#and the whole time i had no idea my world had already shattered without me knowing
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#today is essentially my first day driving combine this year since my 'first day' was only like an hour and a half long almost two weeks ago#but of course my first day we're harvesting the field that was the last one we did last year 'care free'#one year ago today was the last time i saw my sister#and tomorrow will be one year since we harvested this field and afterwards we went home for dinner#and while refueling equipment after dinner my brother in law went to see if my sister felt up to running grain cart for us that evening#and he found out she wasnt home and nobody had heard from her all day#so that was the evening of the 16th and we didnt find her until the morning of the 18th#it was probably somewhere around noon on the 16th when she killed herself#and it just wrecks me cause i can remember exactly what i was doing that whole day#like someone here sent me an ask about whumpy music so i spent hours that day compiling a playlist to share here#and i was talking with a friend (in a group chat that consisited of me my sister and our friend) about their zucchini harvest#and another discord server i was gushing about it being the new moon in a Blue Moon month plus the persied meteor shower#and the whole time i had no idea my world had already shattered without me knowing#it makes me hate this field and i hate that even with the way we rotate crops every year it still came up ready this week#probably would've been worse if it came up on the 16th again but it's not much better being on the 15th
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"Us, Forever"
Summary: Pablo can't believe how lucky he got with you, he really can't believe it
Word Count: 1.1k
A/N
I managed to get Corona! The one time I would have had time to write something I got Corona and a Fever that cooked my brain. But, now my test is negative again and my brain is producing ideas like crazy!
Hope you like this one though,
Love you guys Magdi <3
You didn't know what to think when you saw his pain-filled expression on TV. You sat there, completely frozen, worry the only thing on your mind.
When you heard his sobs over the phone as he told you how bad it was, your heart shattered into a million pieces. That day made you realise that from that moment on, you had to be the strong one in this relationship.
It made you realise that he needed you to be the one he could lean on, the one Pablo could let his guard down, somebody that could be strong for him too. So he didn't have to be all the time.
You made it to your mission to do everything in your power to help him in any way possible. You rebuilt your living room into a bedroom, so he didn't have to go up any stairs. You held him day and night when the pain got too strong, and the only thing he could do was cry.
"Baby, I'm here ... I'm here for you. Let it all out I got you."
His grip on your hoddie was so hard that his knuckles turned white. You wrapped your arms around him like you wanted to protect him from everything terrible that this world threw at him.
Pablo felt safe in your arms. Your sent calmed him down. The warmth of your body engulfed him in a comforting manner.
He buried his face deeper into your neck as he felt his breath starting to slow down again.
"T-Thank you, I-I'm sorry. I don't know what happened."
You grabbed his head to make him look at you. You assured him, "Hey, it's completely ok to feel like shit sometimes. What you are going through is nothing easy. Sometimes you just have to let it all out."
Kissing his head, you stand up to grab something to eat for the two of you. Seeing that it was already 6 in the morning, you decided to start the day, knowing you two wouldn't fall asleep anymore.
Pablo kept lying on the couch. The pain in his knee was now only a dull ache. He sat up a bit to be able to see you rummaging through his kitchen drawers, trying to find something to eat.
An unconscious smile makes its way onto his face. He can't get his head around how you are willing to do all of this for him. Like he really doesn't know what he would do without you. You'd do everything for him, he doesn't even have to ask for it.
But it scared him that you wanted to help him so much. It frightened him that one day, you could wake up and realise how much work it was to be in a relationship with him. And that you would leave him because of that.
Realistically, something like that would never happen, but he was a chronicle overthinker, so let him be.
When you came back from the kitchen with two plates in your hand, you sensed something was bothering him, but you wanted him to tell you on his own.
You two ate your breakfast in silence, it was a weird kind of silence. You felt that Pablo wanted to tell you something the whole time, but nothing came. He just sat there and played around with his food.
"You not hungry?"
Looking like a child who got caught doing something stupid, he shakes his head and lowers his gaze again, not able to hold eye contact with you for so long.
Thinking he wouldn't say anything at all. You were about to say something when you heard him say. "How do you do it?"
Confused, you look at him. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, like ... like how do you keep up with me?"
Your confusion didn't get any better. You looked up from your plate and saw Pablo already staring at you, a curious yet slightly sad expression on his face.
Pablo noticed your confused expression and continued to talk.
" I mean, how can you keep up with literally having to be my server? You are cancelling your plans to stay home with me and do everything to keep me comfortable. You put my life before yours. Why do you do that? I-I don't understand. "
You loved him deeply and didn't see your efforts as a burden. It was natural for you to do what you could to help him. You couldn't enjoy yourself while he was suffering because it felt wrong to you.
Your silence made Pablo panic a bit, maybe he made you realise that you didn't want to live like that. What if you were actually sick of him needing care 24/7 now?
Your voice interrupted his inner monologue, " I have no clue, to be honest. It's just - the second I heard you were injured, I felt like I had to take care of you, to help you somehow."
You took a second to think of your following words. "When I heard you crying on the phone that day, I just felt the need to protect you, to take care of you. I know that you are a capable individual who can handle things on your own, but I want you to know that I love you with all my heart. When you care about someone deeply, it's natural to want to do everything in your power to ensure their well-being. So, even though I trust your abilities, I just want to remind you that I'm here for you if you ever need help or support. Your happiness and safety mean everything to me, and I'll always do my best to make sure you're feeling okay."
Hearing Pablo sniff made you stop your rambling and look at him.
"Dios mio, these medications make me emotional."
Pablo let out a wet chuckle as he wiped his tearing eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie.
You smiled at the boy before you and leaned down to place a kiss on his red nose. "I don't care, I love you one tear more or less isn't gonna change that."
"I love you too, so so much."
#pablo gavi x reader#pablo gavi oneshot#gavi x reader#pablo gavi x you#pablo gavi icons#pablo gavi x y/n#pablo gavi#gavi x you#fc barcelona#fc barça
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Heart of Stone
Sirius Black x GN!Reader
Summary: After repeatedly feeling disappointment from supposed friends, the last straw is when your heart shatters after the love of your life turns you away like everyone else, so you decide to harden your heart so much that nothing can ever hurt you again. Fourteen years later, the same man enters your life once again.
Warnings: Fake friends, feeling unloved, heart break, loneliness, mentions of death, crying, cussing, angst, a hint of fluff
Word Count: 4k
A/N: This one is a bit of a longer piece, I just recently finished it and I really loved this idea and I think it turned out not too bad. I tried to keep it GN!Reader but if it does not seem to be at any point, please let me know! Apologies if there are errors/typos, I tried my best to catch them. If you enjoy it don't forget to give it a like! A reblog would be appreciated as well :)
.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.
You sighed, eyes flitting between your friends, or that's what they said they were to you anyway. You, however, felt otherwise. Sure these people were in your year, half of them your dorm mates, but when they made plans without you, forgot you were there during conversations, you would feel your heart clench and feel otherwise.
You had known love from dear ones once, when you were young. But, fate had been too cruel to you and snatched your parents away from you just as you had entered Hogwarts. It had taken a huge toll on you, realizing your parents were gone forever. Sure, you had moved in with your uncle and aunt and their kids, but having already been distant from them, it affected the amount of love you received from them.
It took you some time but you were able to make friends slowly after you were able to accept the fact your parents weren't coming back. The years progressed and while you had initially loved your friends, now you felt more a tag along than anything. They barely acknowledged you and would only notice your presence if you suddenly spoke up.
You were tired of it and soon broke ties with them. However you were unaware at the time, but someone entirely different would enter your life and change everything for you.
That someone was Sirius Black.
You weren't even sure how it had begun but suddenly one day the Gryffindor began to ask you out, and continued to do so until you finally said yes some months later as you both neared the end of your sixth year.
And that was the best decision you had made.
You were beyond happy with Sirius and you couldn't imagine your life without him.
You were madly in love with Sirius Black.
Your life was looking all good.
Until now.
"What?" You breathed out in disbelief as you stared at the man in front of you.
It was a late autumn evening in 1981, and Sirius was over at yours. The two of you had yet to move in to a place together since Sirius stilled lived with his best mate, Remus, and since Remus struggled financially, sharing a flat the two best friends could pay for it together, which you and Sirius both understood how much easier it would make things for Remus.
It was always a joyous and lovely time whenever Sirius came over to your place, except now, you felt your whole world crashing down.
"You heard me the first time." He grunted out, "I want to break up."
Your lip wobbled as tears began to cascade down your cheeks.
"Why?" You whispered out, the heartache reflected in your voice.
Sirius looked at you with cold eyes, "Why? Because you're worthless and you were just a time pass for me, nothing more, I'm tired of you."
Those words were the last straw. You heard your heart shatter into a million pieces as the sobs escaped your mouth, your body wracking with each one. For once in your life after so long, you thought things were alright, that you were happy and loved. How could you have been so blind?
"I hate you, Sirius Black." You uttered out as you felt your knees buckle out from underneath you, making you fall to the floor as you cried. "I hate you so much." You said before shakily wiping your tears away as you stood up, trying to get a grip on yourself in front of him.
"Get out." You spoke, pointing to the door, "Get out of my home and never show me your face again." You ordered, staring into those grey irises you loved so much. You saw Sirius' face flicker with a different emotion which you couldn't decipher, before his face hardened and he turned on his heels, walking away and slamming the door behind him.
As the sound echoed off the walls, you let out a sob and finally let yourself crumble entirely.
"What did I do to ever deserve this?" You cried out, pouring your heart out as you let the tears flow.
Although after that day, you vowed to never let anyone hurt you again and to never shed a tear again.
So as James and Lily died and Sirius was sent to jail for their murder, you did not cry, and as Remus disappeared without a trace, you did not cry.
You had died the day Sirius had broken up with you, as each of his words had pierced your heart like a dagger. Now, all you had was a stone for a heart.
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
Many, many years after the end of the First Wizarding War, you stood once again in a similar situation. Voldemort had come back but everyone refused to believe James and Lily’s son, Harry Potter. So Dumbledore took matters into his own hands.
The Order of the Phoenix was back in business.
You sauntered in, causing all heads to turn and some to even gasp in surprise. After all, you had worked hard and become one of the top Aurors of the department.
“Glad to see you have finally arrived, Y/n.” Dumbledore said to you before turning to the whole room, “This here is Y/n L/n for those of you who may not know, and they will henceforth be joining us from today.”
Murmurs and nods of agreement filled the dining room before you were gestured to a seat by Dumbledore. You swiftly placed yourself on a chair, turning your full attention to the Hogwarts Headmaster. Although you of course felt that prickling at the back of your neck, the sensation of being watched.
You knew who it was, and you hated him. So you did the only thing reasonable.
You removed your gaze from Dumbledore to the Azkaban escapee, who watched you from the head of the table, your ex, Sirius Black, and stared him down with a coldness that sent the warm smile that erupted on his lips vanishing, making guilt flood his face.
Satisfied, you turned back to the Order Founder once again.
The meeting went on and before you knew it, your chair made a sound as it scraped against the floor when you stood up, as you headed out of the meeting room and straight for the main door of Twelve Grimmauld Place.
A hand caught onto your wrist, pausing your movement. You felt your body stiffen. Even after all these years, you still remembered his touch.
“Let go, Black, I have places to be.” You gritted out.
“Hear me out please.”
You immediately freed yourself from his grip and spun on your heels, glaring at Sirius who only watched you with a broken look. He had caused this and he had regretted it since that day and would regret his decision until his last breath. He had hurt his Y/n and turned you into this shell of a person.
“Like I said that day all those years back,” You began saying, “I don’t want to see your face.” You spat at him before turning to go, leaving Sirius stare after your retreating figure in guilt and heartache.
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
“He really misses you, you know?”
You looked up at the tall man beside you, your piercing gaze staring into his soul.
“It was his fault for whatever happened. He left just like you disappeared as well.” You replied making the Gryffindor’s expression turn into one of shame.
You had ran into Remus Lupin at the second Order meeting, seeing the werewolf after so many years, but like towards everyone that had hurt you, you had disregarded him.
Now as you and Remus were on your assigned mission together, the Gryffindor tried to make another attempt to get through to you.
“I’m sorry, you know that, Y/n.”
You let out a breath, “Focus, Lupin, danger could be anywhere.” You stated instead, ending the discussion altogether to which Remus shook his head in defeat, heaving a heavy sigh.
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
”Y/n/n.” He said as he corner you at the stairwell. You glared up at him as he caged you against the wall.
“Move Black, before I hex you.” You gritted out, making Sirius only shake his head.
“Not until you listen to what I have to say.”
You groaned, letting your head fall against the wall. Sirius had been persistent in his attempts to catch you, but you always got away from him quickly. To be frank, you were tired of it.
“Fine.” You said and watched Sirius’ face light up. “But after this, you will not try to approach me ever again, got it?”
Sirius’ smile dimmed but the hope in his eyes shone just as before. “I give you my word.”
You released a breath, irritatingly, pushing the man away, gesturing for him to follow you to the room that housed a small library. You both stood by the fireplace, the light creating shadows on your faces as you stared Sirius down.
“You have only a few minutes to explain your gibberish, so start talking, Black.” You said, your arms coming to fold over your chest as you began to tap your foot impatiently.
Sirius sighed, running a hand through his hair, “I am truly sorry for all the pain I caused you. I deserve every bit of your hate, but you need to understand I did it to keep you safe.”
You arched an eyebrow, letting out a cold, mocking laugh, “Seriously, Black?”
Sirius nodded, “You have every reason not to trust me but believe me, I only broke up with you because I needed to make sure you were safe.” He paused, sucking in a breath as you watched with slight curiosity, “I had originally agreed to become Lily and James’ Secret Keeper, and I knew I was going to be a big target.” Sirius paused, his voice choking, “I-I couldn’t have let you get harmed due to me, y/n/n, I loved you too much. I did what seemed reasonable at the time; To push you away.”
Sirius sank down into the armchair, holding his face, “Of course, not only did I fuck up by losing you for good but I suggested Peter as Secret Keeper, and that decision cost James and Lily’s lives.” He said, staring blankly into the fire.
Sirius dared a glance up at you only to discover that you were already gazing at him. There was a different, softer, emotion in your eyes, but Sirius couldn’t decipher what it really meant. He watched you open and close your mouth a few times, before loudly clearing your throat.
“I don’t know if your story is true or not but I’m sorry about James and Lily, they didn’t deserve any of it.” You paused, swallowing, “I’m sorry about you landing in Azkaban, because you weren’t at fault for their murders, but I can't forgive you, we could have worked something out but you made the choice to push me away and it worked. I can't ever forgive you for the pain you caused me.” With that, you looked at him, shaking your head slightly before walking off, leaving Sirius to stare after you as your words echoed around in his head, his heart dropping.
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
True to his word, Sirius had stopped pursuing you after that fateful day, for which you were grateful. However, you felt a rather peculiar feeling pulling your heart after that conversation, but you couldn't understand what it was and why it was bothering you.
One evening, you had been invited to a party to celebrate Ron and Hermione becoming Prefects at Grimmauld Place. You had just stepped out of the bathroom and were heading back to the dining room, when something caught your ear.
"Hey, isn't that Y/n?"
You paused, the voice seemingly coming from the room closest to you currently on the floor.
"It is." A rather familiar voice answered.
Sirius.
You quietly peeked into the room, only to find Sirius sitting, with what seemed to be a photo album laying open on his lap and Harry peeking over his shoulder.
"Wait... Are- Were you two..."
"A thing? Yeah, we were." Sirius said, his voice carrying a fondness that he had always used with you.
"But now you aren't together anymore? Why?" Harry questioned, his eyebrows furrowed as he scratched his scalp, reminding Sirius of his best friend.
"Because I messed up the best thing in my life." Sirius answered, his tone holding a somberness to it. "I thought it was best to break up with them to keep Y/n safe, but not only did I screw up there but my mistakes also cost your parents' lives, Harry."
There was a tense silence that felt suffocating to Y/n, who was listening carefully from the outside.
"Do you still love them?" Harry slowly asked, gazing at his godfather with sympathy and curiosity.
"Never stopped. Y/n's one of the reasons I was sane in Azkaban. I never stopped loving them, Harry, and I never will." Sirius answered, his eyes glossing over.
You felt your heart twist, something familiar coming up but you shook your head fiercely. You couldn't become weak.
Not again.
With an air of determination, you walked back to the party, unaware that the past was catching back up to you.
*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*
Months had passed since then, you had been on guard duty the most, guarding the prophecy in the Department of Mysteries. The one day you had not been able to attend your assigned shift because you had fallen ill, Arthur Weasley had been attacked by Voldemort’s snake, Nagini. Thankfully the ginger man pulled through and was fine. Some months after that, there was no trace of the white snow as June had long arrived, bringing warmer days.
Ever since you overheard Sirius talking about you with Harry, as much as you denied it, something had shifted in your heart. At times, your mind was full of thoughts of the raven haired man, or you’d secretly glance at him, although much to your dismay Remus had caught you once and he had been teasing you endlessly, knowing your long buried feelings were surfacing once again.
It was one day you were at Twelve Grimmauld Place, in the dining room after a meeting. Only a few of you remained behind, your fellow co-workers Mad-Eye Moody, Kingsley Shacklebolt and Nyphmadora Tonks, a good friend of yours, along with Remus, whom you had began to fix your friendship with and Sirius, who still received your coldness, which he willingly accepted. But that didn’t mean he hadn’t showed small gestures for you, whether that was making sure your glass of water was full at dinner, or going to bed after you had retired to your room for whenever you had to stay the night. Although you wouldn’t admit it but you were touched by his actions, reminding you of the sweet time from all those years back.
However all hell broke loose as you all received a Patronus, prompting you all to apparate out to the Ministry of Magic, as Harry and his friends had apparently ended up in the Department of Mysteries, where the Death Eaters were on their tail.
The group of you burst through into the room where they all were and that’s when all chaos broke loose. The Death Eaters turned onto the newly arrived and a huge battle broke out. You found yourself face to face with Rabastan Lestrange as you ran in.
His eyes lit up in delight, “Well if it isn’t the famous Auror L/n.” He cackled, “Too bad it’s time for you to finally be defeated.” And he shot a spell at you which you dodged, instead throwing a spell his way which he deflected.
Both of you were going back and forth but he hadn’t realized you were just making him feel a false sense of security.
He laughed again after deflecting another spell, “That all you got? You’re a disgrace to the name of an Auror, L/n.”
You finally smirked, “Bye bye, Lestrange." You uttered before casting a powerful spell, that too so quickly that the Death Eater noticed it a second too late, too absorbed in his self glory and went flying, hit a wall and fell down, unconscious.
It was a secret trick you used, knowing these people were too self absorbed about themselves that any small feeling of victory would have them letting their guard down.
Satisfied, you turned your eyes towards the others. However new shouts and people pointing had you looking up only to realize Albus Dumbledore, who had been on the run due to the Ministry wanting to arrest him, had also joined the battle.
Only one pair was still battling, apparently unaware of the new arrival. You watched Sirius duck Bellatrix's jet of red light: he was laughing at her.
''Come on, you can do better than that!'' He yelled, his voice echoing around the room.
Your eyes flitted to Bellatrix, whose face took on a deadly expression of determination.
You felt your feet begin to start moving, knowing this wouldn’t end well as Sirius was distracted. You had just screamed his name when the second jet of light hit him squarely on the chest. The laughter had not quite died from his face, but his eyes widened in shock.
“SIRIUS!” You shouted as his surprised gaze turned to you, and he began to fall, right back into the Veil and you felt your stomach drop.
Your years of training came into use and you managed to get there and caught his hand, pulling him back. You lost your balance and the pair of you fell onto the ground.
You heard Bellatrix cackle gleefully, shouting, “I killed Sirius Black!” And Harry, who was in a state of shock turned to her in anger and chased her all the way out, Dumbledore following. However, you couldn’t care less. You were numbly staring at Sirius’ limp body beside you, and suddenly your heart broke.
“SIRIUS!” You shouted out in agony, cradling his face. “Wake up, please! You can’t leave me again! Please wake up!” You cried, your head falling against his chest as you sobbed your heart out. “I love you.” You whispered out, too distraught that all your intelligence had left you. It’s only when Remus sat beside you, slowly grabbing you and letting you cry against him, that he, as a last attempt gripped Sirius' wrist due to which did you all find out he was still alive.
Some hours later, you all were back at Twelve Grimmauld Place, waiting for the Healer to fix up Sirius. As soon as the Healer left, you burst into the room, dropping to your knees by the bed, watching with tears of relief pooling in your eyes as you saw Sirius' chest evenly rise and fall.
He was alive.
Everyone else present at Headquarters took a little peek at him before leaving the room, knowing you and him needed time alone.
"You were right, Remus."
Remus, who was standing beside you, looked at you with a surprised expression, "What?"
"You were right, I had been lying to everyone including myself." You told him, gently stroking your thumb over Sirius' hand, gazing at him softly. "I think my feelings had come back a long time ago, I just was too stubborn to admit them." You confessed, your heart twisting. “If Sirius had died, how would I have lived with myself?” You said, turning to look at Remus, who looked at you with sympathy.
“But you have the chance now.” He answered, squeezing your shoulder encouragingly. A knock interrupted the two of you and you both turned to find Tonks sticking her head through the door.
“You got a second, Remus?” She said, to which the werewolf nodded and patted you gently on the shoulder before following the metaphormagus out. You watched him go and as the door shut, you turned to look back at Sirius, softly brushing a few loose strands of hair away from his face
He suddenly stirred, his face scrunching up before he flickered open his eyes, grey orbs flitting around as he tried to understand where he was.
"Siri?'
Your voice caught his attention and Sirius turned his head slightly to the side to look at you, his gaze filling up with love.
"Y/n/n?"
"How are you feeling?" You asked.
Sirius stared at you in surprise, finding you by his side, looking so worried which was completely astonishing to him, since you barely ever glanced at him.
"I think so." He groaned, eyes clenching shut for a brief moment, "I remember dueling Bellatrix and then a spell hit me but after that..."
"You almost fell through the veil. You almost died." You told him, your voice cracking on the last word making Sirius frown in concern as he sat up, pulling you up to seat you beside himself.
Your lip wobbled as tears began to cascade down your cheeks. "I am so sorry for everything. I-I-" A sob escaped you, "I was so hurt when you left that I told myself I'd never let anyone else in, and I held it against you when you were nothing but sorry."
Sirius felt his heart shatter and he moved to grab you but you shook your head, "I don't deserve you." You said, curling in on yourself as you finally let yourself cry, to let all those emotions buried deep within the chambers of your heart break free.
Sirius' grey eyes filled up with tears and he wrapped his arms around you, allowing you to sob into his chest.
"It's not your fault, love, it never was." He told you, caressing your head gently.
"I almost lost you today and I would have never forgiven myself if I had never got to tell you that I still love you."
Sirius stiffened, his mind buzzing while his heart began to thump loudly in his chest. He couldn’t believe his ears.
“You what?” He uttered out in disbelief. You pulled away, wiping your face before placing your hands on either side of Sirius’ face.
“I love you, Sirius Black.” You expressed, your lips turning up into a small smile. "I love you so much."
Sirius stared at you with slightly rounded eyes before he smiled so wide that you melted.
“Am I dead and in heaven?”
“Sirius!” You scolded, smacking him very lightly on the chest for his mischief.
Sirius let out a bark of laughter before his eyes filled up with love and fondness, his grin not leaving his face.
“I love you so much, darling.” He practically whispered, his voice reflecting his heart. “I love you so much.”
You beamed at that before letting your hands slide to his neck, your breathing beginning to pick up as Sirius moved his hands down to your waist. Your eyes flickered between his eyes and back, him doing the exact same. You both leaned in, your eyes slowly fluttering and you gently attached your lips to his.
At that, memories of all those years came rushing back. The feel of each other, the kisses, the hugs, the happiness, the love.
The kiss was slow and soft but once you both got a taste of each other, emotions became high and the two of you got more aggressive, Sirius picking you up and placing you on his lap as you both deepened the kiss, wanting more of each other as the two of you had been deprived of each other for so long.
A sudden throat clearing made you jump and the pair of you pulled apart only to find a smirking Remus and a gleeful Tonks.
“So I guess it’s time for a celebration huh?” The young woman said, eyeing her cousin and friend.
“I think it’s best if we leave these two alone.” Remus commented, throwing a wink your way to which you flipped off them both, earning chuckles out of everyone.
Sirius pulled you close, kissing your cheek before you rested your head on his shoulder.
After long and lonely years, your heart had returned to its previous state, like it had been all those years ago, before it had hardened into stone.
Your heart was back with Sirius Black and his was yours.
Forever and always.
.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.
#harry potter#marauders#wizarding world#marauders era#sirius black#fanfiction#dreamingofmarauders#remus lupin#james potter#lily evans#nymphadora tonks#sirius black x reader#sirius black fanfiction#sirius x reader#sirius black x y/n#sirius x you#golden trio era#order of the phoenix#angst#couple#lovers#fluff#break up#james and lily#sirius orion black#12 grimmauld place#I really love this piece#its me serina#love you all#hope you enjoy
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no but essek's abnormal behaviours in the last arc and especially in episode 140 are my roman empire. which is ironic because aeor is something of a roman empire itself. but in all seriousness, it was the episode that made me realise i love essek and his development so much and it kinda summarised it even before caleb's epilogue.
and i mean the "it's not fair" scene specifically. it's like, an epitome of his whole character progression from a person who put An Objectively Important Goal above all else without hesitation to someone who can't help but care for people around even more than his goal, no matter how big and relevant it is.
the mighty nein - and he alongside them - pretty much saved the world and freed an ancient city from thousand-year-long suffering. they defeated nine extremely powerful menacing entities who managed to stay out of everyone's sight for years and were so close to achieving their goal and dooming exandria in the process. they did the impossible and became heroes and somehow, they survived, even though they had bidden farewells a couple of hours ago because they had already understood what they had been facing. and nevertheless. they made it.
and none of them was celebrating.
mighty nein are basically essek's only friends. he knew them to be very unusual people, to put it lightly, loud and stubborn and completely inescapable once they consider you to be one of their own. and they showed him so much kindness and put so much faith in him, they were here playing the most atrocious music ever and digging clay in his backyard for a spell they invented just to help one of theirs and asking him if he could bring them pastries the day after they found out he was lying to them and had started a war. they were chaotic and weird and sometimes unbearable but most importantly they were carrying so much hope with them all this time - a hope they could end the war, a hope they could stop the angel of irons cult, a hope they could get better, a hope he could get better, and now, finally, that they could save their lost friend.
and that hope shattered, just like that, the moments after they'd already made the impossible. they saved so many souls - and then could not get back just that one.
for essek "my intentions were never good they were important" thelyss it just. shouldn't have mattered. they won. it could have been worse. people die and when they die they rarely come back. they should've been happy everyone else barely made it alive.
but for some reason, mighty nein being so defeated after they saved the world exposed him to that overwhelming feeling of injustice and unfairness. and i mean, there were many things essek considered to be unfair, but when i watched his first appearance and his interactions with mighty nein later on til their reunion in aeor arc, i wouldn't dare to guess that one of the things on that list would be something that personal. and personal not even to him.
the thing is, essek didn't even know who that guy was. why mighty nein cared about him so much. he had an idea, i guess, that he was their friend once, or someone in that body was. it was also a person who wanted to unleash a terrifying horrific aberration onto the material plane. it was a person very dedicated to killing essek and his friends - and they still didn't take any pleasure in fighting him. essek didn't feel strongly about lucien or molly, because he never knew them.
i don't think he mourned his death and failed resurrection. he mourned mighty nein's hope, the one they put in him when they had no reason to, the one they offered yasha in the cathedral and the one they kept after the spell for veth failed and the one they carried til the very end because they wanted it to reach molly. they had saved people with this hope. they had saved nations. they had saved the world. but they ended up feeling like it hadn't even been worth anything.
how desperate would it feel, witnessing people who for some reason always saw good in you when they absolutely shouldn't, who made literal miracles out of nothing, who ended wars and fought gods and tricked the hags and freed cities from horrors beyond anyone's comprehension purely because they thought it was the right thing to do and also loved their friends this much, silently crying over a dead body they couldn't bring back to life? how desperate would it feel to realise that with all your knowledge about time you dedicated your life to and threw away any principles for, you can't undo this? no one can. some things are left to fate alone and this time it wasn't kind to them. no matter how much good they did, they still got slapped in the face.
and it was, i think, such a genuine moment of empathy. like, essek is the character who prefers to put up a facade and act distant and self-composed but this time he just. walked away unable to watch this. the could only say to fjord that it wasn't fair. even when he was caught off guard in nicodranas he was able to explain himself and his motives to an extent even though he was a nervous wreck whose extra important plan went to hell the second the only people he cared about appeared. this time he had nothing to elaborate on. it just wasn't fair. it wasn't fair his friends didn't get what they wanted the most. it wasn't fair he couldn't do anything to make it right.
it is such a sad and beautiful and even cathartic scene because it is about person who started a war that destroyed so many lives - and then met this ragtag group of weirdos who saw a lonely stand-offish guy and said "hey, let's be friends!" and didn't even wait for him to answer. he saw them being serious and calculated and he saw them being ridiculous and extremely stupid, he saw their mistrust to outsiders and their loyalty to each other, he made spells with them and paid a visit to their hot tub, he ate their stale pastries and drank their hot chocolate mixed with whiskey, he was welcomed amongst them and in their wonderful home, both in xhorhas before they even found out what he had done and in the tower when they already knew - and then, he saw them mourning their loss, defeated and helpless, and he, a person who believed there were things more important than whole nations, let alone just one life, couldn't help but share the pain they felt. a pure display of compassion from someone who detached himself from it, who didn't believe he could grow into a better person capable of it again, but became one nonetheless without even realising it
#sorry. i cannot shut up about this. this scene stuck with me the moment i saw it and i just couldn't get it out of my head#i mean. i liked essek well enough. i just got attached to other characters more. but then 'it's not fair' happened and it sealed the deal#it was just. so beautiful. so sincere. so important for a character who just started to learn how to care about people#his reaction wasn't intentional. it didn't change anything. but it showed how humane he had become. how deeply he cared#mighty nein are no joke pal#they're gonna make you feel all these unknown emotions like sympathy and love and affection even when they're incredibly painful#essek experiencing closeness and attachment in all their forms. as something beautiful and something aching. is so important to me#they saved him because they had good hearts! and these good hearts sparked so much joy around them!#but if a good heart grants you an ability to experience joy so profoundly. it makes everything else feel like that#you get it. i hope you get it. anyway e140 did so much psychic damage on me i probably will never recover#in a good way mostly <3 but yeah. yeah. it makes me feel a little insane#the mighty nein#essek thelyss#critical role
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imagine this, right? i js got the idea. might not be the best one in the world, but here.
dick and tim have been married for anywhere around three years. tim’s twenty four at this time, dick’s thirty-one. their love life is incredible, sex life just as good. tim kisses him in the mornings. they go out every sunday. the batfamily’s come to accept it because they’re so in love. their honeymoon phase is literally their whole marriage.
‘disgustingly in love,’ — jason.
‘dick has stooped so low,’ — damian.
‘please don’t make out on the couch,’ — duke.
they’re the kind of couple people hate, the bond that people want to have, and—
then dick cheats.
it wasn’t a good decision, but happened with this villain—‘and you know how the men in this family are with villains, tim, how the villains are with us. she was hot. and it had been going on for weeks. i refused until he didn’t. i tried, tim.’ dick doesn’t have a good excuse. tim’s out of his life within a week, divorce proceedings already starting.
it’s dick’s all time low. tim doesn’t even look at him. dick begs him to stay as he packs his bags. he says he’ll never do it again, it was a one-off occasion, but tim’s trust is like stained glass, so pretty when he has it, so devastating when it shatters.
tim’s friends despise dick. kon-el always challenges his authority on joint missions now. steph outright says the divorce was his fault and disinvited him from outings because it was still so fresh and tim would be there. wally and cassie give him looks and fall into whispers whenever he passes. jason jokes about it and has it in every low blow he can muster.
he still sees tim every other day, because of their careers, but tim avoids his patrol areas and bruce purposely sets them apart.
once or twice, bruce mentions how they should forget grudges on the job, but he can’t help it.
almost a year passes, and tim’s birthday happens. dick watches it happen from his phone, scrolling his socials, and breaks down. it’s a cycle of him wanting tim to feel as useless as dick without him, to him wishing the best, until he admits he wants nothing more than tim again and hates himself for losing that.
he buys him a gift that night. leaves it on tim’s usual work space in the batcave. that evening, he finds a sticky note on his door with the word “thanks.”
he places one on tim’s desk, so sure it’s him, giddy with the idea of them talking again, he writes back, “ur welcome.”
it should be the end. instead, dick finds a “how did u know i’d want this?” on his nightwing suit. he replies with, “because ur tim” and places it on the zesti can in the bundle, because tim takes one around this time, and always follows their placement.
“what does that mean” on dick’s shoes in the morning.
“u like collections” on a figurine tim left in the parlour.
“i know and i couldn’t even get my hands on this one” the inside of dick’s smoothie mix bottle.
“what? u can’t get ur hands on a simple superman figurine?” the side of the leg extension/curl machine in the home gym, timed before tim’s work out.
“there was only five of this one ever made.” the mirror in dick’s en-suite.
“and now u have one of them :)” tim’s degenerate energy dark chocolate bar container.
they go on like this for a couple weeks. start hanging around the manor that much more often to encounter their next note.
“did u see what she wore to the gala? (he forgot her name, so there’s a doodle of a woman with pronounced ears and a bad tiger print scarf crammed on the note)” “didn’t you wear five toed shoes to a gala?” “it wasn’t tiger print.”
“i love alfred’s cookies.” “ur sticky note has crumbs.” “don’t talk to me about sanitary stick notes, piss stain” “u could smell the apple juice stop with the piss allegations :(”
and so forth. eventually, dick musters the courage to talk to tim again. he says hi one night they cross paths on patrol. it’s the most awkward reaction he gets, silence, then a returned, ‘hi.’
the sticky notes stop.
dick hates himself for a total of three days before tim asks if he wants to work a case together. he hops on it fast.
they spend all night looking through it, figuring it out. it’s difficult. they spend the night after that to finish it. tim’s speaking to him again, a bit more like a friend, more sarcastically, and dick knew he couldn’t stay away forever.
a month later, and he might mention something of their past, hinting on it. dick hasn’t gotten over tim. ever. tim replies, in the kindest way possible something that translates to ‘we’re never getting back together.’
dick is heartbroken.
their interactions change as soon as tim is aware dick’s still into him. not in the way he distances, but in the way he talks to dick, leaning over his shoulders to show him new installations and software, holding his forearm time to time, casually, like his hand just slid there without thinking, and hanging an arm over his shoulder enough for dick to ask himself why.
dick once asks, while tim is dealing with a bad gash and he’s in daring spirits, ‘do you ever miss us?’
‘maybe,’ tim says, ‘i miss the other stuff.’
‘the other stuff?’
‘like, the sex.’
he realizes quite soon that tim’s ‘we’re never getting back together’ euphemism wasn’t a full sentence, or concept. he did say something else after, to further soften it, but dick stopped listening then. he mentioned he didn’t mind them being friends, something other with benefits, and it clicks then.
we’re never getting back together, but we can hook up if you want.
tim didn’t say that word for word, but it’s clear he meant that now.
dick wants the same relationship with tim he had then, beyond sex. they were better than sex. sure, the sex was incredible, tim felt so good for him, and remembering it now starts a craving in him that furthers when tim’s fingers brush along his skin.
‘i meant more than that.’
tim shrugs. dick should probe, keep trying to pry something out of him. but dick is a weak man when tim offers him something.
‘but that’s fine. i miss it, too.’
dick wishes he could take the betrayal back. he hasn’t touched anyone else since the divorce. it felt like cheating, seeing someone else, made him sick and he wasn’t in the hottest mood without tim around. but now tim is, for him, and he’ll take whatever he can get.
that’s how dick ends up with his ex-husband on top, insisting he does all the work because he just sterilized and bandaged his side, and it’s best he stays down. tim slips down him, and it’s been a while, such a long time dick is throbbing before tim even starts. he grabs his hips so hard, and can’t even thrust up before tim scolds him and breathily threatens to stop if he keeps writhing so much, that he needs to keep still if he wants this.
dick strains not to lift into tim, trembling beneath him, running hands along his smooth torso. so, so pretty.
tim’s thighs work, slapping onto his flesh, his cock dripping on dick’s abs. dick wants to sear his finger prints into his hips. to account for how he can’t thrust his hips without tim aggressively palming at his stomach, shoving him down or making him jerk down with pain, he manhandles tim by his hips, plunging him down on his cock. tim sings so lovely, hunching over. he tries to kiss tim when he hovers close enough for it to work, but tim rights his posture the last second, bouncing on dick’s cock and he loses his mind. he squeezes his hips one handedly, the one thing anchoring him, focusing his other on rounding tim’s cock and rubbing.
hair haloes his bowed head, his blue eyes dazed then shutting tight, pretty lips falling ajar in a gasp. dick swallows down the i love you clawing in the back of his throat, and comes after tim, spurred on by how he tightens, his trembling, and that look on his face. tim slips off of him, first checking the bandages for any bleeding, and relaxing when there’s none.
finally, they clean up, but it happens again. and again.
it’s good for the reason hook ups often are. better because tim knows him, knows what turns dick on, and where on his body causes tremors to race about his nerves. it hurts for the reason that’s all it is. hook ups. tim never kisses him during them or stays too long for after care before he finds something to do.
dick is still so in love. he can’t complain. but he wants something more. he can be casual with anyone else, but not his timmy.
however this ends im not sure but it was an idea i had ig.
!!!!!! dick being so desperate to take back what he did and to be able to have tim again but not being able to. the most he can get is the occasional hookup but even then tim still keeps his distance and does not treat dick affectionatly and doesn't act like them meeting is anything other than a hookup. i love the idea that when tim starts treating dick more civilly, maybe even nicely he gets so happy and exxcited that it might mean more only to deflate when tim tells him no again.
dick starts getting affectionate, starts reaching for tim because he thinks maybe because tim is nice to him now, that because tim talks to him, doesn't look at him with dead fish eyes that it means...more.
and then any hope dick feels collapses when tim holds his hands and starts softly talking like dick is a child. "just because i can work with you and just because i laugh with you and am nice to you, it doesn't mean i forgive you dick. it doesn't even mean i miss you,"
just dick always getting his hopes high and then having them knocked out from under him.
dick was always stuck in this cycle of relationships. cycling through the same partners again and again and after cheating on tim it ends. he never enters that cycle again. instead he enters a new one. one where he reads into tim's behavior and words thinking he has a chance again, building his hope up again. only for it to be dashed.
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The Red Storm
This is my first time writing anything related to One Piece and I'm extremely nervous. I haven't written anything in 2 years so please bear with my abysmal grammar.
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Fandom: One Piece
Pair: Shanks x Reader
- I wanted it to be a one shot but I'll have to write it in two parts (or more, who knows) -
Part 2 : here
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*CRASH!*
This was not how you wanted your morning to start; with a crash so loud, it must’ve been heard across all the seas. Must be those gremlins! you immediately think. Ever since you had agreed to look after those three, your life had become a whole mess. You take a deep breath and get out of bed to take a shower. You have only just put one foot down when you hear Dadan’s scream followed by loud laughter. Of course, they’re at it again. You sigh and hurry up to the bathroom before you are summoned on your devil babysitting duties. Taking your clothes off, you step under the shower, letting the warm water relieve you of your stress for a moment. However, the relief dies down almost immediately as you find your mind going back to the memories you so desperately try to suppress and yet they keep haunting you every day.
-2 years ago, Windmill Village –
“What do you mean you’re leaving without me? You promised me that I could come along the next time!” Your voice echoed in the empty bar. You didn’t care, you were livid. The man put his straw hat on the table and closed his eyes.
“Look, I’m sorry. I know I promised but where we’re going is not safe at all. You are not ready to go to the Grand Line. It’s very dangerous and I do not want to risk your life-“ Before he could say anything else, you throw a glass at him which he dodges annoyingly easily. He looks at the shattered glass and then at you. “Calm down, please. Let me explain-“
“SHUT UP! I don’t want to hear any excuses! You promised me, Shanks! Leaving without me means this is over, right? You and me?” He looks at you solemnly and tugs you toward himself. You try to push away from him but as soon as you hit his chest, your arms automatically circle around his neck as you try to stop your tears from falling. He holds you close, without saying anything. Hearing his light breaths, you realize this might be the last time you ever see him. You hug him tighter which he reciprocates.
“Shanks please don’t leave me…”
He doesn’t reply. Not a word. He just kisses the top of your head. After what feels like an eternity, he releases you and you gasp at the sight of his face. There stood Red-haired Shanks, tears coating his slightly flushed cheeks. You put your hand on his cheek and wipe his tears away, while your own tears release from their prison and onto your cheeks.
“Please forgive me. The path I am going on is very dangerous. I could never drag you into this mess. Maybe you’ll never forgive me. Maybe you’ll never understand. But I’d rather have your hatred than bear your loss.”
You move your hand from his cheek to his hair and touch your forehead to his. You want to be mad at him. You want to hurt him as he was hurting you. But he was right. You had never left the village. You had no idea of the world outside, especially the Grand Line. Even if he does agree to take you along, you’d end up becoming a burden.
You try to say you understand but your throat feels heavy so you simply nod. Fresh tears paint his face as he cries silently, already mourning the relationship you both had. Ever since he started frequenting the small village, you both stayed close to each other, the closeness only increasing with every meeting. You would wait for him at the docks with Luffy, looking forward to being in his arms again. And now he would never come running down the docks and pick you up into his arms, smothering you in kisses.
“Hey,” he says softly, “I want you to do something for me.” You chuckle sadly. What could he possibly need from you now…
“I want you to look after Luffy. He’s going to be very sad after we leave. Knowing that you’ll stay with him will give me peace of mind. Please?”
“Of course, I’ll take care of him.”
Shanks nods and hugs you again, this time settling you down in his lap. This time he cries loudly and you don’t silence your sobs either.
The next morning, you wake up to see flowers near your bed with a goodbye note. That was the last time the red-haired storm rustled your life.
---- present time -----
You don’t realize how long it has been until you hear Dadan knocking at your bathroom door.
“If you don’t come out in a minute, I will break this door apart!” Dadan’s angry voice drags you back to reality and you quickly dry yourself and put some clothes on. As you emerge from the bathroom, Dadan is onto you, grabbing the collar of your new shirt. “Those three gremlins are getting on my nerves! I’ve been calling them for an hour now but they aren’t listening! Gather them or I’ll throw all four of you out of here!”
You sigh and pry your shirt out of her grasp. She takes a step back and raises an eyebrow. “Well?”
“Well, what?” your voice comes out more rude than you wanted it to be. “I mean, where did they go?” you add on quickly.
“The forest, where else! Hurry up and bring their asses back!”
You nod and head out to the forest. You had promised Shanks to look after Luffy but you had no idea what awaited you. After Garp decided to send Luffy to the mountain bandits, you requested to tag along, which he agreed to. You knew it would be dangerous but what you didn’t know was that you were getting a package deal. At first, it seemed that you would go mad over Luffy and Ace but then another one popped up randomly. Now the three of them had become friends and made it their mission to make Dadan’s life a living hell. You were caught in the crossfire. The boys were very fond of you so they often got behind you to escape Dadan’s wrath and Dadan held you responsible for every slight inconvenience caused by them. It was too much sometimes but it was a reprieve. You couldn’t imagine how you would’ve dealt with Shanks’ departure without the three devils. Speaking of whom, you spot them sitting in their tree house. You smile involuntarily and call them out.
“Luffy! Ace! Sabo! Come down. Time to go home or else Dadan won’t give you any food!”
Luffy is the first to come down, of course, he is. He is followed by Sabo and then finally Ace, who is staring daggers at Luffy. You glance at them, feeling the tension rising with every passing second. Luffy, oblivious to his impending ass-whooping, chuckles loudly and tugs at your shirt.
“Let’s go home quickly! Or else I’ll have to sleep hungry!”
You pat his head softly and he gives you the warmest grin in return. Suddenly you’re reminded of Shanks who used to give you the same warm smile whenever you greeted him at the bar. Stupid Shanks!
Ace lets out a fake cough and suddenly pulls Luffy’s right ear which stretches unnaturally. Luffy screeches like a crow and sends Sabo into a frenzy of laughter. “Ouch!! Ace, what is this for?”
“What is this for? Really? You idiot! When I said don’t go down, why did you jump?”
“Because she said Dadan won’t give us food!”
“Shut up! You broke the brother code! I’m the oldest, you both listen to me!”
Sabo’s face scrunches up at that. “You know, I still think I’m older than you…”
Ace sends the blonde boy a death glare which shuts him up.
Their innocent altercation fills your heart with warmth. You walk up to them and put your hand on Ace’s shoulder. He looks up at you and his cheeks instantly turn pink. The two boys giggle at that and his scowl returns immediately.
“Ace, come on now. Be easy on your little brother. All he did was obey me.” you say in hopes of pacifying the angry little boy. He sighs and nods. “Well, I’ll let it go because if we don’t return soon, Dadan will be angry at you. But if they do this again, I’ll kick their asses.” You laugh softly and nod in agreement. “Let’s go then.”
You start walking back to the house with the three gremlins following you, unaware of the red-haired storm that is making its way back into your life.
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Xinnimon's Theory Times
Our finalists: Knife and Suitcase; we love them dearly. Both of them definitely deserve the win, between how they interact, and how they've developed, it's a great final 2.
However...
What would they do with the money if they actually won? I've talked about this briefly previously but for this post I want to focus on Suitcase. Besides the fact that I'm rooting for her personally, she also has something interesting that she could do with the money that simply would have less impact with Knife.
Travel.
Seems odd at first but I have multiple reasons to think that Adamation is going to pull a "Steven Universe Future" on us.
(this is pretty long so I'm putting a cut and TLDR at the bottom)
1: She's a Suitcase
My first point is that she's literally a suitcase. Why would this matter? Because of what object shows are known for. Symbolism! Fan being a fan of the show. Test Tube being smart. Knife being aggressive. Cabby being organized. I could find a reason why every single other contestant symbolizes something but we'd be here forever.
Suitcase arguably already has symbolism like: baggage, keeping things to herself (until recently), ect. But that doesn't mean that she can't have more. It would make TOTAL sense for a suitcase to go see the world and travel considering the fact she's made for it, literally.
2: The Big Reveal
I think her traveling could help a LOT with this realization. Why? Because she can see what is real! I've seen some people thinking that Mephone4 made the entire world mainly because of Cobs saying "he basically made a world" but I think that was just his wording trying to trick us. He said "basically" for a reason. I think that there is a reality that the contestants have interacted with.
The first objects that come to mind; the unvitationals! (minus Walkie Talkie and Springy) MePhone4 seemed surprised by Groscar saying she liked the show and she seems to have an audience outside of II. The camera people just aren't there that much (probably cuz they have their own lives) and anytime they are on screen they're just a mild annoyance for Mephone4. Dr. Fizz doesn't have many reasons to be real besides saying that Box needs to go to a hospital but there's nothing pointing to him being fake either. And of course there's the entirety of Meeple! If Meeple isn't real that wouldn't make a lot of sense considering the fact that that would mean that Mephone4 would have had to generate his own trauma. That doesn't add up. So that means that most likely Steve Cobs and all the Meeple products are real in the sense that they were either biologically or artificially built with no generation involved.
We've seen season 3 contestants interacting with unvitationals, and season 2 contestants interacting with Meeple. Which means that there is a probably a real world for them, and they can access, interact, and be a part of it.
3: The Talk
(If you don't feel like watching the whole clip rn, here's what I want you to take away from it for this post)
She quite literally mentions the idea of leaving to move on. Do I think she'd leave forever? No. Do I think that her staying with the contestants to try and fix her issues with them would be the healthiest option? Honestly also no.
I think she had a point in which she needs to be by herself for a while to figure out her issues, how to tackle them, and how to move on from the show in a healthy way; without dragging her friends down with her. (which she doesn't seem interested in anyways)
I don't know about you but after having my entire reality shattered, I would want to see what is real out there, enjoy what is there. In fact I think it'd make me feel more alive, more real if I was in a real environment!
Granted this wouldn't solve all of her issues. Like Knife had a point when he says later in the conversation, "careful there, you're starting to sound like MePhone" if this is the only thing she does she just running away from her problems and trying to forget everything. But instead of doing that she could genuinely take some time to figure out who she is and even if she was made a bit unconventionally she is still real.
She's important.
TLDR:
She's a suitcase, it would make the most sense out of all the contestants for her to travel.
After the big reveal in the newest episode, seeing the world outside of the show (which I'm sure exists) would be good.
It would probably be healthy for her to be by herself for a while and figure out who she is outside of the show.
...
I think it's also worth mentioning that there's a good chance they might not even get the money, it could be a tie/draw, everyone could freaking DIE, we simply don't know. But this is assuming two things that are really unpredictable (suitcase winning and using the prize money, if it even exists, to travel which would be slightly odd considering the past prizes have been for everyone)
If you have any bonus thoughts, please, don't be afraid to reblog! Or if you don't want this on your blog you could always just shoot down a reply. This is a theory post! I want to hear what people think and contradictions! No idea is a dumb one! (...or don't, honestly the fact that you bothered to read all this is enough :)
#inanimate insanity#ii suitcase#suitcase ii#suitcase inanimate insanity#inanimate insanity prediction#ii prediction#I love her dearly
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Love me or hate me, both are in my favor (Miguel O’Hara x Fem! Reader [HS Academic Rivals AU])
Hiii! New day new chapter! Sorry it took so long to get out, my birthday is in Sunday so I’ve been busy. Not proofread, enjoy!
Cursing, slight mentions of wounds.
Word count: 2k
Series Masterlist Series playlist
Chapter 8: No, I don't wanna fall in love with you.
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Swinging around the city always helped clear Miguel's head, finding it very calming compared to the very chaotic hustle and bustle of Neuva York. From the top of the Empire State, everyone looked like ants, and it gave him the ability to de-mask himself without the possibility of anyone finding him. It was one of the many perks of being Spider-Man, the ability to hide away above the rest of the world.
Although, usually the breathtaking skyline against orange and pink hues that painted the sky was enough to serve as a temporary distraction before he had to return to his usual routine, but it seems that today’s events were too much for his mind to just drop. With a heavy sigh, he ran his gloved hand through his now slightly disheveled brown locks, gripping his mask with his free hand.
God…
As if you hadn't already dug some sort of permanent spot into his life, now you were completely messing with his mind without even knowing it.
He shouldn’t have kissed you back. Not because he didn’t want to, because if he was being completely honest with himself… maybe he did. But, you’ve never liked him, you’ve never liked Miguel. He’s convinced himself his whole life that he disliked you, not just because of your constant battle at attempting to one up each other grade wise, but because you both were far too stubborn and egotistical to be able to sit in a room with each other without squabbling. He’s never been partially nice to you, sure, but neither have you to him. He hated you.
Right?
He wasn’t so sure anymore. But he knew for certain how you felt about him. You loved Spider-Man, not Miguel. And although he knows he’s being a bit selfish, and only going to hurt himself in the process, he was gonna keep it that way. He’d take all the snarky comments and glares you shoot his way, if it meant being able to kiss you again. He’d shatter the entire universe in his bare hands if it meant for you to keep kissing him the way that you did.
—
“O’Hara, hey- are you deaf now or something?” Your hand landing on his shoulder pulls him out from his thoughts, he’s been in them more often than usual lately he glanced over his shoulder to send you a quick glare before turning back down at his notebook. His eyes scan over the words on the page but none of them registered in his mind. He felt your finger tapped on his shoulder. “You can’t keep ignoring me. We have to work on this project, you know.” You huffed quietly, your eyes drifting from the back of his head, to the front of the class to make sure the teacher wasn’t watching and back again. “You’ve been skipping out on practice.” This was the second time today you’ve tried to get him to talk to you, and still he doesn’t give you anything but a glare, the cold shoulder, it was insufferable. The biggest thorn in your side had decided to just remove itself at the worst time, two weeks away from the presentation of the scene project.
With a huff, you sat fully in your seat once more and looked back down at your own book. Just deciding to attempt to catch him after class again, but the more the time ticked away the more your agitation towards him grew. This was somewhat odd behavior for him. He hasn’t flat out ignored you since you had been in the 7th grade, the most you’ve gotten out of him as of recent is his usual glare or scowl. You’d never admit to his face, but him ignoring, it almost felt like torture. You have no idea what you did for him to suddenly give you the cold shoulder, a week ago at the aquarium before your sudden graze with death, you had thought that you both somewhat gotten along for once. Now he goes out of his way to dodge you in the halls or leave your texts on read, you couldn’t help but feel that same small sinking feeling in your chest that you felt when you first tried talking to him in the 6th grade only for him to scoff and turn up his nose at you. If it weren’t for the fact you had to work on this stupid project together, you probably wouldn’t be so persistent.
Or, at least that’s what your telling yourself.
—
8:45pm.
Miguel was currently an hour and 15 minutes late to yours and his study session, not like he showed anymore anyways. At least he could justify the nagging voice in the back of his brain telling him to go to your dorm by telling himself that patrolling was a better use of his time and resources, and way less of a headache then having to deal with you when you’re pissed off.
Thankfully, the streets of Neuva York were relatively calm, no crazy mastermind villains trying to take over the world, just a few pity crimes here and there, not enough for him to actually break a sweat but just enough to not be able to call it a night just yet. Small vandalism, an attempted mugging, helping an elderly lady cross the road, small more simpler tasks. With each one ignoring the small inconsistent yet slightly irritating buzzing that his phone was releasing in his suit pocket.
11 missed calls, and 24 unseen messages. His gloved thumb slowly scrolled through the preview of the messages as he took a small break on top of a random counter rooftop, his free hand pulling his mask up to just above his nose before going to grab the BLT sandwich from the bodega and taking a bite out of it. Each chew and swallow becomes slower the more he nears finishing the sandwich. Telling himself he’d finally suck it up and face the music, the migraine inducing headache that was your scolding.
As he downs the last bite, he clicks on your contact, finger itching to hit the call button.
“Help!”
“Shit…” He mumbled to himself as he quickly pulled himself up on his feet, stashing his phone away once more before his mask was back over his mouth.
He’ll call you afterwards, he tells himself.
—
9:38pm.
He flaked. Again.
“I’m not surprised, still disappointed though.” You mumble to yourself as you go to change out of your school clothes and into a nice pair of sweats and a sleeping shirt, placing your headphones on to listen to some music, it’s still early enough so you decided to get some reading in. Stretching your arms over your head, before going over to your bookshelf, your fingernails tapping the spine of each book until you reach the one you wanted to read.
Setting back into your bed, after turning off your overhead light and turning on your lamp instead, you finally open up on the page that you left off.
“Now you must have a good long holiday!”
“I intend to.”
Something in his resolute tone made Jo look up quickly to find him looking down at her with an expression that assured her the dreaded moment had come, and made her put out her hand with an imploring, “No, Teddy. Please don’t!”
“I will, and you must hear me. It’s no use, Jo, we’ve got to have it out, and the sooner the better for both of us,” he answered, getting flushed and excited all at one.
Tap tap.
“Say what you like then, I’ll listen,” said Jo, with a desperate sort of patience.
Laurie was a young lover but he was in earnest, and meant to ‘have it out’, if he died in the attempt, so he plunged into the subject with characteristic impetuousity, saying in a voice that would get choke now and then, in spite of manful efforts to keep it steady…
Tap tap.
“I’ve loved you ever since I’ve known you, Jo, couldn’t help it, you've been so good to me. Now I’m going to make you hear, and give me an answer, for I can’t go on so any longer.”
“I wanted to save you this-“
Tap tap.
“Is someone throwing rocks at my window or something?” You quickly close your book after rebookmarking your page, trying to wave off the idea, your on one of the higher levels of the building. So being able to accurately hit the window over and over would be difficult.
Placing your book on the side of your bed, you get up and go to draw your curtains back, only to be met with a familiar blue and red mask popping up in your window pane. Your brows shot up and biting back the urge to let out a small startled yelp, your hands made quick work to unlock your window and open it up to allow him to climb in, trying his best to not knock over all the trinkets on your bedside table. Trying your best to stifle your laugh as you watch him crawl all over the tiny surface like a cat.
“I didn’t realize we were at that level, Spider-Man.” You joked, letting a small chuckle slip past your lips as he finally stumbled onto his feet and off the counter. Your laughs only increased as you watched the red lines on his mask narrow as he seemingly glared at you.
“Says the one who kissed me.”
“Touché.” You said only you were able to eventually stop laughing, allowing your eyes to finally scan over him. Your face quickly contouring into one of concern when you finally noticed the large tear on the side of his left hip, along with a bleeding bash. You must have not noticed it by the way he was bending over. Your hand flys to cover your mouth as you stare at it, it wasn’t life threatening, but it sure as hell looked painful. “Oh my god, what happened!?”
“Oh this? Pff, it’s nothing” His left hand goes to cover the gash from your view as his right hand goes to wave the question of, his tone nonchalantly as if he had just gotten a paper cut. Now it’s your turn to glare at him.
“Can you let me help you patch it up at least?” You asked, but you were already guiding him to sit on your half done bed. “I’m not a medic or anything, but I can at least clean it up so it doesn’t get infected.” You added, going towards your bathroom to search for your first aid kid that all the dorms had.
Once you found the kit, and didn’t hear any protest from the spider, you made your way down to your knees to his left and began to clean up the wound, murmuring a silent apology when he winced from the rubbing alcohol making context with the wound.
“…You must get tired of having to always clean yourself up and restitch your suit all the time huh?” You finally broke the silence,tossing the blood and alcohol soaked cotton in your small trash can.
“It’s…yeah, sorry about, badgering in and stuff, I wouldn’t have stopped by if I didn’t think I couldn’t make it home.” His admission made your heart sink a bit, but it wasn’t completely true, his building was another few minutes of a swing from yours, and his brother always helped him clean up after a nasty fight.
Miguel just wanted an excuse to see you and talk to you again.
“You’ve saved my life twice, Spider-Man. You are always welcome to stop by if you need help.” You tell him ernstly as you wiped off the last bit of blood off his hip, before going to place wrapping on the area.
“Thank you…” He whispered, his tone just as gentle as it was the first time he spoke to you when he reassured you he wouldn’t let you go.
“Of course.”
—
Taglist: @famouscattale @oharasfilipinawife @mxltifxnd0m @loser-alert @homewreckingwreck @dumb-gemini @cowboylikeevie @thedevax @codenameredkrystalmatrix
#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel o hara fanfic#miguel o'hara#miguel o’hara au#spiderman 2099 x reader#astv miguel#astv spiderman 2099#miguel spiderverse#love me or hate me fanfic#academic rivals au#atsv miguel#miguel ohara spiderman#miguel ohara#miguel fanfic#miguel x reader
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i am a whole universe in my self. and you are a whole universe in yours.
individually, we lack nothing. together, we can become something greater. without one another, there's simply nothing missing.
i've always been aware of the fact that society makes us feel incomplete if we do not have a partner. i have always found the idea of being incomplete without someone to love me and call mine, as absolutely absurd.
i remember vividly how back in high school all of my girlfriends were just obsessed with finding (and wooing) guys to enter into relationships with. and that always made me go????
why do you feel so comfortable in attaching your worth and gaining validation from the fact that you have a partner?
you came alone in this world and you will die alone. this is not said to sound gloomy and lonely, but to embrace the very truth of life.
love is worthwhile. i was, am and always will be a hopeless romantic.
i've had two close affairs with love and both have filled me up and shattered my heart but i still will choose to love till my dying breath.
this in no way means that not having a partner makes me feel half. oh no. even the thought of giving space to such a notion in my life sounds blasphemous to me- to who i am and what i stand for as a person.
i know the love i carry in my being is deeper than the deepest oceans of the world. i know my light is the brightest fkn light in this whole world. this is my statement, my fact-of-the-matter. i know it because i have felt it. i felt it when i simply chose to pour it all in from a very young age.
of course, i long for someone's love atm. but that's because i found it adding value to my already very full, flowing and scrumptious life..
i have never been half, i've never been a part of something other than me.
that's why i know that when i am pining for someone's love, it's simply because i like the idea of what it adds to my life. nothing's missing. if you come and choose to love me, it's an addition in my life that i will wholeheartedly accept and nurture.
if you decide to decline my love, i will simply say your name every time i pray and thank the universe for making me feel more love in an already vast ocean i was living in.
#musings#writing#spilled writing#light academia#spilled words#spilled ink#spilled thoughts#my words#words words words#my thoughts#writerscorner#writersblr#writer stuff#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#writing community#writeblr#to loveる#to love is to be changed#to love and be loved#on writing#thoughts#personal#feelings#journaling#dear diary#diary entry#missing pieces#writerblr#universe
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Do you have any advice on how to get your ideas down? You know, I would stare down at an empty document, having the whole story in my head, but I just can't put it into words. The most vivid thing in my head cames out like "Emily-Claire felt the whole world shatter, the truth starts to set in. No it can't be. IT CAN'T BE! The girl sank to her knees burying her head into her late mother's shirt." *proceeds to rewrite the whole thing 13 times*
An aspiring writer,
Sereia
Oooh, this is a great question!
I would say that there's not one right way to get your first draft down. It's a first draft! All it has to do is be on the page. If you have the whole story in your head but it's not translating into fully written sentences, don't worry about writing full sentences! See if you can convey even a fraction of what you're thinking with bullet points, incomplete sentences, and/or brackets saying stuff like [she cries, write the details later].
You can get visual with it too. Have the perfect idea for a setting, but have no idea how to describe it? Find a picture that looks right, slap it in your document, and start writing like the setting has already been introduced. Later, you can go back and describe it (and the picture might help with this, as you can point to individual, tangible details). You can also do this with character appearances if struggling to describe them is blocking you from writing what comes after.
My biggest piece of advice to you would be to not focus on perfection. You can write what you think is bad and sloppy and incorrect! You don't have to show your first draft to anyone. I think there's this misconception of good writers sitting down and banging out a beautiful story on their first try. That couldn't be further than the truth (and if you don't believe me, hear it from the authors themselves!) If you want to write something you're proud of, you ahve to give yourself permission to have it suck at the beginning. Because you can always edit it into something you're proud of!
And if it helps you let go of perfection... don't feel constrained by writing the story exactly how it appears in your head. Try writing the main character having a snack with her best friend (or another scenario that feels applicable). Maybe it never shows up in the story, but it's good practice for seeing how the main character interacts with the world. And if it's just meant as a writing exercise and will never be a part of the story, then it certainly doesn't have to be perfect!
If you want a bigger challenge: once you start writing whatever scene you write next, don't rewrite anything until the scene is complete. It can be short! But if you're so caught up on editing each sentence as it comes, you're going to have a hard time feeling free enough to write imperfectly. Actually, I would advise you not to edit anything until it's been a day since you've written it. I've found that separating my "writing time" and my "editing time" not only helps me write with abandon, but it gives me enough time away from my writing to come into editing with fresh eyes.
One thing that can help with getting into the flow is starting with a free write. This is where you just write stream of consciousness, about whatever you're thinking—what you had for breakfast, how cute your crush is, etc.—but you write without stopping. Once you're in a flow, it can be easier to transition into writing your story rather than sitting down to do it. Think of it how athletes stretch before they work out, and some artists do drawing exercises before they start working on their main piece. You've got to warm up first!
But really, don't beat yourself up over not being able to get everything on the page at once. Writing is hard, and like most things, it takes practice. Just take it day by day, do what you can, and don't be afraid to try something new or unconventional. You've got this!
And my asks are open if you want any further advice!
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You taught me the courage of stars.... before you left
Megumi Fushiguro x Itadori Yuji / One-Shot / Pure Angst
a/n : Based on the song "Saturn" by Sleeping at Last, I got this idea and couldn't stop crying while writing
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Megumi stood alone on the training ground. The stars twinkled above him, like luminous reminders of a bygone era. He was deep in thought, his eyes scanning the sky obscured by intermittent clouds.
He had always found solace in the starry sky, a peaceful refuge where he could escape and reflect. But on this night, melancholy permeated every star, and his heart was heavy.
Memories flooded into his mind. The evenings spent training here, the wind gently caressing their skin, the laughter they shared as they tried to improve their technique. He remembered how Yuji would point to the constellations, naming the stars with enthusiasm even though he only knew a few of them. Yuji was always like that, passionate, living every moment as if he knew time was running out.
But now Yuji was gone. His presence had faded, leaving Megumi alone in the darkness.
He sat down on the hard floor of the training ground, his hands resting on his knees. The stars seemed to flicker, as if he could hear Yuji whispering words of encouragement to him, words of love through the veil of night.
He remembered the day they died. The day they all died. The look in Yuji's eyes as he accepted his fate, sacrificing his life to put an end to Sukuna. Megumi had been there, powerless, unable to do anything to save the one he loved. The one who had taken possession of his heart and protected him against all odds.
The pain was still fresh, like a wound that refused to heal. He wondered how he could go on without Yuji by his side. How could he find any meaning in life when his heart was shattered into a million pieces ?
He looked up at the stars, his eyes brimming with tears that he refused to let fall. He remembered the promises they had made to each other, the dreams they had. They imagined a future together, a life where they could be strong and free. The world was waiting for them.
Now it was all a distant memory.
"Yuji…" he whispered into the darkness. "Why did you leave?"
He wished he could feel Yuji's warm presence beside him again, gazing up at the stars as if they were the only inhabitants of the universe. But now, each star reminded him of his loneliness, his grief.
The stars seemed to be twinkling, as if they were trying to communicate something to Megumi. Maybe they were the words Yuji would have wanted to say to him if he were still here. Maybe the whole universe shared his pain.
Megumi closed his eyes, desperately trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. He remembered every detail of Yuji, every laugh, every look of love.
He remembered with bitterness how far away those moments seemed now. He had always felt that he would end up alone, abandoned by those he loved. It was as if his whole life had been a series of gradual losses, an accumulation of voids that only deepened.
He had never really felt that he belonged in this world. Even before Yuji, he'd lost too much. His father, his mother, his sister, his father again. Each departure had left a painful mark on his already fragile heart. But Yuji had changed all that. With Yuji, Megumi felt his heart open up again. He had finally found someone who understood him without the need for words, someone with whom he could share his sorrows and hopes. They had become more than friends, more than lovers - they had become soul mates.
And now Yuji had been torn away from him, like all the others before him. Megumi wondered if he was doomed to a life of loneliness and loss. Perhaps it was his destiny to be always abandoned, always left behind as those he loved drifted away.
Always left in the shadows, waiting for the sun to shine again.
———————
For you Élise, my heart that left too soon, I wait every day for the sun to rise. I hope you found what you were looking for, I'll love you forever, you were the biggest fan of Megumi x Yuji and I hope you liked this, I love you angel
#fanfic#fanfiction#request#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen megumi#jujutsu megumi#jjk megumi#megumi fushiguro#yuji itadori#jjk yuji#jujutsu yuji#megumi x yuji
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Ozqrow Week - Day 2 - Stargazing
“Keep meaning ta ask, Oz… what was it like, back then? Looking up at all the stars while the moon was still whole? I figured if anyone would know the answer to that, then it would be you. Well, or a certain other person, but that… never mind.” Qrow trailed off, embarrassed, even as Oz’s face seemed to shutter slightly. The smile he shot Qrow was as gentle as always though, his eyes just as loving as they ever were.
“How to explain a sight you’ll never see, I wonder? The moon has been shattered for so many lifetimes now that the vision of it whole is more an echo than anything else, really, but it was beautiful none the less. Imagine a perfect ball, shining the way our moon does now, illuminating the world around it like a luminescent torch. Imagine that same ball, reflected in a lake, rippling and indistinct yet whole at the same time. Then imagine waking up in a world where that ball had broken, been shattered at the whim of a temperamental God throwing a tantrum. Forgive me, but in many ways, that was what must have happened. Only a God could shatter it in such a way that it would remain as it is without flying apart or recombining.” Oz winced even as he let his mouth run away from him, but it was a painful thing to remember really, back when the world had been so much newer, only one version of humanity. Back when there had been nothing but faith and hope, before everything had gone so very wrong.
Qrow stared at him for a second in shock. “So you don’t actually know how it broke, then?”
“I was not there to witness it, Qrow, that was before the Gods decided that bringing Ozma back was a good idea… long before they cursed him and thus all of the cycle as they did. Sometimes all I really want to do is rest, but I know that the task… even if I die, I’ll just wake up as someone else. Apologies, this is too heavy a conversation tonight, after all, we were watching the stars were we not? Did you know that the constellations themselves have changed?” The last sentence was spoken lightly, the change of subject desperately needed and Qrow latched on to it like a lifeline.
“Constellations can change, Oz?”
“Oh my, yes. They keep getting given different names as the patterns people see change and evolve. I could sketch out the various patterns at some point, if you’re interested? It might be something that would be a good idea anyway, thinking on it. It’s always better to have records, just in case the cycle actually does end any time soon.” Oz sighed, he really hadn’t meant to bring down the mood, but Qrow’s question had more or less done that for him already. He moved closer to him, still staring up at the stars that most people viewed as so very unchanging.
Everything altered given enough time. All things changed, mountains formed or were ground down, the sky itself ultimately as mutable as the rest of it. Everything ended, except for him, except for his curse. This was not his night…
Qrow made an indistinct noise as Oz moved to within hugging distance, still trying to wrap his head around what Oz had said about the stars, it was so strange to think they were actually changeable. Whatever was on his lover's mind though, at least tonight they were together?
#ozqrowweek2023#qrow branwen#ozpin#professor ozpin#rwby ozpin#headmaster ozpin#cloqwork#ozqrow week#stargazing#introspection#sadder than i thought
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☰ and ☆ for anyone you'd like :3c
Summer Starters
☰ for our muses to take a stroll along a seaside boardwalk at a summer carnival
"You didn't lie when you said this island was huge..."
"Well duh, I picked it myself for a reason."
It was summer vacation and Sylva took Adore on a trip to that Island she owned and maintained... yet everything was a bit overwhelming for her girlfriend to think Sylva owns all this. Both got themselves candied apples and walked along the boardwalk looking at the big ferris wheel on the side.
"I mainly bought this place at first to play beach volleyball in peace.... then came pools, little shops, locations, party houses, and the more wishes and ideas the people had, the most we built it up, babe. "
Sylva stretcher her arms and looked back at her.
"Which means I can give you a tour and tonight I tell you some date spots you can pick."
"Hmm... can't we just enjoy the sunset at the beach?"
"Anything for ya... Oh but I do know where we can eat later... but for now."
She pointed towards the see, even if the carnivals music dimmed the experience, seeing the fish and the ocean was calming, Adore closed her eyes as she felt Sylvas arm around her hips, seeing her give a cheeky smile.
"Its great... I understand why you come here... the atmosphere is wonderfull for a date."
"Given yer plans... maybe if you have some lovebirds we can bring then here too... it be fun to see if you can wingman them."
"It would mean a lot if you allow me."
"Then its a deal, but for now, let me enjoy time with my pretty girlfriend."
She pulled her closer and kissed her neck shortly before smiling back.
"Come on, lets go enjoy some of the Carnival rides."
☆ for our muses to watch fireworks together
At first he thought this would be boring... Francine was already asleep and many of the RSA students sat down doing nothing.... Barry sat next to Edgar and hoped not to die from boredom... he himself disliked that he could look over, feel his heart beat quickly just to know that he could never tell him... he could never actually tell he loved him without it only causing trouble for him. He started to close his eyes and think of some of the superhero he enjoys... untill he felt the light explode into the sky.
"Its beautiful..." He heard Edgar say next to him...
"At least something happens... we waited forever."
No reaction... maybe the whole fire work drowned out his voice... maybe for his heart he could use this... maybe telling his feelings and hoping nobody would hear it over the fire works was the way to get some weight of his shoulders.
He looked a little bit more on how the fireworks blew up in the sky and looked back at him.. fumbling fingers thinking about everything.
And so he took the risk, turned to Edgar and waited till one explosion went off.
"I love you..."
"You do?"
Suddenly his whole world shattered... was the explosion actually not loud enough, blood rushed to his head and he grew nervous trying to escape the situation.
"Y-YOU HEARD THAT WRONG I SAID NOTHING!" And on instinct Barry dashed away... hidding nearby behind a tree and taking his breath... he could have risked everything cause of one dumb move... why did he have to feel that way... and so he sat down and watched the firework from afar... hoping nobody will find him crying in secret like this.
#twisted wonderland oc#twst oc#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland ocs#twst#disney twst#twst ocs#twistedwonderland#twistedwonderlandoc#sylva mercury#sylva x adore#barry parton#barry x edgar
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REFLECTIONS IN A SHATTERED MIRROR
Journal Entry #1 June 23, 2024
I remembered that night, he broke me. My vision went vivid that night. Everything went downhill. The way my heart break into millions of pieces. Where did we go wrong? Where did I go wrong? I thought everything was fine. I thought we were fine. Oh, I was wrong. He was already broken before he broke me. I didn’t understand him well. I swear I was trying my best for him, ALL THIS WHOLE TIME?! I sacrificed everything for him. One lesson I learned that night, distance doesn’t kill a relationship but lack of communication does. Please, I am begging on my knees please bring him back to me. Please give him back to me. I’d do anything. This was my first time loving a person with my whole heart. As the crystal-clear water fell down from my eyes, I prayed for this man to come back to me. The love of my life, my everything.
-maiy-
Journal Entry #2 June 30, 2024
It’s been a week since we broke up.
I admitted that I thought everything was going to be fine but I WAS WRONG. How in the world can someone lost 5kg within a week? IN A WEEK?! I barely could eat anything. I lost my appetite for a whole week. Every time I ate something, I ended up throwing up everything. I couldn’t believe the pain of losing someone can be this painful. It ruined my days. I tried to do something that can distracted my mind. I went on a jogged, bris walk every morning but I still felt very hollow. Everything I did felt empty. Just like a body without any soul in it. I am tired of everything. All I wanted was for him to come back to me. I wished for my prayers to be answered every night.
-maiy-
Journal Entry #3 July 4, 2024
I am such a fool. I knew it was not a good idea. Why did I reached out to someone who threw me away? Why am I the one who begged him to come back ? I can’t believe I disrespect myself this bad. Harsh truth was hurt but I need to continue my life as It doesn’t ended when my first relationship fell apart. I promised to myself to do better in the future. I promised to prioritize myself first.
There’s always that one person, the one who could have been everything but slipped through your fingers. Time moved fast, and before you could grasp the gravity of what they meant, they were gone. They are the bittersweet memory, lingering at the edges of your thoughts, a "what if" that replays in quiet moments. You wonder how different life might be if circumstances had aligned just a little differently. Perhaps they were never meant to stay, only to teach you the value of love, timing, and letting go. And though they’re gone, they’ll forever be the one who got away.
-maiy-
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CHAPTER TWO
A New York highway. An army blockade is preventing traffic from entering the city. There’s an abundance of armed military units and barbed wire, but not everybody is getting the message. A disgruntled truck driver steps out of his vehicle and marches right up to the blockade, where a crowd of scared and confused people have already gathered.
DRIVER: Hey, Rambo! What’s the big idea?
SOLDIER: Sir, you need to return to your vehicle and go back the way you came. The city is off-limits.
DRIVER: What’s the big emergency?
SOLDIER: Some sort of invasion. The whole city’s under attack, and New York may not be the only target.
DRIVER: So then, what are you goons doin’ out here, disruptin’ my deliveries, when there’s a freakin’ war being fought on Main Street?
SOLDIER: Orders from Commander Rogers himself: nobody gets in, and everybody gets out. Now, you…and all you folks here…need to turn around and go home! This is a military operation, and its not safe for you people to-
BOOM! Something explodes a few miles behind the blockade. No sooner does panic set in than three flying tentacled beasts come screeching across the skies. Riding on their backs are the grey-skinned creatures glimpsed in the city. They wheel overhead and open fire on all below, civilian and soldier alike. An army sergeant barks his orders.
SERGEANT: Hostiles in the sky! Weapons free! Light ‘em up!
The soldiers return fire as the civilians run for cover. Its chaos. Suddenly, a yellow laser beam pops the head off one of the riders. Another shoots one of the beasts in the eye, sending it crashing onto the freeway. As the surviving assailant swings his mount to hunt this new foe, a red and yellow blur bursts through the skull of the beast he’s riding, and a red gauntlet smashes into his face. As the last of the aliens go down, all eyes turn to the sky once again. There, gleaming in a floating suit of red and gold armour is Tony Stark, the invincible Iron Man.
STARK: Do what the man says folks. Go home and stay there. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a really important call to get to,
And with a whoosh, he’s gone, flying like a fighter jet off into the city.
A tracking shot of Iron Man as he swoops around skyscrapers and fires repulsor beams at the aliens. Eventually, he lands in the conference room of Avengers Tower, coming through a window that was smashed in the fighting.
STARK: Morning, Avengers.
ROGERS: Tony, good, we’re ready to begin.
The large table where the Avengers usually meet has been upturned to face the shattered windows to act as a makeshift barrier. At the back of the room is another huge TV screen, displaying multiple satellite views, infra-red shots and news reports. Around the room are the few Avengers that were present in the tower at the time of attack; the current Captain America, Bucky Barnes…the Protector, the alien warrior Noh-Varr…Spider-man and Spider-woman, Jessica Drew…winged hero the Falcon, and Maria Hill.
STARK; Uh, where’s Thor?
MARIA: He lives in Asgard, and they don’t have phones there.
ROGERS: He’s en route. I made the call.
MARIA: What? Just like that?
ROGERS: I said the words, he’ll be here. Now, down to business. At approximately 0600 hours, New York and perhaps the world was invaded by an army of previously unknown alien life-forms…
SPIDER-MAN: “previously unknown”?
ROGERS: Yes. Using intel collected from the databanks of Reed Richards, S.H.I.E.L.D, S.W.O.R.D., and Noh-Varr here, we’ve deduced that this species isn’t Kree, Skrull, Shi-‘ar, Titan, Martian, Sakarrian, Brood or any other we’ve got catalogues on.
STARK: Could it be something…supernatural, instead?
ROGERS: We had our mystics check into that as well. I didn’t like that they were able to gain entry into our atmosphere without any real spacecraft, so I got everybody I could think of investigating teleportation spells large enough to transport armies. Unfortunately, there were no “mystical disturbances” in this dimension. At this early stage, we have to conclude that this is an invasion from another universe.
BUCKY: My God…
ROGERS: All attempts to contact them have failed. They aren’t interested in talking. Whether they’re doing this for resources, or territory, or some warped religious dogma, we can’t tell. Nor can we tell how they got here, how many of them there are, or…
He breaks off for a minute. The group watches him patiently as he composes himself.
ROGERS: the good news is, they’ve pushed us to the point where we can make it real simple for them. The U.N.’s stance on unwarranted extra-terrestrial attacks is surprisingly straightforward. Give them no quarter. Those bastards have come here to kill and destroy. Your job is to stop that from happening. Help any civilians you find that are hurt or in trouble, but right now holding back the attack is the priority. You’re the front line, Avengers. Move out.
The Avengers begin to file out the window. Falcon and Protector fly out first. Spider-man pauses for a second.
SPIDER-MAN: Another day, another alien invasion.
He leaps out the window. Tony turns to Steve.
STARK: Where are the Fantastic Four?
ROGERS: Reed, Sue, Johnny and the kids are on vacation in the 1600s, but Ben Grimms staying with Cage’s team at the Mansion, who are already in the field.
STARK: Damn it. The world’s leading expert on multi-dimensional travel is in another time the day we got attacked by…what are we calling them, anyway?
ROGERS: Due to their frenzied attacking style and possible hive mind mentality, we’ve coined the name “Locust”
BUCKY: A swarm of Locusts. Great.
ROGERS: Bucky, wait. I’m keeping you in reserve for the time being.
BUCKY: You’re what?
ROGERS: This room is our nerve centre. I need you on site to defend it while I co-ordinate the fight.
BUCKY: Fine. But I’m gonna need more than your old shield and my M-9.
Steve walks over to a space in the wall. He holds his palm against it. A whirring sound comes from behind it and a portion of the wall slides away to reveal a fully-stocked gun cabinet with fire-arms of various makes and sizes.
ROGERS: This should help.
KRA-BOOM.. thunder rolls and bangs across the sky. For a moment, all noise outside the tower stops. Then, hurtling out of the dark, stormy sky like a falling star comes Thor, God of Thunder. With a force that shakes Avengers Tower right to the roof, he strikes his hammer to the earth and sends lightning shooting out to scorch all Locust within fifty feet.
ROGERS: See? Told you he’d be here.
END.
#fanfic#fanfiction#creative writing#marvel#creative#the avengers#fanfic friday#crossover#gears of war#thor#steve rogers#captain america#bucky barnes#iron man#spiderman#spider woman#maria hill
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Manifestation of a monster (chapter 27)
The masked people were concealed in the church's shadows. Hiding their faces, like something out of a B-movie slasher. They all gathered around a ring of lighted candles and stood in a circle, chanting. As soon as Malachi walked into the room, silence fell. Ma'at rested in his arms. As all eyes turned to them, silence fell.
"I present to you, the Goddess Ma'at," Malachi said, delicately placing her in one of the rigid conference chairs. Despite the cushions that had been placed in preparation for her arrival, It felt like she was sitting on rocks. She was attempting to relax, but every time she moved, something snapped. It was impossible to know if the popping noises she was hearing were caused by gas bubbles in her joints or by her bones shattering beneath the weight of her muscles. She would be bedridden or worse if it weren't for her amazing capacity to heal.
Obviously, she wouldn't be here today if she didn't have the ability to heal. They would have mummified her. Possibly on display for all to see. However, she doubted her outward look was too far away. Her sunken eyes and dry, wrinkled face made her a perfect fit for the role.
The test respondents looked at her in shock and awe.To the contrary of her type, she did not try to hide the supernatural nature of her gifts. For the most part, people were uneasy about it at first. However, they preferred that she not be human. They interpreted this sensation as confirmation that she was, in fact, a deity, and she made no effort to disabuse them of this notion.
"Humans and vampires alike had been sinning without punishment for far too long." She drew herself to her feet, clutching on the chair's arms and equally spreading her weight between them and her legs so she didn't break them. "We'll breed individuals who hold everyone else accountable for their actions. And it's my own flesh and blood that gives me the ability to do all of this."
She was uninterested in the humans. She was completely emotionless when speaking with them. They didn't seem to notice, though. They cheered as though she was making a rallying call before a battle. In actuality, she was uninterested in any of them. Her primary focus was the assassination of the elders. They are the ones that started this whole thing. Those who had imprisoned her had long ago fled the physical world. To top it all off, she already had a plan in place to get rid of them all. She had completed one of the numerous requirements she had set for herself in order to be truly content.
***
"Wait, are you saying he’s just been sleeping in there for days?” Amy asked as she pulled her shirt on. Justin nodded as he actively fixed the buckle of his pants. “Wait, hasn’t Milo still been sleeping in there? Are they an item?”
Justin gave a shrug. He didn't bother trying to hide the fact that he still felt slighted by the intrusion. "I have no idea what the fuck they are." Just then, Milo walked in with a paperback and four coffee cups in a drink holder.
Justin glared and pointed furiously toward the bathroom, saying, "Your friend is up. He was wearing nothing."
Milo's response was a dry "oh. I assumed he would continue to sleep for a while longer.” He set down the cups and gave the door a glance. He then handed Amy and Justin their drinks, which was an unexpectedly nice gesture for him.
"Amy and I saw it all." Justin gestured towards his groyne area. "Without even knocking, he strolled right in. The likes of things have no place in Amy's life."
He looked at Amy in complete confusion "Please accept my apologies. Believe me when I say he is harmless. You shouldn't worry about him at all. He doesn't always consider the consequences of his actions."
"Amy doesn't need to be exposed to that." Said Justin in an angry rant. Just the two of us here wouldn't be OK. More so, Amy shouldn't have to deal with any of that while she's here. It doesn't matter how 'harmless' he claims to be, Wich; I know he's not. She doesn't need to see your boyfriend's dick all over.
Milo strolled right inside the restroom, completely unconcerned by Justin's statements, picking up the paper bag he had put on the floor seconds earlier.
***
When Milo entered the little bathroom, Grendel was fast asleep in the tub. It was out of this world to see him. It had just been a few months, and under different circumstances, it wouldn't even count as much time. But nothing was usual. Being ill, a sensation Milo had long forgotten, as well as the loneliness. Making it through each day felt like it took years.
But none of that mattered. It was necessary to make progress. And he was sick and tired of living in the same house as Justin. He paused for a while before stooping down to switch on the cold spicket.
"Fucking monkey balls," Grendel yelped as he waded to the back of the tub, where the water was still quite warm.
Milo said quietly as he turned off the water. "Oh, you've woken up. good. Sorry for bothering you, but you will have to answer for a few things."
Grendel rubbed his hands over his face and murmured, "It wasn't my fault." Milo stayed silent as he sat on the toilet next to him, allowing him to continue. "And even if I had a hand in it (which I don't), no one could blame me and-" He gradually began to stutter. He threw himself back into the tub. "The water is fucking cold now," he grumbled.
Milo learned that remaining silent was the greatest approach to getting information from him on occasion. "It was chilly before I came in here." And, no, I'm not interested in that subject. At least not at the moment. We'll go back to that later."
He expected to feel better after seeing Grendel. And it had, in some ways. But something was wrong, even now. He was so far away that he barely saw him, despite the fact that he was standing right next to him.
"Where is everyone?" Milo said hesitantly, as though terrified of the replies. He couldn't pick up on anyone. For a while, he was concerned that they had all been destroyed. With the new world's technologies. This did not appear implausible. He couldn't conceive what his life would be like without them.
But what may have worried him more was if they were still there. And he had no idea what was going on just next to him. What would happen to him? Feeding was growing increasingly difficult by the day. At the current rate. He may not live for past the next few years, or perhaps months.
"I brought you clothing," Milo remarked, pointing to the bag next to the bath.
Grendel leaned over the side of the tub, his arms dangling. "I'm hoping it's more current than what you're wearing. Buffy would have you marked in under five minutes."
"I don't know what that implies," Milo groaned. His speech was like a riddle you had to solve every time he spoke. Trying to decipher his intended message from the torrent of incomprehensible gibberish that kept flowing out of his mouth. Analogies that failed to connect because they were drawn from too wide a range of historical periods.
Milo advised Grendel as he went out the door, "Remember not to breathe in any of the water," as he collapsed back into the tub and his head sank beyond the water's surface. Even the deepest ocean would not have killed him. He discovered the hard way, however, that having fluid in one's lungs was not a nice experience.
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