#and feeling like im fucking suffocating

[magnoliamyrrh]

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[lets-all-calm-down-a-bit]

yeah. anyways-

[starheirxero]

I saw what you said about Jack and Bloodmoon👀 I SEE YOU ARE TRYING TO BREAK MY HEART-

WE'LL IT'S WORKING- But it also got me thinking👀

There's something so deeply unsettling about Bloodmoon's situation. It's an inner, deep rooted horror!

They have always been two, working as one. And despite their hunger, despite their violence, they worked in perfect harmony, never fighting for control. Or anything, for that matter.

Imagine: You wake up. You are surrounded by the abyss, and your body is aching.

You are hungry, so hungry, it drives you to insanity. So hungry, you want to claw off your skin. So hungry, you want to rip out your insides.

But then there is someone else. They are inside of you. A part of you, yet someone else.

And they understand. They feel the same hunger. Their body aches the same, for theirs is yours, and yours is theirs. You are the same.

You are one. You can hear their voice inside your head, and feel their presence tingle underneath your skin. There is a presence inside of you, and it turns your insides warm. It eases the hunger, eases the pain, just enough to make it bearable.

There is a constant presence inside of you, and your head is never quiet. It is always filled with thoughts, some from you, some from them. Sometimes, they will respond to an idea of yours. Sometimes, you tease them for thinking something silly.

Sometimes your body is heavy, and they will gently tug you back. Their presence is no longer beneath your skin. Instead, it surrounds you, their warmth swallowing you whole. They will think of something to make you laugh, because they are a part of you, and know you better than you know yourself. And when you laugh, you feel their lips, yet your own as well, quirk up into a smirk.

You are never trapped, because you're always free to take control, and they will let you, because they trust you, and you are as much a part of them as they are of you.

You are still hungry, but you are not alone in this hunger. Instead, together, you do anything to fill it, hunting down prey. And when you are unsuccessful, they will simply tug you back, and reassure you, telling you you'll catch it next time.

This is your whole life. From the moment, that you first opened your eyes in the abyss, they were with you.

You do not know loneliness, for they are a part of you. Even as you are used and betrayed, time and time again, you do not learn the meaning of loneliness. Because they are right there with you, feeling the same pain. You can hear their thoughts, their anger, their wrath, yet they never lash out at you, rather killing a rat you've stumbled across. Likewise, you're own thoughts are leaping waves, crashing against your skull and leaving you two with a numb ache. But you are not alone, there is a buzzing beneath your skin, and you find them pulling you in. They do not come out, leaving your shared body leaning against a wall, as their warmth surrounds you. "I am here." they tell you. "I'm not leaving." you reassure. You will never know loneliness.

Except then you do.

You are separated. At first, you do not notice the silence, still high on adrenaline and bloodlust, high on seeing you sibling, your other half, face to face. But then you lose you fight, and there is no one to reassure you, to tell you "good job", or take over and finish it for you.

Suddenly, you become aware of the emptiness. The presence underneath your skin is gone, leaving you freezing. You feel your stomach rumble, but no one notices, no one shares it.

Your head is silent. Their voice is gone. Their presence is gone. You can only hear yourself, and you are left reeling. You feel like a stranger in your own skin, a husk who has lost it's soul.

Then you are told, they won't come back.

The buzzing in your flesh will not return. The warmth inside of you will never save you from the cold again. The voices inside your head are gone for eternity.

The presence inside and around you has left. For the first time in your life, you are truly, and utterly alone.

And you are left feeling like nothing but a parasite in your own shell, for there are meant to be two, not one.

Just imagine: there is a constant weight on top and inside of you, like a weighted blanket, and a voice filling your head. And one day, the weight is gone, and your head is quiet, for the first time since you can remember.

But it's not a relief. The weight was a comfort, and the voice was your friend. They were familiar, and all you've ever known. There was never an existence without either.

-Stardust

HELLO STARDUST ANON HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME I AM IN SHAMBLES

I don't even have any additional thoughts you literally worded this all spectacularly. The second Bloodmoon wasn't even technically supposed to be there, but they latched onto each other all the same and worked their existence around each other. They were comfortable and they were familiar and they were happy :(((

UGH THATS SO FUCKED UP. I'M GUNNA BE THINKING ABOUT THIS FOREVER NO ONE TOUCH ME

[bunnihearted]

i cant fully control my emotions during a breakdown and then i come out of it and im like oh fuck........ ._.

[nonsensethoughtz]

to all the people who voted for their conscience instead of the good of the country, i hope you're happy. i'm sure trump will help the people in palestine right after he denies life saving medical procedures to women.

[iftitah]

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[pleasedontcareaboutme]

i posted that stupid shit on my instagram i might just kill myself fr

now im afraid i wont sleep for another 24 hours damn 😭😭

[friendly-neighborhood-furry]

the dashboard unfucker plugin i had doesn't work anymore and its stopped being updated so now i am forced to look at tumblr cosplaying as twitter for all of eternity

if i was any better at coding i'd do something about it but i have executive dysfunction and learning how to code all over again ON TOP OF everything else i have to do right now i think it would send me over the edge

[pendraegon]

being bipolar is so like. bitch i really live like this huh

[galaxywarp]

I am really…really depressed right now. Can someone say something comforting to me…?

[orcelito]

The upstairs thumping started again around midnight, right when I started trying to sleep. It's even more infuriating when I have to be up at 7 am. I've been getting absolute dogshit sleep this week, and it's largely because of them. It's been 4 nights in a row, and I am So Fucking Tired.

I'm going to leave a note on their door tomorrow asking them to stop. And if they do it again tomorrow, I'm submitting a noise complaint. I don't fucking care.

[milo-is-rambling]

I think I’m always going to be running and trying to find the next thing that will make me happy and it will always be something I have to find within myself. So that’s cool.

[fridayiminlcve]

if i dont move to nyc or london or paris by age 27 what is the point of anything

[weldfists]

thinking abt sett and cannibalism as a metaphor for love

[girlthativealwaysbeen]

what is wrong with my dad i hope he dies man wtf😭

[bunnihearted]

god the knowing that nobody truly loves me or wants me around is so painful like i just wanna die im all alone in this world and how are u even supposed to live when you're unloved and unwanted by everyone