sillygoofyqueer

[sillygoofyqueer]

TODAY TODAY, I've got thoughts cooking in my head for the first fully official, lore based post for the MDZS winged AU!! AKA the prize that @ezra1yn won by choosing to follow me at just the right moment and becoming the 6ooth one. Sorry it took me so long to get to it, I completely forgot everything ever because I'm such a mess. Okay so, I'm thinking this is a more forest vibe type thing, kind of like the cultivators - because they still cultivate - live in the forests, more mystical creatures that come to protect villages and towns in their territory (to varying levels of competency) than full humans that can become cultivators with practice. Not all forests are regarded as clan territory, and rogue cultivators wander through all forests because they don't give a shit! They're also more likely to chill amongst humans than other cultivators, who generally keep to themselves (whether because they don't want to be hunted or just out of general "we're better than humans), so they're naturally more friendly. After Wei Changze and Cangse-Sanren leave the Jiang forest to go help any who need it, they often find themselves in a more general forest - this is where rogue cultivators without any ties to other clans can chill out if they don't want to deal with clans. There are all sorts of friendly cultivators making nests in the trees that will be left when they leave for any others passing through and more than willing to help out fellow rogue cultivators. It's also where some former rogue cultivators stay if they don't want to live amongst humans during their final years.

After the couple has Wei Ying, they often leave him with these retired cultivators while they go answer calls to help villages and hunt monsters. When they die, he is raised by these same cultivators instead of being grabbed by Jiang Fengmian (who does come looking for him, but they say that they don't have him because the couple always talked about the disastrous marriage between Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan). He learns a sort of mismatch of cultivation, built up from main teachings of his carers and rogue cultivators who are passing through eager to share their techniques to the younger generation where they wouldn't have had a chance before. He also learns to adapt his flying in many different ways - his wings are naturally built for speed, and those with similar wings show him how to zoom around turns without losing speed or crashing into trees but with cultivators of different bird species teaching him how to fly, he learns endurance that his wings would usually not be suited for. Flying long distances with varying kinds of weight as though to fully prepare him for whatever situations he may find himself in (similar to Wild Robot if you get that reference - love that gorgeous film).

He truly is a child raised by a village, all sorts of knowledge handed to him from people on many different walks of life paired with his natural genius that they foster instead of suppress. Cultivators that are never seen in the same place twice even come around occasionally just to check in on this child and give things to him because he's just a charming little guy that's naturally trusting of the world after being raised by strangers. He's eight years old when a regularly returning cultivator with very personal (😏) ties to a blacksmith who specialises in spiritual swords tells him that he's getting a sword crafted specially for him, because "no cultivator should be left without a good old sword!" Wei Ying is super excited, so excited that he cannot think of a cool name. Yes, that's right Suibian will never escape its name, why would it want to. Before, where he would practice sword forms with a training sword that one cultivator stole happened to have from the clan they grew up in, he now has a sword that has been made with his strange mishmash of fighting methods in mind, as well as being lightweight so he can fight while flying. The child is ARMED.

He's never really been in contact with clans aside from seeing them travelling through villages that he's doing jobs in as he grows up, and he doesn't particularly care to - he's heard all of the horror stories about them all. However, when he finds what appears to be a Lan in an unmoving heap at the foot of his tree, he can't just ignore them. So, he takes stock of the situation, checking out the injured wing and the general fact that this Lan is not as elegant as he's been told, and lugs him up his tree into his nest den (thanking his elders for the foresight of flying with weights). He's learned a thing or two about treating injuries, and it's a pretty simple arrow to take out, so he goes about that while the Lan is still unconscious (he's heard they can be rather 'oooh we're so perfect and above you' so he wants to avoid that). Then he goes to tell the elders about the situation and they're like "lmao A-Ying's growing up, a MAN in his nest!!" And he's like "noooo stop I'll deal with this by myself Gods damn it" and that's how much they really help. Like yeah they make a portion of food for the Lan but they're leaving Wei Ying to deal with this by himself. He's a big boy now (sixteen) and he's so ready for this.

When he gets back, he clambers up the tree instead of flying because he's whimsical, and immediately gets a sword held to his throat for his troubles. It's like, a bit rude if he's being honest - he's removed an arrow and bandaged up this guy's wing, he's put him in his nest den and he's even brought him food! He complains about this, and it seems to startle the Lan enough for him to clamber up fully into his nest and deposit the bowl of what looks like rabbit food and tofu into the Lan's lap while he flops down into his nest and begins idly preening his wings. The Lan looks scandalised, but he finally eats with a raised brow shot his way. "I'm Wei Ying!" He finally says - he never got a courtesy name because he's not a member of the gentry, and also courtesty names are so clunky. The Lan evidently disagrees, introducing himself as "Lan Wangji" and ignoring his poking for a more personal name. Whatever. Now that he's not sprawled out on the floor with a blanket thrown over him, Wei Ying can decipher that he is a very attractive man. Like. Distractingly so, even with the blood and dirt splattered on his pure white wings and robes. When he asks about the white, he gets a glare in response. Oh yeah, this is going to be...so fun.

[sillygoofyqueer]

*Checks notes* Dog therapy AU? @eyalsfantasy's birthday present?? Man, I've forgotten everything about that one. NO WAIT. NO I HAVEN'T. DRUNKEN SHENANIGANS THE NIGHT BEFORE- Wei Ying wakes up in bed, entirely tangled up within his bedsheets and contemplates how he didn't throttle himself due to this sleeping position while staring up at his glow-in-the-dark stars. He has a raging headache and wishes he had never drank all of that booze as he groans and spins to the side - only to find a glass of water and pills waiting for him on the bedside table. They're placed onto a coaster that Wei Ying didn't even know he owned, with the general clutter of the nightstand carefully moved to the side but otherwise undisturbed as though the mysterious hangover fairy fluttered in during the night to ensure he'd be okay in the morning. Of course, the hangover fairy doesn't exist (it had always been A-Jie) and so it means someone has been in his room, because he would never care for his future self so much when drunk. After all, if he did care for his future self, he wouldn't get so drunk all the time. But, that is a thought to be pondered later, after he figures out what well-meaning burglar broke in and decided to help a pal out. So, he sighs, takes the medication and drinks the water because A-Jie would be proud of him for doing that, and drags himself out of bed.

He somehow got changed all by himself last night and, aside from a bruise on his side, he's virtually unharmed from the night. During drunken benders, he often wanders out of his apartment and goes around the town on a small walk - somehow not getting kidnapped in the process. Or, maybe he does? Who knows what he does when wasted. However, the point is, he's used to waking up with random bumps and scrapes from his escapades, so it's surprising that there's only one bruise instead of the many he usually gets. Maybe this burglar is actually a bro and made sure he was carefully tucked in before stealing all of his stuff? But, he steps into the living room, and finds all of his expensive shit (busted phone, clinging-to-life laptop and A-Cheng's old gaming console) still there. To be fair, his actually expensive things are the art supplies that he spent far too much money on, but people always underestimate how expensive that shit is and it's all still tossed around on his desk - no, wait. No it's not tossed around randomly, it's been organised. Everything has. His apartment looks relatively tidy compared to how it was the night before.

Is the hangover fairy actually real?? He stumbles around, brows furrowed and eyes squinted against the evil sun as he tries to figure out what the hell's going on, and finds himself in the kitchen. Gone are the shitty takeout boxes and empty packets of noodles (but the huge bags of rice and pasta remain on the counter. Because rice and pasta are saviours on a budget), and there's instead a note, written in that gorgeous script he has watched be written out countless times, and he feels mortification start to rise in his chest. He picks it up, grimacing prematurely whilst opening it up and scanning over the note. Oh yeah. It's bad. Never in his life has he been so drunk to first message someone in such a state - let alone his therapist (it doesn't matter that he's never had one before) - and then hand his address over without any sort of thought for his safety. It doesn't matter what Huaisang says, he's never letting him gift him alcohol again if this is what happens to him with it. TO be fair, it was also mixed with those other bottles of cheap wine, and maybe that was the issue. Not the delectable wine he had been handed for his birthday because he was a cutie who knew what his bestie needed.

Anyway, that is besides the point. What the real issue is, is the fact that he messaged Lan Zhan while drunk and was a whiny bitch, leading the man to come over, tuck him into bed and clean his fucking apartment. AND make him congee, which is in the fridge??? What the fuck. All thoughts of mindlessly eating cereal are gone from his head as he lunges for the food, obediently dumping in the vegetables that Lan Zhan very directly told him that he needs to eat with it, and then makes it the most beautiful dish ever with a shit ton of hot sauce. So, he devours that mindlessly instead. And then he throws himself into the living room, grabbing his phone and sending Lan Zhan a message filled with as much gratitude he can muster, heavily abusing all heart adjacent emojis to really get his point across. It's not a moment later that the man himself is responding, both acknowledging and sincerely insisting that the gratitude is unnecessary, and apologising for going to his apartment in the first place, telling him that it was a breach of patient-therapist code. Wei Ying says that he doesn't care, and that he'll stop being a client if it means Lan Zhan comes over again. Then he realises what that means and just throws his phone across the room.

[sillygoofyqueer]

Up on the schedule we haaave HANGUANG-JUN GOES TO THE FUTURE AU (AKA @lyngracetalksnwritesnstuff's birthday present AU)! We're coming from a different angle this time hehehe... When he opens his eyes, there is bright, ugly lights shining around him. There is muffled talking that he can't understand somewhere off to his left, and he is instantly irritated by his surroundings as he shoves himself up after learning he's laying down. The rock he's apparently been laying on is more than a little uncomfortable, but he can't really be bothered to complain about it when there are better things to complain about. Like, for instance, the fact that he's stuck in a strange room that's apparently made entirely of smooth rock, some form of glass separating him from two strangely-dressed men. They must be criminals, shorn off hair the key indicator of the manner, and he grins. Criminals have always been fun to mess with - they think they're so tough, and then he shows them just a taste of what he can do and they go scampering off like rats. So, he flounces over to the glass, not stopping even when he realises that they have taken his sword, and knocks on it casually. "It's rude to ignore someone!" He calls out when they turn from where they have been talking to each other and stare at him like they're surprised he can see them.

They stare at each other for a moment, before the man in gold reaches down and presumably pushes something not visible from his angle. He says something but it's muffled, and he's about to complain about it, when something crackles around him and he spins around suspiciously. No fire, but a distorted voice calls out "Xue Chengmei?" Xue Yang raises a brow at the use of his courtesy name but grins nonetheless, mockingly saluting the two men with a flourish as he replies "Call me Xue Yang! Everyone does." Apparently, he doesn't need to press anything in order to be heard, and he can hear his voice muffled (but he can't understand it...which shouldn't be possible) out through the glass. It sounds distorted as well, and his fingers itch to rip into whatever is causing that effect so he can ogle over the inner workings of it. The man in gold says something to the man in white and blue who...hey! "You look like an ugly counterfeit of the Lans!" He taps on the glass to point at the man in question, who gets delightfully pissed off and apparently tries to yell at him in that muffled tone, but the button isn't being pressed and so he can't hear him. That doesn't stop him from pulling a face at him though, just to piss him off more.

The man in gold says like a single word and the fake-Lan immediately stops, which is interesting. Like a dog on a leash...something he tucks away for later perusal as he turns away to check out the room he's in. Now, where's the entrance? The crackling sound echoes around again, but he doesn't look over his shoulder as he scans the walls carefully. "Xue Yang, my name is Jin Guangyao. This is Su Minshan. You are currently in a different time period to the one you were once in." Now, the sentences themselves have missing words, but he picks up on the general meaning as he finally spots the cracks in the wall that are too straight and uniform to be anything but a hidden door. He marks it out but of course turns around the second that they mention him not being in his 'time period'. What. Pause. "Then where am I?" He asks, and Jin Guangyao smiles at him. "The future, of course. We have...summoned you so you can assist us." Once again, words are missing, and he has a feeling that they are perhaps not actually speaking his language as he tilts his head at them. "How did you manage that?" He asks in interest, and Jin Guangyao just smiles secretively without answering.

On the other side of the glass, Jin Guangyao is having a very good day. His father's approval has never been more in his reach than in this moment. He had managed to use ancient, mythical summoning rituals (found buried within the historical vaults of the Jin, thrown there as nobody had ever presumed magic could be real) to summon the infamous Xue Chengmei from history to crush their enemies. The man had been known for his crimes of all kinds and, if you were to believe in it, the twisting of 'cultivation' to puppeteer living humans to fulfil his deeds. Just what Jin Guangyao needs for control over all industries. As he listens to Xue Yang speculate on how they managed to drag him out from his time period, he turns to Su Minshan with a smile. After all, they never would have managed something like this if the man hadn't managed to steal those notes from one of Lan Qiren's students - from idle notes on a translator that could be programmed to hold all known characters from two languages and create communication, to almost obsessive rambling about different figures and practices in history, Wei Ying's notes had been invaluable in the summoning of Xue Yang.

The best part is, according to Su Minshan, Wei Ying's apparent poor memory - a result of a car accident in his youth, he had found with research - means that he has likely forgotten about the notes already. "Truly commendable work," he praises lightly, and Su Minshan preens - so desperate for compliments about how great he is, how easy to manipulate. "It was no trouble, Jin-Xiansheng! That idiot Wei Ying can't remember anything that isn't related to his brats or his little project about the Lan," he sneers, and Jin Guangyao smiles but keeps his opinions to himself. While they have been having this sidebar, Xue Yang has been using blood upon the hidden door, pressing his hand with it and watching as it explodes but the door remains unharmed. They look through what was supposed to be one-way glass and he tilts his head at the manic grin on Xue Yang's face as he turns back to them, sleeve on fire. "Splendid!" He calls through the translator. "I suppose that Hanguang-Jun is in another room, yes?" Now it is Jin Guangyao's turn to pause. He shares a look with Su Minshan, whose eyes are wide at the mention of the famous Lan. "What?" He asks into the translator, and Xue Yang's grin turns positively cheshire. "He was with me when we were both grabbed by a flash of light." This is. Bad.

[sillygoofyqueer]

Alright alright, schedule proclaims deity jester Wei Wuxian AU be spoken about today! (Note: to all askers, I will answer your asks after I've hacked through the schedule <3) Wei Ying does not know much about the world that he has woken up in, does not know how it works or how to live in it, but he does know how to write his name (taught by Master in order to introduce himself to the king, when it was necessary), so he can tell the humans his name when they ask. Mama always told him that every creature had a name, and Master told him that the name was inscribed upon whatever he found to summon him with that haunting song that just wouldn't Leave Him Alone. So, he takes careful care of all the names he is told - Wen Ning is the human who was snatched by the spirits of the battlefield, Wen Qing is the scary one who took charge of building his body back up after it was torn by the earth trying to hold him as close as possible, and Wen-Popo is the one who made him a new outfit. She's even making him a new hat to go with it, which he delights in with the thought of being able to hear his jingling bells once more. There is something else he knows, and that is nature. An intrinsic part of him is connected to it, and it is a part of him as much as he is a part of him. He wishes to show that he is grateful for them helping him despite the fact that he cannot truly be trusted, and he knows how.

Wen Ning spends a lot of time out upon the fields, and A-Yuan likes to tell him about it because he does not speak but he listens very well. Apparently, whatever the fields yield are a large part of the 'income' (which he has learned has to do with the pieces of metal that humans seem to care about a lot) and food of the family, and every bit of metal they receive assists them in their survival within the village. So, with this thought in mind, he lets A-Yuan lead him out onto the fields so they can watch Wen Ning work because 'he's so strong, Wei-gege!' He is strong; the spirits of the battlefield favour the strong, and often their snatched humans gain more strength as a result. He decides that he can help with this, at least, and waits for the humans to be distracted before he wanders into the sprawling fields and buries his hands into the dirt. Instantly, it sings back to him, greeting him warmly and excitedly, and he pulls upon it, telling it to grow quickly, to blossom up with fruits and wheat and vegetables. Of course, nature answers him as it is just another part of him, and the fields begin to raise with plants for him. A-Yuan comes running just as he takes his hands from the soil, and Wei Ying feels guilty, as he was always told that he should not show magic around humans that do not know what he is.

However, A-Yuan just exclaims in delight, squealing that 'Wei-gege is magic like Ning-gege!' as he goes running through the wheat. Wei Ying blinks, and supposes that he is magic in a similar way to Wen Ning, except he is a creature that the forest itself answers to, and Wen Ning has to answer to the spirits instead. He cannot and would not say that though, so he just begins to hunt for the small human amongst the wheat, earning another squeal when he pounces upon him and engulfs him in a tight hug. That is something else he is good at - entertaining the small humans that the large humans call children. He was ordered to do it a lot back when he was dancing in the royal court, and they are still entertained by the same things, if A-Yuan's reactions are anything to go by. He laughs and claps and cheers at his dances and how he stumbles over himself; the same things that entertained a court full of humans are being used to entertain A-Yuan and, later, his family. They appreciate the more complex dances that he was taught by other villagers back before he was enveloped into the ground and made to sleep, and he feels like he is doing something right whenever they clap and laugh for him.

It is nice to feel wanted, but there is still a pressing in his chest. He still remembers finding the blood and the dead bodies of those little children, and he aches at every reminder of it. It Hurts. He wishes to find his master and make him pay for what he did - and, he wishes to tear down any reminder of his master's time upon the throne. He angers. he hates. And he sees what he first believes to be his master walking towards the Wen home, but soon realises to be just a human that appears to look like Master. This human seems to cause the Wen family some form of emotional reaction, and they tuck A-Yuan away into his room with fabric animals to keep him company. Wei Ying blinks, and this human is seemingly talking to him, its irritating voice leaving him blinking down at it and contemplating how difficult would be to just kill it. He doesn't really understand what it is saying, because its voice is shrill and frustrating and he really wants to kill it just for what it represents but then it finally says a word he can understand. 'Perform'. It seems to be asking him to perform. He dislikes it and what it is doing, but he does like to perform. So he does. He dances to music that only he can hear, but the human seems to prefer when he pretends to stumble and trip and fall.

Next thing he knows, the human is talking to him once more, and it is speaking very slowly to him (he does not know why - is it to mock him?) but it helps listen through the shrill voice. It wants him to return with it to the castle, and a violent feeling flashes through him at even the mention of a castle coming from the mouth of a human that looks like Master. Suddenly, all he wants to do is follow it home and tear the castle to shreds, but he also wishes not to leave the Wen. He points to them slowly, and the human scoffs. The next thing it says is very easy to understand - It wishes for him to go with it, or the Wens' crops will burn. This cannot happen, both because it would be the death of nature and because the constant crops are a gift from him to the Wens. To take that away from them would leave them without 'income' and without food. He remembers, in this moment, the cruelty of humans, all too reminded of the villagers that chased him out after his mama and baba were killed while hunting, believing that he was the one to dole out such a fate. He wishes to destroy the human, and almost does it, but there is something about how the Wens seem resigned without fighting, and how the human's peer (one touched by the spirits of the flames, he can see) stares at him, that leaves him following.

[sillygoofyqueer]

AHGOHRHHGHRGI HEXXXUAUAUAUANNNAN UGUAUGHAHGUAGHRGNRI HE XUAAAAAANNNNN IT'S TIME FOR THE CULT LEADER HE XUAN AU - AKA THE 'IT'S NOT A CULT' AU!!!! HYPE HYPE HYPE!!! People should totally ask me about this AU for no reason in particular. We're going non-linear for this one, boys. If you remember, I left the first post off when He Xuan stumbled back into his village after death and found himself led to a shrine dedicated to him. Now? I want to take you six hundred years into the future. Xie Lian has been back in the heavens long enough to complete the Ghost Groom mission and the Banyue mission, when he's called on by Jun Wu after the hearing of Pei Xu. Instead of being told of a distress signal sent out by a god in Ghost City, he's told of a cult that has been around for centuries, its mysterious leader having as much reach as the gods themselves without ever actually ascending, their worshippers avid and staunch in their loyalty to the individual that they worship. The Heavens know virtually nothing about this leader, aside from the fact that they are associated with the ocean and death. Any officials they have sent to investigate the cult have gone radio silent, presumably having been either killed or actually folded into the cult, joining the tight-lipped worshippers in their silence. Xie Lian is asked to try and investigate the cult because there's the least chance of him being dragged into the cult or being killed.

Xie Lian's like "yeah why not, the sooner I get this done the sooner I can chillax with San Lang again." And when he descends from the Heavens, he finds San Lang already waiting there (because there's no escaped god issue to deal with) like "can this lowly one join gege on his travels?" despite having no idea what the mission actually is. It gets better though, because the ever-familiar 'Nan Feng' and 'Fu Yao' are at his door being all like "yeah we're here because you can't just infiltrate a cult alone- what the FUCK IS HE DOING HERE?!" After all of that's sorted out, the Xianle Quartet are heading to the nearest village that the cult has within its grasp, and San Lang suddenly goes "hold on wait what cult." Xie Lian tells him what little he knows, and suddenly the man is grimacing, because it's obvious that he knows something about the cult - something that Fu Yao is quick to snap about. Xie Lian asks about it, and San Lang goes "I'm pretty sure I would be killed if I told you what I know. I can lead you to the right place but I actually have to watch my mouth for once 😔" This answer has Nan Feng going "oh shit how serious is this fucking thing" and Xie Lian couldn't put it better himself. He assures San Lang that it's okay if he can't tell him anything (much to the others' dismay) and that they'll figure it out themselves.

So, San Lang takes them all to what he says is the 'origin village' of the cult (by that, I mean he uses the dice to escort Xie Lian there and throws the location to Nan Feng and Fu Yao over his shoulder so they can get there themselves), and they enjoy some food while they wait for the two 'middle court officials' to get there at Xie Lian's whim. Because there's just so many food stalls and establishments everywhere, it's hard not to get intrigued by everything; he hasn't even heard of some of these foods! San Lang tells him that food is a big thing in the cult, and apparently he's allowed to say that because it's easy to glean from everything around them. Fu Yao and Nan Feng finally make it to them, glaring at San Lang like he's done something wrong. and he just laughs at their expense while Xie Lian tries to divert the attention with all of the food. Nan Feng is rather interested, but Fu Yao is like "and what's done with what isn't sold? Seems rather wasteful" which is a good point, one that a voice behind them explains "none of the food goes to waste." Everyone startles at being spoken to, and San Lang pulls a face as though he recognises the voice, with all of them spinning to see who's just spoken to them about something that Xie Lian is actually very interested in.

Hua Cheng knows that He Xuan is Unappreciative of him bringing gods along to his home when he finds Yin Yu standing there. Usually, the high priest is busy helping out with answering prayers and dealing with the technical side of this whole thing, so to have him here Right Now is not a good thing. Predictably, Yin Yu turns immediately to him and goes "are you stupid, perhaps? You know He dislikes gods in his space." Even through the veil that obscured his features, Hua Cheng can feel his judgmental gaze and rolls his eye while he gestures to Xie Lian calmly. "High Priest, may I introduce Dianxia to Him?" Now everything is clear to Yin Yu, who cocks his head as he looks at Xie Lian through that veil - "Ah, you're just a sap" - before nodding to Idiots #1 and #2 as though he isn't well aware who they are. "And them?" "Stragglers." Ignoring the offended response he receives from Idiot #2 about this, he keeps his eye on Yin Yu as he cocks his head the other way, obviously talking to He Xuan through their communication array. It's not often that Hua Cheng feels uneasy, but being knee deep in another ghost king's territory is one of those few times, and he has to act like he isn't itching to reach for E'Ming.

He knows for certain that Yin Yu is drawing this out just to toy with him (likely at He Xuan's whim) because those two are highly efficient in all matters not related to 'knocking him down a few pegs.' They know he hates this. Soon, however, the banished god is untucking one of his hands from where they were settled in his sleeves in front of him, gesturing with it and saying "He will allow His Highness entry, but the stragglers need to stay in the village," which is fine by him. Next thing he knows, Dianxia is tucking his hand into the crook of his elbow and squeezing it lightly as though he can see the discomfort he's trying to hide. Dianxia is truly the best, nobody can compare to him. Idiots #1 and #2 seem to understand that there's no reason to fight on this, no matter how much Idiot #2 appears to wish to as he watches them follow Yin Yu through the crowd that parts around them. The veiled man takes his time, greeting people as he passes and graciously taking any food they want him to give to He Xuan (or just want to give to him), but Dianxia doesn't seem to mind. Reluctantly, Hua Cheng does have to admit that the village itself is a rather interesting place, filled with lights and laughter even with the motifs of sea and death permeating every lamp and stall and even the people's outfits.

When they eventually make it to the shrine - He Xuan never likes to call it a temple, says that it makes it sound up its own ass - it looks rather anti-climactic, at first. A regular shrine, decorated with dark blue veils and hanging lanterns from the roof. Then they step in, and it is bigger on the inside. It's decorated to have the link to deep underwater caves, small ponds dug into the floor with white flowers floating around upon the surface as fish of all kinds (dead and alive) swim around in them. Towards the back of the room, a raised altar sits. More translucent veils are hung up around it, offerings decorating the steps up to it and, draped upon it like it's a chair, sits He Xuan. He hasn't even had the decency to dress properly, those dark robes with silver embroidery depicting skeletal fish swimming through chrysanthemums and lilies (unlike what Yin Yu's own robes and veil in that they are more detailed and decorated) half open, deathly pale skin pulled over the protruding ribcage. Claws slide across the altar as he moves, unbound black hair falling down around his frame and dark, bottomless blue eyes scrutinise them in a sharp, assessing manner that belies his languid, almost lazy, movements. He Xuan, given the name Black Water Sinking Ships, looks mildly amused.

[sillygoofyqueer]

Up on the schedule for THIS fine day is Mad Scientist Wei Wuxian AU - of the disciples era variety! Last time, we had Wei Wuxian being one of them damn queers and Lan Wangji getting his first look at the man who very much will be pestering him for the whole year. Wei Ying isn't quite sure what he's done to gain Lan Qiren's attention, but the man is asking him questions all throughout the lecture, rarely even looking to other disciples for answers. This would be fine - interesting, even! - if the questions weren't so boring, with such bland answers. He's itching to talk more, to tell the man about his studies with more experimental cultivation, but he knows that Wen Ruohan would probably gut him for doing something like that. He isn't even really sure why he wants to tell Lan Qiren so much; maybe it's for a reaction, maybe it's because he can see that interest of a scholar when he talks, it's hard to really say. But, he manages to hold strong. He talks about how to deal with a spirit without so much as referencing resentful energy as a way to fuel other things, and he can see the way Wen Qing relaxes so incrementally with every second he goes not even breathing a word about his cultivation methods. He's doing the clan proud, which is good, because everything else about this lecture was fucking boring! He already knows this stuff, and he was really hoping to learn more while he was here.

However, he resigns himself to just pretending to pay attention in lectures, doodling away on his paper and instead making notes about other things he has darting around his brain instead of just sticking to what he's supposed to be making notes about. At the end of the lecture, he folds them up and shoves them into his qiankun sleeves, yawning as he moves to stand up and follow his siblings out so he can complain to them about how boring it had all been, when Lan Qiren calls for him to stay. Of course, other people start muttering amongst themselves as they go (except for that god of a boy who sat next to him, who just continues to walk out), and his siblings look panicked at leaving him alone, but he shrugs and tells them he'll be fine. Instead of getting yelled at or scolded for obviously not paying attention unless called upon, Lan Qiren asks him how much of that he already knew. When he says that he knew all of it, there's no surprise in the man's eyes, and he just nods as if he expected such an answer. Wei Ying isn't sure what he himself is expecting, so he doesn't know what to do when he's handed another schedule, different from the one he was given at the start, and is then sent out of the room.

A-Ning and Qing-jie are waiting for him outside, asking him what Lan Qiren said to him, what they spoke about, and Wei Ying just shows them the schedule almost exuberantly. 'I'm actually going to learn new stuff!' He exclaims and A-Ning laughs while Qing-jie rolls her eyes, but they both seem more relaxed and that's all that matters. Out of nowhere though, comes a more idle voice - 'you mean you already knew all that?!' Instantly, all three of the siblings look over to the source of the voice, and a boy in Nie green looks mortified that he so much as spoke, face paling behind his fan. He starts apologising, but Wei Ying is fascinated by this Nie after being told that all Nies were meatheads who hated femininity and fought like animals over everything. So, he humours the boy. Tells him that yeah, he does already know all that stuff, and compliments his fan for good measure because it is an exquisite fan. The boy practically lights up at the compliment, still nervous but less so as he tells him that he's been doing this two years in a row and he still can't remember any of it. Nie Huaisang (that's what he says his name is) is rather funny, and Wei Ying is pretty excited at the thought of having a new friend.

After that, things get more interesting. While he still has to go to the usual lectures, he's now going to cool one-on-one sessions with Lan Qiren (and sometimes with that gorgeous gorgeous boy, Lan Wangji) about anything and everything that he's interested in at that moment, from talismans to the histories of clans to cultivation techniques from other sects! Now, he knows there's probably a lot of censorship surrounding said history of the clans, but it's interesting to see other sides to it, for sure. He's also gaining more friends every day! Now that Nie Huaisang has started talking to him, complaining to him and even draping himself over him as he begs for help with notes, other disciples actually start talking to him. They're more wary than Nie Huaisang, but it's better than going all the way to another part of the Jianghu and not even talking to anyone but his siblings the whole time while he was there. Not that he doesn't love talking to his siblings - no, he's dragging them into conversation and hyping them up at every turn! - he's just always wanted more people that talk to him without staring in fear at the blood splattered over his robes or whispering behind his back about the experiments he did in his room.

[sillygoofyqueer]

Hello Four!! I hope you are doing well!! You said i could ask some questions on the KPDH X MXTX au!! So here they are! :3

(Also I’m writing this late at night so if these have already been answered pls throw me into the abyss)

1. Are their other Wens besides A’Yuan? Aka Wen Ning, Wen Qing- the bad Wens the good Wens- all the Wens LOLOL

2. Is Bai Wuxiang Gwi-Ma ? (I know it was said he is a ruler of demons but i wanted to double check LOL…)

3. The Grandmasters or The Gui Pot or MoGui Boys… what is the name of the WWX led group?

4. I just want more Wen Ning or Mo Xuanyu i love those freaks 😔 anywho i added 4 questions bc u like the number four…

I hope you have a lovely day!

Hey pookie pie! I'm doing great, I hope you're doing alright too. I did indeed say you could ask questions about the KPDH x MXTX AU in preparation for today, and so I will answer these questions to fulfill the schedule!! Don't apologise for having things that I may have touched upon, it just means I didn't touch upon them enough yet!!! 1. There are, in fact, other Wens beside A-Yuan! I like glanced over them when introducing the baby, but I specified that they were a clan that secretly worked very closely with demons. This means that there are a lot more half-demons (or quarter demons or three quarter demons etc etc) in the Wen Clan because there's a lot of overlap between the two groups. Wen Ning and Wen Qing, for instance, are both quarter-demons, but Wen Ning seems to have inherited a lot of the demon from both of his parents where Wen Qing did not. I'll talk about them more shortly >:]

2. So, Bai Wuxiang is NOT Gwi-Ma! He is the ruler of all demons, but he was not supposed to be! He took over by killing the original ruler (Tianlang-Jun's father) after he became too power-hungry in his cultivation and began losing his humanity in his chase for power, so much so that patterns began showing up on his skin and he became the very thing he had sought to destroy. He killed two of his other partners (the other state preceptors from canon) but was killed Mei Nianqing before he could deal the final blow upon him, which doomed him to the demon realm. He had gained a lot of power as a demon even before he died, so it was easy to kill the original ruler and take his place (and his power as well). The PREVIOUS Tianlang-Jun was more like Gwi-Ma, because he was supposed to be the ruler of the demons.

3.

I'm answering it anyway because I can give a more interesting answer (ignore the shitty quality of the screenshot I have no idea why it's like that)! So, yes, our boyband are known as the Mogui Boys, but I do think that it'd be silly for their fandom to call them the Gui Pot. I don't know why, NO THAT'S A LIE I DO! Because gui obviously means ghosts, and a lot of the Mogui Boys' songs have references to or are related to the supernatural (not all of them, but a lot of them) (also, free info about the kind of songs they perform teehee), so it's like "the pot of ghosts" because most of the songs they cook are about ghosts! I'm such a fucking genius I will be taking no criticism that is their fun silly nickname from the fandom.

4. My favourite number and my name! Everyone's learning to settle in as part of a boyband, and Mo Xuanyu's settling in being surrounded by demons all the time after growing up with them painted as evil monsters all of his life. He's kind of disillusioned with all that after the third time he watches Hua Cheng argue with He Xuan about leaving room for other people on the couch while the latter demon lounges across it and shows no remorse for his actions. Of course, Wei-gege is still the coolest guy ever to him, especially because he's building up a whole idol group while doing odd jobs for others (whether that be technical jobs or demon hunting for in-the-know non-hunters) and raising a kid. Well - two kids, now! So, he's living with his cool idol and is picking up chores where he can (grocery shopping, doing the dishes, babysitting) all while he's learning how to actually cultivate and even gets taught how to do makeup from Wei-gege and a stoic Mobei-Jun as a practice doll. So, when Wei-gege announces that A-Yuan's táng xiōng (older cousin) is coming over, he doesn't question it.

Wen Ning is very much so a demon, on par with Mobei-Jun in terms of his features, and he's the sweetest, shyest guy ever. He's huge, but he hunches his shoulders in and ducks his head to make himself smaller, he lets A-Yuan clamber all over him, and looks at Wei-gege like he's god given human form, which Mo Xuanyu can completely understand. Most importantly, Wen Ning has SO much hair, and he lets him do whatever he wants with it, practicing so many different hairstyles that he can no longer do on Wei-gege because of The Hair Accident. It's easy to practice on him as well, because he is just naturally super still, and doesn't even complain when he accidentally yanks at his hair with the brush. This is all while he's awkwardly listening to Hua Cheng ramble on and on about "his god" (he's taking the idol worship of Xie Lian a little too far in a fellow fanboy's opinion), and fielding questions from Luo Binghe about what it was like to live in the human realm as a demonic individual. He always looks like he's going to cry. Wei-gege treats him like another didi.

[sillygoofyqueer]

So up on the schedule for today, we've got the Mad Scientist Wei Wuxian AU! Tripping around blindly through all of my posts on this fucker and grinning devilishly. Wei Ying is sick of waiting. He is staring down at all he has accomplished; the wooden hand he has struggled over day and night to ensure it works exactly how a normal hand does, the wards he has built up around camp, so strong that he had actually had to pull back on the strength to ensure that people could still get in and out, with so many different talismans and possible tools he has slaved over. All a desperate plea and apology for everything he has done, how badly he has fucked up. It's not enough. Not for what he has done. The voices that have been plaguing his mind ever since he was dropped into the Burial Mounds are eating away at everything else in his thoughts. They whisper and snarl and hiss, all telling him that the attack was all his fault, and that nothing he could do could make up for the pain and bloodshed that he has caused. He fights through day after day without sleep, not wanting to so much as look away until he has made up for all of his sins, gently holding A-Yuan close. And, eventually, gently passing him off to Lan Zhan, because A-Yuan deserves to be with someone whose hands aren't covered in the blood of innocents.

He doesn't let anyone into his tent, using those very wards he designed for camp to keep everyone out, and doesn't even leave for food. He can hear what's going on outside, but they cannot hear what he's doing, all through the night as he hooks deeper into his reserves and forces himself to do more. He knows that A-Ning is okay now, and that A-Yang has adjusted to his hand quickly, and that everything is better now. People bustle by outside his tent, most trying to plead him to come out, but Nie Huaisang just sits there and tells him about what has happened every day, leaning against the entrance and chattering on endlessly. Lan Zhan comes by every day, a soft plea on his lips, often followed by his beloved family, all trying to draw him out. Eventually, Wei Ying stops being able to hear anything, so plagued by the voices hissing and spitting at him because he's just not doing anything worthy of forgiveness. No matter what he makes, no matter what he does, it will never be enough to make up for it all. His selfish needs were put above everyone else's, and people died for it. He's a fucking mess. It's not that he doesn't want to be around everyone, he just doesn't deserve that sort of comfort.

Nobody knows what to do about Wei Wuxian. He's basically blocked himself off from everyone else, and nobody can get through the wards to see if he's okay. A-Yuan is sobbing every day, screaming for 'Baba', and Lan Zhan looks more and more broken with every day that the tent remains closed. Wen Qionglin has recovered quite well under the constant care of his jiejie, and he only really wants to see his gege for that reassurance that everything's going to be okay, because everything's okay when his gege says it's okay. Xue Yang is going basically feral, prowling around the tent in the hopes that he can manage to drag his gege out the second he drops those wards down, having to be dragged away every single day to ensure he sleeps. Plus, there's the issue of the tall fuckass monster casually wandering around the camp, scaring the shit out of everyone when It appears so randomly despite being so obvious and constantly being followed by crows (all of which are often congregating around Wei Wuxian's tent). Everyone is stressed out, whether out of fear of what Wei Wuxian's doing in there or out of worry for him.

Eventually, the Burial Mounds gets bored of chasing crows around all the time. It knows that Its son is in one of the strange fabric shelters, and is drawn to the mass amounts of resentful energy that seems to be concentrated into that area, so decides to deal with the issue in Its own way. These silly humans, all unable to break through the apparent wards that are built entirely of resentful energy, unable to parse through every intricate string building up into an unbreakable fortress. The Burial Mounds, being also made of resentful energy, lumbers over to the area, ignoring whoever may be following It (except when Lan Wangji and the Baby appear, because that's family!), and reaches into the wards. It grasps at them easily with Its malformed hands, digging in and pulling it apart in chunks because nothing overwhelms resentful energy more than a being made of the stuff. It practically absorbs the stuff (immediately going into the Yin Tiger Tally, even as It shrinks down), and then points what It assumes to be the opening for Lan Wangji to go into it. Lan Wangji hesitates, but the deafening silence that is emanating from the tent despite the broken wards has him handing the Baby to It and going in. Yay, Baby!!

Lan Zhan pushes back the flap into Wei Ying's tent and steps inside before he can think too hard about what he's doing, and is horrified by the sight. Wei Ying is hunched over his desk, in the same robes he was in when he handed A-Yuan to him with few words, and he looks to be an absolute mess. What weight he had managed to put on after coming to camp has rapidly deteriorated during his self-imposed isolation, black veins standing out against his sickly pale skin and eyes stained black with the same resentful energy that has left black patches spattered all over his skin. Blood drips from gashes on his hands, blood mixed with ink splashed across his face and all over the table, staining a few scrolls of many thrown around the room in varying states of being filled or ripped apart, his bed covered in other scrolls and destroyed fabric scribbled with blood. Wei Ying himself is barely even breathing, let alone thinking, tears dripping down his face as he stares emptily at the desk, and he is shaking violently, curled into himself. He looks gaunt, tired, and yet is muttering to himself despite not being able to apparently process anything else.

Of course, Lan Zhan immediately stumbles over and wraps Wei Ying into a firm embrace without even thinking, not stopping when the man startles and automatically struggles in his grasp. Nails dig into his forearms and scratch and tear, but he holds tight, beginning to hum Cleansing, burying his face into Wei Ying's shoulder when it doesn't seem to do anything. Out of desperation to calm him down, he starts humming the song he had been composing ever since the Xuanwu of Slaughter, every note a nervous tremble with his soft hum - he had hoped he would have more time to work it out, to finish it off, to at least present it to Wei Ying in some sort of big, perfectly planned romantic moment. But here he is, rocking him back and forth in a gentle but firm embrace and humming it into his ear, heart hammering in his chest. To both his relief and surprise, it starts working, the boy eventually relaxing down into his grasp and burying his head into his shoulder, nails now digging from how hard he is grabbing onto Lan Zhan, as though scared he will leave if he lets go. Nonsensical. Very soon, others will come sprinting in, but right now, it's just Wei Ying and Lan Zhan, listening to the song that he made for them.

[sillygoofyqueer]

Ok so, following the convo we we're having in discord:

MBJ got his hamster stolen from right under his nose lmao, and now he even has a wife and an adorable little babey. He should apply for second wife.

SQH doesn't have a single clue what's happening or why the sect leader is looking at his with murder in his eyes.

-Chablie

Hello Chablie hello hello Chablie hello. I've actually forgotten everything about this apart from the fact that we had the conversation and that Mobei-Jun is intent on one-upping Shen Jiu. NEVERMIND, I'VE UNLOCKED MY BRAIN. Okay so, see, the thing is, Shang Qinghua isn't married to Shen Jiu yet. Why is this? Shen Jiu is waiting for Shang Qinghua to finally ask him to marry him, and Shang Qinghua is like "damn I hope Shen-shixiong finds a husband so he doesn't have to resort to leaving little baby A-Yuan with me all the time." He thinks he's the worst babysitter ever while A-Yuan is toddling around and calling him Baba, all the while hissing and biting at anyone else who tries to interact with him because he Doesn't Like Humans. So, technically, it's more just an almost-baby trapping situation except it just misses the mark because Shang Qinghua thinks he's the place holder for a father until someone actually worthy of Shen Jiu comes along. Yue-Shixiong, please don't kill him, he's just not remotely a threat which is why A-Yuan likes him!!!

So. This means that, while Shen Jiu has a leg up in the competition, Mobei-Jun still has a shot of being first wife. He's been courting Shang Qinghua longer, and this little human will not stop him from getting his little rat husband. If a child is what has drawn Shang Qinghua's attention away from him, then a child is what Mobei-Jun needs to find. Of course, this is found in the form of toddler Luo Binghe, who looks a lot like Shang Qinghua (much more than the human's child), and goes pretty easily because "wow that's a big demon and oh okay I'm being picked up now. I'm two I have no idea what's going on." He takes his child back to Shang Qinghua and goes "our child. Take responsibility." Shang Qinghua doesn't even realise this is Luo Binghe at first and so legitimately assumes that that's his kid without ANY question because hey they did hold hands that one time, maybe demon biology is different-

Cue smug Mobei-Jun and pissed off Shen Jiu fighting over who gets to marry him first while Shang Qinghua sits in the background entertaining the babies because he's good with kids.

[sillygoofyqueer]

Would Yue Qingyuan try to be the father that stepped up to Crowyuan in the au where Sqq adopts him?

Hello Anon, I do want to thank you for your ask because I'm about to become brutal to this poor guy. NOT YOU, Yue Qingyuan. Okay, so Yue Qingyuan would certainly try to be the father that stepped up, but it just would NOT stick. First of all, baby Crowyuan is terrified of humans as it is (thanks, Liu Qingge), and Yue Qingyuan is a massive powerhouse. While other humans are easily settled because of how he hunches his shoulders and smiles sweetly, Crowyuan's danger instinct goes OFF and the moment he's in the same room as Yue Qingyuan, he starts bawling. Poor man is crushed by this, and he's all like "I'm going to KILL MYSELF" every time it happens because what do you mean a child, especially Xiao-Jiu's child, is scared of him?! He's like a soggy dog and people can't look at him too long because it's like "oh..that poor thing..." Meanwhile, Mu Qingfang is in the background like "Jesus Fucking Christ" because his sect leader is coming to him like "how do I make myself less scary?? :("

For TWO, Shen Jiu isn't even giving Yue Qingyuan a chance to be the father who stepped up! He sees Yue Qingyuan coming and goes "UGH, not this guy again," and turns to Shang Qinghua - the guy he forced to step up - to hand him the baby. Of course, Crowyuan isn't scared of Shang Qinghua because he's weak and pathetic, so he lets this happen and is like "Baba!!" Shang Qinghua, on the other hand, has no clue what's going on and assumes that Shen Jiu is just handing him the baby because nobody would ever infer that they were together and A-Yuan isn't scared of him. That's totally the only reason. Because why would Shen-shixiong want him in any capacity that wasn't dead? (Shen Jiu and Shang Qinghua would both be like "look at the hot ass bitch I pulled" when they got together and nobody can tell me otherwise.)

[sillygoofyqueer]

Listen. LISTEN. LISTEN!!!! I PAY ATTENTION DURING THE SESSIONS! I AM A GOOD TEAMMATE WHO LOVES AND RESPECTS THE GRIND. BUT I MUST FEED MY HONEYPIES!!

four makes tumblr posts while we play dnd

You've got NO proof of that, I'm always focused on the sessions!!!!!

[sillygoofyqueer]

Listen. LISTEN. I do it BEFORE the sessions, never DURING the sessions. Also, followers, you should take this as a sign of how much I love you - putting off DND so I can finish posts for my beloveds!

four makes tumblr posts while we play dnd

You've got NO proof of that, I'm always focused on the sessions!!!!!

[sillygoofyqueer]

four makes tumblr posts while we play dnd

You've got NO proof of that, I'm always focused on the sessions!!!!!

[sillygoofyqueer]

Well, it's that time again, you know it, you love it! I'm not surprised by most of these - Crowyuan of all kinds will always dominate the arena, and people be loving the mad scientist AU! Thank god I didn't forget any AUs lmfao. Schedule for the upcoming however long it takes to write these: - SJ adopts Crowyuan AU Asks! - Mad Scientist Wei Wuxian AU - KPDH x MXTX AU (as chosen by a friend) - Mad Scientist Wei Wuxian AU (of the disciples era variety) - Cult Leader He Xuan AU - Deity Jester Wei Wuxian AU - Hanguang-Jun Goes to the Future AU - Dog Therapy AU - MDZS Winged AU - The Jins Call Dibs AU

Don't forget, I will (probably) talk about all AUs! It'll be like a schedule

(also I did post today I promise you should check it out)

[sillygoofyqueer]

O great and wise Four; I hope you have a wonderful day. :)

Thanks so kind, thank you so much!! I hope you have a wonderful day, splendid worshipper in my own personal shrine!

[sillygoofyqueer]

Don't forget, I will (probably) talk about all AUs! It'll be like a schedule

(also I did post today I promise you should check it out)

[sillygoofyqueer]

"FOUR. WE WANT THIS AU." GOD DAMN IT I KNOW ALRIGHT. I've been OVERWHELMED. And BURNT OUT. AND I WILL DO ANOTHER POLL TO FORCE MYSELF INTO A SCHEDULE AGAIN. But...right now?.....I want to talk about a new AU idea...TECHNICALLY!!! It's not a new idea, it's just my take on an AU idea. WWX in the Jin Clan. AU. Jin Zixuan does not like being in dirty spaces. He doesn't like being anywhere with grime or muck that can ruin the robes his mama ordered the servants to lay out for him. This isn't his first time going to the Jiang, but Mama always wants him to look his best, so he can make a good impression on Jiang-guniang. He secretly thinks it's stupid, but he can't say that to Mama, so he just nods and gives her his best smile, because she always smiles back. Even if she's mad - like right now. Due to 'your fuqin's stupid decisions', the ones who were guiding the boat that was supposed to get them to Yunmeng apparently overshot it, and then broke under the rougher waters that existed near Yiling. Mama does not have nice things to say about it, and tells him to step away so she can yell at the guilty party without him learning bad words, so he steps far enough away that Mama can dole out those bad words. He had meant to stay there, under the watchful eye of his guards, but then he hears barking. He likes dogs, and so he immediately wanders off in that direction. His guards follow, of course, but try and stop him when they hear screaming with the dogs. Jin Zixuan, naturally, does not listen.

When he finds the dogs, he finds them biting at a boy around his age. Now, as a cultivator (in training), it's his job to help people out - so, he points at the scene and his guards (unable to tell him no) go to scare away the dogs while he casually wanders up to the boy. Terrified grey eyes stare back at him, huddled against the wall he has pressed himself up against in the chaos of it all. He's bleeding a lot, and he's very dirty. Jin Zixuan does not like dirty things, and he's very bad at talking to people. However, his duties as a cultivator must come first! So, he squares his shoulders and holds out his (clean) hand, saying that he has to make sure the boy is okay after being attacked. (Honestly, he doesn't know why the dogs were attacking him. Dogs are good!) "Jin Zixuan! Why on earth are you touching that creature?!" Is what he hears from his mama as he leads the boy out, but he does not immediately drop the boy's hand like he wants to, instead marching right up to Mama and showing off the boy's injuries. "He's hurt. Good cultivators help people!" It's clear that he won't let up on this and, even though she curls her lip in disgust, she turns to the boy and asks what his name is, which Jin Zixuan probably should have done.

Wei Ying. He whispers the name, quiet and shy, but offers a big smile with it. It's a bright smile, and Jin Zixuan smiles right back. Mama, for some reason, looks very shocked at the boy's name, and starts asking him where his parents are. Oh yeah, where are his parents? Jin Zixuan isn't too good at this cultivator stuff...Wei Ying gets all quiet and sad when Mama brings it up, and he doesn't know what to do when people are sad so he awkwardly pats on his shoulder despite how grimy he is, and tells him not to be sad. This works very well, and Wei Ying smiles at him again. Oh yeah, Jin Zixuan is doing a great job. Mama still looks concerned, and turns to one of the guards, handing them a coin pouch and telling them to find a good inn, to give Wei Ying a wash. Jin Zixuan goes with him, not wanting to leave him with his guards (because they can be kind of scary!), and they leave Mama with an unreadable expression on her face as she turns back to the other servants. They make it to an inn quickly and Jin Zixuan, as Wei Ying's unofficial cultivator bodyguard (he isn't quite sure what they do yet, they haven't gotten too far in those lessons) takes responsibility for helping him bathe when it seems like he's uncomfortable with the others doing it.

He doesn't really know how to - he's always had servants to help him wash - but he's not going to let that stop him from helping in his first ever case! He lets his sleeves be pinned up and tries his hardest to wash Wei Ying's hair while Wei Ying scrubs at the dirt on his skin (it's sooo gross, but Jin Zixuan has to get over it) while his guards watch and contemplate aloud how Mama would feel about this. Mama honestly doesn't like him getting dirty, but she'd understand that this is for the greater good! And when he splashes Wei Ying, it's because the boy splashed him first and retribution is justified in this case. By the time she finally gets into the room they've been in, Wei Ying is dressed in some of Jin Zixuan's inner robes (he's so skinny and small, they're so baggy on him) and they're huddled together at a table while he shows him how to write his name (he's learning new characters). There's a moment of pause, and then he asks if Wei Ying can have something to eat (because he's skinny, duh). Wei Ying perks up at the mention of food, like a dog, and Mama asks him to come with her to get Wei Ying food while he stays in the room. Jin Zixuan doesn't really want to leave his duty, but he does as Mama asks and follows her out of the room.

The first thing she does is ask him how he feels about Wei Ying. Strange question; he barely knows the boy! But, he does listen to everything he says and doesn't care that he doesn't know how to speak to people that aren't servants, and sometimes he laughs at his jokes, and he's very small and skinny and Jin Zixuan doesn't like that. Also, he's scared of dogs and nobody should be scared of dogs! Mama listens as he talks, the two of them walking down to the ground floor of the inn, where they can order food from the innkeeper and have it sent to their room. After this is done, Mama instead decides that they're going to wait for the food (which she never does) so that they can talk more. She tells him that Wei Ying's parents are likely dead, which is why he was on the streets in the first place, and that they could take Wei Ying with them to Lotus Pier. Which is. Not fair. Why should they get to look after his charge?! He's the one who found Wei Ying and helped scare off the dogs, who washed his hair (sort-of) and showed him how to write his name! Luckily, Mama agrees with him, and says that Madam Yu wouldn't like Wei Ying being in Lotus Pier either. Then she asks if he wants to keep the boy. Now, this takes some thought. Wei Ying isn't a dog by any means, but it is his duty to ensure Wei Ying is safe, as a cultivator should! (He thinks.)

Mama looks a little proud of him when he says this, so he must have made a good choice. After that, they feed Wei Ying, who eats like a feral animal, Wei Ying throws up, he starts crying and apologises for wasting food, Jin Zixuan tries to calm him down by patting his shoulder and then has to hug him despite the vomit. They both get washed after that, and Wei Ying cheers up after being goaded into playing in the water. For the first time ever, Jin Zixuan shares a bed when, in the middle of the night, Wei Ying clambers in because there are dogs barking outside and he's scared. It's kind of nice. In the morning, they can't go back by boat, so Wei Ying rides with one of the guards while Jin Zixuan rides with Mama on swords, and it's very funny to hear him excitedly talking about everything he sees. Jin Zixuan is SUCH a good cultivator, his first mission is an absolute success! Plus, Wei Ying is under his care now, so technically, it's his didi. Mama and Fuqin never had another child after him, and he's always wanted a didi, so this is all going to work out perfectly for Jin Zixuan!!!!