#also if you read tags thank you for gifting this fic to me i’ll cherish it forever and ever <333 sometimes i think about it and wanna cry <3

[metagalacticx]

"Sometimes… Scott thinks about how soft and crushable and insignificant he is inside compared to everything else."

inspired by: When the Body Forgives by @theoceanismyinkwell

[noname-nonartist]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers ♡

Ooooo!!! Hi CC!!! ^w^/

Thank you so much for the asks!!!

Hmm okay! So 5 things that makes me genuinely happy…. Okay! Let’s go!!!

1. Project Sekai!

Atm, it’s my current hyperfixations! An Shiraishi and Mizuki Akiyama has my heart and soullll!!!

2. Drawing!

Whenever I have the energy (and if I ended up liking the drawing enough to post it lol), I do enjoy drawing a lot! It’s like. One of the only hobby I have since childhood tbh lol~

3. My Past Hyperfixations!

This would include Marigolds by Colbub, Persona 5, Baldur’s Gate 3, Jujutsu Kaisen, Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, Genshin Impact, Ace Attorney, One Piece, and Fire Emblem Awakening!

Of course there are a bunch of other things I got super hyperfixated about (heck, technically I always go back to Pokemon and Digimon since it was like my childhood), but these are the ones I remember being hyperfixated for monthsssss and so much so I would spend hours on ao3 reading fanfics of it!

(The expectation being marigolds since that’s technically an ao3 fic, A REALLY GOOD ONE, but I am in the discord server for that fic. :3c)

4. Cute Plushies (And I guess Merch of my Hyperfixations too lol)

Luckily I don’t really go on a spending spree… that often! (sometimes the AHDH impulse wins, don’t worry, my max is $150, and even then I don’t reach that limit, and I only do it at least every few months) O3O;

But I do occasionally enjoy getting a cute plushie at an arcade, in fact my bed has a good amount of them (mostly from my siblings winning them for me or giving it to me lol).

And now that I’m an adult (Oh god… I’m an adult), I do have a few Merch that I’ve bought! (A few of them were also gifts from friends and family)

The merch being about Jjk, Persona 5, Genshin Impact, Digimon, and Pokemon!

Watch me. I’ll soon get some for Project Sekai too!!! I just keep spending my Project Sekai indulgence savings on the costumes within the game lol. I’m responsible I swear!

5. Friends and Family!!!

I’ve been pretty lucky to have pretty good siblings. Of course, we didn’t always gotten along while growing up and we’re still not perfect, but I do really love them and really appreciate every thing they have done for me. :’3

And I really appreciate my friends too! Both online and in person too!!!

In person due to me being friends with them for so long, (and a few more recent ones too!) who I’ve always enjoyed being around with and makes my day better! ^w^/

And my online friends! While it’s some times hard for me to always DM them/interact with them due to real life stuff (sometimes I be reallly tired from work rippp X-X;), I always cherish our interactions and always wish you all the best days since you all deserve it!!!

Okay! That’s all now it’s time to tag! But since I’m super shy, I don’t wanna tag peeps who had reblogged my stuff. >x<;

So instead, I’ll just tag my online friends who had reblogged my posts in the past! That counts right? :Dc

Again, no pressure!!! ^w^/

@melodiclune (lol yep, ya count too~), @hxhhasmysoul, @himi-wiz, @tinyballerinadancer1, @sabrondabrainrot, @wrathofnature, @majycka, @olasketches, @thedemonreblogs, @blizzardream, @chocodajib

[wasabito]

thank you to @sparkexplosive and @vs-redemption for beta reading it for me! merry christmas & happy holidays everyone ♥️

➽ synopsis: being a member of the royal guard is a grueling and thankless job, so you decide to remind katsuki a little of what it’s like to be young again—what better way to do that than with some healthy competition.

➽ word count: 1.7k

➽ tags: fluff, budding romance, royalty au, childhood friends

➽ author’s note: i had a ton of fun participating in my first ever secret santa!! this is my gift-fic to the lovely @katsushimaa​ hope you enjoy, yssa!

"So, this is where the hell you've been hiding?"

His voice tore through the midday stillness like a blade, equal parts raspy and gruff. He sounded irritated and mildly fatigued. Not that Katsuki Bakugou would ever admit to being anything less than a hundred and ten percent. He climbed off his steed, heavy boots crunching under the weight of his feet, and secured his horse against the stump you were leaning on.

You flipped the page of your book, not sparing the man even a cursory glance. You would prefer to keep your attention occupied by fictitious worlds, warriors, and battles fought in the name of love and justice.

It was much easier to allow yourself to become the bearer of fictional hardships, because at least they could be solved through a well-constructed plot with each turn of a page, as opposed to the realities of your actual life, a slow spiraling disaster in comparison.

Bakugou stood in front of you, vein ticking on his throat with every clench of his jaw. His arms were crossed tight over his chest, red gaze pinned on your hunched form. He wasn't at all the kind of person anyone could easily ignore. His very presence demanded attention and drew eyes like a magnet.

Case in point, no matter how much you tried to ignore him, you simply couldn’t.

"Please tell me you aren't going to stand there the entire time. Take a hint will you." You went to turn another page, but Bakugou reached over and snatched the book from your hands with deft fingers and speed you couldn't hope to match.

"Give. It. Back."

"Nah, I don't think I will just yet." He sneered, thumbing through the pages. "I was told to bring your dumbass back to the estate, so that's exactly what the hell I'm 'bout to do."

You blew a puff of air from your lips, eyes blazing with a kind of defiance that only burned harder the more you glared at him. "Then I guess you'll just have to drag me back kicking and screaming."

Bakugou only smirked, teeth spread in a feral grin that sent a chill down your spine.

That had always been his intention.

Almost an hour later, you stood before your parents, clothes dusty, creased, and smudged from having been manhandled like a sack of flour before promptly dumped in front of your waiting audience.

A frown marred your delicate features as they began their lecture.

Your mind drifted elsewhere the more they reminded you of your lineage and that you were royalty and how it was imperative you behave as such. You’d heard it all before, known this for as long as you could remember. As the King and Queen of your home country, your parents never failed to emphasize the importance of keeping your every move in check because of the reputation you had to uphold.

Katsuki stood somewhere behind you, and although he stayed mostly silent, you could almost hear him grinding away at his molars. The King and Queen were taking turns subtly digging into him as well, implying that his incompetence was a stain upon the royal guard perfect record of achievements. If he couldn't keep you in line, what was the point of holding rank?

They annoyed him way more than they did you, but he dare not voice it, not if he wanted to keep his head attached to his shoulders. Far be it from him to send himself to the guillotine

You both were in for a long night.

“Honestly, this kind of behavior is unbecoming of someone of your status. What will our countrymen think if they see you roaming about unattended like a vagabond?” Your father stroked his beard as if waiting for a response. But everyone in the room knew he really just liked to hear himself talk.

He was no better than a machiavellian swindler in expensive robes. A puppet if you would.

The real leader of the land was your mother. After all, she had only married into the family, having been the daughter of a mere advisor with no royal blood. She spoke little, but her glare was more than enough to convey just what she was thinking.

By the end of the lecture, you felt like all of your energy had been sapped from you, but thankfully your parents left you to retreat into your bedroom for the remainder of the day. Bakugou escorted you, following close behind.

“You’re gonna do it again, aren’t ya?”

You paused, foot nearly catching against the carpeted floors of your bedroom. Fiddling with a piece of your hair, you shrugged. “...maybe.”

“You’re a huge idiot.” Bakugou shook his head with a low laugh.

A tiny smidgen of a grin danced on your lips as you considered him. He was your childhood friend. No one knew you better than he did. And he was also the guard most assigned to watch over you and keep you safe from harm.

Despite that, you’d come to notice how much he’d changed. He wasn’t the same Katsuki you grew up knowing and you missed him dearly. Occasions like this, where a part of his guard was let down, were becoming few and far between. There had to be something you could do.

“Let’s make a wager. If you can manage to find me, I’ll do one thing at your command.”

“Challenge accepted.” He reached into the folds of his uniform, pulled out your little novel, and slapped it right into your open palm. "No matter where you run off to, I'll find ya. Trust me on that, princess."

His eyes were like candles in the night, ignited by a spark of passion. Not a single lie could be detected.

"I won't make it easy on you, Katsuki, just so you know."

"Heh, you better not." He sniffed, tucking his hands into his uniform pockets. And with a final half-wave, he was gone.

In and around the capital city, winter had completely lost it's bite. The weather was tepid, swinging a mild breeze that coasted through the countryside. It was the sort of winter where one felt as if woolen clothing were worn more for comfort than necessity. In what should have been the chilliest part of the year, Bakugou found himself traversing one of the many beaches that hedged the southern peninsula.

After a full week following the challenge issued in your bedroom, Bakugou realized you were entirely too good at evading him or any of the other guards at the kingdom’s disposal, for that matter.

Day in and day out, he spent his shifts searching tirelessly for you, just to stumble upon you in the most random of places and only when you had wanted him to find you. The running score was six to five in your favor, but he was determined not to lose to you again.

And there you were, standing at the very edge of the shore, as if a mere thought had manifested you right before his very eyes. Your loose billowing dress of soft satin waved to him like a white flag of surrender in the air. He'd finally found you.

"Not gonna run off this time?"

"Nope! You won this round." Your cheeks creased in a smile.

Given the boots he'd worn, it was no surprise that his feet kept sinking into the sand. You said nothing as he toed off his shoes and socks, bare feet settling into the depths of warm, grainy sand.

He couldn’t help but feel more relaxed. Over the past few months, he’d found himself losing sight of his goals, caught in the dredges of the mundane and routine.

The cool waters lapped at both his and your feet, fizzing and bubbling, leaving behind traces of salt. You went further into the water’s touch, your back to him as the tides licked at the your calves. Even he had to admit, the view was a beautiful one, possibly even more so with you against the backdrop.

“I’m glad you found me,” you called over the cry of seagulls. “For a second, I was worried you’d lose this round.”

Bakugou rolled his eyes. “Tch, as if I’d ever lose to you, princess.”

“Naturally.” You laughed.

“What the hell are we doing out here anyway?”

He knelt to roll up his pants, a mere moment away from following after you like always.

“I... really just wanted to show you the view. Do you remember when we used to come down here as kids? Remember how we used to dare each other to see who could go the farthest into the ocean?”

Of course he remembered. Those were some of his most cherished memories of his time spent with you before duty to the kingdom took precedent.

You reached a hand out to him, an open invitation. “I just thought you needed a little reminder of what that was like.”

For some reason, Katsuki was determined not to meet your gaze, scowling at some point on the horizon, until you came over and nudged him with your elbow. “It wouldn’t kill you to admit that I’m right.”

With a sigh, he reached over and tugged you into a hug. You snuggled close to his chest, gripping the back on his uniform. It may have been your imagination but you could’ve sworn you felt the soft press of lips against your temple.

“Thanks... you know... for everything.”

Beaming, you leaned back to get the full view of his heated cheeks.

“Of course, of course.”

There was something earnest in his eyes that told you no matter how far you went, or however far you traveled, he’d always be a step behind you. It sent your heart hammering in your ribcage. You were suddenly all too aware of the way he held you secure against him like he would never let go.

“What are you thinking, princess?”

You blinked owlishly, taken over by your feelings and mumbling a hushed. “Oh, nothing.” The two of you were just a royal and a guard, bound to one another by duty.

If there could be anything more than that...well, only time would tell.

[kindahoping4forever]

This year I’ve spent more time with all of you than I have with my own family. This fandom isn’t always easy, this website isn’t always functional and this year was impossibly difficult for reasons both global and so personal I don’t want to get into. Under the cut, there are some people I want to individually mention but I know sometimes these posts are basically the equivalent of reading someone else’s yearbook messages so I wanted to give a blanket thank you up front. If you’re reading this, it doesn’t matter if we’ve talked or not, if you are on my blog, you made this year bearable for me. You helped this place feel like home, you helped me feel like I had support and as trivial as this whole thing is, you helped me feel like I had purpose in a year where I literally sat alone in my bedroom all day everyday. Yes, I wish 2020 had been different and god I hope 2021 is better but regardless of all that, I know I have a place here and that gives me more comfort than I could ever put into words (and by now, y’all know I love words). If you’re reading this, thank you.

To my anons, whether you were a regular (SAB and my 🍒 friend, I hope you’re well) or a just a passerby, whether you address me as Tater Tot, Main Crystal, Historian or an all caps MA’AM, whether you’re screaming at me about a fic, something Ash just posted or an interview from 3 years ago that you only have a vague recollection of but need to discuss - I’ve had an immeasurable amount of fun with you. Thank you for wanting to talk to me.

To the regulars in my inbox like @ivebeenasleepsolong , @fedorable-killjoys , @ashtcnirwin, @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @roarformeprettylion @spicycal @ashtonlftv and many others (some it won’t let me tag and some I haven’t seen around in a minute and the Tumblr folder in my email is only scrolling back so far on mobile smh) - I always appreciate seeing a familiar face (? you know what I mean lol) in my notifications and again, thank you for wanting to talk to me.

In that regard, even if we haven’t talked and you just like or reblog posts, I do notice the people who are consistently popping up in my notifications and appreciate your presence. I won’t shout you out in case you’re lurking on purpose (lol) but I just wanted to mention I value you in our little community.

@sadistmichael @sexgodashton @irwinkitten @suchalonelysunflower @mymindwide @justhereforcalum @oldmes @loveroflrh You’ve all been so generous and encouraging when it comes to my writing and I genuinely cherish every piece of feedback you’ve given me. 

Anyone who has read or supporting any of my fics this year, I can’t thank you enough. Before this year, I’d never publicly shared anything I’d written nor did I plan to. I haven’t worked since March and writing is now how I fill my days, I can’t imagine what I’d be doing without it so thank you for indulging me, encouraging me and occasionally screaming with me. 

@wastethen8 We talk more on other socials than we do here now lol. I'm always so happy to hear from you whether it's about something fandom related we're excited about, a tiktok trend (😁), a song you're learning (💙) or a silly story about your life. Sorry for occasionally ghosting you when I forget to check my snaps lmao. Love you!

@ashtonangst Our meals this year? Sometimes few and far between but ma'am we got fed. I'm so glad to be riding in the superior lane with you. 😌

@notinthesameguey Whether it’s another broke!sos comment, a simple “come get your mans” or something equally entertaining, I adore seeing you in my inbox. (Not to mention the reaction memes omg)

@rebelwith0utacause From discussing 2017!sos to tattoo/pierced!sos to dream cover songs to your contributions to the “Daddy but...” list, any day you grace my inbox is a fine one, Ana. (I still regularly think about that broke!sos essay you sent in lmao)

@ashtonsunshine There’s really only one way I can properly convey my love for you. 

Thank you for your presence in my life. (Yes I am saying this to both the picture and to you 😂💙)

@karajaynetoday If we’re being honest (like pizza), we have been through so much in such a short span of time lmao. Thank you for your friendship, your kind heart and the Aussie snacks. Here’s to being #GirlBosses in 2021. 😌

To my beloved clowns @cashtonasfuck, @pxrxmoore, @feliznavidaddycal Big sigh. Cream Soda. Collarbones. Paying for parking. Auralism. The Cologne Incident. Sprinkle Gate. Water bottles. The Hat Shelf. ****** ****. Our chaos? Unmatched (except perhaps by own Clown King himself). Can you believe there was a time when we thought Ash planting A GARDEN was going to be the most exciting gift he’d give us this year? AND THEN HE MADE AN ENTIRE ALBUM. This year has been unreal in ways both good and bad and I feel like the luckiest clown in the world that I got to experience it with you all. Full send on those vibes, my friends.

@cal-puddies I’m sure everyone on this website is sick of me talking about how much I love you (you might be too, who knows lmao). I’ll keep it brief since I’m sure I’ll tell you at least 5 other times tonight how much you mean to me. I am only making it out of 2020 in one piece because of you. The writing, the clowning, the bad movies, those have all sustained me this year but it’s the knowledge that I have someone unequivocally on my side, that I can talk to about anything at any time that gets me out of bed in the morning (and on the days when I simply can’t get out of bed, you tell me that’s ok and I am also immeasurably grateful for that). I am a better writer from working with you, I am a better person for knowing you. There’s no one I’d rather live in a Cashton AU with, plan to buy an overly ambitious farm with or otter-bond myself to as we float into the unknown waters of 2021. You’re the best bestie.

[sankyeom]

belle’s 2020 tumblr wrap up

i almost didn’t make one of these because i lost my laptop charger on my flight home to california and i didn’t want to type this out on my phone but after being tagged in so many people’s wonderful end-of-year messages (thank you @sunlightwoo​ @heartyyjeno​ @atbzkingdom​ @chaoticdeobi @xfirebenderx @fairyoftbz​ and for including me thus far 💗) i decided i had to join this beautiful love fest and end the year on a good note! 

m i l e s t o n e s  (personal and for the blog) ✨

◇ on february 17th 2020 i started stanning (and eventually ulting) the boyz!   ↳ this is important because i had been listening to the boyz’s music since no air era, but never watched their videos or learned the members’ names. after stanning the boyz, i was introduced to my beautiful deobiblr, which is such a warm and welcoming community. i met most of treasured mutuals through this community and honestly don’t know what i’d do without it!

◇ on april 23rd 2020 i reached 1,000 followers on my blog!     ↳ this was very special to me because i have previously reached 1k followers on many different platforms (quotev.com, wattpad, a different tumblr blog, etc.) but after not writing for a long time i was worried people wouldn’t like my writing anymore or that i wouldn’t be good at it after taking a break. reaching this number was surreal for me and it made me realise that i wanted to study creative writing in university, which i am now doing!

◇ on may 30th 2020 i graduated high school!   ↳ i graduated with honours and a 4.0 along with a lot of life-long friends that i had made in the two years i spent at my competitive, college-prep private school. i faced a lot of hardships but eventually got through it and i am a better person for it. congratulations to all the graduates who didn’t get the graduation they all dreamed of, you did something spectacular this year!

◇ on august 24th 2020 i started university as a creative writing major!   ↳ 2020 was a crazy year for everyone and it made picking which uni to go to really hard, but there was one uni in particular that loved my admissions essay and wrote to me personally saying they would love to have me in their creative writing program, which really touched me and interested me in this uni. i’ve always been someone who finds academics really important so i had gotten multiple scholarship offers from different “higher ranking” universities, but i was able to learn what was important to me in picking a school that would both foster my learning and make me feel at home.

◇ on september 21st 2020 i got my first ever B on a test!    ↳ and i was really happy about it. in high school i strived to get 100% on every test and would have panic attacks when i got even a single point off. i wish i was joking, but that’s the truth. i’ve always been a perfectionist and i wanted to have a more healthy relationship with my personal expectations in university. being in uni helped me to pace myself academically and learn to juggle doing fun things – like this lovely blog – alongside studying. i still managed to get all As in my final grades for this semester, but i really loved letting myself get Bs and take breaks. 

◇ on october 18th 2020 i reached 2,000 followers on my blog!   ↳ if you read how important reaching 1k to me was, you can probably guess how amazing and emotional this was for me. not only did i have enough followers to fill three of my high schools, but i had made a lot of friends at this point, and that was so special to me. i had also never done a special series to celebrate a milestone, and as i stand here on december 31st with 2,457 followers, i have yet to finish my 2k celebration due to taking a short break from writing. don’t worry though, it’s all coming very soon!

◇ on november 29th 2020 i reached 1,000 notes on a masterlist!  ↳ facade? was my first social media au masterlist to reach 1,000 notes and when that happened, it truly blew my mind. i have no words to describe how special that moment was for me. a lot of people loved it because they resonated with the main character or because they found all the plot twists fun, and i really love that so many people enjoyed it and gave it a chance, despite the general plot being quite common.

◇ on december 7th 2020 i reached 1,000 notes on a fic! ↳ he loves me, he loves me not was my first one shot/fic to reach 1,000 notes and my second fic ever to reach 1k notes, which was literally crazy. so many people have reached out to me about that fic and how much it resonated with them and their experiences, and i just loved that this was the first written fic i ever had reach 1k notes because of the emotional implications.

m u t u a l s 💛

i have so much love and appreciation for you all, it’s unreal. i’m a very shy, often times insecure, and quiet person so i have a hard time reaching out to people. this means that minimal interactions actually mean a lot to me, so please never think that i don’t love or support you guys just because i’m a little quiet. that being said, here are some mutuals who i have gotten to know better in 2020 and a little love letter for you each 💌

@xfirebenderx

💌 nani, you were one of my very first mutuals here on tumblr back when i ulted seventeen and literally never spoke to anyone or interacted with people other than the few anons in my inbox. you made me feel comfortable and welcome here on tumblr, and i’ve always seen you like an older sister figure because of that. your enthusiasm and support are often times unparalleled because you never hold back anything and i am in awe of how lovely you are. thank you for having my back this year and making me feel so supported! 🌟

@chaoticdeobi

💌 bea, you’re such a ray of sunshine and brightness in my life and on my dash, i’m in awe of how much of a social butterfly you are! you were one of the reasons i started writing for the boyz because i felt excited when i read your fics and i was extremely impressed with how immersive your writing was (and still is!). aside from your amazing writing abilities, you’re truly someone who i feel comfortable with even though we haven’t spoken that much privately, and you have an amazing gift of making people feel accepted and at home. thank you for being a wonderful brightness in my life this year! 🌼

@heartyyjeno

💌 alesha, i’ve said this to you many times before but i truly treasure you as a person and as a friend. you are without a doubt one of the most supportive and uplifting people that i’ve met on tumblr, and i can always rely on you to make me feel like i’m loved and a good writer, especially on days where i feel like i’m neither. i know that 2020 has been a struggle for you and i wish i could have done more to support you, so i hope you take this love letter as evidence of how loved you are and how much i cherish you as a person and as a friend. thank you for being my rock this year! 🌷

@httpsohnpouts

💌 rosie, you are someone who is very dear to me and i always feel so lucky to be your friend! we’ve spoken quite a bit this year and i loved getting to know you and finding out we stan/ult so many of the same groups! i loved gushing over dark haired eric, seunghoon from cix, and blackpink’s comebacks with you this year so much because it made me feel much closer to you! you’re always one of the first people i send love chains to on tumblr and i just really appreciate your lovely energy every time we interact. thank you for being a caring friend for me this year! 🌹

@stealerz

💌 qiu, first of all your url change is absolutely adorable and i’m a huge fan. second of all, your writing is so stunning and it was also another reason why i wanted to start writing for the boyz this year! you’re somebody who i often see on my dash and try to interact with, and it always feels a little surreal when you gush over my writing because i look up to you in that sense. you are such a lovely friend who i don’t talk to very often because i’m shy, but i feel like you’re always around to remind me that you support me and just make me feel loved here on tumblr. thank you for being an inspiration to me and sending me so many cheerful love chains on tumblr this year! 🌻

@neoskidz (i wasn’t sure which of your blogs to tag so i’ll add @chocolattees just in case)

💌 elsie, i always feel undeserving of your hype and excitement when you comment on my fics or leave me lovely asks in my inbox to sing my (absolutely undeserving) praises. you’re someone who seems very bright and warm-hearted so i always feel comfortable around you, and i only wish i could have praised you and given you as much love as you did for me in 2020. i love when you randomly pop up in my inbox and i love to hear about how you’re doing because i feel like it’s the least i can do to show you that i support you and am always interested to hear what you’re up to! thank you for reminding me that friends can come from anywhere and for always being so compassionate this year! 💐

@deobienthusiast

💌 k, i always look forward to when you reach the latest chapter of my social media fics because i’m always living to hear your reactions to them! i always feel so lucky that you interact with me and reach out so much because i’m shy and it makes it a lot easier for me to talk to you and actually get to know you. i love that we stan so many of the same groups and can always gush about cix and the boyz together, especially when we tag each other under any posts that have to do with blond baejin. you are honestly someone who i feel very relaxed with because we talk so often and have so many of the same interests, i really appreciate your presence in my life. thank you for being someone who i can talk to about my fics and all of our bias wreckers this year! 🌈

@atbzkingdom

💌 dee, i’ve said this before but you’re a literal ray of sunshine to me and you warm me up like the sun with all of our interactions. i always love to hear your comments about my fics because you never hold back and always unleash so much excitement onto me that i can’t help but reciprocate and allow myself to get super hype and happy. you have an ability to make me open up and actually feel excited about my friendships here on tumblr and my own writing, which can be really hard for me sometimes. i’m blessed that you look up to me and i have to say that i absolutely look up to you as well, in more ways than just your writing! thank you for being my personal hype-man and helping me come out of my shell this year! ✨

@lsangyeons

💌 yu, i think you are seriously so damn talented it’s actually unbelievable. not only are you an amazing writer but your designs, sketches and other amazing works of art are just so inspiring and i find it incredible that you’re so multifaceted. you’re always someone who i think very genuinely wants to know how i’m doing and is always ready to catch up and share what you’re working on with me, and i find that really illuminating and fun because you’re so talented. thank you for reaching out to me so often and making me feel comforted this year! ❄️

@fairyoftbz

💌 rosy, i am totally kicking myself right now for not reaching out as often as i wanted to because i feel like we get along well and we could be really close if i wasn’t so shy and bad at keeping up with my asks/mentions. i think you’re a lovely person and i’ve felt so fortunate to have gotten to know you better this year. as i mentioned before, you’re a very thoughtful person and i look forward to getting to know you better in 2021! thank you for being a supportive friend to me this year! 🪐

@sunlightwoo

💌 gina, i adore you, and that’s the absolute truth. i’ve been so happy that we were able to connect this year and become friends because you are a fiercely supportive and lovely mutual to have. i have to thank the kpop gods for getting you to start standing the boyz so we could meet and be friends after all this time. i love how you yell and gush about my fics because it makes me feel like i’m actually writing something people like and not just rubbish that i come up with in my head, and you make me feel grounded and supported, which i can only hope to reciprocate just as enthusiastically to you! thank you for being a fiercly kind and supportive friend to me this year! 🌠

here are some people who i haven’t interacted with much (because, like i’ve said, i’m terribly shy and don’t interact with people much in general (feel free to reach out though i would love to chat 🥺)) but still wanted to mention! i love and appreciate you all for replying to my posts, recommending my fics or just posting really amazing content here on tumblr for us all to enjoy, and that i’d love to get to know you better in 2021!! @1ovejisung​ @jenoleeaesthetic @thepixelelf​ @honeycobie​ @tbzwurld​ @meltingjukyu​ @mae-gi-writes​ if i’ve forgotten everyone i’m terribly sorry but also very jetlagged and bad at keeping track of my friends xx

a n o n s 🦋

i’m grateful to everyone who joined my anon list this year and i’ve genuinely enjoyed all of our interactions so much! i wanted to give a short thank you to a few specific anons but i also love my other anons, 🐝 anon, 🧸 anon, 💫 anon, 🦋 anon, 🥯 anon, 🍇 anon, 🌜 anon, 💒 anon, and 🦕 anon a lot and appreciate you all! thank you for joining my anon list and i hope we can continue to get to know each other in 2021!

🤍 anon 💌 you always check on me and ask me how i’m doing, and i feel so comfortable around you it’s like talking to a friend. we always talk about anything and everything and i appreciate that you’ve been such a constant in my life this year!

🌱 anon 💌 my sweet deobi 🌱 anon! i love gushing about the boyz and my social media fics with you, it’s always so fun to see how passionate you are and it’s honestly everything to me.

🐹 anon 💌 you really feel like a sibling or a friend to me because you’re always telling me to take care of myself and encouraging me to take breaks and be happy. i want everything that you encouraged me to do for you as well and i hope that you take care of yourself and stay healthy/safe!

🐱 anon 💌 literally the absolutely king/queen of getting involved in my fics and gushing to me about how every chapter made you feel. i love seeing your responses and i’m always so touched when you leave me simple messages telling me to have a good weekend or asking me to be your friend. we are absolutely, 100% friends my love!

🔮 anon 💌 you’re my most recent anon but i feel like we’ve known each other forever now! we talk quite often and i always love it when i see the little 🔮 emoji in my inbox because i love how enthusiastic and understanding you are. thank you for deciding to join my anon list so we could become closer!

f o l l o w e r s   a n d   r e a d e r s 💘

i doubt that all 2,457 of my followers are going to see this, but i’m going to write this as if you all will anyway. thank you for being here and for caring about my content enough to hit the follow button. numbers don’t mean much and are quite arbitrary, but i still think that it’s amazing that there are 2,457 of you cuties who put up with me. to those of you who don’t follow me but read my fics/like and reblog my posts, thank you. i personally see those things as small praises and/or appreciations for my efforts and i wish i could tag you all here to tell you that i love and appreciate you, but tumblr won’t let me and i think most of you wouldn’t want that either. i couldn’t make a love letter to the people that shaped my 2020 without addressing all of you, so i hope that some of you decided to give this a read. i appreciate you and i want you here, healthy, and safe on this planet. please take care of yourselves as i would love to take care of you. x

[barnesandco]

Ayesha’s 1k+ Writing Challenge!

Writing Challenge Submission Masterlist

Hey, everyone, I'm so happy to be back online - I think I was only gone for a week so that announcement was very extra of me - and to be introducing my first writing challenge! I'm so honored and flattered that so many people enjoy my work, and I'm incredibly grateful for your support since I joined this community. Tumblr is my greatest escape, and you've made it a very welcome and comforting one. 

A sense of community and friendship is particularly important in these trying times, and I extend my heartfelt prayers to everyone struggling right now. I'm here to listen if there's anything you need to say, and I'm sorry I can't do much more than be a metaphorical shoulder to cry on, and to offer this distraction as a brief reprieve from whatever you might be going through.

In order to present a gift of relief, and to share and create more stories of heroism - not that any of it can ever compare to the courage displayed by our health professionals and essential workers these days - and to honor and promote our collective of Marvel fanfic writers, I've decided to host a writing challenge. You don't have to follow me to participate - although that would be appreciated - you just need to follow the rules I've outlined under the cut. If you need clarification on anything, don't hesitate to ask! I hope you'll join, and I look forward to seeing what everyone comes up with. 

Rules:

Your fic can be about any character(s) from the Marvel Cinematic Universe. You can also include original characters that you create. If you want to write a romantic fic, I think it goes without saying that it shouldn't be underage (or having an excessive age gap), non/dub-con, incest, abuse, power imbalance/manipulation (e.g. employer x employee or teacher x student), etc. 

The sky’s the limit when it comes to the type or genre of the story, so let your imagination fly! You can write reader-inserts, pairings of pre-existing characters, OCs, or even just solo fics about the character you've chosen. I'm open to canon fics, AUs, fluff, smut, angst, romance, platonic fics, and whatever else you guys can dream up. (If you're writing smut, please let me know, as there are some additional guidelines I'm setting for that.) 

Word count is minimum 250 words, and anything above 500 words must have a keep reading tab. Multi-chapter fics will obviously be accepted - and with a lot of enthusiasm! - but please make a masterlist for any such series.

Kindly include any and all warnings that apply to your story.

The deadline for submission is the 31st of December, 2020.

Please tag me @barnesandco​ in the completed fic - and in every chapter of a series if you've chosen to write one - and also tag your work with #ayesha1kwritingchallenge. If I don't acknowledge that I’ve seen your work within a week of you posting it, please DM me.

One entry is allowed per participant, and you can send in an ask or a DM to participate, in which you should mention the one prompt you would like to use and for which character(s) from the list below.

Prompts

Dialogue Prompts:

"You fell asleep on me." --Taken by @lancsnerd

"Screw you." --Taken by @need-a-fugue

"I've got this." --Taken by @filia-sapientiae​

"I'd never forgive myself for it." --Taken by @oreostars​

"I trust you." --Taken by @readerandcinephileingeneral

"Oh, I'm so offended." --Taken by @iamthe-shadow-on-the-wall​

"Who, me? I would never." --Taken by @kaunis-sielu

"I don’t want to hate her/him/them." --Taken by @suz-123

"I can't explain it, but loving her is just… easy." --Taken by @littledarlinwrites

"You're my everything." --Taken by @chrisevansdaddycap​

"Leave me alone." --Taken by @constantaking​

"That's disgusting." --Taken by @ruffalomakesmyday​

"What on God's green earth was that for?" --Taken by @sweetwritesx​

"Is that a threat?" --Taken by @glxy-otter​

"Promise. Please just- promise me." --Taken by @blue-like-barnes​

"Oh, I could kiss you right now, you brilliant, brilliant woman/man/person!" --Taken by @megthemewlingquim

"You know that'll never work on me." --Taken by @allaboardthereadingrailroad​

"I'd let you if you asked." --Taken by @wordywarriorwrites

"___, I swear to God, if you do that again, I'll feed you to Tony's stupid robot." --Taken by @nekoannie-chan

"You can't do this." + "Then I'll die trying."

"You're stronger than anyone I've ever known." --Taken by @companionjones

"How did I get here?" --Taken by @thestorydetective​

"Why are you smiling this wide this early in the morning?" --Taken by @tinymalscoffee​

"What's the worst that could happen?" --Taken by @phant0m-queen​

"I can't believe they haven't caught us yet." --Taken by @indyluckycharlie​

Song Prompts:

Watermelon Sugar - Harry Styles --Taken by @softpeachbarnes​

Finally//Beautiful Stranger - Halsey --Taken by @shield-agent78​

To Build a Home - The Cinematic Orchestra --Taken by @whistlingwillows​

Floating - Alina Baraz ft. Khalid --Taken by @chuuulip​

Summertime - Ella Fitzgerald

Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler

To Die For - Sam Smith --Taken by @hailhydra920​

I Scare Myself - Beth Crowley

Speechless - Dan + Shay --Taken by @captain-kelli​

Growing Pains - Alessia Cara

Levitating - Dua Lipa --Taken by @samingtonwilson​​

Ain't No Sunshine - Bill Withers --Taken by @mermaidxatxheart​

Human - Christina Perri

10 000 Hours - Ella Mai

Despacito - Luis Fonsi ft. Daddy Yankee

Let's Do It - Ella Fitzgerald --Taken by @smediumsmeatbae​

Honey - Raveena --Taken by @opalsandlace

Talk Too Much - COIN --Taken by @subtlebucky​

Put a Little Love on Me - Niall Horan --Taken by @buckysbest​

Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran

Meet Me on the Battlefield - SVRCINA

Centuries - Fall Out Boy

Titanium - David Guetta ft. Sia

Stay - Rihanna ft. Mikky Ekko --Taken by @jalapenobarnes-main​

Eyes Open - Taylor Swift --Taken by @helahades​

One-Line Prompts:

Recovery is tender, straining yellow-blue over his/her/their shoulders and delicate in the shadow of his/her/their smile. --Taken by @iced-capsicle

Laughter tastes like cotton candy. --Taken by @rogersumbra

" All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players; they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages." -As You Like It, William Shakespeare --Taken by @shakespeareanqueer​

How do you miss something you never had? --Taken by @shellbilee​

They're stuck, and it's all ___'s fault. --Taken by @buckybarney​

Gabe Jones' French skills come to good use. --Taken by @raindroptv​

Self-discovery is a path nobody likes taking, but sometimes, there is no other choice.

"Demons run when a good man goes to war." - Doctor Who, Steven Moffat --Taken by @harley-sunday​

Star-crossed lovers find a galaxy to take refuge in from the rest of the universe. --Taken by @sgtjbuccky​

The Second Law of Thermodynamics states that everything goes from order to disorder. --Taken by @alyxkbrl​​

One-Word Prompts:

Sacrilege

Bibliophile --Taken by @nacho-bucky​

Soldier --Taken by @writing-mermaid​

Chrysanthemum(s)

Schadenfreude

Deja Vu

Picasso

Self-Partnered

Petrichor --Taken by @redhairedfeistynerd​​

Serendipity --Taken by @xoxoeeveewritez​​

Momentum

Equilibrium

Entropy

Resplendent

Anemone(s)

Effervescence

Sweetheart

Absolute

Echo --Taken by @wintersoeldiers​​

Nefarious

Picture prompts:

1. Taken by @infj-slytherclaw​

2. Taken by @starrysebastians​

3. 

4. 

5. Taken by @corneliabarnes​

6. 

7. Taken by @bucky-smiles​

8. Taken by @monarchofallisurvey​

9. 

Special thanks to the following authors, who not only inspired and initiated my desire to write, but then encouraged me, supported my work, and were - and still are - tremendously helpful. Others in the following list I befriended later on, and I'm so grateful that I did, because they've helped transform my experience on this site, too. Point is, all of these people are so kind and amazing and marvellous beyond what words can describe. Thank you:

@samingtonwilson @suz-123 @nacho-bucky @evanstarff @tropicalcap @kentuckybarnes @buckyreaderrecs @mermaidxatxheart @corneliabarnes @buckyland​ @bucky-smiles​ @sebbytrash​ @jalapenobarnes​

And thank you of course to my wonderful, magical followers who comment and reblog my stories, and give me all the praise I do not deserve. Thank you for your kindness and your enthusiasm - I cherish it and do everything I can to earn it. Special mentions:

@readerandcinephileingeneral​ @notsomellowmushroom​ @sonjashuterbugjohnson​ @anjali750​ @severelytinyeagle​ @redhairedfeistynerd​ @parmisaanowl @starnight-charmer​ @alyxkbrl​

I'd like to conclude by saying that I debated whether or not to host this writing challenge now, in a time like this. I decided to do so in the end because I need it. Call me selfish, but I need a reprieve. I need to feel like this disaster that has us surrounded right now isn't all there is to the world. And if I've learnt anything from being on this platform, it's that you're very rarely alone. So I hope that this activity can provide some semblance of hope for others that feel the way I do, and if not, then at least a little escape.

So my last but not least thank you goes to everyone who participates in this challenge and thereby makes this shelter from the world's storm, a little stronger, a little safer, and a little warmer. 

I’m excited to see what everyone comes up with, and I look forward to making some new friends. Thank you all and good luck!

[mithranqueersmusings]

Starrison Week - Day 7 - Free Day

Rating: U

Summary: Olivia has a gift for Ringo.

Tags: One Shot, Angst

Pairing: George Harrison/Ringo Starr

AO3 link here / Fic masterlist here

It had been a couple of years since George's passing, but it never seemed to get any easier for Ringo, any mention of his name or fleeting thought in his mind brought back the pain that never truly wavered. The hardest thing about grieving for Ringo was that he never truly felt he had the privacy to deal with it, they'd always be somebody asking about George: when was the last time he saw him, if they'd been close all these years and if he missed him. That final question was the most insulting, because of course he missed George; he missed him with every fibre of his existence, as much as any person could miss another. Some days were easier than others of course, but there wasn't a day that went by without a thought of George passing into Ringo's mind.

Ringo knew today would already be a little harder, attending an event for something - who could keep track these days? - which Olivia would also be attending. Ringo loved Olivia, she was the best thing to ever happen to George there was no doubt about it; she was kind and intelligent, managing somehow to keep George grounded for so many years. Seeing her would've been a joy, but every time Ringo saw her he couldn't help but thinking about the missing person between them.

They'd always speak to one another at events like these, Ringo especially liked to see how Dhani was getting on, and this occasion was no different. As Ringo approached her, he realised immediately there was something off by the expression of her face: he'd seen it a few times before, but not for years by this point. She approached Ringo with a hug, her charming smile lighting up her face.

"How are you?" She asked in her thick American accent, pulling away from the hug but leaving her hands resting on his shoulders.

Ringo smiled back at her "Alright, and yourself?" There was always an unspoken sadness between them, but both of them recognised its presence.

"Fine, fine." Olivia moved her hands away and began rummaging into her bag "I've got something for you."

"Oh?" Ringo asked, they'd given each other gifts before of course, but never in person.

Olivia pulled out a folded piece of paper, then handed it to Ringo with a smile "I found it inside the piano bench, can you believe it?"

Ringo accepted the paper gently "What is it?"

"It'll make sense when you open it, I'd wait until you're back home, though." Olivia explained, ever sweet.

Ringo eyed her quizzically "If you say so, thanks for whatever it is."

"You can thank me later." She brushed her hand over his arm softly, her eyes looked tearful, then gave it a quick squeeze before heading off into the array of people.

Ringo stood there for a few moments not moving, just holding the piece of paper in his hands. There was nothing more tempting than to open something when someone tells you to wait, but Ringo wanted to respect Olivia's advice; furthermore, if it was anything to do with George, Ringo didn't want to risk becoming an emotional wreck in front of all these people. And so he carried on mingling and drinking while the event carried on as if he didn't have the desperate urge to leave immediately, luckily time didn't pass too slowly.

When Ringo finally got home, he fished the paper out of his pocket almost instantly, but still didn't open it until he'd gotten comfortable in his living room. Now that he was finally able to look at it, part of him didn't want to. What could it even be? Ringo fumbled with the edges of the paper, it was clearly old from the way the sides had crumbled together, which no doubt meant that it was something George had written a long time ago. Ringo let out a heavy sigh, guessing what the contents might be would only make him feel more anxious, so it was best just to take a look. Now unfolded, he could see the paper was scrawled in an always familiar handwriting: George's. Ringo felt a pain already in his chest from seeing the curls of the letters, it was moments like this that made him realise just what little aspects of George he missed. Ringo powered through the initial ache and read the first line, it seemed to be a title of sorts.

Hey Ringo

The pain exponentially grew from this point on. Ringo knew it was silly to read these words as if George was speaking to him now, somewhere beyond this world, but it was difficult not to, especially when it felt so calming.

Hey Ringo now I want you to know That without you my guitar plays far too slow

Ringo felt his face tightening, already a lump in his throat growing as he continued to read. A song written by George would've been enough of a struggle, one written to him was even worse, but a song written to him about their love for one another, their inability to be without one another, all only to be discovered long after George had passed, was near unbearable.

And Ringo let me say this to you I've heard no drummer who can play it quite like you

Ringo found himself reading the words aloud, he wasn't quite sure when he'd started. He only wished he'd be able to hear George sing them, Ringo always thought he had such a beautiful voice. It wasn't the first time George had reassured Ringo on his drumming ability, it was impossible to forget the sight of all the flowers George had filled the studio with when he'd 'quit' the band all those years ago.

Wait a minute Mr G. Stop flattering me My drums sound bare When your guitar's not there

Ringo let out a sad laugh, the kind you make when your brain registers the happiness before the pain. This wasn't a simple case of Ringo merely missing when they played together as The Beatles, the two of them had continued to play for years after that. George had written songs for Ringo across the years, he wondered why this one had never surfaced before.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey Let me hear you playing

When had George written this? There was no date in sight, and considering it'd been stored away in Friar Park it could've been from any time at all. Had George even remembered he'd written it? During their years as The Beatles, George already had a plethora of songs he'd written that were just waiting to be recorded - many of then which never were.

Hey Ringo there's one thing that I've not said I'll play my guitar with you till I drop dead

It was at this point that Ringo realised he'd started crying, a teardrop fell onto the aged paper and left a small mark which began to grow. He quickly dabbed his eyes, no matter how justified his emotions felt in that moment he couldn't let them ruin this now treasured piece. Even though these words were never written with the meaning they now had, Ringo couldn't help viewing them that way. All the little disputes they may have had in their whole lives of knowing one another, seemed to wash away with these words.

Well, G. it's really nice the things you say But when you drop, please fall the other way

Another pained laugh, and more tears. Classic George, always ending with a joke even in the most sincere of situations. Ringo couldn't stop the tears from falling this time, he had to move the paper away to avoid drenching it.

Despite his weeping, Ringo still had a smile on his face, it was far too bittersweet to commit to one emotion. It felt like a new message, despite it clearly being several years old, that George was still able to communicate his love in this way. If anyone would've been able to somehow communicate through the vast and aching separation of death, Ringo thought it would've been George.

He imagined all the different George's of his life writing this down: whether it was the young, rebellious boy from Hamburg, the mopheaded cynic, the wise hippie, the gentle gardener or the mature and loving father he'd watched him become. While it was beyond upsetting to have experienced the loss of George, such a beautiful light in everyone's lives, in that moment Ringo felt blessed to have known him at all; especially to have been so important to him that he felt he'd immortalise their friendship in a song. Even though George never got round to finishing or recording it, Ringo didn't care, he'd cherish these words for the rest of his life.

For certain there is sadness where there is death, but in the memory of those we love there is true happiness and beauty.

[recurring-polynya]

Fanfic Weekly Roundup 9/14/2020:

Okay, it’s been, like, 2 months since I did one of these, and I apologize for that, but also, August was like... really dry at the old fanfic well? And I’ve been working my ass off for the last three week (at... what, exactly, Polynya? It is hard to say) Anyway, here’s some fanfics that I liked. Hopefully, it won’t take another 2 months before we have another.

I think I missed this one when it first came out (otherwise, it would have made the last roundup... I write these by going back through my AO3 history), but The Bet, by @lethanwolf was really cute! It was by an author who doesn’t usually go for RenRuki, but wrote it for a friend, and I really respect stretching like that, and they did a great job!

I was here first by tasteoftheforbidden is a Byakuya/Soi Fon story and I cannot imagine why I clicked on it in the first place, but it was really cute??? Like, at first they are really grumpy, and then they are like, “ah, I respect what a grump you are” and then they eat snacks. It worked. I was delighted by it, perhaps you will be as well.

Here We Meet Again by @marlasinger93-blog is just getting started, but the first chapter is really, really cute! It’s a Rukia and Renji awkwardly reconnecting after the Soul Society Arc, which I will openly admit I have an endless appetite for. I helped translate it, and I hope there will be more eventually!

I feel like I mentioned Captivate, by before @kissedbynightshade, but I couldn’t find it, so I will mention it now! It’s a little bit high concept-- it’s a modern AU where Izuru has the power to jump back in time-- usually a few minutes-- to prevent tragedy from occurring. However, after Rangiku is killed, he jumps all the way back to his teenhood, where he has the possibility to prevent deaths of Renji, Momo, and Shuuhei. It’s not actually very hard to follow, and it is an amazing mood piece. Just really chewy, poetic, melancholy Izuru (who is trans in this story; it is just sort of slid in there very naturally and it works), with a heavy dose of mystery. It is, as they say, my jam.

Is it time for the @kazeshini-s section of the roundup? We have two this time!:

Personal Questions features Orihime digging into those burning questions about how shinigami function that we all want the answer to.

Cut a Deal (We’re All Gonna Die Anyway) is Advance Team Arc fic about Orihime going to Soul Society to train with Rukia and I admit I requested it and I don’t care it was SO GOOD. Features both Orihime & Renji bonding AND Orihime & Rukia bonding, what more could you ask for???

These two are not on AO3, but do not sleep on this one where Chad Makes Renji a Burrito or this Karakura Kids Cuddle Puddle.

time in a bottle by atlntyda is a fairly short, Orihime introspection piece, but I really liked it!

Somebody to Someone by @jkrobertson Excuse me, did someone say lieutenant friendship fic? This is my love language.

Squad 4's Pregnancy Guide for the Unwed Shinigami  by manonlechat is a very silly fic where Gin is a gremlin and Matsumoto is like “well, this might as well happen.” I got a good laugh out of it.

In Between Days by @spyder-m Renji birthday fic! Renji birthday fic! Renji reflects on 40 years worth of birthdays, with and without Rukia.

the one to someone by @shamelessllamapeanutthing After the Soul Society Arc, Rukia chews over who she wants to be and who she wants to be with. Ugh, I loved this one. Great character work on Rukia, and very good and sexy banter with Renji. I am extremely bad at writing sexual tension, and I am jealous of the chemistry here. (I am very good at two-halves-of-one-idiot, and I am thankful for that, but every once in a while, it would be nice...sigh)

Icy Summits by Chaotic Dreamer was a very cute story about Renji and Rukia going on a mission as lieutenants together, shortly after they start dating. What I liked about this, is that the tension of the story is based on them both trying to do what they think is best, and they talk it out in a really healthy way, and that shit clears my pores and whitens my teeth.

Anchor and Vulnerable by squeaker_deaker. Renruki family drabbles. Real, actual-100-words drabbles. I could never. How.

We all know how I feel about ByaRen fic-- I don’t care for the pairing very extremely specific reasons, but I like both characters so much that I will occasionally read one if I think the characterization is gonna be real good (shippers be doin’ characterization, I said it). Anyway, I saw the tags “scenery porn” and “samurai do samurai things” on Heart Tangled by Grizmelder (there is a grizmelder on Tumblr who I think might be the same person, but I am afraid to tag them in case they aren’t although I just followed them because as I was scrolling thru their blog, I found both Brendan Frasier content and the LOTR Volvo meme, so obvs they are cool and I really hope they don’t click on my blog and say “who is this anime weirdo?”). Anyway, look, if you are a Period Drama Slut like me, you gotta read this. Friends, I shipped it.  It’s an AU, of course, and it somehow manages to circumvent all my canon ByaRen hangups and I don’t know who I am any more. It’s just... costumes and hair and archery and poetry and longing and sexiness. The latest chapter was epistolary. Oh, right, there is actual porn in it also, you have been warned. (also period-accurate homophobia and suicide refs, it’s a pretty serious and heart-wrenching story)

I know I am always on here, shilling The Thin Red Line. The last few chapters were absolute fire, and it was absolutely the high point of my week when a new one went up. The author, who is A_Fine_Piece on AO3 and Crimson Bttrfly on ff.net, recently announced she is discontinuing it after she got some harsh comments, and also deleted her Tumblr. I am absolutely devastated by this. She wasn’t someone I knew super-well, but we responded to each other’s comments and I really liked her. This was actually the second time this week I heard about someone getting negative fanfic comments, and all I’ll say about that is, if you’re reading a fanfic and you hate everything about it, why don’t you give yourself the gift of closing the tab and not saying anything at all? I can’t even imagine what someone could criticize about this fic, it is so well-crafted and beautifully written. I am so, so mad about this. Please leave a kind comment for an author you love this week, if you can. Writing fanfic is pretty thankless compared to the amount of effort that goes into it, we gotta protect and cherish our authors (and artists, too, for that matter!). My poor, weak heart cannot take any more of my faves quitting.

[lavender-lotion]

3, 4, 16 (DON'T say cherik), 22, 28

oh my god i absolutely hate you for asking me these aha you’re my favourite person in the entire world 

3. What is the best fandom you’ve ever been involved in?

to date, it’s been X-Men (alt timeline movies, ofc) despite the rocky beginning I had. in this fandom I’ve learned so much about my own writing, and my writing style has grown SO greatly since I first joined and has taken shape into... well whatever the hell it is now, which is something I really like (most of the time)!

I fairly quickly created a small, tight circle of people I really enjoy being around in this fandom, and have since cultivated my own little fandom space that I really, really enjoy. it’s filled with people I love chatting with, people as open-minded as accepting as I am, and it’s a place that I strive to make feel welcoming for all who join, as well! I run an 18+ X-Men Alternative Timeline Movies focused discord, so if you’re interested, join us here! 

I am trying to branch back out into The Fandom a little more after feeling a type of way for some time, and I’m honestly enjoying that a lot too! it’s been interesting to follow some more folk, and I’m really happy to see my dash start to thicken up after being close to barren for so long. 

currently, I have a small group of close friends I care a great deal for (hi, Mid!) that has absolutely made this fandom into one of the best i’ve been involved in. 

4. Do you regret getting involved in any fandoms?

very very very simplified and slightly unture answer: no. every single bad experience has taught me something that I’ve carried into my other fandom experiences, just like life lmao, but for more of a meaty answer to this question: yes. 

so much yes. 

I have SO MUCH regret around teen wolf, actually, for so many different reasons, but I’ve also learned SO much. seeing a server ran in a way I Did Not Like has helped me better mod my own fandom spaces, and I am very anti-totalitarianism and am VERY against showing abject favouritism to specific members, while I also always try incredibly hard to ensure no one feels ignored. I was reminded of how finicky friendships are, and learned not to be the person who puts in the sole work to keep ‘em going (and how to recognize if I am) because... when you stop the friendship might stop, too. I learned NOT to hit on close friends, no matter how much I might want to, and I learned the importance of open, clear and precise communication in romantic endeavours, which was actually a very good life lesson because I’d never been in a situation that could teach me it before. I’ve learned, or, am LEARNING, not to let personal experiences with one-on-one relationships taint my view of a fandom—this one is hard, and is something I am trying very, very hard to work through as I’ve recently been hit with a very strong and very sudden wave of inspiration for teen wolf.

but like, with that all said, I still absolutely LOVE the teen wolf fandom and have had so many amazing amazing amazing experiences that I wouldn’t change for all the bad, and that the bad experiences are really localized to the ship-focused spaces I was in and the personal relationships that I had, NOT with the fandom as a whole which I am slowly dipping my toes back into! I learned so much about myself and my writing during my time in the fandom, and that is another thing I absolutely wouldn’t change for the world. I am over the moon that I’m writing here again, honestly, and the reception I’ve gotten has been SO insanely amazing. 

starker is another one I regret-but-don’t-totally-regret-because-I-learned-shit. starker taught me the importance of 18+ fan spaces, and showed me what can happen when people... aren’t careful. when mods are minors themselves. I learned that cross-generational nsfw spaces are a RED flag, and that they mean GET OUT, and that anyone who would willingly allow minors and adults to mingle over explicit content are people I Do Not Want To Be Around. I learned a lot about myself there on an interpersonal scale, and I found out a lot about my sexuality and kink preferences, too (which was a wild time). while I do very much enjoy the lessons I learned from being in the space I was in, I could do without some of the more negative things I witnessed, even if they taught me a lot. 

16. Are their any popular ships in your fandom which you dislike?

SINCE I CAN’T SAY CHERIK I’m going to have to dig a little deeper and talk about Sterek, lmao. I was really, really, really into Sterek starting around... 2014? I read... fuck tons. absolutely insane amounts of Sterek fic. and I wanna say... around 2015? maybe? there was a really popular trope in Sterek, wherein Derek would push Stiles away (by being mean, by pretending to date one of the Pack (usually Erica), by bullying him, by telling him the pack didn’t want him, etc, etc) so that he could... keep Stiles safe? it almost always went the same way. there is a threat no one told Stiles about, Derek did “what he had to do” to keep Stiles safe (i.e cutting him off from all his friends and massive, obvious crush) and then when Stiles got hurt, the pack would come to his rescue and save him (only after Stiles got a little beat up), and then Derek would care for him, or not leave his side, or check up on him, and Stiles would wonder why he cared after everything that had happened and... bam. Derek would admit his undying love. And Stiles would just like forgive him and they’d get together and be happily ever after as a pack and...

that was so damaging lmao??? I can’t even tell you how many fics fitting into this trope that I read, to the point where I was like... “wow Derek loves Stiles so much he’s such an amazing person for keeping him safe by pushing him away and making him feel isolated and alone and hated” BUT LIKE WHAT. WHAT. that’s horrible??? so so so horrible??? I am so fucking thankful it isn’t something I really saw too much of when I came back around to the fandom around 2017, but.... oh boy. for a ship that I considered an OTP and read like the entire tag of, I have VERY few sterek fics of substance (when compared to the rest of my teen wolf writing) and this is the reason why. 

this trope and it’s absolutely ludicrous popularity a few years ago really, really turned me off the ship. 

22. Is there anything you regret writing?

content-wise: no. very, very easy no. I don’t regret any of the pairings or kinks I’ve written & I don’t think I ever will (I’m very anti-shame, lmao. if you like it, flaunt it). 

but... I do regret some of the emotional labour I’ve put into works? the emotional attachment I have with certain fics, or genres, or pairings, and how I’ve tied them to a specific person or persons. like, I can’t write ageplay anymore, because of how strong the association of ageplay is to someone I cared for deeply and no longer have in my life (and even if I ever manage to write it in general, I’ll never be able to write Steter ageplay). I have 13k of a fic that was supposed to be a surprise gift to a close friend that I hadn’t heard from in... ages, to the point where I gave up on sending the occasional monthly-message. I have one thing I wrote for a dear friend (who never interacted with it) and now I can’t help but feel like the story is awful, despite not doing horrifically stat-wise.  

I write because I love it. I write for people I care about, because writing is a labour of love, and it’s a way I can show them how much I care for them, but... sometimes that bites me in the ass, I guess. 

I’m working on it, lol. 

28. If someone were to draw a piece of fanart for your story, which story would it be and what would the picture be of?

god okay there is NOTHING better than the idea of this. I’ve had a few mood boards made for me here and there, which are always SO loved and cherished and massively appreciated down to my BONES, but I don’t know if I’ve... ever really gotten fan art? I had someone make some really, really cool like... OG bit-moji type art of a couple of my fics, which is amazing and I have it on my phone still, and @hd-hale once drew me a GORGEOUS sheriff stilinski inspired by Daddies’R’Us, but to get FAN ART i would CRY lmao

right now, I think something from to love and be loved by you would feel really, really extra special because even at 6/17 chapters posted, it’s my longest work ever. what would it be a picture of?? hell if i fucking know but probably something that hasn’t happened yet, lmao

[certifiedceraunophile]

Hi! I’m your gifter for the Klaroline Gift Exchange! I wanted to check in and tell you my idea and see if I’m on the right track for your gift. I’m thinking about the following: Historical human AU - Caroline is the daughter of a powerful baron. Klaus is an artist under the patronage of Caroline’s father. Highlights: a dark secret, angst, multiple murders, betrayal and revenge. Also, some smut to to take the edge off. Does that sound ok?

Alrighty so first off, may I marry your brain?? Utterly serious, no joke. May I marry it?

I mean dude—

Are you kidding me?? This is bloody perfect, so fucking perfect. I mean I feel like you jumped into my brain and just frolicked around a bit and were like *picks overly biased tropes/tags my brain constantly screams about like picking flowers* and then weaved a Garland with all those flowers and put it around my damn neck. I mean Ik I haven’t read the fic yet, heck the fic isn’t even written out yet, but like if I saw this description in the summary or tags, I’d dive head first for the work.

Historical Human AU, with a class difference between Klaus and Caroline, scandalous baby. I mean I dig.

Klaus as the Artist under patronage, honestly why aren’t there more fics with Historic Artist!klaus, it fits in perfectly.

Caroline the wealthy daughter of the Baron, yes ma’am I believe you are taking this in the right direction, especially if I get to see this class difference between Klaus and Caroline turn their love forbidden-y or secretive.

Ok just tell me this, have you and I had a conversation like ever in my life? Do we know each other? Because anybody who has talked to me for even like two minutes knows that this, this right here “dark secret, angst, multiple murders, betrayals and revenge.” Is basically what my custom Pokemon’s aesthetic would look like. I mean is it perfect? Bloody yes. But I’ll still unpack all of it because I’m ✨extra✨ like that,

Dark secret; alright so here’s the thing, love love love fics when either Klaus or Caroline have a nice snug close-to-the-heart poisonously scandalous secret no one should know about, but, (yes there’s a but) if this is a secret either Klaus or Caroline are keeping from each other, and it’s the kind of secret that in a honest trusting relationship the other would know about it, because it’s important and crucial information, and yet one of them keeps the secret from the other for xyz reason, the person who was kept in the dark should please throw a MASSIVE fit about it, not silently uNdErStAnD why it’s was kept a secret, or accept that some secrets are best left secret, but like be really angry that the person wasn’t able to trust them, and be hurt about it, Am I making sense? I don’t think I am, basically what I’m saying is if KC are bluffing to each other make the truth hurt. Please Dont let the forgiveness be easy. Make my babies pay. 👉🏾👈🏾🥺

But if the secret is just something Klaus and Caroline are keeping from everyone else or everybody else is keeping from Klaroline, or is basically outside of Klaroline instead of between them, go crazy, hurt my babies don’t hurt my babies, totally up to you. But thank you for this dark detail, I shall cherish it with tender hands.

Angst;

Ok Hi have you met me?

If no then here’s your answer,

YES

No wait like

YES

Gimme gimme gimme.

But, yes again there’s a but, (I’m so so sorry if I’m being very picky and hard to please not my intention at all, I just want to make things clearer for you, but at the end of the day you have total creative control, so like go crazy for me, I will fully appreciate it.) But back to the point at hand, I love love love angst between KC, I adore it, i mean KC canon or otherwise are not a flowery sunshine fluff couple, they’ve got problems and issues and are far too alike and way too different to even logically be together without constantly stepping on each other’s toes, I usually like angst when one of em fucks up and there’s a lot of grovelling involved, or angst due to conflict in between them, or angst due to misunderstandings, but what I do not appreciate is the abusive nature/toxicity/hurtful nature of the conflict or angst creating action forgiven easily, or not being dealt with, basically I want the closure to the angst to be reasonable to both characters, and no one is being a pushover, the Klaus and Caroline dynamic is built upon calling each other out, not taking each other’s shit and zero tolerance for each other’s toxicity, so I would very very much appreciate that to be included here.

Betrayal and revenge;

I mean ma’am you are waltzing straight up my alley and owning it like a mafia mobster, when I say angst, I usually mean conflict and what other better way to bring in conflict than betrayals and revenge. Oh the blood and the lies and the schemes, 10/10 ik I will enjoy, but I’d just like to say, that if betrayal in any way means infidelity, I will not enjoy it, fics with cheating in between Klaus and Caroline are squick for me, so please take this into consideration, and lest I sound awfully repetitive, like I said if the betrayal and revenge (conflict) is between KC don’t let them go easy on one another. And if the revenge and betrayal is not in between KC and with outside forces, just know that I appreciate it bloody.

Multiple murders;

Ok so I’m confused, are these sad murders, like good characters who are close to Klaroline dying, or douchecanoe asshats being hacked to pieces good fucking riddance murders, because like I usually don’t appreciate the former, when I say angst it means conflict (I’m really really sorry if I failed to mention that in the original assignment that was stupid of me) and not pure grief, it leans towards anger and despise and remorse and hurt more so than just grief, grief is a pretty straightforward emotion, there’s less room to play around with unlike the others I’ve mentioned, so please take this into consideration. So like if you’re killing off characters, please let it be Damon or Stefan or one of the eight hundred other dipshits in the Tvd universe, and please leave my other precious babies alone.

Smut; here’s the thing, I am constantly horny, like no shame, smut is my go to stress relief, I will ways always always ENJOY some good plot with porn, and the plot here is good, so the porn is just delicious vanilla (or not, iykwim) icing on top. So please yes. *insert audio of a person being very very agreeable during sex* please do so, I am absolutely one hundred percent behind, over and under this idea.

Thank you so so much for reaching out to me, I think you are going in the perfectly right direction, continue further down this path and you will make it straight to my heart.

I am again so so sorry if I sound lazer specific and am not giving you enough room to work with or to allow your muse to wander, please know you can always break and make a few rules of your own, this at the end of the day entirely your work, and I don’t intend to take your creative control from you at all, all I ask is please be mindful of the things I feel squick about. Other than that, all I can say is I cannot for the life of me bloody wait for this baby to come out, I am jumpy up and down excited, and I am again so sorry if this is putting too much pressure on you, not my intention, but this is like my first gift exchange ever so I’m extra screamy, anywaysss long story short, thank you so much for doing this for me, again sorry for writing you a whole ass Drabble when probably all you expected was a binary yes or no in answer, but like to answer your question, is this ok? If you haven’t figured it out already

Ahem

✨ YES ✨

This is perfectly and exactly ok, I love it already and I can’t wait to fall in love with it more, please continue to send me asks regarding this if you want something clarified or if you can’t make sense of the chaotic monstrosity above, my inbox is always yours to blow up.

All the love and peace and writerly inspiration in the world being sent to you.

XX

Srishti ❤️❤️

[antihero-writings]

The Simplest Gifts Chapter 2: Bound by a Wish—Pandora Hearts Fic for Phmonth18 Week 4, Prompt 2: Wish (Full Chapter)

Fic Title: The Simplest Gifts

Fic Synopsis: Christmas may not be the happiest time for the Children of Misfortune, still, sometimes it’s the simplest things that can bring joy

Chapter Title: Bound By a Wish

Character Focus: Vincent

Chapter 2: 

“Close your eyes. Now...make a wish!”

“I just want you to have a good Christmas, Vince!” 

Gilbert, brushing off a place on the snowy cobblestones, sat down beside his brother, handing him a piece of the bread he had spent much of the evening trying to steal.

 He wore a smile, but his eyes were tired.

Do you really mean that, Gil?

There was a new cut on Gil’s leg since that morning, his raggedy cloak was even dirtier than before.

Vincent had learned to stop asking; Gil often lied and said the cuts and bruises meant nothing, or, if he told the truth, it just made Vincent feel bad.

He was so small, so young. They both were. To be this alone, this wanting. They didn’t deserve this.

Just because of his stupid red eye.

Vincent took the bread, brushing his hair over that curse.

He didn’t deserve this. 

His brother didn’t deserve this. 

It was clear he didn’t know it, but Gilbert’s words were like daggers to Vincent. Though he might have meant them to be encouraging, they dove straight for his heart.

I just want you to be happy.

I just want you to have a good Christmas.

Sharp pains straight for the beat.

Because, how could he? How could he have a good Christmas when they had nothing? When they could watch other kids ice skating, having snowball fights, eating candy canes, pressing their noses against shop windows, pointing at the toys and saying I want this for Christmas, Mommy!

Watch, and watch them go by. Never to join the games. No one to turn to who would buy them the things they wanted. No one to turn to. Not even a family, a nice fire to warm up by, or a Christmas dinner. They had to start asking for smaller, insignificant things—things they could actually receive.

They started asking for only each other's happiness.

And it was still too much to ask.

How could he be happy when he knew there was no way Gil could be?

I just want you to have a good Christmas, Vince.

Did he really mean that? 

Was that the only thing? No toys in the shop windows? Not even a decent meal? A bit of warmth from the cold?

Surely he didn’t.

How could his happiness be enough?

Because he, Vincent, was the only thing keeping Gil from a normal happy life. If he just left him he’d be able to find a home, a family. Without him, their parents probably wouldn’t have abandoned him. Gilbert would be having a nice Christmas, opening gifts, eating cookies, by a cozy fire. He could be one of those kids with the rosy cheeks, and the spoiled rotten hearts.

If it weren’t for me.

Vincent was Gilbert’s chain. Tethering him to the gutters, the harsh words, and even harsher world. Without him, the world would surely be soft and cushioned, not full of sharp edges.

But if Gilbert just broke the link, he could still have that life, if he just left him behind...

Please don’t leave me behind, Gil.

The stars were especially bright that night. Cold shining speckles in a navy coat of sky.

Maybe it was fitting. It was Christmas Eve after all. Maybe the stars were trying to tell them that hope was not lost, that light remained.

Or maybe they were just a bunch of stupid lights, too far away to grant them any warmth. 

He didn’t think he could ever find his way by them, by something so far from earth. Maybe they were just a bunch of shiny trinkets beneath someone else’s Christmas tree, candles on someone else’s mantle piece, and if he reached out to touch them they would turn to coal.

He saw that kind of light in his brother’s golden eyes too. Hope, keep going, we’ll make it through this, surrounded by the dark.

Which would win out in the end? The darkness of the light? Black or white? Navy or gold? The stars, or the spaces in between?

If Vincent reached out to touch his brother…would he ruin him too? 

“Something wrong, Vince?” 

Those eyes. Shimmering gold. Unending black.

Vincent clung to him all the same.

“Nothing, Nii-san! I’ll be happy this Christmas as long as you’re happy!”

“Okay....Open your eyes!”

As Jack pulled his hands from Vincent’s vision, the world was so bright it was almost blinding.

A Christmas tree—tall as 3 Jacks—was the centerpiece of the atrium, ascending alongside the staircase, to the ceiling. Tinsel spun and weaved its way around its boughs, and ornaments shimmered like sunlight on ocean waves. Presents littered the base, a little moat of jewels and dare he ask? 

“Are...are those for…us?” 

His voice was a tiny, shivering thing.

For, surely they weren’t. 

Surely after all this time those glittering boxes couldn’t be for the the children who had nothing, who had never been given a gift in their life. 

All that gold. 

Like the stars. Like Jack’s hair, and Gilbert’s eyes. Like Vincent’s eye—the one that wasn’t corrupted by the color red. 

A thing like him didn’t deserve gifts. They would surely rot beneath his gaze.

Although…red was there too. Many colored wrappings, holly berries, and ornaments…red and green, gold and silver. 

Why would they put red in the midst of all that gold? Why would they infect the lively green, the rich silver, with the violence of red?

Did they not know the nature of such a color?

Surely they weren’t for him, no. They would be for the servants before they were for him.

“Nope,” Jack grinned mischievously, “they’re alll for me!”

Glen rolled his eyes before wordlessly kneeling down to pick two up, handing one to each of the children.

To Vincent, the tag read.

And the other, To Gilbert.

Before he even opened it, Vincent’s hands started to shake, and he felt his eyes burning with tears.

For me?

Such a simple thing. Such a small question.

Such a big gesture.

How could he believe that?

Still, it was written there in pretty curly letters.

The other three turned to him, eyes wide.

How could they want to give him anything? How could any of them care so much as to give something of themselves away to him? How could he hold the piece he received, be careful, cherish it, never let it break? How did they know he wouldn’t just destroy it, like he did all the lives around him?

“What’s wrong Vince?” Gilbert’s worried voice cut in.

I just wish this could last forever.

"Earth to Vince!” 

“Ohh Sewer Rat~!” 

As Vincent looked up from his sort of trance, he saw his brother’s concerned face—older now, less small, less dirty and weak, but also he…smiled less, now, somehow. Then he shot a nasty look at the Hatter, (who smiled pleasantly), before silently reading the tag on the present in his hand.

To Vincent, Love Gilbert.

Even now, the question ran through his brain; Do you really mean that, Gil?

He glanced up at the room. At the assorted mix of people, from different dukedoms. He and Gilbert were standing in the doorway (Echo in the hallway behind him), like he didn’t quite belong, like he wouldn’t quite fit in with the rest of them, like his dash of red wouldn’t fit in with their own little golden world.

He’d come to give Gilbert his gift, and be on his way. That was all. He didn’t intend to stay.

And by the sharpness to the Hatter’s eye, and his brother’s embarrassed glances, he knew he wasn’t wanted.

He didn’t want to ruin his brother’s day. All that mattered was that Gilbert was happy, even if he wasn’t a part of that happiness.

Still, his brother had decided to give him a gift, despite how Vincent had set his expectations against the possibility, and his protests aloud.

After Gilbert insisted once more, Vincent pulled on the ribbon, opening the box.

A pile of cookies beamed at him. Decorated as snowmen, snowflakes, gingerbread men, and Christmas trees. Some of the decorations, however, were notably more well done than others.

“I made them for you” Gilbert, rubbed the back of his neck abashedly, “I hope you like them.”

“And we helped decorate them!” Alice called, and Oz nodded happily.

Ah, that explained the discrepancy.

Although…he didn’t think that Gilbert’s little posse even liked him, why would they help him decorate a present for him? They probably just thought it was a game or something.

In truth, he wanted them all to be from Gil…

“You can probably guess which one’s from me!” Break sang.

Vincent couldn’t see it, but he surmised he’d probably find a cookie hiding somewhere, decorated in messy red ink that said “die, Sewer Rat, die”, or a snowman caricaturized as him, or a gingerbread man with a stake through its heart…or something like that. He made a mental note to repay him the courtesy later.

“I’ll think of you as I bite their heads off, Mr. Hatter,” he smiled at him.

Break shoved his fork rather forcefully into a pastry, though his expression didn’t falter.

Gilbert seemed like he wanted to scold him—or maybe both of them—but thought better of it.

Still, while perhaps a rather unimpressive present to others, this meant a lot to Vincent.

He never wanted toys—(he always tore up his toys anyways)—or books, or clothes, or even jewels. Since the beginning, all he wanted was for his brother to be happy.

He had always thought that the reason Gilbert had become so interested in cooking was because, back then, they had nothing, not even food. And the thought that he would make something special for him, now that he could, as if trying to reach back in time and give it to his past self…

“I love them Gil, thank you!” he threw his arms around him in a superfluous show of affection.

“Uhh n-no Problem.” Gilbert patted his back awkwardly.

Vincent closed the box and turned to leave, but Gilbert grabbed his shoulder.

“Are you sure you don’t want to...stay?”

“No, no, it’s fine!” Vincent put on that plastered smile, and hit play on his pre-prepared response, “I couldn’t possibly impose on your day.”

“Oh? But you impose on my day all the time. Often by your mere presence.”

He glared at the Hatter again, finishing, “I know when I’m not wanted.”

“Okay well...I hope you have a good Christmas, Vince!” Gilbert gave him a genuine smile.

“I will!” He waved goodbye.

I just want you to be happy, Gil. Even if it’s without me.

Even if I have to erase myself to do it. 

[i-prefer-the-term-antihero]

The Simplest Gifts Chapter 2: Bound by a Wish—Pandora Hearts Fic for Week 4—Prompt 2: Wish (Full Fic)

Fic Title: The Simplest Gifts

Chapter Title: Bound by a Wish

Character Focus: Vincent Nightray, Gilbert Nightray 

Fic Synopsis: Christmas may not be the happiest time for the Children of Misfortune, still, sometimes it’s the simplest things that can bring joy

Notes: 

Merry Christmas!!

Here's some Vince angst XD

Also, this one was edited even faster than the last one, so, once again, please forgive silly mistakes!

Chapter 2: 

“Close your eyes. Now...make a wish!”

“I just want you to have a good Christmas, Vince!”

Gilbert, brushing off a place on the snowy cobblestones, sat down beside his brother, handing him a piece of the bread he had spent much of the evening trying to steal.

He wore a smile, but his eyes were tired.

Do you really mean that, Gil?

There was a new cut on Gil’s leg since that morning, his raggedy cloak was even dirtier than before.

Vincent had learned to stop asking; Gil often lied and said the cuts and bruises meant nothing, or, if he told the truth, it just made Vincent feel bad.

He was so small, so young. They both were. To be this alone, this wanting. They didn’t deserve this.

Just because of his stupid red eye.

Vincent took the bread, brushing his hair over that curse.

He didn’t deserve this.

His brother didn’t deserve this.

It was clear he didn’t know it, but Gilbert’s words were like daggers to Vincent. Though he might have meant them to be encouraging, they dove straight for his heart.

I just want you to be happy.

I just want you to have a good Christmas.

Sharp pains straight for the beat.

Because, how could he? How could he have a good Christmas when they had nothing? When they could watch other kids ice skating, having snowball fights, eating candy canes, pressing their noses against shop windows, pointing at the toys and saying I want this for Christmas, Mommy!

Watch, and watch them go by. Never to join the games. No one to turn to who would buy them the things they wanted. No one to turn to. Not even a family, a nice fire to warm up by, or a Christmas dinner. They had to start asking for smaller, insignificant things—things they could actually receive.

They started asking for only each other's happiness.

And it was still too much to ask.

How could he be happy when he knew there was no way Gil could be?

I just want you to have a good Christmas, Vince.

Did he really mean that?

Was that the only thing? No toys in the shop windows? Not even a decent meal? A bit of warmth from the cold?

Surely he didn’t.

How could his happiness be enough?

Because he, Vincent, was the only thing keeping Gil from a normal happy life. If he just left him he’d be able to find a home, a family. Without him, their parents probably wouldn’t have abandoned him. Gilbert would be having a nice Christmas, opening gifts, eating cookies, by a cozy fire. He could be one of those kids with the rosy cheeks, and the spoiled rotten hearts.

If it weren’t for me.

Vincent was Gilbert’s chain. Tethering him to the gutters, the harsh words, and even harsher world. Without him, the world would surely be soft and cushioned, not full of sharp edges.

But if Gilbert just broke the link, he could still have that life, if he just left him behind...

Please don’t leave me behind, Gil.

The stars were especially bright that night. Cold shining speckles in a navy coat of sky.

Maybe it was fitting. It was Christmas Eve after all. Maybe the stars were trying to tell them that hope was not lost, that light remained.

Or maybe they were just a bunch of stupid lights, too far away to grant them any warmth.

He didn’t think he could ever find his way by them, by something so far from earth. Maybe they were just a bunch of shiny trinkets beneath someone else’s Christmas tree, candles on someone else’s mantle piece, and if he reached out to touch them they would turn to coal.

He saw that kind of light in his brother’s golden eyes too. Hope, keep going, we’ll make it through this, surrounded by the dark.

Which would win out in the end? The darkness of the light? Black or white? Navy or gold? The stars, or the spaces in between?

If Vincent reached out to touch his brother…would he ruin him too?

“Something wrong, Vince?”

Those eyes. Shimmering gold. Unending black.

Vincent clung to him all the same.

“Nothing, Nii-san! I’ll be happy this Christmas as long as you’re happy!”

“Okay....Open your eyes!”

As Jack pulled his hands from Vincent’s vision, the world was so bright it was almost blinding.

A Christmas tree—tall as 3 Jacks—was the centerpiece of the atrium, ascending alongside the staircase, to the ceiling. Tinsel spun and weaved its way around its boughs, and ornaments shimmered like sunlight on ocean waves. Presents littered the base, a little moat of jewels and dare he ask?

“Are...are those for…us?”

His voice was a tiny, shivering thing.

For, surely they weren’t.

Surely after all this time those glittering boxes couldn’t be for the the children who had nothing, who had never been given a gift in their life.

All that gold.

Like the stars. Like Jack’s hair, and Gilbert’s eyes. Like Vincent’s eye—the one that wasn’t corrupted by the color red.

A thing like him didn’t deserve gifts. They would surely rot beneath his gaze.

Although…red was there too. Many colored wrappings, holly berries, and ornaments…red and green, gold and silver.

Why would they put red in the midst of all that gold? Why would they infect the lively green, the rich silver, with the violence of red?

Did they not know the nature of such a color?

Surely they weren’t for him, no. They would be for the servants before they were for him.

“Nope,” Jack grinned mischievously, “they’re alll for me!”

Glen rolled his eyes before wordlessly kneeling down to pick two up, handing one to each of the children.

To Vincent, the tag read.

And the other, To Gilbert.

Before he even opened it, Vincent’s hands started to shake, and he felt his eyes burning with tears.

For me?

Such a simple thing. Such a small question.

Such a big gesture.

How could he believe that?

Still, it was written there in pretty curly letters.

The other three turned to him, eyes wide.

How could they want to give him anything? How could any of them care so much as to give something of themselves away to him? How could he hold the piece he received, be careful, cherish it, never let it break? How did they know he wouldn’t just destroy it, like he did all the lives around him?

“What’s wrong Vince?” Gilbert’s worried voice cut in.

I just wish this could last forever.

"Earth to Vince!”

“Ohh Sewer Rat~!”

As Vincent looked up from his sort of trance, he saw his brother’s concerned face—older now, less small, less dirty and weak, but also he…smiled less, now, somehow. Then he shot a nasty look at the Hatter, (who smiled pleasantly), before silently reading the tag on the present in his hand.

To Vincent, Love Gilbert.

Even now, the question ran through his brain; Do you really mean that, Gil?

He glanced up at the room. At the assorted mix of people, from different dukedoms. He and Gilbert were standing in the doorway (Echo in the hallway behind him), like he didn’t quite belong, like he wouldn’t quite fit in with the rest of them, like his dash of red wouldn’t fit in with their own little golden world.

He’d come to give Gilbert his gift, and be on his way. That was all. He didn’t intend to stay.

And by the sharpness to the Hatter’s eye, and his brother’s embarrassed glances, he knew he wasn’t wanted.

He didn’t want to ruin his brother’s day. All that mattered was that Gilbert was happy, even if he wasn’t a part of that happiness.

Still, his brother had decided to give him a gift, despite how Vincent had set his expectations against the possibility, and his protests aloud.

After Gilbert insisted once more, Vincent pulled on the ribbon, opening the box.

A pile of cookies beamed at him. Decorated as snowmen, snowflakes, gingerbread men, and Christmas trees. Some of the decorations, however, were notably more well done than others.

“I made them for you” Gilbert, rubbed the back of his neck abashedly, “I hope you like them.”

“And we helped decorate them!” Alice called, and Oz nodded happily.

Ah, that explained the discrepancy.

Although…he didn’t think that Gilbert’s little posse even liked him, why would they help him decorate a present for him? They probably just thought it was a game or something.

In truth, he wanted them all to be from Gil…

“You can probably guess which one’s from me!” Break sang.

Vincent couldn’t see it, but he surmised he’d probably find a cookie hiding somewhere, decorated in messy red ink that said “die, Sewer Rat, die”, or a snowman caricaturized as him, or a gingerbread man with a stake through its heart…or something like that. He made a mental note to repay him the courtesy later.

“I’ll think of you as I bite their heads off, Mr. Hatter,” he smiled at him.

Break shoved his fork rather forcefully into a pastry, though his expression didn’t falter.

Gilbert seemed like he wanted to scold him—or maybe both of them—but thought better of it.

Still, while perhaps a rather unimpressive present to others, this meant a lot to Vincent.

He never wanted toys—(he always tore up his toys anyways)—or books, or clothes, or even jewels. Since the beginning, all he wanted was for his brother to be happy.

He had always thought that the reason Gilbert had become so interested in cooking was because, back then, they had nothing, not even food. And the thought that he would make something special for him, now that he could, as if trying to reach back in time and give it to his past self…

“I love them Gil, thank you!” he threw his arms around him in a superfluous show of affection.

“Uhh n-no Problem.” Gilbert patted his back awkwardly.

Vincent closed the box and turned to leave, but Gilbert grabbed his shoulder.

“Are you sure you don’t want to...stay?”

“No, no, it’s fine!” Vincent put on that plastered smile, and hit play on his pre-prepared response, “I couldn’t possibly impose on your day.”

“Oh? But you impose on my day all the time. Often by your mere presence.”

He glared at the Hatter again, finishing, “I know when I’m not wanted.”

“Okay well...I hope you have a good Christmas, Vince!” Gilbert gave him a genuine smile.

“I will!” He waved goodbye.

I just want you to be happy, Gil. Even if it’s without me.

Even if I have to erase myself to do it.

[spookyjuicefiction]

Serendipitous - Chapter 17

MASTER LIST

Bucky x Reader

A/N: HELLOOOO I am back on my bullshit! Sorry for the lengthy hiatus, the last few weeks have been very insane but I am here, I’m queer, I’m ready to give you all of the sexy fluffy angsty Bucky you deserve. I’ve been having some writer’s block on what’s next but I think I’m on back on track now. Also I have been trying to figure out where I’m going to end this fic, I’m thinking potentially pre-Infinity War because like, it’s just too much for my emotions to get into that. And then maybe I’ll come back to it after Avengers 4 if it applies? Idk, what do you guys think? Anyways, here is another fluffity-fluff chapter for now, hopefully going to be able to crank out a few more this weekend. :) Hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think and if you want to be on the tag list!

__________________________________

“Ho, ho, ho,” Bucky’s tired voice in the doorway made me whirl around from the stove with a smile.

“Who are you callin’ a hoe?” I teased him as he dumped an arm full of bags on the counter and reached out to embrace me. After a lingering kiss I handed him the glass of champagne I had poured in anticipation of his arrival. “Merry Christmas, Sergeant.”

“Merry Christmas, Mrs. Barnes,” he said, clinking his glass to mine, and I hoped he was not paying attention to the way the phrase Mrs. Barnes made my heart skip to double-time as he took a large sip. He looked exhausted.

“I can’t believe you had to work on Christmas Eve,” I said, furrowing my eyebrows. He shrugged.

“Busiest day of the year for shipping things. And the time-and-a-half won’t hurt.”

I snorted at this. The rent on the apartment proved to be a drop in the bucket compared to Bucky’s income from the docks, and other than groceries and the occasional thrifted item, we were hardly spending a cent. Most of our free time these days was spent reading, listening to music, or--if we’re being honest--having sex.

“Hey,” he mock-pouted, “how else was I gonna get a nice Christmas gift for my best girl?” He pulled a small, gift-wrapped box out of his coat pocket and held it up teasingly, and my eyes widened. Smiling wickedly, he turned to the sitting area where we had erected a small, Charlie Brown-esque Christmas tree from the secondhand store on the coffee table. He placed the small box under the tree, stopping when he saw my small gift to him that was already nestled there. He turned back to me slowly.

“I don’t… I don’t think I’ve gotten a gift in seventy years,” Bucky admitted with a lopsided smile, and I felt my heart pang with sadness for him once again.

I cleared my throat. “Well, no pressure, then,” I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes to mask their wetness and turning back to the stove. A moment later I felt his arms around my waist as he pressed a breathy kiss to the back of my neck that made me shiver.

“I would love anything that came from you,” he whispered in my ear, and my stomach did a little somersault. He gave my backside a squeeze before pulling away to go and take a shower. I hoped he was right.

We had our Christmas dinner and drank our champagne, reminiscing about holidays past and swapping funny stories. I was heartened to see that Bucky seemed to be regaining his old memories more rapidly, and that he was able to recall details such as the hideous house coat his grandmother used to wear when his family would open presents. After a considerable amount of chatting there was also a considerable amount of smooching which, naturally, carried us late into the evening. When we resurfaced, Bucky squinted at the clock, his face lighting up with a huge smile.

“It’s 12:15--officially Christmas!” Reaching out, he plucked up the two gifts from under the tree and handed mine to me, giving his own an experimental little shake while he grinned goofily. His joy was infectious and it made me feel warm and content, all snuggled up with him on the couch in our tiny, ramshackle apartment. Our own little hideaway.

“You first,” I told him, because I knew that he couldn’t wait much longer, and he began to carefully tear away the red and green printed paper. I held my breath, feeling suddenly nervous and squeezing my hands together in my lap as he lifted the lid of the palm-size cardboard box. He removed the leather bracelet from inside, holding it up in the dim light to examine the intricate braiding woven around an ivory bead carved into the shape of a wolf’s head.

“It made me think of you when I saw it,” I blurted quickly, “Because you’re… strong, and wild, and… beautiful. And always protect me fiercely.” I felt lame saying it, but when when Bucky looked up at me, his eyes were misted over and I realized that I had, somehow, nailed it.

He seemed to be struggling for words. He held the bracelet out to me and offered his flesh wrist for me to fasten it onto, blinking rapidly. When it was securely in place, he clutched my hands and pressed them to his lips.

“Thank you,” he murmured, his voice gravelly, “It means so much to me. I will cherish it always.” I smiled and leaned in to kiss him, feeling rather pleased with myself, before feeling butterflies in my stomach all over again in anticipation of opening my own gift. I settled back against the couch and fingered the edges of the gold paper, my heart skittering as I recognized the felt texture of a jewelry box underneath. Tossing the paper aside, I took in a breath before lifting the lid. Inside was a delicate gold ring with a crudely cut black onyx stone in the middle flanked by two smaller murky white quartz on either side.

“It’s not--you don’t have to wear it on your ring finger,” now Bucky was the one blurting and rambling. “I just thought it was so unique and interesting, like you, and also kinda fucked up, like me, and that if you wanted to, you could wear it to… to always think of me. Or as your fake wedding ring. Or whatever you want. Or you don’t have to wear it.” I looked up at him with my eyes swimming with tears: he was nervously running his hand through his hair, frowning and seeming to second guess his choice.

“Of course I’ll wear it,” I choked out, my voice thick with emotion as I slid the ring onto my left ring finger. “It’s so beautiful. Thank you, Buck. I love… it.” I chickened out of saying ‘you’ as I turned to look at him. We smiled warmly at each other with mutual relief at the success of our gifts and he scooped me up in his arms again in a big hug. Looking at my hand over his shoulder, I admired the way the ring glinted in its position of honor and felt my face heating at the mental image of walking down the aisle toward Bucky on a real wedding day. I squeezed my eyes shut and popped that bubble; in reality, the way things stood, that could never happen. But for now, this was enough.

We held each other quietly for a long while, listening to the Christmas music tinkling through the boombox speakers and admiring the winking lights on the scrawny little tree. Never in my life could I have imagined that this would be how I was spending the holidays, but once again I felt that sense of rightness. Bucky seemed to read my thoughts.

“This is perfect,” he whispered, kissing my cheek and running his fingers through my hair. I smiled and nuzzled against his chest, breathing in his warm scent and sighing contentedly.

Yes. Yes, it was.

_________________________________

TAG LIST: @captain-chimichanga @allseasonssoldier (wait did you want to be tagged I completely forgot, I know someone else asked me and I think it was you?? Well you’re tagged anyway mwah mwah mwah)

[hils79]

I posted 3,383 times in 2021

266 posts created (8%)

3117 posts reblogged (92%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 11.7 posts.

I added 1,436 tags in 2021

#dmbj - 497 posts

#guardian - 237 posts

#the lost tomb reboot - 138 posts

#weilan - 108 posts

#zhu yilong - 104 posts

#asks - 80 posts

#liu sang - 75 posts

#my fic - 68 posts

#the untamed - 65 posts

#pingxie - 64 posts

Longest Tag: 100 characters

#most of the time i’ll find out about a comeback when someone on twitter says they’re listening to it

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Do you ever find yourself in a fandom without quite realising how you ended up there?

1 year ago today I started my first DMBJ show.

I freely admit that I started watching Reboot purely for Zhu Yilong. I knew nothing about the franchise or the characters, just that it looked like a fun adventure show.

I got attached to the characters enough that I decided to go back and watch Lost Tomb 1 to see how it all started and that’s how I ended up watching all all of the dramas over the span of 7 months (and I’m now working my way through Explore With The Note)

I wrote my first DMBJ fic as a birthday gift for @listening-to-thunder and just…didn’t stop? I’ve posted 105k of fic this year and nearly all of it is DMBJ.

It’s funny when I get into a new fandom usually I immediately start trying to drag people down with me. The thing is I can’t really recommend it. The dramas are kind of incoherent and badly edited, the books aren’t particularly well written. There’s just something about these characters that I find compelling and want to read and write about them.

Actually it’s funny that today is my tombniversary because yesterday these cute little guys arrived. I definitely live in this fandom now that I’ve started buying merch

But whatever you think of the source material this is genuinely such a nice fandom to be in. There’s not a huge number of us in the English speaking corner and I feel like we all love and support each other’s fannish endeavours

82 notes • Posted 2021-08-10 08:28:19 GMT

#4

Remember the time Pangzi, while inexplicably wearing a horse head mask, tenderly removed Wu Xie’s headphones after he’d fallen asleep

84 notes • Posted 2021-10-21 20:33:15 GMT

#3

I’d like to dedicate this post to beta readers. To the people who spend hours slowly and meticulously reading something I wrote, fixing any spelling or grammar mistakes, adding little comments about what worked and what didn’t, just so I can post the best possible version of my work.

Beta readers should be cherished and treasured.

103 notes • Posted 2021-07-26 06:47:08 GMT

#2

NPSS gave us a bunch of novels full of plot holes, some of which he abandoned before they were finished.

But he also gave us canon Iron Triangle retired domesticity where they live together in a house they built from scratch, run a restaurant, bathe together, and adopt a bunch of cats.

Thank you, sir.

132 notes • Posted 2021-10-18 05:46:48 GMT

#1

The many faces of Wu Xie

Lost Tomb: baby

Lost Tomb 2: somehow even babier

Ultimate Note: college professor

Tomb of the Sea: mafia widow

Lost Tomb Reboot: consumptive smartass

389 notes • Posted 2021-07-02 17:26:11 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[thedreamermusing]

20 Questions Writers Edition

Thank you for tagging me @ashesandhackles :D

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

17. 4. Two are from Naruto, and two are from HP.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

49,307 words (I’ve counted half the word count from ‘Beyond the Veil’ in the interest of fairness. :D)

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

2 fandoms, Naruto and Harry Potter. 

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Er...I have only published 4 fics lmao, so this is a copout kind of answer. I’ll just put my most kudosed fic instead. 

- Coming Back to Life- 1064 kudos, which is  😳. It’s a Kakashi time-travel AU which I shamefully haven’t updated in nearly a year and I’m still incredibly lucky to receive kind comments on. I do intend to complete it, though it will probably be shorter than I was expecting it to be. 

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I used to respond a lot earlier but I’ve been horrible with it lately. It’s not that I don’t appreciate the comments.  I just either don’t have the bandwidth, or am feeling too much guilt about not updating. I read and cherish them all. 

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Idk. Two of my fics are incomplete. So the one with the angstiest ending would probably be Turncoat. Given that the main character is Snape, this is not surprising. 

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Undoubtedly  - if these wings could fly (for the rest of our lives). A fluffy Kakashi/Obito reincarnation modern AU.  Pleasantly surprised by the attention this one got. It was my first ever published fic and the positivity it received gave me a lot of confidence. I would probably overhaul it if I wrote it today but I still have a soft spot for this fic. 

8. Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

Not yet. Don’t know if I will honestly. I personally prefer to see the characters in their own worlds, though I have read and loved some crossovers and AUs. 

9.  Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Idk if it counts as hate but there are people who get upset at you for not writing the character as per their wishes. Which is tough luck. I haven’t ever been flamed or gotten reviews that have torn my writing to shreds, thankfully. 

10. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Same answer as @ashesandhackles. I have written some for Beyond The Veil. Smut has always made me nervous so we’ll see how it goes.  

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nah

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. 

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

One with @ashesandhackles. It’s been a fantastic experience and I can honestly say ‘Beyond the Veil’ would not have seen the light of day if not for her. She’s a disciplined and gifted writer, and her interest in the project makes me feel motivated about it too. She has some lovely moments of character introspection and is really good at interior monologues. 

14.  What’s your all time favorite ship?

Kakashi/Obito from Naruto, Victor/Yuuri from Yuri on Ice!, and Snape/Harry from HP. 

15. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Gosh. I’m going to say none because I don’t want to jinx anything and demotivate myself. 

16. What are your writing strengths?

Tough question. I will say my prose is kind of decent, I guess? There are some turns or phrase and lines that I am happy about. I think I am also getting better at world-building and descriptions of places, establishing shots, if you will. 

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Where to begin. Humour is a big one. My favourite writers are deft hands at humour and I always struggle with it. Consistency with tense is another one. I love writing in present tense but I struggle sometimes with maintaining it. Also, dialogue is something I need to work on- maintaining a natural dialogue between more than 2 people.

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Depends on the story. I take it on a case-by-case basis. I’ve read a lot of fic for Naruto and generally find it cringy when people include Japanese in the dialogues like ‘baka’ or ‘teme’. But I do find that it adds characterisation in some cases. Like in Yuri on Ice, Viktor saying ‘vkusno!’ or calling Yuuri ‘solnyshko’ makes a lot of sense from a character pov as he is genuinely speaking in his mother tongue while he was speaking in English the rest of the time. So, it’s kind of a hit or miss for me. 

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Naruto

20. What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Coming Back to Life. Even though it’s been dead for so long and my readers are probably cursing me, I am proud of what I achieved in the fic. It was my first attempt at a long fic and at  36,674 words, I’ve learned a lot writing it.  I experimented a lot. It’s my best received fic for a reason. I’m proud of all the world-building I did in the fic; it wasn’t my intention while starting it but as I wrote it, I got a lot of different ideas to flesh out the world. I recently went back and read it, and was impressed with it though ofc a few errors stood out like copy edit mistakes and tense inconsistency. Still, I hope to finish it soon. 

I’m too lazy to tag but whoever else wants to give this a go, please go ahead! :D 

20 Questions Writers Edition

Thank you for tagging me @justfinishthis ❤️❤️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

17. 10 of them are Harry Potter works.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

39,946 words :D

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

8, if you include Harry Potter. I have written one piece each for Fruits Basket, Inu Yasha, Honey and Clover, Vampire Knight (yes I know 😳), The Host, Twilight saga, and one in Fushigi Yugi universe.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

- Beyond The Veil (Sirius/Snape AU fic) written in collaboration with @thedreamermusing

- Letters to No One (Sirius/Snape letter writing fic) written in collaboration with Vanisher.

- Stalemate ( Shigure/ Mayuko fic)/ Fruits Basket

- Expecto Patronum (James Potter one shot)

- Anatomy of The Haunted (Severus Snape one shot)

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I respond to each one. I think it's always interesting to see what people think of your work and what they take away from it and I am grateful people read it in the first place :)

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I primarily write angst, so this is a hard question! I think it's a tie between my Regulus one shot, Inferius and the one I wrote for Honey and Clover fandom: Nicotine.

7. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

It's Stalemate. The pairing I wrote for don't end up together, so there is some bittersweetness and "what if's" there, but they are both happy, so that's what matters XD

8. Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

No. I don't think I can either - way too much work to keep the characterisation and the universe straight!

9.  Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yes. I think sometimes people have very strong ideas of who characters are and your version of them don't quite work for them - so they let you know, loudly.

10. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Well, I have written it but it's not published yet, but there will be smut few chapters down the line in Beyond The Veil. (Dreamer and I thought of keeping it PG-13, but apparently that didn't happen. Now we have to change the rating too XD). It will be the first smut we would have published, I think.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope. Not that popular. :P

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. Not that popular for this, either.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Two - one with Dreamer, one with Vanisher. It's been a great experience. Dreamer and I are on the same page about a lot of things, so it makes working with her easier. She is also a stunning writer, and the lines she comes up with really stick with you. Our work quality wouldn't have been what it is without her.

Vanisher is another great co-writer! Their style is different from mine - more poetic, more angstier but haunting. I try to keep up. :)

14.  What’s your all time favorite ship?

Takiko Okuda/ Rimudo Roun from Fushigi Yugi Genbu Kaiden, Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa from Six of Crows duology.

15. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

None so far? I think I am on track for all the WIPs I am doing. I worry sometimes that Beyond the Veil is a bit too ambitious, but there is an ending in our heads and we want to get there :)

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think my writing is best when a character is wallowing in misery lol. That, and I have strong ideas for what can make a character more nuanced, perhaps.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Lack of restraint in the wallowing of misery, I guess. Some heavy handedness here and there. I have to work to keep certain ideas subtle and not to try to hit my reader over the head with it.

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

This would be challenging, since dialogue in English comes more naturally to me.

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter :D

20. What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Can I pick three? Echo (Narcissa character study) is my favourite one shot, Stalemate is my favourite completed work and I have a huge soft spot for Beyond the Veil for the way the fic started (it was because we enjoyed shitposting), the ambition behind it and sheer joy of writing it.

Tagging writers I admire/people in fandom I admire, but no pressure!: @thedreamermusing @pet-genius @yukisohmasmokesweed @lesbian-kyoru @yunsoh @thatawfulsnapeboy @lamelinam @thecat-isblogging-blog @vulgar-mercury @owlzerness @urupotter (honorary mention, since you published your first fic!)

[janiedean]

throbb week day four: fic recs!

OKAY THEN IT’S TIME. here we go, have a bunch of fic recs for y’all. handly c/p-ed from a couple of previous rec posts + new additions plus a few I read but didn’t manage to comment on yet SORRY GUYS I WILL AT SOME POINT so, without further ado, here we go. HAVE A BUNCH OF A+++ THROBB FIC

first: ao3 user (& tumblr user) embellished. EVERYTHING SHE WRITES IS GOLD. THE PUSHING DAISIES AU IS AMAZING god I still have to comment on it I’m a failure BUT ANYWAY EVERYTHING SHE TOUCHES IS GOLD GO AHEAD SHE’S A SURE THING. other than that.

night time, sympathize by eternal_elenea which is basically - like, it’s less than 2k of absolute perfection and it’s everything I’d strive for when it comes to writing a story while being synthetic and not cutting stuff unnecessarily and it’s gorgeous but yeah I suck at synthesis while she’s a+++. also her other throbb is amazing but that one’s my fave forever. (also canon divergence!)

the honeymoon phase by mataudite which is like the only power play GOOD throbb sex I ever found that I didn’t have to write myself thank you man that fic is in my faves forever

hold me still bury my heart on the cold by miranatural with reek!theon and ghost robb hahahah kill me

slowly, softly by xylodemon which is v. short but I’ll forever cherish it because it was written for me and I <3333 it and it’s everything I wanted out of robb spooning theon tbh

anything by archer_of_fate

anything by yina_ke

anything by queenwithabeethrone BUT ESPECIALLY THE GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY AU VERSE. THAT’S LIKE THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED TO ME LAST YEAR. IS2G THAT FIC IS A MASTERPIECE PLS READ IT.

500 days of winter by questionablemorals this one is so adorable I can’t even

as long as you stay with me, the whole world is my throne by mockyrfears KINGSGUARD THEON GUYS

no one would riot for less by queenasha (canon divergence!)

too much love will kill you by princekraken (this is gonna make you cry)

lady by wayoffbase on lj/the kinkmeme - feel free to ignore this if you’re not into crossdressing, but since this is the only fic on this planet that I haven’t written with this ship and this kink which happens to be one of my favorites ever, I’m always gonna rec /o\

our blood is still young by disolvedspine [you can’t ever go wrong with theon wearing robb’s clothes fluff okay]

the ones you think you love IS VERY GOOD AND IT’S EXCELLENT CANON DIVERGENCE AND IT WAS ALSO ONE OF MY GOTEXCHANGE GIFTS AND I SHALL TREASURE IT FOREVER

then pay yourself a favor and read EVERYTHING on IgnisEtGlacies13′s ao3 account because everything she’s written so far is amazing and perfect and my favorite home for reasons clear from the get go but the very first was also flawless. guys she made me read hogwarts au and I hate hogwarts aus she’s that good

also if you go on the old asoiaf kinkmeme pinboard throbb tag there’s quite a few things but in general everything written by heartlesskids is great like try to fish it out because it’s worth the effort

tumblr user @robb-greyjoy aka totemundtabu has a lot of excellent shit and I will absolutely recommend you awfully good, You fill me up, you fill me up, you set my soul ablaze, Looking for somewhere to be or looking for someone to do and Some nights resemble a bad habit but like pls read all the rest it’s a++++ even if he doesn’t think it is

Android Dreams and Electric Sheep by vagrantwriter is ABSOLUTELY A+++++ I’m a total fail for not having commented yet sdlkgjdlsk but like, SCIFI AU WITH ANDROIDS AND EXCELLENT DEALING WITH THE THEME? guys my fave movie is blade runner what do you expect from me. also a+++ dealing with robb I hadn’t read a robb who was that fucked up and at the same time so IC for ages like guys pls read it

other things I should comment on: the Only AUs Can Be Happy series by kereea on ao3 also has a++++ stuff, my personal faves are the mermaid and the d&d au but it’s all great stuff :’D

aaand Like a Fairy Tale by myzrajane is honestly adorable and I can’t ever have enough cinderella aus for these two u_u

I also realized I need to update my goddamned list why am I so shitty at keeping up with the tag lately AH WELL ANYWAY these are mine for the day have fun one of these days I’m locking myself in the tag and making a rec post with just new stuff ilu all <3