#as a job would you walk up to them and be like yeah but on a biological and philosophical level what is the Point of it ? i dont think its

[freshxsturniolo]

but, why? CHRIS STUNRIOLO x FEM!READER - PART THREE.

Part 1 ∣ Part 2

a smile illuminates your face as you walk across the bar after using the bathroom, jasons eyes finding your instantly. gods, he was gorgeous. so gorgeous. you'd had such a lovely evening and enjoyed every second of his and his friends company, but there was a feeling inside of you that just needed to be home.

"did you manage to get an uber?" he asked as you reached him, his hand reaching for your instantly as you sit down. you plaster on a smile and lean forward to drop a small kiss to his lips. gods, those lips.

"yeah. it'll be here shortly." you say, pulling back away and squeezing his hand tightly before letting go, grabbing your drink and finishing the final sip. you had no idea how many drinks you'd had over the last few hours. jason and his friends had done a fine job of ensuring your purse and bank card stayed firmly away, and a drink was always in your hand.

"I feel so bad. are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" he leans forward, his hand finding your thigh. your leg tenses on contact, and a warmth washes over you as his hand slowly rubs against your bare skin. "we could go back to mine. or yours." he drops kiss behind your ear and you let out a shaky breath.

truthfully, you had fully expect the night to end exactly like that. you'd made every effort possible, you'd cleaned your apartment within an inch of its life incase he finally came back with you, but still, as much as his touch and his voice was incredibly tempting, tonight didn't feel the night.

"i promise, next time." you flush. and he chuckles into your ear before pulling away, giving your thigh a quick squeeze. "anyway," you start, looking around at his friends who are all around your table, laughing and joking with each other. "imagine what this lot would say if we ran off together."

jason chuckles, picking up his drink. "i dont care, as long as its you im running off with."

your phone pings at exactly the wrong time. your heart swells. you almost want to curse yourself for texting him. asking him to pick you up. theres a light blush against your cheeks and you're about to say something when one of his friends slaps his shoulder, leaning forward and passing another drink forward. you take your chance to look at your phone, seeing his name and letting out a smile.

"i didn't get you one, y/n." your head whips up. "unless you've decided to stay?"

you smile at jasons friend, before you grab your bag from the arm of your chair.

"my ride just got here, but thank you." you smile, starting to stand up. jason follows suit, and you give him a quick look before turning to his friends. you thank them all for a wonderful night, and to your surprise every single one of them stands up to give you a hug. it takes a while, all 5 boys pulling you in and wishing to see you soon, but when you finally spin back to jason, he's made his way to the bar and is leaning against it, staring at you deeply. you walk your way over, and your hands find his neck immediately.

"im busy for the next few days," he starts, and you nod. "but can i call you tomorrow? and the day after that? and then the day after that?"

you laugh, dropping your head down before looking back at him. "of course."

he smiles, leaning forward to brush his lips to yours and you accept gratefully. "let me walk you out." he says, and your heart rate speeds slightly, but you give him a smile.

"im fine, babe. go enjoy yourself."

he's hesitant, but he smiles before leaning forward to drop another kiss."let me know when you're home safe, please." he whispers into your lips.

"of course" you whisper back, and then you give him a final peck before squeezing his arm slightly, and walking away. a laugh escapes you as you hear his table of friends cheer at him as he walks back, and it takes everything in you not to turn around and stare at him one last time.

and yet, the minute you get outside and are greeted by your best friend, you heart leaps a little.

"your carriage awaits" he speaks, leant against the wall. your smile falters as you role your eyes.

"dont gloat" you say, and he laughs, pushing himself off the wall and grabbing you into a hug. your arms are around his back instantly as you give him a squeeze.

"you absolutely stink of vodka" he says into your ear, and you pull away, pushing him away. he laughs, grabbing his car keys from his pocket. "and mr lover boy hasn't even walked you out?"

you roll your eyes again, but grab his wrist for support. "his name is jason. and no. i told him to stay inside."

"such a gentleman" chris mutters, grabbing your arm as you walk towards the car.

"i'll go back inside if you can't be nice." you say, coming to a stand still.

your best friends had become more open over the last few days to your relationship, or not relationship, with jason. but chris still stuck on the fence. disengaging when conversation arose, changing the subject at every possible moment too without it coming across as rude. you had sighed just the night before as you lay in bed with nick, turning over to him and asking him WHY chris was so cold with any man you entered into your life. nick had been hesitant, and he had looked at you like he didn't know what to say for right or wrong, but he had pulled you into a hug and told you to have fun, regardless of what his brother thought.

chris stopped walking too, but a laugh escaped his lips as he slings his arm over your shoulder.

"im only joking, come on, lets get you food."

and so you did. the moment you got in the car and chris played your favourite playlist, you felt the most relaxed you had had all evening. you were drunk, so incredibly drunk, and for some reason chris' energy and presence had bought it out in you. but he took it in his stride. he laughed with you, he payed for your food without question and he sang along to all your favourite songs with you.

when he finally pulled up, at his and the boys house you noticed, you grabbed your phone out of your bag and pinged jason a message to let him know you were home safely, and thanked him again for a great night. when you put your phone back away, chris was staring at you intensely.

"what?" you laugh, grabbing your drink from the cup holder at the side of you. the full sugar pepsi after copious amounts of wine was much welcomed.

chris stared at you, but shrugged as he turned to get out the car. the moment long forgotten when your phone pinged again. you got out of the car, drink in hand and your heart jumped a little when you saw jasons message, telling you he would call you in the morning. placing your phone back in your bag, you make your way towards chris.

"i don't remember asking you to bring me back here" you joke, slipping your hand into his. he looked down at your hands before he interlocked them, grabbing your closer.

"i don't remember you telling me to take you home, either." he jokes. you laugh.

"if you want to spend more time with me, you only have to ask." you say back, hitting his shoulder with yours.

but chris says nothing as you walk into their house, chaos descending the minute nick hears your heels on the floor. you're pulled from chris' arms immedately, nick spinning you round and asking you for every single little detail possible about the night. you were a smirking giddy mess by the time you were done, explaining all the times jason had squeezed your thighs under the table, the kisses behind your ear. nick had listened and gasped in all the right places, but it was matt who bought you back to earth as he flung himself down on the couch after listening from the kitchen.

"so, why the fuck are you here and not at his house?"

you whip your head to him immediately, but it takes you a second. because you're not sure. your eyes scan to chris, and he's staring at you again, exactly how he did in the car. it isn't lost on you that you can't seem to tear your eyes away from him.

"does it fucking matter, matt?" nick chimes, and your trance is broken as you turn around to nick. you smile, internally thanking him for speaking out. you hear matt chuckle behind you, and then nick is on his feet.

"are you staying the night? fuck why am i even asking, you're absolutely staying the night. i have some of your make up wipes in my bathroom. matt, did you throw her stuff from last night into the laundry?"

you spin round to matt, and he stand immediately. "yeah, let me get them."

you smile. "can i borrow a hoodie?"

matt rolls his eyes, but gives you a grin afterwards. you laugh, sinking back into the couch, flinging your heels off onto the floor and pulling your knees into your chest. but when the room becomes silent, matt and nick in other rooms, chris' voice pops up.

"why did you?"

you look to him immediately. you screw your eyebrows. "huh?"

"why did you? come back here? why didn't you stay and end the night with him"

"i-"

he doesn't let you answer.

"what was your excuse for coming home?"

you gulp. "i said i was tired."

"and who did you tell him was giving you a ride?"

you pause. "i told him i called an uber."

he stares at you for what feels like an eternity, before he stands up.

"i cant do this."

"chris-"

but he's off down the stairs to his room before you can say something else.

[astermagnolia]

Danny and Peter run into Jason: one-shot based on my most recent post

\/\/\/\/

Danny sighed as he shivered, still trying to get used to the spider-sense. From what he and Peter could tell it's barely only been a month since their situation and by far Spider sense has been the most annoying ability to try and learn.

"Peter tingle sucks, man," Danny mutters under his breath lest he get confused stares.

"Please for the love of everything, stop calling it peter tingle." Peter begged. If he was in control of his body at the moment he's sure his head would be on his head.

Danny's... housemate? Body...mate? Ew, no not that one. Headmate. Yeah, headmate, tried his best to explain how his sixth sense worked and how to deal with it but Danny still gets freaked out by it. Even when he's not driving the body

"Well, maybe if i didn't get tingles and shivers every time i would call it accordingly."

"It's just warning you of danger."

"Dude, we're currently staying in an area called crime alley near a place called the narrows in a city where crime is rampant. Gotham is ranked number one for 'one of the most crime-ridden cities'," Danny ranted, trying to keep his voice low and head down.

That little nugget of information was great to learn when they were doing their research. On top of learning that aliens exist and the police were corrupt. Though that last one wasn't too surprising.

"I mean, if we moved..."

"We barely have enough to feed ourselves plus your crazy metabolism. We can't move and then struggle to find a good place to bunk." Danny sighed again.

Trying to find a job is the most difficult thing at the moment considering they didn't have any ID—or any proof of existence in this world—and the fact they looked so young.

Danny took stealing from people, much to chagrin if Peter. He swore up and down he was stealing from wealthy people.

Peter on the other hand, when he was in control of his body, would try and fix anything from anyone within the area. People have started calling him 'tinkerer' and. Funnily enough, the guy who buys the stuff Danny steals calls him 'furittus'.

"Hey, look." Peter grabbed Danny's attention to what's ahead of them.

In front of them is a nice red motorcycle, the glossy coat reflecting the soft glow of the nighttime city. It was just sitting idle and unattended with no one near it or in sight.

Danny whistled appreciatively and walked closer to it. "D'ya recognize it, Pete?"

"Hmm, I think it's a Honda CB750 but...it looks heavily modified. That would cost a lot." Peter noted with a hint of admiration in his voice.

Danny hummed in thought, a playful smile growing in his face.

"Think i could steal it?" He joked.

"No!"

Danny blinked as the word practically echoed in his head, "Ow."

Pete huffed. If he had his body he would cross them and he would have a frown on his face. "Sorry for yelling, but also, that's a horrible idea. It would have cost the person so much time and money to modify the bike."

Danny rolled his eyes, "If it meant so much they wouldn't have left it here in the middle of crime alley. Just the wheels at least."

Peter sighed, "You don't even have any tools. How are you going to take the wheels?"

Danny smirked as he lifted their hand and turned it intangible. At least, that was the attempt. Their whole arm turned intangible instead.

Peter huffed, "I'll try to keep a lookout as you take the wheels then. Just like to say again, this is a horrible idea."

Danny grinned as he quietly worked to get the wheels off the rest of the bike and carefully left the bolts near the bike. It's the least he could. He has one wheel off when he pauses his work to get a better look at the engine.

"This sure is a nice looking bike." Danny says absentmindedly. "I'm really curious who it belongs to."

"I would say thank you but it looks like I'm being robbed." The gravel behind them makes noise.

Danny gasps—blue mist leaves his mouth—spinning to face the man behind them and some of the bolts fall out of his hand.

"i found it like that." Danny blurts out.

"Oh for the love–I can't even be mad, i would say the same thing. But i told you it would be a bad idea! Do you see him?? Look how huge he is!" peter ranted and hoped that Danny could feel him disappointment.

The man in front of them is huge, built like a tank and wearing a leather jacket. He has black hair with some of the front part being white. He definitely knows how to fight.

The man crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. "Why does this feel like deja vu?" He mutters. "Alright, wanna explain yourself, kid?"

Danny tries not to pout as he's called a kid, "...I just needed some money for some food." He says instead, hoping the man will take some pity.

The man stares at him, scrutinizing him and trying to come to some conclusion.

"What if he kills us?" Peter whispers.

"Welp, sorry pete but you would have erased yourself for nothing." Danny dryly replies as quiet as he can.

"Dude! Uncalled for."

"Alright, come on, follow me." The man suddenly says.

Danny jumps, his mouth dropping open "huh?"

"Food. I know a good place. The names' Jason, by the way." The man, Jason, simply says. He puts his hands in his jacket and starts heading in a direction.

"We're not actually following him, right? That's like, stranger danger one-oh-one and–nope we're just following him. That's great. That's cool. Lets just follow the guy we were stealing from."

Danny shrugged. "Free food."

Peter sighs and can only watch as Danny follows the guy. He would take control if he could, but if he forced a switch, that would only cause extreme dizziness, and it would be hard to explain their physical change, too. Peter and Danny still haven't figured out how to safely switch who is in control of the body. They just wake up and whoever is in control of the body is in control for the rest of the day, unless they're knocked out. Once, Danny was in control for three whole days.

Jason led to a fast food place called Bat Burger.

Once at the register, Jason tilted his head, "Order whatever you like and however much you like."

Danny and Peter are stunned hearing what Jason just said.

"However much I like?" Danny slowly repeated still trying to make sure he heard right.

"no way he's serious, right?"

"Yup, however much you like." Jason confirmed as he finished his order. "I'm using my old man's credit card anyway."

"...Alright, what do we want," Danny mutters and decides not to question Jason's odd decision. If they can order however much they want then they'll be able to take whatever they don't finish back to their little base, though he doubts they'll leave much.

Peter rattles off what his order, which Danny repeats and then he orders what he wants.

One thing Peter is grateful for, despite their circumstances, is that when he is stuck in his head, he can still taste whatever Danny is eating and vice versa.

The cashier stares in horror but then deeply sighs. They ring up their order, gives them their cups, and tell them to sit anywhere.

They grab their drinks and the two sit in the corner booth.

Jason places his hands on the table, "So, kid, what can i call ya?'

Danny jumps at the sudden question and stutters out, "Uh, our name is–I mean, my, my name is Danny."

The rest of the night goes by strangely but nicely. Jason asks one too many questions—about their non-existent home life which is nice—and that leads Danny to tell Jason to shove them, much to Peter's horror.

Danny does pretty much eat everything and as much as he wants to ask Jason about his strange ecto signature, he lets it go in favor of being left alone.

"That guy was weird. My spider sense didn't, you know, sense him." Peter admits, suspicion and weariness oozing from his voice.

Danny shrugs, "It's a big city. I doubt we'll run into him again."

\/\/\/\/

Peter luck strikes again.

If peter ever got the chance, he'll hang Danny up by his feet. He will find some way to neutralize his abilities and web him up.

"Hey, you're welcome to try, pete!" Danny says through his laughing.

In front of Peter is Jason, the man that fed them just a few weeks ago.

And is currently staring down at Peter with an intense stare.

Next to Jason is another man with tanned skin, black hair, and blue eyes. He's smiling widely, coming off as friendly.

"Do you two know each other?" The man tilted his head, trying to start a conversation.

"Uh, no, sorry, it's my first time seeing him...and you," Peter replies and looks down at the watches he's holding. He'd been told to fix them and the people they belonged too were loyal customers. He didn't think one of them would be Jason.

"Nah, i don't know 'em. He just looks familiar." Jason replies. He squints, scowling in thought. "You don't happen to have a twin do you? One with Black hair and blue eyes."

Peter wants to shrivel up and die.

Danny definitely isn't helping as he wheezes, laughing at Peter's misfortune.

Danny, what do I say?!

"Tell them yes and that we've been separated and you have been living with your uncle!"

By some miracle, Peter was able to sell his grief and ask Jason if he'd seen him. He's not sure how he did it since his lying pretty subpar most days. He was still baffled about lying to Aunt May for as long as he did.

"Oh, that's so sad," The man, Dick Grayson, stated with empathy in his eyes. "Why don't you file a missing person report? They could help..." He weakly says.

Jason sighs, placing a hand on his forehead. "Dick i swear to god..."

Peter stares baffled. Did this man not know Gotham police? How does he explain why going to the police is not a good idea, for one, the corruption, and two because Danny—by extension Peter as well—do not exist. So he cant file a missing person report.

"ACAB, bitch!"

"ACAB, bitch!" Peter blurts out the only thing in his mind and slaps a hand over his mouth. Danny's loud voice was the only thing on his mind. He couldn't think of anything else.

Danny was laughing hysterically about the situation Peter found himself in.

Dicks mouth dropped open, shocked by the sudden exclaim.

Jason begins to snicker which turns into a full blown belly aching laughter. He leaned on the counter and slapped Dick's shoulder.

"He–HAHAHH! Ohhh man. Kid I just met, you're incredible. heehe–" Jason erupted into another fit of laughter.

Peter stands in embarrassment and tired of this whole thing. He just wants the world to open up and swallow him. Saves him from the embarrassment.

"You're stuck with me Peter, whether you like it or not!" Danny exclaims through laughter.

At the very least, Peter isn't alone.

\/\/\/\/\/

This is all i had running through my head. I cannot promise any part 2 or anything

Some notes:

Jason's personal bike and red hood bike are different. And obviously hard to find an exact model since they change with different iterations and, ya know, trademark law and all. The bike i mentioned is one iteration that seemed the most obvious since someone was able to name it.

I think the earliest spiderman gave peter Parker a bike. I haven't seen anyone put an exact name on it but, funnily enough, its also a Honda

I hope I did the characters justice <3

[rekino2114]

How about 3 with fem kaiser and male reader

I imagine she'd give you a blue rose bouquet

Fem!kaiser giving you a bouquet and chocolate

Valentine's prompt #3

Prompts list

Pairing:fem!Michael kaiser x male reader

A/n:my first Valentine's Day post, and it's with one of my favorite characters to write for

"I-i'm sorry ma'am but we don't carry-"

"Tch"

Kaiser didn't even let the florist finish her sentence, a sentence that she had heard way too many times in a day. She hated when people repeated things to her, especially if it was something she didn't want to hear

"I should have expected that, this place is so trashy anyway"

The woman she was speaking to wanted to say something, but she knew better than to talk back to one of germany's most famous and important football players and people in general which was currently looking at her like she could buy this entire store 5 times and still have enough money to afford the incredibly expensive box of chocolates she was holding, which was actually very true

Kaiser sighed and simply walked outside of the store, not saying anything else. She sat on a bench inside of the mall she was in and ran a hand through her hair sighing even more heavily, she knew she fucked up and this was all just her fault.

She knew she shouldn't have waited until the last day to try to get the bouquet, but she was overconfident just like she was in football except that there her skills backed her confidence up but in this occasion there was no skill she could make use of, just the unpredictable mechanism of luck.

Unlike most holidays (Christmas especially), Michelle actually likes Valentine's day, sure it's cheesy and corny, but she can't deny that ever since she started dating you, she has become a bit cheesy and corny herself, giving you a blue rose bouquet every month with a note entitled to "my emperor💙" constantly showering you in praise and compliments and still using pick up lines even after years of dating but that's what feeling love for the first time ever does to a person. Kaiser loved you, and you deserved nothing short of perfection....which was exactly why she was disappointed that she couldn't give it to you today.

Her usual blue rose supplier had gotten sick and couldn't do his job. She was about to tell him to get up and do it anyway since she would still play a match while sick, but she didn't want to be that mean on a day about love so she just hung up without saying anything and went to look for blue roses in basically all of Munich's flower shops.

Of course, she knew that blue roses were very rare and literally unobtainable in nature. That's the whole reason why she got the tattoo in the first place, but what else could she have done? Give you normal roses? As if! She was the blue rose empress, that was literally her symbol. She wanted to get you blue roses so that every time you looked at them, you would think of her.

Her thoughts were interrupted by her phone ringing. When she took it out of her pocket, she was relieved to see it was you calling her and not someone else to bother her even more.

"Hello, what is it schatz?"

"Hi Michelle, noa wanted me to ask you why you didn't come at practice today"

"Oh, I'm just shopping"

".....really, for what? You usually just send ness to do it or go with me"

".......well-"

"Speaking of ness, where is he? He didn't come either"

"Yeah......i sent him to buy something too"

"So.....you two are trying to buy the same thing but you're not together?"

"......yeah"

"....it must be important"

"It is"

"I see well I'll just tell noa you're busy and not bother you anymore, love you bye"

"Thanks, love you too"

The conversation kaiser had just finished made her feel even more guilty. You were just so sweet and perfect. The roses and chocolates you had given her this morning had already proven it to her among the mountains of other things you did for her.

You knew she didn't like receiving gifts, that she genuinely wouldn't have known how to react, but you still did it, simply telling her that it was just because of tradition and she didn't have to get you anything, but she wanted to, she wanted to get those damn blue roses.

She gritted her teeth as her anger rose. Why today of all days? Somehow, not being able to give you what you deserved felt even worse than getting a goal blocked by isagi

*ring ring*

"What is it?"

This time kaiser didn't even try to hide her frustration at however was on the other side of the phone

"K-kaiser, I found the roses"

"Finally! Where are they?"

"I-it's just-"

"Listen ness, I don't care what's happening there, I'll get the roses even if I have to kill someone to have them"

"But it's 800 euros for a bouquet"

"......ok and?"

"Isn't that......super expensive?"

"Yes and wildly overpriced. Like i told you, I'm getting those roses no matter what ,plus it's not actually that much for me, I can make that back in a match if I play well, and I always do"

"........o-ok"

After going to get the roses, kaiser and Ness went back to the bastard münchen building and were greeted by noa scolding them for not attending practice which Michelle mostly ignored as she told the magician to tell you to come to her room later.

"Hey babe, what-"

You gasped as the first thing you saw when you opened the door was kaiser holding a blue rose bouquet, smiling at you

"Happy valentine's day schatz"

"You didn't have to do this you know?"

"Yes, but I wanted to. You do so much for me. I would have felt terrible not giving you anything back"

She kissed you, wrapping her arms around you and guiding you to her large bed, where she placed the bouquet and opened the chocolate box

"Want some?"

The chocolates all looked amazing....and expensive, some of them had golden wrappers or phrases like I love you written on the chocolates themselves

"How much did this cost?"

"Please schatz don't worry about that"

She grabbed one of the chocolates with her fingers and held it out to you

"Do you need me to feed it to you~"

"I certainly wouldn't complain about that"

You opened your mouth as kaiser fed you the chocolates, you swallowed it, and your eyes lit up at how tasty it was

"So good!"

"Of course, I made sure they were all your favorite flavors. My emperor only deserves the best"

"What did i do to deserve you?"

"Just.....loving me"

Kaiser got close to you once again and hugged you. You hugged back as you let yourself fall on the bed with her on top of you. She kissed you passionately another time and continued kissing your face, leaving blue lipstick marks on it

"I love you so much schatz"

"Me too, I love you so so much"

Kaiser's smile widened as she moved to your right, hugging you even tighter. You were now fully cuddling on the bed

"Should I add the bouquet to the ones you always give me"

"If you want, I'd say this one is special, though. It cost me a lot, both in money and effort"

"Awww and you still brought it for me, you're so sweet"

"It's nothing, I'd do anything for you"

With those final words, kaiser kissed your forehead as you two continued to cuddle in silence. Her love warmed you up as you felt her heartbeat, which you knew was beating for you, the only person who showed kaiser love, her boyfriend, teammate, emperor, soulmate and now her valentine.

[witless-winion1]

My thoughts on the paralyzed!Polites AU

(Which I really should do more research on; inspired by this)

Odysseus cries when Polites first wakes up

Eurylochus almost cries. Instead just let’s out a very shaky, relieved sigh and tells his friend “I’m glad you’re back”

his vision is messed with in that classic “Eye for an eye” vibe

His left arm is broken and yet he still insists on greeting the world with open arms

“Don’t you mean open arm?”

“You hush, Perimedes.”

So much survivor’s guilt but he’s very thankful to be alive and honors his fallen friends with Ody and everyone else

He basically can’t walk without help

Odysseus carves him a cane himself

It has a bunch of super cool details, including a winion

Polites adores it

(perhaps they go back to the Lotus Eater island and kidnap a winion for Polites? Like a comfort animal. Give Polites, my Disney Princess Pancake, a familiar plz)

But Polites needs a lot of help with things that require both arms or both legs or gods forbid all four

one dumbass numbnuts comments “would’ve been kinder to let him die” under his breath after Polites wakes up

Captain nearly throws him overboard

obviously

“My best friend would be delighted to live life in whatever form it came to him! You shut your fucking mouth and if I ever hear you ask such wretched nonsense again I’m going to put you on latrine duty for a month, am I understood?”

Eurylochus has to hold him back during this

Eurylochus also immediately assumes position of bodyguard of Polites.

He and Odysseus soon begin fighting over this job

they decide to share custody

(eventually)

OPEN ARMS REPRISES BUT HES ACTUALLY ALIVE!!!!

plot? Oh yeah plot

lmao what plot

after the Cyclopes passes out Ody is too busy making sure his friend is okay (which he is not). He gets somebody to check the other smashees and then stays by Poli’s side (no, he don’t give a shit that he’s captain, you guys go stab his eye, he’s asleep it’s not that fucking hard)

Odysseus carries Polites when the Cyclopes wakes up

he’s too busy thinking about getting him back to the ship and calling the best doctors from the 12 ships so he tells everyone to grab the sheep and HUSTLE

Athena grabs him and starts with her “HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN THE LESSONS I TAUGHT YOU? HE’S STILL A THRE-”

“ATHENA IM BUSY RN WE CAN TALK LATER”

“BUT HE’S STILL ALIVE-”

“WE’RE LEAVING BRO! HE’S NOT GONNA FUCKING SWIM AFTER US!”

they’re not on best terms for a while after that but they still reconcile after

then they get home! Whoop de do, congrant, 99.7777777778% of the canon plot avoided

when they get home and our sunshine is actually properly long-term treated, Odysseus and Telemachus’s first big father-son bonding project is to make Polites’ house more accessible for him

and Telemachus fucking loves Polites. Best Uncle Award. They vibe so hard that Odysseus cries

he almost cries when Penelope starts weaving clothes that are easier for his friend to wear. He’s a tiinnyyy bit jealous but he’s still so happy. And Penelope noticed and weaves her dear husband some clothes too, all his old ones are stinky asf

Eurylochus and all Poli’s friends from the ship still visit regularly. It’s just a big happy family

and nobody dies, not even Nobody

(except for those other guys from the Cyclopes cave but this ain’t about them)

[trashytracktales]

k i need to share this theory cause grrr there’s something about lando that actually gives me a little bit of a ick and i need to share. since we’re all friends right? 🫠

it’s his house.

NO WALK WITH ME. Because i’m speaking from what we’ve seen from the quadrant videos and streams. imagine you’ve been dating a few weeks it’s all new and he brings you to his house for the first time. You walk him hoping to get a bit of spice time sexy time. chill around cuddle, you know.

and there’s him everywhere.

NO SERIOUSLY.

he has his helmets EVERYWHERE, paintings about him EVERYWHERE, trophies EVERYWHERE, pictures EVERYWHERE. memorabilia EVERYWHERE.

but to me it’s mostly the paintings, like i get its a nice thing to keep them and he’s super cute because they are probably fan made or something but he’s got SEVERAL in every room. about him. about him in the car. about him on the podiums.

is it just me or it’s a red flag? I don’t know man sounds like boy’s got an ego yeah?

(lando norris pls invite me to your house i can cook i can clean)

Oui, bestie. I get what you’re saying. HOWEVER, I think it depends a lot on how you look at it. Personally, I don’t mind the helmets or trophies and all that stuff. That’s literally his life’s work on display, and I think it’s kind of beautiful. Like, imagine grinding your whole life for something and then feeling weird about celebrating it in your OWN HOME?? AW HELL NAH. He earned that.

And also, man lives alone. He could paint the walls mcl papaya if he wanted, no one’s stopping him ✌🏻😗

Now, the paintings... I hear you, it can get really crowded. If every square inch of his house is covered in artistic tributes to himself, including one hung strategically above the toilet, then yeah, I might PAUSE for a second. I doubt that’s the case, but I need to see for myself hehe 😁

*me outside his building, begging to let me see the inside of his bathroom

Anyway, back to this, the fact that he keeps and cherishes most of them is so sweet 🥺🤍. That means every fan-made painting and every little gift someone took the time to create, actually means something to him.

If he invites you into that space, I think it’s because he trusts you enough to show you the most personal, unfiltered version of himself. And honestly, being surrounded by little pieces of him everywhere you look would probably be the last of your worries, because why pay attention to that when he’s RIGHT THERE 👀

So, I wouldn’t call it a red flag, I’d call it a very human thing. My own place is full of things I’ve achieved, memories I made along the way, and hobbies that make me me. If anything, this is how you’d really get to know him, beyond just the funny guy on mcl’s yt channel, the unhinged dude on twitch, or the driver on your screen.

Don’t get me wrong, he definitely has an ego, but it’s not from the fact that his face is on everything or that his name is everywhere. That’s just a side effect of his job. His ego comes from... other places. But that’s a different conversation ;)

I’m sure that if you end up moving in together, he’s definitely going to make room for your personality too. But until then? Let him have his little Lando museum.

[benzendrine-nosebleed]

"Sing Me To Sleep."

Guys!! I wrote a one shot based on Schlatt's most recent Drunk Driving stream after hearing him sing bits and pieces. I haven't proof read this (mostly because I'm not in any sober editing mood to) but I wanted to share this quick little bit.

1111 Words, Fluff, Schlatt X Reader

“I love hearing you sing like that,” I spoke softly. Jay was taking a quick break from his drunk driving stream, moving from his office to the kitchen. He has been streaming for a few hours now, and I could smell herbal liqueur on his breath. He grazed past, marching straight to the refrigerator with padded “thuds” from his socked feet.

“Do ya?” Schlatt asked, plucking a snacking cheese from the drawer inside. “Was it on stream?” He asked, unwrapping and popping creamy gouda snack cheese between his lips.

“Yeah, your mic picked it up, and I do, I love hearing you sing Jay, I wish you’d do it when you were sober. You have a wonderful voice,” I smiled, “I mean, your fans loved the album right? That should be enough motivation for you to sing like a canary,” I reached out to hold him for a second before he went back into his office. His mustache shifted on his upper lip as he chewed away. “Have fun with your stream Handsome, I’ve got to go to bed soon. I’m gonna get ready to crawl in. I’ll turn your side of the blanket on so when you make it back it’ll be warm for you too.”

Schlatt smiled and reached out, setting the wrapper on the counter beside me and wrapping his arms around me in a soft embrace. “Of course toots, I don’t know when I’ll end the stream, but I’ll be ready to climb into bed wit-cha.” He pulled me close into his arms, and planted a kiss on my cheek. “If I’m not back in there before you fall asleep, I hope you get some good rest in, I love ya,” he chirped. He pulled away, striding with a confidence he put up as a front for his audience. He entered the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

As he moved back into his room, I strolled across our home to the master bathroom and began drawing up a shower. I had a long enough day working at my own conventional job, that a Friday night was the night to relax. It was winter though, which meant I was in the busy season. I had to help shovel snow across the city, while in New York was enough of a task on its own, and brainstorm funding for public park systems and come up with plans for new designs. I climbed in, letting the hot water warm my bones, and I listened to Schlatt scornfully yell at his computer screen. As I continued, I could hear his agitation and laughs come in waves. He was thoroughly enjoying streaming again, and I was more than happy to let him enjoy it.

I climbed out of the shower and threw on some pajamas, in “Jay’s” style as I had begun to call it. I had taken one of his sweatshirts, which was baggy on myself, and threw it over a pair of my shorts. Once I finished brushing my teeth, I walked to the bedroom, careful as to not disturb Schlatt in his element on Twitch. His cats, Jambo and Soup, were sitting on the preheated bed, leaving me to shuffle in between them as not to disturb their own slumber. I plugged my phone in, and scrolled through TikTok until I began to drift off. I could feel myself nodding in between videos, so I made the choice to set my phone down, and sleep until I felt my lovely drunk boyfriend slam into bed.

This was somewhat of a common occurrence, since he used to film Chuckle Sandwich late into the evenings, we held this dynamic. I would end up in bed early, and sometimes I would wake up to him crawling in, or cuddling up to me. Sometimes I wouldn’t wake up at all and I’d hear my alarm, and feel Schlatt’s arm wrapped around my stomach anchoring me down. After the week that I had though, I was too tired to try and stay up until he was done streaming. I set my phone down on the bed next to me, and nodded off.

I woke up to Schlatt crawling into bed gently, not to disturb me. I didn’t know how much time had passed, but the room was still dark, and the lamp on my side of the bed was still on. He reached over me softly and shut it off, slowly letting the room fill in with a darkness. I didn’t move too much, it was more of my subconscious running my body at this point more than my own mental state. My eyes fluttered closed again, only squinting shut as soon as I felt his hand wrap around my shoulders. He shuffled closer to me, pulling the blanket from between us, and spooning into me.

“Sleep Warm, sleep tight, once you turn off the light,”

He softly lulled. His fingers slowly drifted into my hair, stroking through the strands softly. I recognized the song, being one Schlatt would throw on sometimes in the evening as the night came to a close. He slurred softly, his tone was indicative that he had been drinking most of the evening, but reached his most inebriated state before climbing into bed. He softly sang more, my mind came to life realizing he wasn’t just singing along to a song, he was singing to me.

“Let dreams within you dwell, sweet dreams of me my love,”

He continued softly, his fingernails tracing softly on my scalp. A smile had formed on my face hearing him singing so sweetly, softly into my ears as his lips pressed to the back of my neck with each verse. I still hadn’t moved an inch, hoping to not spook him out of continuing his warbling.

“Close your eyes now, and kiss me, and whisper you miss me,”

He pressed his lips to my neck with a soft kiss. His soft mustache tickled my neck, his fluffed brown hair pressed to mine, it was almost overwhelming how much I adored him like this. I scooted backwards into his body, pressing myself against him as his singing ended a moment later. His hand wandered under my sweatshirt, gently cupping my bare torso. I would normally feel a tad self conscious whenever he would do this, but tonight I basked in the feeling. His hand slid itself between the mattress and my skin, securing his place next to me.

“G’night sweetheart, I love you,” He whispered softly between another set of kisses on my neck.

“Good night Jay, I love you too,” I mumbled back, still flush from his lull.

[pushspacetocontinue]

"If you want to tell yourself that," Simon joked, before he looked over when he heard Bill coming in with Erica, "Looks like that job is done at least."

"It is a shame that ghosts apparently lower a value," Leofric said, "But I can see where you're coming from if we can't negotiate."

"Yeah, it does," Bill said, grinning, before he then laughed a little bit at Erica's comment, "Just a little extra thing to get their heads on straight."

"Smokey's going to love that," Travis said, as he then walked over and knelt down for Smokey to get on, "Want to try it, little buddy?"

"Sometimes physical pain can do things that not even psychological torment can accomplish," Antonio said, "Of course, the more extreme effects I'm using are going to be saved for those like Five and his mooks."

He wasn't ruling the Twins out of that entirely. Antonio had already decided that once their employment with Russell was over, they were fair game for their involvement.

"I have more important things to get out of him," Antonio said, "Now run along, and remember, the only reason you're still standing is because you're more useful with your brains intact."

Russell didn't bother to get up from the chair when the Twins returned, but he put on that mask of authoritative indifference. Bill however, grinned again and cheerfully sauntered his way over to them.

"Oh you've been seeing what the interrogator can do. I wonder if he could make it so if I bit you…" Bill made a show of pointing right at Timmy when he said that, before he pointed at Tommy, "You would feel it. Wouldn't that be funny?"

"Well, it would definitely fit the Tomax and Xamot thing..." Simon chimed in, "But we're meant to be leaving them alone and keeping them in top form."

"If, if I'm, if I'm not around," Russell said to the Twins then, "Then, then you're to, you're to listen and, and follow through with, with um, with anything my, my colleagues here ask, ask, ask of, ask of you, und-understood?"

"After all, Rook always needs an extra step to get on my level." Lucien rightfully received a light punch on the arm at that.

"I guess blackmailing works, but we should get the ghosts on the case." Rook said, "There's nothing like an active haunting to destroy the value of a property."

That was why it had never worked out with her father. Any efforts to be welcoming of the supernatural stopped when it started affecting his investment.

"Sounds fun!" Erica said. It seemed the car ride had been successful, as she dropped one of the seats on the floor.

Lucien moved out of the way before Smokey could fly through his chest, "What did you do?"

"Got Smokey a new seat!" the elf replied, placing her kitten down, "And stole some other bits. It should be harder to run away now."

Willow folded her hands behind her back, giving a small shrug. Her knowledge and experience didn't mean she had nothing left to learn. Her targets were going to adapt eventually, she needed to spruce up her arsenal.

Besides, it was common for siblings to bond over a common interest.

"Thank you." She managed a small smile of her own. "I prefer scrambling their devices. My daggers are ready, in any case."

Though it was unlikely they'd be needed. Ratchet dropped as soon as the noise registered, causing the Twins to poke at him.

"We were just getting started!"

"Figures."

But they weren't about to test their luck. Between Antonio and Willow, that room was starting to get a bit small for their liking.

"Maybe we'll break him next time."

"Let's go see what Coffee Boss is up to."

[starlost-maniac]

The Date

Warnings: mutual pining, perceived cheating, broken hearts

[9:45 am - Jisungie]

Y/nnnnnnie?!?!

[9:46 - Y/n]

Yes Ji?

[9:50 am - Jisungie]

You love me, right? 🥺

[9:50 am - Y/n]

Of course.

[9:51 am - Y/n]

Did you do something Jisung? 🤔

[9:53 am - Jisungie]

No, I've been good, I promise.

I just have a favor to ask, if that's ok?

[9:53 am - Y/n]

What's the favor?

[9:55 am - Jisungie]

One of my friends was going to go on a double date with Minho-hyung and I, but his date bailed on him, and you were the first person I thought of to ask, and I'm hoping you'd go on this date with our friend.

It's completely OK if you don't want to ❤️

[9:57 am - Y/n]

What's the date and time? If I'm not busy then I don't mind 😊

[9:57 am - Jisungie]

5pm, this Friday. It's at [restaurant name]

[9:58 am - Y/n]

Yeah, I don't have anything planned that day, I can go 😊

[9:58 am - Jisungie]

You're the absolute best, Y/nnie!! I'll take you out dress shopping, my treat! ❤️

[9:59 am - Y/n]

Aww, thank you Ji ❤️

——

"Y/NNNNIIIIIIEEEEE!!! I'm here to steal you for dress shopping!" Jisung called from the entryway of your apartment.

"I'm in my bedroom Ji!" You called back. "Just getting ready." You hear him shuffling down the hall towards your room. When you hear him stop in the doorway, you turn from your vanity and smile at him. He smiles back and walks over to your bed and plops down on it.

You and Jisung had been friends since childhood. You went through everything together, and were always there for the other. You were both there for relationships, breakups, moving, new jobs. You both had always been there for the other. When Jisung told you he met someone, you were so happy for him. You somehow haven't met Minho yet, as everytime you guys tried, something came up for one of you. Jisung has shown you pictures of Minho or of them together, and he has told you that he's shown pictures of you to him. Jisung also told you he's always talked highly of you.

"Will I finally get to meet the mysterious Minho that I've heard so much about?" You tease him before turning back to your vanity mirror. You decide to leave your hair down and pull it out of the ponytail you had it up in.

"I sure hope so. I'd love for my best friend and boyfriend to meet after so long. I think you guys would get along well honestly." He lays back on your bed.

You walk over to him and gently tap your foot against his. He looks up at you and smiles. He holds his arms open, wanting you to join him.

"Mandatory best friend cuddles first." He laughs out. You playfully roll your eyes as you climb in bed and into his arms. He holds you close to him and smiles. He breathes in deep and smells your shampoo and conditioner. "You smell nice today, Y/n." He buries his nose in your hair. "You smell like honey." His voice is a little muffled, and you giggle.

"I'm trying new hair products, that's probably it." He responds with an 'mm' before you pat his stomach softly. "Come on Ji, before you trap me here for the day." You laugh out. "You're taking me dress shopping for Friday." He groans. He holds you close, giving you a slight squeeze before letting you go. You sit up and fix your hair, not noticing him staring from his spot. You get up and he follows shortly after.

——

He takes you to a nice dress shop with many beautiful dresses. You look around with him, your fingers running along the dresses that sit on hangers as you walk past.

"You can pick out as many as you'd like, Y/n. Like I said, it's my treat." He smiles happily at you.

"You still don't have to, Ji." You look at him and he just waves his hand at you. You stick your tongue out at him and smile. You pick out a few dresses to try on and you both head to the dressing rooms, Jisung sitting on a couch nearby. You go in and try on a few dresses, coming out to show him every one. He compliments you in every one.

The last you come out in, is a black off the shoulder dress that comes just above your knees. It's form fitting, but loose enough to allow movement. It has a slight v cut in the front, showing off a bit of cleavage. When you come out to show Jisung, he looks up at you from his seat, eyes wide. He stands up and walks over to you.

"You look beautiful, Y/n." He speaks softly. He reaches a hand out but drops it back to his side. "I think this is perfect for Friday." He says and smiles. You notice the smile seems a little off, but you don't say anything. Maybe he received a text or a call that upset him.

You smile back softly and go back to the changing room, coming back out in your normal clothes. You put the dresses you didn't choose back, and go with Jisung up to the cashier to pay for the few you have.

——

The day of the date rolls around and you get a text from Jisung.

[3:30 pm Jisungie]

Y/nnie! Are you nervous? Excited? You're still coming, right? 🥺

[3:31 pm Y/n]

Of course I'm still coming, Ji. I wouldn't bail on you ❤️

[3:31 pm Jisungie]

You're the best Y/nnie. Have I ever told you how much I love you? 🥺🥺

[3:32 pm Y/n]

You could say it more 😋

[3:32 pm Jisungie]

Well, I love you so much Y/nnie. You're the greatest person I could ever have in my life

[3:33 pm Y/n]

Don't let Minho hear you say that lol.

But I'll see you there. I'm going to go shower and do something with my hair. ❤️

You set your phone down and gather your stuff for a shower.

————

Once done with your shower, you blowdry and curl your hair before carefully putting on the dress you and Jisung picked out. You decide on a pair or black heels and apply eyeshadow and red lipstick. Once you think you're ready, you grab your phone and purse and head out to go to the restaurant.

——

You enter the restaurant and tell the person at the front counter that you're here under Jisung's name. He nods and brings you to the table where Jisung and Minho sit, Minho seated facing away from you. You smile and wave at Jisung as you take a seat next to him.

"Y/n, this is my boyfriend, Minho-hyung." He directs you to the male sitting across from him. You follow where he's indicating and your eyes meet Minho's. His deep brown eyes captivate you. He looked like a perfectly carved statue. His sharp features were beautiful. "And Minho-hyung, this is my best friend since childhood, Y/n." Jisung puts his hand on your shoulder. Minho stands and puts his hand out and you reach out to his. He gently grabs your hand and kisses your fingers softly, his eyes never leaving yours.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Y/n." He says against your hand, holding your gaze. You feel a heat pool in your stomach, his eyes holding fire in them.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too, Minho," you say as he releases your hand. "Jisung told me so much about you. All good things, I promise." He chuckles quietly, smiling at you. You smile back at him, a soft laugh falls from your lips.

"You're more beautiful in person, Y/n. The photos Jisung has shown me don't do you justice." His smile turns to a small smirk. You feel heat rush along your cheeks and you thank him for his compliment.

A moment later, a tall man with curly hair and glasses dressed in a suit comes up to the table.

"I'm sorry I'm late." He says to the two men before looking at you, a gentle smile on his lips. "Hi, I'm friends with Jisung and Minho, my name is Lee." He puts his hand out, and you gently grab his. "You must be Y/n? Jisung said so many nice things about you."

You smile and nod. "Hi, yeah, I'm Y/n. It's nice to meet you, Lee." He takes his seat across from you. You observe his face as he talks. He's got a prominent beauty mark on his upper lip on otherwise fair skin. His glasses were thick framed and suited his face well. His dark curls sat just above the glasses.

You and the men talk for a few minutes before a waiter comes up to take your orders. He walks away once he gets your orders and returns shortly with your drinks and says the food will be out soon. You thank him as he walks off.

You look at Minho as you see he was looking your way, and smile. He blinks a few times before he smiles back. It's the only time you catch him staring at you during the date. The waiter comes back after a bit with your food and you all thank him.

Jisung gently nudges you with his shoulder, making you look at him. He smiles at you. "The dress looks so good on you, Y/nnie. We made a good choice."

You blush lightly at his compliment. "Thank you Sungie. You picked it out though. It was a good choice." You laugh out. You feel eyes on you for a brief moment, so you look at Minho and Lee, but Minho was taking a sip of his water, and Lee was eating.

You all talk over dinner. Talking about work and life. What hobbies you're into, if you have any pets. Just as you're all finishing your food, Lee asks for your number. You exchange numbers and smile at him. You try to pay for your portion of dinner but Lee stops you, insisting he pays for you. You try to insist back, but he's adamant, and you eventually let him, a playful pout on your lips.

"You're really cute when you pout, Y/n." Lee laughs softly.

At the end of dinner, you exchange a smile and part ways, saying goodbye to Minho and Jisung as well.

——

It's been a few weeks since that date, you and Lee texting almost every day. He eventually asks you out on another date and you agree. He wants to take you on a nice picnic at the Han River, since the summer weather is picking up, spring just ending.

You dress in a nice summer dress with flats and meet him at the park by the river. As you walk over to where you'll be meeting him, you see he's already got the picnic set up. You go over, smiling and say hi. He says hi back and asks if it's ok for a hug and you agree. He stands up and wraps his arms around your shoulders, yours around his waist and he gently squeezes you.

"Thank you for agreeing to another date, Y/n. I really enjoyed your company at the last one with Jisung and Minho." He says, releasing you from the hug.

"Of course. I had a great time and you were really sweet." You let him go and sit on the picnic blanket with him.

"I did have to ask Jisung for some of your favorite foods though, so I hope I did good." He laughs out as he opens the basket. He pulls out your favorite sandwiches, fruits, and even desserts. Your mouth falls open as you watch him. "I wanted to earn some brownie points with you." He laughs. "You seem like an amazing girl, and I'd like to spend more time with you, if that's ok?" He watches you with bright eyes. You smile and nod.

"Of course, and you don't need to try and earn brownie points," you laugh and place a hand on his arm. "Just be yourself with me and you'll be ok." You smile at him and take the sandwich he offers to you.

You eat and talk, both asking questions about the other, like school, about your hobbies, pets. He asks you how long you've known Jisung.

"I've known him for as long as I can remember. My dad passed away when I was little and my mom and I had to move cause she couldn't afford the house when he died. We moved to a small two bedroom apartment and Jisung was my neighbor. I was over at his place all the time when my mom had to work. We did everything together from there." You sigh, looking up to the sky, remembering your dad.

"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, Y/n." He places his hands on yours and squeezes softly.

You smile a little at him. "No, you're ok. You didn't make me uncomfortable at all. Now, how do you know Ji?" You take a bite of a strawberry.

"I met him in college actually. We had some classes together."

"I'm surprised I never saw you. We went to the same college too." You ponder.

"Life is honestly strange like that. I never saw you either." You both laugh.

You both stay until the sun starts to lower and you help him pack everything up and he walks you to your car. You thank him for a lovely date and he asks to hug you again and you do.

"I hope to see you again Y/n." He smiles as you get in your car. He waves and walks off to go to his.

Once you get home, you check your phone and see you had a text from Jisung.

[10:05 pm - Jisungie]

Did you have fun on your date today? We saw you at the Han river.

[10:05 pm - Y/n]

I had a great time, Ji.

Were you stalking me lol

[10:06 pm - Jisungie]

👀 👀

But no lol we just happened to be there.

[10:08 pm - Jisungie]

I'm glad you're having a good time with him though.

He's a good guy

[10:10 pm - Y/n]

He is. Thank you for introducing me to him. I'm not sure where this will go, or if it will actually turn into anything, but we'll see. He's been really sweet :)

[10:11 pm - Jisungie]

Of course, Y/n.

Minho wanted to say good night lol

[10:13 pm - Jisungie]

*photo*

[Jisung and Minho are cuddled together in bed, Jisung's head on Minho's chest, arm stretched out to take the picture]

[10:15 pm Y/n]

Aww, look at you two all cuddled up. You look comfy lol

But you two have a good night as well 😊

[10:20 pm - Jisungie]

Love you Y/n

[10:20 pm - Y/n]

Love you too Sungie ❤️

——

You continued to go out with Lee for nearly a year, just casual dates, nothing too exciting, except when he took you to Lotte World and made you ride the viking ship. You don't do well with heights, so you were holding onto him pretty tight. You and Lee never labeled your relationship as more than just friends going on dates.

Minho and Jisung occasionally saw you around with Lee, and you would sometimes see a look on Minho's face, but you couldn't place what it was and he'd steel his face before you could try and figure it out. You didn't worry too much about it, but it still sat at the back of your mind.

Jisung and Minho still talked to you, obviously, Jisung being the one who texted you more often as he's your best friend.

——

[12:45 pm - Lee]

Hi Y/n 😊 I wanted to know if you wanted to go on another double date with Jisung and Minho. I haven't seen them much since the last double date, and I'd love to see all of my favorite people.

[12:46 pm - Y/N]

Of course! I'd love to go on another double date with you and the guys. Did you already ask them?

[12:46 pm - Lee]

I did, and they said as long as you were up for it 😊 I'm thinking this Saturday, 5pm?

[12:50 pm - Y/n]

Sounds good!

[12:50 pm - Lee]

Great! I'll pick you up and the guys. Date is my treat. I'll see you then 😉

——

Saturday rolls around and Lee texts you, saying that he's downstairs. He sat outside your building in his car. Minho and Jisung were sitting in the back together. You come downstairs, hair in a half ponytail, bangs slightly curled to be out of your eyes. You had sparkly purple eyeshadow on, with dark violet lipstick. Your outfit was an open back, dark purple and black dress that hugged your curves beautifully.

Lee got out of the car quickly and went around to open the passenger door for you. You got in the car, thanking him with a smile. He shut it behind you once you were in. You turn around a bit and greet the boys. Jisungs eyes were a little wide and he slowly licked his lips before he greeted you. Minho giving you a nod. Lee gets back in the driver seat.

"H-hi Y/nnie. You look amazing tonight." Jisung's eyes flick to your lips for a second before going back to your eyes, which you missed as the inside of the car was dark.

"You do look stunning, Y/n." Minho watches you, a look in his eyes that looks like he wants to eat you alive. Your eyes break away from him when Lee speaks up.

"Don't be flirting with my date, guys." He teases, looking in the rear view mirror. You look back in time to see Minho's jaw tick, before turning around and buckling in. Thankfully it was dark in the car, so no one could see your cheeks were flushed a bit. Lee starts the car back up and drives towards the restaurant. He reached over his middle console to gently hold your hand.

Behind you, Minho saw, clenching his jaw. Jisung looked at him and tried to calm him down, rubbing his arm softly. Minho closed his eyes and took a deep breath, calming himself down. Jisung holds his hand, intertwining their finger, looking up at him worried. Minho looks at Jisung and gives him a soft, gentle smile, telling the younger he's ok.

When you get to the restaurant, you all get out and walk inside, Lee's arm around your waist, his hand on your hip. He leads you inside and the waiter takes you to your booth. The booth is a small, circular table for smaller parties. Lee lets you in first, sitting towards the middle with him sliding in next to you, on your left. Minho and Jisung slide in on the other side, Jisung directly to your right, Minho beside him.

"Thank you guys for agreeing to come, I know we haven't seen each other much since Y/n and I started hanging out, and I wanted to see you guys again." Lee smiles at the boys.

"Of course. We're happy to see Y/nnie happy. And we wanted to see you again. These months felt a lot longer without you." Jisung chuckles out.

You all talk about how it's been going, Minho and Jisung spending time with friends and family, doing regular couple stuff. Lee worked most of the week, and you and he volunteered at an animal rescue center on the weekends, you were especially fond of the cats and kittens. You noticed Minho perked up at that. Otherwise you two were hanging out at your place or his, just watching movies or playing games when you had the time between working and volunteer work.

The waiter returns to take your food and drink orders, writing them down and leaving, returning not long after with your drinks and a bottle of champagne on the house. Lee thanks him and he leaves again.

"So you've just been hanging out? Nothing..too exciting?" Jisung looks at you, eyes a little wide.

Lee puts his hand on your thigh as you respond, the boys take notice. "Mm, he did take me to Lotte World and took me on the viking ship ride and I had to hold onto him cause I was so scared of the height." You laugh, remembering it. "Other than that, nothing too crazy."

Jisung nods and he puts his hand on Minho's when he feels him tense up beside him. The waiter brings your food out while you're all talking and the boys thank him. You all eat and talk, mostly you and Jisung sharing stories you remember from childhood.

When it comes time to pay, Lee pays for the whole meal, reminding you all he said it was on him. You smile and thank him for the meal before you all shuffle back out to his car, the boys sliding in the back again as Lee holds your door open again. He shuts it once you're in and gets in himself. He starts the car and puts his hand on your thigh again and gently squeezes.

You hear a grunt from the back seat and you turn your head, but the boys were looking out the window. You turn your head back to look ahead of you. You and Lee quietly talk when he asks you a question. He drives you back to your apartment and walks you up to the door of the complex. Minho and Jisung sit in the car and watch you. You thank him again for dinner tonight, smiling. He smiles back and says it's not an issue. He leans forward and kisses your cheek.

You were taken aback a bit, but smiled at him and wished him a good night before going inside. Lee waits while he makes sure you make it into the building. He walks back down to his car and gets in the driver's seat.

"Thanks again for introducing Y/n to me. It's been really fun hanging out with her." Lee says as he buckles in. He drives the two home and drops them off.

——

You've been hanging out with Lee for a year now, the two of you growing close. You hung out with Jisung and Minho together.

You're at Jisung's place, sitting on his small couch by the arm, Minho sitting at the other. You were all watching a movie, Jisung complaining that there were no more drinks and snacks.

"I'll be right back. I need more booze." He complains. He gets up and grabs his coat and wallet, leaning over to peck Minho on the lips before stepping out the door. Minho watches his boyfriend leave before turning his gaze back to you.

"So, how are the dates with Lee? We haven't gotten to see you much lately." He says, watching you. You turn in your seat so you're facing Minho, leaning against the back cushions.

"They're going really well. I think he's going to ask me out soon. He asked me to go out to a movie and dinner this weekend." You say, laying your head on the cushion. Minho nods and is silent for a few minutes. He turns his gaze to the paused movie on the screen before turning back to you.

"Don't go on the date.." he mumbles. You furrow your brows when you look at him.

Lifting your head off the couch, you ask, "why not?" He purses his lips, not wanting to answer. "Is there something about Lee that I should know about? Something that you want to protect me from?" He still doesn't answer and you sigh softly.

You rub your face a little and close your eyes. "You can't just tell me not to go on a date with someone and not give me a rea—" Your sentence was cut off when you felt a pair of lips pressed against yours. Your eyes shoot open the same time you hear the front door open. You hear Jisung's voice a moment later.

"Oh."

You pull back from Minho. Horrified that he just did that. Why would he do that? You stand up and grab your things, rushing past Jisung and out the door.

"Wait! Y/nnie!" Jisung tried to call out for you, but you were already on the elevator. You cover your mouth with your hand, tears starting to form in your eyes. Why would Minho kiss you? He just cheated on Jisung, on your best friend. You don't know how you're going to face either of them now. You text Lee saying you're going to have to raincheck the date this Saturday and he says that's perfectly fine.

You make it back to your apartment. As soon as the door is shut behind you, the tears spill over and you're sobbing. You felt so guilty for Minho kissing you. You think you got in between their relationship. You end up not answering either of their texts for a while, just making yourself busy with work or volunteer work at the shelter.

It's been almost three months since you last spoke to either of them, not sure how to confront your friend or his boyfriend about what happened. You get home late one day, and find a sticky note on your door that reads:

'We need to talk, please. -Ji'

You sigh and grab the note, opening the door to your apartment. You step in and drop off your things. You pull out your phone as you walk to your room. You open the texts, seeing all the texts from him, ranging from 'please talk to us', 'we miss you', 'let us explain'. The last one he sent you just last week broke your heart.

[July xx, 20xx 10:45pm]

'Y/nnie…please talk to me..I miss my best friend. I haven't stopped crying since you ran out of my apartment. I don't want to lose you…please, Y/nnie…love you, ji..'

You started sobbing again and texted him.

[9:15pm - Y/n]

Ji..?

[10:30pm - Jisungie]

Y/N???

[10:31pm - Y/n]

It's me. I…

I'm sorry, Ji.

[10:32pm - Y/n]

I didn't mean to get between you and Minho. I didn't mean for him to kiss me..it was so sudden, and I still feel so guilty..

[10:35pm - Jisungie]

Y/n..can I please come over to talk?

[10:36pm - Y/n]

I..I don't think I can see Minho if you're still with him..

[10:36pm - Jisungie]

That's fine, Y/n. Minho doesn't have to be there. I'll come over now?

[10:40pm - Y/n]

That's fine

It's 11pm by the time Jisung makes it to your apartment. He knocks softly and you open the door, letting him inside. When he looks at you, his eyes are all red, and he's been letting his facial hair grow out.

"Ji..I'm so sorry again..I do—" he cuts you off with a tight hug, sobbing into your shoulder. You hug him back, trying—unsuccessfully—to hold back your tears. After you both calmed down and moved to your living room, you two finally talked.

"Y/nnie..Minho didn't cheat on me when he kissed you." He sniffles, wiping his nose with a tissue. He looks at you, eyes red and puffy from the long crying session you both had.

"What do you mean, Ji?" You pat at your sore eyes with the back of your hand.

"Y/nnie..I love you so much, but you are so oblivious." He chuckles softly, sniffling again.

"Hey.." you whine and pout.

"Y/n. Minho likes you. I like you. Fuck, I love you. Ever since we were little. I've had the biggest crush on you." He leans against your couch, hiccuping a little as he tries not to sob again. You stare at him with wide eyes as another tear slips down your cheek.

"You what?" You whisper.

"I never said anything cause one of us was always in a relationship. We were never single at the same time and then I met Minho." He watches you for a beat. "When I showed Minho your pictures, he's been talking about you non-stop. When he saw you at the restaurant, he was awestruck. He was jealous of Lee, but he didn't want to interfere. Minho is the one who suggested we bring you in."

"But you sounded so upset when you got back from the store." Your voice was almost a whisper.

"I mean, I was upset. He got to kiss you before I did!" It was his turn to pout. "I liked you for longer and he got to kiss you first." You can't help but laugh. "And now you're laughing at me." He pouts more.

"Jisung, can you ask Minho to come over? I think we need to all have a talk." You pat your eyes again.

——

Minho was now sitting in your living room between you and Jisung on the couch. Minho didn't look as disheveled as Jisung did, but he looked tired.

"Minho, I just want to start by saying how sorry I am.." you start but he holds up his hands.

"I should be the one to apologize. I kissed you without your permission, and I didnt communicate very well." He watches you, sadness in his eyes. "I'd understand if you wouldn't want to talk to me anymore." His gaze falls to his lap.

"No, Minho. I didn't know that you both liked me. I've had the biggest crush on Jisung since we were kids." You laugh softly. He looks back up at you, his eyes still sad. Reaching forward, you gently grab his hands and hold them in yours. "I'm not going to cut you off, I promise." You give him a gentle smile. Your face wasn't as red and puffy as earlier, thankfully. He nods a little.

"Would you…would you still join us? You obviously don't have to.." he mumbles, eyes a little hopeful.

"I mean, I can't say I've thought of dating you both, but I'm willing to give this a try." You hear Jisung gasp behind Minho, the younger now leaning over his boyfriend's back.

"Can I get the first kiss of being an official couple?" His wide boba eyes shining in the light. You laugh softly and nod. He kisses Minho's cheek before he climbs off the couch and comes over to you. He leans down and cups your cheeks. "You don't know how long I've dreamt of this." He whispers as he softly places his lips to yours. Taking one of your hands from Minho's, you place it on Jisung's cheek, his facial hair surprisingly soft against your hand. The older lifts your fingers to his lips and places soft kisses to your knuckles. Jisung pulls away, staring at you with heart eyes.

"Can we cuddle, Y/n?" Minho asks between kisses to your knuckles. You smile and nod.

"Should I tell Lee that you won't be able to go on any more dates?" Jisung chuckles softly.

——

It's been six months since you agreed to date Minho and Jisung. They both took it slow with you, not wanting to rush anything. They shower you with gifts and surprise visits to your job. You keep telling them that you don't need gifts to know how they feel about you. But they insist.

You're sitting on your couch, scrolling on your phone, looking for a new apartment. Minho is sitting on your lap, hunched over his laptop that sat on the coffee table in front of you both, also looking for new apartments while Jisung went out to get dinner.

"What about this one, jagi?" He picks his laptop up and leans back against you.

"Well, when you're done smothering me, Min." You laugh. He playfully pouts but sits up again and shows you his screen. It was a beautiful home with three bedrooms for rent, and it was definitely within the price range you had. The people who owned it were an older couple who wanted to move somewhere warmer, so they put it up for rent.

"Ooh, definitely save that. We'll show Ji when he gets home." You smile and set your phone down on the couch. You slip your hands up the back of his shirt and gently start to run your nails along his skin, making him shiver. You've done this for Jisung before and he loved it, and you imagine he's done it for Minho, as Minho has asked you to do it a few times.

"Mm, if you're going to do that, jagi, at least let me take my shirt off. You know the shirt gets in the way." He chuckles, setting his laptop down. He pulls his shirt off and you marvel at the expanse of his back. You've seen him without a shirt a few times, but you're still always amazed at it. You gently start to run your nails over his back, sides and shoulders. He closes his eyes and relaxes under your touch, his skin covered in goosebumps. Jisung walks in and sees you both, a soft smile on his face.

"Ya, I want you to do that to me too." He playfully pouts at you. Your two boys were so cute when they pouted. He walks over and sets the take out bags on the table with another bag of drinks. He sits next to you and cuddles into you, head on your shoulder. You continue your ministrations on Minho's back and he lets out a soft moan. Your hands stop for a second before continuing. Another moment later, he lets out another soft moan.

"I think I found your sweet spot, Min." You tease. He turns in your lap a little and stares at you. He sticks his tongue out at you before moving off your lap to sit on your other side.

"As much as I'd love for you to continue, jagiya brought food, and we need to show him the place we found.

——

Three weeks later, you're packing up your belongings from your bedroom into boxes. You sigh and stand up, packing the last thing in your bedroom into the box, closing it up. Lee walks into your room to come grab one of the bigger boxes.

"You all set?" He beams at you. You turn to him and smile.

"I am. Last few things are the bed and dresser really, but everything is packed up." You pat the box you just closed. "Thank you for helping me bring everything to my new place."

"Of course." He waves you off. "That's what friends are for." He smiles. When he was told that you, Jisung and Minho were now a thing, he was elated for you. He was wondering when they were going to ask you. He helps you carry the last few boxes to the moving truck downstairs. "I'll have Sean help with the furniture when he's off work tonight?" He offers.

"Just as long as you two don't sleep on my furniture." You tease him, making his cheeks turn pink. You can't help but laugh. Even though you and Lee didn't date, you both still got really close.

"I promise we won't, Y/n." He smiles, cheeks still pink. You smile and help put the last of your things in the truck.

——

It's been three months since you moved into the house with your boyfriend's. You each had your own room, but you slept in each other's beds. The first day of moving in, you finally slept with your boyfriends. You felt it was time, and you were more than ready

You're currently laying on the couch with the two. Well, more like you're laying on Jisung with Minho squeezed between the back of the couch and your bodies. Minho had his head on Jisung's shoulder, his hand up the back of your shirt, drawing lazy trails along your skin as you all watched TV. You couldn't be more content.

Taglist

@honeyybbuubblleess @tenshimara

[pillowspace]

Fascinated by how many people are picking the Daycare Attendant on that poll, I would have been soo scared of Sun

[eggmeralda]

just woke up from the best film I've ever watched in my life only to realise it was a dream

[aiura-stan]

(on Gay Hairo being canon)

-True, there’s no evidence that Hairo isn’t gay. You got me there… that’s certainly an Implication in that one chapter, considering Saiki’s reaction.

That said, his ass always being out is not *inherently* gay. I don’t see anything that points to the gag being consistently associated with sexuality in any way. (other than Saiki’s occasional comment.)

(on Saiki’s ‘hypnosis’)

-I feel like we have this same conversation every so often; I apologize in advance if I’m just repeating myself, lmao.

‘Hypnosis’ is his ability to make people look like someone else in canon. I used that word the wrong way, didn’t I. Sorry.

It is separate from ‘mind control,’ which I keep confusing it with, which Kusuo used to make things like his pink hair and limiters normal. He also used it to make it normal for students to have jobs, and to make anime tropes such as quicker healing, the ‘ton’ to the back of the neck effective, and destruction of property quickly fixable (I don’t get that one tbh.)

Yeah, come to think of it, ‘hypnosis’ in the sense of making someone else ignore him, is fanon. You’re right.

That said, Kusuo has a lot of weird perception altering powers. He can use hypnosis to make people look like each other, he can cause an auditory hallucination of music (presumably with his telepathy), he can use mind control to make people believe that things are normal (which in turn somehow changes the world itself.) For whatever reason, people do not notice the year repeating itself again and again as he periodically rewinds time. I can’t find it but I swear somewhere in the manga (is it the anime?) there’s a scene where a guy thinks to himself that Saiki’s limiters are strange, and we are told that he rationalizes it away due to Kusuo’s powers. (presumably his ‘mind control,’ which begs the question, if he actually permanently changed their perception of reality, why should they have to rationalize at all?)

I thought it was somewhere in the early chapters but couldn’t find it when I looked. Argh. But yeah I think that’s why I keep confusing the two. Because at one point, there’s some weird implications due to this one guy reacting to Kusuo’s limiters.

(on Teruhashi’s power to make people ‘fall in love w/ her on sight’)

-Yes, I agree “parasocial relationship” comes closer to what Teruhashi inspires in her followers and the men around her.

(on Saiki being affected by Teruhashi’s beauty)

-Okay, I can see where you’re going with the Teruhashi affecting Saiki point, now. I made some incorrect assumptions about what you meant by that sentence.

I think Teruhashi’s good amounts to being nice. Even though they are often done with ulterior motives, her actions have kind effects at least, if that makes sense.

I mean? It seems to improve their behavior, at least whenever she is around? Like the gag with Rifuta, who asks two boys to walk her to the cafeteria, and they start fighting, but they make up and agree to do it together when Teruhashi chastises them for it. So she’s like their external conscience.

After she leaves… debatable. haha. But I do think she has some sort of power that basically amounts to “make people behave as though they are their best selves due to her beauty” while around her specifically. (Which… I don’t know how I feel about that. But that’s what I think.) And Kusuo isn’t affected by that, because he has his own internal moral compass that he basically refuses to compromise on.

Yeah… after she leaves, I’d say they’re back to stumbling around in the dark, morally speaking. She’s still very much doing good, but even though her sphere of “good” is limited to when she is personally involved. I think that’s part of what makes her ego so bad. Because she truly thinks people can only be their best selves when she is around. Which is why she likes Saiki, because her presence doesn’t effect his actions or morals in the least.

That would definitely be interesting! I wonder how he lost his vision… what was able to injure Saiki’s eyes? At the volcano scene he is pushed to his absolute limit, so maybe it’s some natural disaster like that.

I'm not a fan of soulmates in romantic fiction because it's basically arranged marriage with extra supernatural noncon/dubcon elements.

However, in the Saiki universe, the soulmate connection seems to lack pretty much all of those problematic elements.

We have to do a little extrapolating from what we see in canon since this aspect of Aiura's powers is not covered in detail, but:

Soulmates do not seem to be guaranteed to ever meet, considering the fact that Aiura specifically looked up her soulmate and that one guy who was linked to someone in a remote African village that would almost certainly never cross paths with him.

Being with your soulmate is completely optional, otherwise Aiura wouldn't bother providing relationship scoring and just tell each person to go find their soulmate. This allows for a lot of narrative opportunities to explore why someone would consciously choose to not be with their soulmate, and also opens up the door for polyamory.

Soulmates do not instantly fall in love, and are not forced to stay in love by any supernatural powers. Aiura didn't think anything of Saiki until he flawlessly saved Yumehara's life like 10x in a row, and Saiki certainly didn't fall for Aiura right away either. They fought over their values strongly enough that it would've been a breakup if they'd ever been together.

Soulmate status just seems to indicate particularly good chemistry, and like the rest of Aiura's powers, is purely informational and not determinative. Presumably soulmates have the highest possible compatibility scores, and it's kinda cool that it seems guaranteed there's at least 1 person out there who will jive with you, but also plenty of other people you can connect with to various degrees.

With Saiki and Aiura specifically, it's shown that Saiki can change the future Aiura sees as soon as he hears about it. It may even be possible for him to change the soulmate determination, and he certainly could've used Time Leap to fool Aiura into thinking someone else was her soulmate if he was really opposed to the concept. She had scryed it recently, so the butterfly effect shouldn't be a challenge.

But they do work so smoothly together with their powers complementing each other, and Saiki is kind of a lonely romantic tsundere at heart, so it makes sense that he would let the soulmate thing play out and yet test the connection by pushing Aiura away as much as possible.

Actually, considering that Saiki can't control people's actions directly (and that he sucks at trying to control people indirectly), the strongest noncon/dubcon force in the Saikiverse shockingly appears to be Teruhashi's beauty.

The only male character that doesn't seem at all affected by Teruhashi's powers is Hairo, most likely because of his heavily implied homosexuality. Women attracted to other women are also impacted by her power, as seen with Aiura.

While Saiki says that married people aren't affected by Teruhashi, Kuniharu does actually show several signs of being affected by Teruhashi, and so does Kumagoro.

All affected people instantly fall in love with her on sight, no exceptions.

Critical thinking ability appears to drop precipitously when it comes to her, with her fans accepting that she had a secret child with Saiki despite being in school with her every day and that she can just choose not to poop for a week. More effective mind control than anything Saiki can do tbh.

The instant Saiki loses some of his powers, he starts being affected by Teruhashi's beauty.

The narrative supports Saiki's theory that Teruhashi is literally favored by God and can affect reality just by hoping for something. The implication that God is (physically??) attracted to Teruhashi and does whatever she wants is.... yikes on several levels. If she asks for someone to love her, do they get a choice in the matter??

Anyways, there are way more elements of noncon/dubcon with Teruhashi ships than there are with actual canon soulmate mechanics in the Saikiverse and that's just such a wild choice by the author lol.

Truly subverting tropes!

[arlathen]

the brainrot has gotten deep enough that i now have professors solavellan modern au on the mind again.

[arolesbianism]

If I had the freedom of not knowing there is going to be future new lore stuff added to oni I would do unspeakable things to so many of these guys. Or Id just make them normal guys who just sorta exist. Either or.

[thyras]

Thanks for tagging me @casien! Do you make your bed? NOPE. I am a heathen.

Favourite number? 3

Job: I am a stay at home mom first and foremost, then a student second. I am getting my Masters in Medieval History.

If you could go back to school, would you? I'm already in school and yeah I will NOT be getting my doctorate cause this is already too much.

Can you parallel park? Yep! I can parallel park pretty much anything and ive even done a two horse horse trailer before lol perks of growing up on a ranch.

Do you think aliens are real? Yep! As my bachelor's degree is in Astrophysics, I wholeheartedly believe we are not alone because there is no way that we are the only ones. Sure we probably are the only ones that look like us, but that does not rule out organisms or other walks of life.

Can you drive a manual car? Yes, I drove race cars for some time in my early twenties, even built one, as well as old manual trucks while on the farm. My dad wanted to make sure I was a very well rounded lady who needed no man.

What's your guilty pleasure? I don't have guilty pleasures because I do not feel guilty about the things I like to do.

Tattoos? I have 3 currently, working on my 4th here soon. I have a planet sleeve on my left and right arms with quotes from Carl Sagan as he is one of my idols for becoming a physicist. Then I have the Bayern Munich saying on my ribcage because they are my favorite sports team. My friend is tattoo artist and she is helping me plan out my LOTR one rn before I get my Star Wars one because LOTR is a bigger deal to me because of my mom, so it'll kinda be a memorial tattoo for her.

Do you like puzzles? Yes! I love chasing enigmas hehehe (sorry had to pull that Ba'kif line from Chaos Rising)

Any phobias? Spiders, Deep Water, Heights, I could honestly go on tbh

Favourite childhood sports? I have ridden horses all my life, but I did enjoy swimming and playing soccer.

Do you talk to yourself? BIG YES. I work a lot of my problems aloud, it scares my husband sometimes but he's gotten used to it by now so I doubt he cares. But he will turn around when I am talking about my stories as I work them out and he just raises a brow like tf.

No pressure tags: @vibratingskull @louiselouve @lailalalesi @hailturinturambar

DASH GAME

(about Pirate)

Do you make your bed? Sort of? I don't want the cats getting fur all over the duvet as the husband has a slight allergy so I have to tidy it up and have a blanket over it.

Favourite number? Like Luke mine's also probably 13. Or 8.

Job? Typist and medical PA, both public and private sectors.

If you could go back to school, would you? In the sense of being a kid again, nope. If there's something I ever want to study in the future, I'd consider it but it'd likely only be courses that don't involve exams. Exams are too stressful.

Can you parallel park? I can parallel park my arse? (No)

Do you think aliens are real? Yes, but any we can actually reach are unlikely to be like the ones in films. Maybe in another life and if we survive getting off this planet then contact will be possible.

Can you drive a manual car? The only kind of car I can drive involves me playing games on computers.

What's your guilty pleasure? Also like Luke I love to hyperfixate on a song and listen to it for hours on repeat. I swear I had something else for this the last time I wanted to fill this out. Overindulging on video games. Dressing up as Jack Sparrow more times than necessary.

Tattoos? One on my right shoulder that says 'XI', which is one of the muses I brought to this blog and means a lot to me. One on my left shoulder that is a Lokified Jera rune taken from the Kibblesmith Loki comics.

Do you like puzzles? Yes, but only certain kinds. I'm terrible at maths. I like ones I can figure out with not too much trouble so that I feel clever and not rubbish XD or ones I can use a walkthrough for if I've taken too long to figure it out. I do love puzzle games.

Any phobias? Wasps. Somewhat agoraphobic/claustrophobic as I get panic attacks if I think I can't breathe even when there is oxygen. I know that isn't agoraphobia, but it happens more in crowded open spaces with a lot of noise than properly closed ones, though I do have to feel trapped. It got worse since Covid. I have texture phobias too and something else I won't reveal openly in case of trolls.

Favourite childhood sport? Haha what. I mean I guess I occasionally enjoyed badminton and for a while I did like netball. I am not a sport person.

Do you talk to yourself? All. The. Time. I'm the only one who needs to put up with this amount of incessant babble ok? I'm really sorry to the people who game with me who hear me yell or make comment on what's going on, because it's ingrained in me now.

Stole it from: @therebetterbepie

Tagging: (no pressure!) @compassofsouls @small-carbon-lifeform @celestialmantdonna @antvnger @divinityrisen and anyone else who wants to do it if you haven't done it already!

[blackcatxmagic]

Nodding, Winter agreed, "Yeah, especially me. I mean...I always have honey here. It's sort of my thing. But I need different ways to enjoy it or else I'll...well, stop enjoying it, you know? And I don't want that because..." Winter trailed off; he knew what he was about to say, but he also knew it might sound stupid. Still, he said it anyway, telling Stoker, "It's so much a part of who I am, beekeeping and selling my honey and all of that, and I kind of don't know who I would be without it." There was one thing though that Winter didn't say out loud: that his bees brought him so much comfort because sometimes it felt like they were the only ones to truly understand him. Their bond was unexplainable and deep, and Winter truly loved them. But he thought that might be too much for Stoker. It seemed like the other understood Winter's point though, and that made him smile. Yes, he was glad the two of them had met.

Upon giving the honey to his new friend, Winter saw his reaction, which made him smile even more in turn. It always felt good to him to make other people happy, and he already knew he'd be giving Stoker another free jar of honey at some point. "It's no big deal," he said, still grinning at them. "I mean...I've got more honey than I can manage sometimes." Right now he didn't have quite as much because it was winter, but he still had more than enough to sell at the markets for the next couple of months. And besides, that wasn't Winter's livelihood anyway - he'd only ever done this because he loved it, not as a job. "I wanted to do something nice for you," he said softly. "I just...I always appreciate when people like me." Winter felt himself getting a little vulnerable now, and he blushed slightly, but still he continued. "Sometimes people think I'm weird or are put-off by the fact that my memory is so terrible," Winter explained further, "so I just...I'm glad you're not one of those people." His cheeks were just a little redder now, but Winter didn't feel embarrassed; he felt like Stoker would understand.

And that was why Winter found himself talking further about the memory issues - he could tell that Stoker wouldn't judge him or make an excuse to leave or something (at least he hoped not). "It's...it's been hard," Winter explained. "I don't even remember how to drive. You know that car in the driveway? That's mine, but it's pretty useless to me. And...and it's not just like a couple of notes." He walked over to a drawer nearby and pulled it open, taking out a stack of notes and holding them up to show Stoker. "See what I mean?" He didn't want to dwell on it too much, but it just felt nice being able to open up about this. There were some things Winter didn't say though, like how he was afraid to even try learning how to drive again because he was worried he wouldn't be able to retain anything he learned. This felt too personal to reveal though, at least for right now. Stoker had nothing but positive and encouraging things to say, and their support made Winter smile, feeling a little less self-conscious. "I'm getting by," he replied, "I am. It's just...it's hard sometimes, and it's embarrassing too." His cheeks were just a little red now, but mostly Winter felt safe and comfortable with his new friend, and he appreciated that greatly.

After the pair had made their tea, Winter sat at the counter with Stoker, taking a sip. "Another way I like honey is on toast," he told Stoker. "Just like drizzled on. If you haven't tried it, well..." He trailed off, nodding toward the jar of honey he'd given the other, a smile on his face. For a couple more minutes, they sat there enjoying their tea, and Winter asked, "So what do you like to do in your free time, Stoker? I guess we still don't know a ton about each other, do we?" Winter felt like Stoker could end up being a good friend, but he wanted to know them more. He removed a small notebook from his pocket as well as a pen, blushing slightly once more. "Is it okay if I take notes?" Winter asked the other.

Stoker laughed. "I am a tea person, yeah. I'm a bit of an avid drinker in general, so I'm a big fan of a lot of drinks, but tea has always been up there with my favourites," they explained, giving a completely unnecessary long winded answer, not unlike Stoker. "I think that's a perfectly acceptable reason to be a tea drinker," Stoker shrugged. "I mean, if you stuck to straight honey all the time I feel like you'd be more likely to get sick of it by now," which definitely wouldn't be a very good thing for someone who was so involved with the making of honey.

"For me?" Stoker confirmed, the smile already on his face growing larger. While he knew that Winter was kind and generous, he didn't expect a whole bottle from his best batch of the year, and that oddly touched Stoker. "Thank you very much, Winter. I'll treat it like liquid gold," he chuckled. He already knew that Silas would be benefitting from the gift too, which made Stoker feel hopeful that he could pay Winter back by sending Silas and his thick wallet his way with some business.

The switch up in conversation to the topic of Winter's accident was one that surprised Stoker so very much, but it wasn't unwelcome. If anything, Stoker valued honesty, particularly when it was honesty regarding something so vulnerable. "You haven't told me this before," Stoker reassured him. "I think the notes are a great way of managing that, that's a really smart use of resources," Stoker's words were completely honest, and his tone was relatively stable; he didn't want to come across like he was pitying Winter in a way that would make him feel less than other's without issues similar. "I know my words are just, well, words, but you don't need to hide them from me." Stoker didn't know how deep Winter's embarrassment went, but he truly did want his friend to know that there was no reason to be ashamed.

"Thank you," Stoker was more than happy to busy himself by putting honey into his tea and moving on to a conversation about it instead. While he meant what he said when speaking of Winter's accident, seeing the way that the other reacted to having left a note out, Stoker didn't want to force him to ruminate on the subject. "This smells amazing with the honey in it," he commented, smile as bright as his sparkling, friendly eyes.

[shotmrmiller]

it turned to smut in seconds, i cannot control my own hands, ok. 18+ (implication of breeding kink or something and simon's a jealous boy)

ex-husband simon who signed the divorce papers without a fight. it'd stung, you're not gonna lie, but it needed to be done and the fact that he didn't make a big fuss about it made things easier for you physically. (emotionally you were in shambles because did he not even want to try and fight for you?)

he comes over only on the weekends when he's on leave.

he's a good father to his boys. he takes them to their softball games when he can, buys them the ice cream and takes them toy shopping.

and then there's a sharp knock at your door on a wednesday afternoon.

"simon?"

he walks in like he owns the place, which technically he does- even pays the mortgage because there's no way you would be able to afford living here with your own measly income.

"what's this the boys are tellin' me 'bout a man bein' in here?" his voice is calm, steady. but you know simon better than you know yourself, and he's furious.

"i- i'm not sure-" he swipes his hand in the air and your mouth clicks shut.

"don't lie t'me, poppet, or i'll be findin' him myself an' you really don't want tha'."

what man? there hasn't been any since the divorce! you're digging through your memories, scrambling to find what the hell he's talking about when-

"oh! it's the plumber!" you take steadying breath. "i called a plumber on sunday. i needed the kitchen sink fixed."

his dark eyes are piercing, so sharp they could cut. simon's always been a walking lie detector, and it's unnerving to be on the opposite end of that analyzing stare.

he nods imperceptibly, then flicks his gaze to behind you, over your head. "show me."

you scoff indignantly. "show you what? the bloody sink?"

simon wordlessly heads to the kitchen and his knees pop as he kneels-

he's actually checking the fucking sink.

with a grunt, he leans his head into the cabinet and twist awkwardly which is no doubt causing a familiar pain to flare up in his lower back. you can't help but wince in sympathy.

lo and behold, there's a shiny, white elbow in the middle of the rest of the dirty, scratched pipe.

he hums, and rises to his feet, closing the cabinet with his leg.

simon approaches you slowly, fingertips touching the kitchen island as he rounds it. "palms flat on the counter, sweetheart."

oh. oh you know exactly what that means, and your pussy throbs almost in reflex. months without his touch and your body still responds the same.

your protest already at the tip of your tongue, almost involuntarily because principles, but he sees right through you, as he's always done.

"jus' a reward for all o' your hard work. takin' care o' the boys is a stressful job all on its own." his worn hand cups the underside of your jaw tenderly. "aren't i always good t'ya?"

your exhales are weak, just like your resolve. "okay."

simon's eyes glint with satisfaction as he lifts his hand, index pointing upwards and twirls it in a slow, deliberate motion.

your palms are flat on the counter when he curls his fingers into the waistband of your shorts and knickers, tugging them downward.

they're flat on the counter when he lowers himself to his knees and taps the inside of your foot, indicating you to widen your stance.

they're curled into fists when his breath puffs against your slick cunt and his warm tongue slides through your folds, drawing lazy circles around your bud. a tingle of arousal shoots up your spine, his mouth sparking a fire right under your navel.

they're reaching for simon, nails sinking into the delicate skin of his wrist as your back bows when you come on his tongue, vision spotted with black, blurry dots and white hot ecstasy coursing through your veins.

your hands are now crossed at the base of your spine, your cheek pressing into the cool kitchen counter as he bends you over it.

"15 minutes before the boys are home from school. tha's plenty o'time, yeah?"

a rhetorical, if you've ever heard one.

your knuckles stain white as you clench your fists at the heavy, hot weight of his manhood stretching your walls to take him in, a sweet burn that you've always loved. he's gentle but sure, bottoming out in one smooth stroke that pushes the air out of your lungs. the sibilant hiss simon lets out is never fails to elicit a whimper out of you.

"fuck," he groans. "i could stay inside this pretty pussy forever."

and the dirty talk. how much you've missed it.

"would you like tha', pet? be inside of ya til you don't know where i end and you begin?"

a garbled mhm slips past your lips. your head already empty at just the sensation of being so unbearably full that it feels like you're tearing at the seams.

"another time, then, since the kids'll be home soon."

he begins to move, shallow but firm thrusts that drag his cock along your nerves deliciously- a sure fire way of getting you to climax around him in minutes.

your walls begin to squeeze down as the knot in your stomach tightens, and he lets go of your wrists, looping an arm around your waist and straightens you- his broad chest to your much smaller back.

his clever fingers wind downwards, and rub precise, little circles on your slippery clit, and it's all too much, you're hurtling toward the precipice at neck break speed- "god, simon, please-"

his pace never falters, not his hips nor his fingers as your moans begin to rise in pitch. "i'll get ya there, love."

he does, he gets you to your highest peak- blindingly intense- one that chokes the very breath out of you and slackens your knees. "i've got ya."

there's no strength left in you to brace for the spine-jarring thrusts he gives after, the only thing keeping you from sprawling forward is the arm that's looped around you as he pulls you to him.

"on anything?" he rumbles.

your ears ring at that because he can't possibly- your head shakes unbidden.

"good."

the last four thrusts are heavy, backed by his weight, and he smothers a loud groan into the junction of your shoulder as he finishes inside of you- thick, viscous cum filling you until it begins to drip and fall to the floor with an audible plop.

he presses tender little kisses to your sweaty shoulder and nips the side of your neck. "just in time."

the clock on the stove says 5 minutes before the bus gets there.

he helps you redress, chuckling under his breath when you won't look him in the eye. "i'll get the kids, go get cleaned up."

the knot in your chest loosens when you hear the boys' laughter at seeing their father on the driveway. it loosens when simon picks both of them up, one in each arm, and glances up at you as you look down at them from the window.

heat licks up your cheeks when he gives you a smarmy little grin.

idiot.