#anyway I cried for like half an hour after talking with my mom lol

[tamayokny]

earlier today, my irl bestie asked me how i was doing in relation to the loss of my nephew. i said that most days i feel fine but was unsure of how true that really is. (but i am doing better than my sister—this isn’t a dig, she’s going through the most out of anyone.) i also admitted that i try not to deeply reflect on things too much.

flash forward to about 9pm. my mom and i are talking about the kids. i start to bring up how my nephew was my little buddy, but as i reminisced, i had to stop. i began to tear up because it’s true. he was my little buddy and now he’s not here with us—he’ll be 11 years old forever. and that really sucks. his grandparents, parents, aunts, and uncles shouldn’t have outlived him. it’s unimaginable but an unfortunate reality that families battle through.

some days are better than others. but i think about my nephew every single day.

[neobubz]

The Tutor (M)

apologies that this story took so long. it was a long one to write and after writing the later half of it it 2x only for it to get deleted i didn't know if this was ever going to get finished. anyway, hope you like it nonetheless. enjoy ^^

Word Count: approx. 29k Pairing(s): tutor johnny (mr. suh) x fem reader feat. professor jaehyun (mr. jeong) Warning(s): explicit language, mdni (minors do not interact), smut, father johnny, johnny as a dad, infidelity, cheating, tutor x student, dubcon, slow burn, au, fingering, oral (male and female receiving), s*uiriting Preview (no spoilers here lol): Managing to shove them higher you put on a bright smile. “Well, then these are for you Mr. Suh! I also bought you some chocolates. My mom and dad like these. I always get it for them for their anni —” you stop yourself. “Sp-Special occasions. Or when I want something from them.” You turn your almost blunder into a joke. “I also have some flowers and chocolates for Lily. Mr. Jeong told me what her favorites are.”

Again you’re wrapped into a tight embrace. Mr. Suh’s body hunching over until his face is buried in your neck. “Thank you,” he pulls you close to him. “Thank you.” Disclaimer: because of the length of the story i am not able to format it the way i normally do. so again, my apologies. i'll keep this in mind going forward :)

It wasn’t as if you didn’t try. You did everything humanly possible to turn your grades around. Studying to all hours of the night. Going to the tutors on campus for help — all of which ran for the hills when they saw you coming. Even asking your bestie, Doyoung, for help. Knowing full well what a pickle you were in he volunteered as well. However, when he saw how truly helpless you were he forfeited and told you to change career paths.

Currently in your second year at Neo University, you were acing every class except one. One single class in which you were warned about. No one passed with flying colors, even Doyoung struggled. Doyoung, the Valedictorian when the two of you were in High School — excelling in his classes with flying colors in Elemntary and Middle school, but when it came to this class — barely passing with a D+. This class was a different beast all together. Some girls in your dormitory actually cried when their final grades came in. Only sending shivers down your spine for the following semester where you too would find yourself in tears time and time again. 

Sadly, all of your feeble attempts only resounded in a giant letter in blood red ink, F. Again! This has been your fifth F of the semester. Thankfully completing all of the homework assignments, even the extra problems was keeping your head above water. But still, an F was not what you wanted to see. Not only that, your teacher decided to emphasize the triumph with a thick red circle. And to top it off, scribbled underneath, ‘stay after class,’ written in beautiful cursive handwriting. This was it. The talk. You were dreading this moment. Every year, every teacher from primary school to secondary has given you the talk. 

‘What is wrong?’ ‘What aren’t you understanding?’ ‘If you were struggling this much you should have asked for help!’ ‘Have you tried a private tutor?’ Groaning you let your head fall flat onto your desk. Mr. Jeong wasn’t going to be any different. He was going to say the same things you’ve heard all your life. 

At this point you were sure that Math was just a big douche who loved to shit on you time and time again. Your personal kryptonite in the world. All of the functions, equations, a million fucking ways to do one single problem because some sick twisted asshole came around and said ‘hey, I’ve discovered a new method,’ only adding to everyone’s frustrations! Yeah, Math hated you and you hated it. Case closed.

When the bell rang and everyone scattered out of the classroom all to eager to leave, you stayed back, as instructed. Raising his arm and slicking back his dark brown hair — a habit Mr. Jeong had that made all the girls swoon, yourself included, he made his approach. Eyes dead set on you. Lips in a hard line, he pulled out the chair in front and turned it to face your desk before sitting down. 

“I’m guessing you know why I’ve asked you to stay back,” he starts a long tired sigh leaving him.

“I swear I’m trying!” You rush to get everything out before he even has a chance to ask you the same questions every other teacher has asked you. “I went down to the tutoring classroom. They all have decided I’m a lost cause. I even asked my friend who took your class last semester! He only looked at me like I’m stupid. I’m not stupid by the way,” you hiss surprising Mr. Jeong. A tiny smile creeping at the corners of his mouth. “I’ve struggled with Math my whole life. No matter how hard I try to study I just can’t seem to grasp any of the concepts. At this point I’m pretty sure it’s my arch nemesis!”

“Why didn’t you seek my help from the very beginning?” He asks calmly.

“I don’t want to look like an idiot right off the bat! I hate being peoples’ ‘little project.’” You roll your eyes at the label you’ve been placed with since childhood.

Turning his head away Mr. Jeong covers his growing smile with the back of his hand disguising it as a cough. “Well, I for one don’t think you’re stupid.” 

“Really?!” 

If this were some kind of anime you know you’d be looking at him with shaky watery eyes, grateful that someone finally sees you — not as an idiot but as someone who has the capability to accomplish their hearts desires! But since is reality you settle for a stunned expression, your mouth hanging open.

“I just think you need some guidance. May I see your test?” Nodding you grab the paper from your folder sliding it to him. “Right here, you used the right equation, but made the tiniest error here,” he points with a blue pen circling the area of your mistake. Thank heavens it wasn’t a red pen. By the end of college you’ll never want to see the color red again.

Looking up at Mr. Jeong stunned you shake your head in disbelief. “S-So I just goofed?”

“Well, yes and no. Do you go over your work and double, triple check your answers?”

“I never know if I’m right or wrong and I get freaked out and second guess myself. So I just think it is what it is and hand in my paper. I promise I’ll triple, no! Quadruple check my work next time!”

“Checking your work is only half the problem. You still aren’t understanding all the equations.” He points to a few problems on the second page. “The equations are all wrong. You mixed the second page equation setup with the third page. So, ultimately, all of the answers are wrong.”

Groaning you slam your head on your desk. Mr. Jeong moving his hands away just in time before you made another blunder and crushed his fingers. “Maybe I am stupid. I’m sorry, Mr. Jeong.” 

“You’re not stupid. Please don’t call yourself that and please don’t slam your head down that hard. You’ll hurt yourself. Now, sadly, I myself am booked up solid with tutoring some of my other students. But, I do have a friend who I know can help you.”

“Really?!” You practically spring up from your seat.

“Y-Yes,” he moves away from you eyeing you suspiciously. “His name is Johnny Suh. He teaches Mathematics at a high school not far from here. If you don’t mind I can give him a call and see if he’s available to help you.”

“Yes! Please, Mr. Jeong! My mom is going to kill me if my grades don’t start taking a turn for the better.”

And with that you stand outside of Mr. Suh’s house, or mansion. Your head tilts to the side wondering how in the hell a high school teacher is able to live in a home that can be used in itself as a small school for children. Checking down at the address Mr. Jeong gave you, you check to make sure you were in the right spot. 7716 Zennie Drive. 

Shrugging you ring the doorbell and place a gentle knock on the door. After your talk with Mr. Jeong, the following day when you had his class he pulled you to the side as you walked in. Stating he talked to Mr. Suh, and he was more than willing to be your tutor. 

Apparently the two went way back to their early high school days as best friends. You were told you’d be taken care of but the only time Mr. Suh’s schedule was free was Wednesday, Friday and Saturday from 4PM to 7PM. Thankfully, you scheduled all your classes in the morning hours — your last class ending at 12PM, giving you ample time to eat and rest up before heading over to whom you hope is your saving grace. 

But the door has remained closed. No movement. No sounds coming from inside. Checking your phone you made sure that today was in fact, Wednesday. Yep. And it was 4:14PM. Having trouble locating the home at first put you behind schedule. Yet, you’re still standing outside the massive door and no one appears to be home. 

“Mr. Suh!” You knock on the door. 

Stepping back you wait. Shuffling back and forth you try to focus on any signs of life coming from behind the door when a blood curdling scream comes from the other side of the house.

Jumping at the sound your hand goes to your heart. “What the —” Looking around hoping you weren’t the only one who heard the scream you find yourself alone. Great…

Reaching into your pocket you grab your keys which hold not only a whistle, but a fresh new canister of pepper spray. Gripping the spray tightly in your hand you slowly make your way around the side of the house. 

“M-Mr. Suh…” you whisper. No answer. Sticking yourself to the wall of the home you make your way around the first corner only to see something you didn’t expect.

“No!” Another high-pitched scream pierces your ears.

“I’m going to get you!” An older gentleman chases after a small girl in a tutu around a massive backyard.

“No! The evil troll king!” The little girl wails. 

“Get back here with my gold!”

Blinking a few times you hope your mind is making up the scene in front of you. This is Mr. Suh?! The man in front of you appears to be around the same age as Mr. Jeong, but he is much more…he lets out such a light hearted laugh that you step back from him, handsome!!!

“Lord help me…” you whisper to yourself.

Mr. Jeong was already the hottest teacher on campus. Granted, not exactly your type. He held some kind of mystery behind his eyes that unsettled you the numerous times you made eye contact with him. Perhaps it was a look of pity he had knowing you were bombing his class, but there was something darker and mysterious. Something that made your stomach twist and turn. 

Many girls would gawk and stare when he’d walk across campus after his classes ended before his break. Admittedly so have you. Every time he walked it seemed as if there was a red carpet or some type of runway he was strutting down. The man was a living breathing luxury brand model! Definitely up there with the Versace or Prada models. 

Mr. Suh, gulping the saliva that was threatening to pour from your parted lips — he was a different type of handsome, and absolutely your type. Short jet black hair sticks to his forehead the longer he plays with the little girl. A loose fitted white button down shirt, with three buttons undone revealing a glimpse of his chest. A broad ches, and just the thought of what he looks like shirtless has your heart beating faster. You were entering dangerous waters with your gawking but you continued. Loose fitted trousers that didn’t give way to the shape of his legs but with the overall size of Mr. Suh, he absolutely has muscular legs. He just screamed toned.

“U-Uh,” you try to find your voice holding up your hand. “E-Excuse me,” you manage to squeak out.

Freezing, the little girl and who you assume is Mr. Suh turn in your direction. 

“Daddy!” The little girl cries out before running behind him. Her tiny hands clenching onto his pants — eyes peeking around him to look at you, before hiding once more.

Daddy? You stare wide-eyed. He’s a father, already?!

“I’m sorry,” you start to back away. “I don’t mean to intrude. I heard a scream and —”

“It’s fine,” a chuckle comes from the man. “You’re the student Jaehyun sent over, right?”

“Jaehyun?” Your head tilts. “M-Mr. Jeong?” 

Nodding, Mr. Suh walks forward, his daughter still clinging to him for dear life. “Sorry, yes. Mr. Jeong,” Johnny towers over you. “I’m Johnny Suh, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” He reaches out his hand.

Saying your name quickly, you enclose your hand around his only to gasp at the size difference. “N-Nice to meet you too…” you say in awe.

“I hope you weren’t waiting long. I lost track of time. This is my daughter, Lily.” He gestures to the girl glaring at you from behind him.

Bending down to her level you try to give her your sweetest smile. “Hi, Lily. It’s nice to meet you.”

“No!” She shouts at you and runs away from you and into the house.

“U-Uhhh…” a sliver of sweat rolls down the side of your face. 

“Lily!” Mr. Suh shouts. “I’m sorry, for her behavior. I think she’s a little shy.” He brushes his hair out of his face. “Please, come inside. So, Jaehyun told me you’re having trouble in his class,” he starts off the conversation.

“Y-Yes,” you quickly follow behind him. “No matter how hard I try I can’t seem to understand a single thing he’s teaching. I’ve tried asking for help on campus but no one seems to want to deal with me. It’s sad to say that you too may fall prey to my idiocy and drop me as well.”

Chuckling Mr. Suh slides open the glass door leading straight into the kitchen. “I’m sure we can figure out what the problem is.”

“I hope so. My mom’s going to kill me if my grades don’t improve soon.”

Taking off your shoes at the door you’re led to a small table in front of a window. “Please, have a seat and I’ll be right back. Would you like anything to drink while you wait?”

“A glass of water would be lovely.”

Heading over to his cupboard he grabs down a glass, goes to the fridge and pours you some water. Thinking he would do what your father always does when you ask for a glass of water and get it from the tap — this was definitely an act of kindness. 

“I’m just going to go check on Lily, then I’ll be right back.”

“I can leave and come back some other time if this is an inconvenience for you. I don’t want to take your time away from your daughter.”

“Nonsense. She’s just a little crabby today,” he rests a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “Why don’t you get your book out and start on your assignment and I’ll be right back.”

“Yes, sir,” you nod and scramble to take out your book and binder.

When Mr. Suh was out of earshot you exhale a long deep breath that you didn’t know you were holding in. This is terrible. Absolutely terrible! Taking out your phone you shoot a quick message to your best friend Jennifer.

I’m in deep shit!  My tutor is soooo hot! Like fucking hot!  And he’s sooo tall! What do I do Jen?!!!!

Hiding your phone under your leg you wait for her reply. Having seen the time, she should be getting out of soccer practice soon and heading for the lockers. Twiddling your pencil in your hand you try to focus on the problem staring back at you.

This was going to be grueling. How is it that for the last year and a half you haven’t stepped foot in front of a man you thought was handsome — but when you need help because you’re a dumbass, the Universe places a walking Greek God before you? 

Then again, you scoff. “He’s married, you idiot.” You whisper. “And he’s a dad! Focus!!”

Finding a smidge of peace from your rampant thoughts you get to work. The homework seemed easy when Mr. Jeong was explaining it. All you had to do was follow the equation that you just learned. Simple enough.

Or so you thought... An eon went by and you were still staring at the first problem. Pencil snagged between your teeth, bite marks up and down the piece of wood. A personal habit you picked up specifically from Mr. Jeong’s class.

“You use this, to solve this.” You start talking to yourself quietly. “Then why is it so damn hard to solve this problem?!” 

“Stuck already?” A voice whispers next to your ear.

Jumping back, your phone crashing to the floor and you stare wide-eyed at Mr. Suh. With a small cat-like grin he takes a seat next to you, picking up your phone in the process.

“Didn’t mean to startle you. You were just hyper focused and I couldn’t resist.”

“Uh, y-yeah,” you reach for your phone only for it to slip out of your hands. “Shit,” you curse.

“About the language,” Mr. Suh clears his throat.

“Oh no!” You pop your head up from under the table. “Yes. No. I’m sorry. I know you have a child. I’m just nervous I guess. Please forgive me. It won’t happen again.”

Nodding he leans back in his chair. “Why are you nervous? Is Jaehyun stressing you out with all the work?”

“No!” You shout. “I mean,” you try to speak calmly. “I’m just nervous that you’ll find out I’m unteachable.”

“No one is unteachable. I’m sure Jaehyun will tell you the same thing. He’s given me a heads up on what you’re having trouble with, but if you don’t mind me asking, may I see your tests?”

Horror befalls you. He can’t be serious. He doesn’t actually want to see that travesty. Surely Mr. Jeong told him how much of a dumbass you were. He has to know that you are in desperate need of help.

“My-My tests?” 

“Yes. I want to see exactly where you’re struggling. This tutoring is going to be in regards to your Final. For the next two and a half months I’m going to try my best to bring your grade up so you can pass and put this class and Jaehyun behind you. In order to do that, I need to see everything that you’re struggling with.”

“Fine…” Opening your binder you fish out all of your tests and quizzes. Every proof of your failure. “I’ll understand if you want to quit while you’re ahead.” You squint your eyes tightly as you slide the papers over to him.

“Oh stop it can’t be —” he pauses mid-sentence his mouth falling open. “Oh, wow…” he mumbles.

“Yep. Told you. I’m stupid. Still want to take on this walking nightmare?”

“I mean he told me you were really struggling but I didn’t think this badly.” He glances up at you for a second to see the pout on your lips and in your eyes. “I’m not going to run away. I’m just shocked he waited until you were this deep in the hole to do something.” 

“Maybe he thought I would magically get better.”

“He said his schedule is booked solid with tutoring other students?” 

“Yep.”

“He’s so blind,” Mr. Suh shakes his head. “Okay, how about today I help you with your homework for Monday, and by tomorrow I’ll have a study plan and a guide all made up for you!” 

“Eh?! You still want to help me? Are you sure? I won’t be upset if you say no. Even my best friend abandoned me.”

Laughing he waves a dismissive hand. “Believe it or not, Jaehyun wasn’t the Math genius he is today. Even when he was back in college he struggled a little. We all need help every now and then.”

“Thank you, Mr. Suh! I won’t let you down!”

Just like he promised, he helped you with your homework. Shockingly only looking at you incredulously a few times when he needed to dumb everything down for you to the point his daughter would be able to understand. Feeling a little better after your first tutoring session, you head back to your dorm with your head held high. Maybe this was going to be your second wind. A power up to keep you in the game.

You were sure of one thing. You would not let Mr. Suh down. 

When you got to your dorm room your best friend, Jennifer was waiting impatiently outside the door. Her fingers being gnawed by her teeth. “Where the hell have you been? I was worried about you. I tried calling and texting back.”

“Eh?” You grab your phone. “My phone was on the whole —” you press the home button but it doesn’t turn on. “This can’t be. I charged it before I left. I had a full battery.”

Pressing the small button on the side you find your phone had been turned off completely. A cold shiver rakes over you. Did Mr. Suh turn off your phone when he picked it up? Your Lock Screen appearing, a text from your friend the only thing displayed.

A hot tutor?! How hot is he? A scale of 0-10? Take a picture I want to see!

Gulping you show her your phone. “I-I think Mr. Suh turned off my phone. Jen! What do I do? What if he saw your message?! How can I show my face around him again? He probably thinks I’m disgusting! He’s a married man with a child! What do I do?!” You stomp around like a child as you open your door.

“Don’t freak out. Maybe he just turned it off. He could have a no phone policy.”

“You think?”

Nodding she ushers you to your bed where she plops down beside you. “So, tell me everything! Seriously! How hot is he?”

Giving his daughter one last kiss, Johnny wishes her a goodnight and sweet dreams. Today was a day like no other. Little did he know when he decided to take on this job of being a tutor would he find out that his student needed a savior imstead. Sighing he reaches into his pocket for his phone. 

Jaehyun had a lot of explaining to do. Why he didn’t tell him you were so far behind in your studies? When he said one of his students needs help and he’s booked solid he assumed it was just a normal case of an over achieving student. Seeing your grades brought on a whole other problem. You would need to get at least a B+ on your final to even have a passing grade. Why would he let you get so far behind, and how does Jaehyun expect you to get your grades up in such a short period of time?

It just didn’t make sense. Jaehyun has always been active in the Math Lab, as well as private tutoring jobs on the weekends. During his breaks he helps any student who can’t meet up with him after his usual working hours. Something had to be up. There is no way he would let you slip through the cracks like this.

Holding the phone to his ear, Johnny steps away from his daughters room.

“Hey!” Jaehyun says on the other end. “How did it go?”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Johnny hisses quietly. “Why did you let her get to this point? When I saw her grades I thought I was seeing things! Seriously, Jaehyun…what the hell is going on?”

“I didn’t intend for this to happen.” Jaehyun snaps defensively. “I’ve been booked solid since the semester started. She was doing poor in the beginning but so were a lot of other students. This course is one of the hardest courses to teach and learn. I figured if she was really having trouble she would ask me for help or go to the Math Lab.”

“She’s in deep trouble, you know that, right?”

“Of course I know that. Which is why I sent her to you. Plus,” Jaehyun pauses alarming Johnny. “I wouldn’t have been a good tutor for her anyway.”

“Why not? You’re her teacher! You know all the answers! How would you not be a good tutor?” Johnny heads for his study.

Mumbling into the phone Jaehyun confesses. “A conflict of interest.”

Stopping dead in his tracks Johnny stares out into the empty hallway. Jaehyun had to be kidding. He couldn’t have possibly — “For fuck’s sake, man…”

“I know. I didn’t intend for this to happen. I don’t even know when it happened. But it did. That’s why I sent her to you. You are the only person who can help her. I talked to those in the Math Lab and they can barely help the students who understand the basic concepts of what I’m teaching. She was never going to get help from them. I would help her but I can’t.” 

“No shit!” Johnny rubs his forehead feeling a migraine slowly creeping up. “I’ll handle things here. She seems to need a lot of one-on-one guidance. What you’re teaching her isn’t hard but at the same time it is. Exactly what major is she in?”

“Well, this class is for those who are education majors. Primarily those who want to teach either Elementary or Middle School. Sorry for all this. I really wish I could help.”

“Yeah, I know. I may need to push some things around,” Johnny opens the door to his study. Off to the side a liquor cabinet rests with his favorite brands of wine, brandy and vodka. Putting his phone on speaker he pours himself a glass of vodka. The tension already leaving his body. “If I’m to help her get a B, she’ll need help everyday.” He chugs down the hard liquor wincing as it burns the back of his throat.

“What about Lily?”

Laughing, Johnny plops down into his chair. Your face when Lily ran away from you resurfacing. “Lily got scared of her and ran away. She asked me who she was and then asked if she would be around a lot more,” he smiles gently. “She had such a sour face it was hilarious.”

“So, Lily’s staying strong?” Jaehyun asks gently. 

Swirling the small amount of liquid left in his glass Johnny exhales. “As good as can be expected. She still doesn’t understand what’s going on. Hell, neither do I.”

“Have you heard from —”

Johnny quickly stops him. “No! And I don’t want to talk about her,” he glares at the snug silver ring wrapped around his finger. A daily reminder of the love of his life’s betrayal. “I’m done with her.” He touches the ring, fiddling with it. “I’ve given up. It’s been two years. I need to focus on Lily.” He slides the ring up his finger but pushes it back down. 

“I really am sorry man. I thought she was the one.”

“Me too…”

Looking at the problems you do exactly what Mr. Suh told you to do. Breathe. Take your time. Go through each step slowly. There is no need to rush when it comes to homework. It’s all about understanding the basic fundamentals and building confidence. Solve the problem and get an answer. Check so that you don’t miss anything and especially check to see if you made a mistake and got the answer wrong. Everything seemed to be going great. For once your confidence seemed like it was soaring. Then again…

“Only three right?!” You slam your pencil down onto your small desk in your room. This was useless. For the past two hours you worked hard to try to figure out the problems. Doing exactly as instructed only to end up with three out of seven answers right!

The worst part is that you don’t understand where you got the problems wrong. Which part did you have a hiccup and why you didn’t see it and how you can avoid it for next time. You did everything right. Triple checked to see if you missed a step or did something wrong and yet, the same thing happens. Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!

Closing your book for the night you trudge to your bed plopping down. Tomorrow you’ll ask Mr. Suh where you made a mistake and hopefully he can help you.

Mr. Suh, you try to hold back the smile creeping on your face. After having talked with Jennifer you were for sure going to love and dread spending time with him. Love, getting help and finally seeing your grades turn around for the better — at least that’s what you’re hoping, but also for the eye candy factor. His whole presence just made you feel weak in the knees. The dreadful part, actually having to learn all this bullshit your University was calling Math and the fact that Mr. Suh is a married man. 

“His wife,” you whisper. “Why wasn’t she home too?”

Shrugging, you tear your thoughts away from her unknown whereabouts. Whoever she is she’s most likely beautiful. To find a man as handsome as Mr. Suh, and have a cute daughter like Lily, she’s bound to be a gorgeous woman. Someone who works to help others just like Mr. Suh being a teacher and willing to help you. A power couple and their precious angel.

Rolling over onto your back aggressively, you kick your legs like a child. If only you could find your one true love too. To have what Mr. Suh has. Actually, first, you need to get through Mr. Jeong’s class, then find yourself a job, and then you can worry about finding a man. Just as your eyes start to close your phone dings startling you. An unknown number and a message sits on your Lock Screen, making you spring up.

Next time the cellphone gets turned off when the lesson begins. No distractions while you’re under my tutelage. You can swing by tomorrow around 1PM. We’ll have more time to work. Sleep well. You’ll need it. J.Suh

And boy was he serious when he said you would need sleep. Actually, for the past three weeks he’s been working you like a dog. Having put together and entire binder of what to expect on the Final. What you didn’t understand from all of your quizzes, tests, and the Midterm. A Bible of information completely personalized to suit your needs. Every day you went over to Mr. Suh’s house to get help. When you showed up on Saturday after your first study session, he stated he thinks you should come by every day. Monday through Friday your lessons were from 3PM- 7PM. On Saturday’s, secretly the worst day out of the week, you spent six grueling hours being tutored. Sunday your only saving grace.

Honestly, how a man who teaches all day can have the energy to help your dumbass self is beyond you. But, there was a silver lining. At the end of each day, Mr. Suh would create a tiny three question pop quiz talking about the main concepts he helped you with. And after the first week — a complete travesty, you actually started to grow in confidence. The problems were making sense and with this last pop quiz, you got all the answers right! 

His method of madness was actually working. He taught you something! After that small victory you were positive you could end up learning what Mr. Jeong was teaching and you would find a way to turn your grades around. On the topic of grades, that is one thing Mr. Suh never talked to you about. On three separate occasions you asked him what grade you needed to get on your final in order to pass. He would brush the question off by saying,

‘The final is a long ways from now. Let’s focus on your upcoming test.’ 

However, today is the day you’re getting back your first test since you started getting tutored by Mr. Suh. When you were taking it, you heart started to beat quickly. The numbers and questions becoming blurred and spiraling out of control but thinking about everything you’ve learned you took a deep breath and focused. The whole class was empty by the time you finished. Mr. Jeong waiting patiently as you took up until the bell to complete it. 

Now, you’ll see whether or not your efforts were in vain — that is as soon as Mr. Jeong shuts up and hands you back your damn test! 

“Okay, you can start packing up,” Mr. Jeong places the whiteboard marker down onto his desk. “I’ll be handing back your tests from last week. Please if you have any questions or concerns, feel free to ask me.”

Your leg starts to shake. Your pencil rammed into your mouth. This is it. He makes his way across the first row. One by one you see your classmates expressions. Some surprised, some angry, some…well, you know that look all to well. Defeated. As you stare at each of your classmates your nerves start to take over you. Your whole body tingling with anticipation. Mr. Suh would be in the middle of teaching his second class by now and told you to send him a message about how you did around lunchtime. 

Mr. Jeong stops in front of you. His eyes unreadable. Lips in a hard line. He grabs the corner of your paper flipping it over onto the back before moving onto the next student. Saying a quick prayer you turn the paper over. 

Your whole body becomes numb. A cold sweat spreading over your skin like wildfire. This can’t be happening. Flipping through the pages of your test you go over everything with a fine tooth comb. But it was happening. In very bold and almost threatening letters, ‘stay after,’ was bleeding through the first page onto the second. 

The bell rings and everyone leaves except for you. Again. Not even bothering to pack up your belongings until after Mr. Jeong had a word with you, you wait until the last student leaves his classroom. He wishes them well and closes the door. Gulping you sit up straight. 

“I think we should talk about your test,” Mr. Jeong starts.

“Y-Yes, sir…”

He saunters up to you, once again seeming like the ground is his runway — pulls out the chair in front of you and sits down. Combing his fingers through his hair he shows you something you never expected to see. A huge smile with his dimples on display. 

“Congrats!” He leans back into the chair. “You did a wonderful job!”

“Wonderful?!” You scoff. “I got a C- practically a D! How is that wonderful?!” You point to the paper. “After all this work I thought I would for sure get an A this time.”

Laughing, Mr. Jeong turns his face to hide his rather beautiful smile. Something else you would have never expected to see from him. 

“Trust me. You did a wonderful job. You can’t expect in such a short time to see massive results. You should feel proud of yourself.” He rests his hands on your desk. “Seriously, this is making me feel that you won’t have to take this course again next semester.”

“That would be a gift from God himself,” you mumble only to realize what you said. “Ah! S-Sorry Mr. Jeong, it’s just —”

“I understand. When I had to learn how to teach this course I wanted to run away myself. It’s not easy and I know it’s hard to learn. I’m just glad you’re doing better.”

“Well, it’s thanks to you and Mr. Suh. I owe everything to the two of you.”

“Speaking of Mr. Suh, how is everything?”

“Great!” You beam at him. “Mr. Suh went through all of my old tests and quizzes and pointed out where I made mistakes. How to solve the problems and how to find my errors,” you bring out the binder he created for you. “He’s gone above and beyond anything I’ve ever experienced and I’m so grateful for that.” 

Mr. Jeong takes a look at the binder his eyes widening. You were right. This was going above and beyond the call of duty. Scanning over the little quizzes he’s even given you, Mr. Jeong’s happy demeanor starts to fade. He was happy you were doing better, but at the same time he knows full well he would have never thought of doing this for you or any of his students. 

“Impressive,” he clears his throat. “I’ll have to treat Johnny to a beer or two for his help.” He hands you back the binder. “So, everything is okay? He’s treating you nicely?”

“Oh, yes! He’s very nice! I’m truly grateful for all the help he’s given me.”

Nodding, Mr. Jeong leans forward. “I’m happy for you. I do want to apologize for not trying to do something to help you sooner.”

“No. It’s totally fine. It was my fault. I should have asked for help, or asked questions in class — something so that my grades didn’t fall to this point. Oh! Mr. Jeong, I’ve been wondering, exactly what grade do I need to get on my final in order to pass your class? Mr. Suh keeps avoiding the question which is making me a little nervous.”

“Oh, uh,” Mr. Jeong turns from you his eyes trembling. “I think if Mr. Suh wants you to focus on your studies that’s what you need to worry about. The final is still some time away.”

Pouting you glare at him. “It’s going to be impossible for me to pass this class isn’t it?”

“No, it’s just going to take a lot of work,” he rubs the back of his neck. “If you want, we can get a better look at your grades and what you need to do in order to pass this class.”

“Yes, please!”

“Well, I’m free for this break period. Unless you have a class.”

“Nope. My next class doesn’t start until 11.” 

“Great, follow me then.”

Quickly you pack up your belongings into your backpack and follow Jaehyun through the hallway where people were coming and going to their classes. As you make your way through the halls you notice that people are staring your way with strange gazes. They weren’t shocked, or angry, more like perplexed with a dash of spite. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why. 

Jeong Jaehyun, Mr. Jeong, the campus hottie. The Professor every girl and woman wishes to have but only those in the Education department ever get. Joy and rapture. Walking beside him you glance up to see his side profile. He is very handsome. Eyes laser focused on the path he’s walking. Shoulders straight, broad, with a natural sway that shows nothing but confidence. Even his strides excude confidence. Upon further inspection he dresses nicely as well. 

On most occasions he wears a button down white shirt, black slacks, with black shoes and a gold watch. Very simple yet on him, luxurious. The only person you think that can compete with such a simple style is Mr. Suh. Laughing to yourself you see how they became friends. They have a similar aura about them but Mr. Suh is a lot easier to be around. Then again, it’s probably because he’s not your Professor and you’re not terrified of failing his class.

“Exactly how long are you going to stare at me?” Mr. Jeong asks you a playful tone in his voice. 

“E-Eh?! Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to stare.” 

Keeping your eyes down at your feet you walk a few steps behind him ashamed of your ogling. It wasn’t like you to stare at someone so shamelessly. Then to be caught red handed, the embarrassment sweeping over you is all consuming. 

“I don’t mind the staring,” Mr. Jeong continues. “I get stared at all the time.”

“I’m sorry, sir. I really didn’t mean to stare.”

“Please, class is over. You can call me Jaehyun.”

Stopping dead in your tracks you stare at your Professor. There is no way in hell you can call him, Jaehyun. You are his student and he the teacher. It would be improper. 

“I don’t think I can,” you chuckle nervously.

“When you’re with Johnny, what do you call him?”

“Mr. Suh.”

“All the time?”

Nodding you smile. “He is my tutor after all. He’s there to help me. Not to be my friend. Plus, he’s already taking a good chunk of his time to help me instead of spending it with his wife and daughter.”

“His wife?” Mr. Jeong walks up to you. “What do you mean his wife?” He grabs you by your shoulders.

“U-Uh, well I haven’t seen her at all, but he has a wedding band.”

Sighing in relief Mr. Jeong releases your shoulders. “Oh, okay. Sorry about that.” He scratches the back of his neck. “Has Johnny talked to you about his wife?”

“No, she never comes up in conversation. Actually, nothing personal has come up at all. It’s strictly school work and studying.”

Nodding Mr. Jeong starts walking again, heading down the stairs. The light atmosphere surrounding the two of you long gone the moment you mentioned Mr. Suh’s wife. Was she a sensitive topic? For the last three weeks you’ve wondered why each night you never saw her. By the time your tutoring sessions ended it was 7PM, she would have at least come home by then. 

A thought strikes across your mind. What if she’s sick? What if she can’t get out of bed and that’s the reason you’ve never seen her. Slowly your heart sinks to the pit of your stomach. Mr. Suh’s wife lying in bed ill. Not able to play with her precious daughter, or spend time with her husband in their beautiful home — at least what you’ve seen of it. Smiling brightly you plan out something just for her. A gift that will hopefully brighten her day. 

Holding open the door to the side of the building, Mr. Jeong allows you to walk outside first. “Mr. Jeong,” you keep up with his pace. “What type of woman is Mr. Suh’s wife?”

“She, uh,” he starts fumbling over his words. A strange sight for the suave Professor everyone adores. “Wh-Why do you want to know?”

“I want to get her something. I can only assume that since I’ve never seen her she must be sick, right? I can’t imagine what Mr. Suh must be going through. Juggling work, his daughter, his wife, and now me. He truly is a saint.”

“No. You’ve got it all wrong,” he grabs your wrist stopping you. “Johnny, his wife, she’s not sick.”

Your heart that was wading in the dark depths of your stomach instantly bounces back to its proper place. “Well that’s wonderful news! I still want to thank her for sharing her husband. I know all this tutoring must be an inconvenience for her. I was thinking of getting her chocolates and flowers. Does that sound like a good idea?”

Shaking his head Mr. Jeong runs a stressful hand through his hair. “No. It doesn’t. She won’t get them.”

“Why won’t she?”

“She left. She’s gone. Don’t ever bring her up in front of Johnny or Lily.”

Gasping you cover your mouth with your hands. “Sh-She died?!”

Sighing, Mr. Jeong grabs your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours he leads you straight to the student center. The stares that you receive inside the Mathematics building has now tripled. Mr. Jeong’s eyes glaring ahead making everyone part way as if he were Moses and they the Red Sea. Looking down at your hands intertwined with his, your heart skips a beat. This was inappropriate, especially on campus. If someone saw you and asked you what the hell was with the hand holding how would you explain it?

Trying to tug your hand away from his he holds onto you tighter. Glancing back at you for a second, brows furrowed and his lips in the tightest line they all but disappeared. He was in no mood for you to try to escape. Letting go of the possibility of walking next to him you get tugged along like an insolent child. 

Straight into the Student Center you’re taken into the elevator where he keeps a firm hold of your hand. Only when the elevator reaches the third floor does he let go — his peers and other campus staff becoming visible. Greeting everyone whom he sees cheerfully he takes you back to his office. Opening the door he tells you to have a seat at the available chair in front of his desk. Quickly sitting you hold your backpack against your chest terrified of what he’s going to say to you. He takes a seat exhaling deeply, eyes and face looking exhausted. 

“You don’t have to look so scared.” He slides into his desk facing you.

“You looked like you were going to yell at me any second while you dragged me across campus.”

“I’m sorry about that. I just needed to get you to a quiet secluded place before I continued our conversation.”

“Why did it need to be quiet and secluded?”

“The whole campus doesn’t need to know about my best friend’s problems. Plus, you know people around here. Whether they have the whole story or not what they hear they talk about. Now, what I’m going to tell you needs to stay between the two of us. I will know if you tell anyone because no one and I repeat no one knows Johnny, and no one knows what is going on in his life. So if I hear his name or his daughter’s name and what is going on I will fail you!”

“Isn’t that blackmail?” You tilt your head. “Also, I’m pretty sure you can’t fail me without a legitimate reason.” Mr. Jeong stares at you blankly. He really wasn’t in the mood for lighthearted jokes. “I’m sorry. I understand.”

“Johnny and Lily were left behind by his wife and her mother. One night while he was in his study she packed a bag and left without telling him where she would was going and for how long. It was right after Lily’s third birthday. She’s now five. They haven’t heard a word from her for over two years. He’s sensitive when it comes to her. 

“If you think he’s married it means he still has his wedding band on. For the last year he’s told me he’s done with her. He’s done waiting and that he doesn’t want to see or hear from her ever again, but if you saw that he still has his ring on — that means he’s still holding onto the hope that she’ll come back. Lily doesn’t remember her mom that much, but she does ask about her. If she asks you don’t tell her anything. Johnny’s told her that she is sick and in a special hospital.”

“Why doesn’t he tell her the truth?”

“She’s five. She wouldn’t understand.”

“Still, when she gets older and the ‘mom is sick and in the hospital’ story stops working what will he do then? Tell his daughter that her father is a liar. So not only did her mother ditch her but now her father is a liar.”

He shakes his head sighing. “You’re young, you don’t understand.”

“Mr. Jeong, I may be young, but I’m not stupid. My father has kept me a secret from his entire family. Apparently their super religious who at the time that he ran away were two seconds from joining a cult. He told me right away when I was old enough to understand why I couldn’t see his family. I’ve only grown up with my mom’s side. 

“For years they had to repeat the story until it sunk in, but they were honest. If I had questions they let me ask them no matter how many times they had to answer the same questions. Lily is young now, but she is five years old. What will Mr. Suh do when she realizes that her father can’t keep telling her that mommy is in the hospital and him not taking her to see her once. She’s going to realize that.”

“I’m sorry to hear about your family,” Mr. Jeong looks at you bewildered. “I understand your point, but she’s his daughter.”

Mr. Jeong was right. Neither he or you or anyone else had the right to tell Mr. Suh how to raise his own child. He knows what’s best for her. If he thinks she’s still too young to understand it is in her best interest to keep things a secret. Plus, his wife may one day come back into her life. It probably is better for her to be left in the dark for now.

“Do you believe she’ll ever come back?”

“I hope she doesn’t. He’s my best friend. I watched a man who was living out his dream life with the woman he loves come crashing down to earth without a parachute. All because of her selfishness. So, no. I don’t want her back. She’ll only hurt him and leave him again when things get tough.”

“Being a wife and mother was too much for her?”

“No one knows. She never talked to anyone at all about what she was going through. Not even Johnny.” 

“Do you think Lily would like some flowers and chocolates then?” A smile comes to your face. “I have been borrowing her dad for the past three weeks. I feel terrible for taking up so much of his time.”

Leaning back in his chair, Mr. Jeong smiles sweetly. Dimples on full view, eyes sparkling with something you can’t quite pinpoint. “I think she would love that.”

“Okay. I’ll be sure to head out and get some goodies for her before I go over to his house today. Now, about my grades…”

When lunch came around you sent a photo of your grade with a text saying that Mr. Jeong was very proud of you. Putting your phone up to charge you head off to take a small nap before you go out and look for some flowers and chocolates for Lily, and even something for Mr. Suh to show your appreciation.

Now knowing why you haven’t seen his wife you can’t help but wonder why she left in the first place. Their home is beautiful, Lily from the small glances you’ve seen of her before she scurries away — apparently still cautious of you, is a lovely child and she’s cute as a button! Mr. Suh is, well, delectable, so why did she leave?

Trying not to dwell too much on Mrs. Suh’s absence, you head off to dreamland hoping to get some rest before another grueling day of studying. But, instead of getting a decent rest, your brain apparently concocted a very intense and wet dream. Starring none other than Mr. Suh.

It started out like a normal tutoring session. You were trying your best to solve a problem, but kept messing up. Mr. Suh in his usual lounge wear, a loose fitted shirt — exposing just enough of his chest to have you drooling, leans over to you giving you a chance to be wrapped in the heavenly aroma of his cologne. As he helps you to solve the problem you can feel his breath tickling your neck. His lips feel so close that you swear he presses them against your skin, but he never laid a hand on you. 

Once he was finished explaining he waited patiently until you finished. Eyes watching you carefully, roaming up and down your face when you meet his gaze. His irises seemed darker, pupils dilated, and mouth ajar as he bit his pen gently between his beautiful white teeth. 

Feeling shy you get back to your work when a hand on your thigh makes you look up, only to meet Mr. Suh’s lips. A whimper escapes you. His large strong hands cupping your face keeping you close to him. Lips smacking against each other’s, you melted into the kiss and his touch. One hand traveling down your body until it reaches your waist. Gripping you tightly he pulls you over to him. Half your body dangling over his lap. 

“Sit on my lap.” He tells you between kisses. “I want to feel you on top of me.”

As you clammer to your feet going to straddle him your alarm blared loudly before you had a chance to finish the dream. Sitting up in your bed, body sticky with sweat, you opt to take a quick shower and change into more comfortable clothes. A nice cold shower should get your mind out of the gutter. 

Once fully dried and and no longer thinking of fucking your tutor, you change into a pair of distressed blue denim jeans and a loose gray hoodie before grabbing your phone, keys, purse, and backpack to head out and get Lily and Mr. Suh something special. On your way out your door you hear a ding from your phone. 

Great job! 

I’m so proud of you and I hope you’re proud of yourself too! I’m thinking something special should be done to commemorate this momentous occasion.  We’ll need to think of something together. See you later. J. Suh

You can’t help the bright smile spreading across your face as you merrily skip down the hallway to the staircase. Feeling like you just won the lottery you truly feel proud of yourself. Both Mr. Suh and Mr. Jeong, praising you for your efforts. There was no doubt in your mind. You have to find something nice to thank Mr. Suh for everything that he’s done.

Thanks to Mr. Jeong you knew which kind of chocolates to get Lily and what kind of flowers were her favorite. The Best Uncle of the Year, his words exactly, coming in handy with loads of information. It didn’t take long to shop around for Lily, but what the Best Friend of the Year, another term he boldly stated, didn’t do was help you with Mr. Suh. Stating clearly, ‘he’ll be appreciative of anything you get him.’ 

So, you decided to get him some flowers too, a small assortment, and some chocolates of his very own. Fancier chocolates that your parents love to nibble on every now and then. Men like chocolate too, you assert in your mind. 

Driving over to Mr. Suh’s you can’t help but feel antsy. Feeling nervous about interacting with Lily makes your stomach churn painfully. She’s made sure to keep her distance from you. Eyeing you skeptically whenever she does grace you with her presence. Time and time again, Mr. Suh tries to get her to say hi to you properly but to no avail.

This doesn’t help solidify your dream job of being an Elementary teacher. Especially when an Elementary school aged child wants nothing to do with you. 

Pulling up to Mr. Suh’s house you see his car in the driveway. Your heart starts beating faster as you gather everything — putting your purse safely in the trunk since you won’t be needing it inside his house. Trying your best to hold the two small bouquets, you duck walk up to the front door. Before you can even ring the bell, Mr. Suh opens it with a bright smile on his face.

“Welcom—” he stops staring at you. “What in the world…”

“Uh, I uh,” you fiddangle the bouquets holding the one out for him. “I wanted to say thank you for helping me. Without your help I would never have gotten that C and I would probably be swimming in a sea of failure rethinking my life choices and career right now. So, I uh, just got these to say thank you. Ummm.. th-thank you!” 

Blinking, he bounces from your face then to the flowers. Not making any attempt at reaching for them. Just like on the first day, a single strand of sweat trickles down the side of your face. This was a terrible idea. A card would have sufficed. A thank you for tolerating my dumbass for the past three weeks card and maybe a gift card to a restaurant. But no, you didn’t think of that. 

Lowering the bouquet you turn in the direction of the trash can that was sitting out by the curb for tomorrow. “Th-This was stupid, huh?” Your face starts burning up. “I-I’ll just dispose of these.” 

Turning around you head down the two steps to the pathway leading down to the driveway. Halfway down the path you're whipped around and wrapped in a tight hug. The flowers becoming squished in the process. Looking up at the person engulfing you in a constrictor hug you find Mr. Suh. Becoming stiff as a statue you glance around wondering if this is your mind playing tricks on you or if it is indeed real. After that dream you had this surely couldn’t be real. 

���Don’t throw them out,” he whispers, holding you even tighter. 

“O-Okay,” you murmur, body starting to relax. “S-So you like them?”

Chuckling he pulls away from you enough to look down into your eyes. “I love them. It was very thoughtful of you.”

Managing to shove them higher you put on a bright smile. “Well, then these are for you Mr. Suh! I also bought you some chocolates. My mom and dad like these. I always get it for them for their anni —” you stop yourself. “Sp-Special occasions. Or when I want something from them.” You turn your almost blunder into a joke. “I also have some flowers and chocolates for Lily. Mr. Jeong told me what her favorites are.”

Again you’re wrapped into a tight embrace. Mr. Suh’s body hunching over until his face is buried in your neck. “Thank you,” he pulls you close to him. “Thank you.”

Proud of yourself for the second time today you wrap your arms around your tutor. How long has it been since someone other than family or Mr. Jeong showed him kindness? How long has it been since they thought to do something for him and his daughter? Hearing a sniff your ears perk up. 

“Mr. Suh?”

Stepping away from you he quickly wipes his eyes. “Ahh, that’s embarrassing,” he chuckles. “Don’t worry about me. It’s just been a while.”

“Daddy?” A small voice comes from the door. “Daddy!”

“What is it sweetheart?” He quickly leaves your side rushing over to Lily. 

Taking in a huge breath holding it in as you make your approach to the Princess of the mansion. You get down on your haunches and show her the bouquet of flowers.

“Hi Lily, we haven’t really met each other yet.” She goes behind Mr. Suh looking around his legs at you. Introducing yourself, you reach out the flowers towards her. “A little birdie told me that your favorite flowers are Tiger Lilies. Is this true?”

The moment she looks down at the flowers her little eyes light up. Slowly letting go of Mr. Suh’s legs, she comes in front of you. Looking up at her dad he laughs happily.

“They’re for you, sweetheart,” he pats her head.

Reaching out she takes the bouquet smelling each flower her tiny nose can reach. “I love these,” she wraps her arms around the flowers.

“I also heard you like Snickers,” you pull out some candy for her. 

Again her eyes light up. “I love them too!!” She squeals while taking the chocolate. “Daddy look!”

“I see. Now what do we say when we receive a gift?”

“Thank you!”

“You’re welcome.”

“Go on inside and we’ll put these flowers in some water,” he shoos Lily inside. 

“Okay!”

Running off she leaves the two of you alone. Standing back up, you can’t help but smile lovingly at the little girl. She really is cute. 

“Thank you for this,” Mr. Suh calls you to attention. “I haven’t seen her this happy in a while. It really means a lot to me.”

“Well, I just figured I should surprise her and give her something because I am borrowing her dad. I know you’d rather spend your time with your daughter and relaxing after work, but because of me you can’t do that for a while.” 

“It’s not all bad,” he walks into his home and you follow. “Having you around these last three weeks has been fun.”

“Liar.” 

Mr. Suh lets out a hardy laugh while you both head into the kitchen. Sitting your bag down at the table like usual you watch him and his daughter put the flowers you gave them in some water. Then, Mr. Suh giving Lily some of her candy you brought her. But what shocked you is when she came running up to you with her arms open wide.

“I love my presents! Thank you!” She hugs you. Stunned you barely have time to hug her back before she lets you go running off to play. 

“Wow…” you look back at Mr. Suh. “I thought she hated me.”

“No way! She’s been curious about you. She asks me questions most nights before she goes to sleep.”

“She does?” Shocked, you stare in the direction she left in.

“Yes,” Mr. Suh sits down with a cup of coffee and he ever so politely brings you one as well. “She’s very cautious. We don’t have many visitors. Most of the family is a good distance away from us.” He takes a sip, his body relaxing. “The only time we see them is during the holiday’s. Shame really. She has cousins around her age but she barely gets to spend time with them.”

“Have you ever thought of moving?”

What the hell are you saying?! You curse yourself. 

“I have but this is the only home she knows. Plus,” he fiddles with his wedding band. “I’m still holding out for something.”

Staring down at his ringed finger fire burns inside of you. How can a woman be so selfish to leave the man she loved hanging by a thread? If she wanted to leave, okay. But you just don’t up and leave and never come back and don’t officially break things off! That is cowardly and selfish! 

“Anytime Lily wants to hang out, I’m available,” you try to bring the subject back to something lighter. “I think as long as I give her candy I’ll be on her good side, right?” 

“Bribery, already?” He looks stunned. “You’re not even a teacher yet and you’re resorting to such tactics.”

Stunned, you stare at him with wide eyes. “A-A teacher? How did you know?”

“Jaehyun. The course he’s teaching is for Education majors, is it not?”

“Right,” you scratch the back of your neck. “Forgot about that. Oh! Mr. Jeong said he may owe you one or two beers for helping me. Make sure he keeps that promise!”

Pulling out your holy binder of math, you get things ready for today's lesson.

“Actually,” Mr. Suh places his hand on top of yours. “Why don’t we skip today’s lesson? We should celebrate your accomplishment.”

“Accomplishment? I got a C-, that means ‘C better luck next time.’”

Laughing, Mr. Suh shakes his head. “Well I see it as ‘C, she can be taught.’ So, listen to your tutor. We’re taking a break today.”

“A break...” You nod sitting back in the chair. “O-Oh! A break! I’m sorry! You probably have something planned for Lily!” Quickly you start packing your backpack. “I’m sorry, I should have read between the lines. I’ll hurry up so you two can spend the evening together.”

“Stop!” Mr. Suh’s voice booms in your ears, startling you. “Like I said earlier, we need to celebrate your accomplishment.” Standing up, he starts to walk away. “Come, follow me.” 

Gulping, your palms turning sweaty you ring them on your jeans before standing up. Mr. Suh leads you back into the living room and this time you have a chance to really look around. Everything was immaculate. White carpet with white furniture. A black stoned fireplace. A large flat screen tv sitting above it. A few plants in the corners of the room and a couple on the coffee table and end tables. Something you would see out of a magazine. Not really a homey touch. Something that seems to fit his style more so than a style that suits a home with a little girl. 

Leaving the living room you’re taken down a corridor to a room where he opens the door with a key. Placing the key back into his pocket your heart starts to beat faster. What in the world could he be hiding? A room that needs to be locked! Thinking back on the movie Fifty Shades of Grey you slowly start to back away. Afraid that Mr. Suh has some weird fetish that he’s about to unleash on you — however, you’re taken aback when the room turns out to be a normal study. 

Slumping forward your heart slows down. Thank goodness…

“It’ll just be a small glass,” he holds the door open for you. “I thought we could celebrate with some wine. You’re old enough to drink, right?”

Glaring you turn to his direction. “I’ve been able to drink for a while now, Mr. Suh. Do I really look that young?”

Chuckling he goes into a cabinet taking out two wine glasses. “You do actually. You still have that ‘the world is my oyster’ glow about you. Go on, pick one.”

“I don’t know wines. I know beer but not wine.”

Snorting he shakes his head. “College days,” he grabs a bottle of red wine pouring you a smaller glass than himself. “You’ll learn when you’re older.”

“You’re not that much older, Mr. Suh. And yet you speak like you’re well into your forties.”

Sitting down on the couch in his study he lets out a huge tired sigh. “Some days it feels like I’m pushing fifty.”

Joining him at the opposite end making sure you don’t intrude on his space you take a small sip. The taste making you cringe slightly but it was smoothe going down. The last wine you had was like drinking tanbark — woody with a dryness of a desert. This held a tinge of sweetness.

“What’s it like to be a dad?” 

“Pardon?” He looks at you surprised. 

“Sorry for the sudden question,” you giggle realizing it was really an out of the blue question. “I just mean, Lily is awfully cute. I don’t have any friends who are already parents. I know personally I want three kids one day. A boy, a girl, and then to adopt or foster a child. That’s been my goal since I was a kid. Perhaps I should have asked, what’s it like to be a parent?”

“Hard.” He stirs the liquid in his glass. “People who don’t have children see the good and bad moments. When the child is well behaved or is so cute you can’t help but fall in love. You want a child right then and there. Vow to the world and everyone around you that you want a houseful of them. 

“Then, there are times when no matter what, you can’t get your kid to stop crying. Or, they misbehave and you don’t know what to do and how to correct the behavior. They scream and throw things and have tantrums in public and it’s embarrassing. People blame the parents right away saying they need to do better. That’s the hard part. People assume you’re not doing a good job but you’re doing the best you can. What works with one child doesn’t work with the other. You can’t use blueprints for a museum to build a shed. 

“So you need to rethink your game plan and just when you think you have everything figured out, BOOM!” He shouts startling you. “Your kid changes the game. But I wouldn’t want to think of a world where Lily isn’t in it. She’s the best thing that has ever happened to me. She’ll always be the best thing that’s happened to me. She’s taught me how to love someone unconditionally. To know that if she is in trouble I will willingly throw my life away to protect her. The moment I held her in my arms for the first time was the moment I knew I would and will die for her.”

“Wow…that was…beautiful.” 

Mr. Suh turns to you to see you looking at him in awe. Snickering he takes a sip of his wine, a light flush coming to his cheeks. “You’ll know how it feels when you become a mother.”

“I hope I will. And what about being a teacher?”

Smirking, he slides down on the couch. “The first year is hard. The second year is still hard but you sort of know what to expect. By your third year you’ll be a pro. It’s a job that not everyone can do but those who do it know how amazing it truly is. Oh, a piece of advice — keep your lesson plans for five years at a time. That’s what one of my professors told me. After five years redo them. That way it’s one less thing you have to worry about. Creating lesson plans is a pain, so anyway you can relieve that will always be beneficial for you.” Nodding you keep this tidbit of advice locked in your memory. “Pray tell, why did you choose the teaching profession?”

Shrugging you take a sip of your wine. “I’ve always loved school. I like being in school and learning. I would help out any chance I could get. I was even able to leave and help out the other school staff since I got done with my work quickly. When I was in High School a couple teachers said I’d make the perfect teacher so I listened to them and here I am. Failing miserably…”

“You’re not failing miserably. You’re just failing right now.”

You roll your eyes. “Geez…thanks, Mr. Suh.”

Laughing he places his glass on the end table closest to him before shifting closer to you. “From now on you can call me Johnny.”

“You too? Man you and Mr. Jeong really are cut from the same cloth.”

“What about Jaehyun?”

“He wanted me to call him by his first name too. I mean yeah I’ve spoken to him a few times because of this whole tutoring thing but not enough to feel comfortable calling him by his first name. Plus, it would cross the lines of the student teacher dynamic.”

“Maybe he wants you to feel comfortable around him.” Mr. Suh peers down at you. 

Snorting, you take another small sip of your wine. “If he wants me to feel comfortable he needs to stop making everywhere he goes look like he’s on a runway.”

Cracking up Mr. Suh places a hand on your knee to hold himself up. The small gesture making your body numb with hope that he won’t remove his hand too soon. Visions of your dream springing to life in your mind. How he wanted you to sit on his lap. How you were seconds from kissing him. Gulping you see him wiping his eyes. 

“So he still hasn’t broken that habit?”

“Habit?”

“Back when we were in college, Jaehyun was the ‘it boy,’ on campus. All the girls wanted him. It was crazy. He never paid them any mind but he was aware of the magnetism he held. He started running a hand through his hair and would hear girls screaming their heads off. He’d bite his lip, smirk, and show his dimples — all to give them just a taste of attention, but he would never go further than that.”

Leaning closer to Mr. Suh you ask him a question you never thought you’d ask. “Is Mr. Jeong…you know…into guys?”

Staring flabbergasted, Mr. Suh pushes your forehead back with his index finger. “I would never bring up men around Jaehyun again. No. Believe me. He has no interest in men.” Mr. Suh looks you up and down for a second before chugging the rest of his wine. “Trust me.”

“Sorry if I was offensive. It’s just the way you were talking made it seem like he was teasing people because he knew they would never have his heart.”

“That’s exactly what he did. But not because he’s gay. Jaehyun,” he sighs. “He’s a strange man. One second he seems head over heels for someone, the next, he’s flirting with someone else. I think the prospect of settling down with someone scares him. So he gives them an inch and hopes they don’t take a mile. But they always do and he leaves them.”

“So, Mr. Jeong is scared to be in a relationship?”

“In a manner of speaking.”

“Wow, I feel bad for him.”

Chuckling, Mr. Suh sits back intrigued. “Since we’re talking openly for once. What about you, my dear student? Any boys you’re interested in? Or should I ask about girls too?” He winks.

“Guys. That’s it for me.” Your face starts to warm. “There is one person…” you fiddle with your fingers. “They’re super smart, handsome, kind, and I don’t know…I just love being around them. I still have a lot to learn but I’m hoping one day I’ll be given the chance to get to know them better.”

“Anyone I know?” He nudges you, winking.

“E-Eh?!” 

Fear quickens your heartbeat. You tried to be as vague as humanly possible. There is no way that he can tell you’re talking about him. Handsome, smart, kind — qualities that can describe half of the world! No way in hell could he narrow it down to himself. 

“Come now, you can tell me. It’s Jaehyun, isn’t it?”

“Wh-What?!” You squeak.

“Everyone falls for him. It’s a natural thing. No need to be shy about it.”

“Mr. Suh, really I —”

“Johnny.” He corrects.

“J-John…Mr. Suh!”

“Come on, it’s not that hard. John…ny…” he says his name slowly.

“I’m not an imbecile!” You put down your glass. “And I don’t have feelings for Mr. Jeong! The person I was talking about was you —” freezing you try to come up with a different response. “You…you’ll never know! A woman’s heart is a land of mystery. It’s a secret!”

Mr. Suh stares at you. Eyes scanning over your features. Hoping that your trembling body won’t catch his attention. How could you have been so stupid? You are an imbecile! You almost let it slip that you have feelings for your tutor! Hell you don’t even know what kind of feelings you have for him. Lust? Hell yeah. Infatuation? Definitely! Pity? Only for Lily. Like? S-Sure... 

Turning away from his gaze you wipe your hands on your jeans. “I’m sorry for shouting. You’ve been kind to me this entire time. I owe everything to you. I just got…defensive…”

“No. I should apologize. I didn’t intend to press you to that point. But I have to ask,” he moves closer to you, his hand gently resting under your chin. Turning your head to face him he stares deep into your eyes. “Is this secret person…me?”

Sitting in the passenger seat you stare out the window. Mr. Suh sent you a message on Friday that stated Lily was sick and he needed to take care of her so tutoring was off, but to come on Saturday, today, which you’re not particularly excited for. The unbeknownst blessing of not having lessons yesterday was that your car was in the shop and there was no one to take you to your lesson. 

Granted, the garage still hasn't looked at your car yet, promising to have it done by tomorrow around lunch — Doyoung has offered to drive you to Mr. Suh’s since Jen has practice. Sighing, you rest your head against the window.

“What’s up with you? Thought this tutor of yours was helping you.”

“He is. I actually got a passing grade last time.” 

“Then what’s the problem?”

“Have you ever met someone that you’ve instantly liked? You may not know them but there is this undying attraction to them?”

“He’s hot isn't he?” Doyoung snickers. 

“Yes. Like just my type. He’s tall, muscular but not overly buff, he has the cutest lips. Like they remind me of a cat and he’s gentle and sweet. You should see him with his daughter and —”

“Hold up!” Doyoung slows down at the red light before glancing your way. “He’s a dad?”

“Yeah. His daughter's name is Lily and she’s so cute!”

“No.”

“No?”

“Whatever you’re thinking, stop.”

“What if I’m not thinking about anything?”

“I’ve known you our whole lives. You don’t just randomly bring up the topic of liking someone without reason. If he has a child he isn’t someone you need to worry about.”

“Why not?”

“He needs to focus on raising his kid, not getting his dick wet.” He says bluntly. 

Turning to him, shocked by his choice of words Doyoung just shrugs as he proceeds forward. “Did you have to say that?!”

“You’re blushing aren’t you? How many dreams have you had about fucking him?”

“None!” You shriek but then start mumbling. “I always wake up before the good stuff.”

“Why would you put yourself through this? He’s a father. He’s your tutor. Once the semester is done and over with you won’t see him again. He’s older and you’re still in college. Why?”

“Because…because…” you sigh, turning back to the window. “I don’t know.”

“Does he know?”

Groaning, you bang your head against the window, “yeah...”

“How did he find out?”

Staring out into the traffic you drift back to that evening in Mr. Suh’s study…

‘Turning your head to face him he stares deep into your eyes. “Is this secret person…me?’

“Wh-What?! Mr. Suh…” you turn from him, your face growing warmer. “Wh-What makes you ask that kind of question? You’re my tutor…”

“Because on the first day you clearly told someone you thought I was hot.” He says matter of factly. 

“Eh?! S-S-So you did look at my phone!”

“I had to look at it to turn it off. And yes, the message in very large print clearly stated that your friend wanted a picture.”

“Sh-She was just joking! I swear! She’s very blunt.”

“So the message you sent was in regards to me being hot?” He quirks a brow. 

“No! I mean…yes…I mean…”

Moving away from you Mr. Suh runs a hand through his hair. “It’s best for you not to like me.”

Feeling a sharp pain hit your heart you look at him as if someone told you your dog passed away. Bewildered. Heartbroken. “Wh-Why?” You attempt to ask firmly but the quivering in your jaw prevents you. 

Chuckling he crosses his long legs. Arms settling across his chest. “I’m married.” He holds up his ring finger. “No point in crushing on a married man. Plus, I have a child. I don’t have the time or energy to deal with a small infatuation.”

A small infatuation?! Glaring at him he looks completely disinterested in your unwilling confession. What you feel is not a small infatuation! It’s not puppy love or displaced affection! And for him to sit here nonchalantly like your presence annoys him…you could just…just…

Pushing yourself to your feet you march in front of him. He’s married? Ha! If only he knew that you knew his wife left not only him but his daughter. Over her, he’s still holding onto some kind of hope! Why would he do that?! She left him! She’s gone, most likely never to come back! Holding on to hope will only hurt him in the end and Lily! And his daughter…so what?! All of this is a means of deflecting!

“It’s not a small infatuation. I’m not a teenager. I know what and how I am feeling. Yes, I sent a text message to my friend saying that you were hot. If you haven’t noticed at all, you’re incredibly hot! The hottest man I’ve ever seen! Not once did I feel any amount of attraction to anyone I’ve been in school with, that is until you came along! Do you think I wanted to have a crush on my tutor? Do you know how hard it is to focus sometimes?

“Also, I clearly noted the wedding ring on your finger. But I’m also aware that —” you pause. “I’m…” Calm down…breathe… Taking a huge inhale you let the air fill your lungs. Simmering down the anger that was building up inside you. “I’m also aware that just because you’re married doesn’t mean you can’t have feelings for someone else. Sadly we’re not a species that has only one love for the rest of our life. I believe only a couple of species on the planet are like that.”

“So what do you suggest?” Mr. Suh reaches up grabbing your wrists. “You want me to cheat on my wife?” He yanks you down. Your body falling on top of his. “Is that what you want me to do?” He grabs your legs and easily moves you so you’re straddling his lap. 

“Wh-What are you doing?” You try to move away from him but he holds you firmly in his arms. 

Pressing his lips against your ear — unfortunately sending shivers down your spine and a spark of fire to your core he firmly states, “answer the question.”

“N-No…”

“No, you don’t want to answer the question or no, you don’t want me to cheat?”

“Both!”

Arms falling to the couch he allows you to crawl off of him. Moving as far away from him as possible you wait until your heart calms down. The moment you waited for. The moment you’ve fantasized about did not pan out how you truly wanted it to. You were mere seconds from telling him you knew about his wife. The only way you could have known is from Mr. Jeong, and by no means we’re you going to get him in trouble.

“I think I should go.” You get up heading for the door. “Forget I even mentioned anything.”

“Wait!” Stopping as your feet barely cross over the threshold you glance over your shoulder. “I’m sorry.” Mr. Suh apologizes with his head low to his chest. “I-I didn’t mean…”

“Wh-What?” You turn completely to look at him. Hands interlaced together tightly. Knuckles turning white as snow. His hair hanging over his eyes making him look more apologetic. More ashamed… “M-Mr. Suh?” You call gently. 

His hands unclasp, one reaching up to wipe his eyes. Without thinking you spring over to him. Startling him as you push his shoulders back until they’re resting on the back of the couch — eyes red and tear stained. Straddling his lap you plant a gentle kiss on his lips. His body freezes beneath you but you pay it no mind. This is what you’ve wanted. To feel what it would be like to kiss him. To feel his body pressed against yours. 

Leaving soft comforting kiss after kiss, his hands find purchase on your waist. Slowly he starts to kiss you back. His lips moving along with yours tentatively. Unsure and if this is right. But when a groan coming from the back of his throat pierces your ears you kiss him deeper. Opening your mouth for his tongue to enter. 

It doesn’t take long for the kiss to grow steamy. Your body burning up from the inside out. Stomach churning to the sounds coming from your tutor. Low growls that tell you he’s holding back with all his might. Wanting to feel all of him you take matters into your own hands. As his tongue slips into your mouth you quickly wrap your lips around it, sucking on the wet slippery muscle. Giving him a taste of what it would be like on another part of his body. His hands grip your waist tightly. Eyes closed shut. Brows furrowed while you work your magic. His face, his expressions, the noises he’s making driving you forward to do more. Much much more.

With one final loud suck of his tongue you pull back. Chest heaving heavily you attack his neck. Biting, nipping, kissing and sucking on the taught flesh. Grazing your tongue across his Adam’s apple has him pushing you onto your back. Now hovering over you he stares down at you with wild eyes. Pupils dilated and filled with lust. 

“Kiss me, please…” you beg for him with your arms wide open. 

Gulping loudly Mr. Suh lowers himself to you. His chest sliding up yours making you squirm beneath him. His lips skate over yours, a whisper of a kiss to the corner of your mouth. Whimper after whimper comes from you. Never before have you been this desperate to feel someone’s lips on yours. To feel their body on top of you — pressing you into a couch until you can’t escape. 

“You’re so beauti —”

“Daddy!!” Lily calls out for him. “Daddy!!”

In a matter of seconds Mr. Suh is off of you. Back pressed against the arm of the couch from the opposite end. Hair mused. Chest rising and falling rapidly and a rather noticeable…you look away from his lap. 

“Y-You need to leave!” He scrambles to his feet.

“Daddy!” Lily cries out. 

“Coming!” He says frantically.

“Mr. Suh, I…”

“Just leave!” He shouts before leaving his study in a hurry. “Lily! Sweetheart, what’s wrong?!”

“He saw a text I sent to Jen about him being hot. Didn’t take much to know I was into him,” you tell Doyoung leaving out the sorted details. 

“What are you going to do?”

“I would run away and avoid him but I kind of need his help in order to pass.” Turning to your friend with a somber face you try your best to smile but a single tear slides down your cheek. “So I’m going to pass and put him behind me after this semester.”

Reaching over, Doyoung places his hand in yours. “I’m sorry, kid.” 

“Me too.” You wipe your eye. 

Within five minutes you were in front of Mr. Suh’s house. Doyoung whistling the moment he sees the place. Asking if you wanted him to walk you to the door for extra support you declined the offer. Telling him to be here at 6PM or at least to have his cell on hand if you should need to call him for an earlier pick up, he reassures you that he’ll be close by. 

As you make your way up to the house Doyoung calls your name. Turning to look back you’re engulfed in his arms. “I know this is going to be hard but please stay strong, okay?” He asks you.

Nodding and giving into the sweetest, softest hug known to mankind you melt into him. “I will.”

“If you need ANYTHING, call me or text me. I’ll be over here ASAP. Got it?”

“Mmm…” you nod. 

“See you soon.”

“See you soon, and thank you!” You shout, waving your hand. 

Waving back, Doyoung gets into his car and drives off down the road. Turning back to the house you find Mr. Suh at the door. Eyes dark and unreadable. Walking up to him his aura is different. Then again, the hot makeout session the other day could be the reason. 

“You’re late.” He says as you pass by him.

“I needed a ride. Sorry.” You head straight for the kitchen. “Oh. Before I forget.” You pull out a small bag with some chicken noodle soup in it and orange juice. “For Lily.”

“She’s fine.” He brushes past you without taking the bag. 

“I see.” Leaving the bag on the counter near the kitchen sink you take your seat. “I’ve already done the homework.” You take out your binder. 

“Hand it to me.”

Doing as instructed you wait for Mr. Suh to check your work. His hand scribbles down where you’ve made mistakes. Of course there were mistakes. You haven’t been able to get the kiss you had with him out of your mind. Even in your sleep you feel his lips and hands on you. Taking out your textbook you open up to the chapter Mr. Jeong went over yesterday to distract yourself.

“What is this mess?” Mr. Suh breaks you out of your thoughts. “This!” He shoves your homework up to your face where all you see are red markings. “This is unacceptable!”

“Sorry.” You look down. 

“What happened? You should have been able to get past this with flying colors?” Shrugging you avoid looking at him. “Answer me!”

“I don’t know what happened!”

“Did you double check your work? Did you read the questions carefully?!”

“I thought I did.”

“Well thinking wasn’t on your side now was it?!” He snarls.

“Look!” You shout. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to get them all wrong! I’m sorry I’m too stupid to understand this! Why do I need to learn this anyway?! I want to teach Kindergarten! I want to have fun and watch them learn their alphabet and numbers. Why do I need to learn all this other stuff?!” Tears start pouring down your face. 

“Because you don’t know what grade you will be assigned to! That’s why! So enough with the tears and pay attention!”

“Why are you being so mean?” You sniff. 

He goes quiet, his body rigged. Ever since you walked up to him he’s been a real asshole for no reason at all. Yes, you got questions wrong — knowing it’s only because the kiss that you can’t get out of your mind being the main culprit behind the insurmountable amount of red ink on your homework. But this, this behavior because you got answers wrong is not that the Johnny… Mr. Suh, that you know. 

Turning his head from you he lets out a huge exhale. “Because being nice to you ended up with us…” he stops himself before proceeding with the real reason he’s in a shitty mood.

“So that constitutes you being mean to me instead?!” Taking out your phone which you had on mute you start to type out an S.O.S to Doyoung.

“No phones!” He grabs your phone. “I told you this already. Are you having a hard time following simple rules?!”

“I was telling my friend to pick me up! Give me my phone!”

“What?! I cleared my schedule to help you and you’re going to leave? You’re here to learn so that’s what you’re going to do. Now sit down and listen to me young lady!”

“No! You’re not my father and you’re not my teacher!” You challenge by packing up your belongings.

“I said sit down!” He stands up his body looming over you threateningly. 

“No!” You tremble in rage. “Give me my phone…back!!”

“So you can contact that boyfriend of yours?”

Your arms fly from your sides exasperated. “Boyfriend?!” 

“Yes. The boy glaring daggers at me!”

“Glare? What glare?! Are you talking about Doyoung?! He’s my best friend. I’ve known him my whole life! W-Wait…are you…jealous?!”

Quickly Mr. Suh’s demeanor changes from hostile tutor to blubbering idiot. “J-Jealous?! Wh-What?! That’s absurd!”

“If you’re not jealous you’ll give me back my phone,” you hold out your hand.

“I’m not jealous and you’re not getting your phone back. You’re here to learn!”

“Give me my phone!”

“No! Now sit down.” Ignoring his order you zip up your now full again backpack and hurl it over your shoulders. “Wh-What are you doing?!”

“Leaving.”

“You can’t leave!”

“I’m my own person. I’m free to go wherever I please.”

“If you leave I won’t tutor you anymore!” He threatens.

“Fine with me.” You continue to pack your things.

“Y-You’ll fail!”

“Guess I will.”

“You can’t be serious.” You ignore him as you head out of the kitchen. “Y-Yah!!” He chases after you. “Are you stupid?!”

“Already told you I was the first day we met.”

“Stop this!” He grabs your wrist. Halting in front of him you don’t bother turning around. “Fine. Take it.” He growls, placing your phone in your hand. “There. Now will you stay?”

“No.” You click send and head to the front door.

“What?! I gave you back your phone!”

“So?” You smirk. “You think that means that I’ll stay here? I’m not going to deal with someone who has an attitude problem. It doesn’t help me at all.”

“I don’t have an attitude problem.”

“Uh, yeah, you do.”

“I don’t!”

“From the moment I walked inside you’ve been cross with me. Why? Is it because we kissed the other day? Is it because Lily is sick and you’re tired? Or is it because you saw me hugging someone else?” Mr. Suh looks away from you the moment you mention the hug. Shocked, you cross your arms over your chest. “No way,” you chuckle. “Don’t tell me that Mr. Suh has a wittle crush,” you say in a baby voice. “Wouldn’t that be something? Especially after all that bullshit about it being bad for me to like you.”

“Stop.” His fists clench at his sides, his body trembling as he glares at you.

“What? Is it because I’m right? Did you fall for me when I kissed you?” You press.

“I said stop!”

“Come now, do share with the class how you’re feeling,” you spread your arms open as if you’re talking to more than just Mr. Suh. Seething with rage, you peer up at him through your lashes. “Come now, Johnny.” 

A sharp pain strikes down your spine as your back makes contact with the wall closest to the door — a tiny alcove just barely big enough for you to nestle into you, no escape in sight. You gasp for air as strong hands grip both your waist and your neck, making sure that you don’t get away. Lips crash down onto yours with such force you’re sure the metallic taste in your mouth is your own blood. Teeth crash into teeth, the grip on your waist tightens — eyes getting blurry with tears as your air supply starts to run low. 

Pulling back for a seconds, Mr. Suh takes in a breath allowing you to breathe as well, only for his lips to crash down onto yours again. This kiss was anything but gentle. It’s rough and raw like he’s trying to devour your soul one kiss at a time. Stomach swirling like a tornado when he growls against your lips, a beast waiting to devour it’s prey — your knees almost give out from the hottest guttural groan you’ve ever heard a man make in your life, your thighs clenching together.  

“You’re such a brat,” he grips your waist tighter leaving out a shaky breath. 

Mr. Suh’s grip on your neck loosens as his body presses against yours, the feeling of his arousal already present. Gasping, your arms wrap around his neck drawing him closer to you. His tongue skates across your lips, begging for entrance. Parting your lips, his tongue swirls around yours fighting for dominance, which you gladly complied — mind already turning to mush at the slightest touch and kiss he presses against you.

Pulling back he leaves you with a single peck on your lips as both of your chests rapidly heave — your breath mixing with his, unknown feelings blending in with each other’s.

“I-I think you need to be taught some manners.” He says breathlessly. 

“I-I’m sorry…” you plead while your mind races for what might come if he does in fact punish you.

He snickers, his eyes cloudy and hooded, a lusftul sinister look plastered on his face. “Liar.” He squeezes your neck tighter, his eyes starting to close.

“Pl-Please…c-can’t…breathe…”

Laughing he grips your neck even harder — still not tight enough to do any real damage, but your breath still feels staggered each breath you take in. “Good!” He hisses and trails his lips over your cheek before he kisses the corner of your mouth. “You dare to argue with me in my own home then proceed to tease me!” His grip on your waist tightens while he pulls you into him, your bodies flush against each other’s. “You insolent brat!” 

Kissing you again the little air you were able to breathe is taken from you. Your body growing limp in his hold. Your mind lost to the lust that’s blazing through you like a rocket. It’s embers striking every nerve in your body — the slightest touch of his lips to yours makes you whimper, the grip of his hand on your waist growing tighter till it feels as if he’ll leave impressions has you shivering. Your lips move along with his desperately, waiting to be consumed by him to have your whole existence wrecked by a single glance from him. Whatever he wants to do to you, you’ll gladly comply. A slave to his touch you become engulfed by him. 

Like a switch going off, Mr. Suh rips you from the wall by your neck and you’re free from him. “I will never be jealous,” he rolls his neck, eyes growing dark with hunger each step he takes towards you. “That little twerp can have you only when I’m done with you.”

The powerful wolf and the meek rabbit you back away from, your hands raised in both defense and to placate him. “I-I don’t want him…”

Smirking, he continues to stalk towards you your body getting closer and closer to the couch. “Why is that?”

Your heels smack against the bottom of the couch. Trapped again you can’t go anywhere else without him catching you easily. Your body trembles, your skin covered in goosebumps. “I want you!” You say desperately reaching out to him. “Only you.”

Pushing you down onto the couch, Johnny wastes no time at all. Towering over you, his eyes so dark and full of feral lust mirroring your own, his gaze washes over you inch by inch. Stopping at your breasts, you involuntarily take a deep breath in — causing your chest to rise and Johnny’s bottom lip to be sucked between his teeth. His eyes travel lower to your stomach and then pauses for what seems like an eternity — your pelvis, his gaze lingers as sinful thoughts reel through your mind. 

What it would be like to have his tongue skate over your wet folds. What it would be like to have his fingers ramming inside of you, and the second most sinful thought of all — his dick pummeling into you without a second thought to your wellbeing. 

Possessed by desire, your legs start to spread apart, a subconscious invitation for him to come closer. To merge his body with your own. On cue, he moves forward just as your legs spread far enough for him to fit between them. One of his hands props his body up while the other touches your cheek gingerly. Your eyes start to close as you give into the soft caress. When his thumb passes over your lips you give it a small kiss. 

“Why did you have to do this to me?” 

“Why did you have to do this to me, Mr. Suh?” You throw the question back at him. It wasn’t just him that is under a spell, but yourself as well. 

Ever since you first saw him you wanted to know him, to be a part of his life. Cupid’s arrow didn’t just get you — it flew straight into your mind and scrambled your brain. The moment you saw him playing outside with his daughter, the smile on his face; the carefree aura that surrounded him sent you soaring. Entranced the moment your eyes fell on him you’ve wondered how haven’t jumped him yet.

Leaning into his touch you turn your head kissing the palm of his hand, a faint sent of lotion and soap fill your head; with a splash of your perfume. Your lips travel to his wrist and down his arm, your eyes staring him down wanting nothing more than to feel his lips over your body.

“Fuck,” he whispers. 

“Please don’t punish me, Mr. Suh…” You lick and nip at his wrist.

“Shit…” he rasps. “You’re so beautiful,” he rubs his thumb against your cheek before grabbing your chin. “But you’re a brat, and brats need to be dealt with.” 

Gulping from anticipation you feign innocence. “I-I didn’t mean it! Please!” Your mouth says forgive me but your eyes say come and get it. 

Smirking, Johnny’s hand travels from your chin down to your neck and across your décolletage slowly — making sure every touch has you inching closer and closer to him. “Are you sure about that?”

“Yes~” you purr reaching up to him, pulling him down to you.

Johnny’s eyes grow darker. His grip around your neck loosening. “What do you think you’re doing?” He lowers himself onto you more until his chest is pressed against yours. “I don’t believe I gave you permission to do that.” Sighing he shakes his head. “What am I going to do with you?”

“Anything!” You choke out. 

His lips meet yours in a gentle yet chilling kiss, “be careful what you wish for.” He says in a dark husky voice. 

“You can do whatever you want to me…” you state firmly. “Anything.”

Stopping the smile that played on his lips, his hand travels down from your décolletage to just above the neckline of your low cut shirt. “Are you sure about that?”

Nodding eagerly, you stare up at him. With a swift movement Johnny has you switching positions with him; instead of standing between his legs — he pulls you on top of his lap, your legs straddling him. His hands rest just above your ass — your body sinking until you feel the bulge that is seconds from bursting through his loose fitted jeans. Wanting nothing than to grind your hips against him you withhold the urge. 

After so many nights of fantasizing about him you’re finally at the moment where your dreams can become reality. There’s no way you’re going to screw it up and push him past his comfort zone. Especially, with a burning question in the back of your mind. With the roll of his hips your body gives into the lust you’ve kept locked away. Throwing away your inhibitions you grab his cheeks into your hand and smash your lips down onto his. 

Your hips grinding into each other’s, both of you gasp for air between kisses — his grip on you tightening, holding you down against him getting out his frustration just as much as you’re chasing to release the frustration within you. Biting his bottom lip you’re desperate to taste him again. To feel his tongue swirling around yours in a forbidden dance of passion. 

Parting his lips your tongue slides into his mouth only to capture his tongue between your lips. Shifting your body higher up on his, you suck on his tongue as if it were his dick. Mr. Suh groaning, his arms going from the top of your behind to around your waist. Releasing his tongue you go back to kissing him, missing the feeling of his lips on yours. 

His mouth moves from yours and down to your chin. Angling your head back you give him access to your neck. Nipping, sucking and biting, Mr. Suh marks you, claiming ownership of your body. Moving down to the base of your neck, you melt in his hold a shiver washing over you. Smiling against your neck his lips spread and suck on a sensitive spot. Soft whimpers escape your lips — wanting to both flee from him as well as grab onto his hair to keep yourself in place to savor the delightful feeling.

Moving back from your neck Mr. Suh glances at the art piece he’s created on your body. His hold on you loosens allowing you to find purchase again on his lap both of you hissing when your clothed core brushes against his bulge. 

Wincing as your hips roll over his again, keeping his hands at your waist to steady your ministrations he confesses. “J-Just so you know, I-I’ve never done this before.” 

“Never done what before?” You ask slowing down before you work yourself up even more. 

His eyes quiver from fear, apprehension, you can’t tell. Touching his cheek you smile and give him a gentle nod of encouragement. 

“I don’t normally want to fuck my students. In fact, I’ve never wanted to do that before until —’’

“Until?” You give a faint smile.

Rolling his hips you whimper bringing your hand up to your lips shocked by the sound that passed your lips. “What do you think?” He asks.

“I never thought of you as someone who sleeps with his students. Especially, not with Lily around —” gasping you look behind you to the staircase. “I-Is she here? Shit, I didn’t think about it until now…” scrambling to get off of his lap Mr. Suh keeps you in place.

“I wouldn’t have started anything with you if Lily were in the house. She’s with Jaehyun right now. His neighbor’s kids are her classmates. She visits him every now and then to spend more time with them. It’s okay we’re alone,” he chuckles.

“Thank heavens,” you sink into his hold. “Wait a second! I thought she was sick. Is she well enough to be around others?” You perk up again.

Avoiding your gaze Johnny clears his throat. “Uh, about that…I, uh, lied. Well, I mean she wasn’t feeling well. She ate too much chocolate and had a stomach ache, but she’s fine now.”

Freezing on top of him your eyes widen. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have bought so much.”

Wrapping a gentle hand around your neck he pulls you down to him. “She ate my chocolate apparently. Snuck down at night,” he smiles against your lips. “The little sneak.”

Smiling along with him you enjoy the warm cozy feeling of his slipping from your neck down to your back, where his his thumb rubs against you with a soothing touch. “She’s adorable. You’ve done a great job raising her.”

“Thank you,” Johnny kisses you gently. “I’m surprised you haven’t asked me about her mother,” he pulls away from you hands resting on your hips once again. 

Shit…

“Oh, I, now that you mention it, I haven’t met her.” You laugh nervously.

Not believing your realization one bit he squints at you. “Exactly what has Jaehyun told you?”

Ears perking up you turn away from him. “Mr. Jeong? What do you mean?”

“Now I could be a poor judge of character, but you don’t seem like the type of girl who would ruin a marriage just because she has the hots for the husband. So, I’m guessing you either know or have an inkling as to why you haven’t met Lily’s mother. So, what is it?”

“Ummm, I mean, I…”

A dark aura swirls around Mr. Suh while a devilish grin dances across his face. “Hmm, maybe a little coaxing will do the trick,” he moves one of his hands from your hips to between your legs — lifting away from him startled, he uses the opportunity to cup your throbbing core. “So, what do you know?” He adds pressure while rubbing his hand over you, stirring the neediness to have him buried deep inside of you.

“M-Mr. S-Suh!!”

“Come on, tell me, what do you know?” He presses harder against your pulsating core, your body pushing down against his hand wanting more. 

Shaking your head you try to prolong his taunting. “N-Nothing! W-We barely talk about you,” a half truth and half lie. 

Slowing down Johnny goes to remove his hand but you grab his wrist. “Oh, do you suddenly remember?” 

“Don’t stop,” you whimper. “Please!” You bring his hand back to your now soaking core not caring if your jeans are getting ruined and grind against his hand.

Gulping, Johnny watches you for a second mesmerized by your performance. How you’re so worked up and he hasn’t even taken off your clothes. Snapping out of his thoughts he yanks his hand away. “Tell me what you know and I’ll continue.” 

Crying out you go to grab his hand again but he puts it behind his back. “MR. SUH!!!!” 

“Tell me what I need to know and if you’re good I’ll give you what you want and then some.” 

“Why do you want to know so badly? Really, Mr. Jeong normally just asks if you’re nice to me and if I’m actually learning anything. Apparently my grades aren’t proof enough.” Your body goes slack against him.

Kissing the top of your head that’s now resting on his chest, he slides his hands under the hem of your shirt and up your back. The warmth of his fingers making you shiver. “Just tell me, that’s all you have to do.” He whispers.

Groaning you shake your head. “If I die its your fault. He told me to keep this knowledge a secret you know.”

“He won’t hurt you. Now out with it. I’d like to have some adult time before Lily gets home.”

Sitting up straight almost hitting Johnny’s chin you clear your throat. “Mr. Jeong told me not to mention your wife at all in front of you or Lily. He didn’t give me a lot of details but just said that she left and mentioning her would make you upset. So that’s why I never once asked about her. 

“I actually wanted to give her a present of appreciation for allowing me to borrow you, this whole time. I assumed she would have preferred spending the end of the day with Lily and yourself, but Mr. Jeong said she wouldn’t get it. I thought it meant she was sick or dead. He corrected me.”

“So, you know everything?” His gaze falls from yours.

“In a roundabout way, yes.”

“So, I must ask, are you sure these feelings of yours, aren’t out of pity? The poor tutor whose wife ditched him in the middle of the night.”

“Stop that!” You shout startling him. “I don’t know if you’ve forgotten, but I already thought you were irresistible from the moment I saw you. That awkward text message to my friend is evidence enough.” He chuckles, shaking his head still avoiding your gaze. Grabbing his chin you turn and raise his head so he’s looking into your eyes. 

“Nothing has changed. I do not like you out of pity. I like you because you’re resilient. You raised Lily into a sweet girl, really, she’s adorable. You juggled being a full-time dad with a full-time job. You’re still able to keep a bachelor like Mr. Jeong around despite it all so you’re either super mega ultra best friends, or you’re loaded and he’s using you for your money.” He cracks a huge smile and you continue. “And,” your hand drops from his chin but a single finger slides down his neck, Johnny gulping in the process. “You obviously take care of your physical health too…” your finger finds it’s way to the middle of his broad muscular chest.

”That’s a lot coming from someone who doesn't know me at all.” He attempts to brush off your compliments, but the tinge of pink coming to his cheeks betrays him. 

“And you don’t know anything about me aside from the fact that you’re now my tutor and math is definitely not my best subject. Yet here we are,” you roll your pelvis against his. “Two strangers trying to find something that they need.”

”What exactly do I need?” He grunts when a particular roll of your hips makes him buck upwards.

Smirking, you slither down to the floor, crawling between Johnny’s legs. Locking eyes with him, you run your hands up his thighs and over the tent of his jeans. 

“A release,” you giggle moving your face closer to where his dick is covered by his jeans. 

Pressing harder against him you palm him over the taught fabric. “I-Is that so?!!” He says breathlessly trying to keep his cool.

“Mhmm, oh and maybe a tight pussy to shove your big dick into.” You unzip his jeans. “Plus, it’s been far too long since I’ve gotten a proper release myself.”

Gulping, he watches you like a hawk, his chest rising and falling. “Wh-When was the last time exactly?”

Pausing, you think back to your last boyfriend. A boy indeed since you both were only sixteen at the time. He was nice and cute, the typical boy next door that every mother wants for her daughter. Hell, he even went to church on Sunday’s. The problem with him… behind those baby blue eyes and sweet smile, he was a complete sadist! 

Bending you over the bed frame while he plowed into you from behind, not warming you up, not caring about the fact it was your first time and you could feel blood trickling down your leg. It hurt a lot that first time. The couple times afterwards we’re just as bad. He called foreplay smacking your pussy with his dick, rather hard too. And a female orgasm, forget about it. He stated with his full chest ‘the female orgasm doesn’t exist. I’ve read numerous academic articles online.’ In truth he read a bunch of misogynistic, I’m-an alpha-male-who-can’t-make-a-woman-cum articles that convinced him otherwise. 

After the third terrible, painful sexual experience you had to grow a backbone and call it quits — resulting in a rumor that you loved eating ass, because that made sense. The only ass you would have eaten was his so it all backfired on him anyway. A snippet of karma for his pettiness. 

The only other experience was with your neighbor's daughter. An out of the blue moment, you were both watching porn and just wanted to know how it would feel. That was your senior year and boy was it… fun. A tiny secret you’ll keep till you find a man who is self-assured enough to handle it. Perhaps… Mr. Suh could be…

“It’s been quite a while. And I really,” you move back to tug down his jeans, Mr. Suh helping you by raising his butt off the couch. “Really need to get rid of this pent up frustration you’ve caused. And since it’s your fault,” you toss his jeans over your head. “I think it’s only fair that you help me out. Don’t you think?” 

Leaning forward you press your lips on Johnny’s incredible length. Already impressed you run your lips across his briefs licking a wet streak as you go.

“Jesus Christ,” he groans throwing his head back. “God that feels good already.”

Giggling you find the tip of his cock, his briefs showing a stain of precum on the outside. Smushing your thighs together you attempt to calm the beating of your pulsing bundle of nerves — wanting so badly to touch yourself, to come undone while sucking him off, but Mr. Suh needs this moment and you can wait. 

Suckling on the cum that’s leaked from him already you savor the taste of him. How many times you’ve dreamt about what he would taste like and smell like. How big he’d be — your imagination not doing him justice at all, and how it would feel for him to go balls deep inside of you. 

“I need your lips on me…” he groans, with one hand gripping the arm of the couch for dear life and the other tangled up in his hair. 

Kitten licking the impression of his cock you grab the waistband of his briefs and yank them down as well, till he steps out of them with your help. Tossing them behind you like you did his jeans you darn near pass out. Nothing you could have ever imagined would compare to what is in front of you. With your mouth hanging open, Johnny sits up taking off his shirt and throwing it with his other clothes. 

Sitting back he takes his more than you would have thought, length into his hand stroking it. Amazed at the scene in front of you, you stay put almost desperate to watch him jerk himself off before even motioning for you to come over and make him cum again. Now that would be punishment.

“Do you think you candle this?” He taunts you by wiggling his cock in front of you. 

Not only was he long but the amount of girth he possessed made it hard for his cock to stand up on its own. It’s just too damn heavy. 

“I-I’m more than willing to try!” You scramble between his legs desperate to taste him again.

Before you can take a hold of him, he yanks his cock back. “How badly do you want to suck my dick?”

“I’m soaking wet just thinking about it, Mr. Suh.”

Turning his head away from you stunned by your honesty he composes himself once more. “Come closer,” he calls to you.

Nestling as close as you can between his legs, your arms rest on the tops of his thighs. Earnestly waiting for him to let you take control. 

“Open your mouth,” he instructs.

Opening wide, you follow his instructions. Mr. Suh, pumps his hand up and down his length a few more times until he places just the tip of his cock into your mouth. 

“Ouhm,” you make a non-coherent sound and try to hold onto his length, the weight of his cock already a lot by just the tip resting in your mouth. 

Quickly, before you can take hold, Mr. Suh pulls his cock away chuckling. “I don’t know if you can handle it.”

Clicking your tongue you get up onto your knees. “Watch me!” 

Staring down at the massive length of Johnny’s cock, you gulp as lightly as you can muster. This is going to be a hell of a task. Of course, you expected him to be packing but this! It’s as everyone says, God does have favorites and he’s bestowed Johnny onto you. 

Thank you.

Looking up at Johnny you stare him down as you stick out your tongue. Getting closer and closer to the tip of his cock, his bottom lip gets snagged between his teeth. Anticipation causes his chest to rise and fall — ears, cheeks, and chest turning the lightest shade of pink. Nodding he urges you to move closer and when you finally make contact with the tip, his eyes roll to the back of his head.

”Fuck~~~” he drawls out a growl. 

It wasn’t just his eyes that rolled into the back of his head, but yours too. As you kitten lick down the length of his cock, you can’t help but moan onto his shaft. The taste and smell of him, intoxicating. You lick a stripe down to the base only to pull away and blow gently on the wetness you created.

“Sh-Shit…” Mr. Suh chuckles. “That’s something new,” he strokes the top of your head. 

“Learned it from an ex,” you admit. 

“Tell them I said thanks.” Smirking, you kiss up and down his length before finally taking him into your mouth. “Oh, yes baby…”

Hollowing out your cheeks you suck on the head of his cock. Like a woman possessed you dive deeper and deeper around him. The tip reaching the back of your throat gagging you.

”Easy, baby…” Mr. Suh coos, stroking your hair. “Take your time.”

Sliding up his length your mouth hangs open, saliva stringing from his shaft to your lips. Eyes clouded with lust you merely nod before spitting on his dick and diving back down. 

He is right. There is far too much of him to gobble down immediately. His girth stretching out the corners of your lips making it feel as though they’ll split and bleed. But, you just can’t help yourself. He’s far too enticing to resist. 

Sitting up straighter, you take the lower base of Mr. Suh’s shaft and dive down until you reach your hand. A long groan comes from him. Taking a shot in the dark from your bestie’s rendezvous’ you try the one thing she said made her ex-boyfriend go crazy. 

As Mr. Suh reaches the back of your throat you hold him there in your mouth, your mouth sucking the life out of him before slowly pulling back. Your tongue juts out and you lick the back of his length along the pronounced vein — Mr. Suh’s body trembling underneath your touch.

”Fuck ~~~~ that felt good.” His hand strokes down your hair one last time before he grabs a handful. “But I need more of that pretty mouth of yours.”

Lowering your head back down onto his cock, Mr. Suh uses your mouth to get himself off. His hips thrusting up, his dick slides in and out of your mouth quickly. Your eyes tearing up — the tip of his length no doubt creating an impression in the back of your throat — pushing you down further, your body moves forward and curls as you try not to gag. Doing everything you’ve heard to stop yourself from retching, you keep your body still until he pulls out.

Choking on air, you wipe your mouth of the thick saliva that escaped past your lips. Looking up at Johnny starry and blurry eyed you watch him stroke himself earnestly waiting for you to wrap your lips around him again. Pushing his hand away, you do what that useless ex actually complimented you for — and give Mr. Suh the best blow job of his life.

Soaking his cock in your saliva, you lick all the way down his shaft, pumping your hand at the top before sucking one of his balls into your mouth. Mr. Suh’s hand finding purchase in your hair before he pulls you back, causing you to release his sack with a pop and barely giving you a chance to give the other a little lick before you’re staring at him again.

With a smirk plastered to your face you ask, “what? You don’t like that?” 

”Quite the contrary, but I’d rather cum with your mouth wrapped around my dick and not my balls.” 

Listening to his request you wrap your lips around the tip once more and suckle on it and his length like he was your favorite flavor of lollipop. Small kisses decorate the underside of his shaft before you kiss the head. Staring him down you slide your hand up and down his length.

Mr. Suh’s eyes start closing the closer you edge him to cum. His body trembling and his groans getting louder until you blow down the slickness you’ve created and he shivers beneath you. Giggling you hollow your cheeks around him and drink him up when his hands hold your head down on him.

”Fuck! Just a little…” he growls lifting his hip, his cock sliding in out of your mouth. “SHIT!!” He pushes your head down more until you choke on his dick, this time your hands grip the top of his thighs, your nails creating impressions in his skin. “I’m gonna~~~” he groans, his head dropping back to his shoulders.

Warm liquid fills your mouth. Small whimpers rumble in your throat as his cum coats your mouth. He doesn’t move away, his pelvis frozen in the air while he spasms beneath you. Your mouth fills and some of his essence slips past your lips and drips down his length. With one final jerk of his body, Mr. Suh lowers himself down back to the couch, his cock sliding from your lips slowly.

His chest heaves quickly, eyes clouded just like you know yours are. With a quick swipe of your thumb over your lips, you tilt your head back, his cum slipping down your throat until its gone. 

“Shit…” he lets out a long shaky breath. “That was amazing,” he chuckles. “But I do think I need to repay the favor.”

”Oh, believe me Mr. Suh, it was my pleasure,” you say, licking all of the residue of his release from your fingers. 

Wiggling a finger, he beckons you to him. “Come here, you little brat,” he calls to you. 

Getting onto your feet you stand between Mr. Suh’s legs. He sits up, eyeing your body before him. “Well this won’t do,” he slides his hand under your shirt. “We need to get rid of these.” 

Quickly, you strip from your shirt, the fabric flying off the top of your head and landing somewhere on the floor. Laughing, Mr. Suh, undoes the buttons of your jeans, sliding them down your body. Just like your shirt you discard the piece of clothing somewhere away from you on the floor. Standing in your bra and panties, Mr. Suh takes the opportunity to let his eyes roam over every curve and inch of you. 

Thanking the Lord you decided to wear your matching black bra and panties today instead of your usual ‘whatever you can find’ combo — he wraps his arms around the back of your legs and pulls you till you're straddling his lap once more, your soaked panties brushing against his hardened length.

Shocked that Mr. Suh could still be this hard after coming once, you wrap your arms around his neck. “You’re quite insatiable, Mr. Suh.” You tease and grind on top of his length earning a low growl from deep in his throat.

“How could I not be with a beautiful woman in my presence?” He asks and unsnaps your bra, the straps sliding down your arms before you sit up allowing him to pull the fabric off of you. Discarding it in the heap of clothing now collecting on the floor he takes in your bare breasts. 

With hungry eyes and a lick of his lips he cups one of your breasts in his hand. An airy moan has you throwing your head back, your hands resting on his shoulder. 

“So sensitive,” he says playfully. 

“They’ve always been sensitive…” you confess. 

“Is that so?” 

Leaning forward, he gives your unattended breast a kiss near your nipple. Another moan emitting from you. Taking both of your breasts in his hands, you arch your back, resting your hand instead of on his shoulder but the top of his thighs. Glancing up at you he captures one of your nipples in his mouth, swirling his tongue around your sensitive bud. While he pinches and twists the other nipple. 

Your hips start grinding on top of his lap, the feeling of his mouth on your breast a little too good to withstand. Growling his teeth graze over your perky bud making you jump a little. Chuckling he switches to the other side and repeats the same sensuous torture, your body craving for his mouth and hands on another part of you. Kissing along the top of your chest, his arms wrap around your waist pulling you back to him — his back resting on the back of the couch, while he devours your chest up to your neck one kiss, lick and nip at a time. 

“Your choice,” he whispers against your neck. “Mouth or fingers?”

“E-Eh?”

Staring up at you with those chocolate orbs of his, he reaches for the back of your neck and pulls you down gently till his lips rest on yours. “Do you want me to get you off with my mouth or my fingers?” He places a feather-like kiss on your lips. 

Gulping, you whisper against each kiss he leaves, “f-fingers…please!”

Knowing that there is no way in hell that you would last even a minute if his tongue grazed over your clit — at least with his fingers you’ll be able to feel him inside of you — the probability of lasting longer much higher than if he used his mouth. The throbbing between your legs making you three times more sensitive than normal, a loud moan interrupts your throats as Mr. Suh rubs over your wet folds — having already moved your panties to the side, he prods your entrance before rubbing over your clit once more. 

Mumbling against your neck, he pulls his hand back from you. “Fuck baby, you’re already so wet.” Pulling his hand up he shows you your slick on his fingers. “Damn…” he twiddles his fingers in amazement at how you’ve soaked them. “So wet for me,” he slides his fingers into his mouth.

“M-Mr. Suh!!!!” You squeak, grabbing his hand to stop him but his fingers disappear into his mouth. 

Groaning, his eyes roll back as he sucks his fingers clean of your juices. “So fucking good…I knew you’d taste good,” he drops his hand back down to between your legs, his fingers sliding across your folds; spreading your slick over your clit. Probing your entrance with his middle finger, he rubs your bundle of nerves with his thumb. 

“M-Mr. Suh…” you whimper. 

Sliding his finger inside of you, he bites down on your neck. “Shit, baby,” he pumps his finger in and out of you. Squelching noises from your pussy sound out alongside your soft moans. “You’re dripping wet...”

“I’ve wanted you from the moment I saw you,” you place your hands on the side of his face, tilting his head up for you to kiss him. The taste of his mouth as well as your slick swirling around, arousing you more and more as the kiss prolongs. Your hips start swiveling before you drop down onto his finger — sinking him inside of you. “Mmm…more…” you raise your hips to slide back down on his fingers.

“You sure?” He bites your bottom lip.

”Pleas, Mr. Suh…” you whine.

Chuckling, he waits until you’ve raise your hips once more before sliding his finger out, a strand of your wetness pulling away. Rubbing over your clit gently with his fingers, he soothes you into a comfortable rhythm, your hips following his movements against his cock. When his fingers are nice and wet, he whispers ‘up,’ and you separate from his length. 

One-by-one, Mr. Suh slides in all of his fingers but his thumb into your entrance. Each time allowing you to adjust to his fingers and the spread of your inner walls. It’s been far too long since you’ve felt this good and without thinking, your pelvis starts to grind down onto his fingers. 

“That’s it baby,” he kisses your chin. “Fuck yourself with my fingers.”

With this simple command you sink yourself deeper down onto Mr. Suh’s fingers. Your body arching back, his fingers pressed together creating the perfect arch to rub over that sensitive spot inside of you. Forgetting to be coy, you become a moaning whimpering whore on top of him. The only thing running through your mind is trying to find that sweet release you’ve been dying to feel from the moment he kissed you. 

The way he grabbed you and choked you. The sensuous venom in his voice as he called you a brat. How he couldn’t help but rock his hips into yours while you sucked the life out of his tongue before you showed his cock — mere inches below you, the same treatment. Nothing else matters in the world right now than finding your release, but more importantly that Mr. Suh is the one helping you.

“SHIT!” You screech when a specific rock of your hip has you slowly coming undone on top of him. 

“Right there, baby?” He sits up, moving his body back to get a better angle.

“Yes! Yes!” You cry out.

Like a flash of light, Mr. Suh grips onto your hip while he quickly moves his fingers in and out of you — building up the pressure from deep inside of you. Your body starts to raise higher and higher as he continues to pound his fingers into you. Words are lost on your tongue while cries of pleasure and a bit of pain pour from you. The charging roar of your climax sending chills over your body, your sight becoming dark and blurry until you scream.

“FUCK!!!!” 

Liquid pours from you as Mr. Suh removes his hand, drenching his lap and the inside of your legs. He holds onto you tightly while your body jerks and spasms from the most intense orgasm you’ve ever felt. 

“Keep going, baby,” he growls his hand rubbing over your clit gearing up another wave of juices to pour from you. “That’s it! That’s a good girl!” He chuckles, amazed at how riled up you got. “But I’m sorry, I need more from you.” Small spasms take over you as your placed with your back down on the couch and your legs wrapped around Mr. Suh’s hips. 

More? How can you possibly give any more than what you’ve already done? You know through the starry blackness covering your eyes, that you’ve soaked Mr. Suh’s lap and his couch in the process and yet he wants more? You didn’t even know you could squirt! And he wants to make you squirt more?!

Unwrapping your legs from his waist, he grabs a pillow from the couch placing it behind your head making sure you’re comfortable. Lifting up your legs he slides your drenched panties up and off of you, squeezing them to see how much of your squirt spills from them and onto the floor. 

“You have no idea how bad I want to fuck you right now,” he growls as the last drop of your essence hits the floor. 

“Then do it~~” you whine, still breathless from your release. 

“Patience, sweetie,” he chuckles, nestling between your legs. “I’m going to savor you for as long as I can.” 

Kissing the inside of your thighs, your body reacts instantaneously. Your legs clamping down around his face making him laugh as he’s squished between your thighs. Prying your legs open he gives your pussy mound a light kiss before his tongue finally lands on your bundle of nerves. 

“SH-SHIT!!!!” Your legs go to clamp around his face but he quickly holds out his hands to block them. “I-I can’t…I can’t…” you cry, your hands gripping the pillow behind you.

Popping his head up you can see your juices smeared across his lips and chin. “Yes you can,” he licks his lips staring you dead straight in the eyes. An involuntary moan has you bitting your bottom lip to keep you from making any more sounds. “You taste delicious,” he dives down for another lick. “Best pussy ever.” He mumbles against your folds.

Spreading your folds with his tongue, Mr. Suh clamps down around your clit, sucking it hard until you’re seeing stars once more. Raising your one leg up closer by your ears you give him more access. His hands move from your inner thighs to your hips while he devours you. Slurping sounds fill the room while he drinks you. 

Mr. Suh works quickly as he gears you up for your next orgasm. Hips moving against his mouth you try to urge your body as well to reach that place of euphoria once more. Hands moving from the pillow behind you to your breasts you massage the taut flesh giving in to the feeling of Mr. Suh’s tongue swirling around your clit and down to your entrance. 

Wanting nothing more than to spend the rest of the evening like this on the couch, your body starts to rile up again. The tiny hairs on your body standing on end, a fire building up from the top of your head making its way to your stomach with ever roll of your hips and every swipe of Mr. Suh’s tongue.

As your hips raise higher and higher so does Mr. Suh’s face. Holding you steady he prods your entrance with his tongue, sucking up all of the juices that have since poured from you. 

“Don’t stop!” You moan. “Please don’t stop!” Darkness starts to take over your sight. The pressure in your stomach exploding into a million butterflies.

Gulping down your juices that starts to pour out of you once again, Mr. Suh wraps his arms around your legs keeping them in place, your pelvis raised in the air. 

“Come on, baby,” he says, face smushed into your pussy. “I need more from you.”  

Shaking in his hold, he moves his tongue up and down from your clit to your entrance again and again until the darkness turns into tiny stars. Finding comfort at your sensitive nub, he swirls his tongue around and around when a loud cry emits from you.

”F-FUCKKKK!!!!!!” 

You twist and try to get away from him when your orgasm takes you out like a freight train. Body quaking more liquid pours from you entering his mouth and onto the couch. Feeling like a fish out of water he uses all his strength to keep you onto the couch and not on the floor — still drinking you up as if he were dying of thirst. 

“I can’t! I can’t! I can’t!” You repeat still feeling his tongue on you. “I can’t!” Your hands flail to his hands tapping them to get him to stop.

Mr. Suh smiles and pulls back giving you small kisses on your clit, your mound and your inner thigh — nipping the inside of your left thigh before finally pulling away from you. 

“I could stay here forever,” he laps up your juices from his lips and chin while you lower yourself back down to the couch. Peeking up at you he kisses your clit one last time, earning a moan from you. “You really do have a delicious pussy,” he gives another kiss to your inner thigh. “Are you still with me?”

Shaking your head you lay there exposed in front of him too exhausted to move. “No…”

Laughing, Mr. Suh sits himself up and goes back to where he was sitting prior to making you a lifeless fuck doll. Giving your leg a little tap he calls to you. “Baby,” you barely have enough energy to look at him to see his sweet smile. Insatiable demon tutor! “Come to me.”

Sitting up lethargically, you find Johnny stroking his cock preparing himself for you. Bottom lip between your teeth, you stare at the man in front of you. How a woman would leave him is beyond your wildest imagination. Crawling towards him like a zombie, he wraps an arm around you as you get settled on his lap.

“How do you still have energy?” You ask him, forehead resting on top of his.

Chuckling, he holds you close to him. “I didn’t come three times in a row.” He gives you a little peck.

”And whose fault is that?” You retort.

”Hmm, I think it was a rather handsome tutor who has been fighting the urge day in and day out from kissing a certain student of his. He’s the culprit! Damn him!” 

“You’re a weird guy aren’t you?” You giggle nuzzling your nose against his. “But are you sure about this?” You ask him. “Once we start there’s no going back.” You hover above his length. 

Shocked by your sudden question, he eyes you carefully. “Are you having second thoughts?” 

“No.” His arms wrap around you, making you feel safe and secure. “But I’m not the one who’s married,” you lean back enough to lick his lips before placing a kiss upon them.

“Is it still a marriage when one person hasn’t called, sent a text, shown up in the last two years?” He nips along your jawline.

“No. I wouldn’t call that a marriage at all.” Reaching between your legs you take hold of his length positioning him at your entrance.

“I’m okay if you’re okay,” he whispers in your ear.

Slowly lowering yourself onto Mr. Suh’s cock the two of you hiss when your walls surround his length. Gripping your waist tightly he grits his teeth at the snug fit. 

“You’re so tight,” he clamps down on the side of your neck. “Fuck! So good!”

“N-No…” you gasp as you bottom out. “You’re just really big!”

Smirking against your skin, Johnny looks up at you. “Don’t move. Just sit here for a while,” he buries his face in the crook of your neck. “I haven’t felt this good in two years,” he sighs contently.

“Wait…You haven’t been with another woman in two years?!”

“No. I always thought…” he goes quiet. “Silly, isn’t it?”

“Not silly,” you stroke his hair gently. “It’s just messed up what she did to you. I mean I wouldn’t leave someone as handsome as you. As sweet and kind as you. As patient as you’ve been with me and this tutoring business.” You start to giggle which draws his attention. “And not to make it all about your dick, but like hell I’d leave a man who’s as big as you.” With a gentle thrust he buries himself deeper inside of you. “Ahhh!!!” You moan. “N-Not cool, Mr. Suh,” you tease. 

“Not gonna lie, it’s been kind of hot to hear you call me Mr. Suh this whole time. Especially now when I’m buried inside of you,” he thrusts upward again. 

“Oh really?” Leaning down to his ear you whisper gently. “Mr. Suh, I want you to make me cum again,” you bite his ear gently. 

Holding onto your waist, Johnny keeps you steady as you start to use his dick to get yourself off. Grinding on top of him, your arms rest behind you, hands on his knees — back arching to feel him rub against you in such a tantalizing way, you start to go cross-eyed. He feels too good to stop or to slow down. His massive cock reaching parts of you no other person, man or woman, has ever reached before. 

“Shit!” You shout when you finally slow down.

Falling forward, one of your hands rests on the back of the couch, and Johnny uses the opportunity to grab your breasts massaging them while you bounce on his cock.

”Aaahhh…” you moan when he pinches your nipples, your hips jutting forward at the slight pain. 

“Come on baby, make yourself cum,” he leans forward wrapping his mouth around your nipple. 

“Fuck~~~” you hiss.

Your hips move faster than ever, your climax getting closer and closer with each swivel of your pelvis. 

“S-So close…” you cry out. 

Biting down on your nipple, Johnny swirls your erect bud within his mouth. Each time the tiniest bit of pain turns into pleasure and shoots to your core. Your body starts growing warmer as you gear up for another orgasm, but you need more, you want more. Tapping his arm he pulls back from your breast with a pop.

Without a second thought you turn yourself around on his lap, back facing him, you slide down onto his cock reveling in the feeling of being filled to the brim. His hands at your hips, you lean back till your face is next to his. Holding the side of your face he kisses you gently while stuffing his cock into your pussy. 

He pummels your pussy, your back arching, hips bouncing on top of him. Reaching around you, his other hand rubs over your clit making you pull away from him and cry out.

”Again! Please!!!!” 

One hand holding onto your neck, the other rubbing over your pulsing bundle of nerves, Mr. Suh pushes his cock deep into your soaking core. Wet squelching noises fill the room along with your moans. Completely bare to the world you fall into a deep trance of lust. 

As you're bouncing on top, Mr. Suh takes his hand and gives your swollen clit a little slap — a small action having you jut your hips forward, your body shivering with pleasure. The word again comes out of your mouth as if it were your mantra, he shoves you down onto his cock while he rubs over your pussy, but not before he gives it another little slap, this time, you let out a guttural scream of pleasure. 

“Ahhhhh…shit!!!!” 

With each thrust of his hips into you, you slide up his cock little by little only to drench his length, the couch, and floor with your juices. Legs shaking, he holds onto you with one hand, the other snaking between your legs — fingers entering inside of you, moving quickly until you release again onto the floor. 

“Fucking love this pussy,” Mr. Suh growls into your ear as he yanks you backdown onto his cock. 

Neither of you waste time as you bounce on top of him again. Still sensitive from before your moans grow louder. Each thrust hitting every nerve of your body just right. Your heart pounds in your ears, as Mr. Suh once again rubs over your sensitive clit. In no time you’re screaming out that you're coming yet again and soon your body pulls away from him as you squirt onto his floor. 

“I’m not done with you yet,” he pulls you back down onto the couch.

Lifeless from the epitome of pleasure, he places you onto all fours while he gets behind you. Sliding into you, he grabs your hips and rams into you. 

Back arched, ass up in the air you cling onto the fabric of his couch — now soaked in your juices. Mr. Suh’s long thick cock drives into you, sparing you no mercy as your whimpers continue nonstop.

Wanting to feel him deeper inside of you, you start pushing yourself against him — ass flush against his hips.

“More…more…” you cry out.

Possessed by your own lust for him, you start bouncing on his lap — pussy gulping him down inch by inch. Mr. Suh’s groans getting drowned out by your desperation. 

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” You yell each time your hips meet his. 

Hunched over you, he digs his nails into your flesh as he pushes into you harder balls slapping against you. It wasn’t long until your eyes clench shut and your body starts to tremble. Moving faster Mr. Suh pushes you to lose your senses once more. 

“I-I-I’m coming!” You scream. 

Shoving his cock into you a few more times Mr. Suh pulls out just as you explode, your squirt pouring down onto your legs. Cupping your core, he eases you back down from your high while simultaneously driving you over the edge. 

“Lay down for me, okay?” He asks, kissing your cheek. 

Crawling onto the couch you flop down onto your back, arms and legs feeling like anchors on your body. Chuckling, he hovers over you, hiking one of your legs up to give him more room to move. Dazed you run your hands down his chest feeling the muscles of his body. Biting your lip, you try to keep yourself from coming undone just by the look and feel of him. 

“You’re so beautiful right now,” he smiles, bending down to give you a quick kiss on the lips while he teases your entrance. 

“S-Sure I am,” a shiver comes over you, your hips already moving against the tip of his cock. 

“Trust me, if only you could see how beautiful you look right now,” he rubs the tip of his cock over your swollen pulsing bud before sliding into you. 

Eyes closed you relish in the feeling of Mr. Suh being inside of you. All those days and weeks wanting to know what it was like could never paint a good picture of what it truly was like to be filled by the man above you. The roll of his hips as he goes deeper inside of you. The soft yet powerful thrusts, his body getting dangerously close to yours — trapping you beneath him, somehow getting squished under this man doesn’t sound like a bad idea. 

How he grips your body tightly, nails sinking into your skin causing just the right amount of pain to push you closer to your breaking point. Opening your eyes, you gasp seeing the sight above you. Mr. Suh’s hair drenched in sweat, his body glistening in the light of his lamps. Eyes dark and yet so full of… admiration, you can’t help but pull him down closer to you. Wanting nothing more than your bodies to be connected to each other. 

“I don’t want to squish you,” he chuckles in your ear. 

“Do it, I don’t care.” You wrap your legs just above his pelvis. “Crush me into this couch while you fuck me!” 

Grunting, Mr. Suh slams his hips into yours so hard you see nothing but black for a second. “Shit!” You screech holding onto him for dear life. 

Just like you asked, he doesn’t hold back anymore. His body lowering onto you completely, his hips grinding into yours fast and hard you’re shocked you haven’t been split in half already. Nails sliding down his back, he picks up his pace signaling he’s close. Hands going up to his hair, you grip the ends tightly begging for him to use you. 

“Fuck. That. Pussy!” You growl in his ears. “Shit! I love your dick so much,” you bite down on his ear. 

Like some kind of primal creature, Mr. Suh growls and moves his hips faster and deeper — crushing you into the couch, not caring at all whether or not he’s hurting you. The only thing he’s chasing is the high he's made you feel time and time again this afternoon. 

His breathing becomes ragged as do his thrusts and just as he pulls out of you, that powerful wave of euphoria washes over you. Pumping himself in his hand, Mr. Suh throws his head back as he cums — white strands landing on top of your clit and mound. 

“Sh-Shit!” He growls, his hand moving up and down his length quickly not stopping until he’s painted your pussy in every last drop of his cum. “Fuck~~” he exhales deeply, his body sinking back onto his knees. 

With his length still in his hand he leans forward rubbing the tip of his cock over your clit. You yelp, almost pulling away when suddenly your body starts to become hot. Your breathing quickens and before you know it, you scream as another wave of satisfaction makes you crumble beneath him. 

“F-F-Fuck!!!” He smirks, still rubbing over your swollen bundle of nerves. “O-Okay… okay…” you hold out your hands, body jerking and shaking. “I really can’t… no more, no more…” you cry out and giggle.

Pulling away from you, Mr. Suh takes a breather before tapping your legs that are sprawled out, a picture perfect view of your cum soaked core in front of him. Sitting up he opens his arms for you. Getting up to your hands and knees you crawl over to him only to melt in his arms and lap. 

“That was…” he starts a goofy smile on his face. 

“DAMN YOU!” You hit his chest playfully. “Now I won’t be able to have sex with anyone else.” 

Laughing, Mr. Suh wraps you tightly in his arms kissing the top of your head. “Good,” he pulls back far enough to see your face. “Because I’m far from done with you. I still haven’t punished you,” he squints.

”EHHH?!!!” 

A loud giggle and the slam of a door startles both you and Mr. Suh. Leaping up from the couch and his arms you scramble to get your clothes and throw him his. Both of you heading back to his study, you giggle as you both give each other sneaky touches that if it wasn’t for Lily coming home it would sure start up another round. 

Stepping into your pants and throwing on your bra and shirt, Mr. Suh has since put on his jeans and shirt and is trying to help you as best as he can. Grabbing your hand he pulls you out of his study, down the hall and heads straight for the kitchen. Taking out your binder you pretend that you have been working on your homework and studying when the door opens — just as Mr. Suh sits down next to you. 

”Daddy! Daddy!” 

“In the kitchen sweetheart,” he shouts, his chest heaving. 

Lily comes running into the kitchen with a huge stuffed animal in her tiny arms. “Daddy, look!” She holds out a tiger cub. “Isn’t she cute?!” 

“She’s adorable! Did you give her a name?”

”Kimmie!” 

“That’s a wonderful name,” Mr. Suh strokes her hair. “Is Uncle Jaehyun with you?”

”I’m here,” he saunters into the kitchen, more leisurely looking than what you’re used to. His hair isn’t slicked back neatly, but resting gently around his eyes. Though he still looks put together, a plain white t-shirt and denim jeans, on him — he’s just like a model from a clothing ad. 

“Uncle Jaehyun won it for me!” She jumps and down with the tiger in her arms. 

“Did he?” Mr. Suh smirks. “How long did it take you?”

”Too long…” he groans. “By the way what’s up with the huge wet mess on the couch?” 

Going stiff beside Mr. Suh you try to act normal. You try not to act like you’re the cause of the massive puddle that is slowly soaking into his furniture. Let alone, the floor which Mr. Jeong most likely saw as well. 

“We had to come into the kitchen after spilling some white wine on the couch. It was my fault. I tripped,” Mr. Suh laughs, scratching the back of his neck.

”And you just left the puddle of wine on the floor?” Mr. Jeong crosses his arms, his eyes going from Mr. Suh, to you. 

“I was just about to clean it up when you guys walked in,” he says with an eerie perkiness. “Lily, sweetheart, why don’t you go and put Kimmy upstairs with your other stuffed animals. Your uncle and I need to talk.”

”Okay daddy,” she hops over to Mr. Jeong and he instantly picks her up and gives her a huge hug and kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for taking me to the arcade Uncle Jeong.”

”You’re welcome,” he gives her one last kiss and she skips off to her bedroom.

The kitchen is quiet until Mr. Jeong hears footsteps above his head. Most likely Lily heading to her room. When the footsteps start to disappear, he stares accusingly at both Mr. Suh and yourself.

”What the hell is going on?” 

Getting up from the table, Mr. Suh heads towards a counter far off from where you’re seated and grabs a couple paper towels. Sinking in your seat you stay there before jumping up. 

“I-I can do that Mr. Suh! Plus, Mr. Jeong wanted to talk to you.”

”Seriously, Mr. Jeong? We’re not in class anymore, it’s Jaehyun.” 

“Sorry, Mr. Jaehyun.” You rush over and grab the paper towels and head for the mess you made before anyone could say anything else. 

Taking a peek at the mess Mr… Jaehyun mentioned, you cringe at the face he most likely made. He’s a smart man, there's no way he didn’t think up some kind of weird scenario in his head of what could have happened. And as much as Mr. Suh tried to cover it up, there is no way he’s going to believe that happened at all. 

Getting on your hands and knees you start to wipe up the puddles of your squirt you made on the floor. It wasn’t as much as you thought, most of it on the couch which you’ll have to fork over some of your shopping money to pay for a deep cleaning or a new couch for Mr. Suh. Your head hangs low as all of the different items you wanted to buy slowly become a wish instead of a dream. 

‘What’s your problem? I told you nothing happened!’ Mr.Suh’s voice travels into the living room. ‘Are you serious? That’s what you’re upset about?’ 

Sitting up you lean back trying to see what’s going on in there, but sadly there is no clear view into the kitchen from the living room. 

‘I told you that in confidence and you go behind my back?!’ Jaehyun shouts. ‘What kind of friend does that?’

Mr. Suh went behind his back? You start scooting closer and closer to the kitchen, still within the vicinity of your mess, but much closer to hear what’s really being said. 

‘Have you talked to her at all? Did you even ask her if she likes you? If you’re even her type?’

‘That isn’t what we’re discussing here!’ Jaehyun mumbles. ‘We’re discussing the obvious mess out in the living room!’ 

‘What are you trying to imply?’

Your body has now pressed itself onto the wall, heart pounding as Jaehyun’s voice becomes but a mere whisper… ‘you fucked her didn’t you?’ Waiting for Mr. Suh’s response, your arm that was wiping up your slick off the floor is now wiping a nonexistent mess in the air — your mind far too invested in the conversation both your… teachers are having in the other room. 

‘Why would you think that?’ Mr. Suh replies, his voice steady.

‘THERE IS A FUCKING MESS OUT IN THE LIVING ROOM! Do you think I buy that bullshit about spilling white wine?’

‘Why would you automatically go to sex? Why isn’t it believable that we both sat down for a glass of wine and it spilled?’

‘Where are the glasses? Where is the bottle? Hmmm?’

Mr. Suh doesn’t say a single word. Jaehyun was right, there is absolutely no way that Johnny can get out of this one. Not even you can think of an excuse that would be good enough to use. 

‘Please just tell me you didn’t fuck her… not after I confessed I had feelings for her. Please tell me you didn’t do it, please.’

Your eyes widen at Mr. Jeong’s words. He has a crush on… you shake your head. That can’t be, he’s your teacher! There’s no way in hell he could like you! Even if he did, there's no way that you can date him, it’s unethical! Not to mention…you take the risk and peek around the corner to see both Mr. Jeong and Mr. Suh sitting down at the kitchen table — Mr. Jeong waiting, pleading for Mr. Suh to answer him. 

‘I’m sorry, Jaehyun.’

Jumping up from his chair, Mr. Jeong knocks it over and it crashes to the floor making you jump. ‘Are you fucking kidding me, man? What is wrong with you? I would never do that to you! So why?’ He slams his hands down on the table, ‘why?!’ He shouts.

‘She doesn’t belong to you, Jaehyun. She has choices that she can make on her own. It wasn’t planned and I wasn’t plotting against you. It just… happened,’ he sighs. ‘I don’t regret it, all I regret is that you’re upset with me.’

‘It just happened? Is that what you’re going for? Shit man! I told you once she wasn’t my student anymore I was going to ask her out! What is your —

“I would have said no.” You storm into the kitchen. 

Spinning towards you, Mr. Jeong’s shoulders fall from his ears. “You were listening?”

“You weren’t exactly being quiet.” You take the wet paper towels and put them in the trash. “No matter if you asked me the moment I passed your class or a year from now I would have said no. It would be unethical for you to date a student, a former one at that when they’re still actively going to school where you work.”

“She’s not wrong,” Mr. Suh chuckles. 

“Shut up!” Both Mr. Jeong and yourself say in unison. 

“It was never going to be you, Mr… Jaehyun. I hope you understand. If I led you on in any way I apologize, it was never my —”

He holds up a hand. “You didn’t lead me on, ever. These feelings are mine alone.”

“Where does that leave us?” Mr. Suh stands and walks over to you. “Would you be against us, if we…” he looks down at you. 

“If we become a couple?” You finish his statement. 

Running a hand through his hair Jaehyun shakes his head. “There is one thing standing in your way, pal. You’re still married. What if she comes back? Are you going to drop everything and go back to her?”

Shit… You glance up at Mr. Suh. There is no way he will choose you over his wife, not the woman he’s stayed abstinent for…until now and certainly not the mother of his child. He’d always choose…

“I never plan to leave. I waited for two years. My life has been on hold for two years, I’m not going to let anyone make it stop again. I’ll file for divorce immediately and ask her parents to give her the papers. I should have done this already.” He wraps an arm around your waist. “It’s about time I find someone who makes me happy.”

The room goes silent once more as you wait for Jaehyun to give his blessings or walk out. His eyes roam over yours, but when he turns away the tiniest bit of a smile comes to his lips and you know that everything is going to be fine.

“Damn bro, I’m not her dad.” He chuckles.

“No, you’re just the guy who wanted to fuck me too.” You smile brightly. 

“HEY!” Jaehyun shouts. “I wanted to at least take you out on a few dates first,” he clarifies, a boyish grin across his face.  “But unlike this guy over here,” he gestures to Johnny. “I would have put out some towels first.”

“Really? Jokes already?” Mr. Suh rolls his eyes.

Shrugging he walks out of the kitchen and to the door, both you and Mr. Suh following behind. “Your girlfriend started it. Now just because you’re dating my best friend don’t you dare think for a second I won’t fail your ass!” He warns opening up the door. “You’ve worked this hard don’t throw it away from some —”

”And he’s leaving,” Mr. Suh shoves Jaehyun through the frame of the door. 

“See you at school Mr. Jeong!” You wave goodbye. 

Smirking, he gives you a small wave before leaving. “I expect high marks on your final. Don’t disappoint me.” 

The next couple of weeks were rough. Every day you were grilled from the moment you arrived at Mr. Suh’s house to the moment you packed up to go home for your final exam. It didn’t matter that Mr. Suh fucked you stupid or that you squirted all over his couch and his floor, the couch needing a deep cleaning — even then you still offered to pitch in to get him a new one, but he waved off the offer. The choking, biting, blowjob, everything didn’t matter in his eyes. The only thing that mattered was you would pass Mr. Jeong’s course. 

So you studied. You ignored every throb and clench of your clit and entrance when he would lean in close to you. You swallowed down the urge to climb onto his lap at the kitchen table and have him fuck you while you answered any and all math questions he threw your way. You ignored everything that your body wanted because you too wanted to pass Mr. Jeong’s class. 

What you didn’t expect are your legs shaking non stop while you wait for your final exam grade. The year prior you went into your classroom, took the final exam and left — finding out later what your grade was, but not in Mr. Jeong’s class. This time you needed to meet up at the computer lab because your exam was online, your grade being tallied immediately after you finished, or so you thought. 

You didn’t calculate that all of your other classmates were taking the same test, at the same time and were finishing up around the same time as you. A few people sat back and stared into space, others laid their head down until whenever they felt an appropriate amount of time passed. But you just stared at your computer screen until your eyes started to cross. 

Peeking above your screen to where Mr. Jeong sat at the main desk in the room, reading a book, your eyes met his as he scanned the room. He didn’t say anything but raised his brow. Lowering back into your seat you hear a ding startling not just you but other classmates as one by one your grades are shown. 

Your heart sinks to your stomach. This couldn’t be happening. Hands grip your shoulders from behind making you shout and quickly cover your mouth. 

“I’d like to speak with you after class about your grade.” Mr. Jeong whispers. 

“Uh, yes, Mr. Jeong.”

Sighing, you shake your head when he walks away checking in on other students who were still taking their exams. 

Twenty minutes pass and your math final exam is over and done with. The only other class you needed to complete was a Special Education course in which you just had to turn in your observations from shadowing a teacher for a week as well as write an essay. That class, you’d actually miss, but Mr. Jeong’s… it will be a blessing if you never step foot in this room with him again! 

The last couple of people pack up their things and leave the room. Mr. Jeong erases the white board before turning your way, a smirk plastered on his face. 

“Would you please come up front so we can talk?”

Gathering your backpack you walk up to the front of the classroom, a chair already near the main desk waiting for you, spectacular. 

“So, how bad is it?” You ask plopping down on the seat. “Give it to me straight, no sugar coating Mr. Jeong.” 

“Jaehyun.” He corrects you.

”Still on campus, Mr. Jeong.”

Chuckling, he leans on the desk next to you. “Yeah, but I’m no longer going to be your teacher. So the formalities can drop when we see each other in private.”

”It doesn’t matter if you’re going to be my teacher or no —” you cut yourself off realization coming to you. “Wait… you’re not going to be my teacher anymore?”

Shaking his head, Mr. Jeong smiles. “Nope.”

“Does that mean…?”

Nodding, he takes a slip of paper from the desk and writes down your new final grade. “You have passed this class with a C-.” 

“A C-?” Your eyes go from amazed to grumpy. “I thought it would have at least been a C+ borderline B…” you grumbled.

Taking one of his folders he hits you on the head with it. “Do you not know how shitty your grades were before Johnny started to help you? I’m amazed you even had a passing grade. You did well and I seriously owe Johnny a huge favor.” He snickers. “Or maybe you can just do him a favor,” he wiggles his brows. 

“Mr. Jeong, I don’t think it’s appropriate for you to talk about your students' love life at all.”

”Damn… nothing?” He asks. Shaking your head no, he eyes you up and down. “How does that even happen? From the mess you made I would have assumed the two of you would fuck each other’s brains out every time you’re together.” He clicks his tongue. “Still hate that I sent you to him.”

Laughing, you stand up. “Like I said, Mr. Jeong, you wouldn’t have stood a chance.” You bend down to meet him eye to eye. “Plus, I would mess up your apartment.”

Leaning forward his face inches from your own, “leather couch and that faux wooden flooring. Perfect at preventing scuff marks and for spills of all kinds.” 

Reaching up you ruffle his hair, mess it all up and walk away. “See you around, Jaehyun.”

”You better work your ass off tonight and show him how thankful you are!” 

“Sure thing!” You wave, but when you reach for the doorknob you pause. “Jaehyun,” your voice goes soft. 

“Yeah?” He stands from the desk gathering his belongings. 

“Thanks for the help you gave me too. If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have gotten the help I needed. You didn’t need to do that. I mean you guys already have our money. Whether we fail or not… that’s up to us. But you didn’t want me to fail and I didn’t want to fail either. This passing grade goes to you as well. Please never stop helping your students.”

”My place, ask Johnny for directions and you can show me how much I helped you,” he gives you an almost similar smirk that Mr. Suh gave you, must be something they both learned. He bumps your shoulder as you both stand in front of the door. “But seriously, it’s no problem at all. It would look terrible on my record if too many students failed my class,” he places his hand over yours and makes you turn the doorknob. 

“You can repay me by not breaking his heart. I can’t watch him fall apart again.”

”I would never hurt him, Jaehyun. Honest. Even if we do end up breaking up if he ever needed me…”

Pushing you out the door with his hands he closes the door behind you two. “Good. He’s a great guy and he loves hard. It’s never a game with him. If you need to go slow and take your time, which I suggest,” you both walk down the hall to the elevator. “Please just make sure that he’s never kept in the dark with your feelings. It’s not my place to say any of this, but honestly, what his soon to be ex-wife did to him… it was pretty bad.”

”I’m still trying to wrap my head around a mother leaving her child for two years without contact.”

”There are things that even Johnny and I don’t understand.”

”Jaehyun, do you think if she ever comes back Mr. Suh… Johnny will go to her without a second thought about me?” You ask, stepping into the elevator, thank heavens for it being empty aside from Jaehyun and yourself.

“I can’t say for certain if he would or would not.” He pushes the button for the first floor. “They were in love from the moment they saw each other. It was back when we were freshmen in college. Everyone on campus knew them as the “it” couple. He was in a fraternity and she was in a sorority. He played sports and she loved anything to do with the arts. 

“On the outside they may seem different but when you saw them together,” the elevator doors open and you both step out heading for the main doors of the building. “It was as if they were supposed to be together. Two souls that searched the heavens and earth to be together. I’m not saying this to scare you off,” he opens one of the doors and allows you to step out into the crisp winter air. 

“I know.” You whisper.

”All you need to know is that something happened. Whatever that something was, I don’t know and neither does Johnny. He’s tried to reach out to her friends and family but all they’ve said is that they can’t talk.”

”Could it have been something he did? Something he doesn’t know?”

Shrugging, Jaehyun wraps his navy blue scarf around his neck, putting his hands into his coat pockets. “It could be, but if he did do something he doesn’t know what he did.” 

“It still doesn’t excuse the fact that if he did something to make her mad — she refused to speak or even acknowledge her own child for two years.”

”Which is why I’m happy you came along. I genuinely never heard or seen him as happy as he is with you for quite some time — more than two years in fact. Speaking of happiness, let's get away from this dreary subject. What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

”I was going to go over to Mr. Suh’s house and hang out before meeting some friends for a girl’s night. A small get together before the winter break.”

”And you’re going back home this winter?”

Stopping in your tracks you look up at Jaehyun realizing that you never once discussed winter plans with Mr. Suh or your family. In fact, you were so busy studying you never asked him if you guys were official. If he and Lily would like to come over during the break. Would it be too early for them to meet your family?!

”Uhhhh…” your eyes start to shake. 

“Calm down,” Jaehyun pats your shoulder. “Johnny and Lily visit his parents during Christmas. So there, now you don’t have to freak out.”

”Jackass…” you grumble before walking away from him.

”My suggestion,” he says, jogging up to you. “Spend New Year’s with him. He’s always at home with Lily.”

”I’ll bring everything up with him when I see him.” You reassure. 

“Sure you will,” he claps you on the back before moving away from you. “I’m parked this way. Make sure you celebrate! It was nice having you in class.” He waves while heading in the direction of his car. 

“Thanks for everything, Mr. Jeong!” You shout smirking as you go back to addressing him formally. 

Giving you a gritted teeth smile he shouts, “your welcome!”

It wasn’t until your normally scheduled time that you head over to Mr. Suh’s. Primary and secondary schools didn’t get to go on Winter break for two more weeks, while you were free to come and go as you pleased. However, living two hours away from the University wasn’t ideal for meeting up to see Mr. Suh and even see Lily. 

You needed to talk to him about what you were going to do going forward. Now that he’s no longer your tutor, you won’t need him (hopefully) while you finish out your years in school; so knowing where you two stand needs to be a topic for discussion. 

Pulling onto Mr. Suh’s street, your hands start to grow clammy. You made sure to tell him as well as Jaehyun that you wanted to be the one to say what your final grade is. No secret text messages between the two of them. Face to face is what you wanted, whether you passed or failed. 

Now a few houses from Mr. Suh’s you sit up in the driver’s seat to find his car is parked in the driveway. A huge smile coming to your face, but the smile soon fades. Not only was his car in the driveway, but an unknown car is parked next to him. Slowly, you park where you normally do at the end of the driveway and you put your car in park. 

Taking out your phone you shoot him a quick message: 

I’m outside. 

There’s another car in your driveway. 

Is it safe to come inside?

You wait for a reply back, but nothing. He doesn’t even look at it. Thinking it’s best to wait for a little longer, you scroll through some of the text messages and social media posts to pass the time until he hopefully answers back, but he never does. 

The chill of the evening starts to creep around you, making you hug your body. It wouldn’t be rude to at least ring the doorbell and make sure that it’s either safe to come inside despite him having a guest or that you need to go back to your dorm, right? 

Shaking your head, you grab your purse, phone and keys. You can’t just wait until the person inside leaves, or for Mr. Suh to pick up his phone to read the message — you’d become a human popsicle by then. Closing your car door you hesitantly make your way up the pathway to his front door. Your mind racing with a million thoughts of how this was both okay to do and rude. 

But for all you know it could be a friend of his over for a quick visit before leaving, just like you. With this thought in mind you ring the doorbell and give the door a light knock. Stepping back you wait patiently for the door to open. It doesn’t take long for Mr. Suh to come to the door but instead of greeting you, he scrambles out of the door, closing it behind him.

”You can’t be here right now,” he whispers. “You need to go. I’ll call you tomorrow and you can come over.”

”I’m leaving tomorrow. I wanted to talk to you about that actually. Is someone inside?”

”Yes, but really you need to —”

”Sweetheart, what’s going on?” A female’s voice calls from the front door. “Who’s out there?” 

“For the love of…” he growls. “Look, you need to go. We’ll talk after you come back from your break. But please, let me explain everything!” He turns you around to your car.

”Johnny what is going on? Who is she?” The woman’s voice sounds closer than before. Looking back you see a rather beautiful woman standing behind him. Her arms crossed over her chest, hip jutted out and eyes bouncing from you to Johnny. “Who is she?”

Stepping around Mr. Suh you walk up to her with a huge smile on your face. “Hi, I’m Mr. Suh’s student. He’s been tutoring me this semester. I just came by to tell him I passed.” Your smile falters as you turn to face him.

”Y-You did?” He searches your eyes for anything that will let him know you’re not mad at him. “That’s wonderful news.”

”Johnny’s always been the smartest man I’ve known,” the woman walks over to him linking her arm with his. “It’s one of the reasons I married him…” 

[kcalsforhim]

friday 8 november 2024 - 𐙚 ˚🍰 ⋆｡˚⊹❀˖°

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cals : 804 steps : 10.6 k

breakfast : 9 magere knakworstjes, my mom ate one bless her. a tiny dish of ketchup i didnt finish... 1 thin rice cake thing with some cream cheese on one half and some jam on the other half

dinner : fried fish, potato salad and green iceberg lettuce ?? macarons as well cause...

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okay so i woke up kind of at a normal time for breakfast... my mom made me this food and it was ok ! i made the rice cakes cause idk i was craving it sigh. dinner was amazing too, haku would not eat that fish but like... i didnt have a replacement protein or carb and sigh otherwise i would be eating only salad. he said it was ok. just pretend the fish was salad (this meal is one of my comfort foods it was SO GOOOOOD i love this dish).

i finished the macaroons because they have been in the fridge for a while and like... its fine.

my movement i obviously got my steps in but like... the way that i only had 3 k after dinner so i had to force myself on the walk pad untill i hit 10 k. like... actually painful. i always tell myself my walk goal is for the greater good but im literally programmed to be lazy sigh... i was talking to eli about this earlier... in my ideal life i would cook and clean the house and get my steps in on a pad and dress up and maybe do grocories and never work a day in my life... have somebody's bank card so i can order myself cute clothes and be a trophy wife like... sigh... anyways...

today my minecraft phonecase... creeper plushie... hairclips and MADOKA FIGURE CAME IN. im so excited about the figure i put her smack dab on my desk so i could always look at it !!! thank u eli for treatming me like ur trophy wife like actually u get me everything i want... hihi....

today i also received my half of an art trade im doing with geon... he drew my oc so well im never changing my pfp on twt like im just forever gunna have that pfp im literally i almost cried when i saw it cause i actually rarely if ever like the art others make of that character and geon put me RIGHT so thank u i know u will never see this entry but ily sigh

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i took these pictures in the morning and like... i look ok. my stomach bloating is finally going down but im STILL too scared to weigh myself...... sigh... im such a coward LOL... should i do it rn ? idk ive been drinking a whole ass monster... ok i regret that so bad LMFAOOOO its not even that bad i havent shite since yesterday, i worked out for an hour, ive been drinking energy drinks... its logical but sigh. after this metab week u could call it im so relieved to go back to high res

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here is some gorg thinspi that makes me wanna kms like... actually ur so gorgous and u look so beautiful existing when is it my turn... especially the second pic im SICKKKK.

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me like... actually humming this while i go insane in the assylum... HAHA

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[chikkou]

ok i was waiting until my laptop got here to finally tell all the bullshit thats happened in the last like. 5 months lol. cause its a lot to type

im gonna put it all under the cut so no one has to read if they dont want. its a LONG fucking story.

tl;dr:

ok so for basic background, for the last two years or so, i was living with a roommate in connecticut. the roommate was my (now former) best friend since middle school. in july of this year his behavior totally shifted, and he started picking fights with me out of nowhere, told our high school friends a bunch of straight up lies abt me to make me look like a horrible roommate & person, and just generally became a two-faced dickhead. in the end, it turned out to all be excuses to justify his decision to move out (unofficially, name was still on the lease) so that he could live with his boyfriends and not pay any bills. at the time i was really devastated by this bc i felt totally betrayed by this person i had been close to since i was 12/13, but frankly after everything else that happened i barely fucking think about it now LMAO. this is set dressing more than anything else

so anyway, i had been living alone since about august, that was the last time i saw him in person. i wasnt handling the situation well because i had spoken to my high school friend and found out the extent to which hed tried to paint me as a slovenly, horrible roommate, to the point of telling actual lies about really dumb stuff (which didnt work btw - my friends, god bless them, were more concerned about my mental health than anything and thought i was going down a depression spiral, which my former friend told them he was helping me through. they believed me right away once we finally did talk). all that is to say, i was going kind of crazy lol, and i decided to go back home in october just for a short while, to recharge my batteries and all.

i was gone for a couple of weeks, not very long. i felt MUCH better after being with my family & friends in person, as i felt pretty isolated from everyone (my hometown is in new york, i was only 2 hours away by train but scheduling times to visit was sort of a hassle, so i only did it once every couple months). my grandfather and mom dropped me off at my apartment in early november, we were very lighthearted and discussing my next steps, since my shithead friend had been behind on rent more than 5 times (i always paid my half on time) and i was facing eviction because of it. we get to my apartment, i go to open the door, and it wont open. not that its locked, it just straight up WONT open. my grandpa tried to ram the door with his shoulder, and nothing. hes a strong ass dude, and this door wouldnt budge for anything.

my mom managed to get the kitchen window open and climb in that way, and it took both her and my grandpa pulling/pushing at the same time to force the door open. i wont even dress this up: there was mold. fucking. everywhere. on the floor, on the walls, all over everything i owned. i have pictures (had to take them for insurance) and im not even going to show them because they are beyond fucking disgusting. everything i owned was soaked in water and mold, and i do literally mean EVERYTHING. it was very warm in there too, like the temperature of a swamp. i was in a haze after that. i just remember sobbing, like genuinely heartbroken sobbing, as i wandered around looking at everything that was ruined. my mom & grandpa had to go and get maintenance because i was just utterly useless, and they were equally horrified & said they'd never seen anything like it.

i managed to save some items that were irreplaceable (journals, notebooks, etc) and whatever clothes werent utterly soaked in mold. all of my cookware, my books, my laptop & desktop (i cried the hardest when i saw the desktop) - it was all ruined. we found out later that the water boiler in my apartment had a catastrophic failure while i was gone, which caused it to constantly send water back through the pipes, empty, and refill itself. my bedroom was directly above the boiler downstairs, so it got the most significant amount of damage. all told, i lost like 95% of the things i owned. it is possible that i could have saved more, but the amount of mold in that apartment made it a genuine safety hazard for me to even be in there, so i had very limited time to grab what i could. the cruelest irony of all that? my shithead ex-friend's room, which was on the other side of the hallway, was pretty much untouched. he lost absolutely nothing lol.

so immediately, i had to leave the state. i moved back to ny with my family. my mother - who had a stroke last year following a diagnosis of an exceedingly rare neurological disorder, AND had two separate brain surgeries to improve her quality of life - was in the process of getting evicted. the landlord didnt give a fuck about any of my moms situation, not her being disabled, not her being widowed, not her having 3 kids under the age of 18 to care for - he just wanted her out so he could increase the cost of rent on our house. at the same time as all this was going on, i got saddled with a $600 electric bill (likely caused by the water heater's malfunction), which neither insurance nor the apartment would pay, so it came out of my pocket. in addition, i found out in december that i was also getting laid off.

we had nowhere to go and couldnt afford to live anywhere in the tri-state area. we had no choice but to move somewhere much cheaper, and since my mom already had a friend living in a mid-atlantic state, we chose to move there. the eviction went through in january and we had less than 2 weeks to pack all our shit, find a place to live, and get the fuck out. needless to say, we were not successful lol.

we stayed in my grandparents 1 bedroom apartment for about a week, then all of us drove down together to stay with my moms friend in her 3 bedroom apartment (she has 5 kids, 3 of whom live in the apartment). my moms apartment, which was supposed to have been ready by january 31st, still had people actively living there. the property manager kept promising us it would be next week for the entire month of february, to the point that my mom got fed up and chose to rent a small house instead. the reality of being essentially homeless for that time was beyond horrifying, and having anywhere between 8-10 people in that house (my cousin also moved with us, but he stayed in a hotel for the first week) was more taxing than i can express.

but things have gotten a lot better since then. i also found a cute little house to rent just up the road from my moms, and its very cheap for its size. i still havent found a job yet, but thanks to what was essentially the liquidation of everything i owned, ill be ok for a couple months more. im slowly but surely repurchasing all the things i lost and trying to acclimate to the new environment. things are still not totally stable right now, but they are slowing down, and at this point thats all i can really ask for lol.

so yeah. if u were wondering why i suddenly stopped posting after literal years of posting every day, thats why LMAO

[deadcrybabysmut]

took two tabs of acid 12 hours ago and im still reeling. today has been a chaotic rollercoaster of laughter, tears, and anger—so much fucking anger.

i don't know how I would have managed to make it through the day if it weren't for the two people who understand me and see me and resonate with me the most. they grounded me. especially when i couldn't handle my trip going south when their shitty mom came home and fucked up the vibe.

anyway i wanna sort of get out what happened tonight in this post so i can essentially look back on it later 🤸🏽‍♀️

also, every one of our seven cats avoided me like the plague while tripping and that made me so fucking sad, until i realized i was probably freaking them out lmao which is understandable and if I were them I'd have told me to go fuck myself too tbh

ok so when i initially took the tabs, i was already twenty minutes into watching I Am a Hero which I lowkey was expecting to be horrific—boy was I fucking WRONG 🤡🤡🤡 this movie was too fucking funny FOR WHAT?

—had me crying about what I would do if the only foods available during the apocalypse were all the ones I hated (i would simply die bc ain't no way im eating eggs or pork or seafood like what kind of shit is that?? 😵🤮🤮) THEN I started thinking about the mfs who would get bit and not say anything! like BITCH HELLO????? WHY MUST WE SUFFER BC YOU WERE THE WEAK LIIINK???!! but then I was like lol same 🤭 bc fuck you lucky mfs. yeah, im butthurt and y'all ain't gon know until it's too late oop 💁🏽

there was also some weird "i shouldn't be a creep bc she's a high schooler and it's a crime" type moment which led to me giggling about how Hideo really almost became a meal for copping a feel??? idk shit was funny in the moment really and hearing HOW the girl got bit before all that, made it so much funnier (spoiler: it was by some stupid baby lol what a loser. to get turned by someone with six baby teeth lmfaoo couldn't be me. anyway...)

there's only one zombie I have to talk about—THAT FUCKING ATHLETIC ONE. bitch ain't no way mans was training that entire time for that fucking hard, and no one put it together???!?! I saw dude's caved in head and how he would THROW HIMSELF onto his head FOR FUN and I just KNEW we needed to keep an eye on that mf. he killed that shit tbh 🤣🤣

anyway by the end of the movie i had already cried twice about having to eat eggs if zombies were running rampant lmao and i damn near had a stroke laughing at ol girl becoming half a zombie bc of the six baby teeth that scraped the back of her neck. LIKE????? idk. fortunately, 10/10 recommend watching on acid / would do again! maybe! 👉🏼👉🏼

*just gonna throw in here that we started watching Robin Hood Men in Tights immediately after this, and if you've seen that movie, you KNOW that shit was hilarious! throw in an acid trip and it's a fucking masterpiece 💀 unfortunately we didn't get through it all because shitty mom showed up and pissed everyone off bc she refused to eat anything all day and decided it would be everyone's problem! we made her food, she didn't eat it. her husband bought her food, she didn't eat it. instead, she cried about feeling nauseous, picked a fight with her husband over nothing, then told us she was leaving to her mom's house. 😐😐 After reassuring me they were ok, I made my siblings go to bed and spent two hours talking myself down I was so fucking livid. I'm still very much wide awake and functional, but I really don't want to be soo I'm going to force myself to crash I guess???

[helliontherapscallion]

Anon who’s dog had a seizure. I wanted to be able to give a positive update, but I won’t be able to. I was woken up by a call at around 1:30am from my mom and the first thing she said was “[my dogs name] died”

I don’t know all the details, I was in a full fledge panic attack and was overcome with despair when it was either explained to me or I overheard (frankly, I don’t remember) but apparently at some point either last night or veryyyyy early this morning my mom let the dog out to use the restroom, and he collapsed again similarly to how he did two days ago. My mom rushed him to the emergency vet (a thirty minute drive) but he didn’t even make it there.

I think I was dry heaving at some point because my panic was so bad. I ended up going to the vet with my dad so I could say goodbye (he had before my mom left with the dog) and ngl, going with him did not help in the slightest. My dad has NPD and he kept making the situation about himself and I stg I was ready to throw myself out the car window in the middle of the freeway and walk the rest of the way there OOP—

I was afraid we wouldn’t be able to because of Covid, but we were allowed to all head into the vet and hold him and give proper goodbyes before they took him to be cremated (they have a partnership with some place that does all that jazz). It was rough. He’s a small dog, only 18 pounds, but just holding him felt so different. There was no resistance when I picked him up (I’m not his favorite person lol, so he’d always deadpan and shuffle away a little from me before giving in whenever i’d make grabby hands hahaha) and it was just rough.

A year and a half ago my old bird passed away in that same emergency vet, so I just felt like I was suffocating the whole time. It was basically history repeating itself and I had a ✨mental breakdown✨ while cradling the pooch. My mom almost had to drag me out 2.5 hours later because I didn’t want to leave him. I tried to be strong, he was her dog in the end and they had an unbreakable bond. I should’ve been the one comforting her, not the other way around. I totally failed lol.

Thank god I was able to go home with my mom and not my dad. I wanted to be the one to drive home so she could rest, but I didn’t have the energy to protest when I saw she was already in the drivers seat.

We’ve had him since he was a few months old. I was in first grade at the time, and despite us having a very rocky start (young me didn’t like all the attention he received bc it used to be mine) he was my lil buddy and I would have done anything for him. I was looking forward to taking my senior and graduation pictures with him soon, but it seems like that won’t be happening. I just wish I did more with him.

Sorry for rambling and being so depressing! I haven’t gotten much sleep over the past two nights so I’m really out of it.

If it’s not too much to ask for, could I have a part ii of my previous request but have it involving what I wrote above? Asdfghjkl my depressed ass needs comfort and all of my friends are in school LOL. (Thank god I was called off from school this time) Plus, I don’t wanna make my mom feel worse by adding my grief on top of her own (I hope that made sense)

Part 1

(A/N): anon, I’m so sorry to hear about your dog. From what you sent me about him, he sounded like an absolute delight to be around and a very good boy. You deserve to grieve too, even if you don’t think you should. Grieving is healthy and it’s something that shouldn’t be ignored. Everyone grieves differently, so maybe you and your mom could reminisce on the good times with him? Only if you both feel comfortable doing so of course. Please get some sleep, drink plenty of water, and eat some food if you haven’t already. My DMs are always open if you ever want to talk <3

Warnings: death of a dog and bird (mentioned), panic attacks, NPD parent mention

You were jolted awake by a loud ring from your phone laying on your nightstand. It was the ringtone you specifically set for your mom. Blinking deliriously, you answered with a raspy, “mom?”

You were only met with her choked sobs on the other end. This woke you up completely as you turned on a lamp and sat up fully in your bed, “mom what’s wrong?”

“(Dog name)...” She was unable to say your dog's name before she broke into more harsh sobbing. Worry and fear pricked your gut at the mention of your dog’s name. “What about (dog name)? What’s going on?”

“He d-died, (y/n). He isn’t suffering anymore.” You felt as if ice cold water was poured onto you as you sat staring at the wall in shock. Faintly you heard your mom telling you how it happened, but you didn’t register her words. The words that came out of your mother’s mouth were nearly incomprehensible anyways due to her distress. You didn’t know when she hung up, but the next time you looked at the phone screen your homescreen met you: a picture of you, Techno, Wilbur, and Tommy at an amusement park. 

Your panic attack had escalated to you dry heaving over the toilet after puking up your dinner. You felt like you were suffocating as you remembered the techniques Techno used a few days prior. You stumbled up from a crouch and scrambled over to the sink. Your hands could barely grab the faucet and turn it on as you lost most of your sense of spatial awareness and everything you touched felt distant, like every single synapse in your body was both simultaneously working in overdrive and failing at the same time. The water was as cold as it was going to get, so you plunged your hands into the liquid and felt your body jolt at the temperature. After a while, your hands turned numb after regaining some senses back so you shakily cupped your hands under the faucet and gathered water into your hands. You splashed it at your face and felt yourself becoming more grounded as time passed.

By the time you left the bathroom, your dad gathered you into the car and started to drive you to the emergency vet. The entire time he was ranting about how you needed to pull yourself together because the dog was closer to him than to you. That definitely did not help in any way, it made you want to jump out of the car and walk the rest of the way to the vet. It would be better than having someone constantly belittling you for grieving. The ride was hell, but you persevered for (dog name). You needed to say goodbye to him.

When you left the car and walked into the building, it felt as if you were walking through the nine rings of hell with blazing infernos licking at your skin with every step. Dread and despair filled and overwhelmed you with every step. 

When a nurse escorted you to the room, she offered you her condolences and left you to say goodbye. With wide eyes, you slowly walked over to your mom and saw the motionless bundle of fur in her hands. It looked like he was sleeping, but you knew better. She looked at you with so much heartbreak and sadness as tears slipped down her cheeks that you remembered that he was her dog in the end and they’ve always had an unbreakable bond. You needed to be strong for her.

Your stony facade broke the second your mom handed you (dog name). He was cold and stiff as he laid unmoving in your arms, not even trying to wiggle out of your embrace like he always did. You were never his favorite person. He felt so… different. So wrong. 

Time passed around you as you held him and cried into his fur. This situation was very similar to your previous one that happened about a year and a half ago when your bird passed away and that was what finally sent you over the edge. Before you knew it, your mom was dragging you out of the building so he could get cremated. Your dad had long since gone home so he could get ready for work, so that left you to ride home with your mom. Not that you were complaining, it was certainly better than riding home with your dad. You just wished that you could drive so she could get some rest. 

By time you got home, it was about the same time you would leave for school. As you were driving down your neighborhood, you saw a very familiar car pass you. It was Techno, Wilbur, and Tommy’s car. They were probably going to school. You kept your head down and stared intensely at your tightly clasped hands. 

The second the car was in park in your driveway, you made a beeline for your room. For the rest of the day, you hid underneath your covers and ignored the incessant buzzing of your phone on the nightstand. You spent that time alone having a panic attack. This was your longest and most intense one yet, by the time it finally calmed down it was 10:30 at night. 

You smacked your dry lips together and feel absolutely drained. The buzzing still wouldn’t let up, so you reached out with a shaky hand and opened your phone. You had at least eighty combined missed texts from Wilbur, Tommy, and Techno. 

Tuesday, Innit?

Yo, the fuck’s goin on? 

Why the hell did you ignore us when we passed you???

Music man take me by the hand lead me to the land

Ignore that dumbass

What’s going on? You weren’t at school today

(Y/n)?

Technology Sword

You don’t have to tell us what happened if you’re not comfortable

Just tell us if you’re okay

That was only the start of the messages in the group chat. Granted it was mostly Tommy spamming your name and Wilbur and Techno trying to get him to chill out, but some of the messages managed to calm the swirling panic inside of you slightly. Your phone buzzed as you got another text. This time, it was an individual one from Technoblade.

Technology Sword

Look out your window, grab your notebook

You raised your eyebrows slightly as you read the message. Your window was right across from Technoblade’s, so when you saw Taylor Swift’s “You Belong With Me” music video and showed it to Techno, you both decided that this would be your primary communication before you eventually got phones. It wasted a ton of paper, but you both felt like the main characters in a story so you kept doing it. You hadn’t done this since you got your phone and he got his. 

After you grabbed your spare notebook and a sharpie, you sat up in your bed and turned on your lamp. When you opened your curtains, you saw Techno smiling at you before he grabbed his notebook and wrote ‘hello’. 

You uncapped your marker, wrote ‘hi’, and shakily raised it to him. You saw him frown at your shakiness, he wrote ‘you okay?’

You stared at your paper for a bit contemplating whether or not you should tell him the truth. It was no use in lying to him, he knew you better than you knew yourself. After a moment, you wrote ‘no’.

You watched as he frowned and his eyebrows crinkled together in an upwards slant. ‘Discord?’

‘Sure’

You closed your curtains once more and opened up your PC. You could already see that Techno, Wilbur, and Tommy were in a separate voice channel. When you joined, you were startled by Tommy’s loud screaming and Wilbur’s hysterical laughter. 

“WILBUR YOU PRICK WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT I WORKED SO HARD GETTING THAT NETHERITE!” 

They were interrupted by a knock on Tommy’s door, “Tommy for the love of god it’s almost eleven at night kiddo. You can keep playing but please just keep it down.”

“SORRY DADZA!”

“Good job dumbass,” Wilbur chuckled.

“Hey (y/n), how’re you?” Techno’s somewhat pointed voice interrupted them. “(Y/N)! Please tell Wilbur that it’s not cool to borrow my armor and ‘accidentally’ fall into a lava lake.”

“It was an accident I swear!” Wilbur’s slight chuckle told you otherwise. “Wilbur,” your croaky and wobbly voice scolded him quietly, “not cool.”

The voice channel went silent as you logged into your shared minecraft server. You immediately spawned in the main lobby at spawn that you built the last time you logged in. You got to work gathering wood for walls you were going to build around the city. You saw Techno’s character run to you and help you gather wood. 

“...You good, (y/n)?” Tommy’s voice took on an uncharacteristic level of gentleness and concern. 

“‘M fine.” 

After a while of silence, you heard keyboards start to click again. Gradually conversation started back up and everything felt lighthearted once more. Though, you only talked when you were prompted to. After gathering the correct amount of wood, you and Techno went back to your house so you could craft some slabs. However as you approached the crafting table, you passed your bed. Next to your bed was your pet dog, barking slightly and looking at you with it’s pixel eyes. 

You could feel tears well up in your eyes at the sight of the pixelated dog. With a lump forming in your throat you struggled to breathe through it, your breaths coming out shuttering. You made quick work of muting yourself on Discord and started sobbing, the white dog staring at you sitting on top of your minecraft bed. This wasn’t a panic attack, you knew that. But you still felt overcome by a massive wave of grief. 

After a bit, you saw Techno’s character pop in front of you and start hitting the air. In chat, you saw that he private messaged you ‘vc 2’

You clicked off the main voice chat and was immediately greeted by Techno’s gentle voice. “What’s goin on buddy?” He was only met with your sobs, “deep breaths.”

“I’m not having a panic attack.”

“Still, deep breaths are good. Follow me.” With that, you two worked on getting your breathing back to normal and your tears slowly stopped. The entire time he was giving you praise and gentle reassurances whenever you tried to apologize to him. By the time you stopped crying you felt almost completely drained. 

“You okay now?” You hummed in confirmation, too tired to say anything. “Thank you Tech, I-I’m sorry-”

“Stop apologizing for feeling emotions. They’re one hundred percent valid… Do you feel comfortable telling me what happened?”

“I…” You trailed off as you couldn’t bring yourself to say the words out loud. “You don’t have to tell me, ya know.” Technoblade gently reminded you.

“I’ll PM it to you.” With that, you PMed him on minecraft explaining that your dog died this morning. “Fuck, I’m so sorry (y/n). I’m sure he isn’t suffering anymore. Did- did they ever find out what caused the seizures?”

“No, but… he had tons of health issues that I’m glad he doesn’t have to deal with anymore.” 

“Do you wanna talk about the good times with him with Wil and Tommy? If you don’t want to we can just talk about them here.”

“Let’s rejoin the main voice channel.”

“Hey (y/n), how’re you doing?” Wilbur gently asked you. “I’m alright, do- do you guys know what happened?” They both said yes. Technoblade must’ve told them what was happening.

“(Y/n) come outside. We built something for you.” Tommy was uncharastically gentle. 

When you moved to go outside of your minecraft house and Wilbur and Tommy led you to an empty spot in the city you four were building, you stopped in your tracks. In front of you built in various types of stone was a dog statue. In front of it stood a sign that read ‘in loving memory of (dog name)’.

“We aren’t done with it, but we can finish it in a couple of hours,” Wilbur mumbled into the microphone. 

“No, it’s perfect as it is. I don’t know what to say guys…”

“You don’t have to say anything, just know that we’re here for you.” Tommy said, his minecraft character walking over to your own and hitting you. 

“Oi, don’t hit them!” Techno punched him back and that started an all out brawl between the two. It quickly ended when Techno pulled out his fully enchanted netherite sword named ‘Orphan Obliterator’. 

“Get fucked, nerd.” You could just tell Tommy was holding in screaming at his brother. “I’m not the nerd here, you’re the one that reads for fun.” Tommy retorted. You heard shuffling on Techno’s end and him walking away from his PC. You were about to ask what was happening before you heard Tommy silently scream in terror. “Oh fuck he’s coming!” You assumed that Tommy ran to lock his door. Not long after that you heard a knock, “I just wanna talk.”

“No! You-”

“I just wanna talk.”

“Let him talk, Tommy!”

“NO WILBUR.”

You heard Philza’s groggy muffled voice, “it is midnight on a Friday. I don’t care what happens or who fights who, just do it in your own rooms and do it quietly.” 

“Sorry Dad,” you heard Techno’s retreating steps before he returned to his chair. “You’re a douche, Technoblade.” 

“I just wanted to talk, Tommy.” At that, Techno started beating Tommy to death once more. Each time he would kill Tommy, he would give Tommy a small head start before he would find him again. While this was happening, Wilbur PMed you ‘wanna prank Tommy and Techno? I’m thinking we put chickens under their houses’.

You looked at his player and nodded. You and Wilbur got to work luring chickens into holes you dug around their bases and burying them so that they were close enough to hear, but deep enough for it to be mildly inconvenient finding them. After you two were done with that, you met at spawn again.

“Techno stop killing Tommy. We want to tell stories about (dog name).” You saw Techno’s character sprint to your group and Tommy’s come up from a hole in the ground. “I was just about to find him.”

“Thank you! God, I hate it when he does that.”

The rest of the night you four spent reminiscing on the funny things that (dog name) did over the years. At some points you even laughed along with them. After you told them that you wanted to take your senior pictures with him, Techno offered to edit him into your photos. You didn’t know when you passed out but when you woke up, you had a crick in your neck and your PC monitor was off. You could hear three sets of soft snoring on the other end of the call. You felt yourself drifting off to their gentle breathing and smiled slightly; with them, everything felt better. 

[speremint]

The haircut ordeal story I forgot to tell yesterday bc I was busy

So I went to get a haircut at this sweet little hole-in-the-wall Korean salon that was doing private, individual bookings. The hairdresser's name is Min, and she's v energetic and peppy, but English is obviously not her first language, which is fine, but I mention this because it's pertinent later.

Min was hilarious, very nice, tbh complimented me a lot, but I stg she thought I was a doctor JKLSDJF she thought I was some sort of 23 year old prodigy doctor, and so she was like "oh you're beautiful, smart, and a doctor!!" and I was like no... I'm an artist actually, and she was like "oh... well at least you're beautiful"

thank you, I guess, LOL

I mentioned during the haircut that I was visiting my partner afterwards, and so throughout the haircut she was giving me relationship advice and p much was like "if he doesn't respect you, break up with him because you can do way better!!" And when she had finished my haircut, it was very sweet, bc I was super excited bc it looks great, and she was like "just say 'thank you, mom!'" and I nearly cried bc wow, she's so sweet...

But, and here's where it gets wild.

Come time to pay, her machine is broken. So after letting her try to reset it, I finally googled the error message, and saw the OS was out of date... so I offered to call the company for her because old people with technology is bad enough, but a language barrier for a machine her husband set up in her stead is even worse.

When I tried to talk to her husband to get the email address the device was registered under, he straight up fucking ask if I was "the help", so I straight up wanted to kill him after that, but anyway, I put the phone down and managed to get the tech support woman to surpass the email bc I explained I was a customer, which she found super sweet, so she was very accommodating.

In short, I spent 2 hours at this hairdresser trying to fix her damn PAX machine because her idiot husband fucking set up the wrong IP address/ports, and then, after ALL of that, it was still broken because he registered it incorrectly.

Which meant I had to walk to the nearest ATM to get cash, to of which some creeps in trucks honked at me, and I got blisters bc I was wearing heels.

The entire time she was apologizing and just v obviously nervous and embarrassed, and I'm like fam it's totally fine, it's no worries at all... and when I was leaving she literally dumped like half of her candy bowl in my pockets 

jdskfjek I don't even eat candy, really... I just accepted it bc she felt so bad...

So I finally get to my (now ex) partner's house, and I was relaying this story to him, and he goes "Wait did you visit Min's? I go there! ...Wait she told you to break up with me??" (it turns out she was absolutely right)

TL;DR: my first visit to this private salon i tried to help fix her card machine for over an hour after she gave me relationship advice that was basically just “break up with him, you can do better”, and via phone with her husband/walking to an ATM, experienced random-ass microaggressions and then, finally arriving at my (now ex) partner’s apartment, found out he also goes to the same hairstylist and is a regular, so she was basically telling me to break up with him sdjfkle

[princess-pill-enjoyer]

Ended up taking all the spare pills I had in my bag. I took 200 before I left for the uh "looseness" effect of it. Which worked pretty well. Talking and joking around wasn't too too hard. But the extra 450 I took throughout the event was purely for the high. Not even gonna front

I got to drink a bit with my uh god grandma. Originally I was popping more to heighten the diluted ass liquor but after a while I just gave up on drinking snd just popped em as I thought about it. I don't get why I don't ever get that much of an effect from alcohol actually. Maybe I do but with me being used to being fucked off dph I don't notice the effects as much. Or cause the adults seem to like light light buzzes over being drunk so it wasn't that strong anyway. Tho.. I don't really drink so I'd figure I'd be an ultra lightweight. I dunno lol

It was nice to see everyone after all this time. It's kinda odd to see some of em for the first time in like.. 10 years? Something like that. I don't see my mom's side of the family often at all so my mental image of them versus what they actually look like now was a little off. Twas good to get an updated look you know?

Tho since I'm not really close with them they were bringing up my old uni not knowing I dropped out like half a year ago now. It made me feel like shit ngl. If I didn't come there with someone I would've either dipped early to cry or just run away in general. I just like.. I dunno. I know if they knew me and everything going on they'd see me as a fucking loser and I can't even blame them. I feel so gross just thinking about all that.

Stressing my god grandma out was the only reason I didn't. She was my ride so me not coming back would make her go nuts tryna find me/feel like shit for not keeping an eye on me. I didn't want to put that on her. So I ended up just taking dose after dose tryna make it harder to think.

Only semi worked as for one, I was only taking 100/150 extra at a time and while I did the majority of that before like 3-4ish it was still semi spaced out + around other people mode kicked in kicked in which made me subconsciously hide and brush off the high anyway. Actually the only one that semi fucked me up was the final 100 I had left that I took around 7. I was already teary-eyed thinking about what R said and I just had multiple family members chatting about my college shit. I would've just cried and taken extra care to wipe my eyes frequently buut I didn't trust myself to do it without getting too caught up and sobbing so I took the 100 as a distraction. It worked out pretty alr I was able to not cry at all and we dipped soon after

As for now I just woke back up from a nap. I wasn't really that tired but the high from all the pills was still there so I just went to sleep instead of building onto it. I think I was sleep for a good 4 hours so it was lowkey a full night's rest. Probably won't be going back to bed for a while..

Plus, lowkey feel like I'm gonna puke. My stomach started to burn again and I'm sure it's from the alcohol-benadryl concoction it had to put up with today. I figure I might as well let that settle first as to not puke it up and waste more pills

I don't know what I want to do anymore. On one hand I know I'm going to have to cry and beg my mom to let me borrow money from her. I don't want to but I know if I let that uni debt shit fester they'd be pissed once they found out. It's gonna be hard to cry in front of her. I know if I asked in my normal/casual tone she'd look at me worse though. I'll have to figure that out. Past that, I don't know what'll be my next move. All I want to do is od on this shit and finally be free. Tho, ig that's a bit dire. I think everyone would be mad at me throwing in the towel this early on. But it's all I want atp. I'm tired of feeling like this and I don't care enough to make some miraculous comeback. I'm over it atp

[amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines]

Archie//sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart

Request: Hey agian lol sorry I was also wondering if you could do 2 archie andrew imagines where the reader gets pregnant and tells archie in a cute way, skip to where they find out the gender, then the birth and Archie makes a promise to reader and their baby and proposes to the reader also archie does skin to skin contact 

hey! so, this was fun to write! i hope you like! there’s a lot of baby themed things being posted right now, i must have had an influx of baby requests. also, title is a winnie the pooh quote, so credit to that adorable yellow bear i guess. he really has way with words doesn’t he? 

Andrew’s construction is in popular demand these days, the legacy of Fred Andrews has travelled far and wide through the surrounding towns of Riverdale, and Archie feels like he hasn’t stopped in the last month. He goes to work before you wake up, comes home when it’s dark, eats, showers and sleeps. 

Today is no different, and as he drags his feet up the steps to your apartment, keys jingling in his hands as he goes over what he has left to do on the build he’s currently doing, his eyes get heavier with each step. 

He expects you to be waiting by the door, or pottering about in the kitchen when he walks through the front door, but there’s no one there. The lights are switched off, causing a frown to form on his face. 

The first thing he feels is panic, but then he hears you coming out of the bathroom, a bright smile on your face as you near him and he feels himself relax. 

“Hey babe.” You greet and wrap your arms around his neck. He kisses you slowly and you feel a blush creep up your cheeks. “How has your day been?” You ask and grab his coat from him. 

“It was alright. We’re almost finished the house, hopefully it’ll be done in the next few days, so maybe next weekend we can get away somewhere.” He replies making you grin. “Right now though, I need a shower.” He sighs and untangles himself from you, cringing when he realizes just how bad he needs one.

“Wait!” You grab his hand and he looks at you confused. “I need to give you something first.” You add and pull him into the small dining room. Candles line the room, making him furrow his eyebrows as he looks at you. “Okay, close your eyes.” You tell him and he sends you a look before reluctantly closing his eyes. 

You take a deep breath, feeling your heartbeat in your throat as you pick up the small box hidden on one of the chairs. 

“Hold your hands out.” You instruct and he does, slightly apprehensive of what you’re going to do. 

“If this is a spider I swear to God, Y/n.” He teases making you giggle. 

“It’s not I promise. Just give me your hands.” You say and he shifts uncomfortably, but holds his hands out anyway. “Okay.” You place the box in his hands and he squeezes it. “Open them!” 

His eyes snap open and he looks down at the small white box. He looks between it and you before pulling the lid off. A small bear stares back at him and for a moment he’s confused as to why you’ve given him his childhood Winnie the Pooh bear to him as a present. But then he notices what he’s holding and his eyes widen. 

“Holy shit.” He whispers and picks the white stick up. “Are you?” He squints while reading the small screen. “positive...are you pregnant?” Tears blur his vision but he can just make out you nodding and he grins at you. 

“Don’t worry, I cleaned the test before I put it in the bo-” A squeal leaves your lips as he picks you up and spins you around. Tears roll down his cheeks while he laughs loudly. 

“I love you so fucking much.” He mumbles against your lips. You run your fingers through his hair, and his eyes flutter closed. 

“I love you too.” You reply and pull him in for another kiss. 

---

“Go ahead.” The bell above the door rings, alerting the few people sitting in Pop’s of your arrival. Archie presses a kiss to your head and squeezes your hand before ordering. 

You take a quick glance around, trying to find an empty booth for the two of you to sit and celebrate in, but when your eyes land on a certain blonde and beanie clad couple, your eyes light up and all thoughts of private moment are gone. 

“What are you guys doing back?” You ask, pleasantly surprised and Betty and Jughead stop their conversation. Your smiles mirror each other as they stand up to hug you, and you feel tears spring to your eyes. “Sorry guys.” You wipe at them and Betty looks at you concerned. “It’s the hormones. Although, I am really happy that you’re back.” You send them a watery smile and they look at you sympathetically. 

“Here.” Jughead hands you a napkin and you take it gratefully. 

“Thanks.” You slide into the seat opposite them, resting a gentle hand on the top of your bump. 

“We’re just visiting our parents.” Betty explains. “My mom’s been on the phone every single day for the past two weeks so I thought I’d come down for the weekend so she’ll leave us alone for a bit.” She explains and you roll your eyes. 

“I see she still isn’t quite over the two of you moving.” 

“You’re telling me.” She sips her milkshake while huffing. 

“It’s not like we moved half way across the country. We’re an hour and a half drive.” Jughead adds through a mouthful of food and you pull a face. 

“Jughead, Betty!” Archie grins while placing your drinks down on the table. “What are you doing back.” 

“Alice.” The three of you reply and he shakes his head, a small laugh escaping his lips. 

“Oh.” 

“Yeah.” Betty nods. “Anyway, how are you guys? What have you been up to?” She asks and you and Archie share a look. He places a hand on your bump and you give it a squeeze. 

“We went to the doctors today for a scan.” Archie starts and a soft smile twitches at your lips. 

“Oh you’re twenty weeks now!” Betty squeals making Jughead jump slightly as she leans forward. “Do you know what you’re having?” 

“Nope.” You shake your head and she slumps in her seat. “The doctor wrote it down but we haven’t looked at it yet.” You add and she picks her head up, her eyebrow raises as she glances between you and the bag sat beside you. 

“Nope!” Archie picks it up before she has the chance to grab it and she sits back down with a loud huff.

“Meanie. I think as the auntie and uncle of your baby, we have a right to know what it is.” She crosses her arms and you roll your eyes at her. 

You may have all grown up, moved away and gotten actual lives. But whenever your back together in Riverdale, you all revert back to teenagers winding each other and everyone else up. 

“Hey babe?” Archie interrupts yours and Betty’s small argument and you send her a glare before facing your boyfriend. “Where’s the envelope?” 

“What?!” Your eyes widen and you grab the bag from him. Jughead and Betty lean over the table and watch you empty your bag. “No, no, no.” You mumble and shake the worn leather. 

“It’s fine.” Archie tries to calm you down. “Isn’t it fine guys.” 

“Yes.” Jughead nods. 

“Totally fine.” Betty adds and searches through the pile of things on the table. “It’s got to be here somewhere.” 

“Hey, do any of you guys know why somebody would just have the world ‘girl’ in an envelope?” Reggie drags a chair up to your table and everyone goes silent. “Because, even I know that’s weird.” He continues and drops the paper on the table.

Black curly writing faces the four of you and you all stare down in shock, it takes a few minutes before Archie breaks the silence. A shocked laugh escapes his lips and he looks at you, tears forming in his eyes. 

“We’re having a girl?” He says and you nod. 

“Yeah.” You laugh. “I suppose we are.” He cuts you off with a kiss and Betty and Jughead share a look, clinking their glasses together. 

---

“Y/n. I have loved you since we were 16. I love how smart you are, and how you’re always the funniest person in the room. Your smile is just my favourite thing to look at, it makes me smile just thinking about it. You’ve made me a better man, and now a father, so I would like to make you my wife. Y/n Y/l/n, will you marry m-OW!”

“Are you seriously asking me to marry you while I’m giving birth?” You seethe and squeeze his hand. 

“I thought it was romantic.” He argues and pulls his fingers from your grip. He’s about to continue when you send him a glare that quickly shuts him up, maybe even forever. 

“Birth is not romantic. It is the furthest thing from romantic and when I’ve finished this I swear I’m going to tear your head from your shoulders, shove it in the hole and then see how you like pushing something of that size out of you.” His eyes widen at your threat and he gulps a little. 

The midwives and doctor surrounding you stifle their laughs at your words, all of them excited to tell their co-workers the newest insult to go on their wall of insults that’s been hurled at partners. 

“Sorry.” He mumbles and rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. “You’re doing amazing babe.” He strokes the top of your head and you groan loudly as another contraction hits. 

“That’s it Y/n, keep pushing. Well done.” The midwife talks you through it and you grit your teeth as you push again. 

“Why do you have your boobs out?” You ask through you’re panting and Archie looks down at his bare chest. 

“The midwife said it would help bonding.” He shrugs and you stare at him. 

“With who? The midwife?” 

“No.” He shakes his head. “The baby.” You’re about to argue when another contraction cuts you off and Archie’s bonding is the least of your problems. 

“Fuck!” You curse and Archie grimaces at the noises you’re making. If he could swap places with you, he would in an instant. He hates seeing you in pain, even if you just get a paper cut, so this is killing him, even if he does know after it’ll be worth it. 

With a few more pushes and lot more curses, you finally give birth to a 7lb baby, born at 8:17am with bright brown eyes and head full of blonde hair. 

“Do you think she’ll turn ginger?” You ask through sobs as she’s carefully handed to you. 

“I hope so.” Archie cries. “Although, I don’t really care. I’ll love her no matter what.” He adds and wipes the tears from his eyes. 

“Archie?” You ask and he looks at you, both of your eyes full of love and awe. “I will marry you.” You say, a tired smile twitching at your lips while your head falls onto his shoulder, pressing a soft kiss to it. “Would you like to hold her?” You ask and he nods eagerly. 

“I’m always going to be here for you and you’re mom...I promise.” He starts, and walks over to the window looking over the car park and the rest of Riverdale. “You are the most loved thing in this world and I am already so proud of you. I love you.” Archie whispers, the chatter from the nursers and the curses from you all fade away as he stares down at her. Her wide eyes look back at him, they pierce through him and stare straight at his soul. “Hi, Winifred, welcome to the world.” 

✨tagged ✨

 @moxleybabe

[bitchiha]

i need some fluff huhu. can i have naruto with mom reader hc or imagines? thank u 😍

A/N: ive never done anything like this before but I like this idea 10/10

Also special credit / mention to @softnaruto because we talked about some of these ideas but w Iruka not a mother figure lol

✎ Being Narutos Mother Figure *sparkles but they’re on fire bc this is chaotic*

Overall, before I get into the details, I’d say this is a very chaotic task lol. You’re probably half dead after dealing w his ass for so long, but seeing this boy that you thought of as your own son grow up before your eyes is so rewarding. It’s great, so wholesome 100/10.

You and Iruka definitely co-parent

Naruto would be constantly protecting you from Jiraiya. Like he doesn’t want the man near you. Runs over to you whenever Jiraiya is nearby and starts screaming “Missus Y/N, run! Pervy Sage is here, I’m doing you a favour, believe it!” No but in all seriousness, take Narutos advice because I know Pervy Sage is tryna hit it.

You end up having to talk to Jiraiya eventually though because you need to know what’s going on with Naruto and the Akatsuki and what you can do to help. Naruto will watch over the interactions like a hawk. Will whip a chopstick at Jiraiya if he tries anything on you, “Back it up pervy Sage! I said three meters apart, there’s no excuse!” So you’d have to meet eachother in secret because you won’t be able to discuss much when the blondies around.

Also, the amount of times you’ve chased his ass around the village after he got into some major trouble is too many times to count. He’s running as fast as he can away from you because he knows you’re gonna whoop his ass lol. Probably even uses his shadow clones, but you know better than to fall for those stupid tricks. No but fr, it’s a really good workout tbh you probably ran a marathon.

You treat him to ramen whenever he comes back from a mission. Sometimes Iruka comes along as well and you both alternate who pays the bill. Naruto always challenges you to a ramen eating competition. Luckily Iruka is there to hold you two back because he knows neither of you are financially stable enough to endure that damage to your wallets.

Literally everyone; Konoha 11, kakashi, iruka, Jiraiya, Tsunade, etc... always threaten Naruto by saying that they’ll tell y/n he’s not cooperating. It works like a charm everytime. There’s no way he wants to hear you lecture him for a good 2 hours. He’d rather get rasenganed into the face than listen to your horrible attempts at being wise.

You always ruffle Narutos hair when you see him. It’s like your signature sign of affection. You also call him “kid” all the time or “youngster” even though you’re like the same age as Kakashi and therefore not old yourself.

He calls you miss. He sometimes calls you Aunty y/n. Refuses to just call you y/n because he wants to be respectful, he looks up to you as a figure of guidance no matter how much he’ll deny it. So no matter how many times you tell him not to call you miss, he will.

Lots of walks! Like you’ll wait for him with Iruka at the village gate when Narutos supposed to return from a mission. It’s like parents picking up their kid from a field trip aweeee. You’ll pack some snacks for the three of you and he fills you in on his missions. He’ll always be like, “Awe no way! Thanks Missus Y/N. You’re the best!” When you give him all the food you packed.

He always comes to you for advice or to rant to you about Sasuke, Sai, Sakura and literally all the other Konoha 11. Lol, but he will rant about you to Iruka and Jiraiya all the time, little does he know you do the same.

Would purposely set you into mama bear mode on Sai for his own amusement. Like he just gets a kick out of watching you confront Sai about calling Naruto some absurd obscenity and watch poor Sai just stand there like: (°_°) lol what do I do? Naruto is snickering behind a tree because he just made that all up. Yamato probably has to intervene when he sees it. Will have to woodstyle justu you when he realizes you’re in mama bear mode.

Hes such a troublesome rat. You love him though. He’s your troublesome rat-son.

Naruto is used to you being hot headed like Tsunade when he gets into trouble, but if you ever take the disappointed route instead, he will cry lol. Like he hates that you’re actually disappointed with him, he didn’t mean to trick you into yelling at Sai, please forgive him.

All celebrations are done with Kakashi, Iruka, Naruto and yourself. Since you all don’t really have any real family to celebrate with, you’ve made your own. It’s so chaotic tho lol.

These events are always ‘surprises for Naruto’ so the cooking is up to you and Kakashi, but Kakashi is so fast at cooking he doesn’t even let you do anything. You have to physically stop him so you could do some of the work. Meanwhile Iruka sets up decorations for the event and he’s probably singing festive songs LOOL. Plus he can’t sing so it’s an extra headache ontop of you yelling at Kakashi to let you do some work.

Then you all surprise Naruto with your half burnt food (while you were fighting the food most definitely lit on fire) and extremely cheesy decorations. Oddly Iruka even decorated the floor. Like wtf. Anyways, Naruto doesn’t really care about how bad it actually was, he was just happy to have people around him that cared enough to invite him to a celebration.

The food is inedible so you go to Ichirakus instead and somehow persuade Iruka into paying for all four of you <3 this happens every holiday so he ends up just saving his money in preparation for it.

Naruto tries to be a matchmaker for you LMFAO. He tries to get you and Iruka together which ends so awkwardly omg, then he’ll try and get you and kakashi together which was even more awkward and DONT get me started on Yamato omg.. He was so nervous he just stared at you the whole time like a googley eyed tree frog or something. Each time you catch onto Naruros little Cupid schemes you tell him to buzz off and that you’re not interested, but he doesn’t listen.

Your other holiday celebrations may be badly executed, but you actually host the best birthdays for him!! You pair up with Tsunade, Shizune, Kakashi, Iruka and Sakura to throw him really memorable birthdays. They may not make up for all the ones he missed celebrations for already, but you do your best to make these extra memorable.

At the end of the night after every birthday party, you walk him home and pat his shoulder sadly talking about how he’s growing up so fast. You probably end up crying because you're sad the little doofus is maturing somewhat. You tell him that and he laughs. Once you’re at his apartment door he’ll grin tiredly and give you a big hug. “Thanks again, aunty y/n.” You probably cry again on the way home bc he actually hugged you. That’s so sentimental omg. That is roughly about what happens every single birthday.

For your birthdays he treats you to ramen and gets you some weird kitchen gadget or something. Figures you’re an adult and they probably need these things. You don't, but you appreciate the gift anyway. 

He buys you flowers every Mother’s Day. It makes you so emotional. You definitely cry. “Awe missus y/n! Not again. You’re so emotional.” He probably starts crying too though lol.

It breaks his heart to see you cry omg. Poor baby is like a lost puppy when you cry. Like not you’re over exaggerated crying, but your said painful crying. Once, after hearing some distressing news about the Akatsuki, you just break down. Naruto has become a son to you after all and you want to protect him so badly, but how can you do that when you’re up against powerful rouge ninjas? You cried in front of him for the when you two were having your weekly dinners at your place, all the sudden you just burst out crying and it hurt him so much because he knew it was because you were so worried about him.

Honestly, he probably ruffles your hair —like you do to him — in attempt to cheer you up. “It’s okay, Aunty y/n. I’ll take care of it, everything will be okay, believe it!”

Oh yah also, speaking of weekly dinners! You guys definitely get together at least once a month or if it’s a good time, once a week to have dinner. We all know Naruto only survives on ramen, so you try and cook him healthy food, but my god he resists so hard. Then you give him that warning look and he chows down that salad so fast lol.

It would be 10/10 he's a great kid

[thatpinkbetch]

Bkdk Fic Rec

I’ve been inspired to write a fic rec! This one goes out to you @lonely-rabbit

At like, the end of 2018 and the beginning of 2019 I stayed up until 4am every night reading fics, and because I’m such a loser, I made a word doc to keep track of all of them so I wouldn’t forget them.... I tried organizing it by length but it got messy cause I’m ridiculous and cluttered, so sorry! (I’ll save my own for the end alskdjflsdkfj gotta self promote you know). This is going to get...really long, so I’ll put it under a read more! Also, just a heads up, these are all on ao3, in case that’s important to anyone!

Disclaimer: Any fics with mature or explicit content I will add a bolded warning for, even if it’s only a little bit. Normally most fics will be tagged as such, but some fics that are rated as teen I’ve found to be more suggestive than some of those rated as mature, so I will try to point it out where it feels necessary, for anyone who wishes to avoid it.

Fics under 1k:

Illuminate by TheQueen (269 words)

Summary: Bakugou watches the first firework launch and fights to keep his face neutral

Very short, plot is about a case of amnesia, also very cute and well written for that length! Not angsty at all imo

sweaty hands holding secrets - shounentwink (563 words)

Summary: Someone said Midoriya holds secrets in his hair.

It’s not true: He holds it tightly in his hands. Bakugou’s seen it.

I really like this writer! You’ll see quite a bit of them in this post alkdsjfalskdjf

Fics 1k - 10k:

Many sunflowers later - Jeka (2395 words)

Summary: Scholar Midoriya Izuku comes back to the person he left behind after his journey through the kingdom, the mighty dragon clan leader Bakugou Katsuki.

Day 1 of Twin Stars Week 2020: Fantasy AU.

First of all, fantasy au!!! Second of all, jeka!!! (I need to read more of your stuff!!) Anyways, so cute, such lovely, pretty writing, wonderful story telling, and they’re so in love TT_TT

Boom Badoom Boom - warschach (3429 words)

Summary: Izuku's working the kissing booth at the school fair, it just so happens Katsuki has been crushing on him since the first grade.

“Did you—“ Izuku parted his mouth with no sound leaving it, “Did you pay?”

“Yea.”

“For a kiss?”

This one’s a little silly but I love it still. It’s got a “kids in the 80′s over summer vacation” vibe, I think. I love warschach! I should read more of their writing... They have SUCH good bakudeku content! *It’s rated teen but there’s some suggestive content, just a heads up!

Hopeless Ramen-tic - lalazee (7155 words)

Summary:  Midoriya is a cute guy who works at a ramen stall and Bakugou is thirsty as hell, but has to hide it by being an asshat. Another love story.

Ah, so good TT_TT so much sass, such good plot development and story telling for a simple concept *It’s rated as teen but again, it can be suggestive at times!

I’ll share this with you, so leave it behind - yabakuboi (3508 words)

Suammry: For the sake of the story, All Might is never in need of a successor, and, when Izuku saves Katsuki from the sludge monster, encourages young Midoriya down a different path. Thus, Katsuki and Izuku part ways after junior high, as Katsuki enters U.A. and the Midoriyas move overseas. It’s later that Katsuki realizes that there’s something missing, that he drove that something away.

Years after, Katsuki finds him in the last place he looks, in the cereal aisle at the local grocery store of their childhood neighborhood.

So soft, so sweet, so good if you just want to curl up in a comfy blanket and drink hot cocoa and feel warm and cozy and a little in love

The Secret Deku Box - yabakuboi (2241 words)

Summary: “Y’know, Bakugou never, ever talks about girls,” Kaminari says, his voice thoughtful.

“And I wonder why that is.” Ashido rolls her eyes.

“I’m just curious!” Kaminari whines. Kirishima drags the box out, unlabeled and unassuming, the lid not even fully clasped over the edges. “The guy has to— Whoa, what’s that?”

Kirishima realizes a little belatedly that this is a serious breach of privacy, and Bakugou will actually murder all of them. “Nothing!” he cries, attempting to shove it back under the bed, but Ashido snatches it away.

“Please be his porn stash!” Kaminari whispers as she whips the lid off.

Cute, funny, in canon, in character, and a must read I would say! 

daisy bunches and heather branches - halcyonwhispers (5862 words)

Summary:  izuku falls in love with the foul-mouthed tattoo artist next door.

Not another flower/tattoo shop au.... aldskjflaskdjfd Okay but punk!Bakugou is ALWAYS a smart move imo

the best part of me (is the worst I can give) - halcyonwhispers (5668)

Summary: Whole sentences usually make up people’s Words, but Katsuki got stuck with a name instead.

Izuku’s name.

I am such a sucker for soulmate aus when it comes to these boys TT_TT *There is some mature content, just a heads up!

Hard to Say - halcyonwhispers (8390 words)

Summary: Izuku is a Halfling, born after his faerie father spirited away his mom and then left her behind. Never quite fitting in with the humans or any of the supernatural beings in his small town, Izuku hoped that going to a diverse college in the big city will help him finally make friends.

Katsuki’s family has been powerful witches for generations, and he’s no different. Talented and a proclaimed genius to boot, he knew he shouldn’t waste his time on this dumbass (disgustingly cute) half-blood.

Or,

two idiots fall in love and don’t get that the other’s awkward cues are just a result of romantic tension.

I am ALSO a sucker for fantasy/mythical creatures au and I LOVED this one - Bakugou absolutely unable to handle how cute Midoriya is? Perfection - but it’s unfinished, and I don’t think it ever will be continued, unfortunately TT_TT

lots to unpack (throw away the whole suitcase) - shounentwink (4315 words)

Summary: “How’d you know?” Midoriya asks.

There’s a hunch to his shoulders that wasn’t there three hours ago. Freckled shoulders are kissed sunburnt and red: he looks like someone ran him over and left him like roadkill in the sunlight. Bakugou’s working with insurance today, but he could see the sparks of green lightning even from his elevated position in their shared agency. Midoriya’s holding his thumb, cracking it over and over — it looks like he’s rubbed it raw.

“Dunno,” Bakugou says. “Maybe you’re just easy to read, nerd.”

I love this one so much, it was one of the first ones I read, it’s so good, and it’s another that really affected how I view their relationship! Idk this one just hit for me

hang the moon from us (it’s a no from me) - shounentwink (1200 words)

Summary: Midoriya’s gonna get sick of Bakugou one of these days, and then the whole ruse will be over, and the balance of power will tilt beyond salvation, but that day isn’t today and it looks like Bakugou knows it.

What an asshole.

Once again, I’m a sucker for the fantasy au... But even more, the diction, the details, the imagery...it’s absolutely all stunning here. I wish I could write this pretty

In Which Bakugou Finds His One Tru Luv - Erina (5862 words) This is the first one of a series called The Misadventures of Explodo-kill Agency!

Summary:  Welcome to the Explodo-kill agency! We can destroy your buildings, crash your cars, and help you solve one of the seven mysteries in life: who is Bakugou Katsuki's mysterious boyfriend?!

I’ll admit I’ve only read the first three but by god they are the funniest fics I’ve ever read in my life. I see that Erina has added more since the last time I checked it out! Tbh I was only interested in reading the purely bakudeku ones... (My favorite was the second one!! SO funny and cute!)

i still do - raeryn (9646 words)

Summary:  He’s losing him to pieces, but Izuku still tries to make them count. In which a battle leaves Bakugou Katsuki with amnesia, and Izuku finds himself picking up the pieces.

So, this one makes me cry. TT_TT

One Thing Straight - winningshot (9899 words)

Summary: They totally aren't.

Hints of their relationship is found in all of their friends’ social media accounts, but majority of their fans still think that Katsuki and Izuku are in relationships with anybody but each other.

It was amusing up until it became sad.

Lmao it’s a little salty but I guess I can be too. This is a social media fic! There’s multiple ships in this one, too

A Demolition Boy & his Cryptid BF - kewltie (8472 words)

Summary: Bakugou of the Demolition Squad is famous for running one of the most popular Youtube channels on the web that regularly blow shit up and jumped off a perfectly good building for shit and giggles. He's also famous for his Cryptid BF™, never appearing on camera except for a few bodyshots and all information on him is kept locked up tighter than Fort Knox, therefore drawing all sort of attention and curiosity toward his mysterious boyfriend.

Deku from Deku Explains is a hopeless chatterbox who is known for uploading 20-30 minutes video that talked about his favorite shows and comics and have one of the most devoted following on Youtube. He also can't seem to shut up about his boyfriend Kacchan, who regularly make his presence on the channel as a disembodied voice.

They should theoretically have nothing in common except a shared platform to host their content and an army of fans with an endless curiosity and devotion to their Youtubers. Vidcon is where we lay our scene and the internet is about to get a rude wake up call.

Okay kewltie is SO GOOD and very creative! The formatting is phenomenal, it’s like you’re actually experiencing a social media melt down in real time lol

be my good luck charm - writedeku (6785 words)

Summary: See, the thing is, Midoriya Izuku had been born with a curse. It’s not a curse that’s particularly visible. He doesn’t have horns, or a tortured face, and it’s not the kind of silly curse like a friend of his had way down south in Diagnor, wherein the girl had been born without the ability to say the word duck. Midoriya Izuku is just extremely unlucky.

(Or the AU in which Izuku's the world's unluckiest travelling merchant, and Katsuki is someone who may be able to help him. For a price, that is.)

Oh I adore this one! It’s so cute and such a good narrative! Nice and warm, and Bakugou trying his damnedest to be suave, and it somehow working because Midoriya is just as flustered. *Another one rated as teen but some suggestive content.

Smells Like Victory - majjale (2377 words)

Summary: Bakugou takes two steps into the room and stops, clapping a hand over his nose. “Ugh, what stinks like Deku in here?”

"Good afternoon, Bakugou. That would be the amortentia."

I must admit, not a fan of HP, but majjale...TT_TT majjale writes these two boys so well. This one is really, really good!

Cherish Me - Justaperson1718 (2376 words)

Summary: “What?”

Izuku looked back down at his menu and flipped the page, a small smile on his face. “Nothing.”

Katsuki glared at Izuku from across the table. “If it was nothing then you wouldn’t be staring at me.”

“It’s just a little funny watching you try to look your best for our date when you always look great anyway,” Izuku explained. He wouldn’t look up from his menu while he spoke, but his words remained ingrained with confidence nevertheless. He considered what he was saying to be fact, and nothing else. “Even when you’re not trying in front of the cameras, it’s still hard to take my eyes off of you.”

This is a sequel to a fic that’ll be in the next section, because it’s longer, called Manage Me. Please read that one first before this one! (Not part of a series, but they’re the same story line)

Fascinating - Justaperson1718 (1556 words)

Summary: “I’m not staring at you,” Izuku replied, his eyes focused intently on Katsuki. He’s still wearing his pajamas, sitting on his knees in their shared bed. He was awake moments before Katsuki, and waited eagerly for the other to awake.

Katsuki glanced over his shoulder after his shirt was on and glared. “You’re fucking staring at me right now.”

Izuku shook his head, humming his disapproval quietly. “I’m watching you.”

“That’s the same damn thing,” Katsuki said while searching for a pair of pants in the dresser. “Your eyes are fixated on me like I’m your life’s fucking goal or some shit.”

“I just like watching you get dressed.” Izuku tilted his head to the side and smiled softly at Katsuki’s confused stare. “I know, it’s weird. But I like it.”

*There is a little bit of implied mature content, but overall, it’s just so sweet and intimate, and I just simply adore this one.

in a place once filled with gold - dorenamryn (9226 words)

Summary: It felt strange to remember such details, for they were things a friend should know, and as far as Katsuki was concerned, he and Deku hadn’t been friends in a very, very long time. He could admit, with reluctance, that they were on the path there, now, even though they would never make it. Katsuki would die before they could get the chance.

or: There is a garden growing in Katsuki’s lungs, and he is helpless to stop it.

“Hanahaki disease” okay, I can explain myself. Okay, I can’t. In any case, you got angst with a happy ending if that’s what you’re into!

Kaleidoscope - DPRenFTW (5141 words)

Summary: Izuku is a witch. He just needs to find his familiar. Enter a boy that is a wolf, and a wolf that is a boy - with wild red eyes and sharp smiles.

And Izuku thinks:

"Oh, it's him."

Just as beautiful and fascinating as the name implies! I seriously recommend for the beautiful writing, the gorgeous world, the mythical creatures au, and the lovely bakudeku romance!

Learning Curve - sensiblysilly (4222 words)

Summary: Deku and Katsuki’s first kiss goes rather differently than planned.

And Katsuki’s quickly learning that relationships can be unpredictable - especially when taking into account the variable that is Midoriya Izuku.

This really is just a careful handling of a teenage romance where perhaps one of them may have shit they’re still working through. It’s really sweet, and a careful study at boundaries and the building of a relationship. I actually stumbled across this while looking for another with the same name and ended up pleasantly surprised. Kacchan can has a little validation, as a treat.

4/20 is a national holiday - Ereri_Garbage (

Summary: Izuku is a drug dealer that doesn't really accept the fact he's a drug dealer, Katsuki is hot as hell as shouldn't be allowed a facebook.

Happy (Late) birthday Katsuki and happy (late) 4/20. I actually half assed an edit on this one so it took longer to post than I thought it would.

Uummmm lmao yes I have a sense of humor. ;ALDSKJFLSKDJF Okay, I say that, but this is not a crack fic, it’s a good story that I enjoy with good writing, and *it has mature, content, obviously for multiple reasons here. It’s rated as mature but there are borderline explicit moments imo. It’s a fun fic and funny, too! And, ngl, it really does remind me of college... But forget about me, the bakudeku is wonderful too of course :)

Drinking Watermelon - warschach (8906 words)

Summary: For whatever reason, maybe divine fate, Izuku turned and looked over his shoulder and waved to them.

Katsuki’s heart full on stopped right then, and his fingers forgot their duty on the rails, and his body neglected its job to keep Katsuki balanced.

Izuku’s summer sweet smile fell into concern as Katsuki went airborne and cracked his skull on the porch.

or Katsuki works as a camp counselor, and Izuku is a boy made of summer heat and sunlight.

Love it when people have Bakugou as absolutely enamored with Midoriya; it’s so good and true. Anyways this one makes me like summer camp story lines. It’s funny and also cute and great writing! *It’s got explicit content, just a heads up. Warschach stories just have this youthful 80′s vibe, I don’t know how else to explain it.

there are listed buildings - semiautomatichearts (3309)

Summary: Katsuki first sees colors bloom when he is only three years old. It is timid Izuku, hiding behind the cover of his mother's leg who looks upon him with wide eyes, and Katsuki's world explodes in shades of greens and pinks and blues, and he is so startled, he begins to cry.

His life is then on defined in color, in shades his peers can't see, by the forlorn, timid stare in Izuku's eyes that always lets off more than he is willing to tell. There is a schism driven between himself and his fated other, and Katsuki strives to be better than fate, better than what is defined for him. He is more than the written pages of a book, to be cracked open and read by the gods.

He wonders if it is possible for colors to bloom for someone who will never love you back.

Ah...soulmates :) So interesting how bakudeku fits into soulmate aus like this one when they’ve known each other as kids! And when they’ve had this complex push and pull thing going on all their lives! The writing is beautiful, and so is the story!

Promise Ring - bkdkwritingsdump (3579)

Summary:  The midwest in the 1950′s is no place for boys who like kissing boys: something Izuku and Katsuki know all too well growing up there. However, the undeniable bond between the nervous science geek and the aloof delinquent will still find a way to blossom in such a desert.

Cute, sweet, makes my gay heart ache. Longing not just for the one you love, but just to feel right loving them. Very pretty story line, lovely story telling!

Fics 10k - 30k:

Fishy - warschach (19417 words)

Summary: Izuku’s convinced his hot co-worker/neighbor, Katsuki, is a mermaid-or merman- you gotta consider genders even with mythical creatures- and plans to prove it.

(or this is kinda like the show ‘Monster Quest’, except Izuku actually finds said monster, falls in love, and have sexy times.)

Another warschach! I love this one, I love how they write bakudeku, particularly as college students, their stories (at least, the ones that I’ve read) always feel so warm, like a summer’s day, but not a lazy one, one that’s playful? If that makes sense? *This one is explicit, another heads up!

Manage Me - Justaperson1718 (10756 words)

Summary: Izuku caught himself moving forward, his head tilted somewhat to the side, and his eyes shot wide open. His gaze met Katsuki’s half-lidded eyes now that he was no longer in a dreamlike state, and seeing the way Katsuki was looking at him—waiting for him—made him realize Katsuki would’ve let him do it. He might have even wanted him to do it.

“You’re both doing fabulous!” the photographer called out to them, packing his camera into his bag and getting ready to leave. “I just got word that what we have now should be good, so we’ll stop there. Thank you for your time! Lock the door on your way out after you change.”

The pair stayed frozen in place, with Izuku’s arms around Katsuki’s neck and Katsuki’s hands resting on Izuku’s waist, while the photographer and his supervisor left.

“Kacchan,” Izuku cooed once they were gone. “Did you want to…?”

Love the story, love the bakudeku! Very, very good bakudeku TT_TT very sweet *There is some mature content in here as well

point to a map (we’ve been there) - cosmicfuss (10589 words)

Summary: Serendipity / sĕr″ən-dĭp′ĭ-tē Serendipity is the occurrence of an unplanned fortunate discovery. Two men find themselves on a subway, hot coffee on one while the other is in the middle of a screaming match. After that they can't seem to stop finding each other, no matter how far they go.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; this fic owns my entire soul. I love the story, the ease of their relationship, just how lovely they are together. It’s another kind of nice, fluffy fic you’d read on a bad day where you come home and curl up in a blanket and listen to a ten hour video of thunderstorm white noise. *Again, some more mature content in here

Partners - tsukithewolf (13619 words) Another series! Two parts to this one this time

Summary: It is said that in Musutafu there is a charm that one can buy at a temple that will lead you to your destined partner. They say that if the charm works, you would be able to follow the red string of fate to the person you were meant to be with. And if the person returns your feelings, they would be able to see the string as well, proving that both were meant to be.

Three-year-old Katsuki and Izuku misunderstand what the word "partner" means and discover the charm and the rumor behind it is not only true, but more than expected.

Gets a little heavy, depression, bullying, suicidal thoughts, etc. But it must get worse before it gets better, that kind of thing. I also just adore the second part (called Bond) - maybe because it’s much fluffier, what about it?

Learning Curve - iknewaman (10304 words)

Summary: “Izuku.” Uraraka repeats as she motions at the person stood next to her. Green curls, average height, and, well. Up close, not such a bad smile. Uraraka points a thumb at Bakugou and enunciates slowly, “This is Bakugou. He can speak sign language too.”

Wait. Sign language?

The stranger— well, Izuku— looks at him with a raised brow. Their free hand lifts up as they make a slight motion of the hand.‘

Really?’

*

Bored out of his mind at a house party one night Bakugou is introduced to Izuku, a deaf student who offers to help teach Bakugou sign language in exchange for a favour-- or well, is prompted into asking for a favour.

Ah, I really want to explain this one a little bit? I’d never been into fanfiction ever, only really getting into it with these boys. This was the second one I read, I remember, and it caught me off guard, and it intrigued me. It really surprised me as to what fanfiction could be. Ngl I had biased perceptions of fanfics - I used to be one of those people who thought fanfiction could never be good writing - and this one slapped me in the face with it’s subtle beauty and creative story and heart melting capabilities, and very, very real relationship and growth. Anyways it’s so cute how happy Deku is to teach Kacchan sign language TT_TT Make sure to read the tags!

The Keeper and the Sun God’s Heir - SurelyHeavenWaits (12746 words)

Summary:  The Titans' have stolen something important from Izuku, heir of the Sun God, and he wants it back.

This one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one, this one this one- Oh my god this one. Okay so what, I was a Percy Jackson kid, what about it? I love the mythical aus, particularly the god ones. But beyond that, the writing is so beautiful, just like the world, and the imagery. The bakudeku...absolutely stunning. The story itself? Incredible. Cannot recommend more. *There is explicit content in this, though I will say, it’s all in the last chapter, and all of the story is in the first two chapters. There’s also a second part as it’s a series and it’s short but it’s cute and sweet TT_TT

seven days - aaAAAaaahhhhHHHHH (10094 words)

Summary: There’s something about the green haired boy, an aura that just drew Katsuki in before he even knew his name.

[Sometimes your mind forgets, but your heart remembers]

Heed my warning: DON’T read this in front of other people. I bawl every time I read this one TT_TT I know I said I don’t like angst but AJLSKDFJALSKDFJ it has a hopeful ending! I mean yeah you’re gonna cry but...hope? :’) (that username really says it all tbh)

Fics 30k+

Notice me, nerd - useless_donut (40000 words)

Summary: Bakugou is in love with Midoriya. He doesn’t hide it, in fact it’s so painfully obvious that the entire class of 3-A has him figured out in a matter of months (days, in some cases). Too bad Midoriya is the most oblivious motherfucker out there, and Bakugou is too damn stubborn to actually ask him out.

Will the class of 3-A survive the sexual tension? Who will snap first? Someone put Bakugou out of his misery, please, before everyone else dies of second-hand embarrassment.

(a love story as witnessed by the class of 3-A)

Love the idea of Bakugou being brazen and brash, cause yeah, he is. So fucking funny though how that translates to him flirting. Gotta say, thought I was gonna cringe, but his “I’m gay af” outfit really ended up being A Look. Love the mutual pining, it really is strong in this one. *Okay, mature content in this one lads.

While You Were Sleeping - Belkacaramelka (71197 words)

Summary: The one where quirkless fanboy Midoriya Izuku rescues Pro Hero Todoroki Shouto, gets mistaken as his fiancé while he is in a coma, and gets caught up in the most unlikely fake engagement... until his childhood enemy and Todoroki's classmate Bakugou Katsuki tries to catch him out, and they both end up discovering a lot more about each other than they'd expected.

Quirkless AU based on the film; endgame BakuDeku. -- Katsuki didn’t know when the change had happened: how he had gone from asking why Todoroki chose Deku of all people, to wondering why it was Todoroki that Deku chose. Troublesome Deku, who cooed like an idiot at cats, tripped at a random catcall and sang badly. Who, despite everything, proved that it wasn’t the quirk that defined a person. Deku, who was too much, not his, and undeniably off limits to begin with.

Update: Epilogue added

*This one has mature content. If you can, please, for the love of god, read this fic. It’s like, tied with my favorite bkdk fic perhaps ever. It’s based on the movie of the same title, a nineties romcom with Sandra Bullock, but Belkacaramelka has so effortlessly made it into it’s own story, fit it so perfectly inside of the bnha world. I definitely stayed up until 6:30am reading this one. It’s got such good badass Midoriya, who is also sweet, and really really good reconciliation between bakudeku.

All Gifted - fitzefitcher (39129 words)

Summary: The thing about gifts is that they're meant to be given, they're meant to be shared; so Izuku will take his gifts, so freely given to him, and share them with all he holds dear.

Izuku is born without any gifts, as his kind often are, to a witch mother and salamander father, on one sweltering night in July.

This one is unfinished...and I highly doubt it will ever be. But what has been written is incredible. Once again, I’m a sucker for the magic/mythical creatures aus. But the relationship is great! The characterization is great! The found family trope that was building up is great!

under a hollow sun - umbrage (40572 words)

Summary: Midoriya is cursed with emptiness.

Misfortune leads him to a man of ancient magic and endless rage.

To stop an unfathomable evil, their mismatched halves must become whole.

Uuuggghhhh this was so good! I don’t think it’s going to be finished either :( Once again, fantasy au, more amazing writing, on point characterization, incredible pacing, makes you hungry for more story.

all the savage soul requires - majjale (58032 words)

Summary: Bakugou seems to have exhausted his patience for words and no longer acknowledges that Midoriya exists, so Midoriya crosses his legs, stares down at his hands limned in firelight, and makes a list of things he knows.

One. His name is Midoriya Izuku.

Two. He is a Godmarked, future god of life, heir to the divine throne.

Three. The gods have been fighting Death for eons, and now he's coming for recompense with everything he’s got.

This is majjale, so of course, the writing is more than beautiful; it’s absolutely breathtaking. This may be my favorite fic ever - unfortunately I don’t think it will ever be finished either TT_TT There’s the gods/fantasy au, which you know by now I love. But the characterization of our two boys is absolutely perfect, and I mean that as literally as possible. And the story being crafted between the two, the memory loss, the obvious history muddled by it all, it was so dense, and the PINING, so incredibly written, flowing so naturally. It wasn’t even close to being done, but it was wonderful, still is wonderful. 

My Writing: (You can skip this if you hate shameless self promotion)

You’re too damn flicking cute (1815 words)

Summary:  Bakugou is certain his shitty boyfriend is instigating kisses. Maybe it doesn't help that he keeps giving them away like it's a damn going out of business sale, but the stupid nerd is too fucking cute. Either way, like everything else, this is a competition, and he's going to win it.

Please don’t read this unless you’re going to the dentist afterwards! I’ve been told it’s so sweet it’ll give you instant cavities >_>;;;;

Bakugou Katsuki, you smooth motherfucker (10118 words)

Summary: Everyone around him knows that Bakugou Katsuki has a very special way with words. To the untrained ear he is loud and crass; to those that speak Kacchan, he is caring and inspiring. Yet there are rare moments, moments so fleeting you blink and you miss them, where Bakugou’s words pierce straight through Midoriya’s chest, and surprise everyone around him.

Goddammit, if only he would say them to Midoriya’s face.

Or, the five times Bakugou said something nice about Midoriya, and the one time he said something kind to him (but that was too long of a title).

I think most would consider this my best published fic; it’s one of those snapshot fics, “the five times where x did this, and the one time where they didn’t.” The recurring comment I get on this one is both of them being super in character, so I think that’s it’s defining characteristic! Bakugou and Midoriya have never known a life without the other, and in a perfect world, they never will.

Here, let me fix that (11247 words)

Summary: Bakugou honestly never thought he’d see Deku ever again. And now that they were together in this tiny compartment, alone for the next two and a half minutes, he had no clue what to say. He’d just apologized, right? So perhaps he could leave it at that and carry on with the original plan to never see the green-haired man that reminded him of dense forests, late night adventures, and tear-stained faces, ever again.

Ha! Who is he kidding? These bitches are soulmates.

I’ve gotten some critiques on this one, so sorry in advance if it’s not to your liking! Basically, what if Midoriya never got his quirk? Obviously, life would find a way to put them together because, as previously stated, these bitches are soulmates.

Plenty of Time (16654 words)

Summary: Bakugou found what little sleep he got restless and filled with nightmares that he forgot the second he opened his eyes. Tonight was the first time in a long time where he just had a normal dream - and it happened to be about Deku.

How fucking typical.

In other words, two dorks realize they have feelings for each other but don't know what to do about said feelings.

Ah, my first fic. Very simple, boys being boys, kinda like a slow burn? Idk how to explain this one, just boys figuring out their feelings and trying to figure out what to do about them. Been told these two are a little stupid but I think that’s valid.

We’re all time bombs waiting to explode (39223 words)

Summary: We have now entered the slipstream of time, into an alternate dimension where it neither is, nor isn’t, the 80’s. Two teenagers, burdened with the weight of adolescence in the modern world, find themselves struggling side by side, in part because of each other.

Bakugou, the most popular boy in school, has everything he could possibly want; status, power, and an unbreakable will. Having been dragged along behind him all the way to the top, Midoriya can’t help but wonder how (and why) he ended up standing beside his childhood friend-turned bully-turned friend again, weighed down by their complicated past and present. As the tension between them grows every day, and the arrival of a new, pretty face causes it to peak, it won’t be long before something - or someone - snaps.

I am...very bad at titles, and summaries apparently. This was my Heathers au, but it very quickly diverges from the original (I don’t do sad endings....) *This one has mature content, including implied sexual activity, drug use, and underage drinking, along with other heavy topics; please read the tags! Though tbh Midoriya is 17 for a couple weeks before it hits his birthday halfway through, so keep that in mind I guess? I kind of went heavy with this one, but I think the pay off was immense. This is the one with the most amount of comments stating it’s their favorite bkdk fic ever (and I cry). It’s a rough start, with a rough journey, but so is bakudeku! There’s a lot of petty drama, and then all of a sudden it’s Not That Petty and very much Far Too Real. Many have cried reading the ending, I cried writing it. My sister says it’s her favorite of mine. Now, I did kind of push this out without polishing it so much because I was losing my willpower, so if it feels lacking, that’s one hundred percent my fault.

Okay that was a lot! It took me a couple days...I hope I wasn’t too annoying with all my opinions! Please have a nice day. and enjoy some good reads, even if they aren’t the ones in this post!

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

Don’t Leave - Cardinal Copia (Papa Emeritus IV)

This one is also based on dream I had.

My dream was that I was part of the church/ministry/clergy/whatthefuckever and I had to move to either France or Virginia (idk). I didn’t wanna go obviously and told Copia about it. I don’t remember him having that much of a reaction lol. But for the sake of fiction, he did. I moved away in my dream unfortunately, but I’ll make this have a happy ending.😇

Enjoy my subconscious!

~~~~~~~~~~

Everyone in the church gasped. Some cried out, some sobbed. But it was most of the same. The news had came.

Papa Nihil was dead.

We were already accepting the new Papa Emeritus the 4th. Everyone loved the Cardinal anyway. But everyone loved Papa Nihil, he was a soft spot for most people. Some members of the church even knew him when he was the first to run the church.

It was a sad day.

On top of that, I had just found out this morning that my parents and I were to move to a different state.

It seemed like it was going to be a week full of bad days.

I tried not to sob when I got dressed for mass this morning. I had no idea what I’d do without this church. It was like a second home to me.

I’d volunteer whenever I could to help the Ministry out. I’m so active in the church that even the Ghouls from the band project knew me! I would’ve become a true member of the church if it wasn’t for my parents.

It’s not like they didn’t approve, but they just needed me.

I was their only child. I wouldn’t want them to think I was leaving them. I couldn’t.

On the other hand, the Ministry has reached out to me and asked if I wanted to become a Sister of Sin multiple times. They love my enthusiasm and think I have the potential to so even more. Sister Imperator actually thinks very highly of me. And Papa Emeritus III, when he was alive, actually sought me out to see if I wanted to join the band (and maybe for other reasons of his own).

I wanted to...I really wanted to. It was even harder to turn down the Cardinal when he asked as well. I just knew my parents needed me.

Coming to this mass knowing it would be my last really hurt, then hearing the news about Nihil...I don’t know how I’ll be able to tell everyone that I have to leave.

After the service, I saw Sister Imperator in the distance, hugging a few people. They were probably giving her their condolences since everyone knew how much they cared for each other.

I trudged over to her sorrowfully, almost hoping that she would be too busy to talk to me. But the universe just had it out for me today, and she quickly noticed how pitiful I looked.

She quickly brought me into a loving embrace, much like a mother’s. I was quickly brought to tears when I thought that this would probably be the last hugging Sister.

“I’m so sorry, Sister.” I cried.

It had a double meaning for me, obviously. I was so sorry about Papa Nihil dying, but I was sorry about having to leave. But she didn’t know the other meaning yet.

“He lived a good life, Y/N.” She whispered, rubbing my back soothingly.

I pulled away from her and scratched the back of my head nervously, avoiding her eyes.

She sighed. “That’s not the only reason you’re sorry. What’s happened?”

“I’m...I’m moving away.” I choked out. Sister Imperator immediately frowned and gave me a sad look. “My parents told me this morning. We leave in two days.”

She quickly pulled me back into a hug. I held on tightly, trying to keep myself from breaking down in front of everyone. “Have you told Cardinal yet?”

I froze. That was the thing I was dreading the most...

I shook my head no and I could feel her loosing her grip on me. She pulled away from the hug, tears brimming her eyes, making me feel guilty. “He’s going to be so devastated. He really has taken a liking to you, dear.” She said, making me feel even more guilty.

I sighed. “I know...it’s just so hard knowing that he’ll be so sad.” I wiped a stray tear that was rolling down my cheek.

Sister brought her hand up and caressed my cheek, smiling sadly. “It has to be done, sweetie. Ripping off the band-aid.”

I nodded and placed my hand above hers. She quickly pointed out Cardinal Copia, now named Papa Emeritus IV, in the group of people and encouraged me to walk over to him.

I nervously approached him, seeing his eyes brighten with joy as he noticed me.

Damn...

“Hey, Cop- uh, Papa.” I stutter. I always called him Copia, but now he’s much more higher up now, taking on the role of Papa Emeritus now.

Copia smiled and shook his head slightly. “You don’t have to he so formal with me, dolcezza. Just because I’m Papa now doesn’t mean you have to call me that.” He told me in his endearing Italian accent.

Oh lucifer, I’m gonna miss him...

“I, uh, need to talk to you.” I said, and he gestured for me to continue speaking. But I looked around nervously at all the people close by, and he quickly realized that I meant in private.

He guided me over to the corner of the room, away from the group. “Now, what is it, cara mia?”

Come on, Y/N. Just like ripping off a band-aid...

“Copia...I’m moving away...in two days.”

My words hung in the air with a bitter silence. Nervousness filled me to the brim when he looked like he didn’t even hear me at first, so afraid that I’d have to repeat myself. The nervousness quickly turned into anxiety when his face finally contorted from shock to a frown. He didn’t say anything. Not even a sigh of displeasure, but his eyes never met mine. But if they did, they would be filled with heartache.

I was stunned into silence when Copia quickly walked off, not even saying so much as a goodbye. He pushed past all the people (and Ghouls), heading to his new office in the church.

“Y/N?” A warm hand was placed on my shoulder, Sister’s hand.

“He didn’t even say anything. He just...left.” I reached up and covered my mouth to muffle the hiccups caused by trying not to cry this whole morning, but a few escaped the sound barrier that my hand caused and reached Sister’s ears.

“Go find him.”

I turned around and looked at Sister Imperator in shock. “Find him? He couldn’t even look at me!”

“He’s in shock, dear. He probably just needs a few minutes to process it. Go to his office after everyone leaves. That’ll be enough time to mull his over. And if he won’t see you, I’ll go into that silly office of his and smack him in the head.”

I laugh tearfully. I love this woman. “Okay.” I agreed.

“Good.” She nodded. “Now, you might want to go say goodbye to everyone else.”

I sigh and look over to the group of people (+Ghouls) that I’ve made friends with and grew to care about for years now. This won’t be easy either...

After about a half hour of goodbyes, hugs, and more tears (and some sorrowful mewling from some of the Ghouls), everyone started to trickle off. Heading back home, going about their lives the same way it’s always been for them.

When I get home, I’ll have to start packing my life away into cardboard boxes.

I shook the thought away quickly.

It was eerily quiet in the church now the everyone headed out. It was time for me to confront Copia...again.

I walked out of the chapel and into the great foyer of the church, looking up to see the stained glass murals of all the previous Papas embedded into the wall. The sun shining on the glass from the outside making the hall glow in certain colors of the memorial pieces.

I’m gonna miss this place.

I reach the end of the hall where Copia’s office was. I quietly sigh and rap my knuckles against the wooden door. I heard a faint, “Who is it?”

“Copia...it’s me.”

There was no response, but I waited at the door.

“I want to talk to you, Copia...please.” I almost whined, leaning my head against the door.

I quickly took a couple steps back when I started to hear footsteps approach, quickly opening the door to reveal Copia. He was out of his Anti-pope robes and into his regular suit, his Papa paint almost completely off, but it still looked smudged in places.

If only he used the makeup remover wipes I brought him...

I stepped into the office, turned around and closed the door. Turning back, Copia was back at his desk. He was sitting on the desk top, his right leg swinging slightly, looking at me expectantly. “Well?” He said.

“Copia, I-”

“It’s Papa.” He deadpanned.

I sighed in frustration. “I never wanted this to happen, Copia.”

“Then why? Why are you choosing to move?”

“I...” I tried holding back tears, making my eyes burn. “It’s my parents...”

“Your parents are making you move?” He laughed bitterly. “I thought you were a grown woman who could make decisions for herself?”

I looked down, gravity forcing the tears out of my eyes, landing on the floor with muted thud.

I heard Copia sigh. The desk creaked slightly when he stood up from it, hearing his footsteps get closer until he was right in front of me.

He tucked his pointer finger under my chin and gently raised my head, making me look into his eyes that seemed regretful.

“Why are you moving, cara mia?” He asked softly.

“I don’t want my parents to think I abandoned them.” I whimpered.

“Oh, mia dolce, your parents aren’t going to think you abandoned them if you wanted to stay.” Copia cooed, now caressed my hair. “All the times you said you couldn’t join us, was it because of your parents?”

I reluctantly nodded. “They...they need me.”

“Come on.” Copia suddenly started pulling me towards the office telephone. “Call them. Tell them what you really feel.”

I blushed and started panicking. “W-what? N-no! I can’t do that!”

He sighed, and started dialing my parents’ phone number. “I know you parents, cara mia. They’ll understand. Trust me.” He said.

I was panicked as the phone rang, but seeing how confident Copia was about my parents made me feel a little less stressed. Him holding my hand the entire time helped too.

“Hello?” The cheery voice of my mom answered.

“M-mom?” My voice trembled.

“Oh hi, dear! We were just packing! Are you still at the church?”

I sigh, here goes. “Mom, I...I don’t want to move. I want to stay here. I love it here so much, and...I want to join the church! I want to become a member...are you mad?”

I flinched when my mom laughed loudly into the phone, making me furrow my eyebrows. “Honey, I was wondering when you were gonna break!”

“W-what?”

“You don’t think I know my own child? I knew you were going to stay at that church. Your father and I actually made a bet to see how long you’d put up with all this moving shit!” She laughed again.

“Wait...so, you’re not mad?” I asked, still shocked.

“Of course not, sweetie! I know how much that church makes you happy. All we want is for you to be happy, hon.”

“I thought you needed me.”

“Oh sweetheart, we’ll always need you. But if you’re happy, then we’re happy. We knew you weren’t gonna stay with us forever! You have a life too, as well as us. Plus, we’re not 90 year old people who need someone to carry us every time we need to take a shit! We can take care of ourselves.”

I looked over to Copia with a grin, and he smiled back softly and mouthed, “I told you so.”

“Now, come home and help us pack up all out shit!” My mom said with a laugh and hung up.

As soon as she hung up, I squealed in joy and jumped into Copia’s arms. He staggered back by sudden force of my happiness, but he laughed breathlessly. “Didn’t I say to trust me?” He said as he pulled away, looking at me with a goofy grin.

I don’t know what came over me, but I reached out and brought his face down to mine, shocking him still when I pushed my lips up against his.

I quickly realized what I was doing and pulled away. “Uh...I’m so sorry! I don’t-”

Copia cut me off mid-sentence, bringing me into another spur of the moment kiss.

I immediately relaxed and reciprocated his kiss, reaching up to tangle my fingers in his slicked back hair and him bringing his arms to wrap around my waist to pull me closer. I smile into the kiss, feeling his mustache tickle at my sensitive skin.

This moment was perfect.

We both pulled away. The heat of moment taking our breath away, making us both take deep inhales to get oxygen rushing to the brain.

“Cara mia, I’ve waited for this moment for so long.” Copia smiled.

I let him know that I felt the same way by giving him another peck on the lips. “Looks like you’re stuck with me from now on.” I grinned.

“That is not something to feel bad about, mia dolce.”

“Not at all.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Don’t really know how churches of Satan go about having services if they even have them, but in my dream we were in a regular looking church soooo...

What I actually saw in my dream: Copia not having a reaction to me leaving (what a heartless bastard) and the stained glass murals to the Papas.

[riordanversephantom]

So hi, since I’ve been crying for like... the past hour? (Lol future Phantom here, it’s taken me like an hour to compile this)  here’s a collection of moments from my Riordanverse fanfics that I really like or made me chuckle because I need some feel good.  These are all from my Ao3 and I’ll leave links.

--

“You know usually people show up at someone’s house when the person is home,” Nico said, starting to make himself a sandwich. Thalia laughed.

“You’re telling me that while you’re sitting here the same as me making a sandwich?” She leaned back on the stool, gripping the counter to keep her balance. Nico rolled his eyes.

“I don’t intend to show up while he’s not here.”

“You’re funny Nico.”

“Thanks, I get that a lot,” Nico raised one eyebrow, Thalia laughed again.

(Percy’s not home)

--

“Jason fractured his ankle...while on the rock wall…” Will looked up at Nico, “he can fly, how did he do that?”

“He’s silly like that.”

Will paused for so long that Nico thought he had finally fallen asleep.

“Cecil brought me some Zebra cakes today,” Will mumbled, “he wasn’t injured but they tasted good.  I appreciated it.  He probably stole them.”

(Just go to bed)

More under the cut

Nico couldn’t help but crack a small smile, “thanks Kayla.”  He gently took the sweatshirt from her.  This was one of Will’s favorites (and also Nico’s favorite to take).

“Since you’re practically a member of the family now, I wanted to look out for you,” she yawned and glanced behind her, “since things have been a bit quiet with Will visiting his mom.”

“Yeah,” Nico agreed.

She smiled, “I guess I’ll let you get back to bed.”

Nico nodded, “goodnight Kayla.”

“Goodnight Nico,” she yawned again and started to trudge back to her cabin.

(Miss him the most)

--

“Look at you, I think we still need to have that competition of who looks worse after crying,” Will smirked.

“I still think it’s you,” Kayla cracked a small smile.

“It’s probably still me,” Will sighed, “let’s get back before Austin gets worried and the harpies come kill us though.”

“Yeah…”

(I’m still here)

--

But Will, half asleep and frightened had somehow ended up on the front porch of the Hades cabin at four in the morning.  When Nico opened the door he had stumbled into Nico’s arms, enveloping Nico into a huge hug.

“Oh,” Nico whispered, running his fingers through Will’s hair.

“I…” Will swallowed hard, “nightmare I… didn’t know… what to do.”

He wasn’t crying but the panic was evident in his voice.  Nico nodded silently and led Will inside, shutting the door behind him.

(Understand that I love you, dear)

--

“It’s fine,” Leo wiped some grease on his shirt and shifted on the chair, “I know what I’m doing.”

Jason doubted that, but he crossed his arms in front of his chest and watched.  Leo’s chair that he was standing on looked old and worn, it looked very close to falling apart.  Jason got a bit closer just in case Leo fell.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to help you?” Jason asked again.

“Why? Are you worried?” Leo let out a sigh and turned to Jason, the chair wobbled and he threw his arm out to steady himself.  Jason hissed and quickly stepped forward, his arms outstretched.

“Yeah, a bit,” Jason responded, “I don’t want you to fall.  Let me help.”

(How tall are you)

--

“I’m thinking about hiding away in the woods for a while, maybe we could talk, maybe kiss,” Leo suggested with a shrug.

(How tall are you)

--

Will buried his face in his hands, tugging at his bangs.  He didn’t say anything, Nico was too afraid to do anything at the moment.

Finally, Will let out a shaky sigh, running his fingers through his hair, “you know what,” he laughed without humor, “nope, it’s been a long week.”  Will turned towards the desk and started to tidy up the papers he was working on.

“I’m going to bed, I can’t do this right now.  I haven’t slept all week and I’m exhausted,” Will turned back to Nico and put a hand on his shoulder, he smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes, “I’m glad you’re back Nico.  I’m too angry to actually welcome you home properly so instead I’m going to sleep for the rest of the day.  Then come back to this conversation as a well rested organized individual.”

(Cause it hurts)

--

(like go seek out any other of his friends to alert them of his return, or iris messaging his sister to let her know he was all right) he sulked back to his cabin.

He did eventually do the second thing and Hazel was more than thrilled and relieved.  Though when he first iris messaged her, she yelled at him so loudly Frank and a couple other kids actually came in to see what was going on.

(Cause it hurts)

--

“Did you come here for something?” Will finally asked, clicking his pen absently.  He looked back over at Nico.

“Oh right,” Nico walked over to where Will was sitting and plopped himself right on top of the desk, “I came for you.”

“For me?” Will raised one eyebrow, leaning his chin on his elbow.  

“It’s getting late, I was getting impatient for you to come back,” Nico said, crossing his arms in front of his chest stubbornly.

“Oh so you missed me?” Will smirked.  Nico thought he shouldn’t look so smug.

“Don’t act like you don’t miss me too when I leave for a bit,” Nico huffed.

“I’m not going to act, I’ve admitted it before and I’ll do it again.”

(I trust you as my eyes)

--

“There we go, that’s my Will,” Nico mumbled, “sometimes nightmares are just nightmares.  Nothing more.”

“No stupid prophecy or foreseeing of death,” Will squeezed Nico tighter.

“Just a normal old punch in the gut from your subconscious.”

“I hate my subconscious.”

“Me too.”

(My subconscious hates me)

--

“Oh, hello Sunshine.”

Kayla woke to her brother’s voice.  For a second she thought he was going insane and actually talking to the sun.  Then she remembered what happened at three am last night… or well, this morning.

(Not yet brother in law)

--

The two of them were quiet again.  A leaf fluttered onto Percy’s face.  Annabeth swiped it away without a thought.  He licked her hand.

“Gross, Percy!  Are you ten?” Annabeth cried out, wiping her hand on Percy’s shirt.

He laughed, “you asked for it, putting your hand too close to my mouth.”

“I was getting a lead off of you like a loving girlfriend.”

He stuck his tongue out at her.  Annabeth furrowed her eyebrows, gathering a ton of leaves that were settled around her and dropped them on his face.  He sat up spluttering, spitting leaves out of his mouth.

“That wasn’t nice!” He exclaimed, shaking the leaves from his hair.

(Content)

--

“You’re a whore,” Drew glared at Will.

Lacy gasped, she looked like she wanted to say anything, but she didn’t.

“ Wow ,” Will puffed out his cheeks before letting out a slow breath, “A whore ?  I’ve been called a lot of things, but a whore ?  That ones new.”

“Just like Apollo,” She crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“Oh yeah, that makes sense,” Will nodded in agreement, “but, well I hate to break it to you, but I’d like to think I’m pretty faithful to my boyfriend.  Unlike you so, I think that the term ‘ whore ’ would better apply to you.”  Will clicked his tongue and shrugged.

“Well,” Drew spluttered, obviously running out of insults, “at least I can get a date without even having to try.”

“Drew that is enough,” Piper spoke firmly, her voice cold, “you too Will.” She seemed a bit reluctant about that last part.

Will held up his hands in defense, “hey, I didn’t do anything.  Anyway, getting a date with no effort doesn’t really sound like love.”

“ Will, ” Piper shot him a pointed look, Will shrugged.

(Nail polish is gay)

I mean obviously there are a ton more since I have so many fics on my Ao3 but this was just a couple (a lot) from some of my more “recent” fics.  If you’ve made it this far, thanks and I hope you liked these small little bits.  Check out my Ao3 for more riordanverse fics and follow me on TikTok for cosplay (@phantomxlegend for both).

<3

[canidbutch]

okay some top surgery day talk real quick actually! because so much went so well and aaaagh

it really went SO well and everyone was BEYOND sweet and kind and even when i got misgendered it was all on accident and they tried really hard to correct it and my surgeon himself was like disappointed to hear that it happened at the front desk and whatnot and he called me personally a few hrs after i left? never heard of that, was v courteous.

and then after changing into my pajamas i went to say something to my roommate and i just like glanced in the mirror earlier and did a serious double take and started tearing up and smiling and they were losing it they just got up to fuss over me and we stood in the hallway just grinning sbbdkdbdkf.

and good news on their end too! they got called into the city to do a casting for MAC and! did that while i was getting my stuff done, and got to wander around the city and shop a little bit. they deserved that so much and i am so excited for them nothing but good vibes and crossed fingers for them!

and also MAN! okay. i don't talk about my DID on here much. but when i was in recovery, two of my alters played round fuckin robin and literally Talked To Me through my own human mouth just to tell me they were so proud of me and they think i need to get on T at some point? and that sort of thing has Never happened to me before it was overwhelming and i cried like a BITCH it was so kebejdjd like it's the type of shit that sounds fake as hell but i could not turn off elliot's shitty southern accent OR the crying it was a lot LIKDJSKRBKDBD

he told me "the girls had their turn and they fucked it, it's your turn now, you do what you need to do, man. i'm so fucking proud of you."

like when i say i cried like a bitch. it genuinely got me i was a Mess and the nurse came in like oh talking to yourself? and tbh i actually explained (in short terms) and she just kind of stared at me which hey i get it but my mom reacted so naturally when i laughed about it to her because she's actually said before that my whole system are her kids too and

that means a lot to hear from a parent

also she agreed to start using "son" for me for a while to test it out! and when she came into the recovery room she greeted me with "hey handsome!" and i fucking. can't handle this

you know i had someone send me the nastiest anon on my tma blog this morning about all this that stuck with me all day and i still do not understand what would have possessed them to. i don't need to share all the reasons why this Does benefit me and Will change things for me to justify the choice but good g-d some people are literally JUST trans. they deserve to do whatever they have to for their bodies to feel Right? fuck you man you act like i drop $10k on just anything as if i didn't spend 20+ yrs of life on the brink of actual death largely in part due to how i did not feel okay about my body. LOL.

SO ANYWAY!!!! all in all an excellent time! even if there were some setbacks like initially showing up at the wrong fucking hospital because they told me the damn address wrong (???? still do not know how they did that lol), the aggressive misgendering at first, the anesthesiologist being unable to get an IV in at first, and the whole surgery being delayed about 45 minutes (NOT bad at all, they said an hour and a half but they beat it!), the fact that i’m not going to be able to get chiropractic adjustments for a Hot Minute and therefore MAY die a little bit, and like. yeah, okay i am v bruised! so what!!!! that happens. i will be fine! i am fine!

and i really want to consider starting T so if anyone has any words of wisdom my DM is wide open

omg i typed wife open jhbknlm open for wife applications too...

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #425

“evolution repressed by our backwards contest  /  breeding our torrential demise as we come to this edge”

Serious question, peanut butter or nutella? I think Nutella is a godsend, but I use peanut butter waaaaay more often. We don't even really buy Nutella because I will destroy the jar. Do you prefer baked potatoes or mashed potatoes? Baked. What is your oldest sibling’s middle name? Kathryn. I think. Do you like breadsticks? I just like bread, man. What are your favorite things to spend money on? Tattoos, uuuuugggghhhhh <3 Which would you rather have a new puppy or kitten? Neither, really. Most puppies drive me insane (even though they're cute as everliving fuck), and I don't want another cat. Mom actually talked about getting another, but I really just want my one boy. Roman would get SO jealous, anyway. I enjoy just having my baby. How old will you be on your next birthday? 26. Yikes. Do you ever feel self-conscious when you eat around other people? As "the fat one," I can be sometimes. I would say though that more often than not, it's sort of whatever to me because I'm a human that has to eat. When you opened your eyes this morning, what were your first thoughts? I thought I slept way later than I actually did. What is one thing in the room you’re in that reminds you of somebody? My stuffed meerkat Rebel. Jason got it for me for my first birthday that we were together. Could you ever be friends with somebody who was homophobic? Never again. I was once able to think "agree to disagree," but sometimes by doing so, you're siding with evil by not enforcing what is more than just a belief. It should come with being a human. Also given my own sexuality, it would be a slap in the face to me. Would you ever want to be a supermodel, or date one? Hell no. I'd date one though, if they were modest about their position. Honestly, have you ever made fun of somebody so bad they cried? Wow, no. Honestly, would you rather be complimented on your looks or intelligence? Quite frankly, nowadays, my appearance. I need it. My self-confidence is so far below "shit." Have you ever purchased a pregnancy test, for yourself or otherwise? Nope. You can get one thing, anything, for free right now. What do you pick? Why? Hm. I know I talk about it a lot, but it would still probably be a 40 gallon terrarium for Venus. She needs - and deserves - it. Honestly, have you ever danced naked? NOOOOOOOO. What was the first illegal thing that you did? Did you get caught? Downloaded music. My mom eventually found out, but didn't care much. What is the home page on the computer you’re on? Google. Do you like to write poetry? I do, but I haven't done it in a while. :/ Are your ears pierced? Yes. If so, were they pierced with a piercing gun, or with a sterile needle? Piercing gun. Which, by the way, do not do. There are many more risks with a piercing gun versus a needle by a professional. Do you wear makeup regularly? I never do. Did you eat cereal for breakfast today? No. I've been on a bagel kick lately. When was the last time you tripped over something? Last night, actually. The rug in the living room was slightly turned up, and I tripped in the dark. I didn't actually fall, thankfully. Any obsessive-compulsive tendencies? I'm diagnosed with OCD. I experience more ruminations and intrusive thoughts more than obsessive behaviors, though. Who was the last person you yelled at? Probably Mom. Why did you yell at them? I don't remember. Favorite type of apple? I like pink lady apples. I really enjoy any, so long as they're crisp. Ever seen live horse racing? No. To be totally honest, I don't really like the concept of it. Motivating a horse to run by hurting it doesn't exactly seem moral... How about live greyhound racing? No. What’s one thing, besides the obvious, that you couldn’t live without? The Internet, haha. Have you ever touched a giraffe? No. What does your mom call you? Britt. What stresses you out the most in life? I really don't think I could pick a top one. There are so many. Do you play any PC games? What is your favorite? Yeah. Y'all probably know WoW is my favorite. If you were pregnant, how would you tell the father? Well, that would depend on the circumstances. Did we want a baby? Was it a bad surprise, a happy surprise? I can't answer this with just one idea. What’s the hardest level you can play on Guitar Hero? I used to be able to slam out Expert easily with only very few songs I had to play on Hard, but now it's been YEARS. I've played less than once in a blue moon, and my skill's definitely faded some. It really depends on the song. What ever happened with you and your first boyfriend? He couldn't handle my depression anymore. What’s your favorite country song? "When The Stars Go Blue" by Tim McGraw, probably. What is the worst thing a former boyfriend/girlfriend has done to you? Fail to communicate what he was feeling with me and then make a dashing break for it very, very abruptly after three and a half years. It put me past a state of shock, but trauma with how no less than obsessed I was with him. What were you for Halloween last year? I didn't dress up. :/ I wish I had the money and motivation alike to. Are you feeling guilty for something? I always will. Are you usually quiet or loud? Quiet. How many hours do you spend on the computer a day? Like... uh... all of them, oof. What is the show that you watched when you were little, and you still do? Meerkat Manor. Do your siblings text you? Not really. Do you want a small or big wedding? Small. Have you ever searched for your own house on Google Earth? Not the house I currently live in, but I have before. Who is your ex dating/talking to? I don't know. Ever kissed someone who smokes? No. Does it take a lot for someone to annoy you? Frankly, no. Do you own your own computer? This laptop, anyway. Did you ever have to share a room with one of your siblings? Yes, with my younger sister as a kid and pre-teen. What noises in the room you’re in, do you hear at the moment? I hear the video I'm watching, as well as my fan. Have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours? Yes. What’s the biggest upcoming event for you? Nothing. Not like that's a surprise. What do you typically order from Wendy’s? Son of the Baconator. @_@ Have you ever been given a lapdance by an actual stripper? No. Those are so awkward to me. What do you love most about yourself? I don't know these days. Have you ever received a hickey from the last person you kissed? No. What are you doing right now? This survey and re-watching John Wolfe play Outlast 2. What’s bothering you right now? I'm immensely nervous about tomorrow. I have my first (and I pray the fuck to God not only) session with my new personal trainer then, and I'm terrified by how my body and my mental fortitude is going to react. Y'all have no fucking idea JUST how out of shape I am, and the muscles in my legs seem basically non-existent by now. I have to do something about my health, though, and I'm determined to make this shit work. More than determined. I know the first day is going to be hard, but I need to do this more than I can explain. What was the last thing you drank? ... What great fucking timing, I have a can of Mountain Dew, lol... That's another thing that needs to change. I've gotta stop the emotional and boredom-eating and chill the fuck out with soda. Be honest, do you like people in general? Quite frankly, no. There are plenty of people I love and think are amazing, of course, but I think I lean towards humanity being too shitty to like "in general." Do you want your tongue pierced? I miss my snake eyes. :/ That was suuuuch a cute piercing. I just had to take it out for the safety of my teeth. I kept accidentally clamping down on one of the balls when eating, and it would cause tiny fractures. Do you change your phone background a lot? No. Have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something? No. Have you ever been strip searched? No. Do you have a funny last name? Does anyone make fun of it? It's not funny-sounding, no, I just think it's too manly for me to enjoy as part of my name. Ever have a drug overdose? What did you OD on exactly? Yes. Oddly enough, I don't remember what I OD'd on now... You'd think I would, given how extreme the situation was. It was some cold medicine. Do you get sick of people who call themselves bipolar all the time? I absolutely do. It's extremely insensitive to people like myself who legitimately suffer - and I do mean "suffer" - from the disorder. Describe your day so far in three words: Dull. Lazy. Anxious. What was the most stressful project you had so far/while in school? Probably my senior project and the presentation I had to do for it. I taught about the fallacies and misconceptions of snakes, and I made a PowerPoint and some drawings to color and crosswords for the special ed children. I was so, so very nervous, but I got through it fine and the kids seemed to enjoy it. I actually still have the recording. Choose one- Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers: MILKY WAY. FUCK I love those. Have you ever stepped in dog poop? UGH yes. What was the last thing you spent money on? My niece's birthday present. Have you ever slept in the same bed with the last person you kissed? Yeah. Is there a guy that knows a lot about you? I almost said "yes," but then I realized he doesn't know me at all anymore. I've changed so much, hopefully mostly for the better. He hasn't "known" me in many years. Is there someone you just can’t imagine your life without? It's terrifying to imagine my life without Mom; Sara, too. Do you prefer Starbucks coffee or small cafe coffee? I prefer no coffee. Would you ever consider getting a piercing in your septum? Nah. Do you enjoy being outdoors? If it's cool outside and I have somewhere to sit that's not the ground, yes. Do people tell you that you have an accent? Sometimes. Do you enjoy watching fireworks on the 4th of July? They're pretty, but I don't support their usage by this point in my life. They're a fire hazard, triggering to some vets with PTSD, and beyond terrifying for animals. What’re some unspeakable subjects for you? I get most heated about child molestation. You do not fucking touch a child like that. I don't even write any of my bajillion evil guys committing it in RP because I just can't stomach it. Even when my little sister (a children's social worker) is telling Mom about some stuff she sees at work, I have to not be present, 'cuz that shit isn't rare. It's nauseating. Is there anyone you would take a bullet for? A good number of people, honestly. Do you enjoy tanning? Hell no, I avoid the sun and heat at like all costs. Are you a virgin? This is going to sound weird, but I actually don't know, but I lean towards no. Who’s your celebrity crush? mARK EDWARD FISCHFUCK Did or do you get good grades in English class? I was always excellent in English. What part of your body are you self-conscious about? My stomach. But I'm self-conscious about everything else, too. Are you expected to help fix Thanksgiving dinner? No. Everyone knows I can't cook worth a damn. Have you ever lost anyone close to cancer? Truly close, no. Unless you include pets, actually. Then a few. :/ Do you personally know anyone who is transgender? Yep. When was the last time you got a shot? Earlier this year for Covid. Get your fucking vaccine, btw. :^)

[anxious-art-block]

NNT Headcanons Part 6 Quarantine Edition 2: Electric Boogaloo

Tristan and Lancelot did the whole swan princess thing where starting at around 10-11, their families would take turns spending summers in the other’s kingdom with each other( not for like a marriage thing) like the first summer Lancelot spends the summer in Liones and then the next one Tristan goes to the Faerie realm for the summer and vise versa

!!Socially Awkward Tristan!!

Absolute bookworm Tristan too. Like once he can read he always has a book, think Belle or Matilda except his family actually doesn’t care about the fact that he reads so much. He comes down for breakfast with his nose in a book and he runs into a chair almost every time until he eventually memorizes where they are so he’ll stop

His dad made sure he could read by like two

I like the idea that Lancelot has Elaine’s blond hair and Ban’s eyes so King and Diane’s kiddo calls him Blondie 

One time when Tristan is over at the Faerie realm he gets annoyed that Tris was spending the whole time reading and not spending time with him so he picks him up and jumps out the window and takes for a ride

I see that everyone pretty much has agreed that Lancelot got fairy wings so

!!Astronomy nerd Tristan!!

This hc list is pretty much gonna be him

He has his room, then he has an observatory off of his room next to his closet

He drags his Mel and Ellie out at like midnight to see eclipses, planetary alignments and meteor showers and such

Tristan wears his hair in a high ponytail when he’s older. He went from always keeping it down, to having it braided a lot, to having it tied up messily

!!Artist Lancelot!!

He likes to sketch animals(primarily birds) and draw landscapes

Tristan is really good at cards, like any game of cards he will win at, why? Who knows

He is a total momma’s boy

But I think we all knew that

Moving on

I have an oc kiddo for Gelda and Zel named Beatrix so imma include her

She was adopted at 8, nobody saw the two for like two years cause they took that time to help her get used to like royal life(start of it anyway) and just having parents, and she meets Tristan when they’re both 10

Tristan is super nervous and like hiding behind Ellie and she just stares at him, like, 0_0

For two minutes 

Then he whispers a hi and she shouts “HI THERE” and he screams

Great first impression but they hit it off once the parents leave them to it

He helps teach her to read, cause while Zel had started, he didn’t wanna throw that on her super quickly so when Beatrix see’s Tris reading he asks him what like 5 words say and he eventually asks her if she can read

And she’s like ‘lol no’ so he teaches her as much as he can within a 72 hour trip

She’s a daddy’s girl

And while not by blood, is DEFINITELY her father’s daughter, full of stubbornness and pride

Beatrix’s favorite thing about her family is that their colours consist of red, black, silver, gold and really really dark grey

When they get older, her and Tris are known as the ‘brains and the brawns’ thing

With Beatrix as the brawns and Tris as the brains

While they both can fight he is just smarter than her so that’s why he earned that title

Ellie passes out after Tris was born, she wasn’t out for long but she got overheated so she fainted like seconds after she heard his cries

Luckily she recovered like really quickly afterwards cause ~goddess magic bs~ 

Who likes angst? I like angst

King and Diane were the first couple to end up with child, it was technically accidental but they were happy nonetheless, and it wasn’t to long before Ellie and Elaine ended up pregnant

No one was shocked honestly that it was them first, since they were the first to be wed

It was a little boy named Gil(meaning happiness in Hebrew), he had his mom’s chocolate hair and his dad’s amber eyes, with freckles dotting his nose, he was their pride and joy

They lost him to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome

Diane was numb for weeks afterwards, she wouldn’t eat, her sleep was filled with nightmares and she refused to see anyone

Harley wasn’t doing any better, the only person he let see him was Elaine for a while. All he did was cry, so much at one point he gave himself a fever and he passed out 

It took almost two maybe three years for them to try again and when Diane went into labor she was hysterical and Harley was having a panic attack that Mel had to talk him through

Diane wouldn’t let the second baby out of her sight for the first year and a half, and when six months had hit she was most anxious cause Gil was six months old when they lost him

So they’re kiddo is the youngest of the four kiddos by like a year or two

When they lost Gil, Merlin had even come around cause it was the most heartbreaking thing in a while

Wow I actually almost made myself cry

But angst is my specialty so

You’re welcome, and remember 

Canon is mine to mess with and twist