#ah i dunno what i think
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Little Beast - r.s.
#ah i dunno what i think#i was originally planning to just do two separate gifs because i like making clean gifs#but i tried this so?#buddie#evan buckley#eddie diaz#911#911edit#911 abc#911 fox#mine: gif#mine#richard siken
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An eye for a life, unquestionably worth it (Patreon)
#Doodles#ISaT#Siffrin#Bonnie#Blood#It's been *checks watch* nine months??? since I last drew an empty eye socket???#Not even ZEX got that treatment how could this be :0 It's such a Look#I guess it's only been a couple months since I posted Diaryfic!Edgar but that was drawn a while ago - Sif is new and fresh blood <3#I'm sure they're stoked about it lol sorry Sif#That really was my entire motivation I just wanted to draw eye horror and blood on him lol poor Sif#But also I got to practice Bonnie :D Again I'm sure they're stoked about the situation#Gosh that'd be such a scary situation for a kid :'0 And feeling guilty about it weh </3#Their name being called and it's scary and sad even tho Sif's just trying to comfort! Weh#If I thought about it in a Bit less of an angst mood (lol) I imagine the other adults would flock to Sif both to protect/help him#But also to keep him out of Bonnie's line of sight - the less time spent looking the less traumatic hopefully :(#There's something Very about Sif getting blood - his own or anyone's really - on his cloak :0#Something he's had for a long long time and Something Happens - it's just Very I dunno of what but Very#Really fun to draw the black and white blood splatter ♪ Shaped character design paired with soft details ah <3#I've been really into that hazy fuzzy eye style lately too it's really fun to ''tone'' the eye rather than ''line'' it#It's not something I think about that much so I don't do it often! But it's quite effective :D
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Talk about haunting the narrative huh
#hiccup horrendous haddock ii#hiccup horrendous haddock iii#hiccup horrendous haddock i#finally designing what I think they look like#the first hiccup gives me kind and mature vibes#I made his clothing older and more royal looking cuz they used to live on the mainland#i feel like grimbeard’s era was very piratey so that’s the second’s aesthetic#I wish there were more aus of them meeting in like a timeslip or sumthin#gotta do everything myself smh#I dunno if I hate or like the third’s belt placement#shoulda given the second a pirate coat or something he’s too plain#ah well -w-#my art#digital art#how to train your dragon#httyd fanart#httyd#httyd books
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I did it, I finally made a bluesky account
You too can come and follow me to watch me post nothing at all:
#personal#it's there! i dunno what I'm gonna put there!!#i think i still have a twitter i need to get rid of#ah... busy busy...#anyway there u go if u wanna find me there i am#i may add stuff to it in the next couple of days who knows
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Silly Game Time: WRONG ANSWERS ONLY! Where do babies come from?
(And if you took part in yesterday's Monster Making game, the results are here: https://www.tumblr.com/jkl-fff/767237588718403584/the-monster-we-all-made-in-silly-game-time)
Same way that I explained it earlier. The ceiling tiles in the hospital room begin to rattle and the light fixtures begin swinging side to side and then a rift opens up to an unknown dimension and the child is drop kicked into the wall by a pelican. This is normal.
therapy for those who got hit by the drop kicked child and had their face smashed in like a brick to the front of my car from the fifth story of the University of I'm Aroace And I Don't Fuck Around is optional
#children#ah yes what a perfectly sane sounding tag#asexual#aroace#nobody can stop me from making stupid aroace jokes#whether or not they seem entirely coherent#aroace jokes#it doesn't get better than this#also did you get it? did you get the joke?#yes I do think I'm the funniest person in the room#Am I wrong? We have yet to see...#asexual mafia#aromantic#aro#ace#I dunno am I tagging this excessively?#ah who gives a shit anyways
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#altaria#here it is… the bird that turns into a dragon-type because reasons…#i still don't think just from looking at this thing that they should be a dragon-type. i feel like it still seems out-of-place given their#design but HONESTLY i like it. i think it's a cool like. subversion. type thing. i would not look at swablu and be like Yeah that evolves#into a dragon-type. and apparently a really good one at that? i believe i've heard good things about altaria#ugh. good things. got a selection of GOOD THINGS on sale‚ stranger… my brain does that sometimes#when i hear or say innocuous phrases it's like HEY that's the same thing this OTHER guy said in this QUOTE you've heard before#dunno WHY but. it happens. and it just happened there. but altaria i dunno it's a dragon-type and that's awesome. i don't remember what i#said i was gonna talk about on the swablu post yesterday wrt altaria and i am too lazy to look back at those tags to remember#hi it's me morning of this posting at like 7 AM. i remembered bc i just looked. i was gonna ask if they were good competitively#and. i'm pretty sure they are. ALRIGHT LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SMOGON#ah okay not busted but generally good i guess. latest information states RU in gen 9 but UU in a lot of other gens. NU and PU in there too#bounced around a lot i guess. but here's my question. why? do i care#it's cute. and i don't care if they're strong or not… because they're cute…
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come get your levitous sidekick / vicious bastard / funny little guys
#don't tell the sheriff. that a couple of outlaws are having uh a halfhearted tussle or really cozy talk if you like#there's like a dozen of us here & i'm standing in another room saying this but a rando crops up like how & why have you just been around??#let's kick off '25 with Not That....meanwhile so totally unrelatedly i'm looking for a sexy singer & you're doing finger stuff; buddy#putting the g in g spot by way of: stands for gator. clench & death roll....but no. he's a crocodile. lotta options for c spots#corned beef#bsol#coconana#messed up like bloodsong is so Fun Sketches to me but even those take me eons. why couldn't i have done twice these in one sitting plus#a winston quant billions going :] plus i dunno whatever else floated my boat. unfortunately b/c then it wouldn't be me doing my things....#only 2/5 of these from canon but as gone on about idk where the Fake Blood was involved in turkey leg. just that it was. so#also didn't think about [sidebar with myself you forgot like angel & backlighting type imagery for Introducing Santa Violetta] like ah#so i did. well whaddaya gonna do...find & reblog the post that's like speaking of likeaprayer striking me like head first prayer second#smthing along the lines of ''muffled by dick in my mouth: lmao faggot'' there's some plausible coconana antics lol. steps; intervals....#can't have it be like ''be tender w/me bro im begging / bro im trying to find your g spot'' wouldn't beg for tenderness (cocodrilo)#or call anyone bro or much similar (either of them) like maybe i've waive the latter to try applying that to the musician/banana but yknow#in the meantime. funny little guys i cannot overemphasize this. bloodsong of love i also cannot overemphasize this#bilesong of hate....don't get me wrong Not a case where i only enjoy certain elements plucked out of canon / not as a whole#did i ever listen to that show straight through w/Ease....but if it Had been nothing but a vessel for lo cocodrilo times. god Damn#lo cocodrilo#bsol banana#also didn't think about how lo cocodrilo doesn't let go of the kazoo even to play it. mostly inadvertent Choice for top pic there#an issue that quickly arises w/like a prayer specifically: these characters don't have names. what's that mean peak literal lens?#i.e. seeing bsol itself as the less than totally literal method of storytelling that it is....idk & it wouldn't super matter#but i sure do think it'd be fun if they're treated as / perhaps actually [no name] on any possible layer of interpretation#[rando who firstnamed themself but besides that it's like eh & Where My Outlaws the less known the okayer]
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Okay, but what about og SoapGhost meeting reboot SoapGhost, and they are all just super confused about what the fuck is going on.
Soap is constantly getting into arguments with Johnny because he can't really stand the thought that there is another version of himself, and since Johnny doesn't like getting treated like shit, he fights back and they're basically at each other's throats all the time.
Meanwhile Ghost is somewhat scared of the thought that LT is another version of him, and therefore probably the only person who knows Simon Riley as good as he himself does. It is a terrifying thought that LT is aware about all of Ghost's weaknesses and stuff, and so he's always super careful around him.
Plot twist: LT actually hasn't gone through all the shit Ghost has been going through in his past. He's just some weird guy with a mask who likes to creep out newbies with his appearance and behavior. And since over time this whole image of the mysterious and somewhat intimidating soldier called Ghost had began to stick with him he just went with it. So when Ghost actually manages to speak up on the topic of "their past" LT is confused because in contrast to Ghost nothing really traumatizing happened in his past, except for like the usual military stuff.
#I dunno#I just thought Soap and Johnny constantly being at each others throats would be entertaining#Soap really doesn't like the thought that this guy seems to be him#meanwhile Johnny actually thinks it's kinda cool to have another version of himself in front of him#sadly that version acts like an asshole :')#the idea of reboot ghost not having a traumatic past and instead just being a lil weird is something I read on tumblr some time ago#and I liked the idea and thought in a scenario like this were he would meet og ghost who has gone through shit what would happen?#I kinda wanna write something about this but#I have to much bullshit started so I really can't :')#ah yes LT also doesn't like soap in the slightest because he just keeps being an ass towards his johnny#meanwhile ghost and johnny actually get along quite well#whenever ghost spends some time with LT or Johnny & then gets back to soap he's like#'welcome home cheater' :')#soapghost#ghostsoap#call of duty#cod#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty modern warfare 2#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#writing#clancy writes#writing ideas
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THINKING ABOUT.
Universe contamination. WAIT before anybody says Oh doc’s gone off the deep end This is an oc project.
Kind of started as an explanation for why when my friends and I did crossovers it went off the rails? Also because of how my writing changed over time, ha. (of course you know you can’t have an adventure story without something going wrong but still.) Whenever somebody visits Jer, peoples around them are more… aggressive? Heightened emotions? (shoutout to Finch)
And on the other hand when Jer visits other people they’re able to calm down any situations very well, and just bring positive vibes! But it’s very exhausting for Some Reason.
I’m not sure how jer got the idea, probably a slow realization/looking back or maybe confirmation bias and none of it is real! Haha!
Contamination is a Major worry Jer has! They’re paranoid that outsiders staying too long and butterfly-effecting things/causing trouble could permanently ruin the timeline. (I think that’s what triggered him into uh shutting down his portal the first time) (and hearing about what JJ did was very worrying also-)
Lost my train of thought so I’m talking about another related idea. You know how in movies when a character is worried that Something TM is nearby but the other characters tell them not to worry because it’s not real? Irl we don’t have to worry and you can reassure yourself because Science, but in the movie they’re right to worry because the creature can be seen and really does exist. Jer knows the ‘creature’ exists, therefore that Threat is always there and nothing others say will fully reassure him, and he’s right to think that. Uh my thoughts. Losing my train of thought. [insert that meme of me by a conspiracy board]
(Orrrrr contamination isn’t actually because of universe magic but becauseeee of the way the worlds are slightly different and the way visitors act and talk are recieved differently? And when people are getting to know each other, first impressions do a lot? And what JJ did was an isolated incident that had a lot of warning signs beforehand? So he doesn’t have to worry? But too late, the idea’s in his head now.)
… uh oh, Jer’s trying to run an experiment by giving his friends ‘good luck charms’ and seeing if objects from their world could affect another’s if kept for a long time. Jer no!! Chill out!!
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On a fun note though, I’m giving jer night vision. wahoooo :D I might make a cool drawing for it laterrr
And thinking on Rev- I think yeah, folks in Jer’s world think he’s some kind of creature or… maybe a film star? That’d explain why he’s most often at the studio and acting dramatic HAHA- but in all seriousness I think movies there would lean on the more action filled/ more violent side (and on the contamination thing- once people got to know Rev they mellowed out so. Jer, calm down. Jer of course people are going to act oddly your various friends from ‘out of town’ have fangs, claws, unusual eyes, and demon horns) (shoutout to Caedem)
(but. But. Potentially if some dangerous ideas were introduced to Jer’s city you can’t just… take them back- like Pandora’s box. If Something made people start acting more selfish and cruel it Could contaminate the supernatural good fortune of the city. Haha what who said that? I love ideas that could go either way, that’s my jam. Who knows. (But I wouldn’t do that to them because Id have to write something complicated And it would be very sad. But the worry is real to Jer.)
Related- thinking onnnn Jer’s rat! Randy’s doing a very good job keeping them calm- annnnd explaining out loud what you’re thinking (even to a pet!) can help you realize how over-worried you are. They’re having a Mental Health Moment but are holding it together on the outside so [thumbs up]
#unrelated but. over new years I was chilling with some other people and… I dunno somebody commented on how weird my voice is.#I guess it never sunk in tIll recently. AND I don’t talk a lot to begin with so uh it doesn’t often show.#feckinggg if I wasn’t scared of doctors I’d check for. something. hrrghfdsvfbfn… ok back to oc thoughts#time to project it onto jer because I can#I kinda know what’s up though I’m probably in denial though. haha.#aH yeah some of the ocs idea here is from how twitchy I was about my characters getting hurt LMAO I was such a control freak. sorry friends#HA so forgetful it feels like I’m analyzing and making headcanons for somebody else’s story. oh boy.#unrelated I really need to think about my characters pronouns more. maybe it’s because of how similar jer and I am that I’ve given him some#to me? I just need to work through it I think [slaps desk]#jer is also vaguely worried that he should be doing more to help the other worlds- he has a great affinity for magic n whatnot but like.#it’ll probably be fine they can handle themselves yeah? but the thought is always there#no I’m not giving jer my horrible paranoia (JUSTIFIED PARANOIA UNFORTUNATELY) and moral ocd what do you mean. (/joke)#unrelated I really want to talk about the horrible misunderstanding between jer and pavel because of Universe Differences but I’ll do that#when I’m more awake
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i'm likeable?
#i want my weird idiots again ngl talking to them is sooo easy ah my shoulders feel lighter just from thinking abt it#the girl i met today seems to like them too#i might meet them up if she wants i am still unsure a bit tho#but she seems to see trough something others find annoying#so i would like for them to meet up i dunno#i still have to balance the idiots my mom coming my friend from high school my other two friends from uni my ex work friends#and well studying#and all i wanna do is show my mom around the new cafes i found and finish the projects and only have math exams and meet up with jo#but i have to balance other things ahhhh#also i do not know what i will do if i do not study tmrw with the new friend#but she invited me on pancakes and i am unable to say no to overthinkers bc what if they overthink it#and i dont know hopefully we will study#0 notes to me
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it really is like:
I CAN'T DO THIS I CAN'T DO THIS I CAN'T I CAN'T I CAN'T
okay nevermind i'm fine
#lordy lord.#what are all the things i say? uhh 'surely' uhh 'christ alive' uhh 'dog'#dog i really dunno if i can keep this up except that i can and will and hopefully something will change soon#i'm giving it a year. 2 years maybe. i can last 2 years like this and i won't like it the whole time but i know i can.#thing is it's been a couple weeks. almost a month? maybe a month by now? eugh#if i think that i'm 4% of the way through and get surprised if it ends early that'll be ideal#i've already had a couple false uhh? signs? over the last month like a couple days where i think everything is turning around#i'd almost rather not get those if they're just gonna go away but i guess i appreciate the break from the spiral#ah anyway.#what do i even do
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Some scribbles :) (Patreon)
#Doodles#Original#Texture work is original sure lol#Went in hard on one of those Drawing Advice posts about ''Hey - literally just put pencil to paper and go no worries''#It was fun :D I Do still want to just doodle freely sometimes!#I still enjoy some structure to it so I ended making a grid of various like map-style textures to tell different biomes apart lol#But just general funsies scribbles were pretty good! I enjoyed the lot :)#S'good to just Make with abandon sometimes haha#I really like the hatching effect generally and it's something I want to improve at/implement more so the practice was nice there :)#Layering on paper/with only the one digital layer is always an interesting exercise in negative space and keeping things readable#I like drawing clouds with notably flat bottoms haha I think it's funny that they just sit there#I guess I'm used to cirrus clouds a lot so seeing cumulus big puffies with a clear delineation between bottom and the rest is just fun to me#They look like toys! Designed to sit! But they're just up there! How fun!#Squiggly branches/veins was something I did a tooon as a kid before I got into Drawing On Purpose y'know#Just pages and pages of branches on branches#And curls that curled away from each other - did a little bit of that with the circles and lines but not that much haha#I dunno if I still have any but it's interesting how that dwindled down to basically never over time#I definitely know what I prefer to draw these days but hmm still wonder a bit!#And loop-di-loops haha I was thinking of Erase quite a lot for that one honestly#And the way some Disney Princesses give autographs which one is it-#Belle! I remember when I got her autograph years ago and was really enamoured with the flourish :D#Grace and elegance in shape! Ah! So cool#That and RGB from TPoH haha - all these swoopies! I like them very much :)
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steroids have decided the two emotions for tonight are Gamer Rage and Deep Yearning Sadness
#marzi speaks#marzivents#i think i’ve sort of hit an energy limit tonight and it’s frustrating me. if i had to guess#probs mourning some of the energy and capability i used to have that i have to build back now#which is. manifesting at being angry that i’m rusty at splatoon lmao#sighhhh. i’m handling the concept of being disabled relatively well i think but shit is still hard abt it#i feel like talking to my brother’s friend abt it exhausted me a little. bc he said a lot of the little annoying things#the kind you can brush off as meaning well but that still add up#shit like ‘when i heard what happened i felt so sorry for you’#and comparing it to an acute injury he had. and saying he was relieved he didn’t have to medically withdraw#(having to medically withdraw from the semester has been the toughest part of this for me. i miss college so bad)#plus he like. did not seem to Get that i am Freshly Disabled!! i can’t walk out in the texas heat for very long#i have energy limits. i’m following a meds schedule (which is admittedly getting easier)#i dunno i’m just tired of it tonight i think. it’s frustrating#this got a bit more vent-y than i intended but ah well we’re here. i’ll give it the vent tag so ppl can block it if needed#i’m really lucky to know so many people that understand. because if every interaction with other people was like today’s i think i’d lose it
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picky picky fellow suffers for his character design choices
#today's art adventure#normal men innocent men very small men#[count from sesame street voice] that is two! TWO yarn stores! ah ha ha ha!#the issue here being that I have Strong opinions about what davie and alan breck look like that does not agree with what yarn stores have#SIGH. what if I dyed my own yarn <- guy who is getting a little desperate#if I lightly overdyed the yarn I used for alison with alcohol ink I could Maybe get a red-toned almost-black?#altho' dunno what I'd do about davie. the closest thing I've found is a little too mushroom and evening it out would need red and yellow#also I don't really think in dye-useful color theory at all... I learned to be good as a digital artist so now I think in cmyk....
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I just got asked out on a date...
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so transgender i could cry
#went to my first drag show where my friend made their drag debut#and just like!!! i dont know i was so proud of them#and felt so honored to be with them and to see all the performers#and the queens and kings and not really eithers.. AH!#dancing and making art and then going to the bar to get something to drink i just felt like#wow…. im so lucky to be here right now.. what an honor to be alive with them.#in this room with the lights changing colors and the emcees saying the best stage names ive ever heard#what a beautiful beautiful lovely stupid wonderful thing to be alive in a room with other trans people. unbelievable!!!!#and it also kind of made me feel like. ack.. well…. maybe i could do that..#i do love to perform and. frankly. if i hadn’t been homeschooled almost certainly i would’ve been a theater kid.#and. i dunno i dunno i get so nervous but i think i could do it…..
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