#back on my bullshit posting things for me and only me
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"Could've just as easily been us... imagine if Harkon didn't give you the option to refuse his gift..." Narrator's voice: he did indeed imagine it.
#skyrim#gore skyrim#dragonborn#skyrim cvf#gore x dragonborn#back on my bullshit posting things for me and only me#I don't know what exactly whump means but I'm starting to think that's what I like writing#not star trek#my writing#ao3#I just like putting them in situations#working on one with Remi and Tally bc I adore them too#god Tally just needs a break and Remi needs to be forced to take one
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WAIT WAIT WAIT HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE
So normally we only get fullblown, extended and dedicated flashbacks for heroic characters in One Piece, the characters who we're meant to root for. The literal only TRUE exception we've had to this rule was Big Mom's flashback. Even fucking Doflamingo's flashback was tied to Law and Rosinante's
So the fact that we haven't gotten a single fucking GLIMPSE at Crocodile's backstory is?!?
Like sure, we haven't gotten like a Moria flashback, but you know, he literally told us all we needed to know himself, AND we got to see glimpses of him in the Wano flashbacks. Arlong didn't get a flashback of his own, but he did get to cameo in Fisher Tiger's flashback. And Rob Fucking Lucci got a flashback that was 6 whooping panels long
BUT CROCODILE?? Not only do we know almost Fuck All about his story, but also have never gotten as much as a glimpse at it? But his backstory has been HINTED and TEASED at multiple times??
GUYS. FELLAS
Like. I am SURE the "Full Backstories for Heroes Only" rule is going to get broken again, but with Imu and Blackbeard already there just BEGGING to have their beans spilled, can we even be sure Sir Fucking Crocodile is somehow going to become A Villain So Dangerous To The Narrative that he ALSO should also recieve a Full Fucking Backstory?? For his Nefarious Schemes?? AT THIS POINT??
Y'all
I think it's more likely Oda's been saving up Croc's backstory because it might just completely recontextualize his entire character
#CROCODAD REAL?!#UNIRONICALLY#Sir Crocodile#Crocodad#Crocomom#OP Meta#Moon posting#Sleep Deprivation opened my third fucking eye I can see the fucking Matrix#Unironically this is the thing that has pushed me back into actually believing in Crocodad despite the timeline#Because I genuinely can not imagine how else Crocodile could be turned into an (anti) hero if it's not Crocodad#And I can not imagine his villanous schemes needing a backstory to explain them at this point- not over BB and Imu#And I mean sure maybe we could get three whole Extended Villian Backstories for Imu Blackbeard and Croc#But I just feel like it'd be so unnececary#Because there is no fucking way Crocodile is going to become The Ultimate Villian of the Story again#Not without some Darth Vader bullshit happening#But since he's supposed to be based on Wagnas from Romancing SaGa 2 and Wagnas wanted to SAVE the world#Look I have a whole different post about that waiting in my drafts I'll post it later#Point is!! I can't imagine him becoming The Final Villian!! Not at all!!#Also yes there are characters like Mihawk who have like histories etc that I'm sure many people would love to learn about#The only difference is that we've never gotten as much as a hint at what kind of a backstory Mihawk might have#Meanwhile Crocodile Having A History is something that's been hinted at every arc he's appeared in pre-timeskip#Like we KNOW he has a story we just don't know what it is
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woag was just going into settings to look through my asks and apparently i lost like over 100 followers somewhere in the past like week or two????????????? i mean im not upset, my posts and art suck ass and idk why anyone follows me to begin with and nobody is obligated to stay but im just really confused if i did something now
#like i was literally just feeling relly weird and uncomfortable about having a decent amount of followers#bc like this is my personal blog so a lot of my more personal posts that i dont want people other than my close friends seeing often get-#seen by other people too and i hate it#and i just got an ask that someone was unfollowing me bc they saw my post where i mentioned sh and i felt really guilty for like bringing-#that back up for them but also it was worded pretty rudely and like i added several tw tags but they said they only had cw tags blocked#so uh yeah really sorry to that anon#but yeah just another instance of people seeing my posts too much#i feel very watched every time i post things and i really fucking hate it#and to be clear im not like mad at people for following me thatd be really fucking weird like im super grateful for all the amazing people-#who stick around despite all my bullshit but also i really want to disappear off the face of the earth because of how many people see mposts#scribbles says shit#tw vent#i guess#just in case
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i’m not a transandrophobia truther in the slightest don’t get me wrong, but i think some people on here really need to realize and comprehend the fact that cis women, way WAY more often than not, hold extremely significant social and political power over trans men the vast majority of the time in our day to day lives
#sorry not to get on this bullshit i just saw a related post when i opened this app lmao#and by some people i don’t mean anyone in particular im not vagueing anyone or any specific post#and i especially don’t mean any transfem calling out transmisogynistic transmascs either#but yeah i see a lot of implication that trans men are like. somehow significantly privileged over cis women#and ofc i don’t mean that transmascs are incapable of being misogynistic to cis women bc that’s far from the case#but i need someone to name a transmasc with significant political or social or financial power that’s working to set back women’s rights#versus the amount of cis women with any of the aforementioned privileges working to take away the rights of trans people#bc i can think of 4 of the latter just off the top of my head without trying really hard#and the only day to day instance i can think of where trans men would hold significant power over a cis woman is like..#a workplace environment where he completely passes as cis and absolutely no one knows he’s trans at all or even suspects it#but then again most if not all of that privilege would be stripped away the second anyone there found out he was trans#but yeah i really do think some people need to grapple with how they conceptualize gendered privilege and their own power in these dynamics#and how that’s reflected in the way they think about/interact with transmascs#are you disgusted with this random transmasc on tumblr because he’s a man (or vaguely adjacent) or because he’s trans. ykwim#and again i hate the whole transandrophobia thing i think it’s stupid as shit and redundant to put it lightly and briefly but#idk why transmascs that believe in it have become the new face of anti-feminism and MRA movements#and not like. the cis men who started both of those things and contribute to the vast majority of that type of rhetoric in every way#and also hold enough power to leverage those beliefs over both women and also transmascs tbh#i think some people are just repulsed by the idea of anyone willingly wanting to be a man bc they see it as the same as becoming a cis man#in terms of privilege. when in reality by being trans you’re knocked down in terms of power and privilege from all cis people anyways#but also. some people also need to realize that transmascs can also have trauma and complicated feelings about being a man and patriarchy#and more often than not we ARE traumatized by the way cis men (and women!!) have treated us#and grapple with our place in the world as a result. it’s not just as simple as becoming a cis man over night tbh!!#and again i’m not talking about transfems with any of this because the vast Vast majority of transfems understand this more than anyone#i’m mostly talking about cis women both irl and also just in the terminally online leftist sphere#and i also think i should be allowed to vent my grievances with the power cis women often do wield over me without being accused of being a#raging misogynist or MRA or whatever
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i dont have the right kind of mental illness for BBC merlin to actually make this but in my head there's an animatic of hamiltons "satisfied" involving merlin, arthur, and gwen that Haunts Me
#it haunt me#im thinking bout it again cause i got tunes on shuffle and satisfied came on#i love this fucking song#gwen is fucking. eliza.#the trouble is with merlin and arthur because like. it would make sense to have merlin be angeliica bc unrequited love but also not at all#it would be friends not sisters here but like like like#cause angelicas role better suits arthur for the song w/ being 1st born noble but likeeeeeeeeee. him n gwen aren't like.#the way hamilton talks 2 angelica is very merlin 2 arthur I think. could be other way but works best as merlin = hamilton kinda#the goal is fucking. argwen marriage merlin being depressed Just Like Canon Lads#i have like. parts of the song storyboarded in my head#the only thing i can think of is like. fucking. id be switching povs a bunch during the song to make it make sense#like uhh. arthur would be 1st and 2nd reasons. merlin would be 3rd reason.#it would start as merlin switch to arthur when they start talking then back to merlin for 3rd reason#which is WEIRD but thats the only way it would make sense I feel like????????????????????????????????????????/#with merlin its like. idk 1st and 2nd reasons don't work#ive considered doing fuckiing uhh#morgana as angelica and arthur as eliza and mmerlin as hamilton#that WOULD work best but also doesnt quite have vibes I want. i am more of a morgwen girlie idc about mergana#idk the ship names lmao#ALSO arthur would not mak e a good eliza. he is not all sweet and demure and whatever the fuck. so like#i cant win. i cant win but it haunts me sometimes it would be soooooooooooooooooooo#the love triangle drama. it lives in my head i had this idea like a fucking YEAR ago it Haunts Meeeeeeeeeee I can't escape animatic brainro#bbc merlin#i dont even usually post about my merlin bullshit thoughts#but im pullin an all nighter nad also ive lost my sanity I think#its like sinew sinewy sinewy. slipping. strerciing. ougghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#i will now depart tumblr again for multiple weeks. mwah#lilac post
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how did you live?
like this.
how did you live?
he didn't.
that long pause of Myungha just looking at Yeowoon is both him sitting with the weight of Yeowoon's emotions but also him understanding the desperate loneliness and how lost Yeowoon feels because he felt that so strongly in his own life that he walked into the ocean with no intention of ever coming back out.
knowing that he can't explain that to Yeowoon. knowing that's a burden for himself to bear.
knowing he can't let Yeowoon end up the same way for so many, many reasons.
like this is because of Yeowoon. like this is being here in this reality. like this is being there for this boy, making this boy happy, like this is finding a purpose outside of himself, like this is finding people he genuinely, deeply cares about, like this is gathering a family to himself when he had none left before, like this is taking care of his grandmother better this time, like this is a life built out of love instead of loneliness.
because now he's got Yeowoon, and he is going to live.
like this.
#yeah i posted that big my stand in set like three hours ago and i'm already back on my love for love's sake bullshit AGAIN#who's gonna stop me? not you not anyone#i was supposed to finish only boo tonight and here i am making love for love's sake gifsets instead#i just have so many feelings about them and this show#love for love's sake#love supremacy zone#love for love's sake spoilers#love for love's sake meta#love for love's sake ep3#tae myungha#cha yeowoon#myungha#yeowoon#myungha x yeowoon#mia gifs love for love's sake things#mia gifs drama things#mia gifs things#mia never shuts up about love for love's sake#tw suicide mention
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Dogs of War
WIP | ??? Words
Another AU set in my Freelancers Universe, diverging just before the canonical end of the Swansong Arc. (It's a good point in the canon for divergent plots, alright?)
Wolf's patient, dogged determination has paid off - his handler is off-base, his medical escort will have three guards, and there are three American volunteers who should be eager to play a part in this escape attempt. He hopes they are - because none of them are getting out of this alive if they get caught.
Military setting, captivity, escape, on the run, medical treatment, assumed dead, fear of recapture, betrayal, angst (with a happy ending?), referenced torture and noncon
Trojan
Sheep's Clothing
Judas Goat
Shellshock
Forged
Carsick
In-Between
Gas Station Snacks
Good as New
Rinse and Repeat
Reckoning
Bite the Hand
Dreams and Doubts
Kettled
Interrogation
Manifest
Bad Karma
Watchmen
The Jester
Tied Down
Cooperation
Fumble
Fiddlesticks
Go Fetch
Instigator
Peace and Quiet
The Devil
Soured
Agent
Good Acting
Hellsent
Whispers
Catastrophizing
Regrets
Delve
Hush
#whump#oc whump#masterlist#military setting#escape#fear of recapture#on the run#assumed dead#medical treatment#angst#past torture#past captivity#past noncon#freelancers#dogs of war au#i am back on my bullshit <- using aus as a way to remain engaged w my characters while exploring facets and scenarios#that arent highlighted or possible in canon as a way to better my understanding of these characters and their world#i need to get back to my roots (posting this series non chronologically and randomly) and stop worrying about being consistent#the only thing that matters is if I'm having fun :] and this is the best way for me to have fun with something ive spent now years on
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Welcome back! I love transformers! Which continuity are you interested in? Any favorite characters in particular? Do you have any oc’s? (No pressure if you don’t I’m just curious) <3
Thank you, it's good to be back abfjdbdk! and HECK YEAH TRANSFORMERS 🤝!!!
Thank you for providing me with the opportunity to Talk About Transformers, I will take it graciously and with extreme amounts of vigour and rambling!
Under the cut because of the aforementioned vigour and rambling.
To answer your first question: I'm largely into the IDW (2005) comics, Animated, and Aligned (TFP) continuities! I've also started watching the original G1 cartoon and Cyberverse which has been really fun!! (I'm absorbing so much information. I'm also idly keeping up with the new Skybound comics, which have me yelling screaming crying etc.)
As for characters... I would say I have no favourite/s except I do also own 1 (one) Transformer and well. for something that basically turns into a brick, he gives me immense amounts of joy.
But yes, other than Soundwave, (who has charmed me in every continuity I've seen so far!!) it's a constantly rotating roster because there are SO many characters to think about (which differ from continuity to continuity!!) and I am having the time of my LIIIIFE!!!
It's so funny going from UT/UTMV to TF because UT fans have a lot of focus on Versions of Literally The Same Two Guys, whereas TF has an overabundance of options to pick and choose from (I love both!!! I just think it's very funny in comparison whfjfbek)
Anyway, I am a big fan of a lot of characters from IDW and particularly MTMTE because they're all a bunch of little FREAKS and I love them. But! If I had to pick a few from there, I'm particularly fond of (in no particular order) Drift, Whirl, First Aid, Ratchet, Swerve, Brainstorm, ALSO NAUTICA I love her dearly!!!!
I'm also a Tarn girlie at heart u_u I am not immune to "big bad dude with a mask and a sexy voice just so many problems". Also I have a special place in my heart for Spinister and Pipes rhfjfbejfbk (I love the Scavengers [similarly, a bunch of little freaks] and Pipes makes me SO SAD. WAIT- ANOTHER CHARACTER THAT MAKES ME VERY SAD: IDW SUNSTREAKER. (He was my first taste of the Horrors of the IDW comics and that STUCK with me)
Similarly, I think the Constructicons (+Prowl in IDW) and Combaticons have SUCH fascinating dynamics hjsjkhksjdfh,, combiners got me going crazy... I NEED to find out more about the other combiner teams. It's a fascinating concept.
As for other continuities... Animated has me sick over Blurr, Shockwave and Swindle, and... well, Optimus has intensely kissable lips in this series. Why did they make him like that. I'm also very fond of TFA!Starscream- he was my favorite back when I watched the series as a kid and it was very fun seeing him with fresh eyes LMAO
Fun fact: TFP was a large part of what got me to actually sit down and check out Transformers but... I actually still haven't watched the series itself (つω⊂* ) I just saw TFP!Soundwave and went "OH okay, I love him and need to find out more" which quickly expanded into me going on a deep dive into Transformers, and resurfacing about a month later having read all the IDW 2005 comics and about an equal amount of fanfic for various continuities whfjgbjrbfk,, BUT even though I haven't watched it yet- TFP already has me hooked on Knockout, Ratchet (and Soundwave ofc LMAO)
And the last answer; unfortunately I don't have any TF OCs (ᴗ_ ᴗ。)........
.........YET.
I have many Thoughts but haven't put together any designs because I want to get better at drawin mechs before I jump into making my own! Hopefully that way I have a better idea of how to put em together LMAO. That being said, I Am in fact plagued with ideas!! Like!!! I'd loooove to take a crack at trying to put together a sailplane/glider OC!
(LOOK AT THEM STUPID LONG WINGS...)
Or!! A pair of mechs, one whos an imaging satellite and the other a telescope! (Real starcrossed lovers type deal... both meant to only watch from afar, both longing to be in the other's place/by their side)
I also have a tradition of making sonas that have wings but can't fly, so I kinda want to make a TF sona with a similar concept- either just with good ol doorwings, or maybe a flier with a messed up gyro which causes problems staying upright in the air 🤔
Anyway!!! This is really long again! Oops but not oops because we all knew this would happen. Thank you again for the ask!! (and the excuse to yell about Transformers shfngbekbgm) Now I will return to my daily schedule of listening to. eurobeat and the Transformers Devastation soundtrack. Bye
#velwy.txt#inbox#anon#tbh. u could probably track my various character/ship obsessions via my ao3 bookmarks fhdkf#except uh. pls dont do that. i dont think i can handle the embarrassment LMAO i have so much Raunchy bullshit bookmarked kjdhkjdhtg#ALSO IVE BEEN MEANING TO READ IDW 2019 but. they killed brainstorm like immediately and i just went D: whfjfgjk ill go back to it eventuall#prowl has a bird there. i need to know more.#AND ARMADA. i keep hearing good stuff about it!!!! RAGH#its only been like 2? 3? months. Im in so fucking deep#ALSO WHYD NOBODY TELL ME HOW GAY TRANSFORMERS IS. ESPECIALLY IDW.#i kept going 'WAIT THATS A CANON COUPLE????'#like it exists!!! in canon!!!!!!!!! and isnt just a fandom thing!!!?!?#which also made it infinitely more funny going straight from that to TFA#where i realised that canon shockblurr pretty much has the onscreen chemistry of a guy and the guy he turns into a cube#its fantastic fhfjhfjd i love that its such a popular ship as well LMAO its just inherently hilarious to me#like. I SEE the vision. AND canon is like go girl give us nothing </3#tbh. im surprised i didnt get into Transformers earlier. its right up my alley. there are big robots.#MY TAGS MAY AS WELL BE A WHOLE NOTHER POST AT THIS POINT
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I just realized that some of my posts complaining about all my aching would either make people think that I’m older than I actually am or that I suffer from a chronic illness.
Like no. I’m the same age as the first summer of Punk (like a month older if you count the day he won the title as the beginning of that storyline)
And like the only chronic illness I have is a migraine disorder and all my migraines start from my neck aching.
All the other pains I complain are literally just me not exercising enough
#remind me of this post the day I tell you that I was diagnosed with a chronic illness causing me muscle pain#that day probably won’t come because the only thing that runs in my family is psoriasis and all the women in my moms side got it#well. not all women but like my mom and her mom and my mom’s mom’s sister.#kat whines about stuff✨#life in the eyes of kat✨#also I hate that everyone way older than me says that I should move more. like no shit Martta!#but guess how much aching neck back and hips makes me wanna move? not at all! and like exercise is gonna hurt before it makes me feel good#exercise is such bullshit but I get why it’s important
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god i fucking hate job hunting. i dont wanna "empower customers and drive shareholder value by delivering products at scale". i dont wanna "join a high-performing team and collaborate with cross-functional partners to drive impactful solutions". i dont wanna "help establish a leading brand and accelerate growth in an undisrupted industry". can i just work on a thing that people like or find useful. is that too much to ask
#rambles#its a real grim time to be an avowed genAI hater in the tech industry who doesnt want to help cause outright harm#most job postings matching my skillset are either for plainly evil companies that are actively ruining society and the earth itself#(amazon or meta/facebook or google or what have you)#or doing stupid ai bullshit that *also* helps ruin society and the earth itself#or it's web3/crypto. which obviously also sucks for the same reasons. though sometimes its a fun combination of those 3#i got like halfway through the interview process with a company that was none of those things that i thought would be a really good fit#but i got the “we're not moving forward” email today- given the job posting is no longer up im hoping they just already found someone#as opposed to them rejecting me outright. but i have no way of knowing.#man i just. dont know what to do. the tech industry sucks more with each passing day but its the only thing i have experience in/skills for#if i were to quit & go back to school for something else that would be a huge gamble that would leave me broke#and i probably wouldnt have better job prospects by the end of it- just more palatable ones#like my dream job would be in localization but 1. my japanese isnt good enough so i'd have to spend probably multiple years developing it#and 2. from what i understand its a very competitive & unstable job market with mostly contract/temp work#every day the temptation to just get up and walk in the woods and spend the rest of my days as a hermit grows stronger
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Many people have pointed out (in relation to Crocodad) how in Japanese the etymology of the word "wani" (crocodile) is a bit complicated to say the least and in mythology could mean a variety of things, including a shark, sea monster or a dragon
Which, of course, is quite an interesting coincidence. Crocodile does often get referred to as "wani" not just by Luffy but some other characters, and so it would be just a little funny if both of Luffy's dads were sorta kinda called dragons
There's also people pointing out how Zoro's mother was called "Tera", similar to terra (earth) and Sanji's mother was named Sora (sky). So if Luffy's birthing parent was named after a water-dwelling creature, well, it'd be cute and round out the monster trio's birthing parents in a funny way, since we'd have earth, sky and the sea
But what really is fucking me up about the whole wani-thing is the Myth of Toyotama-hime
So the TL:DR; of the myth is
The pregnant princess Toyotama came from the Ryuuguu Castle deep in the oceans onto land to give birth to her child, telling her husband that when she would give birth, she would revert back into her true form, requesting him to not look at her while she gave birth. But her husband could not keep that promise, so he peeked in on his wife, only to witness a giant wani giving birth. The sight of this horrified the husband so much he fled, while Toyotama princess was so hurt by what had happened that she returned to the sea, abandoning her child.
Indeed, this myth bringing up wani pregnancy is just. An interesting coincidence for Crocodad speculation
Of course, we know Oda borrows from mythology (fucking, Fishman Island's castle is literally the Ryuuguu Castle), so if Crocodad Real, it's genuinely plausible Oda could('ve) take(n) inspiration from that very myth
Thing about it is that though...
Like, if we're assuming Crocodile never fully realized he was trans until he got pregnant, then him transitioning either immidiately or as soon as he could after giving birth would make sense. Dude seeks out Iva-chan and gets the t-juice*, so on and so forth, but my question is like, would that have been before or after delivering the baby to Dragon (so he could then pass it onto Garp)
*(Or hell, maybe Iva-chan was there helping deliver the baby, helping Crocodile crack his own egg etc, maybe the secret Iva-chan is holding over Crocoboy's head isn't that they knew Crocodile is trans and could out them, but knowing Crocodile gave birth to god know whose child)
Because like
How did Dragon find out about his partner transitioning?
Did pre-T Crocodile tell him he was transitioning while handing over the baby? Or did he just leave without an explanation and allowed Dragon to just Take In The Change after it had happened whenever they saw each other again (if they ever did, for all we know he could've just walked away without talking to Dragon again and Dragon just found out either from Iva-chan directly or from seeing him on the news)
Or did Crocodile transition first and then deliver the baby to Dragon without any warning, again, just giving Dragon one hell pf a surprise
In any scenario, how did that even go down?
And we have to ask the sad question of... is Dragon a Bisexual King or not? And would Crocodile have been... afraid of Dragon's reaction? (This would've been a younger Crocodile mind you, who would literally have been just coming out of his shell, and that shit's scary man)
Because if Toyotama Princess is any indicator, this wani's relationship did not end well after her truth was revealed
Like, let's say Crocodile transitioned first and then showed up without warning as a man to Dragon to hand over the baby. Thing is, while we know VERY LITTLE about Dragon still, I can't imagine him being like violently transphobic or even lashing out at his partner when he'd come out. But I could imagine him being so shocked he'd be left utterly speechless.
And I'm not entirely sure which would be worse; Dragon outright but "kindly" telling Crocodile he's not into men and breaking the poor bastard's heart, or Bi!Dragon being too shocked to say anything, letting Crocodile to just jump to conclusions based on his reaction (and maybe then causing Dragon to jump into further conclusions (that Crocodile must actually be into women)), unintentionally causing a divorce out of sheer misunderstanding and literal lack of communication
And the sad part is, considdering Dragon is a very secretive man, who according to the Crocodad Theory can't even have told his partner his full name mind you... The miscommunication seems very plausible to me?? Does it not?
Or, maybe Crocodile delivered the baby to Dragon pre-T and told him he's going to Iva-chan without further explanation, jumping into conclusions, afraid to hear what Dragon would say. So he just leaves without explaining before Dragon gets to say a word. And Dragon just accepts it. Assuming he's the one getting dumped.
Either way, whatever might've happened can't have been good, can it
Also, considdering Garp is a fucking idiot (affectionate), and Luffy clearly inherited The Stupid from his grandfather, I would not be surprised if Dragon was also actually a bit of a himbo underneath that serious face he puts on (either that or Crocodile kept on smoking while pregnant)
Which could also turn what would otherwise be a tragic miscommunication into an absolute comedy if Crocodile and Dragon ever met again and the two realized that they're both idiots who jumped into conclusions and ruined their marriage by refusing to talk about their fucking feelings to each other. This is an absolute trainwreck of a family
But considdering the things Crocodile has done by this point*, would it ever even be possible for the two to reconcile?? Because, althought Dragon is pro-overthrowing corrupt governments especially if they're affiliated with the World Government, from what I can tell, he's still against unnececary violence (Vegapunk even comments that Dragon "hates war" in a flashback) and needless loss of life. And Crocodile caused just that.
*And I don't even mean the failed attempt at taking over Alabasta, I mean the drought Crocodile caused that caused countless people to starve to death and then caused the civil war which had already taken lives and permanently disabled people BEFORE the Strawhats ever even get to Alabasta. Like Crocodile's bomb may have been a dud but he still caused people to die for no reason, and I can't imagine Dragon being fine with that. But then again, Robin and other Baroque Works members also contributed to the loss of life and their sins have been neatly swept under the rug so IDK
And like. We don't know if Crocodile moonlighted as a Revolutionary for like 10+ years after Luffy was born and slowly went out of contact or if he just left immidiately. But theoretically, the two might not have even seen each other in like almost 20 years
That'd be a long time to carry a broken heart
How the fuck would you even heal from that
Also like
Crocodile did seem a little suicidal at Impel Down if I'm being honest
Like.
He had a dream of becoming Pirate King. But he lost to Whitebeard, and his dreams were ruined.
Dude had a master plan to take over a country that took him almost a decade to pull off, only for it to get wrecked in the final hour by a literal child.
His useless underlings then come and try to break him out of prison
And he chooses to stay
When we finally see his face for the first time in Impel Down... His mouth might be forming a smile, but those eyes aren't
And he even says it himself
"I didn't think there'd be anything for me to do if I were free"
Is it not like he has given up on life entirely..?
And sure, he does ask to be let out so he can get revenge on Whitebeard, but was it out of a genuine belief he could actually take down the old man or just a slightly more fun way to die than rotting away in prison for the next few decades?
You know the saying, "to be loved is to be changed"
Frankly, the same goes for the reverse. Being unloved, or believing yourself to be unloveable will change you. For the worse
#OP Meta#Crocodad#Sir Crocodile#I know I keep on saying I don't believe in Crocodad anymore and here I am back on my bullshit again#This asshole is the only thing keeping me from falling apart rn just please let me have this#I'm just so fucking intriqued by the storytelling potential here#Of what the fuck happened#If it's real#The tragedy could be absolutely devastating#Or you could have an insane One Piece slapstick reunion#I am extremely fond of the idea of The Disaster Family mind you#Because they could be so fucking funny (especially if you included Garp) (Holy shit can you fucking IMAGINE)#Like yes emotional reunion between Crocodile and Luffy yes sure#But please considder#Luffy somehow finding out and then demanding for an explanation from An Extremely Reluctant Crocodile#Who can't really do much because he doesn't have it in him to hurt his baby boy but also The Baby Boy is an unstoppable MENACE#The slapstick would be hysterical#Also I am pro-Bullying Crocodile#Moon posting#On a slightly less downer of a note to end on#While Crocodile might've given up on life before Marineford he certainly found a reason to live during/after Marineford#This was supposed to be a short post how did it turn into borderline fanfic
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tw abuse in the tags
#my dad decided that he was going to share his posts on threads where he trauma dumped shit with me and my sister#and it pisses me off so much that he can talk about all the trauma he’s gone through#and all the shitty things he’s gone through#and literally anything and everything that’s happened to him#but won’t acknowledge that he abused me my mom and my sister growing up#i got the worst of it all bc ofc i fucking did my sister was his favorite and i knew from a young age that she was#still is tbh#i’ve only been back in contact with my dad for a little over 5 years and since then there have been 3 separate occasions#where he’s acknowledged what he’s done to me and how it’s affected our relationship#the last one being last year where he actually apologized#but the first was in 2019 when we first started talking again and then again in 2021#and then last year in 2023#and i can’t talk about the shit he put me through bc he shuts down and doesn’t want to talk about it#and it pisses me tf off that he can do literally anything else to better himself#but the minute i want to even throw a passing fancy towards our past he freezes#and i feel like i have to change the subject bc lol dad’s uncomfortable!#i’ll admit i don’t talk about the shit he put me through willingly to anyone not even my therapist#but how the fuck are you going to sit there and trauma dump to the person YOU traumatized? and won’t talk about the trauma with?#fuck all the way off that’s fucking bullshit and we all know it
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#vent#vent post#cw negative#Seven’s Public Diary#wish i wasn’t so fucking worthless and useless and stupid and selfish and mean#i am just so goddamn sick of my own bullshit. but i never change#i’m so tired of being weighed down by my 56492 mental illnesses. i don’t like being like this#my sleep schedule is so fucked up again and im tired of this constant cycle#this constant fight and endless effort to stay on a goddamn routine#all i want for christmas is a goddamn consistent sleep schedule#i hate sleeping through the day and being up all night but it’s like my body was fucking built for that or something#i don’t like it!! i want to be an early bird who goes to bed at 8pm and wakes up before the sun rises!!! but im the exact opposite!!!!!!!#i wish i just didn’t need to sleep at all. that would be the ideal. so many problems would be solved.#no i Really wish i just had the ability to fall asleep and wake up whenever i actually Want To instead of my body calling the shots#fell asleep at 9 this morning and im so mad that i didn’t get up when i was woken up at 11#a 2hr nap would’ve been fine and i would’ve made it through the rest of the day and been able to fucking sleep again tonight#but noOOooOoOo i had to give in to the allure of my warm cozy bed and fall back asleep for 9 more goddamn hours#now once again im too awake and rested to be able to go back to sleep. but once morning rolls around im gonna be exhausted again#and i’ll either give in and attempt to take a ‘nap’ and it’ll turn into a 12hr sleep again#or i’ll have to like. walk laps around the fucking house just to keep myself awake through the day#and i’ll be super irritable as a result and make everyone around me miserable too#but everyone is already beyond fed up with my issues and behavior. rightly so i guess. so i lose either way#god there was so much stuff i was gonna/supposed to do today#i don’t know how much longer they’re gonna put up with me being such a deadbeat#you think that’d like. motivate me to get my shit together or something but no. i’m addicted to being unconscious i guess#sleep feels so fucking good. until i wake up. which is funny bc it’s all nightmares and stress dreams anyway. why do i even enjoy sleeping#i guess bc for the first few hours after waking up i experience some modicum of relief from my other mental illnesses’ symptoms#like a soft reset.#and it’s the Only thing that gets rid of my migraines so god forbid i get one of those bc then i Have to sleep regardless of the time of day#anyways! :) that’s enough whining for one vent post. time to go do something productive
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there was going to be a sappy post about how much my life has changed in the past year since starting this account here but i feel i have bothered you all enough with my feelings on that in recent weeks
thank you all for being here with me, i love you, and happy birthday to this blog :)
#ive had some presence on tumblr for. close to 11 years now but stepped away from the internet as a whole a couple years back for. reasons#and deciding to make this new account was a big step for me and y'all have made it worth it#so thank you to my friends who have been here from the start of this silly little thing#and thank you to my friends who ive only met recently#nyxtalks#there is also not a sappy post because im having a really really rough time but i wanted to mark the occasion somehow#thank you for putting up with my bullshit also
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I have a longing to be understood more than anything else i think
#someone very recently acknowledged something that usually goes unseen and it wasn't even that great of an acknowledgement but ive just been#staring at the messages every once in a while. its great. not really i sort of feel like a real weirdo#im very lonely. i cant say why but let it be known that i am very lonely#ok i have a question to those who lie their eyes upon this post: tell me what you know about me please?#so much lies in my social perception and i am just. not being perceived. at all. darn#i have a lot to cry about but morally i dont think i should-- specifics would mean being mean to the people i love#talking to anyone anymore just makes me feel horrible. doing anything anymore makes me feel horrible..tmbg has my back though ill live for#another.week or a few. and then my birthday will happen and rhen um#.Well. it sucks that sucks man. i dont want to disclose my age but to elaborate on why ACTUALLY HOLD ON#the thing i am about to say is not true; it is a metaphorical thing: it is my 21st birthday soon.#i decided that i wouldnt live past this age around 5 years ago and the only reason ive lived five years is being killed this year. i dont#think every thing ive been desperately clinging on to for the past 2 (?) years can keep me alive past then..i think im going to die. i have#to#NO MORE BEING A DOWNER#fox (vulpes vulpes) on the Internet for the first time#okay maybe a little more..i dont know who im talking to in this post. my friends do not read my tumblr and. i dont know anyone else.really.#uh#I'm listen to tmbg right now i love them#hey reader; i can only think of 3 people who see enough about me to check my blog. so i have separate questions for the each of you.#one of you likes (liked? school came in and i couldnt see your blog much past then; idk if its changed) tmbg. what do you think of The Else?#and uh you there... the guyyy. Google john flansburgh..i dont have a reason to this one ive just not been able to stop thinking about askin#you what you think of him.#um third person..... um#okay theres nothing iecan ask. i do want to apologize to you though: im sorry.#iThis is bullshit#im gonna delete this soon#Um also sorry if my wording here is. really wack. i tend to do that#i dont think anyones going to see this as is always#i think i just like talking to the hypothetical beast. yeah
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Well clearly I am confused.
#My art style keeps changing and every time I do something new#I yearn for the days of old#where i want to draw what i used to draw like but also loathe the anatomical inconsistencies#i think 2020 may have had my best works which sucks because i'm on the decline#text post#lana please shut up#i also want to ask why there are mmx fans that keepndrawing charactera with#odd skin tones that are very drastically different from canon#it confuses me greatly#is it from an au or some sort of fic that isnpopular on here#or a fanon type thing because it seems to be consistent between select artists#i think skin color alteration is very strange on canon colors#i just end up collecting characters with my skin color like miruko or grey instead of altering things#its odd but fine i think i just dont understand the motivation behind it#actually it's kinda reverse of what artists do to faputa on pixiv#it makes me feral when people make faputa reg's skin color and then go “it's the lighting”#as if to say if you put me under a white light then i too shall be white in skin tone#or god forbid they have someone say indoors and become an entirely different race#maybe both ways makes me mad idk#i just hope it isnt the same thing that happened with dave strider back in homestuck days#it might be and i'm in denial#i will probably stick to canon skin colors for my fanart#unless the skin tone varies in the ref images then i'll bullshit it#adding tags is like whispering#but most of my characters (human looking) have whacky skin tones#by which i mean theyre usually everything but pale#but at the same time#the only pale character i can think of is the stark white one that is based on 0²#and i guess my tiger character but he has vitiligo since he was made Back Then when it was a fad#everyone else is fucking green or orange or somethign
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