#absolute gremlin behavior

[sunshinegat0r]

Where is THIS Zoro in OPLA?

[daily-rgg-posting]

I’m watching 4 and I loved this interaction

[leclercsbf]

tanti auguri, carlos!

[invidiaesin]

"You think 175 is hard to keep track of? Try keeping track after 8000 years"

"Are you saying you're that old?" He doesn't remember Father making anything... pink? Not even really human looking or anything like a chimera. Reminded him a little bit of that floss candy he's seen at fairs in Central.

"Who says geezers don't have a good memory?"

[nyanzaya]

My blog is a relic and I miss my gremlins very much

[phantoms-world-and-more]

Someone actually manages to get the answer as to WHY he was like that

He told them that is creepy godfarther/uncle was trying to fuck his mother, murder his farter and make him his business currupt son

Danny talked about how this "fruitloop" would forceful drag him to galas, photoshoots, interviews and after all the drama of adopting all those things have become a PTSD trigger

Everyone feels sorry and after that he's no longer pestered by the press

(Yes all his siblings are jelous and proud)

Until said creepy godfarther/uncle tries to get custody over danny, all bruce wayne did was relese the information to the press

Now there are hundrers of gothem press breaking down his door for making them deal with the feral racoon he traumatised

dp x dc prompt #54

When Danny was first given the opportunity to make a public persona when he came to live in Gotham, he was a little bit concerned. How was he supposed to come up with an entire elaborate character to act as all the time. Then he remembered the time that Vlad called him a rabid badger when he got especially angry and a genius idea came into existence.

When the press gathered around to interview and write about the newest Wayne adoption, they thought they had seen it all already. The last new child had tried to skewer one of the unsuspecting interns after all. When the teenager didn’t even get all the way out of the car before punching someone standing too close and snarling at him, several considered filing their resignation letters on the spot. The pay wasn’t worth this.

[pedgito]

𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘 𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓 | dbf!Joel Miller x reader

↝ other fics | requests? | ao3 | update blog | fic rec | ko-fi

summary | you're stranded, you need help—of course, Joel Miller is your savior.

content warning | listen. i wrote this in 3 hours, idk what to say. i had a thot and it went from there. its completely p w/o p, dbf!joel, age gap, moodboard is for aesthetic and reader is mostly not described aside from hair long enough to be put up, unhinged popsicle eating, eye-fucking, public-ish unprotected p in v car sex. listen i'm on my period rn don't look at me and thank you for my love, my twin, @chaotic-mystery for constantly supporting my gremlin behavior

word count — 3.2k

Out of all the people you had the chance of running into—of course it was Joel.

The chances were slim, but not impossible. You knew his work schedule well enough, similar to that of your fathers. He worked early mornings into the late evening, taking his commute home just as the sun was starting to set.

You gripped the gas can in one hand as you made your way down the side road, the other hand placed over your eyes like a visor to block the sun away. You didn’t even have a cell signal out here, so the walk seemed fruitless.

But, you had to find a gas station. 

You thought you could make it home, which was clearly poor judgment, and the hair falling from the haphazardly tied knot on top of your head was sticking to your neck, eyes squinting as the truck pulled up next to you.

“Now, darlin’—the hell are you doin’ out here in the middle of nowhere?” Joel asks, the blast of AC hitting you in the face as he rolls down the window, arm leaned over the console as he looked you over. 

It was clear you’ve been out here longer than you should and Joel doesn’t even take a second to hesitate before he’s popping the handle on the passenger door and inviting you inside the cooler cabin of his truck.

“Where are you comin’ from?” He asks, shifting the truck into drive before he rests his palm over the gear shift.

“A friend, I thought I had enough gas to make it home but,” You shrug, waving vaguely at your car parked on the side of the road as he drives by.

What took a fifteen minute walk to where Joel had picked you up was only a minute or so drive back. Joel looks at you wearily and turns up the AC, blasting the stray hairs away from your face but the immediate burst of cold feels like absolute heaven.

“Grab a water out of my cooler, sweetheart,” He gestures with a thumb over his shoulder and you scramble, leaning over the center console with your ass popped up in the air.

Joel assumed it had to have been a pool party, the skirt covering your bottom half doing nothing to hide the thin, strappy bikini bottoms you wore underneath. 

Joel doesn’t mean to stare, but he’s worried that you might hurt yourself, his hand reaching out to wrap around your calf in an effort to keep you steady.

A subtle smirk plays at the corner of your mouth as you reach for the water inside the cooler and pop your head back up, your ass grazing his hand on the way down as you twist back into your seat.

Little touches were never a big thing with you two, normal and constant and nothing unusual.

A hand on your shoulder at family cookouts, his hands engulfing yours as he popped open the cap on your beer, a squeeze of his hand at the back of your neck when he hugged you after a month or two of not seeing you around your father’s house due to college or work, whatever was keeping you so busy. He didn’t try to pry, but you’ve been around less and less with each passing summer—so this unsuspecting time with you, he didn’t mind. It was nice.

Really nice.

You twist at the cap and take a drink of the water, so thirsty that it starts to drip out of your mouth, a small droplet down your chin, reaching your chest and down the center of your breasts.

“It ain’t goin’ nowhere,” Joel jokes, squinting his eyes as he hides the growing grin on his face with his usual frown.

“Sorry, being out in that heat like that…” You take a breath, recalling the bottle and putting it in the drink holder, “I just feel so stupid for thinking I could make it.“

When the street lights come into view, you know you're closer to actual civilization. And, just as Joel takes a right on the next intersection you stop at, there it was.

“It happens,” Joel comforts, “but you were lucky I was drivin’ home—can’t even think about what could have happened if I didn’t pass by.”

Joel pulls into the gas station and turns off the ignition.

“Well,” You flash a bright smile, squeezing at his shoulder—he’s got on a dark shirt plastered with the logo of the construction company he worked for, faded and slightly damp from his own sweat, “you did and I’m thankful for it, Joel.”

“Hand it over,” Joel motions toward the gas can, “I’ll fill ‘er up for you.”

“Joel, you don’t have to—“

Joel tilts his head toward the gas can at your feet, eyebrows raised and hand held out expectantly.

“Just hand it over.”

You sigh softly and relent, reaching between your legs to grab the plastic jug, knowing of the eyes that drag down your spine from the open back of your top, tied just as your neck and the side of your breasts spilling out of your swim top.

Joel knows a snag, just a simple hook of his fingers would send them spilling out into the cool air, nipples perked up under the mesh fabric of your top and—

“Joel.”

Joel’s eyes pull up suddenly, his face flushed but he’s lucked out by the redness of hot, summer heat on his face.. He clears his throat and grabs the gas can.

“Be right back,” He tells you, “stay put, alright?”

“And where would I go?” You retort playful, “I’m sure you’d find me again anyways.”

Joel chuckles to himself with a shake of his head as he departs into the store, handing a ten to the clerk before he takes a quick glance back at you, fanning yourself with your hand and chugging down another swig of water.

“Actually,” Joel pauses for a moment, holding a finger up as he lingers down the aisle toward the freezer and grabs out two popsicles, hoping that would quell some of the heat, even if for a moment—plus, he knew you had quite the sweet tooth, “there, just put whatever’s left on the pump and I’ll use that to fill it up.”

The clerk nods and scans the items, handing Joel off the receipt and he’s half jogging back toward his truck—quick to toss you the keys and the two popsicle’s he’d bought.

“What is this?” You ask cheerfully, eyes lighting up as they plopped into your lap.

Joel kept the driver's side open as he filled up the gas can, watching as you peeled eagerly at the popsicle, the red dye immediately dripping down your fingers as you pulled away the plastic.

“Just throw it on the floorboard—I’ll clean it up later,” Joel notes as you look around, placing the lid back on the gas can before climbing back into the truck, “you mind openin’ mine?”

You place the cherry flavored popsicle between your lips with an eagerness that forces Joel to look away, the sound of you peeling away plastic in his ear as he pulls out of the gas station and makes his way back toward your car.

“Thank you, baby,” He says casually—not all that odd either, he’s got a million nicknames for you, some trickier to let slip around others but there was an unspoken agreement. You never minded, never cared.

He was only ever Joel to you and he didn’t mind that either. 

“Of course,” You smile, before dragging your tongue along the bottom of the popsicle and back up, sinking it back between your lips.

Joel just bites at it, not one to savor things very often.

You giggle and roll your eyes, the popsicle tip just as the edge of your lips before Joel is looking over at you curiously, ignoring the red stain of popsicle on your tongue as it peeks out.

“What?”

“Just—you’re not even trying to enjoy it, Joel.”

“It’s meant to be eaten, right?”

“It’s hot—it’s a cold treat, you’re supposed to make it last a little. Come on,” You hold the popsicle out for demonstration before licking up the side, sinking your lips back down in a show that was more for yourself, knowing how he constantly looked at you—if Joel chokes on the bite of flavored ice in his mouth you don’t see it.

It wasn’t a secret, how he looked at you. It’s been a few years since you left for college and teetering that line, nearing your mid-twenties now it seemed like it had only gotten more and more obvious. Joel’s never made his own advances aside from the one time your drunken state made you a little too confident, sliding between his legs at one of your family parties late at night, pressing a kiss right against his lips that ended far too quickly. 

He did kiss you back though, you do remember that.

“Alright, alright,” Joel waves his hand at you nonchalantly, “you can cut that out.”

You raise an eyebrow, feeling the sticky sweet juice slip down your fingers as the popsicle starts to melt, nearly finished as Joel had already downed his own.

“I’m just eating the popsicle,” You brush him off, “that you bought me—“

“You know what I’m talkin’ about, sweetheart.”

You do, but that half second of lingering pause makes Joel worry he has read the situation completely wrong.

“What? Do you not like it?” You tease him, “Doesn’t it turn you on, Joel?”

You finish up the last bit before tucking the stick into the plastic and back on the ground, suddenly realizing the red dye had stained the front of your top, causing a frown to form on your face as you rubbed at the material.

“Shit,” You curse, ignoring the heated look on Joel’s face at your words, practically oblivious with the sudden distraction. You pull at the tie on the back of your top and bunch up the fabric as you stuff it between your lap, meeting Joel’s half-dumbstruck look as he tries to keep his eyes on the road but also can’t draw his eyes away from you, “what—I got it all over my shirt?”

Joel pulls to the side of the road in an instant, forcing the truck into park, “What are you playin’ at?”

You look at him with confusion, narrowing your eyes.

“What? Why did you pull over?”

“What are the chances of me findin’ you out here? On this road?” He raises his eyebrows expectantly, “Hm?”

You feign innocence for a few seconds before you cave, smiling with a devilish glint, resting your chin in your hand as you lean against the center console, your bikini top doing nothing to cover the plump of your breasts as the press against the fabric.

“Well, I mean—I figured they were pretty likely but—“

“Is your car even out of gas?”

You chew at your bottom lip thoughtfully, eyes tilting upwards in thought—truth…lie. 

Joel seemed set on getting the truth. So, you give it to him.

“No, but I had you going, didn’t I?”

Joel is silent for too long and you raise your eyebrows in question before Joel reaches forward, tugging at the lever under his seat to send him scooting back.

“Come here,” It’s simple. An instruction. 

But the look on his face—the intimidation shakes you to your core.

“Now, don’t back off,” Joel challenges, “it’s what you wanted, right?”

“As if you don’t want it either,” You counter, “you’ve been eye-fucking me since I got in your truck.”

Joel doesn’t even deny it, only waits. A simple nod of his head in a gesture for you to climb over and into his lap.

So, you do.

His hands immediately find your thighs and push up the denim skirt, your own hands resting at your sides as you scoot until your cunt is pressed up against the hard line of his zipper, the denim of his jeans so sensitive against your bare skin, feeling like all your senses were dialed up.

“We do this,” Joel starts, “there’s no going back. So, I need you to think if you really want this or—“

You surge forward, forcing the back of his head into the headrest as you swallow his words in a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss, tongues clashing with the taste of sugary sweetness.

“Gotta be quick,” Joel tells you, his words lost on deaf ears as your hands drag down his front, inhaling the faint scent of his cologne, the ironic freshness despite having worked in the heat all day, “can I fuck you, baby? S’that too much to ask?”

You shake your head, peppering soft kisses against his lips, along his jaw, feeling his fingers reach for each tie at your hips and pull, his hand immediately sliding over your cunt, cupping you with the warmth of his palm.

“Get it out, baby—got my hands a little busy right now.”

The heat in his words makes your pussy clench, but your hands move even faster, dragging over the front of his jeans and pulling at the zipper swiftly and Joel lifts his hips enough to get them down his thighs but that was it, hissing at the instant your hand closes around his cock.

“You got a problem with me fuckin’ you like this?” Joel asks, a true gentleman, but you roll your eyes. “Don’t even know why I asked—you’ve been beggin’ for it.”

You tilt your head, smiling at him playfully before you lick at your fingers and taste the remaining sticky sugar before pressing them along the center of your cunt, mixed with the already growing slick—Joel nudges at your entrance as you watch, the tip of his cock notched against your hole and your pussy quivers with the anticipation as he drags his cock up, down, up, before sliding in all at once.

It’s slow, but intense. Your eyes close, brow drawing together as he pulls you further and further down his cock.

“Open,” He breathes out, “open your eyes and look at how you’re takin’ me, baby.”

You blink quickly, grabbing onto his bicep for purchase as you look down, his hands squeezing at the tops of your thighs as he admired, watching the way his cock has you on the edge of near tears—a mix of overwhelming emotion and intense sensation.

Joel pulls at your top gently and it falls without much struggle, he bunches the material up and tosses it aside with your bottoms, massaging the swell of your tits under his palms as you rock your hips slowly, hearing the soft grunt behind his closed lips as you lean into his touch.

Flicking his thumb over your nipples, he admires the way the nubs hardered, like he’d imagine earlier—he tries not to dwell on how you both got here, like it wasn’t years of built up tension finally crumbling underneath you both.

“Don’t be shy,” He tells you, “take whatever you need, baby.”

As does he, leaning forward to press his lips against your breast, tongue lapping over the pert nipple before he sucks it into his mouth, drawing a soft sigh out of you.

You lift your hips, in time with the hand of his own that drops to your side to quicken your pace, “Wanna take my time with you but we can’t,” Joel admits, “gotta get home.”

You nod, knowing he had his own responsibilities as a father—you don’t argue, placing your hands against the headrest and raising your hips nearly off of his cock before sinking back down quickly, keeping that pace for as long as your body will allow, shared breaths into each others mouth as he hands travel from your tits to your face, the largeness of his palms engulfing your face as he brings his lips to your mouth again, again, soft whispers of words you know he doesn’t mean. Promises you know are fleeting and easy to break. 

You couldn’t be with him, but you would take whatever this is.

“Just like that, baby,” He murmurs, grunting harshly into your ear as you tuck your head into his neck, his hand buried into the hair at the back of your head as you sink down onto his cock desperately, crying out into the side of his throat as he snaps his hips roughly, hitting so deep inside of you it makes you clench, biting down gently on his skin, “I feel it, I felt it.”

You snake your hand between your legs, finding your clit quickly and rubbing over the swollen nub, and Joel can tell by the neediness in your tone, moans broken into his skin as he fucks into you, haphazardly scanning the road for any passing cars—but he knew this place was always deserted, a shitty road that no one ever took.

Not even you, but today—it wasn’t a coincidence. 

“That’s right, baby,” Joel sighs, head thrown back as he groaned out, “gon’ let me use this pussy, yeah?”

You nod instinctively, willing to agree with whatever Joel asked.

“Wanna fill her up,” Joel admits, forcing you to lift your head and look at him, head tilted down slightly to meet your eyes, “that alright, darlin’?”

You nod again, but coherent this time. 

He loosens the reins completely by then, practically hauling you over his shoulder as he pounds into you, encourage the hand on your clit as he squeezes a handful of your ass under his palm, marking the skin with a few firm slaps that has you moaning out loudly into the sacred space of the truck.

“Joel, please—“ You gasp, “I’m gonna—right there,”

“I know, baby. I know.” He says softly, but the strain in his voice is obvious, groaning through clenched teeth as your orgasm crests, warmth spreading as you gush over his cock, the momentary bliss of sensation making your forget where you were, suddenly wishing that this had been a little less impulsive, wondering how Joel would treat you within the walls of his bedroom, buried in the sheets of his bed.

When Joel comes, it’s intense. His hands squeezing at your waist hard, his hips jerking out of rhythm as he stills you, coming inside of you with a deep groan, pulling you in for a frenzied kiss, laughing at how your faces uncoordinatedly press together, your nose smushed against his own and he kisses at the tip of your own as you pull away, his hair messier than when you started from your insistent grabbing and pulling during the heat of your orgasm.

He looked a complete mess, actually.

“You okay?” He asks after a long pause, his hand rubbing at your back, cock still buried inside you on the side of an empty road. 

“Mhm,” You nod drearily.

“Baby, you gotta drive home now.” He tells you and you know—it doesn’t make it any easier, though. “Don’t pull this shit again, alright?”

If he’d see it any other way you would have flinched, but it was soft and comforting—not a warning.

“You need somethin’, you come knockin’ on my door.”

And you know he means it.

“Okay, I will.”

“Swear,” That was an order, “I need to hear it.”

“I swear.” You reply quietly.

Joel doesn’t push you away, though.

If anything, he savors the few moments he has in this dreamy afterglow, a taste of what could be—but you both know never will. 

divider creds: @/cafekitsune

[crapbirdphotography]

Submission Rules

This blog is dedicated to bringing you the finest in absolute garbage photography of birds.

If you'd like to submit a photo, we're accepting submissions! Just a few guidelines:

BIRDS ONLY. This means photos must contain some portion of a living bird, or the location where a bird just was before the camera clicked, or be something you are sure WAS a bird before you took the photo and/or investigated more closely. Other animals not accepted.

You may only submit photos YOU PERSONALLY TOOK, or that you were given permission to submit by someone you know. We're interested in YOUR garbage, not someone else's.

Photos must be CRAP. The worse the better. We are posting GARBAGE for the GREMLINS tonight, not showcasing good photos of birds. If your photo is not crap, it may not get published.

Birds must not be ill, injured, dead, or otherwise in unnatural distress. Wild birds performing natural behaviors (such as fighting or hunting non-bird animals) will be allowed on a case-by-case basis.

Wild birds are preferred, captive birds are acceptable.

Please limit submissions to 1-2 photos per post. This makes it easier for people to see the beautiful crap you've produced.

Submit a photo!

Additionally, we will be running on submissions ONLY. If you make a post on your own blog with your own photo and want to submit it by pinging us, we will likely reblog it, but we're not here to make fun of anyone or make anyone feel bad so we won't be seeking posts.

This means please DO NOT ping us on other people's posts unless you're telling them about us. We also don't want you making anyone feel bad on our behalf.

Be kind, have fun!

[meanbossart]

There’s something enthralling about the absolute adoration and absolute gremlin behavior between Astarion and DU Drow.

Like yeah, DU Drow can’t help but imagine what Astarion’s insides feel like in the least mutually enjoyable way possible, but he wouldn’t be able to see Astarion’s smile or hear his laugh anymore and Drow loves those more than the feeling of trembling flesh between his fingers.

But also the vain idiot doesn’t take off his rings before sex and has possibly lost them in orifices untouched by the sun.

Listen, he just forgets whilst in the throes of passion. He would happily fish them out if Astarion wasn't so scared of his wrist circumference or whatever🙄

[gallusrostromegalus]

I haven't seen any dog stories in a while. How are Charleston and The Hanukkah Goblin doing?

Dog updates!

The first one is a little sad, but also how life should go. Arwen is 14 now and while she's still moving, eating, pooping and generally enjoying life, she also has canine dementia and sundown syndrome where she gets extremely nervous and her dementia gets worse after dark. She'll be with us for a while yet, but it's something we have to manage now.

One person who is very much helping her manage is Herschel. My parents are traveling a lot while they still have the knees for it so I spend a lot of time up at their house, and Charleston and Herschel come up too. Being a Corgi, Herschel likes to manage things, and Arwen would like someone to manage things for her so he's become her self-appointed guide dog.

When I call the dogs for food or outside, he goes and finds her deaf ass and herds her to the location. Normally she doesn't go outside after dark but when the boys are there she's willing to wait for Charlie to chase away anything that might be lurking out there, and then follow Herschel's ass around the yard at night.

Very literally.

She's also got cataracts forming and I think his bright white backside is easy for her to see in the dark, so she follows it around.

During daytime walks she sees well enough but neither she nor Charlie are fans of strange off-leash dogs running up to them (a regrettably common problem out here. I don't care if your dog is friendly MINE ARE NOT!), so both of them prefer to walk half a pace behind Herschel so his more socially adept and knife-filled face is out front to intercept any unwanted solicitors. This does tend to give people the opposite impression though- because he is so much shorter, Herschel gives the impression of a tiny, charming mafioso flanked by his two large and surly bodyguards.

Like, they absolutely would kill a bear for him.

But Charlie and Arwen would also try to kill a bear on general principle.

At night, when Arwen barks at shadows, Herschel runs up and stand between her and the alleged menace, and does his best to look large and intimidating and for as silly as he looks, he does have a very good growl. After a moment, when the alleged bear or congressman or other horror fails to appear, he will stick his nose into the offending shadow, and finding nothing, be satisfied that their joint effort has successfully chased the problem off, and report back to her. This, more than anything else, seems to alleviate Arwen 's fears.

I guess we all just need someone to take us seriously when we're frightened.

Charleston, meanwhile, has gotten into giving safari tours of the front range's small vertebrates.

After eight years of managing his exceptionally high prey drive, something clicked earlier this summer and instead of immediately lunging his whole face at any approximately bite-sized animal in an attempt to expedite it's journey into his stomach, Charlie has started *pointing* at things until I come look at them and tell him he's a good boy. This started with a mole, something he'd never seen before and that moves above ground in a strange way, so he wasn't sure about eating it, so he only alerted at it. "GOOD BOY!" I shouted, giving him all the cuddles. "GOOD SPOT! GOOD JOB NOT EATING IT!"

It's important to reward behavior you want to see.

Since then, he's been trying out pointing at small creatures in the grass and then making very pointed eye contact with me until I come look at them. This is a little tricky when walking both dogs because Herschel is still very much in his "inhale wildlife" phase, but usually I can lock the little gremlin's leash and go look at whatever Charlie has cornered while Herschel attempts to develop telekinesis to will the critter into his mouth.

So far, Charleston has found: a baby rabbit, several baby rabbits in a cluster, an adult rabbit with Jackalope virus, several voles, several moles, a fledgling owl, only the two mice, several mouse-sized grasshoppers and cicada, someone's pet rat (the person was searching within earshot and 'Socks' was collected forthwith), a beanie baby that had me fooled for a hit minute too, a marmot which I didn't know lived down here, a groundhog which I didn't know lived up here, a mink, so many toads, a wild turkey chick, so many more garter snakes and last night, an aquatic shrew.

I don't know if there's an Audubon Society for small things that scuttle around in the undergrowth, but I am inclined to join solely to get Charleston recognition for his service in surveying them.

[amelee23]

Stray kids and their sneaky love antics | Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Stray kids members X reader (reader is implied to have periods in Felix's part but other than that no pronouns are used)

Genre: Fluff, comedy, bullet point

Warnings: sNeAkY bois, pranking and blaming it on ghosts, lino opens your bags without permission, overprotective behavior (??), they're all playing dumb, Jeongin is one feisty boy, periods, food (sweets) , lots of TEASING

Length: 2k total

A/N: It's all just for fun I swear 😂 I couldn't sleep last night so I came up with this lmao

Chan who always puts spare change in your jacket pockets

Maybe he noticed how you always seem to freeze on the spot or apologize awkwardly every time cashiers ask you if you have any change

Or maybe this is just his way of giving you money in a way you don't notice so you won't scold him for spoiling you (again)

You don't notice it at first, but you do breathe a sigh of relief when you actually do have some coins on your next purchase

And the next one...

And the next one after that...

Okay hold up, what the-

Is your jacket pocket an endless well of fortune??? You're taking out coins but they keep coming back???

Nah just joking of course you realized it was Chan

Especially since one day you caught him, like a gremlin in the dark, hovering around your jacket in the hallway

"Whatcha doing, boo?"

He jumps and tries to splutter some excuse to you but you're not impressed

"Ah, I wanted to ask you, do you have some spare change by any chance?" You tease him and he bursts out laughing and turns beet red

"You caught me!" He exclaims, still laughing as you drag him out of the dark to cuddle with you

"You sneaky coin goblin" you tease him further and ruffle his hair

────────── · · · · ✦

Lee know who always puts packets of sweet biscuits in your purse/ backpack

It's a habit for him, he's a caretaker - packets of snacks for all of his kittens (you included)

You told him you liked those packets of biscuits you bought from the supermarket last time

And you told him you get hungry often when you're not home

1+1=2

Lino buys biscuits. Lino puts said biscuits in your bag. And then he acts like nothing happened, of course

So when you come home one day, and look inside your bag and go "oh, how'd this get here?" he shrugs his shoulders.

"Aren't they yours?" And you're like sir what

"No? Maybe someone put them in my bag by mistake?"

"No no I'm pretty sure they're yours." He answers and you're like. Oh. I see how it is.

"And you had absolutely nothing do to with them, right?" You tease, and he purses his lips and shakes his head no

"Well then if they're mine, let's eat them!" You explain, and Lino snatches them out of your hand lmao

"No, I'm pretty sure they were there so you can eat them when you get hungry outside."

"Wow it's so weird you know that considering you had nothing to do with them!" Oh he's trying so hard to keep a straight face but he's failing

So you put them back in your bag and actually keep them as an emergency snack. And then send lino a pic with the empty foil saying "thank you <3" and he literally replies with "thank the ghosts not me. I told you I had nothing to do with it."

The ghosts continued to put biscuits in your bag

────────── · · · · ✦

Changbin who always carries around a fanny pack with a tiny bottle of water inside in case you get thirsty outside

Changbin often showcases his care for others by looking after their health

Sometimes he can be a little irritating and pushy, always telling you to exercise and eat this and that and what not

You came to a compromise eventually, you're not gonna work out with him but you're gonna go out often and go on many walks

After all it's quality time, right?

But no no the mans come prepared

Always. Wether it's an intended walk for exercise or a walk for romantic vibes or you're going to the mall, doesn't matter

He always has that teeny tiny water bottle with him just so he can go like "you thirsty? I gotcha babe" lmao

Because as Changbin always says, "soda doesn't help with your thirst, only water does" 🙄

He's no fun sometimes but you still love his overbearing ass <3

────────── · · · · ✦

Hyunjin who "accidentally" gets paint on the clothes of his you like sleeping in so that you could keep them

They say there's two stages to falling in love with a man

First, you fall in love with him.

Second, you fall in love with his clothes

And oh boy that hoodie of his was looking mighty fine that evening

And the evening after

Hyunjin could swear you growl louder than Kkami if he tries to take his clothes back

Well then oOps. He mighty have accidentally painted wearing that hoodie and might have accidentally stained it with paint (weird that the stain looked like it was made with a brush, huh.)

You were like, "Oh no! We can wash it??" And he was like this paint is really hard to get out of the material, so you just HAD to keep it as your sleeping hoodie now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But then it just so happened you also caught a crush on a shirt of his one day

How'd that one also end up stained with paint???

A whole ass mystery

But oop looks like that shirt can't be worn outside anymore either, what a shame.

Hyunjin smiles to himself as he sees the collection of his clothes that are purely reserved for you, sitting on the shelf he's dedicated to you.

They're just clothes after all. Objects. He doesn't care about them, he can replace them. But you're everything to him

────────── · · · · ✦

Han who always comes up with new nicknames and endearment terms, each one sweeter than the other

You can't lie. At first it was kinda cringe

The way he was all like "ah, my sweetie honey poo, my shiny golden angel, the first ray of sunshine of spring warming up my heart"

Ok, dork lmao

But they always made you laugh

And he loved seeing you happy

Some days he wouldn't do it and you'd instantly notice

It became a necessity, okay? To hear what ridiculous, creative mishmash of words he could throw your way

So you'd go outta your way to ask him, "so what am I to you today?"

And Jisung's brain is buffering  "Uh, my lover?"

"Just your lover? What happened to being as soft and sweet as creme brulee?" He said that once. Yep.

And his eyes light up! He scoots closer and picks up your hand to kiss it

"You're the reflection of everything I hoped I could deserve in this world. My crystal ball of good fortune"

How does he keep coming up with these, nobody will ever know

But your goofy lyrical genius will do anything for you

────────── · · · · ✦

Felix who knows your menstrual cycle by heart and always carries pads with him

It's not that Felix paid extra attention to when you were talking about your period. He just ALWAYS paid attention to what you said

He's a man of detail

So he was listening to you, always offering to help you out with whatever you were craving or needing, and eventually he began to note down your cycle in his calendar and that somehow lead to preparing in advance every month

With snacks, asking you if pms is bothering you, if you're irritated, hungry etc

And of course he'd buy you pads for the house that's just a granted

But on top of that he also had an extra pack at his place from which he'd take one or two pads and put them inside his backpack for emergencies

He'd advise you to check if you can take days off in case the pain is too bad

And he won't push you to go out AT ALL

It's like he had two modes: boyfriend mode and older sister mode 😂

All in all he's not afraid to put in effort and he's a literal angel I'm telling you

────────── · · · · ✦

Seungmin who keeps putting candy in the pockets of your pajama pants

This one started out as a prank

He had no other choice but to get a couple of candy because the shop he bought from had no change to give him

And he won't just give you the candy, duuh

You had a habit of throwing your pajama pants on the back of a chair

His eyes landed of them and the plan locked in his head

He literally sat there and watched you put on the pants clueless. And then he URGED YOU to come to bed exasperatedly

But you were uncomfortable??? Something was poking your leg??

You take out the candy and squint at it in the dark

"What is this doing here?"

"I know right, why do you have candy in your pajamas, you weirdo."

Oh THE GLARE you gave him

Seungmin had an epiphany that night. That messing with you is fun. Oh boy.

He waited before doing it again, of course. He had to keep you on your toes

But this time you caught on the moment you pulled up the pants up your leg

"Kim Seungmin!" You exclaimed while laughing and he feigned innocence yet again. You still haven't eaten the candy from last time, so with a bunch of candy in your hand, you dropped them on the bed and began unwrapping one as you guys watched Netflix

"If you keep buying them, let's at least eat them, you fiend."

"Ew I don't want your gross pant candy." But he ate it after you thew a pillow in his face

But one time he put an entire candy cane in there and it was just jutting out of your pocket like a Christmas stocking and you literally broke into a laughter fit for 15 minutes straight

────────── · · · · ✦

Jeongin who will pick a fight with any person who interrupts you while you're speaking

Jeongin began to get angry on your behalf ever since you started dating

He's usually so calm, so chill

But suddenly!! if someone messes with his baby say goodbye calmness

That one guy who closed a door in your face? Literally scolded a stranger for closing a door in someone's face like that

God forbid someone pushes you on the street

He will literally sit there and teach people manners lmao

But if there's one thing about manners he hates, it's being interrupted while speaking

But if YOU get interrupted while you're speaking?

W a r

"Do you need to clean your ears? Someone was speaking."

Literally how DARE THEY interrupt his sweet angel

You could literally be talking to him about pigeons and he'd still think it's the most important thing he's ever heard

The amount of times he's sassily shushed people so you'd be able to finish one goddamn sentence

He's so disappointed in society, can you tell?

────────── · · · · ✦

If you like what you see, consider donating so I can keep writing!

[sillygoofyqueer]

If you want to lean in on Shen Yuan’s obliviousness, perhaps he doesn’t realize Bing-ge is courting him, until Bing-ge successfully nabs him and declares it so.

(Bing-ge does do the crow courting behavior you mentioned first, but while secret transmigrator Shen Yuan accepts and reciprocates the gestures he doesn’t actually get it).

It’s not until Bing-ge pulls out a scroll listing all the ‘accepted’ betrothal gifts (aka, every item Shen Yuan stole), and the return gifts (aka everything Shen Yuan give him) that what’s going on suddenly occurs to Shen Yuan. (Look up Guo Da Li and Hui Li ceremonies).

Shen Yuan thinks Bing-ge is blackmailing him into the marriage, by making the thefts seem like gifts, but it’s wholly unnecessary as who could say no to Binghe?

For other thoughts I had:

A) Consider Shen Yuan having a “fan” made out of his family’s shed crow feathers, that he hides behind.

B) Perhaps Bing-ge finds out Shen Yuan is only half demon when he is able to break out of a demon trapping array with spiritual energy. (A trick Binghe has never seen anyone else pull off before).

C) In Airplane’s original draft, Shen Yuan’s character was meant to be a sort of foil to Binghe. He’s another half demon but with far less power (he’s no heavenly demon, and his spiritual cultivation potential is only good, not genius level) and a more stable upbringing.

Maybe Shen Yuan’s crow family even settled in the human realm because of a beef with some demon lord too, making the human realm more accepting (another inverse of Bing-ge who was rejected by the human realm for his heritage).

HAHA, sorry, I love the idea that Bing-ge has kept this whole ass account of just...every little thing that has ever been stolen or given by Shen Yuan, and I can feel the feral excitement radiating off him when he's like, "and I've got RECIEPTS that we've been courting each other!!" He's so so smug, and Shen Yuan is just in that bird-like shock where they just sit there and stare as if he's bluescreened. He's actually offended that Bing-ge thinks he needs to be blackmailed into marriage because "anyone would be lucky to marry him" A) OH MY GOD, SHEN YUAN WITH A HOMEMADE FAN is an adorable idea. I haven't figured out what his robes look like, but it'd be so cute if like, the first time he's trapped, he begrudgingly turns to half-human form and whips out this gorgeous fan (Bing-ge's jealous because who gave the demon this fan and why hadn't HE given it to him??). Despite being what some would call a half-feral demon (he isn't), he actually radiates class thank you very much due to his human roots from before his transmigration (he was an internet gremlin, but I like to think he had a wealthy family that taught him that etiquette he needed for formal situations). B) He is undeniably surprised when Shen Yuan eventually breaks through the array and is like "fun hang out, thanks for not killing me!" and just disappears with whatever he was trying to steal. Bing-ge's like "oh my gawd, just like me fr" and needs to find out everything ever possible about him or he's going to lose his mind. C) Oh my god, I'm madly in love with foils, I love that idea. They're similar in so many ways and yet there are certain differences between them that wildly change who they are as people. From a reader's perspective, Shen Yuan understands this. From the perspective of a character? It's absolutely insane that he's comparing himself to the Luo Bing-ge like the emperor could ever be compared to this crow demon. (It also brings me to the question, what on earth is Airplane doing in this AU, if he's there at all?). The idea of the crow family settling in with humans to escape from a demon lord is sooo good because then, when Shen Yuan is being courted by this emperor, it's hard for them not to feel suspicious of it all!!! {part four! Part one, part two, part three, part five, part six, part seven!!}

[shytastemakerthing]

Ooooo I think I’ve noticed this being being a thing across some other fics & HCs and stuff, but would you be willing to do headcanons for Vil with a yuu (where he somehow found out about their feelings) who wouldn’t confess to him about their feelings & tried to get over him because they were worried he’d brush them off as typical paparazzi/fan behavior because he’s so used to it?

Hello and thank you so much for your request! I am sorry that this took so long to get out, school and work have been rather crazy right now XD, I hope you enjoy!

Tw: None

A/N: Reader is stated to be Yuu

It was safe to say that you were not the first person to ever have a crush on the Vil Schoenheit, but you were certainly one who was in his presence more than some of the others

It was only a matter of time before such feelings would develop, especially with how often you two crossed paths, and how often you found yourself in his dorm

But there was absolutely no way that you could tell him such a fact

After all.... who were you compared to him?

He was a world famous celebrity, top-class model, a highly skilled actor

You were just.....nobody

A magic-less nobody from another world who didn't even belong to this world, especially the one that he lived in

If you told him, the chances were high that he would simply see this as some joke, or the typical fan behavior that he is quite used too, and there was no way that you would ruin the friendship that the both of you had just because of how you felt

Perhaps that is why you started to put a distance between the both of you

Last minute cancellations of study plans, doing your skincare at Ramshackle, stops at his club becoming less and less frequent, the works. Anything that would work a gradual decline in your time around him

In hopes that these feelings would soon diminish, no matter how it hurt

Oh, but a fool you were to not think that Vil would certainly take notice

At first, he didn't think much of it. He knew that Crowley, the worthless and lazy headmaster that he was, kept you rather busy. Not to mention that gremlin cat of yours followed by your first-year friends

But then more suspicions arose... as if you were actually actively avoiding him

Now he really didn't know how to feel about that

It wasn't until several key points were stated by Rook (stalker), when Vil began to piece it all together

Especially noticing how empty his heart had been feeling, how lonely, he felt when you weren't at his side

Why wouldn't you have just come to him about such feelings? How could he turn you down? Did you think so little of yourself? Perhaps you did, and he would certainly need to correct that

Which is probably what led him to the steps of Ramshackle, actually compiling each and every ounce of strength that he had to actually come to the rundown dorm to see you, standing straight and knocking on the door.... honestly hoping that he didn't sound as desperate as he felt

"You should never hide your feelings from me, Leibling. Especially if you do not know if they are reciprocated or not. Hm? Well, it would seem that this is my confession to you. Will you accept?"

Have a wonderful day/night!

[starport-rodeo]

my favorite dm posts are the ones with these two pictures specifically

followed by absolutely UNHINGED gremlin-armand behavior

like “daniel my beloved i require your assistance. ive accidentally released 14 weasels in the kitchen. don’t be so dramatic it was an experiment daniel!”

[astr0exe]

mk, so, what about TM Reader and older keegan/Ghost (you pick 🫶🏼) with R who’s just a little menace to society, keeping character on his toes. Bein a little brat, teasin n nipping at him any day of the week but at the end of the day loves being coddled n loved??? (love your work, honestly the best!! ignore if you don’t like this ml, have a great day/night 🩷 and either NSFW or SFW is fine)

Hey ml so glad you like the my work acc makes my day seeing the support my works have, tysm for this request it was so fun to write !! sorry its probably short m like so unwell rn:(( <3

Younger!reader who is an absolute menace ?? Like always getting into trouble, either with Keegan or with the police:(( you can’t blame him !! he's just a baby.

Older!Keegan who doesn’t know the full extent of your behavior, until he does a little info / background check on you just to make sure you aren’t absolutely psychotic. What he sees is rows and rows of warnings the police have given you, but when you speak to him, you’re so lovely (mainly cause you find him fit!) 

Older!Keegan who adores you and your gremlin-like behavior, not minding when you bite and assault his neck and body with your lips. Getting turned on more than anything by the feeling of your teeth grazing his neck to get his attention. His needy puppy who will do anything for attention, like literally anything. If that's flirting with Logan or pulling his hair randomly to get him to stop doing paperwork. He doesn’t care, you’ve made him soft, so when you bite his neck whilst he is doing some work he just moans and laughs, slowly scratching your head to show you have his attention.

Younger!Reader who melts under Keegans touch and attention, instantly relaxing and just wanting to crawl into his skin. You just calm down whenever he hugs you, whispering softly into your ear even after you have abused his neck, just sweeping you up in his hold and cuddling you till you have basically fallen asleep.

Older!Keegan who knows just how to calm you down, and uses it to his advantage. Kissing you lightly even after you bit him or pulled his hair, cuddling you softly. Doing all of this just to see you blush and whine laughing at the complete mood change just because of some affection. Keegan knows this is probably a mechanism from your past but he doesn’t really care, he just loves seeing your flustered face when he plants loud and obnoxious kisses to your face.

[waltz-malice]

Order and the Fool.

sunday x masked fool reader!

a/n: not yet posted on ao3, did this at 2am so forgive me for any mistakes! really love the concept of sunday and this absolute gremlin of a reader pestering him... this is just a test drabble really, i plan on making more actually interaction content with this reader soon!

word count: 806!

. . .

Sunday, simply put, was not a fan of you. You caused a ruckus wherever you went, you blatantly went against common sense itself, and worst of all? You seemed absolutely enthralled with him in particular.

Having a Masked Fool buzz around him on a daily basis was never a part of Sunday's plans, but he was forced to adjust accordingly ever since the two of you had met; he still loathed to recall that day, if he was being honest. He’d only gone to solve the mess you’d caused within the Golden Hour’s streets, perhaps intending to have you escorted away by the Bloodhound family officers nearby as well, but your behavior only became more erratic once he confronted you.

Sunday could still recall the way you’d paused when your eyes first met his, as if the world had just become solely focused on him in that moment — and then, that abhorrent grin that blossomed on your face like you’d just encountered the grand prize of all prizes… ugh, he should've put an end to your nonsense then and there!

Alas, Sunday had been too taken aback by the way you’d suddenly rushed over and took his hand in yours, the way you’d just blurted out your undying love like some SoulGlad drunkard, and even the warmth of your hands had seemed to seep through his gloves in that very moment. He should've shaken you off, called for the Bloodhounds, anything to deter this ridiculous illusion of yours, but all he could do was stand there, baffled.

And before he knew it, you’d given him one last wink and dashed off with the promise of meeting again, just before the Bloodhound family had even arrived on the scene. When it finally set in that you’d just confessed your devotion and then ran off like a hooligan…! Well, it was suffice to say Sunday nearly popped a blood vessel then and there.

Sunday would have several encounters with you following that day, but never on his own accord. No, no matter how hard he tried to hunt you down and have you detained, you proved to be much more elusive than your brazenness had suggested. It was beyond irritating to try and find any shred of info on you, only for you to show up within Dewlight Pavilion and leave a trail of destruction until he found you, or rather, you let yourself be found.

Sometimes you’d pretend to be one of his employees, dutifully working right under his nose until the two of you would make direct eye contact and Sunday would freeze, face going red as he realized he’d been made a fool out of once more. Others, you’d simply be waiting right in his office when he’d gotten back from a strenuous meeting, making yourself comfortable in his chair before he managed to chase you out.

The most peculiar of all these incidents, however, had happened late in the evening when Sunday had succumbed to his own exhaustion. He supposed the paperwork and stress of the Family's expectations had simply overwhelmed him, because before he knew it he’d fallen asleep slumped against his own desk; the next thing he knew, he was shifting against the back of his desk chair, pulling the blanket over him closer, and… wait, a blanket?

Sunday had woken with a start at the odd appearance of an object he never had within his office, and as he blearily recalled what he’d been doing prior, he became acutely aware of how orderly his desk looked compared to the frazzled disarray his overworked self had originally fallen asleep with it in. Confusion and a mounting panic began to stir inside of him as he quickly tossed the blanket aside and went to inspect his work to make sure it hadn't been tampered with, only to find it all completed?

And there, within a simple sticky note with a cute little heart drawn onto it, was his written answer: ‘Your favorite Fool. <3’

You had paid him a visit. Not only that, you’d somehow chosen not to take advantage of his sleeping state to play some immature prank or even something far more sinister, but instead, you’d stepped in where he had failed to do so…? For Ena’s sake, you hadn't even disturbed him in the process!

Sunday didn't know whether to be enraged, terrified, or heaven forbid, thankful for your timely interference. It confused him past the limits his mind had set for him — what had compelled you to do such a thing? You couldn't actually have meant that frivolous confession of yours, could you…?

With a groan muffled by the hand covering his face, Sunday could only fall back into his seat and try to process the impossibly possible. Dear Aeons, you were going to be the death of him…