#am i projecting a little? maybe

[rainbowcolored7]

I think we as a fandom forget how silly Benson is. The way he talks to Randy as they drive around? His inflections and physicality when he speaks? Benson is just a sweet little boy full of repressed trauma trying to bury his darkness with loud redirection. He walked the outer world with vigilant observation and silliness and kept his darkness to himself.

[beelzebubsis]

i’ve had the coolest idea for some bbh angst but i dont think it would actually happen cause its way too emotional and dark for bbh’s streams.

BUT

while we the audience know that wilbur was going to be bbh’s egg partner from his perceptive he truly believes that he was always going to be alone. that he was meant to be alone from the beginning and that he wasn't paired with anyone purposefully. from his perceptive EVERYONE but him ended up with at least someone OR were wanted by someone. when luzu came back he immediately went to find out if he was tilin’s parent and when wilbur came back he assumed the same, neither of them EVER even acknowledged that dapper could of potentially of been their kid, hell i don’t think wilbur even knowledge dapper’s existence. 

and isn't that incredible sad for bad? that he truly wasn't wanted by anyone. that no one even considered him an option for a partner, even quackity could of paired up with him when they both realised they were alone but instead quackity preferred to raise tilin alone, hoping wilbur or luzu came back. i know that bbh preferred being alone but knowing that he wasn't even an OPTION must be incredible heartbreaking. and now with the current storyline with forever and baghera not trusting him anymore, he really IS alone. technically has foolish but foolish has an entire family that he very openly loving and happy with whereas he jokes constantly that he hates and despises bbh AND foolishes character has made it clear he’ll do whatever to get the best advantage for himself (such as sucking up to federation for items). there's no one that cares about bbh when he doesn't provide them with some kind of use (from his perspective) even the people that visit his house visit to see dapper’s machines never for him.

so i’d really love to see a storyline of bbh spiralling because he believes that he isnt loved or cared about by anyone but also that he believes that he doesn't DESERVE to be loved, like the set up with the pairing system and now everyone grouping up without him would really make for an awesome storyline that doesn't interrupt the federation storyline. and with the argument with forever and baghera siding with him, it’ll be the perfect opportunity.

(i really like self deprecating characters and self destructive storylines if you cant tell, let me know ur thoughts) (side note i know that other characters really do care about bbh but im thinking more from what he's seen and heard and how certain events may warp his perspective on things)

[uponthebarricade]

i'm always delighted by an enjolras who is stupidly oblivious to his feelings but on the other hand please give me an enjolras who is painfully aware of them.

give me an enjolras who is acutely aware that he is different to the other amis, that he will never be able to express himself in the same ways that they do.

give me an enjolras who watches les amis drinking and joking around and smiles along passively, but always feels a pit in his stomach and a heavy weight on his shoulders, anticipating the rise of the revolution and knowing that their happiness could shatter at any moment.

give me an enjolras who knows he isn't a fun person to be around, who knows he seems distant and untouchable when there a million thoughts running through his head, who deflects concern and masks his fears with a stoic and prideful facade.

give me an enjolras who observes everything happening around him but never finds enough time to join in, who realises just how much of his youth he is missing out on but never gets the chance to grieve it.

give me an enjolras who dismisses marius not because he cannot comprehend the idea of romance, but because he is tired of everyone obsessing over something he knows he will never experience.

give me an enjolras who is acutely aware of his beauty and charisma and ability to manipulate others, who feels no guilt for using it to further their cause, but wonders if anyone ever sees the real him.

give me an enjolras who can't stop himself from ridiculing grantaire because he reminds him of himself on his worst days, when in the back of his mind his faith dares to falter and a tugging in his gut whispers of what is to come.

give me an enjolras who knows he can be cruel and terrifying, but who understands it is sometimes necessary to be terrible for the greater good.

give me an enjolras with so much to do, always in a state of go, go, go, who then stares at the ceiling in the middle of the night, unable to fall asleep when there is no longer anything to distract him from the fact that he is very, very scared.

give me an enjolras who at some point realises he is leading his friends to ruin, who is overcome by a staggering guilt for each and every of them, but who knows he has nothing to live for and everything to die for.

give me an enjolras who, for a split second, hand in hand, feels a kind of love for grantaire in his death that he had never felt for anyone or anything in his life.

[ningadudexx]

saving you from yourself 🫧

[eggsistential-breakdown]

Reincarnation Bluesverse + Will Wood lyrics

1.1 & 1.2 (couldn't decide which I liked better so have two of them) & 2

Fic: @reblogincarnation-blues's The Mirrored Heart chapter 1

Song: ... well, better than the alternative

3

Fic: @marypsue's What Friends Are For

Song: BlackBoxWarrior - OKULTRA

4 & 5

Fic: @marypsue's Something Borrowed, Something Blues chapter 17

Song: Mr. Capgras Encounters a Secondhand Vanity: Tulpamancer's Prosopagnosia/Pareidolia (As Direct Result of Trauma to the Fusiform Gyrus)

Kept these very fast and loose to try to break out of a creative slump. Based more off of vibes than silly trivial things like canon and facts and anatomy. None of these should be taken literally or metaphorically or physiologically or radiologically. Twice divorced gray eyesed Ian still lives rent free in my head sorry

[bilaudad]

thinking about this on my most recent rewatch

(gif source: ferndaphnia)

It can be kinda easy to get exasperated with Aziraphale sometimes for how much he’s struggling with what seem to us like really obvious moral non-dilemmas. How slowly and arduously he comes to the conclusion that Elspeth and other resurrectionists are meeting a need that polite society’s nonsensical arbitrary rules don’t yet have an answer for.

But this shot, this scene, just underlines to me how genuine and earnest his struggle is. He’s not being squeamish about graverobbing, like it offends his delicate sensibilities. He’s slowly unlearning some bullshit, and he comes by it honestly and is doing his best. He’s just learned that the contents of the glass jar in his hands are a tumor that was surgically removed from a 7 year old boy, who did not survive the ordeal. Look at his body language, look at his face (so much sorrow between those mutton chops!). If he were just squeamish, he would, idk, push the jar away from him, set it down, grimace. Not cradle it closer to his chest, as if it were the 7 year old boy he wishes he could comfort, as sadness and understanding washes over him.

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

The fact that Sir Ridley Scott said in an interview at the Alien: Romulus premiere that he doesn’t audition actors, he just decides he wants them in his films, and that he cast Paul Mescal in Gladiator II because he saw him in ‘Normal People’ implies that he must have seen Joseph Quinn on Stranger Things and Fred Hechinger in The White Lotus, and he then went “fuck yeah I want them in my film as demented twin emperors, get their agents on the phone” and honestly? That’s kind of iconic of all three of them, I won’t lie

[therealmilfdennys]

i think rhett abbott deserves a weird ass girlfriend guys. luna lovegood core type girlfriend. odd and intriguing and sweet. i think he would be SO confused but it's sort of.

"this is my deer skull collection, isn't it pretty :)"

*insert that pic of rhett in season two side eyeing the FUCK out of his dad*

"yeah sweet pea...s'..nice.."

i dont know. i feel like it could work.

[noramsblog]

Slip up

[raining-its-pouring]

Not a Pebbles hater not a Pebbles lover but a secret third thing.

What he did he did out of complete and utter desperation. There was no noble intent, there was no malice, there was just the need to get out. To break the cycle he was trapped in, damn the consequences. Of course he acted rashly when he thought he found the key to ascending. (Not dying, mind you, he wanted to use the state of death in the cycle to tap into ascension. He didn’t - necessarily - want to die, but it was, in his mind, one of the necessary steps for iterators to take if they wanted to ascend.)

To be clear, there was no evidence that it would work. Just the speculations of a bunch of desperate people trying to escape a thankless situation. And Pebbles was so desperate he was willing to gamble it all, including his and Moon’s wellbeing, on those speculations.

On a slightly different note I do think there’s a weird snobbery that people have ABOUT rain world weirdly? That there’s this idea that applying real world stuff like suicide and whatnot is stupid bc this world is intentionally alien. But while I think Ascension isn’t death, I think the ideology of both the Ancients and the Sliverists can be seriously read as an allegory for depression and suicide.

We don’t know what Ascension is. I think far too many people write off that it’s inherently bad, when no where in canon is that a given. But we don’t know if it’s inherently good either, that’s just a desperate hope of the Ancients and Five Pebbles. They hope that whatever the next step is, it won’t be the living hell they seem to be in here.

My interpretation is that it’s just another step. It can be whatever the individual (if there is still a sense of identity to retain,) makes of it, and that happiness isn’t an inherent factor of it, but neither is unhappiness.

And that’s where I think the allegory can apply really well. Five Pebbles and the Ancients (at least the ones who left the biggest impact behind) are deeply, deeply unhappy. And I’d argue for good reason - theoretical immortality sounds, in my opinion, awful.

But Five Pebbles is one of the youngest iterators we see. Moon is one of the oldest. She seems to be content with her situation. And perhaps this is her folly - and I’d argue it is, a little - but I’d also argue that Five Pebbles does not try many other alternatives (that we know of) before deciding the problem is this stage of the cycle itself. That it’s out of his hands, because this existence- this stage- must be an inherent unhappy one. From there it’s not the biggest leap to deciding that the answer is to force his way into the next one as soon as possible, without seeing if he can carve a space for himself in this one. And I think that’s a very real parallel to a lot of people with suicidal ideation.

I think it also has something interesting to say in that regard. There’s a lot of argument around depression and suicide, specifically around “if the situation is bad enough and there’s no end in sight, how much does ‘changing your thinking’ really help the situation?” To which there is near endless debate. And to which I think the iterators situation is an interesting (and deliberate) wrinkle in the allegory tying into that.

It’s just one reading of it, and I think there are many more. But my point is that there is a very real, very canon-based reading there. And I’d like it if people stopped acting like it’s a misrepresentation of the text.

[satorusluver]

Mello 100% has that fuckass bob to hide the fact that he has a big forehead. Change my mind.

[chiricat]

who is this guy

[whatsaudreythinkingabout]

I made this quick natrox fanart for you because you're right this is a great ship

ROTATES THIS IN MY MIND ROTATES THIS IN MY MIND ROTATES THIS IN MY MIND

but also this is LITERALLY their dynamic in my head you got it down to a T

we’ve already established that roxie is an absolutely shameless flirt around other girls but also she’s the epitome of “disaster lesbian” so i like to think she totally falls apart whenever a girl flirts back

so one day envy “the perfect woman” adams (they literally call her this in one of the books) comes along, hot off the heels of a breakup, and roxie decides “fuck it” & shoots her shot

and of course envy immediately goes into tall scary femdom mode (which let’s be real she’s pretty much always in) which of course results in roxie’s brain melting into sparkly rainbow jelly on the spot

(i have more detailed HCs about how they met & all that but that’s a story for a longer post, i WILL say that i HC that they both have the weak spot behind their knee…iykyk)

also your art is SO GOOD they look so pretty in your style 🥹

[wannabe-minion-of-chaos]

Don't mind me just

Smacks Gregory over the head with burnt out gifted kid syndrome™

[glacier-shrimp]

Done with our favorite Spider-Boy! Spiderling? Spider... What was his name again?

Avengers paper cutout 6/?

[rossary-of-the-rose]

A Spiral Leitner book which just looks like a normal maths textbook for teenagers but none of the equations make any sense. They look like they’d work out fine, and anyone but the owner of the book can solve them easily, but to the owner none of them work out correctly. Eventually the owner is driven mad because god fucking dammit none of these questions are answerable, they have an overdue assignment and they cannot for the life of them figure out where they’re going wrong.

To feed off of victims, the book replaces struggling kids normal maths books with itself. Eventually the book causes the owner to read every question wrong, not just the maths ones within its pages. The child’s grades have plummeted and all hope for their future have been lost.

Can also have some Eye elements ‘cause the student can feel all the other kids judging them when they get every single question wrong, even the really easy ones. Even the teachers are getting angry at them for not being able to do the most basic equations, and their parents are starting to act like their child has some sort of mental disability. This feeling of being judging and being thought of as inferior leads the owner of the book to detest all their peers and academics in general. They stop hanging out with their friends because they can see the way they smirk and roll their eyes when they get yet another thing wrong. They no longer do their homework or classwork, instead skipping school entirely, causing a rift to come between them and their parents as their parents attempt to force them to attend school but they always find a way to escape, and suddenly boom they’re completely isolated, bringing the Lonely into play, as the owner of the Leitner gives up on human contact entirely because why try when everyone will always think they’re a braindead failure?

Growing into adulthood, the owner’s already marked by three of Smirke’s Fourteen. Their life was over before it ever truly began.