#genshin impact angst
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chilumi-shipper · 3 months ago
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Soulbound
Zhongli x GN!Reader (Soulmate!AU)
Summary: Zhongli hated the mark on his neck, and he hated whoever the mark bounded him to. But fate plays a cruel joke, matching him with you, as he swore he would love no one else but Guizhong.
Tags: Angst/No Comfort, Short Story, Rejection, Hurtful Words, Hatred to Love
Soulmark - A mark that binds two individuals as soulmates.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
Morax had always been frustrated by the mark on his neck.
A glowing, permanent part of his body that marks him tied to a soulmate. He thinks its stupid, for the love of his life was already in front of him, a gray-haired inventor that no carving in his body could ever stop him from adoring.
He finds it unbelievable that his neck is claimed by a soulmark yet Guizhong's remain blank, and he curses Celestia above for such a foul joke.
How could he be for anyone else but her?
When her dust settled in the field of glaze lilies he thought were incomparable to her beauty, he was utterly devasted, his clawed hands held onto his neck, wanting to rip the soulmark that had been taunting him for centuries.
How could he be marked for someone else while the love of his life laid lifeless?
He loathed his mark, everything about it, and he will till his last breath.
...
Zhongli deeply dislikes you.
You are a messy, silly, babbling buffoon.
An adventurer from Mondstadt that embodies the nation's will of freedom. Bubbly, carefree, and loud, much like a fellow god he didn't particularly like.
Despite of his disdain of you, your affection towards him never wavered. You filled his somber days with excitement as you joyfully tell him stories about your adventures, share some new recipes you've learned, even ushering him to talk about obscure Liyue historical facts that you've always found interesting.
He was much too proper to shoo you away, and his cold looks and short responses didn't discourage you to try to make friends with the man that peeked your curiosity.
Ever so slowly, you had pried open his caged heart, planting a small seed that was so distinctly you.
He would have accepted you, he would have seen you as a friend... and yet...
Out of the corner of his eye, he caught a faint, familiar mark on your neck, revealed when you put your hair up into a ponytail.
Zhongli knew he truly disliked you.
...
"I don't believe in the marks either, Mr. Zhongli..." You reasoned with him, but his gaze still stung you with daggers.
He caged himself back up, ensuring that you could not care for the little seed you planted, no light would be able to reach it again.
His heart would not open...
No matter how many times he catches himself smiling at your antics.
No matter if he displays every gift and trinket you give him from your travels.
No matter how much he preferred your cooking over anyone else's.
No matter how beautiful you look staring up at him with your doe eyes as you confess your affection.
No matter how frustrated he felt at himself when he made you cry as he rejects your feelings.
Because, for him, how could there be anyone else but her?
...
"Do you see why it could never be you?"
You both stood in front of a monument, surrounded by various plants and objects you assume to be from friends of this ancient goddess.
"I bet she was amazing."
"She was perfect. Perhaps that's why I was not worthy to share a mark with her."
At this point, you were used to his words, how they praise her, how they degrade you.
"You're pretty great too, Zhongli..."
Faith places identical marks on the necks of two soulmates, and the rest is a romantic story of the passion that builds up as people pursue their marks of love.
Fate is cruel to you and him.
"That mark is not for you, Y/N." The Geo Archon says to you, tearing you apart silently, as you stand and take his words.
His heart quivers despite the harsh words coming from his own mouth. Even after millennia of having the mark engraved on his neck, after concluding that maybe he would allow your little seed to prosper even just for a bit, he still chooses to cling onto his hopeless past.
Tears fall down from your eyes, but you remain quiet, only nodding in agreement.
You loathed the mark on your neck.
...
Zhongli opens the cage of his heart a little, allowing him to peak at the small sprout from the seed you planted.
So distinctly you, it was the only thing he has of you.
After letting you leave him at Guizhong's monument with tears still staining your face, he couldn't help but miss you.
He couldn't help but let you finally take your place in his heart, after so long of hating his soulmark, hating whoever the mark tied him to, he fears he has finally accepted faith.
...
"Where is it?" He grips your arm harshly, his hold not faltering as you try to shake him off. His gaze was cold, yet you could still catch the hint of alarm in his eyes. "What have you done?"
After weeks... you return to him... missing something.
You winced at the stress of his words, feeling frightened under his tense hold. "I..." His bruising grip didn't falter, urging you to explain yourself. "S-Surprise...?"
"You..." Zhongli looks at you in disbelief. "How stupid could you be?"
"M-Mr. Zhongli... it's a blessing of the Anemo Archon... I prayed for him set us free from fate."
"Y/N... I..." He was at a loss for words, his heart ached as his eyes searched your neck in vain. "Fate... going against it is painful. It must've been excruciating."
"It was... but this if for you, Zhongli..." You smiled, feeling him loosen his grip. "Because I love... loved you." You fully free yourself from him, rubbing at where he previously held you.
The wind around him picked up, and he hears the faint whispers of an old friend along with it. Whispers of comfort, as he clearly ruined what would have been the light of the rest of his days.
Your soulmark fades, but his remains...
Zhongli loathed his mark, for it bears no meaning, no one but him bears that mark.
As you leave, trying to fade away in the background of his life, you remain under a spotlight in his eyes, for you will always be the one that shares his mark, no matter if it is visible.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
What y'all think of this one? :3
I bet y'all's feelings were hurt hehe
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dark-night-hero · 8 months ago
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"So it's true! You and her- Guizhong were a thing. Then what the hell does that make me Morax?!" "Can you just drop it of? We're in a hurry." He was tired. And their friend was in danger. "No! Knowing you'll be out there to save your other lover, tell me the truth Morax! Is it true?!" It was the same topic of argument for some time now. He had been denying it over and over again, he just cannot seem to understand why you kept insisting even after hearing him say that was not the case. And he was getting tired of it.
Guizhong was just a friend and that very same friend is now in danger if they do not arrive at rhe right time and here he is getting hold up because of your questions. And knowing you would not let him go even if he were to deny it because that was the truth. Maybe he should give in for now to avoid further more questioning and leave as fast as he can so he could come back to you in now time, knowing that he could easily resolve the misunderstanding and his lies. "You know what. It's true. Now if you just get out of the way, I need to save her." "Wha-what? Wa-wait! Morax-!"
He did not mean to be harsh than he already is. He was just mad, mad because he saw no reason why you should get jealous of a friend, a common friend of yours. Mad because he was running late and a little more than to it could possibly result the death of a dear friend. At the same time, he was mad at himself for leaving that way. But he knew he could always explain when he came back into you. The two of you could always sort it out after the battle like you two always does.
So why? So why in the world- celestia were everything was on fire. And you were in the middle of it, leaning on your weapon for support, blood running down all the way from your temple into your chin. It was not just that. You are bleeding, bleeding all over. Why. Why why why why why? Just what the hell happened in here?
"Don't come." You utter, despite the fact that you could barely stand, you painfully look forward to your lover... heh, can he still be called a lover when he already admitted that he betrayed you? "Some..." you pant. "Some beings came into the city while you were away... hahh, I manage to defend the city until all the people manage to flee but- cough! Hahh, the god manage to escape."
"No. No no no no no." It was getting hard to breathe, nevertheless you should see Morax from afar, running towards you. "Bastard- I told you not to come he-!" You stagger forward, for a moment losing consciousness, still, you embrace yourself with the thought of you hitting the ground. But you never did.
"Let go." "It was a lie. There was no one else." "Morax- I said-" "I was in a hurry, I did not mean to say those words. Guizhong was only a friend. Believe me. God- Celestia. There is no one else. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please don't leave me." He was hugging, cradling you in his arms. His tears rolling down his cheeks, into your own but you were feeling quite numb to notice that.
"It's..." You tried to hold up a hand but you could only feel the pain and the more it drains you. In the end you could only hold on into his arm. "It's okay... you don't have to lie to make me... feel better." You tried to smile to make him feel better, so why does it look like he was about to lose his whole world? "No. No please. It's nothing like that. I was a fool, I am a fool. Please believe me there is no one else but you. (First name). Please."
You knew he was talking, you can see him talking despite how things were slowly starting to go blurr, you can hear a few words but cannot seemed to focus on it when there is a high pitched ring that makes you unable to focus on what he was saying. Also, "It's cold." You mumble, fighting everything you can to stay conscious.
"Fuck!" Morax can feel your body slowly but surely cooling down. Suddenly his heart dropped as he panicked, he was getting anxious. He felt fear for the first time in his life. "Hold on, please hold on." He tried, he tried his best to fix you with his powers but it was no avail. You have so many wounds, you have already lost a lot of blood. You were dying all ago. "Fuck." He cursed once again. "Fuck, fuck! I told you to hold on (First name)!" He was getting mad again.
Morax felt like he was going mad, he felt like he was about to get crazy. Specially when he saw you starting to close your eyes. He felt a shiver down his spine. "Don't you dare close your eyes (First name)!" Not like this, not when you seemed to sure that he never loved- love you. "Fuck!" His amber iris were glowing with that presence of a dragon. "Don't you dare fell asleep (First name). I'm begging you please-?" He felt a light squeeze on his arm.
"Its.. okay." Taking your last breath, Morax felt the heavy weight of your now dead body in his arms. Your hand falling to your side as your head rest in his chest. At that very moment a rain drop fell from the sky, Morax arms were trembling yet still manage to pull you closer to him as if trying to find a little warmth. "Hah, hahaha. HAHAHAHAHAHA."
That day, the dragon lost his mate. His one and only mate as his anguish cries were heard all throughout their land.
[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2024°
: bye, may klase pa ko ng alas quatro sa hapon.
: Also, why is it always zhongli who become the victim of my angst ideas. Tho I might make a same promt with ???
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saetoru · 1 year ago
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underground fighter wriothesley who absolutely melts whenever you patch him up n place the softest kisses over his bruises n stuff :((
- 🦋 anon
✩ ‧₊˚ ✩ WE, NOT I — WRIOTHESLEY.
contents. underground fighter! wriothesley, gn! reader (he gifts you flowers, perfume and a necklace though, so if that is fem! coded to you, there’s your warning), mentions of foster care and being orphaned (wriothesley), mentions of blood, bruises, and injuries (wriothesley), slight angst but overall fluff ending
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money’s tight—has been for a while, actually. wriothesley doesn’t like to talk about it, doesn’t like to open up even though he knows you won’t think any less of him. but you notice the small things, always do.
it’s the way you buy groceries for two, the way he’s always over for dinner one way or another, the way he seems to spend more and more time at your place than his. money’s tight, even if he doesn’t like to admit it—and you could never force it out of him, but you think letting him stay with you while he can could help ease the burden of living even if a little.
he’s grateful—a little roundabout in the ways he shows it, but grateful all the same.
and then the presents start to come.
it’s small at first: those expensive macarons you like from that bakery, the bouquet of roses that couldn’t be cheap, a nice dinner he insists he can pay for every once in a while. and then it starts to get bigger: fancy tea from the side of town neither of you even think about shopping at, perfume from a brand you can’t even pronounce, a necklace that’s more than what you can afford yourself.
it starts out slow, and then all at once, wriothesley has what you imagine to be more money than he knows what to do with. because why else spoil you like this? why else blow money on things for you when he could be putting it towards himself?
not everyone gets to have a head start at life—wriothesley is proof of that. it’s hard, more than most people realize, to be orphaned so young and move through foster home after foster home. he’d gone to jail once too—he doesn’t talk about that either, and you never ask. it’s hard, more than anyone gives him credit for, to be knocked down by life so many times and make a living for yourself.
you can’t understand where the sudden change comes from, can’t pinpoint where along the line he started getting so comfortable. it’s not unwelcome, you would never want to watch him just barely scrap by, but it concerns you how he seems to have so much all at once.
and then you get your answer.
“what—what happened to you?” you ask in disbelief, eyeing the blood caked by his nose and around his knuckles. that’s the best of it, unfortunately—the gashes on his chest and the bruises somehow look even worse.
you’d consider him lucky that his ribs don’t seem cracked.
“just a fight,” he shrugs, not meeting your eyes. wriothesley is a lot of things: resourceful, conniving at times, and braver than most. good at lying is not one of them, however—at least not with you. “just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“where were you, then?” you challenge, staring at him hard enough that he doesn’t have to meet your eyes to shuffle uncomfortably in his spot. he doesn’t answer. you’re almost fed up. “wriothesley,” you say in a warning tone.
there’s a sense of finality he doesn’t like.
“what happened to wrio, sweetheart? you’re killin’ me here, i come home to you all bruised up and you’re here beating me down harder—”
“wriothesley, i’m worried about you,” you whisper tiredly. it’s defeated—it’s almost helpless. he frowns, finally looking up at you from his place between your legs as you sit on the bathroom counter.
“you don’t have to be,” he mumbles, “i can take care on my own. i always have.”
“there’s no being on your own when we’re together,” you shake your head. your hands fall to either side of your body, shoulders slumping in exhaustion. “don’t you understand? neither of us is supposed to be on our own anymore—not when the other is here.”
“yeah,” he crosses his arms—you try to ignore the wince he lets out as he moves, “and now you’re not handling things on your own anymore. i’m carrying my weight. just need to fight a guy or two.”
“you’re carrying your weight by fighting?” you blink at the realization. he doesn’t look you in your eyes, keeping them trained on the floor again. “oh my god—is that what these are from? because….because you’re fighting some punks in the middle of the night? that’s illegal—and you could get in trouble again—”
he doesn’t seem to like being reminded of his past. that’s clear when he clicks his teeth and glares at you. “and what am i supposed to do, stay cooped up in your place and eat your food?” he asks bitterly, making your brows furrow.
“not necessarily, but you can—”
“what, so i just live paycheck to paycheck and shower at your place and sleep in your bed so my water and electricity bills aren’t too high for the month?”
“wrio—”
“i’m earning, aren’t i? what’s the big deal?”
“the big deal is this,” you wave your hand exasperatedly, tears welling up by the lash line of your eyes as you stare at his bruises with trembling lips, “look at you. it’s not worth it if you come back to me like this.”
“but i come back,” he mumbles, taking your hand—he kisses the knuckles, rubs a rough thumb over the smooth skin before laying your palm against his cheek and sighing. “i always come back.”
you love wriothesley—have since the day you met him, you think. he’s easy to fall for like that, to feel your stomach go in twists and knots every time he makes a sarcastic joke and throws you a charming smile. life has been tough on the man you love, unfairly so. it’s hit him harder and harder and pushed him back to his knees before he ever got a chance to fully stand up.
he’s hitting back, now. maybe in a more literal sense than you’d hoped, but….but maybe you can help him if you can’t change him. maybe you can keep the pieces together until the plaster holds and they’re not so fragile anymore.
“i don’t like seeing you hurt,” you whisper, leaning in to kiss the broken skin on his cheekbone, “you don’t have to do all this. we were doing okay before that.”
we. he shudders at that. it’s always we and never i—even when you did all the heavy lifting. even when he was barely getting by and you were giving more than you should’ve had to, more than he should’ve needed. it’s always we. never i.
you and him.
“i know,” he melts, humming as your fingers thread into his tousled hair, scratching his scalp as he buries his face into your neck, “just let me save a bit more. and then i’ll do something real with myself. i promise.”
you pull away after a bit, taking in every bruise and every cut, every dry patch of blood and swollen patch of skin. it’s shaky at first, your voice when you finally speak.
“‘s all bruised,” you say quietly, running a finger over the marks littering his chest. he’s painfully still—doesn’t move a muscle as you lean in slowly and press a kiss to the purplish stain on his skin, gently trailing them to the next one, and the next one, and the next one. “you don’t deserve all this.”
“yeah?” he chuckles—its breathy, a little strained. your arms loop around his waist and bring him closer, “what a sweet thing,” he coos, “nobody ever treats me so gentle.”
you frown at that. the world is not gentle with wriothesley—you’ll have to be extra gentle to make up for it.
“you’ll be safe? you’ll pull out when it’s too much, right? and you’ll come back? without being too hurt, right? wrio, you can’t—”
“yeah, yeah, i got it,” he huffs, pressing his forehead to yours, letting your hands cup his cheeks. he leans closer to your touch, shudders as you slowly trace his cheek with your thumb, “just wait at home all pretty for me, yeah? i’ll bring you back something nice.”
“bring me back yourself in once piece,” you huff.
“done,” he smiles, “i’m strong, if you haven’t noticed.”
“yeah? explain this,” you challenge, pressing down on a bruise and making him wince.
“you should see the other guy,” he whines, burying his face back into your neck. you roll your eyes, there’s a scoff in your throat but a smile on your lips.
wriothesley is safe—for now, that’s all you can ask for.
“i love you,” you mumble, “so much. no matter what, okay?”
“no need to get so emotional on me, baby,” he chuckles—and then there’s a tightening of strong arms around your body, a kiss pressed delicately to your neck before a soft, “but i love you too” is murmured into your skin.
“i hope you’re ready to clean those cuts. they’ll sting for sure,” you grumble as you pull away. he grins—handsome, charming, yours.
“will you kiss them better?” he bats his lashes, making you snort.
“no.”
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i might make this a reoccurring drabble series too idk yet. anyway you know what else he can beat up ?? this pussy ;)
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zweetpea · 5 months ago
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miscommunication trope!
So imagine… you’re just a normal person in Fontaine and you have a crush on Neuvillette.
After seeing him in public a few times you work up the courage to talk to him and your really nervous so you start rambling. And just when you think you’ve messed it up Neuvillette strokes your head. Kinda like someone would a dog.
You don’t realize this because you’re on cloud nine. So then every time you’re in public you go up to him and start talking and by the end of the conversation he ends up patting your head.
After a few months of this going on you start to hear gossip that Neuvillette sees you as a pet and that’s why he does that. It utterly crushes you. You don’t even want to be around him anymore for the fear of humiliation.
Poor Neuvillette didn’t mean it like that though. He just finds your ramblings cute and wants to touch you.
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primofate · 2 months ago
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Warning: angsty
You've been isekai'd to Teyvat.
For whatever reason it is, and whatever fantasy you've had of being whisked away into another world.
Maybe you woke up one day under the tree in Windrise.
Maybe you hated your life so much you wished so hard to be somewhere else and when you opened your eyes you were in the streets of Liyue.
Or maybe it was an unfortunate accident and you found yourself floating in the seas of Fontaine.
Regardless, you choose who picks you up.
Is it Diluc, who somehow finds you passed out in his vineyard?
Kinich who catches you when you just start falling out of the sky?
Alhaitham, who thinks it troublesome that he has to get you acquainted with Sumeru and the Akademiya?
Scaramouche who was suddenly led by the Aranara to where you appeared in the forest and slept?
You might think that going to a new world, Teyvat, of all places, would be exciting, but in reality, it would be frightening too.
No friends. No family. Monsters are out to get you. Nowhere to live.
Your chosen person, however, manages to keep you safe. Manages to get you more familiar with the world. Manages to build your life up in this unknown place.
They've taken care of you, have become your friend. Have become a lifeline for you.
Though some of them may bark and complain about how you know nothing at all, or seem to scoff at your problems. (Scaramouche, Xiao, Alhaitham)
And some might be hot or cold. You don't know if they care or not, cause sometimes they're nice, and the next they pull away (Diluc, Dainsleif, Kazuha)
Then there's ones who genuinely have taught you about Teyvat. Have integrated your existence into their every day life. (Tighnari, Neuvillette, Baizhu, Kaveh, Thoma)
And the ones who gave you purpose. Since you're here now, it's important to feel that you belong. (Wriothesley, Zhongli, Albedo, Cyno, Kinich)
In some ways because they were the ones who found you they do feel responsible for you. Inevitably, you spend a lot of time together. Where he goes, you usually go too, sometimes even in dangerous situations.
And so, what happens then, when, one day, out of the blue, you tell him:
"I found a way back home,"
By that time he might have already forgotten that you weren't from this world. That you had somewhere to go back to. That you could actually disappear just as easily as you appeared into his life. That next to him was not really your original place.
So, what then?
(I'd write this for every male character if I had the time)
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affableramen · 1 month ago
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asking them if they actually love you
fluffy angst, established relationships wriothesley, neuvillette, pantalone, capitano, dottore
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Wriothesley
The duke was working at his desk in his private office when you walked in with no lively expression on your face. Wriothesley tore his eyes off from the cup of tea and saw you looking expressively exhausted.
“Wow, someone’s had a tough day”, he chuckled, “you look exhausted, babe.”
Ignoring his childish manner you asked him rather simply:
“Wrio, I have just one question. Do you even love me?”
Wriothesley choked on his tea.
“Love you? Of course I—I do.”
You did not have to question his frankness as Wriothesley has always been an explicitly blunt person. He would never lie in such occasions and certainly would tell you if he disliked something.
Having received his answer on the wobbly legs but with a contented smile, you lurked to his desk and hugged him from the side.
“Wrio, I’m just so tired and I’m in diiiire need of your cuddles.” You surprised him with a nice peck to his cheek.
Seeing you giving in to stress and overwhelmed all over Wriothesley could not help but started feeling upset too. He gently pulled your face close to him, his big gloved hand laid on your cheek in a loving way.
“Girl, someone has been working non-stop I see. Or should I say studying? M?”
He was clearly not happy with your sufferings. Being a workaholic himself Wriothesley knew how easy it is to overwhelm oneself. But he did not want this fate for you. Due to the sudden friction of you leaning to his chest to get sense of comfort, the work papers from Wriothesley’s desk had dropped onto the floor. You were lucky the ink remained still.
“Oops. Seems like you wanted to hug me so much you did not spare the poor sheets.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, Wrio!”
“Ah, whatever.” He looked down indifferently. “Girl, I will not calm down until I make sure you’re in your bed, sleeping.”
“I’ll be fine. I can get home on my own.”
Wriothesley raised from his desk and discreetly walked you out of his office.
“I’m going to get you home and you’ll rest. That is unnegotiable.”
Neuvillette
Neuvillette was a closed, solitary man who experienced some difficulties when it came to relationship dynamics. Deep inside his heart he was, nonetheless, a pure romantic. He’d always come to your dates earlier, looking nothing but polished; and with incredibly serious (but polite) manner he would court you.
He was always a husband material and he let you know how important you are in his life any time he could. He was dedicated to you wholeheartedly, and even though at first time you were much scared off by his cold, aloof, professional-like appearance, later you found yourself falling in love with him too, until the both of you grew tightly attached to each other.
You knew you should not question or doubt his affections, but you had a terrible day and you only saw your world dark and hollow. It was when your shift ended that Neuvillette entered your office only to find you drowning in your work overtime. Or perhaps—no, it was your studies, your homework.
“Darling, were you doing your studies at work? I thought we’d agree that you would not overexert yourself.”
“I know…” you mumble, caffeine in you refusing to help anymore. “But at home I want to sleep. So when I finished my paperwork, I started doing my studies.”
“I see.” Neuvillette walked closely and took a look at your work sheets. “Dear, you have some mistakes here…But that’s not important now. I’ll give you a lift to home.”
You looked at Neuvillette bewildered.
“Home?”
“It’s evening already.”
“Neuvillette—” you asked him when he gently pulled you out from the desk by your hand. He gave you a surprised look. Judging by your face you were dead serious about asking something, so he kept quiet, letting you speak. “Do you like, love me?”
He was flustered at first, but only mildly. Neuvillette cleared his throat and adjusting his collar he answered with the equal seriousness:
“That I do. Why, have I made you doubt my affections?”
“No. I was just messing with you… I’m having a bad day.”
“I love you”, he said as if picking up your disappointed mood, he continued confessing to you in a frenzy: “I love you, I love you, I love you.” He smooched your cheek before leading you out of the office. “And I will make sure you won’t overwhelm yourself like today.”
Pantalone
“Do you even love me…” you wonder out loud, your chin laying on your arm as you’re doing the paper work.
“Love is a foolish concept for foolish people. It only softens your senses and makes you miserable. I cannot afford being miserable, vulnerable or weak”, Pantalone responds—his words a well-polished conviction he made himself believe in. Although, his looks is harsh on you and he states that in a rough manner, his gaze does not leave your exhausted image not for a moment of time.
Tired and exhausted, you are lying on the desk before the papers.
“So now you’re collapsing on my desk? Did no one teach you proper manners?” he inquires with a tone so ambiguous and indefinite that no one can truly guess if he’s fooling around or scolding you quite seriously.
“So you don’t”, you respond quietly. What were you even thinking… Of course a Harbinger—especially one of the oldest, probably no longer sensitive to feelings—Regrator would ever love you.
“There’s no point of me loving you, really. Love’s a poison, and I cannot let myself be poisoned, for there are many people who’d prefer me dead. I suffered too many assassination attempts to grow a sense of preservation in myself. Besides, where have you heard about love in business?” As always, the talkative man he is Pantalone would not stop blabbering a second. But seeing you close your eyes as he came closer, he whispered quietly, but audible enough for you to hear:
“I love you.”
Perhaps he did not even consider the words which slipped so fast from his lips. He wanted to cover his mouth shut to hide his embarrassment, but then he did not see a point in this.
“Thanks…” said the sleepy you, the next second falling asleep on the papers. “I … love you… too…”
“You’re an idiot. When will you stop mixing work and studies? Come, I’ll get you to bed.”
He gently pulled you into his arms and carried you through the dimly lit corridor. He placed you on your silky bed sheets, his hand moving to caress your cheek.
“You need to take better care of yourself. You can’t keep being so overwhelmed with both work and university. Now, sleep.”
He kisses your cheek, his lips linger for a few moments…
“I’m so exhausted.”
“I know. Sleep, my dear.”
He switched the lights off and slowly raised from the bed, afraid to do any friction that would tear you off from the sleepy state.
Capitano
“Capitano”, you called him from the middle of the living room, while you were studying near the fireplace.
He was just about to enter the room when you side eyed him and the familiar smell of spicy perfume seemed to fill the half of the air.
“Do you even love me, Capitano?”
He stood there, frozen at your question, not knowing what to respond because you usually would not have audacity to ask him something way too personal. It must have been a damn good reason for you to strike him so deeply.
“Hmph. What do you think?” He stopped in the frame of the entrance, his big arms crossed as he leaned onto the frame.
“I don't know, you tell me.” You did not tear your gaze of the book, as if taunting him. But he did not suspect that you were genuinely exhausted at that moment and sook to be comforted.
“Do you think I’d let you lurk in my house on weekends if I did not? Do you think I would ask my servants to prepare the finest meals for you, neatly accordingly to your allergies?” He grunts, unsatisfied and irritated. “Do you think I’d even let you talk to me so boldly if I did not want you by my side?”
You finally raised your head at him, leaving the book behind and gave him a satisfied but undoubtedly cunning smile.
“Capitano, my love, you’re so cute when you’re grumpy.”
“I just don't see a point in asking something so obvious.”
“You and your rational thinking. What if I just wanted to hear you sweet talking to me?”
Capitano was speechless. He knew how cunning you could be, but he did not even imagine that you would be taunting him so badly.
“I’ve had a difficult day. Too much studies, too little rest. I have not much time before exams so I am constantly stressing.”
“You don't have your deserved rest because you kept working even being a student. You need to choose one, woman.”
You sighed at Capitano. How many times did you have to explain to him?..
“I know, but I told you I want to have some cash of my own. I don't want to constantly ask you to buy something for me.”
“But your work kills you. You give so much effort for university, and you give as much to your work. This is unacceptable for your health.” His tone is cold with seriousness. You know he wouldn't change his mind just as you wouldn't change yours.
“Fine, perhaps I’ll work two days instead of three. But Capitano, stop standing there like a statue, sit down next to me. My mind is at peace when you are close.”
“Even if I am simply… sitting here? Doing nothing at all?”
“Even so. But I think you already know that you could hug me since I haven't seen you the whole day~.”
Dottore
“Do you even love me, Dottore?” you asked him plainly with no ceremonies. For a moment Dottore’s hand froze as he was holding the vial. He was standing there in his white medical gown as he mixed some fluids. After a few long moments he finally gave you an answer, his tone indifferent, but you could not see his expression behind the white safety mask.
“You know perfectly I only love science.”
“Guess I should have expected that ans—”
“But I love you. Perhaps, a little less than science, but I do. And I hope you know that”, he cleared his throat, “why’d you even ask that on the first place?”
You took a few steps closer to Dottore, silently lurking behind his back, fearing to ruin his test, but you could not escape his sharp senses.
“What are you doing?”
“Nothing. Continue with your experiment.”
“Uh-huh.” Dottore finally poured the fluids and mixed them properly. When the experiment finished he took his gloves off and you quickly wrapped your arms around his waist before he could run away from you.
“What’s wrong with you?” he asked, flustered enough to want his face hidden somewhere far from your eyes.
“I missed you, besides I’m very tired. If you don’t want to hug me back, then just stay like this and let me squeeze you.”
Nothing could express Dottore’s astonishment right now. He was most embarrassed, and he is not at all used to such extravagant signs of affections.
“Y/N you fool, careful with where you’re standing, my whole lab is not a playground.”
“I love you too, Dottore.” You delivered a peck to his cheek from behind. That action made Dottore boil immensely, and he finally turned around and leaned against his desk.
“Did something or someone upset you? You don’t usually act so rapidly.”
“Just a bad day in general. I’m exhausted and hungry too. But at least you told me you love me.”
Dottore sighed through teeth. He disliked a mere idea of you being stressed out. He wanted to cheer you up but his heart did not have capacity enough for much open affection.
“Okay, brat. How about we grab a dinner somewhere together? You wanna hot food?”
There were sudden sparkles in your eyes - the only offer from Dottore’s lips made you all shake with excitement and your frustration seemed to brush off.
“I would love to eat out with you right now, Dott.”
“Well in that case”, he glared at you and hissed, “let me finish my job properly. Wait in the vestibule.”
Grinning, you escaped his lab with fast pace, seeing Dottore roll his eyes at your childish excitement.
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vsimp · 1 year ago
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bitter
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pairing: kamisato ayato x f!reader
wc: 3k
genre: angst
summary: where you are in an arranged marriage with him and you rarely ever see him
warning: somewhat traditional housewife roles, negative thoughts
part 2
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What a cruel fate it was, to fall in love with a man who neither loves or hates you.
To spend long, cold nights alone. A large, indifferent room divided by two separate futons.
You knew that your husband was a busy man. He worked all night, barely resting during the day, and every time you’ve caught glimpse of his office, there was always a huge mess laying around on his desk. But having been married to him for such a long time, you felt that the distance between you two grew longer and longer every day.
In the morning, you would greet him with the biggest smile you could muster. He would greet you back with the same gentle smile everyday. At this point, you knew what his real smile looked like. You don’t recall when the last time he’s ever given you one.
If Miss Ayaka and Thoma were busy, and you dined alone with your husband, the table would be silent. You didn’t know what to say, and he’d also be reading over papers while eating, so you were afraid to disturb him. If the two were present, or if there were any other guests, Ayato would be more active in the conversation, joking lightheartedly and appearing like he was actually enjoying himself.
This man did not treat you unkindly despite having these feelings that lurked in your chest. In fact, it was the opposite. He was a true gentleman every time you interacted with him. He would open the door for you while you two walked together. He would pull out the chair when you wanted to sit. He would hold your hand and escort you to any event, or if you were getting on/off a carriage.
But it was all superficial. It felt like he was forcing himself to do these actions for you. You couldn’t even tell what his intentions are for doing so. You couldn’t tell if he just disliked you, disliked this arranged marriage, or if he just wanted people to see what a loving husband he was, that everything was okay right now even though it really wasn’t.
From touchless nights to meaningless small talk, your heart ached at the thought of everything. You don’t ever recall the last time he’s kissed you on the lips in private. You don’t recall the last time he’s ever opened up to you about the depths of his heart, from the things that scared him the most, to the things that has made him truly happy.
And while you know that a relationship thrives off of communication, you couldn’t help but feel scared. You were scared that the man in front of you would grow even colder, shutting off the depths of his heart forever, pushing you away if you were to ever confront him. Maybe he’d even take it to an extreme and call off the marriage with you, telling you that he never loved you, as this was really only an arrangement between your two families. Maybe he was in love with someone else prior to this marriage, and he has only reserved his heart for them all of these years.
You have seen his darker sides. He doesn’t think that anyone has noticed, but you have. You were always watching him, after all.
A more mischievous side of him existed deep down in there, a certain sly foxiness that could even rival Guuji Yae herself. Sometimes, it would scare you to see that forced smile on his face as if what lingered in his mind were true thoughts darker than what he had initially led on.
But despite his flaws, despite the mask he constantly wore around, you loved him. You loved him so much it hurt. You loved how he cared for people despite them being complete strangers to him. You loved his gentle smile as he holds your hand so tenderly when you accidentally trip. How could a man be so kind, yet so cruel to your heart?
And even as you laid in bed most nights alone, shedding tears as if you were the dark side of the crystal moon longing for the light of the sun, you still loved him regardless.
You were in your futon all alone as of this moment, staring at the ceiling. The room was pitch black and silent, other than the occasional sounds of the residual droplets from the passing rain. Ayato would never let you rest in a room that was cold, so the temperature was heated comfortably, yet you couldn’t help but bundle yourself up under the covers even more.
It was cold without him. You didn’t even realize when the last time he had actually went to bed in this room you both allegedly shared.
But it didn’t matter anyways because his futon laid far away from yours.
Your own husband wouldn’t even come near you when you’re together in the same room. You didn’t know if he just wanted to be respectful as a formality between husband and wife, or if he is repulsed by being in the same vicinity as you, but it hurt regardless.
You sighed as you covered your face with the blanket, trying to get rid of these harboring thoughts. It was no use, no matter what you did, you couldn’t stop thinking about your relationship with him every single night. He is what plagues your mind at night, like a thorn lodged deep in a fingertip. It was only soon that you will be bleeding out your love for him.
How could you make a scene about all of this anyways? You've seen how hard he works. You knew that everything he did, it was for the sake of protecting his family and home. Who were you to complain about how busy he was? That was another reason why you continued to keep silent. You thought that your worries meant nothing compared to his own.
Your mind was racing a mile per minute, and you knew you weren't able to get any sleep like this. You got up and out of your futon as you decided to go for a stroll around the estate. The guards protected the outside and prevented from anybody from coming in. As long as you walked around inside, there should be no problem with you strolling the corridors, so long as you remained quiet.
Lighting up a candle, you started meandering through the halls, your footsteps nearly silent with no goal or destination in mind. You didn't even realize your feet had automatically taken you to the doors of his office, the same door that you have stared at many times, knowing that your husband was in there, but you had no reason or courage to open. You see the dimly lit light through the translucent paper sheets, and you knew that tonight was going to be another long night with no rest for him.
You sighed, not remembering the last time you had been in his office, and you were about to step away, but the door suddenly slides open rather violently. You flinch in shock because you didn’t expect for anything to happen, as he usually never notices your presence.
"Who is there?" He said in a serious tone, and you were finally greeted by the man who plagued your every thought and dreams. His hand laid on the hilt of his sword, almost as if he was ready to strike down any intruder who was lurking in the shadows. But instead of drawing his sword, he blinked a few times, realizing it was just you who stood there. He instantly let go of the sword and his expression relaxed a bit, although his eyebrows were furrowed slightly to show confusion. "Y/n? What are you doing here? It is almost 2am right now."
His presence stunned you for a second before you snapped out of the current awe-struck daze you were in. It had been quite a while since you've seen his face. He was rarely home anymore, but when he was, he would be holed up in his office. You only ever see him to greet him when he returned back home, and sometimes when he leaves, as he had a habit of sneaking out secretly every so often.
"Oh." You were flustered at this unexpected situation. "I had trouble sleeping, so I decided to go for a walk..."
"Is something troubling you?" He asked in concern. "If it is work-related with the household, then I know Ayaka would be happy to give you a hand.”
"It's not that..." You shook your head. You didn't want him to worry about you, so you tell him a small lie. "It's just one of those nights..."
"I see."
"Have you been faring well?" You then asked him.
He gave you a small, gentle smile, but you have seen this many times. It was one of the masks he wore when he wasn’t telling the truth.
"I've been doing alright," he replied. Anybody would've believed him, as he would never appear disheveled in front of anybody, but from the way his eyes had a slight dark tint underneath them and the mess that apparently was his desk with papers and pens strewn everywhere, you knew that he was far from so. "I was actually looking to take a break soon from my paperwork. Since you probably will be up for a little bit, would you care to join me?"
An invitation from him was rare, and you immediately jumped ship. You nodded. "Let me go prepare some tea."
"Oh, there's no need to do that."
"Nonsense," you gave him a reassuring smile, knowing what he was going to say. He was so considerate as always, not wanting to trouble you. "It will only be a few.”
You start to walk down the hall to head to the kitchen, but you were surprised to hear footsteps behind you. Before you knew it, Ayato was walking beside you, and you could hear your heart thumping in your chest.
"Ayato?" You questioned.
It was dim, as the candle was the only thing that lit the dark halls, so you can barely make out his expression.
"I'll tag along with you then." He said softly, as to not wake anybody else up. "It will be a good change of pace from being stuck in my office all night."
To you, he was so hard to read at times. If he was accompanying you, he surely must have his reasons, as he had never used any of his personal time on you before. He only accompanied you outside when he had a special meeting at an event that required for both spouses to arrive. Those were the only times when he was somewhat affectionate. That was why you were nervous when he decided to come along with you, thinking he had an ulterior motive like he usual does. But a small, small part of you hoped that it was something else; that he wanted to join you because he missed you and just wanted to idly chat.
You stepped into the kitchen and then lit a brighter lantern to illuminate the room using your own candle. But before you could do anything else, you watched as Ayato's hand pushed a portion of your hair aside. You couldn't help but feel your cheeks heat up at the action, your eyes making its way towards him now that you were able to see his face.
He wore a gentle smile on his face as he looked down at you tenderly. A rare expression indeed, you’ve only noted him to give this look to Ayaka. It made your heart hurt a little as it thumped away in your chest, feeling like you could soar to the moon and never come back.
"Your hair was getting close to the flames, so I didn't want it to burn,” he explained.
"Oh..." You didn't know what else you could say. "Thank you..."
With that, you started boiling the kettle of water, your body moving to find tea leaves. Ayato watches on without speaking a word, and you two drift into a somewhat lulling silence.
As you prepared your leaves, Ayato interrupted the silence no sooner than later.
“There’s another event that the Kanjou Commission is hosting,” he said. There it was. He needed you to attend another political event with him. You were once so naive to think that he would actually spend time with you just because he wanted to. You knew he hated small talk and would rather get straight to the point. “I was hoping you wouldn’t mind attending it with me.”
Of course you didn’t mind, if it meant that you would be spending more time with him. But even if you did expect for this, you were still disappointed.
“Sure. When will it be?”
“In two months. They’re hosting a party event to discuss upcoming financial plans for the winter.”
You nodded, your hands a little rougher than usual as you crushed up the dried tea leaves in the mortar. Usually you would hide your emotions well, but it definitely showed in the way you pounded at the leaves.
If Ayato had noticed your switch in moods, he didn’t say anything. Instead, he went over to the cabinet to grab two cups for the tea.
“I appreciate it. Let me know if there’s anything else I can do for you.”
Another blatant lie fueled only by courtesy. He always says this whenever you did a favor for him. If you were to truly ask for a favor, he would have Thoma somehow fulfill it, or he would say that he was too busy to do it himself, and that he would make it up later. He would send a gift, picked out by either Thoma or Ayaka of course, to later apologize for not fulfilling your promise.
And although it has only happened four or five times before you’d stop asking him for favors, knowing that he was too busy to fulfill them, it still left a bitter feeling within you.
You felt that it was selfish for you to feel this way. You knew that he had lost his parents at a young age, having to resume the role as the leader of the Yashiro Commission and head of the Kamisato Clan very early in life. You thought it wasn’t right for you to feel bitter about small things like this. Yet, as you glanced at the man in front of you, who barely looked at you and instead stared at the bright full moon outside, your heart ached at this solemn expression— one that loomed with fatigue and tiredness.
Maybe what you truly longed for was his happiness. Maybe you wanted to share that happiness with him, although you knew it would be a long shot. So long as he was the head of the Yashiro Commission, the leader of the Shuumatsuban, there will always be a distance between you two, as he prioritized things differently from any other typical person. Even though he was in the same room as you right now, as the moon peaked through the small window, the cicadas singing in the distance, he still looked as alone as ever. Like there was an unmeasurable length between you two, and you were too afraid to cross it, in fear that you would never be able to reach him.
The kettle soon starts to heat up, and you take it off the flame to start steeping the tea leaves. A few minutes of silence passed, and you wondered then if he was going to leave immediately after he finished his tea. It was still hot, so you had a couple more minutes left with him, right?
You poured the tea carefully in the cup and then proceeded to hand it over to him.
“It’s hot, so be careful.”
“Thank you,” he smiled at you and graciously accepted the tea. He picked it up to his lips, blowing it a few times as he inhaled the scent. “This smells like a different type of tea than the one you served at the event the other day.”
You remembered that event. You were attending a birthday party for an old couple who were close friends with the Kamisato’s. You brewed that tea with extra care, knowing that Ayato was going to drink it on that very occasion.
“It was truly delicious,” he complimented and you felt your heart soar at his words once more. “I know I never told you this, but it was one of my favorite hot teas.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” I smiled, making note to remember that information. “This one that I brewed helps with stress and calms the mind.”
He took a sip once the tea is cooled down a bit more. “I can see how this one can have that effect. It’s a very mild, but calming flavor. It’s a good choice for you to brew this, since it will probably help you sleep.”
Actually, you had brewed it for him, so that he wouldn’t stress so much, but you held your tongue back. Instead, you took a sip of the hot tea, trying to match his pace so that you both could finish at the same time.
“I hope you like it,” you said.
“I do enjoy it quite a bit,” he replied with a small smile on his face. “I will take it to my office and savor it. I appreciate you willing to spend time with me.”
“It’s my pleasure.”
“I hope you get some sleep soon, and try not to stay awake for too long,” your husband stated. “Please pardon me, I must return to my work.”
You forced out a smile in return, knowing that he had cut his time off with you short on purpose.
“Have a good night, Ayato.”
He gave a small nod as he walked out with the tea in his hand. You waited for the door to fully shut before you leaned on the counter with your back pressed to it.
He didn't even wait to finish the tea before he left. He just went straight to the point, pushing you aside as if your feelings had never mattered to him in the first place.
Your hands gripped the ceramic tea cup tightly. It felt like if you had held it tight enough, it would shatter and break, scalding your skin like the way your husband did just now.
Your tears dripped into the tea, the salty solution messing with the delicate taste of the drink as you sipped it, not wanting anything to go to waste. What was once a calming, smooth taste was now bitter.
So, so bitter.
It was another cruel, lonely night that awaited you.
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part 2
6K notes · View notes
leafzu · 15 days ago
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Il Capitano, the First of the Eleven Fatui Harbingers.
The man you were betrothed to, well sold to to be precise by your parents. In order to gain the Tsaritsa's favor.
The man before you frightened you to say the least. He did not speak a word to you upon his arrival 'till now. Tall, dressed in dark clothes, face hidden, he was a mystery.
The chandelier above you sparkled, moonlight dancing across it as you walked towards him slowly. The man before you, dressed in black as always.
The wedding was nothing fancy. By the blessings of her majesty the Tsaritsa, you were wedded under the moonlight in a dark cathedral. The only white being the the moon and your moon bathed white wedding dress. Veil sparkling, the pain hidden underneath. Such a sorrowful face.
Weddings are supposed to be happy and full of love.
Love? You were a fool to think that love was written in the stars for you. How could you ever love the man in front. You were anything but a bride. A caged bird.
“This is where you will be staying.” A room bigger than your own. The moon can be seen clearly from the large windows. It was a beautiful room but a soulless one. “I presume you are going to be alright from here?” The first time he was talking to you. You nodded silently not wanting to talk. “If there's anything you're in need of, do not hesitate to ask. This is your home now.”
Home. Home was lost to you a long time ago.
The Captain was a man of very few words, but he wasn't ignorant. You were his wife, it was his responsibility to tend to you. And much to your surprise he never held you back from anything. You were free to do as you wish. Suddenly it didn't seem so bad being married to The Captain.
The Mansion became more livelier each day with your presence. It wasn't dark and empty as it was before. A little light was let in, flowers grew in the gardens, lively chatter could be heard.
The Captain was not ignorant. He was very evident of the changes around him, but paid no heed to it. He did not seem to mind and let you do as you wished to. Though, he would be lying if he said he didn't like the liveliness.
The relationship between you took time and effort to bloom. You didn't find him as intimidating as before and he started to see more than just someone to look after as a responsibility.
The Captain was emotionally distant to say the least. Attachments were something he strongly avoided. Being stripped of everything from the cataclysm 500 years ago made him into who he is today. His past appearance and self long gone.
Still, you manage to bring out a side to him he never thought he had before. Your smile, your presence, to him they bring a sense of...comfort? Not realizing it completely, he was starting to long for something more. And it could be said the same on your part.
The Captain was a mystery to you. From his appearance to him as a person, you didn't know anything about him.
Small conversations shared in the gardens was the only thing you had with him. Though it was mostly you who conversed. The Captain was a man of few words but he enjoyed listening to you. He became fond of it and slowly your time in the gardens only became longer.
“Red roses are meant to symbolize true love.” You looked up at The Captain sitting beside you in your garden. The Captain let you do as you wished with the gardens from your arrival. It was something that soothed the ache in your heart and brought happiness to you. The Gardens became more beautiful and full of life with your touch.
“And lilies are meant to symbolize innocence and purity.”
He saw you in the lilies, planted in a small area beside the garden pavilion. White lilies, very few of them planted.
His hand close to yours while you told him about the language of flowers. You wanted to touch his hands, a little part of it. Maybe a finger? But as you inched your hands closer to his, The Captain took notice of it and quickly retreated his hands.
“Ahem, I have a meeting to attend to. I will see you at dinner.” Left alone in the garden, the rejection of your touch hit deep within your heart. Maybe he did not like you after all. Maybe he's just letting you stay, an act of pity because you have nowhere else to go.
Unbeknownst to you, it hurt him just as much to reject you. It pained him to see the hurt on your face as you slowly drifted away into the gardens, away from his sight. But he cannot risk it. What if he tainted you with his rotten flesh? You would think of him as a monster.
Meetings with him in the garden became a daily in your agenda. You once put some blue orchid's on the back of his coat. Later when one of the fatui members pointed it out, he just let the flower be. He never threw the flowers given by you, instead he kept them preserved with his cryo delusion.
Unspoken confessions. He let you in slowly, and your heart also warming up to him.
“May I see your face?,” you asked one night, out in to the garden pavilion with him. Not a wink of sleep in your eyes so he offered to be your company. Your curiosity wasn't surprising to him. He knew this day would come, and he did not intend to hide anything. Truth can be hard to face.
“It's not a pleasant sight. My real appearance is long gone. All that remains are the decaying of flesh underneath.” It did not matter to you. You wanted to see what was underneath that mask. You wanted to see the real him. “I do not care. I want to see.”
The beat of your heart began to get faster as his hands reached for the mask. He had nothing to hide and so he took it off.
Maybe you were going to be disgusted with him or maybe you will keep your distance from him after this, were his thoughts. But as he saw your face, he could not quite read what you were thinking. “Your eyes.. they are like sapphire.”
“You are very unique."
The curse of immortality left him scarred for life. There are times he wished he was dead already, having lost his family and his comrades. His decaying flesh was his constant reminder of the curse put upon him.
But you, you saw the beauty in him. The beauty in his decaying nature. When you reached out to touch his face, he gently caught it and held it within his.
Unspoken confessions. Days went by, your affection towards each other grew more and more. He let you doze off on his shoulders in the garden pavilion while he read to you.
The Captain noticed your tiredness more frequent than usual. You would eat less at dinner and get tired after a few walks. It wasn't long before your body was caught up in a fever.
“Haven't you heard? The sickness has been discovered in Sumeru as well,” one of the fatui agents spoke. “The Akademiya is currently trying to discover what it could be.” “I heard there's no cure for it and that your body slowly weakens until you completely collapse.”
“How is she doing now?,” The Captain asked as he made way to your chamber. “Her state has not shown any improvement sir, the fever subsided a little but the body is getting weaker.” “Do everything that must be done to cure her.”
The doors to your chamber slowly opened. His footsteps quiet as to not wake you. He approached your bed. The slow rise and fall of your chest, mouth slight agape. You looked so peaceful in your sleep. He removed the glove from one of his hands and slowly reached out for your face. He wanted to touch your cheeks. The loose strands of hair were gently pushed aside by his rough calloused hands. He still had his human body form. Mostly the face and some parts were burdened with the curse.
The fever caught up again, your body kept getting weaker. And The Captain was starting to feel restless. The gardens became less lively, your visits less than frequent. Thick snow covered every part of the mansion.
Your current state was quite vulnerable to the ruthless cold of Snezhnaya. Still the garden looked ethereal and your mental state wasn't getting any better staying inside.
The snow made it quite difficult for you to move. Crystals formed around the pavilion which made it look like a little ice palace. The flowers.
You haven't tended to them in a while. But The Captain took care of your lilies. Fresh and white just the newly fallen snow. He was there, standing in front of the lilies. The lilies reminded him of you. Your purity and innocence. The Captain's eyes met yours. You looked just like a lily in that white dress coat.
And that innocent smile. A smile meant towards him.
Thick dark red covered the snow beneath your feet. You couldn't bear the pain in your throat and fell to your knees. Everything became cold, your fragile body fallen on the snow.
Your body was cold, shivering. It felt light as a feather in his arms. Your hands covered with blood, sticky clung to his feather coat as he carried you back. Your head against his chest. You felt safe in his arms. You wanted to stay like this, in his arms, always.
The Captain's heart dropped seeing the sight before him. Your body hitting the ground, the sight of blood. Your body fragile and weak in his arms. The heavy rise and fall of your chest. How much has the sickness spread for you to fall like this?
The doctors were called immediately. He put you from his arms onto the comfort of your bedchambers and stepped outside as doctors and maids rushed in. Blood still fresh on your hands.
If only he knew that was the last time you would be around, he would've held you longer.
Snow fell from the now dull sky of Snezhnaya. The gardens lost their color. The manor was stripped of light.
“She was a beautiful girl. It's a pity her time was so little,” were the Tsaritsa's words of comfort. The Harbingers all paid their respects to you. One by everyone but only The Captain was left standing in front of your grave. 500 years of cataclysm and only a few years with you.
The Captain visited your chambers one last time. Walking past things you once laid your fingers on. Only to come across a book on the table. A book of flowers. He took it in his hands and flipped through the pages where your touch once lingered. He noticed there was a little box beside where the book was
Something about it caught his eye and so he opened it. Inside was a letter.
‘To My Dearest Captain.’
Thank you for looking after me all this time. Your company has been a form of comfort to me. There are so many things I wished to say to you. You set me free and for that I will always be grateful. I wanted to travel the whole of Teyvat. Maybe if I get a little better, we can start by visiting The City of Freedom, Mondstadt.
Yours Truly.
A dried red rose bud was also inside the box along with the letter. It was meant for him. Red roses symbolize true love.
As the years went by, the lilies in the garden grew in number. In the little garden of white lilies, he saw you. Each and every lily was a reminder of you. The Captain visited your grave each year, leaving red roses and white lilies. He preserved the rose bud with his cryo delusion. And when there's a new spring without you, the newly planted red roses around the pavilion where you once listened to him read and shared the love of flowers with, bloom brightly and sway with the light breeze.
A new rose is planted each year by The Captain himself.
Red roses symbolize true love.
divider by @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more
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nxuvillette · 10 months ago
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“I PROMISE, IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.”
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GENSHIN MEN COMFORTING YOU AFTER A FIGHT
synopsis: you and your boyfriend hardly ever fight, so what happens when you finally have one?
❥- including : tartaglia (childe), cyno, kaeya, wriothesley
❥- note : hi guys !! sorry if this post is kind of shit, i kind of rushed it. i hope you guys enjoy regardless <3 reblogs are appreciated !!
content warnings : sfw, fem!reader, ageless + blank blogs dni, angst, arguing, hurt with comfort, use of pet names (baby), fluff, dumb fights, lots and lots of fluff at the end.
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♡ TARTAGLIA (CHILDE)
you and childe hadn’t spoken for much of the day, and this was due to an argument that happened between you two just before you sat down for some breakfast.
it was stupid, genuinely. 
childe had completely misinterpreted something you had said that morning. you were talking about one of your friends and their relationship. for some reason, childe thought you were comparing your relationship to the one your friend had, and it made him question if he was doing enough to make you happy. one thing led to another, and the two of you bickered over the encounter. you tried to explain yourself, but your boyfriend, being the stubborn man he was, didn’t bother to listen and went off on his own accord.
you and childe hardly had any fights. they would usually resolve after an hour or two, but you hadn’t seen him all day. part of you began to grow worried from his sudden absence. did he go out and do something to hurt himself? was he with somebody else? no, there was no way childe would ever cheat on you. he didn’t even look in another woman’s direction when he saw you that day. 
it wasn’t until sunset when childe had finally returned home to you. he had a few scrapes on his arms which seemed like they came from him battling another enemy, but regardless, he seemed to be in one piece. you were very relieved to see that he was fine. it made you run into his arms the moment he came into the door, which took your boyfriend by surprise. he was under the impression that you were still pissed off at him for the shit that he had pulled early on in the day. he knew he was wrong and he should have apologized, but he didn’t know how to put it into words. sometimes he wished he wasn’t so air headed. 
his arm went around your waist, bringing your body closer to his. the smell of his skin made you calm down. “i thought something bad happened to you..” your eyes didn’t move from the floor. 
childe could sense the worry that was in your voice. he shouldn’t have done that to you. he would never want to make you feel scared or put you under the idea that he would leave you. he wasn’t going to ever leave like that again, ever. “i’m sorry, baby..” he whispered, running his fingers along your backside. “i’m such an idiot.. i shouldn’t have said that shit. i love you way too much to hurt you..” 
you lifted your head to meet his ocean blue eyes. he had this frown on his features. you could see how guilty he felt for putting you in such a position. no matter what, you would always be in love with childe. no small argument would make your feelings for him shift, ever. you knew he could be stubborn at times, and honestly, so could you. all that mattered to you in the end was that you two made up and forget the whole thing. “it’s okay.. i still love you, okay?” you smiled at him, which made his heart skip a beat.
childe couldn’t help but smile, too. he leaned towards you and planted a kiss on your lips. he didn’t ever want to see you frown again. he would do anything to see a smile on your pretty face. “let me make up for it.. how about we take a bath together, hm?” he questioned, raising his eyebrows. 
you nodded your head. “sure..” you grinned.
♡ CYNO
you didn’t expect cyno to get upset earlier. 
cyno was in a bit of a rush that afternoon. he had a lot of things to tend to as the mahamatra, so he typically had a busy schedule. at the time, you had no idea that he had to be somewhere at a certain hour, so when you saw your lover wandering around aaru village by himself, you decided to go and talk with him to ask how his day was.
he kept his responses to you a bit shorter than usual, but that’s how he usually was. cyno was more the type of man to listen more than he did talk, but the more you kept speaking, the more he grew somewhat irritated. he had to meet with candace and discuss something that had occurred on his way there. he had to return as quickly as possible, though, because there were several people who needed his help out there. 
cyno had accidentally snapped at you, which in turn made you fire back at him.
it was very out of the ordinary for him to ever get angry with you. cyno was very patient, and he was especially with you. he was never the kind of man to be rude to you or yell at you, ever, so this threw you off completely. before he could even apologize, you left and went back to the place you two shared together. 
he didn’t return home until later that night. he had been thinking about what he had done all day, and it made him feel guilty for being that way towards you. you were his girlfriend. he loved you more than anybody else, and he managed to hurt your feelings because he was unable to control his very own. cyno hoped you wouldn’t want to leave him. anxiety plagued him the entire day. he wondered if he would return back to you and find that you deserted the home you two stayed in. 
much to his relief, you were lying in bed. you were turned on your side that was facing the window which exposed the vast desert outside. he sat down beside you and watched as your eyes fluttered open at the sudden weight taking over the bed. 
“i’m sorry..” cyno whispered, looking down at you with amber eyes. 
you sat up, crossing your legs on the mattress. you didn’t think he would come back being so apologetic, but you couldn’t help but forgive him. it did hurt your feelings a lot, but he was dealing with so much. it didn’t excuse what he did, but you two never fight. he wasn’t argumentative everyday. “it’s okay.. i just felt like shit for bothering you. i should have considered your schedule..” you didn’t want to look at him, but he tilted your chin to look into your eyes. 
cyno leaned in and hugged you, which took you by surprise. “no need.. i was an asshole for not controlling myself. you didn’t deserve any of that..” he squeezed your body. “i love you.. i hope you can forgive me.”
your hand rested on his shoulder blade. his skin felt warm from the blazing heat of the sun that he was under constantly. “i love you too..” you spoke. “i can forgive you, no worries.”
♡ KAEYA
you and kaeya had been dating for quite a while. since you were his girlfriend, there were some things that you needed to get accustomed to in the relationship.
especially kaeya’s drinking habit.
you didn’t mind that he would go off to the bars some nights to have a few drinks with his friends. hell, you did it a few times yourself with your own friends, but it became an issue when he would come late to your dates due to him being hungover the next day. you knew he couldn’t help but sleep an extra hour or two through the morning, but it had happened a few times and it led up to an argument occurring between you. you claimed it was a bother to you and he wasn’t being considerate of your time and energy.
what made it worse was kaeya usually was the one to make these plans, so for him to just not show up, it felt unfair to you. if he knew he was going to drink a lot, why would he continue to make plans with you the next day? it didn’t make any sense to you whatsoever, and you were tired of him either not showing up or having to go to his house to wake him up.
when you stormed out of his house and the door slammed behind you, kaeya felt immediate regret plaguing his chest. he did everything for you in the relationship and you did the same for him. he felt like he was an idiot for letting his drinking habits get a hold of your relationship. he didn’t have a drinking problem by any means, but he knew when he had too much he wouldn’t want to do anything the next day. you were right. it was unfair of him to miss out on spending quality time with you. he didn’t want to make you feel unimportant or a second priority. kaeya loved you more than life itself. how could he hurt the one person he poured his heart and soul into?
he gave you a bit of time to blow off steam. he knew chasing after you could escalate things further, so he decided to leave you alone for the rest of the day. however, he wasn’t about to let you both go to bed angry with each other.
so, when he showed up at your doorstep with a bouquet of flowers, you were quite surprised. you didn’t think kaeya would even bother making an effort to talk things through with you, but he was standing there with an apologetic expression. “can we talk? i understand if not.. but i just don’t want you going to bed pissed at me.” he clutched the flower stems in his hand, hoping you would hear him out.
you nodded your head, inviting him into your home and watching him step inside. kaeya then turned to face you, handing the flowers in your direction. they were your favorite, lamp grass. you loved the way they glowed in the dark. “kaeya.. i’m-“ you started, taking the flowers from him.
“i’m sorry.. i didn’t mean to keep missing out on our dates. i was a shitty boyfriend for keeping up with my behavior, and i shouldn’t have been doing that in the first place.” he cut you off, shocking you. “i love you, (y/n), and i don’t want you to think otherwise.”
you stood there for a few moments in silence. you weren’t sure what to say to him, but you could sense his genuine energy in his voice. “i forgive you..” you said, lifting your eyes to meet his. “i don’t want it to happen again, okay? i love to spend time with you and i don’t wanna feel like you dislike my presence.”
he took your free hand into his, placing a soft kiss on the top of it. he had been a gentleman since day one and it seemed like that attribute of him never left his personality. “i love seeing you more than anybody else, please don’t think you’re a burden. i’d do anything to spend any waking moment with you by my side, okay? i won’t ever do it again.” kaeya replied, stepping closer to where you were standing.
you smiled, pressing a kiss on the side of his cheek. he loved how soft your lips felt against his skin. “i appreciate that..” you sounded much happier, which relieved him.
kaeya wasn’t going to do that ever again. he could never lose you, ever.
♡ WRIOTHESLEY
wriothesley was quite a busy man. it was something you knew you were signing up for when you started to date him a few months back. his job was tiring, exhausting even. he had a huge responsibility on his shoulders to carry, and sometimes it stressed him out more than he would like to admit.
it seemed like that stress began to reach its breaking point, because wriothesley hadn’t been acting right over the last few days. you assumed he was just dealing with his job, so you decided to try and see if venting would have any relief to your boyfriend. you two had done it many times before when things got a little hectic in your personal lives. plus, you both trusted each other greatly. you didn’t think he would have an issue with it.
well, you were wrong, unfortunately.
when you made the attempt to speak to your boyfriend about what was wrong, he had a serious attitude, and things escalated to you two both having a fight. you didn’t like the way he was speaking to you and he was becoming upset with you for no reason at all. all you had asked him was if he wanted to talk, but it seemed like that question alone must have ruffled his feathers. 
you two never fought, so this had completely blindsided you.
wriothesley then left for work, leaving you by yourself in the apartment you lived in. it wasn’t your intention to make him angry with you. all you wanted to know was what was troubling him to make him feel so overwhelmed. that fact crept up on wriothesley immediately after he entered his office at the fortress. he shouldn’t have snapped at you that way. it wasn’t right, nor was it excusable. he was the one person who was supposed to make you happy, not hurt.
a few hours later, he returned home a lot earlier than usual. things were slow at the fortress, so he decided to leave early and try to patch things up with you. he found you sitting on the couch with a book in your hands, seemingly trying to read away what had happened earlier between you. you were a bit taken back to see him standing in front of you, but you didn’t know what to say to him. 
“i’m sorry.. i was out of line earlier.” he broke the silence between you. it was like popping a balloon. “i get it if you’re pissed at me.. i can give you space if you’d like.”
you sat there for a few moments. you closed the book in your hands and placed it on the wooden table in front of you. wriothesley was right. he shouldn’t have been that much of an ass to you. you didn’t deserve such treatment, but you loved him. he was never like that towards you and your friends had told you before that random fights are normal. “it’s okay.. i forgive you.” you replied, standing up to go in front of him. “please.. just promise me you won’t do that again.” 
his hands went to cup your cheeks. his thumbs brushed against your smooth skin. you could see how guilty he felt for doing what he had done. “i promise.. i swear, (y/n), i’ll never do that again. i could never hurt you like that, ever again.” he looked down at you with sincerity on his features. 
you leaned in to hug him. wriothesley inhaled the fresh scent of your shampoo and felt immediately calmed from your touch. he loved you, dearly. he could never do that to you again and he vowed to never pull a stunt like that with you ever again.
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© NXUVILLETTE ┆ all rights reserved, do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.
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lix1nyu · 3 months ago
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not giving him kisses w/ xiao, wanderer, and tartaglia
in which you decide to tease him. gn!reader
established relationship, fluff, kissing
a/n: i saw an instagram reel and had to do this with them! hope nobody's done this already. not proofread sorry 🙏🙏
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xiao's head rests between your collarbone and your chin, his chest rising and falling in time with yours. a view always soothes him, whether it's you, or the sun setting below qingyun peak.
it is moments like these that he especially cherishes, when you two sit in comfortable silence. when he's feeling brave, he'll peck your lips quickly, and then go right back to using you as a pillow.
xiao feels brave today. he removes his head from its comfortable spot and his fingertips graze your cheek, aiming to place his lips on yours, but you lay a hand over his heart gently.
"...what?"
confusion is cute on him, but you kind of feel bad about what you're about to do.
"um, yn?"
you just smile innocently.
xiao's expression droops visibly. his hand falls from your face, and he starts to turn away, ears red.
"nooo," you instantly say, giving a small guilty laugh. setting a hand on his jaw, you tilt his head back to you and kiss him, gently and apologetically.
xiao has a tiny frown on his face, eyes avoiding yours. "why'd you do that..?" he asks softly.
"i'm sorry," you say, and you kiss him again. "it was just a prank."
he scowls then. "tch, i thought you didn't want me to kiss you anymore or something."
you grab his shirt collar and pull him to you, to prove him wrong.
"'m sorry," you mumble again. "i love youu." he puts his head back on your shoulder, tracing the lines of your palm.
xiao hums in response to your apology. two minutes later, he connects your mouths again, tasting sweet with a trace of almond tofu.
two minutes later he does it again.
and again.
you won't be going back to liyue harbor any time soon.
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you pull something new on him almost every week.
this time, you walk up to wanderer sitting on the couch and boldly put your hand on his neck, leaning in until you're breathing the same air. one leg is on the couch next to to him and the other rests on the floor.
his eyes dart between yours and your lips, evidently confused but not complaining. hands find their way to your middle.
you lean in like you're about to kiss him, but just when he's about to meet you halfway...
wanderer stares at you when you just get up off of him, but he pulls you by your waist back down. you tumble onto his lap, with his scrutinizing gaze above.
"what do you think you're doing?" he asks in his signature no-bullshit voice.
"sorry," you say cheerfully. "prank." you decide to snuggle into his shoulder instead.
"tsk..." he flicks your forehead. "you and your silly pranks. you beg for my kisses all the time, but you try to pull this on me?"
you roll your eyes. "so can i have a kiss?"
"nope," wanderer says haughtily, "you had your chance!"
so you give him your best pout, playing with his hand in yours until he gives in.
mr king of snark grumbles, "fine, i guess you can have a kiss..."
his lips are warm, unlike the cool hands on your waist. just when you start prodding for entry with your tongue, wanderer pulls away.
"nope, that was all you get."
"whaaat! baby, i said sorryyy..."
"nope."
of course, he relents later. the man would do anything for you, after all.
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"okay, baby, you've gotta go to work!"
he doesn't budge.
"baby. you're gonna be late."
tartaglia rests his face on his palm, elbow propped up on the kitchen island. "aren't you forgetting something?" he asks with a stupidly gorgeous cheeky smile.
"um..." you know exactly what you're forgetting, but you say, "oh right, your coffee! here, love."
he blinks.
then rises from his chair to lean in and kiss you, but a hand on his chest stops him.
a tiny laugh leaves his chest.
"whaaat, yn?" when you don't reply, he leans in again, but you push him away.
your boyfriend drops his head on your shoulder, giving you a cute pout. "give me a kiss," he whispers.
you only smile, not moving.
"does my breath smell or something?"
"no," you giggle.
then a hand cups the back of your neck and pulls you to him, his lips meeting yours. he kisses you fiercely, over and over. laughing into his mouth, you tap his chest gently to signal that you can't breathe. tartaglia attacks your neck instead, burying his forehead into your skin when he's done.
"finished?" you giggle.
a kiss on your jaw.
"you have work, love."
another on the corner of your smile.
"ajax tarta-"
"okay, i'm going!!"
hope ygs enjoyed this!!! maybe will do different characters?
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chilumi-shipper · 8 months ago
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Not Meant for the World
Kamisato Ayato x Fem!Servant!Reader
Summary: You fell for him, he fell for you, it was the typical start of a relationship, only problem is… well, he's him and you're you. A Commissioner who holds power over the nation, and a servant that basically amounts to nothing in the whole scheme of things. It was a mutual decision to keep your relationship a secret, only to be kept within the dead of night in his bedroom, evaporating before the sun could even rise for another day. But then… Ayato seems so keen keeping it a secret forever, letting the stream of wedding proposals and love letters flood in, going through great lengths to make sure the information doesn't leak out, almost like he's ashamed of being with someone like you. You could only take so much of that.
Tags: Angst no Comfort, Hidden Relationship
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
"You should probably go back to your quarters." As you were snuggled up to your lover's chest, enjoying his warmth under the covers of his bed, he spoke.
"But it's barely time." You whined, pressing your body closer to his and rubbing your face on his chest.
Back then, he would cave, he would chuckle and wrap his arms tighter around you, saying that you could stay for a little bit more and that he didn't really want you to leave anyway.
Now… he pulls away from your embrace, sighing as he looks you in the eye.
"It would be best to elliminate all the chances of us being caught, and I believe that some of the servants have been getting up early to start their shifts." He reasoned, his hold faltering as you feel his arms slip off you.
You felt a clenching pain in your chest as you slowly get up, looking around his room, you didn't want to leave, and yet when you looked at him, you felt like you were being pushed away.
"Okay… I guess I'll get going now…"
This is the part where he would usually kiss you and remind you that he loves you…
It never came…
You left his room without another word.
"Is it perhaps too much to visit a festival together?" You asked, not expecting a pleasurable answer from the Yashiro Commissioner sat on his office chair and drinking a cup of tea you prepared for him.
"I believe it is, being seen in public in a non-professional setting would be rather suspicious if it's just the two of us." Ayato responds firmly, oblivious to (or perhaps just ignoring) the frown that formed on your face.
"We've been out together multiple times…" You reasoned, though you sounded unsure, not wanting to sour his mood and lessen your chances of getting him to agree to your proposal. "We haven't been on a date in a while."
"The families offering up their daughters to me are very vigilant of my public movements, suspicions will arise if they were to see me with any lady for no particular reason." He did not even spare you a glance, answering swiftly as he always does.
Yet again, you fail to persuade him to be with you. You prepared to say more, but a knock came before your words.
A guest came to the estate, a father of one of the many noble ladies offering their hand in marriage.
Long story short, he's here to talk marriage business, as these fathers always do.
When the guest left for a moment, "My lord, I just need a few more minutes to talk to you." Many times, you have tried to intervene, not satisfied with how your conversation earlier abruptly ended.
"Y/N, there are matters more important than this. Wait a moment." He pays you no mind, but you have had enough. "You are being too obv-"
"Ayato, stop." You spoke firmly, freezing him in his place. "I'm still talking to you." You approached him, his back still turned to you.
Slowly, he turned around to face you, his eyes held an unfit expression for him, almost like nervousness. "Y/N, let's not do this now…"
"Do you still want to be with me?" You asked impulsively, stripping the formalities and simply talking to the man you knew as your lover. Your eyes fill with tears, looking at him being lost for words. You hoped his answer would be immediate, that he would exclaim that why would you even ask such a question.
As you stood there, "Lord Kamisato, come along, don't let the servant keep all of our time." The guest came back, standing beside Ayato, who had yet to say anything.
No words were spoken, but the Commissioner knew that right there, right in front of the unknowing guest, in your watery gaze, he had a choice to make.
"Why don't you get us some tea in the meantime?" The guest spoke up again referring to you, but you have no intention of moving until your lover finally speaks up.
With a gulp, Ayato stood his ground. "Yes, please prepare us some tea, Y/N. No more of your nonsense."
A single tear, that's what you allowed for him to see as you nodded silently. But as you prepared the tea, your vision was blurry from the neverending tears, your sobs couldn't be controlled as you struggle to catch your breath.
But you needed that, you needed that to remind yourself that you are merely a servant.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
The Yashiro Commissioner sat on his bed that night, looking at the door to his room. His heart was beating fast, hoping for it to open and show the figure of his lover, though the odds are against his desires.
He hoped that maybe you'd spare him a chance, that you'd walk into the room and tell him that you'll allow him to show you how you much he truly loves you.
The door remains close. And so does his heart begin to ache. Ayato didn't sleep that night, he merely lied down and looked up at the ceiling, trying to imagine your warmth embracing him, trying to make it seem like your side of the bed wasn't left cold.
"My Lord…" His eyes looked up from the document he's been staring it for the past hour when he heard your voice… calling him in such a cold manner. You said nothing more, placing a tray of tea and pastries on an empty spot on his desk.
"Ahh, thank you…" Ayato looked at your face, hoping to see your usual smile whenever you served him his afternoon tea, yet your face held nothing but a blank expression. You merely bowed at him, before leaving without another word.
Your name was at the tip of his tongue, and his entire being screamed at him to just say it. He wanted desperately to call for your attention, but, though he did not want to admit it… he was scared…
You stopped in your tracks, remembering something that you had to discuss with him. Ayato, ever so perceptive of your actions, perked up.
"You have a meeting with the head of the Tenryou Commission later at noon, something about an agreement with regards to your relation with his daughter." You did not bother to face him to give him the reminder, opting to walk away once you finished your sentence.
The Yashiro Commissioner's face fell as he watched you leave the room, his heart still heavy, and his mind cursing at him for not having the guts to talk to you properly.
The pain felt more real once he entered his room for the night.
The place has been wiped clean of your existence, the covers have been changed so not even your scent lingered, some of the clothes you kept in his closet are gone, the vase of flowers you like to decorate his nightstand with is gone…
The framed picture of the two of you that sat on his nightstand is gone…
It felt suffocating…
With a sigh, Ayato closed the door, not wanting to see such a sad space, he instead went back to his office.
As he sat on his chair, he opened one of the drawers of his desk…
A smiled couldn't help but form on his face, a bittersweet one, when he saw the picture of you that he kept there a long time ago.
He laid his head on his arms on the desk, your picture next to his face. He figures that it was the only way he can sleep without feeling the suffocating emptiness of his room weighing upon him.
Today is the day the festival you were so excited about starts, and it's already been arranged for quite a while that today is your day-off. "…Y/N was really hoping that I'd join her at the festival." Half of
Thoma's words were muffled, but he could make out your name and the festival.
The blond retainer was asking for a day-off as well, to go with you.
Something uncomfortable boiled in Ayato's core, you asked him to join you back then, and he said that he couldn't. Yet, all he wishes now was to accompany you, to be by your side and not have to think about keeping your relationship a secret.
"With Y/N…?" Ayato asked, his voice laced with disappointment that did not escape his retainer's ears.
"Is something the matter, my Lord?"
Truly did his entire being want to disapprove of Thoma's request, he wants to go to you and offer to go with you himself.
"No, I'm quite alright, Thoma…" The Yashiro Commissioner heaved a sigh. "I'll allow your request."
You spent your day at the festival with Thoma, and it was obvious that you enjoyed it given the large smile that was plastered when you got back to the estate.
Meanwhile, Ayato spent his day at his desk, looking at meaningless paperwork while dreaming of being hand-in-hand with you at the festival, imagining that you would eat your heart out with all the streetfood available, watch the firework show when nighttime falls, and dance slowly at the festival music at midnight when everyone else already left.
That night though, he approaches you, his heart pounding when he caught your attention. "May I… ask you to sleep next to me again?"
He was tired, he could only take a week of sleeping in his office because his room haunted him too much. Unfortunately for him, he doesn't know how to even start explaining himself, doesn't know how to win you back, to say that he does choose you over any form of nobility that he has.
You smiled at him�� emptily.
"I'm your servant, my lord. If you wish for me to, I will."
So you did, you slept next to him, he hugged you tightly, snuggling you up to his chest, yet you refused to hug back, to nuzzle in his embrace like you used to. You merely did as you were requested.
Ayato tried to ignore the tightening of his heart just before sleep and exhausted took over him.
But he couldn't ignore the chill he felt when he woke up hugging nothing. It's just as it should be, the servant listened to her lord, and now she left to do her other tasks.
It was crazy to hope a relationship like yours could work out. Kamisato Ayato felt a few tears fall from his eyes, now, he wished for you to stay.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
Yo, it's 3am and I'm gonna sleep now.
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dark-night-hero · 2 years ago
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Imagine it suddenly came into mind that Morax is the type of being, lover, that would not hesitate to sacrifice you for the sake of the world.
"You know I love you, right?" He spoke softly as if he wasn't looking down at you with an emotionless expression on your face.
"But not enough to choose me over the world?" You chuckle, "I mean, I do know I'm not special, but.." As your voice cracked, you unconsciously reach out and clench the fatal would on the side of your stomach caused by your lover's pole arm. "To have that slapped right in the face.." You smile as small and big cracks spread all over you as blood dripped down your mouth. "Unexpectedly hurts."
Imagine as he stood there across you, as you slowly start to form cracks all over your body. As you slowly start to disintegrate right across him with a bright yet sad smile on your face. You saw the way his amber iris were shaken. How tightly he was holding his pole arm and how blood dripped down all the way from his lips down to his chin as he bit down his lips. All to prevent himself from going after you.
Imagine, during your final moments, you took a step forward towards him. Feeling light as you tried to smile still, but as you do, take a step forward. Everything went back. At the same time, Morax unconsciously took a step forward upon seeing you went towards him, but as soon as you do. You're gone along the wind.
"If I do not kill you, I betray my nation. My nation is very dear to me."
"Dearer than I?"
"Yes love, dearer than you."
Imagine the way he dropped his weapon, hand unconsciously reaching out in the air, trying to grab at least a particle of yours, but it just slipped past his finger like a fine sand.
"Ah." He let out a sound as he took up. The sky looked dark and heavy, as if ready to cry any moment.
"I'm tired." Just like that, one drop of rain fell from the sky into the ground followed by another, and then another.
[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2023°
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saetoru · 1 year ago
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✩ ‧₊˚ ✩ JUST YOURS — LYNEY.
contents. archon quest spoilers, reader finds out lyney is from the house of the hearth—and all the drama + betrayal that comes from that </3 so big rip </3 but it has a hopeful ending tho !!
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lyney has knocked on your door three times today—you haven’t opened up once. you can’t.
“please,” you can hear his muffled voice, “i just want to talk. will you let me explain?”
magicians must always make their audience believe in the impossible, he’s always told you with that sweet, alluring little smile on his face that makes you hang onto every word of his. he’s right, you think—magicians are simply those who have mastered the art of deception, and lyney is no exception. he’s deceiving you even now, with that broken voice as if he’s the one who’s hurt.
word spreads fast in fontaine—lyney, your sweet, romantic, devoted lyney, is of the house of the hearth. his trial mortifies you at first—but deep down, you know in your heart that lyney is no murderer. and then, in an instant, you’re not so sure anymore when somehow, within less than a day, lady furina is able to uncover more about your boyfriend than you have in months.
lyney is of the house of the hearth. he’s of the fatui.
“i’m sorry,” you hear a thud of his forehead resting against the door, “you’re mad, i know—but let me explain the—”
for the first time all day, you open the door. you’re not sure why—somehow, you need him to know you’re not just mad. you’ve been mad at lyney before, being mad is easy. being mad means he’ll pull a rose from behind your ear and make you smile against your will. being mad means you’ll realize you can’t stay mad at him for long, not when he looks at you like that. being mad is temporary—but this? this feels permanent.
you’re not mad at lyney. you simply can’t trust him anymore, and he needs to know that, needs to understand that he should stay away and never find you again.
you’re glaring at him, staring at the face that has always done nothing but make you smile. you wonder, for a small, doubtful moment, if every smile lyney has ever pulled from you has been built off of pure lies and half truths and withheld information.
you’ve given him every bit of yourself, told him everything there is to tell and then some, let him discover things himself that no one has yet to learn. and lyney, as you learn, is someone you can’t even begin to know, not really—maybe not ever.
“you’re with the fatui,” your voice is cold, but you know he can hear the waver—you hate him for that. for being able to pick you apart when you don’t know the first thing about him, “you’ve lied to me all this time—”
“i didn’t lie,” he says quickly, “i just…didn’t tell you everything—”
“that’s not any better,” you cut him off, finality in your voice that makes his eyes widen a fraction, “i have no business with someone of the—”
“wait,” his foot stops the door before it can close, stepping in despite your protests as he inches closer and closer. you take a step back every time—the hurt on his face is palpable. “can…can i explain? please?”
“explain what?” you furrow your eyebrows, “explain that you’re with the fatui? how is there any explaining that? how can you look me in the eye and tell me you’re not bad—”
“i’m not,” he insists, “i’m not bad.”
lyney has never looked at you like that—like you’ve hurt him right where he’s most vulnerable, right where he’s weak and fragile and can’t bear to be hurt. you hate that you want to apologize for a moment, that you want to cradle his face and kiss the tremble off of his lips.
“then what are you?” you challenge, crossing your arms.
“i’m trying to save people,” he croaks, “our organization has a lot of people—a lot of goals. father and i want to—”
“your father has hurt people,” you cut him off.
“father saved me,” he says firmly, “and lynette. she gave us a home. and she wants to save the people of this nation—”
“she’s taken advantage of your weakness and—”
“she did what no one else would for me and my family.”
“then go,” you spit, “go to her and do her bidding. but i can’t turn a blind eye to the fact that you’re with the fatui.”
“even as a member of the house, my decisions are my own,” his hand grabs yours—you can’t find it in yourself to pull it away. it’s familiar, warm—it’s lyney. your lyney. “i’m doing what i believe is right. to break the prophecy.”
“i don’t know what you’re trying to do,” you admit, tired, defeated, “or who you are, frankly. but i’m tired of lies, lyney.”
“then i’ll tell you the truth,” his voice trembles, “anything you ask.”
“i’m not sure that’ll help,” you say quietly.
and then his arms are wrapped tightly around you, his head tucking into the crook of your neck as he pulls you close. you want to push him away. you want to melt into his arms. you want to tell him to leave. you want to ask him to always stay.
lyney is of the house of the hearth, the fatui. but he’s also your lyney—the one who brings you flowers and tucks them behind your ear, the one who does tricks for children and makes them smile, the one who gives his heart and soul for his family to keep them safe.
you don’t know if the two can coexist as one, but you know despite it all, you still love lyney, and you don’t know if you can stop. the thought is haunting.
“i’ve always done what i believe is right,” he promises, “i’ve never hurt someone innocent. you have to know that much.”
“lyney—”
“i love you,” his voice breaks, “i’ve always loved you as just lyney. i promise.”
“i’m scared of who you are when you’re not just lyney,” you whisper—and you suppose you’re also weak, because your hand slips into his hair, stroking through the strands so that if it’s the last time, maybe you can commit the feeling of him to memory.
you can feel his tears fall onto your skin, and you can feel his fingers grip your shirt as he clings onto you, onto the last bit of hope that you’re his—that he’s yours. your lyney, the one you’ve always known and loved.
“i’m always just lyney,” he promises, “no matter who i’m with.”
“i just…need time,” you sniffle, “to think.”
“okay,” he says quietly. you can feel his lip quiver against your skin as he presses a kiss to your neck, “i’ll wait. however long you need, i’ll wait. i love you.”
“i know, lyney,” you sigh, caving and pressing a gentle kiss to the side of his head. you savor the feeling—just in case you’ll never feel it again.
maybe you can—maybe he’s telling the truth. maybe lyney has always been yours, the one you think you know. you don’t know, but you hope you’ll find out.
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i would forgive him i can’t lie to you no amount of fatui crimes could outweigh how badly i need to kiss this little shrimp of mine
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milkbobatyun · 2 months ago
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i'll do better, i swear
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pairing: ayato x fem!reader
genre: angstober, events, angst with slight happy ending
summary: an arranged marriage between the kamisato family and your family, but the busy nature of being the head of the kamisato family keeps ayato away from you
word count: 1.8k
a/n: dont ask about where in the canon timeline this falls, idek myself. anyways, im just feeding those who enjoy arranged marriage troupes (myself) by writing this
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the kimono restricted your breathing, obi tight around your waist. you stood beside your father, eyes trained on the floor beneath you, an ornament beside him.
pleasantries were exchanged between the head of the kamisato family and your father, while you stood silently. since birth, you had been trained to be the perfect wife, proficient in cooking, cleaning, brewing tea and needlework. it was beaten into you to remain quiet until spoken to, agree to everything your father or husband said, without question.
you knelt onto the cushion, hands placed in your lap, fingers trembling. the head of the kamisato family offered you a porcelain cup of tea, which you accepted with grace and a quiet word of gratitude.
the exchange continued around you, discussions of your marriage with ayato, son and heir of the kamisato family, as though you were a mere ghost. you quietly sipped at the tea, wincing inwardly at the bitter taste, mirroring the feeling inside your heart. the conversation ended when all the tea disappeared from the pot, the deep and unyielding voices of the men fading into exchanges of goodbye.
as you left the estate, you let a breath you didn’t know you had been holding. you had fulfilled your duty today, but the next time you came to the estate, it would be for your wedding.
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the ceremony was grand, hiding the lack of love in your union of families. the wedding passed in a blur of noise and colour. bright silks, glittering jewels, and ceremonial incense that filled the air like a fog, concealing the truth. you felt like a marionette on a string, pulled from place to place by bustling servants, their hurried gestures dictating your every move. this was only a union of houses, not hearts and no amount of jewellery or grandeur could hide that.
your only companions the sweet younger sister of ayato and his faithful servant, thoma. you were grateful for their presence, keeping you grounded in the chaos. even after the wedding, they stuck true to you.
as the lady of the house, you attended to your duties diligently, from directing the household staff to overseeing the preparations of ceremonies. more often than not, you found yourself sitting in the sunlight of the patio, a pair of scissors in hand, trimming and replacing the wilting flowers, decorating the cold vases. petals fell like delicate fragments of your own sorrow. while you replaced them, you wondered if you were just like these flowers—-ornaments to be seen.
the busy nature of your husband’s work limited his time spent with you. you didn’t blame him, you understood the weight of his position, however his absence was a knife in your heart, a wound that never seemed to heal. the vases were like the halls of the house, beautifully decorated, but cold.
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ayaka and thoma could only watch you with pity, the forgotten and unwanted lady of the kamisato house. they noticed how your hands would slow, becoming lost in thought, scissors dangling from your hands as you stared up at the sky, watching the birds in envy. 
they longed to speak to you about it, but the silence was too heavy, too suffocating to break.
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the chirpiness of cicadas faded, the end of summer near. leaves turned from vibrant green to a multitude of warm colours, sunset painted across the leaves of the trees. winter came in a flurry of snow and cold air, while spring’s short warmth was quickly replaced by the heat of summer.
without you realising, a year had passed and your wedding anniversary was nearing.
in that year, you were lucky if you could catch a glimpse of him leaving, as he slipped on his shoes to leave the house.
despite that, you had endeavoured to make your first year anniversary special. accompanied by thoma, the two of you wandered the streets of inazuma, picking out the best produce while thoma filled the air with pleasant conversation. you found yourself smiling and laughing along, heart light with cheer.
once you arrived at home, ayaka helped you prepare the feast, the pair of you bustling around the kitchen in practiced movement, like two elegant dancers, prancing around the kitchen to the rhythm of clinking utensils and bubbling pots. perhaps this dinner would bring the two of you closer.
the candles burned brightly like your hope, the only source of light in the dim room. the sun had set hours ago, the moonlight brightening the night sky. you sat patiently, ignoring the tingling of your legs, folded neatly underneath you.
as the night deepened, your eyelids began drooping, head bobbling as you fought to stay awake. the candles flickered, the wax dripping down the length of the candle.
a creak of the wooden plank startled you awake, your heart ablaze with hope. but it was only ayaka, her heart breaking at the look of hope on your face. she shook her head, watching you with pity as she watched your face crumple in disappointment. tears threatened to spill, but you held them back, sniffles filling the room.
the candles flickered weakly, their flames dimming, like your hope.
you plastered on your mask, a smile pasted onto your face. ayaka couldn’t bear to see you like this. to her, you were like the kind, gentle, elder sister she had always wanted. you quickly became someone ayaka looked up to. you listened to her talk and ramble about her problems and thoughts, she wanted to do the same. she wanted to be someone who you could open up to, someone who didn’t judge. now, she sat helpless, watching the cracks in your mask form and widen.
with quick strides, she crossed the room, engulfing you in a tight hug. surprise flitted across your face, before you embraced her tightly, tears leaking from your eyes. ayaka’s actions comforted you, her simple action breaking a hole in the high walls you put up.
like a dam breaking, you sobbed, words flowing out of your mouth, words that you had been taught from a young age should be kept hidden inside. women should only talk about the good things, the positives. talk of the negative feelings, the burdens you have, and you’ll become ugly, your tutor had scared you.
you took the opportunity of the sake placed on the table, pouring yourself endless cups, drinking away the sorrow. before long, the world took on a fuzzy haze, your face warm and your tongue slurring.
in your drunk stupor, you engaged in rare ‘girl talk’ with ayaka.
“you know,” you slurred, voice blending, head drooping. “as a child, i dreamed of receiving flowers from someone.” your voice trailed off, descending into silence.
just as ayaka was becoming worried about the lack of noise from you, the stillness was broken by soft snores. you had fallen asleep, dreaming of a life where you had affection and love. quietly chuckling, ayaka thought about how cute this scene was. your body slumping slightly, expression peaceful in the haze of exhaustion and alcohol.
despite the heaviness of the night, your relaxed and vulnerable figure warmed her heart. you looked so small and fragile in the large empty room, illuminated by the moonlight.
the shoji door slid open with a gentle swish, ayato’s tall figure framing the doorway. his hair was loosening from its neat ponytail, ink staining his fingers.
“sister.” he breathed quietly in greeting. “thoma reminded me what date today was.”
his sister’s sharp and disapproving glare made him flinch, guilt evident on his features. with measured steps, ayato entered the room, his gaze falling on your slumped form, a flicker of something flashed across his face.
ayaka’s eyes flitted between you and ayato, a complex mix of emotions swelling in her chest. relief, combined with frustration and disappointment.
“brother,” ayaka’s soft voice broke the silence, a quiet plea tinging her voice. “please, lady [name] deserves better than how you’re treating her.” a sigh falls from ayaka’s lips. “at least try to spare some time, or send a letter home when you don’t have the time, so she doesn’t have to wait like this.”
ayato stilled, the weight of ayaka’s quiet reprimand heavy on his shoulders, impossible to ignore and piercing through the composed facade he had grown so used to wearing.
“i…” ayato’s voice faltered, struggling to find the right words. in matters of state, he had always had a quick mind, ready to negotiate treaties and settle disputes, yet now, the words slipped through his fingers like sand.
“it was not my intention to neglect her,” ayato admitted, eyes downcast. “but i realise now…”
ayaka’s eyes softened as she looked at her brother. “make amends, ayato. she’s been waiting for you, tonight especially—” she gestures to the untouched food, laying on the table, the melting candles, “—she had hoped…”
ayaka is cut off when her brother’s arm shoots out, catching your head before it can hit the table. gently, he leans your head on his shoulder, the faint scent of sake clinging to you. in your sleep, you stirred, but remain lost in the dreams of a life filled with tenderness and love.
“i will try,” ayato promised, his face set with determination. “you will watch me, and you will be proud.”
for a long while, the only sound in the room was the soft rustle of the evening breeze. ayaka watched her brother in silence, hoping that this time, he would stay true to his promise.
ayato cradled your form, the soft rise and fall of your breathing a sharp contrast to his inner turmoil. his heart clenched as he imagined the hope you must have carried, waiting for him, as the hours slipped by.
ayaka studied her brother’s face, noticing the burden of regret etched into his features. ayato had always been a man of responsibility, maybe this time his duties would extend to you, his wife.
with tender care, ayato picked you up, carrying you to your room. he was startled when he felt his clothing grow wet, quiet sniffles filling the air. you were crying in your sleep.
gently, ayato set you down on your bed, as though afraid you might shatter if he placed you down too hard. he covered your figure with the luscious silk blankets, brushing away your tears with his hand. despite all the duties that were waiting for him, ayato stayed for a few more hours, 
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a few days later, as you sit on the patio, watching the koi fish, thoma approaches you, hands hidden behind his back.
“m’lady,” thoma breaks into your thoughts, voice hesitant. “these are for you, from my lord.”
in his hands is a stunning bouquet of native inazuman flowers, mixed with your favourite flowers, carefully selected and curated with love.
perhaps, just perhaps, things were beginning to change.
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taglist (open): @yeonjunsfox
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∧,,,∧ ( ̳• · • ̳)  © curated with love by milkbobayun 2024 / づ ♡
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primofate · 1 year ago
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Genshin Angst Headcanons - Why the two of you broke up
Note: Had an unexpected free day! I haven't written in a while, please excuse the mistakes, if any.
Disclaimer at the end of the post
Warning: Some are pretty predictable. Each of them have their own issues, lore wise, so some are lore heavy. You might not agree with some of them, but its how I see it, so to each their own. Let me know what you think! Some are quite angsty. Some scenes it's you breaking up with him and some are vice versa. Didn't feel like writing Razor, Venti and Xingqiu.
Characters: Aether, Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Baizhu, Bennett, Chongyun, Cyno, Dainsleif, Diluc, Gorou, Heizou, Itto, Kaeya, Kaveh, Kazuha, Lyney, Neuvillette, Scaramouche, Tartaglia, Thoma, Tighnari, Xiao, Zhongli, gn!reader
Personal Favourites in this work: Lyney, Itto, Kazuha
Aether
Sister issues. Enough said.
He realized he didn't have enough time to spare romancing with someone.
Somewhere along the way he felt guilt that he was enjoying his time with you while his sister went through some sort of villain origin story that seemingly turned her bad.
Top off all the adventuring, searching, solving problems for other people that he did...Where did that leave you, exactly?
"...I'm sorry, Y/N... I just... I don't think this is the right time for me to be together with you,"
Albedo
Contrary to popular belief it wouldn't be his lack of time or extreme focus on his alchemical experiments that would break the two of you up. He knows how to manage his time.
It was the RESULTS of experiments and his research that would put him away from you.
The possibility that HE or his world, was way too dangerous for you.
How many "Albedos" did Rhinedottir really create? Was there more than three? Perhaps four, five? And what happens when you come face to face with another Albedo?
"I'm afraid...There are far too many dangers surrounding myself... There are answers that I can't find...and perhaps that's the reason why my answer is to part ways with you,"
Alhaitham
Too much of a nonchalant attitude.
He expressed some kind of interest in you...but it's like... once in a blue moon. 95% of the time you're not sure if he's really into you. It almost seems like he's more into that book he reads all the time.
Simply just not good at expressing himself. Like, at all. Hides behind a "whatever works" and "I don't care about what other people think of me" attitude, unfortunately that seems to include you.
Is so straightforward that sometimes it hurts, but he's really just telling the truth through logical analysis.
will act like the breakup didn't hurt nor affect him at all. In turn it hurts you instead.
"I see. So you've had enough of me... And you only spoke up now? Pointing it out earlier could've diverted us from this path...If that's how you feel already I suggest that we stop seeing each other,"
"That's it? You're not even going to try and work it out with me?"
"What's there to work out? You've made yourself clear. You're not satisfied with the way I treat you, and I'm afraid I'm not going to change the way I act just for your pleasure... It'd be more meaningful for you to find someone who fits your criterias,"
Ayato
entering a relationship with a noble was not as easy as one thought.
It's not just about being together forever and feeling lucky because Ayato is rich and your whole life is set, it's also the not fitting in, the etiquette, the whispers from townfolk that you were too ordinary for him, the work that you needed to do if you were to become his wife.
All that was not really a big problem for you, but Ayato seemed not to know of your struggles, he was extremely busy, and when he wasn't, he seemed to think that everything was well and fine, since you were getting all your basic needs met and even more.
"...So I'm sorry, Ayato. This is just... All too much for me. I'm sorry,"
"...I understand. Forgive me, it seems that I've overlooked a lot of things...Perhaps it is as you say, that it'd be better for us to grow apart rather than grow together,"
Baizhu
because he is a ticking time bomb, no matter which way he looked it's not going to end well for both of you.
He either dies early or lives forever. In both scenarios he anticipates that the two of you are just going to be in a world of hurt.
Besides, he didn't mean to get so attached to someone in the first place, he knew his quest for immortality was long and arduous. You didn't deserve to walk that difficult road too.
While breaking up, will conceal the fact that he's only thinking of you and will possibly hurt you in the process.
"I'm sorry, but it's for the best. I ask that you continue going forward without me, there's no space for you in my... ideal future,"
Bennett
We all know it...it's his bad luck. However, it wasn't YOU who had a problem with it, it was HIM.
You understood that his bad luck was just some extended part of him, plus it's not like it was always bad, there were a lot of good times too. Plenty!
But the guilt ate him up whenever the two of you were stuck in a seemingly impossible scenario and predicament, brought on by his luck. He just had enough of it one day.
"I...I can't keep doing this to you every day! It's not fair..."
will be on the brink of tears before he even starts.
"Maybe it's better if you find someone else to adventure with, Y/N, sorry...!"
runs away before you can even get a word in.
Chongyun
Thinks he's not good enough in every aspect. It's really, seriously not about you. He thinks he's lacking in everything. Strength, maturity, experience, confidence.
So badly wants to stay with you but feels like he's not good enough and thinks that you're better off with someone else.
"D-Don't misunderstand... It's not because I don't like you anymore... I just...Please find someone else!"
Cyno
his bad jokes and TCG addiction. just kidding, you're not that shallow.
A lot of people are intimidated by him being the General Mahamatra because he gives importance to justice. While you, who had seen a bit more of him than other people had, it seemed more of an obsession to uphold the Akademiya's law and integrity.
This was not a big problem to you, you liked how he was serious at work.
Until one day when you were accused of plagiarising one of your papers and Cyno was the one sent to give you a first offense warning. The Akademiya knew of your relationship, that's probably why they sent him, to make it harder on the two of you.
Cyno didn't listen to your explanations on how it was an honest mistake, he still gave you the warning that you "deserved"
From then on it had just been different between the two of you, so it was really a mutual breakup. Or so you thought.
"...After that, I just realized that maybe this isn't the right time for us... We're both working for the Akademiya, we both take our jobs seriously...Unfortunately that seems to just be getting in the way of us...I think it's best if we stop seeing each other,"
"...I see." he pauses for a minute, as if tossing your words in his mind. "I...agree. Parting ways would certainly make work easier for both of us...it's the professional thing to do,"
Dainsleif
Has not moved on from his past.
Sure, everyone has their own baggage to carry, their own history to live through...but Dainsleif has heavier things than that. He seemed to wake up every day thinking of Khaenri'ah and the days long past. Was it regret? Nostalgia? Loneliness? You didn't know. You just knew that he wasn't really completely THERE with you in the present. Part of him still lived in the past.
When you explained that you felt like the two of you were not moving forward together and that it seemed like he wanted to go back to the past instead, he got offended.
"...My past is something that I carry forever, you'd claimed that you understood that," he starts.
"I do! But carrying it with you and letting it drag you backwards are two different things!"
He falters for a moment, only to leave you with his last words before turning away from you forever: "You will never understand, the weight that I carry,"
Diluc
is too guarded. You'd been friends for a long, long, long, long time before he decided he could let you in enough and be more intimate with you.
Even then everything was going at a snail's pace, though you were extremely patient with him.
The biggest problem with Diluc was that the two of you would progress one day, take a step forward, and then the next day it was like the two of you took two steps back.
Example: The two of you went out for a simple stargazing excursion late one night, it was nice and he had been incredibly affectionate. The next day he had trouble even meeting your gaze, and disappeared to do his work. It was also a little awkward during dinnertime. This scenario had happened more than once.
Hint: the closer he got to you the more afraid he became, thinking that he would one day lose you too.
"I...I can't. I love you but I...I've waited far too long. I'm sorry. I'm tired of this endless chase for you!"
He couldn't even say a thing. He'd wanted to ask you to stay, to wait for him a little longer, but he already knew how incredibly selfish that would have been. Instead, he grimaced, and looked away from your gaze, trying to find something worthwhile to say. There was only silence for a few moments.
"Goodbye Diluc," that's when you turned away.
Gorou
worships Kokomi too much and your insecurities just kept circling around in your head.
You know its his job. You know he isn't like that but the problem was YOU and not him.
Simply said you let your insecurity eat up the relationship between the two of you.
You couldn't bring yourself to say that you were jealous of the way he admired Kokomi so you broke up with him with another reason in tow.
Unfortunately, you're not a very good liar face to face so you did a butthole move and actually broke up with him through a letter. You just couldn't face him and tell him why.
All you mentioned in the letter was that you needed time to think and be away from him, and told him not to worry because it was your problem, not his.
Poor Gorou reread that letter over and over, trying to understand what went wrong.
Heizou
is just a natural flirt. You're not sure if he's doing it on purpose or not and you're not sure if he's even aware he's like that.
Anyway you'd seen him getting overly friendly (just another word for flirting) with a few other people a couple of times. You didn't let it get to you the first, fourth or even eighth time but you realized that he KNOWS that you're watching him do that.
So you confront him about it, but he claims that it's just his way of gathering information from others. People like to hear good things and some people are more susceptible to flirtatious comments so he resorts to that for his investigation sometimes.
You didn't really completely buy it and even if you did, it's not like this was healthy for your relationship. You just couldn't make yourself comfortable with it.
*You just chalked it up to the two of you being incompatible.
"I'm just not comfortable with that...I don't think I have to say sorry for how I feel but...I'm sorry anyway because I know you're just doing your job... It's probably best if we part ways here..."
"Is there any way to change your mind?" he genuinely asks.
You only give a lopsided smile. "You're a detective, I think you already know the answer to that,"
Yet he didn't stop you from walking away.
Itto
Kept breaking promises because he was too airheaded or too occupied doing something "stupid" with the kids or with his gang.
Pretty soon it just felt like you were an afterthought while everyone else in his life took precedent.
Got a ramen date? Oops, sorry! Got caught up looking for a strong onikabuto in the forest!
Needed his help to move some things? Gah, he was vandalising the bulletin boards, so he's running a bit late!
What's more you didn't actually mind that carefree, airheaded side of him...but it really got to you when he couldn't even seem to make you a priority. Not once.
He only realized that when he came running, late again, and stood face to face with a crying you.
"Hey sorry Y/N, I was just--...Why are you crying?!" is completely dumbfounded and clueless, mostly because when he came late, you had always shrugged it off with a smile on your face, or so he thought. This time you had a completely different reaction.
"I hate you...*hic* I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!"
Shocked beyond belief. It wasn't like you to just blow up like that, but he couldn't do anything except watch you turn and run away from him after that exclamation.
Kaeya
Sometimes you're not sure if he takes you seriously.
Recently, he's not where he says he is, you don't know why he doesn't just tell you where he is.
He said he'd be working late, but then you find out he's at Angel's Share.
He said he'll be at Angel's Share, but then you catch word from Jean that he's out on a late mission.
He said he's escorting a caravan to Mondstadt but he's actually on assignment in Liyue.
It came to the point where you altogether just stopped looking for him cause half of the time you couldn't find him. It's like he's avoiding you or something, which, actually, seems just about right since he's been so busy with "work"
It reached a breaking point when, for a week, you were unable to bring him the lunch you prepared...because he was not where he said he was going to be. It was starting to get annoying.
"I don't understand why you're lying to me! Why do you have to tell me you'll be at Angel's Share this afternoon when you're not? Do you realize you make me walk all the way there only to come all the way back with nothing achieved?"
"I'm sorry snowflake, that wasn't my intention," though he still chuckles despite knowing full well that you were about to turn away.
"You know what, let me know when you're ready to stop making jokes. Until then, don't bother contacting me,"
He just didn't expect you to actually walk away from him.
Kaveh
Entertains everyone and anyone. Naturally kind at heart, will stop for anyone in trouble...even that flirtatious man/woman who is clearly just pining for his attention.
No he doesn't quite realize this.
The same person had asked for his help at least 4 times now and all 4 times he had been happy to offer a helping hand.
The last straw was when he was invited into the stranger's house, they had apparently needed someone to help them move and re-arrange furniture and he did, working till almost dinner time.
You'd caught him right by the person's door, because Kaveh was actually honest and told you he'd be helping them today, but the person was clearly eyeing Kaveh rather flirtatiously.
"Come again next time," you heard the person say rather happily. Kaveh only replies with "If I have nothing else to do, I suppose,"
"Kaveh, they're coming onto you and you keep letting it happen!"
"I'm not certain what you're talking about...They just needed some help around their house, nothing suspicious happened at all. Even if there was, I won't let anything happen between me and a stranger!"
"Then STOP helping them!"
"There isn't anything wrong with lending a hand...It was a quick move of things, that's all,"
"How would YOU feel if I just went into someone's house and kept helping them "move" things?"
"...I would think that's nice of you,"
You actually threw your hands up. "Oh, forget it! You know what, for someone who LOVES helping others, you're not doing such a great job of helping ME," then walked away and never came back. "Good riddance,"
Kazuha
He's a wandering samurai. You knew what you were getting into but you didn't expect dating him to be so hard.
He was gone for weeks on end, and you were not getting on that boat with him. In essence the two of you were just not ready to follow each other to the end's of the Earth, and that was fair. The two of you were young.
Kazuha kind of saw it coming, whenever he visited you, you seemed less spirited and he had an inkling as to why. The time apart was just too much for you.
It was a rather clean break actually. A real mutual breakup that the two of you agreed on.
"...You could say it's just not the right time for us," you even managed to laugh under your breath and he did the same, though it was barely audible.
"...Mm. There are matters that you need to attend to here...and there are things that I need to do out there," he slowly stood up from his sitting position next to you and still gazed at you rather lovingly. "...Perhaps, in another world, you and I are bound together,"
You gazed back forlornly, "...Just not in this one, it looks like,"
Lyney
because he will always choose his siblings over you. Always.
Though that's not a bad thing because you also think that family is important...somewhere along the way you realized that family is the ONLY thing he had and saw.
Example: Lynette and you had gotten ill at the same time one winter morning. Perhaps it was the cold that was passing around Fontaine. Lyney had been so worried about Lynette, that he seemed to have forgotten about you for the next few days. In fact, Lyney didn't even realize that you caught the cold too. You had only heard from Freminet, who you happened to cross paths with, that Lynette was also ill.
You thought that incident was the end of it, but really it seemed that whenever Lyney wanted to hang out with you, Lynette had to be there too. You tried to understand...after all there's still that mystery of disappearing women in Fontaine.
The breakup was induced when Lyney completely forgot about your birthday, because Freminet's was around the same time as yours. You helped Lyney prepare everything for Freminet, and said nothing about your own.
You realized that there was nothing wrong with choosing family over everything else...but the problem here was that Lyney didn't even have space for you in the first place.
So you left without saying anything. You figured he'd get over it quick. You had even gone so far as to move away from the main city of Fontaine and out into another island, because what would you say if he found you? That you were jealous of his siblings? You weren't going to ruin a family like that and it wasn't right to make him choose...so you just left without a word.
Neuvillette
Had a whole brainrot for this man:
Part 1
Part 2
Scaramouche
surprisingly it's not his anger issues.
It's the way he wouldn't acknowledge your relationship. You wonder how you even got into one with him.
There's no public show of affection, but even behind closed doors it rarely happened.
You knew that he was going to be like that, and so you didn't mind it all that much.
It was getting a bit much though when, out in public, he would walk further in front of you and refused to walk next to you. When he pretended like he didn't even know you. When he didn't stop to help you even when another man had shown interest in you, bordering on uncomfortable.
The more time passed the more you simply felt unloved...but for some reason you still blamed yourself.
"...I...don't know. Maybe you find me undesirable, or just...unappealing. Maybe you're embarrassed of me or...or..." maybe you just didn't care in the first place, you thought to yourself.
There was a long silence. Of you turning your gaze away, of him still piercing into yours. And then...
"Tsk...don't waste my time...Leave if you want to leave, door's open,"
Tartaglia
This one is simple. It's his obsession for fighting plus his complete disregard for himself. It's a constant heart attack for you. At some point the anxiety is just too much for you to handle.
Imagine living every day just wondering if he's safe at the same time knowing that he just loves to look for trouble.
The foul legacy that you know of, he uses it with disregard as well, despite knowing that it wasn't good for him.
And there are even days where you know he was heavily wounded but didn't go to you, in an attempt to shield you from worry.
It's a constant battle trying to stay sane and unworried, until one day it all just becomes too much.
"...Nothing I say will change anything, Tartaglia. This is who you are...This is who you need to be..." you whisper while bandaging his knuckles. He lets out a short hum.
It was silent all up until you finished with his hand, you squeeze it gently. "...I love you but...I can't keep doing this to myself, I'm tired...more so than I have ever been before,"
He lets your hand slip away from his knuckles, and that was the last he saw of you.
Thoma
This one is also simple. He was always taking care of others and running errands for others that he sometimes just couldn't catch a break.
Just a classic case of not enough time for you since he had a job to do for the Kamisato Clan.
He knows it, and feels awful about it. So he's the one who makes the move.
"It hurts that I can't give you what you deserve, Y/N. This isn't it... You deserve more than this but I can't give you that and I'm sorry. Please look for the love that you deserve,"
Tighnari
Remembers everything. Can be critical of things you've done, specially if he thinks there's a better way to do it.
Simply said you just feel stupid in front of him sometimes.
He doesn't mean to, but he sometimes forgets to appreciate or give praise to the things that you do well and even if he does, it tends to be short lived compared to his constructive criticisms.
Pretty soon you felt like he only looks at the bad things you do, and never the good. Though he was really only trying to teach and guide you as an equal.
He in fact feels that you are one of the few people who can keep up educational conversations with him.
The problem is he kind of forgets that you're his lover, and that you would enjoy his praise and affection from time to time.
"Do you... Do you ever have anything nice to say other than 'good work' or 'great observation'?" the words were out of your mouth before you could hold yourself back. Sometimes it was tiring to feel like you weren't good enough.
There's a flash of surprise that crosses Tighnari's expression for a split second, before he recovers. "...Had I not been praising your work enough lately? My apologies... It has a lot of merits, I just thought that you wanted my opinion on how to make it better,"
You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it again right after to ponder on his words. Somehow even that had managed to make you feel embarrassed. It was here you knew that the problem also lied within yourself.
"...Sorry, Tighnari...I think I'll need some time alone,"
He obliges quickly and asks. "That's reasonable. When would you like me to come back?"
"...Let me rephrase that... I need some time away. From us."
Xiao
Unfortunately there's a lot of things wrong here... his lack of affection. His aloof personality. His dedication to his yaksha duties. Despite that he does actually try to be gentlemanly or respectful of you.
The worst of it is that he didn't know how to be in a relationship, in other words he just wasn't ready for one, or perhaps he would never be ready for one.
He didn't understand that humans craved companionship and sometimes touch. He didn't understand that meant having to favour you over others, sometimes even putting you first over his yaksha duties.
Worst of it all was when he shut himself off from you, sometimes for days on end, when his karmic debt was too high. He only really did it to protect you, but never realized how isolated that made you feel.
When you confronted him about it, he felt attacked. Hiding away was the only way he knew how to cope...why couldn't you understand that?
"Let me help you, Xiao,"
"I don't need your help!" his tone would make you wince and just like that he disappears into a billow of smoke.
You never returned to Wangshu Inn after that. If he couldn't let you in, there was no use trying to knock on his heart. Xiao being Xiao, never sought you ought again either.
Zhongli
He had experienced so many things and you had listened to many a tales from him.
This is what caused you to realize that you hadn't even experienced life at all, and yet here you were willing to tie yourself down to him.
It just didn't feel like it added up. Here he was with all this knowledge of the world and here you were who had never even stepped outside of Liyue. By no means were you stupid, but you felt that you could be better not only for him, but for yourself if you learned more.
There was just such a huge gap in life experiences, and though you never expected to get to his level (he was a God who had lived for a long time, you would never catch up to him) you at least wanted to see what was out there with your own eyes instead of through his stories.
He understood that wholeheartedly, and had no qualms in letting you go.
"You will always have a place with me, Y/N. No amount of lifetimes will change that,"
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Disclaimer: Relationships will always have some sort of problem along the way, maybe big, maybe small but I just want to reiterate that breaking up is not always the solution. Communicating is very important. So to those of you who like taking fanfiction too seriously, let it be known that this is just a work of fiction. I don't actually suggest breaking up with someone as soon as there is the slight indication of a problem (Just saw someone commenting on a similar themed post for Haikyuu that this wouldn't happen in the real world if both parties were mature... I mean, sure, but, idk, you must be fun in parties... it's called fiction for a reason...)
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yanf4iry · 3 months ago
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oh, my dear wife ♡
wc 2.1k
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husband! alhaitham x afab! reader
modern! au. breast play. fingering. oral (fem). overuse of the words ‘my wife’ but he’s in awe. probably overuse of ‘love’ and ‘darling’ too. lovey dovey alhaitham. ‘love making.’ still slightly teasing alhaitham. subtle breeding kink. afab autonomy. unprotected sex (pls be safe!). pls lmk if anythimg has been missed.
there could be spelling/gramma so pls lmk if there’s anything to be fixed mwah <333
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"my darling," alhaitham spoke gently, coming up behind you, his hands lovingly capsuling around your waist as his chin came down to rest upon your shoulder. "i was thinking of ordering a fish curry and a bottle of wine to our room tonight, rather than going down to the restaurant to eat," he continued, expressing his thoughts to you. "just wanna spend the night alone together."
he nuzzled further against your neck, humming softly in contentment as the feeling of your soft skin brushed against his flushed cheeks. "how does that sound?" he asked, turning you around so you were facing him, "i thought it'd be perfect for our first night together as a married couple."
alhaitham gazed down at you lovingly, the smile on his face unmoveable as he mentioned the fact that you were husband and wife. he proposed to you just over a year ago and ever since he's been beyond eager to finally arrive at the day he can officially call you his wife.
"sounds perfect.." you hum back, enjoying the touch of his warm and firm hands against the curve of your waist.
alhaitham pulled away from you softly, going over to the small desk towards the front door of the extremely fancy hotel room you were staying in for the next 10 days. "so what are you thinking, love?" he asks "red or white?" he continues, referring to the wine he previously spoke about ordering.
"red."
"you read my mind," he grins happily before dialing the restaurant downstairs and requesting room service.
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the night eventually started to pass, and you found yourselves curled up on the sofa; you snuggled against his chest and his arm trailed over your shoulder, slowly getting through that bottle of red wine he had ordered just over an hour ago.
you catch him gazing down at you, a look you could only recognise as awe and admiration. "what?" you giggle, a light blush covering your face as your eyes intertwine in an intense gaze.
"you're gorgeous.." alhaitham mumbled, his gaze not budging from your face. "perfect, even," he continued, rubbing his slender hands against the skin of your upper arm.
"i've never been so thankful to have someone in my life, let alone have the same person as my wife; who i intend to spend forever and always with.."
his words struck a chord in your heart, reddening your cheeks. "getting flustered, are we?" alhaitham chuckled, a little smirk on his face, "well get used to it.." he leans down and whispered in your ear, his hot breath causing a shiver to erupt down your spine "you've got a lifetime of compliments just like it."
after a couple moments of silence, his fingers slowly started to edge towards the hem of your shirt, dipping under it slightly to let his fingertips softly caress the skin of your lower stomach. a small sigh left your lips at the feeling, enjoying the gentle and loving touches he often grazed on your skin.
alhaitham cleared his throat, his hand moving up a little, inching ever so closer to your waist. "you know.. umm.." he started up, amusement laced in his voice, "there's still one honeymoon tradition we've not gotten around to doing yet," he continued, a smirk tugging on his lips; even though you couldn't see it, you knew it was there.
"and what would that be?"
he replied with a small tut, shaking his head playfully. "oh.. don't make me say it," he spoke up "you know what i mean."
"and what would you like me to do about it?" you ask, turning your head a little so your gaze was now meeting his.
"let me take you to bed," alhaitham spoke without hesitation, that same look of admiration he had on his face "if you'd be so kind.."
and with that, you found yourself laid out on the bed you shared, his tall, slim body hovering over yours. he leaned down, capturing your lips in a soft, yet passionate kiss; full of need and desire, but most importantly, love.
his hands found their way back to the hem of your shirt, fiddling with it slightly, slowly growing more impatient by the second. alhaitham was always, more often than not, gentle in bed but this felt different; not saying he ever lacked passion, but this felt beyond passionate, beyond loving. it was almost as if he craved to be close to you like his entire being needed it.
"may i take it off?" alhaitham asked gently, tugging at your shirt a little, pulling away from your lips so he could look into your eyes; trying to look for any hint of uncertainty or discomfort, and thankfully, he found none.
you nod in response, a small smile painting your face just before he slowly pulled your shirt over your head. you hadn't been wearing a bra in this moment, i mean, what was the need? you were snuggling on the couch with your husband. a deep breath left his throat as he revealed your bare chest.
"i meant it when i said you were perfect, you know?" alhaitham said, voice sounding genuine. he looked at you like you were the most precious thing in the world. well, to him, you were. you were his wife and there was nothing more precious than that.
"you're only saying that because you're close to getting me naked," you giggle softly, teasing him subtly.
"getting you naked is always a bonus," alhaitham spoke back, "but i truly do mean it, you're perfect," he added, "my perfect, perfect wife."
his hand raised towards your breasts, gently caressing them as his lips moved down to meet yours; them intertwining in a soft and loving dance. "you're so soft.." he mumbled against your lips, pressing his body up against yours.
you could feel his arousal growing against your thigh, the hard-on in his slacks extremely hard to hide as his hips subconsciously moved to gain some friction. his fingers tips came to enclose around your nipple, gently playing with it, his mouth swallowing your tiny moans; he refused to move his lips from yours, desperate to feel you. "i need you so bad.."
slowly, his kisses started moving from your lips and down to your neck, him taking the time to suck and bite the delicate skin there; however, not harsh enough to leave any marks or bruises, he was often careful as he knew they were a pain to cover. your heartbeat quickens and your breath paces as his soft lips edge ever so closer to your breasts, him eventually taking your nipple in his mouth, hand continuing to nurse the other.
quiet moans left your mouth as he pleasured you further, head tilted back a little. alhaitham's gaze raised a little, locking eyes with yours for a few subtle seconds, smirking slightly at how the smallest of touches always managed to get you going. "perfect.." he whispered out once again, never missing a moment to remind you how truly in awe he was of you.
"alhaitham.. please.." you whine out, grinding against his hips a little, resulting in a gentle grunt escaping his lips.
"does my beautiful wife need me?" he asks, his voice slightly teasing, but he knew you loved it when he was at least a little cocky with you during bed. "does she need me as much as i need her?"
his hands trail down to the waistband of the sleep shorts you were wearing, looking up at you once more in search of the consent for him to move on. without hesitation, once he received your permission of course, he pulled them down revealing your embarrassingly soaked core to him.
alhaitham grunted at the sight, his hand coming to wrap around your waist, pulling you closer towards him, kissing your lips gently, fingers needing at the skin of your waist. "my wife.." he whispers against your lips, "i'll make you feel good, okay?" alhaitham continues, "that's all i ever want to do."
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not even moments later, his wet, warm lips were trailing towards your inner thighs, gently littering kisses everywhere but where you truly needed him. his hands were firmly placed on your hips, fingertips dancing along the miniature stretchmarks there.
a small whimper leaves your lips as his mouth wrapped around your throbbing clit; he was a pleaser, and oh god, was he pleasing you right now. he knew what to do with his tongue without a doubt, exploring your wet folds.
"oh- god.." you whine gently, hand moving to his head, gripping at his soft hair as his mouth worked its wonders. "too good.. s-shit-" you manage to gasp out, hips subtly bucking up against his mouth which only made him chuckle lowly against you.
"like that, my wife?" he mumbles against you before indulging in you for much longer. it wasn't long before you found yourself getting closer to your high, the many noises from your lips getting louder and louder by the second.
"mmhm," you moan out, "just like that."
"are you close, baby?" he whispers against you, fingers teasing your entrance a little, edging two digits inside you, stretching you out making your eyes roll back a little from the overwhelming pleasure. "cum for me, my wife-"
and with that, you were clenching around his fingers as he curved them inside you, brushing up against g-spot with every motion he made, giving you almost no time to process anything before you were cumming against his mouth; legs shaking, and mouth wide open.
"fuck- fuck-" you whimper, legs shaking around his head.
alhaitham's head moved from between your legs, a little smirk on his face as he watched the way your body twitched for him. "let me fill you, darling..." he whispers, hands flying to pull down the slacks he was wearing. "i need to be in you," he continued, revealing his hard cock that was evidently desperate for attention.
"alhaitham please.." you whisper out, watching the way his hand slowly tugged on his length, biting your lip in anticipation. "i need you just as bad."
a gentle moan left your lips, accompanied by a similar noise coming from alhaitham, as he pushed the tip of his cock inside you. "good heavens-" he moans out, hands tightly grasped onto your waist as he pushed himself further inside you, not stopping until he was all the way in.
"tell me when i can move, my love.." alhaitham spoke in a hushed voice, smiling down at you as he watched your face contort in pleasure. "you're doing so well."
after a few short moments, you gave him the clear to start moving, and with the way your wet walls were gripping onto his thick cock, you didn't have to tell him twice.
his thrusts were soft but deep, hitting all the places you need him to be, moans falling from both your lips at the pace of his thrusts. "so good-" alhaitham gasped out, feeling your walls clench around him subconsciously "my perfect, beautiful wife," he gritted out between each movement of his hips.
the tip of his length was pressing up against your cervix every chance it got, making you want to squeal from how good it truly felt. "you're so deep.." you choke out, eyes rolling back and teeth dug tightly into your bottom lip.
"hmm?" alhaitham hums back in response, staring down at you as his thrusts remained the same pace; deep and slow, different to how he usually was. with alhaitham sex was always wild, fast and hard, not because he didn't care but because that's the way you both liked it. he loved making you see stars in the most unimaginable ways, but tonight.. he was soft, passionate and gentle like he was almost scared you'd break. he was pouring every ounce of love and feeling he had into it, making it something completely new.
"do you think im deep enough to get you nice and full with my child, my perfect, pretty wife?" he asks, grabbing a hand full of one of your breasts as he makes the effort to push himself inside you with a little more pressure.
the question made you whimper a little, but it was audibly a few octaves higher because of the shock of hearing it. you'd briefly spoken about possibly having kids before, and alhaitham had always said that he'd like them but it was always your choice, but it's not a topic of discussion that came up a lot so it was a surprise to hear those words come out of his mouth.
"would you like that, darling.." he spoke softly, caressing the skin of your lower stomach. "i know we haven't spoken about it much, but i cant help think about how pretty you'd look pregnant."
"my gorgeous, wonderful, perfect wife, all pregnant just for me."
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