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#carlos sainz#what my diet consists of#any day of the week any time or place#he gets on my nerves#hes the type of guy that is so annoying but if we were in a romcom i would fall in love with him
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the barista lady in the treviso café fucking giggles every time you buy the fancy coffee lucanis likes from her btw. can't believe the game is calling out rook and me like this
#I've tried it several times to check it wasn't a fluke and nope it does happen consistently I'm pretty sure it's intentional#bioware Know. they knowwww. they know exactly what I'm like and god bless them for it#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#café pietra barista gazing kindly at rye like 'I know what you are.' (a simp) while the tips of his ears go very very warm#clearly some sort of underlying drift compatability here since rook in one night can somehow manage to hit on all two (2)#of the elements of lucanis' instinctive understanding of courtship behaviour (knives and coffee/food) hfksjdfhas#in lucanis' defense when a guy buys you knives AND good coffee (despite not even drinking the stuff much himself) on a first date...#when your love language is that unhinged and they straight up compose a shakespeare level sonnet in it on the spot#seemingly without even realizing it. I mean what else can you be expected to do but fall so cataclysmically in love#that you'd kill god over it any day of the week easy. wild stuff#even wilder since in my playthrough he isn't entirely sure rye meant anything by it/as more than a friendly gesture#for like. MONTHS.#lucanis is a regular at that place and they all for sure know exactly who he is so can you IMAGINE the gossip that must start#after that conversation starts to take on a flirty edge. hotboi crown prince of the crows returns from the dead and is making eyes#at ~*mysterious stranger*~ who just showed up in town. some I hear netherfield park is let at last stuff going on for these guys#as they watch all of this go down
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Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!
#cats#holiday#OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few#days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below)#My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart#rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart#so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag#and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day#last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few#hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent#ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect#because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make#me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these#'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a#few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is#getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better#and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo#I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm..#pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c#Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after#like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread...#I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was#doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally#ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully#whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos#ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever.#And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely#though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart#stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive#things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***
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OH YEAH NO THATS GONNA HAUNT ME FOR AGES. MIKKSY SAYING PLAYBOYS AS HE PHONES INTO A FINNISH RADIO STATION COMPLETELY FUCKING PISSED
the whole exchange is so good (x)
#niko mikkola#florida panthers#if youll excuse me that audio is going to haunt me till the end of time#“has lunka been calling in?” he says like a big brother checking to see if his little brother is doing well in school#finns: unhinged edition#calling in while drunk...2 days in a row#“hey so sasha people are saying youre diligent and that youll start training for the fall early”#sasha with absolute no hesitation “one can get their steps in walking around tampere with the cup right?”#hes always been delightfully witty but with the air of “i just won a cup” it becomes so much hotter#so dumb the way my brain stuttered over mikksy saying miami#unfortunately i am just a boy with an embarrassing crush please dont look at me#niko “we have a week to reflect and enjoy what we did [win the cup] and enjoy this” mikkola#aleksander “*turning to lundy* will you have time to think about it” barkov#anton “no i wont” lundell#sasha loves putting lundy in his place any chance he gets#theyre all like cats poking their heads out the door and fighting over who gets to peak first MY TURN NO MY TURNNNN MY TURN ON SPEAKERPHONE#amazing no notes truly
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i had a long spiel about how good firefox is especially compared to chrome (or any chromium browsers) at work last week and today i got a message from a co worker who had downloaded firefox and is freaking out about how much faster and better it is <33
#last week he was like ''have they even updated it since 2010 lol lmao'' ah sweet vindication#anyways yay i love making a difference#it hasnt been that long since most ppl used firefox where i live#also making the switch to firefox is super easy. it can import all your paswords and bookmarks ans whatever if you let it#also you can restore a previous session with it#meaning that any time i open the browser on my computer i can get my dozens of tabs back with just a click#and also firefox isnt owned by someone who randomly renames places on maps and removes international women's day from their calendars etc..#leevi talks
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Swear i am in love with this man at the gym
#tf is this guy so tall for#hi alexis#hi amelia#i am in love#had to let the people know#legit 190 cm and puts his waterbottle on top of the lateral pullfown chest row pull up machine rig thing#hes at least 34#lovr#any day of the week any time or place
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Ok fuck it you know something I've never really quite understood about part of the Leftist vs Liberals debate on voting.
So so so many people act like its either-or. Like you're either dedicating your entire life to voting and promoting politicians and phone banking or whatever, or you're a True Rebel waiting for The Uprising to Come and Solve Everything.
But like. In my experience. Me voting is just me kinda go 'which person seems kinda good? Which one at least sucks the least? ok lemme go vote.' and then its anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour tops of my life. And I still have plenty of time to do Stuff and participate in Conversations about Other Important Things. And also you can admit and acknowledge and understand that the system As Is kinda sorta really sucks ass, but also still admit and acknowledge and understand that at this current point in time we are still living in the suckass system and do something to alleviate the suckass At Least A Little while also working to bolster/create/advocate for Other Systems.
I guess just like. it's not a black or white thing. Between 'top 500 volunteers for a specific politician/voting office/etc' and 'absolutely positively not voting at all' there is a gray area called 'vote and then just do other stuff'.
#out of queue#ani rambles#ani rant#now hang on its time to acknowledge my Privilege(TM)#the first few times I ever voted for anything I was in college and the student center was a voting center#so asides from waiting in a long (~30 minute tops bc early vote) line to get in I didn't have to do a big drive or anything#and at my house there's a voting center thats a like 5 minute drive from my place or a 10 minute drive depending on what election it is#and im ablebodied and have a open (read: jobless) schedule so I can Just Go for the most part#i live in a City so there's probs lots of voting centers at churches and libraries and all across town too#but like. some people act like people saying Hey Go Vote Plz are screaming like#'if you don't donate 200 dollars and 4+ weeks of your time to canvassing and calling and volunteering you are RUINING AMERICA'#when at least from what I've seen its just like. 'can you maybe go fill in a bubble on a Scantron so people like me don't Die Faster.'#also there's early voting and mail-in voting and all that jazz like yeah the current system makes it harder to vote but theres still W AYS#you don't gotta pull up at 6am on Election Day Tuesday yknow?#if i get blasted for this remember as I was: happy and rambling at 3am about greenhouses and solarpunk stuff#plz be nice i beg k bye
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#okay random story time i don't know why im narrating this or how i even stumbled upon this memory rn#but i generally do sad vents in the tags and for a change this is a funny one#so back in highschool (i say highschool but i mean junior college) i used to visit this park near my house a lot#i was an sg kid back then and the thing about parks there is that they're kinda beach-parks and they have the best cycling/running tracks#they're also really massive parks so i used to go often. sometimes bicycling. other times walking. yeah. the park was like my sanctuary#anyway. there are quite a few bike rental areas in the park and there was a cute lil shop next to this one particular rental place#and they sold like biscuits and water and icecreams and stuff and i went there a lot#and on one particular day i went there and there was this guy around my age part timing at that shop#now again this might be culture specific bc i dont see it in india but part timing in uni/pre-uni is pretty common is sg#a lot of shops and restaurants employ teenagers to twenty something ppl for part time jobs... anyway im just adding context#point is that i had walked to the park with my mum that day and she told me to go buy a couple icecreams so i went to the shop#and i saw this guy around my age and like. not to be a simp but this dude was so pretty?#like he saw someone had come to the counter so he looked up and shot a smile and i thought i got slapped by sunlight#i could spend the next several lines going on about his pretty tan skin and his glowing raven eyes but this is pathetic enough so ill stop#anyway he saw me and smiled really wide (customer service smile- i thought to myself) and i smiled back and asked for icecreams or whatever#and then this guy started getting chatty right. so he was all 'you come here (to the park) often right? ive seen you with your bike a lot'#see now. the problem with me is that i always think im bothering people. this poor dude was attempting to make conversation#and i was replying with one word answers#and i wasn't even realizing that he didnt want that. bc he kept asking more questions and i. kept. shutting them down.#then when he gave me the icecream he was all 'are you here alone? icecream alone is no fun... i could keep you company if you want..?'#which. he was being really cute about right. but because im so fucking dense i was all 'oh no i came with my mom actually'#and he went 'aw man' in this really cute but faux sad way which i didnt understand at the time and i left and then#after three full fucking days. i realized this man was tryna hit on me?#and then i went to the park like a week later and he was gone. poof. i even thought of asking the uncle in charge of that place#then i got too embarrassed and chickened out#yeah so turns out my neurodivergence neutralizes any sort of rizz that comes my way#i could've been chilling with a cute boyf rn but no😩 this is my destiny#megumi in the tags
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v theee [boring car selling in nc details] theee to junk ur car the company wanted me to go ahead and sign the title and leave the buyer info blank which is having an open title (bc if u drop it on the way to sell ur car anyone can pick it up and fill in their info and own ur car) and is like. STUPID illegal in nc. like people still do it esp in just third party-to-third party sales. and junker services do it so if they can sell the car again they dont have to deal with two transactions of paperwork and fees [<- which is why its illegal so nc can capture those fees]. but like. they shouldnt be able to tell me on their publically available site that they want me to break nc law
and also nc law wants me to get that title notarized which because of open titles being illegal. most notaries wont notarize u if the buyer isnt also there filling in their info.
most notaries are also. either like banks or other m-f 9-5 type businesses. or just some random person in their house. and random person in their house is more likely to break the law for me but i dont want to ask some random person to break the law for me
(the dmv will also notarize and anecdotally from reddit some of them totally will just shrug and let u do it with only you the seller/you the buyer there instead of needing both but thats arbitrary depends on getting someone who doesnt care lol)
AND also. even if im selling to a person not trying to get me to break the law just buying my car regular. and i work m-f 9-5 or we both work hours where theres no way to get us both in the same place and certainly not a bank or a dmv except like, sunday evening, when no banks or dmvs are open.
do we just go fuck ourselves????????? like what do they want. they want me to die?????? i think my government wants me to die and sterilize myself
#i think my government wants me to go fuck myself and die in a fire kjhskjfgj#^ also theres a whole thing ive been separately running into w me and my roomie and my coworker all having Encounters w the dmv#and learning how theyve gutted that department bad styles since the last time any of us had to interact with that for license/title shit#like christ theres just no way to get INTO those places anymore. cuz they understaff and staff with only temp workers and then run#those temp workers badly. theres just no way to get in to get your license/renew it anymore without camping out on the site#every day to snipe an open appointment in a town an hour away three months from now (as far out as theyll book you)#or camping out in your actual building at 6 am and hoping they can maybe get to you as a walk-in at some point that day and probably not#bc 50 other ppl had the same idea. so have fun doing that for a week#and its like WOW I WONDER IF ANY OF THESE CHANGES HAPPENED AFTER THEY STARTED REQUIRING PHOTO ID TO VOTE#THAT IT SUDDENLY BECAME IMPOSSIBLE TO GET PHOTO ID. bc dmv also handles the non-drivers license version too im p sure
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I'm getting to the end of my line over here.
#LIKE I KNOW. BUT ALSO. LIKE. IT HAPPENED WITH EVERYONE SO MAYBE.#like being left on read is okay im fine with that#im also fine with not being messaged for a few days bc I well know life can get busy and overwhelming so ita totally fine#but being left on read consistently. being not messaged for weeks. BY EVERYONE.#please if im doing or saying something wrong i need to know bc ill stop or change bc please i want my firends to want to talk to me#i want my firends to see something and think of me and tell me about it#i want them to listen to a song and send me a link or watch a show i reccomend and give me a script of their reactions#i feel like im giving and not getting a lot back and i want to know what im doing wrong#and if im giving too much i also want to know it bc then ill back off or stop#bc i get so excited when i see ive got messages or asks from my friends and id like to think they feel the same about me#but from my end it doesnt feel like that#i went mia for four days. i touched nothing. reblogged nothing. gave no sign i even existed anymore. and i got one dm the whole time#i love tumblr but its feeling less and less like i have any place here at all let alone on any other socials
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#manectric#i woke up at like noon today y'all i'm queuing this after work. i forgot about it all day and i was about to hop on totk#but i got the reminder to do it. so here i am. with manectric#el woowoo‚ if you will#a lot happened. yesterday. it was not a very good day. which is why i woke up so late. it was a little bit rough. but i guess it's a new day#so. it'll get better. planning on Not Doing Shit today or tomorrow to compensate for all the Bullshit that happened yesterday#hoping you all are doing well. one week from today (friday june sixteenth) i'll be hopping on a flight for the first time in 10 years#looks like according to the queue this will actually go up the day before we leave. so‚ to you guys‚ i'll be heading out tomorrow#which is scary a little bit. last time i flew i had no idea i was autistic‚ but now that i've come up with a lot of better accommodations#for myself and i understand myself a lot better and my needs‚ i'm realizing a lot of my accommodations just aren't gonna make it through TSA#plus it's a lot of unfamilarity with unfamiliar people and an unfamiliar environment which i feel like is gonna lend itself to sensory#overload like Immediately and i'm probably gonna get a headache bc that's how it manifests for me#so when we get there i'm probably gonna have to run to the nearest pharmacy. and grab some shit. which is annoying! so. i'm a little#worried. about the trip. NONE OF HTIS IS ABOUT MANECTRIC SORRY#this is a pokémon i have a hard time caring about outside of its involvement as the leader of the electrike in amp plains#that's about it#any tips from frequent flyers who are autistic would be greatly appreciated. not even just about flying but about like. going to unfamiliar#places on the other end of the country and stuff. i feel like that's what i'm most worried about even though i'm worried abt all of it#also hi i'm writing these tags from day-of. like the actual day this is going to post. me from a week ago sure did know what she was talking#about! anyway. i'm. gonna like. take my meds now goodBye see you all when this Posts in a few hours
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Apparently I have access to a semi local one…
#admittedly I wouldn’t even try to go to the next one bc I have SO MUCH going on that week and if I do anything on that day Im going to apply#for markets and such.#and the thing is that right now is a bad time bc I REALLY want to be someone’s bunny but emotionally I’m in a weird place#HOWEVER it’s something I’ve always been interested in#shatters’ fragments#polls#so perhaps something to do hopefully this year depending on when the next sessions are held?#shatters’ polls#like as clarification: it’s a 101 class before you can take any other classes#so it’s not. doing much of anything yet.#but. hmmm#(chances are if the timing works out in the future such that I can attend I will try to)
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used to have a paid hour for lunch but I guess my job is really trying to get rid of its best workers 🙃
#rambles#and by paid lunch I mean I was a full time worker and my pay stubs for 2 weeks only paid for 70 hours instead of 80#so not a paid lunch per se but now my pay stubs say 80 hours#you may ask did my pay increase? No! Bc why would it???#UGH it is so hard finding any work that I'm able to do but Jesus fucking christ#me not getting that new job in September was one of the worst things that happened to me last year#and the only reason I didn't get it was bc someone internally applied at the last second:(((#will always be the one that got away#sorry for ranting (not really) but im so angry right now holy shit#every day I find it harder to just not quit this place#tryna make me a jack of all trades (I'm trained in like 8 different areas man) but the pay??? Abysmal#I need a remote job with flexibility bc of my health issues so this is what I got#but I desperately want something better#I understand why so many of my coworkers are gone lmaooooo
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Did driving practice today. Actually did parallel parking practice this time, even tho I really didn't want to still. Finally got it into my head that I can maybe do this.
SO......
I have scheduled my driving test. For November 13th, 3 weeks from today.
#speculation nation#IM SO NERVOUSSSSS but i need to do it. i need to. worst case scenario i fail and have to try again another day.#i was actually gonna try to schedule for a week from today but they were full up for the next 2 weeks.#so. 3 weeks! my therapist is gonna be happy for me when i tell her haha#this is. something ive been avoiding for over 10 years now. but i decided at the start of this year that This would be my year.#Year Of Unfuck My Life. and im finally doing it. im going to finally get my license.#it's so. huge actually. a similar level of Holy Shit factor as me graduating.#which seems like an uneven comparison but honestly ive just been so so so scared of this driving test#an insurmountable obstacle bc i was stuck at school away from family to help me practice etc etc#very tied up with me being stuck at school for so long actually. the neverending purgatory of being Stuck In Place.#but my cousin lives closer to me now and hes been helping me out. and i am so very grateful.#augh augh augh augh. life is so busy and it feels like everything is happening at once AAAAAAAAAAAA#but im taking it all in stride. i am. oh god i might have to just practice and then take my audition video all on the same day.#bc i am too tired to deal with it rn and i have an exam tomorrow so idk if i can practice then. also i have to clean.#i will make it work. i will make something work. for the love of fucking god i will make it work.#no time to write barely any time to relax but thats okay i am Go Go Going and trying to keep enough time to sleep#(prior few nights being the..exception lol.)#i certainly wouldnt want to live this way for too long. but just a few more months. i can do it.#next semester hopefully wont be as busy. i'll have 3 hard classes but if im lucky they wont even have much homework.#i can do it. i can get through it. i will get my license in 3 weeks (manifesting) and i will get my own car.#i will find a new apartment to live in. i will Hopefully find a job.#within a year my life is going to be much much different.#my life is Already much much different than it was just a year ago. tho this year has been more... metamorphosis.#in a year's time. i will be 28 years old. and the pieces will Finally be falling into place (hopefully!!!!!)#for now. god i need to rest. will probably go to sleep early tonight. need to be rested for my exam tomorrow.#first tho i gotta shower and feed both me and the cats. yes.
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love watching weather science videos but like. why am i 1000x more interested in tornadoes over hurricanes. they're both spinning air
#we wanted to be a stormchaser when we were younger#nowadays we have to worry about our health too much to have such a risky high-stress high reaction time job#been watching nothing but tornado history videos for days it's one of our intermittent special interests#stemming from the weather science workbook we OBSESSED over as a kid#would read that thing cover to cover multiple times a week. i was the kind of autistic who would read the Encyclopedia for fun#i actually had a fave encyclopedia entry as a kid and now i cannot fucking remember it 😭#i also learned what sex was through the encyclopedia 😭😭😭😭 was legit my first exposure to the concept#but like even though we watch A TON of weather videos including tons of stuff about thunderstorms and blizzards#(thunderstorms my fucking beloved. favourite weather pattern ever. cumulonimbus my bestest friend <3)#most of the videos we watch are mostly tornado videos. and hurricane videos feel boring to us#even though hurricanes are wayyy more powerful#tornadoes are still fucking powerful it's just more. concentrated#tornadoes to me feel Targeted like. that's weather that says Fuck YOU in particular actually#especially multivortex tornadoes where you can literally have two houses both in the middle of the storm at once#and still only one of them gets destroyed#or like pictures you can see of demolished houses with their mailbox in the yard simply untouched#i like to watch tornado videos bc they help me. prepare. just in case#our state gets hit with tornadoes pretty frequently though not as much as tornado alley#and i like to know all the information for sheltering and what to do in the event of a collapsed building and such#i have a little survival kit in the bathroom just in case with like basic first aid and a radio and bottled water#bc thats probably the safest room for me to be in since it's not near any external walls and also hiding in the tub is usually good#also in the event you're caught on the road during a tornado#DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE shelter under a bridge or overpass#those work basically like straws where as the air gets pushed through it goes MUCH faster and gets dangerous way easier#as far as im aware the best place to be is in a ditch or hole if you absolutely cannot find a shelter in time#if you do not have a car with roll protection then being in your car will probably be worse#NOT AN EXPERT THO pls verify this information on your own if you think it is relevant or necessary i have poor memory and can be stupid#i just know that overpasses are dangerous as hell
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