#THE STREAM LEFT ME SO CONFUSED BUT ALSO IDK I WANT TO SEE WHAT WILL HAPPEN IN THE FUTURE??

[shiro-daemon]

?????

[fellshish]

just felt like letting you know im makin my way through your spn bookmarks on ao3 and its saving my life 💚 do you have an ultimate-nothing-compares destiel faves from the bunch?

YES omg these are the fics that rewired my brain changed my life etc:

And this your living kiss (M, 56k): au where dean is a self deprecating former poet who used to write anonymously under the pen name jack allen. Now he’s finding his way back to loving poetry by taking a class at a college taught by professor novak… only he doesn’t know professor novak happens to be the number one jack allen scholar in the country. Amazing. Inspiring. I’ve reread it several times and it’s probably my favourite fic of all time

The cheapest room in the house (E, 89k): one of those fics whose writing i’m jealous of, it’s mind bogglingly good. And hot. The destiel grindr fic — cas downloads grindr and dean helps him. The rituals are SO intricate. But really, nothing i could say could do justice to how good this is.

Fenario (E, 47k): cas empty rescue fic. Certain paragraphs and scenes are just seared into my brain, amazing writing. I still think about “Cas’s legs give out and he pitches forward, falling the rest of the way into Dean’s lap in a mockery of a pieta” — that’s the point where i knew this fic was gonna become a fave

Right where you left me (E, 93k): cas comes back from the empty but it’s years later. He rings the doorbell and finds dean married. This fic was an event while it was still updating. Supremely well written and with an emotional maturity needed for the theme

Am I a man or am I a muppet (G, 7k): one of the funniest fics i’ve ever read. Dean wakes up as a muppet. Just roll with it! It’s crack, sure, but so good?? This inspired a scene in one of my gomens fics even

Burn this into your brains forever (E, 10k): to me this is an underrated fic for how funny it is. Fake dating between dean and garth but don’t worry, it’s a destiel fic

Half empty (M, 37k): more of a dean study. Reads like you’re dreaming and nothing makes sense. Dean is confused about everything. Kind of a mysterious vibe, excellent writing

There is rest for the wicked (G, 14k): sleepy, domestic dean. The destiel happens so…. Idk. Naturally. It’s a fic that really stays with you for a long time

Ninety one whiskey (E, 401k): one of thee destiel fics of all time. It’s famously a must-read and for good reason. A war fic, so quite heavy and not for everyone. But an absolute experience. I read the last few chapters in bed middle of the night tears streaming down my face. Simply iconic

A winter’s tale (T, 64k): this fic forever changed the way i see cas’ human arc on the show. Not super destiel-y but can be read that way. Again quite heavy. Northernsparrow is an excellent writer.

The dean winchester beat sheet (E, 144k): au where dean is in college and in complete and utter denial about his sexuality. So supremely funny. I will say this dean is not for everyone. But to me he is iconic and i think about certain scenes still. Forever changed the song i want to break free for me.

What has eight tentacles and isn’t allowed to eat pie? (T, 16k): basically uhhhh dean gets turned into an octopus. HEAR ME OUT. This fic will change you fundamentally as a person. It’s funny but also smart. A classic!

Maybe it really is the end (M, 2k): it’s short but there’s not a word out of place. Basically, belphegor taunts dean and cas while in the body of jack. It’s so good and so underrated. I think about it all the time

How a grocer watches dean pull his head out of his ass in seven days (E, 51k): destiel written from an outsider pov, a christian lady who’s easily scandalised and whose narrative voice is SO hilarious. One of the funniest fics i’ve ever read. Fake dating too!

[scuttle-buttle]

Co-Pilots

Nobody asked for this. I have the flu. I needed something nice to focus on and apparently this was it. Blame @lorna-d-m my partner in crime :) also kudos to winniemaywebber and sagesolscitcewrites because i def read all their stuff and was vibing it and the pet names and stuff sooo hard

Rated: 18+

Word Count: approx. 3k

Tags: MMF, fluff and reassurance, mentions of wartime ptsd, body confidence issues, mentions of having children, PiV sex, female receiving oral, male receiving oral, voyeurism, no stated use of contraception

A/N: Croz is referred to as Crosby, Harry, and Bing in this (so as not to confuse). And idk what rank Rosie is by this point so were just going with Major

✈️

The bright lights blinded you the first time you walked through New York City; tonight was no different. Flashes of neon whites, golds, blues, reds, lit up your path as you entered the lobby to the Ritz hotel. Your husband had made arrangements for you to meet him in the city much as he had a near 2 years ago during the height of the war. You wanted to meet him at the airport. Crosby insisted he find you at the hotel. And now, with Hitler defeated, he was on his way home. For good. 

His phone call had startled you. Usually, you wrote him weekly, sometimes more if you felt lonesome. Harry’s letters were less frequent, but no less loving. Little Steve kept you more than busy most days, back home safe terrorizing your mother and father while you got some rest and relaxation with your Bing in the big city. The toddler was a shining light in your dark days. He had the same dark curls, the same downturned eyes as his father. A piece of your love that was yours no matter what the war brought - or took.

You’d nearly lost your footing when you heard his voice, gruff and mellow, across the line. Darlin’ it's me, he'd said, I'm coming home but I've got some business to finish in the city, meet me there. I'm bringing Rosie, you remember him yeah? Said he'll take us dancing at the best jazz spots. I love you Mrs. Crosby. See you soon.

Now you wait in the lobby for your love and his friend.

Minutes tick by as you wait. Maybe the plane was late? Maybe they had to meet somewhere after landing to debrief? Maybe there was a problem with the engine? Just as your maybes started to drown out the chatter and bustle around you a voice rang out.

“Well ho-ly mackerel, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes Mrs. Crosby.”

The sight of your husband had you dashing into his waiting arms. Tears streamed down your face as you kissed him senseless over and over and over. Crosby couldn’t contain his laughter at your reaction, nor did he bother hiding it when he wiped his eyes dry. 

“I’ve missed you so much Bing.”

His forehead rested on yours. “God how I’ve missed you too, Darlin’.” 

Over his shoulder you notice a taller man, stylish moustache and curls neatly gelled into place, attempting to avert his eyes and give your reunion privacy. You were struck by how attractive he was. “Bing?”

“Oh!” Harry takes a step back. “Darlin’ this is Robert Rosenthal - or Rosie as us boys like to call him.”

Rosie gives a toothy smile and holds out his hand for a firm shake; “so nice to meet you, Mrs. Crosby. Croz here has told me all about you.”

Giving your husband a raised eyebrow, you ask “all good things I hope?”

Both men chuckle. “Only the best, ma’am.” 

The three of you settled into your rooms before deciding that a celebration was in order. Rosie commandeered the evening, promising only the best jazz New York had to offer. Drinks flowed, the band jived, and couples danced the night away. 

Night after night, Rosie took you somewhere new. You’d split your time whirling the dancefloor between both your husband and his pilot friend, never satisfied until your feet ached. Harry claimed all the slow dances, nestled up close to your body. But Rosie? He got the fast-paced, jumping, hip swaying swing that Crosby claimed he couldn’t keep up with. Two left feet, he’d claim. Each morning after you slept in the plush, luxurious Ritz bed until lunchtime while they attended to their military duties. 

Friday rolled around. It had been a week of this routine. You should’ve been exhausted, you should’ve wanted to slow down - after all you were no spring chicken anymore. Yet, something about being in the arms of your husband and Rosie as you swayed to Duke Ellington, Benny Goodman, and Glen Miller felt so right. 

When the barkeep yelled for “last call” you knew it was time to retire for the evening.

“Say, why don’t you come have a nightcap in our room, Rosie? Crosby asked.

The three of you settle into the living room of the suite assigned to you and your husband. Bing plops into an armchair with a satisfied huff. You join Rosenthal on the loveseat, a respectable distance inbetween. A bottle of whisky sits open on the fireplace mantle. Conversation comes and goes as the trio fall from the high of the night. It’s easy. Almost makes the boys forget the horrors they endured in Europe. 

Around 1am the conversation begins to lull as you finish regaling the group with a story of the shenanigans you and your girlfriends would get up to during university days. “-You think you boys were bad flying all around in your skivvies, but it was nothing compared to us girls that night!” Laughter filled the room until all had let it trickle to a close; the silence was warm like the fireplace embers. Robert sat enraptured by your story, by your beauty, by the thought of you under that blue dress and all your curves. He knew he shouldn’t have noticed…..he was just a man after all. And with the things he’d seen? Could you really blame him?

“How long’s it been Rosie?” The question broke the man’s gaze from you and directed it towards Crosby. He didn’t know it was so obvious. 

Rosie was about to stumble out an answer, an apology for looking at you like that, he doesn’t know, when Croz interrupts again. “When’s the last time you felt the touch of a good woman, Rosie?” Harry waits for an answer. Rosenthal can feel his face heat; he runs his fingers through his hair mussing the curls out of place. This confident Crosby was much bolder than the one he’d met when he first shipped out to the 100th. “Before the war?” There is no judgment in his eyes, no disdain or hesitation towards his comrade as he asks. Rosie shakes his head in affirmation. His glass clinks against the table as he sets it down, whisky unfinished.

Crosby sighs. “Too long.”

“Too damn long…” Rosie agrees in a mumble. 

You sit and watch the boys in rapt attention before meeting Bing's chocolatey eyes. Rosenthal is a good man, a great one from what your husband’s letters proved, and he deserves kindness and softness after all he’s been through. They both do. A delicate hand moves to rest on Rosie’s knee where he sits next to you. His brow furrows. The Major flits his gaze between you and your husband.

In all seriousness Crosby says “It’s alright, I don’t mind.” He tilts his head forward in permission, a silent go ahead. 

The navigator noticed how Rosie looked at you all night, how you returned the glances like a game of chicken. Each admiring but neither willing to do anything about it. How the two of you danced around the club without a care in the world at his insistence. He hadn’t seen Rosie smile like that in ages. He knew you hadn’t laughed like that since before he announced he was heading to the front. You definitely were reveling in the attention of both men tonight. This was never something you had discussed with your husband; somehow you just knew each other well enough even after so long apart to know that it was okay. It was something you both wanted.

Your fingers drifted higher on Rosie’s thigh; not enough to be indecent, but enough to get the message across. His larger palm came to rest atop yours, stopping the movement. “You uh- you’re okay with this?” the Brooklyn native questioned. 

Without hesitation you reassure “I am.” 

In a measured, almost odd approach Rosenthal shifts towards you. His lips hover over your cheek for a moment before the softest kiss brushes your skin. The whiskers of his mustache tickle. You can’t help the grin that threatens to break. He continues to kiss along your cheek, once, twice, thrice, each getting closer to your waiting lips. Finally, his chapped lips meet yours. This kiss is awkward at first as he gathers his bearing, quickly finding a rhythm as if no time had passed since he last kissed a pretty dame.

Crosby sunk deeper into his chair as he watched. He could feel the tell-tale sign of his slacks becoming tighter as he watched his best girl and his best friend. “She loves it when you kiss her neck,” he instructed with that smirk of his. Rosie dragged his lips to your throat. “Little lower-” again he shifted “-right there.” A moan slipped from your parted lips as your body warred with the directions from your husband and the attentions from your lover. 

The room felt stifling. Rosie’s coat, your dress, his shirt, your stockings, his trousers, your brassiere - each fluttered off to the floor one by one. Even Bing had lost his button down. 

The Major guided you onto your back along the couch, trailing open mouthed kisses down your sternum, along your breasts. A moment of clarity passed your mind that your body was different now than the last time you had been made love to, whether by your husband or not, since the baby. Your breasts weren't as pert, your stomach was softer than it used to be. Lips pursed, you let out a small sigh. 

“What’s wrong darlin’?” Bing asked. The navigator leaned towards you, brushing a strand of fallen hair from your face. “You know I can read you better than any map.” Rosie stopped and rested his chin on your abdomen to look up. 

“We can stop,” Rosie offered.

“No, It’s silly…” you tried to brush off.

Both men came to your defense immediately. Looking between the two you finally settle on your husband’s face. “It’s just that… since the last time we saw each other I’m different. My body changed and- I don’t know. I want it to be enough for you. For you both,” you add with a look to Rosie.

Crosby drops from the chair to his knees before you. “My pretty girl.” He kisses you slowly. “We’ve all changed.” From below Rosie adds nothing is the same. “You are still the most beautiful, most incredible, woman I’ve ever seen. Gosh - you’re my wife. Mrs. Crosby! I would fight to the ends of the earth to come home to you.” Softer he adds “I did fight to come home to you… and to bring this flak-happy bastard along too,” he laughed, nudging his elbow at his mate. “Now be a good girl and let us treat you right.” At your nod Rosie resumes his ascent down your waiting body. 

With a flourish your panties are gone, your dripping center exposed to his hungry stare. “What does she like, Croz? Because I'm not stopping until she comes begging all over my tongue.” He licks a deep stripe along your slit. “Sweet as sugar, babydoll.” Gone is the man unsure of himself, and in place is a god amongst men who knows exactly what he wants. It’s all you can do to hold on as Rosie devours you at your husband’s suggestions. Fingers dig into the cushions, tangle into his curls as you writhe under him. 

Rosie puts in his best effort to undo you; your husband saunters up to your face, his pants long forgotten. Cock stiff and ready, dripping with need, he runs the tip of his thumb against your bottom lip. Your teeth nibble at the pad.  “Think you can take me too, darlin’?” A whimpered please is all that comes out.

A cacophony of moans fills the air as your senses are assaulted - Rosie latched to your pussy like a lifeline and your Crosby’s cock deep inside your mouth. “That’s it darlin’, just like that. I bet you missed me, huh? I can tell you did, sweet girl. Fuck I missed you….” 

You gave him everything you had as you licked and sucked at his length. You could have sworn it was bigger than you remembered. He could tell by the look in your eyes you were getting closer, hell he was too. Lord knew he didn’t want to finish like some schoolboy in your lovely mouth. Crosby pulled himself out and you gasped for air. Cheeks flushed and sweat dripping down your temple he turned to his partner. “Use your fingers Rose, drives her wild when you crook them up inside her ‘n don't be afraid to get rough - give her a nip.” He punctuated the end of his command with a nip of his own to your throat. Rosie did exactly as instructed, sending you careening further to the edge and hips bucking.

“Oh- please Rosie- oh god don’t stop-” tumbles out as you start to fall. You swear you feel him humming against your clit as his fingers burn pleasure into your skin.

“That’s it darlin’, just let go for him. Being such a good girl for us,” croons your Bing.

When it all gets too much you gently push him from you. He goes gracefully, dropping chaste kisses to your thighs and hips. Despite feeling like a bowl of jello you remember your purpose tonight - to give Rosie a proper homecoming. 

Sitting up you demand he rid himself of his trousers. 

He grins. “Yes ma’am.” 

Just as Rosie goes to cover your body again you place your hand on his broad chest, pushing until he is in a sitting position. You quickly seat yourself over his lap, his length resting against you. Grinding down, he grunts. “Let me take care of you Rosie, it’s okay.” Kissing his temple, the corner of his mouth, his Adam's apple, you repeat “I want to take care of you dear, let me.”

With another roll of your hips he enters you. He feels different than your husband, but no less wonderful. Rosie’s hands land firmly on your hips as you rock above him. He knows he won't last long, you feel too good. “God Croz how do you do it? She’s so- ugh fuck” he grunts, head tossed back as you squeeze his length. 

“I know, Rose, I know. Just like heaven.” Your husband rubs your back as you move.

Rosenthal buries his face in the crook of your neck, his whimpers muffled so that only you can hear. There are no words for him to describe this feeling: the feeling of being comforted, the feeling of warmth, the feeling of home inside you, even if just for tonight. He almost feels a tear spring to his eyes. Circling your arms around his shoulders you remind him that you’ve got him, that he’s safe, that you're here. You pick up the pace as you ride him, bringing him closer and closer to his fate. His pelvis bucks up to meet yours with every roll.

“Honey I- I’m getting real close.”

You seal your lips on his; “I’ve got you, Rosie. I want you to come for me dear.”

With a deep groan he lifts you off his cock, his spend covering your stomachs and lap in a sticky mess. You hold him as he comes down from his high. 

“That was wonderful, thank you…just, thank you.” You kiss him once more; he knows he doesn’t have to thank you for anything, but he does because he’s Rosie. He carefully cleans you of his come with his discarded undershirt.

Crosby drops his lips to the crown of your head, beginning to pull the pins out of your carefully styled hair. “Come here, Darlin’.” He helps to lift you from his colleagues’ lap. “I wanna make love to my wife.” 

In seconds you’re on the floor under Crosby, his cock already buried to the hilt within you. Neither of you move as you both enjoy the feel of each other reunited as husband and wife. Whispered streams of I love you and I missed you and fuck you feel so good tumble from your lips, barely an inch apart. Harry would never need a map to know the curves, the sensitive spots, the constellations of beauty marks on your body - he knew it better in his memory than any map he could chart.

Besides you on the couch Rosie has slumped over to lay down, his arm hanging off towards you. Every breath of your husband’s puffs against your neck, every tickle of hair from across his chest reminds you that he’s here and he’s alive and he’s yours. Emotion overwhelmed you; “Bing, love please, I need you.”

Crosby hitches your thigh up and around his hip; “I’m here Darlin’.” With that he starts to thrust within your walls. His lithe body moves with a power you had nearly forgotten. Each roll of his hips he pounds into you harder, faster, with abandon; his dog tags cool against your breasts where they hung. Harry was a gentle man, but held so much emotion inside. He could let go with you. 

Your next orgasm was building, hotter and faster than the first. Nails raking down your husband’s back, you reached out your other to grab hold of Rosie’s outstretched palm. The slap of skin echoed around the room, mixed with the crackle of the fire and the sound of heaving breaths. 

An inferno raged within you. Every touch, every movement atop you sent sparks down every nerve ending. You didn’t know where you stopped and your husband began. “Fuck Bing mmmm- Harry please-” The rug beneath you rubbed your back raw but you couldn’t bring yourself to care as long as he kept going.

Crosby had his thumb rubbing quick circles on your clit in an instant. “Tell me you’re close, I need you to come Darlin’.” You couldn’t catch your breath so you nodded the best you could while squeezing the life out of Rosie’s fingers.  

Another snap of his hips and you’re gone, obliterated. Everything felt euphoric and white-hot. Crosby follows suit, his release filling you and your name on his tongue. Bruises will surely linger on your thighs. 

There you lay, tangled in the afterglow, your loving husband above you stroking his knuckles against your side and your new lover’s hand in yours. No words needed to be spoken. The moment you shared would be seared into your mind forever playing on repeat. God forbid another crisis happened that would ship your boys out and away from you - yet if it did you would hold on to tonight like a talisman. It had been a long four years, and longer so for them. But the war was won, with spoils a plenty. 

Finally. 

Lips meeting your Bing’s sweat-slicked forehead, your grip on Rosenthal tightens. “Welcome home my boys, welcome home.”  

Tags: @sagesolsticewrites @winniemaywebber @sailorscuttle @thirstyvampyr @hellfirequinnie @lorna-d-m

[blaxcunicorn]

hi hi! i saw your post of requests for writing and i wanted to ask for a roronoa zoro one! something about him being acting like he doesn't have feelings for the reader but when a stranger flirts with reader, he gets super jealous and angry. then reader confronts him and he first acts like nothing happened but after a while he finalley confesses his true feelings? idk if it makes sense but anyway thank you!!

also hope you are doing well, have a nice day!! ^^

Hey friend!

I'm well thank you!

Also, thank you so much for the request! I tried my best to write it, but please give me feedback if I missed anything.

This is my first time writing Zoro, I tried my best to capture his character but he is not the romantic type haha.

Word count: 1.1k

After returning from Whole Cake Island after saving Sanji, you worked as a geisha woman in disguise with Robin in Wano. "I believe Zoro wishes to see you again," Robin said with a smile. You felt the skin on your cheek burn. "W-We have to focus on taking Kaido down…I—" you stopped yourself, knowing that arguing with someone as intellectual as Robin would be a waste of time. "I'll cover up for you, just go and greet him. Besides, he might have collected some valuable information on our customers."

"When you put it like that, I'll go." You say, sneaking out of the house. You feel your stomach growl and decide to take a quick trip to Sanji's new food stand. On your way, you freeze as you hear Zoro talking to Sanji. "Don't you want to see Y/n-swan? She looked gorgeous in her geisha outfit." Sanji drooled. Zoro turned around, blushing, feeling a bit embarrassed. Sanji noticed Zoro's blushing and asked him again if he didn't want to see you. Zoro hesitated for a moment before saying no. You overhear this conversation and feel your heart break into a million pieces. You had been so excited to see Zoro, but now it seemed he didn't want to see you.

Sanji looked at him with confusion. "Why not? I thought you liked her," he said. "I do like her, but I don't want to put her in danger," Zoro explained. "I'm not strong enough to protect her yet. I need to get stronger first." Sanji nodded, understanding Zoro's concerns. "I see what you mean," he said. "But you know, Y/n-Swan is a strong person, too. Maybe you could talk to her about it and see what she thinks." Zoro thought about it for a moment, but he wasn't sure if he was ready to talk to you about his feelings. He knew that you deserved someone strong by your side, but he didn't want to lead you on or hurt you in any way.

He knew that he had to become stronger so that he could protect you and be with you, as the crew had many enemies. He would train harder than ever to become the world's strongest swordsman. He knew it would be a long journey, but he was willing to do whatever it took. The scar on your leg from defending him against Mihawk after their first battle still haunts him.

You quietly walked away, tears streaming down your face. You had been so excited to see Zoro, but now it seemed he didn't want to see you. You didn't hear Zoro's confession to Sanji about his feelings for you, as you had already left.

After your Captain's victory over Kaido, Wano hosted a big banquet party to celebrate their new freedom. You sat next to Nami, confiding in her. Nami listened patiently, his eyes wide with empathy. "Don't worry, Y/n. That idiot loves you. He just doesn't know how to show it sometimes." You smile as you find comfort in Nami's words. You feel a tap on your shoulder and turn around to see Mr. Kuyama standing there. He was one of your clients during your undercover job as a geisha woman.

He looked at you with admiration and said, "Y/n-chan, you are the most beautiful geisha I have ever seen. I would be honoured if you would consider marrying me." You felt flattered but didn't know how to respond. Nami stared at you in disbelief; there was no way you were going to leave the crew for a marriage. However, if you marry him, you'll be the richest woman in Wano. Nami drooled over the thought of the money your kind heart would gift her. Before she could say anything, Zoro noticed the man's advances and felt a burning sensation in his chest. His grip tightened around his sake bottle as he struggled to contain his rage.He couldn't bear the thought of you being with anyone else but him. Feeling the tension, Luffy stretched his arm, dragged you to him, and stuffed your mount with meat, hoping to help Zoro by observing the situation from a distance. The Captain facepalm himself when he sees Zoro walking up to Kuyama, grabbing his shirt. "Hey, back off. She is not available for marriage." He said between his teeth. "M-My a-apologies Zoro-San", the poor man managed to stutter out before running away. You could swear that he wetted himself a bit.

Zoro turns around and sees your disapproved face, he could tell he messed up. He left in embarrassment, knowing that you'd confront him anytime soon. It'd be better for the two of you to talk in private. You left Luffy's side to follow Zoro, knowing he'd probably want to choose the meeting spot.

You spotted Zoro standing alone outside, staring at the stars. With hesitant yet determined footsteps, you approached him, letting out a heavy sigh. "Zoro," you started, gently yet firm. "Zoro, what happened earlier?"

He turned to face you, his expression guarded as he pretended not to know what you were talking about. "Nothing," he replied sharply, his tone short. Your frustration grew as he dodged her question. "Zoro, please," you urged, her voice tinged with urgency. "I saw how you reacted. Please tell me what's bothering you."

"I just couldn't bear to see you… with him," he mumbled. "Huh?" you said in confusion. "I just couldn't bear to see you with him, okay!" His honest admission softened your heart. You closed the distance between you and gently touched his arm, offering him silent comfort.

"I see, I didn't know as I thought you didn't want to see me." Zoro is now the confused one. "What are you talking about?"

"I overheard you talking to Sanji about not wanting to see me," you mutter, looking down. He gently lifts your chin to look you in the eyes. "It's not that I don't want to see you. Hell, I would rather spend time with you than training. I just wish I was strong enough to protect you. I don't want anyone else to take you away from me." You smiled, feeling a sense of ease by his confession. "You don't have to protect me, Zoro. Just love me."

With those words, Zoro pulled you into his arms and gently kissed you. The rest of the world melted away as you lost yourselves in the moment.

As you pulled away from each other, Zoro looked at you with a newfound sense of confidence. "I'll always protect you, Y/n. No matter what." Since that day, the two of you have been inseparable.

[jisvno]

tokyo revengers characters when they see you cry and they comfort you

ft; mikey, kazutora, rindou

genre; partly angst?? with very comfort fluff

tw; mention of abusive parents (kazu), period one (is tw needed? idk but in rindou part)

♡ manjiro 'mikey' sano

it was another hard day. school, people, emotions, everything was overwhelming you today. you thought that at least you would meet your boyfriend in the afternoon, but he already had plans with ken, so you were left alone. comfort series and sweets did nothing good, but they caused you to get a mental breakdown. you started to cry, overloaded with the day and the lack of any happiness today. manjiro finished meeting with the draken, and he promised you that you would meet today, so he came to your place. he knocked on your door a few times but you wouldnt open it for him, being too tearful, so manjiros got a bit confused and he used the spare key you once gave him and went inside. he immediately heard the sound of crying coming from your room, and after a while he appeared there, seeing you all tearful, tears streaming down your face, red cheeks and shaking body. He immediately came over, sitting next to you and lightly stroking your back with his hand. 'what happened, honey?' he whispered, wrapping his arm lightly around your waist and hugging you. 'tell me, ill listen and try to help you..' he said softly, all the while stroking your back and shoulders. you finally calmed down enough to tell him about what a hard and overwhelming day you've had. manjiro listened to you the whole time, wondering how he could help you. when you finished speaking, he cupped your cheeks and wiped away the tears with his thumbs, looking into your eyes. 'i love you so much, you know? You are really strong and i believe that youll be able to overcome this and tomorrow will be better. remember, im here for you' he said, leaning back slightly and laying on the bed on his back, pulling you in and hugging you tightly. you felt his body heat, the smell of his perfume and just closeness and comfort, so after a while you stopped crying completely. manjiro said sweet things to you all the time, complimented you and talked about how much he loves you and how important you are to him. he decided to stay here for the night so you can rest in his arms. he lightly stroked your hair, which made you feel safe and after a tiring day you fall asleep in the arms of your most wonderful boyfriend

♡ kazutora hanemiya

you were just at school, coming out of your math class. you couldnt believe that despite studying for so long, you got another F. you were disappointed in yourself, fact, but the most stressed thing was what your parents would do after discovering your another bad grade. they were strict and always yelled at you for bad grades, they also hit you sometimes, you were afraid of them and thats why you spent so much time studying, which didnt always work. you were stressed that once again they could raise a hand on you for another F, so tears came to your eyes. you saw kazutora, who was walking towards you with a smile, wanting to show you something after the end of the lesson. but you were in bad shape now, so you ran away from him, ran upstairs to an empty auditorium, where you sat in the corner of the room and cried. you curled up, burying your head in your knees and crying silently, stressed out by the grades. kazutora ran after you, and when he saw you, his heart broke. he sat next to you, he didnt touch you, just looked at you. 'hey, what.. what happened?' he said quietly so as not to scare you. all you could whisper was that you got another F. kazutora knew what your parents were like, you told him that, and he saw how stressed and scared you were. he didnt quite know what to do, but he got up, taking your hand and gently pulling it to get you up. he walked out of school with you and put you on his bike, he sat in front of you and off you went. after a while you and him came to an empty place by the river, full of grass and flowers, you could see most of the city from here, it was really quiet and peaceful here. kazutora got off the bike, giving you his hand, and you sat down on the grass together. still not saying anything, he started picking the flowers, making a wreath out of them, and put it on your head, smiling slightly at the sight. 'you look beautiful, darling' he said, placing his hand on your cheek and stroking it with his thumb. 'i cant help people, but remember that im always here, ill always find time for you to sit with you and take your mind off the bad' he said softly, looking into your eyes. you were thankful to him for not continuing the topic. you two sat on the grass for a while, and then he took you on a bike ride around the city, and finally he took you to his house, where he made you stay the night, where you watched cartoons and laughed all night. you were very happy that you have such a great boyfriend who will always help you take your mind off the bad things

♡ rindou haitani

you were just at your boyfriends house when you felt you had to go to the bathroom. you just got your period, so you use your pad and went back to his room. rindou was sitting at his desk, looking on the computer for something he wanted to show you, and you sat on the bed. suddenly you felt very painful cramps, that you lay down, slightly cringing from the pain. it was so strong that after a while tears flowed from your eyes and you cried silently, unable to bear the pain. when rindou heard your cry, he immediately turned to look at you. 'baby, why are you crying?' he asked softly, and when you told him that you had just gotten your period and were having terrible cramps, he got up, took some painkillers from the cupboard and gave you along with water, then lay down next to you, hugging you tight from behind and stroking your belly with his warm hands. it helped you so much, just his warmness and closeness. he started telling you a story about another 'dumb' thing that ran did, and how stupid he is, because we all know that rins favourite thing to do is teasing ran. after a while the medicine kicked in and you felt a little better and rindou kissed your hair. 'i dont like it when you cry, it makes you look ugly. you look prettier when you smile or laugh,' he said, and immediately had an idea of ​​how to make you feel better. yes, you spent the rest of the evening teasing and arguing with poor ran, who tried to defend himself, but it was 2vs1 battle so he was loosing, which of course kept a smile on your face, you were really grateful to your boyfriend for being there for you and rindou was pleased with himself that his favorite activity gives you a lot of pleasure too

~ vani's note

first writing here! im not very proud of it, but i guess its not that bad, hope that youll like it! you can request your things, and please tell me if something was bad or just tell me your thought about it!

see you next time!

~vani ♡

[angel-anachronism]

Here's a part 2 of this ghost and pals fanfic. I wrote this all in one sitting so I'm very eepy :(

Either way, here's the story!

Part 2:Learning that being weak is not so bad

(Just a side note, Anais is Slurpee's name in this fanfic. Just for people who would be confused. Also this is a platonic fanfic just cuz idk k bye!!!)

Francie was bored out of her mind, no exaggeration… well, maybe just a little exaggeration, but the girl still felt like she would much rather watch paint dry on a wall than listen to her parents brag to the Pierres about life, and Pierres bragging back while at the fancy dinner table. Christopher seemed to be in an agreement with her as he began playing with his food, looking as if he was pretending that the plate was a warzone. Even so, he still didn’t make a mess, keeping everything in his plate. 

As the boy kept playing, a new hand slapped his so that he could stop from creating a culinary mess. As expected, Chris’ older twin sister was the one who made him stop. Unlike her brother, Anais was a lot nicer to Francie, and in Francie’s opinion, even prettier. It would be a lie to say the Pierre children weren’t adorable, with those big grey eyes which held so much innocence in them… well, as innocent as a rascal like Christopher could be. What Francie liked most about Anais’ appearance was her hair: It was full of long ringlets which streamed down her fat pink cheeks and down a little lower than her shoulders. These curls were ornate with ribbons at both sides of her head, making her look like a fairy in the girl’s childish mind.

“So, what kind of talents do your children have?” Francie’s head tilted towards her mother who asked a question to Mrs Pierre.

“Oh, my little Anais loves Ballet and singing. She’s like a little graceful swan when she dances! She even rubbed off some of her talents on little Chris, but his father told him to follow more manly passions, like baseball!” The woman laughed, before looking at her children from across the table. “Christopher, why don’t you show your new friend a bit of what you’ve been practicing lately with “Roger”! I bet little Frances will love seeing your baseball bat mastery!”

Christopher just nodded and hopped off the chair and walked towards where Francie was sitting. In her mind, Francie knew that she’d keep teasing the boy with the fact that he was a mama’s boy for the rest of his life.

Mrs Pierre asked Anais if she wanted to come too, but she simply responded with a “no!”, which made Francie feel slightly hesitant to follow Christopher. She didn’t want to fight with him again…

Just like that, they were now in the garden. Francie put a small picnic blanket on the ground to not make her dress a mess again from all the dirt and grass. She watched as Christopher put on a baseball cap and picked up a baseball bat, which she assumes is “Roger”, from near a tree, probably from where he left after his last baseball practice, which must’ve been from not so long ago as nobody would just leave a baseball bat on the grass for days on end. 

The boy threw a baseball at a tree and tried to smack the baseball to be mirrored in the opposite direction from where Christopher was when the ball was supposed to make contact with his bat, but instead, the baseball flew past the bat and against the wall of the mansion. Christopher didn’t seem pleased, but at the same time he tried to appear calm. Francie could see that he would throw a tantrum if only she wasn’t there. 

“Can you perhaps throw the ball and then have to catch it?” The girl was shocked when Christopher asked her this. 

“But I never played baseball. It’s too rowdy for such a small lady like me!” Francie giggled, trying to appear innocent like a proper young madame, when in fact she wanted to see him pout and have his face turn red in anger. It would’ve been a funny sight!

But it never came, only getting a glare from him, the type of glare you’d get from your mother when you won’t obey her when asked to do chores: not necesarily an angry face, but a disappointed one indeed. 

In the end, the girl just huffed and took a mitt from near the tree and put it on her right hand, leaving her dominant left hand to throw the ball.

As she threw it, Christopher once again missed, even falling on the ground from accidentally spinning. ‘What a muppet!’ Francie thought mentally as she walked towards him to help him get up. It was the least she could do to be honest.

Christopher, instead of accepting her gesture on kindness, began throwing a tantrum. “How dare you try to give me your hand like I’m some coward! I am not a coward, and I am not a little girl like you. I. AM. A. MAN!” He capitalized the last words with his yelling, which sort of scared Francie. Nobody ever yelled at her this loudly and aggressively before, so this was new. “If my father saw this, he would be displeased! NO, NO, NO!” the boy stomped on the ground, and Francie could see him have tears in his eyes. 

“You’re such a crybaby! Suck it up!” Francie merely said, as she held resentment for the fact the boy called her a “little girl”, most likely trying to call her a “weak and pathetic coward”. 

“How?! Father will make me wear pink frilly dresses like Anais! He’ll make fun of me in front of everybody! I don’t want everybody to call me “Christina” again! I don’t want to be treated like you! You’re so weak, and I don’t want to be weak!”

Francie thought he was exaggerating. What kind of father would humiliate his own child? Who would do such a thing? It all sounded rather silly to her.

Christopher threw his cap at the ground and began walking away to sit in a tree, and probably cry like the wimp he is! The girl knew she couldn’t help him as he didn’t want any help, so she just started walking back inside the manor, much to Christopher’s dismay. As much as he wanted to seem brave and strong, he felt awfully weak, and he just showed his weakness to somebody! Somebody who’ll make fun of him, somebody who’ll throw rocks at him, somebody who’ll mock him for all eternity. At the moment, Christopher wanted to hide, to not be seen by anyone. He wanted to cry, yet nobody would be there to listen to his cries. His father would tell him to “up and Adam”, while his mother would say “You’re my brave boy. No need for tears.” only to make him quiet. It was no fair that Anais and even Frances could get away with being weak, yet when he did, he was viewed as a wimp. He didn’t want to be a wimp!

Francie found Anais in a room with two beds, playing with a ragdoll. Unlike Francie, Anais liked the minuscule things in life, things that nobody would bat an eye on, meanwhile, the little brunette girl’s only best friends were diamonds and pretty things alike.

“Hello, Anais! what are you doing?” Asked Francie as she stepped in the room. Anais smiled at her “I’m playing with this doll Babette gave me!” Babette was one of the maids who took care of Anais and Christopher, almost like a nanny.

“Your brother is being annoying!” Francie pouted as she crossed her arms. Anais began giggling “What did he do this time?”

“He started yelling at me for throwing the baseball wrong!” Francie grumbled.

“Oh, he does that usually! One time he broke maman’s favourite pocket mirror. She was so sad… He doesn’t like baseball a lot, I can tell by his fury when he makes a mistake while playing it.”

“He’s now being a crybaby in the garden… I don’t want my mummy to think that I upset him again…” Francie huffed. 

“...Maybe this will help!” The girl was taken by shock when Anais gave her the ragdoll. 

“I don’t think so… I don’t think he likes dolls…” Francie sighed. Anais kept her hands tight on Francie’s and just said “Trust me!” with sparkling trustful eyes.

As Christopher was sitting in a tree, he was trying not to cry, even slapping his cheek, alike his father when he broke something.

“Hey, Chris!” The boy felt like screaming again. That annoying voice again!

“WHAT DO YOU WANT?” He said, trying not to cry. Francie just showed the ragdoll upwards to where he was sitting. “See this doll. It’s just like you!” 

“That filthy thing?!” 

“It’s not filthy! No matter how it looks, it deserves to be understood! And you deserve it too!”

“...pardon?”

“You heard me! You might be weak sometimes, but that is quite alright! You don’t need to be like a hero in fairytales! I believe in you, Christopher! You are a strong and brave boy, no matter how you’re feeling!”

Christopher got down from the tree, his eyes puffy from crying. He didn’t have any more power to fight, so he just collapsed in Francie’s arms and began crying like a little baby. Francie was honestly quite shocked. From the arrogant little rich boy he was, into a crying mess in just one day. She knew that Anais knew all his weak spots, as he was her twin, but she didn’t expect for it to work.

After a few minutes, Christopher stopped crying, and gently shoved Francie, not really in a mean way, more in a playful way, one that he tried to disguise as a mean gesture, only for it to come out exactly as it was. He began walking back to his room, taking the doll in his hand. 

The end of the Pierre and Elsner meeting came, and Christopher had to say goodbye from Francie. What Francie didn’t know was that Christopher oddly felt… better. So much so, he tucked the ragdoll next to him in bed.

“Did Francie give you that? Are you two friends now?” Anais giggled, knowing she was the perpetrator of this whole thing.

“No.” Christopher replied before going to sleep. But Anais knew: Christopher was quite content.

[miyamiwu]

Not so much a theory but just me trying to make sense of everything that's happened so far. This will be a stream-of-consciousness dump.

LINK CLICK S2E8 SPOILERS!!!

------------

So remember how, in season 1, when CXS changed something in the past, it would later reflect in their present? In the kidnapped child case, kid!CXS and adult!CXS had appeared at the same time. In the Xu Shanshan case, the gang received a mysterious call, which turned out to be because an alt!CXS had issued a challenged to red-eyes in the past.

So with that in mind, we can just focus on one timeline—the one being shown to us. Any changes made in alternate timelines would reflect in the present that the audience sees.

Our current present is LG saving CXS from being kidnapped, resulting in him taking his place.

Qiao Ling had hypothesized that maybe that wasn't Lu Guang but an alt-timeline!CXS because LG seemed more physically strong.

For this hypothesis to be true, CXS has to dive into the past as Lu Guang and rescue the past!CXS in one go. (A photo can only be used once.)

The chances of this going correctly is slim. Without Lu Guang, Cheng Xiaoshi has no idea what's gonna happen while in the dive. He didn't even know what object Lu Guang used to break the window (it was definitely not the kettle!). Also, does he even know where to find a speedboat? How about driving one? And if you had looked closely in the LG and LTC fight, you can see that LG was always trying to avoid being touched by LTC. That means he already knows how his ability is activated. On the off-chance CXS manages to reach past!CXS on time, it will all be for naught anyway coz he won't able to defend against LTC.

That's why I think Qiao Ling is wrong. It was never an alt!LG. It was the real Lu Guang all along.

As for how to explain his improved physical state... well, that's something I don't have an answer yet for. I do believe in the alt-timeline/future Lu Guang theories, though. If LG is from the future, maybe he's had some time to train.

Another theory of mine is that LG didn't actually suddenly got better at martial arts. He just knew how Li Tianchen would move, so he was able to defend against him. (Maybe LG can see the future).

Or maybe Lu Guang had relived this rescue many times and only now did he finally get it right. (Time loop maybe?)

As for him being able to resist the pain of his injury... idk man, adrenaline, I guess? Love can make you desperate lol.

Anyways, writing-wise, it's so easy to just dump everything on Lu Guang coz he's still shrouded in mystery. He's always seemed like he knows a lot about their abilities, and who knows what the true extent of his abilities is.

If Cheng Xiaoshi can't do the rescue right in one go, then how are they gonna explain him diving a second time?

Also, I find it hard to believe that CXS would want to endanger Lu Guang many times while he's acting as him. If he just doesn't dive, won't Lu Guang be saved?

What's sus here is the photo LG left. Did he know CXS can open his phone, or was that a save point he had actually left for himself in case he fails to save CXS?

But why would he not bring his phone? Was he afraid the enemy would get ahold of it?

But without his phone, and by extension, the photo, how can he go back in time?

Maybe his time-travel ability doesn't require a photo? (LTC definitely didn't have a photo when he was controlling WJ and CXS. His ability was just activated by touch)

Come to think of it, CXS's ability is also activated by touch (clapping). What about Lu Guang? Maybe he has a touch-based ability, too. After all, they can have more than one abilities.

LG can see what happens in a photo, and thru CXS diving, he can also record it. If it's a CCTV, he can hijack it and make it his eyes.

LTC can possess someone directly, but he can also just bewitch them through touch.

CXS can go back in time, and he can also possess people

I have no idea where I'm going here... Still confused as ever

[azsazz]

Okay, this is the response to the anon that wanted to talk about cc and contained spoilers:

"I just finished Crescent City today after swearing I was done with SJM because ACOWAR and ACOFAS were so disappointing to me. SPOILERS

—————cc1 spoilers under cut——————————

And I totally wasn’t expecting to see them using phones and other modern technology. So i agree with the other anon, it kind of took me out of it a bit, but not by much. I will say IMO the book was way too long and the murder investigation and the initial “plot twist” were messily done. It just draggedddd and was very boring to me.

The last 20 chapters were good though. But i couldn’t stop thinking why the hell nobody left the Summit to help Bryce. Like Ruhn and Fury were sitting there like “he’s gonna kill her”. So GO??? Are you really just gonna watch your sister die via Twitch stream?? LMAO I know they sent the Aux but they’re not as powerful as everyone who stayed back and it irritated me so badly when Bryce was fighting for her life, and they were just watching it like it’s a movie. Only one i won’t fault is Hunt cause he was nerfed by his handcuffs.

Also Sarah loves a “one drop of power from everyone” moment omg 😭 I liked that we started the series with Bryce at 25 instead of as a barely adult teenager. I think that’s why I started CC1, cause I read TOG and ACOTAR in high school and college, and I don’t want to read about another 17yo heroine. Or a 19yo who is in love with a 350yo.

The ending of the book confused me though cause it felt like a stand alone w/o the epilogue. It ended very cleanly. Like, what now? I don’t have to read the next 2 books if I don’t want to.

Sorry for spewing all my thoughts at you!! No one else I know is reading it so :/"

First of all, you're always welcome to share your thoughts with me! I love getting to chat and hear everyones predictions and opinions!

yes, i agree that the books are WAY too long. i just don't understand...i felt like half of the book was unnecessary. so boring and bryce was not relatable no matter how hard sjm tried to make her.

the climax of the book is usually the best part haha. Idk what fury was doing that time because i don't remember but what i thought was was that ruhn was essentially trapped there at the summit? LMAO TWITCH STREAM IM SO DEAD. Also i figured they were conveniently too far away from her to be able to get there in time to help.

yeah, it's nice that she's older than the other mc's but i'm wondering why it's so necessary for every book to add the mc's age? like what if we just didn't say how old she was? what in the plot would change?

yeah, i mean i can't blame you there. i'll be doing a cliff notes type thing for cc3 for those who don't want to read it lol...

thank you for coming to chat!! 💙💙

[rabbitechoes]

june felt like a relatively uneventful month for new records despite some big names dropping. that could just be because i was just obsessed with that one green album everyone was talking about, but idk. anyways, here are all of the albums, EPs, and mixtapes i wrote about this month!! to check out my thoughts on some of the songs that dropped this month click here!!! also feel free to follow me on rate your music and twitter <3

BRAT - Charli XCX

🥇 BEST ALBUM OF THE MONTH

◇ released: June 7, 2024 ◇ genres: electropop, electronic dance music, bubblegum bass, electro house

Ever since her landmark Vroom Vroom EP from 2016, Charli XCX has gained a reputation for making “pop music from the future.” Every project she released coming into this current decade was boundary-pushing, it sounded so far ahead of nearly all of her contemporaries. In many cases, those projects still do, and those said contemporaries are still playing catch-up all these years later. That sound was captured not only by her own artistic sensibilities and knack for off-the-wall pop songwriting but also through her collaborations with likewise boundary-pushing producers like A.G. Cook and the late SOPHIE. Following a relatively disappointing release in the form of 2022’s CRASH, a record made with the primary goal of fulfilling her deal with the Asylum label, many were left uncertain about what the future might look like for her. She clearly harbored some frustration with the label, but maybe things would be different from now on. BRAT is certainly something different, a very unique record. One that strikes an impressive balance between nostalgia and that forward-thinking experimentation she became known for. It blends a love for 2000s club/dance music with some of the most nuanced songwriting of her career. BRAT is an album that only Charli XCX could make and it’s a testament to her various talents that it works as well as it does. 

The album’s minimalist, crunchy album art was met with some derision when first revealed, even from myself, but Charli’s reasoning for the art ties into some crucial themes on the record. She rejects the dominant image of pop music and its adherence to the squeaky clean – the vulnerable in the most acceptable ways. Charli wants to be messy and this album revels in it. Her writing here is real, confrontational, and occasionally very touching. She pokes fun at her undeniable influence despite not being your typical pop star on tracks like “360” and “Von dutch.” On the track “Girl, so confusing” she takes aim at an unnamed woman in the music industry she’s had a contentious relationship with. “So I” is the most poignant moment on the record as Charli eulogizes SOPHIE in a touching way, while also recognizing her shortcomings and regrets when it comes to their friendship. Many cuts on the album have Charli waxing romantic over her new fiancé, George Daniel of The 1975, and it puts her in a very different light than we’re used to seeing her in – it seems to even catch her off guard. Her writing here is all over the place, but it’s all uniquely her. BRAT offers a messy portrait of the artist and it just feels so refreshing. It sounds like it’s meant to be off-putting and inaccessible, but it’s just entrancing. The fact the record is breaking her streaming numbers further proves that. 

The songs themselves are also excellent. I’m eating some massive crow because as this rollout was happening, I was admittedly a bit underwhelmed by some of the singles. However, hearing them in the context of the full album, it’s some of her best work to date. I don’t know how I didn’t immediately connect with the soaring, red-hot synths on “Von dutch” paired with those explosive hooks. “Club classics” and “B2b” were my favorite singles heading into the album, but they shine even brighter here. They’re just straight-up club anthems. The orchestral production of “Everything is romantic” caught me off guard at first, but the way it bleeds into this jittery electronic beat is just mesmerizing. There is just something so addicting about the production across this album. Even on the more subtle tracks like “I might say something stupid” and “I think about it all the time,” I’m just locked in. The record rarely ever loses its momentum. Charli, A.G. Cook, and a revolving door of some of the most interesting producers have crafted such a distinctive album.

I love BRAT. I think it’s one of Charli’s best projects to date and it further cements her status as one of pop music’s biggest visionaries. Despite being a “get back to your roots” kind of album, it still sounds so fresh and new. To put it simply, no one is doing it like Charli XCX. None of her contemporaries could make an album as nuanced as this while also keeping the “Club classics” coming. It’s just a mess by design and it works incredibly well. This is, without a doubt, one of the best pop albums of the year.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Sentir Que no Sabes - Mabe Fratti

◇ released: June 28, 2024 ◇ genres: art pop, avant-folk, art rock, chamber jazz

The only Mabe Fratti project I’d heard prior to this record was her debut, Pies sobre la tierra. I’m sure she’s had a nice, steady evolution leading up to this record – and I hope to go back through her catalog soon – but jumping from the debut to Sentir Que no Sabes was truly shocking. Coming from an art pop album with folk stylings to art pop with folk stylings AND jazz instrumentation throughout was a shift I wasn’t expecting. Fratti structures these songs like ambient pieces, which I find truly fascinating and unique. The instrumentation is layered and complex, deeply striking too. She captures mood so incredibly well. Hearing the booming upright bass thumps on the opener “Kravitz” was already a lot to take in, but then her vocals coming in with that unreal horn section soon to follow made me know I was about to hear a very special album – and that it is. 

The instrumentation on this album is so inspired. Just as soon as you think you have it figured out, the album does something you could never have anticipated. “Pantalla azul” is one of the more straightforward songs on the record, leaning heavily into the folkier sound, but then it throws these weird synth parts at you. It manages to work incredibly well too, very rarely does a risk not pay off. Fratti sounds incredibly confident in these songs, it comes through in her vocals just as much as it does the instrumentation. She knows when to lay out and let the music do the talking. Like on the “Elastica” songs – in which “Elastica II” comes before “Elastica I” – two instrumental pieces that are so strange. One with these chaotic, dissonant cello leads that make you feel on edge, and the other is just a serene ambient piece. Both are some of my favorite moments on the record. 

Her lyricism across this album also deals with some strange concepts, to the best of my understanding and translating capabilities. Like on “Kravitz” where she sings of “ears in the ceiling” or “Enfrente” where she sings of people lying in order to sleep peacefully. There’s a lot of anxiety on the record and it’s matched in both her lyrics and the music, it’s so fascinating. There’s so much to uncover on this record, I’m still piecing things together after multiple listens. I’m very enamored with this.

Sentir Que no Sabes is one of the most unique albums I’ve heard all year. A massive leap forward for Fratti who ideally can build off of this sound for years and years. It’s such an incredibly fruitful framework that can be molded into so many different shapes. Her range as a composer is on full display here too. These songs are weird, dense, beautiful, and frightening. She revels in all of those feelings. Please do yourself a favor and dive into this album. Despite my adoring this record, I have a feeling Fratti’s best is yet to come which is extremely exciting.

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Impossible Light - Uboa

◇ released: June 28, 2024 ◇ genres: death industrial, dark ambient

Xandra Metcalfe, under the moniker of Uboa, created one of the most visceral and disturbing albums in recent memory with 2019’s The Origin of My Depression. Having finally ventured through that record not too long before diving into this new one, I thought I would be at least a little prepared for Impossible Light – I was dead wrong. There is no way to prepare for a Uboa album. Given the recurring themes both lyrically and musically in her work, you can anticipate what she might throw at you, but you will not be ready for it. I’m very familiar with the “primal scream” songwriting technique, but Metcalfe takes it to an extreme new level that is both captivating and deeply upsetting. Her words are often buried beneath these scorching soundscapes making it hard to discern what she’s saying without reading a transcription of the lyrics. Even without reading the lyrics, these songs crush you, but deciphering Metcalfe’s words makes it hit that much harder. It doesn’t sound like she’s conducting these random bursts of noise and other upsetting sounds, it’s as if she’s running from them – sometimes even resigning herself to them. That choice makes the themes of the album that much more impactful. 

A lot of the same themes from The Origin of My Depression and Impossible Light overlap, but this record dives deeper into them while also providing new layers to Metcalfe’s songwriting. This album kind of picks up where the former left off, I couldn’t imagine experiencing one without the other. She reckons with the traumas of her youth and by extension the struggles she’s faced being trans. This record feels a lot more current, divulging the fluctuating feelings she’s faced over the last few years. She fiercely dissects her own feelings and usually buries them beneath dizzying, disgusting noise in an attempt to drown them out.

“Endocrine Disruptor” is a scathing and brutal attack on those who wrongfully believe trans people are “unnatural.” She proclaims, after some of her most fiery lyricism, that “If we are unnatural like they say / Then we will take their precious nature away.” It’s chilling and made all the more viscous with the ramshackle percussion and suffocating synth work throughout. “A Puzzle” is one of the most viscerally uncomfortable songs I’ve ever listened to. The sonic shift a little over a minute in throughout the middle portion of the track makes my skin crawl, I genuinely felt a little sick to my stomach for a moment. This album is just unrelenting. Even in the more serene moments, there’s this looming dread that shakes you to your very core. Perhaps the only exception is the closing track, “Impossible Light / Golden Flower,” featuring otay:onii and Liturgy’s Haela Raveena Hunt-Hendrix, which ends the album on a surprisingly optimistic note. For that reason, it’s one of the most striking songs in her catalog. The instrumentation is a lot more light, still overwhelming, but it reminds me of the elation present in a lot of the arrangements on Björk’s Vespertine. She sings of a “light at the end of infinity,” seemingly hoping to find some recovery from all of the trauma she’s dealt with. It’s an emotional moment and ends the album in a much different place than its predecessor. 

I believe Impossible Light is Metcalfe’s strongest record yet. It’s one of those albums where words can’t do it justice, you just have to experience it and see how it makes you feel. My first listen to this album took a lot out of me. I typically can handle heavy albums, but this made me feel like I’d been to hell and back. This is not my lived experience, yet I felt everything to my very core. Incredibly potent album.

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Resort - Skee Mask

◇ released: June 13, 2024 ◇ genres: idm, ambient techno

German ambient techno producer Skee Mask has crafted an immersive and warm collection of tracks on his new album Resort. I usually find IDM stuff feels sort of cold, or wintery, but Resort is firmly a summer album. No doubt influenced by the fact that it’s currently summer where I live, but these songs all sound like summer. The hot pavement beneath your feet, sitting outside bathing in the sunlight, the cool breeze that occasionally blows past you for shorter than you would like, or sitting inside as the air conditioning saves your life, this album covers all of those feelings. It’s weirdly visceral. I find myself being unable to “zone out” to it, whenever I listen it has my full attention. I just end up getting lost in these tracks. 

Despite all of these pieces being very atmospheric and ambient, there’s usually something wild or crazy thrown in to shake things up. Like the jittering drum beats on “Reminiscrmx” interspersed alongside the sunny synth foundation. “Daytime Gamer” is one of the best songs I’ve heard all year, it’s so well-crafted. The song’s bridge is just otherworldly, he has such a good understanding of how to keep the listener engaged both with the sounds he implements and how these songs are structured. One of the wildest moments on the record comes with “Schneiders Paradox” which has the kind of rhythm you can’t sink into, it keeps you on your toes. I love all of the weird sounds on this cut. I also love the weird reversed percussion used on tracks like “BB Care” and “7AM At The Rodeo” it all just sounds so unreal yet it circles back to feeling very real. Most of the songs here are absolutely striking in some way.

There are so many cool little details spread across this album, some obvious and some that only reveal themselves on repeat listens. Resort definitely feels like one of those records that begs to be experienced more than once and the music justifies that. This album was the first time I’d ever listened to Skee Mask’s music and it was a damn good experience. I’m not super well-versed in the IDM world, outside of a few of the “important” artists, but it’s records like this that make me want to do a deep dive into the genre.

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Dissection Maps - Old Saw

◇ released: June 21, 2024 ◇ genres: ambient americana, drone, american primitivism

Dissection Maps is like a roadmap for a place that’s completely out of time. Not in the sense that its days are numbered, but there is no context of time. This place is of both every time and no time at all. The one thing that’s for certain is that it’s all uniquely American, almost disturbingly so. Old Saw’s work feels both small-scale and sprawling. There’s this deep organic intimacy to it all, no doubt due largely to the implementation of a lot of traditional folk instruments, but it also feels all-encompassing. It captures a specific setting so well and without words. The music just guides you along and tells you all you need to know. It’s like a spiritual dissection of rural America's nooks and crannies – I don’t consider myself to be a spiritual person, but these songs feel almost religious. The instrumentation lifts you up to the clouds, surveying the sites beneath you. The trees, the plains, the long roads that lead you into town – however, it also feels like you’re completely grounded, looking up at the trees and out to the plains as you drive down that long road into town. Such a unique listening experience, at least for me. 

The feelings it conjures up usually aren’t serene or peaceful, they’re often desolate and hopeless. Like the drone towards the end of “Dealt in Silver” with the church bells ringing out of time without warning. It’s like you’re looking up at these bells shaking and rattling, making so much noise, as the hot sun beats on your face. “Revival Hearing” breaks things up a bit with the jaunty banjo and subdued bells that open the track, but then the drone comes in. It’s like even in the more joyful moments there’s a looming feeling of dread. It’s both captivating and frightening, an impressive display of the band’s abilities. I was a little let down by Old Saw’s last record, especially after how great their debut was, but they more than made up for it on Dissection Maps. It’s concise and effective, perhaps their strongest record to date. I encourage everyone to experience this.

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NO HANDS - Joey Valence & Brae

◇ released: June 7, 2024 ◇ genres: hardcore hip hop, east coast hip hop

We’re only about halfway through the year and NO HANDS might have secured the spot for the most fun hip hop album of the year. Pennsylvania hip hop duo Joey Valence and Brae have created a short, concise, and frenetic sophomore album. Full of amazing beats, courtesy of Valence, and some of the best hooks in rap I’ve heard all year. They have that bratty edge of the Beastie Boys, but the kind of humor that strictly sets them in the current day with references to things like Omnitrixes from Ben 10 and Beyblade. It’s very referential humor, which I’m usually not a fan of, but it just works for me here. Probably because, sigh, I am a Zoomer. There’s such an infectious energy to this record. It’s nothing world-changing, and it doesn’t need to be, it’s just two guys making a super enjoyable rap record. 

At just a little over 31 minutes, NO HANDS rarely wastes any time. The duo keeps up the energy the entire time. That Beastie Boys influence shines through especially on the first track with the opening call-and-response vocals and they do it very well. It never comes off as a parody despite the unserious tone of the record. That beat is just incredible too, pure hardcore hip hop goodness. “PACKAPUNCH” is even better with amazing performances from the duo and a hilarious Danny Brown verse. “Have your face fucked up like a 2K skin” has been in my head for days. The album throws a curveball at you in the form of the title track which has a great jazz rap beat. The verses from the pair are also among my favorites on the album. They have this kind of irony-tinged nostalgia, making them so much fun to listen to. “THE BADDEST” is their best attempt at a crunk song and it’s so much fun. The way they deliver the line “I’m the baddest bitch in this club” with so much force is so good. Like yeah, you guys are the baddest bitches in this club!   This album just sounds like two friends making music solely for the fun of it. They have incredible chemistry too. They always bring the same energy to these songs, they’re always on the same page. It can be easy to view this album as a joke, but Joey Valence & Brae have genuine talent. They have a good understanding of rap songwriting, especially in the hooks department. Valence’s beats are also incredible and I need to hear him produce more stuff this instant. Not every song is a heater, although most are, but they all sound like they’re trying to be. More often than not, they knock it out of the park. I learned afterward that these guys are big on TikTok, which makes a ton of sense. I usually try to steer clear of TikTok stuff, but I’ll definitely keep an eye out for these two. If you’re looking for a good time, definitely give NO HANDS a listen.

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One Hand Clapping - Paul McCartney & Wings

◇ released: June 14, 2024 ◇ genres: pop rock, power pop

It feels crazy to say this nowadays, but in the early 1970s, Paul McCartney’s post-Beatles output left many fans disappointed. He had a string of big-hit singles, but critically he was fighting an uphill battle. Especially with this new band Wings. Band on the Run marked a slow, but sure shift in McCartney’s favor and he was seemingly looking to bolster this band for stardom. In the summer of 1974, McCartney and crew retreated to Abbey Road Studios to bang out some tunes both new and old. Adding drummer Geoff Britton and young guitarist Jimmy McCulloch to the lineup as well. This lineup would carry them through the preceding Venus and Mars album, with Britton leaving the band during the recording of that album. One Hand Clapping was meant to be a documentary film, but it was abandoned as was the live album recorded for it. The film and the songs themselves have been drip-fed to us through various deluxe editions, bonus tracks, box sets, and whatever else has come out over the last 50 years, but this is the first time we’re getting a full version. This is a pretty fascinating album that features some of the most vibrant versions of these songs ever put to record. There’s this uneasy energy to the recording like everyone is still feeling each other out, but these songs just sound destined to be played in arenas. 

A hallmark of Wings’ live performances was how Linda McCartney would absolutely drench these songs in synthesizers and One Hand Clapping certainly doesn’t let you down in that regard. Hear the opening of “Jet” from this record which features said synths taking the place of the horns on the studio version. Despite that sound certainly not aging well, I kind of like it. It’s a little cheesy, but it does make this album feel a bit more intimate. Stripping away some of the pomp and circumstance while still embracing that schmaltz McCartney became notorious for. Some songs here implement some strings and brass – because many absolutely call for them, Wings did not make very intimate music – but I think it’s interesting to just hear the band on their own from time to time. This isn’t the most consistent or exciting live record, but it does reach some crazy highs. The three-track run of “Band on the Run,” “Live and Let Die,” and “Nineteen Hundred and Eighty-Five” is absolutely electric. Everyone in the band is giving it their all, but it also speaks to how well-written those songs are to begin with. The version of “Junior’s Farm” here is also a standout and might be my favorite version of the song ever. It really showcases McCulloch’s guitar skills too. As does “Wild Life,” which breathes some much-needed life into that cut. When the band goes into that next gear, they sound like superstars, ready to prove everyone wrong. McCartney especially sounds determined to make this thing succeed and the band pulled it off in the end. As I mentioned earlier, this record is full of some decent, sort of unessential songs mixed with some absolute heaters. Hearing Macca meander his way through Tin Pan Alley jazz cuts, “Blue Moon of Kentucky,” or whatever other small ditties he’s come up with has kind of lost its novelty to me after hearing so many outtakes and demos from his more creatively fruitful periods. Still, One Hand Clapping is a good listen if you’re a fan of McCartney and Wings.

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MEGAN - Megan Thee Stallion

◇ released: June 28, 2024 ◇ genres: southern hip hop, trap

On her third full-length album, Megan Thee Stallion takes absolutely no prisoners as she celebrates herself along the way. The aptly self-titled MEGAN is a bold look at one of the biggest stars in music today. I’ve always enjoyed a lot of Megan’s work over the years simply because she just has “it.” She has this undeniable energy and fire in her delivery that just makes her captivating. Made all the more powerful by the slandering she’s faced from hip hop media and her contemporaries in the wake of the whole Tory Lanez situation, which many used as an attempt to attack her for some reason I’m still confused about. I won’t harp on that long, but a lot of artists will express sentiments like “Everyone is talking about me and hating on me!” and it usually falls kind of flat, but in Megan’s case, it absolutely doesn’t. The coverage she’s faced over the last few years has hardly been music-related, it’s been drama and others using her name for clout. She puts her naysayers dead to rights on this album right from the get-go. Opening the album with “HISS” was a fantastic decision. One of the most decisive and effective takedowns of the year. Starts the record off very strong.

This is one of the few times being self-indulgent pays off. Megan rhapsodizes herself across the album over some unabashed Southern – specifically Texas – hip hop. She teams up with frequent collaborator and Texan LilJujuMadeDaBeat among other predominantly southern producers across the record to pretty good effect – although I do think it’s time for a bit of a shift after this record. The first half of the album is full of heaters, but most of my favorite tracks come from the middle section. “Otaku Hot Girl” borders on corny with the intro vocal sample of Adam McArthur, voice actor for Itadori Yuji from the Jujutsu Kaisen English dub, and Megan’s various anime references, but it’s just so much fun that it’s hard to get upset with it. “BOA” was a great single leading up to this record and it still maintains its fire on the record. It’s also an earworm, the repeated “womp, womps” in the hook stick with me for some reason. The latter half of the record sees features from a variety of Southern rappers, most notably UGK – one of the most iconic Southern rap duos. Their feature is nice, but they could’ve phoned it in and it still have been a cool moment. “Accent” has Megan teaming up with GloRilla for their second collab of the year and these two just have so much chemistry.

Megan wanted to fit herself and what she loves on this project, this is all about her. It’s a joy to listen to, even if every song doesn’t end up leaving too much of a lasting impression. This is a statement record, Megan Thee Stallion is here to stay. You certainly haven’t heard the last of her yet. She sounds ready to take on the world.

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The Tw*ts - bar italia

◇ released: June 5, 2024 ◇ genres: slacker rock, post-punk

Everything about bar italia just feels so effortlessly cool and this new EP, The Tw*ts, showcases that very well. Even though I am relatively unfamiliar with the band’s past material, I just get their whole vibe from these four tracks alone. These songs all have an undeniable groove anchoring them, meanwhile the vocalists and the guitars just sort of play along within that groove in often weird, noisy ways. Everything feels so rigid, but also free-flowing. I have a difficult time believing the clashing instrumentation of something like “Sarcoustica” was heavily rehearsed, it sounds so off the cuff. The band just sounds like they have concrete chemistry, knowing how to get the best they can out of these songs while sounding like they are putting in the least amount of effort in the coolest way possible. Like the dreamy, drawn-out closer “sounds like you had to be there.” It’s like a nonchalant attempt at an end credits song. Nothing sounds like a grand statement of any kind on this EP, it’s just a band playing some kickass tunes. These near-12 minutes alone have made me a fan of bar italia, I can’t wait to dive into the rest of their stuff very soon. Doing further research leads me to believe this might be a bit of a “leftovers” EP from stuff made during the recording of their last album, The Twits. Which does make this a weird entry point for the band, but I hope to fill the gaps soon enough.

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HEAT - Tove Lo & SG Lewis

◇ released: June 14, 2024 ◇ genres: dance-pop, euro house

In all honesty, I haven’t been too impressed with Tove Lo’s music over the years. I often find it just doesn’t click with me, although I do have some nostalgia for that “Habits (Stay High)” song because it was one of the wildest things I’d ever heard at the age of 11. Also, it was a free iTunes Single of the Week so I had it on my iPod! However, HEAT is the most I’ve enjoyed a project of hers yet. She teams up with house and disco producer SG Lewis for a collection of club bangers that all fly by while inviting you back for more. The groove of the title track is intoxicating, it is just one of those songs you turn your brain off to and enjoy. The hook is so amazing too, it’s such a well-crafted Euro house track. The other songs are good too, although they don’t reach the heights of that song. Aside from the closing track “Desire” which has both artists working to the best of their abilities. The EP is worth hearing for those two songs alone. One of my biggest takeaways from this EP is how great of a producer SG Lewis is. His production really shines here on all of these cuts. Even when some of the songwriting on the two middle songs leaves something to be desired, it sure as hell sounds good. If you’re in the mood for a quick fix of house bangers, certainly give HEAT a try.

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Samurai - Lupe Fiasco

◇ released: June 28, 2024 ◇ genres: jazz rap, abstract hip hop, boom bap

I had very high hopes upon hearing the title track leading up to this record. It was another great example of Lupe Fiasco’s lyricism as well as his ear for good, jazzy beats. I was excited to hear where he would go on the rest of the album, but I never could’ve predicted what this album was going to be about. Samurai is a concept album and tribute to the late Amy Winehouse. Lupe set out to answer the question, “What would it be like if she was a battle rapper?” It’s a fascinating concept – a unique one to be sure. Unfortunately, despite the intrigue, the music here leaves a lot of potential on the table. Lupe’s lyrical prowess is on full display, but the album often feels unfocused on both the lyrical front and the musical front. He’ll have these elaborate complicated bars and the beat will be very good, but it just isn’t as impactful as I would like it to be. I was more so just impressed by his rapping rather than actively enjoying it. 

What makes songs like the title track and the following “Mumble Rap” great is that they both have hooks that sort of anchor them. Lupe does his lyrical thing, but those hooks elevate the songs to higher levels. The chorus in the latter has him almost mumbling the words playing into the name of the song, which I thought was clever – also helps that the song isn’t just another track dogging on “mumble rap” and instead plays into the concept of the record. “Palaces” and “No. 1 Headband” are also highlights in that regard, but his verses lack a sense of urgency that grabs you. At a brisk 31 minutes, The album’s lasting impression leaves a lot to be desired. These tracks are not bad by any means, many are pretty good, but the bulk of the songs on the album never hit that next level they have the potential to. Samurai has an interesting concept, but the execution just could’ve been a bit stronger.

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Born in the Wild - Tems

◇ released: June 7, 2024 ◇ genres: alté, contemporary r&b

Tems has been making some waves throughout the hip hop and R&B world over the last six years or so. The Nigerian singer-songwriter has released a bunch of singles, two EPs, and has had some notable performances on albums from artists like Drake and Future. Now we finally have Born in the Wild, her debut album, and it’s just as promising as it is disappointing. There are many moments on here where she shines, like on “Burning” or “Love Me JeJe,” but this record only scratches the surface of what I think she is capable of. She seamlessly switches between Alté and neo-soul throughout the album which gives it a good bit of depth, but I can’t help but feel it would be a much stronger project had it been a bit more concise. I do love the production across this album. Tems handles production on multiple tracks here, but it also features contributions from notable Afrobeats producers like GuiltyBeatz, Spax, and P2J. Afrobeats have been making an impact across the world and I don’t think we’re too far off from it being one of the dominant sounds in pop music – we might already be there actually  – but I would much rather an artist like Tems be at the forefront of that rather than someone like Selena Gomez. 

I adore the two tracks I mentioned earlier. The smooth neo-soul of “Burning” perfectly showcases Tems’ ability as a vocalist and songwriter. The chorus is simple, yet effective, which I unfortunately can’t say about some of the cuts here. She has such a commanding presence vocally, I just wish some of the songwriting here matched that same energy. The subtle Afrobeats stylings of “Love Me JeJe” are so satisfying. The song interpolates and shares the same name as a 1997 song from Seyi Sodimu. It’s one of those songs that should be a big hit, but I fear the window has already closed a bit. “Ready” is also a brilliant song, I love the way the sort of jagged percussion juxtaposes both the soft synths beneath and her gorgeous vocals. There’s no shortage of really good stuff here, nothing on this album is bad by any stretch, it just has the potential to be much better. The songwriting leaves a bit to be desired on some of the songs here and it really makes you feel the album’s length. Like the sustained “Oh boy, oh boy …” chorus of “Boy O Boy,” it just feels like a song that isn’t fully finished yet. 

As it stands, Born in the Wild offers a pretty decent showcase for Tems’ various talents, but her best is definitely yet to come. With some spruced-up, more focused songwriting I could see her being a force to be reckoned with. Mark my words, Tems will have a big global hit within the next few years. If I’m wrong, I’ll be surprised!

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Bad Cameo - James Blake & Lil Yachty

◇ released: June 28, 2024 ◇ genres: art pop, alternative r&b, neo-psychedelia, electronic

I’ll fully admit that I went into Bad Cameo feeling jaded at both of the artists involved in this project. I’ve never been a massive fan of James Blake’s work on his own and his comments on “erasing” the saxophone and its contributions to music, even if they were in jest, rubbed me the wrong way. Lil Yachty’s novel shift away from trap with Let’s Start Here and his subsequent shading of the genre that he made a name for himself in has also irritated me despite liking a good bit of that record. So, yeah, I wasn’t exactly excited to hear from these two. Bad Cameo is an awkward, decently crafted record with a couple of bright spots and a whole lot of snoozers. 

Yachty and Blake have the kind of chemistry that suits neither of them. Both of them sound lost on these largely atmospheric tracks. Blake’s vocal style is the same as it’s always been and Yachty’s haven’t adapted well to this style all that well, but I guess I admire the effort. Yachty’s unwieldy singing here has a bit more feeling than Blake’s at the very least. Everything he does sounds so pristine that it makes me feel like if I get too comfortable I might end up knocking some kind of expensive vase over. Like on “Midnight” where Yachty tees up Blake for the most washed-out vocal handoff I’ve heard in a while. Very rarely do these two strike a perfect balance on the record, it often ranges from decent to tolerable to “y’all have no clue what you’re doing and it’s obvious.” I do enjoy some of the production on this record, that’s always been one of Blake’s strongest assets. I adore how “In Grey” sounds, definitely my favorite track on the record. Bad Cameo is ok at best. It offers some decent surprises sometimes, but it often just feels far too aimless and clumsy for its own good. 

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Dopamine - Normani

◇ released: June 14, 2024 ◇ genres: contemporary r&b, pop

Gaining prominence as a member of Fifth Harmony, everyone’s favorite girl group, and through her breakout solo single “Motivation” in 2019, the anticipation has always been decently high for Normani’s full-length solo debut. Well, after all this time, we finally have Dopamine. I enjoyed “Movement” a decent amount, but I would never call it a favorite. Still, I was hopeful to see what she could do on a full album. Unfortunately, Dopamine is a very middling debut when it should be a very exciting one. She falls into all of the R&B cliches and in the process removes almost all of her individuality as an artist. What should be a mind-blowing step forward for a young artist just ends up feeling like … another album. Dopamine’s biggest crime isn’t being bad, although some moments prove to be rough, it’s just painfully generic. Most songs warrant nothing more than a shoulder shrug.

Normani carries herself well, but these tracks fail her, I feel like there’s so much more she’s capable of. The music here shifts between pop rap, R&B, and some dance pop which should give her the chance to show what she can do, but they leave a lot to be desired. The amalgamation of these established pop songwriters and producers doesn’t help matters either. It means everything is competently executed, but it lacks that flair that should make a debut so special. Still, there are some relative gems here. “Take My Time” is a sugary-sweet jam, one of the few songs where everything just works. Normani sounds like a star on this track. “Tantrums” with James Blake is another one of her strongest performances and Blake’s signature ghastly vocals fit well. She teams up with Cardi B on the closing track and lead single “Wild Side,” and it’s decent. Normani sounds like she’s having fun here and Cardi’s exaggerated lyricism provides a good foil. Strange choice for a closer though. Dopamine isn’t a bad album, but it’s held down by generic songs that don’t showcase Normani in the best light. The majority of the tracks here just don’t excite me. Despite it all, Dopamine is the best solo album from a Fifth Harmony member!

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C,XOXO - Camila Cabello

◇ released: June 28, 2024 ◇ genres: alt-pop, contemporary r&b

This new Camila Cabello album was one of my most anticipated of the month because every sign pointed to it being a trainwreck. The shift in sound displayed on the album’s singles and snippets – which many have rightfully called out for being a hodgepodge of much more interesting and subversive pop aesthetics – did not suit Cabello well at all. C,XOXO is a deeply vacant album that also happens to be embarrassingly honest. It’s like a fish out of water that’s hastily reading their diary entries in front of everyone. Cabello sounds desperate to be taken seriously, but not too seriously as to allow for some moments of levity. The end result is just a mess, a boring mess – the worst kind. 

Much has already been said about the lead single “I LUV IT” with its blatant, on the verge of plagiaristic, Charli XCX influence and weird Playboi Carti feature, but that is hardly among the most bizarre choices she makes here. The core of this album is Cabello trying her hand at a variety of pop sounds to varying, often boring, levels of success. Amidst these sterile tracks, we get an interlude featuring BLP Kosher where he starts talking about how Cabello’s music was there for him when he was going through a period of heartbreak. What? Why is this here? It feels like ego-stroking, also who the hell is BLP Kosher? This is a 32-minute album with like three different interludes, she doesn’t manage the time on this album well at all. Perhaps the most bizarre moment on the album comes with “HOT UPTOWN” with Drake – who famously hasn’t been doing too much lately – where the pair stumble their way through a dancehall track. This leads into the song “Uuugly” which, I kid you not, is a Drake solo track. A solo Drake song in the midst of a Camila Cabello album? Not even a good one either, it’s just a baffling decision. I guess Drake’s feature rate has gone down drastically over the last two months. It also takes the focus away from Cabello on her own album. She isn’t doing much to set herself apart either, none of this album sounds uniquely her own. It’s like she’s having a 32-minute identity crisis.

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Timeless - Meghan Trainor

◇ released: June 7, 2024 ◇ genres: pop, dance-pop

Some albums you just listen to out of complete morbid curiosity and Timeless from Meghan Trainor is definitely one of those. The “All About That Bass” singer had a bit of a comeback a few years ago through some big, very irritating, hits on TikTok leading up to her last record Takin’ It Back. That album wasn’t very good, pretty much none of Trainor’s output has been that stellar. The follow-up, Timeless, is perhaps her best album yet and I’m only saying that because I think the opening track “To the Moon” is pretty decent. Trainor makes commercial music. You could imagine pretty much any of the tracks here in a bright and colorful Vitaminwater commercial or something. In fact, the music video for the song “Whoops” features an extended section of Trainor showing off and enjoying a cherry limeade-flavored Sparkling Ice drink during the song’s bridge. She’s brand-friendly in pretty much every aspect. It’s music more obsessed with image and commercial viability than forming a genuine connection with an audience. Her lyrics are all feel-good and empowering which makes you feel like a total asshole for not celebrating it, but my cynical anti-capitalist heart just can’t stomach it all. It’s so impersonal and commercial – money is the motive. The music across this album ranges from either unremarkable to irritating, which is to be expected. Trainor’s blend of doo-wop with current pop sensibilities is more often than not a recipe for disaster and that proves to be the case here as well. T-Pain pops up occasionally to breathe some life into this thing, but it doesn’t do much. Timeless didn’t surprise me, I knew what I was going to get coming into it. The only thing I learned is that I should probably start managing my time better. I could’ve gone for a nice walk in the sun instead of listening to this, I just didn’t need it.

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The Secret of Us - Gracie Abrams

◇ released: June 21, 2024 ◇ genres: singer-songwriter, folk pop, alt-pop

As I’m writing this review, The Secret of Us is predicted to debut at number 2 on the Billboard 200 chart. Now I don’t care about charts, but hearing just how creatively bankrupt this album is, I’m just shocked. I know music is subjective, but this is such a transparently empty record. Gracie Abrams, daughter of film director J.J. Abrams, seems to be the hand-picked apprentice of one Taylor Swift – don’t know if you guys have heard of her. She makes music in a similar vein, that corporately confessional verbose heartache riddled in these songs. Alongside Swift herself, many people from her “camp” are also here – so much so that it feels sort of like a pet project. The National’s Aaron Dessner co-writes most of the songs on the record alongside Abrams. Jack Antonoff obviously produces on the song “us.” – the duet with Swift. Even Justin Vernon, who seems to be wrapped up in this vortex, appears throughout the record. These are all competent artists in their own right, especially Vernon (please get back in the studio, i need another Bon Iver album), but no one is bringing their best here it seems. The album stays in that middle ground of sometimes bad, but mostly just … nothing. None of this makes me feel anything. It’s total in-one-ear-and-out-the-other singer-songwriter music. That kind of breathy folk mixed with the occasional art pop production either doesn’t suit Abrams well at all, or it’s been beaten to the point of exhaustion over the last few years.

I hesitate to say Abrams is a bad songwriter, she just seems painfully average. These songs are all deeply personal, yet have no distinct personality to them. They sound like heartbreak songs that could be shipped out to a number of different artists. They’re also very unadventurous musically. No surprises are thrown at you, once you press play on a song you know where it’s gonna go. Start subdued, go up an octave in the chorus, bring it back down again, rinse, and repeat. I guess it’s just a basic songwriting formula, but when nothing about this album is unique or interesting it wears thin quickly. The best song here is, in fact, the duet with Swift entitled “us.” It opens with this Carrie & Lowell-esque fingerpicked acoustic guitar, but thrown through that pop filter that sucks out the rawness of what makes that sound so special. Despite that, it’s still the most interesting song here musically at least. Everything else about it is fine. Whatever. Who even cares? This isn’t a good album.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ thanks for reading :3

psssst. i made a discord server called COSMIACORD ... if u wanna join and have fun, talk about music, play fortnite, or whatever here's the invite :3 https://discord.gg/rsHMenTU

[xxintruderloverxx]

Another document from ven just now

For some point I'm still in the Mandela Catalogue fandom but really everyone is forgiving Alex but ven made a document this morning because I woke up I helped my grandma doing watering the plants and I checked if there's any post about Alex kister drama and I saw the link and I'm starting to forgive Alex kister my internet friend which is Katari had enough about the Alex kister drama because I want the drama to be over I see people forgives Alex in his community post i feel sorry for him because I hit his feelings in Twitter and his career was ruined by ven and Alex was ok tho and I watched the live stream about the whole document of ven apologizing? About it and I specifically not to be confused and curious but I know why DB is a person and I know why alex is innocent

1. He is not a gr00mer

2. He's not a pr3d@t0r

3. He is not a p3d0phile

4. Don't harassment to anyone or Alex

5. Don't spread about hate on Alex kister just forgive him

6. I already support victims and Alex about this because I'm extremely so upset

7. Mandela Catalogue is not a fetish content stop saying it's a fetish content why would do such a thing

Idk how will the VA's coming back to the Mandela Catalogue to be a actors and I basically had what's on my mind many people deleted the fanarts of mandela Catalogue it makes my brain and heart so upset and they keep unlisted the videos and they keep making a hate in Alex

I cancelled my TMC au's and OC's

Everyone which is the Mandela Catalogue fans or community and crews Some point left the community left they really got so mad about it the actions about Alex

Because they say Mandela Catalogue is a fetish content and Alex said don't make sexual these characters but I don't sexual to the characters I only make a self ship to intruder because yes I only make a AU of it so I feel extremely tired about this

Also have a good day or noon or night and I hope the vol. 5 will be there soon and it's on delayed someone commented me on Twitter because yes and I hope Alex kister is ok and I will wait for his response he deleted his Twitter posts I feel sorry for him and I hope I can subscribe to his channel back because he only has 971k but I'm very still upset and I hope the VA's and the communites and fans and crew might forgive him I already forgive him i commented his community post on YouTube

So again don't harassment on Alex or ven

So I don't stay anyones side I'm on Alex's side and I stand with him for now

Don't judge or hate on me so

And I will see you guys if I'm finished what I'm doing I'm having a break and I have school works and do something for my family and I will see you guys if I come back to draw more Mandela Catalogue characters

So see you intruder homies 🪐

4/9/2024

[jungkooks-lisp]

Hoodie

A/N: Hello. I wrote this to be ambiguous on purpose. You can imagine whoever you want. I’m new to writing on tumblr. IDK if I’ll continue. Maybe this will get me back into writing. This is angsty and a bit sad. Also inspired by the song Hoodie by Hey Violet. I hope you like it.

He’d probably think that you were crazy. He’d have a point. You think you’re crazy. Standing in front of your closet staring at this one article of clothing. Every night for two months. This is ridiculous.

So, why can’t you stop?

You finally take the hoodie from the hanger, once again. The pastel blue color contradicting the pain you feel when touching it or looking at it. You slip the hoodie over your shoulders, covering your tank and pajama shorts. You shut the closet door turning toward your bed. The hoodie’s zipper was broken so you wrapped the two halves in front of yourself. You settled under your covers, curling into yourself. Letting the faint smell of the cologne from the hoodie fill your senses. With the scent, came the memories.

Meeting for the first time after accidentally bumping into each other on the street, belongings scattering on the ground. Frantically apologizing to each other and trying to help pick up everything and get it to the respective owner. Shy glances, accidental hand brushes, and pink-tinged cheeks.

The first date. Low-key dinner and movies at your place. The air between you both getting progressively less awkward as the hours passed. Barely paying any attention to what was happening on the tv screen as your attention was fully on each other. Talking about anything and everything as if you’ve known each other for years.

The nerves and excitement as your faces grew closer and your lips finally met for the first time. The butterflies erupting then and every time after. The same butterflies you got every time you touched or even looked at him.

You remember the first fight you had over something so insignificant that you can’t even remember what it was, but you remember the guilt and sadness that settled after as you sat on your bed. You remember thinking that he left only for him to show up in your doorway looking at you with the same guilt and sadness that you felt. You remember running into his open arms, both of you crying and apologizing.

Two years of memories run through your mind. You don’t know how long you lay there, silent tears streaming down your face and settling on your pillow.

And then the last memory.

It was your fault. You couldn’t handle it. Hardly getting to see each other because you didn’t want the media to find out. The anxiety that comes with constantly worrying that one day, the world would know and the hate would come. The couple times when you were accidentally in the background of a picture next to him and the fans started to question who you were. The quick stab of fear you got when reading the criticism and death threats from the possessive fans. It may have been a very small portion, but it was enough to make you not want to leave your house for a week even though they had no idea who you were.

He was busy and always gone. You understood that, but that didn’t make anything any easier. You felt like the longer you were together, the farther you grew apart. It felt like when you did actually get to spend time together, it became awkward and you didn’t have much to say to each other. It felt like loving each other just wasn’t enough. So, you were selfish. You let him go, because you couldn’t handle it. You weren’t strong enough. You weren’t good enough.

You remember the confusion on his face as you started to explain everything you felt that morphed into growing panic as he realized what you were going to do. You remember the tears on both of your faces as he tried to change your mind. The resignation and understanding on his face when he finally realized that you had already made it up. You remember his arms holding you tightly for the last time. The broken whisper of “I’ll always love you,” in your ear. You remember how numb and cold you felt as he grabbed his jacket and left your house for the last time. Your eyes found the hoodie he left on your couch and you clutched it to your chest as you sobbed until you were so exhausted that you fell asleep right there on the floor in front of your couch.

Two months later, you still love him. You don’t think you’ll ever not love him. You can only hope that the pain will eventually go away. You hope that he’s doing better than you are. You were too much of a coward to answer any calls or texts from him or the other boys afterward. Eventually, they quit trying so hard. You still get a text from each of them at least once a week. You still haven’t read any of them or listened to the voicemails. You can’t. It’ll break the small amount of resolve you have left that keeps you from running back to him and begging for forgiveness that you knew he would give. It's hard enough to see their names in your notifications.

The sudden brightness from your phone that lays on the other side of the bed brings you back to reality. Your eyes immediately recognize his name on the screen and hug the hoodie tighter to your body and curl in on yourself further to keep your hands from reaching out for it.

If you just lay here in his hoodie, eventually, you will be okay.

Right?

[kimberlyannharts]

LAST TIME ON.....Power Rangers Hyperforce?  A bunch of crazy stuff happened that would take too long to explain because my god I am not rewatching all of those three-hour tabletop episodes just for a single one-shot book.  You just need to know there’s a team of rangers called Hyperforce that was mentored by Jen who went through a lot of shenanigans across their time stream until everything broke and they didn’t get a second season and everything sucks.  Also the pink ranger’s dad is the main bad guy and she works for him now.  Got that?  Okay.  Power Rangers Unlimited: Hyperforce.  

- eh you know what, let me just repost the recap from the previews.  it does a decent job at summing up the first season so we might as well have it again as a reminder for what’s happening

- fuck you dad i’m supposed to be taking down my dad

- yeah sorry Chloe but your plan never would have worked.  Jen is not allowed to die in any story ever written with her inclusion

- Alpha 55!!!!!!!!!  I did miss them.  Even if they started the confusing trend of taking MMPR stuff and repainting them gold and black  

- I still can’t fucking believe Joe/Nadira is canon.  Literally for what reason

- It took me a second to remember that Hyperforce went to the North Pole during the first season and I have to say I laughed imagining newbies picking up this mostly serious and dramatic book just to get to this page

- it’s a shame the answer to this was Eddie dumping this beautiful woman at the alter for Vesper and not Vesper simply adding herself to the marriage

- let her cook honestly 

- great character development, everyone!  now anyway 

- [always sunny theme] the gang gets betrayed.  also Marv and Joe are here

- I already made the Emperor Belos joke but now I’m distracted by the fact he’s stealing Drakkon’s half hair/half bald style.  It doesn’t look good guys, no matter where you part it!!!!!!

- you know, serious question here.  Did they give Marv shit for not getting the Battlizer in Hyperforce???  I thought it was just a Thing That Happened and everyone was like haha cool

- “upgraded Rita Repulsa” 

- see even Big Bad Dad thinks this story is rushed

- well at least he’s honest

- I find it funny that they’re pressuring Marv to be the leader just because he’s red when they were mentored by fucking JEN

- it’s a shame Hyperforce is canonically set in 3000s because you know if it wasn’t this would have set off a string of “[random ranger girl] is Chloe’s mom” theories  

- I mean she’s right.  what hope do we have from a team who couldn’t even get a second season

- idk Shattered Grid got fixed pretty easily.  Even the cracks that were supposed to be some huge existential consequence just kinda............were fine 

- Funny coincidence how the Hyperforce team goes to recruit the Wild Force team only for them to already be beaten.  I feel like this would have worked a little better if they went to the Wild Force team because they were pinging for help, because they genuinely don’t give a reason as to why they go to the Wild Force rangers specifically kjlskdlfksj just based on vibes, I guess

- first of all: going from referring to Spa’ark with he/him to they/them pronouns in the span of a panel makes me feel like the misgendering was an editor mistake, which........come on, guys

- second of all: it’s not a surprise that Taylor is the only one left considering her popularity but lbr her popularity is because she’s basically Wild Force’s version of Jen.  Jen, who was a main character in Shattered Grid.  sooooooo not helping the “this is just Shattered Grid” allegations

- third of all: IS DRAKKON THE ONLY VILLAIN TO LOOK AT WHAT RITA’S DOING AND GO UHHHH NO THANKS?  Spa’ark wanted to FIGHT Dark Specter!!!!!  why are they joining him now!!!!!!  why must we continue to destroy any of their nuance!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don’t mind them having a body though despite it being a plot point that they're only a spirit/consciousness that exists inside their morpher/zord because I feel that’s easy enough to bullshit an explanation like Rita fixed them through magic or whatever

[aceoflanterns]

Ok so the in the shortest way I can here is what happened (sorry for responding so late I actually responded a while ago but I’m pretty sure that didn’t send so I have to write this again :,)

So there is this island that some people are trapped on. The island is run by “the federation” and they are evil and they do t want the players to leave, we don’t know why

So they decide that the best way to make the players stay is to give them kids that they need to take care of , to be more exact they are eggs (that are played by real people btw they are not some AI like I thought for a while)

The important egg for this story is Juanaflipp the egg of Charlie Slimecicle and elmariana

Flippa died at 11 days old

It destroyed everyone but especially Slime, he when crazy when Flippa dies

He almost killed the other eggs out of grief, he transformed in an egg bc of the immense grief, so yeah he was not doing great

But after a lot of time and self reflection, he was making baby steps towards recovery

The the birthday stream happened

(Some context, on the server there are this monsters called the code monsters that are played by admins and the whole purpose of these guys seem to be killing the eggs. They can also shape shift to look like the eggs)

Most of the stream is goofy and lighthearted but then there are the last 15 minutes

Slime goes back home and he finds a book that said this

Then a path of torches appeared that lead him to a big underground cave

In the came there is this house and in the house she finds her

Juanaflippa

His baby

His daughter

His everything is here, alive, whit him

She starts placing signs that say things like “I missed you dad” and “happy birthday” in the same broken speech as the one on the book

Slime is understandably super confused but he spend care. All that is important is that he is whit his daughter

The Flippa says that “it’s dangerous for me out there” and “I’ll see you soon” then she runs off

Slime runs after her frantically screaming for her to come back, that he will do anything she says, that he will keep her safe, that she will kill anyone that comes close to her. He begged her not to leave him again but Flippa doesn’t stop running and Slime loses her

He is left crying, alone again

But before the stream ends he promises that he will satay here as long as it takes and that he will make flippa feel save again, no matter the cost

End strea

We, as viewers, know about the code monster and how it can mimic eggs but slime doesn’t. He fully beloved that his baby is back and he will do anything for her, which probably includes killing the other eggs (he already almost did that)

Anyway, I highly recommend watching the last 15 minutes of the stream bc Charlie Slimecicle is an amazing actor and the pain and desperation in his voice is incredible. I’m on mobile so idk how to share the link but just look up Slimecicle on twich and it’s the most recent stream, or you can look up Slimecicle vods on YouTube and watch it there when it gets uploaded

Sorry for any mistakes I made and for responding so late, hope that what I wrote makes sense. How you have a good rest of your day :]]]

damn man that’s A Lot 😭😭😭 listen i just had no idea what was going on in the qsmp from like . early june onwards . so i appreciate the update :]] (and i shall check out the stream because charlie slimesicle is an insane actor and it’s unfair to us all) thank you!!!!

[peppertaemint]

Thank you for your thoughts about my question concerning why BTS fans seem obsessed with what EXO members are doing even to the point they're complaining about Jin having to go serve yet Kai and Sehun don't and it's so stupid: Jin born in 1992, Kai and Sehun born in 1994. Make it make sense. Those are the only two left to enlist and they're not even 30 yet (global age) Anyway they keep up with EXO stats and unprompted will bring up BTS paved the way and EXO fans are "crying" about it lmao I am so confused because most EXO fans who aren't BTS fans don't give a fuck about what BTS is doing. Most of us are just waiting for a full group comeback, the first in almost 5 yrs lol if Lay is involved, that's even longer since we had an OT9 comeback. I just don't get the obsession they have needing to be concerned with what the "flops" are doing if BTS are so much more than Kpop according to a lot of them. It's so annoying to see the nonsense because even though I used to be a big BTS fan, I can honestly say i truly do not care what they're doing, or winning or anything like that. I don't keep tabs on them. Their success has nothing to do with my favorite groups and the quality of music I have been enjoying from them. BTS can go on to win every award until the end of time, it changes nothing for me so I really don't understand why they feel awards and numbers makes a hill of beans to how music fans enjoy music and why they think it matters to everybody.

Anyway, I also asked about WayV lol Did you skip them purposely or you forgot? 😄

Also is SHINee queer??? Lol

I'm gonna talk about WayV, the rolls royce of NCT, on a separate post (hopefully tomorrow). I think they deserve the spotlight.

SHINee are queer? Did I say that? Must have been a typo.

Why do army obsess over so-called flops? I think it's about validation. It makes them feel really good to make other groups of people ostensibly feel bad. They're not music fans (the ones you see behaving like this). They're people who are part of a cultish subculture that gains energy and attracts attention through different forms of bullying and manipulation. It will be interesting when someone makes a documentary about this.

Idk I'm a music fan. I listened to 1.2K different artists last year, which is actually low for me! I've been close to 1.5K before. Anyhow, I like to pay attention to different artists and enjoy what they have on offer. In fact I just caught up on Jackson Wang's Magic Man series and that shit is cray. Loving how balls-to-the-wall he went. I just don't think it's at all interesting to focus on streams or accolades. What I care about is how the music, and the performance since we're talking about Kpop here, hits me. In that sense I think it's good to keep up with different artists. What's not good is doing it just for a sense of superiority. That's not contributing to respectful environment in which art thrives. That's capitalistic nonsense that crushes creativity. Hmm, why is that familiar?

Roll on EXO reunion! I want to see what they got.

[poltergeist-coffee]

WHY DO THINGS ONLY HAPPENS WHEN I LEAVE THE STREAM???

Is the third time, man

First that time when TazerCraft got arrested my phone died and when I came back there was just a fire (and Morse code? I don't remember rn)

Second was when the eggs disappeared and Forever was losing his mind, I WAS ON THAT STREAM FOR 6 HOURS AND CUCURUCHO ONLY SHOWED HIS FACE QHEN I LEFT HECAUSE I HAD TO PUT MY PHONE ON THE CHARGER

And now I had to leave because it was 1am and I was taking a shower

The lore hates me

Pacman duo enjoyers don't have a easy life

Timezones be damned

But I think is fun to think about them, Etoiles is the person everybody trust when it come to fight, he's basically the champion of the island, the first one in the lines of fight, the island's first line of defense(which is what made that time he lost a fight to the codes hit so hard)

And Pac? Well, among the Brazilians, he is the fighter. But if something would need someone to sacrife themselves, he would be the first to offer himself. He has a lack of sense of self-preservation honestly, he would sacrifice himself without hesitation if needed. He's scared, he's traumatized, and mostly, his miss his family being complete. When Forever got drugged he risked himself to find a cure, even if he wasn't sure if he would be okay, and when Bagi and him were talking about bbh being suspect and was giving him cake and by his point of view it looked like he was going to be kidnapped? He ate the cake regardless, Wich Bagi had to come and get him(bbh didn't even know the cake would make him sleep but from Pac pov it seemed so much like he was going to be kidnapped)

At least for me there some similarities between them and they are a fun duo in any case

The day Bobby lost his first life in the air ship I was watching Roier and Jaiden's stream. I had left to go wash my hair and I remember hearing my brother yell at me from outside the bathroom that bobby died KJNSAJKAVNS I was so confused until I got out

Most time lore happens now I miss it unless it's on a weekend because I'm a fulltime student TT the qsmp lore hates us fr, plate anon

Whenever I think of pacmanduo i think of when a bunch of the players were fighting in that ice dungeon. I remember seeing a clip of Pac being SUPER CALM like he was so chill and just chatting with etoiles like it was nothing while fighting off all the enemies and everyone else was SCREAMING jndvkas i want to find the vod to watch it again because i wasn't watching either of them when that event happened

I think its interesting that Pac is such a strong righter but like no one really mentions it? I think yesterday Etoiles mentioned that like he's on the same level as him, Philza and Roier in terms of like PVP? idk hes such a silly guy he just needs to recognize his self worth <//3 HIM AND QETOILES BOTH WITH THE SELF WORTH ISSUES!! qetoiles thinks he's nothing if he can't protect the islanders + without his code weapons and stuff. qpac is also the same that he thinks if he were to die it would be the best? like the Favela/island would lose less because he's not as valuable as the other players WHICH ISN'T TRUE!!! QPAC PLEEEEEASE!!!!

-holding them both gently in my hands- i love them. i also am never forgetting how qpac use to always flirt with qetoiles because it amuses me so much. hes so cute he's a silly guy who likes attention (qpac)

[qhazuban]

thoughts as i read "savage tongues" by azareen van der vliet oloomi, part 4

ok so here's an example. (also i'm reading the book in epub format and i really struggle with citations in this regard, especially with long chapters, which is something i need to figure out for my teaching!! but anyway...) in the first chapter, right, several pages in there's a section where the narrator says (I'm skipping over some parts with ellipses to highlight the areas that stand out most to me):

I was interested in how desire is shaped by the destructive logic of empire, how at times sex facilitates the transmission of historical violence from one body to another. Xavi [her husband], however, possessed a purity I'd never be able to access. He experienced sex as a bridge, as union, as an explosive, an exhilarating coming together; I didn't deny that was so, but that didn't constitute the entire inventory of my experiences. [...] [...] I resisted the line of thought that Xavi was sure would salvage me from my pain: demonizing Omar [someone who abused her] in order to purify myself. I had no interest in obliterating the contradictions of the past. To the contrary, I wanted to savor them. Xavi was, I felt, asking me to ignore the nuances of my relationship with Omar, the historical and political terrain that had informed it. He didn't see that in doing so I would be sacrificing my own sense of self and my ability to articulate that self in language. He didn't understand, at least initially, how his attitude, pure to the extreme, dispossessed me of my own narrative, my sexuality, my appetite for inquiry, my openness to examining the darkest aspects of human nature, the things most people prefer to look away from. I was left to raise the frightening questions alone. In the process of vilifying Omar, Xavi had unwittingly placed an invisible restriction on my speech; what I needed was an eruption of language. He couldn't tolerate the idea that I was complicit in my own destruction, that I had weaponized what little agency I had and wielded it against myself.

so i really like a lot of this! and it's totally something i would reblog or repost, or save to think about, ha.

but the thing is. even if this is just the beginning of the novel and all of this is explored better later, setting the novel up like this -- and having a stream of consciousness intellectual/emotional style of narrative -- only works if there are just as many questions and unanswered fragments and just -- emotions in the present, not only retrospective -- or maybe just if the language is explored more? i'm not sure. i just feel mixed about this. i think that we need more moments of perplexity and narrative confusion.

idk. i'm having trouble expressing this but, based on what i have been reading so far, as well as interviews with the author etc., it does not seem like there's really a lot of the... turning things on their head?... that i feel would actually make this kind of self-reflection more potent.

i think it probably comes across as *very* potent as-is to a lot of people -- and here i worry about sounding haughty again lol -- and it does feel potent to me too. but in an actual friendship or conversation or interaction or communication between diasporic writers and artists, if it were *actually* to be that and not the absolute shit that goes on in the sorry excuse of a literary world that currently exists -- in the moments that actually truly matter -- it's not just a restatement of what we know and we've read and realized and applied to our lives. there's restatement, yes, but there's also interpersonal hypocrisy and chaos and bizarreness and complexity that summing things up just won't work for.

and i worry that this novel -- in setting things up like this -- like how much can you explore scenes if you have already set things up with such clarity of self-actualization? i don't know if that makes sense. but i am just skeptical about what is actually happening here!!!

and also. so many times people say these kinds of things in the circles i've been part of. but what does it matter if, when it comes down to it, hardly anyone *actually* wants to do the extremely difficult work of exploring complicity, power, nuance, complexity, etc. in interpersonal situations???