#basically what I’m trying to say here
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Literally only 4 minutes into the triplets car video tonight: SOMEONE TELL ME WHY MATTS THIS ADORABLE! “You’re my best freind Chris” “you’re my princess Chris” UGH IM ACTUALLY IN LOVE WITH THIS MAN. They way that he just seems so happy lately is making me feel so emotional like YES MATT YOU DESERVE THIS HAPPINESS SO MUCH. I just wanna give him a hug so fucking much. Maybe them going to Boston again just really brought out that side of them.
#basically what I’m trying to say here#is that I love Matt Sturniolo so much#and I’m so proud of him#and I literally wish#for him to be this happy#all the fucking time#cause it’s so adorable#Sturniolo triplets#matthew bernard sturniolo#maisie rambles :)
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Gourmand: Any minute now.
Hunter: …I-
Arti: I’m sorry!
Hunter: Huh?
Arti: I-I’m so sorry. For attacking you, and for- for everything.
Arti: I’ve been such an asshole to you.
Hunter: …Yeah you have been an asshole. But I fucked up too, I didn’t know what I was saying. I thought…
Hunter: …it doesn’t matter what I thought. I shouldn’t have said that. I, uh… I-I heard about your k-
Arti: Don’t. It’s in the past now.
Gourmand: Is it?
Gourmand: You attacked him over saying something that triggered you, so no, it doesn’t seem to be all in the past.
Gourmand: It isn’t fair to hurt someone for not knowing something that you never told them.
PART ONE IS DONE!!!!!!!!! Part two will probably come in about, uh, seven years, give or take. /j
(It isn’t perfect, but it’s been too long and I needed to get the first part of this comic out. I’m honestly super happy I finished, because it was unnecessarily hard lmao. Anyways I’m gonna ramble in the tags now)
#Rw siblings au#Rw Artificer#Rw Hunter#Rw Gourmand#okay okay so#The last frame is basically Hunter realizing that Arti doesn’t actually know anything about what happened to him either lol#Also we finally get the reveal of what that one drawing of Hunter being confused was about!#He did not expect to ever hear Arti say she was sorry#Like for anything#The Arti he knows doesn’t do that lol#But! She’s changing! For the better! :D#Gourmand is out here desperately trying to parent these two idiots#He literally put them in a time-out to think about what they’ve done lmfao#Neither of them have ever been hit with the “I’m not mad I’m just disappointed” before lol#But it’s finally happening! They are having a conversation!!! Yippee!!!#The time it took for me to draw this comic is canonically how long they were sitting there for before either of them said anything /j
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Was thinking about how much of a normo I come across as irl, how I’ve felt a lil odd person out at their shows bc of being a bit older (29) and looking so aggressively normal, how generally confused people in my life would be if they knew about my d&p obsession, how thoroughly i mask weirder traits and essentially codeswitch to suit the mainstream, etc.
i feel kind of fish out of water when I imagine how all the people that populate my tumblr phandom ecosystem are likely presenting to the world irl (I.e. more visibly queer, counterculture, and so on). But then I think maybe the most visible phannies are the ones with the most curated, alt, deliberate daytoday lewks/style? So maybe what I’m picturing is off base? But then I’m also basing this off of what audiences look like in audience footage, m&gs, etc.
Sooooooo i would like to know… do you guys feel like you present as someone who may be Deeply Online and obsessed with two gay nerds from the internet? Or do you hide it and fly under the radar, masking as a total normy and living a double life?
(To clarify I don’t mean you’re like out and about wearing the fringes boob sweatshirt lol I more mean vibes and overall lewk yk?)
#does this make any sense?#not to say we’re all abnormal freaks over here but also…. we lowkey are freaks lol#like this is not typical behavior#obvs when I say dressing alt and counterculture I’m aware phannies aren’t like a predominantly goth community or some extreme aesthetic#or what have you#I just mean that this is obviously not a super mainstream interest nor are they mainstream creators anymore#(arguably they never were. they were big but not mainstream. I think people entrenched in internet#and YouTube and phandom can become a bit tunnelvisioned and#and forget that even at their peak Dan and Phil were still#a niche interest and an unconventional one#but i digress)#basically I’m trying to figure out how many of us are also living double lives on here#I hope no one comes for my over this or it doesn’t get misconstrued#I just have like SUCH a normal job and so many people I know would be DEEPLY confused if they learned about this whole thing#and obviously there isn’t a clear binary of like normal vs. internet dwelling weirdo#and that we contain multitudes#and all things can be true simultaneously#I know I know I know you know that I know right?? but you also know what I mean right??#me yapping#dan and phil#phan
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Thinking abt Kae’s Fatui verse,,,,
#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//Him having a sort of fatal attraction vibe goin with Traveler like Came||ya’s whole thing almost hdbfb#//The whole ‘you’re interesting; I really like you; I can’t WAIT to see what makes you tick’#//Except he might actually be more of a danger to them; considering his endgame for those he ‘loves’#v; l’innamorato (fatui!kaeya)#//The love idea of him v attached to Signora; deffo got along with the kiddos of the HotH better fjhdh#//Prolly loved presenting her W|ll Sm|th style; even if the attention it drew to him too did make his skin crawl more often than not#//Love the idea of him stalking Traveler thru their journeyw lil heart eyes; interfering at key moments to hinder or help them progress#//Depends on how he’s feeling at the moment jcbcb#//In this verse would deffo butt heads with Taru in Fontaine specifically—he wants Traveler’s attention too jfbfb#//Prolly met them in Mond as part of Signora’s lil entourage—IMMEDIATELY got intrigued at first glance#//Background wise; I like to think he was a Fatuus meant to infiltrate the knights like many of Eroch’s ppl#//And in the progress of going through the knight thing got acquainted w Luc & began to have doubts abt the Fatui cause#//After visiting his home; hearing abt and meeting his father; then the day of the Heckening happens & they fight#//Bc Kae already planned to come clean & renounce the Fatui & Khaenri’ah; but the mess Crepus’s death made of him#//Tried far too hastily; far too bluntly to tell Luc the truth of his origins; swearing he knew nothing abt the Delusion#//Only to get claymore’d; which absolutely helped cemented him into the Fatui’s ranks more#//A part of him knows it wasn’t the time to say it; that he is at fault for trying to take advantage of Luc’s vulnerable state to tell him#//Only for the lad to have been far too volatile & so it turned out badly; but he still blames Luc for the break of their bond#//Anywho; I like to think as of Inazuma; he does have a certain grudge against traveler bc of Signora#//Before; encounters were more of puppy love bordering on dangerous obsession—after that; the dangerous bit became Personal#//Ohhh I’m writing a yandere here; okay<-should have realized that from the FIRST slew of Fatuiverse hcs lmao#//He genuinely does love Traveler; would like to see them breaking down in despair in his arms#//The two of them together would make a most beautiful ice sculpture indeed#//Even with his grudge; Traveler does stand a chance at swaying him to actually be helpful#//Sumeru quest wise; Co||ei is the magic word—i like to think he came along with there bc he wanted to see abt the Eleazar#//And maybe find clues to her family or even her herself; Traveler or Paimon dropping the name would make him cooperate SO fast#//Klee in Mond is basically his Teucer jffb. She is as good as fam in his eyes—I like to think he keeps up his habit of collecting pyro ppl#//Bc he never got over his broken bond with SOMEONE. Even if this verse has him more bitter abt it#//But ye jdbdbd. Is it rlly a Allie posting if it not short lol blurb and then heckin TAG SPAM lololol
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The weight of the world is a heavy burden
Especially for a child
(Or, in slightly less dramatic terms – I imagine that the first of her past lives that Avatar Suiren [who is the Avatar after Aang instead of Korra in my AU, and also Ghazan and Ming-Hua’s daughter] gets to talk to is Yangchen, because she is too plagued by memories not her own [including Jetsun’s death, fun fact]. And Yangchen wouldn’t want another child to go through what she did on their own)
(Or maybe someone just needed an excuse to draw @katkastrofa’s latest obsession in a context that interests them as well, just in time to maybe cheer her up a little? You can’t prove anything)
#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#Avatar Suiren AU#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#yangchen#original character#sotrl suiren#if you’re wondering what the context is. Suiren is around 8 or 9 here. already having revealed herself as the Avatar to her parents#and it has been Hard. because as much as they try to maintain a sense of normalcy for her. it’s clear that things have changed#they never accounted for their daughter turning out to be the Avatar. they hoped Aang dying on the night she was born to be a coincidence#all of their plans now have to be rethought and put on hold because her safety is more important than anything else#she is never blamed for anything. she is still just as loved. yet there’s now a heaviness in their gazes whenever they look at her#the Avatar as a concept should not exist. it is too much power and responsibility for one being who is ultimately human#that’s what Suiren was taught. so what do those teachings mean if she’s the Avatar?#basically.. a whole lot of cognitive dissonance and she hasn’t even been alive for a decade yet#and all her life her head was filled by strange memories and dreams. fragments of lives not her own. sometimes nightmares#and usually her mama would comfort her through it but tonight… she just wants to be alone#so she wanders off. not too far. but enough that she wouldn’t be heard. and just softly cries#because it’s too much. because she doesn’t want to be the Avatar. why her? why not anyone else?#and as she whispers that she wishes she wasn’t the Avatar. her mind is assaulted by memories of previous Avatars saying the same thing#it really is a never ending cycle of too much burden being placed on a single person. but that realisation is anything but comforting#she begs for it to stop because that grief of life over life spent pushing a boulder uphill is just Too Much#and before she knows it. it ceases. only to be replaced by a blue glow visible even through closed eyelids#and a feather light touch of hands on her face. it doesn’t feel exactly like human hands by virtue of belonging to a spirit#that helps her relax a little. reminding her of mama’s touch. she looks at the person who appeared before her. her mind supplies the name#‘Avatar Yangchen?’. she whispers. but the woman is nowhere near as stoic and peaceful as she’s shown to be in every depiction of her#she looks.. sad. concerned. as burdened by grief as Suiren herself is. she’s not just a legendary figure from a time long gone#not yet another past life Suiren would never measure up to. she’s… human. capable of human emotion. just like Suiren is#I’m not sure how their conversation goes and have no inspiration to come up with anything. but I just wanted to draw them interacting
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JoJo Siwa doesn’t deserve all the hate (and homophobia) she’s getting for her style and music; but she does deserve scrutiny for defending Colleen Ballinger and being both active and complicit in abuse that happened on her TV show. Like the girl has been under the public eye in unhealthy environments all her life; cut her some slack — not too much; she’s still a responsible adult — but if you’re going to dogpile her, then at least dogpile her for the right reasons. Jesus Fucking Christ.
#jojo siwa#discourse#Her comment sections are VILE#I actually don’t hate her songs. They’re basically early-2000s new old stock and I like early 2000s music#Is she trying too hard to look like an “adult?” Yes. But that’s understandable.#What isn’t understandable is screaming at children for no fucking reason#and JoJo not helping at all when a girl was hemorrhaging out her belly button#when JoJo’s mother told the girl to “put a pad on it”#I don’t care how afraid you are of your parents; you END that shit the second you see it#I was raised in a cult and I actively sabotaged my parents’ preaching work on multiple occasions#I didn’t know if I’d get kicked out if they found out I did that; the only reason I still have a relationship with them#is because they never found out about my later sabotage#Dad preached to a waitress dangling a cure for her sons’ disorder in front of her nose as incentive to join and gave her literature#So I went to the restaurant with him and insisted I pay for the tip.#I gave her eight dollars and a sticky note with a bunch of keywords about the cult’s abuses to look up#The next time I went there#she said didn’t understand the sticky note and asked me while he was gone what I meant#I hate talking to people especially when I’m under pressure because I trip over my words even when I’m NOT anxious#But her kids’ lives being free of a cult meant more to me than avoiding a momentary discomfort so I gave a quick rundown#She thanked me and heeded my warning basically playing along with me and not saying anything to my dad about it#I was 20; JoJo was about 19 when her show was going on#She had no excuse for allowing her mom to do that.#At the very least she could have said “Oh god I’m so sorry she said that. Please don’t hurt yourself for my show; go to the hospital.”#But no. She didn’t do that. In fact she screamed at children and joked that if they were crying then it was a good show.#Bitch come here and do that in front of me. I double dog dare you. I may only be 5’5” but I fight dirty and I’m angrier than you#Sorry. I guess I do hate her… for THAT specifically.#Like yeah I’ve fucked up with the kids I help and yelled when I didn’t have to but I HATED doing it and tried to do better later#Why someone would SCREAM at kids on purpose for long periods of time for no reason is beyond me
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i know i’m only 22 but good LORD
#i’m so tired i need to just like fastfoward until like 29 and hope it’s all fixed idk#my partner thinks they’re going to have to go to court over this fucking estate shit so basically everything we’re doing up here rn is to#just look good for a magistrate it’s not actually getting us any closer to a sale of ANYTHING#and we’ve spent so much time and energy on the unit to try and clean it to sell it back just for the mutt to say oh but x needs to get done#and then that just goes on FOREVER#but we can’t ignore the unit for the house bc if it goes to magistrate we look just as petty as him so we should keep up the good will (air#quotes) so that it looks like he’s the only one being a dick if it goes to court i’m just do#SICK OF IT#and my partner is so stressed all the time but nothing is actually being done#no matter what we do it never ends#RAH#「mercury speaks」
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Got an idea to turn toxic!ex bf Simon into this weird fucked up situationship because no relationship with Simon in any universe can be considered even in the realm of normal. Like reader is moaning how she doesn’t need him, she hates him, but still has her eyes roll back when he fucks her in just the right angle. Meanwhile Simon’s still convinced that they’re dating and every insult that spills from her lips is just a form of brattiness that he’s convinced folding her in half on a nightly basis will cure.
#basically what I’m trying to say here is Simon’s not letting you go#and you’re too dickmatized to ever think about fucking anyone else#but also too stubborn to admit you want him back#robo speaks#call of duty#call of duty smut
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Hi just a heads up that I’m probably gonna be online a little less in the next 5-ish days, I’m very busy irl and am also flying to another part of my country in a few days for a Thing and idk if I’ll have reception (or good reception at least) so uhhhh yeah I’m good!! I’m okay 👍 just (maybe) online less for a little bit
(but gonna be here tomorrow but maybe just less)
I just like to let people know so they don’t worry or anything when I suddenly disappear :)
#But honestly might be here just as much#Because I am very chronically online and life finds a way :D#Made a Luke birthday best moments comp though and I will probably find a way to post that on his birthday (on tiktok)#And will be active like normal until then probably#But who knows#idk#not me#but do not worry if I am online slightly less is basically what I’m trying to say :)#Fic list might be a few days behind due to this too but I’ll try to keep it updated o7#emu rambles#idk tho#haha I’m just chronically online and worry about people worrying lol :)#Anyway :))#emu rambles?#idk what tags are
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So the natural conclusion of a fifth installment is that Nikki fails to stop the apocalypse in Shining Nikki too…. RIP
#honestly I really just want to know like. who else is there#because to me the draw of the nikki games has always been the cast and the lore#so I wanna know what era of Miraland we are talking about here.#and whether they’re going to wipe out the cast of shining Nikki via timeline resets and alternate times the way they did with LN#I hope they don’t try to do a BoTW apocalyptic style setting just cause it’s open world :/#or a legends of arceus early settlement era type setting. just cause it’s open world :/#basically what I’m saying is give me the TOWNS the CITIES the WEIRD HERMITS WHO LIVE IN ENCHANTED GROVES#if there is not at least one strange reclusive man with inexplicable charisma for living alone in the woods of Cloud I am screaming#Nikki is nothing without her friends 😭 we’ve been through this
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the future is really freaking me out i don’t know how i’m supposed to be in college in a year that’s so freaking scary. but! thinking about the concept of riding the bus or other form of public transportation. 👍 i can’t drive nor have i made any effort to learn how to and i am turning 18 in. 4 months and 10 days. so. y’know. i gotta love walking and buses and the like. and i do i think (i can listen to my music :). )
#remy rambles#there’s actually a bus stop near my house that goes to the city i should try to take that bus sometime to see if i can Survive basic tasks#the fact that my peers have cars and jobs and future prospects is insane to me#i had 1 job for six months and then i got so so stressed out i had to quit#not cause of the job really because of school..but i can’t quit school!#man..i don’t like growing up. but at the same time i’m desperate to do it. like. i can’t keep being a teenager for much longer i am#at my limit with that. but i just need like. a several months long training on how to be An Actual Human Being before they just#put me out in to the Real World#they can’t just do that!#who is they. what am i saying.#i just want to go to art school and hang out but i don’t want to move away and i don’t want to stay here and i don’t want to pay for school#and i don’t want to get a job and i don’t want to meet new people and i do want to meet new people but i don’t want to leave the few people#i’ve managed to find.#every time i try to bring this up with my parents i almost start crying and they tell me we’ll talk about it Later but we’re#running out of later! i would appreciate some help!#ANYWAY i love thumbs up emoji 👍👍 thumbs up
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ive finally become coherent enough to put together my thoughts on the our dining table ep bc yes i have been crying since thursday, but i don’t think i’ll ever be able to put into words how much i adore how they did this episode.
bc the thing is i like yutaka, of course i do. but there has been something since the first ep that has felt… idk, not off about him, imperfect maybe?? he has all this past with his family and loss and his new family that has developed into this trauma around food but also manifests into just him as a person, like he’s half naturally shy and awkward but that’s also bc of his experiences, which together makes how he acts and behaves and who he is totally ok, fine, understandable and such. but i get this a lot which perpetually shy, timid, removed characters, where I ache so much for them to step out their comfort zone, be brave, have confidence bc i not just want happiness for them but I know it’s there right in front of them for them to grab, and it gets to a point where I almost circle round to getting annoyed with them, like there’s only so much that shyness can hold you back before i as a viewer lose patience or become frustrated, which is both rich coming from me, a perceptually shy to a fault person, but is probably also me manifesting frustration at myself. all that is to say i saw yutaka slowly finding happiness with minoru and i was so happy for him, only for him to then be so unable to do anything when minoru kissed him. he saw his happiness disappearing and it hurt him and yet he just did nothing despite feeling a lot and it was sad and understandable but also kind of frustrating for me personally. i wanted to shake him by the shoulders and say “minoru is the biggest source of joy in your life so go and have it”.
but then this ep happens and you get that moment with his family, these people built up to be these people he felt uncomfortable around and unloved by, and instead you get this brother who, after some initial meaness that sprouted from jealousy, which is very understandable for any child getting a sibling, just wanted a brother, who loved him despite not getting anything back, who cared for him and tried to include him. and then the parents walk in and they’re not these cold, upper class people you imagine, they’re just smiley and cheery and happy to see a son who keeps ignoring them and not coming to see them. they don’t even broach that with any anger, they’re just happy to finally see him. and then it starts to click that when yutaka tells that story about his family, he’s the one that starts to eat alone. yes, he felt a certain way, and in no way am I annoyed or angry at him for that, but he also just removed himself in the face of it, based on something he felt, not knowing whether it was intended or not. and in his life it manifests into this bigger thing when it started as what is basically a misunderstanding, where both sides are at fault for not trying to interact and fix that break in the family. and it’s great bc you only see it, that thing I’ve been feeling under the surface, when yutaka does too. the love was always there, i just hid from it. i ran away, i isolated, i avoided. i did that. and he realises that while yes he can now start to mend the relationship with his family, he ultimately missed out on that love at that time. and now, everything he’s built up in his head bc of that is gonna be the reason he misses out on love and joy again, this time with minoru, instead now he can do something about it, and so he does.
he touches that scarf, that symbol of love that has always been surrounding him, and he runs. he fucking runs and it’s glorious.
and i could pick apart everything about that conversation on the swings, but the moment he said “i want to face it directly. you said you like me.” my god I wanted to give him a standing ovation, i wanted to rugby tackle him with pride and affection bc finally, FINALLY he is not hiding. he is facing it directly, and he says at much. and then he says it for what it is, that minoru confessed and that’s something that happened and isn’t something he wants to avoid or run away from or pretend didn’t happen. he’s not going to return to normal. he’s not going to sit by and just let life pass him by and make the decisions for him, he is finally taking control of his own happiness, bc finally he can overcome his fear that there isn’t any happiness out there for him. he knows it, he’s experienced it, this is his place, he knows it, and he’s not going to lose it. he’s not going to cower, he’s going to trust himself and believe that he is deserving of love, and also trust that the people in his life do actually love him back. he is not leaving space for miscommunication and misunderstanding like he did before, he is going for it, and all that frustration finally disappears bc not only is yutaka going for the things that make him happy, but he is also holding himself responsible and accountable, both for how he misjudged his family, but also for the things happening in his life right now. he’s letting his own decisions be the driving force in his life, and in that way letting himself be accountable for whatever happens as a result. all this time stuff happened ‘to’ him and he never saw his role in it beyond being unliked or awkward or unimportant bc he never believed had one. he didn’t see that he removed himself from his family, bc he thought his family ignored him in the first place, bc he thought he was just doing what they wanted but couldn’t say, that they didn’t want him. realising that he had some of the agency there and is partly accountable for it is such a good turning point for his character bc it perfectly opens up this path to him taking control of his life and using that control to go after joy. it’s realising i am my worst enemy bc i made everyone else into my enemy, and I have the ability to undo that.
yutaka is not just simply this nice, kind, sweet, timid man that had an unloving family at no fault of his own, instead there is so much more nuance. he is not blameless or faultless and it makes him such a more compelling character bc realising that helps him grow. he has to stop seeing the flaws that aren’t there and instead the ones there are, that’s how he can grow, and that’s how he can go about finding happiness.
i don’t know how else to say it. the show is just genius.
#our dining table#this is very much ranty but I hope you get what I’m trying to say here#and in this i wanna make a point of saying i can be annoyed at watching the characters with trauma that i love#it’s the same i kinda got with jaewon in t8s i can both completely understand where your behaviour is coming g from but also be so#frustrated that you let it hold you back and keeps you from happiness#and i can want for you to be better bc while yes it’s not in any way your fault that you have the trauma you do#and it may suck and be unfair but ultimately you’re the only one that can make your situation better#and I can get mad when you try to run away or avoid or repress bc ultimately i as a viewer want that happiness for you so bad#but more so i want you to be able to get it and that journey of that character learning how to let themselves go after that happiness is#almost more rewarding that the happiness itself#idk maybe I’m a sucker for angst and emo shit but that pursuit of happiness is such a basic human need and it’s so good in stories and I ju#and I just love to see that play out
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~INTRO TIME~
i go by Synth online. i probably count as a “tumblr old” (been here since 2011, and i’m even older than the source material my f/o comes from). i’m one of these 🏳️🌈. i do a lot of arts n crafts, and have commissions open. i’m bad at writing about me.
this is my main selfship sideblog- my main blog and the one i'll follow you from is @leadendeath, mostly furry-oriented but personal too, and if you want more general spunch.b0p-related goodness, i’m over at @1percentevil. if you already know me from those places, you are absolutely fine to follow/interact/whatever. i’m only joking when i call myself cringe or embarrassing :))) i’m unnecessarily self-conscious about every action i’ve ever done ever and i gotta get over it somehow.
This isn’t a faq, more like a “things you might be wondering about”:
“What does your url mean?” -the species plankton are called copepods. yay for having a pre-existing interest in marine bio. the 5000 doesn’t mean anything, i just thought it looks cool. and vaguely technological.
“Plankton is already married…” -anyone who loves Plankton, i also love by extension. That includes Karen! luckily i like computers and robots too very much :)
“So are you okay with sharing him?” -See above. Yes! He needs all the love.
“Anniversary?” -23/7/23. i already knew him from years back, but really reconnected with him when i heard a certain song… it was love at first listen. i’ve had few and far between f/os in the past, and every time it was the same “fall for them hard and fast” situation.
“F/O list?” -just the one guy is all i need. :)
Now here’s where i’ll infodump about my s/i…… eventually lol. When I get round to getting a few sketches I’ve done out of “WIP purgatory”, I’ll post about it under the #🦈 tag. I’m a shark, his best(/only…) customer, then shoulder to cry on, then we progress to more… lil dweeb latches on to the first guy who truly doesn’t consider him a loser. i could be talking about either of them there…
❗i now have a toyhouse page for it! backstory and more here❗
blinkie cred
One little thing which i've started putting on all my "about" pages: i've never stated what i would like people to tag for in all my time on tumblr, but i'm making a change for that now. Please tag #cats and #scars for me, i would appreciate it immensely. i'll tag for anything you'd like too! <3
#i heard the first five tags#are the ones that show up in peoples’ tracked tags#so uhh don’t mind me while i#how you say. make five tags.#so that i can continue to hide a little.#*looks around* …is that it? are they gone?? OKAY GREAT >⨀D#i’m joking#s/i is#🦈#tag for the two of us is#🦈💚𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘶𝘱 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘯💚🦈#tag for us three is#🦈💚🖥#i remember to tag unsafe for work a lot but i'm not great at tagging sfw!#regardless i do try to tag sfw in case you want to browse only those type of posts#some things i'm Into which apply to the ship are:#robo#and#gt#if you know what they mean- great! if you don't then don't worry about it :^)#i reply to nice tags by reblogging from prev and replying in the tags...#replies#is where to find those#i won't be brave enough to post my art here; but it'll be under something basic like#my art#ok i think that's about it!
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Seeing everyone praise an author in the comments of a TikTok and I’m wondering if I just read one of her duds or if I just didn’t “get it”
#I’m gonna give the author the benefit of the doubt because tbf the one I read I don’t remember having an issue with the actual writing#moreso I just felt that the concept of the book could have been good but was instead just rehashing famous mistreated women in comics#fuck it I’ll be more clear here and say names and titles#the book I read is the refrigerator monologues#by Catherynne Valente#and idk I was so excited about the premise of wronged women meeting up in the afterlife and getting to interact and engage with each other#but what it actually was was basically just rehashing actual stories of women comic book characters and how they were wronged#with very little interaction between them#like I definitely appreciate what the book was trying to do but I feel like since all the characters are parodies of marvel/dc female charas#there wasn’t enough actual new-ness injected into their backstories#I guess if you view the book as more a collection than a novel it’s better but ehhhh I just feel like I go crazy when I see every review#about this book praise it so extensively#and any bad review is just ‘feminism bad’ which is NOT why I don’t like the book#anyways rant over this is incomprehensible lol#tbd probs#white weasel talks
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I’m taking some community college courses soon and istg if someone doesn’t see the fandom related stickers on my laptop and immediately become my lifelong bff I’m dropping all classes idgaf
#LMFAOOO IM JOKING OBV#likeeee persona fans flock to me please#persona fans out in the wild pls be my friend 😕#“out in the wild’’ I say in reference to the college campus 💀 I’m cooked#my honest reaction as I register for college after years of claiming I’ll never go to college 🤯#LMAOOO#I woke up last month with the random realization that writing is my lifelong passion that I’ve been avoiding fully delving into—#out of fear of failure#so this is what we’re doing now ig!#“Gio what about coding and game development?’’#well unfortunately coding makes me enter a state of misery every time I attempt it#so I’m putting that on the back burner for now#I’m not giving up on it by any means!! but I enjoy writing so much that it seems more sensible for me to pursue that at the moment#ANYWAYS#sorry for always rambling on here 😭 lol#my laptop is actually coveredddd in persona / chainsaw man / genshin impact stickers I’m lowkey embarrassed#I also have an Ib sticker but I’ve never seen like anyone talk about Ib unfortunately 💔#Ib fans where are youuuu#is it unprofessional to have ur laptop covered in stickers am I cooked 😕 idk how college works like at all#I’m so fucked oh my god. LMFAOOO#mfw I lack basic knowledge#I’m trying my best over here fr 😞😞#I ALSO HAVE MIKU STICKERS#can’t forget the miku stickers ofcccc#I’m sure you’re all really invested and interested in what stickers I have on my laptop#I mean this is world altering info. really crazy stuff#💀#someone take the tag feature away from me at this point
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being the oldest daughter raised by a narcissistic emotionally abusive father is just…👩🍳👌💋
#i don’t know why i always end up crying when i know exactly what to expect from him#the constant belittling then turning around and crying victim on how i ‘hurt’ him bc he can’t accept the fact that he did something wrong#i know i shouldn’t expect anything from him but it’s like this stupid fucking useless part of me during these moments is just#so heartbroken and frustrated because it’s not fair the child in me just wants to have a dad that cares and sees her as a human#nobody fuckjng cares if they hurt me and i don’t care if they hurt me either that’s why i hurt me too#he’s supposed to be my dad he’s my only parent left and he never should’ve been a parent to begin#i can’t believe how easily he turns things on me saying it’s my fault i never come talk to him and it’s like how the fuck#you were barely basically nonexistent the first 5 years of my life then barely there from then on out#how could i ever come to you how could i trust you just because i’m your daughter by blood doesn’t mean you’re not a stranger to me#you’re supposed to be the adult you’re my father you’re supposed to come to me and guide me why are you such a helpless fucking child#i do everything on my own i have nothing to say to you just like you have nothing to say to me#small talk only does so much i don’t want to talk to him i don’t care about our relationship#i’m just literally flabbergasted at the audacity he has to gaslight and manipulate me and ply victim when i’m the one he keeps hurting#it just reinforces the idea that my feelings are invalid my feelings have been invalid to him for the past 23years#i wish i was emotionless and unfeeling i wish he didn’t have the power to affect my emotions so strongly#i’m such a little kid i wish my mom was here i wish someone wanted to protect me and talk to me and at least try to understand me#i can’t wait to be dead i just want this to be over i’m just wasting time taking up someone else’s space#i think the only time i’ll be genuinely happy is when i’m dead#i don’t remember the last time i was actually happy unless i’m distracting myself#i’m constantly maladaptive daydreaming and when i’m not i’m at work trying to be a functioning an adult#but as soon as i’m home i’m back in my dream world where i don’t have to think about me at all#when gerard said When i grow up i want to be nothing at All that man read my my mind#ramblings#vent
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