No one has ever had the audacity to interrupt him mid-play or the confidence to play anything that could match him. However, he’s amused and has been watching this new kid for a while, so he beckons him over and lets him play a song. 

NOW THIS IS THE MOMENT! The moment Skwisgaar is sHOOK by how Toki’s fingers glide across the instrument and the gorgeous sounds he makes. It’s not exactly like Skwisgaar’s, but it’s something entirely his own. Something gut-wrenching and heartbreaking. And Skwisgaar feels something he has never felt before for any music other than his own. 

And they end up sneaking off often and spending their free time like this, playing Lyre together and barely speaking. Eventually Skwisgaar tells his step-father he has chosen Toki to be his partner/right-hand-man (bc they did that in Greece, forgot what it was called??) and Toki is shocked and happy and can’t believe for once in his life he can be near the first person that’s ever made him so happy in his life. 

Then obviously the growing up together thing !!!

- Toki becomes stronger and truly grows into himself. He’ll never have Skwisgaar’s natural swiftness of foot or affinity for combat, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t try. 

- Skwisgaar is originally jealous of/shocked/impressed/aroused by how muscular/toned Toki grows up to become, but he constantly lords his impressive height over Toki

There’s so much more I feel is too much to add!!! 

But the other mtl ppl too:

- NATHAN AS ODYSSEUS!! PLS AND THANK

- Murderface or Pickles would actually be a really cool Chiron (a satyr who has trained many Greek heroes)

- Abigail as Briseis !!! (wont talk too much about her role bc TSOA spoilers)

- I’m not sure yet who Charles would be but he definitely has a place in this AU!!!

- mAgNuS iS hECToR !!!ii!!Ii!!

And the boys have so many obstacles in the way of their relationship, society/expectations/responsibilities/themselves. And it’s hard and painful but so worth it as long as they have each other. 

And stuff happens and the Trojan war breaks out...

I have so many thoughts for what happens to them, but ugh it’s too much to put in words almost. Just, I can’t help but think of these quotes from the book?!?! They scream Skwistok to me

“I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.” ― Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles

“He smiled, and his face was like the sun.” ― Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles

and another quote that i can’t put up bc if i do ever get around to writing this i want it to be a heartbreaking shock bc just thinking about it makes me tear up LOL

Even re-imagining versions of these quotes in their broken english makes my heart hurt !!! 

Just asadasfsd

end rant, I hope to add more to this AU in the future

ANd pls if any of you writers are inspired by these ramblings at ALL pls feel free to write something with this AU. Because i crave Ancient Greek Skwistok fics so much

[bokunoheroimagines]

Can I request Deku, Iida, and Todoroki's reactions when a business course student comes up to them during the break at the sports festival and says she has a crush on them? (I'm so sorry if that's worded in a weird way orz)

((hey everyone it’s me ive been in the worlds worst downward slump so how else to deal with it than writing cute stuff and putting it on the internet))

((also under the cut bc it’s long))

Midoriya was exhausted. As it turns out, breaking your bones multiple times in a fight only feels alright when you’re on an adrenaline high, and actually hurts way too much immediately afterward. So when an unfamiliar person holding a clipboard scurried into the infirmary and sidled up to his bed, he felt a little out of it and very confused.

“Um, Midoriya Izuku?”

He blinked, slowly. Did he actually know you? “Er, yes?”

You seemed relieved. He looked pretty dead, so his response must have been good to hear. “I’m [Name], from class 1-G.” The business course, Midoriya thought to himself. That’s why he didn’t recognize you. You forged onwards, the confidence of an entrepreneur painting your words. “While I have been familiar with you for some time, this festival is the first time I’ve seen you go up against another person. You were an impressive force, despite your loss.”

Midoriya realized what this must have been about. He’d overheard some upperclassmen talking about how business course students tried to become agents for hero students, and they usually started after the festival. Midoriya suddenly felt very nervous.

“Ah, I’m flattered, but I’m not really sure I’d like an agent…”

You blinked, eyebrows furrowing. Now that he was truly awake, Midoriya noticed you were quite cute. His nervousness spiked immediately. “Agent? No, no, I’m not here for a business deal! Sorry if I came off that way, but I’m here for something quite different.” Your face seemed to tint red, and your hands drifted to play with the hem of your shirt.

His eyes drifted to follow your motions, failing to notice how hard you were blushing. “What… what are you here for, then?”

“I like you!” You blurted, having lost any semblance of the composure you had when you’d first entered the infirmary. “I think you’re really cool! Even though you lost your last fight it was really impressive and you’re really cute and I like you!!”

If Midoriya’s face was warm before, now it was comparable to Todoroki’s newfound flames (which, at this point, Midoriya was starting to feel the aftermath of). A strangled noise came out of him while he did everything in his power to avoid eye contact with you, but you maintained your gaze with all the power of any top hero. You were frazzled and still messing with your shirt, but your voice did not waver when you spoke next.

“So that’s my pitch. What do you think, Midoriya?”

Iida knew that the Sports Festival was going to be a day of intense competition, strong wills, and strenuous physical activity. What Iida didn’t know about that day was that he was going to go from top of the world to rock bottom in a matter of hours.

It was after the obstacle race that you approached him, powerwalking in a way that almost reminded him of himself. You caught him mid-orange-juice, but he glanced toward you while taking a swig to indicate that he’d listen to whatever you had to say. When you opened your mouth to speak, though, he was totally unprepared for your words.

“My name’s [Name] from the business course, class 1-G, and I think you’re really hot!”

Iida thought spit takes only happened in the movies, but the orange juice painting the air in front of him proved otherwise. Really he was just thankful you’d been standing to his side. “I-I beg your pardon?!”

Despite his horrible display of rudeness, you kept speaking to him with zeal. “Honestly, I’ve thought you were interesting since the Emergency Exit incident, but the race really cemented it for me. You’re really cool! I want to get to know you better, even if you don’t feel as strongly for me! Does that sound like something you’d be interested in?”

His hands felt clammy. Iida didn’t have much experience with confessions, but here you were, staring at him eagerly. You were direct, interested in him, and, Iida admitted to himself, very attractive. Finally, Iida mustered up the words that he wanted to say next.

“I-If that’s the case, then would you like to attend a movie with me this weekend? The theater by the station is showing an American Hero film, if you’d like to see it.”

Your eyes lit up, but before you could respond, Midnight’s voice came over the loudspeaker, summoning all qualifying students to the field for the next task. Iida looked back at you hesitantly, but you waved him off.

“I’ll come find you afterwards and give you my phone number. You have a festival to win!”

Iida turned pink at the thought of you giving him your phone number. “Y-Yeah!!”

It was after the Battle Royale that Iida got a call from his mother, filling his heart with fear and grief. He left the Sports Festival early, and sprinted to the hospital where his brother lay, injured and barely conscious.

Iida did not get your phone number that day.

Iida had hit rock bottom.

It was immediately after getting a new shirt that Todoroki noticed you, idling in the hall and mumbling to yourself. He paid it no mind, instead focusing on his hands as he walked past you, checking for signs of burns or frostbite. But your voice, loud and clear like a bell, stopped him in his tracks.

“Wait!”

Todoroki turned to face you, only now actually getting a glimpse of you. You had on a sticker, indicating your name and class, and were actually pretty cute. Well, Todoroki wasn’t gonna let that mess with his day. He had a point to prove.

But first, he supposed he had to answer you. “Yes?”

You seemed almost surprised that he’d responded, but picked yourself back up quickly. As expected, Todoroki thought, of a business student. “You were really cool against Midoriya. Well, that other guy too, but…” You seemed lost, but Todoroki knew it would be rude to interrupt. “A-Anyway, I just think you’re cool, and now just seemed like an opportune time to let you know my feelings.”

He quirked an eyebrow. “…Feelings?”

“Yes. I like you, Todoroki Shouto.”

Oh, so that’s what this was about. Todoroki had seen this happen in middle school sometimes, with love letters in someone’s shoe locker, or two students hiding behind the gym, red-faced. But things like this did not happen to Todoroki Shouto. Always so busy with training, detached from his classes, irreversibly scarred… Todoroki hadn’t received a confession since preschool, when a little girl decided she was going to marry him. That didn’t work out, of course, as preschool marriages often don’t, but the fact that this was the first real confession he’d gotten was… a bit more jarring than he’d originally thought.

You snapped him out of his spiral with that bell voice again. “I understand if you don’t feel the same way, but I felt like I had to make that known.”

“I don’t know you.”

Okay, that was harsh, he realized, looking at your face. He should probably reel it in, he’s not trying to start a fight here.

“We don’t actually know each other, really. I know your name and your class. You know… I fought well in the festival. I can’t return your feelings if I don’t know who you are.”

And that was that. You muttered something about understanding, and turned around, walking away dejectedly. Todoroki had no time for dating.

But you had looked at him so sweetly, and he found himself a little curious about you, and…

“If you’d like to eat lunch together sometime, that would be fine.” You stopped, and he took that as a sign to say something else. “We could try… being… friends. First, if you want.”

He was so awkward, that probably killed that option then and there, he thought. But when you turned your head just enough for him to see you smile, he felt a little better about it. “I’d like that. I’ll see you then.”

Todoroki Shouto had never really liked anyone, but if there’s one thing this day had taught him, it’s that there’s a first time for everything.

[fanesavin]

Name an animated Disney character that your character has the most in common with - explain why.

Okay, you can’t give me a question like this and not expect me to yell a bit about several characters because TBH I CAN AND I WILL because I’m a huge HUGE Disney fan like I still am at 20. I grew up loving these films so?? How can I NOT go off on one about it? But like, honestly Fane could be several since he’s an amalgamation of so many different sources and personality traits so I really can’t just give you one and say that’s the one best for him because… honestly I can’t?… Let me tell you this is 100% going to get long winded and no one will probably read it but hey what can you do?

Let’s start with the obvious choice, Lumière: charismatic, kind-hearted rebellious servant to the Beast; SUPER DUPER social and hospitable to all he meets with a tendency for disobeying the hard set rules in place by his superiors which tends to lead to controversy between him and those ranking above or possessing authority above him. Despite this, he’s likely the closest individual within the household itself (excluding Belle) to the Beast and the one chosen to provide advice in various measure. Lumière is Cogsworth’s foil considering cogsworth is a hard-fast rules clock himself. 

Often depicted as a chivalrous and generally successful romancer he’s also the one that the Beast goes to for love advice in dealing with his feelings for Belle i.e. that time he convinced the Beast the best way to make Belle happier would be to bestow the castle’s mahousive library upon Belle due to her love of reading and books. Add on top Lumière’s tendency towards flirtation and choice to speak in suave smooth tones it’s no real surprise that he’s immediately one of the main characters I’d say Fane has a lot in common with. Fane loves France, he’s lived there for practically a century at one point in his life and knows the language fluently.

Throw in Lumière’s fussiness and need for an event to look absolutely spectacular down to the nitty gritty details… Yep. I definitely see Fane in him as a character but his more superficial aspects.

Next, I have to mention Roger Radcliffe; bachelor songwriter living in his bachelor pad with his dalmatian Pongo bc how can I not mention Roger with Fane’s ridiculous adoration for dogs? I can’t really. Much like Roger Fane’s a workaholic and dedicates himself entirely to any piece of work or task he takes upon himself until he completes it to the ABSOLUTE best of his ability. 

The only reason he ends up meeting/marrying Anita is because for once he dragged himself away from work long enough to go on a walk with Pongo where he ironically gets soaked in the Lake after they both fall in (PARALLELS ANYWHERE TO ANOTHER FIRST MEETING AND TENDENCY AFTER THE FACT FOR SOMEHOW GETTING SOAKED? I’m looking at you Scully, yes you). Anyway, later on in the film Roger’s show to be a kind man who cares deeply for his family and pets and isn’t afraid to stand up against Cruella when it comes to the well-being of his family. So yes, Roger is definitely another character I see parallels with in regards to Fane.

On the dad note, you can’t miss Mufasa because I MEAN COME ON WHAT A DAD. Much like Mufasa Fane’s kind-hearted and playful and respects all creatures even those perceived as lower than himself. He’s not the sort of dad who’s all strictly business; often playing games with Zazu and shows a lot of affection with Rafiki happily hugging him before presenting Simba. Now, another reason I pick Mufasa is because of the royal connections the characters share: Mufasa is a king, Fane was a potential prince (the highest rank equivalent to a king in Transylvania when the principality still stood and wasn’t abolished) Mufasa is instructive and wise, taught by years of experience and instruction and his rule much like Fane’s time in charge of his own castle was a period of prosperity due to his reasonable and responsible approach to leadership taking the stance that every person must be respected for order to be maintained. Thus, Fane and Mufasa also share the understanding of responsibility and willingness to set aside personal gain to benefit those under his care.

Both are fiercely protective of their family, ready to throw themselves into danger to keep those he loves safe and ultimately if needs be sacrifice his life for those he loves – Fane’s love for his family and their well-being again, much like Mufasa’s far outweighs his own love for himself.

Another similarity between them is patience and their optimism - never giving up on hope even despite the obstacles that might come up and get in their way. This extends to betrayal- Mufasa unlike Simba with Kovu would never have banished someone from his life without having heard their explanation first which is another thing Fane does his best to mimic when people cross or hurt him. His issue arises when people hurt his family and loved ones, do that and it’s an entirely different story.

Tadashi comes up next: the epitome of a great big brother, nephew and student, always there when people need him and energetic with a sense of humour that can be silly and excitable. Both of them are goofy and have a great sense of humour.

He’s incredibly hard-working and doesn’t believe in ‘dead-ends’, there always has to be a way out. Again, Fane despite being born into his wealth– there’s no way he would have been able to maintain it over all these years considering his lifestyle if he hadn’t worked for it. Which is what he did, he went out and sought the necessary contacts to expand his network to keep his money flowing into the bank. Though Fane is more lax about such things he can be because he’s done the legwork in the past and it took a LOT of hard work to get where he is today. Fane values work to accomplish goals which is something he also adopts in his parenting style; if Dani wanted something they would have to work to earn it for themself unless it was a special occasion in which yes they would get their gifts generally without work.

Fane also feels like he carries the responsibility to be a good role-model for Dani, having to care for them alongside his progeny they are both gentle & understanding characters but also not afraid of scolding their younger family members or becoming upset with them. One difference between the two is how Tadashi when he gets frustrated he will show it, whereas Fane tends to internalise it. Much like Tadashi encourages Hiro Fane encouraged and supported Dani in all their endeavours.

They both also share the philosophy of “looking at things from a different angle” something that both tend to apply to solve their problems (Tadashi’s being trying to activate Baymax after 84 tests) and Fane’s being his attempts to help other people.

Alright, there’s no talking about parental figures without Delbert Doppler our wonderful pacifistic sort of smart useless scholar coming up? He let Jim and Sara stay in his home after their own inn got destroyed by pirates. He’s excitable and LOVES to make new discoveries and go exploring which is why he was so excited when they realised that Jim happened to find the map to TREASURE PLANET HOLY SHIT TREASURE PLANET, yes. This is very much what Fane gets like when there’s a new discovery in a field he’s interested in. They also both don’t take too kindly to insults, though Fane takes it a bit better than Del does.

Then how can I NOT mention Kala, like calm, gentle, kind loving Kala who adores Tarzan so unconditionally despite knowing he would never replace her firstborn (incidentally killed by Sabor). Despite her tendency towards displaying a calm rational behaviour she’s capable of aggression when provoked to it and is also super brave when she faces Sabor again to protect a young Tarzan.

Bing Bong comes up next because we’ve talked a lot of positives and we need a bit of angst thrown in here to even it up, okay so Bing Bong when we meet him is drifting around Long Term Memory collecting happy memories in his bottomless bag. Bing Bong severely misses his time shared with Riley and was so utterly desperate not to be forgotten which is when he runs into Joy & Sadness who got themselves ejected from HQ. The reason I put Bing Bong on here is because to be honest Fane’s greatest fear is being forgotten by people, by not being memorable or important enough to be considered or given a reason to be recalled ESPECIALLY by people he loves or considers close friends. This is part of what played into him seeking out immortality; to have a way to literally build up his own legacy and history to be something worthwhile and memorable.

In this case the largest instance of this feeling comes in terms of Dani; who is a great source of both love but also anxiety considering in watching them grow up and move on in their life (a fact that he accepts needs to happen) he can’t help but feel like he’s being left behind in a way by them as they seem to move ever further away from home and in turn him with Sam. He by no means holds it against them knowing they are an adult now, but much like Bing Bong sort of felt himself fading away in terms of their memory. And just ugh I get emo over Bing Bong fading into oblivion.

Other characters that remind me of Fane: Prince Charming (Cinderella), Jack Skellington (The Nightmare Before Christmas) Tigger (Winnie the Pooh) due to his eccentric tendencies and overly energetic enthusiasm for things, he means well but his tendency to view himself as the only tigger in existence has led to a little bit of ego. The notable thing is this ego is never meant to be intentionally malicious, but occasionally can frustrate people and Jiminy Cricket (Pinocchio).

[louiseblue1]

Marc said he could never kill Thea being the last relative of Oliver. On Felicity said she would never wear a suit because she is already a hero, a costume would make her laugh. Made this clarification. I also think that Felicity might be dead or go back with a lesser role. MG when asked if Emily had signed the contract he replied that he was discussing. It came up months ago. And if Emily no longer had a contract as regular, but just as a recruiter, like Willa in s5. That's what I'm afraid of

No, MG confirmed to Jen in one of their talks which she shared with us that they’d never kill off Felicity (correct me if I’m wrong in remembering that @jbuffyangel  ) . I’m pretty sure I’ve read it in other interviews with him as well. MG has repeatedly said they are not going to kill off Felicity. He even laughs at the very suggestion because he knows he’s built their entire show around Felicity. Arrow was struggling before introducing Felicity. With her they found their feet. They have freely admitted that over and over and over and over again. You don’t kill off the thing which saved your show. You just don’t. And you don’t put them in the back seat and reduce their role. Not unless EBR asked them too, but again, they wouldn’t have continued to build Oliver’s story around her if that was the case. 

Look, I made the call early on about LL being killed, because I could see it clearly coming with how they were writing her out of Oliver’s story. If you’re not linked to Oliver’s story and don’t have anything going on with your own, and there is someone that is being set up as having both of those things, then you have to worry about that character. Felicity is the total opposite. She is at the heart and core of Oliver’s story. They haven’t moved away from that. And that’s why I’m 100000000000% confident they will not kill Felicity. I’m even more sure of that than I was that LL was being killed off, and I was very sure about that. 

If Olicity had gotten together for good in S3, then there would be potentially more to worry about. Another 4 years of storytelling opens up real possibilities of pulling apart that relationship. The very fact that they’ve slowed down the relationship to play out more beats and have us wait on the wedding/babies etc GUARANTEES us that Felicity or Oliver aren’t going to die. That’s how the flow of stories work. It’s hard to explain if you can’t see it for yourself. It’s kind of like explaining rhythm to someone who doesn’t have it. I can see the rhythm of this storytelling, and I’m telling anyone who wants to listen that they’ll never kill off Felicity because the narrative simply doesn’t support it. It’s not that kind of story. 

I find this worry about killing off Felicity to be a very odd one. Of all the things to worry about on Arrow, that’d be the absolute last one. I clearly can’t stop anyone from worrying about it if they really want to, but I’d just like to point out that I was right about LL dying, I was right about Olicity not being over and reuniting, I was right about GA/BC or GA/BS not being a thing on the writer’s radar. I’m not saying that to brag, I’m saying that in the vain hope that you’ll believe me when I say not to worry about Felicity dying. I told you all it was a waste of energy to worry about Billy and Susan, and that Felicity wasn’t going to get pregnant by Billy and Oliver wouldn’t become second best to Felicity and all the other things people found to get worked up and worried about, and I was right. It was a big old waste of time. Because none of those things fit the story being told. They were never going to happen. Felicity dying is never going to happen. 

Oh, and I’d just like to point out that I was also right about some people not being able to relax and enjoy Olicity’s story, even when they’re together, and here we are. There is a difference about being nervously excited about how Olicity are going to find each other and still believing we’re being pranked by the writers and that they’re never going to follow through. Some people will never have faith in the writers for reasons that feel valid to them (which is fine) but like I’ve said many times before, you’ll always be coming up with these kinds of scenarios because you don’t believe what the writers are telling you, which means you’ll never get to enjoy Olicity. 

I said when they reunited, some people would still fret and that is what is happening. And again, when they marry, those same people will still fret because they’re still equating ‘going with Olicity’ as them having no drama or obstacles to overcome. So, any drama or challenges means the writers are backing away from Olicity. Those people have to let go of that concept because it’s destroying what entertainment Arrow has to offer when it comes to Olicity. That is not how the writers roll with these characters. They will always give them challenges and the very fact that they’ve given Olicity a new challenge to overcome shows how committed they are to the couple, and not the opposite, as some folks seem intent on trying to make out. More drama for Olicity means they’re meant to be and they will be. 

I’m sorry that I sound so obnoxious in this post with all the ‘I told you so’s’. I’m aware I sound like a dick. But beyond the dickish delivery of my message, the message is a good one. If you can’t rewire your brain to think like the writers think and understand their way of telling a story, then you’re always going to be stressed watching Arrow and I find that a real shame because Arrow is like the easiest show in the world to watch to me. Their overall narrative is so obvious, but the plot points they use to tell the story often surprise me. That’s a great combination of having a thrilling ride but knowing you’re completely safe. If you don’t believe in the writers then you’ll never feel completely safe and you’ll flinch at every little twist and turn, not realising you and your ship are utterly safe. That’s always a sad thought for me. :/

[franeridart]

I'm so glad Kirishima is getting so much spotlight, he really deserves it!!!! And it looks like hes gonna get more, since hes in the main group along with Deku, Uraraka and Tsuyu. I;m so hyped!!!

Honestly!!!!!!!!!!! That’s one interesting group tbh, Kirishima and Tsuyu’s interactions are always incredibly adorable to watch and seeing Kirishima interact for so long with pure and good people is gonna be hard on my heart (I mean, you know I’m 100% a bakusquad fan but they’re all at least in part assholes and Kiri fits with them just right, he can be just like Sero and Kaminari and I love it, but then his interactions with Amajiki have been so pure can you imagine an arc filled with that I’m already crying)

I just hope my other faves won’t completely disappear through this arc haha sigh

Anon said: So which Kacchan quote do you like best "Die your bacteria fucks, dieee!" or "BRING YOUR DAMN TRASH TO ME"?

LMAO SORRY ANON BUT MY FAVE GOTTA BE

WHAT A GODDAMN DISASTER THIS BOY IS

Anon said:there's a terushima week. thought i might tell you bc i miss you drawing him ;3; might wanna join? :3

Anon said:Terushima week is this next week! (@terushimaweek) Might we maaaybe see some cute lil bokuroterus sometime soon? ;)

As I’ve already said, sadly I’ve found out about this too late to be part of it - I’m not completely ruling out the possibility of doodling something one of the days, but I didn’t have the time to plan anything and I’m still in the middle of working things through with the bakushima week and bakugou’s birthday so I don’t know - they 19th is Teru’s birthday so maybe I’ll draw something for it, but it’s also a super busy day for me so it really depends on how soon I’ll be able to finish everything else I’m working on orz I’m sorry guys I seriously had no clue about this till, like, five days ago o

Anon said: What are your thoughts on KiriDeku b/c I'm not even that into it but as soon as I saw art I was like "OMFG I DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING SO PURE CHOULD EVER EXIST!!!" My following thought was that'd you may have something interesting to say (as you always do, I luv it), so here I am 😁 Also, I love the blog, your amazing art, and you!! I truly appreciate all you do ❤️❤️

Awwww thank you!!! And I dunno, as things are now my opinion on a possible ship might change soon enough because it looks like their interactions amount is about to skyrocket, so anything I say right now is just a temporary answer? But generally I find their friendship incredibly adorable, though as of now I don’t think I can see anything romantic between the two... mostly because even though I’ve seen them being friendly and supportive of each other I don’t think I’ve ever seen them actually connect over anything that wasn’t Bakugou?? Being friendly and supportive is just how they both are with everyone, before I can say I ship them I’m gonna need something more singular to their relationship

I might be totally biased here considering where my main shipping lies, though haha

Anon said:HOSHIHINA!!!! YESSSSS!!!! PLEASE!!!!!! I think this is like.... my new OTP or well... a new OTP that I will gratefully put on the shelf next to all my other children in love!! oh yeah and THANK YOU for introducing me to both BNHA and d grey man! I'M IN LOVE!!! oH and YOUR ART IS AMAZING!!! KEEP IT UP!! I WILL GRATEFULLY SWALLOW UP ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING YOU POST IT'S AMAZING!!! YOUR OC'S TOO!!! Have a nice day!!

So much!!! HYPE in this ask!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!! Oh my gosh!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you so much for EVERYTHING anon I hope you’ll have the best day!!!!!! *O* And I’m SUPER GLAD you gave dgm and bnha a try!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:Aww the kiss. I know you posted it the other day, but it wouldn't load on my tablet. They're so cute, those two. 💜✌

*lays down forever* they are aren’t they those pure idiots !!!!

Anon said:I'm laughing so hard. Literally everyone that read the new chapter was like expectation vs reality. I love my idiots. Also yas to HoshiHina

HoshiHina is an A+ ship with A+ potential and I think I’m being slowly but surely swallowed by it - then again, what Hinata ship don’t I ship even ??? the mysteries

Anon said:To answer you question on what cheese sticks are, they're this disgusting processed cheese stick, also known as string cheese, and it's p much what it is, cheese in the form of a small stick that you can pull apart into strings and eat like that! (as you may have noticed, I'm not a fan hah) ((I don't know if you know the artist mookie, but she made a comic about bokuto eating a cheesestick whole before)

Anon said: cheese sticks = string cheese? D: they are delicious i promise

I’m seeing conflicting reports here (lol) but yes this might be a problem for me only because as I said I’m Italian but what I’m failing to see here is what kind of cheese are these things supposed to be ???

Anon said:Are you into Kuroken?

Only as very good friends, I don’t ship it romantically at all

Anon said:I love your bakushimas, SO SO SO MUCH. God, and with the latest chapter, I just can't wait for more interactions with them. God, seeing as I think Kirishima was filmed by the people that were there, I want to see Bakugou's reaction to his new move.

This took me long enough to answer that we now know Baku’s reaction was total and utter envy at how popular Kiri is LMAO - but yeah I still think Baku already knew about Kiri’s new move! After all he most probably came up with it as they trained for the license exam and I can’t believe he wouldn’t test it against Bakugou to make sure he actually turns unbreakable? Also proud-of-himself Kiri yelling at the squad to check out his new move is too much of a good image I can’t let that one go hahaha

Anon said:I started following you for Haikyuu but started boku no hero academia in order to understand what your other drawings were so I thank you (and blame you) for getting me hooked on another anime and manga :)

I’m!!!!!! HAPPY you ended up liking it???!!!! *O*

Anon said:I just wanted to tell you that you're my most fave artist here in tumblr istg i go to your page everyday just to go back at the fanart you drew if you didn't have any new, but when u have, my heart just swells and i fuss over it. God bless you because you opened my eyes for bakushimanari when i was just kiribaku back then.. God i love denki sfm right now bc of you, im sad bkk week is over though ahh and laven. Jfc i love your laven pls draw them more if u can 😘 i hope you'll have a great day!!

Don’t!!!! worry anon Laven has been my #1 otp since I was sixteen at this point it’s just not gonna leave me ever, I’ll definitely draw more of it in the future! And thank you??? so much?????? Oh man!!!!!

Anon said:Everyone in class 1-A: *trains as if they're gonna be in a battle royal and need to (literally) slaughter the competition* Competition: OBSTACLE RACE YAY

Well, the anime did change the training scenes a lot lol but LMAO anon they’re highschoolers what were you expecting hahahahaha it’s already savage enough as it is, I assure you lol

Anon said:Hi hello yes are you up for some angsty stuff because my brain turns even the sweetest moment to that, like what if kaminari saw bakushima's first kiss and he becomes so sad b/c he crushes on them both but he pretends not to and starts teasing 'em like a true bro while hiding his feelings and idk it's only if you want but yeah, how's your day been?

..........I would lie if I said I didn’t think about this while drawing that kiss R I P my multishipper heart is gonna kill me BUT IT’S OKAY I’m not one for unhappy endings so consider this - Denki sees them kiss, since he’s best bro and both Kirishima and Bakugou tend to wear their hearts on their sleeves he already knew this was gonna happen so he’s like, sad but resigned it hurts and he wishes he didn’t have to see it but he loves them both so much that he can’t help but being happy for how happy they are at the same time too (sure, being part of that happiness would be a dream coming true, but he’s used to never coming first he can deal with this hahahahaha r i p)

Meanwhile a bit after the kiss once Kiri is a hundred per cent sure Bakugou isn’t going to explode his head off if he mentions his very huge crush on Kaminari he does and Bakugou’s like, shit, it’s not like he’d mind it because Kaminari is, well, he’s Kaminari and Bakugou isn’t sure why but he’s comfortable to be around and easy to talk to and he’s stupidly pretty and like, yeah, okay, he might be into him too, maybe, he isn’t admitting anything here (not like he needs to, as stated already he’s pretty easy to read), but Kaminari’s also the no homo type of het so it’s not like they can do much about this threeway crush or whatever, and Kirishima’s like sure, I know, I just wanted to be open about this to avoid trouble, which is very sensible and will cut us on a lot of miscommunication angst this is getting out of hand let’s skip ahead I always forget how much fun I have writing this kind of bullshit

For however much Kaminari swore he could deal with it and how much he’s actually managing to deal with it he’s also the same brand of open book Baku and Kiri are and while it was easy to act like friends with no romantic feelings when everyone was doing the same, trying to hide from Bakugou and Kirishima while they’re openly in a relationship turns out to be more or less impossible, mostly because he can’t seem to avoid the longing stares and sad smiles and the I have to go I just remembered I have a thing to do bye’s when it becomes too much, and Kirishima might not be the brightest but he’s perfectly in tune with everyone’s feelings and Bakugou might stomp on people’s feelings more often than not but he is the brightest which means they notice and they’re like god fucking damn it - Bakugou in nature isn’t one to talk about problems until they burst out in fits of anger, but thank god he’s got Kirishima right there and they might not be 100% sure they got the reason for Kaminari’s weirdness right but they’re exasperated and they at least want their friend to stop being weird and avoiding them, they miss him (and Kaminari seriously misses them too he feels so stupid for how big of a deal he’s turning this into) SO they corner him and talk it out cause I’m a slut for open and honest communication and Kaminari straight out starts crying from happiness and relief before they’re even done talking and Kirishima starts crying right after him because sympathetic crier supreme and Bakugou’s like you know what I changed my mind fuck both of you emotional disasters I’m out

(spoiler he isn’t really)

[bygoneboy]

passengers (2820)

one week before hyperion reaches habitat 7, the pathfinder team is brought out of cryogenic stasis. their first obstacle: shouldering the weight of what they’ve left behind.

scott ryder/liam kosta. 5886 words, sfw, falling in love over improper use of the tempest group chat. written for fun 15 days before andromeda’s launch so everything is Probably Very Wrong

DISCLAIMER: this fic is not based explicitly on the andromeda gameplay that’s been revealed so far, but there are still a few canon bits hidden here and there. if you don’t want to read spoilers then please don’t read.

The first thing Liam Kosta thinks after six-hundred years of cryogenic stasis is: Am I awake?

And then, when it’s apparent that he is: We made it, right? Did we make it?

And after that he isn’t thinking much of anything but thank God, thank God– are the others–? Oh my God, thank God, because no amount of experience in the field could really prepare anybody for something like this, and they’d known that going in.

SAM had brought Doctor T’Perro out of cryo first, and she spends a few more minutes helping a blurry-eyed Lieutenant Harper find her balance before she turns to Liam. His joints are stiff and creaky as hell but he’d expected that much; he doesn’t feel too terribly groggy, his speech isn’t coming slow. It had been like a cold bucket of water to the face, waking up. And a bit like the spine-tremor feeling of falling and being caught, right before impact. He remembers going under like it was yesterday. He feels sort of sick despite himself, recalling how long ago yesterday really was.

Nothing could’ve prepared him for this, either, the impossibly absolute realization– a few relay jumps, six centuries of AI-navigated-drifting. Quick as the pop of a flash grenade, and the world they’d left behind is dead and gone.

It’d come up a lot during training, of course, they’d said no regrets, no attachments, say good-bye to everyone you know. Take count of what you leave behind, they’d said, and Liam had straightened up and done his best. He’d made peace with family, friends, everyone who mattered and a few that didn’t. He’d called up every ex he’d ever had, just to say– you know, whatever heart-felt sort of things had come to mind, it was nice. Or even if it hadn’t been nice, you were real to me, and I knew you, and you knew me. And by the next conscious month of my life you’ll be dead, your grandchildren will be dead, your great-great-grandchildren might be alive, depending on the progression of human medical advancements, and I’ll be eons away still feeling like I’m twenty-five.

Don’t let it get to you, they’d said; “Keep still for me,” says T’Perro, and tugs at his chin with her thumb and forefinger.

She sweeps the omni-tool past his eyes in a slow horizontal line. The bright spots stay etched into his eyes even after she lowers the beam. T’Perro’s face was the last thing he’d seen before cryo-sleep had kicked in, and the first thing he’d seen waking up. Six-hundred years. Yesterday. Still feels like yesterday.

He needs to focus on breathing. The rise and fall of his chest, lungs expanding and contracting. He ticks through every piece of advice he’d ever given to shock victims back during his work in the field, how he’d broken them from their glassy-eyes and sagging mouth. “Naturally,” T’Perro says, when he admits to feeling light-headed. She doesn’t seem too sympathetic, and considering the length of asari lives, he’s not sure she could empathize even if he did try to explain. “It’ll pass,” she says instead, matter-of-fact, patting his arm, putting away her equipment. “You’ll have more pressing things to worry about soon. I would tell you it’s imperative to be emotionally vulnerable, but I’ve read your file.”

There’s a lot in his file. “What’re you saying, doc?”

“That you know about vulnerability. Speaking as your psychologist, I’m not sure you’ll need me.”

“And speaking as my physician?”

T’Perro looks amused. “You’ve been asleep for six-hundred years, Kosta,” she says. “You can count on feeling a little sore.”

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD]

SARARYDER: good morning sleepyheads!! is everyone up?!?

CORAHARPER: up and feeling good

LIAMKOSTA: ready for whatever’s out there

SARARYDER: scott where are u!! answer!!

SCOTTRYDER: This isn’t a personal communication channel, Sara. We’re only supposed to use this to share important information with the Pathfinder’s ground crew.

SARARYDER: :P

SARARYDER: blocked unfollowed

SARARYDER: anyway

SARARYDER: does the hyperion’s coffee taste like the bottom of a batarian shoe to anyone else

SARARYDER: or is it just me

…

Their long-range scans have given them a rough map of the area. They’d notified SAM to wake the Pathfinder and his crew about a week before reaching the first potentially habitable planet, to give the ground team time to prepare and everyone else a minute to breathe. Now that he’s awake, though, Liam sort of wishes that he wasn’t, that they hadn’t.

They’ve arrived in Andromeda thirty-four years late.

“Oh, what the hell,” says Harper, both of their jumpsuits unzipped around their waists, sweating through their tank tops in the drive core as they examine one of the ship’s fried engines. “What’s a few more decades under our belt, right?”

He knows she’s just trying to make light of it, keep her head up. It’s not like they can do anything about it now. But Liam has to bite down to keep his worry behind his teeth: the Hyperion will run out of energy eventually. And what if every one of their golden planets has already been settled? What if there somehow isn’t room for them? What if– 

“Hey, are you just gonna sit there and watch?” Harper snaps him out of it with a well-aimed jab to his abdomen. “This strip-tease isn’t for you,” she says, flexing one bare, well-muscled arm, “could you try to make yourself useful?”

He pretends to hit her over the head with the wrench.

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD]

SARARYDER: oh my god guess what you guys

SARARYDER: i was talking to sam this morning and i found out

SARARYDER: i am officially THE OLDER TWIN

SARARYDER: i came out of cryo 2 MINUTES BEFORE SCOTT

CORAHARPER: i don’t think it works that way

LIAMKOSTA: congrats?

SCOTTRYDER: Sara, why do you have to break up your messages like that? You know you can type everything out all at once, right?

SARARYDER: sorry baby bro

SARARYDER: am

SARARYDER: i

SARARYDER: bugging

SARARYDER: you

SCOTTRYDER: There has to be a way to mute this channel.

SARARYDER: if i know i aint tellin

…

Their Pathfinder calls them all together at 0600 and 2100 hours every day for short briefings, but there isn’t really much to say, not yet anyway. Mostly he gives ship status updates, answers questions if they have any, and reminds them to check in with T’Perro as often as they need. Alec Ryder has a practiced steadiness to him, the kind that reflects age and experience. He’s a bit of a hard-ass, the sort who’s fought fair and square for the right to be one. Beyond his military record and N7 credentials, Liam doesn’t actually know much about him– or about his son and daughter.

The fact that they were Alec’s blood hadn’t mattered during training. Most things hadn’t mattered during training, apart from what they were there to do, whether or not they could reave as well as they could shoot, how well they could work together. At face value the twins are joined at the hip: Sara is bright-eyed and approachable, she smiles easy, she’s passionate. Harper makes the mistake of asking about her work in Prothean research and Sara talks her ear off for two hours; later the same day Liam finds her trying to teach SAM what a joke is. He isn’t sure she gets any further than an asari, a turian, and a krogan walk into a bar.

She probably should’ve thought about trying it out on her brother first.

Scott calls his father sir, he smiles but it’s tight at the edges. Maybe base camp had kicked all the happiness out of it, maybe Alec had. But someone must’ve said drop and give me twenty one time too many, because apparently Scott’s face has stuck that way.

He catches him staring off into space during more than one briefing, fixed on something distant outside the conference room viewport window; sometimes there’s a look in his eyes that he can’t seem to place, far-away, dazed, like he’s been sleeping for another six centuries longer than the rest of them. Like he’s constantly cycling back to re-remembering where he is, two million light years from the galaxy where they’d began.

Sometimes he notices Liam noticing.

Which is how Liam learns that the Pathfinder’s son flushes as easily as Sara smiles.

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD]

SCOTTRYDER: Can I get a status update from everyone?

CORAHARPER: habitat 7 shuttle is ready to go and everything should be running smooth down in engineering. liam finished repairs on the drive core last night

SCOTTRYDER: Great. Thanks, you two.

LIAMKOSTA: nbd, glad to help

SCOTTRYDER: Sara?

SARARYDER: yeah uh watch out dad’s in a mood

SARARYDER: he actually yelled at me this morning for agreeing with him

SARARYDER: he’s just pissed off bc i used up all the ship’s hot water when i showered yesterday

SARARYDER: and then he had to take an ice bath lol

SCOTTRYDER: Sara, seriously.

SARARYDER: ok fine one of the relays almost exploded but i fixed it, no sweat, ur welcome

…

On his down-time– and there’s a lot of it– Liam takes his protein bars, does his two hours of fitness, and showers. He’s started rearranging his locker, to keep himself busy, but they hadn’t really brought a lot with them. There’s really not much to move around, so when he’s tired himself out doing that he starts polishing his guns. And when he’s scrubbed his cartridges clean to the point of wear and tear he gets Harper to let him have a go at hers.

Eventually he runs out of distractions. 

He starts thinking again.

Six-hundred years is a long time, even without being thirty-four years behind schedule. By the time they go planet-side, whoever’s already settled in will have passed them up with advancements far beyond their own. They’re at a disadvantage. There’s nothing they can do about it.

Six hundred years is a long time.

He shouldn’t be thinking about it. Which means he can’t stop thinking about it. T’Perro is right; he knows vulnerability. He’s been witness to all kinds of anxieties and fears, he’s equipped to wall off panic and reinstall calm, order, breathe. Go back to the start, why he’d joined the Initiative in the first place:

New beginnings, and the good of the galaxy.

For exploration, for progress and purpose, for the vast expanse of space that he’d dreamed of when he was young. Gazing out from the Citadel’s docking bay, staring up from London bridges, wondering where the stretch of stars ended. Where new worlds began.

For heroes, and everything they’d fought for.

He’d first heard of the Initiative while he was still working crisis response; his HUS-T1 squad had crossed paths with an Alliance support team and the plan for Andromeda had come up in the lapses between cycles. So much had sounded like a pipe dream back then– Reapers, Pathfinders– the sort of things that people talked themselves in circles about, things that never actually happened. But later he’d gotten a call from Ryder himself. And Commander Shepard had started stirring up trouble in military circles around the same time, pushing Reaper lore and calling for strengthened defense around Luna base. And suddenly pipe dreams had been as real as anything.

By the time news of Shepard’s death broke over military channels, Liam had started his training.

He remembers– he’d watched the funeral broadcast in the bunkroom with the rest of the trainees, packed in a tight circle around someone’s datapad screen. The Alliance buried an empty box; they hadn’t recovered his body. Shepard would want us united, Hackett had said in his speech, now more than ever, Liam remembers that so clearly. Remembers how everyone had felt like the Admiral had been talking to them: stand together. The galaxy needs heroes.

Shepard hadn’t been married, he didn’t have family. So when they folded the Alliance flag into twelve they’d handed it over to Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, and then the cameras had cut away– but not before everyone saw him bring the flag to his lips, and then his heart.

The galaxy needs heroes, said Hackett. And something to live for.

He’s pretty sure everyone in the Alliance had been a little in love with the commander. His military record was an inspiration, the guy himself could charm the armor off of a varren. Most of the squads Liam worked with followed every move he made, every interview he gave; Shepard showed one ounce of interest in a new brand of omni-tool and suddenly they were sweeping the shelves. Shepard bought a Model 12 Locust and Kassa Fabrications sold out of them the day after. The man couldn’t sneeze without someone scanning the area for leftover heat signals.

So there were always rumors floating around, fiction-based stories spread around in heavily commercialized pulp magazines and weeklies. Commander Shepard: Double Life As An Omega Stripper! Commander Shepard: His Secret Earth Gang Affiliation! Commander Shepard: Savior Of The Citadel Revealed To Be Half-Krogan!

Liam had tried to ignore them, for the sake of decent morality. But then the Collectors hit, and morality went murky for everyone, and Commander Shepard: Back From The Dead carried some real merit, real hope. 

And Commander Shepard: In League With Cerberus? ended up running clear too.

All-in-all, Commander Shepard: Heartbreak On Horizon! wasn’t the hardest thing to believe. 

Yeah, he read that one for sure, the guy who bunked across from him had sent a copy to him over the extranet. And he’d be lying if he said he didn’t find it at least a little bit thrilling, the idea of a love affair between Shepard and Alenko– the hero and the guy at his back, the soldier going to hell and back and the guy following him there. It probably wasn’t the most worthwhile thing he could’ve been doing with his time before lights-out, fantasizing over someone else’s very real, very dangerous, and very immediate life– but oh, man, that last issue had sure been something to keep a romantic up at night.

Not that it kept Liam up at night.

Much.

Not that it’s keeping him up now.

He’s always had a hard time sleeping in new spaces– in this case, in new space itself. And he’s learned that it’s better to get his brain focused on something else than to stay staring up at the ceiling, so he grabs his datapad, hauls himself out of his bunk, and wanders over to the mess hall. He figures he’ll dig around in the rations cupboard, find some freeze-dried ramen or something, read a little more Blasto.

Apparently, someone else has already had the same idea.

Scott is there when he walks in, his back to the door with one arm bracing the fridge open, staring into the shelves like the answer to geth-quarian peace is stuck somewhere behind the evaporated milk cartons. “Hey,” says Liam casually, and startles him so bad that his grip on the fridge door slips.

He steadies again, quick enough to keep it from slamming on his hand. But when he looks back up his shoulders have squared, body language tense and nervous. He rocks back on his heels. “Hey,” he says. 

“Can’t sleep?”

“Guess not. You?”

“Guess not,” says Liam.

They look at each other.

“Ryder,” SAM’s strange soft voice bursts static through the comm speakers, and they both flinch this time. “I’ve detected a significant change in your heat signature. Your heart-rate has also rapidly accelerated.”

“Wow. Uh–” Scott goes beet-red, eyes sliding away to a spot a foot above Liam’s head. “I’m good, SAM. I’m just– I’m great, thanks for, uh, sharing that, though.”

“Your well-being is my primary concern.”

“So you keep telling me.”

“Analysis of your tone of voice implies sarcasm.”

Scott huffs softly and turns back to the fridge. “Good catch,” he mutters, yanking out one of the packets of freeze-dried ice cream and letting the door slam shut with a gust of icy air. “Feel free to go offline anytime.”

“Remember, Ryder,” says SAM solemnly. “Those packets are individually rationed–”

“Anytime, SAM.”

There’s a quiet chirp as he deactivates. And then it’s just the hum of the fridge, and silence.

The ice cream packet crinkles in Scott’s hands. “Sorry. He can be–”

“Yeah,” says Liam, shrugging like whatever even though he’s feeling a little hot in the face himself, “don’t worry about it.” Scott is still flushed around the edges– soft edges, squared jaw. Stubble-patched and tired lines. Liam’s still not sure what color his eyes are. Light. Gray? But sometimes blue, reflecting whatever comes his way.

“Well,” says Scott, and clears his throat, “it’s late. I should– go.”

Liam almost laughs, wondering for half a second whether that’s supposed to be a line. But then he remembers who’s speaking; Scott Ryder is the last person who’d try to pick someone up in a mess hall at midnight. “Okay,” he answers, sliding into one of the chairs with his issue of Blasto pulled up on his datapad screen. “Have a good night, then.”

“Yeah, I’ll– see you around? I mean, of course I will, I’ll see you tomorrow. At the briefing,” He’s going a steady scarlet, white-knuckling his neapolitan like it’s to blame for everything. “You– take care, Kosta.”

It’s not the fastest retreat Liam has ever been witness to. You can’t spend time with Alliance soldiers and not see someone’s heels beating up dust in your wake.

It does, however, cut it very close.

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD] 

CORAHARPER: god i hope habitat 7 has better food than this

SARARYDER: what!? listen up that freeze dried imitation crab is to die for

CORAHARPER: yeah bc i’m more likely to die than enjoy it

SCOTTRYDER: Actually, the ice cream is pretty good too.

SARARYDER: oh my god stop the world my brother actually likes something

SCOTTRYDER: Shut up, Sara. I like plenty of things.

SARARYDER: okay fair

SARARYDER: for example

SARARYDER: you like sucking the joy out of life

LIAMKOSTA: and ending texts with periods

CORAHARPER: and staring at liam during briefings

SARARYDER: woooooow

SARARYDER: called tf out

LIAMKOSTA: that’s out of line, cora

CORAHARPER: is it though?

CORAHARPER: technically i outrank him

SCOTTRYDER: I don’t stare at anyone. I just get distracted sometimes.

SARARYDER: i’m lauhgin g

SARARYDER: ‘distracted’

CORAHARPER: sounds fake but okay

SARARYDER: cora pls

SARARYDER: cora i’m dying

LIAMKOSTA: are you sure that’s not the imitation crab talking, sara?

SARARYDER: ASDFGHJKL;

…

Living out of a shoebox means his whole world is in a locker, and maybe that’s why he keeps coming back to it. Dragging his things out onto the floor, scrubbing up to his elbow with an oil-stained cloth– for some reason, no matter how hard he works, it never seems any brighter when he stops to take a closer look.

He can think of a few real-life scenarios to apply that to.

“Hey,” Scott says, interrupting his train-wreck of thought and flipping his stomach over instead. “Do you have a minute?” He’s standing a good five feet back with his hands in his issued-Initiative-blues pockets, watching Liam sort through his stuff for what must be the fifth time at least– he would know if he was counting, he’s sort of trying not to, though.

“I’ve got more than a minute.” He wipes his palms on his thighs, then wipes them again when the sweat seems to stick. “What’s up?“

“Just trying to get a sense of where the crew’s at,” Scott says, eyeing up Liam’s ongoing project. “What– are you spring cleaning?”

“Whatever kills time,” Liam says wryly, lifting one shoulder, letting it drop. “How long until we hit Habitat 7?”

“T-minus three days. You ready?”

“Honestly, I’d feel underprepared no matter what. You can’t really be ready for something like this, right?”

“Right,” Scott echoes. “That’s…what I keep telling myself, anyway.” He shifts on his feet, restless, stiff-backed. At ease, Liam thinks, but whether or not it would help, he isn’t sure. “So, uh,” he gestures to the pile at Liam’s feet. “This is all you, huh. Give me the tour.”

He chuckles, but it sticks like the sweat. “Nothing impressive. Just a few things I grabbed from home, backed-up transmissions. I had my family and friends record some before we went under. Snagged some Corellian whiskey, too, and– oh, yeah–” He crouches down, fumbling for the Normandy model. “There’s this, heads-up–”

Scott catches it easy, one-handed. A spark of interest lights up behind his eyes as he turns it over between his palms, “Shepard’s ship?”

“Yeah!” says Liam, stupidly enthusiastic. “I mean, er– yeah. I don’t know why I grabbed it, it’s not great, like, practicality-wise…” He wipes at the back of his neck, feeling his face heat up. “It’s signed, it’s– got his signature. Not that I ever met him, the Alliance was auctioning it off at a fundraiser and I spent a quarter of my credit savings on it. Figured I wouldn’t need those here, anyway, so– you know? I thought, why the hell not.”

“You admire him.”

“I did.”

“Past tense,” says Scott.

He’s like that, Liam is learning. He really listens, pays attention, maybe more closely than’s good for anybody. His chest is tight, like it’s fit with armor two times too small. Shepard’s gone, he should say. They all are, everyone we knew. He’d known they’d be; he thought he’d been ready. But it just hadn’t hit him. Not until he woke up, and felt the weight of every century settle down somewhere in his gut.

Scott runs the tip of one finger over the starboard wing. “He was a good man,” he says, filling the space of Liam’s silence. “He had a good crew. What did you think about all that Reaper stuff, did you believe that?”

“Yeah,” Liam says quietly, “I believed it. I still believe it. Although I guess it isn’t really relevant anymore. Being– two million light-years away. And all that.”

“Not unless they’ve got Reapers here, too. You won’t be disappointed if we don’t find any, will you?”

Liam doesn’t laugh the same way Scott doesn’t smile; they both give it a try anyway. There’s common ground somewhere in the middle, there must be: a compromise, thick throats but steady hands. “Believe me,” he says. “I’m not holding my breath.”

“Me neither,” says Scott. “Not for that.”

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD]

SCOTTRYDER: Hey, Liam. I really enjoyed our chat yesterday. We should talk again soon.

SARARYDER: what??

SARARYDER: oh. OHO

CORAHARPER: is there a reason you’re posting this on the team forum

SARARYDER: ohhhh boy

SARARYDER: ohhhh man

SCOTTRYDER: I apologize, everyone. I meant to send that privately.

CORAHARPER: how come you never have these “chats” with me?

SARARYDER: CALL HIM OUT

LIAMKOSTA: down, harper. jesus, you two

LIAMKOSTA: i enjoyed talking to you too, scott

CORAHARPER: consider my feelings officially hurt

SARARYDER: i love u all so much pls never change

…

Alec Ryder begins the next day’s morning conference with a not-so-gentle reminder that there are, actually, individual rations on the freeze-dried ice cream.

And Habitat 7, he announces, with his arms folded firmly across his chest, will most likely not be stocked with the stuff.

So whoever’s been sneaking extra portions should know that once it’s gone, it’s gone for good.

The subject is dropped after that and they move onto a briefing of local fauna from there. Across the table Scott is dead quiet, and very interested in the grain-pattern of the table; Liam has to bite his tongue to keep from laughing, straight-out.

That night he goes back to the mess. But it’s empty and stays empty, through two (individually rationed) ramen packets and a quarter chapter of his now embarrassingly over-read copy of Blasto: Eternity is Forever.

“Liam,” says SAM. “If you are still experiencing difficulty falling asleep, there are multiple sleeping aids available in the medical bay.”

“Oh– no thanks, SAM. I’m good.”

“Perhaps I could attempt to improve your mood. Sara has often implied that humor is appropriate in attempting to lift one’s spirits.”

“That…depends on what your definition of humor is, I think.”

“I will proceed momentarily,” says SAM, sounding as pleased as an AI can manage to sound. “Scanning– transferring data files. Transfer complete: an asari, a turian, and a krogan walk into a bar.” 

“Does the punchline involve Omega strippers and batarian shard wine?”

“Possibly.”

—

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD]

SCOTTRYDER: hi everyone my name is scott

SCOTTRYDER: i like long walks on the beach at sunset and crisis response specialists ;)))

SCOTTRYDER: i also have an insatiable sweet tooth and fhdfdkjglkfjghksgohjlk’l;45

LIAMKOSTA: ???

CORAHARPER: oh my god

SCOTTRYDER: Fuck you, Sara!

SARARYDER: keep 👏 ur 👏 hands 👏 off 👏 my 👏 ice 👏 cream

…

The Hyperion isn’t called an Ark for nothing. It’s huge, on a new-age scale, and it’s frighteningly easy to keep to yourself, if you’re not careful.

That being said, Liam isn’t sure how he and Scott seem to keep managing to run into each other.

He wonders if this is just something else he’ll have to get used to: the mess hall door hissing open, his brain short-circuiting. Scott giving him that wonky not-smile and Liam thinking hey, thinking come here often? Fumbling for something smoother: what’s a guy like you doing on a ship like this?

Maybe he’d have better luck with something from Blasto. With false confidence: is that a thermal clip in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

“You should be getting some shut-eye,” says Scott, just honest, tired lines and three-day stubble.

“I was about to say the same thing,” says Liam, which is such a shit lie. “Are you back to check out the ice cream reserves? I’ve heard they’ve been dwindling.”

Scott flushes; Liam knew he would. “No,” he says. “Actually, I’m– SAM says you’re having trouble sleeping.”

Snitch. Liam glares half-heartedly at the comm, but the AI stays annoyingly silent, and Scott is waiting on an answer. “It’s nothing. I’m still just getting used to everything, that’s all.”

“He also says–” Scott looks troubled. “That you haven’t really…spent time with anyone else.”

Snitch! “SAM,” Liam says, exasperated. “Really?”

“I am required to report stress-induced complications of this kind.”

“Complications–! Scott, I’m fine.”

“Okay,” says Scott. But he doesn’t look convinced. “Well, I wanted to check in, just in case– I know you know this, but the worst thing you could do right now is–”

“Isolate myself. Yeah.” He does know; ergo, should know better. He’s seen it before, out in the field: division members who’d felt too deeply and seen too much, who stopped being seen at all. Separating from their squad. Becoming the ghosts of the victims they were too late to save.

“We could talk about it, if you want,” offers Scott. “Or– we could try something else? Stop me if you’ve heard this one before; an asari, a turian, and a krogan walk into a bar.”

Of course he’s heard it before. But he’s not about to stop him, it’s a classic. That’s sort of the problem with it, actually, you can never be sure which punchline was the original, which answer is meant to be the right one. There are so many damn ways it could go. An asari, a turian, and a krogan walk into a bar; the volus walks under it. An asari, a turian, and a krogan walk into a bar; only the krogan walks back out.

An asari, a turian, and a krogan walk into a bar.

The human shows up thirty-four years late and says, what’d I miss?

“You can’t give up,” Scott says, pulling a hand through his hair, “I don’t actually know the punchline.”

His ears have gone red, again, around the edges, eyes shifting: Liam’s started to commit that face to memory, every time he sees it. Locking it up somewhere safe, somewhere in the center of his chest, behind his bones. I won’t give up if you don’t, he could say. Or they could skip the bullshit and try again: A human walks into the mess hall at midnight, and Scott Ryder says ‘I should go’.

You know how many humans it takes to save the galaxy, Ryder? Twenty thousand and one: twenty thousand to leave before the fight’s even started, and Commander Shepard to stay behind and deal with whatever bullshit they’ve left behind.

“You’re worse than SAM,” says Liam. Instead of what he could, or should, or any of that. Instead of a heart-to-heart, a real one, for the sake of sanity and the rest.

“I know,” says Scott. “I really am.” He puts his hands in his pockets, tips his head toward the door. “C’mon. Let’s take a walk.”

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD] 

SARARYDER: hey liam

LIAMKOSTA: what’s up?

SARARYDER: hey scott

SCOTTRYDER: Yes?

SARARYDER: lol

LIAMKOSTA: do you need us for something or??

SARARYDER: nah just trying to settle a bet with cora

LIAMKOSTA: sara it’s two in the morning

SARARYDER: and yet…ur both up…

SARARYDER: suspicious…

…

The habitation deck is dark and deserted, with the Pathfinder crew all bunked away like good soldiers, the rest of humanity along for their cryo-ride. The only thing keeping Liam from tripping over his own feet is five years of field experience and the blue emergency lights, glowing softly along the hall edges.

“Everyone’s here for their own reasons,” Scott tells him. “My father calls it his responsibility. Sara says it’s her calling– turn here, it’s just around that corner.”

There’s the hiss of a door’s hydraulics; Scott steers him through, fingers steady at his elbow. Whatever room they’re in is even darker than the hallway. Scott is just a low voice, warm breath at his ear.

“Every time I went out past the Sol relay I could always map my way home. I could look up and know where I was. Even if we were right out at the edge of the traverse, I could look out and say, there, that’s Fortuna. And from there, the Annos Basin, and the relay to Arcturus, and I could work my way to the Citadel, just stargazing…SAM?”

“Yes, Ryder.”

“Open the observation deck shutters, please.”

Light filters in as the night-cycle shutters draw back from the viewport windows. He’s been on the observation deck before, but never like this, with the lights cast low and Andromeda’s stars painted from floor-to-ceiling. Definitely never with Scott Ryder’s hand splaying flat across his back.

“Maybe it was only in my head. But it was like a tether. Knowing I could map myself back home again, whenever I wanted.”

Focus on breathing. The rise and fall of your chest. Their arms brush when he shifts his weight, and Liam pretends he can feel the heat of him, the thermal clipped waves. I bet you bring all the girls here. “Earth’s a long way from here,” he says. “A long way, Ryder.”

“It’s still out there, though.”

Six-hundred years. Liam didn’t know it would be so heavy, all that leftover indecision mixing with doubt. Afraid to be left behind, of what he’s left behind. Afraid to be here, too, in the first real uncharted world of their lives.

“Scott,” he says, “can you tell me– why’d you join up?”

“With the Initiative?”

“Yeah, you know, new beginnings…?”

“Uh,” Scott looks embarrassed. “I don’t know, I just…Dad wanted Sara to go. And Sara, she did really want to go, it was all she used to talk about. And I’d spent so many years watching everyone else go off to fight, the adrenaline of it all, the glory…back then I thought I wanted that, too. So when Dad signed on, and Sara, too– I couldn’t stand the thought of–”

Pipe dreams, Liam thinks. Empty boxes and folded flags and being left behind, in a galaxy without a hero.

“I didn’t want to be alone,” Scott says, very softly.

He’s close enough that Liam can see the shadow of his lashes against his cheek, and hear him swallow. He’s close enough to kiss; he wonders whether Scott would let him. He thinks there might be a sliver of something in his face that says he should, but maybe it’s just the light of stars they don’t have names for, reflecting off of the surface of Habitat 7. Maybe it’s just Hyperion’s low-power glow reflecting in his eyes, relay-blue and soft the way Liam feels, on the edge of everything unknown, on the verge of something incredible.

Those eyes would reflect anything.

“Ryder,” says SAM, “Habitat 7 is within range of short-distance scans. The Pathfinder is requesting your presence.”

Whatever spell had been caught between them, it’s broken now. Scott blinks and sighs, and rolls one shoulder. “Fathers,” he says, shaking his head as though it’s an old joke of theirs, but Liam knows better; Scott only has one joke in his arsenal and he still doesn’t know its punchline. “I should go,” he says, like a damn hero. “I’ll see you on board the shuttle.”

Despite the unknowns: Scott is going to carry him to hell and back; somehow, he’s sure of it.

Damn the unknowns:

Liam is going to let him.

“You know,” Scott says as the door hisses open, swiveling back around with his hands in his pockets, shy almost-smile and shoulders squared, “I think he’d really be proud of us– Shepard would, I mean, don’t you think?”

Liam’s heart thuds once, twice, out-of-rhythm. Skips a beat and then goes on beating, high in his chest, filling the hollow of his throat.

“Yeah,” says Liam. “I reckon he would be.”

…

[TEAM MESSAGE BOARD]

SCOTTRYDER: All right, team, we’ve got the green light. Who’s ready to set up some outposts?

SARARYDER: i’m ready!!

CORAHARPER: beyond ready

LIAMKOSTA: born ready

SCOTTRYDER: Let’s move out!

SCOTTRYDER: Liam, I don’t know what we’ll find down there, but I just wanted to tell you…there’s a lot I didn’t get to say, last night. But it’s been a real honor, getting to know you. And I promise you: I’ve got your back.

CORAHARPER: oh scott

LIAMKOSTA: why are you like this

CORAHARPER: poor scott

LIAMKOSTA: someone seriously needs to show him how to work this thing

CORAHARPER: scott come back

CORAHARPER: you can’t pour your heart out on the team forum and then leave

SARARYDER: THAT’S TWENTY CREDITS YOU OWE ME HARPER

SARARYDER: PAY UP

…

In the end, Liam thinks, as the shuttle engines flare to life, as the shuttle bay doors yawn open, as the Hyperion shrinks behind them–

Maybe they don’t need a punchline at all.

20,000 humans cross into Andromeda galaxy.

20,000 humans sleep for six-hundred and thirty-four years.

One human stares off into space and says: I didn’t want to be alone.

And the other says: I know.

The other says: you aren’t.

[jamfingers]

Now that I read it, ngl I like "Life And Death" way better than "Twilight". Spoilers ahead.

CONS:

I have one really big issue and that’s that the execution for disproving that Twilight wasn’t sexist fell so flat. Bella experienced sexist treatment at the hands of Edward (her boyfriend), Charlie (her father), and Jacob (her best friend). While I can see what SM was getting at about Edward and Bella’s relationship specifically being uneven not because of gender, but because of power dynamics, Bella experienced sexism from her other important male relationships. Charlie and Edward had the whole “Take care of my girl” exchange in front of Bella like she wasn’t even there when he came to pick her up for baseball and it irritated her. Beau had his dad being awestruck that his son scored someone so hot in the equivalent scene and Beau was like “ikr?”. In NM (granted L&D didn’t get this far and went a different plot route in the end), Jacob sexually assaults Bella and because she can’t physically stop him, she just has to wait it out. Beau, like Bella, gets a harem to choose from, but unlike Bella, has (imo) more control at rearranging these dynamics.

There were also the societal adjustments made to suit Beau’s gender…like the assault in Port Angeles….what? Boys can’t be victims of random almost gang rapes? Or Beau’s fave book. The neuroscientist in me is like “well, there is a 2% genetic difference in males and females that accounts for mechanistic changes in brain functioning” while the sociologist in me is like “bullshit, his preference change is because of gender conformity and expectations”. So I’m torn.

Also the entire book is basically a fan fiction and a ploy for the author to make some more money (Yes I got suckered in, but still bro….you didn’t change much. I’d rather have something rewritten than revised).

Also, as much as I like the queer Twilight ideas, Bella would be just as “abused” in her relationship with Edythe and Beau would be “abused” in his relationship with Edward (I quote this because abused is the word used by fandom critics - I, like SM, always saw it as a power dynamic issue, not abuse, but that’s another thing all together) because both narrators just seem so damn susceptible to brainwashing and both versions of their love interest are incredibly forcible in their assertions and wills. The dynamics of their relationship don’t actually change much in the narrative, which was SM’s point - many people only called it abusive bc Edward was a male and Bella was a female, when in actuality it should be considered that way no matter what the gender or sexuality dynamics. Just saying. Stay consistent because, for all her faults, SM did. Edward/Edythe almost always got their way while Bella/Beau was often frustrated because they had to be the compliant one. When B does exert their will, it has to be through trickery rather than talking it out like adults bc they know E will be an obstacle. That is not an equivalent relationship and no amount of gender/sexuality changes will change that.

PROS:

So many things I loved. I adored Bella and Beau is just as lovable. He is so tol and so awkward and so adoring of this girl and it was refreshing to read a YA romance (esp a supernatural/fantasy one) about an ordinary boy falling in love with an extraordinary girl. I also like the fact that he’s more straight-forward in his descriptions of things that aren’t Edythe than Bella is. Bella goes on and on about how green and wet and cold it is and how she hates Forks bc it’s not Phoenix. That never appealed to me. Beau’s straight-forwardness and briefness about these details, to me, emphasizes the suddenly flowery, dramatic language he adopts when basking in Edythe’s glory. It was cute.

The genderbent versions of the characters seemed so much more…well-rounded and developed compared to their original incarnations. Which is weird because the book is essentially a copy-n-paste except for a few key moments and changes. Perhaps the author was just more comfortable writing them this time around.

Edythe Cullen is so much cooler than Edward. I didn’t like Edward much but I understand Beau’s obsession more than Bella’s. Fr dude I get it. Like the ECs essentially have the same rotten personality but it’s the little details that draw you in. Edythe’s details make her more awesome than Edward, sorry not sorry. She’s also like, smol and graceful and possibly more sarcastic than any version of all the characters which contrasts Beau’s slightly overwhelmed baby giraffe status so adorably. She reminds me of those evil-but-elegant looking Maine Coon cats.

A bevy of awesome female characters. Because so many of the key supernaturals were male in Twilight, it is fucking amazing that this whole new world seems so female driven. The new Volturi? Yes. The matriarch wolf pack? Double yes.

Archie fucking Cullen. I didn’t think it was possible for me to love a Twilight character more than Alice and Rosalie, but Archie man. Omg. (Royal not so much -his name omg I’m dead - because he seems to have Rosalie’s chip but his reasons for it are so ugh compared to hers. Both lost their families and statuses, yes, but Rosalie enduring horrific sexual assault before dying and losing all this on top of that seems more striking than Royal getting jumped. Idk, both are PTSD-inducing moments, but it once again portrays that SM failed to full stop the sexism she’s accused of utilizing. Also Royal was so vague about the details so SM wouldn’t have to think about developing why Royal is such a prick - like he could just be an asshole who thinks Beau is an idiot. That’s fine. I thought Bella was an idiot and sided with Rosalie, bc yeah girl, you want to die for a boy, a terrible, terrible boy at that. Rosalie was right in her logic and gets unfairly shat on for being a bitch. Whatever. I digress.) But Archie is also a double yes. I loved Archie, I want one in my life.

The ending. That was the ending I wanted for Twilight when I first read the saga. Tbh, the way Breaking Dawn ended was too perfect, kinda creepy on many accounts, retconish (Renesme or however the fuck it’s spelled shouldn’t exist, fight me), and frankly, incredibly boring. Too many things worked out for Bella and Edward and while they did have obstacles, their relationship was too happily ever after for my tastes and not really earned because a lot of their obstacles arose from their own stupidity/stubbornness.

The follow up for this new ending could potentially be soooo good and complex because there would be so many new obstacles and stakes to explore with Beau as a (spoiler) vampire in a relationship with a girl he’s madly in love with, but slowly realising exactly what it is he ended up losing to be with her. That is good relationship strife. Plus seeing Beau have a nemesis in Victor (Victoria) would make up for us being deprived of Bella having a single enemy that she went toe-to-toe with rather than her being the target of Edward’s nemesis because that would hurt Edward. Bella was very much side-lined in her own story and didn’t get to grow much in Edward’s presence (she had development just fine when he wasn’t around) until she got pregnant. Beau, with his ending, would not have that. I also want to see more fiercely protective Edythe - I want to see a couple protect each other, not one more powerful partner seclude the other away from the world “for their own good”. The new ending is a good way to provide growth for Edythe’s character as well and completely overturn that “abusive” dynamic. While I’m sad Bella didn’t get Beau’s awesome ending, the author seems satisfied and so were a lot of less critical readers so… *shrugs* Whatever.

Anyway td;lr - Life and Death, while not perfect, is a better story than Twilight with the foundation for a really interesting follow up if the time and thought were put into it.

[sydneyjamesworld-blog]

Notes 2

INTRO TO DOC

Introduction:

-I never thought about how blurred the lines were when it came to documentary because we have things like reality tv which is often scripted but still set up closer to a documentary as opposed to a narrative film. Also there is a natural fascination with not only people who belong to the same world as we do but the tug of war between what’s real and what’s fabricated.

-”how is it that we are willing to trust in the representations made by moving images”- I think a lot of people now a days do not trust what they see even when the video looks so obvious. This is another reason as to why reenactments and the like in docs are so tricky because some audiences might believe the film is discredited at that point.

-How do you achieve maintaining the “impression of authenticity” while trying to go the experimental route for a topic that’s less personal and more factual?

Chapter 1:

-Documentary is always changing.

-the idea of playing or presenting ourselves as characters is very interesting and adds a whole new level to what a documentary is and is it truly non-fiction if some of the subjects are aware of the camera (i.e. interviews)

-  Nanook definitely does mirror the white European family model. I saw another movie the fast runner (this is the English name) and Inuits said this film was pretty accurate and in it the main character had more than one wife.

-Different modes of documentary is cool because I was thinking of doing standard doc with interviews and maybe observational footage. I like the idea of poetic mode.

-If documentaries have movements/periods, what would we call the period of documentary we’re in now? Modern? Contemporary?

DOC VOICE & VISION

Chapter 1: 

-After going to a few of my documentary classes I’m not quite sure if I know what a documentary really is by definition/ not sure if this chapter cleared it up any.

-finding my artistic approach is something I’m very concerned about and the chapter says is a big obstacle but will happen, which sounds like I'll have to get through making a lot of shitty documentaries first.

-Research you can do alone (checking online databases and books) and then with other people (field work, build connections and trust!)

-It’s ok if your hypothesis changes over time! As you learn new information it changes the makeup of the doc and can make it even more interesting

-casting for your documentary was something I never thought about but  ( I assumed anyone would be good to interview if they related to your topic/hypothesis or had helpful info) but choosing people who are better in front of a camera can be a good move. Simultaneously don’t be afraid to cast people who aren’t the best public speakers because they may still have something to offer.

-If casting multiple people try to make them distinguishable so audience doesn’t get confused

-Be realistic. If you only have so much time and money pick a topic that is feasible and accessible (close to home).

-Film reliable people, if they pull out or don’t want to be featured in the doc anymore you’re screwed.

- How do you get a wide audience interested in your specific documentary? For example if a doc is on accessible contraceptives, the people who should understand that BC should be easier to get and that certain groups are at a disadvantage are the ones who should be watching the doc, not necessarily people who already know this.

Chapter 2:

-S/o to Thomas Edison from NJ for mise-en-scène

-Joris Ivens leading the impressionistic doc scene, this is intertwined with poetic documentary

-Reflexive films seem the most potentially feasible. Rea’s History and Memory: For Akiko and Takashige was nice to watch and see how she made a whole piece crafted around what she didn’t know about her family’s past and memories she had of her own. Also this gave me an understanding of what experimental doc is.

-Tv documentary makes me think of documentary series which are popular now as well as the question of where does reality tv fall? Maybe the difference is reality tv doesn’t have a position on any world issue or isn’t trying to say anything in particular.

- Observational filmmaking: is it always ethical? If the people know you are there filming with their permission sure if you don’t consent is that an over step?

-Not sure if it makes sense to intervene in an observational film if you are literally trying to be a fly on the wall.

-Tongues Untied makes me think maybe I should try to make my doc for this class more personal? But at the same time I want to focus on accessible contraceptives for women in low-income areas which I wouldn’t qualify for. Also worried if the doc was very impersonal it would come across as a sex informational video which I don’t want either.

-Ever since I found out documentaries do reenactment’s I'm seeing it everywhere! I’m watching the Ted Bunny Netflix docu-series like this  is not real footage of his childhood...so in some cases it works but I appreciate when it’s not used.

-Final take: Lots of different styles of documentary! No idea what style mine will be in ahhhh!!