#batfamily head cannons

[bibibusinessman]

[bookburners]

Have we ever considered that Damian “raised by assassins” Wayne and Tim “professional only child” Drake never hated each other as much as they have both alway thought of each other as brothers but have no experience with Cain instinct and just assumed it was blind, unadulterated, rage?

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Batman: Crime is abnormaly quiet today, one more round and we should go home, chum.

Robin (Jason): A-Okay. I may even have time to read a bit before going to bed.

Batman: I'll think about it.

Robin: We could go to Bat Burguer! Di-Nightwing said they have an amazing chocolate milkshake.

Batman: I don't know, Robin...

Robin: I'm sure they have banana milkshake as well or something fruity.

Batman: Hm

Robin: I knew it!

Batman: Hm??

Robin: You are a fruit bat.

Batman: what?

Robin: I was reading a book about animals and they say that of the 1200 known species of bats only three are vampire bats. You are too normal to be a vampire bat. Also vampire bats are smaller and you are very big and vampire bats move solo and while you like to prented to be moody and lonley you have me, Agent A, Batgirl and Nightwing and that just in Gotham. So you are a fruit bat. And you love fruity things.

Batman: *smilling* I suppose.

Robin: And that means we are going to drink the milkshakes because you can't refuse fruit things!

Batman: Because I'm a fruit bat.

Robin: Yeah!!

----- [somewhere in the future] ----

Robin (Damain): I'm the son of Batman, I'll drink your blood, Hood.

Red Hood: Nah, B's totally a fruit bat and as the "blood son" that just means you like banana milkshake, sorry demon brat.

Batman: *in the background, accidentaly listens* *happy hm*

[ahfrickenfrick]

tim: *gets pissed off and starts posting pictures he has of his families mess ups in costumes to r/gothamfails on reddit*

a lot of them are different bats face planting into buildings while using the grapple, and a lone few shots of Batman missing a landing and stumbling into Red Hood

[jasmines-library]

Batfamily headcanons with batsis that used to be a Black Widow please?

Note: Thank you for requesting, I hope this is okay as I don't tend to write headcanons a lot, but I had fun with this and I thought that the idea was so cool!

The first time they met you, you had taken them by surprise, which was unusual for them as being vigilantes meant that they were always on high alert.

⛤ They were on patrol and you had snuck past them, taking out the criminals before they even had time to blink and then pinning them down from behind.

⛤ Although they were skeptical at first, it hadn't taken long for the four boys to develop a liking for you, especially Damian who was in complete awe of the way fought and slunk around the streets, although you would be lying if you said that he wasn't the teeniest bit jealous.

⛤ They saw you a few times after that. Your training made you hard to track down, but they were skilled to and with some digging, Tim had managed to find you.

⛤ You all became thick as thieves after that, often going out on patrol with each other.

⛤ And soon Bruce invited you to stay.

⛤ At first, you were hesitant. Your time in the Red Room had lead you to develop some trust issues but you took a leap and boy were you glad you did.

⛤ There is always something to do with the vigilantes; training, reading, watching movies. and you quickly became a part of their weekly routines.

⛤They love having you around too, often asking you to help them with their stealth and training.

⛤ You had to work around the assassinations with Bruce because they broke his 'no killing rule.', but after discussing with him and Jason, the three of you came to a suitable compromise and you become a huge part of protecting Gotham and of their lives.

⛤ You would do anything to protect them as they would for you.

[stars-fall]

Damian Wayne-Al Ghul chronic pain head canons

the pain is caused by the steel spine implant if you're wondering

-refuses to tell the family lest they learn that he is infact not perfection in the form of a 14 year old boy

-will spend an absorbent amount of time to find a posture that will cause him the least pain (God forbid he lay down)

-hogs the family heating pad

-his morning stretches help with soreness on good days

-back in the league Talia would sit and rub his back at night when it got too bad

-Alfred knows and often leaves those icy-hot Patches and painkillers on Damian's desk

-During one of his worst flair ups Bruce came in to check on him and found him crying. Bruce sat with him, running his fingers through Damian's hair while murmuring stories about when he and talia were younger until Dami fell asleep

-that was the first time Dames called Bruce baba

-it took him years of being in the manor to unlearn his habits of pushing through debilitating pain

-half the reason he started drawing was because it was something 'productive' to do that didn't agitate his back

-sleeps like a corpse (flat on his back) because that's the best way to reduce back pain

--------------------------

A list of what I hc dami has

Chronic:

- back pain

-head aches- specifically in the back of his head /neck area

-hip aches

Basically anything that is related to his spine hurts ok?

[pidgeeepombo]

Jason Todd x theatre!!reader.

For the theatre kids! jason todd stans. (Like me LMAO)

Jason would ALWAYS find a way to see the show, and if he couldn't go in person he would MAKE A POINT of watching the entire recorded performance (regardless of your role) just because he knows it's important to you.

He is your biggest fan

At the end of the entire presentation he gives flowers

If you do musical theater, even though he doesn't really like musicals at first, after meeting you he starts to like it just because of you (he studies the entire play just to help you)

You compare him with Sweeney todd. Because of the white lock and last name, and both of them was legally dead/everyone thinks they're dead and have killed some people. <333

He takes you on his motorbike to eat burgers even if you're wearing some embarrassing outfit. and he doesn't let anyone look at you the wrong way.

You teach him focus and improvisation games so you can have fun

[massivetittiesandwarcrimes]

Pokemon headcanon (not full teams, just one for now):

Damian: Bisharp "The Sword Blade Pokemon" Dark/Steel type

A warrior sword Pokemon? Practically made for him.

Tim: Oranguru "The Sage Pokemon" Normal/Psychic

Now hear me out - part normal type because Tim wasn't chosen or born for the role, he chose it for himself. The dex entry mentions it uses human tools. And it's possible abilities are Inner Focus (prevents flinching), telepathy (anticipate opponents moves), and symbiosis (pass it's held item to an ally).

Dick: Blacephalon (yeah, technically an Ultra Beast, but whatever) "The Fireworks Pokemon".

I fully admit it's because it's basically a clown pokemon and Dick is from the circus. The other option is Copperajah, because of Zitka.

Jason: Alolan Marowak "The Bone Keeper Pokemon" Fire/Ghost type.

It evolves from Cubone, who's sad because it's parents are dead. And then the typing fits - fire because he got blown up, and ghost because he was dead.

Bruce: Absol "The Disaster Pokemon" pure Dark type.

Everyone thinks Absol is evil and brings disaster, but it actually tries to warn people of danger. A 'Dark Protector' type of creature 😘

Cass: Meloetta Pirouette Forme "The Melody Pokemon" Normal/Fighting type.

It's a fighting type that also dances, and Cass likes ballet 🩰. Plus, it's base form it's normal/psychic, which ties into her ability to read people's body language

Duke: Miraidon "The Paradox Pokemon" Electric/Dragon type

Duke is awesome, so obviously he gets the only legendary 🥰. It's electric, which is the closest to a 'light' type and he had light powers, and dragon type because that seems a good fit for the only meta hero in Gotham.

[adhahyperfocusingonsomething]

Random Gotham Civilian: “So what is your opinion on the vigilante Red Hood?”

Jason (Who is definitely not said vigilante) Todd: “Oh I think he is smoking! Totally hot, have you seen his pecks? Have you seen the guys thighs? If I met the guy in person I would totally ask for his work out.”

Random Gotham Civilian: “I… I would actually have to agree with you on that. Your right-”

Jason (ego boosted) Todd: “Of course I am-”

Inspired by this bot generation:

Also inspired by @adhdhyperfixatedoneverything

[slut4-haydenchristensen]

i’ll be like yeah i can be normal about my hyperfixations and then i remember that i have the entire opening monologue to the batman memorized and, for a moment, i consider the possibility of me being incapable of being normal about my hyperfixations

[bibibusinessman]

[typhoonquixol]

This is a nice little bonding moment. I like how some parts are in character with Jason dumping his trauma and then there's just 'I will buy us bracelets'. It almost feels like he was cursed to say every thought in his head (very fun)

How Jason and Roy became friends at a Burger King

Jason Todd: You seem familiar, have I threatened you in the past? Roy Harper: Did you sell me China cat when I was addicted to heroin? Jason Todd sits down at the table. Jason: I'm sorry, I need to know more because we might be friends now. Oh shoot I think I do know you. Roy: Are you selling me drugs? Jason: Nope. Hey... did you shoot arrows and dress like peter pan? Roy: It... it was more robin hood inspired. Jason: Red hair... arrows... robin hood... Oh you're that moron's, Arrow, sidekick! Oh my God, it's so good to see you again! How you been? Roy: On... heroin, falling out with Arrow, got married, had a daughter, lost custody, was on heroin and recovering. Jason: Awesome, you are comfortable to tell me all of this. I like that. Roy: I ain't got nothing left to lose. How do you know who I am? Jason: I'll go with my trauma, okay, I was the second robin, died by the joker, was revived from the lazarus pit, went insane, worked with the ghuls for a few years, found Batman, tried to kill him, failed, crazy times man. Jason laughs and then sighs. Roy stares at him confused. Jason: I am not making up a single thing I said... My name is Jason Todd, you met me before when I was a kid, oh and I fought my brother Nightwing and this annoying spoiled brat named Tim. Roy: Oh my God, you're not lying. I was there when you made fun of his dead mom. Jason: That's me! Roy Harper: You're Jason Todd... Didn't you die? Jason Todd: Yes, for 5 years actually, but then I wasn't... then I went insane... I'm kind of insane at the moment and I murder horrible people for money... And vengeance, but the money helps. Jason pours salt in his glass of water and chugs it. Roy looks around confused. Roy (worried): Are you selling me drugs? Is this a test? Where's Green Arrow? I promised I wouldn't do them again. Jason (concerned): No. I'm not selling drugs... I have cigarettes but I don't want that for a former drug addict. I just want to be friends with you... I want to... help you. I never got to do that with other drug addicts, and you look cool. I remember you were... the only guy nice to me. Roy: I don't... I mean it was common human decency. When you died I was sad, on china cat, but sad. Jason: Can we hang out then? Can I be your friend? Please. Roy: Um, sure... I'm kind of friends with Nightwing at times. Jason: Not anymore, you're my friend! We are friends! Nobody will take that from us! I will buy us bracelets. I heard a lot about you after I died and you are the perfect guy friend I could EVER have. Roy (sincere): That was the nicest thing anyone has said to me. Jason: I mean it too! I have not had friends in a while. Roy: I can tell, but we're in a burger king so... this isn't the oddest thing that has happened in here. Jason: This is great. What do you want to do? Go to a movie, a mission, a mission and a movie? Roy: Okay, um, a mission if I can get paid. Jason: Bitchin' let's go! Jason stands up and yanks Roy out of his chair and they run out of the burger king.

[incorrectbatfam]

Heyy can you tell me you're head cannon for each different batfamily member sexuality? You've probably posted it before but I'm tired and confusing myself so I'll barrell on. Anyway, yeah I've kinda forgotten what I wanted but I've probably written it at the top... sorry if not 😭

Dick: redheads

Jason: redheads just to annoy Dick

Tim: morons (gender neutral)

Damian: kids his age only care about one thing—world domination

Duke: people who could secretly kick his ass

Cullen: C-list criminal accomplices

Stephanie: people with dark hair

Cassandra: himbos, herbos, and thembos alike

Barbara: the guy next door (gender neutral)

Harper: canonically bi but would specifically go for the Pride Knights

Carrie: whoever can handle her daily screaming into a bucket

Kate: lesbiab. lesbiam. less bien. girls

Helena: sapphic in a Catholic girl way

Luke: achillean in a gym bro way

Bette: hot take: asexual

Alfred: undefined. unlabeled. ethereal

Selina: bi but would ditch you on the side of the road if you talk shit about her cats

Bruce: bi but would ditch you on the side of the road if you talk shit about his kids

[qcomicsy]

a list of funniest things jason todd could do:

slowly steal the parts of the batmobile and reassemble it elsewhere, then pull up next to bruce in his own second secret batmobile

become a lawyer and get joker setenced to the death penalty - bonus is that he completes college and gets a degree which bruce never did and alfred is proud beyond the gravethat one of his grandkids actually completed college

change bruces name to "free trires" in his phone contacts

call time the wrong name everyday, but it starts of sounding like a genuine mistake (tom, jim ect) and slowly gets further and further away from the original (jimothy, jeremy, dave, the dogs name)

dye his hair red, claim he was an original red head and then gaslight the family into believing bruce made him dye his hair black to look more like dick and be a replacement

come out as gay and claim to be the only gay member of the batfamily and when tim tries to say something to dispute it he just hits him with "who are you again? the computer guy or smthing?"

could also come out as poly and roll up to family dinners with more than one partner and if someone says something about it, he just says "mad cuz i got TWO more partners than you huh. lonesome bitch."

feel free to add on

LMAAAAOO THIS IS GREAT

Let's go.

Made a carbon copy of Batman and spread in strategic places on the Batcave, Tim's boat, Clock Tower, Duke's nest and Dick's house. (He almost killed them)

(One of Dick's colleagues saw it and he had to lie he was this die hard Batfanboy, his ego never recovered until today.)

Stole Tim's mug and placed on Damian's room, stole Damian's mug and placed on Tim's boat then proceeded to visit the Manor until he hard the scream of the fight he planted between them;

When he saw Bernard for the first time he said "Whoa Timmy you move on fast, this one is Terry right?";

Did a Tramp Stamp tattoo;

Slut shames Dick every chance he gets (this one is actually cannon);

Shot Dick's phone;

Every Christmas shows up with a different Outlaws member and affirms that's his partner

Dated an arrow to piss of his dad, when Bruce got over it proceeded to date a lantern instead;

Never told no one other than Dick he's actually in a stable relationship with Artemis because he refuses to swap Bruce's horrified reaction to a normal one;

Gave Bernard the shovel talk;

When he bumped with Selina after the (failed) marriage and she teased him on how he didn't gave her shit for it he just answered "No, no I get it"

Purposely brings Harley to bat reunions under the bullshit "She's my therapist" when the bats bother him, knowing his therapy with Harley only count when they're at her office;

Told every one he's Harley's adopted kid (actually Harley was the one to say that once when she was drunk and he just went along with it);

Exchanged Bernard's number to Kon's in Tim's cell phone and vice-versa;

Left his Mustache grow and showed up as Matches Malone in one of Wayne's Gala;

Lied he was actually a Titan but they kicked him out because Dick's is an asshole;

Stoled Signal's Patrol Lunch;

Stole's Spoiler's lunch;

Brought alcohol to manage going through their family gathering when he was caught he blamed on Tim;

(He thought about blaming on Dick but he knew Dick would just go along with it)

Everytime Dick, Barbara and Bruce call him he answers with "He's dead";

Introduced Tim to the Outlaws with "That's Robin they found him on the thrash"

Showed up to Barbara's job dropped a "Hi mom" as a greeting then proceeded to laugh his ass off while Barbara tried o explain to her coworkers that that tank of a man wasn't her child;

Told Dick Talia adopted him;

Told Talia Dick adopted him;

Told Damian that if Batman dies he's going to adopt him out of spite;

[lazycats-stuff]

Batfamily x male reader who likes to cuddle

Alright. *cracks knuckles*, Lets do this. Some nice fluff. Also, it took me far too long to find a nice GIF. Also, should I do like head cannons? Is that what they are called? And also, this is a bit shorter than normal.

Summary: (Y/N) loves cuddles.

Warnings: nothing, pure and utter fluff.

Bruce wouldn't consider himself to be an affectionate dad. Does he hug them and provide them with advice and words of encouragement? Yes. He isn't a cruel father. His children are his priority, despite the way he might look cold in general. But he truly loves all of his children. None of his children were particularly affectionate, besides Dick.

That was until (Y/N) came into the picture. He was the youngest, a year younger than Damian. Bruce saved him from the streets and he wasn't always so cuddly. He was more cold and standoffish, the streets leaving a mark. Not trusting, not anything. Simply living there.

But as time went on, Bruce has noticed that (Y/N) became showing more physical affection. It became with leaning on his siblings if tired and with Bruce it would be reaching for his hand when in public, since he would get overwhelmed by the attention of the paparazzi. Bruce never minded, understanding how (Y/N) is still a child, not used to this. He would be scared of it, which is normal for a child. And Bruce had no issues protecting him.

Soon enough, when (Y/N) had nightmares from living on the streets, he would go to Bruce. And Bruce always lifted the blanket for him, tucking him in with it, making sure he was warm physically and emotionally. Bruce wanted (Y/N) to know that he had someone in his corner, he had a protector.

Soon enough, (Y/N) became the cuddle bug of the family. Bruce never minded it. How could he? He enjoyed it, but he would never really say it outright. He has a certain reputation to uphold. But (Y/N) cracks that reputation and Bruce allows it.

Dick enjoyed (Y/N)'s cuddling. More often than not, the two could be found together, lounging on the couch, Dick's arm around his shoulders, watching TV or just napping. Depending on the day. Sometimes, (Y/N) wouldn't be in the living room since he needed to study, since he started school officially. And if Bruce wasn't available for comfort during nightmares, Dick was.

Jason... Jason was around the middle when it came to physical affection. He didn't mind it occasionally, but he had his limits. (Y/N) tried to respect those boundaries, but sometimes he just couldn't, seeking comfort in his big brother after something. And considering that Jason grew up on the streets, who better to understand his problems than Jason?

And Jason helped his brother, even with physical affection and cuddles during the night when (Y/N) couldn't fall asleep. Whenever he had a night off of patrol and (Y/N) couldn't sleep, they would be lying down in Jason's room, either talking or just lying down together, Jason holding his brother in his arms.

And while he hated to admit it, he was starting to like it. To share and trade experiences from living on the streets... And cuddling wasn't so bad. It was nice. But would he ever admit it out loud? Nope. He would like to remain his reputation, just like Bruce. But is he ever found in public with (Y/N), arm around his shoulder? Yes.

Tim... He never minded any affection to be frank. If he was on his laptop working, (Y/N) would have his head in Tim's lap, just enjoying his time with his workaholic brother. And Tim liked the weight on his lap. It was comforting. Tim is often heard saying that (Y/N) is a great addition to the family.

Damian... He's not a fan of affection. Never have been. Being raised by the League of Assassins, under his grandfather and mother. Affection was never on the table for him and never will be. But... Being an older brother... It awoke something in Damian. He didn't know what, but he was feeling protective.

Of course, he would rather die than show it outwardly. He was cold and he would have liked to keep it that way. But then (Y/N) came into their lives. At first, Damian was kind of steering clear of him, trying to assess him. Damian is a distrustful individual and he doesn't let just anyone in.

But (Y/N) was a persistent bastard, as Damian would often say. It took some time, but soon Damian didn't mind the cuddling. If they were watching a movie and (Y/N) wanted a cuddle? He would allow it. Would he be grumbling about it? Yes. Did he mean any of that grumbling? No. He may say yes, but everyone can see that he adored his little brother. But Damian would deny it. Until the day he died.

It was a night where everyone took a night off and Bruce wanted to spend time with his sons. So he called in a family night. A movie night in specific. Alfred was invited too. There were blankets, pillows and a lot of space in the home movie theater so they could all lie down comfortably. There were snacks and everyone was just happy to take a night off.

(Y/N) came in last, assessing where to lie down. Where is the best position for snuggles and cuddles. Bruce is a most certain option since (Y/N) started calling him dad and it warmed Bruce's heart. (Y/N) moved next to Bruce and Jason, moving to be in between them. The two chuckled and Bruce pulled a blanket over (Y/N), making sure to keep him warm.

Jason put an arm over his shoulders, allowing him to lean onto him.

" So, what are we watching? " (Y/N) asked, curious about what they choose while he was gone.

" We've managed to agree on Netflix. Not a movie yet so you made it in time for the vote, " Jason explained as he watched Dick and Tim arguing over the genre of the movies. (Y/N) smiled as he leaned on Jason, who adjusted his hold on his brother.

" What's the smile for? " Bruce asked in a quiet murmur.

" I'm just happy to have a family. To be loved. Despite the chaos that surrounds this family. "

Bruce smiled at that and brought (Y/N) closer to him. Jason didn't mind it, he allowed it. Damian watched everyone with a critical eye, trying not to smile. He has heard (Y/N)'s words and he was happy to hear them. He handed (Y/N) some popcorn and (Y/N) took them happily.

Alfred finally sat down on the couch after preparing the rest of the snacks. " Still undecided? "

(Y/N) sighed quietly, a smile still on his face. This family may be chaotic, but he wouldn't have it any other way.