#at least you're doing it from a basis of what she's actually like

[pepperf]

There are so many things to be annoyed about the TUA s4 debacle, and I am exploring every one of them. This is not a particularly joyful thing for me, I don't run on spite, but I guess I just need to work my way through this.

TODAY'S ANNOYANCE! Read at your own peril! Dead dove, do not enter, I'm venting about both fandom's and Five's attitudes towards Lila.

I remember how much vitriol and pearl-clutching there was about Lila after season 2. Fandom at large HATED her: she was manipulative, she lied, she drugged Diego, she tried to kill them all, blah blah blah, god it was like people had never watched TV before.

This shifted to a somewhat grudging acceptance after season 3, "Well she's going to be a mum so maybe her claws have been clipped - but OH NO SHE'S STILL MANIPULATIVE, SHE PUNCHES FIVE AND FAKE-DRINKS AND EATS SUSHI?!" (If it's bad for babies, apparently someone forgot to inform the entire nation of Japan).

But now - now that Five "loves"* her, now she's been portrayed as a saccharine shadow of her glorious self, a living mannequin for your favourite blorbo to fuck - NOW you like her? Go fuck yourselves.

If you can't handle Lila at her most chaotic and weird and destructive and terrible, you don't deserve her. Let's be real, it's not about Lila at all. It's not about the character we've seen for the past two seasons. You don't want that Lila, you want some kind of Stepford wife to make Five happy. Which, hey, was apparently what he wanted, too!

For the record, and to stave off some of the flames I may be provoking, I think this version of Five is equally bullshit and feels like they twisted the character to fit the plot they wanted, rather than following what he'd been like previously. I mean, I do think he has control issues, he's forever telling people what to do, but he's not, in general, an emotionally-stunted manchild, and he's definitely better than this.

*Tell me, gentle readers, is it true love to lie to someone for six months about something that you know is vitally important to them, and then claim you know what's best for them, and then fucking sulk about it when they turn you down, or is that being an emotionally-stunted manchild with control issues? And some people think that is the height of romance! Are you on crack? Are you in a cult? Knock three times if you need help!

[sophiamcdougall]

You're a reasonably informed person on the internet. You've experienced things like no longer being able to get files off an old storage device, media you've downloaded suddenly going poof, sites and forums with troves full of people's thoughts and ideas vanishing forever. You've heard of cybercrime. You've read articles about lost media. You have at least a basic understanding that digital data is vulnerable, is what I'm saying. I'm guessing that you're also aware that history is, you know... important? And that it's an ongoing study, requiring ... data about how people live? And that it's not just about stanning celebrities that happen to be dead? Congratulations, you are significantly better-informed than the British government! So they're currently like "Oh hai can we destroy all these historical documents pls? To save money? Because we'll digitise them first so it's fine! That'll be easy, cheap and reliable -- right? These wills from the 1850s will totally be fine for another 170 years as a PNG or whatever, yeah? We didn't need to do an impact assesment about this because it's clearly win-win! We'd keep the physical wills of Famous People™ though because Famous People™ actually matter, unlike you plebs. We don't think there are any equalities implications about this, either! Also the only examples of Famous People™ we can think of are all white and rich, only one is a woman and she got famous because of the guy she married. Kisses!"

Yes, this is the same Government that's like "Oh no removing a statue of slave trader is erasing history :(" You have, however, until 23 February 2024 to politely inquire of them what the fuck they are smoking. And they will have to publish a summary of the responses they receive. And it will look kind of bad if the feedback is well-argued, informative and overwhelmingly negative and they go ahead and do it anyway. I currently edit documents including responses to consultations like (but significantly less insane) than this one. Responses do actually matter. I would particularly encourage British people/people based in the UK to do this, but as far as I can see it doesn't say you have to be either. If you are, say, a historian or an archivist, or someone who specialises in digital data do say so and draw on your expertise in your answers. This isn't a question of filling out a form. You have to manually compose an email answering the 12 questions in the consultation paper at the link above. I'll put my own answers under the fold. Note -- I never know if I'm being too rude in these sorts of things. You probably shouldn't be ruder than I have been.

Please do not copy and paste any of this: that would defeat the purpose. This isn't a petition, they need to see a range of individual responses. But it may give you a jumping-off point.

Question 1: Should the current law providing for the inspection of wills be preserved?

Yes. Our ability to understand our shared past is a fundamental aspect of our heritage. It is not possible for any authority to know in advance what future insights they are supporting or impeding by their treatment of material evidence. Safeguarding the historical record for future generations should be considered an extremely important duty.

Question 2: Are there any reforms you would suggest to the current law enabling wills to be inspected?

No.

Question 3: Are there any reasons why the High Court should store original paper will documents on a permanent basis, as opposed to just retaining a digitised copy of that material?

Yes. I am amazed that the recent cyber attack on the British Library, which has effectively paralysed it completely, not been sufficient to answer this question for you.  I also refer you to the fate of the Domesday Project. Digital storage is useful and can help more people access information; however, it is also inherently fragile. Malice, accident, or eventual inevitable obsolescence not merely might occur, but absolutely should be expected. It is ludicrously naive and reflects a truly unpardonable ignorance to assume that information preserved only in digital form is somehow inviolable and safe, or that a physical document once digitised, never need be digitised again..At absolute minimum, it should be understood as certain that at least some of any digital-only archive will eventually be permanently lost. It is not remotely implausible that all of it would be. Preserving the physical documents provides a crucial failsafe. It also allows any errors in reproduction -- also inevitable-- to be, eventually, seen and corrected. Note that maintaining, upgrading and replacing digital infrastructure is not free, easy or reliable. Over the long term, risks to the data concerned can only accumulate.

"Unlike the methods for preserving analog documents that have been honed over millennia, there is no deep precedence to look to regarding the management of digital records. As such, the processing, long-term storage, and distribution potential of archival digital data are highly unresolved issues. [..] the more digital data is migrated, translated, and re-compressed into new formats, the more room there is for information to be lost, be it at the microbit-level of preservation. Any failure to contend with the instability of digital storage mediums, hardware obsolescence, and software obsolescence thus meets a terminal end—the definitive loss of information. The common belief that digital data is safe so long as it is backed up according to the 3-2-1 rule (3 copies on 2 different formats with 1 copy saved off site) belies the fact that it is fundamentally unclear how long digital information can or will remain intact. What is certain is that its unique vulnerabilities do become more pertinent with age."  -- James Boyda, On Loss in the 21st Century: Digital Decay and the Archive, Introduction.

Question 4: Do you agree that after a certain time original paper documents (from 1858 onwards) may be destroyed (other than for famous individuals)? Are there any alternatives, involving the public or private sector, you can suggest to their being destroyed?

Absolutely not. And I would have hoped we were past the "great man" theory of history. Firstly, you do not know which figures will still be considered "famous" in the future and which currently obscure individuals may deserve and eventually receive greater attention. I note that of the three figures you mention here as notable enough to have their wills preserved, all are white, the majority are male (the one woman having achieved fame through marriage) and all were wealthy at the time of their death. Any such approach will certainly cull evidence of the lives of women, people of colour and the poor from the historical record, and send a clear message about whose lives you consider worth remembering.

Secondly, the famous and successsful are only a small part of our history. Understanding the realities that shaped our past and continue to mould our present requires evidence of the lives of so-called "ordinary people"!

Did you even speak to any historians before coming up with this idea?

Entrusting the documents to the private sector would be similarly disastrous. What happens when a private company goes bust or decides that preserving this material is no longer profitable? What reasonable person, confronted with our crumbling privatised water infrastructure, would willingly consign any part of our heritage to a similar fate?

Question 5: Do you agree that there is equivalence between paper and digital copies of wills so that the ECA 2000 can be used?

No. And it raises serious questions about the skill and knowledge base within HMCTS and the government that the very basic concepts of data loss and the digital dark age appear to be unknown to you. I also refer you to the Domesday Project.

Question 6: Are there any other matters directly related to the retention of digital or paper wills that are not covered by the proposed exercise of the powers in the ECA 2000 that you consider are necessary?

Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.

Question 7: If the Government pursues preserving permanently only a digital copy of a will document, should it seek to reform the primary legislation by introducing a Bill or do so under the ECA 2000?

Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.

Question 8: If the Government moves to digital only copies of original will documents, what do you think the retention period for the original paper wills should be? Please give reasons and state what you believe the minimum retention period should be and whether you consider the Government’s suggestion of 25 years to be reasonable.

There is no good version of this plan. The physical documents should be preserved.

Question 9: Do you agree with the principle that wills of famous people should be preserved in the original paper form for historic interest?

This question betrays deep ignorance of what "historic interest" actually is. The study of history is not simply glorified celebrity gossip. If anything, the physical wills of currently famous people could be considered more expendable as it is likely that their contents are so widely diffused as to be relatively "safe", whereas the wills of so-called "ordinary people" will, especially in aggregate, provide insights that have not yet been explored.

Question 10: Do you have any initial suggestions on the criteria which should be adopted for identifying famous/historic figures whose original paper will document should be preserved permanently?

Abandon this entire lamentable plan. As previously discussed, you do not and cannot know who will be considered "famous" in the future, and fame is a profoundly flawed criterion of historical significance.

Question 11: Do you agree that the Probate Registries should only permanently retain wills and codicils from the documents submitted in support of a probate application? Please explain, if setting out the case for retention of any other documents.

No, all the documents should be preserved indefinitely.

Question 12: Do you agree that we have correctly identified the range and extent of the equalities impacts under each of these proposals set out in this consultation? Please give reasons and supply evidence of further equalities impacts as appropriate.

No. You appear to have neglected equalities impacts entirely. As discussed, in your drive to prioritise "famous people", your plan will certainly prioritise the white, wealthy and mostly the male, as your "Charles Dickens, Charles Darwin and Princess Diana" examples amply indicate. This plan will create a two-tier system where evidence of the lives of the privileged is carefully preserved while information regarding people of colour, women, the working class and other disadvantaged groups is disproportionately abandoned to digital decay and eventual loss. Current and future historians from, or specialising in the history of minority groups will be especially impoverished by this.  

[subbmissivesuccubus]

No Nut November ~

a/n. A request by my Patron for the month of November! It was quite the fun one. If you'd like me to write a story for you, please consider joining my Patreon! (link in bio)

Contains : Toji X Fem reader. No nut November antics. Toji being horny. Reader being a tease.

"Fuck-" you cursed, panting heavily as you lied back on the bed, finally getting a break. Your partner, Toji, lied down next to you, half as tired but just as satisfied. He hummed as his muscled relaxed, hot and sweaty from the numerous rounds of sex, completely naked as he got comfortable enough to drift into sleep.

You couldn’t help but frown at him, a bit annoyed at his satisfied and content expression while your body was crying from the over-stimulation. He had taken you over and over and over again, his stamina seemingly never ending as he fucked you multiple times in multiple positions. Even when you complained that you couldn’t take it anymore, he claimed that he’d make you take it. And after he pumped you with several loads of cum, he finally called it a night.

"You- you're such a horndog." you said. The man chuckled, manhandling you to get closer to him, placing you on his chest before giving you a sweet kiss on your hair. “You love it.” He teased, giving your butt a greedy squeeze, making you flinch as he touched the bright red mark he had left on your cheek before. 

This was your routine. Toji and you would go to work, you'd come back home, have dinner together before he took you to the bedroom and gave you the most toe curling, back arching, pussy squirting pleasure you'd ever experienced. The man had a huge dick and a ton of stamina, not going soft unless he's cum multiple times.

And it's amazing it truly is.

But after a while...it becomes a lot. There's only so many times your pussy can take a pounding before she gets sore and it starts to hurt even when you sit down. There's only so many times your nipples can get suckled on before any friction, even from your bra, makes them ache. There's only so many times you can wear a turtleneck before people connect the dots. You tried to say so to Toji, letting him know of your trouble but he either laughed it off, took is as a compliment and continued to fuck you silly regardless.

His desire for you and his constant want to have his hands on you was a big ego boost, but you needed a break and you figured out the perfect way to do it.

“Have you heard of something called No Nut November?” Toji snorted, looking down at you amused, “Sounds stupid. I’m guessing it means you don’t cum in all of November?” “Exactly. It’s an internet challenge. Think you can do it?” He chuckled again, not taking it seriously, “I have a beautiful girlfriend who I can fuck on a daily basis- why would I give that up for a dumb internet challenge?” “Hmm, thought so.” You said, acting unimpressed as you poked his nose, “There's no way you can keep your hands off of me for a month. You don't have the self-control. Why am I not surprised?"

Now, Toji knew what you were doing. You were baiting him, plain and simple. And was he going to fall for it? Of course not... but he didn’t like your tone.

"Wanna bet on that?" he asked.

You tried not to grin, the man falling for your trap hook, line and sinker. There was no way a man as proud as him would not rise to the challenge just to prove you wrong.

“Fine. From tomorrow until the end of December, you can’t cum.” You said, “That means no sex and no jerking off. If you fail, I get to decide when we have sex for at least a month.”

“And if I win, you are going to be my little sex doll I can fuck whenever I want with no complaints.” Toji challenged. You scoffed, more than confident that he wouldn’t be able to do it.

“Deal!”

~~~~~

One week had gone by and it was already hell. Toji had to will himself to not drag you into the bedroom every night, the condescending smirk on your face actually giving him motivation to keep going. Ever since he started dating you, sex was a common and daily occurrence so to have it taken away was difficult for him to navigate but he could do this. He was an adult with self-control and he wasn’t a horny teenager who needed to get their rocks off all the time.

But during week two, he wondered if he truly had the self-control he thought he did.

You were not making it easy for him, oh no. You were a naughty little minx and once Toji went by one week with no sex, you realised you needed to make him break. Whether it was make-out sessions with a bit more tongue than you normally use, or ‘forgetting’ to lock the door while you showered so he’d walk in on you naked, or going to bed in nothing but his oversized t-shirt, or asking him to give you a massage and letting out sweet, filthy little moans as he worked out the knots. These small things were piling up, riling the man up even more to the point where in a sweet kiss from you would make his dick hard. You were good. But he wasn’t giving up.

But neither were you. And you decided to ramp it up for week 3.

“…And what are you doing?” Toji asked, looking you up and down and undressing you with his eyes. You were standing by the bedroom door, looking absolutely stunning in a lingerie piece he hadn’t seen before. It was a beautiful lace red piece, the underwear framing your body deliciously. Your tits, your stomach, your ass and the heaven between your legs- all the blood instantly went to his cock just by looking at you.

“Tojiiii~” you cooed, walking over towards him, your hips swaying seductively as you reached him. He was sitting against the headboard of the bed, idly scrolling through his phone but the random video he was watching was all but forgotten as you crawled between his legs. Your tits were practically swinging in front of his face as you straddled him, the man unable to deny you as he placed a hand on your waist, running his fingers over the soft lace.

“I’m so horny, Toji~” you cooed, rubbing your hand up and down his covered chest, “I need you.”

“Nice try.” The man responded, snorting as he flicked your forehead with his other hand, making you gasp, “I know your game here, little minx. You’re not getting me to fuck you.”

“How mean.” You said, pouting adorably and showing off the lip gloss you had put on, “If you’re not interested, then this can probably go on past November-“ “Not a chance.” Toji growled, gripping your waist so tightly it made you gasp, “You know I’m owning that pussy once this month is up. So be a good girl and wait.” “Wait?” you repeated, raising an eyebrow, “Why do I have to wait? I’m not doing the stupid challenge.” You smiled at the way Toji’s eyes followed you as you got off of him, bending over in front of him as you reached for a familiar drawer in the bedside table.

“Just because you’re not going to fuck me doesn’t mean I can’t have fun~” you said, holding up your favorite wand vibrator as well as a thick, vibrating dildo. “It’s not as big as you, but it’s good enough~”

  What proceeded was the worst yet best night of Toji’s life. He watched as you pleasured yourself, your sweet moans echoing through the room as you fucked yourself with your toys. With the vibrator rubbing your clit and the dildo sliding in and out of your pussy, you practically gave him a private show. Your lingerie was still on your body but pulled aside to expose your breasts and your cunt, making you look so delicious he just couldn’t keep his hands to himself. He didn’t dare to touch himself as he helped you along with your session, growling dirty things into your ear as he took over and fucked your cunt with the dildo, working it way better than you could yourself, groaning in delight as he suckled on your nipples as he drove you over the edge.

His dick was so hard it felt like it would explode. But he wouldn’t budge. He wanted to- God he wanted to- but he was going to stay strong. The reward he’d get for sticking with this at the end of the month would feel way better than the momentary pleasure he’d get from rubbing one out. So he stayed strong. Days went by, feeling longer and longer and your antics growing more and more bold. Your masturbation sessions were happening often, you were walking around the house in skimpy clothing, he’d wake up and find that you had ‘accidentally somehow fallen asleep with your face close to his cock’ but try as you might, you couldn’t break him.

He increased the ice-cold showers. He took longer working hours to distract himself. He fingered you so he could remind you of how good he was going to take you once the month was up. Hell, he even took up meditation to try and ease the tension in his body. And finally. Finally. After all that hard work- he made it.

He did it. He actually did it.

He was on the last day of November.

A full month of no sex. No pleasure. No jacking off. His cock hurt and his balls ached so badly, dying for some release and he couldn't wait to get it. Tonight, when the clock strikes midnight, he was going to take you and pound the shit out of you- fucking you so hard you won't be able to walk for days. He made sure you knew it too. Throughout the day, he was whispering filth to you, growling in your ear and palming his cock in front of you, loving the blush on your face as he detailed all the bad and naughty things he was going to do to you tonight. There was no doubt you felt defeated and after this, he was going to break and punish you.

Just an hour. He could do this. He was going to do this!

He was lounging on the couch of the living room, not focusing on what was on the TV as his mind was occupied with lust when he saw you walk out of their bedroom and upto him.

"How do I look?" you asked, twirling around so he could see your outfit. It was a cute short dress with a pair of leggings and he hummed in approval.  

"You going out?" he asked.

"Yup!" you said, suddenly dragging a suitcase from behind you, "I’m going to my parents’ house."

Toji raised his eyebrows, his eyes widening. What?

What?

"Excuse me?" he asked, watching as you dragged your suitcase over to the door.

"Sorry, I forgot to mention it before." you said casually, clearly ignoring the expression on his face, "Last minute plan- you know how it is."

"Bullshit." the man snarled, walking upto you before slamming his hands on the wall behind you, caging you, "You're just trying to fuck with me, aren't you?"

"Whatever do you mean?" you asked, a curious tilt in your tone which told Toji all he needed to know, "I just miss home and I know you have a busy workday tomorrow so I didn’t think you’d want to come. That’s not a problem, is it? I’ll only be there for a week.”

“A week-“ Toji growled, nails digging into his fist as he still cornered you against the wall, “You’re not fucking serious.”

You shrugged, faking innocence, “I mean, is there any reason I shouldn’t go? I have a few days off from work and my mom has been begging me to come by someday. The train leaves in…” you checked your watch, ignoring Toji’s scoffs at your audacity, “thirty minutes. So I better get going-“

“You’re not going anywhere you little brat!” Toji snarled, his patience snapping. There was no way in hell he was going to let you leave and have you been gone for a week. He was confident you were just bluffing but he was not taking that change. With a growl, he bent down and threw you over his shoulder, making you yelp as you were suddenly held upside down. He gave you butt a sharp spank, a slap so hard it made you forget how to breathe for a second before he stormed towards the bedroom.

“Wh- what about the bet?” you asked once he threw you onto the bed, Toji immediately getting undressed as he practically ripped his shirt off.

“Fuck the bet.” He said, grabbing you by the ankles before he pulled you towards him, a feral look in his eyes as he fisted the fabric of your tights, “Fuck No Nut November. And fuck you.”

You gasped as he started tearing apart your tights, the fabric ripping away like paper as all he could think about was fucking you. You could see the imprint of his cock straining against his sweatpants, you man already hot and bothered and eager. Your heart was beating fast in your chest, the excitement over-riding the fact that you were going to win the bet. Once the tights were torn enough and before you could even get a second to complain, he flipped you onto your stomach.

He slid your panties to the side, so desperate for you that he couldn’t be bothered to properly undress you before he grabbed two greedy handfuls of your ass. You mewled under him as he squeezed, the man spreading your cheeks apart before he dove in, face first. You yelped as Toji took a long, rough lick of your pussy, the familiar sensation something you truly missed since the start of the bet. You gasped and moaned as he started feasting on your cunt, his thick tongue sliding into you and working you open, your pussy slowly getting wet for him.

Toji growled against you, the vibration making you feel even better as he got you hot and bothered. His cock was so hard it was genuinely hurting him, the sensation of your pussy against his tongue and the taste of your sweet nectar making him go into overdrive. But even your pussy wasn’t going to make him forget how you pissed him off.

“Mmph- this isn’t for you- got it?” he snarled, smacking your ass once to get your attention, “I’m getting this cunt wet enough to fuck my fat cock deep inside you. I don’t care if you feel good and I don’t give a shit if you cum or not- you’ve gotten enough of that this month.”

“Don’t be- ah- mean.” You protested, gasping as he suddenly pulled away from you and flipped you onto your back again. “Oh, I haven’t even gotten started.” Toji said as he grabbed the hem of your dress and pulled it up harshly, also not caring to take it off completely. All he wanted was access to your tits and once he pulled your bra upto your chin, he got what he wanted. “You’ll see just how mean I can be.”

He took a nipple into his mouth before you could say anything, not wanting to hear anything out of your lips unless it was moans, cries or apologies. He slid his fingers into your panties, his thick digits sliding between your damp pussy lips, the slick sound of the contact echoing through the air. Despite the attitude, he knew you missed him too. Dildos just didn’t compare to him.

He slid a finger inside you, the glide easy due to your wetness as he slowly but thoroughly started stretching you out for his cock. Your fingers were in his hair, tugging at it harshly as he suckled on your nipple, his tongue twirling the sensitive bud around before he bit down, making you yelp from the pain. You rocked your hips against his fingers, arching your back as he slid a second one inside you before scissoring you open just how you like it.

“Fuck- good enough.” Toji said, separating from your nipple (which he indeed sucked raw) and gently taking his fingers out of you. He knelt between your legs after he gave you a quick peck on the lips, pushing his pants down to reveal his cock. Your eyes widened at the sight, your pussy throbbing as you gazed at the member you practically hadn’t seen all month. It was rock hard and twitching, precum leaking out of the tip that was so red, you wondered if it would burn your tongue if you sucked on it. His balls were always big and heavy and you didn’t know if the time apart muddled your memory a bit but you swore, they were somehow bigger.

  “Spread those fucking legs- show me that pussy.” Toji said, gripping his cock before he started tapping it against your cunt, purposefully targeting your clit and making you tremble from each hit, “Look at that. So needy and dripping even though you fucked yourself on that dildo every other night.”

He spat on your pussy, making you gasp at the vile action but it made your cunt gush even more. He truly was using you like he owned you. His cockhead rubbed at the glob of saliva that was trailing down your cunt before he finally, finally pressed it against your entrance.

“I won’t last long, but I don’t care.” Toji said, rocking his hips lightly as he teased your hole, “You’re here to be my cum dump. You’re here for my pleasure, got it?”

You couldn’t help but he bratty even though every fibre of your being wanted to beg the man to just fuck you already: “Enjoy it since I’m winning this bet~” “Oh, are you sure about that?”

You frowned at his words before your eyes widened and you looked over at the clock to see that…it was midnight. November was officially over. And you had lost.

“That- ah!” you screamed loudly as Toji plunged his cock into you, his girth splitting apart your wet, velvet walls as he pushed into your cunt. He laughed as he got inside you, eyes rolling to the back of his head as he felt your pussy wrap around him, that sweet, amazing feeling of your walls squeezing him greedily. He grabbed your legs by the back of your knees before pushing them upto your chest, catching you in a mating press, driving his cock deep, deep inside you.

“Fuck! Fuck- fuck!” you squealed, the whiplash from realizing you lost to the sensation of your cunt being stuffed full for the first time in a month making your head spin, “I thought- you- fuck!” “Nice try baby.” Toji snarled, body trembling as he got to feel your cunt again, his balls already threatening to spill his seed inside you, “But you’re going to have to try harder- fuck yes- if you wanna beat me~”

He lifted his hips up and thrust into you again, both of you moaning as he stuffed his cock deep inside your delicious cunt. He started picking up the pace, the nasty sound of his balls clapping against your ass was music to his ears as he started using you. This was for him.

“You’re my toy now, understand?” he asked, tightening his hold on your legs and keeping you nice and folded for him, “my sweet little fuck toy that I’m going to use to break every. Single. Fucking. Night!” he thrust harshly at each word, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you felt his cock deliciously slide inside you, truly owning you. You hated to admit it, but you were secretly happy he won. As he pounded into you, you couldn’t help but remember how torturous this month was for you as well.

Sore pussy be damned, you were too addicted to Toji to give him up.

And while you swore you had more time before midnight struck, you were too cock drunk to think about it. Which was good for Toji as he thought ahead and might have changed the timing on the clock to make it a touch faster. But what you didn’t know wasn’t going to hurt you and by the time he was done with you, you’d forget how to count anyway.

[rocknrollwhcre]

Love Can Burn Like A Cigarette

Pairing: Eddie Munson x F! Reader (18+)

Content Warning: strong language and profanity, emotional manipulation and toxic relationship dynamics, physical altercation (slapping, shoving), depictions of verbal arguments and intense emotional distress, themes of infidelity and jealousy

Summary: Things aren’t looking good between you and Eddie…

A/N: divider by @saradika-graphics !!! Not that anyone will remember, but I originally wrote and posted this fic back in 2022. I ended up deleting my work and blog for personal reasons, but I’ve decided to rewrite it and post it again. :)

You barge into the backroom of Scoops with Robin trailing close behind, her footsteps quickening to match your angry stride. She opens her mouth as if she’s about to say something, but one look at your flushed face convinces her otherwise. She watches you with concern as you yank off your sweat-soaked shirt, tossing it aside with a huff. The sticky uniform you're required to wear stares back at you from a hook, and you mutter under your breath, wishing you could burn it.

Robin, always the practical one, moves to the mini fridge, fishing out a cold bottle of water. She places it gently on the small, cluttered table between the staff lockers. "Here," she says softly, her eyes never leaving your face. She drops into one of the worn-out chairs and pats the seat next to her, giving you that familiar look that says, I’m here. Talk to me.

You take the offer, sinking into the chair with a long sigh before gulping down half the bottle in one go. The cold water is a relief, cooling you from the inside out. You finally feel the tightness in your chest start to ease.

Robin tilts her head, her brows knitting together with worry. “Okay, so what’s going on? And why do you look like you just ran a marathon?”

“Eddie Munson,” you spit out the name like it’s poison.

Robin’s face scrunches up in disgust. “Ugh. Gross. I swear, if you and Eddie—”

You shake your head, a dry laugh escaping your lips. “No, nothing like that. I’m all hot and sweaty because we got into this huge argument. I refused to get into his van, and he just smirks and says, ‘Fine, walk to work then.’ Can you believe that? Complete asshole.”

Robin’s eyes widen. “Are you serious? You’re like, miles away from here! You could’ve passed out from heatstroke or something.”

You snort. “Well, according to Mr. I-Failed-Senior-Year-Twice, it’s ‘just a short walk.’ The guy’s idea of distance is as bad as his grades.”

Robin chuckles, shaking her head. “Honestly, how do you even put up with him?”

You shrug, feeling a mix of frustration and something else—something like the smallest hint of amusement. “I ask myself that every day.”

Just then, Steve pokes his head through the small service window, trying to look casual, but you know he’s been eavesdropping the whole time. His eyes shift between you and Robin, but he settles his gaze on you with a pointed look. “Eddie’s here. Wants to talk to you,” he says, his voice heavy with the kind of sarcasm that only comes from dealing with Eddie Munson on a regular basis.

You exchange a knowing glance with Robin, who raises an eyebrow. “But, hey, at least he knows when he’s wrong and can apologize,” you suggest, half-convincing yourself as you grab your ridiculous sailor hat. Robin gives you a doubtful look, but you ignore it, adjusting the hat with a small breath to steady your nerves. Maybe this time will be different, you think, as you head out to the front, hoping for an apology but bracing yourself just in case.

Eddie is waiting by the counter, leaning against it with that trademark smug grin plastered across his face. His hair is a wild mess, and he looks far too pleased with himself.

“Hey, princess. How was the walk?” he asks, his tone teasing as his eyes gleam with amusement.

You roll your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest. “Oh, it was great, actually. I’ve heard getting some sun is good for you—something about vitamin D,” you shoot back, your voice laced with sarcasm.

“Glad to hear it,” Eddie replies, barely missing a beat. “Because you’re gonna need another dose. My van’s busted, had to leave it at the garage for repairs.” He picks up one of the flimsy menus from the counter and flips through it like he actually cares what's on it.

You narrow your eyes. “Uh, don’t you mean we have to walk home?”

He looks up with a lazy grin. “No, I mean you have to walk. Funny thing, I bumped into Roxy on my way here, and she very graciously offered to give me a ride home. You remember Roxy, right?”

How could you forget? The mere mention of her name sets your teeth on edge. Roxy, the redheaded bitch who’s been circling Eddie like a vulture ever since you two got together three years ago. She’s got that classic bad-girl look down: leather jackets, tight skirts with ripped fishnets, blood-red nails, and enough black eyeliner to intimidate a raccoon. The kind of girl who fits right into Eddie’s metalhead world. You feel your eye twitch involuntarily, the familiar surge of irritation bubbling up inside you.

You force a smile, though it feels like it might crack at any second. “Is that all you came here for, Eddie?” you ask, trying to keep your voice steady.

Eddie's smirk widens, and you can tell by the glint in his eyes that he knows he’s gotten under your skin. “Actually, since I’m here, how about a small cookies 'n' cream shake and—”

“Oh, would you look at that! We’re all out of ice cream,” you interrupt, your voice dripping with fake cheerfulness. Before he can say another word, you grab him by the arm and start steering him toward the door. “Come back later!”

Eddie doesn’t resist; he’s too busy laughing, clearly enjoying how riled up he’s made you. His laughter echoes down the mall as he disappears up the stairs, probably to waste more of his time somewhere else. You let out an exasperated huff, your patience wearing thin.

Robin, still perched on a stool behind the counter, looks bewildered as she munches on a cookie. “Who’s Roxy?” she asks, her mouth half-full.

“Only the hottest girl The Hideout has ever seen,” Steve chimes in, leaning against the counter and taking a long sip of his shake. His casual tone is enough to make your blood boil, and without thinking, you land a solid punch on his arm.

“Ow! What was that for?” Steve yelps, rubbing his arm and giving you an offended look.

“Get back to work,” you snap, snatching his shake right out of his hand and dumping it into the trash without a second thought. Steve stares at the garbage can, then at you, his mouth agape, but you’re already turning away, too annoyed to care.

—

It’s been five days since the argument, and neither of you has made the first move to apologize. In fact, each day has become a new game of seeing who can push the other's buttons harder, and today, Eddie was clearly in the lead.

You’re wiping down the sticky tables, the sweet smell of melted ice cream lingering in the air, when Eddie strolls in with Roxanne by his side. Roxy’s eyes are all over him, like he’s the only guy in the room, but Eddie seems oblivious to it—or maybe he’s just pretending to be. They make their way to the counter, and Roxy leans over to obnoxiously ring the bell, the sound grating on your nerves.

“What’s a guy gotta do to get some decent service around here?” Eddie calls out, his gaze locked onto you with a teasing smirk.

Robin and Steve are out getting lunch, leaving you alone to man the counter. Lucky you. You toss the rag onto the table and head over to the register. “What do you want, Eddie?”

He leans against the counter, his smirk deepening. “Now, is that any way to greet a paying customer?” he taunts, clearly reveling in the way your eyes flick daggers at Roxy, who’s practically glued to his side.

You let out a sharp breath, summoning your best fake smile, the kind that doesn’t reach your eyes. “What can I get you today?” you say through clenched teeth.

Eddie clicks his tongue in mock disappointment. “Come on, I’m pretty sure you guys have a slogan for greeting customers. Let’s hear it.”

Roxanne lets out a soft, condescending laugh, her lips curling into a smirk.

You bite back a retort, forcing yourself to keep up the act. “Would you like to sail the ocean of flavors? I’ll be your captain today. What can I get you?” The words come out stiff and robotic, practically dragged out of you, but Eddie’s grin only widens.

“Good girl,” Eddie murmurs, low enough that only you can hear, his voice a mix of teasing and something else that sends heat rushing to your cheeks. You can feel your face flushing, but you keep your expression neutral. “Anyway, I’ll have that cookies ‘n’ cream shake. What about you, Rox?”

Roxy leans in closer to him, practically pressing herself against his arm as she gives you a once-over. “I’ll just share with you. Don’t want to eat too much and mess up my figure,” she says, her gaze sliding over you with a smirk that makes your blood boil.

It takes every ounce of self-control not to leap over the counter and throttle her, but you clench your jaw and turn away, focusing on making the damn shake. Your hands move on autopilot, scooping the ice cream, blending it up, and pouring it into the cup, all while you imagine various scenarios where you tell them both exactly where they can shove this order. With forced calm, you place the shake on the counter in front of them and watch as they saunter off to a booth. Eddie's eyes keep darting over to you, but you pretend not to notice, burying yourself in the never-ending list of chores to stay busy and keep from glaring daggers at him.

Just as you start wiping down the counter for the third time, you glance up and catch Roxy reaching over to brush a crumb from Eddie’s lip with her thumb, her touch lingering longer than necessary. Before you can react, the bell above the door jingles, and Steve and Robin come back, a takeout bag swinging in Robin’s hand. She takes one look at Roxy playing at doting girlfriend and makes a loud gagging noise.

Roxy rolls her eyes but doesn’t pull away. You decide it’s the perfect time for your lunch break. Tossing your apron aside, you head for the door, but just as you pass their booth, you feel something hard underfoot—Roxy’s boot. You stumble forward and crash to your knees, the sharp pain shooting up your legs.

“Are you fucking kidding me!” you shout, springing up with fury boiling over. Without thinking, you lunge at Roxy, ready to grab a fistful of that perfect red hair and let loose, but Steve grabs you around the waist, pulling you back.

Eddie jumps up, positioning himself between you and Roxy, his hands wrapping around your fists, trying to contain you. “Babe! Just chill out, it was an accident! You’re making a scene!” he says, his tone somewhere between pleading and annoyed.

“Oh, fuck you, Eddie!” you snap, struggling against Steve’s hold. “You’re the one making scenes, showing up here with that slut!”

“Hey!” Eddie's eyes flash with anger. “She’s my friend, and I’m not going to stand here and let you disrespect her like that!”

You scoff, feeling the sting of betrayal sharp in your chest. “Yeah, a ‘friend’ who’s been trying to screw you for years, Eddie! Open your eyes! You know what? Just go. Get the hell out of here.”

“Fine, we will. Come on, Roxy.” Eddie’s voice is cold, his face hard as stone as he turns his back on you, motioning for Roxy to follow.

You watch, stunned, as he actually starts to leave with her. The disbelief sinks in like a weight in your stomach. You wrench yourself free from Steve’s grip, not wanting anyone to see the tears starting to burn your eyes. Without another word, you storm to the back of the store, your heart pounding with a mix of anger and hurt.

—

Night falls, and it's finally time to close up shop. The last of the customers trickle out, their footsteps echoing through the quieting mall as they make their way to the exits. You, Steve, and Robin work together to pull down the metal gate, the clattering sound signaling the end of another long day.

“How about you join us tonight?” Robin suggests, a hopeful smile on her face as she nudges you. “Steve and I rented a stack of horror movies. We’re having a movie night.”

“Yeah! We can order a ton of pizza, make popcorn, the whole shebang,” Steve adds, clearly trying to sweeten the deal. “Come on, it'll be fun. What do you say?”

Before you can answer, you catch a glimpse of Eddie sitting by the fountain alone, his head down, his fingers tapping absentmindedly against his knee. For a moment, you consider ignoring him, letting things stay the way they are, but something inside you pushes you to try and be the bigger person. You turn back to Robin and Steve. “Give me a second?” you ask.

They exchange a look but nod, standing by the gate as you take a deep breath and head toward Eddie. Just as you’re about to reach him, Roxy appears out of nowhere and slides onto his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck and planting a kiss right on his lips. Your stomach twists into knots.

“Oh my god, Eddie, what are you doing?” you exclaim, your heart pounding in your chest as you step forward, disbelief and hurt surging through you.

Eddie's eyes go wide, and he quickly pushes Roxy away, but she just smirks, satisfied with her little display. “Oh no, baby, we’ve been caught,” she says in a mocking sing-song voice, her eyes glittering with mischief.

“What? No!” Eddie stammers, panic flooding his expression. “Babe, it’s not what it looks like!” His hands reach out toward you, desperate to explain, but you slap them away, the sting of betrayal sharper than anything he could say.

“I hope you have a happy life together!” you shout, your voice breaking as you reach for the necklace around your neck—the one Eddie made for you, his favorite guitar pick hanging from it. You rip it off in one swift motion and throw it at him, the small piece of him that you once cherished now clattering to the ground between you. “We’re fucking done!”

“Baby, please, don’t do this!” Eddie's voice cracks, and he reaches out, grabbing your arm in a last-ditch effort to stop you. His eyes are desperate, pleading, but you’re beyond reason now. Without thinking, you use your free hand to deliver a sharp slap across his face. The sound echoes in the near-empty mall, startling even you.

You yank your arm free, turning away as the sting of your slap leaves a red mark on his cheek. Steve and Robin are at your side instantly, and as you storm off with them, you don't look back. But you can hear the ragged breath Eddie takes, his shoulders trembling as he stands there, one hand cradling his stinging cheek, his eyes wet with tears that spill down his face. He's crying, but you don’t let yourself turn around. Not this time.

[barrenclan]

sorry if this is spoilers bc we might learn more later. I'm super confused with Rainhaze's thought process. When he was saying its pointless. like. I get not wanting to go back bc he killed his mom. but what did that have to do with Asphodelpaw? Couldnt he just walk away? Did he see her and decide he wanted to be part of Defiance? And this was the tipping point to prove it? I'm super confused. Was it because if she left she'd tell someone? I assume we'll get a better explanation later?

Absolutely! I've actually been waiting for a chance to really dig into this. Like Rainhaze himself, his issue is written with a lot of confusion and uncertainty, and it's not very straight-forwardly, so I understand why his motivations are easy to miss. So here it is!

Firstly; Rainhaze as he existed in BarrenClan and Rainhaze as he is now are two very, very different beasts. Obviously he's still the same person, but he's gone through a mountain of trauma, violence, and was forced to confront the fact that if pressed, he would kill a family member - even his own mother. Sure, in the moment he was threatened into doing it, but it opens the possibility that he'd even do that. Maybe he would've done anything to protect his family then, but it's been a long time.

Then, over many months, he's subjected to propaganda, murder, and terrible treatment. His mental state from where he was when he killed Dustfeather is massively changed. He's depressed, listless, and much more willing to kill. Not only that, but Defiance propaganda has worked on him.

(Issue 24)

With so much constant killing in his life, and being constantly vulnerable, he begins to see death as a good thing. Something that ends suffering, something that doesn't really matter in the end.

(Issue 28)

So now we're at Issue 31. Rainhaze is in a "doldrum", like Ranger says (a period of inactivity or lethargy). He's so torn between his new life and new beliefs, and his old regrets and old connections to BarrenClan, that he's basically attempting to end his own life through inactivity. Ranger doesn't want this. Here's his plan:

Ranger knows that BarrenClan lives opposite the forest, across the prairie. He specifically orders Rainhaze to "kill something", planting that idea in his mind. He's hoping that Rainhaze will find one of his Clan members, and make the decision to kill one of them. This would push Rainhaze over into whatever full breakdown Ranger wants, and solidify his ties to Defiance. And that is what happens. So why did Rainhaze make that decision?

We already have the basis of an incredibly traumatized Rainhaze. He views himself as he is now, and who he used to be, as different people. And he belives that's completely beyond redemption.

Yes, all those months ago he promised he was suffering in Defiance for his family and Clan, but it's really hard to hold onto those noble morals when you're being put through hell every day. Rainhaze hasn't even seen his family in months. They don't seem real to him anymore.

Then he is finally confronted by Asphodelpaw, the symbol of everything he's put himself through torture to protect, and all he wants to do is go back to Defiance. And here we go, getting to these lines;

Rainhaze is a coward.

He's separated from Deepdark and Ranger, by at least several days. He could absolutely come home with Asphodelpaw and warn all of BarrenClan - they could evacuate in time, be far away by the time Defiance arrives on their territory. But then he'd have to face his family, face his sister whose mother he violently murdered. Have to stand there and have them look at him and know him and see the scars on his body.

When he says, "this is vile, pointless, irredeemable, monstrous", he understands that killing Asphodelpaw is a disgustingly cruel action. He knows that. He understands that he's choosing Defiance over her, and over them. But that's the choice he feels he needs to make to protect himself. He's not thinking about his family any more.

So he does something so completely vicious and irredeemable that he is forced to choose Defiance. Because there's no way that any BarrenClan cat would forgive him for this. There's no way he would forgive himself for this.

And thus, Rainhaze figures himself out, and burns every other bridge entirely. He makes his choice.

[flightfoot]

You know, thinking about it, Marinette and Alya take really different approaches to figuring out who did something, whether they're guilty, etc. And I'm not just talking about with Lila, this was established with Chloe back in Despair Bear.

Denis Damocles: So, some smart aleck had the bright idea of calling the fire department. (the students gasp shocked) Somebody amongst us thought it would be funny to waste the fire captain's valuable time. Fireman: Yes, in fact, if you wouldn't mind I... Denis Damocles Hold on! I want the guilty party to apologize to you. Marinette: (whispers to Alya) I'm sure it was Chloé. I saw her on her phone right before the alarm went off! Alya: You seeing her make a phone call isn't solid proof. Marinette: (sighs)

Alya does not like Chloe. She does not think Chloe is a good person. She believes that this is the sort of thing that Chloe would do. But she still isn't going to make the leap that Chloe's definitely guilty, at least when it would involve an actual public confrontation. As Alya pointed out, seeing Chloe on the phone right before ISN'T solid proof. It's evidence, but it's not enough.

And then with Lila, Alya also wants some actual solid evidence before leaping to the conclusion that she's bad or publicly accusing her. While Alya's willing to take positive statements from others at face value or may leap to conclusions if those conclusions aren't too harmful to the person they're about, for anything that would result in an actual accusation, she really wants solid evidence, the kind of thing that you could actually argue in court and not be laughed out for.

Marinette, meanwhile, relies more on prior experience and vibes to determine whether someone is guilty of something. She knows that Chloe's a troublemaker and bully, so if something's gone wrong, she'll immediately conclude that Chloe did it. She knows that Lila's a liar, so she concludes that she's lying about everything (such as her various disabilities and injuries) whether she has evidence of Lila actually lying about that or not. And she knew that Chloe's was a jerk and that her only "friend" Sabrina was an accomplice, so when Chloe spoke positively about her friend and then that friend showed up and appeared to be doing something with gum on her chair, she didn't believe that he was taking the gum off.

It's the two basic methods of determining whodunnit that I see used generally in everyday life. Do you rely on reputation to determine who probably did something, or do you have to wait and try to gather solid evidence that'll hold up better? What's the consequences if you're wrong? And if you're relying on reputation to determine who the culprit is, then you're screwed if someone else has had different experiences with that person than you have, because that's the basis of your argument for them being the culprit.

[lassify]

Behind Test Subject 007: The Science of Anya’s Telepathy

Okay guys… I’m gonna come clean. I’ve had some scientific hypotheses brewing for a while now (not least to use in my fanfic, lol), but since we might be getting close to getting an Anya arc in the SxF manga, I figured that now was as good a time as any to actually try to arrange those theories in something resembling coherent and share them with you all. 

Disclaimer: I am not trying to position myself as an expert. I have studied Psychology and Cognitive Neuroscience at university level, so just for fun I ended up doing a ton of research on this, and I’ve got a lot to cover, so… wish me luck 😅 References will be embedded in the text!

Heads up that this is on the long side and complex as hell and my head physically hurts, so I’ll tackle it in sections:

Part 1: Psychology

My actual subject, but I’ll only skim over a couple of theories…

Part 2: Cognitive Neuroscience (Structural basis)

In which I will look at the individual brain areas which could be relevant to telepathy

Part 3: Cognitive Neuroscience (Functional basis)

In which I talk about how those brain areas communicate to each other

Part 4: Physics

I’ll admit, not my strongest subject, but I’ll mention a couple of theories which could be relevant

If you're ready for your brain to melt, feel free to keep reading...

Part 1: Psychology

There are 2 main theories in Psychology which could offer some explanation for Anya’s psychic abilities. 

Theory 1: Theory of Mind

In short, this describes a person’s capacity to understand other people. It is similar to sympathy or empathy, but actually it is the ability to understand that another person is different to ourselves, that they have their own desires, motivations, and thoughts, and that this is reflected in their behaviour. Even more importantly, it’s about being able to decode other’s mental states, whilst still being able to differentiate it from our own.

Any parent will know that it is a real effort to teach children about trying to understand other people’s perspectives: this is because children typically have an undeveloped Theory of Mind, and it is something that continues to develop even into adulthood. In adults, having a developed Theory of Mind helps us to understand other people’s perspectives, predict other people’s behaviour, and use both empathy and deception. 

Anya has a really strong Theory of Mind, which is actually so impressive for her young age. She understands the complex web of all the secrets: that Twilight is a spy, Yor is an assassin, Yuri is in the Secret Service, and Bond is precognisant. She also understands who knows what about each other, and how she can use all of this information to her advantage - those are some crazy cognitive skills!!

In terms of how this is related to telepathy, you could argue that someone with a strong Theory of Mind (like Anya) may be more likely to:

Understand that people have hidden feelings that they don’t show 

Demonstrate empathy for emotions 

Collate information about their likes and dislikes and past behaviour to predict future behaviour. 

If she is highly sensitive to these things, then it could look like telepathy (even if it isn’t). 

Theory 2: Hyperesthesia.

Many people will have heard of synesthesia, which is a synthesis of the senses to the extent that the sensory information overlaps, but hyperesthesia is about being highly sensitive to external stimuli of the senses such as sight, sound, taste, smell, and touch. 

I can imagine an overlap with Anya’s hyperesthesia and her Theory of Mind to pick up on the nuances of other people’s behaviour, to the extent that reading behaviour could inform the sensation of “reading minds”. 

In a science-fictional world like SxF we could imagine that hyperesthesia could stretch into the sense of extra-sensory perception, by being sensitive to the electromagnetic signals in other people’s brains (or even geomagnetic - more on that in Part 4). From this, it is possible that Anya could “read” people’s minds through deciphering the electromagnetic waveforms that people’s brains might project (more on deciphering brainwaves in Part 3…). 

Part 2: Cognitive Neuroscience - Structural Basis

I think we can all agree that Anya’s telepathic powers would largely be supported by the specific structures of her brain, especially given that Endo has already dropped hints of neuroscience in the manga, and we know that he’s very much interested in accurately depicting psychology and neuropsychology in his story. 

The best way to encourage certain brain areas to develop is by doing exercises and tasks which would use that part of the brain repeatedly: for example, consistent gymnastics practice would enhance the cerebellum, the centre of balance and motor coordination. But, I can picture the experimenters in SxF trying something a lot less… humane.

Like, experimental neurosurgery. 

For example, theoretically, they could artificially enhance certain brain areas by using a neural growth factor serum (this doesn’t exist in real life, but let’s indulge the science fiction elements for a second), and, theoretically, if the experimenters used glycoproteins as the serum’s main content (like laminins and netrins), they could control the pace and direction of neurons growing in a brain, choosing to focus on cellular growth in certain areas. Then, they would be able to view the activity of the targeted areas using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI), and measure it with electroencephalography (EEG, see Part 3 for more on this).

If Anya ever had experimental neurosurgeries during her childhood, they would have likely focused on the following areas: 

Corpus Callosum: The corpus callosum is the thick structure of white matter that connects the two hemispheres of the brain, allowing each hemisphere to send signals to the other. With an enlarged corpus callosum, Anya would be able to process neural signals at a much faster rate, and at an increased volume, helping her to process the additional load required for telepathy.

Wernicke’s Area: Named after German neurologist Carl Wernicke, this part of the superior temporal gyrus (usually of the left hemisphere) is a major part of being able to understand language. With an enhanced Wernicke’s area, Anya would be more sensitive to decoding the neural signals associated with linguistic thoughts, effectively enabling telepathic communication through language. (As an aside, this would also give Anya an advantage in understanding other languages… which could explain her natural talent with Classical Language!)

Superior Temporal Sulcus: This is another area that is important for processing human speech, and is critical for processing social cues, such as understanding others’ intentions (including Theory of Mind!). With experimentation in the STS, Anya would be better able to decode the subtle cues in others’ brains relating to thoughts and emotions.

Inferior parietal lobule: As well as assisting in the interpretation of language and sensory information, the IPL is also involved in tasks like perspective-taking and understanding others' mental states. By increasing connectivity in this area, Anya can "tune into" the thought processes of others. It’s also well-known for its’ role in visuospatial processing, which can help Anya see visual thoughts as well.

Anterior Cingulate Cortex: This system is composed of a number of different parts of the brain, all working together to be able to process things like attention, decision making, inhibition and emotions. Most interestingly, it is associated with detecting conflicts and errors. Increased sensitivity to the ACC would likely help Anya to detect cognitive dissonance and conflicting thoughts in others (the perfect formula to eventually understand tsundere tendencies…).

Amygdala: The amygdala is often known as the centre of fear, but actually it is hugely important in threat detection, emotional processing and emotional memory. If Anya���s amygdala was enhanced, this would aid her ability to detect threats quickly, as well as her empathy skills and help her to intuit others’ emotions and thoughts. (A negative side effect of an enlarged amygdala would be that Anya may be more vulnerable to the effects of toxic stress, possibly making her less resistant to the effects of psychological trauma.)

Mirror neurons: Mirror neurons specialise in helping us to carry out and understand other people’s actions and behaviours, playing a key role in empathy and Theory of Mind. These hold internal representations of thoughts or actions, and could potentially be the key for Anya to be able to translate another person’s thoughts or intentions, assuming that she has a particularly active mirror neuron system.

Precuneus: The precuneus is really difficult to research and is super complex, so I’ll do my best to keep this simple: Located in the medial parietal cortex, this part of the brain is essential for visuospatial imagining and processing, as well as episodic memory, self-reflection, and some aspects of consciousness. I suppose the main thing is that it has a big role in mental imagery, including being able to model other people’s views, therefore helping Anya to process the mental images in other people’s thoughts.

Broca’s area: This is very much non-canon, but I imagine that if Anya ever developed the ability to project her thoughts, the Broca’s area would be key for this. While Wernicke’s area helps with speech understanding, Broca’s area is key for speech production. In my fanfic (SSS), Anya’s Broca’s area probably functioned normally for most of her life, but in the recent experiments imposed on her, the ability to project her thoughts was ‘unlocked’ through the increased activation of the Broca’s area.

Part 3: Cognitive Neuroscience - Functional basis

The thing is, it’s not enough to just know which parts of the brain work for what - there is also the question of how they connect and work together to be able to fulfil their functions. 

Think of it as the wiring which connects the parts of a computer: a motherboard, mouse, keyboard, and graphics card (as examples) are built to fulfil their specific functions, but the real magic is in how they connect and send signals between each other so that everything works smoothly.

That’s where neural oscillations come in - otherwise known as brainwaves. These are generated by the action potentials of nerve cells, and their different speeds can be measured using electroencephalography, or EEG machines, which can measure the patterns of activity across a brain.

Let’s bear in mind that I’m really skimming the surface of this subject, so I won’t go into all the types of brainwaves in too much detail, but I will focus on the ones that I think could be more relevant to Anya’s telepathy:

Gamma waves

This is the pattern of neural oscillations which are correlated with large-scale brain network activity, and are largely predominant in learning, working memory, and processing new information. In other words: gamma waves help Anya to connect all the different parts of her brain which are relevant to her telepathy, so that all the areas can communicate to each other.

(Just as an aside: I found this hilarious study that looked at the effects of different types of nuts on brainwaves, which saw gamma wave responses being improved through pistachios, while peanuts aided in generating more delta waves. I wonder if the lab scientists of SxF caught on…) 

Theta waves

Theta waves are especially prominent in childhood (during sleep). I imagine that the lab may have recruited children partially for this reason (the other reason would be that brains have more plasticity at a younger age, and so can be altered easier than an adult’s brain). In adults, theta waves are also prominent in hypnotic or meditative states, mind wandering, and the early stages of sleep.

I think it is really interesting that theta waves occur during deep relaxation, as well as the early stages of sleep, making it the only brainwave that can activate both during sleep and during wakefulness. (From what I can tell, anyway.) This could make theta waves an important component of Anya’s telepathy - for example, if her telepathy was important to her survival, then it is critical for her to be able to detect thoughts during sleep, and her amygdala could alert her if the thoughts were at all threatening.

During wakefulness, I can imagine that Anya’s theta waves serve as the precursor for the activation of psi waves…

Psi waves

Just to confirm, Psi waves are definitely fictional, but my rationale is that historically, ‘Psi’ (ψ) has been used to denote the unknown factor which is linked with parapsychology and psychic phenomena. 

My theory is that psi waves would be the frequency required for telepathy, which would allow Anya to detect and interpret other people’s thoughts through their pattern of neural activation. In other words: she can probably read brainwaves. 

Modern science is already trying out methods to interpret people’s brainwaves (which is honestly both supremely cool and extremely terrifying), so it’s not too far out of the realm of possibility that Anya would be able to do the same thing just by unconsciously using her psi waves. The psi-waves would essentially mimic a brain-computer interface in being able to process and interpret neural activity (aka thoughts).

If you require a bit more concrete evidence to believe me, I’ve made a list below.

Right now, we can analyse brainwaves using EEG to:

Decode whether someone answers “yes” or “no” to conversational questions 

Control the movement of simple robots, including wheelchairs, which can be locked/unlocked using EEG (and EMG) as a biometric security system

Detect and interpret what emotion someone is feeling, as well as learn how strong that emotion is (at an accuracy rate of 80-94%)

Deconstruct the cognitive processes underlying social interaction in people who struggle to verbally express themselves

And this study analysed brain activation using fMRI to interpret and reconstruct visual images

Neuroscience is really crazy, guys.

Part 4: Physics

So… this is the part I am the least confident about. Please be patient with me and forgive me for any mistakes 🙏.  Also, this is the perfect time to remind you guys that I am really engaging with science fiction here. Emphasis on the fiction 😂. 

Basically, there are 2 main theories from Physics that I think could explain Anya’s telepathy, as well as her weakness(es):

Theory 1: Geomagnetic Field Sensitivity:

All brain waves are generated by electrical activity in the brain, and they also generate electrical activity of their own, which creates an electromagnetic field around the brain.

Anya’s abilities could be tied to the geomagnetic field of the earth, especially during the New Moon: when the moon is positioned between the earth and the sun, this could affect the field’s strength. The subtle alteration in the geomagnetic field could disrupt the electromagnetic field generated by Anya’s brain, thus disrupting the neural processing. 

In other words: the New Moon could interfere with Anya’s own electromagnetic field around her brain, via sensitivity to changes in the geomagnetic field, which could be why she can’t read minds during the New Moon. 

Theory 2: Resonance:

Resonance can be observed in physics, acoustics, musical, electrical, and mechanical systems - but now scientists are even looking at resonance in consciousness, and resonance in brain waves on a quantum level. 

Without going into too much detail (I am not qualified), I think Anya would generate a resonance frequency of her own that helps her to facilitate telepathic communication: through resonance, Anya could synchronise her Psi waves with the brain waves of another person, and it is this synchronicity that helps her to interpret the other person’s brainwaves. 

If Anya ever encountered another telepath (as she does in SSS), I imagine that they wouldn’t be able to read each other’s minds because their resonance frequencies would cancel each other out. 

In SSS, I also introduced the idea of a sub-auditory sound wave which would stop Anya from being able to use her telepathy. The idea behind this was to introduce another weakness for Anya: when this sound wave is emitted or detected, it interferes with the brain's natural telepathic frequency. This is because the sound wave oscillates at a frequency that masks the neural signals required for telepathy, and means that Anya can’t interpret those signals as easily. 

Thanks for reading!

I told you this was long. Sorry 😅

The above is really just a collective mishmash of stuff I’ve been slowly putting together for about the last 6 months, and I fully accept there will be parts that are more plausible than others. 😂 But it was fun, and more than anything I am really excited to see what we get to find out in Anya’s backstory arc (when it gets here…), and if I see any mentions of brains or neuroscience in SxF I will literally die of joy

[thewriteadviceforwriters]

Why Writing Is So Lonely | Rin T.

Hello writers, and anyone else who uses Tumblr on a daily basis like me. (Although I’ve been inactive off and on.) It’s me, Rin, and I wanted to talk about something that I think a lot of us struggle with. Or at least anyone, and everyone who considers themselves writers.

The loneliness that can come with the writing life and being a writer. We spend so much of our time alone. It doesn’t matter if you're using your laptop or scribbling in notebooks. Or pacing around in your living room and muttering dialogue to yourself (which I'm completely guilty of.)

Writing is really a solitary passion, and it hasn't just recently been like that. I'm sure Jane Austen and Edgar Allen Poe dealt with similar feelings. And sometimes that isolation can take a real toll that many of us choose to ignore, both on our creativity, our passion, which I assume is writing in this case, and our mental health.

I’ve been writing for about 4 years now, mostly working on my own little passion projects that I plan on publishing and side hustles, not only for my writing project but also my blog (TheWrite AdviceForWriters). I’m currently knee-deep in 4 different novel drafts that I’m absolutely in love with. However, let me tell you. It can get Very lonely a lot of times. There are days when I feel like I’m the only person in the world who cares about these made-up characters and their fictional problems. The characters I create in my mind are so vivid that they seem like the only individuals who actually care about my passion. (They technically are, considering they are basically my passion.)

It’s so easy to start wondering whether anyone will ever want to read the stories I'm pouring my heart into. The self-doubt I get has been a big part of my writing journey, and sometimes it breaks my heart knowing that I may not please everyone who reads my stories. That I possibly could get the worst reviews out there on my book. If it's not perfect for society. For example, I have been reading and receiving news on Alex Aster and the amount of bad reviews she received for her LightLark novel, and she has had a few times where she’s stated she poured her heart into it. And it's not just Aster who deals with these as a published author; there are many others, and it sometimes scares me.

But you know what? I've come to realize that this loneliness is just part of the writer’s journey. And that it truly is going to be the process of every writer’s journey and career. It’s going to be one of the prominent challenges we have to face if we want to do this crazy, wonderful, painful thing we call writing. And I think it's important we talk about it, especially since I'm a blogger who owns a blog specifically for writers. The biggest reason I chose to create this blog was for this reason and the many other challenges of being a writer. 

I definitely will consider this blog post to be a discussion, and if anyone wants to reblog or reply to this blog post and start a conversation, please do so, just so we can support each other and figure out healthy ways to cope.

So, why is writing such a lonely pursit? Well, there are quite a few reasons, especially reasons for each individual writer; however, here are a few key reasons:

The Act Itself is Solitary.

At the end of the day, writing is something we have to do on our own. Sure, we can brainstorm with other writers and friends who write or get feedback from beta readers. Or even develop  and edit your manuscript with a professional book editor. But the actual act of putting words on the page is a solo endeavor. We’re the ones doing the typing, the (physical) writing, and the constant racking of our brains to find the perfect word or phrase to put down on paper or the blank page on a screen.

Even when we’re writing collaboratively, there’s still a certain level of isolation involved. I mean, after all, our individual writing process and creative visions have to align for the collaboration to work.

And let’s be real—aligning those things isn't always easy.

I’ve reached out to book editors, more so of developmental editors, which is an editor who guides the writer/author on the actual plot and outline of the novel itself. And they have mentioned the difficulties of needing to align with the creativity of the topic or novel. It isn't easy at all.

I know that for me, my most productive writing sessions happen when I'm alone. And I know for a fact I'm not alone on that.

Having no distractions when it's just me, my thoughts, and the blinking cursor on the screen with a Spotify playlist playing in the background. And while that can be deeply fulfilling and very productive, I will admit it can be incredibly lonely.

It's an Emotionally Draining Process.

Writing isn't just about stringing words together. It's about pouring our hearts and souls onto the page. Were digging into our deepest emotions, our biggest fear, our wildest dreams, our thoughts, our philosophy, I can go on. And that kind of vulnerability can be utterly exhausting.

When I'm in the process of drafting a new novel or the many current projects I'm working on. I often find myself emotionally drained at the end of the day. I've been living and breathing these characters, feeling their joys and pains as my own. describing the actions, words, and emotions these characters do and feel. And then after that, I have to close my laptop, put my pen and notebook away, and try to reenter the “real world"—a world that doesn’t always understand the weight I've been carrying. 

It can be so isolating, feeling like the only person who understands the emotional journey of your writing. Knowing what it feels like to create characters and their stories and emotions and personalities just as if they were real humans. Our non-writer friends and family members try their best to be supportive, but unless they experience it firsthand, they cannot fully grasp the depth of what we go through. I can tell when I explain my projects to others who aren't writers, it can sometimes feel like they don't care about what I'm saying to them. Or it can also feel like, my stories are just a synopsis for an underrated movie no one’s ever watched.

It's a Profession of Rejection

I think we all know, writing is a tough gig. It's a tough career and job. Even the most successful authors have had to face their fair share of rejection. The rejections can be received from agents, publishers, readers, or critics. (like I mentioned earlier), and that constant stream of “no’s” can really chip away at our confidence and sense of self-worth. And especially if you're an aspiring author and have not yet published your work. Knowing that rejection is a big part of the career of writing is frightening. Really.

I remember when one of my best friends, who is a writer, who is currently in the process of publishing her book, would send query after query only to receive endless rejections. She told me it felt like the entire world was telling her, “Your writing isn't good enough,” and that can be a pretty lonely and demoralizing place to be. It has made me anxious about getting to the querying phase, as I still haven't begun to query yet.

Even when we start to find some success, the fear of rejection never really goes away. Will readers love our next book as much as the last one? Will readers even like my debut novel? Will the critics tear it apart? I know when I first started writing my first novel project. I rewrote the first chapter. 13 times!! And that’s because of all the questions and doubts I had in mind. It’s enough to make any writer want to crawl into a hole and never come out.

And the thing is, as writers, we often don't have the same support system that people in other professions might have. We don't have coworkers to commiserate with or a boss to reassure us; it’s just us. Our doubts and the eerie silence of an empty inbox. For example, Ana Neu, one of my all-time favorite Author-Tuber's, has dealt with similar struggles. She’s mentioned several times how lonely she feels and how her family doesn't fully understand her love and passion for writing. And I completely agree with her. If you want to listen to more of her, please listen to her podcast and watch her videos on YouTube here.

So, now that I went over the key reasons as to why writing is so lonely, I didn't want to end this post on negativity, that’s why I wanted to list the main strategies that have helped me:

Build a Writer’s Community

One of the best ways to combat the isolation of writing is to surround yourself with other writers. That’s why I found social media to be a gift, not just for the other obvious reasons, but because we get to find writers around the world who enjoy the same things we like. Having that sense of community can be a game changer.

When I first started my Tumblr blog, TheWriteAdviceForWriters, I was really hoping to create that kind of supportive space for writers. I wanted to create a space where anyone who enjoys writing—not just fiction writers, but anyone who finds writing to be a passion of theirs—can share their dreams and struggles with. It's been amazing to connect with so many incredible people who just “get” the unique challenges we face. Being able to share our achievements and share our compassions. It's been vital for my own mental health as a writer, and I hope that it can also be vital for all of you.

And of course, the community is not about venting or seeking validation from others; its about providing feedback, encouragement, and just being able to make friends. Having that makes the lonely parts of the writing process and journey feel a little less lonely.

Prioritize Self-care

It's so easy to get caught up in the work and neglect our well-being. There have been multiple times where I wouldn't take a break from my writing sessions and simply not eat and drink. I wouldn't give myself time to process everything I wrote, and I immediately after would criticize it.

However, I find that self-care is the most important part of combating the isolation that comes with being a writer. For me, that looks like making sure I get enough sleep. You can't process, learn, and remember anything when you don't have enough sleep. During my personal self-care, when I do 45-to 1-hour writing sessions, I usually take a short nap after. Eating nourishing meals and snacks is important, as is making time for the hobbies and activities that bring me joy. I usually like reading books, spending quality time with my family members, and very feisty (and sometimes scary) cat.

3. Cultivate Gratitude

When loneliness starts to creep in, it can be really helpful to shift our mindset and focus on what we are grateful for; this can be really productive and rewarding. Being a writer is a gift; we get to spend our days doing what we love, bringing our creative visions to life and sharing them with people who love literature. Readers are such a big part of being a writer, and they're huge motivations to me.

So, if you can, just take a moment to appreciate the joys of writing. For example, if you have any writing quirks, I personally have to wear bracelets on both of my wrists in order to produce some type of creativity when I write. I'm not sure why it's just something I noticed. I also really love writing my manuscripts physically. I tend to do this when I'm suffering from writer's block, and for some reason my writing style is a lot better.

And don't forget the many other joys of writing, like drafting, and the excitement of sharing your work with others. Having a new idea come to mind that fits perfectly in your plot. Or even a reader or beta reader sharing a comment on your work and giving you encouragement.

Also, please celebrate your wins; it makes writing all too fun, and it's a great way to integrate writing into the real world.

End Note

I wanted to write this post because I know a lot of us deal with feeling lonely; I’ve been feeling that way for quite some time, and I wanted to share it with Tumblr. I feel like each and every one of you all feel the same way. And that’s why I created my Tumblr community; that's the reason I created this blog, and that's the reason I strive to build this into an entire brand.

I want to bring more awareness to writers, we are the people behind the stories, movies, and media that we consume today, and we barely get any credit for our work. I want to make a brand where others who never thought writing to be their passion could actually for once consider “Is writing for me?”

I feel like it's such an underrated yet overrated passion. Yet it's not acknowledged as much. 

I hope this post can make you understand that writing is 90% lonely and you are not crazy for thinking so. But, we can use the resources we have today, like social media, to change that and make writing better for the present and the future. 

Thank you all for reading. And please, if you are considering joining a community if you haven't already, please join The Write Right Society. We recently met 100 members, and the community is continuing to grow.

[melodic-haze]

Could you maybe do nsfw hcs for Jinhsi?

☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Jinhsi x dom!Reader

☆ — TYPE: NSFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: bondage and use of toys

☆ — NOTES: it's 1 am and I should be sleeping bc I'm fucking off to London tomorrow early morning. Oh well LOL

☆ — PARTS: Part 1, Part 2 (you are here)

So we witnessed the part 1 right? Day mode Jinhsi content? If not and you came straight for this then you're FILTHY❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️ Jokes me too

Anyway she's as sweet in bed as she is in the streets my babyyy 🫶🫶🫶 AND she's also as strong and formidable too. Thoigh tbf cmon you're BASICALLY bedding royalty/royalty-adjacent 🤷‍♀️ like be real

As much as she holds power and authority in her duties with a balanced grip, soft and caring yet firm and watchful, she does like the feeling of letting it go. She isn't a workaholic despite the workload she acc has so she recognises just how nice it is to simply stop thinking. And she puts herself in your hands, so full of trust as if she wasn't superior to you. Though really, in the room you're in? You may as well be equals-- no, you may as well be the one superior to her

I think while she may seem like very vanilla, she's definitely looked into things once or twice to experiment and see what she likes and doesn't like, sort out her preferences and stuff yk. Don't think she's be open about it though, more of a 'need-to-know-but-you-have-to-ask' basis which nobody's ever been.....until you, DUH

Ohhhhh I see her as a toy enthusiast. She doesn't get them out often (and no FUCKING way would she display them or anything) but she does certainly have a collection. She buys them under different names, has trusted couriers deliver it without knowing what's inside and it would be a disgrace upon the Magistrate to take a peek❗️❗️❗️ and just keeps them in a hidden box with different compartments. I just KNOW she'd be extremely knowledgable on them though, like how you're able to use them to gain max pleasure and etc despite not actually using them a lot

I personally don't think she'd have much of a libido!! Might be bc of how swamp she basically is with work, both while she's clocked in AND clocked out, but she's just never had that constant want or need—that kind of thing is at the back of her mind, esp when she has an entire region to manage and protect as its Sentinel's blessed

When she does get the urge to do so though, especially when she's with you, oh it hits STRONG I fear. Maybe it's bc of how pent-up she may be (bc really sometimes toys get to the point where they jsut aren't enough), or maybe it's bc of her being closely linked to said Sentinel ☺️☺️☺️

By THIS I mean with the whole sharing powers thing, there's no way some of its draconic traits haven't affected her in a certain way. SHE SPROUTS HORNS FOR GOD'S SAKE

Maybe that was mean of you, leaving her all alone for a little while in the dark while the vibrator inside her pussy operated as it should.

Really, you were just having way too much fun with her collection and you just wanted ti grab a few more.. at least, before you got distracted with one thing or another.

Now that you're back, though, you can't say you regret being distracted; the overall look that you lover was currently sporting, all bound and oh so wet as flickers of the power you both fear and respect make themselves known by having her—or rather, Jue's—horns manifest on her head from the overwhelming feeling of wanting to let go. But she can't, not when you've yet to give her the command to do so.

"For a leader, you obey me so easily, even when I'm not even there," you notice. "This whole time, you're just really eager to please, aren't you, dear Magistrate?"

Of course she couldn't answer verbally, you hadn't told her to speak, but she nods her head desperately as she trembled and that was good enough for you.

You see her eyes tracking you as you came closer, her irises quite literally glowing a celestial gold from the need of release. The closer you got, the more you see her struggling with her bonds to reach you... And failing miserably, much to her credit considering how you knew she could tear through them if she really wanted.

When you finally, finally get close enough, your hand goes over the dildo vibrator inside her, yet you don't grip it. Instead, you simply graze your hand on the toy's handle, perhaps even knocking it slightly sideways for a little extra motion, to which she lurched so delightfully—unbefitting of a government official like her, of course, but certainly befitting for your beloved in the bedroom.

"Do you want to cum, babe?"

She nods.

"How badly do you want to cum?"

No answer.

"Speak."

And all at once, her thoughts burst forth, the blatancy still unfamiliar to you to this day yet it still isn't any less satisfying to experience such a strong, independent soul to fall like this.

"I-- I need you so very badly, please..! I can't.. I don't-- I don' think I can h-hold it any longer--"

"Bold of you to decide what your limits are by yourself." You raised your eyebrow, "You wanted me to take the lead, the least you could do is—" and you turn the vibrator off, "—follow it. Stop thinking, there is no place for you to do so here."

All she lets out is a desperate whimper—she doesn't dare to upset you any further.

..And that has you turning it back on again, though you put it at a relatively low setting for her, keeping in mind that her draconic-esque endurance would need more than the average to break your beloved completely, as per her request.

She wanted true bliss, right? She wanted you to ravage her completely and take control of her in the way nobody else has managed or dared to?

If Jinhsi wanted it all, then she had to let herself go completely first.

Anyway ab her horns, touching the base of them would set her the FUCK off 🥰🥰 no, not the horn itself. Apologies have to be made right here right now but I believe in horn technicality which means horn sensitivity is not a thing, ESPECIALLY when it's her type which only really appear when she's channelling her abilities. The ROOT of it however would be a different matter, so massaging her head would basically K.O. her self-restraint

But that's fine, you'll make sure it happens.. no matter how long it'd take and how loud she ends up becoming.

Along with that, she probably has INSANE durability and stamina let's be so real. Each time you do anything remotely harsh on her, her tacet mark flickers for a brief second and it's like you're simultaneously striking soft skin and scales at the same time. She can ALSO go for a VERY long time, so edging her? Is REALLY fun when you wanna test exactly how much shr can take befkre she breaks and starts begging for you to help her get off 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[miyuhpapayuh]

back at the office.

“Well, at least you two are on a first name basis, now. Improvement!” Mercedes pokes Mya in her side. She swats at her friend’s hand in feigned annoyance.

The pair are seated on a park bench across from the office, munching on fruit before they have to clock in for the day.

“Girl, gon’ somewhere,” she says with a laugh, “We work together and that’s about it. He’s probably not even from here!” The aloof tone of her voice betrays her actual feelings.

“Ma’am, that accent is thicker than chunky peanut butter out the freezer. Of course he’s from here. Or at least near here! Plus, I seen him at the poetry spot downtown, he could be pretty decent,” she says casually, while chomping on a chunk of watermelon.

“And just what the hell are you doing at a poetry spot? Last book you read had a big cat on the front,” Mya jabs at her friend.

“First of all, fuck you,” she’s interrupted by Mya’s snort of a laugh. “Second of all, didn’t I tell you? I met my new boo down there,” she finishes with a shimmy of the shoulders.

“How many felonies does this one have?”

“I’m gonna let that one go ‘cause I’m in a good mood. And if you quit being a punk, you can snag yourself a man, too.”

“I’m not a punk. I’m just not in the market for a man right now.” She shrugs as Mercedes rolls her eyes.

“Chile, a lie don’t care who tell it. Ray Charles can see you want his ass.”

Mya can’t contain the burst of laughter that leaves her lips.

“Why would you say that??”

“I'm just sayin’!” Mercedes continues through her own laughter.

“I’m not ‘bout to play with you today,” she dabs the tears that formed at the corners of her eyes. Glancing at her phone, she notices she’s dangerously close to being late.

“Oh shit,” she pops up from her seat grabbing her things, “Savannah’ll have our heads if we're late again.”

“Please, Savannah loves us. She’ll fire that shiftless ass Colin before she fires you,” Mercedes responds as she gathers her things at a more leisurely pace.

“Either way it goes, I’m not tryna make a habit outta being late.” She says, as they make their way inside.

“Nice of y'all to join us,” none other than Savannah herself greets them both just as they punch their timecard in the lounge.

“Hey auntie!” Mercedes cheeses, before heading out.

“So, what lil’ boy done caught your attention and got you showing up late now?” Her boss teases.

It never fails to surprise her how nothing gets past her boss, not that he was the reason for her tardiness.

“Nobody. Only thing that has my attention is work,” she lies casually, trying to breeze by her and back towards the lobby.

“Hmm. You sure it’s not that handsome young tender with the strong arms that’s always breakin’ his neck to catch a glimpse at you?”

Her ears perk up at the new piece of information, and she deftly pivots on her heels.

“He does?” she responds a little too earnestly for her own liking. Clearing an imaginary blockage from her throat, she adjusts her tone.

“He does?” She repeats, cooler this time, as she tucks a freshly straightened, cherry red tendril of hair behind her ear, a nervous tick.

“Mhm.” The all-knowing smirk on her boss’ full lips makes Mya’s cheeks redden even further.

“All the time. I’m surprised he hasn’t asked you out yet. Must be shy like you. Lord knows if I wasn’t married and old enough to be his mama…” she trails off.

As if her poor cheeks couldn’t get any rosier.

“Alright! I’m gonna start workin’ now.” She starts to back her way out of the hall toward the printer room to save herself further embarrassment.

“Hey! You're coding, for the next hour. Grab the big stack of card stock from the back to refresh your signs, before you get started.”

Grabbing her tools for the day, she heads to the big printer in the middle room, closing the door behind her.

She’d taken it upon herself to color code the system, helping everyone navigate through it just a little easier, as well as replacing the faded, white company signs with brighter, more colorful ones.

Pulling up her stool, she gets started.

A knock sounds at the door, before Isaiah steps inside, heading towards the supply closet.

“Mornin’, didn’t mean to interrupt,” coming out with a stack of copy paper in hand, he looks up to see the pretty brown girl with bright red hair that’s had mind jumbled for the last few weeks or so.

She looks up from the screen and smiles. “Mornin’,” she responds, “I’m knee-deep in this screen, I didn’t even hear you come in.”

“S’alright. Just came to refill the printer.” He replies, gesturing towards the big contraption she was currently sitting in front of.

“Oh! Let me move out of the way, sorry.” He chuckles, watching her grab her laptop and work on her feet, before he moves in to refill the tray.

“It’s alright. What you workin’ on, today?” He asks, printing a few documents.

“Coding the system to make it easier for everybody. Then, I’ve gotta redo the signs, out front. Savannah’s finally letting me loose in here.” She giggles, typing away on her keyboard with one hand.

Gathering his paper, he moves out of her way. “Sounds like a project. Can I see?”

“Sure!” She sits her laptop down and shows him the screen as she types away.

“Our plans are in green, projects are in pink and tasks are in blue, now. Holidays are highlighted, as well employee birthdays. Ooh! I really loved doing that, because I get to choose different colors for that, as well.”

He hums a laugh. “This your avenue, yeah? Projects?”

“Projects can be fun,” she turns toward him. “Imagine if she let you use photoshop on the ads that you create? It would take them to the next level!”

“You’ve seen one of the ads I’ve done in photoshop?” He asks.

“Mhm. It was up on the main computer, the other day. I didn’t know it was yours, until I saw the little eye you placed in the corner.”

“Yeah,” he laughs. “It’s like my watermark, for now.”

“It’s cute. But, your ad was nice!”

“I appreciate that. Especially, coming from you.” She blushes, as he heads toward the door.

“See you later?” He asks, hope burning behind his brown eyes.

“See you later.” She nods, mirroring his smile, before they get back to work.

About an hour and a half later, all ten of her fingers are cramped to hell and her back is killing her, but she’s finally finished with her project.

Closing the door behind her, she sighs and heads towards her own office, bumping into Savannah.

“Oh, Mya! The system is running so smooth, now! And the signs look wonderful!” She praises.

“Thank you! I’m always happy to help!”

“So am I.” She smiles.

“What do you mean?”

“I may have put a bug in someone’s ear about someone.. you can thank me, later, sweetheart.”

“A…what? Savannah, what are you talking about?”

“Your secret admirer is about to become not so secret, anymore.”

Her heart begins to beat triple time.

“Oh, God… I think I’m having a stroke.”

“Oh,” Savannah starts laughing. “You are too much, girl! Just relax! I know he’s pretty, but he’s a sweet man who’s sweet on you!”

Isaiah conveniently walks down the hall, his sight set out for Mya.

His eyes light up as he spots her talking to their boss.

“Afternoon, ladies.” He greets. “Can I steal Mya away?”

“As long as you give her back,” Savannah pats his shoulder, before heading back down the hall.

“Hey,” she waves, that intoxicating cologne of his hitting her nose.

“Hey,” he smiles, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “I was kinda hoping that you would join me for lunch.. that is, if you didn’t already have anything planned, of course.”

The corners of her mouth lift into a smile. “Well, seeing as we like the same kind of food, I would love to join you for lunch. Let me just grab my wallet.”

She moves for her office door, until he speaks, again. “I was actually hoping that I could buy your lunch, as well.”

“You’re doin’ a lot of hoping, today.” The smile never leaves her lips.

“Looks like I’m doing a whole lot scorin’ today, too.” He humbly brags.

“Does this work for you, often?”

“I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve tried.” He laughs.

They share a laugh. “Lead the way.”

☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.☆:☆: .☽ .☆: .☽ · 。ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆

“So, where exactly are you from?” Mya asks, biting into her sandwich.

The pair had decided to head over to Panera for a quick lunch.

“I’m from Texas. Dallas, to be exact.” He replies.

“Ah. I told my friend that you weren’t from here, I knew it!” She giggles.

“How’d you tell?”

“Well, no offense… but, your accent is rather thick. They don’t really sound like that, down here, too fast.”

His smile takes over his entire face at her comment. “None taken. I’ve gotten that, a lot. I like the accents out here, though.”

“Well, at least y’all sound like you come from somewhere.” She rolls her eyes.

“What do you mean? You’re from here, ain’t you?”

“Yeah, but I don’t sound like it.” She frowns.

“Yes you do,” he snorts. “You got a lil twang.”

“You’re only sayin’ that.”

“Honest,” he holds his hands up. “You do. It’s subtle, but it’s there.” He assures.

“Really?” Her brows raise. He nods.

“Mhm. Don’t trip, pretty.” He says, popping a chip in his mouth. She blushes.

Catching the three minute warning on her phone, she begins to gather her trash.

“Almost time to head back?” He eyes her movement, reluctantly doing the same.

“Yeah,” she sighs, “rest of the day’s filled with paperwork.”

“Well, we can’t all be God’s favorite and color code the system in the mornings.” She laughs at the crack he takes at her.

“It’s not just about making it pretty, mister big  arms.” She playfully rolls her eyes.

“My broadness distractin’ you, little lady?” He asks, amusement coloring his tone.

Yes. God, yes.

“We should head back.” She stands up from the table to toss her trash. His eyes travel to her derrière.

“Mm.” He remarks to himself, standing from the table to throw his own trash away, before they head back to the office.

Making plans to catch back up once the day was finally over, Mya sinks down in her chair.

Her phone begins to ring.

“Hey, mama,” she answers, turning her laptop back on.

“Hey, baby. You alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just ready for the workday to end. It started pretty great, though.”

“Yeah? What’s going up at Vannah’s that’s got you in the good spirits, besides the angel, herself?” Her mother speaks fondly of her beloved boss.

“She’s finally taken me up on my offer to brighten up the place!,” she cheeses like her mother could see her face. “I started color coding the system to make everything easier to navigate, because it was starting to give me a migraine! Nothing on this earth should ever be that dull.”

Her mother laughs. “You are something else. But, that’s amazing, sweetheart. I always knew you’d be able to showcase your talents.”

“Thanks for always believing in me.”

“Always. Now, who’s this boy that Mercedes was goin’ on about?”

Sighing aloud, she sits up in her chair. “I gotta call you back. We’ll talk about it later, I promise.”

“Is she in trouble?”

“She’s about to be. Love you.”

“Love you too, baby. Bye bye.”

Hanging up, she quickly facetimes Mercedes. “Look, I know you and my mama are cool and all, but why would you tell her about Isaiah?”

“Girl, I honestly just told her that you got a crush on somebody, like you always do! And she was like “is he cute?” And I was like “do you know your daughter? The men are always fine!” And she laughed and that was that.” She shrugs.

“You two are gonna give me grey hair.” Mya shakes her head, beginning to type away at her keyboard.

“Now, I know you FaceTimed me to spill somethin’, so please get on with it.” Mercedes laughs. Her infectious laughter grows as Mya turns her attention back to her best friend.

“Ooh, I knew it!”

“Cedes, be quiet,” Mya giggles,” he asked me to join him for lunch and offered to pay for it! So, we went to Panera and talked. He’s from Texas, by the way.” Mercedes’ mouth falls open.

“I was wrong??”

“You were! I told you, too!” She whisper yells. “He’s from the south, but it ain’t here.”

“Well, I’ll be damned. So, you got you a Dallas cowboy, then, huh?” She says, the look on her face makes Mya wanna hang up on her.

“I really don’t like you.” She tries to hold back the smirk.

“It’s okay! Cause, I really love you!” She cheeses. “And, that’s cute, seriously. He bought you lunch and made you fall in love!”

“I’m not in love!” She laughs.

“What was in that sandwich? Bacon?”

“Mercedes.” Mya calls, it falls on deaf ears.

“That bacon must’ve been extra crispy.”

“It was. Goodbye.”

“Ride ‘em, cowgirl!”  She quickly hangs up, shaking her head.

“That girl is a mess.”

Grabbing her keys, she locks her office door behind herself and heads towards the front of the building to wait for Isaiah, like they’d planned.

“Yeah, she’s great.” He smiles, telling his friend and coworker, Jane, about Mya.

“I knew you two would hit it off. She’s been eyeing you for a while.”

“Well, she wasn’t alone.”

“Don’t I know it. You’ve talked my head about her for months, Isaiah.” She laughs, patting his shoulder.

“That’s what friends are for, right? Don’t I listen to you when you go on and on about uh, whatever his name is, this week?”

She rolls her eyes. “Tell your girlfriend to enjoy you, cause I’ll be killing you, soon.”

He laughs. “Don’t be me like that, Jane Doe. I’ll catch up with you later.” They hug and part ways.

He finds Mya with her head in her phone. He walks over, her eyes locking with his as he approaches her.

“Hey, pretty.” He greets, enjoying the view of her reddened cheeks as she twists her lips up.

“Hey, handsome.”

“Can I walk you to your car?” He offers.

“Sure.” She accepts, allowing him to lead the way, opening the door for her. She mentally checks manners off her list.

“Thank you, Isaiah.” She unlocks the driver side door.

“You’re more than welcome. Before I let you go, I’d like to ask you somethin’.”

She leans against the car door. “What’s up?”

“I been meanin’ to ask you, if you’d like to accompany me to this new spot, Friday?”

Completely taken aback that he was actually asking her out, her immediate yes jumped out, before she could contain herself. Their smiles are identical.

“I would love to. What kind of spot are we talkin’?”

“S’called Tropic. You know, one of those clubs with the disco lights, like we’re still in nineteen seventy-five and the drinks got them tiny umbrellas in ‘em.” He chuckles, rambling on as she dazedly stares at him.

“Sounds like fun.” She cheeses.

“It’s a date, then," grabbing her hand into his own, he softly caresses her skin. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“Me, too.” Her voice came out smaller than she liked. He doesn’t tease her about it. Kissing the back of her hand, he releases her. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” She nods.

Waving goodbye, he heads to his own car, leaving her to slide inside of her own and squeal.

“A date?!”

[pomefioredove]

i was wondering if you could do Duece, Leona, Ruggie, Azul, Jamil x Christian S/O headcanons? like reader used to be a preacher back at their world, and still kinda preaches in twst (i think rollo believes in God?) like they do all the things Christians should do but still kinda chaotic? their very respectfull and kind yk? sorry for making this a bit long and confusing lol

twst's relationship with religion is so vague and complicated and yet. I cannot imagine rollo as anything BUT catholic. look at that guy. so I believe there's some kind of similar belief systems happening there

summary: religious reader type of post: headcanons characters: deuce, leona, ruggie, azul, jamil additional info: platonic or romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader yuu, short and not proofread author's note: writing these on the basis that religion does exist in twisted wonderland and parallels religions of our own. I am catholic and admittedly unfamiliar with preaching to others, I think that's more of a protestant thing, so I kinda just winged that part?

𝐃𝐞𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐝𝐞

if there's anything for him to admire, it's your dedication

I mean, you're sticking to your beliefs and passions in an entirely different universe

with a bunch of strangers, no less!

whether or not some version of your beliefs exist here, you're committed! and quite knowledgeable, too

it's pretty impressive to him

Deuce's family doesn't seem particularly religious, though he probably just enjoys hearing the stories

the narratives of change and redemption catch his eye

𝐑𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐞 𝐁𝐮𝐜𝐜𝐡𝐢

he's big into all those "it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God" verses

even if he doesn't necessarily believe in all that heaven stuff... it's a little funny

(he might use that one in the future, actually...)

if religion which parallels our own does exist in Twisted Wonderland, I can imagine his granny being religious

she seems like someone who'd cover the walls in symbols and art

maybe (likely) not Christian in origin, but enough for him to recognize that what you're going on about is a similar deal

he's practically used to it already

𝐋𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐫

literally just falls asleep while you're talking

it's not that he doesn't care, it's just that...

wait, no. he doesn't care

sure, he participates in traditions and such with his family, but that's more for looks

Leona doesn't really see the point in blindly following something that hasn't helped him out at all

and hearing about miracles and blessings just annoys him

but, hey! you make for a great sound machine

these are basically all just bedtime stories for him to doze off to, anyway

𝐀𝐳𝐮𝐥 𝐀𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨

merman religion is... tricky, to me

the existence of Hades in implies (confirms, even, if we take into account Yuu's dreams) the existence of Poseidon

but, like King Triton, these figures aren't necessarily worshipped. they're depicted as monarchs, not gods

but, then again, our knowledge on Coral Sea culture is limited

in any case, Azul might tolerate preaching

he really sees no use for it, and he's a busy man, but he doesn't really mind the company

if anyone, it's Jade who would be really interested in hearing alllll about these human stories

Floyd might tag along, too

and, suddenly, Azul finds himself wedged between the tweel's shoulders on the floor while they eagerly listen to you

...there goes his afternoon

𝐉𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥 𝐕𝐢𝐩𝐞𝐫

to me, Jamil is not religious or superstitious by any means

he doesn't mind listening, but don't expect him to change his mind about any of that

(especially while Kalim is begging for more stories)

though, even he admits that having you around is as refreshing as it is entertaining

you're just always so... hopeful

and it's much different from Kalim's version of optimism (in his eyes, at least) simply because, in this world, you're at the same disadvantage as Jamil is

your autonomy is constantly in question, you're living at the mere goodwill of others...

and yet, you're hopeful!

it's strange, but Jamil can't help but crave that presence in his life

[newkatzkafe2023]

@lara-legomonkiekid

What if the monkey Y/N Behave like Gudetama.

Female Monkey Lazy Egg (Y/N)

(Lmk Wukong) You guys are the lazy couple. Just loves how chill you are. When first met you, he was Wild and all over the place. But settle down as the years go by, and you kinda helped him with that too. He and others were shocked at how you were surprisingly good at giving advice. Especially to Mk The manifestation of anxiety and trauma and Red Son The Personification of expectations made to never be reached. The two had once stopped fighting because you told them that you were trying to take a nap and they were being too loud. Wukong Love's lazy days with you. Because all you two get to do was sleep, eat, and sleep some more. He loves to listen to your soft. Exhausted voice as you tell him, the daily advice and most at the time You always tell him to go with the flow. On a side note, you also get along with Macaque, but of course, nobody knows that.

(NR Wukong) You are the only one who is able to get him, to chill out at least 5 minutes. Li and Su minds were blown because one moment He was bouncing off the walls. Then, all you had to do was call him down to the couch. And then he was laying next to you and didn't move a muscle. The two will never know how you're able to do it because they can't get them to sit down to save their lives. Your husband loves how laid back you are and at leaves him open to getting kisses and cuddles from you. Not that you mind you love how warm he is and how silly he can be. But it's not easy being married to him. And his never-ending energy despite his age. But like you always told him, you always go with the flow, and everything turns out okay in the end.

(HIB Wukong) You guys are like a good match. Their is never a time when you guys aren't chilling somewhere and a quiet grass field. But ever since you talked in Liuer and Silly Girl, your lives have been more Eventful than unusual. Wukong was always running around protecting Liuer, and Silly girl would stick to u like glue. You were pretty sure she thought you were her mother. You didn't care too much, but they were both certainly a handful, but you're able to get the two under control better than he can. But overall, Wukong and the children wouldn't trade you for the heavens. Maybe they can go with the flow like you can.

(MK Reborn Wukong) Your personality causes you to bump heads with Master tang on a daily basis. You hate how he pushes his Buddhist philosophy on to you and your husband. You even straight up told the monk that you guys have been married before Wukong met him, and there ain't a damn thing he can do about it. You're often hanging off your husband's back because you get tired of walking, which he doesn't mind because he likes to be close to you. Although the month didn't like how unmotivated and gloomy. You actually were, but in reality, well, you're just real. The first thing you told your husband when you first met was why when you let somebody else tell you what you worth. It was like he was shot down by Cupid's arrow that day. He definitely likes to cuddle and take naps with you and listen to your tired voice. Talk about your day even though he was right there with you. The main point is you taught him how to go with the flow and just relax. It's gonna be so fun for him to take back to flower fruit mountain.

(Netflix Wukong) He relies on you for so much. More than you can ever comprehend, He never knows how you could just let things wash over you without a problem. How you're always chill and you never let things get to you. Do you really want to know your secret. You even taught him that no matter how hard he tries to show he's got control , he really doesn't. He asked to go with the flow and that sometimes everything turns out the way it should be. He has a lot to learn, and he's glad that he has you to learn it with and from. Also, cuddles and kisses with you are the best thing. Peaches, and he hopes to always have you around him forever.

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG

[powerpuffobsession]

Charlie, a princess who grew up in hell and mind you wanders around its streets freely, strikes me not as a naiive

But more as uncaring. No naiive person could be that reckless and ignore signs of when they should apply more effort to help their loved ones. Especially the one who should have long ago learned how the world around her works (she's 200)

let's count:

Takes as granted that Vaggie sees successfully helping Charlie as the only basis of her self esteem and personality (treating her gf more like a servant, an unfortunate consequence of Vaggie being nerfed as a character in general). Plus, Charlie dumps the responsibility of leading trust exercise on Vaggie without warning, making her feel anxious (who does that?)

Goes to Valentino's studio to "help Angel" just for brownie points. Doesn't think through an actual plan, actually thinks that Valentino would be okay with that and not abuse Angel more after he gets angry with Charlie (girl you grew up in hell), runs away crying from a bruised ego when something goes wrong instead of staying there and fixing her mistakes

Just stands there smiling when Alastor is shitting on her dad and outright lying about how he (Alastor) was supporting the hotel project since day 1 (when it was Vaggie actually...). Charlie doesnt correct him, she doesn't shut him up. She just..listens and awes. Girl, you aren't even in love with Alastor in canon. So why? My only guess is that Charlie doesn't even want to admit that someone she picked for help can act wrong and just suppresses the truth

Instead of being more mindful in the angel court, she blurts outloud how she doesnt trust angels (bad move that in real life distances someone you're trying to persuade, from you), and overall acts disrespectfully and aggressivelly (I doubt that in season 2 she's gonna be said to have learned from that mistake)

She only cares about sinners, as an object of her wonder, ignoring those who didn't have a choice of ending up in hell - imps

All in all: it even seems like Charlie's hotel wasn't organized to actually help sinners but to stroke her ego and help her get friends. We don't see Charlie putting any effort into understanding the psychology of human sinners, doing any research or at least hiring an actual shrink or other experts

Sinners at her hotel help each other out through befriending each other just because the writers want them to (seriously, try naming actual character traits that realistically intersect and provide believable chemistry). They could have easily done that without the hotel.

So what's the difference, and why does Lucifer pamper his daughter in the finale by saying that it was her who "changed their minds and touched their hearts"? (Given that he himself changed his mind after just one song that had no buildup to it lol - what a challenge that was indeed)

[zahri-melitor]

The thing that actually most frustrates me about Damian's pets is not only that it's turned into a gratuitous menagerie that only show up en masse because it's now turned into 'Damian likes animals, give him another pet' without considering how many he already has, but that the basis of a good story already existed before we ended up where we are today.

The problem is that we wouldn't be in the situation we are today with them if not for Grant Morrison.

Because look, if you read Batman and Robin 2011 on its own, Tomasi and Gleason do a solid job of using Titus as a route to demonstrate Damian's growing responsibility and ability to show affection and connect with Bruce. Titus is explicitly framed as a responsibility, as 'a boy and his dog', and one dog around the Wayne household is pretty common (usually an Ace). It's the opening steps to more story about Damian trusting others.

If Damian loved animals and stopped to play with kittens in alleys and just had Titus at home, we wouldn't be in this situation.

Bat-Cow, and honestly Alfred the Cat, are what caused the problem.

Bat-Cow as a concept is inherent Silver Age ridiculousness (what a surprise from Morrison), but also Damian saving a milking cow who is being sent to an abattoir is far more of a demonstration of what we end up getting, which is what looks like a possessive level of hoarding. Damian not only saves the cow, but wants it installed in the Cave, even though that is a terrible environment to keep a cow in, and there's very little point in having a cow living on the Wayne property. And what annoys me more is that nobody will let the cow just quietly disappear off panel never to reappear again (she's at least now been on a 'farm' since Joker War and Bruce losing Wayne Manor).

Alfred the Cat irritates me in that he's just a duplicate story to Titus, only done with less effort and entirely because Grant Morrison never reads anyone else's work AND Morrison wanted to give Damian a pet to humanise him right before killing him off. Alfred is a narrative device and annoys me because a good editor would have had Morrison just use Titus instead, who could have hit very similar beats, rather than Damian acquiring three separate pets in just over a year of comics, right before dying (and as far as Morrison was concerned, dying permanently). A pet is for life, not just a reward because you're getting killed.

And from there on, it's just turned into 'oh Damian likes animals!' so we get Goliath and Jerry the Turkey (who I believe recently emigrated to main canon in the last few years rather than being in Lil Gotham). And the story doesn't know what to do with so many animals, so they disappear entirely aside from occasional art cameos, Super-Pets stories, and about one story beat ever 3-5 years. He's endlessly going through the story of 'why' he acquired a pet to humanise him, rather than being humanised by playing with a long term pet.

There's also a narrative problem where we never actually ever see Damian caring for his animals (outside of Titus and occasionally Alfred the Cat), but what scenes we do get of people looking after the animals are all scenes of Alfred and Bruce checking in on them because Damian's not available. So while the dialogue in those scenes tends to be 'oh Damian would normally be doing this but'... we don't see Damian doing it. We only see Alfred and Bruce doing it. Or Maya, who's looking after Goliath. And given how often Damian runs off to find himself on an island, a lot of that pet care over the years has been from Alfred and Bruce, because he's not been living at home.

And yes, there's also the issue that Damian And His Pets is rather similar to the self-centred position Damian has on his various clones. He considers his clones his brothers; but the narrative is frequently setting that up in a manner that suggests this is grace that Damian especially extends to them because they are his clones. It's not really grappling with the concepts of extending that care and humanism to people or animals that are not 'his'.

It's just endlessly frustrating to me, because if Damian just had Titus, I think both Titus would appear on panel more often (and thus have more narrative use), and there would be the potential to build further plots out from Titus, if writers wanted to explore the themes around what pet ownership can demonstrate.

[steddieas-shegoes]

Hello ❤️ I know you’re back home and I think are doing these on an as-you-can basis. If you’re just completely done, let me know! But I got in my feelings today about always being the third wheel and of course my brain wants to whump Steve about it, so here’s two lines from a conversation I had with a friend:

“When do I stop being a last resort?”

And

“When will I get people who care the way I care?”

Again, if you’re not doing these any more, that’s completely fine! Just thought I’d submit these in case you are. Feel free to use one or the other, or both! ❤️

Hello my star ✨ I am technically not doing them, but it kinda sounds like we both maybe need this one and I'm gonna use this a lowkey plug for everyone to consider participating in the @steddiemicrofic challenge. I'm going with the first one because I believe that even at Steve's lowest, he knows he has Robin to care about him a whole lot ❤️

----------

When the dust settles, when everyone seems to find a new rhythm, when they don't always look over their shoulder and wait for the next world-ending crisis, Steve finds himself alone a lot.

When Robin leaves for college, he finds himself alone most of the time.

The kids are back in school, everyone except Jonathan and Eddie have gone off to college, and those two seem to get along just fine without Steve inserting himself into their friendship.

They still come hang out with him sometimes, usually when they wanna rent a movie using his discount, or if Eddie wants to borrow his dining room for Hellfire.

The worst part is he says yes, puts a smile on his face, pretends he's happy just to get some attention, any attention.

And he is a little happy. Some attention is better than none, especially for a lonely person like him.

He watched everyone around him have each other, while he has himself.

He talks to Robin every other night, but he feels like he's burdening her, but would never say that. He just waits for her to stop answering the calls.

It all comes to a head one evening when Eddie is over at his house late, still cleaning up after Hellfire.

Steve had a bad week at work, customers just being rude over nothing, a migraine two days in a row, and now Eddie dragging his feet to leave.

The worst part? He didn't want him to leave.

Just the thought of another night alone had him tearing up.

He made sure to stay facing away from Eddie, unable to stop the tears from falling, but at least able to stay quiet.

Not quiet enough.

"Steve? What's wrong?"

He sounded so concerned.

"Nothing. Just a little overtired. Head still hurts a little. You know how it is."

He couldn't quite laugh it off, the sound more of a choked sob than anything.

Eddie's hands were on his shoulders, turning him around so he had no choice but to look at him, his worried gaze more than Steve expected.

"What's actually wrong?"

So much.

"When do I stop being a last resort?"

He hadn't meant to say that. He certainly didn't expect Eddie's reaction: pulling him close to his chest, his grip on his back and hair enough to make Steve sink into it.

He hadn't been hugged since Robin left for college.

"What do you mean? You're not a last resort."

"I'm no one's first choice. You only come here because I have the most room. The kids only ever call if they need a ride somewhere. I think at this point Robin only talks to me so she knows I'm alive."

The words were hard to get out but he did it. He felt slightly better just knowing he'd said them.

"Fuck. We've- I've been so stupid."

Steve pulled away.

"I just thought you wanted your space. We're done fighting monsters, so you can go back to just being Steve Harrington. I don't think any of us thought you still wanted to be around us. But we've taken what we thought we could get."

"What? Why would anyone think that?"

"Because you only got involved in all this protect people. Now you don't have to."

"I protected everyone because I cared. Why would I just stop caring?"

"When you put it like that, it sounds stupid."

Steve rolled his eyes.

"Because it is stupid."

"So you do want us around?"

"Yes! I thought no one wanted me around anymore since they didn't need me."

Eddie shook his head, disappointment settling over him.

"That's so far from the truth. Dustin was upset the other day because he was convinced you were going to start telling him no when he asked for rides and he didn't know how else to see you."

Steve let it sink in, the words and the way Eddie still hadn't let go of him completely, still had his hands resting on his lower back as Steve looked up at him.

"For a smart kid, he sure is dumb."

Eddie laughed loudly, smiling down at Steve as some of the tension released from his body.

"I guess we all are."

"Including me."

"You're very loved, Steve. By all of us."

"All of you?"

"Yes. All."

[ratgrinders]

So I read this interview of Brennan Lee Mulligan post-Junior Year (really interesting btw, I recommend everyone check it out!!!!) but I wanted to talk about a couple questions that interested me in it regarding the Rat Grinders:

I love the Rat Grinders and how they're just this dichotomy...Talk to me about leaning into not just that they are the opposite of The Bad Kids, but their corruption, because they were really sweet as the High-Five Heroes before they followed Kipperlilly down this path. Brennan Lee Mulligan: There's an interesting question there. I think that for a lot of it, there were hints, and most of the things we've seen of their sweetness are contextual from bits of writing, little things, investigations. But I think that you can see… It's both. There are elements that they were not always like they are now, but the seeds of what they are now are there in the past. I think that when you look at the High-Five and then eventually becoming the Rat Grinders. There's an indication there of Kipperlilly's focus because yeah, the High-Five Heroes is sweet, but it's also sort of a indication that Kipperlilly is pushing them towards, for lack of a better word, do we have something that we're about? The Bad Kids get their name because they've all been given detention on the first day and it's connected to their story. Whereas you get the sense from the High-Five Heroes that it's not actually describing anything. It's like the person being like, "Our inside joke is going to be high-fives." And you're like, "Well, everyone high-fives." So there's an indication there, for me at least, that Kipperlily is trying to make a comradery right away that is not actually there. It's not based in something that happened to them.

So a confirmation that Kipperlilly naming them all the "High-Five Heroes" on the first day is her trying to "force" a sense of comradery, and also possibly an adventuring identity? Like how the Bad Kids already have this strong group cohesion and "story" because they were all given detention on the first day of classes, and Kipperlilly's trying to create something like that without it having a strong basis.

This seems indicative of a couple things to me, like Kipperlilly having a naturally strong, pushy personality that maybe overrides her other group members, or that she has a certain idea in her head about what makes an adventurer. She wants all the gimmicky stuff like a cool party name and inside jokes, but even then on the first day is trying to force it without having earned it. She's enamored with the idea of an adventurer in terms of them being the hero of their own story, and in her head how good of a "story" you have is directly linked to how good of an adventurer you are.

It also makes her opposing the name "Rat Grinders" later interesting, lol. Rat Grinders is obviously WAY more based in something unique to their party and an inside joke on what they actually do. Maybe it was just because she didn't appreciate her sense of control and her name being undermined.

How do you think they're going to diverge now that they don't have Kipperlilly leading them? Brennan Lee Mulligan: I think that the future of that group is very… I think I leave it to the players, but as you're saying with Kipperlilly, her leadership of that group to me, the moment that is the fundamental, very critical to the season and understanding it I think, is that killing of Lucy Frostblade. Where that is the moment where power and the opportunity for power is chosen over all else. The participation of everybody in that, that the other Rat Grinders came in and that they killed Lucy Frostblade, is the ultimate like, "Oh, we can understand wanting to have the status that The Bad Kids have. This was not worth that. It is not acceptable. Even if you really want to have something, you can't kill an innocent person who is also your best friend to get it. That is evil." And so I think that that's really the turning point for them.

And talking about Lucy being her best friend, and the killing of Lucy Frostblade as the point of no return. I imagine that after killing Lucy the Rat Grinders were deep in the sunk-cost fallacy, that "oh, we've just done this horrible thing, there's no turning back now". Like the text messages the Bad Kids found in Ruben's house.

Canon leaves it slightly unclear the order in which the Rat Grinders were shatter-starred, and just how culpable they are for their actions while under their influence. I'm going to assume that Kipperlilly was the first one, "willingly" taking one (for a given definition of "willingly", as I'd argue she had still be subjected to a year and a half of manipulation and grooming by Porter. She may have been sound of mind, but she never would've done this without Porter encouraging her or validating all her worst aspects). Then, she and Porter worked to kill the other Rat Grinders, an unwilling ritual that put them under the thrall of the rage god. Lucy was the last holdout, and was killed with the assumption that she would come back like they did, but she instead "stuck to her guns" and stayed dead.

I'm also going to interpret the shatter-star as an element of divine manipulation that drives people with rage to do actions they wouldn't do normally, but which are ultimately based on a kernel of truth. Think Adaine in the mall fight, "What would Adaine do if all she ever thought about was rage?" and Siobhan talking about the forest of Sylvaire being destroyed in the search for her mother. We know Adaine would never use such an excessive amount of destruction, but we see the underlying motivation to her actions.

So when the other Rat Grinders killed Lucy, they weren't exactly "sound of mind" as they were under the influence of the rage star, but they were still themselves, they still made the conscious choice to choose power over everything else. The rage star only elevated it to murderous heights; they never would've murdered her without its influence (in fact, I'd argue that the expectation she'd come back is why they did it in the first place), but the motivation still stemmed from a selfish want for power they all shared.

I think, too, that there's a thing with them, there's sort of a you can't have it both ways. The strategy that the Rat Grinders employ to get powerful is to do this grinding. Eventually, they get leveled up also by these powerful monsters that are being killed, they're allowed to join in with, but fundamentally it's like you can't have your cake and eat it too. Kipperlilly as a villain to me is very focused on, "Ooh, I can get by with the letter of the law and not the spirit. There's a better way to get powerful as an adventurer other than going on these important missions where you can probably die." That's the other thing, too, is you look at The Bad Kids, the Bad Kids run into that Corn Gremlin fight, and two of them die. They took a huge risk to save the school and stop something bad from happening, and the Rat Grinders never take that risk. So even as Kipperlilly is like, "Why aren't I getting what they're getting?" It's like, you're not making the choices they're making. Obviously grinding rats in the woods is a safer way to gain levels and the reward for doing it the safe way is you've never saved the world.

And with this last bit, Kipperlilly wanting the accolades of adventuring but without having to risk her life for it. It's interesting that Brennan mentions Kipperlilly avoiding "missions where you can probably die", because I've theorized before that part of the Rat Grinders' motivation for sticking to grinding is them not wanting to risk dying!

This is where genre conflict comes into play for me, because in a normal world I'd argue it's totally acceptable and fine for teenagers to do everything in their power to avoid Literally Dying. However, Spyre is not a normal world and runs on DnD conventions, where Aguefort trains them to be murderous "violent wanderers" who enact their will on the world, sometimes fatally. Death is also comparatively cheaper here when adventurers specifically have an easier time getting revived. The Rat Grinders may protest all they want about the standards of the genre that encourage crazy, violent, fatal behavior, but they're always going to be in the wrong genre and their protests are doomed to failure.

And "having your cake and eating it too". Her adventuring party never took those risks, so they don't get the rewards for saving the world.