#and I’ll get people telling me ‘no shit sherlock!’

[stump-salsa]

Piece of shit 2000

[hyuckswoman]

« yoo, how are you? » mark asks waiting by your desk as you collect your stuff 

« when did you even get there??? also we’ve been texting the whole time you know how i am » 

« my class ended a bit early so i waited by the door and when people were leaving i thought i’d just come in, also it’s called courtesy the whole asking how you’re doing, so stop complaining this is me being nice » mark says as you both head out of the class 

« righhtttt my bad sir , where are we going by the way? I don’t have classes for the rest of the day so I’m free if you want to hang out » you say 

« I told you to stop flirting with me, you’re getting desperate and it shows » mark jokes as you slightly punch his arm 

« we could grab lunch if you want to? also i don’t know where your friend is, i don’t think i saw him in your classroom but we can wait for him if you’d like » mark says looking around for hanbin you presume 

« Bin went to a party last night, he sent me a text this morning he’s wasted and hungover and basically skipped class so we don’t have to wait for him this time, also i wouldn’t act like I’m the one that likes you too much given how you practically begged me not to leave the music group » you said trying to get back at him. It was kinda annoying how he shrugged and told you that you were right without fighting back tho. 

« where the fuck are you taking me? this looks too expensive i don’t have that kind of money » you say as you guys near mark’s recommendation. you make a mental note to never trust the guy ever again when he tells you he knows a place

«  don’t worry, i got the bill » he says

« man, you’re as broke as I am don’t even pretend with this gentleman shit » you say laughing 

« dude you could’ve at least pretended for my ego, you suck. also it might look super fancy but it’s affordable don’t worry, not that i’d let you pay for your meal tho, i might be broke but I still know how to treat a lady thank you » he says holding the door of the establishment open for you 

«  I will wrestle you to the cash register don’t even play with me marcus lee » you say trailing behind him as he chuckles. you wonder if he’s making fun of your threat or if he’s laughing because of the nickname (the answer is both)

you were halfway through your meal when mark started to speak again 

« man.. isn’t it kinda crazy? » he says looking at you 

« what is? » you answer genuinely confused.. did this man think you’re sherlock holmes or something?? how would you know what he’s even talking about 

«  it’s kinda crazy how you, my diehard fan managed to be in the same music group as me. you hide your game pretty well though, sometimes i forget that you’re the president of my fan club » he says, you could see him holding back his laugh so hard. crazy how this man was openly making fun of you like that 

«  what happened to ‘let’s not talk about this ever again’? also, considering how you’ve been hyping me up these past few weeks i’d say that the roles have reversed and you’re my die hard fan now, you even said so yesterday » you reply 

« i never said any of that you are mistaking me for another man on your roster » mark answers

« let’s not lie like that we both remember the messages… and stop slut shaming me we are in public. and considering the amount of girls that want you i’d say you’re more likely to be the slut » you says hoping that’ll shut him up 

« ooo are you jealous that everybody wants me?? » he says. the answer is yes but you’ll never tell him that of course. 

« stop being so cocky before i slap that smirk off your face » you reply lowkey glaring at him

«  you didn’t deny it though » he says cockily. this man was aggravating you 

« god you’re becoming worse than hyuck. actually nevermind you are worse than hyuck constantly asking me for validation and compliments » you say smiling

« ouchhh okay i get it my bad, i’ll stop asking for validation and compliments the minute I’m 100% sure that I’m your favorite. also i don’t think it’s fair how donghyuck and jisung get to have cute nicknames while you call me marcus » he says kinda sulking 

« oh sorry my bad dork lee » you say laughing while he just gives you the middle finger « also i call you markie so you do have a cute nickname stop complaining and eat your food » you say as he just goes like « oooooh, that’s right » remembering the nickname you gave him. 

as you guys were finishing the meal you excused yourself to go to the toilet (little did he know you were actually paying the bill like the gentleman you are)

as you come back to the table you see mark trying to grab the waiter attention 

« what are you doing? stop doing that you’re giving me the ick » you say sitting back down 

« man fuck you, it’s not my fault nobody sees me i just want to pay the bill. and don’t fight me on this please » he says continuing his gesture to grab the staff’s attention 

« mark i paid the bill already that’s why no one is coming please stop » you say grabbing his hand to put it down 

« WHAT???!!!! » he replies 

« man… i can’t believe you paid the bill. next time’s one me tho » he says holding the door open for you to get out 

« is this an attempt to ask me out on a date? » you ask. yea that’s right. uno reverse bitch 

« sorry i don’t date fans » he replies. ooooooooh this man is 100% aggravating 

« by the way I texted you earlier to give you something but I’m really fucking nervous so I’ve been delaying it this whole time, but no more delaying shit I’ve got this I think. Also if you think it’s weird thennn pretend i never gave you shit ok? » he says sorta hyping himself up in the middle before opening his palm revealing a black guitar keychain 

you burst out laughing 

« I think this is worse than if you would’ve told me that you hated it. I’m literally contemplating suicide right now don’t even play with me » he says as you laugh even harder because his antics were really making it worse 

A few seconds later and in between giggles you decide to speak « no.. wait, i swear I’m not making fun of you, I swear I find this unbelievably sweet, you’ll understand why I’m laughing just give me a second » you say reaching into your bag pulling out a spiderman lego keychain you grabbed from the same store earlier to give to him as a present 

« this is for you, i bought it earlier because it reminded me of you, since you said you liked spiderman and since your twitter header is a lego character » you say finding it amusing how you both got each other a keychain

« dudeeee you need to stop doing this to me I’ll cry i love it so much, also look i got myself a guitar keychain to match yours » he says showing you the other keychain 

« i also got a keychain to match the one i got you hold on » you say showing yours 

« it’s crazy how we thought of the same thing tho, we’re like… spiritually connected » he says as the both of you start walking to head back to your apartment because even though you’ve been making fun of him for his gentleman antics, deep down (you didn’t even have to look hard to see it) mark was a good guy and no matter the time of day, he’s going to walk you back home.

you wonder if it’s because you like him but you know that if he keeps on acting the way he’s acting, this whole crush was going to be even worse than it is…

39. double matching

previous chapter masterlist next chapter

notes: ended this on sort of a cliffhanger lolll, also this is not proofread at all sooooo idk probably a bunch of mistakes i just cba

taglist : @imsiriuslyreal @iscocohere @simpforarmihn @replayenthusiast @lovm4rk @youreintheclubb @polarisjisung @sour-chaos @jising-jisang-jisung @aerivrs @multifandomania @tiddygang2020 @roseangelxfuma @skepvids @morkiee @yangasm @artstaeh @pussyslayerhd @bacons-thighs @bugcattie @leefullsun @jkslvsnella @alethea-moon @marvelahsobx @haechansbbg @katsukis1wife @winuvs @n0hyuck @whats-my-question @dojaejunging @hibernatinghamster @user7520 @m1dn1ghtv1olet @starwonb1n @lostinneocity @miniature-tragedy @llearlert @haezyhyuck @inosfavgf @bluesinfinities @calumsfringe @cigarettesafterjae @defzcl @delfdiary @minkyuncutie @bunnyjaycheoluwu @sofix-hc7

[skylarsblue]

★RDR2 Incorrect Quotes★

(If you see duplicates from my COD version of these? Shh, no you didn't) ★Border made by @fairytopea★

Ms.Grimshaw What are you doing, you oaf? Young!Arthur, staring at Y/N: They’re pretty. Ms.Grimshaw …and you’re ugly, now get back to work.

- (Pre-joining the gang) Abigail, trying to get paid: What’s your favorite color, John? John: Blue. No, green. Abigail: Awesome! I love learning about you. John: I fucked up, it’s yellow.

- Arthur, cutting a huge knot out of John’s hair: I fucked up, we gotta go bald. *head locks him still* Young!John, flailing violently: WAAAAAHHHH-

Seán: Psst, Lenny, ay mate, wake up! Lenny: Huh- Wh-what? What is it? Seán: I heard something outside the tent. Lenny: What? Seán: Like a woman crying in the distance, but I couldn’t hear her footsteps. Lenny: Okay?? What do you want me to do? Seán: Come look with me! Lenny: Hell no! Seán: Why not? Lenny: I got too much melanin and too much sense for that white people shit. You wanna let demons get you, be my guest, leave me out of it.

- (John HAD to have SOMETHING that captivated her, for humor’s sake? We’ll say he had jokes)

Abigail: You have to find my darling husband, I’m so worried about him. Arthur: Seriously, what do you see in that guy? Abigail: He makes me laugh.

- Micha: I've got the urge to say something. Arthur: And what's that? Micha: The N-Word- Arthur: WHOA-

- Bill: But seriously, is it your whole emo thing that she’s into or what? John: …yeah, long flowing straight hair, very emo.

- Karen: This- Hmm. Tilly: Be nice. Karen: I’m findin’ it. Mary-Beth: …it takes you that long to find- Karen: It does, it does.

- (O’Driscoll troubles) Kieran: Arthur we’re going to get murdered. We’re going to get murdered by a man who can’t tie a fucking bow tie. Arthur: At least he won’t torture us, can’t tie a rope either.

- John: Ugh, you know they’re gonna make us do one of those tacky family happiness photos that comes in the restaurants shitty frame. Tilly: Why are you so fucking negative all the time? John: Wh- uh- I just- Arthur: *slowly sucks tea through straw*

- Seán: Someone just said; “You’re a criminal!” Seán: *handkerchief on, gun in one hand, bag of money in the other* Seán: Well I’ll tell ya what, Sherlock Holmes. You are unbelievable.

- The Gang: Arthur is dying and Micha is a rat! Dutch, dancing with money: *insert that audio that goes “I don’t give a fuck cause I’m a ✨millionaire✨, I do what I want, middle finger in the air!”*

- John, drunk: You think the wind is ever tryna tell us something and we don’t know how to hear it anymore? Charles, loading up a drunk Arthur into a wagon: I just want you to stop saying odd shit.

- Abigail: If we lose, I’m gonna cut the judge. John: Wh- you brought your switchblade?? Abigail: Mhm. John: But they patted us down on the way in, where did you hide i- ohhhhhhh.

- Arthur: …you ever wish you could just, turn into a bird and fly away from everything? Charles: I think we need to get you to a therapist for depression. John: I’d wanna be a wolf. Charles: And we should get you psych evaluation for Autism.

- Sheriff: You seem like a reasonable and good natured person. Arthur: *looks around* And you look like you need glasses.

- Abigail: What would your father say?! Jack: Uhhh “I’ll fix it!” And then make it worse until luck comes around and makes it work, and then act like that was the plan the whole time? Abigail: …that’s my bad, I should’ve used a different phrase to express my disappointment.

- (I dunno why but John being super mean to some people is so fucking funny to me. I don't hate Bill, but bullying him is fun)

Bill: You enjoyin’ the wife everyone else paid to have? John: You mean the woman I never had to pay for? The woman who liked me so much, she didn’t ask for any money to sleep with me? In fact; she liked me so much, she married me? The woman who makes me a warm dinner and kisses me everyday? Mother of my child? John: I am enjoyin’ yeah. What about you, Bill? Bill: John: You enjoyin’ your lonely life, you unlovable sorry sack of shit? You enjoyin’ having to pay for someone to pretend they like you? Cause they never actually do. They hate you actually, like me. I hate you. Eat shit and die, Bill.

- Arthur: …him? Really? Mary-Beth Don’t be mean! Arthur: He looks like a rescue dog, Mary-Beth. Mary-Beth: I know, I like that! Arthur: ….you like that?? Mary-Beth: His pathetic wet eyes and general wimpy stature have captivated me. Arthur: *sigh* Whatever makes you happy.

- Bill: At the end of the day, Arthur. I am a MAN. Arthur: A MAN WHO’S GAY. You like fellers GETTHATTHROUGHYOURHEAD!

- Dutch: I have a plan. Hosea: You haven’t planned shit. Dutch: I’ve planned it.

- Hosea: Arthur! What on earth are you doing?! Young!Arthur: Getting rid of this demon. Young!John: *screeching and trying to get out of Arthur’s grip* Hosea: And why do you plan to get rid of him? Arthur: Because, Hosea! He woke me up by leaning over me and whispering, “I know what death feels like, it’s cold. Have you felt death?” Arthur: HE’S CLEARLY EVIL, HOSEA Hosea: That’s just how children are, Arthur. Dutch: He’s right son, put the boy down. Dutch, leaning and whispering to Hosea: But maybe we should buy a Bible just in case. Hosea: And a cross.

- (Modern au and suicide joke)

John: It’s not a phase! It’s a lifestyle, you just wouldn’t get it! Arthur: You think I didn’t go through the “I can’t tell if I want to kill myself or everyone around me” phase? Come on. John: What? I don’t wanna kill myself at all. Arthur: … John: … John: Should I- should we go talk to Hose- Arthur: We should forget this conversation happened. Take this Nirvana CD and keep your mouth shut.

- Abigail: …John. John: Yes, my angel? Abigail: You forgot something. John: No I didn’t! I took the list with me, checked it three times, even crossed things off when I put it in the cart! See, look. Apples, frozen hamhocks, cranberry juice- Abigail: John. You took Jack with you. John: Abigail: John: Abigail: John: SHIT I LEFT HIM BY THE PASTA SECTION Abigail: STOP STANDING THERE AND GO GET HIM!

- Jack: Pa, how did you get mom to marry you? John: Well son, I- John: John: I have no idea. Jack: Should I ask mom? John: I’ll be honest, I don’t think she knows the answer either.

- Charles: You did good back there. Arthur: Oh? Heh, nah, you did all the fancy stuff. I just helped. Charles: Don’t undersell yourself, Arthur. I wouldn’t be complimenting you for no reason. Arthur: Oh yeah? And here I thought you were just trying to fluff up my ego. Charles: Wouldn’t hurt to do when you work so hard, no? Arthur: Now you’re just being’ sweet- John: Can y’all wait til we’re done before you start your spiritual dick sucking? Arthur: Can you repent to the lord fast enough to save your soul in the time it’ll take me to throw you into the damn ocean, Marston?!

- Arthur: Do you even have a brain? John: Do you even have someone that loves you? Arthur: John: John: I heard it that time, I’m sorry. Arthur: This is what Abigail hears sometimes, just so you know. John: I heard it that time, I got it. I- I’ll just- Arthur: Whiskey, full bottle. The nice kind. John: Apology alcohol, got it.

-

NPC: My husband’s parents are so crazy. In-laws always are, huh? Abigail: Well, uh-

*John being an orphan* *John’s adoptive dads being criminals, one particularly off his rocker*

Abigail: ….aha, yeah;;

- Abigail: John Marston, you useless, foolish, stupid man! Bill: To hell with John! Abigail, suddenly with a very large gun: NO ONE INSULTS MY HUSBAND.

- Arthur, holding up a proper painting he actually put time and effort into: Could a depressed person make this? Charles: The painting: *a wolf in the rain laying it’s head over the body of a deer shot with an arrow* Charles: I’m, in fact, more convinced you have depression now. Arthur: …yeah this wasn’t the best evidence for my argument, huh? Charles: No. Not at all.

- John: What are you talking about? That’s completely normal, it’s like having opinions. just cause it doesn’t happen to you doesn’t mean- Tilly: No, John! No. It’s not normal to have that reaction to the sound of hearing metal on metal. John: No look, uh- Arthur! Arthur come here! Arthur: What now? John: What happens when you hear metal on metal? Like, a can bein’ rubbed with a knife. Arthur: Ugh, I hate that sound. It makes my damn skin crawl, like I got beetles underneath. Makes me wanna skin myself to get’em out. John: Right! See, Tilly? It’s not just me! Tilly: ????

Charles: …and you never got them evaluated? Hosea: In hindsight, an autistic diagnosis probably would’ve made more things make sense. But, what can ya do.

- Arthur after a dog didn’t positively react to him: Maybe this is my final straw. Charles: No. Arthur: It might be. Charles: It’s one dog. There are twenty that you stopped to pet along the way here, plenty more for you to pet after this. Arthur: You don’t understand, this is devastatin’. Charles: Arthur, please- Arthur: Utterly devastatin’, Charles.

- Arthur, tipsy: Just cause you’re gorgeous don’t mean I’ma do whatever you say. Charles: Drink the water, Arthur. Arthur: *grabs the glass* Yes, sir.

- (Got a Y/N one, also, modern Au)

Arthur: That’s the Aberdeen farm. Y/N: …what’s wrong with it? Arthur: What’cha mean? Y/N: The vibes, they’re off. Arthur: …the…vibes? Y/N: The energy, Mister Morgan. The vibe of the place. They’re off, they’re weird, wack even. I sense insidious and wretched wavelengths wafting from the aura of that property. Arthur: I see…well, to answer your question, it’s cause they are weird. And I ain’t even confirmed why cause I don’t really wanna know. Y/N: I see you can also sense the vibes are rank. Arthur: …sure, whatever that means.

- Micha: Well I think- Y/N: Well I’m certain no one fucking asked, Micha! Not a single damn person asked what the hell you thought, ever! In fact, I’m pretty sure you don’t think. I’m pretty sure your skull fills with all the bullshit in your organs, and it just spills out your mouth! Micha: Micha: I- Y/N: Shut up, Micha!

- Arthur, after Albert explains some super dangerous plan in order to get wild animals near him to photograph: You’re stupid, I like that in a man.

- Y/N: Bye Arthur, bye Karen, bye Hosea, bye Arthur. Sadie: You said ‘bye Arthur’ twice. Y/N: I like Arthur.

- NPC: Lovebirds, eh? Sadie: Arthur: Sadie: I’d rather eat a poison ivy plant with Holly Berries for dressing. *looks at Arthur* No offense. Arthur: No no, none taken. All things considered, I’d rather dive into a pit of tar and then drag myself face first through a plain of rotten chitlins. Sadie: Completely fair!

- Bill: I need you to realize you ain’t in charge here. Y/N: I need you to realize I don’t give a shit.

- Arthur: Hey Charles, uh, I got an Uhm…a spiritual question. Charles: Any particular reason you chose to ask me? Arthur: Uh well- I didn’t mean for it to be like that- I just- Charles: *sigh* What is it? Arthur: Do you know what it means when an elk stands up on its back legs? Charles: That means- Charles: WE SHOULD LEAVE, we need to leave, that’s what that means!

- Jack: …why are your boobs so big? Charles: They’re not boobs. Jack: Do you have to wear a brasier? Charles: *sigh* Arthur: He asked me the same thing a couple weeks ago, don’t think to hard bout it.

-

(Story spoilers!!) Y/N: I'm sorry, let me get this straight. Y/N: You picked up that man when he was a destitute child, grieving and starving. Taught him almost everything he knows. Y/N: Then, you did that with, what? Three others? In similar circumstances? Y/N: Created a sense of family and community, a strong bond between so many misfortuned people. With your trustworthy long term friend by your side. Y/N: And then. Y/N: One RAT. WHO IS OPENLY ANTAGONISTIC AND REEKS OF SUSPICION AS MUCH AS HE DOES HORSE SHIT, SOMEHOW CONVINCES YOU TO GO OFF YOUR ROCKER AND HARM YOUR GANG?! Y/N: Explain! Dutch: Dutch: Dutch: He praised me- Y/N: YOUR PRAISE KINK GOT YOU TO AIM A GUN AT YOUR SONS????

- Arthur: Naaah they’re an angel. Lenny: They punched Bill in the face. Seán: They told Strauss he was a waste of human material, in his own language, which they’re not fluent in. Mary-Beth: They framed Micha for a crime and got him put in prison again. Arthur: Like I said, an angel!

- John: Woman. (Translation: Darling.) Abigail: Moron. (Translation: Lovebug.)

Arthur: You tellin’ me they’re being affectionate right now? Jack: Can’t’cha read subtext, Uncle Arthur? Arthur: ???

-

(Insert Alcohol is truth serum reference)

Drunk Bill: Not to be gay, but you’re gorgeous bro. Kieran, afraid: You don’t have to be gay to appreciate a man’s beauty. Absolutely shit-faced Bill: Nah, like I’d fuck you, bro. Kieran, terrified: Okay, never mind!

- (How I imagine their first couple years together went)

Dutch: Dutch: Dutch: Dutch: How do you feel about me? Hosea, naked & beside him: ….we’re sharin’ a bedroll, Dutch. Dutch: Yes, but what are we, Hosea? Hosea: ….we’re both naked, alone, in a tent, Dutch. Dutch: That doesn’t answer my question. Hosea:

- (This one's sad, not funny, sorry-) John: You’re such a hypocrite, why is it that anything I do that you’ve done before that you get so bent outta shape?! Arthur: Because I’ve done it before you, John. John: So why do you think it’s fair to tell me not to?! Most people are proud when their younger brother ends up like’em. You don’t want anyone like you, is that it? Arthur: John: John: …oh. Arthur: Now that you got my point, will you take my god damn advice without a big fuss…please.

- John: She drives me insane! She somehow managed to make me the angriest I’ve ever been almost daily. NPC: Then leave her. John: The fu- no. What? She’s the wind beneath my wings, my darling wife, my beautiful angel. How the hell could you even think to suggest such a thing? NPC: But- John: Get outta my sight, you fuckin’ disgrace.

[zweetpea]

Happy Birthday My Love

Happy birthday L

ao3 version: here

It was the best day of the year. That is to say it was Halloween, and more importantly your husband L’s birthday.

I know right? You snatched the greatest detective in the world? Obviously, you’re beautiful. Anyway enough about you!

————

You met him in a cafe in NYC when he was 23 and you were 21. You were reading a Sherlock novel, he ordered 14 big cookies, 2 strawberry slices shortcakes, Jasmine tea with a bowl of sugar cubes, and a banana split. He sat right by your table and you looked over with concern. 

“…are you okay?”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m concerned for your health. You can’t seriously eat all of that in one sitting.”

“Why can’t I?”

“Because that’s not a proper lunch.” You say as you lift up your drink.

“Of course not. This is my pre lunch snack to get my brain stimulated.” At his statement you spit out your drink in surprising.

“What are you, diabetic? How can someone eat so much and yet be so skinny.”

“I find that you can burn calories by using your brain.”

“Okay Einstein. Just don’t drop dead anytime soon. I’m just here on vacation, I don’t need the police suspecting me to be the serial killer going around.”

“Why would they think that? You’re just a tourist.”

“I don’t find most police to be very bright or effective. Private Investigators do more work in a week than any beat cop could do in their entire life.”

The strange man was silent for a second, so you assumed that the conversation was over. However you weren’t expecting him to hold out a cookie for you. “Take it. Movie theater popcorn isn’t that good.”

“The hell?”

“Your tickets. Jaws, 1:15. I assume that your waiting for someone. You only got a drink and during lunch hour most people buy food.”

“Oh really? When do you have lunch, if this is your snack?” 

“Same time as your movie. The only difference between then will be I’ll be dinning on fine quality food and you’ll be having stale popcorn and processed butter.” You look away. “Did I strike a nerve.”

“No offense but you’re a stranger. I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to spill my guts and whole life story to you.”

“Yet you asked me if I was okay.”

“Yeah, I’ve never seen anyone eat so many sweets. Is it a crime to be concerned?”

“No. Just think of this as me repaying the generosity.”

“My Fiancé and I came out here to meet his parents.”

“You’re a little young to be getting married.”

“Uh, thanks? I don’t think it’s that weird, I’m 21. It’s not like I’m 12 being married off to some foreign diplomat.”

“Let me give you some advice. He either gave you the ring to get you to shit up or because he wants an unpaid maid.”

“Excuse me?”

“21 men don’t typically give up on hooking up with bimbo’s in short leather skirts. I’m 76%- no, 78% certain that he’s going to cheat on you by years end if he’s not already cheating. And judging by the way you smile sadly at your ring and scrunch your hands around your tickets I think you know that too.” 

“What would you do if you were me?”

“Dump him and go out with the skinny diabetic across from you, clearly.” He responded sarcastically.

“Ha, you’re so funny.” You replied back with the same tone, rolling your eyes.

“You should at least tell him what you want. If he’s not willing to negotiate, leave him.”

“What I want, huh? I want to go see Jaws, would any diabetic Einsteins be interested in movie theater candy?”

“Okay that jokes run its course. No I’m not interested in that chewy soulless garbage.”

“Could I bribe you with another slice of cake?”

“I thought that you were worried about my health? Also this is highly improper.”

“Making a new friend?”

“Chatting up a man when you’re engaged.”

“It’s not like I’m asking you out, I just don’t want to go to my movie alone. When life gives you lemons, ya know?”

“Cake and cookies. You eat some too okay. I’m Yuuji.” You shook him hand and replied back with your own name.

——

“Okay, why do you like this movie?”

“It’s a classic! Sure they probably should’ve just poisoned the stupid thing. Sometimes the right answer is the most obvious one.” You two smiled as you walked out of the theater.

He stopped dead in his tracks. “Sometimes the answer is the most obvious one. I gotta go, here…” he scribbled down something on his ticket and handed it to you. “Nice to meet you, friend.” He trotted off down the street. You looked down at his ticket and saw he gave you his number.

“Huh, not bad Emo boy.”

————

“My love, wake up. I made you breakfast.” You say as you kiss his neck.

“Let me sleep in on my birthday.” He groaned. “Don’t temp me to give in with that sultry voice. You know I can’t say no to you when you do that.”

“Not true. It’s only 82.79% affective. As evident of now.”

 “I stayed up late for weeks to perfect your favorite pancakes for you.”

“How’d I get so lucky to have a wife like you?”

“Good question, better question though is how did I manage to impress the world’s 3 greatest detectives?”

“By being intoxicating.” He replied smoothly.

“Okay Casanova, eat up before you food gets cold.” He smirked, grabbed you by your waist and pulled you into bed with him. Then he trailed kisses from your collar bone up to your jaw and finally planted a long deep loving kiss on your lips. “L!”

“How can you be mad at me when I have the sweetest treat right here in my arms?”

“I love you, L.”

“I love you too.”

BONUS: 

L: Mmh, these buttercream cheese and strawberry pancakes are delicious. Thank you my wife.

You: A perfect meal for my perfect husband. Mwah! 

You Two kiss!

[mayflora-18]

Incorrect CoD Quotes #7

Sherlock, in response to being asked to sneak into Valeria’s house: Okay. Don’t worry, guys. I got your back!

*She steps behind Ghost*

Sherlock: From right here.

———

Laswell: Hey did you call General Shepherd a bitch?

Price: Yeaaahh! He changed the Wi-Fi password!

Laswell: You can’t be-

Nikolai: THAT BITCH CHANGED THE WI-FI PASSWORD!!!!

———

*Something bad and unexpected happens on a mission*

Nikolai: Why didn’t you tell me?!

Sherlock: Well, because I wanted us to fail.

Nikolai: 😑

Sherlock: OBVIOUSLY I DIDN’T KNOW!!!!

———

Graves: Hey, I always get the vibe that you, like, hate me or something.

Ghost: What?! Me, hate you?!

Ghost: …You’re right.

———

Soap: If I punch myself in the face and it hurts, am I strong or weak?

Ghost: Strong.

Gaz: Weak.

Price: A dumbass is what you are.

———

Alejandro: When I first met you, I thought you were weird and annoying.

Graves: …

Graves: And?

Alejandro: And you are.

———

Hadir: Sorry I’m late, I was… doing things.

*pounding footsteps can be heard from behind the door*

Alex, bursting through the door: HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!

Hadir: Push is such a strong word. I prefer calling it … giving you a little nudge.

Alex: Oh I’ll give you a nudge when I shove mY FOOT UP YOUR ASS!

Price, covering Farah’s ears: Hey! Watch your fucking language in front of the president!

———

Graves: Yo, what’s that song that goes like, “Despacito”?

Alejandro: Despacito?

Graves: Yeah. What’s the name?

Alejandro: DESPACITO

Graves: …Yeah. What’s the name?

Alejandro, pissed: Dios mío, you’re an idiot!

Graves: Thank you! Alexa, play “Dios mío, you’re an idiot!”

Echo Dot Alexa: Ok *starts playing Despacito*

Alejandro: 😦

Graves 😎

———

Ghost: What happens to the car if you press the break and the accelerator at the same time? Does it take a screenshot?

Price:

Soap:

Gaz:

Roach, wanting to be a little shit: Ye-

Sherlock being done with life: No. That’s it, I’m driving.

———

Soap: Go to bed! It’s 3am. If you don’t you’re going to hate yourself in the morning!

Roach: Jokes on you, I’m gonna hate myself in the morning ✨REGARDLESS✨

———

Sherlock: I don’t want to be a person anymore.

Ghost: … What?

Sherlock: I’m tired of it.

Soap: 😥 Maybe we should talk about this-

Sherlock: I just wanna be a dinosaur.

Ghost:

Soap:

Roach: Me too!

———

*Sherlock walks into the rec room and drops her bag on the floor*

Sherlock: tEll mE wHy tHerE arE 7 BiLlioN peOplE On tHiS DAmN PlaNEt ANd NoT 1 pErsOn hAs A CrUsH On mE!? WhAt ThE HelL UNiveRsE?!!

Gaz, whose been pining for her since the day he met her: what about me 🥺

———

Roach, sleep deprived: All I want-

Soap: Oh no

Roach: -is for for someone to walk up to me-

Ghost: What’s going on now?

Roach: -look me in the eyes, put their hands on my face, and very passionately-

Gaz: Kiss you?

Roach: -twist as hard as they can and put me out of my fucking misery!

Price: Roach no

Roach: Roach yes

———

Laswell: John, aren’t you supposed to be on a Zoom call right now?

Price: I got kicked off already.

Laswell: Why! What did you do?!

Price: Well she said, “DoN’t GeT sMaRt WiTh Me!” and I said, “Then what are we paying you for?” and she did not like that!

Laswell: John that’s rude.

Price: …But I’m right on this.

———

Roach: Remember when you guys told me to go to the pharmacy?

Sherlock: *looks at Gaz before looking at Roach* Yess

Roach: Mmm they’re out of my ADHD medication for five days.

Sherlock: Oh my god-

Roach: It’s gonna be a fun week!

Gaz, already leaving the room: I’m going to my mother’s-

Sherlock, pissed that she would have to watch Roach by herself: What happened to “in sickness and in health”, motherfucker!?

———

Sherlock: I’m sorry guys… there’s nothing else we can do. Graves is dying, we’re gonna have to pull the plug.

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: Oh my god… Oh my god…

Soap: Can I do it?

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: What?

Soap: Can I pull the plug?

Gaz: Hey no! I wanna pull the plug!

Ghost: No fuck you! I get to do it!

Soap: This is bullshit! I wanna do it!

Price: NO! I-I’m the oldest, I should be the one to do it!

Ghost: I’ll thumb wrestle you for it.

Price: Fine, let’s go BITCHHH

Price & Ghost, hands together for thumb wrestling: 1, 2, 3, 4, I declare a thumb war!

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: Are you two serious?!

Price: YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE A CHANCE

Ghost: OH, YOU’RE GOING DOWN

Price: NOOO, NO, NO, NOO

Ghost: OHHHHHHHHHH

*Ghost wins*

Ghost: Yess

Price: NO

Ghost: yEsSSSSS

Price: DAMN IT

Ghost: Alright, where’s that plug?!

Soap: Where’s that plug?

Ghost: Where’s that mother fucking plug?!

Sherlock: Do you have ANY respecT?!

Ghost: No, I have 0 respect!

Soap: We have 0.

Price: We have 0 respect.

Gaz: I have nothing!

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: I can’t even believe this!

Sherlock: Yeah, me too. Alright let’s get this show on the road! I got some leftover lasagna at home, and it’s got my name on it!

———

Ghost: Good morning, everyone. God has let me live another day. And I’m about to make it EVERYONE’S problem.

Soap: Good morning to you too.

Price: 🤦‍♂️ I give up.

———

Alex: What do we do when we’re feeling sad?

Farah: Watch a murder documentary and plan out how to do it without getting caught?

Hadir’s soul in Hell: *scared shitless despite already being dead*

Alex: Jesus fuck, NO!

———

Soap: You guys won’t believe what just happened!

Ghost: What happened?

Soap: Some guy from Shadow Company wouldn’t leave Sherlock alone-

Nikolai, maternal uncle instincts kicking in: Excuse me!

Soap: -but she took care of it!

Price, to Sherlock: How’d you take care of it?

Sherlock: Simple. *clears throat* 🎶Row row row your boat, The fuck away from me, Felony felony just tried to test me, And I’m a cause a scene🎶

Nikolai, laughing: That’s my girl!

[verfound]

FIC: "Luka's Secret" (MLB; Lukanette; LBSC Lukanette Month 2024)

@lovebugs-and-snakecharmers is doing a Lukanette Month for September 2024, and we all just kinda tossed some prompts in the disco to compile a list?  We ended up with 71 prompts, so I decided I’d roll some dice to pick a prompt, do a twenty minute (ish, bc we all know sometimes they run away from me) sprint, and try to get some short fics out this month?

(Rated M for half-dressed smoochies)

Read on Ao3

05 September 2024

Prompt 66: Secrets

Luka had a secret.

Juleka was fairly sure of that.

It was pretty obvious – about as obvious as that time Marinette had been keeping a secret and their squad had gotten themselves akumatized trying to get her to come clean.  Luka and Marinette had that in common: they were both terrible at keeping secrets.  They had multiple tells, some pretty obvious and some less so, but what that meant was when Luka started jumping at the sight of her own shadow she was pretty sure she knew what was up.

…well.  She didn’t actually know what was up.  She just knew he was keeping something from her.  And while she respected that – they were both keenly aware of how important privacy could be, growing up in such close quarters as they had – it was still driving her a bit nutty.

Because Luka had always been big on truth and honesty.  Being open with people was very important to him.  So she knew, when he got squirrely like this, that he had a secret, and keeping secrets was bad for him.

She was pretty sure secrets were what had gotten him akumatized, the last time around.

She was just trying to be a good little sister.  Help him out.  She didn’t actually care what the secret was – that was his own business – just that he was being weird about it and she needed him to stop.  The weirdo.

She had been planning on confronting him when he got home, but as she walked towards their cracked door and heard his low voice on the other side she realized she had lost her element of surprise.

“I think she knows,” she heard him sigh.  “Or suspects.  I told you I was bad at this.”

…no shit, Sherlock.  At least he was aware of it.  It’d probably be worse if he tried to play it off like everything was fine when, clearly, it was not.

When no voice answered him, she assumed he was on the phone.  He chuckled, and then she heard a thump.

“Shut up,” he said.  “It’s easier for you.  You don’t share a room with her.”  There was another beat, followed by: “…she will not.  I promise you…she won…but…”  Another heavy sigh.  Another thump – the sound of his head hitting the wall, she was sure.  “Fine.  We’ll do this your way.  But…it’s not a bad thing, you know.  I think she might even be happy about it.”

Her brow furrowed.  It was obvious they were talking about her, but what exactly was she supposed to be happy about?

“I know,” he said.  “Ok.  Ok.  I’ll be there.  I love you.”

There was a harder clattering, like he had just dropped his phone on the amp he used as a nightstand, and another sigh.  She blinked as she stared at their door, fairly certain her heart had just stopped.

Luka…loved someone?

Well…shit.

Who the hell was going to tell Marinette?

. : .

“I think we have a problem,” she said the next day from her place on Rose’s bed.  Rose was busy changing – she had just returned from visiting her brothers, and Frankie’s husband had taken her shopping.  She had called her over for…well.  Juleka was pretty sure for make up makeouts, since she’d been gone a week, but she’d also wanted to show off her haul.  She tipped her head back, looking at the closet door that blocked her girlfriend from view.  “Rose.  Did you hear me?”

“I did,” she called, tossing the lilac dress she’d just shown her over the top of the door.  Juleka had liked that one.  The hornier part of her couldn’t wait to peel it off her.  “I’m waiting for you to tell me what the problem is.  I need to assess for optimal reaction.”  She poked her head out, and the bra strap sliding off her otherwise bare shoulder was very distracting.  “I’m trying to not be so extra, remember?”

“I think Luka’s seeing someone,” Juleka said.  She dropped her head back on the bed and stared at the ceiling.  “He’s…been avoiding me.  And acting weird.  Like he’s keeping something from me.”

“That doesn’t necessarily mean he’s seeing anyone,” Rose said, stepping out from behind the door with her arms folded across her chest.  Juleka glanced at her before forcing her eyes back up, because if her shoulder had been distracting…  “He could just be busy, Jules.  You know he’s taken on a bunch of students over the summer.”

“I heard him on the phone,” she insisted.  “Didn’t sound like a student he was talking to.  He…said he loved them.”

Rose’s brow furrowed.

“…did he have the call on speaker?” she asked.  Juleka shook her head.  Rose sighed and looked down at her feet.  “Well.  Shoot.  Have you asked him about it yet?”

“Didn’t really know how,” she sighed.  Her eyes closed as she settled back onto the bed.  “I just…I guess I always thought he’d work things out with Marinette?  I like Marinette.  I don’t want to have to get used to someone else.  She was going to be a great sister-in-law.”

“…it’s been a long time since they tried to make it work, Jules,” Rose said, her voice sympathetic.  Juleka sighed and rolled onto her side, reaching out a hand for her.  Rose smiled as she walked over, climbing onto the bed beside her and cuddling up against her side.  Juleka smiled as she wrapped an arm around her, the skin of Rose’s back hot against her own.  “Maybe it’s for the best.  Maybe it’s time they both moved on.”

“…who are you and what have you done with my hopeless romantic girlfriend?” Juleka grumped, smiling at her.  Rose giggled and leaned up, kissing her slowly.

“It’s called growing up,” she said.  “It’s supposed to be good for you.”

Juleka hummed and leaned in for another kiss.  She’d worry about Luka’s secrets later.  There was entirely too much half-dressed Rose to occupy her attention to worry too much about stupid brothers just then.

. : .

A few blocks away, hidden in the depths of the Liberty (or: hiding out in the laundry room, where suspicions Captains and sisters couldn’t catch them), Luka was busy with his own…distractions.

Specifically the lapful of half-dressed Marinette, who had pushed him back onto the dryer and climbed on top of him the second he’d set the timer.  And while he had been the sole focus of his sister’s attention lately, he could safely say she was the absolute last thing on his mind.

It was a little hard to be concerned with worrying about her, when Marinette’s hands were in his hair and her tongue was in his mouth.  Or when she tipped her head back like that and made such delicious little sounds when his lips moved along her neck, lower and lower to…

“N-no one’s home, right?” she asked, breathless, and he hummed as his lips found her chest.  His hands slid up her back, toying with the band of her bra.  “Luka.”

“Jules is at Rose’s,” he said, nipping along the lacy edge of the cup covering her breast.  He was starting to think she had fallen into the river on purpose, though she should have known by now there were easier ways to get her shirt off…  “Ma’s…not home.  We’re safe.”

“I’d hope so,” she giggled.  “I mean…it’s bad enough if they catch us together, but if they catch us like this?”

She pushed her chest a little closer to him, wiggling as if to emphasize her point, but all that made him want to do was kiss her more.

“Don’t fall into the river, then,” he teased.  He glanced up at her, his eyes darker than they had any right to be.  “If you weren’t still such a klutz, we wouldn’t have needed to toss your clothes in the wash.”

“And wouldn’t a gentleman offer me a shirt, too, instead of making me walk around practically naked like this?” she quipped.  He hummed, dropping another kiss to her chest.

“I’m a boat kid, not a gentleman,” he reminded her, “and I happen to love you like this.”

“You love me anyway,” she laughed.  He chuckled, picking at the hooks of her bra again, and nodded.

“I really do,” he said.  He glanced up at her with a wicked little grin.  “…klutz and all.”

“…why you…” she huffed, and then he wasn’t sure what happened.

There was a brief moment where the world seemed to spin and flip, and then he was lying on his back across the washer and dryer with Marinette hovering over him, his shirt pushed up around his neck and her lips closing around a nipple.  Her teeth scraped the sensitive skin before she sucked, and he gasped as his entire body twitched beneath her.

“Who’s the klutz now?” she hummed, and his laugh turned into a strangled little sound he couldn’t bother being embarrassed about.

“M-my point,” he huffed, his hands sliding up her thighs and around to cup her ass, “is that your secret – our secret – is safe.  For now.  They don’t suspect a thing, and no one’s here to find out.”

It was just them for the foreseeable future, and he had every intention to take full advantage of that.

“…don’t say it like that,” she sighed, her teeth grazing his nipple again.  “We will tell them, Luka.  Just…not yet.”

“I know,” he said, squeezing her ass and encouraging her to look up at him.  He pushed her up, lifting his head to catch her lips in a slow kiss.  “I just…don’t you think it’ll be worse?  The longer we keep this from everyone?”

“We could always elope first,” she said.  “Then no one will be able to complain.  It’ll be too late to, by the time they find out.”

“Bullshit,” he laughed, pecking a kiss against her lips.  “Your dad will flip.  He’s probably been planning our wedding since you were in collège.  He’ll kill me if I marry you and he’s not there to see it.”

“And the Captain won’t kill me?” she teased.  He chuckled and shrugged.

“She’s more lenient,” he said.  “Eloping has just enough chaotic flair to make her proud.  Plus, she already likes you.  It’ll just cement you as a keeper in her books.”

“Papa loves you,” she reminded him.  She sighed as she settled against his chest, her ear resting above his heart.  “We’ll tell them.  Tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow,” he agreed, the word sounding more relieved than he’d probably meant it to.  “Until then…”

He rolled her towards the wall, and she squealed out a laugh as he was suddenly on top of her.  They’d tell everyone tomorrow.  Eventually.  For now, she was still his secret to keep, and he was determined to enjoy every last minute of it.

[shujohajohaminnie]

Mine

Pairing: Yang Jeongin x fem!reader

Genre: Smut

Word Count:2771

Summary: What happens when there's a serial killer in love with you who will kill anyone who’s near you. 

Afab!reader, Profanity, Dark Concepts, Talks of murder, Blood, Possessive behavior, Obsessive behavior, pet names, Raw Sex. Let me know if I miss anything. 

“Okay, so what do we know so far” “Whoever the killer is, is in love with y/n” “Oh my god, not this again” “WHAT IT’S TRUE” “Ji do you have any proof” “Well everyone who either slept with y/n, tired to get with y/n or has a thing-” “Had” “As I was saying… had a thing for y/n is now… dead” “That’s purely coincidental” “Is it?” “Yes, it is… and if that was the case why the hell is Chan in the hospital right now” “I mean, even I thought Chris was into you” “Well he isn’t” You rolled your eyes laying back down on the couch your phone in hand. “Okay so let's make a list of people in love with y/n” “Okay first one… that weird kid from her English class, that’s always following her around… what's his name” “Dae” Jisung sapped his fingers writing the name on the board in big bold font. “Who’s next” “ Add Johnny” “Sorry to break it hon… but that piece of shit you call a boyfriend does not love you” “Yes he does” “No… he doesn’t” “Hiah” Hyunjin yelled jumping in his seat from excitement, he loved to play detective. “Think you missed a chapter Jinnie… he’s already dead” “Really” “Mhmm knife to the face” “Gross”. “Can we stop” “What” “Doing this… we’re not the cops, Plus it’s just weirding me out” “She’s right we should drop it” “Jeongin” “Hmmm?” “Add Jeongin to the list” “Come on you can’t be serious” “Of course we’re not being serious, it’s Jeongin were talking about. He could barely kill a spider, but it’s just because he’s madly in love with you…so if I were you innie, I’d be careful” “Is that a threat, are you the killer Hannie” “Puh-lease… you wish I was obsessed with you” “Whatever, I’m gonna go” “What where” “To my room calm down mom. I have to start getting ready for the party”. “You aren’t serious right” “Yeah… why” “Maybe because there's a killer out there taregting us” “Well Ji… if we're going based on your theory, the killer is only going for people in love with me. So you guys are safe” You laughed before closing your bedroom door excited to attend the hottest party of the year. Was it the smartest idea? No, but you were dumb college kids, not every idea that you and your group of friends came up with was the brightest.

“I don’t think this is a good idea” Jisung looked down at the ground nervously  “Han everything will be fine, we’ve got a black belt with us and buff daddy Changbin for security” “We said the killer is in love with y/n right” “Yes” “No” “Well he, or she might be in the room with us right now” “Thank you Hyunjin for that inclusivity” Your newest friend rolled her eyes at Hyunjins subtle, not so subtle ‘look’ shot directly at her. “But I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’m not the killer” “Mhmm… I’m not buying it” “If you’re so sure it’s me why don’t you tell the police so they can arrest me” “I’ve tried that, they said there's no evidence” “BECAUSE IT’S NOT ME” “Guys guys stop… Jinnie, I love you but it’s not Joon, don’t you remember she was attacked too” “It just seems perfectly planned that she was there when Chan almost got killed and she ended up with only a paper cut on her arm” “IT WASN’T A PAPER CUT, I ALMOST LOST MY ARM” “Yeah right. I’ve got my eyes on you new girl” “Jinnie just cause you're dressed up like Sherlock Holmes doesn’t mean you have the detective skills” “Pfttt speak for yourself” “Didn’t you guess the killer was someone who died three weeks ago” “Way to go detective” Joon laughed interlocking your hands and walking you out the door. You pulled down your ghost face mask and walked out of the building towards the blasting music coming from the on-campus frat house. 

The night was only getting more interesting as the students continued to drink. “Hey where's your little boyfriend” “With his friends” You nodded in the direction of your boyfriend with his two closest friends. “Doesn’t it bother you that he only hangs out with them two, I mean they’re kinda known for sleeping around” “No” Of course it bothered you that your boyfriend only hung out with the two prettiest sluttiest girls on campus. “Come on don’t lie to me” “Fine Lee it does bug me, but what am I supposed to do just tell them to back off” “Yes, that's exactly what you need to do” Felix interrupted Lee Know handing you and Han a cup. “What the hell is this” Han recoiled after smelling the mystery beverage. “Jungle Juice… it’s so good” “Absolutely not” he shook his head taking your cup and placing it down on the table along with his and Minho’s. “How many have you had” “Two” “Oh that's not bad” “Two red cups and two blue cups” “Well there goes our black belt” “Hey I have a reason” “And what’s that Yongbook” “Shit he’s mad mad” “The red cups are if you think we're going to win the game on Friday, the blue is if we're going to lose… so I’m staying neutral” “And you couldn’t just drink two” “Well I could’ve but then I wanted a third and I needed to balance it out… but I’m not the worst one guess how much Binnie’s had” “Five?” “Eight… he’s also staying neutral” He motioned over to Chagbin who was passed out on the couch. “Great not only have we lost our black belt but he lost our big boy Binnie” “Han it’s going to be fine, just chill out” “Chill out…. CHILL OUT, I CAN’T CHILL OUT WHEN I COULD DIE” “Then die knowing you had a good time instead of worrying. You wanna hit of this to calm down” “NO” He yelled snatching the blunt out of Lee Know’s hand, and tossing it who knows where. “That’s a hazard” “Guys… we need to be on high alert” You groaned resting your head on Lee Know’s shoulder while Jisung proceeded to lecture the three of you on your carelessness in the current situation.  “Ji Ji calm down we’ll be fine there are so many people around us I seriously doubt the killer whoever she is-” “IT’S NOT ME” “Is going to strike right now” Hyunjin smiled wrapping his arm around Jisung’s shoulder trying to calm down your anxious friend. “And how many did you have” “This is my first one” “Jin” “Fine it’s my sixth one… but it doesn’t hit til your 5th one I swear” “Well like I was saying we shouldn’t be drinking because we need to be paying attention just in case who ever it is, is here” “Who’s here” Jeongin joined the group with a water bottle in hand. “Good job I.N staying sober I like it” “Who’s here” Seungmin asked joining the group discussion in the kitchen. “The masked crusader” Lee Know laughed wiggling his fingers towards Jisung. “Isn’t that Batman?” “Well if Batman’s here there's nothing to worry about” “Guysssss” Han whined 

“Okay never have I ever tried to seduce a teacher for a higher grade” You clinked cups with Hyunjin while you took a sip of your drink with a smile. “Who?” “Professor Choi” “Is that why he’s dead” “Mhmm… you know what guys I have just come to realize that I’m going to end up single for life if there's a killer going after anyone and everyone that wants me” “Well that got depressing” “Shut up bitch” “GUYS GUYS” Han ran towards the couch where you all were sitting down. “I saw someone else here with a ghost face costume that could be the killer” “Ji calm down hon… that’s just Johnny we did couple costumes this year” “Yeah along with half of the other students here” “I have an idea” “WE SHOULD STICK TOGETHER” Changbin laughed in your lap nuzzling closer and closer to you while he drifted off to sleep yet again. “He’s gonna end up dead” Lee Know laughed looking at the subtle affection you were giving your best friend. I mean after all, all Chan had to do to end up on the killer's hit list was give you a ride home from a party, now here Binnie was cuddling you. “No, I was going to say we should split up-” “and look for clues.” “Yeah okay, shaggy” “Han you do know that's how people end up dead right” “Yeah man splitting up is a no for me” “You can count me out, I’m going to stay right here where I’m safe” “Don’t worry y/n I’ll stay here with you” “Aww true love… y/n when are you going to leave Johnny and date our little Innie” “In-ah being with me is going to get you killed” “No it won’t that’s a stupid theory” “It’s not stupid it’s real” “I still think we should look for clues” “I think we should let the cops handle it and live our fucking lives… it’s Halloween we should be having fun” “Having fun?” “Yes drinking, dancing, smoking, and having meaningless sex” “I don’t think you could have meaningless sex even if you wanted to Jinnie” “Yeah didn't you fall in love with your last sneaky link and were forced to end it” “Okay fuck you” “No fuck you what the fuck” “Guys guys should we leave early or no?” “No” “Everyone in favor of leaving early says I” Silence of course. “Don’t worry Hannie we’re here” 

And you were, you and the boys stayed on that couch stuck at each other's hip for about an hour after that conversation. That was until you saw a familiar somebody walking towards you. You checked his shoes to make sure it was really him. “Hey” You smiled looking up at him. He extended his gloved hand out for you to take not saying a word. “What?” You asked taking his hand, he pulled you up signaling you to the restroom. You smiled walking away when a hand held you back. “Do you really want to have drunk sex with your shitty boyfriend in the Kappa restroom” “Yes now shut up and stick together before Jisung loses it again” “Y/n you can’t leave what if he gets you” “You said it yourself Ji, If the killer’s in love with me, he wouldn’t hurt me” 

But of course not even Jisung was sure about that. Jimmy pushed you up against the door sliding his hand up your thigh towards your heat. You sighed throwing your head back as you felt him take off his gloves. His long fingers beginning to draw circles on your clit. Wait long fingers? “J-Johnny… take off your mask I want to see you” No answer you reached your hand up in an attempt to take off the mask yourself, but he moved his head away from you. "Come on Johnny take off the mask I'm serious" "I'm not Johnny" You looked down at his left sleeve that held your waist against the door, you noted the way the material looked darker than the rest. You looked at your hip noticing the red trail staining your skin. "What the fuck... is that blood?". He pulled off his mask to reveal Jeongin with his sly smirk. “Jeongin what the fuck wheres Johhny” “In one of the bedrooms upstairs with his throat slit” “I told you to wait for me Jeongin I wanted to see his fucking face” “Baby but-” “No honey, I was going to lead him in here, you were going to hide behind the curtain and when I shut the door I was going stab him and then you were going to finish him off that was the plan” “I know I know baby, but if it makes you feel better I passed down your message” “It does… so how was it” “Just like you thought it was going to be …he cried and begged for his life” “Good, fucking asshole” You laughed throwing your head back as he continued with his previous movements. You moved the costume gown up unbucking his pants. You couldn’t wait anymore you needed him. You needed him ever since he was in your apartment when you were getting ready, but you couldn’t not with the boys there. It would blow your cover. You had a plan and you were going to stick to it. They were going to find Johnny, you were going to mourn and in your mourning Jeongin was going to ‘comfort’ you, giving you two the perfect excuse for getting together. 

You wrapped your leg around his waist leading him into your heat. “I told you not to go for Chan” You moaned feeling the all-familiar stretch. You didn’t feel bad for sleeping with Jeongin while being Johnny. You weren’t cheating on him in your head you were over since the moment he cheated on you with his ‘friends’. You wanted to dump him, but that's when Jeongin came to you with the wonderful idea to pay him back for the pain he had caused you, caused his pretty girl. “He was all over you” Jeongin groaned beginning to slide in and out of you “Plus I wasn’t going to kill him, it was just a warning” he grunted pulling down your dress straps to release your tits for its confinement. “He was just giving me a ride Jeongin, he wouldn’t have to if you had your license”. You moaned as you felt him begin to kiss down your jaw to your chest. Taking one of your sensitive nipples into his mouth. He rolled the other in between his fingers driving you absolutely insane. “You know why I don’t have it” he whispered pulling his hand away from your breast and dragging it down to your clit drawing figure eights on it once again. “Yeah because you’re so busy slicing anyone that gets close to me” You moaned grabbing his forearm as he increased his speed. Only your two could have a full-blown argument in the middle of having sex. But you were in love, a love so toxic, that you felt like you were being suffocated when around each other. But when you two were apart it felt like you were being torn apart limb by limb. It was a love that you both couldn’t let go. You felt yourself reach closer and closer analyzing the words he was saying to you. He would do something that was so illegal, just for you. You tightened around him feeling that oh-so-familiar feeling in your lower stomach. “Jeongin I’m I’m”  “I’m protecting you” He grunted thrusting into you once more before you felt him paint your walls in white. You cummed around his cock hearing those last words. You’ve never been with someone who loved you the way that he did. He sighed pulling away from the crook of your neck to look at you. “I love you”. He whispered stroking your cheek. He didn’t stop thrusting into you, fucking you through both of your orgasms. “I love you too” You moaned kissing his lips while you wrapped your arms around him. Now that you had him you weren’t going to let go. 

You took your previous spot on the couch going on your phone. “Oh, so we're not going to talk about it” “Talk about what” “How you just had sex with your boyfriend and how you’re just sitting here like he didn’t just fill you up” “Changbin” Felix cringed hearing your friends out loud thought. “We didn’t fuck, he just wanted to talk to me” “Is everything okay” Jisung looked at you worryingly. “Yeah we’re fine… just school stuff” You smiled wrapping your arms around him comforting, he shook his head backing away from you. “Nuh-uh, I don’t wanna die” “Don’t worry Hannie you’re not gonna die… I have a feeling we're done with all of this mystery killer crap”. You laughed watching as Jeongin joined the group again with a drink in hand, wearing his previous costume. It was all going according to plan. 

[chronicsyd]

Soooooo I just watched the trailer for S2 and uhhhh-ahhh ah-ha… (lemme just... share my thoughts real quick):

Vi is outright calling Jinx, “Jinx”. She Definitely thinks Powder is beyond saving at this point (I knew it was coming, but it’s still sad to see at the same time) and she says “my sister is gone” so yea, she Fully believes this herself. And I think that’s the stick that broke the camel’s back for Vi to be sticking around topside.

I hope to God Ambessa doesn’t mean the Entire council is dead… (but with absences of Viktor and Jayce in this trailer isn’t getting my hopes up) maybe she just means that there’s So little people that there’s nothing the council can Actually do anymore, and so everything is just in chaos. (Also yea, my predictions of Cassandra being dead were spot on… so good job me)

Honestly, I was expecting Ambessa to have a more “antagonistic” (not outright Villain, but she’s certainly not making things better if that makes sense) role this season, Clearly she stuck around for a reason. I also kinda think she’s addressing either Caitlyn or Jayce (should he happen to Be alive) with the words she’s saying here. (my thoughts are leaning more towards Caitlyn because she says, “You will have Justice” and I think that’s what’s Caitlyn’s looking for. and if Mel happens to die in that council room, she also feels the loss that would bring as well as Caitlyn.)

Well… I wanted “Unhinged Caitlyn” and I CERTIANLY got it…

SO… I was Wrong about S2 being the last season, yea I’m a little upset about it. And I’m now worried about certain characters meeting their demise (oh God I hope that Vi isn’t the one that kills Jinx if it happens… I don’t think I’ll EVER be able to recover from that)  

Ekko’s still alive yay! (no shit sherlock…) (I’m honestly expecting more between him and Jinx this season) (also Heimerdinger's there... but i expected that as he is no longer a councilor)

Warick showing up, of course…

Noxus and Enforcers will be working together here… oh dear…

One of the clips Clearly show’s Caitlyn wearing the old enforcer uniform (you can tell by the color of the collar thing she’s wearing, and the sides of the collar don’t stick up around her neck in the newer uniform) so that happens early on in the season

Vi seeing the death and devastation that Jinx has caused to the council and topside is what I think shook her in that direction to believe that Jinx is beyond saving. And it Hurts for her to admit it, you can clearly hear it in her voice.

Jinx says to Vi first thing, “Finally got the name right… sister.” (she probably tries to go after Jinx in the first part of the season, still believing that Powder’s there. But has to learn that there’s only Jinx. And Jinx is the one that needs to be stopped) and there's SO much venom in her voice when she says it too, like damn...

Now I think there’s MORE to the face Vi’s pulling in that last teaser we got with her than “just being an Enforcer” “not happy being an Enforcer” all that fun jazz.

I have No idea who’s under that cloak… they’ve done a good job hiding their face

of course Sevika's still around, wasn't expecting anything less. but there's clearly no "top dog" to take Silco's place. everyone in Zaun is just fighting for their own thing and not under one specific person if that makes Any sense.

I don't recognize who Sevika sees to be fighting in that clip (does anyone know who it is? or is it just someone we haven't met yet)

Netflix is still calling this a "teaser" so i believe that we have to have at least One full trailer that's probably being given to us in a few months before S2 arrives

Vi's wearing Claggor's goggles I'm gonna CRY

(I’m most definitely probably going to add things and have “sudden realizations” so be on the lookout for that… ha-ha)

[yourlocalshrimp318]

My mom likes Good Omens and is very dissatisfied by the ending

Good day folks! I’ve got good news and I’ve got bad news. Depends on how you interpret it.

Bad news: I was too tired to write the post on season two ep1 and 2. Good news: I made notes on my mother’s reaction. Bad news: i didn’t write much to it because I was very fucking tired. Maybe good news: we watched episode 3 to 6 this evening, means I can finish this series, also means I’ve got a lot to remember and I am bad at that. Good news: you folks get a whole post on watching season 2 with my mom! A little more good news: she didn’t disown me and I was not grounded. She didn’t even cry. She just really wants a season 3. same, mom, same.

For the first two episodes: *checks phone for notes* as far as I see, she is a shipper. Very much. She is also not further concerned on the angels having typically male names and being played by woman. Which was quite surprising to me. She referred to Micheal as he.

„Has Gabriel lost his mind? And why the fuck is he naked? Didn’t need to see that.“

She complimented the music, it’s very fitting.

She was quite upset that Aziraphale and Crowley just won’t communicate. How right she was.

„Very interesting, I am really excited for the next episodes.“ these shall come now.

So uhhh. Wait, lemme check Wikipedia so I have an overview. Okay I checked Wikipedia and unlike for season one there is no overview thingy for each episode in season two. Very sad. I also got carried away. Anyway this will now come in order of what I remember, very sorry for that. It was much today.

In episode three when the boys were in Edinburgh, she paused to explain to me that it was very common for people stealing corpses. Yes mother I know. I am infected with good omens brainrot, I know a whole lot shit. But thanks.

„Damn Beelzebub looks disgusting.“ nah, when they come to earth they no longer look disgusting. She understood that, when she saw Beelzebub.

We agreed that the punishment for uhmmm German right-orientated people is very okay. Zombies are very ugly. „What is Mycroft doing there?“ (I also watched Sherlock with my mom btw. Interest on that? I’m sure I’ll remember a little bit)

Her reaction to „Jane Austen had balls.“ was amusing. She pulled a 🤨 and continued. Well okay.

(Fuck I have dementia or smth.) (fuck I am incompetent of using the internet, Wikipedia has information on each episode.)

Shax has a very bad taste in clothing. According to my mom. She is right. I think.

„Jim/James/Gabriels coat is so very stylish!“ yea. Please folks, do tell me, did it have a use or deeper meaning?

Before we watched episode 6 I organised tissues. I was surprised we didn’t need them.

„Oh man, the thing with Jim/James/Gabriel and Beelzebub is so cute!“ very much yes.

So. Final fifteen. It was very quiet in the living room. During and after the final fifteen. She didn’t cry (I was so close to cry) but she looked very dissatisfied. I mean I get it. But I was sad, she was like: „when does season three come? Do we know what happens next? That’s just so mean!“

After we turned the TV off we talked about it. She said it was just very tragic, the red-haired one loved Blondie so much and the fact that that Crowley waited at the car to see if Azi changed his mind is heartbreaking. Crowley deserves better. We hope he’s fine. Sadly we don’t know.

I am glad to say that my mom is not infected by the brainrot, which is both good I guess? Yea. I hope I captured most of it but it was a lot and I am tired.

Good day/night Folks!

(Just spend another 15 minutes on tumblr and I really hope I don’t dream of a weird mixture of Good Omens, Merlin and Lord of the Ring lmao)

[raina-at]

Family

John slowly opens his eyes. The room is quiet. The lights are dim, and the television over his bed is showing cartoons on mute. The blanket is uncomfortable and it smells of antiseptics and human misery.

He hates hospitals. Well, on this side of the bed at least. 

There’s something heavy and warm lying on one half of his body. He looks down and sees Rosie, fast asleep, her head on John’s shoulder. Apparently, she took a bit of a break from colouring on his leg cast and fell asleep.

It’s impossible to tell what time it is, but he guesses it must be rather late.

The door opens and a nurse comes in. She smiles when she sees him awake. He nods at Rosie and motions her to be quiet and she nods.

“Everything all right?” the nurse asks quietly. 

John nods. “So far so good.”

“With a bit of luck, you'll be out of here by the end of the week,” she says, adjusting his pillow. “Your husband should be back in a second, he just stepped out to take a phone call.” She smiles at Rosie’s sleeping form. “Couldn’t get either of them to leave. You have a lovely family.”

“Thank you,” John says, returning her smile, not bothering to correct her about the assumption she made about Sherlock. It’s easier this way, no arguments about visiting hours. Also, he’s used to it. So many people think they’re lovers, and he’s long since stopped even trying to explain that they’re not, because honestly, it doesn’t make any difference. 

“Looks like the little one might be out for the night. I’ll bring in a cot for her later, we can settle you both more comfortably.”

“Thank you,” John repeats.

The door opens again, and Sherlock walks in. 

“Hey,” John greets him with a weak smile. 

Sherlock looks tired, but he returns John’s smile. “Hey yourself.”

The nurse excuses herself, muttering about seeing to the cot.

Sherlock sits down next to John’s bed and scrutinises him with narrowed eyes and what John calls his ‘deduction face’. “You still feel like shit, don’t you?”

“I was hit by a car not 48 hours ago, what do you think?” John asks, but he keeps his tone gentle because Sherlock looks exhausted and worried. “It’s not that bad, though. Could have been worse.”

“Three broken ribs, a broken leg and a light concussion, that’s not trivial, John.”

John holds out his hand and Sherlock takes it, clasps John’s fingers between both of his hands, moving closer to the bed. 

“I’m sorry I scared you,” John says, gently, quietly, careful not to wake Rosie. 

“Hardly your fault,” Sherlock mutters, looking down at their joined hands with a murderous expression. “That stupid driver. He’s lucky you weren’t hurt any worse, or I would have murdered him with my bare hands. Or maybe I would have just broken all his bones but let him live a life of misery and-”

“Calm down, love, you’re going to wake the Gremlin,” John soothes, squeezing Sherlock’s hand tightly. 

Sherlock grumbles something inaudible, but he subsides with the threats. 

Silence falls, and John watches Sherlock watch him. There’s obviously something on Sherlock’s mind, but John knows from experience that it’s better to let Sherlock work things out in his own time. 

“They didn’t let me see you,” Sherlock finally says, quietly. His eyes drop to John’s hand still entwined with his. “I had to tell them we’re married, otherwise they would’ve made me leave.”

“But you’re next of kin on all of my records,” John answers, frowning in confusion.

“There was a problem with the Internet, they couldn’t access your records.”

“I’m sorry, that must have been stressful,” John says, squeezing Sherlock’s hand. “I remember when they wouldn’t let me see you after you were shot.” He shudders a bit at the memory. “It was horrible. I didn’t know whether you were dead or alive for hours. I had to wait for Mycroft before they’d tell me anything.”

Sherlock looks down at their joined hands again, obviously lost in thought. “I was so scared,” he mutters, almost inaudibly. 

“You held it together like a hero for Rosie, though,” John says with a fond smile, remembering Sherlock and Rosie just before he was wheeled into surgery, Rosie holding on to Sherlock’s hand in a death grip, Sherlock white as a sheet but outwardly composed, explaining calmly to Rosie that John would be just fine.

“I was sick in the bathroom when Mrs Hudson came to take her home,” Sherlock mutters, still addressing their entwined hands. 

John smiles fondly. “I won’t tell her if you don’t.”

“John-” Sherlock looks up from their joined hands. “This is going to sound incredibly stupid-”

“We should get married,” John says, interrupting Sherlock.

Sherlock looks gobsmacked, and John congratulates himself silently for managing to surprise Sherlock Holmes. 

Sherlock blinks a few times in the way he has when his mind palace crashes, so John decides to take over the talking out loud part of the conversation. “I’ve thought about it before, but it never seemed urgent. But you know what I thought yesterday, when I saw you standing there? If anything happens to me, they’ll send Rosie to live with my sister, and we can’t let that happen.”

“But-” Sherlock blinks again. “But we’re not-”

“Sleeping together?”

Sherlock nods and actually blushes a bit. “I don’t-”

“You don’t want that, and I understand. I don’t, either. I know you don’t like sex, and I’m not interested in a sexual relationship with you,” John says gently. “But you’re everything else to me. You’re my friend, my confidante, my rock, my partner, my co-parent. My family. We live together, we work together, we’re raising a child together. You know how often I get asked if I have a partner? I never hesitate to say yes because that’s what you are.”

“You said romantic entanglements would complete me,” Sherlock says, his voice hoarse with emotions, his eyes wide and uncertain.

“That was six years ago, and I’ve learned a lot since then. You taught me a lot. Love is complicated, I get that now. And I love you. Not conventionally, but since when do we do anything the conventional way?”

Sherlock smiles slightly, but says nothing, so John continues,  “I was always looking for someone who’d stick with me, someone to spend my life with. Well, you’re it for me, Sherlock, and if that’s a problem for you, you’d better tell me right now, because otherwise, you’re stuck with me for good.”

“Not a problem,” Sherlock says, and there’s an expression on his face John has never seen before. Soft and gentle and hopeful. “You’re it for me as well.” He pauses. “And - I love you too. In case that was in any way unclear.”

John smiles, overcome with relief. “So that’s a yes, then? To the whole marriage, adopt the Gremlin, stay with me forever thing?”

“Yes,” Sherlock says, brushing a soft kiss over their joined hands. “That’s a yes.”

I think I never wrote Ace Sherlock/heterosexual John before, but there's a first time for everything. Fluff of the tooth-rotting variety here, sorry for the sappiness two days in a row.

Thanks for keeping us going with the challenges, @calaisreno!

Tagging a few people again: @keirgreeneyes @helloliriels @jrow @meetinginsamarra @catlock-holmes @khorazir @lisbeth-kk @thetimemoves @topsyturvy-turtely @fluffbyday-smutbynight @7-percent @the-reading-lemon and anyone else who wants to play!

[skylarmoon71]

Castiel (Supernatural/Grimm) - Short Story - Chapter 2

“So you’re saying she’s from another universe and over there these ‘Wesen’ are like the monsters we hunt here but they’re inside of people.” 

You nod at Dean's analysis. 

“I know it sounds crazy but everything Castiel told you is true. I can’t believe she actually blasted us into another universe. When I get a hold of Diana I’m gonna kill her.” 

Dean grins. “It’s still sort of crazy the way you stood against Crowley.” 

“It’s like he couldn’t touch you.” Sam adds.

“It’s probably because my mom is a witch.” 

“Seriously!” You nod at Dean. 

“Wait, I thought Grimms hunted these Wesen. If your dad is a Grimm then how did he end up shagging a witch?” 

“Hexenbiest, by the way, thank you for that mental image. That’s exactly what I want in my head.” 

“Sorry.” Dean just shrugs.

You just let out another exasperated sigh. 

“My parents were in a complicated situation, but they love each other and that’s all that matters. Right now my family tree isn’t the biggest issue. My sister is missing. She should have ended up here with me but she’s not. If we’re in some different universe then I need to start looking for her. Even Diana is going to have some difficulty navigating through here. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.” 

Sam nods. 

“Alright, maybe if you tell us exactly what spell she casted we can figure out what it did or where she is. What were you trying to do?” 

It’s a logical question, but going back over the entire conversation with your sister earlier that day, you feel a bit embarrassed. 

“Diana, I’m exhausted, what are you doing?” 

You’re laying on the couch in the trailer. The training had gone on a lot longer than you anticipated. You were still wearing some of your gear. Diana was hunched over a book missing something. 

“I told you I’m tired of you fighting me on this. You won’t listen to logic so I’ll just have to show you.” 

You groan. 

“Are you really going on about this whole love thing again? I told you I’m fine. Stop messing around. Dad told you to stop playing with those spells. Mom too. I’m not getting in trouble again. I’m too old to be getting scolded by my parents. I’ve got to be at the precinct bright and early tomorrow anyway so I don’t have time to run through some cleanse at Rosalee’s like the last time.” 

Diana laughs awkwardly. 

“That was a minor miscalculation, but this time I’ve perfected it.”

“Perfected what?” 

You finally lift your head just in time to see her drop something into the bowl. A fire sparks up and you gasp, but she just smiles. 

“D-Diana stop!!” 

“Too late, hold on!!”

Her excited yell was the last thing you remember before the room went white.

Lifting your gaze, you chance a look over at Castiel who already seems to be staring in your direction. He’s all the way across the room, standing awkwardly at attention. You shouldn’t feel a thing, but whenever you look at him it just..

“Hey, earth to Supergirl.” 

Dean’s snarky remark pulls your attention back. 

“The spell doesn’t matter, we just need to find her. We should start with any reports of weird occurrences in the area. If I landed here she can’t be far behind. I’m gonna grab something to eat.” You stand before they can speak, grabbing the change on the dresser. 

“Hey, that’s mine!!” Dean calls.

The door slams shut and Sam holds back a smile. 

“She’s like a version of you Dean. Even the machete.” 

“Shut up Sammy!” 

Castiel’s eyes are trained on the door. 

“She’s hiding something.” 

“Yeah, no shit Sherlock. What I want to know is how did her dad bang a witch.” 

“Really Dean, that’s your big question?” 

“It’s a pretty big one.” 

At this point they shouldn’t expect any different. 

Castiel is still standing a bit protectively at the door. 

“We shouldn’t let her wander off on her own.” 

“Relax, demons can’t touch her, honestly I’d feel sorry for any sad sap that tried anything.” Dean assures. 

“Still, she should not be alone.” 

Castiel’s words had Dean squinting. 

“What’s with you, you're acting like a guard dog.” 

Castiel shifted in place avoiding eye contact and slowly a smile began to form on Dean’s face. 

“No way, you like her don’t you Cas.” 

He didn’t respond, but they both saw the way his cheeks flushed at the insinuation. 

“If you want I can give you some tips lover boy.” Dean wiggled his eyebrows and Castiel disappeared. 

“Stop messing with him.” Sam scolds. 

“Come on, it’s cute, he’s got a crush.” 

Sam had a feeling Dean was only getting started. 

[iguessitsjustme]

Love Sea Ep 3 Thoughts

I just had the kind of day that makes you fall back in love with life a little bit. So what better time to watch Love Sea than right now? I will say I have been warned that certain parts of this episode will make me angry. So odds are, if you like the show, you won’t like my thoughts. But I’ll go in with an open mind. Episode 2 was fine. Right? Right. Anyway, just in case, if you click the read more and you don’t like what I say…that’s on you. You were warned. So let’s do this thing. Episode 3 time.

This time the movie I watched before this show didn’t have literally the best sound mixing I’ve ever heard in my entire life. So I think my ears are safe this time. It won’t be good but at least I’m not going from the best to…this.

IQIYI translate texts challenge 2k24. I said it last time and I’ll say it again. I am very skilled. I have many talents. Reading Thai is not one of them. What’s the point of paying for this streaming service if they’re only gonna half ass the subs? Anyway. Give the translators a raise and hire more of them. Or face my wrath in the form of one tiny little post under a read more on the internet that you will never see. But you should feel my scorn. Feel it!

Rak better keep his glasses. I swear if Rak loses his glasses….

It is raining in the show so I feel the need to tell y’all that I bought two umbrellas today! They were both on clearance. Isn’t that great? My collection grows.

Oh also IQIYI translate the fucking spoken words too challenge??? Girl what is going on.

I have no context for this line. Zero. Why are they talking about her boobs? What is happening in the rest of the conversation. Cause I also can’t speak Thai. I wish I could. That language is simply not in my wheelhouse.

I could be watching the Stray Kid’s cover of Sherlock for the millionth time but instead I’m listening to a Thai phone call that means nothing to me. All I know is she mentioned her boobs.

Noisy drunk street people go home challenge. Go home and stop conversatin right outside my apartment. Do that elsewhere. You have now left the bar cause it’s closed. My apartment is not open for business so I don’t know why you’re loitering outside it. Time to blast some kpop real quick. That typically works. Oh they left before I got to play any music. They must have a sixth sense.

Thank god I got this conversation fully subbed. The fuck is up with his dad? Actually. You know what? I don’t want to know. Whatever it is, it’s bad. And I don’t want that. I don’t trust MAME to do trauma actually. Well. I trust MAME will do trauma but I don’t trust her to do it well.

I STILL CAN’T READ THAI.

I did not gain that skill in the last 15 minutes. Why are they doing this to me specifically?

I am enjoying this song a whole lot.

Why are we getting flashbacks in every episode? MAME is a better writer than this. Why is she relying so heavily on flashbacks? I’m so confused.

Rak, do not go to a secondary location with that man. Dear Mut, what the fuck? He has said no. That is a complete sentence. And believe it or not, he does not need to explain it to you. He was being generous by telling you why he said no. But you are going to force him to go somewhere else? Have you considered I hate you and will kick you right in the balls?

The music is trying to convince me this is romantic but honestly I’m just confused.

THEY DIDN’T EVEN WEAR HELMETS. And then my soul was launched from my body straight into the sun and I feel nothing anymore.

Oh to be stargazing on a beach while laying next to a hot boy and having deep conversations about life. Oh if only that were me. Hey real quick, anyone want to go stargazing with me? I’ve never been stargazing and I think I should do it. 

I’ve only been watching this episode for 23 minutes. I thought it was almost over. This shit is dragging. The directing in this show needs significant work. There is not enough movement on screen in far too many scenes. Even when We Are had two characters (Tan and Fang) just standing and talking, it wasn’t difficult to watch because they were both constantly moving. Well, mostly Tan. But Fang did too. There was something for the eye to catch. Something to watch. With Love Sea, they have Rak and Mut just stand and talk, or sit and talk, or lay down and talk, and there is not nearly enough movement. They need to be doing something. I am moving more just sitting on my ass on my couch (shoveling cake in my mouth) while I watch than these two are doing on screen and that is a directorial problem. Imagine working with an established actor pair who are known partially for their chemistry together and just…having them lay there. I was prepared to go into this show mad at it for the typical MAME reasons but honestly, I’m mostly mad that the show elements are bad. The writing is not up to MAME’s usual standard and the directing is ass. The music is par for the course and I’m more objective about it this week at least.

FINALLY. Some movement. God that took forever.

It must be nice to be able to read Thai and know what the fuck is being said.

People stop reading over Rak’s shoulder. Let him have some privacy. The fuck?

If someone forcibly made me cover up like that on a hot day, I would pull a gun outta my ass and shoot them. It is HOT. I am SWEATY. Let me BREATHE.

MUT. NO DOES ME NO. BUT NOT WHEN YOU’RE TRYING TO OVERRIDE SOMEONE’S AUTONOMY. LET RAK’S TITS BREATHE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. LET THEM BREATHE.

Save Mook. Seriously. Save her.

Horny boys.

This scene would have far more emotional impact if we had any more time with these characters. Literally we started the episode with Rak refusing to go somewhere with Mut and being forced to go. And now he’s willing to stay? Doesn’t he believe love is a figment of the imagination? Did that fucking change? Did we see that change? Was it in one of the texts I couldn’t read?

I’m not…angry at this show. I mean Mut is never gonna be my favorite and neither is Rak, but MAME has had far worse cough cough PrapaiSky cough cough This show’s problem is actually the worst problem a show can have: it’s boring. I’m bored. The writing is lazy, the directing is abysmal, and honestly the sound mixing thinks it’s doing something and utterly failing. Those are the only three things I feel I’m knowledgeable enough to comment on but I’m sure the rest isn’t great either. I’m upset that I can’t even be mad at the characters. Cause it’s all so boring. When did I go back in time to get a BL that was so poorly written as to be a joke? It’s 2024. I refuse to believe this is what they put together. For all its faults, LITA was at least entertaining. At least it didn’t ruin my lovely day. I am gonna go get ready for bed now because unfortunately, I have to work in the morning. Oh to have a summer off. Oh to go to the sea and stargaze at the beach. I can’t believe this show managed to make even that boring.

[ceilingfan5]

Setting Z would be really funny for Barry Bluejeans

“Hurry up and figure things out, before I get fired from a second morgue. Please?” Barry Bluejeans is near tears, or violence. Or maybe just sitting on the floor. The buttons are all very close to each other on his mental keyboard.

“The please is a nice touch,” Kravitz acknowledges pleasantly. “I don’t think it’ll work, but I appreciated it.” 

“Hush your vibes,” Taako says, putting his hands to his temples and cocking an eyebrow intensely. “I’m getting a message from the afterlife.”

“Taako, you don’t have to do the act for us,” Barry complains. “We know you aren’t psychic.” 

“Says who! I’m offended. Let me at ‘em. I’ll prove it with my hands tied behind my back!”

“Use your hands to solve the murder, maybe,” Kravitz suggests wryly. He leans against the metal of the Fridge and jumps, probably because it’s cold as fuck. Barry makes that mistake like three times a day. 

“Or don’t, don’t touch the body, I swan to John, Taako, I know I owe Lup a favor but-”

“More than just a favor, mon ami!” 

“Not bad enough to get fired and arrested in the same day!” Barry starts pacing again, you know, so he doesn’t have to spin that violence/tears/floor roulette wheel. What a variety of options he has for himself! “Your stupid act may have the cops fooled, but I’m-”

“What, a genius?” Taako puts his hands on his hips. “Look at this man.”

“Ex-man,” Kravitz suggests.  

“Oh yeah? Good for h- oh you mean dead.”

“Taako, Robbie is going to be back any minute. I can’t just have people in here! Especially,” he gives Taako a Very Serious Look Tee Em. “If they aren’t being helpful.” 

“I’m so helpful. Notice, in fact,” he gestures like he’s about to do some woo-woo psychic bullshit, but thinks better of it. “That he has been frozen.” 

“Like a corpsicle,” Kravitz suggests. 

“Kravitz,” Barry says, strained. “You’ve gotta stop. I’m going to get an ulcer.”

“Fuck you man, Kravitz is patently amusing.” Taako points a finger with intent at Barry. 

“Well, I’m about to be hilarious. Find out why our corpsicle is freezer burnt, or you’re fucking out of here.” 

“Ooh, he said fucking,” Taako whispers behind his hand to Kravitz. Kravitz snickers. Barry grips the table and gets ready to lose it, it either being his patience or his livelihood, when Taako gasps. 

“What,” Barry asks, so tersely it doesn’t deserve a question mark. 

“Peas!”

“Peas?”

“Peas.” Kravitz nods like he knows about the peas. In fact it appears that the only guy out of the legume loop. 

“E-lab-or-ate.” 

“This guy worked for the frozen food factory,” Taako says, all in a rush, bouncing now that he’s figured it out. “Oh my god, call that bitch of a cop, I’ve figured it out.”

“Tell me now! You can do your goddamn Sherlock reveal later!” 

“Oh my god,” Kravitz says. “He worked in the chicken nugget area, but he was found in the frozen peas.”

“So this could only mean one thing!”

Barry glowers at these two idiots, not least because he very much wants to be in on their Sherlock Bullcrap. 

“What?” Taako snickers. “You didn’t figure it out?” 

“You know, I do a lot for you two wingdings,” Barry starts. “After all this time, you’d think- Wait. Hang on.”

“He’s getting it,” Taako whispers to Kravitz. 

“This is great,” Kravitz says behind his hand, entirely audible. “Way better than pharmaceuticals.” 

“Hang on, fuck, hang on. This isn’t the chicken nugget guy. This man is a twin.”

“Bingo.” 

“The banker twin?”

“The banker twin.” 

“Oh my god.”

“Bingo bango, even.” 

“He froze the peas guy’s assets–”

“And the peas guy froze him.” 

“Jesus fursuit wearing Christ,” Barry says, deciding to finally sit on the floor. He can’t control the words that start streaming out of him. “You- you guys know that most deaths that come in here aren’t like, fun little mysteries? Like you’re aware it’s mostly heart attacks and shit? Like, this is entirely unrealistic, and honestly since you two have started doing this-”

“Shh, Barry,” Taako says, getting out his phone. “We’ve got a scene to pull. For fame and glory.” 

“And about a hundred fifty bucks each,” Kravitz adds. 

“Oh, it’s one hundred now,” Barry says, pulling it together enough to flash them a bitchy smile. “You want my help, you’re paying for it.” 

“Aw, damn it,” Taako mumbles. “You were right, Krav.” 

[imeternallylove]

Secret - S.Holmes; part five

Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x Reader

Genre: purely angst, upcoming age and some smut

Warning: none

Word: 2k

main mastetlist  | request & ask | prompts | theme song

Chapters index

prologue | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part night | part ten | part eleven | part twelve | part thirteen | epilogue

"All right, ladies. Let’s see what we still didn’t have."

You parked the car and gave yoghurt milk to two little girls, then kicked the driver's door shut with your knee. Took Zoe and Elle to entry the great mall, where two or three items for both of the girls' parade outfits had to be purchased.

You got a call from Elle's father this afternoon explaining that her mother needed to stay in the hospital for emergency surgery, so you volunteered to pick Elle up and send her home today.

"Please, please, please mummy! Elle and me need a chaplet, can you make it with your flowers?" Zoe pleaded. She's embracing your legs and hopping up and down, her puppy dog eyes shining brightly exactly same as the way her father did.

Since when did you become effortlessly swayed by those huge and splendid eyes?

You exhaled loudly and conceded defeat, knowing that saying no would never end it. "I promised I’ll make the most gorgeous floral chaplet for you two, but I need you both to be on your best behaviour now, okay?" You told them firmly before smiling at their overjoyed expressions.

"Can I have a pinkie pinkie carnation, auntie Y/N?" Elle asks you, tugging on the outer edge of your sleeve. "Of course, darling," you answer gently. I'm going to make pinkie pinkie for you and baby blue for Zo-zo!"

Your daughter and Elle giggled with glee, "yes, yeah! Thank you so much, auntie!"

You hold both your daughter's and Elle’s hand as you head them toward through a crowded area filled with people who all appeared to be renowned or very important. You froze on the edge of the mall for a split second, peering around the mall wide-eyed.

Then Sherlock showed up with a broad smile on his face, and you almost had forgotten how to breathe, when he walks through the crowd come to your way.

“Oh! Uncle Detective!" Your daughter exclaimed with delighted happiness.

How the fuck did he get here? It’s like a god trying to play shit over your head, because everywhere you went, you'd run into his curly brown hair and black long coat.

"Remember, best behaviour," you whispered under your breath to the girls before straightening up and smiling a little shyly at Sherlock, see him with nice fits class suit again, who was approaching you. You still hadn't decided what you were going to say to him.

“Hey. Don’t tell me you are here to watch me and John, eh?” He exclaimed quite loudly near your ear, his arms flailing at his sides as if confused what to do. You then observed that there was a little chaos behind Sherlock's back, with police, hospital staff, and a slew of media. Still, you could tell he was perplexed, and he began to suspect the two toddlers who were hidden slightly under your legs.

You scrunched up your nose awkwardly, trying to think of something to say. Zoe is already taken aback when she sees the real Sherlock, her 'Uncle Detective'. She has no idea that the man in front of her is her father, whom she had been requesting to see for several weeks. "Nah. It wasn't even close to the truth.” You pretend to laugh and it’s so dryly. “Well, er, I just bring the girls here to shopping," you stated carefully, telling him half the truth. "But why do you look like an actor or something? Mr detective?"

He chuckled and ran a delicate hand through his hair before returning his focus to the girls. "And who exactly are these two?" With a wide smile on his face, he asked, stooping down to get closer to their level.

As you could have predicted, hiding them was no longer necessary. "This is Zoe and this is Elle," you introduced them, letting them walk out from between your legs while maintaining a firm grip on both of them. Behind your ostensibly calm demeanour, you were uncomfortably holding your imaginary breath, asking with any god who might listen for Sherlock not to recognise himself in Zoe as you did.

"It's nice to meet you, Elle," Sherlock remarked warmly, putting out his hand to Zoe.

"I'm Zoe, that's Elle!" Your daughter said quickly, placing her bag on the floor so she could shake his hand. You felt yourself holding your breath as they touched, Sherlock's large hand curling around Zoe's. It was peculiar to watch the two of them interact, father and daughter, and neither of them acknowledged it.

Sherlock, too, shook Elle's hand before looking up at you. "Did you enjoy shopping here? Sorry for the inconvenience; the mess will be cleaned up in half an hour." He said, his gaze darting between the three of you.

Zoe didn't hold back and soon began expressing her delight. "We just reached here and it was incredible! This mall is so big! Uncle Detective!" She flowed, barely pausing to breathe between reports.

“Ohㅡ Wow! I'm Uncle Detective now? Would you like to meet Grandpa Detective? John Watson over there." Sherlock replied, tilting his head and beaming at the two girls, whose faces lit up like fireflies in the dark. "I'll take that as a yes," he laughed, rising to his feet and peering over his shoulder.

Then you notice the man who was busy chatting to a group of workers come in, a small greet happened, his name is Lestrade, and Sherlock will make its way back to his jobs.

Meanwhile, your daughter was shaking with excitement. You'd never seen her act this way before...But you'd seen it in Sherlock: it was exactly how he reacted when he got 100 scores on a biography exam. Seeing that in your daughter made you smile and panic at the same time. She was exactly like him without even trying.

"Does Little Zoe look like she needs something?"

"Perhaps some selfies with superstars like you." In response, you put on an artificial wide grin.

As Zoe's favourite person approached, she instantly wrenched free of your grip and ran halfway towards him, Elle joining her in an instant. He knelt on the ground and hugged the girls tightly. You quickly reached for your phone: Zoe would be upset for a week if you didn't capture a photo for her wall.

Sherlock stood beside you, poking you in the ribs with his elbow. "They are your children?" He asked a solemn expression taking over his usually jovial features. 

Your heart sank with fear. What exactly were you intended to say? Should you tell him Zoe was your daughter? He wouldn't instinctively think she was his daughter, would he? Would telling him Zoe was your daughter just raise additional questions? Oh, you were facetious, of course it would. You were talking about the great detective, Sherlock Holmes..

"They're part of a programme I volunteer for," you lied, your gaze fixed on your phone so you wouldn't have to look up and see his face. He would know you were lying just by looking at him. "Someone else was supposed to come today, but they needed emergency surgery, so I'm here instead," you explained gently. It ached to lie to him, but there was no other option without destroying his universe.

"You still should have told me," he said next to you. He sounded glum, but when you caught a look of him, he was beaming like a complete idiot, watching Zoe and Elle converse happily together. Your heart tightened silently, wishing it was a smile of fatherly love.

You sighed quietly and turned to face him, feeling bad for all of the lies. "Will the meal at lunch make up for it?" You offered, lightly touching his arm. 

He smiled at you, lifting your hand from his arm and gripping it tightly between his own fingers. "It's a start," he teased, lingering around your hand before returning it to your side. 

The absence of his touch brought you back to your senses, and you shook your head as if to clear your mind. "Zoe, let the poor man breathe for a second," you reprimanded as the girls dropped their chokeholds on the attractive man, and that man is Zoe’s father.

However, duty called, and Sherlock's existence as a renowned guy drew him away from you to give an interview to a mob of journalists. You gathered the ladies and walked towards to find the listed of items you need should be, the shopping category, not knowing what to do. As you approached the entrance, Sherlock caught your gaze and grimaced. Instead of dragging him away, you simply held up your phone and smiled at him, told the girls to waving ‘bye bye’ to their Uncle Detective before leading them out.

Sherlock is beaming and waving at you three in responses, while something about you appears to be over his head.

The cab ride back to the flat was peaceful, with John calmly watching the lights of the London Eye pass by the windows. The case today had been physically tough on every investigation team from New Scotland Yards, and now that the adrenaline had left Sherlock's body, he was drowsy  Instead of feeling enthusiastic that he had solved another puzzle, he was satisfied to just sit back and think about seeing you at the mall today.

When he saw you in the crowd, he couldn't believe it. It was like the throng vanished the moment your eyes met his, and all he could see was you, shining in front of him under your own tiny spotlight. Seeing you babysitting the girls instantly re-energized him, removing his exhaustion and leaving him determined to put on a good behaved as John needs when him and John start interviewing.

Seeing you in the throng reminded Sherlock of the days when you'd cheer him on at high school and football games, screaming the loudest and applauding the most vigorously. With a quiet sigh, he realised to himself what he should have known all along: he missed having you by his side.

"Sherlock, who was the woman you introduced to me today?" John asked abruptly, his gaze returning to the hushed car.

Sherlock exhaled a long breath and turned in his seat to face his flatmate. "She's just a girl I went to school with," he explained, missing a few key facts like how you were his best friend, the only woman he used to have sex with.

However, as he grew older, John became increasingly perceptive. "Is she just a girl? Come on, Sherlock, I saw your face when she showed up. I think she's more than just a girl," he spoke with a chuckle.

"She's a friend, but only that," he said, tugging his collar up to hide his blushing cheeks. He'd mentioned you to his friend in passing when telling a story, but he'd never gone into detail about what you meant to him. "We've been friends for years but lost contact when I moved to Boston," he added, pinching his lips together to keep the smile from expanding.

John leaned back and crossed his arms across his chest. "And the kids? Were they hers?" Curious, John questioned.

Sherlock quickly shook his head and reached into his bag for his drink. "No, they're part of a programme with which she volunteers," he replied, taking a long gulp to moisten his throat.

"Hmm," John hummed back, stretching his lips as if engrossed in concentration. "I thought one of the girls in blue dress looked a hell of a lot like her," he remarked gently, smiling up at Sherlock's face. "Are you going to see her again?"

Sherlock nodded and gulped hard, still drinking. "Lunch next week, I think," he claimed triumphantly, a smug grin on his lips. 

"Do you want me to clear the flat that day, or are you planning on staying in a hotel?" With a sly smirk, John mocked Sherlock, quickly dodging his strike. 

Sherlock turned his back on his childish friend and glanced out the window at the blur of lights, frowning cutely till a small crease formed on his brow. All he could think of were the secret wardrobe visits at school and the late-night phone calls in the back of his mind. His fingertips could recall how smooth your skin felt under his touch, and his lips were still etched with the memory of your kiss.

You were so pretty when you were younger, but as you grew older, you were even more beautiful, with curves defining your body and making Sherlock nervous anytime he saw you.

Returned his phone to his pocket, Sherlock had just texted Mycroft for your civilian information which he only received ‘I am busy,’ in response from his brother but he knew soon the report of yours lifeline will be forward to his mail box. He knows it's a bad idea, but you never know how much his grief was caused by your insistent efforts to fade away from his life when he studied relentlessly in Boston. 

Six years later, you still had no idea how much of an effect you had on his heartbeat.

tag: @bunny-skz00 @zen003xx @cemak

[topsyturvy-turtely]

SNEAK PEEK at chapter two of MISSING!

A/N: happy birthday @safedistancefrombeingsmart!! 🥳🥳🥳 originally wanted to finish chapter 2 of missing (which is based on smartin''s edit) for you but life is too busy for me lately. however i wanted to prove i am actually (kinda) working on chapter 2 surprise you a tiny bit so here is the shortened version of the beginning of chapter two!! i hope you enjoy it. guess i'm kinda glad to know you 😜😘 hope you are having a wonderful day!

please keep in mind, that this is a draft! "[…]" signals that this is a part that i am not yet publishing. the word document got about 2100w so, i am really not that bad at writing ch2! (if we ignore that i didn't even get to the important part yet…)

WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER ONE! read first chapter on ao3!

~~~

Even before Sherlock had left the hospital building, he called Lestrade. He started talking before Lestrade could start an unnecessary greeting phrase, “Tell me every little detail you know about this case. And I mean everything.”

“Sherlock?!”, Greg asked. “Where the heck are you?! One minute you were here looking at the-“

“Charing Cross Hospital. John is hurt. Badly. In fact, he is-“, Sherlock’s breath caught in his throat.

He exhaled, seeing John unconsciously laying in the hospital bed, the bloody arm- arm stump. It wasn’t the blood that bothered him so much. It was the bones, the veins, the tendons - everything that was supposed to be attached to John’s hand for god’s sake – that made him feel sick, angry, and terrified. What if John was never gonna have his hand back? Never be able to cook, read, tie his shoes again? Sherlock knew for a fact it would make John miserable, absolutely heartbreakingly miser-

He had to focus. Find the hand. To find the hand, he had to know more about the case. He finally finished his sentence. “John is missing a hand. The doctor said she can reattach it, but it has to be quick. Give me everything you know. I am not going into details.”

“Shit, Sherlock. That is horrible- holy shit. Are you sure you are okay searching-”

“Greg.”, the consulting detective’s voice was sharp, intolerant. He could not lose any more time. “This is not the time for compassion towards me. This is about John. Finding his hand is my first and foremost priority. Tell me everything about this case. Now.”

Lestrade finally seemed to overcome his temporary attack of compassion and started to lay out the case to Sherlock.

[…]

"That’s it! That’s their connection!”, Sherlock concluded after their conversation.

“You- That’s true. Thank you, Sherlo-“

The consulting detective hung up on him. He raised a hand to call a cab. He got one immediately. “Just over Hammersmith Bridge. Drive fast, I’ll double the fare.”

"In a hurry, mate?”

Sherlock glared at the cabbie through the rearview mirror. The cabbie’s smirk left his mouth, because he hurriedly shifted into first gear and drove away. He was fast but not as fast as Sherlock would have liked. Sherlock paid with a generous amount anyways. Thames Path, secluded somewhere between the trees. That’s where John was found. The nurse had given him coordinates and with his phone Sherlock found the place pretty quickly.

Branches were snapped, dirt was posched up, a pool of blood was in the middle of a clearing. Sherlock got close, knelt down, tried to find more clues.

Then he heard shouting, he looked up but his vision was blocked by darkness, a heavy smell stung his nose and then Sherlock hit the ground with his back.

~~~

A/N: i hope you don't mind me tagging a few more people? and i hope the people don't mind either xD it's just that most comments on ao3 were like "OMG CONTINUE ASAP!" so i thought... that would maybe nice of me to tag other people? even though i did yet another cliffhanger with this teaser... whoops.

tag list! (tell me if you wanna be added or removed please 💚) @justanobsessedpan @helloliriels @catlock-holmes @fluffbyday-smutbynight @inevitably-johnlocked @hisfavouritejumper @rhasima @forfucksakejohn @ohlooktheresabee @turbulenttrouble @so-youre-unattached-like-me @totallysilvergirl @peanitbear @train-mossman @loki-lock @smulderscobie @timberva @grace-in-the-wilderness @chinike @jawnn-watson @whatnext2020 @escapingthereality @missdeliadili @kettykika78 @musingsofmyown @7-percent @speedymoviesbyscience @astudyin221b @francj15 @ladylindaaa @we-r-loonies @mxster-jocale @sherlockcorner @noahspector @our-stars-graveside @jobooksncoffee @macgyvershe @myladylyssa @battledress @a-victorian-girl @dreamerofthemeadow @oetkb12 @ohnoesnotagain @mutedsilence @jawnscoffee @raenchaosandcozyadashofmurder @lisbeth-kk @quickslvxrr @compact-and-beautiful

[fancyfeathers]

Society of Protection (Yandere Bungo Stray Dogs x reader x original characters) (normalized yandere au)

Chapter Ten

A Composer’s Kiss

Prologue and oc intro

Chapter one

Chapter two

Chapter three

Chapter four

Chapter five

Chapter six

Chapter seven, part one

Chapter seven, part two

Chapter eight

Chapter nine

In his office there sat a young man, in one arm he held a pen as he scribbled something down on loose paper, in the other he he,d a baby girl, fast asleep, and cuddled in a pink blanket. It was after dinner but not late still, the sun had just set. Next to the desk he sat at where two hard back suitcases, which made sense since in how much of rush he appeared in. His tie was undone, hair messy, bags under his eyes, but he still cared for his daughter, rocking her back and forth, kissing her of the forehead, letting her grab on his hair or fingers when she needed something to hold. The door opened and another young man with brown hair entered, the man at the desk stood up, still holding his baby. “Tolkien, about damn time, you’re here.”

“I came as soon I could.” The professor said, walking over to his detective friend. “I understand you can’t tell me everything but what do you need?”

The detective looked down at the baby in his arms and the professor quickly got the idea. “She’s my daughter, and you’re like my brother, I would trust her with no one else. I need you to get her out of here, out of the country, far away from here, the other side of the world for all I care.” 

“Arthur, you need to give up this detective shit, you need to leave behind Sherlock Holmes, for her-“

“This isn’t about that, it’s… he knows about her ability.” The detective said, handing one of the suitcases to the professor whose face wore an expression of horror.

“No, I thought he died. I was there, we were there, Arthur.” The professor spoke as the detective walked back to the desk, taking what he was writing and handing it to his friend. 

“This is letter to her, give it to her when it’s time. It’ll explain everything but until then you can’t let her know about any of this, not even her ability. The only other people who have any idea about this are the Austen, I gave little Zelda the key to my house in Yokohama in Japan.” The professor looked the letter over before tucking it away. The detective looked down at the baby he held in his arms, he pressed his forehead against his daughter’s, tears falling down his face. “I love you, I’m so sorry. You deserve so much more than I could give you. Hopefully your…” He looks up at his friend, watching the sad scene. “…uncle can give you that world. I love you, (Name).”

The detective handed you off to his friend who also had tears in his eyes. “I’ll take care of her, Arthur. I’ll protect her with my life.”

“I know you will, John. I know you will.”

…and he did… that man was your uncle, the same man who raised you far away from where your father lived. He raised you, like a normal child with his wife, a normal relationship you grew up witnessing. They raised you with no clue about any of this, far away in Yokohama…

—————————

The driver took you to the safe house of the society, it was a very nice manor about an hour drive from Yokohama. Everyone else was there except for Alexandre and Gaston who were said to be staking out at the Guild hideout where Q was being kept. When you entered the main entry, everyone swarmed to greet you, everyone but William, the only other person to know that was here. Everyone was wondering what took you so long and what did you do with Miss Jane and then silence as they realized Miss Jane wasn’t there and you were shaking like a leaf. The doctor stepped forward. “(Name), where is Jane?”

You didn’t say a word, you only reached into your pocket and handed her the letter. As she was opening it, William gently grabbed you and escorted you out of the room to the lounge saying. “I’ll get some tea started for you.”

You started sobbing yourself once more that you didn’t even hear the cry of agony from the doctor in the front entry as she read the letter. 

—————————

For the next few hours no one said a thing, just silent crying and touches of comfort, but not you. You sat alone on a lounge chair, legs curled up to your chest, you sat in complete and stunned silence. That is until you heard the front doors open again and you see from your spot in the lounge Gaston and Alexandre walk in, accompanied by a figure walking alongside your friends, Osamu Dazai. 

“Sorry for being late everyone, turned out things escalated a tad and we had to pitc-“ Alexandre cut himself off as he looked around the room to see Miss Jane not there. He closed his eyes and blinked a few tears back. “I guess what Gaston told me was true, she really did give herself up.”

“It is.” Dr. Stevenson nodded as she approached them, tear stains still stuck to her face. She glanced at Dazai with no emotion “There are a few extra rooms upstairs that you can stay in… I’m sorry please excuse me.”

You watched as the doctor ran off upstairs to her own room, presumably to cry. Dazai watched as well, his head tilted in curiosity. “So that file on Miss Austen was true? She was Fitzgerald’s wife”

You looked over your shoulder at them and called out in response. “And now she went back to him as a last resort.” 

Dazai hummed in thought as he walked over to where you sat and knelt down next to you. “You know the Guild, or Fitzgerald at least cause I don’t know about those guys we just fought, but he won’t stop until he gets what he ultimately wants, and that may just be Miss Austen but I doubt it.” His voice was serious as his eyes made contact with your own. “This is going to get a lot more dangerous, so unless you’re prepared for it I suggest you go back to that flower shop.”

You paused for a second as you thought, were you ready? “Dazai, can I ask you a favor?”

“For you, darling? Anything.” Something about his tone gave you shivers but you continued on.

“I want to go visit my uncle tomorrow, he… he has some things to explain, I want someone with an unbiased view to come with me. I would bring another society members but I don’t think I want them dragged into this mess.” You said, breaking eye contact with him and your eyes drifted to the corner your eyes where you saw Gaston watching this himself. “I just want to have cool mind with whatever I’m about to get myself into.”

“I would be happy to, my dear.” Dazai said standing up and patting your head, but he looked at you with a twinkle in his eyes and a smile across his face. “Buuut, I want a favor in return.”

“What is it?” You questioned and out of the corner of your eye you saw Gaston step forward slightly, almost defensively after hearing this. Dazai noticed to and looked over at the composer with a smile, the same one he gives you.

“It’s rude to ease drop, Leroux. You can come over here if you are so persistent on listening.” At Dazai’s words Gaston sneered but stepped forward to stand next to the two of you. Dazai looked back at you, still smiling. “But anyway it’s nothing you need to worry about right now, but call it the ace in my back pocket.”

Gaston’s eyes narrowed at Dazai when he said this and Gaston tapped you on the shoulder, getting your attention. “(Name), may I have a word...” His eyes looked to Dazai’s smiling face as he spoke and then back to you. “…privately.”

“Oh, um… sure. One moment, Dazai.” You got up and followed Gaston to a room towards the back of the manor, an old style ballroom. You watched as he closed the door behind the two of you, but forgetting to lock it in his rush, and closed all the windows and curtains, you watched him with worry. “Gaston, is everything alright?”

“No, I fear that we are only playing into his game.” Gaston said as he sat down at the piano bench, taking off his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose. “None of this feels right, like we’re only chess pieces on a board.”

“Him? Gaston who are you talking about? You’re scaring me.” You spoke as you sat next to him, placing your hand on his shoulder.

“I wish I could say you don’t need to be scared, but even I’m terrified.” He replied as he took out a white cloth to wipe off his glasses that he held in his hand. “I’m sure Miss Jane or Alexandre told you about my work for the European Union a few years ago. I was sent to track down a dangerous man, his mind was like mine they said. (Name)… they overestimated my abilities, he was a mad genius it felt like I was only running in circles.”

“You’re talking about Fyodor Dostoevsky, right?” 

He nodded and slipped on his glasses once more and looked you in the eye, a dead serious expression on his face. “I am, but (Name), from here on out you need to be careful of everything outside the society, trust no one, especially Dazai because he is playing this game with Fyodor Dostoevsky. Fyodor is in Yokohama.”

Your eyes widened in shock as he spoke these words. “S-so what? Why should I worry? He doesn’t know I exist, right?”

Gaston shook his head and you felt your heart sink at his words. “No, he knows exactly who you are. That break in that was framed to look like the mafioso, that was him. (Name) you can’t trust anyone, outside this society. Whatever you do, you cannot let him get you, do whatever you need to do, but if he gets you it will be all over.”

“Gaston, you mean he is after me?” Your words felt heavy and your stomach felt uneasy like you were about to be sick. Gaston nodded and you collapsed, shaking, in his arms, you were too afraid to even cry. “Gaston, please no. This can’t be true, please.”

“I-I…” For once the composer didn’t know what to say, he only held you. You could hear his heartbeat and it was like yours, fast in his panic. He was your first friend in years, first person outside your family who held you while you lived in fear, first person to show you the hope of tomorrow, and the first person who was willing to go through the struggles with you. “No more talk of darkness. I'm here, nothing can harm you. I'm here, with you, beside you, to guard you and to guide you.”

You looked up as he spoke to you in gentle and almost charming words. He placed his hand on your cheek, half expecting you to be crying after all of this, scared for your life but you only smiled at him in your fear. “Promise me that all you say is true, that's all I ask of you.”

“I promise you.” Then at his words something came over you, your hand drifted up to his scar. He jumped at first when you touched it but then he quickly relaxed in your touch as you brought your lips up to his. His lips were soft, not chapped at at, and you could taste the chapstick on them, sweet, strawberry perhaps. You two broke away after a moment that felt forever and he drifted his fingers to touch his lips in a bit of surprise. He laughed to himself. “This really shouldn’t be a romantic moment. After all I just told you that you should be scared for your life.”

“Hm… I think I would rather it be romantic than not being able to sleep tonight in fear.” You giggled in reply. Your eyes drifted to the grandfather clock in the corner of the ballroom, it was well past midnight now. You stood up and offered a hand to Gaston. “It’s late, we should be off to bed.”

“Well agreed.” He cleared his throat and took your hand. You to walked out of the ballroom, but as soon as Gaston went to close the door someone who was standing outside the door closed it. You both looked and saw Dazai. Gaston narrowed his eyes at him. “You were ease dropping.”

“Hm, maybe I was. I just have one question for you, darling.” Dazai spoke using that nickname but he didn’t look at you, he was looking at Gaston. “Say Fyodor is after lovely (Name), here. Do you think she’s the only one he’s after?”

You didn’t understand what Dazai was referencing but Gaston certainly did by his widened eyes and the sudden shake in his body. He quickly turned away from the two of you and began walking to his room. “Good night, (Name), Dazai.”

You looked at Dazai with a curious expression on your face and asked. “What were you talking about, Dazai?”

“Oh nothing you need to worry about right now. Just go get some sleep, Snow White. We have a big day tomorrow.” He gave you a light push to get you walking down the hall and then after a few steps you looked over your shoulder at him, he tilted his head and questioned. “What? Something wrong.”

“You said Snow White, she’s the one who was poisoned by the apple. Most people would say Sleeping Beauty. Why would you call me Snow White?”

He smiles and closes his eyes as he walks past you. “I dunno, just the first thing that came to mind.” 

For some reason you didn’t believe him but you had no real suspicion to be had here. “I see… well then good night, Dazai.”

—————————

The next morning you awoke and got ready, you were able to convince Dr. Stevenson to take one of the cars alone without a driver. You drove yourself with Dazai in the passenger seat. Like most drives these days it was mostly silent, except half way through the drive you spoke up. “You should probably read those papers in the glove box… those are important.”

He shrugged and opened the glove box, expecting to see driving papers or something, but instead finding the adoption papers and will. He read over them and got a shocked look on his face. “You’re Sherlock Holmes’ daughter?”

“Arthur Conan Doyle, but yes, I guess I am.” You said as you pulled up to your uncle’s neighborhood.

“You guess?”

“I never really knew him, he disappeared when I was a little girl, a baby.”

“I see.” He smiled slightly and looked back down at the papers. “If it helps, my coworker Ranpo is a pretty big fan of your father.”

“Not really, I mean that’s nice… my mind is just elsewhere…”

“Hm… food for thought?”

“Why did you ask Gaston that question last night?” You said as you stopped the car in front of your uncle’s house. “Why did you ask him that question about Fyodor?”

“You know how this world is.” He said, glancing out the window at the house and then back to you. “Lines of morality blur between love and lust to the point where right and wrong doesn’t matter anymore.”

“You mean Fyodor is also after Gaston?”

Dazai nodded. “As for why I couldn’t say but I can say that you and your composer friend are not the safest now, not just from Fyodor but others as well.”

You turned the car off as you lost yourself in thought before you rolled your eyes. “Whatever, look I just have to talk to my uncle, just let everything be with this for now.”

You two walked up the door of you uncle and aunt’s house and you knocked on the door and not a few moments later you saw your Aunt Edith open the door. She smiles and hugged you. “What a surprise, it is so lovely to see you (Name).”

“Hi auntie.” You gave her a squeeze back and let go as you entered inside. “This is my… friend from work, Dazai.”

You gestured to the detective as your aunt shook his hand. “It’s nice to meet you ma’am.”

“It’s lovely to meet you as well young man.” She said leading you to the living room where on the couch you saw your Uncle John, John Tolkien. When he heard footsteps he looked up from his book to look at you. He smiled and set his book aside. 

“It’s lovely to see you, (Name).” He glanced over your shoulder at Dazai. “Who’s your friend?”

“Oh Uncle John, this is my friend Dazai, we met via work?”

“At that flower shop?”

Fuck, you forgot to tell them about that. You shook your head and you sat down next to him. “No uncle, I…I quit. You see I got a new job with another organization from Europe the-“

“Society of Protection.” He sighed and smiled. “I assumed one day you would join. I’m then guessing that little Austen told you about your father?”

You nodded and took the papers from Dazai and gave them to your uncle. He looked them over again, with a sad expression. “Your father was a wonder man, a bit odd but wonderful. He loved you very much but some things happened.” He reached to the side table where there was a small chest, he opened it and took out a folded piece of paper. “He gave this to me to give to you when you were ready.”

With an unsteady hand you took the paper and before your eyes you saw the scene of when this was written, your father holding you, giving you to your uncle, the final goodbye. Then your mind snapped back to reality when Dazai touched your shoulder. You gasped for breath as you tried to process what just happened. “-what… what was that?”

“It seems you have discovered your gift… best if your father explains it than I.” Your uncle said pointing to the paper you held in your hands… you had a gift? Why were you only discovering this now? How is this possible? You were normal not even a month ago. With shaky hands you opened the piece of paper and it read…

My dearest (Name), 

How much you must have grown when you are reading this. I am so sorry I will have to miss so much of your life, but I know Tolkien will raise you like his own and hopefully far, far away from here. I know you must hate me for not being there and I do not blame you, but I want you to understand I do not have a choice if I want to keep you safe. I am about to set out on a case that will take years and that may cost me my life, but it is to stop a very bad man. Like me I only know him by an alias, Professor James Moriarty. If I leave him alone and use your gift to cause so much harm and I don’t want that for you. Which brings me to my next point, yes you are gifted, you have a special gift that may take time to control but when you touch a person, place, or thing you can see it’s past, call it The Final Problem. I trust you will use this information for the greater good. I love you so much, and I’m so sorry I will not be there.

Your loving father, 

Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes

“So my father went off to go face this professor?” You asked, your eyes still glued to the paper.

“Yes he did, we both thought him dead until this evening where he gave me this letter… and you.” Your uncle stood up and looked over the photos that rested on the fireplace. “I brought you here, it was far away from Europe and also an important place to your father, he handled quite a few cases here in Yokohama before the days of your little agency.” He laughed looking over at Dazai who had a smile, when he knew who he was.

“You’re quite smart Mr. Tolkien, how did you know?”

“I read the papers, young man. Not to mention I am the headmaster of the school your friend, Kunikida used to teach at.”

“You know Kunikida?”

“Quite well, hard to think he went from teaching mathematics to being a detective.” Your uncle laughs. 

—————————

After the meeting you drove Dazai back to the Armed Detective Agency and has he was stepping out of the car two individuals were coming out of the doors from the office, Dr. Yosano and Ranpo. They waved to Dazai as he got out tops the car. Dr. Yosano laughed to herself as she saw you in the drivers seat. “Spent the night with the society, huh? Kunikida is not gonna be happy with that.”

Dazai shrugs. “Eh, whatever, let him after all I just met (Name)’s uncle, his old boss when he was a teacher.” This earned chuckles from both the doctor and the young detective. “Anyway where are you off to?”

“Ranpo got an invitation for a challenge for a detective game from the Guild.” Dr. Yosano answered, holding out the invitation to Dazai. Dazai’s eyes looked over to you with a little smile on his face and before you could even say anything…

“You should take (Name) with you, after all her dad was one of the best detectives to ever walk the earth.”

Ranpo’s eyes lit up and he looked over to Dazai with a wide smile. “Who? Who was it?”

“Dazai no-“

“Sherlock Holmes.”

The next thing you know you’re driving in the car with Dr. Yosano in your passenger’s seat and Ranpo in your backseat talking your ear off with questions about your father.