#also i drew him so gender it hurts me

[bengallemon]

He looks like he's dissociating so hard

[intoxicated-chan]

𝐈𝐭❜𝐬 𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐒𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐂𝐮𝐭!

Summary ➳ When you and the rest decide to sneak up on an Orc camp, you receive an injury. You believe you can handle it yourself but Legolas thinks otherwise.

(A/n) ➳ I AM SO SORRY! Tumblr ended up deleting the request but I remember it but not all of it so forgive me if this isn’t what you wanted. If it isn’t then don’t hesitate to shoot a message or request again!! I also learned that apparently the Fellowship traveled at night and slept during the day. I seriously did not know that until today.

Word Count ➳ 1.5k

Content Warnings ➳ Gender Neutral Reader, description of violence, blood, death, stitching, blood loss, angst-to-fluff…

“There must be some other way.” Legolas uttered to Boromir. “You cannot believe that sending (Y/n) out to assassinate the Orcs is the best solution.”

“She won’t be alone, Aragorn will be there with them.” Boromir replied. “The two of them will attack from above while we attack from below.” He drew his sword, walking closer to the Orc that was alone. He was swift with it, moving behind the Orc and slitting its throat. “See? Wasn’t that hard.”

You took a deep breath as you aimed your bow, you kept your focus on the leader. You could see from the corner of your eye Aragon sneaking up on the other two. You knew he was waiting on your signal and he would wait however long, but you were all on a strict time.

Another deep breath and- “Hey!” You shouted out of instinct, Legolas’s arrow went through the Orc’s head, killing him but you brought attention to yourself.

You jumped down from the tree and quickly nocked, drew, aimed, and released at one Orc that was reaching for its weapon. You swerved past another arrow, more flying past your head until you took cover over a giant rock.

Before you could nock another arrow, an Orc came from behind, grabbing your arms to throw you against the ground. You rolled when he attempted to stab you, dodging more swings until you managed to kick his sword away.

He charged at you, taking your knife that was strapped to your leg, and used it against you. You used your bow to block a couple of slashes until he fell to the ground. Instead of standing, he got onto his knees and managed to stab you in your thigh.

You let out a scream but in return, you shot an arrow through his head. Your breathing staggered as your hand wrapped around the knife and slowly pulled it out and then covered it with terrible bandaging.

“(Y/n)!” Legolas popped up a few seconds later. “I heard you scream.”

“I believed I twisted my ankle.” You covered your wound with your as best as you could, smiling through the pain.

“Let me help you.” Legolas took your hand, helping you walk to the rest of the group. Luckily, your cloak covered your bleeding wound and your dark pants were enough to hide the blood seeping out. “We just have a couple more hours before daylight.”

Like Legolas said, Aragorn finally decided that it was time to rest. “We will set out when it becomes dark.” He told you all before he started to set up his makeshift bed.

Legolas looked over your ankle, looking closely and pressing against it, looking back at you for a reaction. “It doesn’t seem to be twisted, but it may be strained. You have been jumping a lot, and might have happened when your footing was incorrect.”

You could practically feel the sweat running down your forehead. “Does it seem bad?”

Legolas smiled, his usual smile that was beaming with kindness. “No, the pain should fade later. Are you in pain or hurt anywhere else?”

“No, no, thank you.” After Legolas joined Aragorn, chatting. It wasn’t long before it was just murmurs among the Fellowship. Sam and Frodo were cooking together, Gimli was most likely perched up against a tree sleeping, but you didn’t know about the rest.

You were farther into the forest, a needle and thread in your hand. You placed a thick piece of fabric in between your teeth and bit down, you used your other hand to keep the gash close together so you could stitch it.

You let out a strained cry as you attempted to stitch your wound yourself but it was difficult due to your vision blurring. You didn’t know how long you were out here, so focused on closing your wound that you didn’t hear branches breaking or leaves crunching.

“You’re hurt.” Legolas’s voice broke you out of your concentration. You could see the panic in his eyes, he kneeled by your side, taking the needle from you and moving your hand from your thigh. “And you’re doing it incorrectly. You’re hurting yourself more.”

He used his other hand to pull a container of water, and flushed out your wound. “How did you get this? And when?”

“Just a couple hours ago.”

“And you’ve been bleeding this entire time?” Legolas’s voice was filled to the brim with regret, like he was ashamed of himself. He carefully threaded the thread into your skin, making sure it wasn’t too tight or too loose.

You took out the cloth from your mouth. “Look Legolas, I’m still alive and well.” You tried to ease him. “I’ll be alright, I’m okay.”

“I should’ve known, you have been moving slower, as well as your reaction time.” He acknowledged. Once he finished stitching your wound, he poured water again to wash out the rest of the dried blood.

He helped you to your feet, throwing your arm over his shoulder and an arm around your waist. He moved at a slow pace back to camp, everyone was now asleep, save it for Aragorn who just watched you both silently.

He helped you lay down. “I’ll be fine.” You repeated yourself, it felt like the hundredth time.

Legolas shook his head. “Please, do not hide anything. You shouldn’t be silent about these kinds of things.”

As if waking up very early in the morning couldn’t be any better, Orcs have seemed to find you all. You had a feeling that they were stalking you all, waiting for the moment to attack. You used your bow instead of your sword, making sure none of the Orcs came close to the Hobbits.

An Orc charged at you. You dodged the first couple of swings but not the kick to the leg, making you kneel and it felt like the stitches broke.

You screamed as you used your arrow to stab it into the Orc’s shoulder. Legolas’s arrow came from behind and slew the bastard and Merry came to your side to help you stand.

“Run into the forest!” Boromir shouted, blocking the sword coming down at him. “Go! Quickly!”

Merry helped you speed through the forest. You suddenly felt sick, like you wanted to pass out. But it wasn’t long before the Orcs gave up the chase and Merry sat you against a tree.

“They’re bleeding!” Merry alerted the rest of the Fellowship.

Legolas dropped in front of you, pushing your hands away from the wound. “I need a needle and thread.” He said, more like demanded. “Or a cloth to stop the bleeding.”

Aragorn ripped a piece of his shirt and handed it to Legolas, he snatched it and was quick to tie it around your wound. “I’ll need some herbs, in case the wound becomes infected.” Sam shuffled through his bag. “Luckily you should be able to walk but not run.”

You swore under your breath. “It seems the Orcs are watching us at all times.” You looked up at Aragorn. “What do we do?” You asked him.

“There may be another camp nearby.” Aragorn replied. “Boromir, Legolas, we need to search.”

“Someone should stay and protect the Hobbits.”

“Gimli is here and (Y/n) still has the strength to use their bow.”

“But what if they need to retreat? What will happen then?” Legolas still pressed, wanting to remain by your side. “We cannot put the Hobbits at risk, especially the ringbearer.”

“Gimli will be here, just go with them.” You told him.

“I will not.”

Aragorn was too annoyed to even put up an argument anymore. “Let us go then.”

When they were out of sight, you pushed his shoulder slightly. “What was that?” You asked him, confused out of your mind.

“Someone must be here to protect the Hobbits-”

“I know that, it would’ve been fine. They are taking care of the camp, the Orcs won’t be nearby to bother us.” You once again tried to explain to him. “What is going on with you? Are you still feeling guilty?”

“No-”

“Doesn’t seem like that.” Your breathing hitched as you attempted to stand.

Legolas grabbed your warm to stop you. “You cannot be moving at the moment. Give yourself time to relax.”

“It’s just a small cut!”

“A cut that could’ve killed you.”

You huffed. “What is going on with you Legolas?”

“Becoming reckless is one thing but hiding a serious injury that could have killed you is another. It makes me worry, it makes me question if you have more injuries you’ve hidden.”

“Look, I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you about the wound. I didn’t think that it would mean so much for you.” You admitted.

“I worry, I worry every single day, every fight, during the night and during the daybreak. Will the morrow be the day where someone or something takes you from me?” His hand grazed over your wound. “I just want to know I’ve done everything and anything.”

“I’m sorry.” You apologized again.

“Just promise me, I do not care how small it is or how big, please do not hesitate to ask for help.”

You nodded. “I promise.”

© Intoxicated-Chan 2023, I do not allow my work to be copied, translated, modified, adapted, or put on any other platform without my permission.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

okay okay rapid fire spider-verse thots fresh out of the theater, trying to minimize spoilers but jesus

da Vinci-looking Vulture... very cool

the art on Gwen's earth in general is SO cool

in general the animators were just SHAMELESSLY showing off with this one and it rules so hard

Rio Morales animated milf of all time

truly do not understand what all of you see in Miguel tbh that man suuuuuucks!! kill!!

Peter B is also on my shit list tbh. Gwen going along with this is understandable, she's literally a homeless teenager in a bad position to fight against adult spiders making decisions, but Peter... come on dude...

truly they HAD to leave Pav out of the middle of the movie because he would have sided with Miles (you think he would want Inspector Singh to die!! fuck no!!) and he's perfect so he would have just effortlessly swept the floor with every other spider-person

Gwen is flirtatiously trans coded and responds to Spider-Man at least once, congrats to her on the fun gender

Jessica's design is so cool but they made her such a cop... god I hope she's coming around in the next movie

cannot wait to see gifs of this movie slowing down every frame to point out every individual background spider-person

the fucking. the family of it all. Miles' parents afraid to let him grow up and Gwen's dad unable to accept the truth about his daughter and Miguel trying to raise a daughter who wasn't supposed to be his and Peter B's baby girl and Jessica Drew's visible baby bump and the spiders' collective miserable certainty that they are DEFINED by the trauma of losing someone they love.

something something Miles' parents and the spider society have the same problem - being afraid of change from what they thought was The Right Way To Do Things - but Miles' parents love and trust him to make the right choices beyond their understanding while Miguel and the other spiders are too hurt by their own traumas to imagine someone else thriving without it

also fuck all of them the boy's uncle died in front of him after trying to kill him HAS HE NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH

Hobie's soooo annoying (affectionate) but also right about, like, literally everything AND good with babies to boot

the whole ending is so ‼️‼️‼️‼️

the thing with Miles and Uncle Aaron at the end... you know the thing... DELICIOUS au right there tell me everything about that shit

the fucking end man

I've NEVER been in a theater where everyone collectively screamed @ the end of a movie fuck fuck fuck. there's cliffhangers and then there's THIS

[fallingdownhell]

I absolutely love your works!

Can you make hurt/comfort with kazuha, albedo, alhaitham, cyno?

Where we're on a heated arguments about them too focusing on their job and completely forgot about reader

In the middle of the argument, the reader said

"Was i really nothing to you? Was i just some kind of object that you can just forget that easily?"

Thank you

Thank you so much!<3

And of course I can! I am always down to write some pretty, delicious angst!

Characters Included: Albedo; Cyno; Alhaitham; Kazuha

Content: Gender neutral reader; pre sumeru archon quest for Cyno's part; hurt/comfort; arguments; shouting; slight cursing;

Word count: 6k words

Thanks so much for the request. Hope you enjoy the end result!<3

Albedo

It was rare for Albedo to come down from his lab all the way up in Dragonspine to the City of Mondstadt. You never really minded it, knowing that you could go there to see him at any time, while he also paid regular visits to your home.

Yet, for some time now.. those visits have stopped. He never came by anymore, far too consumed on some discovery he apparently made a few weeks ago.

Even when you travelled all the way to his laboratory on the mountain, in the icy colds of Dragonspine, Albedo had given you no attention whatsoever.

He had acknowledged your arrival, then went back to his work, while you were sitting in some corner by the fire, trying to warm up again. Even your attempts at conversation were flat out ignored, seeing as he never bothered to give an answer. You weren't even sure if he had noticed your departure a few hours after you had initially arrived.

You tried again two more times, but as you got the same result every time, you eventually stopped trying and didn't go back to Dragonspine.

Then, two weeks ago, you heard that Albedo was back in the city for a supply run.

Hoping that you would run into him to finally talk to him you spend your day in Mondstadt, but you never laid eyes upon him. When you asked Sucrose about it, she told you that he had already left again.

You went home to see if he made a trip there and you just so happened to miss him. But upon your return, you didn't find any note from him or any other indication that he had ever been here in the first place.

The same thing happened again a week after that, and by now you finally had enough. You went to the Acting Grand Master and she told you that Albedo would be back today again, to drop of some reports.

Which is why you were waiting for him outside of the Knights of Favonius headquarters, though still in some respectable distance.

When you finally saw him again after a few weeks, it felt like you haven't seen him for a lifetime.

So, without hesitation, you made your way over to him before he could enter the building. Yet, he seemed to be so deep into his own head that Albedo didn't even notice your approach.

Only when you were directly behind him and firmly said "Albedo.", did he stop and turn around, looking at you.

You could see the expression in his eyes once his gaze landed on you, like he had a sudden realization that you still existed and he had forgotten about that until that very moment. It honestly hurt.

"Hey. Where have you been all this time? I missed you..", you said, hoping to get some kind of positive reaction out of him.

"You know where I was, (name). I was busy.", he said and then turned around to leave again. You were honestly astounded that he simply wanted to let things stand as they are. Well, not today and most definitely not with you.

"You wanna leave? Just like that? Seriously?"

That seemed to have at least some kind of effect on him, as he stopped once again and turned in your direction. Except for this time, he wore an annoyed expression.

"What else do you want from me? I said that I'm busy."

After that, an argument broke out between the two of you in the middle of the street, but neither of you cared. No matter how much attention you drew upon you, it was too late now. You were both to heated and too caught up in it to stop now.

Things were said in the heat of the argument, you were sure both of you regretted ever saying out loud, yet neither of you could care less right now. Everything seemed to be fair game at this point.

Until Albedo said one specific thing.

"Archons, you're impossible sometimes, (name). Insufferable. I've better things to do right now, you know!"

Immediatly after he said that, Albedo knew he had crossed a line. The way you went silent, no comeback falling from your lips. You were just staring at him in shock, like you couldn't believe that he had just actually said that. He wanted to retract his statement, but his pride prevented him from doing so.

So, instead, you both just stood there for some time, silently staring at one another. When no reply came from you, Albedo dropped his head, then turned around once again. But before he could take a step, he heard your voice again, though this time, it sounded broken, silent sobs being held back.

"So, that's it? Was I nothing to you?", you whispered, your voice slowly starting to break from the tears forming within you, but Albedo was still able to hear you. "Just some kind of experiment or plaything that you can toss aside and simply forget about? Do I mean nothing to you?"

Upon hearing how broken you sounded, and what you actually said to him, he instantly turned around again, the sight of tears rolling down your face feeling like a knive had been thrust straight into his heart. And what's worst was that he was the cause for your tears.

You stood there, waiting for an answer from him. Yet, when nothing seemed to come out off his opening and closing mouth, you just nodded at him.

"I see..", you said, your voice now entirely void of any emotion whatsoever. That, and the fact that you were the one now turning around to leave him like that, was the twist of the imaginary knive in his chest.

Finally being able to break free of his frozen state, he rushed towards you, stopping you in your tracks as he pulled you into his chest, caging your arms around you, burying his face against your shoulder.

"I'm sorry.. I'm sorry.. I'm sorry..", he whispered over and over into your ear, which only made the tears fall from your eyes even harder. You were shaking against him, struggling to breath. You wanted to break free from him, but at the same time, you never wanted to leave his embrace again.

"I'm so sorry, (name). You're wrong. You mean everything to me. I'm sorry I made you feel like that wasn't the case. And I apologize for the horrible things I said to you."

You stood there for a few more seconds, basking in his arms, then decided to slip free. Albedo let you, almost certain that you would be walking away from him now.

But you didn't.

Instead, you turned around to look at him, allowing him to see your tear stained face that he was the cause of.

"I think... we have a lot to talk about..", you mumbled, not being able to look him in the eyes entirely. But Albedo still saw it as what it was supposed to be.

A chance. A second chance to talk things out with you, make it better between you two.

And he gladly took that chance.

From now on, he would do anything to put a smile on your face every day, never wanting to be the cause for your tears ever again.

Cyno

Two months.

That was how long it has been since you had your boyfriend to yourself for more than a few hours.

Every day, he came back from his work much more later than he usually would, sometimes even not coming home for days on end. He didn't even leave a note or something to inform you of his absence, making you even more worried about him.

And now, even when he was at home with you, he was so cold and distant towards you. Sometimes, he went straight to take a shower and then to bed, not even sparing you a second. Other times, he did spend time with you, but you could tell that his mind was somewhere else, giving only short answers to your questions and statements.

Seeing all this, you couldn't help the doubt starting to well up inside you.

Did he fall out of love with you?

Did you do something wrong? Was he mad at you?

Was he... cheating on you?

You didn't want to think any of these possibilities true, but it was hard to ignore them when Cyno was behaving like this.

You tried to talk to him about this, how you felt, a few times, but he never really listened to you, keeping the conversation short so you couldn't bring your point across.

And now, you began to not only doubt him and the relationship as a whole, you doubted everything.

Did he ever even love you?

Was he only doing this out of convenience?

Were you just.. something expandable to him?

All of these questions and doubts plagued your mind day in and day out, not being able to find any answers to them whatsoever. The only one being able to give you the answers you so desperately wanted and needed, refused to give them to you.

It was driving you insane.

And now, you hit your breaking point. You weren't able to take it anymore. The constant doubt had turned itself into a depressive episode. You wanted to break free from it, but you also wanted to give Cyno one final chance. One chance to explain himself to you, to tell you the truth.

If he refused again, you would not hesitate to leave. Your mind was made up, everything was arranged. You had a small bag prepared, filled with clothing and other stuff you needed.

Tighnari had offered you to stay for a few days at Gandharva Ville where you could sort yourself out if you were not able to talk things through with Cyno. You were so grateful to him, though a small part in you still hoped that it wouldn't come down to this.

That evening, you waited and waited for Cyno to return home from work, but with every passing hour that he didn't show up, you lost more and more hope that he would come home at all today.

You sighed and were about to get up from your spot in the living room to go to bed, when the sound of the front door opening caught your attention. After all, it could only be one person that has the other key to the apartement.

"Welcome back!", you greeted him as you went out to the hallway, seeing your boyfriend standing there. He looked at you with a tired expression but didn't say anything in return.

Instead, he walked right past you, not sparing you another glance. You were baffled, to say the least. That blatant ignorance from him was what gave you the last push you had needed.

"Seriously?", you just said, turning around to face him again, this time though, wearing a stone cold expression.

"(Name), please. Not right now. I'm tired in case you didn't notice."

"Oh, I did notice. But I don't care anymore, Cyno. We have to talk."

"Please, (name). We can talk tomorrow, okay? I just want to go to bed now, not argue about something trivial."

Oh, he really dealt the final blow with that one.

"So, that's it? Do I even mean nothing to you? Was I just some kind of object you can forget about? Does this relationship even mean anything to you anymore?", you threw all of that towards him, not caring that you got more and more worked up with every word you said.

When you were met with nothing but silence from him, you took that as his answer to your questions.

"Okay..", was all you said, turning around and grabbing your packed bag before you went out the door, not even sparing Cyno one last glance. You just wanted to get out of there.

Cyno just stood there for a few minutes, still looking at the spot were you were standing before. Only now did the events catch up to his tired mind, yet he still didn't move.

He saw the defeated look on your face, the way your shoulders slumped at his dismissiveness, but he shrugged it off. Instead of running after you and trying to mend this misunderstanding, he went to the bathroom, took a shower and then made himself comfortable in the bed.

He was sure you would have returned by tomorrow and then you could talk about it.

....

Two days.

Two days have gone by and you still hadn't returned home. By this point, Cyno was beyond worried about you. After all, it was dark when you went out and he hasn't heard from you since then and no one in the city seemed to have seen you, either.

Thinking back to your last words towards him made him want to beat his past self up for not sitting down and talking to you then and there. For not running after you and bringing you back. Back to him where you belonged to.

He knew that he was neglecting you these past two months. It's not like he wanted to do so. Work has been increasing for him, the sages at the Academiya were up to something, and not of the good kind.

It put a lot of pressure on him, yet at the same time, he had to try and keep a low profile, for his sake as well as yours. But in doing so, he didn't even notice how much he had distanced himself from you. He really wanted to punch himself in the face for that, but it's not like that would bring you back to him, so he refrained from it.

He had been searching for you almost the entire day when you hadn't returned yet again. But his search seemed to not be granted success today either.

Not knowing what else to do, he decided to head over to Gandharva Ville. Maybe Tighnari would be willing to listen to him and maybe have a suggestion on how he could find you and apologize to you.

Once he arrived, he immediately made his way over to his friends hut, not caring for all the looks other people gave him. He was used to it at this point anyways.

As expected, he found Tighnari sitting at his table, scrunched over some research report. Upon his entry, his ear twitched and he looked at his friend. Cyno did find it odd however, that his friend looked at him with such a surprised expression. After all, it wasn't unusual for him to arrive unannounced.

"Cyno? What are you doing here?"

"What, can't visit a friend anymore?", he said jokingly, though it didn't sound convincing at all, judging by the look on Tighnari's face.

"You're right..", Cyno sighed instead, grabbing an empty chair and sitting beside his friend. "I need your help. It's about (name).."

"Oh, that situation? Yeah, I've heard about it from them already."

"You did? From who? And when?", Cyno asked, suddenly gaining new hope. If you were here, he might still have a chance at finding you.

"From them. I offered them a place to stay for a few days. Though after everything they told me, I didn't think you would actually search for them."

So you were here... and his best friend knew about the situation and was severly judging him. Cyno knew he deserved it, but he still wanted to try and make things right again.

"Tighnari, please tell me where they are. I need to talk to them. Please."

Tighnari looked at him long and hard, most likely trying to assess his intentions.

With a sigh, he then turned back around, focusing his attention back to his research. "I gave them the open cottage on the other side of the village. They should be in there, seeing as they haven't left it since they arrived here."

"Thanks.", Cyno mumbled, scrambling to get up from the chair to rush to where you are. He was almost out the door, when Tighnari's voice caught his attention again, calling his name.

Cyno turned around, facing his friend again. "Don't fuck it up again.", he advised, to which Cyno nodded his head. He wouldn't, he would make sure of that.

When he arrived at your temporary residence, he immediately went to knock on the door. He waited outside for a few seconds, but no reply.

So he knocked again, more urgent this time.

Still no reply.

"(Name)!", he exclaimed this time, knocking on your door again, but still to no avail.

Getting desperate, he decided to just try and see if the door was unlocked or not.

It was. The door slid open soundlessly, inviting him inside. Carefully, he walked inside, letting his eyes take in the interior. Since the door and most of the windows have been shut, it was almost dark in here, and to top it off, he didn't hear a sound.

He was almost panicing again, thinking that you might have actually left this place, until his eyes fell on the bed, and on it, he saw your sleeping figure.

Relief flooded over him, finally being able to see you again and to actually have the knowledge that you were safe and sound.

He then walked closer to you, only to take in your state. You may have looked peaceful sleeping like this, but your eyes were red and swollen, telling him that you had cried before falling asleep. And he knew that the reason for your sadness had been him.

The need to punch himself rose again, for making you feel this way when he had promised to do everything in his power to never do that.

Instead, he decided to crouch down on the floor, next to the bed, gently taking your hand into his, placing a soft kiss to the back of your hand.

He would wait here until you woke up again, no matter how many hours from now that would be. He would wait for you and ask you to please consider talking to him.

He wanted to properly explain himself and apologize to you. Whatever you decided on doing afterwards, he would comply by it. If you wanted to break up with him, he would understand that. If you decided to give him a second chance, he would thank you on his hands and knees.

But that decision would be yours to make and he was prepared to accept whatever would be thrown his way. But for now, he was content with simply holding your hand, quietly enjoying your presence which he had missed so much...

Alhaitham

The Scribe of the Academiya has been getting more and more busy these days. Well, for now, it's best to say "former" Scribe, since he has been temporarely promoted to Acting Grand Sage.

You knew that your boyfriend had absolutely zero intention of keeping that position, even if he was more than befitting for it, seeing how knowledgeable he was.

But he much rather prefered a simple life, and you couldn't argue with that logic. Who wouldn't like that, especially when pay and work hours weren't really affected either way.

Still, for now, both you and him had to live with the changed circumstances, even though neither of you were happy with them.

Alhaitham was working even more now, trying to sort out certain matters until a new Grand Sage has been chosen. You haven't really seen or talked to him in days, yet you brushed it off, telling yourself that it would change again once he got his old position back again.

Sure, he may have cancelled a few dates and had to call off a get together with your parents, but that was perfectly understandable.

You continued to give yourself excuse after excuse, hoping that soon enough, things would get back to the way they were before all of this had happened.

Couldn't take too long...right?

...

Three hours..

You had waited for him, at Puspa Café, where you were supposed to meet for your first ever date in ages again.

And he didn't show up... Again.

You wanted to give Alhaitham the benefit of the doubt, but it was getting increasingly more difficult for you.

When you got to the home you shared with him, you were greeted by an eerie silence, telling you, that he wasn't even home to begin with.

Probably still at the Academiya, working.

You sigh, adding yet another dissapointment to the list, as you went into the bathroom to get changed into more comfortable clothes. To think that you dressed up for the occaison, only to experience heartbreak again.

It's really starting to get difficult for you to forgive him for all this stuff.

....

Yet another date cancelled by him, thanks to not showing up... Again..

But this time, he didn't even come home in the evening.

It had you worried about him beyond anything, not knowing what was going on since he always came back.

You didn't sleep that night at all, only for him to angrily walk through the front door at three in the morning, mumbling something about the incompetence of the people he was forced to work with.

He only spared a glance in your direction before he went straight into the bedroom. By the time you got in there as well, he was already fast asleep in the bed. And when you woke up in the morning, he was already gone, not even leaving you with a note or anything like he usually would.

Somehow, this was your last straw.

You endured the exact same scenario so many times before. Yet, somehow, this time was just one too many times.

Next time, you promised yourself, next time you see him, you would talk to him about it, no matter if he wanted or not. Because if you didn't then there was no reason in your eyes to continue this dying relationship.

....

Turns out, the next time you would see him would once again be in the dead of the night, thanks to Alhaitham not coming home again any earlier.

When he walked through the door, he was surprised to see you still awake. Normally, you would already be asleep and he would just silently slip under the covers next to you, enjoying what little he was able to get from being close to you again gave him, before he was also knocked out cold.

But with you standing there in front of him, expression cold and hard, he knew something was up with you. And yet, he just didn't have the energy to deal with that right now. He just wanted to sleep.

"We need to talk, Alhaitham."

No greeting, no nicknames, no nothing. You were definitely upset, yet he still tried to get out off talking right now.

"Can we do this tomorrow, (name)? I'm tired."

"You mean like all the other times you promised me something and then stood me up? No, I think not. We talk about this now."

Oh, so that's what got you so upset?

"Look, I told you I would be busy for some time until things at the Academiya get sorted out. You can't tell me you didn't know about this.", he tried to reason with you, but it only seemed to upset you even more.

"You did say that.. but it's been weeks since I've last actually talked to you. It feels more like I'm your housekeeper right now, not your partner."

"This is absurd. Now you're just thinking too much into things, (name)."

After that statement, an argument broke out between you two, right here in the hallway where you "greeted" Alhaitham. You weren't full on shouting at each other, but you were talking pretty loudly. If people were to walk by outside, they could probably hear every word you guys were throwing at each other.

But neither of you cared right now.

At some point, Alhaitham walked past you, into the living room, trying to escape the argument. But you insisted on continuing it, following him into the room and at this point, he was getting fed up with the situation.

"Archons, (name)! Can you just shut up and leave me be? I don't have time for trivial things right now!"

Immediately after he said that, you went silent and his words caught up with him as well.

He looked at you, saw how tears started to form in your eyes and instantly regretted ever letting those words fall out of his mouth. Nothing was more important than you in his eyes, and yet, he still said that to you. Like you didn't mean the world to him, which you did.

"(Name)-!"

"So, what? Was i really nothing to you? Was i just some kind of object that you can just forget about that easily? To toss aside when you don't want it anymore?"

You hated how your voice cracked halfway through, how tears started to escape your eyes. And despite how much his words had hurt you, you still didn't want to run from the situation. You had to see it through.

"If that is how you truly feel about me, maybe we should end-!"

Before you were able to end your sentence, you were suddenly pushed against a strong chest, warm arms keeping you in an embrace you had longed so much for, yet right now, it wasn't comforting at all.

"Let go off me..", you stated weakly, giving no indication that you planned to reciprocate his sign of affection.

"Never..", he whispered, and with the way he sounded right now, you could almost think that he was starting to cry as well. Almost..

"I'm so sorry, (name). I truly didn't mean to say that. Please, you have to believe me, I don't mean it. You are not trivial to me, nor is our relationship.

I.. I love you. I truly do. Though I don't openly say it that often, that doesn't mean my words hold any less truth in them. You have to believe me."

"I want to... I really want to believe you, Alhaitham. But with the way things are and have been for those weeks... I don't think I can.."

By now, the tears are streaming freely from your face and you weakly put your hands against his chest, needing some kind of stability.

"Then let me prove it to you. Let me prove to you that I still love you like the first day, that I never stopped loving you, even if my words and actions made you think otherwise."

You were silent after that for some time, thinking it over. You had no idea what the best course of action for you would be, but in the end, you decided to go with what your heart was telling you. Wether or not you would regret that decision, you had to find that out in the future.

"...One more chance. You better don't fuck up again or I'm leaving for good.", you mumbled against his chest, his shirt already stained with your tears, but neither you nor Alhaitham cared about that in the slightest.

All he could focus on, was you in his arms and the fact you granted him with another chance. And he intended to use it the best he could.

Kazuha

Between travelling around the different nations and helping out Beidou on board of the Alchor from time to time, Kazuha never really had much time.

You love Kazuha. You really do...

But sometimes, you just can't help but wonder if you even have a relationship with him at this point.

When he's gone again, for weeks or sometimes even months on end, and the only form of communication with him stems from a few letters sprinkled in between here and there, how could you not doubt?

In the beginning, you used to travel around with him. And while you enjoyed the time spent with your boyfriend, getting to see all those different places and creating wonderful memories with him, you eventually grew tired of it.

That's not to say that you didn't enjoy wandering around the nations with Kazuha by your side, but you just couldn't imagine spending your entire life like this. Never being provided with a place of your own, to call your home, constantly on the go.

It just wasn't your way of living.

Kazuha understood that and would never force you to accompany him, just like you would never force him to stay with you, even when sometimes the loneliness just got more to you than on other days.

He always came back to you, but he never stayed for more than a few days before he was out the door again, not to be seen for an unknown amount of time.

It was difficult, living like this. You tried to live off the memories and happy moments you had with him when he was here with you, but it wasn't enough anymore. You wanted him by your side again, but you also knew that he would suffer in the long run if you were to ask him to stay here with you.

However, in your mind, it also wasn't an option to just leave thing unmentioned.

Which is why you made the desicion, that the next time he would come home to you, you needed to talk to him about your thoughts and feelings, in hopes you could come to a solution together.

.....

Turns out, the next time he's home again would be three months later. And like always, only letters could have been exchanged throughout this entire time.

Kazuha already had a sneaking suspicion that something wasn't right with you. He couldn't exactly pinpoint it, but the way you were writing in these letters sounded off from your usual way, which is also why he tried to make it back to you as soon as he could. He felt bad that it still took him this long, but there was nothing he could have done about it.

The city he resided in when he got that particular letter from you underwent a strict lockdown only hours later, due to a prisoner escaping. The entire city had been shut down to find him as quickly as possible, all forms of communication had also been cut short.

It took them three weeks to apprehend the convict again, and as soon as the city doors opened again, Kazuha was out of them and on his way back to you.

...

When Kazuha arrived back at the little cottage the two of you shared, it was in the late afternoon.

Already, when he opened the door, he was absolutely certain now that something was wrong. Usually, you would come running to greet him at the first noise or hint that he had come back.

But now? Nothing.

"(Name)? I'm back!", he yelled, in hopes of getting your attention this way, but still, no reaction. Maybe you were out buying groceries or something?

Still, Kazuha decided to wander through the different rooms, just to make sure he wouldn't miss anything. And now, he's glad that he did as he saw you sitting on the patio, wrapped up in a comfortable blanket.

As he approached you, he noticed that you must be deep in your thoughts, just staring ahead of you. He gently opened the door and when that also didn't seem to catch your attention, he decided to speak up.

"Darling?", he asked, cautiously, not wanting to spook you.

You flinched a little at the unexpected sound coming from behind you, but just as quickly, you relaxed again, realizing who that voice belonged to.

"Kazuha. You're back.", you stated, grazing him with a small smile as you turned around to look at him, but nothing more. Normally, you would jump up into his arms, almost taking his breath away.

But Kazuha didn't say anything about it, instead, he grabbed one of the other chairs and sat right beside you. He gently took one of your hands into his, holding it like that. He missed this, missed this physical contact with you.

"Please.. Tell me what's been bothering you, darling."

"....was I that obvious?", you asked, causing a small smile to appear on Kazuha's lips. But he didn't answer, instead waited for you to continue on.

You sighed, fixing your gaze away from him and ahead of you again, thinking about how to best approach this. It was silent for a few minutes until you spoke up again.

"It's just... You're always gone for so long that I-!"

Before you could actually finish your sentence, Kazuha began to groan beside you, making you look at him in confusion.

"(Name).. you know that I don't like being bound to one place."

"I know that, but-!"

"No but's! You knew what you were involving yourself in by being with me. Why are we even having this conversation now?"

You were shocked, not expecting Kazuha to immediately get so defensive about this. All you wanted was to talk to him and maybe propose an idea you had got when he was away. But the way he was acting right now made you feel bitter.

"Can you just listen to me? I'm not trying to confine you, I just-!"

"Yes, you are, (name). What else could you possibly want to achieve by beginning the conversation like that?"

Fed up from being interrupted by him a third time now, you've had enough. An argument started to ensue, when you didn't even intend for this to happen.

You've never experienced something like this with Kazuha, he was always level-headed, calm and collected. So why was he suddenly getting so defensive over this topic. It really wasn't like you were trying to hold him here.

But, with each thing said, both you and him grew more and more heated, the shouting starting to get louder and louder, until Kazuha suddenly stood up.

"If I knew you would get like that, maybe I shouldn't have returned at all."

As you heard him say that, you instantly went silent, looking at him with your eyes wide open.

No.. he couldn't mean that, right?

It also now seemed to catch up to Kazuha what he just said, as he also turned to look at you, shock written all over his face.

"(Name), I...", he began to stay, but trailed off, not knowing what he even wanted to say in the first place. He knew he had fucked up with that statement.

"So, that's it? I wasn't anything to you? Just something you can toy with when you get bored, only to be thrown away when you don't want me anymore?"

A single tear escaped you, running down your cheek and Kazuha immediately had the instinct to wipe it away from your beautiful face, to pull you into his arms and tell you how sorry he was.

So he did just that, pulling you into him, holding your face against his chest as he held your head secure with his hand, your tears now starting to come out freely.

"I'm so sorry, darling. I didn't mean to say such horrible things. No words can express how much I regret ever letting them out of my mouth."

You weren't able to answer him, your breathing being erratic, trying to choke down your sobs and crys. It positively broke Kazuha's heart that he was the immediate cause for this.

He just let you cry in his arms until you calmed down again, all the while he kept apologizing to you over and over, telling you how much he loved you and how much you meant to him.

The two of you would have to continue this conversation, but not today. Not when both of you were this wound up from everything that had happened.

The talking could be done tomorrow. Now was the time for healing...

[srvbryn]

I can ask for something like Luke x reader where during the mission there are many romantic moments.[ In one of those moments Luke wants to buy something for reader with his savings from other missions] ❤️💘 please I just want my addiction.

Luke Castellan. You and I are meant to be

Luke Castellan X gn!reader (no specific godly parent)

Summary: sweet moment with Luke Castellan during a quest

Warning: none! Just fluff<33 this one is very short 😓

A/n: I'M 100% SUPPORTING YOUR ADDICTION, don't forget to tell me what gender you want <3 and also which gods you want to be the godly parent!

i. You're smarter than me and yet you still fell

An unsuspecting rock caught your foot and caused you to stumble. Before embarrassment could set in, a strong hand reached out to steady you. It was Luke Castellan, smirking.

"Smooth move there," he teased, a playful glint in his eyes.

Blushing, you shot him a mock glare. "Thanks for the rescue, Captain Obvious."

Luke chuckled, "Anytime. Wouldn't want my partner to get taken down by a mere rock."

As the laughter died down, Luke extended his hand to help you up.

The contact lingered for longer than necessary, with a gentle warmth passing between you. You couldn't help but smile, grateful for the unexpected help and shared amusement.

"Careful, (name)," Luke grinned, "I'd hate for my heroic moment to go to waste."

ii. I'm sorry for letting you get hurt

Luke gently guided you into the small clearing in the forest, concerned on his face. "Easy there, (name) Let's get you seated."

You winced as you sat in a worn-out chair, the aftermath of the dangerous situation still coursing through your veins.

Luke knelt beside you and retrieved a makeshift first aid kit.

"Okay, deep breaths," he reassured, his fingers deftly working to inspect your injuries.

You couldn't help but chuckle weakly. "I always knew doing a quest with you was a risky business, but I didn't expect to become a demigod pin cushion."

Luke shot you a sympathetic smile, "Well, you can thank the monsters for that. But don't worry, I've got this."

His touch was gentle, and the soft exchange of words set a relaxing rhythm.

"You know," Luke mused, "I didn't sign up to be a nurse, but I guess it comes with the territory of saving demigods."

You smirked, "Who knew being a hero came with perks like this?"

"Better?" he asked, finishing the last bandage.

You nodded, grateful for both his skills and his company. "Much better, thanks to you."

Luke's eyes met yours, a warmth in their depths. "Wouldn't want anything to happen to my favorite quest partner."

A blush crept onto your cheeks, and you playfully nudged him. "Careful, Castellan. You might be getting soft on me."

iii. You said you're not cold and yet you're in my arms

"It's peaceful out here," Luke remarked, his eyes fixed on the stars.

You nodded, "Yeah, a nice break from the chaos. Almost makes you forget we're on a quest."

As the temperature dropped, shivers ran down your spine. Luke noticed and instinctively drew you close. "Getting cold, (Name)?"

You smiled, enjoying the warmth radiating from his presence. "A little. But I can handle it."

Luke raised an eyebrow, "Stubborn as always. Come here." He opened his arms, inviting you into a gentle embrace.

Leaning against him, you felt the comforting heat as he wrapped his jacket around both of you.

"You know," Luke began, his voice soft, "I didn't expect to find moments like these on a quest."

You chuckled, "Well, life's full of surprises, especially when you're in danger most of the time."

His fingers absentmindedly traced patterns on your arm. "True, but I'm not complaining. It's nice to have someone to share these moments with."

"You ever wonder what's out there beyond the stars?" Luke mused.

You followed his gaze, "Sometimes. But right now, I'm just happy to be here with you."

iv. You said you're tired so I let you sleep on my laps

"Sit down for a moment, Luke," you said, finding a comfortable vantage point.

He nodded, grateful for the chance to rest, and settled against a tree. You joined him, the coolness of the night settling around you.

Luke's exhaustion was palpable, his eyes heavy with the weight of the challenges ahead.

"You've been pushing yourself hard," you remarked, concern evident in your voice.

Luke ran a hand through his disheveled hair, a tired smile on his lips. "It's the nature of the quest, (Name). No time for breaks."

You leaned back against the tree, allowing him to rest his head in your lap.

The simple gesture elicited a content sigh from Luke. The soft rustle of leaves and the distant sounds of the camp formed a gentle backdrop as you gently stroked his hair.

"Close your eyes," you suggested, "I'll keep watch for a while."

The quest could wait; the exhaustion in his bones demanded this pause.

You smiled down at him, "Sometimes, all we need is a moment to rest and recharge. We can't save the world if we're running on empty, right?"

Luke chuckled softly, "You're wise beyond your years, (Name)"

Hours passed, and you remained steadfast in your position, unwilling to disturb Luke.

Occasionally, he would shift, seeking a more comfortable position, and you adjusted accordingly.

As dawn approached, the first light of the day painted the sky pink and orange. Luke stirred, blinking his eyes open.

"Thanks, (Name)," he said, his voice carrying a warmth that mirrored the rising sun. "I needed that."

v. You should be glad I'm not stealing it

Luke subtly excused himself, claiming to be scouting the area. Unbeknownst to you, he had another mission in mind.

With a determining glint in his eyes, Luke slipped away. Not so carefully because he keeps accidentally tripping over a rock.

While you and the others were setting up camp, Luke disappeared and made his way to a nearby town.

"I hope I can find something special here" Luke said with a sigh. The market appears to be nothing special - a small rundown market in the middle of nowhere. What did he expect to find there? Nothing.

The distant sounds of your camp echoed in his ears as he entered the quaint marketplace, determined to find the ideal materials for the bracelet.

Luke conversed with the shopkeeper while carefully selecting sparkling beads.

"I need something special, something that reflects the night sky," he explained, his eyes betraying a hidden motive.

The shopkeeper, unaware of the quest taking place in the woods, enthusiastically assisted Luke.

"Ah, a night sky-inspired piece, what an excellent choice! Is it for someone special?" they asked.

Luke, maintaining his secrecy, simply grinned. "You could say that."

Back at camp, you were wondering about Luke's - it had been 30 minutes and you were concerned! "Where's Luke?" you asked the others.

"He said he's scouting deeper into the forest," one of your half-siblings replied with a shrug.

Meanwhile, in the marketplace, Luke happily received the carefully wrapped bracelet from the shopkeeper. "I hope it brings luck to your journey, whoever it's for," the shopkeeper said with a knowing smile.

As he approached the camp, he couldn't help but feel nervous.

When he returned, you greeted him with a curious smile. "Find anything interesting?"

Luke's eyes flickered as he handed you the wrapped package. "Maybe I did," he said, trying to hide the anticipation in his voice.

As you unwrapped the bracelet, Luke couldn't help but catch his breath.

Your face lit up with a genuine smile as the beads glinted in the firelight. "Luke, this is incredible! Where did you find it?"

He chuckled, grateful that his secret mission had been a success. "Just stumbled upon it. Thought it might bring you a bit of luck on our quest."

[tocomplainfriend]

VIV is constantly criticized by her own fault.

TW: Mention of: SA, Rape, Transphobia, fat phobia, Antiblackness.

(Hey, i'mma probably do a post eventually about episode 4. Btw, awfully shit, worse than I thought it could be... BIG TW OF R-PE AND SA IF YOU'RE GOING TO SEE IT. AND TW of the minimization of those topics too.)

(SORRY FOR BAD ENGLISH IN THIS POST TOO)

BUT I NEED TO CALL ATTENTION TO THIS! One of the reasons I criticize a lot of Viv specifically is because of how much she puts herself out there. She sees something she posts on Twitter about it a shit ton (even on "threads" lol). AND because of how lacking of improvement she has being. (I personally know people I have considered terrible when we were teens, but I have seen legit improvement from them in recent years. They seem like people who struggle, but got to grow up and made up for any problems (or pain caused to me or others). People have the ability to change and become better. Something that matters at pointing out issues or discussing-is the idea of creating change on others. It is better to get someone to change for the better than to cast them into the forever jail of nothingness (unless, IDK, they Sexually Assaulted someone, for example). Specially when they are young people. Doesn't mean YOU have to stick with other people that hurt you, no. Doesn't mean people get to do what ever and get away with it.

BUT All of this problem I have seen from Viv are from age 19-30. (you can change at anytime btw) And see constantly repeats herself and her actions. Seems to have never accepted criticism (said by herself too), and never able to see her own faults. The fact that is a continuous behavior is a problem, how she always responds is awful. My post of "Viv has being transphobic for 10 years", was to signal that. If she really had changed over those 10 years to a genuine thing- I could've taken that! But no, the shitty double standard against trans men... the weird treatment. THE MANY STORIES OF EMPLOYEES GETTING MISGENDERED HEAVILY, TOO.

(I know people who were transphobic [When they were teens mainly], that Genuinely improved and changed their beliefs. Now they treat trans people with respect and care! And still learning about gender-fluid people, too!)

It just seems to be further and further away from getting better! The fact that she only decides to take in account voices from SA victims that agree with her- it's painful as a victim, my self!

And yes, people who sent gore or dumbass shit to Viv (or the team) don't help. And go get help why you're looking and sending Gore to anyone. (Also, stuff like this does lead to people not listening to others people genuine callouts). The fact that I criticize something doesn't mean I agree with the people that go and do shit like the thing I just mention above.

AND ALSO A IMPORTANT THING HERE!

This drawing was created by DollCreep. BUT ALSO FUCKING REMEMBER this was done in response to the shit that Viv drew of him.

If you didn't know Viv drew a transphobic caricature of DollCreep using the name Jojo (his old nickname). This put together with a shitty anti-sjw meme video. DollCreep is a transman, Viv drew a character based on him. A furry wolf girl, If you can see in the image the main thing listed below the character name is the fucking "Sex=♀️". SO ON PURPOSE, CHRIST. Like... AND YES-is shitty from both to have drawn this (even if it was in respond) mainly immature in DC part. But that, or any toxicity coming from DC, doesn't delete the transphobia here. (imagine drawing a racist caricature of a poc person, because they are shitty to you). THE POST LINKED ABOVE SHOWS THE SITUATION, and in the end of the day. Viv says that DC is an abusive shitty person to her, but never realizing her own faults or anything she could'be possibly done wrong! (and again, any wrong done by DC in general can not be deleted by the fact of having being treated badly. If he did shitty stuff himself, that doesn't delete the wrong done in general to him or to others by viv)

Here about transphobia:

(this is like 8yrs old too)

Again, she never acknowledges anything that she might have done wrong. "She is a thoughtful person, that wants tor write queer and disabled characters! She wants to tell empowering stories of..." It doesn't even feel close to that when people bring up actual problems in her writing that are stereotyping or bad, and she just yells and cries. It all feels like empty sticks she is only interested in in the surface level, she doesn't want to actually deal with.

When she says "This characters is black guys ♡♡♡" and then the fucking 7th, a grayish character with zero black features. She can not actually try and draw a black person with a different hair texture, she'll faith is hair isn't straight and spiky (has done this so much too). She is all for positivity and diversity (can not draw more than 1 character that isn't a fucking stick with the same stupid face).

She can not write relationships in general. She cannot do gay couples, then don't lean on the stupid old uke uwu defenceless x big rough seme protector stuff. Again, all the interactions with Husk and Angel are sexual harassment. They are already a revealed future couple (and episode 4 is terrible for them, specially with that song). Stolitz is toxic, and predatory. That is not acknowledged, and all Stolas's predatory behavior and power dynamics are put in the background, cause- "look how sad Stolas is :(! HIS DAD IS SOOO MEAN, HIS WIFE IS A BITCH". All her gay characters are in pure surface: over-sexual twinks that are assholes, which also fit into the top/bottom as personality boxes.

Any other point includes sexual harassment as a joke. BUT KNOW SHE WANTS TO BE LIKE "GUYS SA STORIES MATTER, LOOK AT WHAT I WROTE" as if she didn't lean back into the problem of the diminishing of SA and r- (in general and done to men) with her jokes in HB. With all the sexual harassment that Angel Dust puts on Husk and others. (AND YES THERE IS NO WARNING IN EPISODE 4, FOR ITS HEAVY TOPICS! I do believe all series/movies with this need it. SPECIALLY IF IT'S SO GRAPHIC! "Sexual content" is not the same as a warning for SA or R-pe. An adult can see a movie with sex or sexual nutidy- when they see that- but it's different to get straight assault on screen. Victims can watch movies/series with sex in them all good, you cannot just group consensual sex in the same assault or R-pe...)

The thing where Mammon (the only fat character that isn’t from the fucking background.) is like FIZZ YOU NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT. AS IF SHE COULD EVEN DRAW ANY DIFFERENT BODY SHAPE WITHOUT DYING. Like there is only Mimzy (hasn't appeared yet, not given any importance. In the female lead show). Mammon the piece of shit (does the same as Blitz, but he is actually fully bad.) His design is done with 80 fucking layers on top. Like all the test of the skinny character's clothes suck up to their body except for Mammon. His body is hidden in layers upon layers of clothing (that's all you got?). All you main guys need to fill "the skinny have nothing men" and "skinny woman with big hips and legs, but no fucking stomach"?

AND YES! VIV DOES DO THE FUCKING, "FAT = FOOD LMAOOO". You know the thing HH fans and hater where like the "Bee needs to fat thing is bad, cause of fat = food (only food) is reductive and shitty"

(Can I refer to how the show Bojack H, make Diane gain weight cause of anti depressants- and it wasn't a joke! And she was happier too?)

(mine, from post right below)

... like is a bundle of issues. And Viv will never accept that she might be /or is wrong. That's why it hits the fan with stuff. -And again I liked many of the little concepts and stuff in HB and the original pilot of Hazbin. Shit- I still like Sir Pentious and Nifty. I do like Mammon as much as he is a pack of problems to call out, I fucking love the piece of shit Australian jester- The artist work hard on it, and I'm happy it's an openly queer! (as limited as it gets, too....). I liked Huni-cast, I loved the original voice cast! -and that happens! I could be writing this about other stuff too, not only Hazbin... if I created this blog earlier- IT WOULD ALL BE ABOUT RWBY, DANGANRONPA, even svtfoe...Ladybug... or Agretsuko's ending too. So yeah, sorry for the long post (as if all my post weren't)

[rougepancake]

Here is my revised request lol

Where it's a one-sided love/crush with yushiro, mitsuri, Obana, and Lady Tamayo, how the reader wishes them all the best but also just wants them. If there is even a sliver of chance for them to return their one-side love. If you feel like it, maybe they might have someone who is helping them move on from the one side love?

Get ready for this to hurt.

And if you’re in love, then you are the lucky one.

FT. Yushiro, Kanroji Mitsuri, Iguro Obanai, and Lady Tamayo. Gender Neutral reader.

WARNINGS: Angsty as hell. I drew the title from the song Youth by Daughter. Some reciprocation in Obanai’s. I also hope I did Yushiro justice. I’ve never written for him before. Um pretty emotional overall. Don’t forget to put on your sad music while reading this. These are going to be pretty long. Some were very obviously cut short due to how long they were getting, for that, I apologize. Please bear with me 😭

YUSHIRO

Each day you awoke longing for a purpose, and every time the day failed you. It wasn’t until you caught wind of the Demon Slayer Corps that things finally started to look up. It seemed perfect. You’d undergo training and then participate in a simple survival event. Of course, it wasn’t as easy as it sounded. The training you underwent was harsh, and the final selection was even worse. Each time the sun set you feared for your life until you remembered that this was the challenge that you had been waiting for. You claimed it to be your calling, despite not being very good at it.

When it was all said and done, you picked the metal for your weapon and went about your business. There had only been one other person to make it out of the selection alive. You remember being surprised. How could so many people have trained so hard only to lose their lives? One would have thought that they would have been properly prepared before entering the challenge. Though, you were hardly prepared yourself. It was nothing but sheer luck that kept you alive, and you were more than grateful.

It wasn’t long before your crow had begun to send you all over to complete missions. Each demon you encountered seemed to be much stronger than the last, a thought that frightened you. With each one you killed, you felt yourself growing more powerful. Your breathing techniques were perfect, it was just your lack of physical strength that caused you to struggle. But you weren’t too worried about it. If you had been able to take down the ones before, then there was nothing stopping you from taking down the one now, right?

Right?

That’s what you thought when you chased the lower rank six of the Twelve Kizuki into a corner. You were sure that it had nowhere else to go, which would ensure that you’d be able to kill it and move on to the next place. You were sure that if your stance was just right, then you’d be able to land the perfect blow and come out victorious. But you were wrong.

The demon wasted no time freeing itself of your presence before appearing behind you suddenly. Your heart had dropped, leaving you with nothing to do but hope that a fellow demon slayer would sense your distress and come to your aid. Unfortunately, that was not the case.

The foul beast beat you within an inch of your life, leaving you to drown in your own blood. You cried as you lay there, unable to move. Your life had been short, but you were willing to accept it as it was and move on to the next one. Everything faded to black slowly, and you heard the sound of oxides speaking over you as you lost consciousness. You recalled smiling at the sound. They sounded like angels.

Approximately three days later, you awoke. You didn’t recognize the room you were in, which put you in edge. Bandages covered numerous wounds scattered across your body, an observation that led to you noticing your uniform top was missing. Thankfully you still had the bottoms on, or else you would’ve felt incredibly uncomfortable. You groaned in pain as you sat up. Your head was spinning.

“We thought you wouldn’t make it.” A gentle, feminine voice spoke. You turned to look at the speaker, your eyes landing on the most beautiful woman you had ever seen. Her skin was pale and glossy, her eyes an alluring shade of purple. She was elegant. She was an angel. Behind her stood a slightly shorter man. While he too was beautiful, you noticed that he looked far from pleased at your survival. The woman saw you avert your gaze and followed it, giving the man a stern look before turning back to you. “You may call me Tamayo,” she paused, “and he is Yushiro. Would you mind telling us about yourself, demon slayer?”

“How do you know I’m a…” you trailed off and sighed. Of course. They must be demon slayers themselves if they recognized your uniform. “I don’t really have anything notable to say about myself. I joined the Demon Slayer Corps in hopes of being able to do something with my life. Before that it’s all mundane,” you frowned and swung your legs over the side of the bed. You winced as your feet hit the floor. If only you had died. You would’ve spared these people the trouble of looking after you. You met Tamayo’s gaze. “Are you affiliated with the Corps?”

She hesitated, stuttering slightly before simply smiling at you. “Why don’t you join us out here for some tea,” she suggested. Her response confused you, but you nodded nonetheless. She and Yushiro left, giving you some time to explore the room you were in. Your uniform top was folded neatly atop a nearby chair. You reached out and grabbed it. The thing must’ve been torn to shreds by that demon, seeing as there were many different colored patches decorating it. You sighed and slipped it on over your head.

Your body ached with each move you made, yet you persisted. Slowly, you made it out of the room and into the hallway. You followed the sounds of voices to an open room that appeared to be the main room. Tamayo had her hands folded neatly in her lap as she spoke to Yushiro, who had his legs crossed and his hands resting on his knees. He gave you a disgusted look before continuing his chat with Tamayo.

Hesitantly, you sat down with them, resting your legs neatly to the side. Tamayo turned to look at you before taking a deep breath. “You asked us if we were affiliated with the Corps in any way. To tell you the truth, we are. We know of them and they know of us.” Yushiro scoffed. “But we ourselves are not demon slayers. We are demons that exist freely of Muzan Kibutsuji’s control.” Your eyes widened. You had no clue that such a thing was possible. “We mean you no harm, truly. Our goals align with those of the Demon Slayer Corps.”

She gave you a second to process the information. You had so many questions, but you feared being rude. Sensing this, she gestured for you to go on. “How did you break free of his curse?” You were immediately answered by an annoyed sigh from Yushiro.

“Such a foolish question! Do not ask Lady Tamayo such things!” He glared at you.

“Yushiro. It is only right for them to ask questions. Don’t shun them,” she paused, mulling over her next words. “I spent many years trying to free myself of Muzan’s control. But it wasn’t until I was spared by a very kind man that I was freed. Since then, I have dedicated my life to the study of both demon and human biology,” she hung her head slightly, averting her gaze. You could tell by her tone that she was thankful to have been spared. It nearly brought tears to your eyes.

“What about Yushiro? Was he not a servant of Muzan too?” You asked slowly, tilting your head. Yushiro crossed his arms and looked away, biting his tongue to avoid making Tamayo upset.

“Ah… Yushiro. He had a chronic illness that kept him bedridden for years. His condition would worsen each day I was taking care of him. He was practically dying before my eyes. I gave him the choice to go on living that way, or to be cured and live longer as a demon. There weren’t any promises I could make him about the treatment’s effectiveness, but I couldn’t bear to watch him suffer.” You listened in awe. She was so sweet, and you thought that it was the most amazing thing.

“So you…” were a human. You looked at Yushiro. These two beings before you had rejected their existences as demons and chose to aid humans instead. It really was quite wonderful. “You two… are amazing.” Tamayo’s eyes widened at your words. She seems taken aback by your honesty. Yushiro seemed equally as stunned, his eyes briefly looking over at you. After all, it was rare that they weren’t treated like the monsters that they were.

“Why… thank you.” Tamayo smiled softly, a light hearted expression gracing her features.

Over time you began to heal. The everlasting soreness in your body had finally begun to fade, which allowed you to help out around the house. Tamayo had gone out and bought you a casual yukata so you wouldn’t constantly be in your uniform. You wore it whenever it was clean to show her how much you appreciated it. Oh she was so sweet to you. Yushiro too. Since the time you had first joined them, he had really warmed up to your being there.

The two of you would often go out together and pick herbs for Tamayo. He knew all of the right places to look, and how to tell if what he was looking for was ripe or not. You admired his knowledge on the topic, often remarking on his experience when you were out. Every now and then he’d show you what you should look for, but you were mainly just there to provide some form of protection if the need arose. Not that you didn’t think he was capable of protecting himself— it’s just that Tamayo stated that it would be better if you went out and kept watch for him.

This time was just like the last, but only in the sense that you were on the lookout for other demons while he was working. It seemed that recently your feelings toward him had changed. He had grown close enough to you to tell you about his feelings for Tamayo, and you had grown close enough to him to realize that you had fallen for him. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. It just made things a little awkward for you.

“Here. Hold this,” he huffed as he shoved an armful of the plants into your arms. “Lady Tamayo said that she needed a lot this time,” he mumbled to himself. You nodded with a sigh. He admired her so much, and she only saw him as a friend. It was comical when you didn’t think about the pain that it caused him. In many ways, you and him were similar. But you knew he didn’t want to compare himself to a mortal being such as yourself.

“What else did she say she needed?” You asked, peering over the heap of herbs in your arms to look at him. He had frozen in place, his eyes narrowed. “What is it?” You whispered, now on edge. Instinctively, you reached out for your sword, dropping the herbs in the process.

In the blink of an eye, Yushiro pushed you to the side and blocked an attack from the demon that he had assumed was following you through the forest. He groaned as he fought it off, wincing at the relentless assault. You quickly rose to your feet, katana in hand, and leaped at the monster. You managed to cut its head off with one swift movement.

“Are you alright?” He asked, quickly turning to look at you. His hands grasped your cheeks, moving your face around to see if you were hurt in any way. The action caused your face to flush. Yushiro noticed that your face had gotten slightly warmer, taking his hands away and giving you a confused look before turning and picking up the herbs.

“Can I… tell you something?” You asked slowly, attempting to aid him. He moved away from you and muttered a sharp ‘no’.

The walk home was spent in awkward silence. Maybe he’d realized how you felt about him. Maybe not. You weren’t sure, and it bothered you horribly. He kept his distance from you, his head turned so he wouldn’t have an opportunity to glance at you. It broke your heart. In such a short amount of time, he had begun to mean everything to you, and yet, you were nothing. He’d push you to the side and focus on Tamayo, you were sure.

And you were right. In the days following that little incident, he avoided you. He went out by himself everywhere and hardly spoke to you when he passed by. It pained you more than you had thought, seeing as Tamayo could sense your hurt. She sighed as she stood outside of your room. Emotions to her were like a wavelength that she could visualize. What you were feeling was strong enough to suffocate her. It only made her worry about you.

“Can I come in?” She asked slowly, knocking gently on the door. You mumbled a response and she walked in. “Is everything between you and Yushiro alright?” She sat down next to you on your bed, her concerned eyes meeting yours.

“Yeah. Everything’s fine. We just ran into a demon the other day, so it’s got him shaken,” you frowned, turning your head away from her. You could feel your lip quiver. Just thinking about it made your heart ache. After a few more seconds of sitting there, you sighed. There was a possibility that she could help you through your emotions. You turned back to face her, your tone slightly wistful. “I think I love him, Tamayo. There’s no realistic way for me to tell him or even be with him because he’s not human, but I feel so strongly for him in a way that I’ve never felt about anyone before…” you hung your head.

“I see…” she trailed off. There wasn’t really any form of advice she could offer you and she felt bad. “Don’t fault him for not knowing his emotions well enough to properly respond. He may not fully come around, but he will want to start being around you again,” she placed a gentle hand on your shoulder. “Just give it time.” You nodded, biting the inside of your cheek as you thought.

Just give it time.

But you didn’t have the time he did. You were doomed to die much sooner than he could ever dream of.

Tamayo left you alone with your thoughts. Of course you wanted to listen to her, but you knew it would be best if you didn’t. There was no sense in waiting when he had his heart set on Tamayo. And that hurt you more than anything. You laid back onto your bed, frowning.

Just give it time.

MITSURI

For years you had been a hashira alongside Mitsuri. Rengoku had trained you both when you joined the corps, but even then you had known her prior to serving in the corps. The whole reason you became a demon slayer was because she wanted to. She just didn’t want to go through it alone, which was fair. While Rengoku had taught you his breathing technique, neither you nor Mitsuri had resonated strongly with it. You made the choice to invent your own technique called ‘ice breathing,’ and she followed suit. Together, you made your way up the ranks and became hashiras.

It seemed that you did everything together.

If she were assigned a mission, she’d drag you along with her. If she wanted to go out to town, then she’d ask you if you wanted to go. Even your estates were in the same village. You really just couldn’t escape her.

It didn’t bother you much though. She was your friend, after all.

But you couldn’t help but want more. You had wanted more with her for such a long time you felt you were beginning to lose your mind.

There had been many times where you had gotten her alone to confess, but each time was interrupted by her crow calling her out to take care of something. Each of the hashira could see that you had fallen for Mitsuri, with the exception of Obanai. He had steered clear of everyone as soon as he gained the title of hashira. You on the other hand, had not. Tengen had been a good friend of yours outside of Mitsuri.

Actually, he had been the one talking you through the whole process. He claimed that since he had three wives, he was the right guy to ask. Because of this, you found yourself in many odd situations in the name of love. Unfortunately, Mitsuri just didn’t notice. She had always been told that she was undesirable because of her appearance, and yet, she was the most beautiful woman you’d ever seen.

You had a plan this time. A plan that was slightly guaranteed to work. Even if it didn’t work in your favor, it’d still work. You’d get her alone under the stars and propose. Yes, propose. Marriage amongst hashira wasn’t really accepted, due to the circumstances of the title, but no one had to know. As long as you had her you’d be happy.

“So what’re you going to do when you get her alone?” Tengen asked, attempting to lift up your spirits. He’d promised to keep the whole thing a secret, which you’d greatly appreciated. You couldn’t have been more thankful for his help. Especially now that you were so in need of it.

“I’m going to take her hands, look into her eyes and tell her how I feel!” You nodded, your expression serious. All of this seemed rather silly, but his enthusiasm was making you feel better.

“That’s right! And what’s she going to do?” He wrapped a large, beefy arm around your shoulder, pulling you close to him with a grin. You chuckled and pushed him away.

“Yes!” You paused, looking away in embarrassment. “This feels stupid,” you sighed, shaking your head. “Why are we doing this again?”

“We’re doing this so you won’t back out at the last minute,” he raised a brow as he looked at you. His hands landed on his hips. Why was this grown man full of such sassiness? You rolled your eyes.

“I’m not going to back out!” You argued, but to no avail. Tengen mocked you with his hand, a smirk growing on his lips.

“I mean, if it doesn’t work out you can always marry me,” the taller man spit out nonchalantly. His words caused you to choke on air. You gave him a look, feigning disgust as you stared at him.

“Yeah no, I’ll pass,” you shuddered at the thought.

“I’m just saying.”

You sighed once more, looking out at the scenery. The sun was beginning to set, which meant that you would soon be alone with Mitsuri. The thought both scared and excited you. After all, you’d finally get the chance to tell her a secret that you’ve kept for so long. Even if she didn’t feel the same, at least you’d get the satisfaction that came with finally having your question answered.

The stars shined brightly overhead, perfectly visible from the tree you had chosen to sit under. Mitsuri would be arriving any moment now. Any moment. Your heart rate only increased as the seconds passed. Tonight was different from all of your other attempts, but only in the sense that you were asking to be bound to her forever. Well, either way you’d be with her, but you wanted to be with her.

“There you are!” Your friend cheerily called out, grinning as she sat next to you. “I’m so sorry I was late! Iguro gifted me these pretty green socks and treated me to some sweets afterward! They were the most delicious sweets I’d ever had!” She giggled gleefully at the thought. “Oh if only you had been there! Did you know that Iguro is actually a sweetie? Oh he’s such a sweetie! And he’s cute, too! I had to refrain from blushing the whole time, it was so embarrassing!” She continued to giggle, trailing off when she remembered that it was you that had asked her to join you. Her face flushed and she looked up at the sky. “So how come you wanted to hang out all the way out here?”

You swallowed, hanging your head in shame. Of course. Obanai. Your heart ached as you sat next to her. She had said he was cute, but that didn’t mean anything, did it? She said that about everyone she liked. Your hands clutched your slayer uniform. This was foolish of you. There was no way you had thought that you stood a chance at getting with Mitsuri. It was almost laughable. You had no idea how Tengen entertained the idea for so long.

“Hello…?” She leaned forward and waved her hand in front of your face. The motion pulled you from your thoughts, causing you to jump slightly. “Ah! There’s my friend! I was starting to think I’d lost you!” She smiled widely and giggled once again.

“My apologies,” you forced a nervous chuckle, your face flushing a light shade of pink. Thankfully she didn’t notice. “I didn’t mean to zone out on you.” Your heart pounded. You needed to leave as soon as possible. You couldn’t bear to be around her in this moment. It was hurting you. “I actually had something I wanted to talk to you about—“

“Caw! Head west to the nearest town! Caw! Get moving! Get moving!” Mitsuri’s crow called out. Its raspy voice ruined the moment entirely, making you frown. Your friend rose to her feet quickly, giving you a sympathetic look.

“Would you like to join me?” She asked sweetly, but you declined. “Alright! I’m going to go find Iguro and see if he wants to go! I’ll see you later, friend!” You waved, giving her a soft smile as she ran off. As soon as she was no longer in your line of sight, you ran to find Tengen. He’d promised you that he’d stay in the area for your sake, a promise that you really hadn’t expected to see through.

You ran, your breathing heavy and your heart heavier. You cursed yourself mentally for being so stupid. Actually, you were mid swear when Tengen stumbled upon you.

“Woah there! I’m guessing that things didn’t go well?” You shot him a glare before simply breaking down. He took a step back, unsure of how to handle the situation. Of course he’s comforted people before, but that didn’t mean that things like this didn’t catch him off guard. After a few seconds of watching you cry in silence, he stepped forward and hugged you. In all actuality, he had thought that you had this in the bag. He really saw no reason as to why you wouldn’t.

You never really explained things to him until the next day, which even then you were reluctant to do. Of course he had told you that you should go out for it again, but you disagreed. Obanai made her giddy in a way that you felt you couldn’t, so you saw no point in competing.

Things would be easier if you just stayed her friend.

OBANAI

Days turned into weeks that turned into months. Soon those months would turn into years. You had been staying at the home of Shinobu Kocho for ages now due to an injury you had received while you were away on a mission. The demon had nearly taken off your arm, breaking several of your bones in the process. Thankfully, you were able to kill if before it could kill you, but it resulted in you calling for aid.

Only a handful of your fellow demon slayers had set aside time to visit you, including your close friend and fellow hashira Gyomei. Each time he visited you he wound up sobbing, praising you for your resilience and bravery. He cared a lot for you, and your recent incident had caused him to worry about you more than usual. He had even set aside missions to help Shinobu take care of you. He was a true friend.

Aside from him, only one other hashira had come to visit you. Iguro Obanai.

Obanai was someone that you didn’t really know all too well, despite both reaching the rank of hashira at the same time. You had always been friendly with him, of course, but it never really went farther than that. You thought of him as alluring and slightly mysterious. His silence intrigued you, as did his mask and his snake. He was an enigma in your eyes.

With your curiosity arose some issues. The deeper you dove into his history, the more you found yourself longing to get to know him. You couldn’t even think about him normally without getting slightly flustered, which upset you. After all, your feelings towards him were rooted in your curiosity, nothing more.

“How are you doing today, my friend?” Gyomei’s voice met your ears. He ducked as he entered the room, walking over and sitting on the chair next to your bed.

“Not too bad, actually,” you grinned, “I was able to walk around the corridor earlier! You should’ve been there! I didn’t even need help standing!” You chuckled softly and Gyomei smiled softly. Tears began to slide down his cheeks as he faced you.

“You are so strong! I’m so happy for you!” He clasped his hands together, tilting his head back dramatically. You rolled your eyes, smiling. “I hope that you continue to do well!” Your smile only grew at his enthusiasm. He was sweet, that was for sure.

“Gyomei, I’ve got a question for you,” you asked slowly, waiting for him to calm down some.

“What is it, dear friend?”

You shifted in your bed, suddenly feeling nervous. “What do you know about Obanai? I know it’s odd, but I can’t help but be curious. I don’t really know too much about him. Though, now that I think about it, you probably don’t either. He doesn’t talk much,” you sigh, chuckling softly. He was confusing, that much was true.

“I know only what I’ve been told,” your friend paused, “which is very little. I’m apologize, friend,” he rose to his feet, his hands still clasped together. “I will make time to visit you again next week. I cannot wait to see how much better you are doing then!” He smiled once more before leaving.

Your time alone was brief. The door closed, only to open again, revealing the man that you had just asked about. All you could do was offer him a smile. He walked forward some and sat, looking at you for a few seconds before audibly taking a deep breath.

“How are you?” He asked bluntly. The snake around his neck eyed you, its tongue reaching in your direction.

“I’m just as good as I was yesterday,” you tease but he doesn’t react. Talking to him is like talking to a rock. “They had me walking down the hallway earlier, which means that I should be doing more by the end of the week, though, it just depends on what Shinobu has to say about my condition.” You smiled. He was really good at getting you to ramble so he could avoid conversation. You found it funny, in a way. He’d rather listen to you speak than have to talk.

“Here, I brought you this,” he reached forward, revealing a brand new haori. You gasped at the sight. It looked just like the one you had lost when you got injured. Grinning, you took it from his hands and held it in the air to get a better look. Its resemblance to your old one was impressive. You hugged it and giggled.

“How did you get this?” You look up at him. His face looks slightly flushed, but you think nothing of it.

“I heard that you didn’t have your old one anymore. I know a seamstress in the town over, so I commissioned her to make you a new one.” He wasn’t about to tell you that he had memorized the patterns from observing you so often. No, that sounded weird. He was hoping that you wouldn’t question him any further.

“Thank you, Obanai. I really appreciate your gift.” You looked down at the haori, playing with the fabric between your fingers. Hopefully you’d be able to wear it soon.

After that, Obanai began to miss days. Once he had come in with Mitsuri, which hurt you to see. They looked happy together, so you couldn’t really be too upset, but it did bother you some. Each time he stopped by, he seemed to be less talkative than before, which you didn’t know could happen. With each day he missed, you seemed to be getting better. Within a week, you were able to go out on small missions in the nearest town. A few days after that, you were finally back to your regular routine.

Shinobu had discharged you from her infirmary, which meant that you finally got to return to your own estate. With everything going on, you had yet to stop and check in with Gyomei. You felt bad about it, but you couldn’t just skip out on these missions. There had been so much in your area that you hadn’t been able to take care of, and you needed to get to work on it.

“Caw! Head east, head east! Caw!” Your crow’s cries echoed into the air. Its shrill voice never failed to make you cringe. “Dangerous! Backup will be there! Caw!” You sighed and continued on. Hopefully it would be Gyomei.

You reached the area, looking out at the dark forest that threatened you. You couldn’t help but wonder what had hidden itself in there that was considered dangerous enough for you, a hashira, to need backup.

The sound of footsteps caused you to draw your blade, pointing its edge at the culprit. Obanai didn’t even jump, looking at you with his hetrochromatic eyes. He seemed surprised to see you already out in the field, wearing the haori he got you, no less. His face flushed slightly and he pushed past you, hoping you didn’t notice.

“Sorry about that. I’m a little on edge,” you admitted, sheathing your blade and catching up to him. “I didn’t know you were in the area.”

“Pure coincidence.”

“Right…” you eyed him before nodding. “So how’s everything back at the headquarters? I know you live relatively close to it. How are the others?”

“They’re all fine.”

“Gyomei too?”

“Gyomei too.” His tone got slightly more bitter at the mention of Gyomei, something that nearly went over your head. You froze, giving him a confused look.

“Do you not like Gyomei?” You tilted your head, your brows furrowing.

“I find him to be very respectable.” He paused. “… how do you feel about Mitsuri?” His question only confused you more.

“She’s a great slayer, and really sweet. I like her,” you caught up to him once again. “Why…?”

“Are you and Gyomei engaged?” He blurted out, turning to look at you. You were caught so off guard by his gaze that you took a step back.

“Of course not! He and I are just close friends! I thought everyone knew that.” Well clearly not everyone knew that. You cleared your throat, looking out around you for any signs of danger. Weird. You weren’t sensing anything. “What’s all of this about?”

“Nothing, I—“ he cut himself off, continuing on with his walk. He stopped again and turned back to face you. “Mitsuri and I aren’t engaged either.”

He turned back around, not wasting any time heading deeper into the forest. Your body was frozen in confusion. That whole interaction was weird. You shook it off and ran after him.

You couldn’t help but feel better now that you knew about him and Mitsuri, though. Yes it was weird, but it had bothered you since he had stopped coming around. Truth be told, you had fallen for him not long after he had begun his daily visits. The fact that he cared enough to give you his attention daily made you feel like you were special, and you liked that. Who wouldn’t?

Once he came back into sight, you slowed down, making sure he was aware that it was you instead of a demon. You rested your hand on the hilt of your katana, following him in silence. That’s how the rest of the mission was spent, in silence. The two of you never really found the supposed dangerous demon, but you didn’t mind. At least now you could rest easy knowing that you stood a slight chance with your fellow hashira.

LADY TAMAYO

For as long as you could remember, you had been under the care of Lady Tamayo and her assistant Yushiro. Your life prior to joining them was a memory that eluded you. No matter how hard you tried, you just couldn’t remember how you had met them. They had tried to explain it all to you before, but it never made sense. Demons? Demon slayers? It all sounded like a fairy tale.

Tamayo had entrusted you with taking care of the garden out behind the house, a duty you had accepted happily. You enjoyed watering the various herbs. Their lives were just as valuable as yours, and you made sure to treat them with as much tenderness as you could.

Every now and then Tamayo would come and help you, but that was rare. She usually spent her time inside, studying away at human biology. It interested you some, but you knew better than to interrupt her.

When Tamayo wasn’t available, you’d spend your time with Yushiro. He never really got a say in the matter, but thankfully he had learned to stop protesting a while ago. The two of you were walking down the streets of the town the house was hidden in. Despite it being late, there were many vendors that were still open. Their resilience intrigued you. You reached out and tugged on Yushiro’s sleeve, smiling softly.

“Do you think that Lady Tamayo would like this?” You asked, holding up an intricate painting of a woman looking at the moon. Yushiro looked at it, his eyes widening slightly. He was impressed by the strokes on the canvas. Tamayo was fond of art, so of course she would like it, but Yushiro didn’t want her to favor you more than she did him. He crossed his arms.

“Get it. But make sure to tell her that I helped you pick it out,” he said stubbornly before turning to walk once more.

Eagerly, you bought the painting, carrying it under your arm as you followed Yushiro. He stopped suddenly, holding his head in his hand. You recognized this behavior, grabbing his shoulder and leading him off to the side and sitting him down. He looked pale than usual, and you sighed.

“When was the last time you ate?” You asked, setting the painting to the side gently. The man only grunted in response, pouting as he avoided your concerned gaze.

“… last week…” he mumbled.

“Last week?! You know you’re not supposed to go that long without food!” You panicked and looked around. Nobody could see you. With a huff, you scooted towards him. “Listen, you can feed off of me just this once. It’s too risky to have you roaming the streets while starved,” you sighed, “you must’ve felt like you were going insane! Oh come here…” you pulled down the shoulder of your kimono, revealing more skin than you would’ve liked. Yushiro eyed you. The thought of eating even a bit of your flesh scared him. What if Tamayo found out? What would she think of him?

“Hurry up!” You whispered through your teeth, giving him a glare. He was taking way too long to make up his mind. Unfortunately, you didn’t have time. He sighed and leaned forward, taking a bite out of your skin.

About five minutes later, the two of you returned to the town. He seemed to be in a better mood now, which was good. You just couldn’t believe that he was walking around while hungry like that. Things would’ve been bad if he had snapped.

“Hey Yushiro?”

“What?”

“Do you think Lady Tamayo likes anyone?” You asked as you readjusted the painting. It was random, but you couldn’t help but be curious. His cheeks flushed a rosy pink and he sighed.

“I don’t think so. She’s too focused on doing her duties to set aside time for things like romance,” he frowned slightly as he spoke.

“Hey Yushiro?”

“What?”

“I think I like Lady Tamayo.” Your words made him choke on nothing. He hadn’t expected that in the slightest.

“You and me both…” he mumbled, leading you back to the house.

Tamayo loved the painting, choosing to hang it at the end of the hallway. Every time she saw you she made sure to thank you for the thoughtful present. Her compliments made you giddy, usually causing your face to flush a little.

You felt that your feelings for her only got stronger with each day that passed. Hell, you couldn’t even think of her without getting butterflies in your stomach. It was beginning to get in the way of your work. On times she’d come out to the garden to help you, you wouldn’t be able to speak. You were sure that if you said something, you’d butcher it so badly that you’d have to ask Yushiro to end your misery.

You sighed as you pulled another weed from the ground near the garden. The herbs were looking great, despite it being their off season. The luscious green plants surrounded you. They were nearly big enough to hide you completely, and you took great pride in that fact.

“Hey, are you ready to go out? Lady Tamayo said that she needed some time alone for a while.” Yushiro’s voice caused you to perk up. You nodded and gave him a smile.

“Hold on! I need to change real quick!” You stood up and went inside to your room. It didn’t take you long before you were standing in front of Yushiro, asking him what the plan was for tonight.

“Let’s stay in town.”

“Alright.”

There weren’t as many shops open tonight, unfortunately, so you and Yushiro just took to heading towards the park in the middle of the town. It was a small park, but that didn’t stop it from being beautiful. You sighed as you sat down onto the grass. A part of you wished to find another gift for Tamayo, but your options were limited.

You looked up at the moon, taking in its glory in silence before turning back to your friend.

“Does your love for Lady Tamayo ever cause you pain?” You asked.

“Sometimes.”

“Sometimes?”

“Yeah.”

A part of you understood what he meant. Sometimes she was so beautiful that it caused your heart to throb in agony. Maybe it was because you knew that she would never be yours. Either way, your giddy love for her was beginning to torment your weary soul. You didn’t enjoy being around her simply due to the fact that her sweet words wouldn’t fail to cause you some sort of pain.

“Yeah…” you repeated, sighing once more.

[bodybahng]

one of those days - drabble/soft thought

word count: 0.4k

pairing: bang chan x gender neutral reader

warnings: depressed reader, hurt/comfort, a tiny bit suggestive at the end

a/n: just a comforting little piece i wrote for my angel @threeopossumsinacoat 🤍🫂

if you are a minor or an ageless blog and interact with my content, you will be blocked.

masterlist

“baby?” chan called into the quiet apartment. he was sure you’d told him you’d get home earlier from work, but you weren’t relaxing in the living room as usual.

he hung his coat and walked to the kitchen, not finding you there either. the last place he checked was the bedroom, seeing you lying on your side.

joining you, he helped you turn around and that’s when he noticed you were crying. “baby, hey… what’s wrong?”

you couldn’t speak, the tears falling freely as so many thoughts swirled in your head, your chest feeling tight. he pulled you to snuggle into him and drew patterns on your arm while softly holding your head against his chest.

silence filled the room, only being interrupted by the occasional sobs that slowly turned into hiccups as you started calming down. the feeling of his heartbeat helped you to even your breathing and come back to the present, your hand relaxing from where you had been gripping his shirt.

“i love you, i’m here for you, okay?” he said quietly, pressing a kiss to the top of your head before moving to your temple. “if you want to talk, i’ll listen. if you don’t, i’ll also take care of you.”

a coughing fit followed your attempt to talk, throat hoarse from how long you had been in this state prior to his arrival. “it’s just… it’s one of those days, you know?”

chan nodded, and you noticed him pouting involuntarily, which made you chuckle lovingly.

“i get it, life’s tough and our brains are mean, right?” he said, receiving another hiccup from you as a response. “it won’t always be this way, but every time things get tough, you know you can lean on me.”

“i know, thank you, channie,” you replied, lifting your head to give him a quick peck. “can you just… help me turn my brain off? just for today, i’m really tired of feeling this way.”

“of course, baby. first, let’s make sure you have some food and water, then we’ll come back here so i can make you forget for a bit and we’ll shower and cuddle after. how does that sound?” he held your chin as he spoke, finishing his sentence with a kiss.

“that’s exactly what i need right now. thank you for being here, i love you a lot.”

you didn’t know how you got so lucky to find someone like chan, but you were extremely thankful for it. you couldn’t always give him the same amount as he could give you, just like sometimes he also couldn’t and you were the one to compensate. you two knew and honoured the true definition of a partnership.

[adonisbeloveds]

Hmm, how about a genshin story with a child god of Teyvat? I honestly can't think of any character(s) who should be in there, so I think I'll let you decide. I really like your writing, so I can't be disappointed. 👁👁

Genshin Characters with a child god of Teyvat

-Reader: They/them + no gender implied -They/them for Traveler -He/him for Dottore -They/it for Albedo -He/it/they for Baizhu

Requested: No/Yes

Warnings: None Disclamer: Characters personality, looks, ect may be different from canon due to either hc or author has just forgotten.

A/N: I am so happy that you like my writing! This one is also a pretty long one but I hope you like it! I picked some of my fav characters for this and had a lot of fun writing for them :D

^ Made by me

-⚔️ The Traveler and Paimon were just wandering around sumeru when they got called to meet up with Nahida. When they both made it to nahida they saw her talking to a child who looked like they were half listening and half paying attention to they toys they were playing with. -⚔️ After Paimon made their presents known Nahida walked towards them and started explaining why they were here, she explained that the god of teyvat was here and asked if they could protect and care for them after explaining that the child was the god of teyvat and being such a young child they are defensless and even though she is sure no one would hurt them people cough the fatui cough might try to take them. -⚔️ The Traveler agreed straight away and went to talk to you, after some talking with each other the Traveler picked you up as you three said goodbye to Nahida and made your way to the place the Traveler and Paimon were staying for the meantime. -⚔️ Paimon loved playing with you and your toys, you were just so cute and calming to be around, you two also ate lots of food together. You guys were almost like siblings and the Traveler was like your parent!

"Okay you two, we will be going to the market to get some things okay? go get your shoes on little light and wait near the door okay?" you nodded and ran to go put your shoes on. After a little while of you rocking back and forth the Traveler and Paimon came to the door and you three went off. The traveler was looking at different stalls when they heard the sound of you screaming, they looked over to see a fatui agent trying to drag you away from the market, as soon as they were about to run over the whole ground shook and Paimon held onto the Traveler, they looked over to see you were sitting down and crying with the fatui agent no were to bee seen, not even thinking twice the Traveler ran over and scooped you up in their arms and started comforting you. After they were finished and your crying turned into small sniffles they laughed softly "thats a new one huh? thats the perks of being the god of teyvat I guess"

^ Made by me

-🧪 When all the fatui got called by the Tsaritsa they weren't expecting to be told that the god of teyvat was found and one of them are going to take care of them. -🧪 Thats when Dottore found out that he was going to take care of the god, the god thats a child at that and I mean even he was confused that they were trusting him with a child but yet again he would never think of hurting you. -🧪 He picked you up after bowing to the Tsaritsa and left to his office, contacting pantalone to get you some toys, coloring books and everything else you wanted. -🧪 He never did experiments while you were in the room and always called Pantalone to take you out whenever he was going to do experiments.

"Dot! Dot! look what I drew! its us and Mr Pantalone!" you squealed as you ran into his office and showing him your drawing, he smiled and patted you on the head as you giggled softly "that looks amazing my little god, have you shown Mr Pantalone?" he asked pausing his report on his new experiment and turning his attention to you, you shook your head "well you should go show him huh?" you gasped and quickly nodded running out of his office and making your way to pantalones office. It has been a few hours scence you came and showed Dottore your drawing and he was just thinking you were deciding to spend time with Pantalone when he heard screaming that sounded like your voice, quickly he stood up from his desk and was about to run to the door when it slammed open to show 2 new fatui agents holding you. Dottore marched over with a dark auror around him and commanded them to drop you, after they did you quickly got up and ran to him hugging his leg and crying into his pants, he picked you up and softly comforted you while usally he wouldn't show this side infront of fatui agents these ones wouldn't last long enough to step out of the room. After you calmed down and fell asleep in his arms he called Pantalone and he took you from Dottore, meanwhile the two new agents knew that they messed up big time and that this would be the last time they ever got to live. No one hurts you and gets away with it while your in Dottores care.

^ Made by me

-🎨 Albedo was looking at different papers when Klee ran into the house dragging another kid with her, she started rambling but they were able to make out the important parts such as you being the god of teyvat and that Amber found you when she was out and brought you too the favonius knights and that Klee took you. -🎨 Albedo smiled softly and crouched down infront of you and asked if you were okay staying with it and Klee, you nodded and hugged him. -🎨 Albedo soon informed the knights that they would be taking care of you and that you will be staying at their house. While it was telling the knights that Klee decided to show you her bombs! -🎨 You mostly stayed inside the house helping Albedo with paper work and cooking, when your not in the house your running around with Klee and blowing fish up and covering Klee up so she doesn't get introuble!

Albedo tried not to laugh and only let out small snickers at seeing you on your tippy toes trying to see over the tall desk to see what it was drawing, after enough of your suffering you pouted and turned around looking up at Albedo with puppy eyes and grabby hands, shaking his head while smiling he picked you up and placed you on his lap and you looked with sparkles in your eyes at the drawing they did. They got you some paper and crayons and you started your own art with your tongue slightly poked out showing your concentration. A couple hours later you you were finished and lifted it up to show albedo "look! look!" you squealed while showing your finished drawing of it, Klee and you as a family! Albedo smiled softly and picked you up making its way to the kitchen "that's amazing my little artist! why don't you hang it on the fridge and grab some stuff for dinner?" you nodded and slid out of their grip, running over to the fridge and hanging the drawing up. After Klee got home you all cooked dinner together like the small found family you were!

^ Made by me

-🐍 It was like what happened with Klee and Albedo, Baizhu was looking around for his medicine when he heard Qiqi's voice calling out for them, when he turned around to greet Qiqi it saw that she had another child that looked like the god of teyvat. -🐍 After Changsheng confirmed that you were the god it took it upon themself to look after you and Qiqi, Changsheng didn't want another child running around but she could let it pass just for you. -🐍 You helped Baizhu out by getting different ingredients for medicine, putting cold towels on paitents heads, keeping Hu toa away from Qiqi whenever she tried to steal Qiqi, you were just a helpful little assistant! -🐍 Qiqi also loved having a sibling around to keep her company and to keep the Hu toa lady away from her, she once intruduced you to coco goat milk and you loved it!

"Itss been quiet for a while hassn't it Baizhu?" Changsheng said while watching Baizhu write down a letter to a paitents family telling them that the paitent was okay and healthy "mm, it has been quiet hasn't it? I'll go check on the kids" they got up and left the room, slowly shutting the door behind him so it doesn't wake the person up and making his way to the place they sent you and Qiqi to collect some glaze lilies. When Baizhu made it they didn't see you two at first glance but after looking around it saw you and Qiqi making little flower crowns out of the glaze lilies, smiling they made their way towards you too and sat down "what happened to collecting glaze lilies you two?" he asked with a smirk on its face, you just smiled and started giggling "but we made flower crowns for you and Changsheng!" you got up and plopped a flower crown on his head and a smaller one on Changshengs head. You squealed and started laughing when Baizhu grabbed you and started tickling your sides "this is payback for making me worried little assistant!" you couldn't stop laughing as you fell into Baizhus lap, Qiqi running over and plopping into their lap too.

[fire-lizard-ro]

Ah yes. I've come to inquire about a certain blond fellow with the pretty eyes. Aventurine

So here's my bit. Reader is going through a break up with Aventurine and then they make up. I'm writing this while attention (females perspective)is playing in my mind. Maybe you could like incorporate it into the ask. Because I'm thinking in a way that the reader is trying to get Aventurines attention whilst keeping him at a distance. Sor of cat and mouse. And he's buying into it though he's much prefer without the sneakiness.

Also I hope this asks finds you in good spirits and a joyful mood. Caio.

Okay, okay- I have no clue what attention is. A song? I’m not good at this game help-

Anyways I will try my best.

Thank you sm for the ask. 🫶

I really do love this twinky little blond man and I’m happy to be writing about him.

It’s like two in the morning rn and I’m rambling here to distract myself from things. ANY!!! WAYS!!!

No gender is mentioned for the reader.

CW: exactly one (1) 2.1 spoiler (Aventurine’s real name- It’s at the very end), break up-make up time, mild angst bc ofc there is it’s Aventurine, hurt/comfort, happy ending hehe 🫶

Writing under the cut (SFW):

You couldn’t help but smile as you saw a certain someone’s nickname flashing across your screen. Right on time.

Though you supposed he knew what you were doing. After all, Aventurine is smart. Even if he didn’t realize it right away, he had to know by now.

You picked up the phone.

“Well hello, stranger. To what do I owe the honor?” It was hard to keep the sly lilt and inflection out of your voice when you knew he was definitely gripping his phone tightly on the other end of the line.

“I’m sure you know, dear. You’re slick but not that slick. You’ll have to do better than that to outplay me,” Aventurine said, his voice still fixed in that unhurried cadence and unbothered tone like usual despite the situation.

You rested your cheek on a hand and leaned back in your seat with a smile. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean. In any case, it’s a bit odd of you to call me. After all, we did break up. You remember that, I’m sure.”

You could practically hear the leather of his gloves crunching (is it crunching I forgot-) as he clenched a fist, keeping hold of his restraint.

The two of you had been dancing around each other like cat and mouse. Though at this point, who was the cat and who was the mouse was anyone’s guess.

Despite having gotten to the point of breaking up, you ended up missing him a lot. And thus you began the dance only to find his hand already waiting for you. It was unspoken that you both wanted the same thing. But every time he drew closer, you’d pull back. A frustrating back and forth that seemed to confuse him. Aventurine was sure you wanted him back. And yet you never let the cat finally catch his prey. Why? He didn’t get it.

“Oh sweetheart- Let’s not keep pretending, yes? I know you’ve been trying to catch my attention. You can’t hide your intentions.”

“Seems it’s working, then.”

It was true. You had been doing things to keep Aventurine’s eyes on you. Despite playing a game of keep away with him with how you’d draw him in and push him away, you didn’t want him looking at anyone else. At the same time, you weren’t sure if you’d truly be willing to get together again. What if the train went off the tracks again? The first time had been rough enough with the two of you waging a passive aggressive war and pointedly ignoring each other at some points.

And thus, this odd little game of yours. One that Aventurine was growing tired of it he had finally called you.

“Let’s talk in person, shall we?” “What-?”

A knock at the door. No fucking way- You opened the door to see your favorite the blond man himself.

“Hiya, darling dearest~”

“Aventurine.”

“No need to be like that. I was serious about that talk.” He then pulled a bouquet of your favorite flowers out from behind his back. “For you,” Aventurine said with that stupid charming smirk of his. You squinted at him for a moment before accepting the flowers with a huff and a faux annoyed, “Fine.”

You were a bit conflicted. You were excited that he was here. Especially because he seemed desperate enough to actually seek you out and talk to you in person. But at the same time this was not something you calculated or expected to happen.

“I know you’re glad to see me. You don’t have to pretend,” he practically purred as you shot a glare over your shoulder, still keeping up appearances. “Oh but of course- I’m absolutely just tickled pink.”

Aventurine chuckled, tipping his head down to look at you over his shades, lids low and eyes practically glowing. “You always did have a way with words, sweetheart.”

He then took off the sunglasses (and oh that was another stupid, dorky little thing about him you found oddly endearing- shades inside a building- stupid silly adorable man-) and plopped down on your couch while you put the flowers down on the counter in the kitchen. You’d deal with them later. For now you had him to deal with. You sat in the chair instead of the couch. He pouted playfully about it, but didn’t comment. “I’ll cut to the chase- I want you back. And I know you want me back, too. I just can’t figure out why you’re leading me closer and then shoving me away. I’m starting to get the feeling you just like my attention. But even so- We both know the truth. So why don’t you just give in, lovely? I know you want to,” he said, surprisingly not using the old song and dance of leading someone around to get the information he wanted. He didn’t talk in circles and didn’t even seem all that flirty despite his words. He was… oddly serious.

“And what about the reason we broke up before?” You didn’t even try to pretend anymore. Aventurine has always been able to see right through you. That ability had clearly not gone anywhere. “I can’t make promises, but we can talk. We’ll work something out. I’ll even compromise on it.” Compromise was not an Aventurine word. Any deals he made were made in his favor without the other person even knowing what they were going to lose. Your incredulity must have been showing on your face more than you thought because he laughed lightly, the sound somehow dry- tired and heavy. “I see that look. I’m serious, baby. I’m sorry I ever let you go. You’re the only one who stayed. The only one who has stuck around. I need you. I’ll give it all to you. My attention, my trust, my… my heart, even. You don’t have to play these games to make me want you.”

Now you feel a bit guilty. But at the same time, elated. Even before you broke up, he never once brought up matters of trust and love. He seemed far too uncomfortable even edging around the topic. But now Aventurine was the first one to bring it up.

You said nothing but silently stood. And his eyes dimmed, waiting for disappointment. But then you walked over and sat next to him, pulling him into a hug. “I missed you, Aven.”

He let out a shaky sigh and wrapped you up in his embrace, arms tight around you.

“Kakavasha.”

“What?”

“You should tell me, ‘I missed you, Kakavasha,’” he (Kakavasha?) said, his voice was shaky with emotion.

“I… I missed you, Kakavasha.”

“And I love you, sweetheart.”

[yourbloodysunrise]

Hi! I was wondering if I can request 2012 Donatello where he finally manages to have enough courage to ask out reader but because he took to long reader is already dating someone? I want the angstiest angst that you can make 😇 also can it be like a Drabble or a one shot?

🌤 — ah, angst, the thing that always worse than I imagined.hope you've seen that I write soft angst, so it can be different from what you expected.here we go!

❝ Every plans has flaws.. ❞

— FANDOM: TMNT 2012

— PAIRING: DONATELLO X READER

— ROMANTIC

— READER IS GENDER NEUTRAL

— TW: BAD ENGLISH, BAD GRAMMAR, SWEARING, SOFT ANGST, OOC, DONNIE MORE ANGRY THAN UPSET, THIS IS SHORT, READER NAME NOT MENTIONED

"..And then I'll ask them to go on a date with me!It has to be the perfect plan!"

"I don't know, dude, why don't just cut out the whole evidence-finding part about the Kraangs?" — Mikey answers, spinning around in a chair in Donny's lab, not really listening to him.

Donnie loudly sighed, slowly turned to Mikey, squinting at him, looking annoyed by his question, as if the answer was obvious.

"BECAUSE I want everything to go perfectly!One small mistake can make them refuse.."

"I think you're too paranoid, just relax!Not like them already dating someone."

"..."

"..That's not the best way to calm someone down, Mikey."

"But that not bad, as try."

Donnie blankly looks at Mikey before turning away, shaking his head, — "I should have consulted with Master Splinter instead of you..Anyway, I want to make sure they agree."

"Maybe they will if you just come up and ask?I mean, you didn't try it."

"Well..You're right in some way, though..No, no, what am I thinking?!" — Donnie sighs, rubbing his temples with his fingers, looking wearily at the plan he drew of trying to ask his new passion out on a date, — "I just don't want to make a mistake, I've been trying to please them for so long that it feels like I'm pushing them away.."

"Pushing who away?" — you ask, entering the laboratory, causing a startled squeal from Donnie, hiding the plan board behind the laboratory equipment, — "Hi Mikey, hello Donnie. Sorry for not knocking, but I thought you'd hear me coming in."

"No problem-"

"None, hi, don't worry, I don't mind, everything fine!" — Donnie repeats, stuttering, a nervous and embarrassed smile graced his face, making you giggle.

Mikey glanced briefly at Donnie, winking at him and pointing at you, before taking a skateboard, standing at the entrance to the laboratory, and walking away from there shouting "booyakasha!!!"

"Hm."

"How are you doing with the Kraang search?" — you ask, approaching Donnie, leaning on the laboratory table.

"Weeeell, in the last few days I haven't been able to find any clues about where they might be, so so far the results are zero," — he says, turning away from you, rubbing his neck, staring at the floor.

Come on, Don, this is your chance. Maybe you won't have the opportunity to ask them out anymore?

He swallows the lump in his throat, feeling nervousness wash over him. He doesn't have any excuse to spend time with them..Okay, new plan. Maybe it won't hurt to try?

"Heeeyy.." — he begins, stretching out words, still gathering his thoughts, — "I need to tell you something.."

You mumble thoughtfully, interest lights up in your eyes when you lean closer to him, —"Yeah?"

He nervously swallows with excitement when you approach him, he inhales before starting.

"L-look, you can refuse, I understand you, given the circumstances of our relationship in terms of our situation.."

"Maybe we could go on a date?..Just ordinary date, where would you like to go?I know this is all unexpected, but..please?"

You stand there with your mouth open in shock before closing your jaw, staring at Donny dumbfounded with round eyes.

"O-Oh, Don.. it's.."

"Impossible."

"I'm sorry, but..I already have a partner. It's pretty awkward, you know.."

"But, hey, we're still friends, right?" — you awkwardly comfort him, trying to smile, although the only thing that comes out is a sour strained smile that tries to flinch.

You two stood in deathly silence, feeling the tension grow by the second. If it was something very embarrassing for you, then for him it felt like end of the world…

Your already weak smile completely disappeared when you saw his blank expression, you cleared your throat, preparing to talking — "Donnie?Are you okay?.."

He blinked a few times before answering in a low voice, — "Yes..Yes, I'm fine. Don't worry.."

You turned your head away with a sigh, staring at the floor, realizing that he said it just so that you wouldn't worry about him. Of course, it was probably worse for him than for you, you thought.

"I…I think I'll go." — you say quickly before turning around and leaving the lab. Donnie watched you walk all the way out, waiting for you to disappear through the door, and waiting a few more seconds to make sure you were gone before growling in annoyance.

Why?

The question arose in his head, feeling jealousy fill him, eating into his skin like poison, spreading throughout his body with a caustic feeling of envy and hatred for the whole world.

Why not him?

He collapsed into a chair, covering his face with his hands, letting out a heavy sigh. Was it useless to develop a plan from the very beginning?Or did his self doubt delay him and you managed to find a partner?Why can't luck wait at least one fucking day, so as not to ruin it for him?

He was thinking about what had just happened with a frowning face, resting his elbow on the table, and your photo caught his eye.

With an unreadable face, he picked it up, looking through it, longing seeped into his gaze at the sight of your smiling photo. Slowly, he squeezed the frame of the photo, his fingers digging into the wood with such force that he could have broken it if he really wanted to.

Everything is okay. You have made your choice. You're still friends. Everything will be fine.

Although, perhaps he could show you that he is the best choice?..

..:*･ﾟ☆.｡.:*･ﾟﾞ｡.:*･ﾟ☆.｡.:*･ﾟ🌤

🌤 — aw, my dear turtle don't deserve this :(

🌤 — ah, finally I end this.I have tried very hard and often rewritten it, also I use translator so sorry if there any mistakes.

🌤 — hope you like it!have a good day☆

[maxs-deactivated]

Old vinyls.

Pairing: Joel Miller x reader.

Summary: Joel's feelings bloomed even before the outbreak. 20 years, a lot of losses and survival later, he finally finds one of his missing pieces. A Joel Miller one shot.

A/N: bro I have NO IDEA of when I actually wrote this, I just remember it taking me a few days to finish, and I never posted it bc I tought it was bad, but now I reread this and OH MY FUCKING GOD THIS IS WONDERFUL?! Hope you guys like it as much as I did :)

Warnings: hurt/comfort, crying, soft Joel, drinking, swearing, lil bit of angst, happy ending, this thing is long af, it's been a long while since I watched the show/saw anything about the game so it might be a little out of character or just "off" in general, there's not really any mentions of gender for reader so here you go my fellow non binaries :D

Anyways, let's get to the fic.

You knew Joel.

Before the outbreak he was a single father, a very caring and loving one. Being his neighbor meant seeing him every now and then, being that type of colleague you see once in a while and say hi.

At least for the other neighbors.

You, in the other hand, was much more close than that.

To start with the fact that Tommy was your best friend, you two met at high school and became inseparable, so naturally you would know his brother, Joel, and his niece, Sarah. You always lived there, nearby, so it was normal for you to hang out with both brothers whenever you could and even take care of Sarah when Joel would come home late from work. You knew her since she was born and, hell, she was almost part of your family too.

Not that you would admit it out loud though. But you really cared for her, and for her father.

As you grew closer to Tommy, you grew inevitably closer to Joel as well. Since you met him you knew he was a cool guy, respectful but yet playful, not like the guys you met before that only talked about hooking up and making out, no, Joel was gentle and friendly and, when you know him, talkative. It always drew your attention how he looked after Tommy and, later on, Sarah. it was endearing to see.

When Sarah was 12, you moved in the house right next to Joel's, wich was the number one reason you became so close to him.

Oftenly you picked Sarah from school and had her sleep in your house because Joel would come home late, always recieving an apologizing look and a shy smile the morning after when he would come to take her home and, oh! How you loved that smile.

To "pay his debt" (as he liked to say) he'd take you out to some bar or a restaurant whenever Sarah went on a sleepover at a friend's house, and you two always ended up sitting on the corner just sipping on your drinks and talking about life, giving each other advice, sharing life experiences, and above all having a good time. He'd also not drink any alcohol just to drive you home safe, and refuse to listen to any of your protests.

One night you were at a restaurant, on the other side of the city, talking like always and Joel laughed at something you said, genuinely laughed. And that was when you realized you had fell in love with the man, you were always giving him those looks and scarlet cheeks without even noticing, until this night came and changed everything, you were now aware of every little glance, casual touch, any smile and laugh he gives you, you were drunk i this feeling.

But Joel? Oh, he already knew that for so long.

The moment for him was when you came to lunch with him and Sarah at his house, something around a year before. You helped him cook the meal, wich made him notice how much better that dish tasted with your touch to it whether it being just your presence or the ingredients you put, he wasn't quite sure yet.

After you all ate, you sat on the couch and Sarah suggested to put on some music, and right after that start looking through Joel's vinil collection. Let's say she knew what she was doing, first she put on some rock, Gun's and Roses, just in the ambience as you both talked and she washed the dishes. After that she found the vinil Joel had bought only and exclusively because you recommended from a band you really like, you say it reminds you of home, as your father used to play those songs all the time.

He watched as your eyes went wide with a look of excitement when realization washed over you, the melody forcing you to your feet and pulling Sarah. You rocked back and forth, dancing with the teenage girl, as you sang with the most wonderful voice you ever had.

The sparkle in your eyes mixed with Sarah's laughs and the vibe of the song made him realize how much of a wonderful person you are. Always kind to other and wiling to go out of your way to help someone, your charming personality and your unique style, oh! How much he loved that.

Joel not only saw your gorgeous features but also you, the real you. That is scared of thunders, that loves music, that cooks like a chef and have those little quirks and mannerisms he picked up unconsciously, all of that drove him out of his mind and he loved the feeling of loving you, it made him feel alive. Of course seeing how much Sarah likes you too and the way you're so caring towards her just makes it clear: you're the one for him.

Joel's drunk into it since that day. Every time you wave at him from your yard, every time he takes you to these restaurants and bars, when he sees you in his passanger seat, and the fact you just grow more and more admirable to him... It only makes him want you even more, it makes him want to be the one to treat you right after seeing so many partners destroy you. He'd glue pice by piece if needed.

Talking of bars... In one of those times you two went out, you decided to leave the bar you were at and go back to Joel's place. The food at the bar was absurdly expensive and your stomachs were grumbling way too loud for you to just spend the rest of the night there.

Once you got to his house, he made two sandwiches for the both of you and you ate slowly, never losing the topic you were talking about. When you two finished, Joel went to wash the dishes and once again you decided to put on some music.

Looking through his vinils you saw one you also had, a very very old one, dated in the 40's/50's. It started to spin and a few songs into it, it started playing one you really liked: 'Cheek to Cheek - Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong'. By that time Joel had already finished, he walked into the living room still wiping his hands with a towel when you started swaying around to the calm yet enthusiastic beat.

Moving your hips, you felt the melody entering your body and giving you the best feeling of peace. For Joel you looked ethereal in such form, unworried and calm.

A tought crossed his mind and he acted on it before the opportunity scaped. Joel approached you behind your back as you still had your eyes shut closed, feeling yourself through the song, he then placed his right hang on your waist testing the waters. First he had to know if you were okay with that, little did he know you were melting inside, unable to come up with something to do or say in that moment, so you just kept going, like nothing was happening.

As you didn't show any sign of discomfort or didn't flinch from his touch, he placed the left hand on the assigned place on your waist like it was supposed to be there for so long. Now becoming more comfortable, he swayed with you and came even closer, with that your hands automatically went to his, guiding them lower to your hips.

It felt like a dream for the both of you, and of course you wouldn't ruin it with any obvious comment, so you just accepted each other's presences and enjoyed it.

By the middle of the song you kept your hands in his as you turned to face him, still dancing lightly.

Joel looked into your beautifully colored irises and saw the contentment, making him bloom a smile of his own. As you also stared at his honey eyes you placed your arms on both sides of his head, lightly and gently wrapping your fingers around the back of his neck.

Ever so slowly you approached each other unconsciously, ending up doing exactly what the music says, dancing cheek to cheek.

In a few moments you pulled back, just to look at him in the eyes again, now you saw the desire and all the unspoken words and your eyes dropped to his mouth, slightly open and awaiting for what comes next. Yet you decided to speak up before things got confusing.

"I, uhm..." You start, looking down "I really like you Joel, and I don't mean just as a friend or in a way to get this situation to increase... I really do like you, and I have for a time now" now you look into his eyes again.

Joel seems surprised, probably much more because you had the courage to say it first than with the actual statemente, he already suspected your feelings. He opened his mouth a few times, looking for the best words to not fuck this up.

Before starting he let out a relieved breath "when I'm with you I feel alive" he let's out "You make my days a little bit brighter and you bring the colors of love back into my life" Joel laughs "gosh, I'm not even good with words but for you I have practiced this speech for so long... Waiting for the day I would be able to call you mine".

His gaze soft yet eager for you, analyzing every reaction of yours, he's been waiting for so long, poor man. While you're still processing what he just said.

"then do it, I've been your's for so long already" you breath out, coming closer again, but thus time your lips finally touch.

After that, what I can say is that your relationship is solid as rock, you love each other so much and absolutely no one can get into it, you are inseparable.

... Well, at least you thought.

A few days before the outbreak it was your father's birthday and you couldn't just not see him like the past two years, you decided to visit him, perfect timing for disaster.

As the snow falls outside the window of your house in Jackson, you remember it all like it was yesterday...

"Are you sure you don't want to come with me?" - you ask Joel as you hold onto his jacket. He just returns with a chuckle.

"C'mon! There's still time! You go home, pack your's and Sarah's things and I buy you two tickets, what do you think?" - you try again.

"You know I can't just leave everything behind, love. Sarah has school and I'm about to take that project" - Joel plants a kiss to your temple.

You're disappointed but not surprised, you alredy knew he couldn't come with you, but something within told you to push him and Sarah into that bus with you. Maybe it was just the idea of being three weeks away from your boyfriend, but there was still a bad feeling in you that you can't seem to get rid of.

He locks eyes with you, his honey eyes always seemed the things to calm you down don't matter what happened, and he opened his mouth to say something but the words never came out, you decide to talk then.

"I know love, I just... Have a bad feeling, you know?" - you sigh, looking to the ground then back at him.

"I'll miss you a lot" - you confess.

His gaze softens, with his hands wrapped around your face he leans to a kiss, that is interrupted by an announcement on the speakers, saying your bus was waiting.

Joel gives you one last peck on the lips before pulling you into his embrace. The man is not very good with words, you know that, so this is his way of saying 'I'll miss you too'.

When you pull back, his big brown eyes are filled with unshed tears, sight that make your own set water up. Painfully you break free from his grip, slowly walking away as the tears rolled down both of your cheeks.

...

When you first came to Jackson and you saw Tommy again after 20 years, you had talked to him about... Well, over all everything that happened but mostly what happened to Joel.

But Tommy isn't dumb, he knows who you are even after 20 years apart, he knows if he ever tells you where Joel is you would go flying to him in the same instant, but with all those ridlers and infected around he couldn't handle the idea of letting you go, even more after just reuniting with his biggest friend. He won't risk it.

When you two sat and talked, you asked him if he knew where Joel was, but Tommy shrugged, said in a breath that he just didn't talk to him for a long time and, as Joel is, he probably didn't stay in the same place for too long.

He also tol you about Sarah... With a painful voice he told you how he just watched as he lost his niece and his brother on the same night, because Joel just... Wasn't the same anymore, he changed, he did things (but Tommy never told what things)... Joel isn't the same man you met 20 years ago.

"Well, I didn't expect him to be the same" - that's what you told him, gaining a pitiful gaze from your friend.

Tommy feels pity for you, he thinks you're so lost in the world, and that you need for a purpose so bad, you will chase down any opportunity to go back to that old life of yours. You told him it wasn't about it but of couse he never listened, he just wished for you to wake up to reality, wich in his mind was, that you are now safe, in a place you can live the rest of your life in peace.

But it didn't erase your deep sadness.

It's been five months since you came to Jackson, it haven't been half as bad as you tought it would be, actually people here are neighbourly, everyone helps everyone. Gosh, you like this place. But you can't forget how lonely you feel now.

Of course, there's Tommy and his wife, but now you live alone in this enormous house he got you. Such a huge place and nothing to fill it with if not solitude. But the worst part of it is how seeing Tommy again resurfaced the feelings for Joel you so long burried away, as the only way you found of copig with the fact you would never see him again.

The problem is that now there is hope.

And suddently the urge to know more, to find him, hits you. You can find him, you just need the right clues.

You came back to your house, unlocking the door and shutting it behind you, you saw the map spread over the dining table and for a brief moment the possibility of staying and just... Leaving Joel be, crossed your mind. For a moment it doesn't seem so bad after all... If he didn't come to you before, why would he want you now? The person who took people's lives, who learned how to use a gun on their own, who can't sleep at night with the ghosts of the people they killed... You're not yourself anymore, why would he want you back?

But before you could think further into it, a knock behind you brings you back into reality. Turning the knob again to open it, you saw Tommy, in an euphoric state.

"You need to come with me, right now" - The man says with a wide smile across his face.

You're still clueless - "What happened?".

Before answering he pulled our of the door, dragging you by your arm across the street, right to the construction he was helping with.

You see the horses and recognize some of the people standing with them, but there's one little girl, around 13 or 14 years old, you can't record.

Abruptly Tommy stops to turn to you, with tears on his eyes - "someone heard your prayers, my friend".

He then placed a hand on your shoulder, leading you into the crowd of people, as you got further into it, your eyes catch Maria talking to a man, his salt and pepper hair falling over his eyebrows and then you saw it.

His big brown eyes.

Staring into your own.

Your heart drops and your knees turn weak. How are you even still standing?

"Joel?" - you call his name, but he is still unsure if it's a dream or not.

His heart beats loud on his ears with the realization, you are alive.

Tommy lets go of your shoulder and you waste no time in running to Joel, straight to the safety of his arms, safety you longed during 20 years. But yet he stays froze in place, maybe his mind was tricking him? Could it be an hallucination? He's tired and haven't slept in at least three days, he can't just trust his eyes right away.

But it is not necessary.

You finally get to him and he don't hesitate, his hands reaching for both sides of your face as he examinates it. Your gaze never leaving his as well.

Desperate arms pull you into his embrace. He smells like wet grass and wood, not the expensive cologne he used to wear when going out with you, but it isn't a problem. After all you found him, or better saying, he found you.

Joel tuck his fingers around the back of your neck and under your hair as he wishes to get closer to you, if it's possible. And he cries.

You hear his snifles on your ear and feel his tears leaving a wet spot on you jacket.

Joel's not good with words, you know that, but this is him saying "I missed you". This is him telling you about Sarah, Tess and how he lost himself the night of the outbreak, and it doesn't need one word to make you understand. He lost everything. But for what it seems, he just found everything again.

[crabas-lordes]

You don't mind the bared teeth of their permanent grin, even as it twists into something strained. Those black eyes narrow with the only white one, orange pupils flashing into something that would send most running.

Not you. Never you.

You've dealt with Eclipse enough for so long that you know when it's safe to run or not. And now is not the time.

Eclipse dangerously dips his head, nearly silhouetting that minacious gaze and grin. The sharp, ray-like horns are always so beautiful crowning him in this light, but you keep your eyes on theirs. You don't blink, you don't step back. Your mouth twitches, and you hold your swallow. You're not foolish, however. You know he senses how your insides tighten and shake as their imposing form leans toward you.

He's a predator ready to pounce, and you've always been the prey biding the time to escape.

His mouth finally parts, and his words roll with a hiss of his native tongue. "You're so quick to side with them and judge me when you don't know the whole picture yourself, umbra. Shall I paint it for you, or is your opinion already set?" Something inside their mouth sharply clicks and clatters.

You don't relent with your own special glare. You let your eyes cascade down Eclipse's hunched and obviously tensed form. An exhale releases from your nose as you see his eggplant-purple cloak swish around his legs. Looking at him now brings a tingling pang through your chest at the thought of Sun and Moon.

You love them both.

And it hurts because...

You've taken a liking to him.

"Alright," you give in quietly. You're nice enough to speak his tongue. "I'll listen."

You lift your shoulders and ball your hands into fists. You can feel how warm and clammy your palms are through your fingerless gloves. Your brow twitches, and you finally lift your head. All you can see is the black shadowing Eclipse's face, brightening pupils sizing up your bite-sized frame. Fitting of their namesake. Their smile has thinned so much it's almost just a line, but the shine of those daggers still catches your eye.

Oh, but life preservation be damned. Having a lack of it got you this far.

You intently point, hardening your glare. You don't care how much your hand shakes, you're being plenty nice enough. And it's only because you've dealt with Cannibals for all your space life.

"So, justify eating your crew then."

—

Some things may be different in the actual fic, but! Another concept thing where your good ol' friends Sun and Moon tell you the truth of their past, and it makes you confront your other dear ol' friend about it :)

Eclipse and the Beings Made of Stardust AU belongs to @maudiemoods

The MC is gender neutral, but how I drew them is how I personally imagine them.

(AH I also forgot the wispy back part of Eclipse's head in the first panel, but it's fine lol)

[brisquad-unit-4402]

being gorgeous

HAHA SORRY I'M A LITTLE LATE TO THE 2.0 REVEAL THIRST PARTY i passed out while writing this yesterday and it shows. and then i've done nothing else today except for write, eat a donut, write, reheat some pork chops, write, join an online meeting, and write. it's 8:23 am. bonus points if you can pinpoint the exact moment i dropped my phone and fell asleep last night. and also the point where it turned morning here and i started getting goofy. literally no matter what happens all roads lead to Oh My God Why Is Shu So Beautiful

funny story while i was writing this: i wrote p much all of this on my pc and i have all of the noctyx puppets around my desk area but taichou is the only one that's actually on the desk and when i was starting out for the day i couldn't concentrate because he was just staring at me like ._. so i turned him around to face the wall and somehow that was what kicked off 3631 words???

shoutout to 🍰 anon for making soooo many of my neurons activate. we have a mutualistic symbiotic relationship and i think i'm going to go insane. i've spent the better part of the last 24 hours just writing this and nothing else i think i've actually lost it.

tags: established relationship, suggestive content, making out, 2.0 outfit, praise kink, humiliation kink, hurt/comfort, self-image positivity ig?, soft dom reader, gender neutral reader, sex references under the read more but there's no actual sex lol

⚠ suggestive/sexual content, praise kink, and humiliation kink under read more. content under read more is not intended for minors

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

All that muscle, and still Shu finds himself between a wall and a hard place. He wanted to try on something new, and naturally you were the first to check him out.

And, God, you checked him out. He wore a loose black robe covered in the skeletons and bones you were so used to seeing on a daily basis. The robe nearly grazed the floor of the changing room, and as he shuffled his feet, the fabric wrapped around the outline of Shu’s strong calves before returning to rest. A plume of fur adorned one shoulder while the other bore a moon pauldron that only drew your eye to the broad shoulders underneath. He tied his long hair up into a ponytail, the dark interrupted by streaks of pink and blond by his bangs, and purple hair fell down his back and caught the gleam of his bright eyes.

Though those bright eyes were cloudier with the shyness of being the center of your attention. He resolved himself to confront it. He cleared his throat and met your gaze, and asked, “Do you like it?”

“Shu, look at yourself.” You grasped him by the shoulders and turned him around to face the mirror. “Of course I do. You’re beautiful.”

He tried to keep a straight face, but there was no way he’d be able to hide his red ears with his hair tied up. “How do you just say things like that so easily?”

“Because it’s true,” you said. You rested your chin on his shoulder, right next to the armor, and watched the mirror as his face turned to roses the same shade as the marking on his forehead.

You get comfortable. “You’ve always been so handsome no matter what you do.” Your hands hold him by his waist, but it doesn’t take you long before one roams upwards. His waistline slopes out to his chest, and you feel Shu’s body shift as your hand slides under the fabric and cups one side of his chest. The mirror serves as a reminder that you were practically on top of him. “But honestly, Shu, you look so hot I can’t believe it.”

“I- I do?”

You mutter in agreement before you kiss his neck, languid and low where it meets his collarbone.

Shu gasps in surprise as it turns passionate, traces of your teeth along skin usually hidden by his hair. He softens into you as you fondle him, and when you circle his nipple he knows he’s doomed.

Teeth sink into his skin, and his breath hitches at the sudden pain. It quiets as your tongue soothes the mark, and goes blinding as you flick his nipple in time with a long lick. Shu can’t help but moan at that. His shoulder rises as nervous energy drips down his body from where your lips cling to his neck, and he knows you can feel him tremble as you toy with his nipple.

The kisses rise higher on his neck, a line of desperation even though you know you have all the time in the world. It’s more like you need to make him know he’s cherished. You weren’t kidding when you complimented him earlier; he’s always been good-looking, and you’ve never been shy about that. But trying a different look made him just as tense as he was excited, so you’re here to shoo all those insecurities away. After all, you’d be lying if you said his new look didn’t turn you on.

You take a glance at the mirror's reflection. Shu's eyes are shut. His long lashes flutter between his makeup, and his lips are parted as he takes all the sensations in. Meanwhile, you look sly and calculated as you cast a sideways glance to your reflection. A bit of your tongue pokes out of your mouth and along your latest attack.

Using the mirror, you take Shu's head in your hands as your lips run over his ear. His eyes snap open into lovely crystal, stunned and sparkling.

“I don’t think I can resist you,” you whisper. "Look at yourself."

He averts his eyes. "I mean, I'm not all that."

"Oh, you are." You turn him to the mirror as your fingers glaze along his chin. Your nails lightly scratch at his jawline, and he can't help but stare at the movement in the mirror.

Out of the corner of his vision, he catches his expression and nearly kicks himself. Was he really that out of control? His horrors are realized when he notices the bead of saliva at the corner of his mouth. He swats the back of his gloved hand over it.

But you catch Shu's hand before he can even wipe it away. "Don't."

"But..."

"Stay still."

Following your command wasn't so hard. He was frozen in place anyways.

It takes everything he has to not react as you drag your tongue up his jawline between the fingernail scrapes. His heart hammers as your lick curls perfectly around his lip to catch the saliva before sliding it back into place inside his mouth.

He follows what feels natural, and when his tongue meets yours, fire runs in your blood. Outside it, too. Sorcerous flames kick alive around his head, then fade just as quickly as they appeared. He's a light show even in his invisible unconscious, and sparks course in your open-mouthed kiss in jolts of hot heaviness.

The hand that caught his earlier leads him as he takes a step back, then another, and his third ends flush against the wall. Shu's ponytail swirls around from the movement, and brushes along your body as you pin him to the wall of the changing room.

There's a loud smack as you end the kiss, breathless and heated. Shu's lashes blur over his enchanted purple eyes, and a few strands of black and gold-blond hair get in the way of his face.

"So handsome," you say, and move his head back to the mirror. "You can still see yourself?"

He barely rustles out a yes, but you feel his head nod slowly between the nails on his jaw and tangled in his hair.

"Good. I'm glad you get to see how handsome you really are." Your grasp crawls up to his cheek. "Watch yourself, and don't dare to look away. I want you to see yourself become a beautiful mess. Can you do that for me?"

Another nod, slower this time.

"Say it."

Shu swallows, and struggles to put the words together. He didn't think he was ugly per se, but he always thought of himself as just plain average. One of the many so-so faces out there in the world. All your praise breaks through those thoughts like an arrow smack-dab in the center of a target, however, and he's abashed at how easily you can say something he's never considered himself as.

It's unfamiliar. A new feeling, really, and likely the one he was dreading when he decided to wear something new for a change. Shu doesn't consider himself a head-turner—that's usually reserved for one of his friends, and he's used to watching them in the limelight from his own comfortable corner of darkness—so now that he's the one against the wall with eyes on him and nowhere to run, hot shame tempers his blush. The mirror only intensifies the feeling.

He looks back at himself. His hair's already messed up from the hand against his scalp, and one side of his neck peppered with the indentation of fangs along the soft skin. Not to mention his decidedly uncute face, with hands far prettier than his own around his jawline, murky eyes crinkled from his perverted pleasure, and yet another string of saliva down from his swollen-red lips. It was probably left over from the kiss. He thinks he should call it disgusting.

Your face rests along his in the mirror, and he can feel your breath on his cheek as you massage his flustered face. You're way more attractive than he is, and he has to wonder: does such an average-looking guy like him really deserve to have such a beautiful person dote over him like this?

"It's okay to indulge yourself, you know," you suggest. Your voice is golden caramel and rich chocolate. "You really are gorgeous. Even if you don't believe it."

Gorgeous. The word bounces around his head. He's never been called gorgeous before, and he nearly turns away on instinct.

The new feeling, he decides, is being gorgeous.

You smooth over one of the long locks of hair along his chest, where you teased him earlier. It feels like silk through your fingers, and as you reach higher Shu's eyes widen just a little more. Then you see the glassiness between the color, and you realize there's more going on in his head than you thought.

"I'll take care of you, if you want me to." You put your agenda on hold just to make sure you aren't about to overwhelm Shu. "Do you want me to?"

"Reader, do you really think..." Shu lowers his head as he fights to form the sentence. "You really think I'm... that?"

"I do."

"And you're not just saying that?"

"You are, I swear. Here, let's take a break real fast." You step away and give Shu some space, but he keeps his back against the wall. He exhales, and the color drains from his face. “Stop me if you need me to. But when we met, I thought you were really pretty. I really liked your sense of style, and the colors in your hair, and I liked to sneak looks at your biceps." You laugh a little at that. "I love your eyes a lot. They're really bright, and whenever you smile, they always squint a little.

"That's one of the other things I really love about you, whenever you smile. You like to laugh. So you smile often, and it's always because they're something to be happy about, and that makes me happy too. Sometimes because it affects me too, and sometimes, just because I love whenever my partner gets to enjoy himself."

You scratch the back of your head. "And, um, I came off a little strong when I saw you, so I'm sorry if I scared you. I didn't mean to do that at all. It's just that I got used to seeing your usual outfit, so now that you're trying something new..." You laugh again, but this time it's a gentle giggle, and without lust fueling you, you feel a bit embarrassed. "I mean, I really did think you were beautiful before, especially once we got closer, and I got to explore you more. But this is a whole other level. You've really outdone yourself. Like, I couldn't even hold back when I saw you, I was just so attracted to you that I didn’t even think. I really should have, though. I didn’t mean to cross a boundary.”

Shu’s eyebrows raise. “What? You didn’t do anything wrong, it’s just that…”

He trails off. He slumps over and slides down the wall with a sigh as he sits. His ponytail rests along the floor and along one of his sleeves. "I know you compliment me often, but I never thought you seriously meant it. No one's ever said things like that to me before."

"Really?" You sit next to him. "Should I stop?"

"No! No, you're fine. I mean. I think... It's not like I didn't like it." Shu buries his face into his hands and groans. "I really liked it, actually. I think it was just too new, and it's second nature for me to deny how good it feels, and—" He cuts himself off to muster up his courage. He lowers his hands just enough to peek out, but his fingers thread through each other and hide his face. "I've never been called gorgeous before."

"Was that okay?"

"It was perfect," he admits. His eyebrows relax, and his eyes squint. You don't need to see the rest of his face to know his lips curved up. But he dilutes his swoon with another sigh, and you can tell he's disappointed in himself as he drops his hands to his side. "I wish I wasn't in my head when you said it. Sorry for ruining a good moment."

"You didn't ruin anything, Shu, what are you talking about?" You reach to hold his hand, but hesitate, unsure if he wants to be touched. But he turns his palm over to met yours, and you connect. "I'm glad we're talking about it, and I'm hoping that it's helping you work through it, too. I'd hate to do or say anything to you that you couldn't handle."

"Thank you. That's really sweet of you." You take in how he wraps his fingers around yours and squeezes. "I'm going to calm down for a moment."

You sit together for a moment. His face is a slideshow between thoughts, and you rub circles along his hand with your thumb as he recomposes himself. You trust him.

You send comfort through your fingertips on the changing room floor, and his deep breathing turns to silence as a minute passes by. Then Shu turns to you, and lifts your hand in his. "Do you want to try again?"

"You're up for it?"

He nods, and this time it's with all his energy. "I was really looking forward to it. Can we?"

"Of course, Shu, anything for you." Already you're starting to feel warm. You get up to your feet, and bring Shu with you.

You're not so sure if Shu is aware of this, but even in his weakest moments, he moves elegantly. Not so much that it looks practiced, but he rises nimble like the shadows he channels his sorcery through. His long hair rests on his sleeves, then slips behind his back airily as the leathery wing along his torso flares with the motion.

He doesn't let go of your hand, even as he steps back and rests against the wall.

"You're okay with this?" You ask.

"It felt nice."

Your hand lets go of his, but it doesn't break away from his glassy-clear skin, and instead takes in the shape of his arm. His inner wrist is so soft, but the skin gets pleasantly rougher as you continue upwards into the plush of his forearm, and by the time you reach the peak of his biggest muscles, the plush turns firm.

The other holds him by his hips right under the sash of his robes. You can wrap yourself so easily around his waistline, and the urge to snatch him up is stifling.

But you're on a mission, and Shu's straight nose is dusted with pink, and when your hands both squeeze his body, a short gleam of fire spirals out behind him, and yet, his vivid, royal eyes are what captivate you the most.

You're so lost in his long lashes and the flecks of galaxy that you feel helpless, even with him pinned underneath you. "Shu, can I kiss—"

You get your answer before you even finish the question.

It's like you never paused in the first place. He enters your mouth first, and you match his movements, crossing along his tongue as if it was your lifeblood. It probably is. Shu has a tendency to unlock hunger like you've never known it before.

His arms unconsciously flex at the contact. Aroused, you drive forward and force him further against the wall, and when you hear the rumble of a moan between your connected lips, your fingers clutch harder at his waist.

Your bodies are flush against one another, and as you lean forward, you feel the telltale silkiness of his hair. You don't dare to open your eyes as you fumble around for a tuft to tangle your hands in. Shu pulses in your mouth as you take hold, and parts just enough to aim for your bottom lip as he returns the favor and bites. You hear a lewd, liquidy smack as he hurriedly glosses over the nip, then back to your parted lips. Every time there's even the slightest tension between his hair and your fingers, you notice, he rushes to kiss you harder.

So when he goes in for another round, you move your mouth away. His eyes flutter open in confusion, then shocks into surprise as you drag him in front of you. The mirror reflects his surprise right back at him.

Your head perches on Shu's shoulder. "You up for this, baby? You want to see?"

The heat returns. His reflection is another reminder of how he's totally at your mercy, and all the shame that comes with being so whipped that he already looks this ruined.

But you called him beautiful earlier. Gorgeous.

He kind of likes the shame.

"Yeah," Shu says, breathless. "Y-yeah, I do."

"Good boy," you coo, and that washes a whole new set of feelings over him that he files away for later. He tucks his chin away, embarrassed at the name, but he's still focused on the reflection as your reach to the top of his head and the beginnings of his ponytail.

Shu grew his hair out long, and you comb through the ponytail as it loosens down his back. "Pretty boy," you say. Your voice is tempting so close to his ear, especially as you gather his hair together. "Pretty boy with pretty hair. You take good care of it."

He lets out a hum deep in his throat as you smooth through it, only for it to turn into a startled choke as you grab at the base of his head. He chides himself for not seeing through your plan, but not enough to stifle how the choke turns into a moan as you pull. His neck jerks back. Then your lips make contact with his nape like a vampire to prey, and the moan turns into an even more humiliating yelp. The mirror proudly displays his neediness, but the high pitch is yours alone to keep.

"Didn't mark this side earlier." You mutter as you blow cool air over your latest kiss, and bask in how he shivers storms. "You like that?"

"Mmm, feels good," he says, voice wavering.

"Sounded like it, too. I liked hearing it. Gives me a chance to keep playing around with you."

His common sense tells him to protest, but he's too enthralled by the rough kisses and pulls. You tug on his hair to move him instead of asking him, and the way that you can command him without even using words both impresses and mortifies him.

It's the bites that send him over the edge, though. His nape is your territory. The first hickeys have already darkened on the other side, and when he sees you ravenous over his elongated neck, it's dirty and starved and lovely.

You press a kiss under Shu's ear and he jolts at the pleasure. When you suck, he inhales shakily, and lolls his head to the side. He had no idea that he just put himself in the perfect position. "Just like that, stay still. That's perfect." You weave your fingers through an open seam in his outfit, and when you leave your next mark, it's with your hands over his chest underneath the fabric. You grope his cleavage. "Perfect, perfect, perfect."

"H-how did you even— nngh, ah!"

His nipples were already hard enough, but then you just had to go and twist the damn thing like it wouldn't send him so far down to hell that he'd come back up in heaven.

"Just like that, Shu, baby, you're doing so well!" A flick on the bud here, a pull on his ponytail there, your words barely able to ring out as you frenzy between the kisses and the licks.

Whatever noise hangs in the air, it's downright pornographic, and it's only when Shu sees his open mouth in the mirror that he realizes that's his voice. It wobbles between a cry and a huff. Pink and purple dances around his hazy reflection, but as aroused as he is, he recognizes them as his harmless fire. He didn't even know he did that.

The fire trails behind his head as everything goes hot. He can barely think straight, but the only thing coursing through his mind is that he's never been able to feel delight like this before.

Where you stand behind him, Shu rolls his hips, his neck still held back against your body. You've been doing such a good job of keeping yourself together, but the slow coursing is a death sentence. You welcome it wholeheartedly.

"Mm, Shu...!" That elegance is seriously biting you in the ass right now. Even when he's horny, he's graceful, but you ache for more.

And even when he's submissive, he's strong. You tend to forget that those biceps aren't just for show.

Shu practically plucks you out of the embrace and to his side. His voice is husky but whiny. "Mirror or not, I'm not about to go down on you standing up."

"Let's get you a bed," you negotiate. The sooner you can get all you love out of your system, the better. "Lead the way, gorgeous."

He doesn't waste any time at all. He holds his arm out along the small of your back and rests his hand against where your hips connect with your thighs, and as you shuffle out of the changing room he keeps you close to his, brushing up against you all the while. You'd almost think he was preening.

"Gorgeous," you utter. Hopefully he learns how one day.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

[gok1bvri72]

♠️♥️ Lyney x Reader♥️♠️

Synopsis: Reader has some serious escapist tendencies, no friends anymore, and lives in a shell they are too afraid to crawl out of because they perceive reality as disgusting and mundane nowadays. What happens when a certain magician shows them that reality can still be beautiful as a way to thank them for the freedom they inadvertently granted him with?

!!SPOILERS FOR THE ARCHON QUEST!!

This is kinda long! I also made it at 1 AM so if there are any errors it's cuz of that ('□`) I personally have been going through some things and have been finding a lot of comfort in this goofy ol'magician. So sorry if this has some darkers tones than my usual stuff! I tried to keep reader as gender neutral as I could by not name dropping anyone and only referring to them as "You" variations. If there is a slip up please tell me!

You're hardwired to be an extrovert, but you exist in an environment and place that shuns you and forces you into a shell.

You've had your voice ripped from your throat one too many times and you've been silenced for nothing more than a mere giggle.

You were raised in an isolated world, away from humanity and it's harsh reality.

You didn't have any friends growing up except for the occasional child of a parent's friend who would visit.

Your siblings would hide away and your father would yell all the time. Your mother was always at work. Your friends were in your worlds of fiction and your books. The drawings you began to make to see these adventures you had with them.

You don't know how real people act or how to speak with them, treating everything like dialogue in a book.

Friends you had made at one point eventually coined you as toxic because of your inability to speak with any of them properly. Perhaps you should've tried harder. No, you definitely should have tried harder.

Perhaps they would still be here if you had made more drawings for them. Maybe if you had kept your opinions to yourself. Maybe if you had just smiled and nodded. Maybe they would still be here.

You became a shell. Hiding yourself away from any possible relationships. Keeping yourself away from anyone else you could possibly hurt with your ignorance. You had friends, it's not like you were lonely. The characters you read about and drew all the time were your friends.

Yet, they began to feel empty. You began to feel empty. Focusing all your time on honing your talent and living in a world of fiction reality became bland. Disgusting even. This only drove you to hide away from it even more.

You were lonely, craving friends and love you knew you couldn't let yourself have. It was like an addiction. You had it once and now you want it more. But nothing else ever hits like that first high does, right?

For the sake of everyone else around you, you cut them all off. You were stung once. Being shelter your whole life you didn't know how to handle it. You gave up on everything and everyone.

You felt hollow.

You met him after one of his shows.

The magician was so insistent you see his next one.

You supposed it couldn't hurt.

So you arrived at his next one.

And then the next.

And the next.

Until you began to see every show of his.

He would speak to you after each one, ask you how your day was. He would tell you about his.

Even after he was ousted as a member of the fatui you still saw his shows. You still spoke with him. It was as if you didn't even care.

Something about him and his magic, the reality bending of it all was beautiful. The most beautiful thing you had seen in ages.

It didn't feel real, yet it was. It was magnificent. He was magnificent.

Nothing could change that. Especially not something as silly as a title or affiliations.

As far as you were concerned, he was wonderful.

Even after he began to show you his true colours.

He had shown you something beautiful, and for that you could only appreciate every side of him.

Everything about him was addictive, every single part and side. Every nook and cranny. Both sides of the beautiful coin.

That's when you realised you became too attached.

You didn't want to ruin something so beautiful with your thorns, so you stopped attending his shows.

Stopped seeing him all together.

You couldn't tarnish something so glorious by hurting the person responsible for it. You couldn't hurt the majesty of it all. The majesty he showed you.

He noticed you stopped attending his shows immediately.

He sought after you for ages. Since you hardly leave you house only for food he didn't find you for a while.

However, once he did he wouldn't leave.

He followed you around, asking all about where you had been.

You wouldn't respond.

All though he wouldn't speak of it, you in a way provided him with a sense of comfort.

You didn't even question him once after he was revealed to be of the House of Hearth.

All though you loved him for being able to break reality, you weren't a monster. You never forced him to keep up his acts. You knew even someone as talented as he needs breaks.

So when he approached you, his hair unstyled and in plain wear with nothing more than a mere request of comforting silence or idle chatter not regarding his work you obliged.

He felt as if he could show both sides of himself to you, both sides of that coin. He could be as flashy or as monotonous as he wished. You granted him a sort of freedom.

He became very quickly attached to you.

When you stopped showing up to his performances he panicked.

Perhaps you were tired of his antics?

It took a long time, but you eventually did open up about why you stopped showing up.

He felt a side of him ache.

You were just about as alone in this world as he was, yet not at the same time.

He had his siblings to talk to, the blonde traveller to talk to. You seemed to have no one.

To learn his shows were a break from the world you viewed of rancid initially and how it brought you to love every part of him.

How ethereal he was to you.

And how you were afraid you would grow obsessive and toxic and how you didn't want that for him.

How he had been the closest thing you've had to a friend in years and how attached you had become.

How worried you were for him, how you adored him so much you were willing to cut yourself away if it meant keeping him safe from something potentially toxic. Even if it meant sacrificing your own happiness.

He wouldn't let you feel this way, no, he couldn't let you feel this way anymore.

He assured you that he would never run away, no matter what sides of yourself you were to show him. After all, you did the same for him.

He would understand and help you learn how to make friends, how to properly interact with others. Yet, he would want you to be the same around him.

In a way, he wanted to help you build a mask to wear like he does but still provide you with people you can be yourself around.

He thinks you are wonderful and misunderstood, yet he understands not all can see that. He wants to protect you like he does his siblings.

It's the only way he knows how to help, and you don't seem to mind either. He can't change everyone or anyone's opinion of you. Those are to each their own. But you can. And he can help you find a way to do that.

He doesn't want you to change who you are, but but doesn't want you to feel isolated and alone anymore either.

So a removable mask seems as if it's the best answer, no?

He also introduces you to his siblings and a blonde traveller along with their adventuring party. You meet a large amount of kind people including a young man who visually strikes quite a similar appearance to your friendly magician with a platinum blonde ponytail and bright crimson eyes and a young woman with a long, pink ponytail that fades to a blue and eyes that seem to have seen things beyond the scope of what a woman her age normally would have.

If you begin to feel nervous making so many new friends and with things changing so quickly, he doesn't hesitate to take things slower. He isn't afraid to make any adjustments for you.

He isn't afraid to return the feeling of freedom you blessed him with, so let him crack that shell of yours and help you spread your wings to soar out of that black abyss of isolation you've been drowning yourself in.

[maximwtf]

Heyy, would you be interested in writing legolas x reader (f or gn) where reader is hopelessly in love with legolas but the love is unrequited. Reader never loses hope (doesn’t push it tho) and at the end legolas finds solace in reader but only because his “first choice” refused him/died/left (or something) and he chooses only after that the reader.

Sorry if this doesn’t make any sense.

Legolas x elven! reader

Words: 2530

Google Docs Pages: 4

Warnings: minor character death, kind of angsty, elf grief, cuddles but it’s sad, hair braiding

Opening: You find yourself falling for someone you’d been working alongside for hundreds of years. Though, you soon notice he seems to be interested in someone else. So no matter the attempts you make at getting closer to him, none of it works. He notices, but kindly lets you down.��

It’s only after a dreadful battle that you notice the elf he’d been interested in had fallen. Making you skip from second place to first, Legolas finding some solace in you. 

AN// Reader can be any gender! Hehe, I haven’t written for Legolas in a while, so hopefully I still got him somewhat figured out. Thank you for the request though, I had fun with this <3

I’m also closing requests for a while as I write out the older ones. They be suspecting arthritis. And no matter what this is, every joint in my body including my hands hurt so much, it takes me ages to write anything past 1k words. So hope yall don’t mind too much, I love writing the requests when I’m feeling out of ideas. Yall are much more creative, hehe <333

“Solace with a price.”

You’d tried to deny it, tried to tell yourself that there was no point in pursuing your feelings any further. It was clear as day that the man you’d laid your eyes on was after someone else, and you were in no way looking to get in between them. So you had tried multiple times to forget, to turn the other cheek. But what could you truly do when your mind had made a decision on its own. And it was persistent. 

You’d been a part of the guard for as long as you could remember, having wanted to join as soon as you could. So it had been the work that drew you in, having always been interested in weaponry and protecting the borders of the kingdom. It was only logical for you to want to join the guard. Though, it soon dawned on you that a lot of the jobs that required more movement were the patrols. Other than that, you’d be lucky to see anyone while on guard. Apparently the king wasn’t too fond of spilling the blood of his own. 

But he had a son. A son who wasn’t as afraid to fight as he was. But the prince wasn’t fierce either, not a killer. But he was a skilled archer who at some point started leading the patrols. You didn’t mind of course, having acknowledged his leadership skills quickly. And that had been all it was for the most part. You’d see him during the patrols, and other times he had more important business to attend to.

But as time went on, a crush began to form. You found yourself talking with him during the patrols and if you were lucky, after as well. He was very reasonable and well versed in a lot of subjects. Which gave the two of you much to talk about. And if not that, you found that fighting alongside him was fascinating. From your perspective, it felt like the two of you worked well as a team. Making the battles you from time to time faced during the patrols much easier. You found him a pleasure to be around, and sometimes caught yourself waiting to be able to talk to him. 

Though, a problem surfaced when you noticed him having his eyes on someone else. You knew he wasn’t one to bring his relations into conversations easily, especially when there were others around. But when he talked to you about this elf, it only confirmed your fears. And maybe it also pushed you over the edge just enough that you decided to come clean with your feelings. 

It was important for you to do this before he got any further with the elf he’s set his eyes on. Confessing any later would only make it all the more awkward, and if you never said anything you’d just feel even worse. So at the end, you didn’t see many ways out of the situation you’d gotten yourself into. 

So, after another patrol you bit down any hints of doubt in your mind and went for it. It took you a moment to find him, noticing that he’d left to tend to his other duties. You caught up with him in the hallway, near his father’s throne room. “Legolas!” You called out, slowing down to a walk as he turned back to look at you. He’d of course sensed your presence before you were even able to call out his name, but he always acted as if not. As if the call had been the first indicator of your form following him. “I had something…I wanted to talk to you about.” You cringed a little at the wording, but quickly faded the unpleased expression to a faint smile. 

Legolas had now fully come to a stop, eyes keenly on you as you closed in. “Go ahead”, he said in a calm tone. Somehow saying what you’d been planning so thoroughly, now that he was in front of you felt impossible. The sight of him standing in front of you, calm and collected, while your heart raced as your thoughts tried to form a comprehensible sentence. You could have sworn a flash of worry appeared in his face for a while, releasing it must have been for the amount of time it took you to finally speak up again. “I’m not certain if this is the best time nor the place to tell you this, so I apologise in advance.” You started, but to your ear it somehow now sounded like a formal report rather than a confession. The look the elf was giving you didn’t help, he seemed confused but curious to hear the rest. Though, he didn’t interrupt you. Allowing you to continue. “I fancy you. And I wanted to ask if…you felt the same.” You stuttered out the last part, feeling odd to leave it at the first statement. But now that you thought about it more, the last part sounded almost more like a plea. Mentally scowling at that, you waited for his response. 

Legolas looked a little troubled, but even that was hard to catch. You found that he was usually rather hard to read, the emotions on his face so faint that you really had to read into everything to catch how he was feeling. “Henion…” (I understand). Legolas said, voice a little quieter than before, though you assumed it was to not bring attention to the conversation. “But you must be aware of-” He began, but you stopped him. Not to be disrespectful, but you understood what he meant. “It is okay. I only wished to tell you…” You lied. Of course a part of you had hoped he’d somehow change his mind, choose you. But now it all felt awkward, regret brewing within you. But you also knew Legolas was nowhere near dumb enough to ignore that. “Walk with me?” He requested, seemingly having skipped over the previous topic. Not that you minded, not anymore. At least that’s what you swore to yourself. “Of course”, you nodded and followed him to the throne room. 

You’d sometimes tag along with him as he went to give a report to his father from the previous patrol. The king didn’t seem all too fond of the elves Legolas spent his time around. Though, you told yourself that he’d somewhat warmed up to you. That he wasn’t as harsh when it came to you tagging along with Legolas even after the patrols were done. Something about that gave you hope, even if it was false. 

You tried your best to keep your relationship with him as it was before, and he was making it easy as well. He’d talk to you like before during patrols and you’d still sometimes go with him to deliver any reports to his father after. It made you almost hope that you had another chance. That you had just confessed too early on, and that there was a chance after all. So keeping your hopes up, you kept talking to him. Sharing things about your life with him, and listening to whatever he had to say. 

But as time went on, you began to doubt if there was a chance at all. Legolas still seemed to view you as a close friend, if anything. He still had his eyes elsewhere, and each time you attempted to get closer to him he was able to kindly turn you down. So you didn’t push any further. Slowly trying to come to terms with the fact that this was never going to work out. 

But you still shared many things with him. The connection you had with him during battle was still there. And that’s what you put your trust on when a battle was announced, knowing you’d be sent there. 

But as you had expected, no battle was fought without the blood shed of your own kin. As the dust began to settle and the sounds of battle died down, you found yourself exhausted. Muscles so worn out you felt shaky. But even through that exhaustion you felt the need to find Legolas, having lost sight of him at the very end. The chaos around the area made it hard to make out anyone specifically, raising some worry within you. Maybe deep down you knew that he was okay, but not being able to find him as quickly as you would have hoped shook you a little. 

Your eyes landed on a small group of elves, some who had survived the battle with a smaller amount of injuries and a couple of healers. They’d all gathered around someone, and by the looks of it seemed desperate. A possibly fatal injury, you thought with a flash of sorrow and grief washing over you for a moment. The death of an immortal being, as pure as an elf, was never a pleasant sight. 

You raised your gaze, having paused for a moment to pay respect to whoever had fallen. Scanning the nearby area, you could spot who you believed to be Legolas. He’d strayed from the small group you’d just come across, form somehow slumped. You couldn’t see his expression clearly enough to tell what was going on, making you curious. 

You didn’t dare pass the group, staying near them as your eyes followed Legolas’ movements. This position allowed you to see the dreadful sight bestowed next to you. As the warriors began to make their way back to the kingdom, it gave you enough space to see who the healers were tending to. You recognized them, soon a more lost expression spreading across your face. Understanding why Legolas had seemed more distraught than you’d ever seen him before. Something so important to him had been lost that day. 

And from there began a confusing period of time. You could tell Legolas was defeated, down from the loss. And you were no stranger to the dangers of loss and what it could do to your kin. So it wasn’t unwarranted that you were worried about him, and had made it your mission to try and help him get back on his feet. 

And doing this also healed something in you as well. Perhaps you couldn’t court him, but helping him as a friend felt good as well. Like you had a purpose to fulfil by his side, even if not in the way you initially had hoped. 

This also meant you started spending more time with him. Publicly you could barely tell of the heartbreak he was going through, but it showed more when the two of you were alone. Which you found endearing, meaning he trusted you enough to talk to you about his thoughts. Though, during one of these talks he told you something that mixed up your whole view of the situation. 

“Would you still court me?” His calm voice asked. Your hands stopped braiding his hair, having to blink a couple of times before drawing in a breath. You felt Legolas tilt his head towards your’s, trying to find out why you’d gone so silent. Though, he didn’t say anything else, waiting for your response. Which you tried to form into something respectful. You wanted to tell him that this might have not been the best time to make decisions like this, but at the same time every other part of you wanted to say yes. “Yes, I think”, slipped out without even thinking. Something that resembled a smile appeared on the prince’s face, like he was relieved? “Then we shall make it official.” He said, something new in his tone but you could tell that this hadn’t magically removed the grief from his mind. Yet, he reached out for your hand and turned around to face you properly. He’d been between your legs, back towards you as you braided his hair, as had become tradition. You looked into his eyes, swallowing down the guilt that tried to overtake your mind. You’d gotten what you wanted, right?

Things moved so fast after. Or maybe they didn’t, you couldn’t tell. You’d been so shocked after that night that a feeling of numbness had spread across your whole being. What was even going on? The king had approved of the courting, which hadn’t come as a huge surprise to you. But even then, it all felt a little too unreal. And the guilt that had been brewing ever since he had confessed to you was going to boil over soon, you felt. But so the days kept passing, and this was now the reality you lived in. 

You were getting ready for bed, tidying up your hair so it would be easier to handle in the morning. Routines that somewhat kept you sane, keeping thoughts away from what had been going on. You’d watched Legolas go lay down already, beginning to wonder if you had started to slow down your routines on purpose for the amount of time they now took. Because there was still a part in you that wondered if you should have been helping him with the grief as a friend or as his partner? That, did Legolas choose you out of genuine interest or out of needing someone to just be there for him?

You shook your head, trying to swallow the hesitancy back down. No. Even if this was all wrong, you couldn't possibly leave him now. Not when someone he’d cared about had died, you didn’t want to put him through another heartbreak. This was what you had wanted, right?

While in your thoughts you had wandered to the bed, laid down and somehow automatically turned your back to Legolas. He might have been engulfed with bits of grief, but he wasn’t blind. If he saw the way you looked, he’d be able to tell how miserable you felt right then and there. You did still love him the same way as before, and this had been exactly what you’d asked for. But how could you enjoy something so precious, when it felt like you’d stolen the first place medal and sneaked your way out of the second place? And all of this was happening while you couldn’t tell Legolas of these feelings without hurting him, nor did you wish to leave him. You’d promised yourself that you’d help him now that he needed you the most. 

While engulfed in a state of self loathing and sadness, you felt the man scooch closer. His hand moved to your upper arm, as if to ask if he was allowed to be so close. He was, you wanted him to be. But you didn’t want to admit that to not feed the guilt. When you didn't reply, his arm moved itself over your waist to bring the both of you closer to each other. Taking the silence as a ‘yes’. But was there a way to enjoy closeness like this when you didn’t feel like it was meant for you. 

The edges of your eyes burned, but only a singular tear managed to escape. Racing its way down your face and disappearing into your pillowcase. At what cost had you gotten the ‘gi melin’ that felt like it echoed in the air as he said it.