#as long as they're bad good and not bad bad

[tealleaves4]

Can everyone just put their thinking caps on for a moment and open their minds a little?This isn't an attack AT ALL, this is a plea to everyone to start THINKING CRITICALLY and genuinely ASKING QUESTIONS about why society is collapsing. So many straight white cis dudes (and dudes in general) just actually HATE women and minorities and REFUSE to let them have any control because they think it means less control and power for them and frankly, they've just been RAISED to think competitively of literally everyone around them, including other men. Why would they want to give up the status quo when it still benefits them greatly in certain aspects? And before people start crying WOKE or SNOWFLAKE, etc. just STOP and LISTEN for a sec. NO, I'm not talking about all men, I'm talking about hateful and sexist men. If it doesn't apply to you and you are genuinely feminist and concerned for minorities, this obviously isn't about you. But if you think the shoe fits, please wear it, and seriously start thinking critically and ask yourself why so many women and people of color are upset right now. Maybe put yourself in THEIR shoes for a moment. We're TIRED of being controlled 24/7, TIRED of having our own bodies up for vote, not being allowed the same rights and privileges as straight white cis men, TIRED of still having to fight for 'rights' we supposedly gained in the Feminist and Civil Rights movements. Literally NOTHING has changed in the US in terms of attitudes towards women and minorities since this government's founding, because it was always based in white male-dominated Christian nationalism and capitalist control of the poor, besides straight up genocide and slavery. It literally is ALL ABOUT CONTROL, control of women's bodies, control of minorities, control of poor people's labor, etc. and who wants to give up control when they're the ones still in power? The right-wing ideology provides them comfort and a promise of continued power while still exploiting their labor (because let's face it, that's all capitalist governments want - warm bodies to exploit for profit). They don't realize even they are suffering because of the hateful ideology they themselves buy into, which oppresses literally EVERYONE, even men. We've dumbed down and white-washed education so much in this country that people have ZERO critical thinking skills whatsoever and ZERO ability to even think for themselves because they've been told since birth how and what to think. Patriarchy continues to reinforce these ideas, putting down men who aren't masculine enough, etc. People continue to vote against their own self-interests time and time again because they're constantly sold lies they blindly believe, and they can't even comprehend the consequences of their own actions because they were never taught basic anthropology, economics, or civics. We've unfortunately already lost our collective memory of how bad things were before the Feminist movement and the Civil Rights movement, and I don't think people, especially young people, can even comprehend just how bad things will continue to get. People need to WAKE UP from this capitalist, patriarchal nightmare dystopia and actually start cultivating COMPASSION for others, work towards solutions, and stop being so comfortable supporting the status quo. Because as long as y'all keep doing that, NOTHING gets better, for ANYONE. We won't be free until EVERYONE is free, and literally NOTHING changes if people are still BLINDLY supporting white-male capitalist (and fascist) ideologies without questioning anything critically. Again, not an attack on anyone AT ALL. You can't necessarily blame people that have been unfortunately RAISED that way for generations now. But when you know better, you should DO BETTER. And now is sure as fuck a good time to start.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[tlbodine]

So, Things Are Terrible and You Want to DO SOMETHING

The election is over and, ah...did not go well. While a lot of folks are doing a post mortem of the campaigns and trying to understand what happened with the vote and fighting over who shoulders the blame, we've gotta turn an eye toward the future and figure out, okay fam, where the fuck do we go from here.

I don't have all the answers on this, and I'm not an authority by any means, I'm just a horror author with a blog. But I've been thinking a lot about it and I wanted to share my thought process with others who might want to DO SOMETHING but feel they're spinning their wheels.

Buckle in. This will be a long one.

Step One: Understand the actual risks and stakes.

I think it is very easy to start panicking now about the worst possible case scenario -- jackbooted military busting into the door to disappear everyone who ever said something mean about Trump or bought a banned book or something -- and let fear turn into inaction.

I'm not saying things can't get that bad, and I'm not saying that it won't be absolutely terrifying right out the gate for some particularly at-risk groups -- but the distance between "now" and "V for Vendetta" is long and filled with a lot of intermediary steps. There will be so many opportunities to prevent the worst case scenario.

I say this because, if your mental image of "Bad Things Happening" is The Purge, it will be easy to wake up on inauguration day, look outside to see that the world is not on fire, think, hey, maybe things will be okay after all, and then completely disengage. Alternatively, you might feel so frozen with terror at the possibility of persecution that you do nothing. This is why people are saying: don't obey in advance.

It is essential for those of us with more privilege to use it to take care of those who are more vulnerable.

So. Who is most vulnerable? What does that vulnerability actually mean? What are the most likely risks of Trump's presidency? Here's a Guardian article that I think does a good job of summarizing some of the main issues. Go read that, then come back here.

Step Two: Take steps to protect yourself

You've gotta put your oxygen mask on first, right? So before you start getting involved in other causes, figure out what risks YOU are at, immediately, and do as much as you can to secure yourself. Some potential action steps depending on your circumstance may include:

Renewing your passport (helpful for leaving the country, but also for gender/name change purposes)

Getting vaccines / boosters

Securing birth control

Ensuring your necessary papers (birth certificates etc.) are where you have access to them.

Drawing up legal paperwork for spouses/partners (always a good idea, a helpful safety measure in case you lose marriage rights)

Bolstering your data privacy and online security. Here's a step-by-step guide I found that could help with that.

The specific steps you need to take here depend on what risks you, personally, face. You'll want to do some more research into this for your particular scenario.

No matter who you are, though, it's probably a good idea to start saving money and being a little more conservative with your spending and/or pay down debts to free up some cash. You don't know what kind of emergency may befall you, and having spare money for an emergency is never a bad idea.

There is a possibility that the cost of many things you rely on might go up, if Trump goes through with his tariffs plan. You will want to plan for that.

Food costs may also rise due to tariffs (we import a lot of food from Mexico and Latin America for example) as well as a loss of immigrant labor. There is also a possibility that food safety standards could fall due to overturning regulations. Now would be a good time to look into local food resources like farm share/CSA, community farms, etc., and to stock up on a few key staples like rice and beans.

Okay. Now that YOU are reasonably safe...what can you do to protect your community?

Step Three: Get Involved

Here is your mission: You need to stay engaged enough to know what's going on, without burning yourself out or exhausting yourself, and to take actual decisive actions instead of wasting your energy arguing on the internet.

Got that? Okay. Good. Here are some action steps:

Support independent journalism. Subscribe to local papers, donate to and watch public broadcast programming. I signed up for news from ProPublica, for example, as well as the news-roundup service What The Fuck Just Happened Today. The goal is to stay informed without falling down an endless rabbit hole of upsetting information.

Share news and resources with others in your circle. This can be a good use of social media. It's what I am doing right now!

If it is safe for you to do so, challenge and educate your friends/family members/neighbors/coworkers. Only if it is safe for you to do so. Do not put yourself at risk doing this. And do not waste your time arguing with people who are unlikely to change. But if you have well-meaning people in your life who you think could be won over, look for opportunities to do this - the right way. I've had some success with this, I will probably write a guide about it in the future. In the meantime, here's a good article that can help.

Join local grassroots activism groups. You'll have to do some work to decide what groups to join and which causes you want to support, because you cannot do everything. But there are tons of organizations taking direct action in all kinds of causes. Search "grassroots [cause] activists in [where you live]" to start finding things. Once you get involved in one group, you might meet people who can introduce you to other groups and causes. Yes, this means you will have to go outside and meet people. I'm sorry.

Join direct action groups. Same concept as above. You'll have to search in your area but once you know people it'll be easier to find more opportunities. Some of these groups may overlap. You might find direct action opportunities by engaging politically and vice versa. GO OUTSIDE AND TALK TO PEOPLE WHO ARE DOING THINGS TO HELP.

Get involved in local politics. Here are some quick tips. A lot of things are affected at the city level - stuff like book bans and bathroom bills are often battled first at local libraries and schools, and you can be part of those conversations! Sheriffs are elected and can have a big influence on local policing. Local elections affect how tax dollars are spent, how homeless populations are treated, and lots more. Don't snooze on local elections. Get involved and stay involved.

Look up your representatives. Get in the habit of calling, emailing, and writing letters. Figure out what legislature is being passed and then call your reps and harangue them about it - both to support bills you approve of and shoot down ones you don't. Sign petitions. Join email campaigns. Here's one you can go sign right now from the ACLU. See? Not that scary.

I think a lot of people figure that getting involved in politics doesn't matter or that it's all small potatoes but...man. The president is not god, no matter what he thinks. The sitting administration is not the sole power in the universe. There is an entire machine of government we can lean upon and act upon.

Finally, some general safety notes:

Some forms of direct action are not legal. Take steps to be safe if you choose to partake. Follow the lead of more seasoned activists for what forms of communication to use and so forth.

If you're not willing or able to put yourself at legal risk to act, you can help others by donating to bail funds and legal defense funds.

We've already seen this in some areas, and it will only get uglier - some bad actors are feeling emboldened by the change in regime and will misbehave. It's a good idea to learn some self-defense skills, in whatever way is comfortable to you, and brush up on some tenets of victimology that can help you stay safe. I'll write more about that in the future.

All right. That's all for now. It's by no means comprehensive...but should hopefully help you get started taking the next step. Stay safe out there.

[lotus-slumbers]

— Yandere! Batfam would never hurt you. The world would sooner burn down or the sun would go out. Either way, you wouldn't have to worry. They'd hold you close, keep you warm and safe. That was what they liked to believe.

— The dreams that most would take as nightmares but to them turned into something more biblical, like visions sent to warn them of the dying of the human race— or, worse, just you— clouded there judgement for months up until that fateful day.

— Yandere! Batfam thinks, maybe, just maybe, if they had thought with a clearer mind, you could have been saved. You wouldn't have fallen from such a great height and sunk like a stone, into the bottom of the sea.

— Yandere! Batfam wouldn't have brought you there with them at all, if they weren't so paranoid. So hell-bent and sure of themselves.

— Yandere! Batfam jumped in after you, into the icy water but you were already gone. In the dark, under prepared. They spent hours out there in search for you, until daylight and until dusk again.

— Yandere! Batfam knows that you were never meant to be there in the first place. The blame is fully on them but none of them want the crushing guilt resting fully on their own chest, so everyone's at each others throat like starving dogs, fighting for a bone that— that doesn't even exist. Being guiltless, being clean after what just happened.

— Maybe it turns into something more like a fight for territory in the end, after time passes and they know you are gone for good.

— The vision of who you were, contorting and twisting and being molded into something other each day when someone else says something. A story of who you were that doesn't match their narrative of every member of Yandere! Batfam.

— Yandere! Batfam all had slightly different versions of you inside of their head. All perfect, of course, but different. They don't want their perfect vision of you to be tampered with when it's all they have left of you.

— Jason leaves immediately, cursing God and Bruce. Spitting venom at anyone he can and in the privacy of the hide out he runs to, himself. He turns to bad habits quickly.

— A few others follow his lead, just a few weeks later. One by one, half of the Yandere! Batfam split apart and the remaining few who still live in the same home start to feel dead themselves.

— It's been a long time since it's been this quiet in the manor. Everyone in Yandere! Batfam looks sick and pale, like a bunch of ghosts living out the same day over and over again.

— Although they still fight for what they believe in, to save the innocent, to protect Gotham, they're much more like walking dead now. Gotham's cursed protectors, rising every night and dying every morning.

— Something broke in Yandere! Batfam that day. Of course it did.

— If they ever managed to figure out you weren't stuck at the bottom of the ocean, that you had survived and this had all been one cruel plan you had careful devised throughout the year they had you?

— Yandere! Batfam wouldn't stop their hunt for you, like blood sniffing hounds ready to go all the way to the gates of hell to retrieve you. Even further, into the depths of hell, if need be.

— They were bad before, (Y/n), but now something is BROKEN inside of them.

— You must remain as dead as the bottom of the sea, if you ever wish to remain free...

[jellieland]

Pearl is pretty sure she was just as much a traitor as Bigb was, today.

The only difference is that she wasn't found out.

Which is to say, the only difference is she had the good sense not to do it within earshot of Cleo, of all people. Honestly, what was he expecting?

She doesn't know, and she's not sure she ever will. Bigb's always been hard to read.

Maybe that's the point? Thinking about it, there is something enticing about the idea.

If people misinterpret you, accuse you, look at you like they don't know who you are. Wouldn't it be so much easier to deal with, if they were right? If you could focus on rebuttals, denials, honeyed words, without also having to nurse the tearing at your heart.

Or maybe that's not how Bigb thinks.

Maybe that's just her.

Not that that was why she did it this time, of course! It just seemed like it would be funny! She was just being a little silly!

Anyway, it's not like it even came to anything, in the end. Scott arrived and immediately heard Mumbo and Skizz and nothing even happened! He didn't even seem to be suspicious of her by the end of the interaction! They totally managed to throw him off the scent!

...Credit where it's due, that was some of the least unconvincing lying she's ever heard from Mumbo, which she does appreciate. She's still kind of surprised Scott bought it, though.

Anyway, nobody in her team knows what she said she would do, and it didn't actually get anyone hurt, so it's basically like it didn't happen. Why would she do anything to her team? They've been nothing but kind to her!

Nothing but kind to her, for as long as she remembers.

Yeah.

Bigb, though? Clearly untrustworthy, that one. Disloyal! A traitor!

She watches him back away, hiding behind a shield, and she lets her arrows fly. And oh, it's so satisfying. This time, she gets to be the one with the moral high ground, looking down, driving out, pushing away!

There's something powerful about it. It feels good. She likes it.

She's in a good position, in this team. She trusts everyone here. Of course she does.

Why wouldn't she?

...

Anyway, all she wants to do is have fun!

...Well, that's not totally true.

All she wants to do is keep Impulse safe.

That was her one condition for them, when she agreed to help them kill her teammates.

Whatever happens, she doesn't want Impulse to die.

The others... well. They're the others! What reason would she have, to wish them harm? And hey, even if she did, she knows full well the consequences of betraying them in a way they'll find out about. Of course she does!

She saw what happened to Bigb, after all.

It's not a total surprise, really. With the bad blood between him and Cleo, maybe it was just inevitable.

Maybe none of them can change who they are, in the end.

Maybe all they can do is get better at hiding it, until it all burns down like it always does.

[sbuttnutt]

Some things to remember with Plan B, progestin-only pills, and other emergency contraceptives:

- Plan B is less effective if you're over 150 lbs. Some sources say that taking two increases effectiveness over that weight.

- Plan B HAS to be taken within 72 hours of unprotected sex, and the earlier its taken the better. Stock up if you can!

-Plan B prevents ovulation, and it's not going to work if you've already ovulated for the month. Only take 1 per menstrual cycle.

- Even if you haven't ovulated, it's still not 100%, so always take a pregnancy about 2 weeks after unprotected sex.

-PLAN B IS NOT AN ABORTION!! Again, it just prevents ovulation, it will not harm an existing pregnancy.

-Progestin only birth control pills HAVE to be taken at the same time every day, otherwise the effectiveness decreases considerably.

-There are NO "PLACEBO DAYS" with progestin based birth control pills!

- Combined pills (which is what most people are familiar with: estrogen and progestin) come with a week of sugar pills that people can take to maintain the habit. That's when you get your period. With combined pills it's possible to just not take those pills or start a new pack instead of taking them to skip a period. That is NOT POSSIBLE with progestin pills. You have to take EVERY PILL IN THE PACK!!

-Progestin based methods (progestin pill, Nexplanon, IUD, Depo) can sometimes be better if you have intense migraines (especially with an aura) than estrogen/combined methods (combined pill, patch, nuvaring)

-Medication doesn't quite expire the same way that food does. Anyone with more pharmaceutical knowledge feel free to expand/correct me, but if your only options are to take an expired Plan B or don't take one at all, take the Plan B. OBVIOUSLY, TALK TO A DOCTOR OR PHARMACIST BEFORE YOU DO THIS!! Taking expired meds should be an absolute EMERGENCY LAST RESORT OPTION!!

- If you have health insurance and you're able to go to a doctor/urgent care, see if you can get a prescription for Ella. It's another type of emergency contraceptive (like Plan B) but it's more effective, more consistent, has a higher weight limit, and can be safely taken up to 96 hours after unprotected sex (5 days). However, it's prescription only. See if your provider will put in refills so you can easily and quickly pick it up from a pharmacy if you need another in the future.

-Plan B can also be written as a prescription, therefore covered by insurance! For example, in Colorado, Medicaid will cover the cost of Plan B completely if it's written as a prescription, talk to a pharmacist or your doctor about it!

-Some IUDs can be used as emergency contraception as well as long as they're placed within 96 hours of unprotected sex! In those instances they are over 99% effective as emergency contraception, and you can keep it in to continue to avoid pregnancy for 7-12 years. NOTE: this is ONLY the Paragard (copper, non-hormonal, and good for 10-12 years) and the Mirena/Liletta (hormonal, good for 7-8 years.)

- If nothing else works, use condoms or the pull out method!! It's not 100%, but it's WAYYY better than nothing!

There's obviously so much more to be said about birth control and emergency contraceptives. Please please PLEASE, if you can get pregnant and don't want to, go to a Planned Parenthood, OBGYN, urgent care, primary care physician, or even your pharmacist and create a birth control plan. A lot of pharmacies will have a telehealth program that's very cheap and easy to get prescriptions, and will even provide discount codes for medication if you don't have insurance. With a GoodRX coupon, common birth control pills are like $10 a month, sometimes even cheaper.

There are no morals attached to getting an abortion. As someone who has worked directly with patients in abortion care for over 3 years, I promise you that you are not a bad person if you need one. Many people do, it's a fact of life. But for the majority of people, it is much cheaper and easier to come up with contraceptive plan first.

You don't HAVE to use hormonal birth control, but take some time to come up with a plan! I promise it'll make your life much simpler in the long run.

(PS: There is, of course, much more nuance to this than I've addressed. Not everyone can take hormonal birth control, but if you're in the US or somewhere else that severely limits abortion, it is YOUR responsibility to come up with a contraceptive plan. There are tons of non-hormonal options, and honestly some of them really suck, but they're ALL better at preventing pregnancy than no contraception at all.)

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

Plan B has a shelf life of 4 years

(Also, you can get 4 months of over the counter birth control (progestin-only pill form) at Costco for $50. Or 3 months on Amazon for about $45.)

[glitter-stained]

Yaaayyy I’ve thought for so long that brushing aside Tim’s victim blaming is WAY more boring than explaining it as his way of dealing with the fear. Jason died but *I’m* not gonna die because I won’t be Jason. I don’t have to be afraid of dying because I’m not gonna die because I’m not bad. And that’s on both W&D levels, early tim is hard for me to read because he’s SUCH a suck up and Bruce and dick are going “this kid sure is good at ___” and smiling stupidly all the time. I can just see the hand of the author going “see! He’s not Jason!”

Yeah like when they made him beat Joker in a fight and you can see them be like "see? This robin is different!" Like bro beating joker up isn't hard, (in fact I'm pretty sure jaybin did it once, though I can't remember if it was pre or post-crisis. Now if Janet had tricked Tim, pointed a gun at him and tied him up, maybe that would have been a fairer comparison. By choosing to make such an unfair comparison, dc is being very transparent in how they're willfully trying to make us forget all the parts of Jason's death that were outside of his control to insist on his "failures" instead. And Tim, like a mirror, parrots this narrative and feeds it to Bruce, which alleviates his guilt and so he feeds it back to him. If this had gone against the meta instead of being a reflection of it (so basically if Alfred had called them out on it instead of reinforcing it) it would have been so interesting... Alas.

I just wish one character in dc would call the hero community out on their victim-blaming problem and how they're using it as a shield because goddamn!

[fiona-fififi]

You know, the more I think about it, the more I do actually think a storyline about Buck fucking around (or at least dating around) would be interesting. Like, my first instinct was that it would be bad for Buck, specifically, because he's always used sex in unhealthy ways and because I really do think he's seeking a permanent kind of love.

But, you know, that's not working for him right now. He's spent 8 years entering what he hopes to be long-term, forever kinds of relationships and they just keep falling through. Abby, Ali, Taylor, Natalia, Tommy. Five failed relationships, all of which he clung to beyond their expiration date (well, all except Ali, I guess). That's a lot for him to just want to try to jump in with another person he doesn't know and try to make it work, and he has just discovered this new part of his identity—which, of course, for some people, they wouldn't need to explore—but I do think it's something a single, unattached Buck would want to explore.

And I don't even necessarily think this would have to be a backslide. But if it was, that would be okay, too, because healing isn't linear and people fuck up and do things that aren't good for them all the time, and Buck feeling hopeless and going back to his old ways because what he really wants isn't working, makes a lot of sense to me. I will admit, my first instinct was that I didn't want him to backslide, but actually, I do think there would be an interesting story to tell there, and it might even sell the way his character has stagnated in the same boring, unfulfilling relationships over and over again by calling attention to it and recognizing that Buck is feeling it, too—not just that the particular most recent relationship has failed, but that he's feeling like he's not worthy, can't make things work, isn't meant to be loved because it keeps happening. Which I don't think they've ever explored in depth before.

So having Buck backslide, or even just take a step back and decide he wants to have some casual sex for a bit while he tries to figure himself out (and by that, I do not mean his sexuality, but rather what he needs to make him happy), then I think there actually could be a really interesting story to be told there that would be both very true to the character and would serve to break this broken record of storylines for him (because yeah, it's been done before, but at least not since s1, really).

And honestly, I'm not sure where else they would go with Buck right now. This does actually feel like a logical progression for him, and I can't think of anything else they could do with him unless they decide to speedrun buddie and/or intertwine him fully with the Eddie and Chris plot (which I could see happening, and I also think could work). But beyond that, I don't see an obvious logical story progression for Buck at this moment, and I would rather see him backslide a bit with this than have them slap some completely random new plotline on him without warning, because we've all seen how poorly those have been handled lately.

And as an aside, I could also see a Buck backslide potentially causing some of the tension they're talking about for Buck and Eddie. Because Eddie's never directly known that part of Buck, and last season, he was ensuring Buck that he'd seen the growth in him and trusted him to talk to Christopher because of his past and his growth beyond it. And I could see Eddie struggling a bit with a side of Buck he's never actually encountered before, and maybe (if it is a legitimate backslide for him, and he's using casual sex as an unhealthy coping mechanism) with a part of Buck he doesn't know how to help.

[mariacallous]

This election should be a wake-up call to blue states to get our fucking houses in order - because for a long time we've been able to coast and not really focus on genuine, tangible, and as quick as possibly can be implemented changes and reforms to shit *WE* think is bad. The uniform swings to Trump across the board are at part a sign that people are tired of how shit is going, even in places that oppose him overall.

Blue states will not escape unscathed, and voters in blue states have shown they're getting fed up. Trump doing well in places with high costs of living and high foreign-born populations is not a good thing, and too many blue state elected officials don't actually do the hard work of governing.

NYS is full of people at the city and state level who are Activists in Office and pass legislation that gets struck down by courts (UNIFORMLY, NOT JUST WITH REPUBLICAN-APPOINTED JUDGES) because they're sloppy, contradictory, and unconstitutional. Or they talk a big game and then pass the most lackluster legislation that's a bandage to the issue.

Or they focus on The Issue Of The Moment and pass a package of 6 bills with 468 new requirements and 239 deadlines and it's for something that a) should be part of a broader focus and/or b) is a relatively niche issue.

And then there are those who are the epitome of the "in this house we..." progressives who also Don't Want More Housing Development In My Neighborhood and "worry about whether the neighborhood can handle an influx". Is that concern valid? Sometimes! But not uniformly.

All of this is creating an environment where more and more people are fed up and turning to whatever will let them express their discontent and potentially, they think, benefit them. And the consequences and outcomes will not be pretty for anyone.

If we don't start to fix shit - especially the shit that is almost entirely within the control of local and state governments - we will pay dearly for it, and repeatedly.

So blue states - buckle up fuckleheads and let's get the fuck to work on the shit we can and need to fix.

[minnaci]

im thinking about friends to lovers today and specifically confessions. just... the person you've known for so long, who you've loved for so long, taking your hand in theirs. you've held hands with them before, but this feels different, somehow. they pull your hand to their chest— a familiar move, one that lets you feel the heart beating against their ribs— and they meet your gaze, eyes filled with an indescribable type of softness.

they murmur your name. you've always loved the way their lips form around it. you know what they're about to say before they say it.

"i'm so in love with you." they're tender, vulnerable. they let go of your hand to cup your face instead, rubbing a gentle thumb over the thin, delicate skin of your undereyes. you lean into the affection.

it's... inevitable, you think. you know them, bone deep. the good, the bad, and the ugly. and you love every part of them.

"i love you," they repeat, the hint of a smile growing on their face as you press a kiss to the center of their palm. they know your answer— of course they know your answer— and they pull you into their arms.

in the circle of their arms, your whisper ghosts over the shell of their ear. "i love you, too."

[reallydipperaninvisiblewizard]

I don't like defending the Democratic Party, but I think in this case against these arguments it has some value. I agree that establishment Democrats are annoying as hell and made a lot of really bad choices in this election, but I feel focusing on destroying them is maybe misplaced effort.

Democratic presidential candidates have won the popular vote in 7 of the last 8 elections, so it's hard to argue their policies are unpopular. Because of the Electoral College only a few states' votes matter, and they're centrist voters or they wouldn't be swing states, so we're going to get mostly centrist polices until the country as a whole moves left or we switch to the popular vote. I wish that wasn't the case and that we were more progressive, but we've been fighting that battle with the conservative media outlets for as long as this country has existed.

And, the fascists have been trying to take over the conservative party also for most of this countries' history. McCarthy made some progress, Reagan kind of succeeded, but the Tea Party didn't, nor did Trump in his first term. "Taking over" the Democratic party could take at least as long.

Finally, we, as progressives, have a long established habit of in-fighting. Rather than attack the Democratic party, who are bad-to-imperfect allies, maybe try to work through your disagreements with them to focus on an actual enemy, the Republican party. It's harder and less satisfying, but that's how the government sausage actually gets made.

I do think your methods are mostly good. We need local and state leaders, who the Republicans have been gobbling up for more than 50 years, who can do things like redraw districting lines and appoint honest election officials. And we need a crop of experienced, inspiring figures who can take over as existing Democrats leave office. I recently found out about these folks, who seem pretty legit: https://leaderswedeserve.com/

All the takes are correct and yet they also miss the point. Yes, it was insane for the Democrats to think they could win by running a soulless candidate, without a shred of progressive policy vision, pursuing endorsements from neocon war-hawks everybody hates, while arming and funding a genocide, and belittling and crushing those who have enough morality to protest it. It is enraging that the Democrats are so smug and blind to this. But these are all just symptoms. The deeper reality is that liberalism has failed, liberalism is dead, and people urgently need to wake up to this fact and respond accordingly. It is a defunct ideology that cannot offer any meaningful solutions to our social and ecological crises and it must be abandoned. Democrats have proven over and over again that they cannot accept even basic steps like public healthcare, affordable housing, and a public job guarantee - things that would dramatically improve the material, social and political conditions of the working classes. And they cannot accept a public finance strategy that would steer production away from fossil fuels and toward green transition to give us a shot at a liveable future. Why? Because these things run against the objectives of capital accumulation. And for liberals capital is sacrosanct. They will do whatever it takes to ensure elite accumulation, it is their only consistent commitment. At home, they suppress and demonize progressive and socialist tendencies. Abroad, they engage in endless wars and violence to suppress input prices in the global South and prevent any possibility of sovereign economic development. The Democrats have done all this purposefully and knowingly, for my whole life, not as some kind of "mistake" but in full consciousness that it is in the interests of capital. And because liberalism cannot address our crises, and because it crushes socialist alternatives, it inevitably paves the way for right-wing populism. They know this pattern, and yet they risk it every time - this election being only the most recent example. They did it in 2016, when they actively crushed the Sanders campaign and sent Trump to the White House. They do it because ultimately they (and I mean the liberal ruling class here) don't really mind if fascists take power, so long as the latter too ensure the conditions for capital accumulation. They 100% prefer this to the possibility of a socialist alternative. So, progressives have to face reality. The dream of "converting" the Democratic party is dead. This is now a fact and it must be accepted. The only option is to build a mass-based movement that can reclaim the working classes and mobilize a political vehicle that can integrate disparate progressive struggles into a unified and formidable political force and achieve substantive transformation. This will take real work, actual organizing, but it must be done and that process must begin now.

Jason Hickel

[httpvomitello]

can I get a request on rottmnt turtles with the reader having a little brother or sister

Hello, hello! Sorry for taking so long to respond, but I hope you enjoy! ♡♡♡♡

Leo’s first reaction upon seeing your little sibling is pure shock

He wasn’t expecting a tiny human to suddenly waddle into the room with a stuffed animal clutched in her tiny hands

“Whoa, who’s this little ninja?” he’d ask, crouching down to her level, his tone playful but a little unsure

Your sister, ever curious, would toddle over to him without hesitation

Leo’s heart melts instantly when she offer him her toy

He’d be surprisingly good with her, making exaggerated gestures and silly faces to keep her entertained

He even uses his sword (safely) to pretend to fight off invisible bad guys, all to make your sister giggle

Later, he’d lean over to you and say, “I gotta say, your sibling might just be cooler than you.”

Leo gets a slap on the back of the head, but the smile doesn't leave his face.

Raph freezes when he first spots your little brother

The sight of a tiny human staring up at him with wide eyes makes him feel like a giant, even more than usual

“Uh…hey, kid,” he says awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck. He’s not used to dealing with toddlers

Your brother, on the other hand, finds him fascinating and waddles over, tugging at his large hand

Raph’s heart instantly softens

Within minutes, he’s letting them climb all over him like he’s a jungle gym, carefully ensuring they don’t fall

“You’re strong, little guy,” he’d say with a chuckle, lifting them effortlessly into the air.

He’d later tell you, “Your brother is so adorable!”

From that moment on, Raph tries to make up any excuse just to visit you and see your brother.

Donnie immediately gets analytical when he sees your sibling

“Ah, a miniature human specimen. Fascinating,” he’d mutter, adjusting his goggles

He’s initially unsure how to interact, but your sister curiosity draws her to his tech

She poke at his tablet, and Donnie can’t help but smile

“Careful, little one, that’s a delicate piece of machinery,” he’d say, though his tone is more amused than annoyed

He might even build a simple, safe gadget to keep her entertained

As your sister plays with his creation, Donnie observes with a fond smile

“She got potential,” he tells you. “A brilliant mind in the making, obviously took after you.”

Mikey is instantly smitten the moment your brother appears

“Oh my gosh, look at this little dude!” he exclaims, dropping to the floor to be at their level

Your brother is equally enchanted by Mikey’s vibrant energy

They're giggling within seconds as he pulls out a yo-yo and performs tricks just for your brother

He’d play games, like peek-a-boo or making silly faces, and would even draw quick doodles of them with his graffiti markers

“You’ve got the cutest brother ever, babe,” he’d gush later. “We should totally set up a playdate. I mean, I’ll do all the playing, but still.”

By the end of the visit, your brother would be clinging to Mikey, not wanting him to leave, and Mikey would promise to come back and bring even more fun next time.

[factual-fantasy]

27 Asks! Thank you! :}} 🤡

I'm on the fence about it..

While I've poured a lot of effort into my redesigns and would love to show them off.. at the same time I don't want a repeat of Octonauts were everyone just disrespects my boundaries and copies my designs line for line. And sometimes worse, copies them and claims that they made the designs themselves.

TADC is pretty popular right now so I just think posting full ref sheets is not a good idea 💀

@beryl-shade @chickenheadguy

Yeah for a while there I didn't know anything about the game and only had OCs. Buuuuut I wanted to make proper grounded lore for my cookies, aaaand I loved the canon cookies designs so much that I just bit the bullet and dowloaded OvenBreak, Kingdom and Tower of Adventures.

I didn't like the gameplay for OvenBreak and abandoned that game pretty quick. I became OBSESSED with Kingdom and I still haven't tried Tower of adventures-

I have a very bad perception of time.. but my guess is I've been playing CookieRun: Kingdom for at least 2-3 weeks or so.. ? Its been a blast so far :)))

@wolfie-777

I've been drawing for as long as I can remember.. so I cant pin point exactly what my first OC was.. but in this OC challenge here, you can see one of the oldest that I can remember! :0 (There's no way he was ACTUALLY my very first one <XDD )

I've been to many different doctors in attempt to find the problem. <:( They believe they've found it. So now its just a matter of trying to treat it. 😔

@sergioho45

Only if they come with syrup and butter 👁️👁️

Thank you <:')) I've been doing my best to take it easy and stay away from Tumblr for a bit.. I'm hoping I get my confidence back soon and can return with some more TADC stuff <:}}}

@pewpewae (Referencing this post)

Thank you.. that means a lot to me 🥹💞💞

@caprico54

THEY WHAT

@milmaxtor

THANK YOU!! :DD AND AWWWW I WANT TO KISS THE KITTY ON THE FOREHEADDDD

@captain-skyler1987

YOU ARE THE COW??

@spookycolorooooo

Awe! Thank you! :}} AND AWW THEY'RE SO CUTEEE 😭😭😭

(Referencing this post)

There's also evidence to suggest that he wasn't dubbing my comic "for fun" or just as a "gift". It looks more like he was using it to expand his portfolio. Pretty scummy.

Also thankfully I haven't had any of his supporters flood my ask box, But I'd been on the look out for them.

@youlikwjazz004

I've watched a few of the movies but I don't really remember them <:/ my only opinion is "WOW that thing is very weirdly shaped" XDD

@lostlornghost

I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do with this information <XD

@misscherrypie

<:'}} Thank you so much! Your guys's support means the world to me😭😭

@knifecatss

The first thing that came to mind is that she loves to eat! XDD

@zboigames

While I'm glad you likes my Mario stuff, the ask button and my pinned post says I don't take requests!

@milmaxtor

AWWW I LOVE HER SHES SO SILLYY!!!

Realllll 😭😭for me I'd want the cautious and swift dark cacao warriors to be playable considering their role in beast yeast..

@ardent-38

Thank you! :DD Also I have not seen that movie <:((

(Also you thought of me? Awe,,🥹🥹)

So am I <XD I present to you!,

A crunch bar! :))

:Dd Thank you! I hope your Halloween/Friday was good too! :))

🥺...... Dark Cacoaaaaaa.....

(Link in asks)

Oh no... the lore is getting complicated...

Wait, don't you mean OvenBreak? They don't look like that in CookieRun: Kingdom..

Yeah so I've seen, but I'm not interested in Golden Cheese 😅 I like Dark Cacoa :)))

GAH! I BEEN BOOPED!

[dreamgirljune]

i work with toddlers. each day is bright and funny and usually leaves me covered in glitter. and they help me see the world in a better light. whenever they snatch a toy from a friend, or throw something at me, or express their anger in some hurtful way, i like to sit with them. i tell them they were being mean to their friend. and i know they're not mean. so let's take a deep breath, and go give that friend a hug.

i've never been very good at loving myself. for every step forward into gentleness, i take three back into the cycle of self-deprecation. all the worst things i think about myself. i'm not as loving as i could be. i'm not as lovable as i should be. there has been a river of self-hatred running through me for as long as i can remember. i was 6 and cursing this supposed evil inside of me.

but there have been people in my life who have loved me well. i think of my sister, who has made every effort to help be kind to myself. if there is an evil rotting away at my core, it is not so big and not so wicked that it makes me impossible to love.

when it gets bad again, i start talking to myself like one of my kids. i remind myself i'm being mean to myself. and i don't want to be mean. so i need to take a deep breath, and hold onto the people who love me. i will hold my sister's hand until i am ready to hold my own. i will not let the sadness keep me from walking, sometimes crawling, into the light.

[quantomeno]

I have been trying to find the article or opinion piece or whatever I read that discussed this, but this appears to be a significant issue with all left-leaning governments. If you'll forgive the gendered language:

Political analysts have long considered these three fields – managing the finances, managing the economy, and defence – to represent the “daddy” aspects of national political persona, traditionally dominated by centre-right parties the world over. The centre-left parties have been seen to excel in the more “caring” fields of health and education: the “mummy” aspect.

(from here, an opinion piece in the Sydney Morning Herald, which I don't think was exactly the thing I was looking for, but it's the same idea more or less)

People in the tags have noted this occurs with the Tories/Labour in the UK, and it definitely occurs in Australia with the Liberals/Labor (the Liberals are conservatives by the way, it's confusing, we know).

The problem is that people often don't 'feel' the effects of economic improvement, or they fixate on things that are still bad and think when the government is talking about improvements they're lying or think the improvements are happening to other people, probably 'coastal elites' or what we in Australia might call 'inner city latte sippers'.

Then the right can capitalise on this resentment, and even if they don't achieve their claims of making life better, people have such short memories they don't realise things have worsened. Another issue is the fact left-wing policies tend to involved bigger government involvement or significant changes to the status quo, and the right can then run scare campaigns which the left can't combat because having nuanced debates over complicated policies doesn't make snappy headlines. And you also get, as @what-even-is-this said above, the left inheriting failing economies and the right inheriting improving economies. So things often get blurred about who was responsible for what benefit, and if things are good under one government, the other will claim it was because of their actions before it etc etc.

Celinda Lake (Biden's pollster in 2020) was interviewed on the Australian TV show Planet America this week and said something very similar (it starts at 28:23), that the Democrats need a better economic message, a better 'conversation' with the voters the Democrats traditionally worked to support but who now believe the Republicans will help them more.

It is quite sad to admit, but it seems people often care more about their economic wellbeing than any other consideration. Part of it is a sort of survivalism though, where they go, yes, I would like to help xyz, but I'm struggling too.

From my position, well at a distance, I got the vibe this election was just people annoyed at the current administration and going to literally the only viable alternative, as opposed to a population shifting dramatically in their political views. I expect a lot of people don't like the guy who'll be president and don't really even want him to be president, but still voted for him because of his party. It's an electorate who has long been made to believe left bad at economy, right good at economy. Plus you guys don't have a third parties that presents itself as a viable alternative.

Elections are often decided by the political issues that the right is seen to be better at, but a lot of it is just bluff and posturing. The right can talk tough and it makes people think they're getting things done. It's not until it all unravels that people will consider the left. I've got a long discussion about Aus politics below if you want to read about it, which provides some more concrete examples of these things.

Also there are obviously other issues at play, the electorate isn't one monolith, people have individual reasons for voting etc etc etc. This is just one thing that I think was a big factor generally. Harris seemed to be too much a part of an administration they were unhappy with and people weren't convinced she would bring anything new to fix things.

Australia has two major parties, the left-wing Australian Labor Party (yes, Australian English spells it labour, but the party is US-style, it's a long story) and the right-wing Liberal Party (they are conservatives but they're called Liberals. The reason is they believe in libertarian sort of values like the free market and small government). The Liberals govern in coalition with the National Party (ostensibly the party of the farmers and rural Australians, they're more right wing than the Liberals), and so we often call them the Coalition.

(Also, Labor is red and the Liberals are blue, so our colours are opposite of US but the same as the UK. This isn't important right now but I enjoy reminding americans that their colour-coding of politics is actually not the norm)

After 11 years of Coalition government under John Howard, we elected Kevin Rudd and the Labor Party in 2007. Then the GFC happened. Labor got us through very well, relatively speaking. But K-Rudd was losing popularity so members of the Labor party decided to vote for a new leader (this wasn't an election: for any Americans out there, the prime ministership isn't an elected position, it's just the leader of the party in power and they can choose that amongst themselves). And so we got Julia Gillard, our first female PM. She narrowly won the next election, and suffered through a number of things that lowered her standing in the polls (including misogyny, but also a few broken election promises the opposition pounced on) and so before the next election they backstabbed her and reinstated Kevin, hoping the change would improve their odds. It didn't work: Labor lost to (shudder) Tony Abbott and the Coalition. I really dislike Abbott. Raw-onion-with-the-skin-on-eating Abbott. 'Suppository of all wisdom' Abbott. 'Shit happens' Abbott. Wanting-to-knight Prince-Phillip Abbott. I mean, these are just his gaffes. The less said of his politics and personality the better.

The Liberals governed for a simultaneously stagnant and tumultuous nine years. Nine years with three prime ministers being overthrown by their own party and never actually getting all that much done. Abbott, rapidly losing favourability, was replaced with Malcolm Turnbull, an erudite, moderate Liberal who was under constant attack from his government's right wing and got murdered by them at the slightest whiff of a policy that might have the vaguest of emission reduction targets (these years are known as the climate wars and they're still not really over). Turnbull gave way to Scott Morrison. Scomo went to the election with really only one major economic policy which was some tax cuts. He won. Then the pandemic happened and yeah. We went massively into debt due to the huge spending required to keep everyone afloat. I am glad the Libs did that, but it points out their hypocrisy since they had banged on and on about Labor's 'debts and deficits' (I think particularly to do with spending during the GFC) and yet had not given a single budget surplus (i.e. they had been spending more than they gained in taxes etc) in that entire 9 years. And then, when it's their turn to spend big to save the economy, they're happy to ignore debts.

Labor was led during this time by Bill Shorten, a good guy but no one really liked him, nor his 'zingers', and his policies involved a lot of reforms and changes, leaving him open to scare campaigns from the right. Labor eventually decided to shed Bill and put in Anthony Albanese. Albo ran a very small target campaign to try to neutralise the differences between him and Scomo. It was... moderately successful. Labor got into government but really, it was the Liberals who lost because we all just disliked Scotty from Marketing (he mishandled the pandemic on a number of fronts, among other crises including, but not limited to, going to Hawaii during the 2019-20 bushfires and sexual misconduct allegations involving members of his party). The 2022 federal election is a story of its own though. The point is, Labor got into power.

They have given us our first budget surplus in 15 years. A budget surplus had been hyped up by successive Liberal governments who consistently failed to deliver one. Sure, Labor is still dealing with a housing crisis, but prices had been rising under the Coalition who just twiddled their thumbs and eventually suggested the policy of allowing people spend their superannuation (it's a bit like the US 401(k): here it's compulsory for money to go into a fund which you can't access until retirement) on a house (they're still suggesting this last I heard). And inflation has been high, but it seems to be going down, and the inflation was the result of (guess what) high levels of government spending during the pandemic (combined with supply issues caused by wars and the pandemic). Labor has done a decent job of bringing the economy back on track. They've been fiscally responsible. They even rejigged Scott's tax cuts to make them better for lower-income earners. Labor is clearly on par, if not better, at handling the economy and have shown this twice in my lifetime.

But do they get any credit for this? As if!

Labor has been absolute rubbish at explaining how they're helping people. Rubbish! It's why the Voice to Parliament referendum failed, because no one explained it clearly and succinctly. I don't think it failed because people were really racist, I think they just didn't get the point of it. I mean, some of it was underlying racism and a sense of 'why do they deserve this? don't they have enough?' but that stems again from a communication issue since people don't understand how big the gap still is. (for confused non-Australians, I'm talking about the referendum to enshrine in the constitution an advisory group of Indigenous Australians who would give advice to the government about matters pertaining to First Nations issues. The referendum failed abysmally)

Labor is currently heading towards a minority government (they will be the biggest party, but won't have a proper majority in parliament and will need to deal with a crossbench of minor parties and independents). They're expected to win partly because the Liberals are becoming increasingly right-wing (they lost a lot of their moderates at the last election to independents) and the current leader of the Libs looks like Mr Potato Head and has all the warmth of Darth Vader, so they might not win the centre very easily (we have compulsory voting, so you need to be at least relatively moderate to win big). But Labor will struggle (and could still lose) because Albanese is just terrible at getting any cut-through. It's pitiful. Personally, I'd kinda like Penny Wong as PM but she'd need to resign as a senator and be elected to the house of reps, so it's highly unlikely (plus I do like her in the Foreign Affairs portfolio). I think Jim Chalmers, our current treasurer, would be a good fit. He's got twice the charm of Albo and ten times that of Peter Dutton (Darth Potatohead, the current leader of the Liberals). He's also an effective communicator and can take a lot of credit for the economy since he's the guy making the budgets. I don't necessarily think he's an amazing treasurer (he's no Paul Keating), but he's done a good job. The thing is, Labor is highly unlikely to have another leadership spill for fear of appearing unstable (they made it much harder to have a spill after the Rudd-Gillard-Rudd debacle).

And sadly, Dutton has quite a bite, and loves to rip into Labor right where it hurts: the economy and immigration.

Don't get me started on immigration... I totally skipped over it but it's been a big issue here just like in the US.

Also I am not the biggest fan of Labor after they started to shift rightwards (the whole 'neutralise issues' thing). They're a bit like the Democrats in that sense, but the situation is a little different.

It seems like there’s this cycle of republicans making the economy bad and then people get tired of the republicans and elect a democrat and the democrat inherits a bad economy and then they sort of fix it somewhat and then people are like hey the economy is bad it was better during the Republican administration and then they elect a Republican who inherits a better economy from the democrat while he’s trashing it and then people are like hey he’s trashing the economy and then they elect a democrat who inherits a bad economy and fixes it somewhat and then people are like hey the economy was better when there was a Republican and then they elect a Republican who trashes the sort of better economy he inherited from the democrat and so on and so forth like forever I guess

[dark-konohagakure2]

Hi can you write Teuande and sakura with a young female worker who they like to grop, sexually harrase. And force her to be naked 24/7 around them. Maybe she has clit leash or nipple claps and they always pull her from their like their own dog.

tw: noncon, abuse of power, workplace harassment, degradation, nipple clamps, clit clamps, mild petplay, exhibitionism, manipulation, cunnilingus, age difference

All characters depicted are 18+

Tsunade is very particular about who she allows to be her students. Sakura is her most trusted disciple due to her strength and intelligence, but the Hokage could always use another promising young lady to mold and guide, just not in the ways of medical ninjutsu and taijutsu, instead Tsunade requires someone who can provide something that has been sorely lacking for both women; some entertainment.

Tsunade really knows how to pick them, the kunoichi she picks to train with her and Sakura is a very cute and skilled young lady. Strong, but not strong enough to fight back against the Hokage, not to mention she is a very obedient shinobi. The girl is of course thrilled at the rare opportunity to train with both the Hokage and one of the strongest kunoichi of her own generation, she'd be a fool to turn down such a privilege.

All is well at first, but not for very long. One minute the girl is thanking her Lady for letting her learn underneath the Sannin, the next Tsunade is telling her to remove all her clothes. But not to worry, Tsunade is going to give her a brand new, and much more fitting uniform; a set of nipple clamps and a matching one for her clit. It'll be abundantly clear that she's not here as a student, but as a pet.

Sakura isn't the type to seem like a bully, but she is going to enjoy teasing her underclassmen, enjoying the seniority she has over the new student. The pink haired medical ninja is always looking for an excuse to tug on the clit leash or to tighten the already snug nipple clamps. While not as strict and domineering as Tsunade, Sakura is much more teasing.

"Oh come on! This is just some simple endurance training, hun! So be a good girl and take it before I tell Lady Tsunade how disobedient you've been today."

Tsunade is no better than her student when it comes to being mean to her little student. She'll use her power as both a Sannin and a Kage to force her subordinate to remain naked at all times, even when others are entering the office, Tsunade will even casually play with the young woman's naked body in front of others, this will quickly earn the poor girl quite the reputation, she'll be known throughout the village, and even by a few people in other villages, as Tsunade's obedient little fucktoy.

The humiliation doesn't just stop with the forced nudity and bondage, the two medical nin are very busy women, with Tsunade being the head of the village and Sakura being the head of the medical department, so they need some serious stress relief. It's not rare for the two women to pass her back and forth, forcing her to take turns eating both of them out until they're satisfied, praising her for getting so much better at eating pussy after all her training.

Getting passed around will soon become routine for the poor kunoichi, she'll be used as a reward for any shinobi who does a good job at their missions, she'll mostly be used by those who are close to the two women, such as Shizune and the men of Team 7, her cute body is perfect for boosting the morale of the Leaf jonnin, and it gives the girl the occasional much needed dose of dick, so everyone wins.

Tsunade is still a kind woman however, she's not going to be nothing but cruel to her beloved pet. She'll still be punished if she's a bad girl, bit if she's a very good girl, Tsunade will reward her with affection and pleasure, she'll even occasionally get the girl some gifts, although they aren't always very appreciated...

"You've been very good for me, haven't you? Well I guess that means you get a reward. If you put this collar on then you won't have to worry about me pulling on that cute little clit of yours! Isn't that nice?"

The wannabe medical ninja ended up getting exactly what she's always wanted, albeit in a twisted way. She wanted to be known throughout the entire village, and now she is. Just not for any of her combat of medical abilities...

[thepeacefulgarden]

And remember, they don't have to hit you in order to qualify as an abuser. Do they...

Say mean and/or creepy things and then try to walk it back as "just a joke?"

Tell you that you're "too sensitive" when you call out their words or behavior?

Use the Bible, the Quran, the Torah, the Vedas, or any other religious text to justify mistreating you?

Treat you badly, apologize, promise never to do it again, and proceed to do it again?

Try to control where you go, how you dress, who you see and talk to, what and how much you eat, etc.?

Snoop through your phone, emails, belongings, or other private stuff without your OK? Or manipulate you into "letting" them do so?

Track your menstrual cycle (if you have one) without your OK? Or manipulate you into "letting" them do so?

Try to make you keep a pregnancy you don't want (or terminate one you do)? Or try to dictate what (if any) birth control you use?

Threaten to hurt themselves or other people if you leave, or "step out of line?"

Break or throw things when they're upset?

Punch holes in walls, doors, etc.?

Make you (or try to make you) engage in sexual acts you don't enjoy, don't feel ready for, don't feel comfortable with, or just plain aren't in the mood for?

Try to make you feel like a bad person for saying "no" to sex?

Try to distance you from your friends and family?

Actively try to turn your friends and family against you? Or you against them?

Get mad when you say no or try to set a boundary?

Call you degrading names?

Use your insecurities against you?

"Neg" or "should" you into conforming to their preferences?

Try to get you to quit your job, or get you fired?

Use drugs, alcohol, a bad day at work, or whatever their deal is as an excuse for their behavior? If so, you need to get out. Now. Make a plan. I promise, it doesn't get better as long as you are in this relationship. You cannot love the red flags out of people. Even if they don't hit you now, there's a good chance they'll start sooner or later; abuse has a nasty tendency to escalate.