#Tony jokes

[ksodirty]

[spielzeugkaiser]

Chopper when he looses: 🐬🐬🐬

[ir0npvrker]

morgan: *finds a stray cat*

morgan: can we keep it?

pepper: your dad is allergic

morgan:

morgan: dad can stay outside

[andaniellight]

I used to obsess over this scene so much so of course I'd want this clip to be in my blog

[docdufresne]

I love Rvb season 7 and I love simmons and donut interactions

[quartzcloud]

The prophecy foretold their arrival. Now we await the astrology b!tch who has everyones birth charts memorized and the short king

[tony-loon]

Huxloween 2024 - Day 13 - Apocalypse -The true end of the world - Idea by @billiam-bonkarius & inspired by  @huxloween 's wonderful promptlist For all non-cat-owners: A hungry cat is as good as four apocalyptic horsemen

[badghostwriter]

Tony: "Kid, where's my tequila?"

Peter: "Uh. I don't. I don't know, Mr Stark."

Tony: "…okay, I really didn't think I'd have to be the one to have this talk with you but I think you need to hear it. Look, kid, I've been where you are. You're trying to be cool, maybe getting mixed up in some things you know aren't right-"

Peter: "THAT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENED."

Tony: "Pete, there's no need to be embarrassed. God knows I'm not in a place to judge you but I want you to have a better life than I did. Making good decisions as a teenager. Maybe. Maybe I should call May. She'd probably be better at this."

Peter: "Don’t call Aunt May! Look I didn't. I didn't drink your tequila, okay?"

Tony: "Oh really? You just took my tequila, didn't drink it and then what? Poured it on- oh my god, Peter tell me you didn't."

Peter: "It was a light stabbing! It works in the movies!"

Tony: "A light stabb- YOU GOT STABBED!?”

[atomikats]

monsieur bonhomme carnaval i can’t get you off my mind

[duocatt]

thank you to augustasands on kofi for your donation! ❤️

✨buy me a coffee?☕️✨

[enbysiriusblack]

modern marauders would have the silliest social media usernames:

james potter- lilyevansbf

marlene mckinnon- lilyevansismywife

dorcasmeadowes- lilytheloml

remus lupin- lilyevanshusband

sirius black- lilyevansnoticeme

mary macdonald- futuremaryevans

peter pettigrew- lilyiloveyou

emmeline vance- lilyevansgf

lily evans- goingtokillmyfriends

[digitulart]

dont hug me i have issues

[milesworld96]

Toxic doomed yaoi kiss vs Toxic doomed yuri kiss; who’s taking the win

[fbfh]

Had to take this to the professional 🫡

We need more dad tony stark content (literally anything you got)

Literally starving

Thank you 😌

thank you for giving me more excuses to talk about this. Tony is such a good fucking dad in general, but he's especially great when you get sick. if you're in new york, he probably notices cause you're not up as early as usual. idk where this came from, but I can hear him clear as day walking into your room and smoothing your hair to wake you up, saying

"Hey pumpkin, sun's out." you only grunt in response, but it's not your usual sassy I don't wanna wake up grunt. It sounds softer, like you actually can't get up yet.

"You feeling okay?" before you can answer, he's totally on it. "jarvis, run a vital scan."

He rolls you over onto your back so he can look at you. you look... pale. you don't have the usual vibrance to your skin, it's gray and faded. you look like if you weren't lying down, you'd pass out. Your eyes are puffy and watery, your lips are chapped. You're not yourself. While Jarvis runs a diagnostic scan on your vitals, Tony also gets to work. he carefully sticks a microneedling patch on your arm to check your blood - something Strange helped him whip up, among many other ways to monitor your health without all that clunky invasive hospital equipment - as Jarvis gives him the low down.

"Elevated body temperature of 101.3 degrees fahrenheit, swelling of the sinuses, elevated white blood count..." Jarvis rambles on and on while describing your simptoms, only interrupted by an agressive coughing fit.

"And a rather nasty productive cough."

You look up at him and try not to get teary, you know crying will just make you feel more dehydrated and achy.

"Dad... I don't feel good..."

He looks down at you so warmly, and with so much love.

"I know, kid."

He stands up, determined to do everything he can to kick this cold in record time.

"Alright, your schedule for the week is cleared." He cuts you off as you object. "Ah-bup-bup-bup. I don't want to hear it. You are officially on bedrest until further notice. Jarvis, order out for some of that soup we like, some cough drops, and popsicles."

He looks down at you.

"You want ice cream? What am I saying, of course you want ice cream. Jarvis, throw in a few pints of Stark raving hazelnuts and bunny tracks."

He grabs the remote for your tv, putting on your favorite movie and has dum-e wheel you in a box of tissues. He grabs some vaseline and cold medicine, along with a fresh cold water and your favorite flavor of sports drink.

"Now. I want you to lay back, I want you to stay cool, and I want you to get some rest. And you're a Stark, so staying cool should be no problem." He gives you a kiss on the forehead, then stands up to move all his work to stuff he can do at home, and tell Pepper to cancel or reschedule the rest so he can spend the rest of the day watching movies and tv shows with you between naps. You can hear him muttering to himself as he calls Steven over to come check on you. If you weren't so tired, you'd find it funny that the only person your dad trusts to be your family doctor is also a wizard.

"Can stop aliens from invading earth, I can make an arc reactor that can fit in the palm of my hand, how have we not cracked this cold and flu season thing yet?" he mutters, making a mental note to discuss it with the rest of the Avengers at the next team meeting. you drift off to sleep feeling a lot better than you did when you woke up, and thinking about debrief folders titled Avengers v. Rhinovirus.

[fihas]

some da stamps i've made over the past week ^_^ > credit is appreciated, but not required if you use any of these!

[po3tictrag3dy]

the casual racism in the pierce the veil fanbase is something that needs to be talked about more tbh