#and then figure out how tf am i gonna write some of this

[wishchip106]

my brain locked onto my ready player one cherik au and now it wont let go

i started a draft for the first chapter im actually writing it help

HOW DO PEOPLE DO THIS

literally sweating what is this

how do people world build i’ve always struggled with that yet i really want to describe the visuals from my brain

they only way i’m gonna learn is if i do it damn 😭

i already got a main idea of how i want this to go JUST HOW DO I WRITE IT

i haven’t done creative writing in a while i gotta oil the hinges or something

at least this is just a draft i can keep going back and change it 🤯

i wanna share more thoughts about it but i feel like that would just spoil it in some way

also i aint gatekeeping this idea i wanna see what other people think of it

and then steal their ideas 😎 (jk)

[i-cant-sing]

I'm not sure what I want to write about but I have this very overwhelmingly strong urge to write about Platonic Yandere Gojo Saturo x teen/adult reader. And not like just light fluff, I'm talking about unhinged yandere Gojo- the one from the latest panels where he was fighting with Sukuna- that Gojo.

Like that Gojo just radiates "buffed up cool dad finally puts his foot down and is now actually low key scary".

Hmm, I mean I could see unhinged Shibuya arc Gojo just going absolutely feral as he drags you away from Toji (your dad) and begins to actively kill him, no matter how much you beg and grovel to spare your father's life. How you can't bare to see your dad taken from you again.

But Gojo? Nah, he doesn't care. He was serious when he took you in (kidnapped u from Naoya/Zenin Clan) and told u that he'll be the father you need.

And he doesn't even have any qualms about knocking you out either, he doesn't need u interfering mid battle and getting injured in the process. He might even hand u over to Yuta and others and cheerfully threaten them to keep you safe while he obliterates Toji, because yes Gojo is 100000% jealous of Toji and you bonding/being closer to each other than u are with Gojo. How fucing dare you??? Does he need to do the speech again?

"Through heavens and earth, I alone am tge honored one" or whatever 🙄🙄🙄

OR OR OR

Listen to me- Romantic yandere UNHINGED Gojo with reader who'd been selected by his clan, trained and raised by them for you to be Gojo's bride. Obviously, growing up Gojo was like "yeahhh, you're not good enough for me" and well treated her like absolute trash (he insulted her) which them lead the clan to be even more harsh on you because why the hell are you still not able to seduce Gojo????? So, basically poor reader is just being absolutely miserable throughout her life until one day the Gojo Clan is finally like "Alright, we gave it our best and Saturo still doesn't like u, so you can work as a maid in our house" and like instantaneously her life turns much better now that she doesn't have the pressure to be the trophy wife/heir producer for Gojo, and reader now can even leave the house to run errands.

But then Gojo notices that there is one less person who was constantly fawning over him, vying for his attention, and he's trying to figure it out who it is when he realises its you! And when he asks his clan about you, they tell him that they demoted u to a servant instead of future Mrs Gojo and Saturo is like "hm. Okay." And it doesn't exactly hit him how much this affected him until he saw you giggling away with some man.

He doesn't react immeadiately, still treating you like you're just nonexistent to him, but deep down, it eats him up the way you were touching that man's arm, the way you looked at him like he hung the stars for you.

Why tf weren't you like this with him?

Whatever. You're just... so beneath him. Why even bother thinking about you?

And then Shibuya arc happens. This man gets trapped in the prison realm and most of his thoughts are occupied by you, and how after be defeats Sukuna and the gang, he's gonna date you and you'll be touching his arm, looking at him with goo goo eyes.

Except when he comes out, for whatever fucking reason, you're fucking clinging onto some guys shoulders, acting like you're a damsel in distress, and if things weren't worse before, they certainly were when you kissed the man in front of him (okay but like u didn't know Gojo was watching u two. Like you were with your man in alley, kissing and hugging each ither lovingly after just barely escaping death from curses and then mf Gojo is just hovering in the sky above you)

Of course, now it's instantaneous death for your man, and then Gojo is just dragging you screaming and crying, and you're like "WHY? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME??" And Gojo very cheerfully tells you, as if he still wasn't covered in blood from your man-

"I don't want my wife-to-be cheating on me."

Like whoa! Where tf did that came from???? And you're all like "What are u talking about??? Your clan ended our relationship- if you could even call it that?? Besides, you're the one who always said that we're not compatible because I'm beneath you."

And Gojo doesn't even bat an eye, as he goes "doesn't matter. You were born for me. You were made for me to marry, play with, discard, do as I please. So don't you ever even look at another man again, or I will be the one to rip your eyes out." And you know that he's capable of doing that after u just witnessed the live demonstration of your man being murdered.

Anyways, jealous Gojo, be it romantic or platonic, is dangerous unhinged Gojo.

Look at him, the tiny waist, the Toji Fushiguro fit.

[latay7]

hiihii!! could you write either lance/orter/carpaccio/rayne getting slightly jealous because the reader looks like they were bering courted by a guy, but turns out they were asking that guy for advice to help the reader to confess to character,,,thankyou:3

*ੈ✩‧₊˚WHY HELLO HELLOOO!!*ੈ✩‧₊˚

First of all thank you so much for your ask ><♡♡ and i will try my best since this is my first fanfic/headcannon , so i hope you like it ✨️(and i hope i wrote what u wanted bcz i can get a bit dumb)

A misunderstanding..?

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥Char : Lance crown , Orter Madl x fem!reader

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥genre : fluff

Note : reader appearence , prefrence , dorm , is up to ur imagination (wanted to be inclusive TvT) and god is this too long and it took me a while

Note 2 : im sorry this turned out to be bad , it's late at night and idk wtf am i , (english is not my first language btw)

☆ Lance crown

You were an ordinary student at Easton Academy , you had your friends and lived your life , diffrent classes and sessions here and there and tried your best !

Although Easton's Curriculum makes every student busy with a full schedule , you're thankful that you get the time to hang out with your friends...Adler's most famous idiots students!! They were all so nice and fun so you had a lovely time with them.

You enjoy their company to the point where you squeeze your schedule to be with them which had a certain outcome....you developed a big small crush on the blue haired one and only , Lance crown!!(lance stroll lol)

You found his dedication and hard work for the sake of his sister Anna adorable , his love for her might go too much sometimes but- it doesn't matter , it proved how much of a sweetheart he is , which made you live him even more.

And now...you found yourself in a dilemma , how are you gonna confess your feelings to him?? THE Lance crown , who never looks like he seeks love..

You excused yourself with Finn to talk privately

Since he's technically the sanest in the group....

So , here we are in this moment.

You were with Finn outside his dorm behind a close corner ,and Lance noticed your dissappearence for a while so decided to check up on you.

"You see Finn , i've had this thing for a long time now , and it's just unexplainable.."

"Don't worry (Y/N) , I understand , but how can i help you out"

At this moment , you could feel your face heating up a bit , it's natural after all you're talking about a CRUSH.

"So i just wanted to get some advice from you since you guys meet a lot more than i do with him , how should i tell him a-and what if he doesn't like me back ,i mean he doesn't really show any interest in me-" at this point you started to ramble , and to calm you down , Finn held your hands in his as he tries to convince you that it's gonna be alright. Meanwhile...

Lance was watching , but he didn't hear anything...so he just saw how you acted but he didn't want to jump to conclusions.

'Was i too late..?' He can't shake off the stinging feeling in his chest , he was hurt , yet somehow mad or even perhaps...jealous?

After a while

It was after hours so you rushed back to your room after saying goodbye to your friends. And while you try to sneak your way through Easton's halls you see a figure you know , it was....Lance?? What was he doing here?

"Lance...? Why are here?"

"Oh there you are..you see...i wanted to talk.." this was concerning

"Oh...really ?..me too"

"I...."

The next words were DEFENTLY unexpected for you , i mean , sure he was nice towards you but you didn't want to be delusional so this was a shock....

But of course , with the shock comes the joy.

"...and i don't want to make things awkward because i knew you and F- why are smiling like that..."

A sigh leaves your mouth with a slight chuckle....apparently he was an idiot as well , so you decided to take a brave move.

"What are you-"

*kiss*

His shocked flustered expression is to DIE for.

"Just a misunderstanding ehe...." you smile.

☆Orter ( at this point tf am i doing)

As a devine visionary yourself , you have many responsobilites and missions to take , paperwork to do , and meetings to attend.

Thus , after your were finally chosen as the devine visionary yourself because of your hard work , you had to meet up with the other visionaries and work under them , including Orter Madl.

You've tried your best to leave a good impression on them because you were quite nervous , obviously.

You could say you were able to get close to some of the visionaries by being attentive and a fast learner , you were trying your best !

Seemingly except....Orter.

Despite your big efforts in helping him in paperwork , doing good on most of the missions you were went on , being so nice and respectful to him , he seemed like he didn't care , he declined everything.

And it DEFENETLY didn't help with the crush you developed on him. You found him elegant , hardworking , and most defently handsome (im screaming in the bus rn dude) despite him being emotionally constipated. (wtf am i saying)

So you decided to ask for help.

Here you are , in Ryoh Grantz' office , asking him what you should do considering he is married and all.

"Im sorry if this meeting is a nuisance Mr Ryoh but you were the only one i could ask for help.." a drop of sweat as you speak sheepishly.

" oh don't worry about it , you've been helping me out a lot recently so it's only fair if i return the favour , and besides , it is a good opportunity to .....distress" he says in a cheerful tone , he liked you , otherwise you wouldn't have been drinking tea in his office " and just Ryoh is fine ,now tell me , what's wrong?"

You tell him your issue as your embarrasment grows even further , i mean , that's not just ANY matter to speak about , However , you manage to go through the entire thing.

He hums in understanding "i see i see , well i have to agree with you on his emotional constipation , he doesn't even show his brother any emotions either"

Your chest starts to feel heavier as you sweat comically , "but don't worry about it , i mean , if i was to be really honest with you and if we talk in terms of emotions...."

Righ then and there , a certain someone was passing by as he heard only a part of the conversation , he got curious but he couldn't make out...everything...

Only a few words....

Emotions , confessing , feelingsa and...Kaldo??!

What in the.....he knew Ryoh was married and....does that mean he's helping you confess to Kaldo ??

Orter Madl , despite his stoic face and cold ruthless demeanor , had a soft spot for you , he felt somthing for you , he tried to show it by being less mean to you compared to others, and taking some paperwork of yours to finish himself , as well as doing what he can so you take the easiest missions , but it seems like it wasn't that obvious...

He knew you and Kaldo were on good terms but to the point where his thoughts led to thinking...you ? And-

No , he refused to believe it.

"So yes , Kaldo could be someone good to ask since these two are quite together at a lot of times-"

Knock knock , Orter entered the office in the middle of your talk.

"O-oh hi-"

"If you'll excuse me Ryoh , i need to talk to (Y/N)" And Ryoh accepts nevously -because his appearence was very unexpected- and lets you leave.

You and Orter are now walking through the hall of the building because you're following him to god knows where. Until you reach a private area where you two could talk.

"You didn't tell me why are we-"

"What do you have of feelings for Kaldo?"

"Huh"...was the only word that came out of your mouth , Dumbfounded was the least you could think of to describe yourself right now.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me , now answer me , what are the feelings you have for him"

"Wait a min-"

Realization never hit you this hard , so you started laughing as he watches confused , why are you laughing.

"Ok here's the whole thing mister eavsdropper..."

.

.

That ended well , for both parties , Ryoh bless your soul.

[two-sibyls-tall]

I bullet-point planned out a batfam fanfic aWHILE ago but I am Bad At Writing full-fledged stories so I’m going to just throw it out in the open here in the hopes that ya’ll will appreciate it, and also that mayhaps someone else who is Good At Writing will find it and make it.

So. Here’s my take on a Reverse!Robins Dimensional Travel fic.

Damian:

Starts off with Robin!Damian seeing a black-robed uniform that’s awfully similar to the League of Assassins gear. Which is. Worrying. to see in Gotham.

Robin!Damian sneaks up on him to figure out wtf he’s doing.

Nightwing!Damian, aka the black-robed figure, calls him out. Possibly even makes an offhanded joke about how R!Damian shouldn’t be wearing bright ass colors if he didn’t want to be seen.

R!Damian catches sight of the Nightwing logo on N!Damian’s chest and proceeds to demand who he is

N!Damian recognizes R!Damin’s pattern of speech and essentially goes “oh fuck”. Reveals himself as Nightwing, aka Damian Wayne.

R!Damian immediately thinks of the Heretic. He calls for backup in code via comm link.

N!Damian is on the same comm channel, so he hears the responses to the code even if he doesn’t recognize the code itself. He’s semi-annoyed and starts running

R!Damian is IN PURSUIT.

N!Damian gets yoinked back to hid own dimension

R!Damian meets up with Nightwing!Dick and says something along the lines of “the assailant disappeared but who tf was that.”

Jason:

It’s a couple days later now.

Red Robin!Tim has already started working on a multiverse-type theory and let Red Hood!Jason know, so honestly RH!Jason isn’t terribly surprised when he comes across a vaguely familiar vigilante beating the shit out of a criminal in Crime Alley.

New vigilante introduces himself as Redbird

RH!Jason goes across comms to ask Tim how tf he should be handling this shit?

Redbird visibly freezes up when RR! does the classic “no names in the field” chastise

RH!Jason straight up asks Redbird if he can hear the comms bc who needs to be subtle.

When Redbird confirms, he just sorta sighs and gives a code to O. There’s a bit of yelling while the team processes the possibility of compromised comms.

It calms down again, and RR!Tim is like “okay the evidence is pretty clear here if you ask me,, Redbird I think you’re from another dimension. Do you recognize any of us?”

Redbird is like “well I’ve only actually caught one of your guys’s names so far, but yes I. Know. a Tim. He doesnt sound like you anymore, though”

RH!Jason is like ‘hmm we’re gonna put a pin in that one for now’

Meanwhile RR!Tim is talking to Redbird about going to the batcave and also maybe running some tests to figure out where they’re coming from and what’s going on here

Redbird shrugs and mentions that this whole situation sorta seems like what his brother was talking about a few seconds before he jumped dimensions.

“Is your brother Damian Wayne, aka Nightwing?”

“Fuck. Yeah, that’s him.”

At this point RH!Jason connects the dots an goes “ah shit, you’re me aren’t you.”

Redbird!Jason gives the most dramatic eye-roll possible and is like “bro we went from Redbird to Red Hood? That’s so lame. Why’d we even change it.”

RH!Jason just looks at him. “No dude we went from Robin to Red Hood. because we died.”

“NEWS TO ME???”

They've been heading to the batcave during this conversation

They walk in and RR!Tim's already there and he's like "Jason stop freaking out mini you this is clearly a different universe he might not even die."

Redbird!Jason is completely frozen staring at (unmasked) Tim and just kinda whispers "Tim?" And then he gets yoinked back to his universe.

Tim and Jason look at each other and Jason's like "so that's definitely not a good sign for what happened to you in their universe, right?"

Dick:

Nightwing!Dick is in the Batcave w/ most of the family discussing the dimension travel shit when he suddenly feels like he's being watched

He puts the meeting on pause and the feeling increases and he just looks straight up and sees golden eyes staring at him from the rafters

The other Batfamily members in attendance also look up and go what !! the fuck !!

NW!Dick knows about the whole 'Haly's circus being a theoretical breeding ground for the Court of Owls' thing bc I said so, so he already feels like he knows whats goin on

before anyone can say anything he just clears his throat and says "Gray Son?"

Batfamily freezes in shock and the small child w/ gold eyes just tilts his head in recognition and then jumps down from the rafters w/ no hesitation

He lands right next to NW!Dick and stands at attention, and Dick kinda feels sick bc Talon!Dick is like 8 years old

NW!Dick looks at the batfamily and makes some joke of like "haha looks like it’s my turn for the alternate dimension encounter"

RR!Tim is already taking notes

Bruce's put it all together and he's like "fuck. Little you is a Talon."

Cue the batfamily losing their shit again

Talon!DIck is looking between all of them confused, and he notices Damian just deadlock staring at him, and he's like Oh!! I know this one !!! so he stares back

RR!Tim is like "okay fantastic, well between Talon and Nightwing!Damian I think I can confidently guess by now that their dimension is one where all of our ages are reversed. Hey Talon do u wanna confirm that."

Talon is Very Helpful and nods, and Nightwing!Dick is like "alright buddy do you wanna tell us about ur dimension"

Except Talon doesnt really talk but !! he does sign!! his big sister cass has been teaching him sign !!

NW!Dick is like “thats great!! I know sign!!” and he starts relaying info to RR!Tim so he can take notes while Talon talks

Talon tells him that Tim From His Universe (and Dick isnt going to unpack yet why Tim’s namesign is a T drawn in the shape of a smile) has also put together that they’re going to a different universe

He says there was a case that the 4 nightshift batboys were on (girls were working a different case, Batman is offworld) w Oracle leading ofc that was selling alien technology

he says the 4 nightshift batboys were hit w a beam that didnt seem to do anything, but Tim of His Universe thinks that beam just had a slower affect and is what’s causing this

He says his big brother damian was the first to just randomly disappear mid mission and it gave Talon a scare bc they were together at the time, so he just froze and waited for damian to come back

and when Damian did, he immediately relayed what happened over comms, and a couple seconds later Redbird wasnt responding either

at this point RR!Tim interrupts and is like “are u saying urs all happened the same day? bc its been like a couple weeks since NW!Damian came here and several days since Redbird”

Talon just kinda shrugs and is like “well keep an eye out for Tim Of My Universe next bc he was hit too”

At this point NW!Tim is like “hey bud. why u. Why u using that name sign for Tim?”

Talon’s is about to respond when he gets yoinked back to his universe as well

Tim gives a mildly hysterical laugh and is like “well that’s not foreboding at all!!!”

Tim:

RR!Tim doesnt actually notice when JJ!Tim comes in this universe, bc at this point JJ!Tim has figured it out as well and is like “alright well the kid hasnt been jokerized so why traumatize him if I dont have to”

but unfortunately JJ!Tim IS spotted by a random passerby who mistakes him for the Joker so the whole batfamily’s out soon anyway looking for him

Hood finds JJ!Tim first and is like “alright i got eyes on him and im in pursuit,, hes kinda dressed weird tho wtf”

JJ!Tim hears this over comms and is like ‘welp now or never’ so he talks over the comms too (while running from Hood) and is like “hey I might be in the wrong universe, any way I could talk to one Tim Drake”

RR!Tim is like “Fuck dude really. rn? with a joker breakout? this is a bad time”

JJ!Tim responds w like “ur telling me, dude, Im the one being chased by a homicidal maniac w a red bucket on his head”

“YOU’RE THE GUY DRESSED LIKE THE JOKER?”

“THE JOKER IS STILL ALIVE HERE?”

JJ!Tim does NOT take this news well and he stops running, Hood catches up but doesnt engage bc ur telling me this is Tim?? this is RR?? tf happened?? but he does relay over comms that JJ is laughing and it is freaking him tf out bc he sounds EXACTLY like the Joker so SOMEONE get over here before Jason goes full Pit Rage

RR!Tim does arrive and immediately recognizes his own features despite the green hair and green eyes and bleached skin and Absolutely Terrifying Smile what the FUCK happened

JJ calms down just enough to be like “Oh I get it. This universe is age reversal so it also changed who the Joker got, too”

Hood looks like hes about to be sick, Tim’s not far behind

JJ’s like “great! well I’m Joker Junior, occasionally known as Tim Drake, and in my universe I was brainwashed by the Joker, then killed him and myself!! but apaprently the universe wasnt a fan of that because then I woke up in an UNMARKED GRAVE and wandered around for awhile, got dunked in a lazarus pit, and am overall having a terrible time”

At this point NW!Dick and Robin!Damian are here too and they’re like jfc dude

JJ looks down at his wrist like theres a watch there (there’s not) and is like “alright well according to my calculations, I shouldnt be here much longer, since most of my time was spent hiding & then running from ya’ll in order to NOT have this confrontation but look how well that worked out. Anyway u guys should kill the joker,, who knows if he might get inspiration from my universe and torture little timmy over there,, anyway ta ta” and then he fuckin disappears

Red Hood is like “yep ok im gonna go murder a clown” and no one really moves to go stop him

[onnoffwrites]

I have been losing my shit over this damn panel for the past THREE DAYS (more or less) and I need to yell somewhere so it's gonna go here.

It all began when I was writing my fic (I think this was for My Immortal), and I needed to recap significant hakukai moments. And I remembered "hey, I should include this one thing saguru said during sunset manor that was stupidly super gay for no fucking reason" bc like, yea hakukai not canon, but if canon was gonna give me a whole ass confession then I might as well use it. So, like always, I head to mangadex to look for this panel... Except... It's not there... The line... The line's not there... But I remember... I remember something about "the only one to disrupt/disturb my thinking/mind"... Where... I didn't imagine that right? I mean I read a lot of google translated Chinese fanfics but... I REMEMBERED reading that line... In a manga... In English... ON mangadex...

This is where I should mentioned, that if you weren't around for the Great Collapse of Mangadex. Then... Well, so there was this period of time where mangadex just DIDNT EXIST. Bc there was some cyber?? Attack??? On the site??? I can't fully remember. But it like wiped out most of the site. The mangas r just, gone. So mangadex fixed it. It took a while bc they figured "might as well revamp our site and system". And they did. And it's great. And it looks beautiful now, even more than before.

But see. The line I remembered? Yea... Yea that was from before The Collapse. And mangadex let multiple translation groups submit their translations. So u can read diff translations of diff group, see how things are interpreted differently... And... I remembered this one, that I posted here up top, but I remembered there was another. One that had The Line.

And it was driving crazy so, like usual, I asked my cn friend. But my cn friend (why am I still saying that, it's @beingvv , that's the friend) has A Life, and isn't always online, and we love that for ppl. So. I'm still crazy. I can't trust my own damn mind and memory bc why tf do I remember something that isn't there (happened before btw, but that has nothing to do with this).

Luckily, I have a friend who knows jp. UNLUCKILY, I don't have the jp raws and it's from chapter 300 and we are in the thousands. So, I went back to losing my mind. Until I found it again, and realized. Heyyyyyyy there's a whole ass ANIME. So like the baggage my dear friend had the misfortune to be saddled with, I went to find the ep, timestamped it, yelled begged them for help.

This is where I lose my damn mind the first time in the recent weeks.

(thank you my dear piglet, u don't even go here but u tolerate my insanity)

THIS. THIS WAS THE LINE. THATS WHAT I REMEMBERED.

So, I feel a little more sane (bc my mind didn't fabricate a memory again) and also A LOT more insane bc WHY WOULD U SAY THAT, HAKUBA SAGURU 😭😭😭 WHY WOULD U SAY IT LIKE THAT 😭😭😭

In any case I feel validated. Told beingvv about my discoveries (for whenever they come back) not that they need it cn fandom already got the correct translation. And finished writing my fic.

And then Saguru's comeback was announced.

So I've been losing my shit for 3 days on twitter, looking at all my fave KR and JP accounts and the things they say.

And then someone dug up and old tweet thread that talked about this panel. Specifically, op talked about the nuance in the word choice used.

Here's the og thread if anyone wants to read or Google translate it urself.

(mkppyong my love, bless you)

Bc mkppyong talked to a jp acquaintance about ??? Uh I dunno just language I guess. POINT IS. They pointed out that gosho used specific words/phrases that really wasn't needed if all he wanted to say was "the only one who drives me crazy/mad." But he did used them. It's specifically "his thoughts/mind" that's being driven crazy. And that if he wants to just talk about Saguru's mind being disrupted/confused, then there's rly no need to use the words "go crazy"

And then they wrote out a whole symbolism about clocks and saguru and being broken down/disrupted and I lost my shit over the clock symbolism, sue me 😭😭😭

I don't think I'm making sense anymore bUT WAIT, THERES MORE, THE FINAL BLOW

THE THAI TRANSLATION

This is where I expose myself more than I ever want to, but here's a fact. I'm thai

Here's a second fact. I'm SHIT at Thai. I've been bad at this language before I got good at English. My Thais as good as an elementary student. Every time I understand difficult words I get confused bc where did I know THAT from???

In any case, point is, I saw that tweet, read the text, immediately understood it and began losing my shit all over again... And then I doubted... Bc like, I'm not good with this lang anymore... Maybe im understanding it wrong? So I look up Google.

Google: คลุ้มคลั่ง just means go crazy

So I was like, damn guess I'm wrong, read too much into this. BUT SEE BC I LIVE HERE I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARENT A DISGRACE. And so my friend said:

SO WELCOME TO MY THIRD ROUND OF INSANITY.

HAKUBA SAGURU WHY WOULD U SAY THIS SHIT IN FRONT OF LIKE NINE OTHER PPL 😭😭😭😭😭 BOY WHY R U TELLING THEM UR OBSESSED 😭😭😭 youre driving ME crazy 😭😭😭

So. Here we are. At the end. I have no idea how tf I'm supposed to end this post. I'VE been obsessed for 3 days straight. I don't have a lot of braincell left in me (there weren't any to begin with). I don't have a statement to wrap this post up in a nice little bow. Go make ur own conclusion I dunno.

But I would not have been losing my shit over this stupid panel for a month if it wasn't for the fact that eng translation was missing a pretty crutial thing in what Saguru said. I don't know if this was a mistranslation or a misunderstanding or something, but the English translation was lacking. And I love and have always been thankful and grateful to the ppl who worked hard to translate mangas in their free time, and do it all for free, bc I haven't had any real way to rent/borrow mangas from renting shops/libraries in years. So this was one of the only ways I can read mangas. But, even as I checked the raw panel with Google lens just now, even google translate it as "the only one to make my thoughts go round." No where was there any mention of "case" and "solving." So that's just, multiple accounts of ppl who knows jp, including native jp speakers, all saying that this panel is Saguru saying "the only one to drive me crazy". And man I rly hope this doesn't make me come off as ungrateful or like shitting on the translation team, I'm rly not. But yea. Uh. The translation was wrong. And I remembered that there used to be a diff eng translation. And it led me to go to all this trouble and journey to find out what was actually said. And here we are, at the end.

The only one who could disrupt Saguru's thinking.

The only one who could disturb Saguru's mind.

The one whose sole existence drives him mad.

The only one to make his mind obsess over till he's driven to madness.

Or to use the symbolism mkppyong wrote: the only one to break down the clock, the precise and accurate mechanism, that is Hakuba Saguru.

[imraespace]

HOW TO WIN HER HEART!

MAKI X FEM!READER

BIRTHDAY SPECIAL!

──────────────

Here are some special steps you took to Maki Zenin's heart!

You, a normal human being who suddenly discovered you had a big fat crush on a certain girl named Maki Zenin.

So you decided to make it you main goal to win her heart!

But how?

.

.

"YOU DIDN'T TELL ME SOONER BECAUSE..??"

-> 8:30 PM, FRIDAY.

You told your bestest friend ever, Nobara!

And currently she's gripping on your shoulders, shaking the life out of you.

"I only figured it out like this morning.." You told your friend, removing her hands off your shoulders.

You lied, kinda. You always knew you had a thing for her but you only found out today that it's indeed a crush. Like this morning when she walked in the room and you began your daily staring, not like a creep, but you always looked at her when she enters the room but that morning your heart flipped!

So here you are, in Nobara's room gossiping about your new found feelings.

"Obviously you have to confess soon."

"What. Why?"

"BECAUSE?? IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT."

She pulled you in closer then said:

"Starting tomorrow we're planning your confession."

And that's how operation: "WIN HER HEART" began.

──────────────

-> 10:01 AM, SATURDAY.

"WINNING HER HEART"

nobara: hi everyone!

megumi: what is this.

nobara: WE'RE HELPING Y/N

megumi: why

nobara: bc she's my favorite duh

yuji: what abt me ☹️

nobara: anyways WE ARW HELPING Y/N TO CONFESS TO MAKI!!

megumi: no

yuji: YES

megumi: fuck.

nobara added y/n

y/n: ooh you was fr

nobara: OFC I WAS.

──────────────

-> 01:20 PM, SATURDAY.

Still in Nobara's room, she left the room to get some snacks.

Apparently she said she's bringing over some friends because she's taking this a bit too serious but to be honest you really don't mind, you just haven't seen someone do all of this for a crush. Atleast your friend cares!

Suddenly you heard more than one footsteps walking up towards the door, it opened and you was greeted with not only her normal friends but Maki friends?

"I brought more help!" She exclaimed.

Time flew but one thing stayed still, a solid plan for winning her heart starting on Monday.

──────────────

-> 8:30AM, MONDAY.

────────

STEP 1- INUMAKI'S PLAN:

His plan is simple. He's gonna ask Maki about you and hint to her! Seems okay enough.

──────────────

Inumaki, along with Yuuta, shares the same class with Maki.

Sadly he sits right next to her. Isn't that great!?

Normally she knows he's always up to know good but this time it's reeking off him and she noticed ever since he entered the room.

"Did you bathe today?" She asked the boy.

Obviously, he was offended, even sniffed himself but noticed he smelled normal, not even close to bad.

"OF COURSE I DID.. Anyways I have a question." He said, sliding himself on her desk.

She looked up at him with an unimpressed look on her face yet nodded her head, signing him to continue talking.

"There's this girl right..." He started.

She rolled her eyes after that sentence.

"If you have a crush, go gossip to your boyfriend."

"WHAT?"

Yuuta saw it all and laughed at the situation.

"AND GET OFF MY TABLE!"

"I DIDN'T ASK YOU MY QUESTION AS YET!"

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR CRUSH."

──────────────

-> 11:29AM, MONDAY.

"WINNING HER HEART"

inumaki: bye I failed💀

nobara: HOW TF DO YOU FAIL BY ASKING HER ABT Y/N??

yuuta: she thought he had a crush

megumi: LMAO

inumaki: ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY?

inumaki: LITERALLY TRIED MY BEST.

────────

FAILED

──────────────

STEP 1- INUMAKI'S PLAN

STEP 2- NOBARA'S PLAN:

Simple! Trying the old fashioned way! Write a note and place it in her locker, surely she will meet up with you.

────────

-> 12:00PM, MONDAY.

Everyone gathered around your table, here you are, stupidly writing some cringe love letter yet blushing as you write every words, pouring your heart into it and finally ending it.

You folded it, looked up at the others and finally getting the green sign to go, but something kinds felt off about this...

Nevertheless! You all sprinted to her locker, "trying" to sneak but looked like a bunch of idiots, so you shrugged your shoulders, walked up, then placed it in.. Then ran away with the others.

A little while after, you all stood by the corner, peaking your heads out to see what she will do.

First she got whatever she needed, then noticed the very obvious note.

She looked around at first, looking back at the note then finally opening it up.

She read it and a million emotions was on her face, confusion, a hint of blush but actually mostly confusion.

Then you remembered:

"I forgot to tell her where to meet me at.."

You mumbled.

At the end of the note you had

"Hope to see you there!"

But no location..

"WHAT IF I EAT YOUR HEAD OFF Y/N"─

────────

FAILED(?)

──────────────

STEP 1- INUMAKI'S PLAN

STEP 2- NOBARA'S PLAN

STEP 3- YUJI'S PLAN:

Let's try giving her a gift! Maybe a snack. It shouldn't go so bad.

──────────────

-> 12:16 PM, MONDAY.

────────

You made your way towards the vending machine, slightly losing hope in this "operation" but got the snacks.

You got your favorite snacks actually.

Along with some drinks, and placed it in a bag, tied it and made your way towards her classroom to place it on her desk.

As you entered, luckily, she wasn't at her desk but a few students were still in here.

You ignored them.. But they didn't ignore you.

You placed her snacks on her desk, left a sticky note and left the classroom!

But where is Maki?

Roaming the school. With the note in her hand.

"What did they mean by, hope to see you there.." She mumbled as she's walking around the school, looking for atleast some hope.

RING! RING!

"Stupid ass bell.."

────────

SUCCESS!

──────────────

-> 1:09PM, MONDAY.

Maki made it back to class a while back but still she continued to stare at the bag of snacks someone left for her on her desk.

First a note now gifts?

Her eyes made it back to the note, then to the sticky note and noticed something.

The handwriting matches!

Her eyes lit up when she noticed that the same person she was looking for, was in her classroom.

Then if they entered the classroom.. atleast someone here saw them.

.

.

The teacher haven't arrived just as yet, so Maki took it as her chance to speak up.

"Did anyone saw who placed this on my desk?" She asked.

Mostly everyone shrugged their shoulders, looking around for answers but someone spoke up.

"I did! It was a girl!"

Once Maki's ears heard it, she turned to Inumaki.

"What were you telling me about this girl."

──────────────

-> 3:00PM, MONDAY.

STATUS:

INUMAKI'S PLAN- FAILED SUCESS.

NOBARA'S PLAN- FAILED(?) SUCESS.

YUJI'S PLAN- SUCESS.

────────

You, a normal human being with totally normal friends, normal feelings, suddenly felt a wave of nerves when you saw your crush speed walking behind you.

You didn't know if you should stop or speed up.

You had no choice either way when she shouted your name.

So you stopped.

And she did.

"Y/N did you do all of this..?" She asked.

You turned around, facing your fears!

Shyly, you nodded at her question then looked up at her.

She was closer this time, handing you a snacks from the snack bag you gave her.

"So, do you want to go on a date? Take this snack if yes."

You.. took the snack.

.

.

HOW TO WIN HER HEART!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MAKI!

[ghost-bison]

why i don't like moffat's writing?

with rtd we had rose and martha and donna who were all amazing and by the end of their run (especially rose's and donna's cause martha's ending was satisfactory and somehow wholesome) you were left wanting more and being sad it was already over. amy and clara both outlived their welcome (especially clara even though i very much prefer her to amy).

like idk what moffat was trying to do with the amy/rory situation cause it could have been tied up in 1 series, and as for clara... well let's just say by the end (or beginning or middle if we're being honest) he was forcing her and her regurgitated storylines (stolen from both rose and donna) down our throats like a ripe lemon.

except there was no deep foreshadowing well embedded into the storyline like with donna and rose. no. just a constant reminder of "don't worry, the doctor will figure that out at some point" by the doctor himself which is not how the doctor is supposed to work. the doctor is thick and daft and too caught up in the chaos of his life to notice anything and that's what's so good about it.

and i mean yeah, he did do some mild foreshadowing thing with amy and the silence and all (how good it actually was, it's up to you to decide i guess), but bro i'd forgotten all of it by the time we knew what was going on cause it happened over two series and they had to use a flashback i think so that people would see how clever it was.

also this exchange in forest of the dead between ten and river:

"doesn't work like that"

"it does for the doctor"

"i am the doctor"

"yeah. someday"

brother, what were you trying to pull? what's this five-year-old behaviour? "my doctor is better than your doctor" literally how old are we. what a way to tell us the writing of the future series will suck. like i'm sorry but by this point we don't know river, there is no attachment to that character, we have never seen her in our lives. we don't gaf. by this point she's just an annoying lady telling one of the most epic, well-written, consistent versions of the doctor that he is no match to a future doctor written by a dude who's not like other dudes and whose self-insert is a little too on-the-nose. as well as his misogyny. (i love eleven he was hilarious, i just think he's a victim of bad writing and inconsistency)

every tenth doctor episode written by moffat, the only recognizable thing about ten is david tennant's acting. ten goes and falls for madame de pompadour over what? her boobies? even in classic who which was peak misogyny, the doctor wasn't like that. ten spent less than five minutes with reinette and you're gonna tell me that small minute was enough to make him fall for her? half of which she was a child, moreover? sure.

we can add to that donna's "if i had a face like yours i wouldn't hide it" to miss evangelista in forest of the dead yet again. why? how tf was that necessary??? i don't remember donna ever saying anything positive or negative about her own features apart from that. that was never the point. this isn't fanfiction. or how in that same episode miss evangelista became ugly in order to become clever. there's a real fkin pattern there.

how i miss the time women in doctor who didn't need to assault their men in order to be badass. a time when the doctor would have never forcefully kissed a married lesbian and made a sex joke after she rightfully slapped him. when bisexuality was taken seriously and not as a selling point. when doctor who was still doctor who

[jennycalendar]

the way buffy is all wrongfooted nerves and hopefully looking for angel's approval when angel is literally acting like A Brick, and like there are No Thoughts In His Head, really effectively kills any possible chemistry that they could have this season. they were absolutely working for me last season because the writing was doing so much heavy lifting vis a vis angel's general emotional unavailability, but you can really really tell that the show either wants us to be team buffy and angel OR the show thinks that we are already, and it is just a baffling experience to watch this play out. like do you not know that this is absolutely charmless to watch. do you not know that season two and its messy ambiguity and its committed portrayal of buffy/angel's genuine connection existing in tandem with angel being a Shitty Older Guy who Did Shitty Things is so so much more fun than season three, which sorta sometimes dips its toe into the pool of "i guess maybe angel COULD suck" before resolutely returning to repeating, over and over, "it is sooooo hard for buffy to not date angel right now."

and i am torn too because i do think the show is on some level aware of the fact that this is not a healthy connection! buffy's isolation draws her closer to angel this season because she feels ashamed that she can still love him after everything that he did and he's the only one that understands that. i really can't argue with that. but there's also this level of, like, we're supposed to feel like it sucks that they can't be together? that i do not understand. it does not suck. we have reached a point where watching buffy dismiss her friends' concerns as "they just don't understand" is deeply uncomfortable. i can't figure out whether or not s3 wanted that uncomfortability to be intentional, and i CANNOT figure out who tf is watching s3 and going "buffy and angel 4ever." how do you watch any of this show and go "buffy and angel 4ever." they were a wonderful moment in time but this was clearly a relationship that buffy was always going to outgrow. he's her teenage fantasy. of course they're not gonna make it.

[shigarakisslutbag]

Thought that has plagued my mind (that I haven't actually brought up n rp) but imagine y/n finding out Tomura isn't his real name and after going through that mental whiplash, just genuinely asking him what he <I>wants</I> to be called.

Kinda just imagining the faces he'd make because it's not something someone would normally ask him? And him trying to figure out y ud care about something like that? Then realizing he's never thought about it either, he just did what AFO told him to and didn't consider it outside of necessity/ if it was something he actually wanted to do or not

(casual angst is underrated)

TW: angst, mentions of the bitch that is AFO, mentions and themes of lack of body autonomy

I've been meaning to get to this sooner but the last two weeks I've been pretty much unconscious bc of my new meds 😭 (legit slept 12 HOURS the other night).

Sorry for all the typos, if any, I'm on mobile lol.

Tomura would probably disregard reader for a bit. Not in a rude way, but he'd likely just shrug and give no real answer, because he has no idea how to. The thought would stick with him for a while, though.

When you're a kid, you don't really question things, because your brain isn't fully developed enough (obviously), so as kids we accept almost everything adults tell us as fact. It's actually a common tactic used by some parents to get them to behave or teach certain lessons. For example: if a parent wants the child to stop misbehaving, they use Santa or "call" Santa on their phone as a way to keep the child from doing things they aren't supposed to.

This isn't to say tomura was "lied" to necessarily, but he didn't have the maturity level to be able to make decisions like that for himself, and understand he had a choice, so when afo gave him his new name, he didn't have any objections because... why would he? He grew up with the idea that his life and body- even his name, were not his. Of course he's not going to give his real name any thought because it wasn't really on the table. Up until this point, probably hadn't even thought of his real name at all.

Now, to circle back to the original question, how would tomura react beyond this? I would say after contemplating that option, he'd also wonder why reader would care enough to ask. Why do you care about what he wants? He can't really wrap his head around it, but now that the question has been asked, and now that he knows he has the option, he'd unsurprisingly choose his real name.

I think one of the biggest reasons he'd rather use his real name, is because he doesn't want to use a name given to him by someone who tried to control him. Tomura is not really the type to like being told what to do lol. I mean he is the leader after all. You'd be the first he allow to use his real name. Eventually the other members too, but you were the first who cared enough to ask, so naturally you're the first who he'll tell what he wants to be called. It won't seem like it in his facial expressions, but hes grateful you put that thought into his mind. He won't forget that.

A/N: I love casual angst that doesn't make me wanna throw myself into incoming traffic. Am I gonna read a fic about cheating tomura or cheating reader? Absolutely tf not. Will I read or write a fic that makes me wanna cry myself to sleep bc I can't comfort said fictional character? Absolutely.

[idlingsomewhere]

hey man how's it going

(blog intro)

Hey!! Welcome to my blog. You may know me from @shiftedelsewhere which Used to be my account before tumblr nuked it. rip fallen hero. hope u have fun on here! u probably won't. but....

"girl who tf are you"

good question! I wish I knew.

I go by "N" on the internet; I use any/all pronouns; and i love music with my entire heart. Call me whatever! it really doesn't matter to me all that much.

"why are you here"

to post about my interests

"which are?"

music! mostly. my 2 favs at the moment are porter robinson and jane remover. i also really like a lot of other stuff too; you'll figure it out easily since it's the main thing I post about on here

i like a good videogame sometimes. In particular I'm especially fond of zelda games, pokemon, splatoon, and those mii games on the DS!

i do NOT watch shows very often. i can count the number of tv shows I've seen in my life on my fingers. my favourite show is gilmore girls because I'm a massive autumn fiend. living my best life rn. whenever i finish a show i tend to write down my thoughts and share them. currently, I'm trying to watch community, big brother (season 26), and am on my 5(?)th rewatch of gilmore girls.

other than that i like math and physics and transit systems and some other stuff that evades my memory right now ! we will find out what i like together, in due time..

"ok, and?"

these r some general ground rules!

feel free to dm me or chat with me in the comments, just keep in mind I'm a VEERRRRY tired stem student and can't get back to you immediately. send recs or tell me about your day or show me a meme! we can be friends if you'd like :)

uhrm don't be weird lmfao. I'm not gonna tell you where i live. probably goes without saying...

no tagging system at the moment - let me know if you need me to tag something (i.e., a tw or something) and I'll do it!

i like a good tag game. if you don't wanna be tagged, please let me know! otherwise i got an alphabetized tag game list with all my mutuals who are okay with tag games that i copypaste every time lol

"if your tumblr goes down again, where else can i pester you?"

@shadowbannedsomewhere, the backup account 😵‍💫

aoty

art instagram (dead)

porter robinson fanpage (cloutless)

pinterest

apple music (this is where i listen to stuff)

spotify (this is where i post playlists. also we should do a blend :3)

last.fm

goodreads

i readily give out my discord so just ask for it if u want to talk

i always follow back on these accounts but i do not always check. shoot me an ask if u followed me somewhere and ill follow you back obviously :3

yeah and that's all! thx for reading. they really deleted my old pinned post too..crazy. what did i do to displease the tumblr algo? i don't know >_<

[nightmaree-eyess]

Abby takes you in

Tlou fanfic

I’m writing this fic based on a dream I had and idk how tf to do this so yeah…

Smut mdni 18+ Abby butch, y/n, female reader, dom Abby, fingering, head, teasing, hickeys

Word count: 1526

Scroll down for smut. Starts at —

You were just picked up by a butch woman (she says her name is Abby) and her son (his name is lev) because your group up and left you because you were going too slow. But you’re glad you weren’t alone for that long when they found you. Ok, they might’ve left you for a couple days but they said they were coming back. You believed them till the 2nd day. Abby and lev found you on the 4th day and thank who/what ever is out there cause any longer you would’ve died. You have no supplies just a weapon and a flashlight. They say they’re looking for a group called the “fire flies”. Where ever they’re going I’ll follow cause I don’t mind the view of this woman’s ass.

We reach a farm house after a couple hours. The door seems to be jammed.

“Hey y/n help me with the door”

“You’re literally all muscle how am I gonna help you?”

Abby rolls her eyes but you see a hint of a smile

“Just get over here and help me”

We ran into the door and end up tumbling inside. You end up on top of her and you’re face blushes. It’s very noticeable. All you can think about is how soft her hair looks and how kissable her lips are. Abby looks at you. Her hands on your lower back so she took most of the fall and you see a slight blush bloom across her face.

“Can you guys get a room already? This is gross” Lev says jokingly

You scramble to your feet. Not entirely embarrassed but your face is still red hot. Abby gives you a shy smile while scratching the back of her neck. Maybe she was embarrassed but not mortified at least.

You go looking around the farm house wondering who owned it last. You go into a room upstairs and you find a desk, a guitar, some drawings of a woman and a child, and boxes everywhere. Who ever drew these had an amazing talent and you’re kinda jealous. In another room, you find that it was just used as a storage room and you’re curious as to who lived here so you rummage through their stuff.

You find a family photo and the person (you assume) behind the artwork. You read the back and it says “You’re not a burden, you’re the best thing to ever happen to me, I love you, Ellie” which ever one is Ellie must not have a way with words but she tried.

You look some more and find matching bracelets. I don’t know if it would be weird to give Abby the matching half considering we just met and these are random bracelets I found but you keep them just incase. You wanna thank her for taking you in somehow.

You guys get ready for bed and you lay awake for hours on end. You don’t know what could be making your mind race so you see if Abby is awake.

“Pst abby” you whisper

Abby groans

“Pssst abbyyyy”

“What y/n?” She says in her sexy half asleep voice

You clench your legs.

“Are you awake?”

“I am now what’s up?”

You give her a look as to say “I don’t wanna wake lev” and you guys go upstairs to talk.

You walk into the storage room upstairs and close the door behind you.

“I don’t know why I can’t sleep! I’ve been tossing and turning all night!”

“Maybe you have something on your mind you don’t know about. I mean your group just left you a couple days ago. That’s gotta fuck with your head”

Ugh you can listen to this woman talk all day. It helps that she is the most beautiful woman to ever walk in your orbit too. Her short hair faded on the sides and her piercing blue eyes. You can get lost in them.

This might be kinda weird but you figured that maybe you can’t sleep cause you have all this pent up energy you need released and maybe Abby will help.

“Maybe I can’t sleep cause I have all this pent up energy and need help getting it out” you say an octave lower

“Maybe I can help with that”

God her voice is like butter

—————————————————

She grabs your neck and pulls you into a messy kiss. All teeth and drool and you find it so exhilarating. You take each others shirts off and Abby isn’t wearing a bra.

She pushes you up against the door and ghosts the seam of your pants

She plays with your tits over your black teeshirt bra

“You gotta tell me what you want and affirmative yes’ ”

You shake your head

“I need words y/n”

“I-I want you to” you let out a breathy moan

“I want you to eat my pussy”

“That’s my girl. Wasn’t that hard now was it?”

She traces the seam of your pants with her calloused fingers. She’s taking her time just to tease you.

She kisses you and trails kisses all down your neck, your collar bone, your breast, your torso

“Is this ok?” She asks as she’s about to take my pants off

“Mhm” I manage to get out. I’m already so fucking horny and she hasn’t even started.

“Words y/n, I need full sentences”

“Yes m’ame that’s fine”

She is eye level with your pussy and unbuttoning your pants. She looks up at you with hunger in her eyes. God she looks ethereal from this angle.

She takes your lace thong in her teeth and slowly slides them off you. Damn this girl loves to tease. You can smell your heat from here and it’s driving her crazy.

“You looks so gorgeous from down here princess”

You almost came just from those words alone

She dives in, her nose rubbing your clit and her tongue lapping you up.

You take a fist full of her hair and hold her head. It’s as soft as you imagined.

“You’re already so wet for me”

You let out a moan in response

As you’re about to come Abby stops.

“I need a better angle, lay on the floor on your back for me” abby says sternly, but like velvet

“Yes m’ame”

You do as you’re told and Abby kisses you and follows the trail of kisses she left before. But this time she ends up in your inner thighs. Leaving hickeys as big as quarters.

“What can I say? I love to leave a mark. Shows people I got to have you. That I was lucky enough to have you”

You blush and bite your lip in response

After that she goes straight in on your clit. She’s sucking while flicking her tongue and it’s the best fucking feeling ever.

She slowly enters a finger and you let out a moan

“Ah fuck yes”

“You like that baby?”

“Yes m’ame”

She enters another finger and you enter another demention.

“Faster Abby p-please”

She does as she’s told and your legs start shaking and your vision gets spotty

“Im- im gonna cum”

Is all you can get out before you start convulsing, your walls grip around Abby’s girthy fingers and you drip all down her face and hands.

Abby’s licks you up and slowly comes up for a kiss. You taste yourself and it almost turns you on again, ready for round 2.

“I thought you were the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen the moment I laid eyes on you” Abby says

You smile a drunken smile as you guys lay on the floor for a couple minutes recuperating. She nuzzles into your neck and inhales while she big spoons you. Her hand on your breast. And you whisper

“I thought the same”

————————————————

You guys almost fall asleep upstairs but the hardwood floor was uncomfortable. Before you leave the storage room though there was one thing you wanted to bring up to abby.

“Hey abby?” You say sheepishly

“Yeah? Are you ok?” Abby said concerning.

“Yeah yeah I’m great but I just- I just wanted to say thank you”

“For what?”

“Taking me in and letting me join your group when you could’ve just left me to die”

“Well I’d never leave a pretty girl like you alone in the woods, also what your group did to you was fucked up anyways”

You blush “that’s very sweet. I don’t know if this is weird but, I found these bracelets in here and I- I wanted to give you one… as a thank you”

The bracelets are a dainty silver chain with a wolf on it.

“These are beautiful y/n thank you. That was very thoughtful of you.”

She puts on the bracelet and holds her hand out to show it off and you do the same.

Abby grabs your hand with the bracelet on it and kisses it

“This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me. Thank you love”

You blush

“We should get downstairs the suns almost up”

Abby grabs you by the waist and you leave the storage room behind.

[dumpsterfire-daydreams]

Adorable Ghost, Adorable Reader, (I'm not saying anything else because the rest is a surprise lol)

Seriously, thank all of you so much for your support and enthusiasm. This was my first ever real story and I wasn't sure how it was going to play out. I just wanted to scratch out my smutty drabbles and let them float away on the internet. I never knew folks would actually read my stuff, let alone enjoy it! But literally from day one, you guys showed up and showed tf out lol. And I can't thank you enough. Y'all are the fuel to my writing choo choo train and that train is gonna keep on chugging! Thank y'all for everything! And if there's every a story idea you wanna drop in my insta or want to get in line for a commission, drop me a message! Even if you just wanna chat or play videogames together, I'm down.

All my love,

DumpsterFireDaydreams

Reader POV:

Many years later,...

"Princess?" Simon called from across the front yard, scanning the area for any sign of you. "Where are you hiding?"

After all these years, he still called you "princess". Others called their other half "babe" or "honey". But you were his little princess and always would be. While you might have grown a bit older, the loving term never did. It made your heart flutter just as strongly as it always had. The only person whose title had changed was his. You still stuck to "Ghost" when you weren't alone. But at your home in the countryside, you only called him Simon. Your Simon.

"I'm over here!" You shouted back from the car port, peeking your head out from behind the bumper of the pickup truck to wave him down.

Simon jogged over to where you sat, hunched over the open hood of an old pickup truck. Your hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail and all manner of car fluids stained your hands.

"What the hell are you doing out here?" He asked, genuinely surprised. "Gave me a real scare when I couldn't find you inside."

"Sorry. I'm just tinkering," you chirped, patting the other half of your work bench. "How was work?"

He happily sank down on the seat beside you, stretching a bit. "Ah, you know. Same old, same old. Rookies who need to slow down and master the basics, veterans that need reminders on how things are done, and the regulars who always manage to get into some kinda trouble no matter what I say. Same story every day without fail."

As much as he complained about it, you knew he loved what he did. Even though he'd stepped down for the taskforce a few years ago, he never really left his training behind. And a local paintball team had practically begged him to step in as their head coach. It was a happy middle ground for both of you though. He got the rush of battlefield strategy and waging war. You got the benefit of him coming back home splattered with brightly colored paint instead of blood. It was a win-win all around.

"Are the guys really going to come buy and show them how the pros do it? Because if they do, I wanna watch."

"Yeah, they should all be coming down next weekend. Figured it'll give them a good bit of fun for once."

You paused, quickly counting on your fingers to do a headcount. "How many am I cooking for again? Well, just tell me who is gonna make it so I can know what to make for everybody."

"Price is definitely coming. Soap said he wouldn't miss this for the whole world. And I just know he's bouncing off the walls with excitement already."

"I have no doubts about that," you laughed, shaking your head. "Please remind him some of these players are kids. The last thing we need is some angry parent mad that he took a mug shot at their little angel."

You could picture the scenario all too easily. Soap crouched behind a corner, smirking mischievously as he waited for an unsuspecting opponent to wander his way. And the second someone did, he'd pop out and send paint pellets splattering across the front of their mask. You could practically hear his raucous laughter just imagining it.

"He'll be fine," Simon huffed, waving his hand. "Don't let his cover fool you. No matter how old he gets, I swear he's just an oversized kid himself by the way he acts sometimes. They'll probably love him the most."

"True. So Price and Soap. Anyone else?"

"Alejandro is still back home visiting his girl, but he said he should make it here just in time. And König and Ida are flying in from overseas to see everyone. Figured we'd make a 141 family reunion out of it."

"König and Königin, you mean."

Simon rolled his eyes at the correction. "Ida, Königin, same difference. Their callsigns are too damn similar and it's confusing."

Though it had been pretty confusing at first, you thought the matching callsigns were adorable. After König had settled down back home, he'd reconnected with an old flame from his special forces days. And when he'd brought her to meet the rest of the team, they lovingly called her Königin. And it made sense why they had. If "König" meant king and she was his partner, it only made sense to give her the German title for queen. It fit her too. Because though she was a force to be reckoned with in the field, Ida carried herself with a soft gracefulness in peacetime. You'd finally gotten to meet her the last time you and Simon had visited his old base. And she was such a sweetheart. The same loving tenderness König exuded was evident in her too. And König looked genuinely happy. He had a new air of peace and calm about him. Even confidence! And you were happy for him too.

Everyone had shown up to their wedding, Soap eager to lead the rowdy reception. She invited you to stand by her side as a part of her bridal party and you happily accepted. And when you and Simon tied the knot a few years afterwards, the whole team regrouped all over again for the celebration. If someone had told you that the gruff, skull-faced lieutenant would one day be your husband, you never would have believed them. And if they had told you König was destined to be his best man, standing by his side for support as he recited his heartfelt vows to you, you would have thought they were insane! But after the dust had settled from when the two of you had parted ways, you and König were quick to resume a close friendship. And when your wedding day arrived, König and Ida were right there by your side to ensure everything was perfect for your special day.

It was always so nice to have everyone back together again. Any excuse to get the family all in one place was never wasted. Though years had spread them all apart distance-wise, their shared bonds continued to remain strong as ever. Like a true family should.

"Hmmm," you pursed your lips, deep in thought. "Maybe I should make something simple that everyone would actually eat. Hot dogs and hamburgers? I'll man the grill!"

"Oh, no you don't," Simon laughed. "You combined with open flame? I don't know if I like the sound of that."

"Aw, come on! I've been working on this truck all afternoon and it's still in one piece!"

Simon tilted his head, studying your work. Though he was hesitant, he couldn't argue with what he saw. Everything you'd done in the engine bay was carried out just as he would have done them himself. Your hands were hopelessly dirty, but your handiwork was impeccable by his standards.

"That's a fair point," he nodded, clearly impressed. "But what made you wanna get your hands dirty with this thing again? You decide to give the old fella another go?"

"Yeah. I really wanna figure him out and finally get him on the road again," you sighed. "After errands, I got a bit restless and wanted something fun to do."

Simon chuckled, a soft smile spreading across his face. "You call this old piece of junk fun?"

"Shhh! Don't say that!" you giggled. "You'll hurt his feelings!"

"He can consider it payback for hurting my feelings all these years. Breaking down at the worst times and all that nonsense. But if he doesn't like it, he's more than welcome to start up anytime he wants."

You patted the side of the car lovingly. "He will! He's just a late bloomer. But he'll grow up big and strong, just like his daddy."

Ghost laughed, shaking his head. As he did, his brown strands caught in the breeze, the wind tussling them up a bit. It seemed another haircut was in order. No matter how many times you nudged him to let it grow out, Simon was firmly stuck in his ways. He didn't need any fuss over his looks. Just a kitchen chair and the steady hum of the clippers in your hand was heaven enough for him.

"Besides," he'd always say. "No one's gonna see it under the mask."

And he was right. It wouldn't show then. But over the years, that mask was another layer of himself he'd shed when it was just the two of you. He'd still pull it out every now and then for some sexy fun. But for the most part, it sat idle on the mantle beside his death certificate until it was needed again.

They were small steps to most people: using his name and baring his face. But for him, you knew they were huge. Without those barriers between him and the outside world, he was vulnerable. He was unguarded. He was human. And it touched you to see him gradually grow comfortable enough to be so vulnerable around you. He always protected you from physical threats or danger without fail. But it was your greatest honor to protect the tender heart he'd kept hidden for so long.

"I know you love working on this thing," he said, rubbing your back. "But are you sure it's worth the effort? We already have my jeep and it runs just fine. We could probably make a decent chunk of change selling this old thing for scraps."

"No," you smiled, but your voice was firm as you shook your head. "We're not selling it, Simon. We need it!"

You let your vague response linger in the air until Simon prompted you to continue, right on cue. "...For?"

"You know I have safety concerns with jeeps. The whole 'no doors or windows' thing?"

Simon scoffed and rolled his eyes, knowing full well where the conversation was headed. His treasured car had been the topic of many heated discussions over the years, some playful and some admittedly not so playful. But when he opened his mouth to defend himself, you rushed on.

"We need something that can get us safely from one place to another. You, me,... and the baby."

All of Simon's prepared arguments flew out the window as he sat there in stunned silence, dumbfounded. He had mentally listed every possible counter to what you had to say, but there was no way he could have anticipated a declaration like that.

"You're-you're pregnant?!"

"Don't act so surprised," you giggled, swatting at him. "It takes two to tango and you know how much we tango. It was bound to happen eventually!"

"No, I'm serious," he whispered, grabbing your hand and turning you to face him. "You're really pregnant?"

You blushed, tearing up a bit as you nodded. "Mmhmm!"

His hands trembled against your shoulders, his eyes wide as a million questions flew through his mind. But he held them all at bay to pull you into a tight embrace.

"Holy shit, princess!" he murmured, laughing in pleasant surprise. "I… We… We're gonna be parents! Princess!"

"I took the test when I got home. I did two, actually. We're gonna be parents!"

"Is it a boy? Is it a girl? What is it?" Simon pulled back, his hands hovering over your stomach as he knelt to lovingly coo at where his child was growing. "Are you a boy, a girl, something in between?"

"Simon!" You doubled over slightly as you laughed, clutching his arm for support. "It's way too early to even know something like that yet!"

"Well, whatever you turn out to be, don't you worry 'bout a thing. I'll be standing by and looking out. And the second you give the signal for evac, I'll meet you at the extraction point. Okay, little one? Just don’t give your Ma a hard time or we'll have problems."

"Aw, they wouldn't dream of it," you murmured. "I'm sure I won't even feel a thing!"

Simon gave you a doubtful look before laughing along with you. You were both practically bursting with joy and excitement. Your eyes danced with a bright happiness. But as he traced your cheek with his fingertips, he could sense there was trepidation in there too.

"Hey, you're gonna be just fine. When the cravings hit, when you start crying over every little thing, and when the baby finally comes? We'll get through it together. Even at the scariest parts, I'll be right there with you. Okay?"

"I know," you sighed. "It's just really sudden. I mean, we've talked about starting a family before. And I'm so excited to finally do it! But I'm kinda scared, too. Shocker, I know, but I've never done any of this before. Is it normal to be this nervous?"

"I say it is. Hell, I'm nervous too. But you're gonna be just fine. You're gonna be a great mother, princess. Trust me. It's me I'm more worried about, honestly. Didn't exactly have the best example for fatherhood growing up. And I really don't wanna mess up, you know?"

"I know how you feel, Si. But look at it this way! You've always been there for me, protecting me and taking care of me. Without fail. You didn't mess me up!"

His face fell into a lopsided smirk. "Didn't mess you up maybe. But I sure knocked you up good, huh?"

"Stop, I'm being serious," you laughed. "Honestly. They'll be lucky to have you as a dad. You're gonna do great, I know it."

Simon relaxed a bit more, clinging to your words of encouragement. Eventually, he nodded and let out a breath of relief. His hands cradled your sides, pulling your stomach close as he planted a gentle kiss against your abdomen. His future child hadn't even arrived yet, but he was already wonderstruck and showering it with love.

"You're gonna laugh, but I had a silly idea for names."

"Oh?" Simon raised an eyebrow. "Lay it on me."

"Well, if it's a girl, we could name her Lilith. It means 'ghost' or 'spirit of the night'. And if it's a boy, maybe Caden? 'Spirit of War' just stood out to me. It's dumb, I know. But I thought it'd be fun to keep the Ghost theme going in a subtle way. Our own little family tradition."

"Lily and Cade," he murmured, immediately creating affectionate nicknames for both options. "It's not dumb, love. It's perfect. Our own little band of ghouls and ghosts."

"It's your kid too, though. You have any ideas?"

Simon rose to his feet, brushing the dust off his pants. "I don't have names or anything. But I do wanna sort something out right right off the bat. We'll baby-proof the house. And all my guns and ammo will be kept safely out of reach. But the minute they are old enough, I'm teaching the little rascal how to shoot. If they wanna be Little Ghosts in name, they gotta fight like one too."

"I suspected as much," you giggled. "I was gonna make you promise to be safe at first, but I know you. They'll be in good hands."

"Oh, the best hands," he smirked, puffing out his chest. "But come on. Let's get you inside and off your feet."

The sun was starting to dip lower on the horizon. But as late as it was getting, you didn't have the heart to leave the car port just yet. The open engine bay yawned at you, seemingly pulling you in. It always felt like the perfect fix was just around the corner. And though it never was, you weren't ready to surrender for the night just yet.

"Aw, man! Five more minutes? I'm okay, I promise!"

"Nope," Simon shook his head, tugging the tools from your hands before scooping you up in his arms. "That was an order, princess. I'm not taking any risks. Don't worry about the car, though. I'll sort it out myself now that I've got a good reason to. But from here on out, Lily comes first."

"Or Cade," you chirped, poking his arm. "It could still go either way!"

"You think I can't tell when I’m in the presence of a princess? Trust me, it's Lily. I just have a feeling. Call it a fatherly instinct."

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s5 episode 11 thoughts

after a lovely vacation romp to maine in the last episode, i am wondering where we will visit next. i liked the last one so much that it’s follow-up will face great challenges!! i also have heard that the next one is a fan favorite, i believe? so interested to see where we go from there.

ah, i think i have seen a screenshot of this episode where scully makes a very annoyed face. and it’s fantastic. but that is all i know about it.

another AI episode! buddy, if only the writers could see what we live in now. i mean, they’re probably still alive. but did they picture sentient computer programs writing essays for nurses and doctors and lawyers in school when penning this script? no. they did not. and yes, i have seen these things in my time at college. we are cooked.

post-episode thoughts: bi scully you are SO important to me!!!!!!

anyway! let us begin.

we open at a diner. where someone is typing on a very beat up laptop. covered in duct tape. king of being on a budget.

the waiter asks laptop guy if he wants his coffee warmed up, and he answers with “no, but i’ll buy another one if you’ll leave me alone” which instantly makes me think this guy is like, some sort of terrorist. and he also is coughing. suspiciously.

whatever he is trying to get into, his access has been denied!!!

a mysterious number calls another guy named jackson on his cell phone, saying that his partner stole his money, and he wants to help him get revenge. the voice says his enemy is in the diner… jackson heads out to investigate

and another guy gets a call that the person who wronged him is in the diner!! and then another!!! and another!! there’s going to be a whole meetup!! one of violence!!!

this laptop guy at the diner is just typing, typing, trying to get into… whatever it is that won’t let him in while others arrive. this diner will be making bank tonight if they all get something to eat. but it doesn’t seem like any of the people coming in know each other… tension is very high as everything is quiet and they take their seats. 

computer guy finally does something to get into the system and coughs. menacingly. saying there is nothing that can be done.

and he puts in a CD…. is he gonna blow this place up??!?!?

BUT we will never know! because US marshals come in, and a gunfight erupts!!

nooo, the poor diner :(

intro time….. scully <3

now what is afoot here. and whatever happened to our deep throat 3.0 figure? she was here for a minute and then dipped. will we see her again today?

the agents are here at the diner to investigate the crime scene, trench coats billowing around. how many trench coats do these guys have? they tend to be darker, but i have a light brown one of stereotypical trench coat color, and i wonder if that would pass in their fashion book

the marshals were here to catch a guy named pico salazar who worked for a cartel, but i think the funny part is that he escaped from federal custody 3 months ago and scully had no idea who tf he was. she’s a busy woman!

no mr. salazar was present, however, there were a lot of other criminals at the scene. “mulder, these are street-level coke dealers, minor wholesalers at most” <- that sounded brutal coming from her lmaooo. read them again for me!

“it’s 2:45 in the morning, you mind telling me what it is we’re supposed to be looking for?” <- NOOOO the FBI needs to STOP WAKING HER UP!!! LET HER SLEEP!!! mulder seems wide awake but this is not surprising.

the answer to what they are looking for is: donald gelman, the hacker guy from earlier, who is a silicon valley software pioneer. who had been missing since 1979!!

he was about to make a deal that would turn him into the second bill gates, went hiking the night before, and was never found again??? that’s weird. mulder must have a mental encyclopedia of notable missing persons. among other subjects.

the computer has seen better days

mulder supposes that this was a hit- bring together 8 known criminals, then call the marshals, and a gunfight was inevitable- but scully says gelman was clearly dying, so what was the point of calling a hit?? a great question from someone known for asking great questions

“you want to kill the brain, not the body” <- i don’t like that response, mulder

scully’s driving today. HE STOLE THE LAPTOP?

“mulder, that’s evidence!” “gee, i hope so” <- LMAO??? what the hell is this guy doing. she is so sick of his nonsense i'm crying

he pulls out the CD while scully looks deeply troubled. and it starts playing a nice little song!!! it's called "twilight time". she’s freaked tf out.

he brings the laptop and CD to the lone gunmen, who are nerding out. big day for guys like them. gelman is famous in their circle. they’re gagged to learn he died; “a brother goes down”, says frohike

LMAOOO scully is reading their lone gunmen newspaper while they do whatever the hell it is they do… there’s an article on the front about infrared monitoring… she wants to go home!!!

langly is trying to hack the code keeping them out of the laptop...

scully comes in again with the steel chair of facts and logic: “anyone, uh, think to check his email?”

LMAOOO i paused to write that down and mulder’s face is PRICELESS he looks soooo proud of her 

woah… old email… had a nice little animation of a mailbox!! makes me nostalgic for something i never knew

gelman's email says david is missing and the hunted has become the hunter. i assume that refers to the AI…? the message is from “invisigoth”

LMAOOOOO mulder puts together that the string of numbers is an ID for a shipping container and she looks SO IMPRESSED i’m HOWLLLING she wanted to climb him like a TREEEE 

(author's note: if anyone has this gifset PLEASE tag me in it. scully was alternating between incredible levels of "i am so over this nonsense" and "we should kiss about it" for mulder AND esther. truly a woman at her limit. god. i love her)

off to shipping container land. is that a place where you can just… visit? he’s trying to give scully directions, but i don’t trust his navigation skills. 

why is there loud music playing from this shipping container… goth rave???

they find the right container, but NOOOO, HE GOT ZAPPED by whoever was inside!!!! she’s worried!! “i’m alright, go, get her!” <- that’s a man focused on the mission

scully is running and running and she tackles this mysterious woman!!! but she zaps scully!! “stop or i’ll shoot”, scully warns, and you KNOW she isn’t messing around!!

BAM! shoot she does. didn't land on her, but it must have been close

(the taser CGI is killing me lmaooo)

yeah, you better surrender. “thank you", scully says <- LMAOOOO she’s had ENOUGH and pins her against the wall to handcuff her

it seems she was just living here… oh, invisigoth is mad!!! she tells scully to bite her!!! i would be mad too tbh but like. they have a good reason to be there! gelman is dead! so maybe let’s be a bit more professional!!!

her computer is beeping beeping beeping…. she says it’s a missile locking onto them?

WOAH scully stopped her with a hand to the chest 😳 

(it was at this point i was Noticing Things between them...)

but mulder believes that they really are going to get blown up!!! scully is PISSED!! she has had ENOUGH!!! she hit a bunch of storage containers on the way out and sure enough, they narrowly missed an explosion….. what does this goth girl know…!!!

lmaooo, now for a nice little drive in the country while they figure out wtf to do with the goth in the backseat. mulder’s stuck in the passenger seat, his legs barely fitting in there. 

mulder clocks that this is about a sentient AI that i guess gelman let loose online to evolve (uh, okay)

“what was your role in all of this? were you the bass player?” <- LMAO SCULLY HATES THIS WOMAN (mulder’s side eye is fantastic as well)

invisigoth recites all her academic credentials (of which there are many, and they are deeply impressive) and then when scully asks her to explain what she did for gelman she says “you wouldn’t understand” ohhh the girls are fighting!!! 

scully pulls over at some random place to get out of the car and yell at mulder!!! we have to stop waking her up at 2 in the morning PLEASE! she thinks it’s all nonsense. maybe invisigoth launched the bomb herself!!!

but invisigoth says that the AI knows her voice and will strike if she talks on the phone… they were working with the AI and then one day it wouldn’t “come when we called it” (is this like a puppy?)

scully’s face is so funny lmaoo

“it’s not a program anymore; it’s wildlife loose on the net” <- i do not think AI really works like that, but i don’t know enough about it to dispute the situation 

invisigoth says that the AI killed david because he was trying to kill the AI!!! and twilight time CD is the kill switch

so they take her to the lone gunmen, who are starstruck!! meanwhile scully is gagged to learn her name is “esther nairn” LMAOOO

“are you gonna take off my cuffs, or do i have to do this with my tongue?” “you don’t want to take a vote”, says mulder <- LMAO WHY TF DID SCULLY DO THAT WITH HER TONGUE I'M CRYINGGGGG

am i sensing some bisexual undertones… like, it’s not just me, right…?

(this was the point where i had to actually Pause and make a post to make sure i wasn't just imagining all of this. after the tackling, the cuffing, the way scully stopped esther by her chest, scully lowkey bullying her, being gagged her name is esther, AND the tongue thing... and thankfully, multiple tumblr users confirmed that it was not, in fact, just in my head. which i am deeply thankful for)

scully’s taunting esther about the AI tracking her. so i guess now they have to go to the physical location of the hardware and give it the kill switch. sure. i guess.

frohike is admiring esther. frohike needs to be sprayed with a water bottle like a naughty cat.

SCULLY IS SO MAD LMAOOO “why don’t you just call him? oh, right; death from above” I LOVE HER ANGRY BAHAHA

(scully flirting by being mean is so fucking funny. i don't know if i would have anticipated that for her character, but now that i've seen it, i embrace it. it was like she hated this woman so much but was also unfortunately attracted to her and she wasn't going to let those seemingly mutually exclusive things get her down)

oh my god, when esther mentioned needing someone that works for the government to do her little hacking scheme, scully looks SO angrily in mulder’s direction… and he really is SO pretty….

i always take time to appreciate how pretty scully is. now we get one of those moments for mulder, as well.

so, off to virginia to do some crime. mulder is here alone and must scale a pole to get to the optic fiber connection? sure, why not. meanwhile, scully sleeps at the lone gunmen head quarters… but invisigoth slash esther has set herself free!!

she’s holding scully at gun point!!! “buenos dias, muchacha” <- okay so i’m not the only one seeing this? right. 

(deep, resigned scully sigh)

wait, i was so invested in whatever the hell it is these two have going on, i didn’t even acknowledge that all the lone gunmen were sleeping together LMAOOO on their little couches!!! aww. best buddies having a sleepover!!

but mulder is… at another pole? 

he calls her “scully?” (most flat, angry voice you have ever heard) “yup.” LMAOOO

he found an abandoned chicken farm with a T3 connection and she says “dandy” <- LMAOOOO

“where are you? it sounds like you’re driving” “you are correct, sir” BAHAHAAAAA

NOOOO, ESTHER HAS HER AT GUNPOINT TAKING HER TO FIND DAVID and she looks SOOOO OVER IT. do not hurt her, esther.

nah, you can’t get between mulder and scully like that… NOT COOL.

mulder’s in the damn trees of virigina??? and he finds a trailer??? 

meanwhile esther, who is now wearing a lone gunmen badge on her jacket, finds an entirely destroyed house where she meant for david to be!!! this is not promising

scully reaches for the handcuffs and unlocks herself from the wheel…. but esther is sobbing and doesn’t notice. did she put her hand back in there to disguise it??

scully’s reaching for the gun…. WOAH esther hands it over to her “go ahead. put me out of my misery”

(scully.exe does not compute. hot goth holding me hostage is now crying in my car: ????)

OH MY GOD, SCULLY PUTS HER ARM ON ESTHER’S SHOULDER WHILE SHE SOBS

(she might be a hater, but even more than that, scully is a lover. gently caressing the sobbing lady who just asked her to kill her)

WOAHHH loud ass noise as mulder approaches this trailer YEESH!!! damn, i had to turn the volume wayyy down!! no warning!!! 

whatever is in that mysterious trailer sees him on a screen…. is this the house of the AI? is he going in there??? will he be blowed up??

his fingerprint is captured and matched!!

WAIT, WE SEE MORE OF HIS PROFILE….

oxford university AB in psychology, graduated summa cum laude in 1982, quantico in 1984, assigned to violent crimes in 1988, x files in 1990….

SO THAT MAN GRADUATED FROM OXFORD IN 3 YEARS WITH A BA AND THAT’S ALL? he definitely carries himself with the air of a dude who did his masters is all i’m saying. maybe that's just what happens when a character is played by a guy who went to 2 different ivy league schools.

idk how much of this i should subscribe to because… god only knows if it will reflect canon or not. would like to get one of these snippets of their whole careers for scully. just so i know what to keep and discard in my fool's errand of calculating her timeline.

wait, back to the wreckage of the house that was exploded with scully and esther. “i lied to you”, she says. okay. so this is getting intimate. 

“imagine being mingled so completely with another, you no longer need your physical self- you’re one” damn. that’s crazy. and also now i am definitely NOT imagining these undertones. like at this point, they’re overtones.

she was going to live forever with david in the AI, but gelman stopped it, because he was afraid of what would happen.

ohhhh, esther finds a picture of her and david in the wreckage :( she says she loved him so much… writers knew it was getting a little too gay lmao

(frankly, i see this as a win for bisexuality)

scully points out that maybe david wasn’t there when everything exploded; maybe he was somewhere else. very thoughtful to console your crying kidnapper in this way, scully.

mulder, meanwhile, is climbing under the trailer, looking for clues. he’s unscrewing something while a little robot on the inside roams around!! aww it’s kinda cute!!! 

he entered from below and climbs in to find a maze of wires and endless rows of computers AND BLEH A DEAD GUY????????????? he looks like the life was sucked out of him!!!! and damn, it is david!!!!!! EWWW YUCKY

oh shit, mulder is being strapped into the same contraption that must have killed david….. this is not looking good!!!

he wakes up in a burn unit treatment wondering wtf is going on… oh, his arms are really burnt and they’re telling him to relax. this is not helpful!!! 

“is it bad?” “you’re in good hands” “my arms hurt” awww poor sweaty burned man :( around 800 people are wheeling him in…. and he sees a huge knife???? for the chopping off of arms??

is this some sort of dream scenario…? these nurse outfits are too weird…

“no, wait… call my doctor. you have to call… my doctor. call dr. scully. please call dr. scully” <- OMG NOOOOO he's scared and he describes her as his doctor… god, can you imagine????

(this gave me ideas of doctoring. which we have already seen in extreme scenarios, but can you imagine him being like "ugh, i have a headache" and she just drops into MD mode. i would like to picture it very much)

this old man is approaching him, and the nurses have weirdly long nails…. man, i don’t like that at all…. he’s being injected with stuff and a saw is buzzing next to his head……. this must be a terrible dream

back in the real world, scully cannot reach him!! esther says this is because the AI has adjusted to her voice on scully’s phone

they are racing to that chicken farm to try and cut it off… esther is using dial up in the car. yo, did dial up work in the CAR??? that is crazy. i could have been playing neopets on the go.

mulder is being visited by a scary evil nurse… did they cut his arms off….. NO!! just one arm!!! oh god. i never wanted to see his arm cut off.

WAIT, WHY IS THIS EVIL FANTASY NURSE WEARING A CROSS NECKLACE LIKE SCULLY?? hey. let’s unpack that at a later date. while she holds him down and says they’re evil and they want something from him.

HOLY FUCK SHE’S SMOTHERING HIM WITH A PILLOW???? “shh, or they’ll hear you” what da hell.

scully and esther are reaching a bridge… but the AI has found them!!! they’re right near a flammable tanker truck!!!

scully climbs up ONTO the truck of the nearest driver to tell him to MOVE and i am shocked by her truck climbing talents

meanwhile, esther is on the bridge that is now moving!! scully’s running after her, telling her to drop the laptop!!! and at the last second she throws it out to the water.

wait. what the fuck is cooking in mulder’s subconscious? why are three nurses rubbing him while he lays under a crucifix. and then he says he has a good dream??? and then she smiles and says it wasn’t a dream.

i don't like that. not one bit.

nurse nancy, you’re freaking me tf out. she says he has to tell “them” about the kill switch… the AI must be concocting some sort of weird nightmare thingy??

they took both of his arms!!!

SCULLY COMES IN WITH A GUN?? AND STARTS BEATING UP THE WOMEN?? LMAOOO THAT SPIN KICK WAS CRAAAAZY

what the hell. 

she’s yelling in his face while he sits there with no arms, asking if they have the kill switch… then he says “of course we do” and kicks her with his feet???

and he breaks the computer simulation???

omg, the scully computer model is killing me…

we should unpack that mixture of his worst fears and deepest desires (arms cut off, nurses touching and torturing him, religious imagery, scully coming in to save the day action hero style) but frankly i don't really want to think about such things at the time. i'm cool with certain parts of mulder's psyche not being analyzed.

he’s calling out to her!!! “scully, help! help!” but no one is around!!!!

esther and scully pull up to the chicken farm place and find his car…. esther is calling “here kitty kitty”, but we have to let her do her own thing…. 

they are also shocked by the terribly loud noise which scully quickly silenced with a few well aimed shots…. that is a woman who get things done!

mulder’s calling out to her!!! but the AI inserts him with more goo and he’s gone!!!

she’s sneaking in through the bottom of the trailer like he did, but she shoots tf out of the little robot i previously thought was cute. good. serves the evil robot right. and lord, she’s beautiful as she sneaks in. with esther behind her. 

they find david all sucked out of life. and scully sees mulder in the contraption. “mulder, can you hear me?” <- nooo, the robot is sneaking up on them!!!! 

the robot wants the kill switch!! esther had it in her pocket!! but if she gives it to the AI, it will “vaccinate” itself against the virus!!! this seems like late in the episode to introduce this idea, but again, i say sure, why not?

mulder is being zapped and scully says to put the kill switch in NOW!!! she goes and shoves it in herself!!! she said idgaf if this AI blows up the world, i need him safe!!!

holy FUCK!!!! “you’re gonna be okay, i’m gonna get you out of here” she says to his limp body as twilight time plays…

(oh, i'm emotional as she tries to lead him away..........)

but esther is frantically typing….

she’s crying… no… i realize what is happening as she tells scully to leave……

despite the imminent risk of explosion, scully comes back for esther… “you don’t listen, do you?” <- ohhhh…. esther strapped herself into the machine thingy!!!

scully, run!! take that injured man and beat it!!!!! esther does not wish to be saved!!

bam!!! the machine blows sparks and then it is annihilated from the sky!!!!

scully is guiding his barely conscious body through the woods…. then they visit the scene later

mulder ponders if esther was able to upload herself into an artificial life

“electrons chasing each other through a circuit- that isn’t life, mulder” “yeah, but what are we but impulses- electrical and chemical- through a bag of meat and bones? you’re the scientist, you tell me”

back at the lone gunmen's lab, their computer reads “BITE ME” in red letters against a black background!! esther!! she is here!!

(do the lone gunmen have a new friend?? can she be called upon to help during tricky situations?? or is she happily frolicking in the internet with david?? or is the answer that she can do both??)

cutscene to nebraska, where kids are playing with a football. a trailer is locked behind a fence, where one of the kids threw the ball. he goes in to fetch it…. but he is being watched by a camera!!!

NO!!! so did the AI live??? and somehow migrate to nebraska??? to watch random children?

for my own sanity, i choose to believe no ❤️

okay, so post episode thoughts: this was definitely a really, really good standalone ep. we had the whole emotional arc, and then the standard “well gee, i think it’s still out there” just when you think there’s hope.

i thought the premise sounded boring, and it actually turned out to be pretty interesting. we saw these weird sexual-ish fantasies of mulder being torn apart and scully saving the day, which are interesting, even if it's not exactly what i wanted to watch. and in the real world we saw her cradling his limp body out of the woods! which is exactly what i DO want to see!

and the skeptic was skeptical of science! but computer science is like, totally different from chemistry and stuff, so i can’t really blame her. she was PISSSSSED to be woken up in the middle of the night and then dragged on a wild goose chase!!! even pulling over the car just to yell at mulder!!! that is real fury!!

and i SWEAR i did not imagine that tension. she was attracted to esther but also mad as hell at her. we've all been there, scully. great insight into scully's type. she seems to like people who are terribly smart.

like i said before, i thought it was a really good episode!!! i’m not sure if it would make my top episodes list, but it would be close if not. i grew attached to esther, and i hope that she becomes the 4th lone gunman and offers insight from her digital abode, and that whenever they’re stumped they can turn to her and say “esther, what do you think?”. and she can beep beep boop and come up with a response. or maybe they can tell her about the latest movies and scientific discoveries. hard to imagine what the digital afterlife looks like and the capability for interaction between the real and digital worlds.

call his doctor…

[simulation-machine]

SIMS RELATED PROJECTS/UPDATES

My spring break is coming up in a week and holy crap do I have plans on plans on plans, especially since my summer is gonna be full of school + internship + HOPEFULLY friggin' graduating with a BA in Psychology so that I can start applying to grad schools.

Read more iffin' you'd like! It's long! Here's a picture of my golden retriever napping on her brother's food bowl to entice/entertain you:

god she is so precious i would literally kill for her

GOAL 1: MASTER GSHADE/ReSHADE

I know that some people are sticklers for this but my thing is that I had no gee-dee clue what I was doing with ReShade, whereas Gshade just kinda clicked and worked for me? That said I have a bunch of resources for learning ReShade so I might end up moving back to it at some point.

My main issue is figuring out the order of all the different effects. It obviously matters, I'm sure people smarter than me have tried to use presets only to be like "why tf does this look absolutely nothing like the baller screenshots this one cool Simblr has?" Annnd it turns out it's order + remembering to turn off certain graphic settings. Also photoshop, but that's gonna take a lot longer for me to figure out lol.

Like I'd been struggling to figure out why @gunthermunch's gorgeous Lithium preset wasn't looking as sexy as it did before annnnd it's because I forgot to turn Edge Smoothing off when switching to it. Jesus wept at how dippy I am sometimes.

Eventually, what I would like to do is maybe make my own preset at some point? I would be kind enough to show the effect order too if I did so. But this requires so, so much more shader knowledge than I currently have.

FUN FACT: My first ever degree was in art, I even went to a very fancy and private art school (School of the Art Institute of Chicago if you're curious)- I dropped out after one semester because uhhh that shit is expensive. Ended up finishing my degree at a much cheaper location in MN. That said, my art was 100% analog and 2D, and it turns out it did not translate super well into trying my hand at graphic art.

It's funny because I've been gifted really neat stuff for graphic art (like a really nice Wacom tablet and Adobe subscriptions), like people just expected my mixed-media ass would know what to do with it. NOPE! But yeah, Sims is sort of my excuse to try my hand at this stuff again, especially since I have a bit more energy now that my soul is not regularly being drained out of my body by customer service and tech support jobs.

GOAL 2: GET CRACKIN' ON ANOTHER DOOR

This one is hard because I am only on Gen 2 of the Orsons and it's sort of hard to justify starting up another story while that one is less than 1/5 of the way done.

THAT SAID, I don't plan on posting Another Door until I have a decent chunk of it done. Since it's not a casual gameplay story nor a legacy challenge, I plan on editing the bajeez out of the screenshots for it, really honing in on the aesthetic. I want it to look and feel very different from my random legacy challenge.

Fortunately, this story has been fucking up my sleep schedule for *months* now and I have a lot of the writing for it done. The hard part is translating that into the Sims, making sure I get the right poses and stuff, maybe even learning how to make some super easy CC (like, posters and stuff), and stuff related to GOAL 1 above.

What I'm saying is that it's going to take a bit. But I'm super serious about sharing it because it's my obsession and honestly the first time a story of my own design has possessed me in literal years.

Also, I want to make sure I have a significant backlog of the Orsons before I start seriously simming for it, because I don't want to screw over my favorite little pixel babies. This legacy challenge is going to be the one, I have done so much to keep my save files to keep it safe from harm (ask me how many backups I have of the save files. JK don't, the number is frankly silly).

GOAL 3: START YET ANOTHER MASSIVE CC PURGE

Y'all, my CC folder for this game is honestly an embarrassment. I go so hard on CC shopping because this community is stupid-talented and I like giving my pixel babies nice things and cool looks. When I'm bored and not quite in the mood for gameplay, I just like making neat-looking sims that I do absolutely nothing with because I love fucking around in CAS.

I have built my own PCs since I was 17 years old, and when I first built COMPUTERMACHINE (current rig) back in the autumn of 2018, it was with the goal that it would run Sims 4 flawlessly no matter what I did to it. It's got ridiculous amounts of RAM, I religiously update parts for it. And to be fair, even with the current 6,907,907,890 TB of CC I have atm it runs better than Sims 3 ever had with a measly 50 GB of CC.

But for me, it comes down to finding all the stuff I wanna use. Making myself get rid of the stuff I don't wanna use. Straight up yeeting the CC that I thought was going to look incredible that uh, didn't deliver.

I do CAS CC purges about once a year but have literally never done it for Build & Buy stuff, because OMG some of this shit I've had since 2014. Like when Sims 4 first came out. YIKES. My CAS CC obsession is notable but it's honestly nothing compared to my Build & Buy. Even before For Rent made building lots slow af, my PC was starting to take a solid minute to switch to different buy categories.

It would take a long af time so I want to make sure I have a bunch of content in the queue before I do it. It's gonna be a whole ass thing and be so, so boring to do. So I'm putting it off for when I have a ton of time to do it. Like, oh, my entire Spring Break?

GOAL 4: MAKE A FRIGGIN' RESOURCES LIST ALREADY

This would obviously need to wait until after GOAL 3 is completed, but I wanna make sure the awesome creators whose stuff I use get credit, and that people know where they can grab neat stuff. It would include not only CC but mods, Gshade/ReShade presets, and maybe even lots and sims I've downloaded from the gallery?

(Since I am super anti-paywall and very unapologetic and rude about it, I will also share where one could perhaps get some of these CCs without paying some dip a Trenta Starbucks Unicorn Frappucino amount of $$$)

It's ambitious as hell because *gestures vaguely at GOAL 3* but it would make things like doing WCIF asks and lookbooks so much easier.

Somewhat relatedly, I wanna make a navigation post, especially once Another Door starts getting posted. That story is gonna be a bit huge with multiple arcs that take place over the course of like, 14 years. Plus once the Orsons get to the 4th+ generation, it would be easier to track things down.

IN CONCLUSION...

I have been having so much fun sharing my silly little Sim adventures on Tumblr, so much more than I ever thought I would! You all have been so great to me, and all of this stuff is sort of a way for me to repay that. Ever since I stopped being able to be artistically creative ever since a really nasty depressive spell in 2017, Sims has been my #1 artistic outlet. And having people who are even somewhat entertained by my pixels is incredibly motivating.

Basically, if you read all of this, DAMN would you have been a rad livejournal follower of mine circa 2007. On the seriousness, however, thank you all so much for being rad and encouraging and sweet. I promise to do you all, if not proud, then at the very least not disappointed.

Time to hit the bong and take some pictures of Lou and Tatertot before taking my IRL doggos on a walk~

[ufolliegy]

how would benrey transformer meet gordon?

Ok, I have to preface this by stating I am not a writer. So if any of this sounds dumb. That’s why.

Anyway, I'm gonna infodump to you about my tf au now. This is gonna be kinda like an outline for a fic if I ever would write a fic about it. Don't take it too seriously.

Benrey is a defected Decepticon living on Earth. He arrived on Earth with a couple other bots, but they found him annoying and ditched his ass pretty early on. Not that he really cared much, he prefers to be on his own anyway. 

Benrey hangs around on Earth for a while. He finds human culture fascinating and decides to observe it from a distance. 

Unfortunately for Benrey, Energon is pretty hard to come by on Earth. He soon realizes that being a Cybertronian living on his own on Earth is almost certainly a death sentence without a proper source of Energon. 

So, he begins searching for a source. He knows he can’t really go back to the Decepticons, after defecting there's no way he’d expect any sympathy from them. Going to the Autobots is obviously out of the question. He’s desperate, but he’s not low enough to go crawling to the Autobots begging for help.

Through his searching Benrey eventually catches wind of a certain research facility located in New Mexico, USA. From what Benrey is able to gather, Black Mesa Research Facility has either located a rare on planet Energon source, or has developed technology similar enough to Cybertronian technology that they are able to synthesize their own Energon. 

While this is wonderful news to Benrey, he also learns that Black Mesa may have captured several other Cybertronians that had been living on Earth similar to himself. He has no doubt that whatever Black Mesa is doing with these Cybertronians, it doesn’t seem pleasant. Unfortunately, this is Benrey’s only lead, he has no choice but to go through with it. Carefully. 

Then like a dumbass, on his way to Black Mesa his Energon reserves run dangerously low. This forces him into a semi-comatose state in the middle of an abandoned desert freeway.

Enter, Gordon Freeman. Gordon is a 27 year old new hire at Black Mesa Research Facility in New Mexico, USA. He has just recently moved across the country, leaving behind his friends and family to grab this once in a lifetime chance to work at the mysterious research facility. He’s finally found a use for the stupid degree that he worked so hard on. By god, is he gonna use it. 

Just a little while after getting settled into his new life, his trusty old "dad car" finally kicks the bucket. A begrudging and sad Gordon gathers up what little savings he has and heads to the nearest used car lot. 

When he arrives Gordon is less than thrilled. He wasn’t looking for the fanciest car in the first place, god knows he can’t afford that, but so many of these poor old cars look beat to hell and back. 

Eventually, Gordon does find something that catches his eye. It’s a big dark blue SUV. It’s absolutely caked in dust and has a couple good scratches and dents, but other than that it seems to be in alright condition. It drives and that’s all Gordon’s really looking for. Though, he does notice a strange looking purple logo on the steering wheel. He decides not to pay it much mind. 

When Benrey wakes up he’s somewhere he’s never been before. Not that he’s been to very many places on Earth, but this place is completely unfamiliar. It's an uncomfortably tight space with gray walls and a cold concrete floor. He figures he’d been offline for at least a couple weeks, his Energon reserve’s weak attempt to keep him from burning through it completely.

He decides to stay put, not wanting to waste what little Energon he has left, and also because he’s genuinely curious about where he’s found himself. He assumes it could be some sort of human domicile?

After a few hours of waiting around, Benrey hears a door swing open and the overhead lights flick on. Standing in the doorway across from Benrey is a human.

This human has long frizzy auburn hair pulled up into a tight ponytail, a scruffy beard, cute little square glasses, and oh. Oh man. Are those freckles? Aw, he’s kinda cute. Haha- whuh, oh shit, he’s walking over here?

Gordon drives Benrey right into Black Mesa, unaware that his new car is a sentient alien trying to steal from the facility. 

Benrey is thrilled that he’s made it into Black Mesa and he didn’t even have to do anything. But, his excitement is short-lived. Now comes the hardest part, actually getting to the Energon source inside. 

After observing his human captor(?) enter the depths of the facility without problem Benrey devises a fool proof plan to get what he wants. 

While on his way home from Black Mesa Gordon notices when his new car starts to act strange. Very strange. Abruptly, all control of the vehicle is ripped away from Gordon as it veers off the road on its own accord. Speeding through the sparse foliage and rough terrain of the New Mexico desert, Benrey takes Gordon far away from prying human eyes. 

Once Benrey is certain there are no other humans around for miles he unlocks his doors and boots Gordon out of the driver seat onto the dusty desert ground.

Gordon stares up in terror, shock, and genuine confusion at the sight unfolding (literally) in front of him as Benrey transforms. Benrey looms over Gordon as he puts on his very best “scary Decepticon looking to get what he wants” face.

Benrey tries his hardest to get Gordon to fear him, to submit to his master plan of forcing the human to grab the Energon for him. For a bit it works, Benrey is HUGE compared to Gordon and could easily squash him like a bug. Not that Benrey would really wanna do that, that would be kinda icky. 

Then, in classic Benrey fashion, he says something ridiculous that has Gordon going from cowering in fear to doubling over with disbelief and laughter. 

'Benrey: C’mon man, i'm trying to be scary here. Stop laughin’ at me. You even got the credentials to be out here driving, man? Pretty shit at it. You got the papers? You got a, uh- a passport? 

Gordon: I- I’m sorry it's just- Wait, passport? Do you mean like a- a driver’s license? 

Benrey: huh?

Gordon: What the actual fuck are you talking about, man?'

The two of them eventually calm down enough that Gordon isn’t screaming in fear or babbling in disbelief. Benrey explains to Gordon his predicament and why he needs him to go through with his “expert plan” to get to the Energon.

Gordon, for one, isn’t buying it. Gordon argues that there’s no way he’s putting the dream job he just got on the line to help the weird terrifying evil car that kidnapped him. 

Benrey looms over Gordon again, Benrey’s metal face coming closer to Gordon’s than ever before. He leers him down at him, which Gordon very much takes as some sort of threat. 

Then, Benrey stands, stretches his metal joints, and turns around to start walking the other direction into the desert. He tells Gordon that’s fine, and to have good luck making his way home on his own. 

Gordon sputters and yells out after Benrey, shouting for him to wait. He considers his options, as much as he really does not want to help Benrey, dying alone in the middle of the desert is not on his bucket list. Not to mention that even if he does somehow make his way home on his own there's no way he could afford to buy ANOTHER car after he just bought this one. So very cautiously and begrudgingly, Gordon agrees. 

In the end the two form a sort of symbiosis.  Gordon gets to risk his job to help Benrey get the Energon he needs to survive, and Benrey gets to have fun driving Gordon around on cute little trips to the grocery store and stuff. The two of them might get caught by Black Mesa for their crimes in the future, but it will be fine. They should be able to handle it.

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

this is probably off topic but like i was rereading sea glass gardens & i was just giggling at the fact that kamo (the good one ofc not the one who took back shots for the greater evil) is just…obsessed with getting this middle school delinquent approval & MEGUMI JUST NOT REMEMBERING HIS NAME???

like imagine dedicating your spare time to impress the adopted child of the strongest who is also the zenin’s heir (if gojo fucking goes crazy or kicks the bucket) who is also the ten shadows user, trying to compliment him, hyping up his skills by saying he has more potential than the current zenin head, only for him to not know your name 😭. & the fact he apologized for it? i’m cacklingggg. you truly embraced megumi’s silent menace tendencies. tbh i was so convinced that kamo had a crush on megumi & was just flirting with him for the whole exchange event 😭.

(also maki’s little story of her interaction with megumi in their childhood? i cried a little. like the fact megumi being a menace to naoya & the clan & taking mai away was like mai’s happiest memory? i really can’t wait to see mai’s appearance here)

also i can’t believe megumi is half dead & blind & he’s already known as “yuuta’s boy”. this is giving when you’re a high school senior & you just forcibly take a underclassmen under your wing & everyone just calls that underclassmen your school kid.

like imagine in a happier universe where shibuya didn’t happen & yuuta pops tf out & introduces himself to the first years. imagine the hilarity of nobara & yuuji trying to figure out how tf yuuta is able to cling onto megs, tease him, & knows little details about him without getting his head chewed off 😭.

honestly..yuuta’s unhealthy platonic feelings about megs makes me wonder gojo’s reaction bc i imagine him being so insufferable like he just assumes that “omg my distant relative have a crush on my emotional support child”

ANYWAYS I LOVE YOUR STORY !! i can’t wait for the next update, your writing is literally so beautiful that i have to re read it multiple times to take everything in (i’m kinda slow). it’s gotten to the point where i accepted your fic as canon 😭. i promise you in a few months your fic is gonna be known as THE JJK FIC. i’m manifesting it. <3

So I’m never gonna get there in the fic because sea glass gardens cuts off pre season 1, but I like to headcanon that Yuuta desperately wants yuuji to like him (he’s megumis friend and also Yuuta feels an obligation to look out for him because they were both sentenced to death) but yuuji is just NOT having it because he’s the one person in the world that yuuji feels almost seething jealousy for. He is not a jealous person. He has never been a jealous person. But Yuuta is living his perfect life, which is a fact that Yuuta would be surprised to learn, because he is not living anyone’s perfect life. From yuujis perspective, Yuuta is:

Inexplicably close to Megumi. Megumi is somehow his boy. Yuuji didn’t think Megumi would tolerate being anyone’s boy.

(He doesn’t tolerate it it’s somehow the best and worst kept secret in the school. Everyone knows Megumi is Yuuta’s boy except for Megumi himself. Megumi insists Yuuta’s like this with everyone while panda silently shakes his head where Megumi can’t see him.)

He’s got some kind of secret history with Megumi that no one will talk about (since I imagine that the second years would legitimately keep their word and not talk about what the Zenin did to him behind his back) but whatever it is it makes Megumi trust and rely on him more than anyone else??? How is the son of a bitch doing it???

He was also sentenced to death but got it suspended and like. Yeah. Yuuji would like to live that dream existence.

The fucking legally adopted child of Nanamin??? How?????

It’s a lot of

Yuuji, glaring at him angrily from across the room: he’s the perfect man

Nobara: why do you say that like you’re mad

Yuuji: why am I not him!!!

Yuuta’s just. Despondent. He wanted yuuji to like him so so bad.

Considering canon Megumi didn’t tell them he had an entire sister until they were at his old school and people were asking after her, I doubt that even waterboarding could get out of him “yeah so I met the second years when my bio family violated the no contact protocol that started because of how dangerously abusive they were and basically tortured me for a week, up to the point of my Actual Death. I was blind for a while. I guess okkotsu senpais protective of me because when we first met he Literally Had To Restart My Heart and Lungs. Also we held hands multiple times in the immediate aftermath.” So I think Yuuji and Nobara would be aware that there’s something weird about how Yuuta and Megumi met but have absolutely no idea what that weird thing is.

(Panda: look it’s really not weird how protective Yuuta is of Megumi considering all that Megumi was going through when they first met

Nobara: What was Megumi going through when they first met

Panda:

Nobara:

Panda: I’ve said too much.)

I have a serious reading of Kamo and a self indulgent reading of Kamo and a Kamo that’s somewhere in the middle.

The serious reading of Kamo is that Kamo was a kid who grew up in a bad situation with very little control over his own life and saw Megumi as the one who could possibly understand him. They both were born outside of their clans but their inherited technique had the ability to elevate them to clan heir. He persisted in trying to compliment him and form common grounds with him out of isolation and a desire for someone to understand his lot in life. Megumi, meanwhile, would see Kamo as exactly who he doesn’t want to become. Kamo has accepted his place in his clan; megumi is violently rejecting it. He doesn’t want to be the same as Kamo because he doesn’t want to be anywhere near the Zenin clan.

The thing is that out of all the characters, Kamo’s really the best one we have to kind of represent the more common views of the jujutsu world. like, he very consistently is shown to be able to make his own assessments about what judgment call the higher ups and the wider jujutsu elite are going to make or expect, and part of it is his desire to fulfill his role as kamo clan heir. And Kamo? Accepts out of hand that Megumi is going to be formally brought into the Zenin clan once he graduates.

Like, he's in the fight during the goodwill event, and he's just like "yeah so when we both graduate we'll both be working to support a major clan in the jujutsu world" and megumi's like "the hell are you talking about. i'm going to kill you with this elephant."

It is probably a common expectation that gojo keeping Megumi from the Zenin clan is not going to stretch into perpetuity. Like. Right now, megumi is a minor. Gojo very easily can control who has access to him. When he’s an adult working in the society, the same trick of preventing all contact isn’t gonna work. Those are his coworkers now. They’re going to get more and more opportunities to bring him back into the fold. The Zenin are just playing a waiting game to get Megumi back and everyone sort of has just accepted that fact.

Kamo is what the Zenin clan expect Megumi to one day be for them, and I think it puts Megumi a bit at odds with him. Megumi has no interest in living the way Kamo does, and a little internalized fear about it happening anyway. Refusing the Zenin clan is the only control he’s ever really exerted over his life and future. He never got to pick being a jujutsu sorcerer, but he chose not to go with them. All of kamos priorities and mindset remind Megumi of all the things he’s messed up about, and it sets them at odds.

The self indulgent reading is that Kamo had a huge crush on Megumi and spent the entire goodwill event trying to execute his four year long plan towards holding his hand only to be thwarted by the fact that Megumi was completely dazzled by a himbo he knew for less than two weeks three months ago.

And the reading above is just the serious reading with the added fact that Kamo also had a huge crush on Megumi.

The thing with Mai partially came from something that Gege apparently released as background lore. In the goodwill event, Mai says that she never told maki when she had her first love, and i was like "that's weirdly specific, I wonder who that is" and then I googled it, and the answer was apparently either Megumi or Maki herself, and I said, "Huh, I Don't Like That" and decided we weren't doing that.

Now, to be clear, I do get making that decision on a level as a writer. Like, the Zenin clan is enormously fucked up and explicitly practices intermarriage. That is the kind of thing where you may include it because it's so fucked up and perfectly exemplifies how fucked up it is. a clan that explicitly is practicing incest is going to heavily skew how relationships amongst family members develop and form and it's going to be a fucked up dynamic amongst closely related people.

But also I Don't Like It And We're Not Doing That.

I did like the idea of Megumi and Maki occupying a somewhat similar place in Mai's mind. Like, Maki is in a league of her own, there's too much history there for anyone to come close to her in a relationship, but Mai's fondest memories of Maki were specifically with Maki occupying a sort of companion and protector role. Maki was in the same "level" as mai. They were both vulnerable kids in a bad situation who were looked down on by their family. They were both fast tracked to be servants. But Maki was the brave one, the capable one, the one who guided her when she was afraid and promised to always be there, and that's where a lot of mai's complex emotions around maki come from: mai was afraid and maki was strong and maki was there to hold her hand, and then suddenly she wasn't anymore.

Once I put Megumi in the Zenin compound as a little kid (since it's unclear what contact Megumi had with his bio family pre-season 1 and how extensive it was), I knew that 1) the zenin would not be putting him anywhere near Mai and Maki, and 2) that I wanted them to have met anyway.

So I liked the idea of Maki and Megumi occupying similar spaces in mai's mind because they both had briefly been viewed by Mai as companions and protectors. Megumi's contact with Mai was way more limited than Maki's was, but Megumi sort of swept into her life at a time where Mai really did need it most.

Mai would have been right at the age where most kids get their technique, if they get any at all, and we can sort of assume that mai may have figured out what hers was late if Maki didn't know about it. She just failed to get the ten shadows technique, and was a freshly confirmed failure in terms of power. She was just feeling the sting of her family's rejection, and Megumi, meanwhile, was the one who was supposed to be the most special and blessed of them all.

And he was the only one who didn't reject her out of hand, other than her sister. He stuck his own neck out to protect her. They all played together. There's not a lot of good memories than any of the three of them have on the Zenin compound, but I think that all of them secretly thought of that day as one of the best they can remember from childhood.

And it sort of was a huge deal for Mai. Everyone was treating her like she was dirt under their heel, but there was Megumi, the presumptive heir to the clan, the Ten Shadows himself, and he played with her. He was her friend. I think that would have been kind of a landmark moment for little mai. not only is that the acceptance and kindness she desperately needed, but I think it was also sort of source of hope for her that she could have a place in the Zenin compound one day without it being utter garbage. Megumi was assumed to take over the entire clan one day, and he was kind to her. He was her friend. He didn't let Naoya treat her badly, when Naoya was the one who was likely going to be heir if Megumi hadn't inherited the ten shadows. Naoya was at the top of the food chain, but Megumi still stood up for her, even though her own parents wouldn't have. So maybe when he grew up and became clan head, he wouldn't let people mistreat her and maki anymore. They could all be happy together, and Mai couldn't imagine a future where she and maki got to be happy before. Even though the clan leadership cracked down pretty hard on them for that stunt, it didn't make a dent in how overwhelmingly happy it made her.

Megumi going no contact probably would have been a huge blow, especially considering her age. She lost her hope and her only friend who wasn't her sister in one fell swoop, and she really was too young to have the tools to understand just how much Megumi needed to be kept away from her family for his own safety.

Mai, back then, was living in such a warped life that she didn't really realize how bad her family was, especially to Megumi. and that's not so much a comment as to how bad it was for her there versus him, but more that she had very little context as to what his life there was like. she was never supposed to meet him. She mostly heard about him secondhand, and that's all being filtered through the zenin's unique. All she ever heard was about how the ten shadows had finally been reborn, and how the clan was blessed for it, and how upset they all were that they had to give him back to gojo. No one even wanted her. Megumi seemed like he was living a much better life than anyone at the zenin compound could expect, so what cause would gojo have to take him away?

She was just a little girl who didn't really have friends other than her sister and him. She wanted to play with him again. She didn't understand much outside of that.

Of course, she's had time to grow up and kind of put her memories of the past in a more reasoned context. Maki came to the conclusion that Megumi probably didn't have the best time there a while ago, and this incident has really put it into perspective for her that he must have cut off the zenin because they were dangerously abusive towards him. Like, she mostly never saw him, but she has a lot of memories of him 1) being hauled out of a training room unconscious 2) being on sixteen hour days at the age of six, and 3) being violently unhappy whenever he was in the compound. Mai, to a lesser extent, likely has a similar awareness that he didn't go no contact for shits and giggles, it was because her family's fucking bonkers and abused him badly enough for gojo to pull the plug. of course, how that's shaped mai's mindset towards megumi now is still yet to be seen.

I know what it is, of course. it is seen for me. you all have yet to see it.

Gojo can and will make his own existence everyone else's problem and yuuta is sooo right to not want him to know. like. he wouldn't kick yuuta's ass. but that doesn't mean he'd be good about it.

I'm so glad you like the story! thank you for your kind words!!!