#inspired by youtube

[mayflora-18]

Incorrect CoD Quotes #7

Sherlock, in response to being asked to sneak into Valeria’s house: Okay. Don’t worry, guys. I got your back!

*She steps behind Ghost*

Sherlock: From right here.

———

Laswell: Hey did you call General Shepherd a bitch?

Price: Yeaaahh! He changed the Wi-Fi password!

Laswell: You can’t be-

Nikolai: THAT BITCH CHANGED THE WI-FI PASSWORD!!!!

———

*Something bad and unexpected happens on a mission*

Nikolai: Why didn’t you tell me?!

Sherlock: Well, because I wanted us to fail.

Nikolai: 😑

Sherlock: OBVIOUSLY I DIDN’T KNOW!!!!

———

Graves: Hey, I always get the vibe that you, like, hate me or something.

Ghost: What?! Me, hate you?!

Ghost: …You’re right.

———

Soap: If I punch myself in the face and it hurts, am I strong or weak?

Ghost: Strong.

Gaz: Weak.

Price: A dumbass is what you are.

———

Alejandro: When I first met you, I thought you were weird and annoying.

Graves: …

Graves: And?

Alejandro: And you are.

———

Hadir: Sorry I’m late, I was… doing things.

*pounding footsteps can be heard from behind the door*

Alex, bursting through the door: HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!

Hadir: Push is such a strong word. I prefer calling it … giving you a little nudge.

Alex: Oh I’ll give you a nudge when I shove mY FOOT UP YOUR ASS!

Price, covering Farah’s ears: Hey! Watch your fucking language in front of the president!

———

Graves: Yo, what’s that song that goes like, “Despacito”?

Alejandro: Despacito?

Graves: Yeah. What’s the name?

Alejandro: DESPACITO

Graves: …Yeah. What’s the name?

Alejandro, pissed: Dios mío, you’re an idiot!

Graves: Thank you! Alexa, play “Dios mío, you’re an idiot!”

Echo Dot Alexa: Ok *starts playing Despacito*

Alejandro: 😦

Graves 😎

———

Ghost: What happens to the car if you press the break and the accelerator at the same time? Does it take a screenshot?

Price:

Soap:

Gaz:

Roach, wanting to be a little shit: Ye-

Sherlock being done with life: No. That’s it, I’m driving.

———

Soap: Go to bed! It’s 3am. If you don’t you’re going to hate yourself in the morning!

Roach: Jokes on you, I’m gonna hate myself in the morning ✨REGARDLESS✨

———

Sherlock: I don’t want to be a person anymore.

Ghost: … What?

Sherlock: I’m tired of it.

Soap: 😥 Maybe we should talk about this-

Sherlock: I just wanna be a dinosaur.

Ghost:

Soap:

Roach: Me too!

———

*Sherlock walks into the rec room and drops her bag on the floor*

Sherlock: tEll mE wHy tHerE arE 7 BiLlioN peOplE On tHiS DAmN PlaNEt ANd NoT 1 pErsOn hAs A CrUsH On mE!? WhAt ThE HelL UNiveRsE?!!

Gaz, whose been pining for her since the day he met her: what about me 🥺

———

Roach, sleep deprived: All I want-

Soap: Oh no

Roach: -is for for someone to walk up to me-

Ghost: What’s going on now?

Roach: -look me in the eyes, put their hands on my face, and very passionately-

Gaz: Kiss you?

Roach: -twist as hard as they can and put me out of my fucking misery!

Price: Roach no

Roach: Roach yes

———

Laswell: John, aren’t you supposed to be on a Zoom call right now?

Price: I got kicked off already.

Laswell: Why! What did you do?!

Price: Well she said, “DoN’t GeT sMaRt WiTh Me!” and I said, “Then what are we paying you for?” and she did not like that!

Laswell: John that’s rude.

Price: …But I’m right on this.

———

Roach: Remember when you guys told me to go to the pharmacy?

Sherlock: *looks at Gaz before looking at Roach* Yess

Roach: Mmm they’re out of my ADHD medication for five days.

Sherlock: Oh my god-

Roach: It’s gonna be a fun week!

Gaz, already leaving the room: I’m going to my mother’s-

Sherlock, pissed that she would have to watch Roach by herself: What happened to “in sickness and in health”, motherfucker!?

———

Sherlock: I’m sorry guys… there’s nothing else we can do. Graves is dying, we’re gonna have to pull the plug.

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: Oh my god… Oh my god…

Soap: Can I do it?

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: What?

Soap: Can I pull the plug?

Gaz: Hey no! I wanna pull the plug!

Ghost: No fuck you! I get to do it!

Soap: This is bullshit! I wanna do it!

Price: NO! I-I’m the oldest, I should be the one to do it!

Ghost: I’ll thumb wrestle you for it.

Price: Fine, let’s go BITCHHH

Price & Ghost, hands together for thumb wrestling: 1, 2, 3, 4, I declare a thumb war!

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: Are you two serious?!

Price: YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE A CHANCE

Ghost: OH, YOU’RE GOING DOWN

Price: NOOO, NO, NO, NOO

Ghost: OHHHHHHHHHH

*Ghost wins*

Ghost: Yess

Price: NO

Ghost: yEsSSSSS

Price: DAMN IT

Ghost: Alright, where’s that plug?!

Soap: Where’s that plug?

Ghost: Where’s that mother fucking plug?!

Sherlock: Do you have ANY respecT?!

Ghost: No, I have 0 respect!

Soap: We have 0.

Price: We have 0 respect.

Gaz: I have nothing!

Gen. Herschel Shepherd: I can’t even believe this!

Sherlock: Yeah, me too. Alright let’s get this show on the road! I got some leftover lasagna at home, and it’s got my name on it!

———

Ghost: Good morning, everyone. God has let me live another day. And I’m about to make it EVERYONE’S problem.

Soap: Good morning to you too.

Price: 🤦‍♂️ I give up.

———

Alex: What do we do when we’re feeling sad?

Farah: Watch a murder documentary and plan out how to do it without getting caught?

Hadir’s soul in Hell: *scared shitless despite already being dead*

Alex: Jesus fuck, NO!

———

Soap: You guys won’t believe what just happened!

Ghost: What happened?

Soap: Some guy from Shadow Company wouldn’t leave Sherlock alone-

Nikolai, maternal uncle instincts kicking in: Excuse me!

Soap: -but she took care of it!

Price, to Sherlock: How’d you take care of it?

Sherlock: Simple. *clears throat* 🎶Row row row your boat, The fuck away from me, Felony felony just tried to test me, And I’m a cause a scene🎶

Nikolai, laughing: That’s my girl!

[womanofwords]

Teacher's Pest

"Class, I regret to inform you that I must leave for an indefinite amount of time for medical reasons," Miss Bones said.

"What?!" Randall gasped, tears in his eyes already threatening to leave.

"I was worried about that, too." She looked . . . solemn. "Luckily, I have hand-picked a replacement long in advance to get you the teacher you need. He is exactly what you all need."

"How?" Randall asked. Miss Bones smiled.

"Let's just say he has a real way with problem students," she said. "Behave for him, OK?"

The rest of the class gulped. This teacher sounded ominous. Randall giggled audibly. "Finally, someone to keep the worst kids in line!"

"Miss Bones sounded . . . sinister. Who is this guy?" Amy wondered.

"Someone that can punish everybody," Randall gleefully informed. "What this class needs."

"You're trying to be the teacher's pet for the new teacher already, and they're not even here!" Amy threw her hands up and left the room.

No matter who the teacher was, Randall was always the same.

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

Randall eagerly awaited the new teacher's arrival. If Miss Bones were to recommend them, they were probably just as sweet and kind as her. Maybe they were a rookie, someone who would eagerly agree to punish troublemakers and thank him for giving reminders about the homework.

The new teacher did not seem new at all.

"Good morning, class. My name is Mr Kilgrave," the teacher said. "I heard from Miss Bones that this was going to be a difficult class to teach. Disruptive influences, derailing the lesson, talking back. None of the other teachers want to touch your class with a barge pole. So, they had to bring in me."

"It's her!" Randall immediately pointed a literal finger at Amy. "There's your bad influence! Just wait till I tell you about all the stuff they've done!"

"Did I ask for your input?" Mr Kilgrave asked. "What's your name, boy?"

Randall gulped. "Randall."

Mr Kilgrave smiled. His mouth seemed to have too many teeth, more than a person needed. "Ah, the famous Randall. Miss Bones mentioned you when we talked."

"Really?"

"Yes." Mr Kilgrave grimaced, like he was constipated. "Most of the disruptions in her class were from you, apparently."

"That is not true!" Randall spluttered. "There has to be a mistake!"

"She said you'd say that. Needless to say, I'll be keeping an eye on you." Mr Kilgrave gave Randall the sort of stare that could have made a raging bull stop in its tracks. "You will not like me having an eye on you."

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

Randall groaned as he massaged his hand. "Mr Kilgrave is the worst teacher," he groaned. "He made my homework writing lines. And the line was 'I must be civil to my classmates' 150 times."

"Really? I thought he was pretty fair," Amy said.

"You think he's fair? Of course you do! You hate me!" Randall ranted. "Miss Bones made a horrible mistake and mixed my name up with yours in her report of the class and now I have to deal with your horrible reputation and a sadistic teacher!"

"Randall, you shouldn't be saying things like that," Amy said, as Mr Kilgrave entered behind Randall's back.

"You can't tell me what to do or what to think! Mr Kilgrave is evil and clearly incompetent!" Randall shrieked.

"Good to know you're still thinking of me, Randall," Mr Kilgrave said. The boy let out a feeble squeak and hid behind Amy. "Don't hide behind Amy now. Come out here."

"This is all her fault," Randall hissed. "She provoked me."

"All I said was that you were a fair teacher," Amy said.

"And that provoked me!" Randall yelled.

"Do you need another detention, Randall?" Mr Kilgrave asked.

"N-no," Randall meekly replied.

Amy smiled. Mr Kilgrave was going to be interesting.

[incorrectjane-andthedragon]

Jane: Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to lead my kinsmen to glory on the battlefield.

[officermaddie23]

Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Original Work Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Original Characters Additional Tags: Human Experimentation, Swearing, PTSD Summary:

While a wolfman named Fredrick is taking a walk through the woods he encounters a little girl on the run from mad scientists he decides to help her despite the risks his own life might have for this

If you guys remember that video I shared then let me tell you it inspired me to write this 

[nasa]

Our newest class of astronaut candidates graduated on March 5, 2024. This means they’re now eligible for spaceflight assignments to the International Space Station, the Moon, and beyond! In the next twelve posts, we’ll introduce these new astronauts.

Do you want to be a NASA astronaut? Applications are now open.

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space!

[leenaavan-art]

Hello everyone! I wanted to share with you my art projects I've worked on for March 😊

They are all inspired by YouTube channels, Tatyworks and Siakula, except for one and that's the one with the strawberries, jellyfish, mushrooms and a cherry blossom tree... that one was my idea due to boredom

I hope you all like them ❤️

⚠️ Please do not edit and repost.. Likes and reblogs are always appreciated ⚠️

[turtletoria]

i wanted to try drawing older Mabel and Dipper !

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC Places To Sleep

I've seen many fics and prompts with Homeless Danny, and I've just had a thought: what's the safest place to sleep at night when you a) don't have a home, b) can turn intangible and invisible, and c) are not afraid of mortals' justice system since you're dead and it doesn't really apply to you?

Cop cars.

Cops patrol the streets at night, but really, they mostly just pick a place and stay there until something happens, right? (I mean, I think that's right, I'm not very educated on the matter)

So, say Danny is in Gotham, and he needs a place to sleep, but it's the most crime-ridden city in the world, and sleeping out in the streets is cold and uncomfortable. And sure, he can climb into any car, but he chooses the cop car because, first, it's got a radio, so if the cops get any alerts about him (you can't tell me that GIW wouldn't use the help of local police, they are government agents after all), he will hear it first. Second, it's warm and cozy and soft. Third, and the most important: no one is going to look for him there! It's like hiding in plain sight but even better.

Or, well, it is, until one night the cop car he is sleeping in gets dispatched to some crime scene along with about a dozen others, and it turns out to be some trafficking rink that got busted or whatnot, and there are a lot of people who need to be taken to the GCPD station. So Danny, sleepy and grumpy because he was suddenly woken up, searches for the first still running but empty car, while staying invisible and intangible, and when he finds it, he just crashes in the back seat.

He is very surprised a few minutes later when the motherfucking Batman jumps in the front seat, and at least three of his sidekicks are trying to squeeze themselves in the back.

The Bats are even more surprised when they find a random teenager flickering in and out of visibility in the back seat of Batmobile, his eyes wide as saucers and Lazarus green.

[haikuku]

Haikuku, no. 371

Driving around from campsite to campsite, living the nomadic life....

--haikuku

[doctormori]

I love this book to death, so here's some things I noticed <3

[tourettesdog]

I am begging people to be normal about completed fics, and in particular one shots.

I am begging people to stop demanding more from authors, and insisting that one shots need to be longer or have sequels.

I don't think yall understand how many fanfic authors are one more "where's the rest of it?" comment away from throwing out any plans they might have had to continue an idea.

Unless an author like specifically says they might write more for an idea, just-- assume something marked as completed is complete, and respect it as it stands, please.

[mayflora-18]

Incorrect CoD Quotes #5

Sherlock: *gets stabbed*

Sherlock: Oh, look at that.

Sherlock: I’ve been impaled.

Nikolai: 😱

———

Nikolai, singing: I have loved you since we were 18.

Price: We met when we were, like, 23.

Nikolai: …

Nikolai, singing: I’ve been stalking you since I was 18!

———

Ghost: You have exactly three seconds to explain why you just woke me up.

Price: Because it’s morning and you should be awake.

Ghost: Oh… Interesting… I didn’t know you wanted to die today!

Price: Simon, you can’t kill me.

Ghost: It’s too late, I’ve already decided how.

———

Sherlock: I really like Eminem.

Soap: I prefer Skittles.

Sherlock: No like the rapper-

Soap: WHY WOULD YOU EAT THE WRAPPER?!!?

———

Sherlock: I have never seen two stable best friends. Always one of them has to lose their shit.

*Ghost and Soap look at each other*

Ghost: Wait, you’re telling me one of us is actually supposed to be stable!?

Soap: Ah, shite!

———

Soap: Who did you look up to most as a child and why?

Gaz: Uh, my parents because they were taller than me.

———

Soap: There are 1 million 13 thousand 150 words in the ENTIRE English Dialect and yet there is not a single combination of them that describes my URGE to HIT you WITH A CHAIR!

Graves: *pissed off*

*Soap pulls out a black umbrella from who knows where and opens it in front of Graves, showing him a hand that was giving him the middle finger*

———

Laswell: What was Plan A?

Ghost: Don’t fuck up.

Price: And what was Plan B?

Soap: Don’t fuck up Plan A.

Price: And what did you guys do?

Gaz: Fucked up p-

Sherlock: You fucked up Plan A.

———

Rudy: Ale, get out of the house. Valeria is here!

Alejandro: Well, tell Valeria to hold up because I’m doing some important shit.

*Alejandro starts playing music*

Alejandro’s phone: “You used to call me on my cell phone”~

Valeria: What the fuck?

———

General Shepherd: If you don’t like me at my worst, then you don’t like me at my best.

Price, holding a gun to Shepherd’s head: I don’t like you at all!

———

Sherlock: In every group of friends, there is the dumb one.

*Ghost looks at Soap*

Soap: Really

———

Laswell: When did you get here?

Price: I spent the night.

Laswell: …But I remember you leaving before I went to bed. You said “Good night, I’m going home!” And then you left.

Price: Yeah, but then on my way out I tripped and fell down the stairs.

Laswell: Oh my god, were you hurt?

Price: Nah, I just didn’t feel like getting up.

———

*at 7am*

Sherlock: Why is Gaz running?

Sherlock, yelling: Are you ok!? Is somebody chasing you!?

Gaz, yelling back: I’m running on purpose!

Sherlock: You’re running on purpose? It’s 7 in the morning!

———

Ghost: ArE yOu ReAdY tO DiE????

Sherlock: No??

Ghost: ThEn I’lL cOmE bAcK lAtEr!

———

Soap, slurring: You do realize that humans were really supposed to be on this earth to eat fruit-

Price: Is he drinking?

Soap: -in the wilderness butt naked-

Nikolai: I love it when he’s like this.

Soap: -and fuck, right?

Sherlock: He’s definitely drunk.

Soap: All this hard work shit is shit we brought ourselves.

———

Price: Where are you, Laswell? This place is fancy, and I don’t know which fork to kill myself with.

———

Soap, talking to Graves: Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?

Graves: …

Soap: No, a summer’s day is not a bitch.

———

*Sherlock walks outside with a coffee in her hand*

*She sees JTF Ghost Team fighting Shadow Company*

Sherlock: god it’s brutal out here *sips coffee*

Rudy: Aren’t you gonna help us?

Sherlock: uhmm no *walks back inside*

Soap, shaking his head: You had to ask.

Rudy: 😰 She is a psychopath!

———

Alejandro: Keep your eyes closed, I have a surprise!

Rudy: Did you do the dishes?

Alejandro: I said surprise, not miracle.

[glossc1]

little dionysus, son of glorious semele

[twigstick9]

pov you fell for a country singing dork

[hope-for-the-planet]

If you get caught up in the mindset of "we are doomed because most humans are too dumb and selfish to solve climate change" I really encourage you to watch the first 12 minutes of this video.

I've also done my best to condense the most relevant quotes below.

"The biggest reason why we have a problem, is love. It's that we want to have children, we want them to survive, and so now there are 8 billion of us. And now that there are 8 billion of us, we want all 8 billion of those people to have pretty good lives." "[P]eople are so caught up in [...] the current moment, that you can't see how hard all of our ancestors worked to provide us with a world that has plenty of food [...], climate controlled shelter, and pretty easy transportation to anywhere within [...] 400 miles." "Humans are remarkable. We are very powerful. Give any species this level of power and they will provide opportunities for thriving for themselves and for their children. They will try and prevent their children from dying.[...] For the most part they will walk through fire to make sure that their children don't die. They will destroy the Earth to make sure their children won't die." "I don't want my son growing up thinking that the species that he's a part of is in some way evil. I feel like that's the root of a lot of [...] arm chair environmentalism. I want him thinking, humans are problem-solvers and solving problems creates new problems." "When we solve the global warming problem, we will have created new problems. And we're doing it right now. Renewable technologies use way more land [...], they impact the environment by being there [...]. And I think in the future we will uninstall a bunch of those things because we'll have other technologies that are better [...]. And the people in the future will be mad at us for the work that we did and that's fine. Just like we're kinda mad at all the people who made the world a better place by burning a bunch of coal so that we could have refrigerators [...]."

You can't hate yourself and your fellow humans into saving the world--and if you believe that all other humans are short sighted and selfish and doomed by their very nature then you are far more vulnerable to doomerism and hopelessness and giving up.

As Hank says in the video, the only reason we even know that climate change is a problem at all is because a lot of very intelligent humans were concerned about the possible impacts of fossil fuels on the future and did a whole lot of modeling and research so they could warn future humans about the risks. And we are primarily in this climate change situation in the first place because our ancestors wanted to use the readily available energy from fossil fuels to give their children and their communities better, safer, healthier lives.

Now we are trying to use brains that evolved primarily to deal with relatively little, immediate, tangible problems in small communities to solve a very large, long-term, largely intangible problem on a global scale. As frustrated as I am that we aren't solving this problem faster (and that there is small number of greedy fossil fuel executives trying to stop us from solving it for personal gain), most people are doing their best under very challenging circumstances.

Humans are driven to solve problems for the love of other humans--themselves, their families, their communities, humanity as a whole. We shouldn't base the drive to solve our current problems on disdain for ourselves and our fellow humans.

[nasa]

What We Learned from Flying a Helicopter on Mars

The Ingenuity Mars Helicopter made history – not only as the first aircraft to perform powered, controlled flight on another world – but also for exceeding expectations, pushing the limits, and setting the stage for future NASA aerial exploration of other worlds.

Built as a technology demonstration designed to perform up to five experimental test flights over 30 days, Ingenuity performed flight operations from the Martian surface for almost three years. The helicopter ended its mission on Jan. 25, 2024, after sustaining damage to its rotor blades during its 72nd flight.

So, what did we learn from this small but mighty helicopter?

We can fly rotorcraft in the thin atmosphere of other planets.

Ingenuity proved that powered, controlled flight is possible on other worlds when it took to the Martian skies for the first time on April 19, 2021.

Flying on planets like Mars is no easy feat: The Red Planet has a significantly lower gravity – one-third that of Earth’s – and an extremely thin atmosphere, with only 1% the pressure at the surface compared to our planet. This means there are relatively few air molecules with which Ingenuity’s two 4-foot-wide (1.2-meter-wide) rotor blades can interact to achieve flight.

Ingenuity performed several flights dedicated to understanding key aerodynamic effects and how they interact with the structure and control system of the helicopter, providing us with a treasure-trove of data on how aircraft fly in the Martian atmosphere.

Now, we can use this knowledge to directly improve performance and reduce risk on future planetary aerial vehicles.

Creative solutions and “ingenuity” kept the helicopter flying longer than expected.

Over an extended mission that lasted for almost 1,000 Martian days (more than 33 times longer than originally planned), Ingenuity was upgraded with the ability to autonomously choose landing sites in treacherous terrain, dealt with a dead sensor, dusted itself off after dust storms, operated from 48 different airfields, performed three emergency landings, and survived a frigid Martian winter.

Fun fact: To keep costs low, the helicopter contained many off-the-shelf-commercial parts from the smartphone industry - parts that had never been tested in deep space. Those parts also surpassed expectations, proving durable throughout Ingenuity’s extended mission, and can inform future budget-conscious hardware solutions.

There is value in adding an aerial dimension to interplanetary surface missions.

Ingenuity traveled to Mars on the belly of the Perseverance rover, which served as the communications relay for Ingenuity and, therefore, was its constant companion. The helicopter also proved itself a helpful scout to the rover.

After its initial five flights in 2021, Ingenuity transitioned to an “operations demonstration,” serving as Perseverance’s eyes in the sky as it scouted science targets, potential rover routes, and inaccessible features, while also capturing stereo images for digital elevation maps.

Airborne assets like Ingenuity unlock a new dimension of exploration on Mars that we did not yet have – providing more pixels per meter of resolution for imaging than an orbiter and exploring locations a rover cannot reach.

Tech demos can pay off big time.

Ingenuity was flown as a technology demonstration payload on the Mars 2020 mission, and was a high risk, high reward, low-cost endeavor that paid off big. The data collected by the helicopter will be analyzed for years to come and will benefit future Mars and other planetary missions.

Just as the Sojourner rover led to the MER-class (Spirit and Opportunity) rovers, and the MSL-class (Curiosity and Perseverance) rovers, the team believes Ingenuity’s success will lead to future fleets of aircraft at Mars.

In general, NASA’s Technology Demonstration Missions test and advance new technologies, and then transition those capabilities to NASA missions, industry, and other government agencies. Chosen technologies are thoroughly ground- and flight-tested in relevant operating environments — reducing risks to future flight missions, gaining operational heritage and continuing NASA’s long history as a technological leader.

You can fall in love with robots on another planet.

Following in the tracks of beloved Martian rovers, the Ingenuity Mars Helicopter built up a worldwide fanbase. The Ingenuity team and public awaited every single flight with anticipation, awe, humor, and hope.

Check out #ThanksIngenuity on social media to see what’s been said about the helicopter’s accomplishments.

Learn more about Ingenuity’s accomplishments here. And make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space!